This week on Clown College.
I wrestled a special needs person.
And they slammed the shit out of you, didn't they?
No, dude.
It was bad because it was senior night and my mom never came to any of my...
She's German. She doesn't do things like that.
Like, support me.
But so she actually came to this wrestling match at senior night,
but they didn't have a person for me to wrestle.
And I was the best dude on the team and I was like, just give me anybody.
And they were like, well, this dude from JV.
And he was clearly something was wrong with them, you know?
And I could have went easy on him, but I beat him like 15 seconds.
I just slammed him on the mat and pinned him.
Just because, you know, he needed to...
I think you should do that.
They should all be treated the same.
Everyone should be treated the same.
And why did you say they?
I was talking about the special needs.
Got to hit a vape after that one, dude.
I feel that.
Get that mojo back.
So we just filmed the whole episode.
We're about to dismount off of and the power just went out.
Yeah.
Because of this storm that nobody knew was coming.
You know.
Came out of nowhere scared the shit out of us.
Things happen for a reason.
Things happen.
It's all a blessing.
We got more pressing things to talk about.
Yes, we do.
Yeah, dude.
All right.
So what is it?
I got to hear about it.
Do we just break it in or we lead it up to it?
I mean, we can save it if we want to talk about some other happenings.
What's happening in the world today, Brandon?
In the world today?
Well, I heard yesterday that John Cena's retiring.
Oh my gosh.
That's deep.
I feel like right now I'm in denial part because they said the 2025 season, but once he's gone,
I'm going to be hurt because dude, that's another era.
I remember when he was there and I was like, damn, look at this new guy coming in here.
You know he wasn't that new because you know he started in 2002.
But when I started watching like 2009, he was on top of the world and I was looking
at Hulk Hogan and Andre the Giant.
Well, Andre's dead.
Hulk Hogan was just old calling people to him.
Is there a better?
Sick.
I mean, that's what I aspire to be one day.
And Sal, look at this.
I still got a figure.
I got all his years.
I got the 1975 or 1979 one when he was close to the Thunderlips at 82.
And then I got the Japanese edition, which you like very much.
I fucked with that one, dude.
Then I got the WCW.
I got the 1985.
No, actually the limited edition 1986 Coliseum edition that is a remake of the LJN one that
it was very, very hard to find.
If you could find that right now, you had about almost $200.
Just letting you know.
So look in your little toy box and you'll see.
This is all gibberish to me.
I don't even know what's happening.
What's being said.
I'll show you a picture of it.
It's beautiful.
Brandon, is there a better entrance in wrestling than when John Cena came back in 2008 to the
Royal Rumble after he tore his pick, dude?
He came back early.
I have to see that one again.
It's been so long.
But I remember the most epic one.
Did I just alt-tism Brandon right there?
That's not even LJN.
I'm trying to show you all LJN.
They're trying to show me Mattel.
This one right here, the black card.
How dare they, man?
Damn.
Hold up.
That's a bed.
That's got to be a bed because if not, that's a fucking steal.
Brandon's about to get lost.
Okay, we back.
I'm sorry.
Dude, he's in the black card.
Listen, the black card is the biggest... If you find a black card, you're going to get
almost $1,000.
A black card?
Yes, the black card from the LJN.
This is late 80s, 1988 to 1989 when they ended it.
Only $1,000?
What's the black card, though?
Is it inside this thing?
Oh, no.
This is the black card right here.
See?
The original card is this, this blue one.
You get that black one.
You in there.
Okay.
Damn, dude.
Yeah, man.
Good times.
I need to hear the rest of this story.
We don't know anything about this story, but it's interesting and I want to hear about
it.
Go ahead.
Yeah.
There was a crime that was committed.
I went to UAH.
Dom currently goes to UAH.
Everybody in Huntsville knows what it is, University of Alabama in Huntsville.
Huntsville gang charges.
Let's go.
More like the charges, but it's not funny.
In 2010, a woman who worked for UAH, she was a professor in the biology department.
She applied for tenure and then a year, she got rejected.
They did not accept her bid.
A year later, she went to a department meeting and at the end of the meeting, she took out
a handgun from her purse, shot six people, killed three of them.
It's wild.
They made national headlines and all.
Were they staff or students?
It was staff.
It was all the biology department.
It was in the Shelby Center.
And she just went in there.
Yeah, that's crazy because we're in that motherfucker.
She just said, pop, pop, pop.
Yep.
Six people.
Damn.
I wonder what kind of gun it was.
It was a Ruger.
The Ruger?
P94, something like that.
P98?
I saw it in the article on the New Yorker, which is a great read by the way, if you like
this kind of shit.
It's wild.
All right.
So what was it?
But, yeah.
Shit, where was I?
Okay.
So she shoots up the meeting and everything and she gets apprehended by the police.
They take her into custody.
They're holding her in jail, awaiting trial.
And then the Huntsville Police Department gets a call from a Boston Suburb area police
department.
They were like, hey, this might be relevant to the case.
She shot and killed her brother back in the day.
Damn.
Wild.
Never faced any charges for it.
They describe what happened with her brother was like their father or one of their other
brothers died.
And during the wake, somebody came and robbed their house, like just rents their house while
the valuables fucked up thing to do.
But they get back, the brother's like enraged.
Like he's so mad.
He goes and buys a gun from like a sporting goods store in the area, a shotgun.
And the mom and her right there, Amy Bishop, they don't like it.
They're like, we don't want you to have this gun in the house or whatever.
And a few days pass and the dude comes back and Amy has the gun and she's walking down
the stairs and she's like, hey, I got, I put a shell in this.
I don't know how to unload it.
You know, can you show me?
And the mom and the brother are in the kitchen and the mom's like, well, don't point it at
anybody.
And she like turns it around to show her brother and pulls the trigger, shoots him point blank
in the chest, dies.
He was 18 years old.
Damn.
Yeah.
But the mom's the only witness.
She fled the scene.
The mom?
No, no, the sister fled the scene.
Her.
She fled the scene.
And the, the, the mom calls the police or she calls the police or something.
And there wasn't enough conclusive evidence to prove that it was murder.
And the mom testified in her favor saying that it was an accident, that it was just
like a freak accident.
Kind of hard to believe now given what happened.
But so that happens.
And after a little, a few years after that, she has her first child.
I think she ended up having four kids, but the first child, dude, she named him Seth
after her brother.
And the baby is born on the same day as her brother.
Dude, there's some Ouija board shit.
Creepy, dude.
Creepy.
And she writes three books.
She publishes three books.
And in one of them, the main female protagonist has a son and names him after somebody who
she loved that died.
And she's worried that the son is going to grow up to be like the guy that died.
So she's like, uses these three novels and frames it as this fictitious narrative in
this story that happened, but it's actually what happened in real life.
And then another one.
This bitch crazy.
She's wild, bro.
She was a PhD graduate from Harvard.
She got a PhD from Harvard in neurobiology.
Get the fuck out.
So she's smart and crazy.
She was Northeastern undergrad, Harvard doctoral student with a neurobiology PhD.
Crazy.
But then people start shitting on her.
In the article, they're like, she was the weakest candidate for a doctoral student we've
ever seen.
But she did have a PhD.
And in the other books, her husband never worked.
He was kind of like a bum.
He had odd jobs here and there.
And she was actually quoted as saying he was too smart to work.
Kind of weird to say.
But in one of the books, the main protagonist, her husband is like the character in the book
describes her husband as a limp, bed loving loser.
She talking shit through her books.
And he works at Radio Shack actually in the book, which is crazy to think about.
And it doesn't get any less crazy, dude.
In 2002, she goes to an IHOP with her son Seth, the one that she named after her brother
that she killed.
They run out of, what do they call it?
The little chairs, the high chairs for the babies.
Yeah, high chair.
Yeah.
And they give the last one to this other lady and Amy Bishop becomes enraged.
She carons out, bro.
She's like, we were here first.
And the manager comes.
They leave, like she has to leave.
She goes and punches the other woman in the face.
Not even the one who gave it to her, just the one who got it with her child, like punches
her in the face.
Pulled a pin.
She over here punched a people in the face.
Did she win?
Who won?
Well, I think she kind of just sneak.
Yeah.
You don't expect that.
She kind of sneaked her bro and then just left.
And that was while she was at Harvard.
And they were just like, oh, she's under a lot of stress.
She's a PhD student.
Things happen, which is wild.
It's a violent crime, dude.
And so that happens.
And then in 2003, a year later, she starts working at UAH.
And seven years go by, 2010, she applies for tenure, doesn't get it, commits a mass shooting
at the department meeting.
And the way the article describes it is like she waits till the meeting's almost over.
She reaches in her bag.
She's sitting next to the head of the department, pulls out the pistol and puts one right through
his head.
She kills him instantly and then turns the gun on another professor, on another professor,
shoots six people.
Now they interview somebody who was in the meeting that survived, who was like her best
work friend.
But in the article, she admits like, yeah, I voted against her receiving tenure.
Like students complained about her.
She was very hard to work with.
She didn't do any research and publish articles.
And UAH is a research-based university.
Just a lot of complaints against her.
And I wonder why.
A lot of complaints against this woman.
And so she knew that that other lady didn't like voted against her receiving tenure.
They had talked about it.
But they had conversations after that about like, she was like, oh, my professional life
is over.
And the woman is like, no, it's not.
You just got to find your fit.
You got to find a place where you can excel in.
The lady, the best friend, dove under the table when the shooting started.
She dives under the table.
And at this point, six people are bleeding out.
Three of them are dead.
And she says that she crawls out from under the table and flings her arms around Amy Bishop's
legs and looks up at her and is like, please, you know my children.
You know I have a family.
Don't shoot me.
Please don't kill me.
She said she looked her dead in the eyes, raised the gun up, and pulled the trigger,
but it jammed.
Damn.
It jammed.
And so the lady like runs out in the hallway.
She follows her and keeps pulling the trigger, but it's just not firing.
Like some cold blooded shit.
Man, hell no.
She went to the bathroom, washed off the gun, took her blazer off that had all the blood
on it, put it in the trash can, went into the lab downstairs and asked a grad student
who was studying in there, hey, can I use your phone real quick?
She calls her husband and is like, hey, I'm finished.
The meeting's over.
And he comes to pick her up.
But at that point she got arrested.
Like the police apprehended her.
And heartless, bro.
Souls.
Hell no.
She said she kept on shooting but the gun jammed.
That's an asshole right there.
Just followed her pulling the trigger.
Look in this bitch's eyes.
Where she at now?
I see it.
She's still in jail, right?
Yeah, she found God.
Good.
Yeah, right.
That's what she said.
That's what she says in the article.
Because the article's from 2013.
This happened in 2010.
Look that article up.
If she ever gets paroled.
It's, look up the New Yorker.
Just keep that and then New Yorker.
I can't believe that happened in UAH too.
That's fucking wild.
Wild as shit.
And this, that's it.
Look at the fucking painting they made of her, dude.
She looks like Javier Bardem in No Country for Old Men.
It's insane.
Shoot, likes them too, I guess.
That's a fucking Anton Shagura right there.
You remember Chocolate Factory?
Scroll down a little bit, Brandon.
I want to find that part.
Scroll down.
Moriarty is the best friend's name.
Moriarty, let's go down here.
And back down.
Oops, too far?
Keep going?
Yeah.
See, I'm gonna stop.
People screamed, duck for cover.
Moriarty dived under the table with gunshots ringing out above her.
She flung her arms around Bishop's leg and screamed, Amy, don't do this.
Think of my daughter.
Think of my grandson.
That's, that's.
Bishop looked down then turned the gun on Moriarty.
Click.
Moriarty in terror stared at the gun.
The weapon had jammed.
She crawled past Bishop into the hallway.
Bishop followed her repeatedly squeezing the trigger.
That's insanity, dude.
That's ridiculous.
Dude, that's the evil right there that you don't come across.
That's evil, man.
But this was like huge national news.
And in the like, this was 2013.
So, you know, Columbine was 14 years previous or Sandy Hook happened this same year.
Oh, did it?
2010.
Yeah.
I don't know if it had already happened, but it happened or no, that was like a couple
of years.
Like who gives a fuck?
But not like that.
Sorry.
It's not important to what I'm trying to say.
Mass shootings weren't like a crazy phenomenon.
Yeah.
Pretty.
They were happening by this point.
But it made national news headlines because it's one of the it's not very often that a
woman commits a mass shooting.
Yeah.
Is she like one of the only ones?
I mean, I don't know any other ones.
I don't know of any other one.
I know women serial killers like poison your drinks because they're weaker.
Yeah.
But like a firearm?
Yeah.
Not, not common.
And I think the biggest lesson we learned about this whole story is don't buy a Ruger.
Yeah, don't do that.
But also you should.
I don't, I don't purchase firearms, dude.
So with the tenor, tenor is becoming the teacher, right?
Huh?
Tenor is one to be a teacher.
Tenor is like it kind of secures your position.
She was already a professor, but when you apply for tenure, you get like a retirement
plan.
It's kind of like, oh, it's hard to fire you.
Yeah.
You have kind of like a permanent spot.
Yeah.
Wow.
She's crazy.
I mean, if she wasn't that crazy and somebody else came in there, we would be covered.
I would want to be in her class.
But for this situation, no, that's fucked up.
Damn.
It's a good take.
I can't believe this.
I want to.
That hurts.
She was so, it sounds like she was aiming for people.
Yeah.
No, she was, it was solely just for revenge.
That's messed up.
Cause she was pissed.
So do you think she would have killed more if the gun didn't jam?
Yeah.
Oh yeah.
I mean, she tried to kill the lady.
But she was after her because she knew she didn't vote for.
Well, everybody else is just under the table or screaming like, yeah, she was standing
in the doorway.
Nobody could get past her.
When the lady jumped out from underneath the table and grabbed her legs, it was like, please
don't shoot me.
And she was like, wow.
Damn.
How could you do that?
It's insane, man.
Dude, I was reading this and I just could not fucking believe it, dude.
Cause I've been in Shelby.
And I'd heard people talk about it, but I didn't know how deep this fucking went, dude.
I had no, I never even heard anybody talk about it.
Me neither.
Punching the lady at IHOP.
Yeah.
Come on, man.
Killing her brother.
And then the same day, it's weird, man.
I wonder what her kids think.
That's going to be a big ass movie.
She has four kids.
She has four of them.
So you got to monitor those kids because if they have any kind of crazy that she has,
it can get sexy and get weird.
Yeah, it can.
But my question.
What?
I agree.
Okay.
Sexy is, I mean, crazy is sexy, but not too, you don't want to get too crazy killing people.
You don't want to have a mass shooter sexy.
No.
You can't deal with that.
She might kill you.
She's going to, not might, she will kill you.
Oh yeah.
Yeah.
I mean, and she doesn't kill like most women.
She went with a gun.
Cold fucking blood.
Violent, bloody, messy.
Just outright cold hearted shit.
And had somebody begging her to not to kill her and still said, no bitch, you should have
voted for me to get tenure.
Yeah.
That's wild, bro.
You know my kids.
She's like your tenure ends here, dude.
That's insane.
But the people, the people I was around that I talked to when I first read this, they were
like, oh, well maybe she did accidentally kill her brother.
And then that's what changed her.
I don't think so, man.
No.
Like she, she, it was real sketch.
Go back to her pictures of her.
Yeah.
You can tell by looking at them.
Yeah.
These eyes.
Let's look at her eyes.
Let's go back y'all.
Come on.
She was having, she was a little crazy, bro.
Okay.
I'm going to have to get over here to the rugger.
Her name was Amy Bishop.
Hate guns, man.
Yeah.
This is like, go to her and her husband.
Her and her husband.
Or whoever that guy is.
I think that's her husband.
He look crazy as damn.
That's the guy that works at Radio Shack, I think.
He makes me angry to look at it.
Like Forrest Gump, isn't he?
Scroll down.
Let's see.
That's actually, I think that's something that they invented that they were like trying
to sell.
What they're holding.
I'm like, wait, what is that?
Please don't.
Is that from the TV show?
Oh God.
They made it.
Man, it makes sense.
That's a terrible wig.
That's awful.
I don't.
That's bad.
That's bad all around.
Yeah.
There's nothing great about this.
The lighting.
Oh, now that, look at that.
Look at that.
That's crazy.
Look at her.
Click on that picture where they're putting her in the car right above that one there.
You got a lot of them.
Damn.
Yeah.
That's great.
That's when she got arrested.
Or in court.
Mom from Malcolm in the Middle.
Oh yeah.
There's so many scenes she looks like in this picture.
Oh dude.
That demon.
That's a demon.
You can kill people like that.
See, you just need to put these people down because you can't let, if there's no way she
can go out back to society.
You can't recover from that one, man.
You killed, I mean you killed three people then.
You killed somebody years before that.
You punched a lady in the eye.
You have a history of violent and sporadic outburst.
You're a danger to society.
She killed her brother on purpose.
She killed her brother.
Oh, of course.
That didn't change her.
You don't point blank shoot somebody with a shotgun.
When they're telling you stop playing with that, don't point at that somebody.
Yeah.
And it wasn't like, they just didn't have any witnesses.
I mean the mom was there and was like, it was an accident.
The mom wants to believe it's an accident.
Oh, dude.
You know, nothing more than the mom wants.
In the article, she was still like, she just snapped.
The hell is this?
That's what she said?
Yeah.
I think that was after she had, you know, shot up the meeting.
Wow.
This is a year before.
You can tell she's crazy in this picture too.
That's the winter of 2009.
I mean it's crazy.
I mean that, wearing that haircut, she gets you nine to life.
Oh yeah.
You should be scared.
You should be able to fucking just pull that off.
You see that.
Oh shit.
Man, crazy shit.
So what else happened?
Man, well, I mean on 4th of July, I went to work and came home and then I don't know how
this happened, but my key fell out of my pocket and I got locked out of my house and my mom
was gone.
My uncle was gone.
Nobody was there.
So for like two to three hours, I'm literally outside with a credit card just clawing at
the door, trying so hard.
And then people on the phone like, Brandon, man, first somebody get a locksmith, then somebody
like go to your neighbor, but me, you know, which this made me feel better about myself
because I realized I'm like a warrior, man.
I'm not going to give up and try to get somebody else.
No, I kept doing it until my phone literally was overheated.
Like I said, I need to get somewhere cooler and there was nowhere else to be cooler.
And that was literally like my neighbor.
So my dad called my neighbor and then he came over and literally saw me.
You literally see me laying there just trying to claw slowly.
You're on the ground?
Yeah, it's literally sitting on the ground trying to get into this door with this credit
card.
And then he was like, damn, how long, man, I've never seen you sweat like that before,
Brandon.
You know I sweat.
But dude, I was sweating so horrible.
I was hiding.
He's like, we're going to have to get you a doorknob or something, man.
This ain't going to work.
And because he tried it.
So then we.
Yeah, you know, you know, the door does it.
Wait, how were you locked out of the house if it doesn't have a doorknob?
No.
So I'm saying the doorknobs locked so I can't open it.
I'm trying to pick it with a what's that thing?
Did it have a devil to know?
No, because we couldn't get in this house.
There was no way because nobody was there.
Can we can we backtrack a little bit?
Yes.
Why was your phone hot?
Because I was like I had it because it was hot outside.
It was like almost 100 degrees.
I feel like it's nine years old.
So you didn't have a porch or a cover.
No, I got an XR like that old one.
Huh?
I got the iPhone XR.
Oh, no, no.
I'm saying you don't have a cover to your porch.
Oh, yeah, I did.
I eventually put it over there, but I was trying to talk and get it.
I was like, yo, what should I do?
He was calling a lot of people outside.
And then like people kept sending me a bunch of things.
So then we went to Home Depot and got a new door and we just got a hammer and just boom.
We broke that bitch off and it came off very easily.
So this was good that we did this.
You didn't just wait for somebody else with the keys?
No, no, because, dude, dude, I would have had to wait like a couple of days because they
weren't like when I called my mom, she's like, oh, you're right.
You're on your own son hung up.
Damn.
And shit.
So I'm just like, dude, I literally got stabbed in the bushes trying to break in my window.
I couldn't because they're all locked.
So I was like, fuck.
Every window was locked?
Yes, every window was locked.
So I was just stuck out there heated in my work clothes.
And then eventually we busted the door knob and we got a new one.
I'm sure Jake has a lock picking kit somewhere.
Without a doubt.
You know how much it costs though to get your door unlocked from a locksmith?
Almost $200.
But it sounds like your house was first of all, extremely easy to break into.
Oh yeah, not anymore because we replaced that door, but because it was a whole door.
No, that's the door.
The door knob.
You guys got a deadbolt?
Deadbolt.
What's that?
The top lock, the big lock.
Oh yeah, we have the big one.
Thankfully, that one was unlocked.
We don't lock that because you have to have another key for that one.
Man, you should just go to a minute key at a Walmart and make just a lot of coffee.
Oh, I did.
I actually made two.
Hold on, let me show you.
I'm very excited about this one.
Look, I made this Star Wars one.
Then I got the Deadpool one too.
Hell yeah.
I'm so out on it.
Hell yeah.
Now I gave my mom her key.
She wasn't happy about that.
She was like, I want the one that blink with the light.
So I'm sorry.
I didn't even tell me.
She wanted one that flashed light.
I thought I heard you say something very different.
There's one that you press.
It's like a flashlight that they had.
You didn't tell me.
I'm sorry.
I didn't even tell you.
I'm sorry.
There's one that you press that's like a flashlight that they had.
There's a flashlight key that if you press the button, the light comes on.
I thought you were talking about a key fob for a car that unlocks your door.
I wish, man.
My car can't do that.
I got to lock them all individually.
Press them all down, pull them all up.
Plus my back trunk don't even lock.
I shouldn't be saying this out here.
But yeah.
People are going to know which car it is, Brandon.
That's a sticker.
Dude, somebody broke in at the VBC already once.
They found it out.
I had some shoes.
I was trying to sell this small Patrick Starr shoes, a size five or six, I found at the Frifft
store.
When I was trying to sell it, man, I was doing security for this show called, this band called
Ghost, which people say it was kind of like a devil type thing.
I don't know, man.
They said it was something like that.
And dude, it was crazy as fuck.
There was people outside.
There was this girl that was acting like she was possessed on the ground, roaring while
the police was trying to-
She was having an overdose.
Yeah, probably.
She was not possessed.
And I was just watching like, damn, people are acting crazy.
Then I go to my car and they stole my shit.
So I couldn't sell it.
And then they stole my scale too.
I had a kitchen scale in there, man.
Oh man, for the stuff I sell on eBay.
Sell figures.
Like toys.
Oh, to like weigh it to ship?
Yeah.
Yeah, that's one way to use it.
Man, Brandon, you are like the definition of self-incrimination.
Yeah.
Brandon would have admitted to a crime he didn't do without a doubt.
Just sitting there, did you?
Oh man, I don't remember.
I don't think so.
Man, did I?
You can have video evidence he wasn't there and he was still-
Well, maybe I was in the peripheral view.
He calls the cops.
He's like, there's a girl getting possessed.
They stole my Patrick Starshoe's and my scale that I used to weigh the stuff I sell on eBay.
Oh yeah, I told them too.
It's a bad day, dude.
I did.
I called up, I was like, yo, they stole my shoes and stuff, man.
My scale.
So, what are we gonna do?
And they're like, man, I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
They didn't do nothing.
Of course, they didn't.
I know they can't do nothing to you.
Lock your door next time.
It was just a back trunk.
They must have crawled through there.
It's a lot of stuff in my trunk, so I applied them for that.
At least they have tenacity to get through.
Man, they probably got high in my car and all that shit.
They were getting high too.
You think they jerked off in there?
They did.
Without a doubt.
That's all right.
Without a doubt.
That's all right.
Oh my gosh.
I don't know if he wants me to say his name, but there's a comedian who has the funniest
story he told me about when he was in college.
A homeless man broke in his truck and jerked off in there.
And that was over ten years ago.
And still to this day, if it gets hot enough, you can smell it.
Damn, man.
And he's like, he had to explain to his wife after they got married.
She's like, were you doing something in here?
Did you masturbate in your truck?
Are you serious that bad?
Yeah.
And he was like, no, I was this homeless guy from when I was in college.
It's that fucking, that's some stank.
Yeah, that's horrible.
I mean, he might have went multiple rounds with himself in there and just embedded it.
Oh, ass cheeks just on the fucking leather or the cloth.
You know it.
He probably didn't even shave too.
At that point, it doesn't matter if it's leather or cloth, bro.
Your car has been molested.
That's sad.
All right.
Well, that's all for us today.
That's good.
We learned a lot.
I'm happy.
Yeah, we gave AJ a great intro.
Yeah.
Murder, jerking off.
How to get into your house.
Yeah, man.
If you have a hammer or a brick, you can get into your house anytime.
I'm just saying, man.
I'm sorry.
You can break it down.
Or a key, man.
I wanted to kick it in, but no, you can't.
Don't kick the door.
All right.
We got AJ O'Leary coming right after this.
Oh, yeah.
This week's featured comedian.
You know what I've never seen anyone in a ski mask do?
Ski.
Even if I saw someone skiing in a ski mask, I'd be like, you're going to rob someone later.
Tell me you're going to steal those skis at least.
My little peace of mind.
The next question I have for y'all.
Y'all know who Peter Dinklage is, right?
Game of Thrones actor.
Sure.
If you're not familiar, Peter Dinklage, very famous actor.
He's four feet, five inches tall.
All right.
Name is Peter Dinklage, four foot five.
Do y'all think Peter Dinklage changed his name to sound more like a midget?
Like his name was Peter Longfellow.
We got to introduce.
We do have to introduce.
Today, we have a very special guest.
Dude, we're on a fucking streak of having out of towners.
Now this guy is somebody we've been trying to get on the podcast for a while.
He kept ducking the smoke.
Ducking a lot.
But he's here now, dude.
He's fucking here.
He's the host of the funny business comedy showcase at Kerrigans in Birmingham.
He also does the gray bar on Tuesday nights and open my cold nulls who will be on the
podcast next week or we'll shoot him.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
We'll see.
He's coming on, dude.
He's a writer.
He's a comic.
He's a fucking hell of a guy.
I love him.
He's gay.
It's AJ O'Leary.
Hey, thank you for coming on, brother.
Oh, thanks for having me, dude.
Not gay if you're watching Mom and Dad.
Not gay.
Up for interpretation.
We like to fuck around.
We gave JJ a little one too many screwdrivers, so I want to keep feeding him.
Oh, I love it.
I love it.
Just for you.
I'm like a fucking handyman.
I got so many screwdrivers.
Yeah, we screwed them good, man.
We screwed them up.
Well, you know, you could have said it a different way, brother.
We didn't have to say we screwed them.
Please don't say that.
My grandma will kick me out of the house.
Don't give her another reason, man.
Hey, so how you...
You're from Birmingham, right?
You're a Birmingham comic?
Yeah.
I mean, I live there now.
I'm from North Carolina, but yeah, I've lived in Birmingham a few years.
You're from Calackey, huh?
Yeah, man.
Yeah, near Asheville.
When did you move to Birmingham?
In two and a half years ago.
Oh shit, so you're new.
Damn.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Oh shit, I didn't know that.
I thought you were just born and raised there.
No, I have family in Birmingham.
I have some cousins, but you know, I'm a newbie.
Hell yeah.
Wait a minute, dude.
What?
Wait a minute, bro.
What happened?
Birmingham, Southern, dude.
Is that not where you went to college?
I went to UNC Chapel Hill.
So that joke I've been saying for the past two months doesn't make any sense at all?
Well, I kind of just, I wrote, I'm a journalist and I wrote about them closing.
So I was like, oh, I guess, oh, he read the story.
It's getting around.
All right.
You know, no, I've never read anything you wrote.
I thought you went to Birmingham Southern this entire time.
Actually, I have read some things you wrote and I'm tired of this shit because we got
to call him out for what he wrote, dude.
First of all, AJ O'Leary, you've heard it here on the Clown College Comedy Podcast first.
He's anti-central and South American immigrant.
He's also pro-child labor and I have the evidence to prove it, dude.
Oh boy.
May 21st, 2009 article from the Blue Ridge Now titled, Immaculata student is principal
for a day.
A fifth grader.
They made him principal of the entire educational institution for an entire day, dude.
Solid.
Okay.
So, I think, actually, 11 year old AJ O'Leary was quoted as saying, I think it's kind of
cool.
Wow, man.
He thinks child labor is kind of cool.
Damn, Shane.
Is that what you're into?
What do you have to say about this?
That is what they would have asked a fifth grader about.
I didn't know I was principal for a day.
Wow, this is a real walk down memory lane.
No, you weren't shit, dude.
They just asked you.
Oh, dang.
You're a classmate.
Hunter something.
Oh, Hunter Bickford.
Yeah, he was principal for a day.
Wow, okay.
AJ O'Leary, 11 year old version, was quoted as saying, I think it's kind of cool.
And that's all you said.
But not like very cool.
It's kind of.
It's a little cool.
Yeah.
Sometimes they need to work with kids.
For the betterment of us.
You know what?
I will actually go on the record as saying I am for child labor because my parents ran
an old timey general store and we started working.
They had us like behind the counter.
That's it.
When we were like nine and 10.
So my parents used us for child labor.
It worked out.
Did you get paid for it or allowance or what?
Yeah, we got paid for it.
You got paid for it?
Yeah.
Under minimum wage though, right?
I think it was minimum wage.
I think it was.
You really got minimum wage?
Yeah, I was getting.
What is the minimum wage when I was like 10?
And Chimney Rock, North Carolina.
It might have been $7 at the time.
That's pretty decent.
Man, that's not bad.
That's what branding is paid now.
Oh yeah.
And I was in child labor too.
When I started at 14, I know that that makes you happy.
That's more comfortable now.
Yeah, it's more acceptable now.
Yeah, it was good.
I was in middle school.
I only got it.
Dang.
It's only acceptable if you work for T-Mu, man.
Yeah.
Oh, I knew it.
That's true.
So what was your household like growing up?
Two older sisters and my parents ran an old timey general store, Bubba O'Leary's general
store, as you know from your research.
Catholic school.
There we go.
Small town.
Andersonville High and Immaculata Catholic School.
That's right.
You have a population of 140 in Chimney Rock and that's only 14 people of color.
That's a 10% ratio.
It's not very good.
Not very good.
There's only 114 people?
140.
140 people?
Jeez.
140 people of color.
Tiny.
I didn't know that stat either.
I knew it was around 100 people.
We got the info, man.
Dang.
Wow.
You learned something new every day?
How big was your graduating class in?
Like 20?
I went to school 30 minutes away in Hendersonville.
So it was like 180 people.
Oh, okay.
Decent.
So a decent size.
Yeah.
It was just like a normal small high school.
Bearcats, man.
Oh, you have a joke about that.
I do have a joke about that.
Notice how these guys didn't remember.
I know a joke I like.
Foodies.
See?
Oh, I forgot about it.
Yeah.
Jesus.
Dang.
You guys know my whole act.
I did stop telling that one.
Yeah, I like it though.
Oh, thanks, man.
I love how it divides the room, man.
Which is always the goal.
Yeah.
It's always the goal because it's such a, you know, it's silly.
But people are like, what the fuck are you talking about?
Yeah.
Who's calling people fat?
Yeah.
I'm like, put your burrito down.
Thank you, man.
We had enchiladas today.
Yeah.
Put your burrito down and cut it up like a man.
Put your burrito down and pour sauce on it.
I like that, man.
Pour that sauce on it.
So AJ, you worked on an Alaskan tour bus.
Yes.
Summer of 2018.
How was that like?
A tour boat.
The buses of the water, some say.
That's what I meant.
That's what's written in the notes.
Yeah, it's hard to find the words.
It's written boat.
Sometimes you know words get ahead of me.
I hear you.
What was that like?
Were you the tour guide?
Yeah.
So I was there for a summer.
I was 20 and we would go out and it was like being a waiter on a boat basically.
We would make chicken wraps every day with chicken that smelled like farts.
That's the best guy.
Yeah.
I'll say.
I don't know.
I disagree.
And then we would pass them.
It would be like a six hour, we would get there and clean the boat and then it would
be like a six hour tour and then people would get seasick and puke everywhere and we had
to clean it up and serve food and someone's always upset.
But then we would get to a glacier and people would freak out and be taking pictures and
we'd see an orca or something.
That badass.
And then we'd go back and I would get blackout drunk around a campfire with my coworkers.
That's pretty sick.
That sounds like a dream.
It was like maybe the greatest three months ever.
I'll take a controversial stance though dude.
That was fun.
What's so great about Alaska man?
There's a glacier.
A glacier?
There's somebody committing suicide.
The highest suicide rate in the US dude.
You know what's shocking?
I didn't witness any suicides there.
That's crazy.
Is it fake news then?
Is that fucking liberal media news that's trying to pass this shit around?
It's a very unpopulated state with a large amount of land dude.
So you know, if somebody kills herself in the woods.
That's true.
Did anyone hear the tree falling?
You know?
Anyways.
Did you have to fight off some polar bears and shit?
You know what?
I got up pretty, we saw some black bears like up pretty close, like 30 feet away and we were
like yelling to like try and scare them off and then they ran away.
So it was kind of not that exciting of a story, but they were close.
But you ain't scared of bears.
You're like fuck them.
Yeah.
I mean they, I didn't look scared.
I thought I played it pretty cool, you know?
Yeah.
What'd you say?
Yeah, I flicked it off.
Oh my gosh man.
I think a park ranger had said like, just yell, hey bear.
So we were just yelling like, hey bear.
It's very friendly, I feel like.
That's true.
Yeah, it's kind of a mixed message, you know?
Hey bear!
Whatcha doing man?
They don't know words.
That's awesome.
They don't.
They don't know words.
All right dude, I want to talk about this man.
Who you want to talk about?
Your anti-immigration.
Oh, South and South.
He's just coming in hot, dude.
Well.
Yeah, I just want to get down to it.
You actually referred to these South and Central American immigrants as Pest in a 2019 article
from Mountain Express, dude.
The nine banded armadillo is invading Western North Carolina, man.
Damn man.
How do you feel about those armadillos?
How has the problem progressed?
They're pretty cool.
What's the state of the issue right now?
Well, you know, speaking of, you know, we were talking about getting paid under the
table earlier.
No, I don't know.
Yeah, dude, it's weird.
Armadillos are in North Carolina and they're there to stay.
I don't think that's that weird, man.
Oh, they're here.
Yeah, they're just all dead.
I've never seen them live.
Yeah, they're here to stay.
I read your article.
I read the entire article on the nine banded armadillos.
I have some thoughts about what you said about climate change, but besides from that, salamander
biodiversity is not limited to the East Appalachian region.
Okay.
Alabama is the number one biodiverse state in the United States of America.
Oh, do you know that?
I didn't know that.
Now in terms of salamanders, Georgia actually has the most species with 32.
Whoa.
Yeah, dude.
Dang, dude.
You put on the glasses and you're like a different person.
Yeah, dude, it's a mask.
It's a mask.
I hate myself.
Yeah, we can talk about something normal now.
Hold on, hold on.
Armadillos.
Sorry, I didn't get you.
I didn't really know what to get.
That's why I just wanted to say that you were anti-immigrant.
Oh yeah.
He's been juiced up about it.
But I do have some puns that you wrote in the article.
Oh boy.
What the shell?
It's not in there.
Yes, it is.
Pull it up, Brandon.
It's in the note.
Hold on, hold on.
It's like when the article first starts, you have an image of a nine-banded armadillo and
the caption is, what the shell?
In all caps.
I swear it is, dude.
That's pretty great, actually.
I swear it is.
I'm glad that's in there.
And then you doubled down on the shell pun later.
So many sources, not in MLA format.
Dude, our editor, our research guy did not go to college.
You do not need to see my paperwork, man.
You're going to get on me.
See, I can't even say MLA.
There's going to be a lot of police reports, Bryn.
MLA?
My ass.
You just copy and pasted out hyperlink.
Yeah.
I'm just letting y'all know.
Oh yeah.
Well, I ain't going to lie.
There it is.
Hey, look, what does it say right under the picture?
What the shell?
That's incredible.
Armadillos roll into Western North Carolina.
You're like a legit author, dude.
Yeah, I'm, yeah.
I didn't even get paid for this article.
I was an unpaid intern at the time.
Sons of bitches.
Began their expansion throughout the US in the early 1800s.
How about that?
Rings a bell.
Rings a very familiar bell.
Hell yeah, man.
And then look, you double down on the shell pun.
Shell shocks.
Oh.
Call back, first of all.
Stand up comedy master class right there.
Oh man, I read this whole article on stage one time.
Did you for real?
I can see you.
Guys, dude, it definitely took me longer than five minutes to get through this piece of shit.
Yeah, dude.
Jesus Christ.
I'm sorry, AJ.
It was very good.
I actually really liked it.
I do have some feelings about what you said about climate change and the salamanders,
dude.
I like it.
What the fuck are you guys keep on talking about?
It's our armadillos.
Salamanders are in there, dude.
It's kind of a salamander or some shit?
No, no.
I mean, I don't get why you guys keep on talking about armadillos.
Kind of salamander.
Because they're both animals.
I guess I talked about it in the article.
I didn't actually even know.
But in there, you consulted an expert, Reynolds, I believe.
I don't remember his first name or her.
Let's see.
Let's keep going down.
Marching on.
Ooh.
Uptainted.
Armadillos.
I also like how you put this getting hot in here.
Somebody's going to be like, what you mean it's getting hot?
Although climate change can affect the distribution of many species.
I love your puns, man.
Oh, thank you.
Ooh, ooh.
I see it.
The salamander's right there.
Yep.
Look at that.
Of South Appalachia.
South Appalachia.
Oh.
I'm sorry.
I'm in my scholarly mindset right now, dude.
What is that?
Appalachia.
South.
What does it say?
Southern Appalachia.
OK.
One group, or one such group, is the various salamanders of Southern Appalachia.
A southern region, Reynolds.
Ah, fuck.
Ryan Reynolds.
OK.
Reynolds calls the global hotspot for salamander biodiversity.
Hey.
Cheers, baby.
Come here.
Thank you, man.
Let's cheers.
Cheers.
Cheers to that.
Cheers to biodiversity.
You know, I don't fuck with hawks, if that helps.
I don't fuck with hawks.
Like, how he doesn't fuck with armadillos.
I don't fuck with hawks.
You don't like armadillos, man?
I don't dislike armadillos.
I don't care about them.
I have never had a thought about armadillos.
AJ has some very strong feelings about them.
That one time, I see them on the side of the road.
I just think, oh, damn, they can die even though they got the shield.
They can jump.
What were we talking about?
We didn't just cut because one of the cameras went out.
No.
We would never do that.
And it totally isn't propped up on a trash can, either.
That never happened.
If you said it did, we'll kill you.
This is the best fucking studio you've ever been in, right?
The best.
The only.
Thank you.
The best.
The only studio.
We're going to be putting on local news.
Oh, bring up the imagery.
Yes, let's show that image.
I really like that personally, man.
Because, dude, that set of hair you had on there really.
What were you talking about?
Let me.
You'll see.
Oh, who even knows?
Look right there.
So perfect.
Look at that.
Zoom in on that.
Enhance.
OK, enhance.
Where's the enhance?
Zoom on the left.
There we go.
We got it.
We got it cooking.
Yeah, dude.
Holy shit.
Look at that.
I told you.
I'm the guy.
I'm the guy on the right.
You want to take a picture of that?
Yeah.
Wait.
Interest rates.
You're going to be a brand new believer.
I almost did.
What's happening in the top right corner?
I was.
That's when Be Real was a bit.
I did a Be Real on stage.
Pretty cool.
Oh, that is cool.
Hell yeah.
That's cool as fuck.
That makes a lot more sense now.
What's a Be Real?
Well, first of all, you're 45 years old.
We'll explain this one.
Be Real was a social media app that was popular for a couple months.
Probably longer than that.
But it went off at the same time for everybody.
So if you had the Be Real app, it was like, it's time to be real.
And I know that because all my coworkers at Topgolf used to go like, guys, it's time to
be real.
And it was the worst.
And you would get a notification.
You would go on and you'd take a picture of exactly where you were with the forward facing
camera and the outward facing camera.
And it's just supposed to be like a real social media.
People totally didn't wait till they were somewhere cooler than they actually were.
Okay.
Were you at like a meeting here or what's going on?
What's happening?
Not even a comedy show.
You just outed all these people.
I see Jonathan Silver on the left.
Oh shit, I see him too.
Oh shit.
It's just not Jonathan Silver.
Another bald black dude with a beard.
Love that man.
I thought it was him for a second when he said it.
All right, Jake's there somewhere.
Choose any of the women.
It's him.
That's right, dude.
Hell yeah.
So what was it like being on the news?
How many times did you do this?
They bring me on once a month.
Oh, you still go?
Yeah, yeah.
The newspaper I work at, we have kind of an agreement.
They bring us on to talk about articles.
So what's the last article you talked about?
It's very exciting.
Or the best one, whatever one, whichever.
Your favorite.
They all kind of are not interesting.
But the last one was just about less lawsuits go to trial today than in the past.
You ever try to crack a joke on that?
Yeah, that's good.
Actually, I'm going through a lawsuit right now.
Oh really?
Yeah.
Oh dang.
Accidentally killed somebody.
Vehicular manslaughter is what they're calling it.
Got out of the criminal charges.
That settlement will get you though.
He forgot to read me the Miranda rights.
So, got off.
Did his shoes fly off?
His shoes did fly off.
When you hit somebody at a very fast speed, the shoes fly off every time.
Whoa.
That's full fill out.
Three times has happened.
Nobody ties them right there.
People say I should stop drinking.
Bitches.
I feel like that could have been a separate issue.
Do you ever crack a joke on the news AJ?
No.
You ever?
I wish I had.
No, I want to.
Look at that stance though.
That's a serious stance.
Oh yeah.
Well, he's shitting.
I have.
One time the guy we were making, he was trying to banter before going live.
We don't go live, but before taping.
He just asked me what my rent was.
I just see this guy once a month and he was like, what are you paying rent?
I was like, I don't know.
What's your mortgage dude?
That's an odd thing to ask.
What just to talk about?
How much did you pay for that hair replacement in Turkey?
As you can see.
That's a strong part.
It's a strong part.
I don't think it's a purposeful part.
I think it's mandatory with his cut.
Is this the guy that you go in there with every day?
Pretty much.
I mean every month?
Pretty much.
What's his name?
Mike Doubberly.
I'm looking for him.
Before I find him, I'm going to be like, hey, what are you paying him rent?
Please.
He didn't tell me, so I'm glad I didn't tell him.
Don't you hate when people do that?
We were at Moody Monday, singing karaoke.
We're outside.
This guy comes up.
It's a group of, we don't know him.
He's like, hey, what do you guys all do?
He starts pointing at people and I'm fucked up because it's like one person's a scientist
for real.
The next person is an engineer.
They're like, what do you do?
I'm like, I go to school.
They're like, aren't you like 40?
I was like, yeah.
Yeah, but I still like go to school.
I just had to say that.
He never told us what he fucking did.
He went around the room and made everybody say what they did and then he didn't fucking
say anything.
He's just trying to get ideas.
First of all, Dom, Alcoholics Anonymous is not school.
That's more of a social club.
It's an extracurricular, actually.
More of a social club, yeah.
Good way to meet women.
It is, actually.
They're probably loose.
If they're there.
If they're going through withdrawals, they're probably not the most pleasant people to be
around.
They're trying to find something to fill the void and that void could be your dick.
Oh yeah.
That's right.
That's a good Twitter bio.
Brandon, don't you have some questions?
Yes, I do.
I have a question.
I see here.
Let me pull this up, man.
I'm glad that you came here today.
You used to play guard for your Hendersonville J.B. basketball team, right?
Yes, I did.
So you can play ball?
Kind of, yeah.
Okay, well, you want to be on my team?
When I play them, man.
I'm trying to build a team that's good.
Excuse me, you and Brandon versus me and J.B.
I would love to.
Thank you.
If we're playing other comedians, I can play basketball.
Oh, dude.
I mean, yeah, we'll be all right.
So you're the guard.
We could get a five on five game and record it for the Clown College.
Yeah, but you know, five on five, that means full court.
You have time to train.
You need to, man.
This is an intervention.
Yeah, but that's what I want, man.
What kind of shots do you do?
I mean, I'm like, no.
What?
No.
A little bit?
Mid-range turnaround jump shot fadeaway.
If you're taking it to the rack, I'm...
I am kind of take...
I wanted to take it to the rack.
I got kind of good at finishing around the rim, but I'm really slow, so it just doesn't
make sense.
It's like, if I'm already there, I can kind of do it, but I can't really get there.
You don't have the first step, quick first step?
No, not at all.
How do you get there then?
I never did get there.
What was your signature move?
What was your move?
You know what?
When I was a junior, I played one season of varsity.
I scored one basket.
It was senior night, and they put me in in the last five minutes.
Hell yeah.
I did a left hand layup euro step, scored.
Oh, damn.
Crowd went crazy.
Hell yeah, man.
And then with the euro, old James Harden over here?
My parents still tell that story at the dinner table sometimes.
It's all they have.
It's going to be good though, because I was in JV too, man, but back in the day, this
is when I was trash, ass, and fat, and very small.
It was horrible.
Dude, they used to smack it out of my hand and shit.
My family would be there.
I remember me and my friend, we were playing, he started crying.
I was trying to cheer him up.
Dude.
Why was he crying?
Dude, because we were playing so bad.
That's why.
Our whole family was there.
He wasn't used to it by then?
Dude, it was horrible.
We only had one dude, and he would run up and do those weird ass tricks and do that little
close to dunking, but he couldn't dunk thing.
Okay.
Yeah.
It's called a layup.
Yeah, but now, yeah, layup.
But now I can do it.
So me and you, we're going to go on the paint.
We're going to have to find a three point shooter though.
Yeah.
We're going to have to find three point.
Matthew Lumbra.
So Lumbra's on y'all team.
If you can shoot a three point.
So it's me, JJ, and Syfy then.
Oh, fuck.
Okay.
Versus you, AJ, or Larry.
And Lumbra.
Yes.
I feel like that's fair.
We'll see how it goes.
Can you guys play?
No, I'm terrible, but I'm big enough to get rebounded and shit.
I'll just push you.
I will foul you.
Okay.
That's fine.
So you will get fouled.
All right.
And we won't be calling it.
That's what we're doing.
Street ball, man.
Old fashioned street ball.
Yeah, man.
Anything goes.
Hey, man.
I'm from Chimney Rock.
Ooh, see?
Gay, gay.
Tell them what's up, dawg.
Yeah, gang.
CR, baby.
The 828.
It gets up like a chimney passing the rock, dude.
I didn't like it before I said it, dude.
But I still did, dude.
It's called perseverance.
It's what you want in a basketball player.
That's right.
So if the Birmingham team had a basketball team, who would be Dennis Rodman and why is
it Jeremiah Cotton?
Damn.
Should you tell AJ what you call him, dude?
Wait, talk about slave face?
AJ, he does have a very slave face.
We'll put a picture of him up right here.
Please, Alex, will you put a picture of him?
I'll say it's you.
We'll have it right here.
As you can tell, what I'm saying is how the temple's protruded, right?
Sunken cheekbones, temple's protruded.
Exactly.
It's phrenology.
And it's giving, you know what I'm saying?
He lives outside.
Maybe he has short capri pants on that are weathered at the bottom.
His name isn't helping.
And his name is Jeremiah Cotton.
He's a funny dude.
I love Jeremiah.
But he does have a slave face and I won't stand here and not say it.
And I won't stand here and not say it.
Damn.
You're not standing and you definitely said it.
So who else you got?
Who's the Bacchaljoy?
Who's the starting five of the Birmingham team?
And if you say Kenny's in there, dude.
No.
I'm not saying that.
I'm saying that.
Kenny's a dope boy.
Kenny knows who he is.
And Scott Easton called him melted ice cube.
Cole played high school basketball.
All right, so we're losing.
And then this guy, Miles Bryson.
I don't know if you guys have met him.
I don't even know if he played basketball, but he just is like probably six, maybe close
to six three and like an athlete.
He's probably in there.
Black or white?
Black.
Who else?
I'll put myself in there just cause.
Yeah, you got to.
You're point guard, right?
Point guard.
Yeah.
John Stockton on him.
That's right.
Are you white chocolate?
No, John Stockton.
John Stockton.
Yeah.
I don't have white chocolate in me.
Who else?
I don't even know who else it could be.
Apparently Chris Ivy played high school basketball.
That's a tall ass dude, right?
No.
He.
How can I?
He's the most immaculate man in comedy.
Chris Ivy.
No, I know.
Oh yeah.
Yeah.
He was, he was at Chattanooga, right?
I don't think so.
He's like, he.
You sure?
I don't know.
He was there at the Stardome while you were there the first time.
Yeah.
That's the same dude.
He was hosting the Micah JJs.
No, that was Steven Henry.
I have to say.
Anyways.
And our fifth person is, I have no idea.
Kenan Worthington.
Oh shit.
Just cause he's over six foot.
Yeah.
Podcast alumni Kenan Worthington.
It's like Bill Walton, isn't he?
You know what I mean?
Yeah.
Look like Bill Walton.
I can see that.
No, he does not look like him.
I get what he's saying.
Bill Walton.
Pull up Bill Walton.
Kenan Worthington.
The face only.
They just look like they could be related.
It looks like Jonah if anybody.
No dude, Jonah saved his life.
This is an older him right here.
Kenan, you don't look like him man.
That's Kenan's dad.
He does look like Rick Flair.
The one up there in the top second one, that looks like Jonah.
Jonah.
Yeah.
Not even.
That's Jonah right there.
It is pretty Jonah-ish.
Cause they both tall too man.
I see it.
That's Joe Magden.
Joe Magden.
Hell yeah, Magden them like the condoms.
They just have the same beard, you know?
Kind of where the wild things are.
Oh man, I love this show.
No cheek, all chin, beard dude.
I love it.
Hey man, to each his own.
Hell yeah.
If I was going to pick a starting five, nobody in this room would be honest.
You haven't seen me play.
I don't need to.
Damn man.
What about me?
Brandon would be on there.
Thank you man.
He's the best basketball player I've ever seen dude.
Yeah, yes I am.
Are you trying to convince the camera or yourself?
Both man.
Cause he's white chocolate, I'm dark chocolate.
We're going to be called the Brookie man.
What was it?
John Stockton?
And Carmelo?
Wait what?
I thought we were on the same team.
That's for some hell.
Oh, okay.
Oh we're doing a Birmingham game too?
He's got a Birmingham starting five.
Damn man, we're doing that too.
That's what we just talked about.
You didn't put Cotton on this.
For the last five minutes.
Breath doesn't.
I don't know, Jeremiah Cotton maybe he can play basketball.
I don't know.
I bet he can't.
But people will pick him because he's so big and strong.
But he's better at hitting bricks and making gravel.
That's more of his forte.
I don't think finesse comes into it.
Sure, sure.
There's raw ability dude.
You sound like John Stockton.
I don't even want to overly agree with him.
You guys are a hoot man.
You are a hoot AJ.
I loved AJ since the first time I saw him.
I was like I like this guy.
And every time I try to talk to him he doesn't talk to me.
He wouldn't come on the pod for like four months.
AJ would you please come on?
He's like, get away from me man.
It seems like nobody seems to really fuck with us at all.
But if after enough time and persistence we keep bothering people they come on.
There you go.
It's like Magic Johnson.
I met him personally too.
Brandon and Magic Johnson right here.
Hugging him like the Magic Touch man.
Thankfully that didn't happen.
He's a good dude.
He don't do that.
He got sexually assaulted.
No not by Magic Johnson.
Allegedly six times.
You can't afford that.
I was trying to write a joke about like how bad would it suck if you fucked Magic Johnson
and got herpes.
That would be a great story to tell.
That was fucking good.
It never works.
It's very funny off mic.
It's crazy how that shit goes huh?
I have a lot of jokes like this.
It's like why?
Why don't you guys find this is funny?
Dom why don't you say your signature joke that doesn't work?
Oh.
Alright so.
I was in the army right?
And you meet a lot of people in your army.
Good people, bad people.
I'm going to tell you about the bad ones alright?
So I was friends.
Well let's see I fuck up by saying friends.
I knew this one guy who you know he was a regular dude but he's in prison right now
for 30 years for rape.
And looking back on it you know I probably should have noticed something because he would
like grab girls arms and be very aggressive with women.
And the same thing happened with this guy who killed his whole family.
Now same thing hindsight you know 2020.
I should have noticed something because like it's like this.
One time we were talking he was like if my wife ever cheats on me I'm going to kill her
and the kids.
It's the subtle things.
It's the subtle things man.
First of all both of those are true.
And he didn't tell me he would kill his kids and all that shit.
But he's in prison.
You just said it was true then you were like nah.
No I mean he's in prison right now for killing his wife and his kids.
But you know what he's a bitch because usually when you do that Christmas wall you kill yourself
too.
That's just like the Japanese spear in their self and getting the hair cut.
That's a glass half full argument.
You have to kill yourself you kill your kids.
No other way around it.
I don't know.
But if you kill yourself you don't really answer for the crime dude.
So is that more bitch shit or should you kill the kids and then be like you know what I'll
go to prison.
No because he gets three fucking meals now.
He's sitting there playing spades with somebody when you offed your fucking child.
But he's also somebody's girlfriend and he has Kool-Aid on his hands.
You don't know that.
He might know El Chapo in there or something.
He was Puerto Rican of some sort.
I don't know which one he could have been Colombian he could have been any of these
but he was one of them.
He was definitely one of them.
I'm not sure which one.
Last name was Colbert.
I don't know if that helps.
I think I might know him as well dude.
It's very Puerto Rican last name.
Right okay so he is Puerto Rican.
No Colbert?
That's like a car isn't it?
That's half a coleslaw dude.
That's like Steven.
What's that stand up?
Colbert?
Oh I didn't know that.
Look up Colbert.
Maybe Col-barone.
Like that?
Yeah last name Orgin.
Orgin.
Let's find out what his name is.
Colbert.
Okay so it's German.
French.
French, English and Irish.
You couldn't get whiter if he tried dude.
Well they got a little German in it.
He wasn't white though.
Yeah luckily they've never had any white people in Puerto Rico.
Only Donald Trump when he threw those paper towels.
Oh yeah man.
AJ don't you love just saying crazy shit?
I do.
It's exciting.
I'm gonna be thinking about the guy who killed his family joke for weeks now.
Do you like it though?
Yeah that's great.
It's never got one laugh.
And I've said it at least five times on stage.
It's never even got a chuckle.
What the fuck is wrong with you?
I think if you, my answer to everything is just go super short with it.
Just be like, and it's still not gonna work.
But it's still awesome.
Like yeah I never saw it coming.
He said he was gonna do it and now he did it and he's in jail for it but I never saw
it coming.
It's a subtle thing.
How often do people follow up on their New Year's resolutions?
People never stick to those things.
Brandon do you have a joke like that?
Do I have a joke like that about killing?
No, no, a joke that doesn't.
What's one that I've, man my mind left me.
I can't think of one on top of my head but I know there is one in the vault somewhere.
Where is this at?
We're gonna go back in there.
I've got one dude.
Yes, why you do that?
This is how I got Dom to start doing the podcast.
I already know what it is.
I love it.
When I was in the fourth grade we went on a field trip to a local cave called Cathedral
Caverns.
I had a crush on this girl and we spent the whole field trip together.
We were like, we ate lunch together.
I gave her the butter finger out of my lunch.
It was a big deal, man.
It was a lot.
At the end of the tour you get to the end of the cave and they turn out all the lights
to mimic natural darkness.
I didn't know that they were doing it because I was talking to this girl.
I was definitely afraid of the darkness.
I threw an uppercut that Mike Tyson would have been proud of.
It connects with something.
I'm not sure what it is yet but then the lights turn on and she's on the floor.
The teacher sees and she's crying on the ground.
Out of instinct it's Etowah County, Alabama.
It was dark so I blamed it on a black guy.
I did throw him under the bus but at least it was the front of the bus.
That's good.
That's good eating right there.
That's a good joke.
You notice how AJ laughed more at the other one, dude?
It's almost like that one isn't more funny than it is fucked up.
I threw him under the bus but at least it was the front of the bus.
It's great.
I don't give a fuck what you're talking about.
That's a great line.
Yeah.
I gotta be honest.
I don't get it.
Rosa Parks, the front of the bus?
Yeah.
Rosa Parks.
Oh, okay.
Oh, that makes sense.
What?
Okay.
It's February.
It's been too long ago, huh?
You gotta brush up on your black history.
He was trying to cram study for Pride Month.
Exactly.
It hasn't even come up yet.
Crazy.
And Rosa Parks wasn't gay so she doesn't matter in June, Dom.
That's true.
But it's July now, motherfucker.
Yeah, that's true.
What is it now?
Hispanic Hispanic or what?
Let's see what it is.
Hispanic Hispanic.
There's a lot of months that just started coming up.
July, I think it's straight Pride Month.
Celebration, right?
There's no system.
July month celebration.
That's every other month.
National Fragile X Awareness Month.
What is that?
I won't deal with it.
I don't know what it is and I don't care.
Let's find out what it is.
Hold on.
Is that real?
Click on it.
It says what is the month July is celebrating.
Oh, okay.
Including grilling month?
I'm down with it.
Brandon, click on the first link.
Oh, that's a good one.
Disability Pride.
That's what it is.
Brandon, it's your month, baby.
Yeah.
Hot dog month.
It's your month as well.
That damn yell.
I do love a good Jimmy Jam.
Picnic month.
Hot dog month.
Ice cream month.
Let's go.
I fuck with that.
But Brandon, click on that first link.
I want to know what Fragile X is.
I feel like that's a genetic definition.
It's definitely something disabled.
Fragile X.
It says July shines a spotlight on the most common form of inherited intellectual disability.
What is Fragile X, though?
Brandon is actually technically Fragile X.
What does that mean?
We'll get you a panning about that.
You're one consonant away from getting canceled right now, Dom.
Chill out.
Let's see.
During the month.
What is the constant?
I don't even know.
The R.
Okay, so it says the syndrome is a mutation of the fMRI gene.
What is that?
That's a one, but that's fine.
We'll figure it out.
One, one.
While it is the most common form of inherited intellectual disability, it impacts men more
than women.
Some people may have the gene mutation, but you know, never shows signs.
What is it?
Oh, wow.
That's a later one.
It's not saying mild, severe symptoms of what?
Let's see.
Damn, they're not telling me.
They're just saying there's no cure for it.
Damn it, Brandon.
We're going to find a cure for you.
Hold on.
Let's see what Fragile X is.
What is Fragile X deficiency?
Come on, y'all.
Okay, a genetic that causes intellectual disability.
Oh, dude, Brandon.
It's just being retarded.
Wait, so this learning disabilities right here?
It's slow, yeah.
Dude, I got learning disabilities.
We know.
Damn, man.
Damn.
You look just like the guy in that picture.
No, I think this is whenever you're in special needs.
Oh, okay.
Okay.
Not special ed.
This isn't special ed.
There's a difference.
There's a big difference.
There is a difference, and we need to have an awareness month for that.
Yeah.
For which one?
For special ed versus special needs.
No, no, we don't need it.
It's all right.
Look, this is your month.
It literally is your month right now.
Oh, I thought this was... Oh, okay.
And we're going to celebrate it every time we come on this show, and every time we add
an open mic, I will be bringing up that this is your month, and they better fucking respect
it.
Yeah, I agree.
I agree.
I think it was a blue pin they had, little ribbon.
We're going to get that.
Oh, okay.
We'll get that for you, dude.
I'll get it tattooed on my back right now.
With your name in there on the ribbon.
See, we don't need that tomorrow.
No, dude, I love you, man.
I love you too, man.
I'll wear a blue polo or something.
Whoa, just calm down, dude.
Pride month was last month.
Okay, don't say it back.
So what's your joke that never works on stage that you love?
Joke that I... Man, I feel like I have a million, but I can't think of any.
What even would I want to say?
I don't know, dude.
I'm just going to have to think about it.
Don't worry about it.
We can come back.
We could just jump in no matter what we're saying and then say it.
I swear.
Cut us off.
It came to me.
Yeah, yeah, it just came to me.
It doesn't matter.
Then it's going to bomb here also.
You're like, oh, glad you remembered.
I'm going to be honest.
I do remember one thing.
I don't remember the joke, but I remember the situation because I told somebody before
I said it on stage.
They were like, what the hell, Brandon?
Because one time I did a thing about how I realize now that there's more situations
where the dude specifically in class, the girl teacher come up and be like, hey, man,
you want to extra grade?
Let's do this.
And then I made a joke basically clarifying how I was kind of like jealous.
I was like, damn, man, why weren't they doing this during my time?
Because I mean, I would appreciate it.
Well, you talking about fucking the students.
Yeah, I'm talking about me.
But I'm not talking about the teacher.
I'm talking about me.
I'm saying-
Why didn't you get sexually assaulted by a woman instead of a man?
Yeah, if that happened.
That's been well-as-tell.
Yeah, I was like-
I thought I could get you.
Because I was like, there was times when I would look and be like, damn, if only.
You know what I mean?
If only.
Because they would do something like one lady stick stuff in the bra and-
Well, explain that.
Don't pass over that.
I'm sorry to teach you, if you got in trouble, she would specifically open her bra, look
at you and stick stuff in there, right?
Stick what in there?
Anything.
Whatever.
What does that mean?
How is that a punishment?
Listen, if she took your phone, she's going to stick it in there.
You got a toy that you love so much, like if I had a wrestler or something, she's going
to stick it in there.
That was only Brandon.
That was only Brandon with the limited edition WWE Legends Hulk Hogan Japanese Wrestling
Alliance figure.
Oh, man, dude.
I would cry with that one, man.
I got the Chase edition, you know, the limited edition one with the, what is it?
He got the red and blue, but that's a different story.
But yeah, man, I used to, like one time I accidentally smacked a teacher.
I didn't mean to.
I accidentally smacked a teacher's ass one time.
I didn't mean to do it, though.
So I went to pick up my pencil and then I accidentally went up and her ass right there.
I was like, oh, man, I'm sorry.
I didn't mean to do it.
You look like an ax.
I didn't mean to do that.
Did you smack it whenever?
Yeah, it was tapped because the whole class was like, oh shit.
And then she looked back and was like, oh, that's Brandon.
That's all right.
What grade?
They can do whatever they want.
Oh, this is like eighth grade.
Eighth grade?
Eighth grade.
You were a teenager.
Yeah.
Eighth grade.
Good year.
That was not a good year.
It was okay.
What made it, what played into eighth grade being a good or bad year?
Man, it was, this was the year.
This was the last year I was fat.
This is when I realized that I was because I remember I asked him, I was like, am I fat
now?
Hell yeah.
And that's when I started basketball and tried.
So I would play every single day.
That's why I'm a little good because I would play every single day just to lose that weight.
And I did.
And I came back my freshman year and thought that everybody was like, oh my gosh, Brandon,
you lost all that damn weight.
No, man.
Everybody thought I did crack like the teacher who asked me about the crack head and shit.
And it was bullshit.
Like I swear.
You worked for it, dude.
Yes, I did work for it.
And they blamed it on crack.
So now I got to get muscular, I guess.
And I tried wrestling, which I love.
So let the Russell dudes, man, good shit.
Those women.
Okay.
Why did you say you don't have to say it?
It's like that's what Russell implied that it's your wrestling man.
Well, you wrestling everybody.
I wrestled men, women, children, beat up by a girl on wrestling.
Not even one.
I have horrible stories.
Oh, man.
Man, I felt bad.
I wrestled a special needs person.
So so it was like, they said, I don't know.
I don't know.
I wrestled a special needs person.
So so it was like, they slam the shit out of you, didn't they?
No, dude.
It was bad because it was senior night and my mom, my mom never came to any of my she's
German.
She doesn't do things like that.
I like support me.
But so she so she actually came to this wrestling match a senior night, but they didn't have
a they didn't have a person for me to wrestle.
And I was the best dude on the team.
And I was like, just give me anybody.
And they were like, well, this dude from JV and he was clearly something was wrong with
them, you know, and I could have went easy on him, but I beat him like 15 seconds.
I just slammed him on the mat and pinned him because, you know, he needed to he needed
to I think you should do that.
They should all be treated the same.
Everyone should be treated the same.
And why did you say they I was talking about the special needs.
That's what I meant.
But you know what I'm saying, wouldn't you if you were supposed to wouldn't you want
to be treated as everyone else?
Yes.
Yeah.
That's a good point, actually.
Yeah.
So I'm not just going to go there and play with them.
I'm gonna slam on the ground as hard as I can.
Just like I would if it was if it was anybody else and I'm gonna do like this and easy pin.
So it's done faster.
It's like when you kill an animal, you want to do it fast.
You don't want to drag it out.
Okay, but how when we say that the guy had special needs, to what degree?
Oh, no, no.
Yeah.
Brandon.
No, Burstin Brandon.
He had like he had a he had an affliction, you know, they make noises when you slam them.
I can't remember.
He makes a low tone.
That means he was this low.
But my move.
But don't you got don't you got a question for AJ about?
Yes, I do.
But before I do that, I want to tell you I want to tell you about that wrestling thing.
Listen, listen, you did the best thing ever, man.
Because you know, and like when I first started when I first started and they put me in that
verse and shit, I didn't know what I was doing.
You'd have the pros like seniors and shit.
And what they do is they let you down.
And once they realize they can let you down, they let you back up.
Take you back down.
Let you back up.
They play with you.
And then years later, I remember one time I did that.
Well, I didn't really do it.
What I did was let him up, slam the couple.
And then the dude was like, what's wrong with you?
You're supposed to keep letting them up and go down since he doesn't know what he's doing.
And I've always never followed that.
So when you do that, I agree with that.
That's what I would give me some nuts.
Air nuts.
You know what?
Let's give a round of applause for Don.
Slamming a wrestler with special needs.
He did right.
He did what he was supposed to do.
Thank you, guys.
I've always needed this affirmation on senior night.
I'm seeing it was on senior night.
I had to get my mom a rose.
Oh, what did your mom say about your performance?
She said, she said, was something wrong with him?
Damn, man.
She didn't say good job or anything.
Not anymore.
Yeah, but that's not usually how it is.
They should have given you a better opponent.
Hold on.
I love the German accent.
But you can't do like, I'm about to say crazy shit about Germans.
You can't.
They're very cosmopolitan.
That was insane.
That's a good accent.
It's not that crazy.
Does your mom have like a thick German accent?
No, she has it.
But it's not like I never noticed it growing up because it's just how she talks.
But it's not like that, like that hard until she starts talking to her family back home.
Then it's all kind of like, shit like that.
And I'm like, what were you guys talking about?
Oh, we're just saying happy birthday to each other.
I'm like, you guys sound like you were trying to kill each other on the fucking phone.
But it's aggressive.
It is.
It's very aggressive.
I believe it.
She doesn't like American whites.
Oh, dang.
OK.
Not a big fan of American whites.
What's the thinking there?
I don't know.
I just growing up, I never really thought of it.
And then like five years ago, I'm like, mom, do you got any?
Because I know she has white friends, but they're like European and shit.
I was like, you got any American white friends?
She was like, no.
I'm like, why not?
I'm like, you don't like them?
I heard they're fine.
This is verbatim what she said.
And I'm like, what do you mean you heard they're fine?
Like you whenever she was like, they just smile too much and say, how are you doing?
I'm like, yeah, they're nice.
She doesn't like the nice.
And that's why I support the 1924 National Origins Act.
We got to put a fucking quota on these people.
I'm sorry, Brandon, what was your question?
Because I saw in your notes or in these notes here, man, that you have an offer that you
like.
His name is Duke alum Tucker Max, right?
Oh, Duke alumni is a title.
Oh, he's a Duke alumni.
His name is Tucker Max.
And I was interested because you have he wrote a book called Assholes.
Assholes finish first, right?
I don't know who Tucker Max is.
You know?
Because I remember Assholes finish first.
I know Tucker Max was that guy who wrote all those kind of books back in the early 2000s.
Yeah.
Yes.
I have they have movies about one of them.
I can't remember which one.
Maybe this was a different AJ O'Leary.
It could have been.
Yeah, I'm not familiar.
But I supported it because I have a book.
Let me show you this book that I read or I used to read.
I quit reading it.
It's called Nice Guys Finish Last.
And what it's about is like they call you they call you to what's this word called a
simp or the beta or something like this.
It's like a Red Bull type thing.
Yeah, bad pill type thing.
And what you do is it's like they tell you they're like, oh, man, people don't like it
because you're too nice or something like that.
And I used to follow that and take notes.
I quit, though, because it's not it's not the stuff.
Ain't the right last time magazine.
OK, I'm a bad nice guys.
The hey, man, simp and ain't easy, you know?
It's not.
That's it.
We had to quit that.
Are you a simp?
Oh, hell no.
Are you a tricker or you trick?
It's called trick.
Kind of depends on the day.
Yeah, yeah, I'll trick.
I'm good.
I've been like that my whole life.
I'll buy you a book.
I'm going to bring my book.
If I'm going to get a sloppy blow job, what's the hot tour?
Yeah.
What's wrong with buying or something?
Yeah.
Nice dinner.
Sure.
If you're not getting that, you still got to go out on a nice dinner.
But then most of the time, you know, it's really nice.
You get that.
Hot tour.
Did you know she's coming into comedy, too?
Of course.
They say she's going to come.
Why wouldn't you?
This will be this will be forgotten about in two.
By the time this episode comes out, people won't even remember hot to a girl.
That's just how it goes.
Talk about AJ O'Leary.
Yes.
Yeah.
Yes.
So this means Jack likes you.
So he wrote you ran at least one five K, but you have zero bumper stick.
It's confirming this zero bumper stick.
Yeah, that's true.
How does he know what my car bumper looks like?
We have imagery.
He knows a lot of things.
Yeah.
That's the only genuinely concerning thing.
But you have some of the numbers on the wall in your apartment.
So you must have ran.
No.
What did he say?
I when I was in middle school, I wanted to be an Olympic marathoner.
My life goal.
And then I and then in high school, literally, I till I was 16, I wanted to be an NBA player
and I was not a good basketball player.
And I just was delusional.
Like, yeah, going to the NBA.
I love it.
Same here.
I love it.
I was same way with football.
Sometimes you just have to have that delusion.
Yeah.
You know what?
You never know.
You could have been the new Muggsy Bowles or something like that.
Could have been.
M.B.
He kind of looks like him.
Dude, listen, I'm on the same dude because I used to like in middle school because I
don't know why I used to get every NBA game.
I really wanted to be on it.
And I used to try out for the team every year.
And I always end up being a water boy.
And then like one time I was in the class or in the in the in the locker room and they
were like, I was like, damn, I just don't get it.
How come I can never be on this team?
And then he looked at me, put his hand on my shoulder.
He's like, listen, man, some people are meant to be stuff.
You're meant to be a water boy.
And that's what you're going to be.
Damn, dude.
And that's indoor water.
That's not even outside.
That's some bullshit.
You're meant to be a water boy.
It's good for you.
Water is good for you.
It is.
But not for me to do that.
Yeah, I get it.
I'm sorry.
I was trying to make wise.
What team did you want to play for?
I can see AJ being on the Timberwolves.
I want to go to the NBA, but I don't want to play for the Kings.
Ain't coming up, right?
This is 2016.
I love Derrick Rose.
He was my favorite player.
Hell yeah.
Go Bulls.
An O'Leary Bulls jersey.
Dude, that would have been cool.
I would love that.
You would have cleaned up by Wrigley Field.
Oh, yeah.
Oh, dude.
Easily.
Windy City.
Have you ever been there?
Never.
Go to Wrigley Field and outside there is all bars.
Okay.
And that's where you should go.
Okay.
I go there too because it's only white bitches.
Oh, okay.
You don't know his preferences.
But I'm saying he'll be safe there.
We haven't even asked him that.
We haven't even gotten there on the notes yet.
We haven't.
What's your favorite race?
We have a pie chart of his former lovers.
Pull it up on pages.
That's very good.
That'd be nice if it was.
I can see you fucking with black chicks.
Have you?
I never have.
No?
Never have.
Not opposed to it?
Not opposed to it.
Try to be open minded.
Mostly whites so far in life.
I'm sorry, man.
We went from North Carolina to Birmingham.
Actually, they told me there's a lot of Spaniards.
Have you ever been to Birmingham?
Me?
Yeah.
Like once or twice.
Yeah, we went together, man.
It's pretty even split.
But I didn't see the Puerto Ricans they were talking about there.
Yeah, no.
Birmingham, it's all blacks and whites.
Really?
Yeah, yeah.
Who was telling me?
I think it was Keenan was like, Puerto Rican chicks all up in there.
Could be.
He targets them.
That's Keenan, you know?
It's Keenan.
He knows what he wants.
That's cool.
But mostly whites at this point.
Dabbled in Asian before.
Oh, wow.
That's how he just found it.
Actually, no, that's not true.
I was with this girl who her parents were Indian.
Southeast Asian.
Yeah, Southeast Asian and East Asian and white.
Did her dad look like me?
Wait, what is East Asian?
I don't know.
Thailand?
Could have.
Yeah.
They're on the border.
They were trans.
He doesn't want to talk.
It's fine.
It was a sex tourism thing.
Five cents suck bar, dude.
We've all been there.
We have a private note in our iPhone about it.
First of all, I can't talk about that on here, but I'll talk about it in the solo part.
All right.
AJ, that ghostly Muhammad Ali over there means that's the end of the pod.
Oh, wow.
It went by so fast.
We could literally talk to you for three hours.
This was fun, man.
Thank you guys for having me.
Thank you so much.
If you want to, right now, in this camera right here, anything you got coming up, it'll
be on the side of you.
All your socials and stuff for people listening.
I will be at... Is this good for the promo, you think?
Hold it right over your face.
Laugh Till You Cry Show.
I did a very awkward promo for this on Instagram already this week, so it's up.
July 31st at Carter's Hookah Lounge.
Come see me.
We'll play that promo again, too, if we can.
Yeah.
Hell yeah.
What else?
Funny Business, July 18th, Kerrigan's Pub.
Come check it out.
Thank you guys for having me.
Socials.
Of course, man.
Socials.
YouTube.
You don't need to look at my YouTube.
Funny Guy AJ, 9243.
There are 9242 others.
And Facebook, AJ O'Leary, Instagram, AJ O'Leary 43.
So see you later.
Alligator.
After a while.
Crocodile.
Hey.
Hell yeah.
I'll just split.
isz