you are now listening to cryptid cocktail party
Welcome back, everyone, to another episode of
Crypto Cocktail Party, a show where we have a
few drinks, share a few laughs, take a dive into
the unknown. I'm your host, Dave, joined as always
by my wonderful co -host, Sarge. How's it going,
Sarge? What's going on? Me? Oh, I mean, all,
everyone. Hey, gang. Hi, how are you, buddy?
I'm good. I'm good. My son and I are taking boxing
lessons together on Sundays. And? It's embarrassing
how bad I am compared to how good he is. He's
10 years old and he is far more technically proficient
at punching than I am. Well, he also has the
advantage of youth. Right. And he's about 400
cheeseburgers lighter than I am. So that helps.
Yeah. We do burnout sessions at the end and I'm...
perpetually just out of breath and sweaty. I
feel like if you guys sparred up one -on -one,
you could absolutely decimate that child. Oh,
yeah. No, it would only take one punch. I would
send him into the stratosphere. Who's really
more proficient? The coach did tell me I don't
have to punch as hard as I've been punching.
You don't have to. No, he's like, you don't need
to do all that. Yeah, but... Why not? Fun fact,
by the way. You know how big and puffy boxing
gloves are? Yeah, it does nothing to your knuckles.
It still hurts. It's also really hard to pee.
You got to take them off. I tried it. It's like
trying to pee with broken mittens on. Well, I
mean, you're wearing shorts. Just pull them down
or lift up one leg. That's what I do, but I still
got to take the gloves off. Because I want to
untie the shorts. So I do have to lift to the
side. Yeah. It's classic. That's the best way
to go about it. Okay. But you're doing good.
I'm glad you're doing good. Yeah. Lost 10 pounds.
Oh, hell yeah, dude. Look at you. Yeah. I'm not
going to be fat anymore. I'm working on it. But
you know what? You know, it's okay to be fat
too. No, I'm just losing weight because my doctor
says I'm going to die if I don't. Anyway. Well,
you look good. Things are going well. Yeah. So
I got a question for you. Why is it so cold out?
I don't understand. Why is it so cold? I was
led to believe that as time progressed, things
would get warmer because we have destroyed our
planet. Yet my balls have been inside my rib
cage for like a whole month. But if you had to
guess why it's so cold, why is it so cold? It's,
you know, you've got weather coming in from the
Arctic, which is extremely cold. Yeah. And you've
got warm air coming up from the south, which
is just pummeling the shit out of us with snow.
Okay. But it's, you know, it's what we call here
in New England, the Montreal Express. It's the
cold weather coming down from Canada. So you're
telling me that it's not a shadowy cabal using
weather weapons to keep people indoors and complacent?
Oh, shit. Are we talking about DARPA? I don't
know. All I'm saying is that, according to the
internet, from what I've gathered, the government
can weaponize the weather for pretty much any
reason, Sarge, okay? Okay, yeah. I've heard this.
Yeah, and I'm not talking about shit from some
random on Reddit, okay? I heard this from people
straight from inside our government, okay? Okay.
Hurricanes, snow, wildfires, all of it. And if
you don't think that's true, Sarge... We'll buckle
up because we're not talking about DARPA. We're
going to be talking just all weather weapons.
Oh, nice. Okay, good. Okay, good. This is great
because I was actually just reading a post from
Facebook where this absolute fucking rocket scientist
said that it's not real snow that's been falling.
And you'll know it's not real snow because you
make a snowball, right? And then... You try to
light it on fire. Oh, there's a bit lighter and
the snow doesn't melt. It turns black. Yeah.
Cause it's not because of the soot from burning
or because of the shit inside the snow, like
the chemicals from, you know, pollution is obviously
not. Why would it be that? It's clearly not that.
No, it's clearly not the carbon coming off of
the lighter that you're holding next to the snow.
No, it's gotta be that the snow is plastic. Yeah.
And just happens to be also fucking cold. Yeah.
But will also melt if you put fire near it. No.
Yes? No. What? It will, actually. You just, you
gotta wait a second. That's what happens. They,
like, put the fire next to it and it turns black
and you're like, whoa, look! And I'm like, yeah,
hold the lighter there for longer, you fucking
ape. Sarge, you're talking nonsense, alright?
Yeah, no, you're right. You're right. I'm the
idiot. I've only lived in this shit my entire
life. What the hell do I know about snow? Tell
me, guy from Texas. shed some brilliance upon
me so i'm gonna take it you're familiar with
weather weapons as a yeah i actually fucking
love this concept so much and i this is like
one of those things where like you know we get
a conspiracy theory and i'm like oh you're a
fucking idiot or we get a conspiracy theory and
i'm like god damn i wish that were true and this
is the one i wish were true you wish the weather
oh god yeah i want this to be real so fucking
bad Yeah, it's kind of crazy. Like I said, before
we started recording, I kind of went on a whole
rabbit hole with this one. The reason why I started
is because my wife saw a post. I forget where
it was. She was just telling me about it, about
how people were saying that the reason why it's
so cold is because the government is using the
cold to keep people from protesting the ice.
It's not working. Well, no, I know it's not working.
It has managed to contribute to ice on ice crime,
though. I have seen more ice agents eat complete
shit on black ice. Those are my favorite. The
best ones are the edits of people making out
them. They're so fucking good. I saw one where
an ice agent fell on like a big patch of ice
and then coins came out like from something.
That's easily in my top five. So real quick before
we start this episode, there's a lot in this
one. And so we're going to break this up. This
is actually going to be a two -parter. So what
I did is I did my best. All right, so here's
the thing with Weather Weapon. So we're going
to get into it. Is that it's like a multitude
of things. That one leads to the other thing,
which leads to the other thing, which is another
thing. But also these things separately on their
own are their own conspiracies that have different
things going. So I tried to bridge them together
to connect one certain theory of weather weapons.
Got it. So we're going to do that this episode.
Next episode, we'll talk about... debunk them
obviously because that's kind of what we do here
yeah and then we'll also go into the reasons
why people believe it but i've i figured one
we'll just have fun with it i'm so excited about
this because we are going to cover chemtrails
right well we'll see okay uh all right so before
we dive into the conspiracy surrounding weather
control and weather weapons and all the fun stuff
uh as we always like to point out behind every
conspiracy theory is a kernel of truth and as
it so happens yes weather modification is a real
thing not in the sense that you can like push
a button and a fucking hurricane appears over
Louisiana like not that kind of way but in the
like us as humans have been fucking with clouds
for what seems like forever kind of way yeah
The most common version of this is cloud seeding.
That's when a plane dumps stuff like silver iodide
into clouds to try and make them drop rain or
snow. And this has been used for farming, water
supply, even like ski resorts use it to get more
and better snow, I guess. So that right there
kind of cracks the door open for the conspiracy
theorists, because now we know that. Like the
answer to the question of can humans affect the
weather is yes, which raises the question of,
okay, but how much? Exactly. So, well, we did
try to answer that question during the Cold War
where we tried to basically weaponize anything
we could. So both us and the Soviets messed around
with weather for like military advantages, triggering
rain, fog, storms, anything. None of it works,
at least like not reliably. That didn't stop
him from trying. Do you remember, do you ever
see the movie Step Brothers? Yeah. You know when
they're trying to sell prestige worldwide and
they're talking about science experiments and
he's like, we put white out on a bee. It died.
Yeah. I feel like 90 % of the science experiments
run by the KGB and the CIA in the 1970s and 80s
were essentially Dale and Brennan. Yeah. It was
just like, how can we weaponize? anything yeah
can we read minds let's try it out yeah and again
none of it works none of it not not a thing stop
them and not gonna lie you gotta kind of like
appreciate that gumption that like right the
can -do attitude that we have as a country i'm
not mad at it they really tried everything yeah
uh so after that failed you know now we're kind
of at vietnam and uh Just yada, yada, yada'd
us to Vietnam. So during the war, the U .S. ran
an operation known as Operation Popeye, where
they tried to extend the monsoon season by seeding
clouds over enemy supply routes. Because they
wanted to increase the spinach yield. Yeah, the
idea here was essentially that more rain equaled
more mud, equaled harder to move troops and equipment.
yes historically the u .s government has tried
to use weather as a weapon and it is pretty well
documented like it's not like a secret yeah but
uh it was i mean it was kind of yeah i guess
but once that news came out it kind of freaked
out a lot of the other countries around us so
badly that in 1977 they all signed a treaty basically
saying let's uh let's not do that yeah let's
not let's not change weather On purpose, let's
do it by accident with poison. That treaty is
called the Environmental Modification Convention,
and it bans using weather and natural systems
as weapons, which is great. You probably shouldn't
be fucking around with the weather anyway. Yeah,
I bet we didn't. Yeah, the only problem is that
normally you don't ban something unless someone
has already attempted to do it. So from a conspiracy
mindset, that's all the proof you need that weather
weapons exist. You've got real cloud seeding.
real military experiments, real war usage, and
a real international ban. So that's the kernel
of truth that is underlying this whole conspiracy.
And once you've got that kernel, anything can
grow out of it. So are you ready to dive into
a couple of these weather control, weather weapon
conspiracies that I tried to put in order? All
right, so first up, we got Sarge's favorite,
classic conspiracy, chemtrails. Chemtrails. We
all know and love them. It's probably the most
popular weather conspiracy because they're visible.
You don't need a document or something. You just
look up. There they are. And as long as you don't
understand how planes work at all, it's really,
really easy to get into. Yeah, so for those of
you lucky enough to have never heard someone
ramble on at length about chemtrails, basically
the claim here is that those long white trails
you see behind airplanes, it isn't condensation.
No. That's not what that is. They're chemicals
being sprayed over us on purpose by either the
government, the military, or the shadowy cabal
of global elites operating through commercial
airlines. Now you're probably wondering, What
are they spraying exactly and what is it doing
to us? Well, that all depends on who you ask.
They could be spraying mind control agents, population
control chemicals, biological agents, some sort
of climate altering compounds, which is what
we're going to be focusing on, or just vague
toxins. Just, yeah, just whatever. And what do
they use for? Well. Again, depends. It could
be to weaken our immune systems, lower fertility,
slowly poison specific regions, make people more
docile and complacent, or as my friend likes
to call it, the people pacifier. Right. I think
it's very funny. Or again, as it relates to this
episode, is to prepare the atmosphere for weather
manipulation. Gotcha. And as far as who's behind
it, like I said, well, it's either government.
nato the quote -unquote deep state or possibly
pharmaceutical companies or the aforementioned
globalist cabal i think the logic here is behind
chemtrails is that if you can control the skies
you can control how it's like somehow control
like what happens below it or something maybe
yeah i don't know but once you believe that the
sky itself is under control everything else just
kind of makes sense, right? Like if they can
spray chemicals, they can build clouds. If they
can build clouds, they can seed storms. If they
can seed storms, they can steer weather. So in
the bigger weather control story, chemtrails
themselves aren't like weather weapons. They're
just kind of like the delivery system for said
weather weapon, if that makes sense. So if chemtrails
seed the atmosphere, how do we control it? Well,
the answer is simple. harp of course before you
continue i just for anybody who's really interested
in how fucking stupid this concept is there's
a guy named cc chris from westchester county
he has a youtube channel okay he's often like
just absolutely decimated by people who actually
understand science he's one of those morons who
believes that the earth is flat But one of his
biggest complaints in almost every video that
he does is that it's always cloudy on the weekends.
And he is blaming the government because they're
using chemtrails to create cloudy weekends. I
don't know why. Specifically for him? He's not
a bright guy. When you listen to him talk, he
sounds like he's one of those people who like...
was probably a D student his entire life and
just continued that, that trend of just not pursuing
any knowledge. Just barely skated by. Right.
And he, he like, I think he picks flat earth
because he can't wrap his brain around the fact
that the planet is round. Yeah. That makes sense.
Like why my feet flat if world round. So yeah.
When you say Westchester, like near me, like
New York. Oh, New York. C .C. Chris from Westchester
County. That's how he starts every video. And
his hair is blown. It's white and it's blown
straight back. But it's puffy. And Doc Brown
situation. Not as cool as Doc Brown. It's like
if Doc Brown were a Goomba. Like he looks like
he's on his way to go see his Goomba. You know
what I mean? Well, I'm going to do my best to
not. You have to at least see one of his videos.
There's one where he's doing like his flat earth
talk and his wife walks into the kitchen and
she calls him an idiot and walks away and he
kept the video. It's like that dude who... The
dude who reviewed whiskey and his wife's leaving
him in the background. Yeah. Videos. Yeah. It's
just like that. It's so funny. Uh, anyway, uh,
anyway, I know that I derailed it, but if you,
if you want to hear somebody really rant about
this nonsense, look up Chris from Westchester
County. It's fucking hilarious. So, so yeah.
So if, if chemtrails seed the atmosphere, then
harp is what controls it. So you, are you familiar?
You're familiar with. With HARP, right? Yes.
Okay. And again, for anyone who doesn't know
what HARP is, HARP stands for the High Frequency
Active Auroral Research Program, which right
out the gate just sounds like a lie. I mean,
frankly, if you were the government and you wanted
people to believe there was some kind of crazy
conspiracy, this is the way to do it. That's
the kind of name you give something. When you
don't want people to ask any follow -up questions.
They might as well have just called it Project
Monarch. You know what I mean? Yeah. Like, just
give it a weird, creepy name. No, no question.
And don't be specific at all. Everyone's going
to question it, but at the same time, no one
will question it. It's like a weird Schrodinger's
cat. You're just immediately like, yeah, no,
that sounds about right. Yeah. Now, officially,
HAARP is a research facility up in Alaska made
of a big field of antennas that are used to study
the ionosphere, which is the upper part of the
atmosphere where like the auroras happen and
like radio waves like travel. But according to
the conspiracy world, that's a crock of shit.
It's all lies to true believers. HARP isn't a
research facility. It's a weather machine, or
depending on the day, it's an earthquake generator,
a mind control device, or a way to communicate
with aliens. Really, really versatile pieces
of equipment. It really is. As for who's running
it, well, again, it depends. Could be the U .S.
military, could be DARPA, different intelligent
agencies are the same. Pesky global elites doing
all the chemtrailing. The globalists. And the
idea here is that HAARP has the ability to send
massive amounts of energy into the atmosphere
and can heat sections of the sky, move pressure
systems around to stabilize the weather, and
trigger devastating natural disasters. Think
of it as a reverse of a Jewish space laser. Yes.
As for the purpose, again... It all depends on
who's ranting at you about it at the time. Some
say it's strictly for weather warfare, creating
disasters without having to fire any missiles.
Others say it's for population control, suppressing
protests, weakening certain regions economically,
foreign and domestic, or even manipulating human
brainwaves, which I didn't look into how or why.
I just thought that was funny and I left it as
is because I want everyone else's imaginations
to run wild with that one. I love it. Honestly,
that would be my favorite use for it. Because
it would explain a great deal. Yeah. Maybe, maybe,
maybe harp is what's pushing so much misinformation
about like flat earth. Yeah. They're creating
the conspiracy theories to push the conspiracies
to, to steer us away from the real conspiracies.
Yeah. That's my, it's just like a long game of
whack -a -mole. I mean, this was actually a good,
a good like, um, theory to explain alien phenomena.
Because there are people who believe that the
government is purposely not stopping UFO misinformation
and wanting people to believe in aliens so that
they can continue to just fly experimental jets
and drones and shit. And everybody's like, it's
aliens. And the government's like, yeah, it's
definitely maybe. for sure and the thing was
with harp too is that there's a big connection
between it and like different patents and military
documents which are mostly unrelated yeah which
conspiracy theorists fucking love they like to
point to old patents or documents from forever
ago about whether modification or electromagnetic
systems and be like see they wrote this shit
all down right there right and you know the best
way to hide a conspiracy is to write it all down
yeah Are you writing down a criminal conspiracy?
And then there's also just like you said, the
vibe of the installation, like harp looks exactly
like what a secret weather weapon would look
like. It looks like the secret layer of like
Superman's worst enemy. Yeah. It's a government
funded grid of antennas aimed at the sky in the
middle of nowhere. So, I mean, I get it. It's
problematic. It's definitely problematic. But
yeah, so if you're following along. this is where
we are so far chemtrails is the delivery harp
is like the steering wheel you spray the sky
with a little bit of chemicals then you zap it
with energy and now you got storms whenever and
wherever so far is that making sense yeah how
these two are connected like i said i tried to
connect as much as something this fucking stupid
could make sense yes it totally makes sense to
me yeah so what do the globalists plan to do
with these storms Once they have created them
after seeding with chemtrails and harp, they
got it all. What are they going to do? Punish
the people most likely to keep voting for their
interests by making floods in the South and snowing
on Texas. Sarge, you nailed it. They're going
to use it for political purposes, of course.
Duh. Now, the perfect example of this being Hurricanes
Helen and Milton. This just happened. And for
those listening who may not be aware of what
I'm talking about. After Helen ripped through
the southeast in late September of 2024, killing
hundreds and flooding huge parts of the region,
social media immediately lit up with posts saying
that this wasn't your average hurricane. Right.
It was a targeted attack. All right. People claim
that the storm was aimed at a specific at specific
states right before the presidential election,
targeting areas with certain voting patterns.
Red states. Yeah, it didn't help that that that
the. hurricane on a weather map it looked like
a like a trans flag Oh, yeah. Shouldn't have
done that. Yeah. And to no one's surprise, I'm
sure, one of the loudest voices pushing that
idea was none other than Marjorie Taylor Greene,
who posted on X, quote, Yes, they can control
the weather. It's ridiculous for anyone to lie
and say it can't be done, end quote. And she
posted that alongside a map of Helen's path overlaid
with electoral data, implying that the storm
had been steered into Republican areas. On purpose.
Then not long after Helen, Hurricane Milton hit
in early October and the conspiracy from there
just started to evolve. Instead of Milton being
another AIM storm, people started claiming that
it had a specific job to do, which was to hit
the same region again to slow down recovery efforts.
So the theory was that Helen destroyed the infrastructure
and Milton was just there to like finish the
job. Right. Pretty much. Batten cleanup. Yeah,
it was to keep people displaced, preventing rebuilding,
and making sure that those areas stayed unstable
going into the election season. Some people framed
it as voter suppression by disaster. Others framed
it as economic sabotage. Either way, the desired
outcome was the same. President Trump was elected
to office, so. Good job, everybody. You did it.
No, we did it. From the outside listening in.
This sounds wild. Yeah. But with both in conspiracy
circles, this makes perfect sense. Sudden intensification
of a storm. That's not heat and wind. It's someone
at heart flipping a switch. Of course. Or changes
direction. That's just someone steering the ship,
baby. And if a storm just so happens to hit a
certain region right before the election, that's
not bad luck. That's just good strategy. All
right. Right. And it is in no way the fault of.
All of the industries that are currently polluting
our entire planet. It's got to be the government.
Yeah, I don't. Yeah. Yeah. So we got so we got
storms as weapons. What else? Well, what about
fire? Oh, now, admittedly, this isn't so much
weather as a weapon, but blaming the weather
on a weapon. Does that make sense? So the claim
here is that the massive wildfires that have
been happening more and more frequent and becoming
more and more destructive in recent years, they're
not caused by drought, wind, or garbage infrastructure.
No, that's silly. No, they're started on purpose
with direct energy weapons, a .k .a. space lasers.
Space lasers. Jewish space lasers. Yeah, we got
there. You didn't think we were going to get
there, but we got there. And the only way to
stop them is to rake the forest. according to
the absolute genius who is running this country.
Oh, there's also other ways, but we'll get into
that. So the first major round of this theory
came after the 2018 campfire in Northern California.
It was one of the deadliest and most destructive
wildfires in the state's history. And almost
immediately, because that's the world we live
in now, conspiracy theories started popping up
about what the real cause of the fires was. It
wasn't natural. It was lasers. Obviously. Right.
Right. And pretty soon that idea jumped from
like backwater Internet forums to actual U .S.
politics because we live in a nightmare. Thanks
once again to our good friend Marjorie Taylor
Greene. when she shared a now -deleted Facebook
post where she said there were, quote, too many
coincidences to ignore and claimed that people
had reported seeing, quote, lasers of blue beams
or light causing the fires. She then connected
the fires to space -based technologies, writing
that the systems could, quote, beam the sun's
energy back to Earth and then asking, quote,
What would that look like anyway? A laser beam
or a light beam coming down to Earth, I guess?
Could that cause a fire? Hmm, I don't know. I
hope not, end quote. Just really smart. It's
a really smart theory. Yeah, she then framed
this all as curiosity, saying she was, quote,
posting this in speculation, stemming from my
curiosity, end quote. But the invocation was
that the fires... were started on purpose. And
she also heavily implied that the Jews were behind
it all by mentioning the Rothschilds. Fucking
George Soros. By mentioning the Rothschilds and
that, quote, powerful financial backers tied
to energy and infrastructure projects could be
involved, end quote. Yeah. It could be. Could
be, Marjorie. Is that what we're going with?
Could be. You never know. Yeah. She just, she,
I, there aren't many people in the world who
actually just look super dumb. But Marjorie Taylor
Greene, I swear to God, if her eyes get any closer
together, she's going to be a cyclops. She looks
like a fucking cartoon character. Yeah. She looks
like Mickey Rourke, but... You just can't take
her seriously either. Nothing she says makes
any sense. No. But I think that's her whole thing.
I know. It's what makes me so glad that she left
Congress. She didn't leave because of her morals
or beliefs. It was because Trump was like, you're
too dumb to be a senator. Maybe. I don't know.
I don't think it was her morals. I don't think
she is capable of having those. No, I feel like
somehow this is all strategic power play. Like
she's something's going on here. I mean, it could
be, but I don't think she's smart enough to figure
that out. Maybe not. But maybe the shadowy globalist
elites that are. George Soros. There you go.
Now, fast forward just a few short years to when
the Hawaii wildfires in 2023 devastated parts
of Maui and other areas. And you start to see
similar themes pop up. But this time with even
weirder aspects of them like that, the lasers
spared the rich areas or that houses with blue
roofs were left untouched because the lasers
either couldn't see blue was calibrated to ignore
blue or the color blue somehow reflected the
beam to ignore blue. I don't know. But people
were sharing like side by side photos of houses
like blue roofs that were still standing. But
like the surrounding houses were all burned down
or like blue cars were untouched, but others
got destroyed. The logic is there. Yeah, I get
it, you know. So you're probably wondering why
use weather as a weapon at all. Well, if you're
trying to control people, territory or resources,
weather is kind of the best weapon imaginable.
It's a weapon that looks natural, hits huge areas
at once and rain doesn't need like to declare
war before it starts falling. Right. Yeah. A
hurricane doesn't look like an attack. Droughts
don't look like sabotage. Oh, we didn't even
get into the drought shit. That's well, we'll
get there. Don't worry. We'll cover that in the
next episode. Now they're torturing us with a
lack of weather. We got I didn't even touch on
it. But yeah, so. A hurricane doesn't look like
an attack, droughts don't look like sabotage,
and a wildfire doesn't look like a targeted strike.
According to your insurance, they all look like
an act of God, which is exactly why they are
so useful. Whoever is behind a weather weapon
attack doesn't have to take credit or admit that's
even what it is. They can just be like, damn,
dude, fucking weather's been crazy lately, huh?
Yeah, and that keeps people scared. Yeah. And
to quote Frank Herbert, fear is the mind killer.
Or controller. Yeah. Either way, it's gotcha.
Either way, you're scared. You're scared and
you're fucked. And weather weapons are good for
all sorts of different operations. Weather is
perfect for forcing people to relocate, destroying
food production, making land cheaper, and breaking
economies. Floods push people off the coast,
droughts shut down farms, fires erase towns,
and storms absolutely fuck up infrastructure.
If you bomb a city, that's an act of war. But
if a storm wipes out a city... That's a tragedy.
That's an oopsie. And no one can ever tie it
back to whoever sent it. Right. Now, I guess
the next question would be, why do people believe
in this conspiracy? Who does, how does someone
look at a hurricane or fire or whatever and go,
yeah, someone did that. I'm going to guess a
high, high diet, chock full of lead paint. Probably.
Or maybe it's because natural chaos makes people
uncomfortable and random disasters feel worse
than intentional ones. Right. But we'll dive
more into that in part two, where we debunk this
nonsense, as well as dive into the reasons why
people believe this shit, as well as cover a
couple more other instances of weather weapons.
Oh, yeah. There's part one of weather weapons.
How you feeling, Sarge? Anything you want to
add? I'm sure there's a lot that I missed. You
know, there's, I mean, this is just so much fun,
honestly. Like when you think about how stupid
our government is, and then you think that they
would be capable of controlling the weather and
yet have done nothing productive with it. Yeah,
because you could use it for a lot of stuff,
like the aforementioned droughts. You could use
it to make it not drought. Yeah, or maybe we
could make things so bad in Russia that they're
no longer a threat to our security. But instead,
we're like, you know what? I don't like this
protest. Let's make it snow a little. Yeah, but
also, Russia's already shitty. Yeah, it's already
been placed. Nobody wants to be there. Just adding
insult to injury by making it, I don't know,
wet. Yeah. I guess. Um, but no, like I, to me,
it just seems like the, if there was, if there
was a way to control the weather, we would have
found a way to monetize it. Not. Oh yeah, for
sure. You know, they'd be like, Hey, you pay
a little extra. We'll rain on your lawn. Yeah.
You know, like, come on. I didn't even think
about that aspect of it. Is that if we did have
the ability to, yeah, we'd be fucking selling,
selling that shit off. Yeah. Africa would be
a fucking jungle again. Yeah. Amazon wouldn't
be shrinking. Yeah. Like there's so many good
things you could do for all the wrong reasons,
which is the only way to motivate our government
to do anything positive. Yeah. Is money. And
I, so I'm sorry, but they're not going to. And
the other thing is like, okay, chemtrails. This
is the thing that kills me about chemtrails.
There's only one thing? Them using chemtrails
to control the weather. Okay. Got it. However,
if you're a global elite, you don't get to run
away. You're not immune from weather. And it's
their fucking houses falling into the water when
there's erosion on the coast. Oh, but then we're
going to drop mind control shit out of chemtrails.
Okay, great. You're still not immune to that,
you fucking idiots. They could be. They could
have the immunity to all those things. Maybe,
but I find it... They need to breed outside of
the herd, you know what I mean? Otherwise, they're
all going to be inbred. They're all going to
start looking like Barron Trump. I guess. I don't
know. I get it. I'm just like a little pet peeve
of mine. If you look into any of this stuff,
it's so fun to see the kinds of people who believe
in it. You're never surprised when somebody who
believes in this stuff starts to, you're like,
oh, yeah, that makes sense. When you look at
any conspiracy theory is that if you just take
one step, you don't even take two steps back,
just one step back and be like, this falls apart
almost immediately. But that's actually why I
love conspiracy theories because when you like,
as long as you remove yourself from them and
the conspiracy theories and actively ruining
your country, like the many that are doing it
right now, when you look at like the silly ones,
like, like chemtrails, you're like, come on guys.
Think about it for a second. Yeah. Just, just
a minute. But even the bigger ones, like nine
11, like you got it. It's just, yeah. I mean,
there's, I am not. completely immune to believing
that people might have taken advantage of 9 -11
to get to their own political ends for sure I'm
not but I don't think they did it on purpose
yeah they didn't do it but they definitely saw
they maximized on it yeah which explains why
the word 9 -11 was probably the most said word
in every election after 9 -11 yeah well fucking
9 -11's mayor he ran on that yeah 9 -11 All right.
Yeah, so there you have it. That's kind of like
this is the one weather conspiracy where, like
I said, I tried to show you how they were connected
as I went down. I think I did an okay job. No,
I think you did great. No, it was a very logical
flow for a completely illogical concept. You
know how hard that was to try and do that? It's
really hard because you don't have a head injury,
so it's very hard to explain something this stupid.
Also, just on a completely separate note, to
the one person who wrote a review, I would like
to just share some good news. Neither Dave or
I are hungover this episode. We are not. I'm
not hungover. I've actually cut back on drinking.
I'm trying to lose some weight. Yeah, me too,
actually. Yeah, so not as much beer, no more
hard liquor. Yeah, it's going good. Yeah, we're
behaving ourselves. Being sober for this long
is... It's odd. Especially because this should
be a time when we get really drunk because it's
not only the winter, but it's also the end of
America, you know? Yeah. So I feel like we should
be drinking more, but I think I'm going to handle
this one sober for a while. Yeah. At least for
a bit. Until it gets real bad. Then I'm like,
ah, fuck it. We'll change the name of the show
to Cryptid Mocktail Party. All right. Yeah. So
thanks everyone for listening. That's the episode.
Be sure to tune in next week for part two, where
I don't know, we're either going to debunk it
or we'll just go into some more crazy weather.
I haven't decided yet. We'll figure it out. All
right. So with that out of the way, is there
anything you want to plug? Anything you want
to talk about before we. No, no, I don't have
too much going on. If you're, if you're in Puerto
Rico, listening to the show, I'm going to be
in your. uh territory very soon i'm going to
puerto rico for a week for work but my nights
will be free so if there's any listeners hit
me up and i will drive through what i'm told
is a lot of jungle and find you hell yeah that'd
be that'd actually be pretty sick it's kind of
where i'm staying is so i'm not like being a
smart ass like where i'm staying apparently there's
a lot of lush rainforesty stuff that's awesome
i'm looking forward to it Yeah, that sounds sick
as fuck. All right. Well, that's cool. Yeah.
So if you're in Puerto Rico, fucking hit me up.
Hit me up on Instagram and we'll, I don't know,
figure something out. Maybe we'll make a night
of it. Yeah. Also, I didn't make a big deal out
of it, but yesterday was our three year, three
anniversary of a show. Oh, congratulations to
us for the anniversary. Also, one week. into
our pre -orders for our crushed ice t -shirt
it's going pretty well if my math is correct
which it probably isn't we're on track to have
raised minus the cost of like getting the shirts
made and shipping and stuff like that close to
like a little over two thousand dollars to donate
to the uh defending our neighbors fund so that's
awesome that's pretty crazy um yeah so one week
left um i certainly contributed to that um immense
workload I ordered two myself. I'm very excited.
I can't wait. So, yeah, if you want to order
one, it's crushedice .bigcartel .com. We partnered
up with a bunch of other cryptid and paranormal
and one very pro Second Amendment creators to
bring you this shirt. Cryptid Clyde, Ghost Story
Guys, Perplexity, Believing the Bizarre, Better
Way 2A, Hellmouth Paranormal, Us. cool parents.
And I think there's one more that I can't remember,
but yeah, it's a lot of us. Uh, so it was pretty
cool. Uh, yeah, do that. Leave us a five -star
rating and review wherever you can follow us
on Instagram, uh, cryptic cocktail, TikTok, cryptic
cocktail party. And then it's all out of the
way. Sarge, do you want to say goodbye? And I
love you to the audience. Of course. Goodbye.
And I love you. Except for ice. Fuck those guys.