WEBVTT

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you are now listening to cryptid cocktail party

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Welcome back, everyone, to another episode of

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Cryptic Cocktail Party, a show where we have

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a few drinks, share a few laughs, take a dive

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into the unknown. I'm your host, Dave, joined

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as always by my wonderful co -host, Sarge. How's

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it going, Sarge? Fucking amazing. Yeah? Yeah,

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I'm going to see Pantera next weekend. Oh, awesome.

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Make sure you take a bunch of videos of him giving

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Nazi salutes. a good time yeah all right look

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look i'm not actually going to see pantera i'm

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going to see amana marth they just happen to

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be opening for pantera all right that's valid

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still not a great look when you've done some

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nazi salutes and you're gonna have a swedish

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band open for you are you gonna drive there are

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you going to uh walk and uh we got a very special

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guest today we're joined by the dadman himself

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uh wesley pipes aka pipes buffet what's going

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on man Hey, I'm going to see Clips next weekend.

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I'm extremely excited. Hey, kid, I threw my vape.

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Get it for me. One of the benefits of having

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a child. Oh, my God. Exactly. They always get

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your vape for you. I saw Ghost on Monday. Oh,

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hell yeah. On Monday. Fuck, dude. Yeah. I can't

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go. Yeah, I was not happy about it either. And

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they played at the garden. And you couldn't have

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your fucking phone on you. They were stupid and

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had people there that would unlock your phone

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in designated areas. So I just went there and

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they unlocked it for me. And because Ghost is

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really popular with like 12 -year -olds, she

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was just inundated with children. So I just walked

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by her without locking my phone up again. Whoa,

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so a show at a venue the size of the Garden and

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they are able to pull off locking the phones?

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Yeah, they make you put it in this stupid little

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baggie, right? And I don't like to be told what

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to do. Which is weird, because I was in the military

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for a while. But also, you're a veteran, so obviously

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I feel like that comes with the territory. So

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I snuck in my vape, and I also did not allow

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them to lock up my phone permanently. I literally,

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they locked my phone, I went up the escalator,

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went to the phone area where they could unlock

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it. I unlocked my phone, took it out of the pouch,

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and then locked the pouch and put that in my

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pocket, and then put my phone in my other pocket.

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Wait, so goat? It's like, fuck you guys, you

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can't tell me what to do. Fuck you, I won't do

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what you tell me, I'm 43! I'm sorry. I was just

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going to say, I didn't know you were in the military,

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so I want to say this is not stolen valor. I

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actually did kill a bunch of teenagers a few

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decades ago. Oh, it looks like we have something

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in common. I'm just kidding. I didn't do that.

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I didn't. I promise. Well, there goes the algorithm

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fooling. This one's getting pulled. Wesley, we've

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known each other for going on... You can call

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me Johnny. You can call me whatever. You can

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call me what you always call me. That's fine,

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too. I don't care. No last names. No birthdown.

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No social security numbers. But we've known each

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other for what? Going on 20, 25 years? I was

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just telling Sarge here that I used to buy you

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alcohol before you were of age. Oh, yeah. We

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used to slam Sparks underneath the stairs of

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the Brick House. Mad Dog 2020, dude. Orange Jubilee,

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though. Best flavor. No other flavor. Sparks

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was only out for six months, wasn't it? Before

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people were dying? I vividly remember Sparks.

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It was the Four Loko of our generation. It was

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great. I can actually still... The taste was

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the most malty, malt, licorice beverage taste

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I could... I feel like it was like chewable,

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Flintstones chewable vitamins. Yeah, it kind

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of had that medicinal taste to it. Liquid -tasted

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chewable. Yeah, yeah, you could actually chew

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it. Yeah. It was kind of fucked up. All right,

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John, so quick question. We ask this to all our

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guests before we start the episode, but I've

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known you for a bit. You've always been into

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these kinds of conspiracies, maybe not cryptids,

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but definitely aliens, that type of shit for

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a while, right? Actually, I'm actually rocking

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my death head moth. gauges for yeah brother you

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know in solidarity um so yeah not so much the

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cryptids i i pretty much checked out on that

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when i saw mothman prophecies and like the thing

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flew through the car and i was like all right

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this is bogus but um yeah i mean since since

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i got on the internet at age like 13 um i've

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been huge into into all the cool conspiracies

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and paranormal stuff and Hell yeah, man. Well,

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I think I got a pretty good one for you today.

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This actually ties into, you were in a band a

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while back in New Hampshire called MJ12, which

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stands for Majestic 12. This kind of actually

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ties into that briefly at the end, so I think

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you'll get a kick out of it. That is an awesome

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band name, by the way. Yeah. It was characterized

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with the Roman numeral, so it's MJ -XII. Yeah,

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that's awesome. It was pretty sick. It was pretty

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fun. It was great. Yeah. All right. So you guys

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ready to dive into this? Like I said, this is

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very information heavy, so it's mostly story,

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but feel free to interject at any point with

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whatever you got. Hey, I'm just happy that now

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that I'm sober, you don't have to worry about

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me nodding out, bouncing my head off the desk

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while you're rambling on about whatever the fuck.

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Be honest, man, it wouldn't be the first time

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that somebody did that. Yeah, this might get

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a little boring at some points, and I'm sorry,

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but all the information is relevant, I swear.

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We'll keep it spicy. It'll be fine. We'll keep

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it spicy. All right, so in 1965, the U .S. government

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participated in what some might consider the

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worst foreign exchange program ever imagined.

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Twelve military personnel were plucked from existence

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and sent on a classified mission involving aliens.

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deep space travel, and conditions so brutal that

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it's a miracle anyone made it out alive. For

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decades, this mission was kept in the dark from

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the public, and that is until the mid -2000s

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when one brave whistleblower brought to light,

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dragging the secret space program out from the

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shadows. This week, gentlemen, we're going to

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be discussing something called Project Serpo.

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Is that something either of you guys have ever

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heard of? I am familiar with this. Not probably

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the level you're going to go into, but yeah.

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It's on like the periphery of my knowledge. Okay.

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Yeah. I don't know a hundred percent if I, if

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I recognize it sounds very familiar to me is

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I guess what I'm trying to say. I'm pretty sure

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I know what this is. Isn't that the one, the

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one with, uh, with Al Pacino, right? Where he's

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like the detective. Yeah. And he wore the poncho

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and the funny hat. Yeah. Yeah. Operation. Yeah.

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And Charlie from, uh, it's always sunny in Philadelphia.

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did that as well on an episode. Yeah, yeah. Project

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Serpico. That's what we're talking about today.

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Yeah, exactly. That's what I thought you said.

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All right. So the origins of Project Serpo, like

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any good secret space program community, traces

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all the way back to 1947 and the crash at Roswell.

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But according to those involved in Project Serpo,

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what we were told about the incident at Roswell,

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well, some things may have been left out of the

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official story, like the fact that there wasn't

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just one, but two distinct crash sites. the first

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being the one near Corona, New Mexico. That's

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the crash site we all know and love and refer

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to as the Roswell crash. There, the military

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recovered wreckage from the downed craft, a bunch

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of dead aliens, and, most notably, one survivor.

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This surviving entity was immediately taken into

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custody because if there's one thing Americans

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won't tolerate, even in the 40s, it's illegal

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aliens. They were kind enough at least to give

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this one a name. This one was designated EBE

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-1, which stands for Extraterrestrial Biological

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Entity 1. We know him commonly as Hulk Hogan,

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though. R .I .P. R .I .P. Rest in power, King.

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Oh, yeah. He was described as being small, humanoid,

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and frail -looking with brownish skin and large

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black eyes. He wasn't hostile. So Mick Jagger.

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All right, go on. Sorry. No, wait. I think Keith

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Richards is a small one. Yeah. Yeah, they're

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all pretty frail, though. They are British. They're

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all pretty nightmarish. So EBE -1, he wasn't

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hostile. He was actually really calm, cooperative,

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and he kind of seemed like an all -around chill

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dude once he was able to communicate with his

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captors. Once in custody, he was relocated to

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Los Alamos National Laboratory where he lived

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under the care of various scientists and military

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personnel. Then two years later, in 1949, that's

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when the second crash site was discovered. This

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was near Polona Peak. I don't know where that

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is. I'm assuming it's also still in New Mexico.

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There they found additional wreckage and six

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more alien bodies, all of which was recovered

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and transported to various secret military labs.

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So now between both sites, the U .S. had now

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collected two damaged crafts, a shitload of dead

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aliens, and one living being, being EBE -1. who

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was quickly becoming a very valuable source of

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information. Through a combination of hand signals,

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object identification, and eventually some rudimentary

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English, EBE -1 was able to share information

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about his species, their culture, and their technology.

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He also explained how some of the recovered alien

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equipment worked, including the communication

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systems, which he used to transmit a signal to

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his home world. later identified as a planet

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in the Zeta Reticuli system roughly 39 light

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years away. And this laid the groundwork for

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the future meet and greet between his people

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and ours. Now, can I just interrupt you for just

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a second? So this is really interesting that

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you mentioned Zeta Reticuli because of Betty

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and Bonnie Hill, who also claim to be visited

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by aliens from the Zeta Reticuli. Exeter, New

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Hampshire zone. That's right. I actually went,

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every time I go, there's an area that I like

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to go camping and hiking up that way. And every

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time I go, I always stop at the gas station that's

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got that cool. Yeah. Have you been to the UFO

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festival they have there? It's awesome. I went

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a while back. It's pretty cool. I'm sorry to

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derail things, but I thought Zeta Reticula was

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just an interesting thing to call out. Pertinent.

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Especially. Given we got two folks from New Hampshire,

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we need to celebrate Betty and Barney Hill as

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well. But also what I'm hearing from you, Sarge,

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is that Zeta Reticuli may be considered part

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of UFO mythology. Agreed. Keep that in mind.

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No spoilers, but keep that in mind. You know,

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when you mentioned that they were trading technology

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back and forth, for a second, just a brief second,

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I was like, maybe they explained why they keep

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sticking shit up our butts. No. And before you

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go on, Dave, Sartre just mentioned something

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that I actually wanted to touch on right off

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the bat, and he jogged my memory on it. My ADD

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is off the charts, so I'm just all over the place.

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But on the subject of spoilers, just please,

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can we make sure there's no Marvel spoilers during

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this part? Yeah, thanks. I just, you know. Yeah,

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no. Now, E .B. Ewan remained in U .S. custody

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until he sadly passed away in 1952 from an illness

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that doctors couldn't identify or treat, which

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is a bummer. He seemed like a really cool dude,

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and I was really hoping that he could have stuck

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around for the whole thing. So RIP EBE1. This

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one's for you. Let's have just a brief moment

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of silence for. I'm going to drink to your patter

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writer, Dave, because that guy is off the chain.

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That's a classic patter. But guys, don't fret.

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His death was not in vain. Twelve years after

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the passing of EBE -1, the communication link

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that he helped establish paid off. In April of

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1964, after years of intermittent contact, a

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face -to -face meeting between U .S. officials

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and EBE species, known now as the Ebbins, finally

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took place. Now, according to, quote -unquote,

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Project Serpo Material, this meeting took place

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at a remote site near Alamogordo, New Mexico,

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at a prearranged and... very heavily controlled

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landing site. So here's how that whole thing

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went down. So an Edmund spacecraft descended,

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they recovered the remains of their fallen crew

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members, and then initiated a formal exchange

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of information. Luckily, the Edmunds brought

00:12:53.970 --> 00:12:56.409
with them some sort of translation device. They

00:12:56.409 --> 00:12:58.610
didn't actually describe what it was or how it

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worked, but basically it allowed for limited

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but pretty effective communication, kind of.

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It allowed both sides to establish a basic mutual

00:13:07.570 --> 00:13:11.200
understanding of each other. This first direct

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encounter pretty much, it was just like confirming

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what EBE had already told us. The Ebons were

00:13:17.059 --> 00:13:20.179
from Zeta Reticuli, possessed advanced spacefaring

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technology, and had an interest in establishing

00:13:22.620 --> 00:13:26.179
peace relations with humanity. What followed

00:13:26.179 --> 00:13:29.200
next, though, was the negotiation of what some

00:13:29.200 --> 00:13:32.059
might consider a bit of an unprecedented agreement,

00:13:32.360 --> 00:13:35.200
that being an interstellar exchange program.

00:13:35.519 --> 00:13:38.830
And negotiations must have been... fairly quick

00:13:38.830 --> 00:13:42.549
because by 1965 roughly like a year later after

00:13:42.549 --> 00:13:45.269
the initial meeting all the plans were finalized

00:13:45.269 --> 00:13:50.230
so the plan was was that 12 americans 10 men

00:13:50.230 --> 00:13:52.669
two women were selected to travel to the ebbins

00:13:52.669 --> 00:13:56.309
home planet and in return one ebbin would remain

00:13:56.309 --> 00:13:59.649
on earth as a diplomatic liaison now i haven't

00:13:59.649 --> 00:14:03.169
read the art of the deal but i feel like it's

00:14:03.169 --> 00:14:09.539
like a raw deal Yeah, I feel like we got... That

00:14:09.539 --> 00:14:11.580
does not sound like a good trade -off, right?

00:14:11.940 --> 00:14:14.519
I recognize that America is not known for its

00:14:14.519 --> 00:14:17.259
math skills, but we do have to recognize that

00:14:17.259 --> 00:14:20.340
12 is more than one. Yes, but also at the same

00:14:20.340 --> 00:14:23.860
time, the first Eben to be on Earth died within

00:14:23.860 --> 00:14:27.419
five years. And that Eben grew up to be Brittany

00:14:27.419 --> 00:14:31.720
Griner. Sorry, that's a pretty heavy reference

00:14:31.720 --> 00:14:33.740
that might go over the head. I don't know if

00:14:33.740 --> 00:14:38.509
your audience is, but... Oh, our audience. They're

00:14:38.509 --> 00:14:44.970
everyone. I don't know, man. You told me to behave.

00:14:45.009 --> 00:14:47.169
This is me behaving. I'm keeping it classic.

00:14:47.210 --> 00:14:52.190
No, you're doing great. I know. So the 12 selected

00:14:52.190 --> 00:14:54.629
individuals, obviously they were all military,

00:14:54.870 --> 00:14:57.730
Air Force, Army, and Navy, and they were carefully

00:14:57.730 --> 00:15:00.389
chosen for their skills, like their backgrounds,

00:15:00.629 --> 00:15:03.580
their psychological profiles. The group included

00:15:03.580 --> 00:15:06.659
scientists, medical officers, linguists, pilots,

00:15:06.820 --> 00:15:09.700
and security personnel. And before their departure,

00:15:09.820 --> 00:15:12.240
they underwent six months of intensive training

00:15:12.240 --> 00:15:15.019
in a whole slew of fields like astronomy, alien

00:15:15.019 --> 00:15:18.700
language basics, and survival in unknown environments.

00:15:19.179 --> 00:15:22.120
Their identities were completely erased from

00:15:22.120 --> 00:15:24.379
official records, which I learned through this.

00:15:24.500 --> 00:15:27.539
This is a process known as being sheep dipped,

00:15:27.700 --> 00:15:32.169
I guess is what it's called. Yeah. Don't they

00:15:32.169 --> 00:15:38.590
do that in West Virginia? Hunter S. Thompson

00:15:38.590 --> 00:15:42.529
used to talk about that a lot, actually. And

00:15:42.529 --> 00:15:44.590
their families were given cover stories, some

00:15:44.590 --> 00:15:47.090
of which included false death notifications to

00:15:47.090 --> 00:15:49.350
explain them just disappearing out of thin air.

00:15:49.850 --> 00:15:52.950
Then, in July of 1965, it was time to saddle

00:15:52.950 --> 00:15:56.269
up. The 12 -person team boarded an Evans spacecraft

00:15:56.269 --> 00:15:59.299
at the Nevada testing site. And with them, they

00:15:59.299 --> 00:16:01.940
brought supplies like food, water, weapons, scientific

00:16:01.940 --> 00:16:04.759
instruments, and communications gear, all for

00:16:04.759 --> 00:16:07.360
what was intended to be a 10 -year mission. And

00:16:07.360 --> 00:16:09.659
with that, the ship took off, bound for a planet

00:16:09.659 --> 00:16:14.639
39 light years away. So 39 light years is pretty

00:16:14.639 --> 00:16:18.019
far, I would say, I think. I'm not a scientist.

00:16:18.240 --> 00:16:20.700
But to give you an idea of just how far away,

00:16:20.899 --> 00:16:24.080
like, it would take Voyager 1. which travels

00:16:24.080 --> 00:16:26.440
at a speed of around 38 ,000 miles per hour,

00:16:26.519 --> 00:16:31.740
roughly 685 ,000 years to get there. But that's

00:16:31.740 --> 00:16:34.519
human technology. The Evans, they possessed a

00:16:34.519 --> 00:16:36.480
propulsion system that allowed them to cover

00:16:36.480 --> 00:16:39.120
the distance in under a year. They said it took

00:16:39.120 --> 00:16:42.779
them roughly like nine months to get there. Now,

00:16:42.779 --> 00:16:45.440
what that propulsion system was is unclear. Some

00:16:45.440 --> 00:16:48.419
say it's antimatter energy or some sort of space

00:16:48.419 --> 00:16:52.409
warping or wormhole type shit. But in the end,

00:16:52.429 --> 00:16:54.330
it doesn't really matter, whatever it was. The

00:16:54.330 --> 00:16:58.690
ship moved at approximately 40 times the speed

00:16:58.690 --> 00:17:00.850
of light, which is way beyond anything Earth

00:17:00.850 --> 00:17:04.809
scientists could even fully comprehend. That's

00:17:04.809 --> 00:17:08.569
insane. As for the human crew on the ship, they

00:17:08.569 --> 00:17:11.750
experienced a wide range of physical effects

00:17:11.750 --> 00:17:14.210
during the trip. They didn't float in zero gravity,

00:17:14.470 --> 00:17:16.329
which means the ship was generating its own gravity.

00:17:16.750 --> 00:17:19.430
They were able to walk, sleep, exercise during

00:17:19.430 --> 00:17:22.210
the trip, so that's nice. The journey wasn't

00:17:22.210 --> 00:17:24.170
without its challenges, though. Several team

00:17:24.170 --> 00:17:27.289
members reported persistent dizziness, disorientation,

00:17:27.289 --> 00:17:30.589
and recurring headaches. Symptoms that were probably

00:17:30.589 --> 00:17:32.569
caused by the fact that they were traveling 12

00:17:32.569 --> 00:17:35.509
billion miles a second in an alien craft suited

00:17:35.509 --> 00:17:37.970
for their environment. Or somebody swapped their

00:17:37.970 --> 00:17:39.930
tang out for blue dolphins, if you know what

00:17:39.930 --> 00:17:47.910
I'm saying. Remember that from Bad Boys 2? They

00:17:47.910 --> 00:17:51.329
had the blue dolphins. Yeah, I know. I got you.

00:17:51.369 --> 00:17:53.089
I got you. Great movie. Great movie. Just so

00:17:53.089 --> 00:17:56.809
you know, for those Americans that are listening

00:17:56.809 --> 00:18:00.769
to the show, 39 light years is a little over

00:18:00.769 --> 00:18:07.250
400 trillion football fields. Oh. Okay. You're

00:18:07.250 --> 00:18:09.029
welcome. I appreciate that. Were you listening

00:18:09.029 --> 00:18:10.509
to anything after that or were you just looking

00:18:10.509 --> 00:18:14.690
that up the entire time? No, I was doing the

00:18:14.690 --> 00:18:16.910
math. Gotcha. All right. That's what people,

00:18:17.029 --> 00:18:19.289
that's what like. Most people probably walk away

00:18:19.289 --> 00:18:21.609
from this. They'll be like, ah, check this out.

00:18:21.690 --> 00:18:24.589
That's a great factoid. That's a deal closer

00:18:24.589 --> 00:18:26.829
at a bar. You drop that fact, you're closing

00:18:26.829 --> 00:18:31.690
the deal. That's the art of the deal, baby. Something

00:18:31.690 --> 00:18:33.269
the fucking Americans apparently can't figure

00:18:33.269 --> 00:18:34.470
out what that is. Bring it back. Look at that,

00:18:34.690 --> 00:18:38.609
man. Right? I like that. Now, as far as the crew's

00:18:38.609 --> 00:18:40.960
accommodations on the ship. The Americans had

00:18:40.960 --> 00:18:43.980
sleeping quarters, food storage areas, and space

00:18:43.980 --> 00:18:45.900
to store all their equipment and supplies. They

00:18:45.900 --> 00:18:48.660
also began the process of adapting to ebb and

00:18:48.660 --> 00:18:51.539
food while traveling by gradually mixing it in

00:18:51.539 --> 00:18:54.299
with their food to try and help minimize digestive

00:18:54.299 --> 00:18:58.059
shock when they got there. Spoiler alert. Non

00:18:58.059 --> 00:19:01.809
-Marvel spoiler alert. It didn't happen. Now,

00:19:01.930 --> 00:19:05.309
by early 1966, the ship finally entered the Zeta

00:19:05.309 --> 00:19:07.410
Reticuli system. Now, as they approached their

00:19:07.410 --> 00:19:10.109
destination, the team observed a binary star

00:19:10.109 --> 00:19:12.670
system. That means two suns, for those of you

00:19:12.670 --> 00:19:16.549
who might be unfamiliar with that term. And for

00:19:16.549 --> 00:19:18.269
those of you conservatives, don't worry. There's

00:19:18.269 --> 00:19:20.630
no pronouns involved, you fucking mongoloids.

00:19:22.630 --> 00:19:25.410
Yeah, I had a bathroom joke on deck, but you

00:19:25.410 --> 00:19:28.630
beat me to it. Well, sorry. He's a bathroom joke,

00:19:28.670 --> 00:19:32.640
too, because I kind of want to know, like, How

00:19:32.640 --> 00:19:35.160
did the food affect him when it came to pooping?

00:19:35.160 --> 00:19:37.339
Oh, don't worry. We're going to get there. Oh,

00:19:37.339 --> 00:19:40.240
that's in here? I'm very excited. We'll cover

00:19:40.240 --> 00:19:45.599
that in detail. You just lit up the... I'm going

00:19:45.599 --> 00:19:48.319
to talk about shit very soon here, guys. Dude,

00:19:48.319 --> 00:19:52.400
I told you that this episode is very information

00:19:52.400 --> 00:19:55.700
heavy. So any questions you might have will probably

00:19:55.700 --> 00:19:59.630
be answered as we go down. Sarge, to go back

00:19:59.630 --> 00:20:01.309
to what you were saying, even though it is a

00:20:01.309 --> 00:20:03.369
binary star system, there are still genders.

00:20:03.410 --> 00:20:05.670
There was one slightly larger sun, that is the

00:20:05.670 --> 00:20:09.890
male sun. It is larger and more yellow. Pronouns

00:20:09.890 --> 00:20:13.230
are he, him. The smaller one is the female, and

00:20:13.230 --> 00:20:14.789
that is orange. I also made that up. They're

00:20:14.789 --> 00:20:17.049
just two different suns. There's no genders.

00:20:17.130 --> 00:20:19.670
I just wanted to say that. Ben Shapiro has something

00:20:19.670 --> 00:20:28.109
he'd like to say. So they saw the two suns kind

00:20:28.109 --> 00:20:32.150
of like Tatooine style, I guess. And then they

00:20:32.150 --> 00:20:34.309
finally saw the planet that would be their home

00:20:34.309 --> 00:20:36.210
for the next few years, a planet that they would

00:20:36.210 --> 00:20:42.569
come to call Serpo. So Serpo kind of sucks. It's

00:20:42.569 --> 00:20:46.410
just a super harsh environment. So being a binary

00:20:46.410 --> 00:20:49.329
star system. The only fast food chain is Hardee's.

00:20:52.519 --> 00:20:54.960
But it sucks because even though it's a binary

00:20:54.960 --> 00:20:57.000
SAR system, it's not like Tatooine where they're

00:20:57.000 --> 00:20:59.680
both in the sky at the same time. It's just in

00:20:59.680 --> 00:21:04.400
constant sunlight. Oh, so perpetual daylight?

00:21:04.579 --> 00:21:09.359
And it's oppressive sunlight. And the temperature

00:21:09.359 --> 00:21:13.220
is exceeding up to 110 degrees in most regions.

00:21:13.460 --> 00:21:15.759
And even with protective gear, the brightness

00:21:15.759 --> 00:21:18.279
caused severe eye strain and several members

00:21:18.279 --> 00:21:21.579
suffered. from acute sunburn, some getting even

00:21:21.579 --> 00:21:23.680
second -degree burns within hours of arrival.

00:21:24.079 --> 00:21:26.039
Not great. It's kind of like, what was that movie

00:21:26.039 --> 00:21:27.740
with Vin Diesel, Pitch Black? It's like that,

00:21:27.819 --> 00:21:31.039
but if it never turned dark. Okay. Yeah, it's

00:21:31.039 --> 00:21:33.200
like 30 Days of Night with Josh Hartnett if it

00:21:33.200 --> 00:21:37.539
was 30 days, 30 ,000 light -year days of light.

00:21:38.339 --> 00:21:43.960
Exactly. 400 trillion football fields of light.

00:21:45.049 --> 00:21:46.809
Dave, I'm assuming you're going to tell me this

00:21:46.809 --> 00:21:48.509
will be answered, but like right off the jump,

00:21:48.549 --> 00:21:53.630
I'm like, why this being, you know, that they

00:21:53.630 --> 00:21:56.109
swapped with, isn't this the type of pertinent

00:21:56.109 --> 00:21:58.210
information you think you'd want to like, Hey,

00:21:58.269 --> 00:22:00.690
not only do you have to adjust to the dietary

00:22:00.690 --> 00:22:03.750
issues and such, but like, it's going to be fucking

00:22:03.750 --> 00:22:06.630
hot. You know, what was challenging is that sunglasses

00:22:06.630 --> 00:22:11.250
weren't invented until the 1980s. And so that

00:22:11.250 --> 00:22:16.480
was really challenging for them. Imagine that

00:22:16.480 --> 00:22:19.220
you're going to another planet that you know

00:22:19.220 --> 00:22:22.500
is a place you've never been before and not packing

00:22:22.500 --> 00:22:26.920
sunscreen or sunglasses. It was also before they

00:22:26.920 --> 00:22:29.000
made that sunscreen song, too, so no one really

00:22:29.000 --> 00:22:31.160
knew the benefits of it. That's true. You're

00:22:31.160 --> 00:22:33.700
right. Yeah, valid, valid. No, I think they knew.

00:22:33.880 --> 00:22:35.539
I mean, they had to have known they had to get

00:22:35.539 --> 00:22:37.319
used to the food because they did say that they

00:22:37.319 --> 00:22:39.990
started mixing their food. Like, while on the

00:22:39.990 --> 00:22:42.910
ship with their MREs to, like, kind of get used

00:22:42.910 --> 00:22:44.589
to it. They should have been hitting the tanning

00:22:44.589 --> 00:22:47.950
bed, though, as well. Yeah. Agreed. Yeah, as

00:22:47.950 --> 00:22:50.809
far as that, I have no idea how, like, they said

00:22:50.809 --> 00:22:53.029
they had protective gear. What that was, I don't

00:22:53.029 --> 00:22:55.150
know. Maybe, like, a sun shirt for, like, fat

00:22:55.150 --> 00:22:56.369
kids when they go into a pool. It was one of

00:22:56.369 --> 00:22:58.809
those, like, big floppy hats that middle -aged

00:22:58.809 --> 00:23:01.150
women wear when they guard you. Yeah, I don't

00:23:01.150 --> 00:23:02.349
know what that was. They had a pair of scissors

00:23:02.349 --> 00:23:04.170
so they could make all their outfits sleeveless.

00:23:04.750 --> 00:23:08.049
Yeah. I genuinely don't know what their preparation

00:23:08.049 --> 00:23:11.069
was. That wasn't in the quote -unquote leaked

00:23:11.069 --> 00:23:16.890
information. But there was also the atmosphere

00:23:16.890 --> 00:23:19.849
of Serpo, which also sucked. It was breathable,

00:23:19.910 --> 00:23:22.349
but it was much thinner than Earth's, causing

00:23:22.349 --> 00:23:25.069
shortness of breath, fatigue, and elevated heart

00:23:25.069 --> 00:23:27.509
rates. And it took several months before most

00:23:27.509 --> 00:23:29.089
of them were able to acclimate just to that.

00:23:29.230 --> 00:23:32.720
And then there were the digestive issues. They

00:23:32.720 --> 00:23:35.319
were almost immediate. The team had brought about

00:23:35.319 --> 00:23:38.119
two years worth of food from Earth, but the long

00:23:38.119 --> 00:23:40.420
-term goal was to transition to ebb and food

00:23:40.420 --> 00:23:43.880
sources. But early attempts to do so resulted

00:23:43.880 --> 00:23:48.200
in widespread gastrointestinal issues. Nausea,

00:23:48.200 --> 00:23:51.359
cramps, and chronic diarrhea hit everyone fast

00:23:51.359 --> 00:23:53.119
and hard to the point where a lot of them were

00:23:53.119 --> 00:23:56.220
almost dehydrated on a daily basis because you're

00:23:56.220 --> 00:23:57.980
combining that with also the oppressive heat.

00:23:58.490 --> 00:24:01.569
Not great. The Evans did try to help through

00:24:01.569 --> 00:24:04.329
modified food prep, and they even tried to synthesize

00:24:04.329 --> 00:24:07.150
more Earth -like foods, but it still took almost

00:24:07.150 --> 00:24:10.769
a year before they could eat their food without

00:24:10.769 --> 00:24:13.210
having full -on prolapses from shitting themselves

00:24:13.210 --> 00:24:15.950
so much. That's how aggressive it was. Look,

00:24:15.950 --> 00:24:18.809
I don't want to be disrespectful, but at the

00:24:18.809 --> 00:24:21.750
same time, all of the hardships you're currently

00:24:21.750 --> 00:24:24.109
describing were the things I experienced when

00:24:24.109 --> 00:24:28.460
I went to Iraq. Literally all of it. I was going

00:24:28.460 --> 00:24:31.259
to say, it sounds like par for the course when

00:24:31.259 --> 00:24:37.359
all you have to eat is hearty. But even right

00:24:37.359 --> 00:24:41.740
down to the gastrointestinal distress. It's such

00:24:41.740 --> 00:24:44.799
a great phrase, too. Gastrointestinal distress

00:24:44.799 --> 00:24:49.079
really rolls off the tongue. That's actually

00:24:49.079 --> 00:24:52.740
the name that Taco Bell chose for their house

00:24:52.740 --> 00:24:54.740
band. I was going to say, it sounds like a gore

00:24:54.740 --> 00:24:57.059
grind band, and one that I would see on a regular

00:24:57.059 --> 00:25:00.539
basis if they played live. Oh, yeah. Yeah, Liv

00:25:00.539 --> 00:25:05.480
Moss. Here's some baby wipes. No, as far as living

00:25:05.480 --> 00:25:09.559
arrangements, they were fine. The Evans initially

00:25:09.559 --> 00:25:11.920
provided like temporary housing near where they

00:25:11.920 --> 00:25:13.720
had landed, which was near the equator, which

00:25:13.720 --> 00:25:16.240
was also the hottest fucking region of the planet

00:25:16.240 --> 00:25:19.980
at about 110 plus degrees Fahrenheit. It was

00:25:19.980 --> 00:25:22.039
nothing special. They were just like little.

00:25:22.380 --> 00:25:25.000
basic structures uh they were climate controlled

00:25:25.000 --> 00:25:27.319
and they were a place to like escape the harsh

00:25:27.319 --> 00:25:29.700
sunlight but within the first year they were

00:25:29.700 --> 00:25:32.079
able to work with the evans to build a more permanent

00:25:32.079 --> 00:25:34.880
base up north where it was less of like a scorched

00:25:34.880 --> 00:25:37.119
hellscape i think it said like the temperatures

00:25:37.119 --> 00:25:39.940
there range between like 80 and 90 which is like

00:25:39.940 --> 00:25:43.460
better it's not too bad but it's yeah but consistent

00:25:43.460 --> 00:25:46.680
you know what i mean yeah and it was a dry heat

00:25:46.680 --> 00:25:49.420
you know what i mean it's a dry heat I love when

00:25:49.420 --> 00:25:50.880
people say that, and it's like, you know what?

00:25:51.059 --> 00:25:53.140
It's still fucking hot. Oh, it's awful. You're

00:25:53.140 --> 00:25:54.619
still going to sweat. You're going to hate your

00:25:54.619 --> 00:25:56.880
life, regardless of whether it's dry or wet.

00:25:57.059 --> 00:25:59.960
Yeah. I remember I went to Vegas, and that's

00:25:59.960 --> 00:26:01.700
a dry heat, and it sucks because there's no,

00:26:01.740 --> 00:26:04.539
you can't escape it. It's a dry heat because

00:26:04.539 --> 00:26:07.000
there's no clouds. Yeah, it feels like you're

00:26:07.000 --> 00:26:10.440
walking into an oven. Evan sounds like it fucking

00:26:10.440 --> 00:26:13.660
sucks. It's not great. It's not ideal for anyone

00:26:13.660 --> 00:26:16.759
involved. It sounds a lot like Orlando, to be

00:26:16.759 --> 00:26:21.539
honest. Less humid, though. But despite all the

00:26:21.539 --> 00:26:23.920
shitting and sunburns, Serpo was pretty peaceful.

00:26:24.359 --> 00:26:29.000
Was that in your friggin' write -up there? You

00:26:29.000 --> 00:26:31.099
wrote that down. Despite all the shitting and

00:26:31.099 --> 00:26:37.160
sunburns. Actually, I do need to interject here.

00:26:37.779 --> 00:26:41.759
When I got overseas, I tried Iraqi food for the

00:26:41.759 --> 00:26:45.349
first time, and it was a mistake. And it happened

00:26:45.349 --> 00:26:47.950
to be during a heat wave that I had tried this

00:26:47.950 --> 00:26:50.170
Iraqi food, a heat wave in October, by the way.

00:26:50.190 --> 00:26:54.250
Oh, yeah. And we didn't have bathrooms on our

00:26:54.250 --> 00:26:57.109
base. We just had porta potties. And I got to

00:26:57.109 --> 00:26:59.089
tell you, you learn a lot about yourself as a

00:26:59.089 --> 00:27:01.589
man when you have to shit in a porta potty in

00:27:01.589 --> 00:27:06.369
110 degree heat. You immediately start sweating.

00:27:06.490 --> 00:27:08.829
You walk into the pool. You haven't even pulled

00:27:08.829 --> 00:27:10.569
your pants down yet and you're already sweating.

00:27:10.589 --> 00:27:12.690
This is what I've been hearing from my kid because

00:27:12.690 --> 00:27:15.289
he's at summer camp right now. We've been having

00:27:15.289 --> 00:27:17.890
little streaks of these 100 degree days and they

00:27:17.890 --> 00:27:20.990
have one port -o -potty there and it's like 100

00:27:20.990 --> 00:27:25.829
first through fifth graders. He's just like...

00:27:25.829 --> 00:27:28.069
I don't think he's had a bowel movement in 9

00:27:28.069 --> 00:27:31.839
or 10 days, I'll be honest. he's he's a smart

00:27:31.839 --> 00:27:33.660
boy yeah i'm like dude that used to be me but

00:27:33.660 --> 00:27:35.819
at least i was like high on dope at least i had

00:27:35.819 --> 00:27:38.859
a good like other side of the coin you had a

00:27:38.859 --> 00:27:41.960
good reason to not be shitting yeah yeah so basically

00:27:41.960 --> 00:27:44.259
so basically what i'm hearing is that sarge your

00:27:44.259 --> 00:27:47.759
kid and everyone who went to woodstock 99 have

00:27:47.759 --> 00:27:51.519
all experienced porta potties on 110 degree days

00:27:51.519 --> 00:27:55.960
that's what Punishment. All right, so I'm going

00:27:55.960 --> 00:27:58.220
to get back to this now. You guys ready? So despite

00:27:58.220 --> 00:28:00.880
all the shitting and sunburns, Serpo was pretty

00:28:00.880 --> 00:28:03.680
peaceful. There it is again. Go on. The Edmonds

00:28:03.680 --> 00:28:07.039
were super welcoming. They assisted with acclimation,

00:28:07.079 --> 00:28:09.559
provided medical support when needed. There was

00:28:09.559 --> 00:28:11.680
no signs of, like, hostility or them being, like,

00:28:11.680 --> 00:28:13.839
territorial. If anything, they were, like, genuinely

00:28:13.839 --> 00:28:17.279
invested. Pretty much, yeah. Oh, dude, this turns

00:28:17.279 --> 00:28:19.740
into a woke liberal night, like, hellscape. You

00:28:19.740 --> 00:28:23.619
just wait. So you're saying I can't say the R

00:28:23.619 --> 00:28:26.900
word. Did we go over this? No. Okay. Yeah. I

00:28:26.900 --> 00:28:30.099
remember now. But I did make you a promise where

00:28:30.099 --> 00:28:32.339
I will bleep out three random words that you

00:28:32.339 --> 00:28:34.720
say to make you look like an asshole. Well, as

00:28:34.720 --> 00:28:43.779
long as you don't bleep out, I'll be fine. I've

00:28:43.779 --> 00:28:45.900
never heard that slur before, so I'm impressed.

00:28:46.099 --> 00:28:49.119
Yeah, I learned it in Orlando. They've got all

00:28:49.119 --> 00:28:51.220
sorts of fucked up stuff. It doesn't surprise

00:28:51.220 --> 00:28:55.319
me. But yeah, the Edmonds, if anything, they

00:28:55.319 --> 00:28:57.920
were genuinely invested in the success of the

00:28:57.920 --> 00:28:59.700
exchange program, and they freely offered up

00:28:59.700 --> 00:29:02.819
any resources or guidance they could. And during

00:29:02.819 --> 00:29:05.460
the initial acclimation phase, the American team...

00:29:05.720 --> 00:29:07.720
maintained structure and routine. The mission

00:29:07.720 --> 00:29:09.779
commander oversaw daily operations, assigned

00:29:09.779 --> 00:29:12.119
roles, and made sure that detailed logs were

00:29:12.119 --> 00:29:16.039
kept. The team recorded environmental data, surveyed

00:29:16.039 --> 00:29:18.180
the surrounding terrain, and documented the ebb

00:29:18.180 --> 00:29:20.660
and customs and technology. Do you guys want

00:29:20.660 --> 00:29:23.359
to learn what they learned? Yeah, of course.

00:29:23.599 --> 00:29:27.859
Yeah. Don't all get so excited. Jesus Christ.

00:29:28.240 --> 00:29:30.099
I am excited. I know this is going to be like

00:29:30.099 --> 00:29:31.859
a choose -your -own -adventure type deal. I'm

00:29:31.859 --> 00:29:34.519
here for it. All right, well, you pretty much

00:29:34.519 --> 00:29:36.240
know all there is to know about the planet. It's

00:29:36.240 --> 00:29:40.700
hot, constant suns blazing down. The breathable

00:29:40.700 --> 00:29:43.000
but super thin atmosphere. And as far as, like,

00:29:43.000 --> 00:29:45.259
water, there weren't any oceans or anything like

00:29:45.259 --> 00:29:47.839
that. There were some shallow lakes, small rivers,

00:29:47.920 --> 00:29:49.839
and all their drinking and, like, usable water

00:29:49.839 --> 00:29:52.019
came from wells and, like, underground rivers

00:29:52.019 --> 00:29:53.779
that were, like, super clean, apparently. Like,

00:29:53.799 --> 00:29:54.900
you didn't need to filter them at all. You could

00:29:54.900 --> 00:29:57.440
just drink it straight from the ground. Vegetation

00:29:57.440 --> 00:29:58.940
was pretty much the type of shit you would find

00:29:58.940 --> 00:30:02.549
in a desert, scrub bush, cacti. die -like plants

00:30:02.549 --> 00:30:05.190
and uh all their crops were like tuber bearing

00:30:05.190 --> 00:30:08.210
like they think like carrots yams potatoes yeah

00:30:08.210 --> 00:30:12.410
okay yeah and uh the evans grew them on on like

00:30:12.410 --> 00:30:15.750
communal farms animal life existed but it wasn't

00:30:15.750 --> 00:30:18.809
like super diverse like it was just kind of like

00:30:18.809 --> 00:30:20.809
the same all over kind of like you were playing

00:30:20.809 --> 00:30:23.809
like uh you're kind of like living in hampshire

00:30:23.809 --> 00:30:29.089
that too yeah Yeah, I have played No Man's Sky.

00:30:29.170 --> 00:30:31.890
Just raccoons, skunks, and possums. Yeah. Okay.

00:30:32.150 --> 00:30:33.970
You get a whole state dedicated to them. You

00:30:33.970 --> 00:30:36.430
get the occasional fisher cat. Come on. Yeah.

00:30:36.630 --> 00:30:39.650
Yeah, I don't know. I think those guys are border

00:30:39.650 --> 00:30:45.769
hoppers, I'll be honest. It did say that there

00:30:45.769 --> 00:30:51.089
was a group of big lizard -type creatures that

00:30:51.089 --> 00:30:54.900
the ebbins... They somehow turned into like,

00:30:54.900 --> 00:30:56.819
kind of like how we use horses to like plow fields

00:30:56.819 --> 00:30:59.039
and shit like that. That was the only thing that

00:30:59.039 --> 00:31:00.819
said that sounded actually kind of cool, but

00:31:00.819 --> 00:31:03.619
all this is kind of like boring. So culturally,

00:31:03.940 --> 00:31:06.160
the Edmonds were highly structured and peaceful.

00:31:06.400 --> 00:31:09.319
Their society had no currency, no crime, and

00:31:09.319 --> 00:31:12.279
no apparent class division. Sounds pretty woke,

00:31:12.460 --> 00:31:16.450
pretty liberal. Resources were shared communally,

00:31:16.450 --> 00:31:19.150
and each individual was assigned a role in their

00:31:19.150 --> 00:31:21.569
society based on aptitude that was determined

00:31:21.569 --> 00:31:25.089
at an early age. Local distribution centers provided

00:31:25.089 --> 00:31:27.569
all necessities like food, tools, and clothing,

00:31:27.710 --> 00:31:30.289
and there was no concept of private ownership.

00:31:31.430 --> 00:31:34.230
Every citizen contributed through work, whether

00:31:34.230 --> 00:31:37.369
in agriculture, engineering, education, or whatever.

00:31:37.910 --> 00:31:41.380
As far as governance... That was handled by a

00:31:41.380 --> 00:31:43.619
central quote -unquote council of governors,

00:31:43.900 --> 00:31:46.119
which is a group of elders who made decisions

00:31:46.119 --> 00:31:49.779
by consensus. There were no elections, no political

00:31:49.779 --> 00:31:52.240
factions, or any observed conflict within those

00:31:52.240 --> 00:31:55.539
things. The decision of the council was followed

00:31:55.539 --> 00:31:58.700
without resistance. I'll be honest, I would put

00:31:58.700 --> 00:32:00.819
up with the shitting and the heat for this. So

00:32:00.819 --> 00:32:03.700
this is like Cambridge, Massachusetts. It's like

00:32:03.700 --> 00:32:11.410
Venezuela. It sounds fucking awesome. Welcome

00:32:11.410 --> 00:32:19.309
to hot Vermont. Yeah. I mean, yeah, it sounds

00:32:19.309 --> 00:32:21.369
great. If Vermont had been moved to Arizona.

00:32:22.710 --> 00:32:25.089
Yeah, that actually sounds terrible when you

00:32:25.089 --> 00:32:28.309
put it that way. Yeah, a lot of farmer's markets.

00:32:29.490 --> 00:32:32.710
Just cacti fruit. Celebrating cultures that don't

00:32:32.710 --> 00:32:35.420
even exist in your state. Yeah. It's going to

00:32:35.420 --> 00:32:38.759
be great. Las Vegas, now more white people with

00:32:38.759 --> 00:32:46.079
threads. The Edmonds also practiced a form of

00:32:46.079 --> 00:32:48.599
religion centered around some sort of supreme

00:32:48.599 --> 00:32:51.380
being. It wasn't really described in detail.

00:32:51.779 --> 00:32:55.180
It was Jerry Garcia. Every settlement had a place

00:32:55.180 --> 00:32:57.519
of worship where daily rituals were observed.

00:32:58.410 --> 00:33:00.970
education was centralized the children were raised

00:33:00.970 --> 00:33:03.450
collectively and assigned this sounds so much

00:33:03.450 --> 00:33:05.950
like a hippie commune it is why it also sounds

00:33:05.950 --> 00:33:08.430
like we sound exactly like hot vermont we learn

00:33:08.430 --> 00:33:12.309
nothing from this trip though clearly is what

00:33:12.309 --> 00:33:15.089
i'm gathering as well go on we never do we we

00:33:15.089 --> 00:33:17.430
did an episode on valiant thor and like he did

00:33:17.430 --> 00:33:19.690
a bunch of these like hey guys come on like maybe

00:33:19.690 --> 00:33:21.430
you should not do it and they're like yeah fuck

00:33:21.430 --> 00:33:26.089
you alien What do you know? Richard Nixon's president.

00:33:26.210 --> 00:33:28.349
Get out of here. So the children were raised

00:33:28.349 --> 00:33:30.589
collectively and they were assigned educational

00:33:30.589 --> 00:33:34.289
paths based on their abilities. And once trained,

00:33:34.509 --> 00:33:37.170
Evans remained in that field for life. Did they

00:33:37.170 --> 00:33:41.230
have homeschooling there? I mean, it kind of

00:33:41.230 --> 00:33:43.309
sounds like it. It sounds like they just kind

00:33:43.309 --> 00:33:45.349
of all gathered in one place and someone taught

00:33:45.349 --> 00:33:50.089
them. But either way, the human team, they noted

00:33:50.089 --> 00:33:52.230
that the Evans children developed super quickly.

00:33:52.779 --> 00:33:55.019
They were self -sufficient at a very young age,

00:33:55.099 --> 00:33:57.299
and they were super intelligent, and the average

00:33:57.299 --> 00:34:00.940
ebb and IQ was estimated to be around 165. I

00:34:00.940 --> 00:34:02.680
don't know shit about IQs, and I don't know if

00:34:02.680 --> 00:34:05.180
that's high or not. That's pretty high, yeah.

00:34:05.299 --> 00:34:07.960
The average human IQ, if I understand correctly,

00:34:08.280 --> 00:34:12.539
is in the 100 range. Okay. Sure. Well, I'm going

00:34:12.539 --> 00:34:14.840
to go with you on this one. I think Adam Sandler

00:34:14.840 --> 00:34:16.900
brought that average down considerably, though.

00:34:19.239 --> 00:34:22.420
As for how the Evans communicated, it was a blend

00:34:22.420 --> 00:34:26.500
of spoken language and like empathic cues. The

00:34:26.500 --> 00:34:28.579
Evan language was tonal and difficult for the

00:34:28.579 --> 00:34:31.000
Americans like team to learn. But over several

00:34:31.000 --> 00:34:33.280
years, they had compiled a full English to Evan

00:34:33.280 --> 00:34:35.500
dictionary. And by the end of the stay, communication

00:34:35.500 --> 00:34:37.659
became pretty fluid. Like they were able to like.

00:34:38.039 --> 00:34:39.659
They didn't need a translator, nothing like that.

00:34:39.780 --> 00:34:42.420
These fucking overachievers. The Americans are

00:34:42.420 --> 00:34:44.500
up and they're like, when we're here, you'll

00:34:44.500 --> 00:34:47.619
speak our language, guys. In English, please.

00:34:49.599 --> 00:34:51.559
I can't believe we're on this planet with all

00:34:51.559 --> 00:34:54.280
these foreigners. It's crazy. I like that even

00:34:54.280 --> 00:34:57.460
in the 60s, Americans didn't travel well. We

00:34:57.460 --> 00:35:01.000
never have, dude. I mean, look at the way we

00:35:01.000 --> 00:35:03.360
got to America to begin with. That wouldn't be

00:35:03.360 --> 00:35:06.880
considered traveling well. I'm sorry you don't

00:35:06.880 --> 00:35:10.619
speak English, you fucking peasants. Right. All

00:35:10.619 --> 00:35:15.579
these fucking foreigners, dude. Fuck. Now, the

00:35:15.579 --> 00:35:19.000
team was granted full access to anything and

00:35:19.000 --> 00:35:21.719
anywhere they wanted to go. They traveled to

00:35:21.719 --> 00:35:24.920
various villages, industrial facilities, research

00:35:24.920 --> 00:35:27.280
outposts. The team was also provided a small

00:35:27.280 --> 00:35:29.820
anti -gravity craft that the American pilots

00:35:29.820 --> 00:35:32.280
learned to pilot. And they were able to explore

00:35:32.280 --> 00:35:34.360
the planet's surface, collect samples. Pretty

00:35:34.360 --> 00:35:39.219
much, yeah. Sick. Well, you know it's not a Tesla.

00:35:39.320 --> 00:35:41.099
It wouldn't have made it. No, I would have blown

00:35:41.099 --> 00:35:45.480
the fuck out of it. They were also exposed to

00:35:45.480 --> 00:35:47.800
broader interstellar networks that the Evans

00:35:47.800 --> 00:35:51.179
participated in. According to them, the Evans,

00:35:51.320 --> 00:35:52.760
they were in contact with nine of them. Like

00:35:52.760 --> 00:35:56.659
Spike TV? Pretty much, yeah. A Thousand Ways

00:35:56.659 --> 00:35:59.690
to Die, that kind of stuff. The Man Show. Yeah,

00:35:59.949 --> 00:36:02.429
yeah. Now, according to the Evans, they were

00:36:02.429 --> 00:36:05.130
in contact with nine other star systems. They

00:36:05.130 --> 00:36:07.909
even got to meet representatives from other extraterrestrial

00:36:07.909 --> 00:36:10.590
species, but details on the interactions were

00:36:10.590 --> 00:36:13.570
limited. So it's pretty safe to say that over

00:36:13.570 --> 00:36:16.530
the 13 years they were there, the Americans became,

00:36:16.769 --> 00:36:18.269
oh yeah, it was supposed to be 10 years, they

00:36:18.269 --> 00:36:20.500
were there for 13. Little longer than what it

00:36:20.500 --> 00:36:23.139
was supposed to be. The Americans became part

00:36:23.139 --> 00:36:24.780
of like the ebb and whirl. They weren't just

00:36:24.780 --> 00:36:27.039
observers, but they were now fully integrated

00:36:27.039 --> 00:36:30.320
into the alien civilization. But despite the

00:36:30.320 --> 00:36:32.739
team's ability to adapt to the environment and

00:36:32.739 --> 00:36:35.460
society. The mission was actually pretty rough

00:36:35.460 --> 00:36:40.139
at times. The prolonged exposure to the planet's

00:36:40.139 --> 00:36:42.699
conditions, the isolation from Earth, and just

00:36:42.699 --> 00:36:45.880
the sheer psychological weight of living among

00:36:45.880 --> 00:36:49.159
an alien species for over a decade created what

00:36:49.159 --> 00:36:54.239
some would call significant challenges, so to

00:36:54.239 --> 00:36:58.480
say. Of the original 12 members, two died in

00:36:58.480 --> 00:37:00.989
the first few years of the mission. According

00:37:00.989 --> 00:37:02.969
to the quote -unquote documents released by the

00:37:02.969 --> 00:37:06.369
whistleblower, one of the team members died from

00:37:06.369 --> 00:37:09.289
a pulmonary embolism not long after the group's

00:37:09.289 --> 00:37:12.010
arrival. The second succumbed due to injuries

00:37:12.010 --> 00:37:14.570
sustained during an outing, but details on what

00:37:14.570 --> 00:37:16.750
exactly happened to them is unclear. Some say

00:37:16.750 --> 00:37:18.889
he fucked himself up on some terrain. Others

00:37:18.889 --> 00:37:20.969
say an animal attacked him. I don't really know.

00:37:21.030 --> 00:37:23.329
He just shit out all of his internal organs.

00:37:25.630 --> 00:37:28.130
That is likely as well. Gastrointestinal distress

00:37:28.130 --> 00:37:32.690
rears its ugly head again. Yeah. So mental strain

00:37:32.690 --> 00:37:34.929
was another serious issue among the crew. Even

00:37:34.929 --> 00:37:36.429
though they were highly trained and psychologically

00:37:36.429 --> 00:37:38.530
screened, nothing could have really prepared

00:37:38.530 --> 00:37:41.130
them for the realities of life on like an alien

00:37:41.130 --> 00:37:43.869
world. The constant sunlight, the alien culture,

00:37:44.030 --> 00:37:47.090
the food, and the total absence of like the normal

00:37:47.090 --> 00:37:49.909
societal structures that we are used to. It all

00:37:49.909 --> 00:37:53.019
kind of wore on them. One member had to be relieved

00:37:53.019 --> 00:37:55.480
of duties for several months due to a psychological

00:37:55.480 --> 00:37:58.659
breakdown, and another attempted to isolate himself

00:37:58.659 --> 00:38:01.400
from both the team and the Evans and lived in

00:38:01.400 --> 00:38:04.559
near total isolation for over a year. I mean,

00:38:04.559 --> 00:38:07.300
I would have done that shit anyway. Yeah, right?

00:38:07.619 --> 00:38:09.559
Sounds like a good way to go. Time perception

00:38:09.559 --> 00:38:12.900
was also a major problem. Serpo had a 43 -hour

00:38:12.900 --> 00:38:15.179
day, and you combine that with the fact that

00:38:15.179 --> 00:38:17.099
there was never, like, a true night. It made

00:38:17.099 --> 00:38:19.739
standard Earth timekeeping pretty much impossible,

00:38:19.820 --> 00:38:21.980
and everyone's, like, circadian rhythms just

00:38:21.980 --> 00:38:23.820
went to shit. I don't know how much research

00:38:23.820 --> 00:38:26.940
you did, but can I ask, like, do you know how

00:38:26.940 --> 00:38:30.179
they know the difference between being a 43 -hour

00:38:30.179 --> 00:38:32.420
day? Like, how do you know it was a new day?

00:38:32.900 --> 00:38:37.199
Well, just rotation of the Earth. No, no, no.

00:38:38.179 --> 00:38:40.400
They weren't on Earth, David. How did the people

00:38:40.400 --> 00:38:42.780
on the planet know? I don't know. They fucking,

00:38:42.780 --> 00:38:43.300
they're scientists and shit, dude. Not like from

00:38:43.300 --> 00:38:46.760
outside the planet. I have no idea. Science?

00:38:48.460 --> 00:38:51.199
Well, I'm just saying, like, you know, was there,

00:38:51.239 --> 00:38:53.880
like, did one of the suns get really low in the

00:38:53.880 --> 00:38:55.699
sky? Like, I was just trying to figure it out.

00:38:55.739 --> 00:38:57.860
I would assume so. Fuck me for asking questions.

00:38:58.559 --> 00:39:00.739
There's just, like, one day there. It's just

00:39:00.739 --> 00:39:06.460
one day. Just... It's 43 hours. That's all I

00:39:06.460 --> 00:39:10.510
know. Okay. Good? All right. Okay. So without

00:39:10.510 --> 00:39:13.889
a strict routine, some members... 43 hours. So

00:39:13.889 --> 00:39:15.710
if they made that Ed Norton movie, there would

00:39:15.710 --> 00:39:23.230
be called the 44th hour. Fuck you, John. Pretty

00:39:23.230 --> 00:39:25.650
deep cut. Sorry about that. So without a strict

00:39:25.650 --> 00:39:27.449
routine, some members of the team lost track

00:39:27.449 --> 00:39:29.829
of days, weeks, even months. Their physical health

00:39:29.829 --> 00:39:32.630
deteriorated over time as well. Remember, this

00:39:32.630 --> 00:39:34.570
bitch has two sons, so the background radiation

00:39:34.570 --> 00:39:37.750
on Serpo was pretty high. Not enough to immediately

00:39:37.750 --> 00:39:40.929
kill you, but over time it did fuck them up.

00:39:41.110 --> 00:39:43.190
By the end of the mission, several of the teams

00:39:43.190 --> 00:39:47.250
showed signs of radiation illness, cellular damage,

00:39:47.610 --> 00:39:50.429
weakened immune systems, and unexplained internal

00:39:50.429 --> 00:39:54.030
conditions. Radiation illness? That's like, what

00:39:54.030 --> 00:39:55.429
did they have to listen to? Imagine Dragons?

00:39:57.630 --> 00:39:59.550
No, it's brain damage, bro. It's brain damage.

00:40:02.340 --> 00:40:05.159
Wait, sorry, he brought up Imagine Dragons. I

00:40:05.159 --> 00:40:07.440
gotta talk about this. I was once featured in

00:40:07.440 --> 00:40:10.000
an article including the lead singer of Imagine

00:40:10.000 --> 00:40:13.500
Dragons as he read mean tweets about him, including

00:40:13.500 --> 00:40:18.699
one of mine. Oh my, that's incredible. Sorry

00:40:18.699 --> 00:40:23.300
about closing the deal line. That's amazing.

00:40:23.840 --> 00:40:26.760
The tweet was, hey, this is a really good song.

00:40:27.420 --> 00:40:30.119
Oh no, what was it? I think it was something

00:40:30.119 --> 00:40:33.840
like This is a really good song is probably something

00:40:33.840 --> 00:40:38.840
Imagine Dragons has never heard. And then right

00:40:38.840 --> 00:40:41.139
after they posted my tweet, they had a thing

00:40:41.139 --> 00:40:43.760
from him where he talked about how hard it was.

00:40:45.800 --> 00:40:48.889
Dude, that guy is such a. My favorite quote from

00:40:48.889 --> 00:40:50.409
him, and I don't know if you get it, but like

00:40:50.409 --> 00:40:51.769
Imagine Dragons, you got to talk about it. He

00:40:51.769 --> 00:40:54.829
gave some interview years back where he's like,

00:40:55.010 --> 00:40:57.090
you know, we're here for the kids. And like,

00:40:57.170 --> 00:40:59.809
I never want like, you know, for our music, I

00:40:59.809 --> 00:41:02.070
never want any kid to ever be bullied because

00:41:02.070 --> 00:41:04.050
they listen to Imagine Dragons. It's like, dude,

00:41:04.110 --> 00:41:08.349
what? That's exclusively what's going to happen.

00:41:08.429 --> 00:41:10.469
Yeah, that's what's going to happen. Kids are

00:41:10.469 --> 00:41:16.179
really dying because of this band. God. When

00:41:16.179 --> 00:41:18.719
every song is one drum and a bunch of shouting,

00:41:18.840 --> 00:41:21.699
like, it's your own fault. Yeah, that's valid.

00:41:22.699 --> 00:41:26.739
All right. All right, so back to how this fucking

00:41:26.739 --> 00:41:30.960
planet ruined these people's lives. Right. Imagine

00:41:30.960 --> 00:41:37.119
Dragons toured there. Imagine Dragons is actually

00:41:37.119 --> 00:41:41.019
timeless, literally. There'll never not be a

00:41:41.019 --> 00:41:44.429
punchline. All right. So they're all getting

00:41:44.429 --> 00:41:46.230
fucked up by the sun. The radiation is causing

00:41:46.230 --> 00:41:49.789
their insides to turn to goo. Two of the surviving

00:41:49.789 --> 00:41:51.670
members who returned to Earth reportedly developed

00:41:51.670 --> 00:41:54.409
cancer within a decade. Others suffered from

00:41:54.409 --> 00:41:57.269
chronic fatigue, organ dysfunction, and neurological

00:41:57.269 --> 00:42:02.809
issues. And then, gentlemen, to make things worse,

00:42:03.550 --> 00:42:08.070
EBE2, the Eben representative who stayed on Earth,

00:42:08.269 --> 00:42:11.880
he died while the team was still on Serpo. which,

00:42:11.880 --> 00:42:13.840
thankfully, the Edmonds understood. How did he

00:42:13.840 --> 00:42:18.579
die? Fucking old age. Vigorous anal probing.

00:42:19.599 --> 00:42:22.099
How did he die? What did he tell the other kids

00:42:22.099 --> 00:42:24.099
at the alien school that he was an Imagine Dragons

00:42:24.099 --> 00:42:32.179
fan? Moment of silence for EBE2, all right? All

00:42:32.179 --> 00:42:35.000
right, it's enough of that. Thankfully, though,

00:42:35.059 --> 00:42:37.280
the Edmonds understood that shit happens, and

00:42:37.280 --> 00:42:39.480
it didn't start like an intergalactic crisis,

00:42:39.579 --> 00:42:42.639
so that's good. Like, that's okay, guys. Did

00:42:42.639 --> 00:42:46.780
he die of natural causes? I think so. It didn't

00:42:46.780 --> 00:42:48.920
say. I'm going to assume he just died the same

00:42:48.920 --> 00:42:50.440
way the other one did, which is probably a disease

00:42:50.440 --> 00:42:52.119
that he got from Earth, like smallpox or some

00:42:52.119 --> 00:42:54.599
shit like that. Either that or he tried to score

00:42:54.599 --> 00:42:58.139
in Baltimore, you know? Yeah, he's just all fucks.

00:42:58.239 --> 00:43:06.260
Yo, that's an actual awful move. I know somebody

00:43:06.260 --> 00:43:10.530
who... Anyway, go on. All right. So, yeah, so

00:43:10.530 --> 00:43:12.730
by the time the mission was nearing its end,

00:43:12.869 --> 00:43:15.889
morale had splintered. Some were eager to return

00:43:15.889 --> 00:43:17.989
home, while others had grown pretty deeply connected

00:43:17.989 --> 00:43:20.110
to the Edmund Society and seriously considered

00:43:20.110 --> 00:43:25.309
staying. Now, ultimately, in 1978, 13 years after

00:43:25.309 --> 00:43:27.510
they left Earth, two members of the team were

00:43:27.510 --> 00:43:30.050
dead. Two decided to stay behind, and the remaining

00:43:30.050 --> 00:43:33.110
eight of the original 12 returned to Earth. They

00:43:33.110 --> 00:43:35.250
were returned via Edmund Craft to the same Nevada

00:43:35.250 --> 00:43:37.739
site that they had departed from. obviously older,

00:43:37.900 --> 00:43:40.079
physically worn, and psychologically changed.

00:43:40.300 --> 00:43:42.519
Now, according to quote -unquote leaked documents,

00:43:42.840 --> 00:43:45.179
their physical condition was generally stable.

00:43:45.900 --> 00:43:48.760
There were obvious signs of long -term strain,

00:43:48.880 --> 00:43:50.659
and like I said, several of them were showing

00:43:50.659 --> 00:43:53.219
signs of radiation exposure. And then they were

00:43:53.219 --> 00:43:56.780
immediately taken to a classified military facility

00:43:56.780 --> 00:44:00.239
where they were subjected to intensive debriefing

00:44:00.239 --> 00:44:03.320
and a very lengthy quarantine process. Medical

00:44:03.320 --> 00:44:05.519
evaluations were conducted over the course of

00:44:05.519 --> 00:44:07.920
months, including physical, psychological and

00:44:07.920 --> 00:44:12.260
neurological assessments. And their testimonies

00:44:12.260 --> 00:44:14.500
were recorded in detail, including thousands

00:44:14.500 --> 00:44:17.199
of pages of handwritten notes, maps, sketches

00:44:17.199 --> 00:44:20.280
and environmental data from Serpo. Each member

00:44:20.280 --> 00:44:23.260
was debriefed individually and then as a group,

00:44:23.300 --> 00:44:26.019
while military scientists collected and analyzed

00:44:26.019 --> 00:44:28.500
like biological and technological samples brought

00:44:28.500 --> 00:44:31.480
back. They found that some of the recovery materials

00:44:31.480 --> 00:44:33.539
were so advanced that they couldn't be reverse

00:44:33.539 --> 00:44:37.239
engineered, while others just degraded or failed

00:44:37.239 --> 00:44:40.539
under Earth's atmosphere. As far as the crew's

00:44:40.539 --> 00:44:44.519
reintegration into human society... It was pretty

00:44:44.519 --> 00:44:47.739
rough. They had been gone for 13 years, like

00:44:47.739 --> 00:44:50.500
the whole world changed. But also, if you'll

00:44:50.500 --> 00:44:53.000
remember, many of the crew had been declared

00:44:53.000 --> 00:44:56.460
dead or missing during classified operations,

00:44:56.639 --> 00:44:58.840
quote unquote. So everyone in their lives had

00:44:58.840 --> 00:45:02.179
moved on. Family, friends, colleagues, they just.

00:45:02.860 --> 00:45:06.039
were no longer around. And even worse than that,

00:45:06.059 --> 00:45:07.599
they came back and were sounding like a bunch

00:45:07.599 --> 00:45:11.280
of commies, pinko b****es. Yeah. Even worse.

00:45:11.599 --> 00:45:13.440
Right, this is the worst time to come back to,

00:45:13.480 --> 00:45:15.360
like the height of the Cold War. They're just

00:45:15.360 --> 00:45:19.460
like, hey man. I'm going to Venezuela. Have you

00:45:19.460 --> 00:45:24.039
heard about communal living, bro? I'm moving

00:45:24.039 --> 00:45:27.000
to Vermont. Oh, this has to tie into the McCarthy

00:45:27.000 --> 00:45:34.320
stuff somehow. I'm sure. Yeah. So they, I missed

00:45:34.320 --> 00:45:37.340
it. Did you say how many survived initially?

00:45:37.719 --> 00:45:41.460
They all came back, right? So two died and eight

00:45:41.460 --> 00:45:44.840
came home. Two stayed on, am I right? Yeah, so

00:45:44.840 --> 00:45:46.840
two stayed on the planet. Two died, two stayed,

00:45:47.019 --> 00:45:49.420
only eight came back. So it was only eight of

00:45:49.420 --> 00:45:50.260
them that came back. But the eight came back

00:45:50.260 --> 00:45:54.340
and people were like, who are you guys? Well,

00:45:54.340 --> 00:45:56.559
so they were given new identities. They were

00:45:56.559 --> 00:45:59.869
given pensions. And obviously like very. And

00:45:59.869 --> 00:46:09.010
they all formed the band Fish. Yeah, Dave, you've

00:46:09.010 --> 00:46:12.769
really brushed over the most critical issue with

00:46:12.769 --> 00:46:16.969
radiation sickening is jamming. Bro, could you

00:46:16.969 --> 00:46:19.570
imagine if Fish was just one big psyop, dude?

00:46:21.730 --> 00:46:26.110
It tracks. Nobody wants to listen to a 20 -minute

00:46:26.110 --> 00:46:31.710
jam session. That's what it is. Yeah. All right,

00:46:31.730 --> 00:46:34.570
so they're given new identities, pensions, and

00:46:34.570 --> 00:46:36.690
they were given very strict orders to shut the

00:46:36.690 --> 00:46:39.130
fuck up about what they had done and where they

00:46:39.130 --> 00:46:42.989
had been. That didn't help. Most, if not all,

00:46:43.030 --> 00:46:44.889
that returned struggled with depression, isolation,

00:46:45.329 --> 00:46:48.510
and deteriorating health. As for the two who

00:46:48.510 --> 00:46:51.030
decided to stay on Serpo, they were never heard

00:46:51.030 --> 00:46:53.869
from again. According to an Eben communication

00:46:53.869 --> 00:46:56.409
received years later, they had fully integrated

00:46:56.409 --> 00:46:58.989
into Eben society and they were thriving, but

00:46:58.989 --> 00:47:02.250
who really knows? They had a bunch of fucked

00:47:02.250 --> 00:47:04.849
up kids. Dude, I didn't even think about it.

00:47:05.130 --> 00:47:08.400
They had inner bread. I genuinely didn't even

00:47:08.400 --> 00:47:14.340
think about the fucking interbreed. I mean, you

00:47:14.340 --> 00:47:17.719
gotta get that nut. I mean, what else? I mean,

00:47:17.739 --> 00:47:20.639
maybe that's how you explain why the girl from

00:47:20.639 --> 00:47:22.599
The Queen's Gambit has eyes that look like aliens.

00:47:23.420 --> 00:47:25.980
Yeah, well, that's also where Ted Cruz came from,

00:47:26.019 --> 00:47:34.019
so... Failure all around. So, officially, obviously...

00:47:34.460 --> 00:47:37.440
There's no public record of Project Serpo that

00:47:37.440 --> 00:47:40.579
exists. The DOD and the Air Force have never

00:47:40.579 --> 00:47:42.940
acknowledged the project, and no documentation

00:47:42.940 --> 00:47:46.039
has ever been declassified. Now, it should come

00:47:46.039 --> 00:47:48.960
as no surprise that all the information that

00:47:48.960 --> 00:47:51.119
exists, the logs, the reports, the personnel

00:47:51.119 --> 00:47:54.119
files, comes exclusively from anonymous leaks

00:47:54.119 --> 00:47:56.719
on the internet from a source using the very

00:47:56.719 --> 00:48:01.719
creative alias, Anonymous. Well, I say we get

00:48:01.719 --> 00:48:04.079
one more week of this Epstein stuff and they're

00:48:04.079 --> 00:48:08.639
going to release that info. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Well,

00:48:08.739 --> 00:48:10.239
I mean, they already said they're going to release

00:48:10.239 --> 00:48:15.000
concrete evidence that aliens exist. It's crazy

00:48:15.000 --> 00:48:18.960
on that. Like, I was reading in threads like

00:48:18.960 --> 00:48:21.500
12 hours before that announcement, people making

00:48:21.500 --> 00:48:23.739
that joke, being like, they're going to literally

00:48:23.739 --> 00:48:26.920
announce aliens. And then. Yeah, because that's

00:48:26.920 --> 00:48:29.639
exactly what's going to happen. So yeah, so in

00:48:29.639 --> 00:48:32.980
late 2005, Project Serpo blew up in conspiracy

00:48:32.980 --> 00:48:35.460
circles when a series of anonymous emails started

00:48:35.460 --> 00:48:38.059
popping up on a private UFO discussion list.

00:48:38.780 --> 00:48:41.360
It's basically like an invite -only email group

00:48:41.360 --> 00:48:43.940
for researchers, former military and UFO enthusiasts.

00:48:44.219 --> 00:48:46.940
And it was moderated by a guy named Victor Martinez,

00:48:47.460 --> 00:48:50.099
a former government employee. Now, the sender

00:48:50.099 --> 00:48:53.420
of the emails... Anonymous claimed to be a retired

00:48:53.420 --> 00:48:56.679
senior defense intelligence agency official and

00:48:56.679 --> 00:48:59.260
began dropping detailed information about a top

00:48:59.260 --> 00:49:01.760
secret human alien exchange program that had

00:49:01.760 --> 00:49:05.099
allegedly allegedly been buried since the 1970s.

00:49:05.099 --> 00:49:07.420
And this program would grow up to be the T app.

00:49:11.900 --> 00:49:16.099
The emails contained elaborate timelines, details

00:49:16.099 --> 00:49:19.119
of the Serpo mission, stats of the planet, crew

00:49:19.119 --> 00:49:21.780
biographies. Ebbing societal structure is all

00:49:21.780 --> 00:49:24.320
that kind of bullshit. With all this information,

00:49:24.599 --> 00:49:26.719
it didn't take long for the story to blow up

00:49:26.719 --> 00:49:29.780
online. So UFO forums, conspiracy blogs, and

00:49:29.780 --> 00:49:32.059
early paranormal podcasts all latched onto the

00:49:32.059 --> 00:49:36.230
story. There's even like a crude... crude official

00:49:36.230 --> 00:49:40.170
-looking website, Serpo .org. That was created...

00:49:40.170 --> 00:49:45.809
Serpo .geocities .org. It's all green text on

00:49:45.809 --> 00:49:48.010
black background. It's just an angel fire site.

00:49:48.070 --> 00:49:53.829
That's all it is. This was created to... All

00:49:53.829 --> 00:50:01.119
the paragraphs are in the shape of a UFO. So

00:50:01.119 --> 00:50:03.719
this was created to archive the drops. It's like

00:50:03.719 --> 00:50:07.400
an earlier and way nerdier version of QAnon.

00:50:07.519 --> 00:50:12.679
There'd be drops so often, and it'd be archived

00:50:12.679 --> 00:50:14.980
on a site. But for many in the UFO community,

00:50:15.280 --> 00:50:19.380
this was like the holy grail of UFO information.

00:50:20.019 --> 00:50:22.820
But this is where it gets good. A man by the

00:50:22.820 --> 00:50:25.800
name of Richard C. Doughty, a former Air Force

00:50:25.800 --> 00:50:28.260
Office of Special Investigations agent, infamous

00:50:28.260 --> 00:50:30.739
for his role in disinformation campaigns during

00:50:30.739 --> 00:50:33.320
the 1980s, was eventually linked to all this

00:50:33.320 --> 00:50:36.320
material. Dottie had previously been involved

00:50:36.320 --> 00:50:38.980
in the Paul Benowitz case, where he fed false

00:50:38.980 --> 00:50:41.800
alien intel to a civilian research, leading him

00:50:41.800 --> 00:50:45.119
to have a mental breakdown. God damn it. He was

00:50:45.119 --> 00:50:47.800
also tied to the infamous Majestic 12 documents,

00:50:48.159 --> 00:50:50.139
which were a set of allegedly leaked government

00:50:50.139 --> 00:50:52.960
memos that claimed a secret group was managing

00:50:52.960 --> 00:50:56.079
extraterrestrial contact and is widely considered

00:50:56.079 --> 00:50:59.800
to be a hoax. In fact, MJ -12 is believed by

00:50:59.800 --> 00:51:02.420
many to be one of the most elaborate disinformation

00:51:02.420 --> 00:51:06.480
operations in UFO history. So, Dottie's connection

00:51:06.480 --> 00:51:10.260
to Serpo only deepened people's suspicion that

00:51:10.260 --> 00:51:13.980
the entire saga might be a calculated fabrication

00:51:13.980 --> 00:51:17.119
or psychological operation, or as the kids call

00:51:17.119 --> 00:51:21.880
it, a psyop. Now, Dottie has never confirmed

00:51:21.880 --> 00:51:24.900
or denied his involvement in Serpo because fucking

00:51:24.900 --> 00:51:27.960
why would he? Yeah, of course. But he has danced

00:51:27.960 --> 00:51:30.559
around it in interviews for years, and the Serpo

00:51:30.559 --> 00:51:32.960
leaks had all the hallmarks of a good conspiracy.

00:51:33.440 --> 00:51:35.960
Anonymous government insiders, dead scientists,

00:51:36.480 --> 00:51:39.440
black budget programs, and aliens who were just

00:51:39.440 --> 00:51:41.860
a little too cooperative with the U .S. government.

00:51:42.699 --> 00:51:46.019
Still, UFO researchers are split on it. Some

00:51:46.019 --> 00:51:48.420
hailed it as one of the most credible whistleblower

00:51:48.420 --> 00:51:52.860
dumps ever. Others, including respected figures

00:51:52.860 --> 00:51:55.320
in the field like Stanton Friedman, dismissed

00:51:55.320 --> 00:51:58.059
it whole hog saying that it's just a part of

00:51:58.059 --> 00:52:00.559
a long tradition of government psyops and ufo

00:52:00.559 --> 00:52:02.980
mythology being used to confuse distract and

00:52:02.980 --> 00:52:05.719
entertain that comes back to the ufo ufo mythology

00:52:05.719 --> 00:52:08.260
thing i was saying the zeta reticuli thing like

00:52:08.260 --> 00:52:11.579
it's already been established in multiple abduction

00:52:11.579 --> 00:52:16.059
cases so why not use it here right sarge you're

00:52:16.059 --> 00:52:17.739
not paying attention at all i'm really mad about

00:52:17.739 --> 00:52:19.260
this to be honest with you i'm kind of pissed

00:52:19.260 --> 00:52:24.730
off this motherfucker i this this This was an

00:52:24.730 --> 00:52:28.489
exciting fucking story, and this goddamn douchebag

00:52:28.489 --> 00:52:33.269
ruined it. Well, he didn't ruin it. He created

00:52:33.269 --> 00:52:35.650
it. Well, that's what I mean. He fucking ruined

00:52:35.650 --> 00:52:37.929
it by creating it, the son of a bitch. Yeah,

00:52:37.969 --> 00:52:40.809
but, like, a really good government scythe, like,

00:52:40.889 --> 00:52:43.909
they'll, like, you know, this guy's known to

00:52:43.909 --> 00:52:45.969
have a bunch of proven scythes, but, like, one

00:52:45.969 --> 00:52:47.690
of them's gotta be true, because that's, like,

00:52:47.710 --> 00:52:51.510
the ultimate dupe. So, like, this could be that

00:52:51.510 --> 00:52:55.559
one. I guess. I mean, I get what you're saying.

00:52:55.639 --> 00:52:57.500
To be honest, this actually plays in... Oh, I'm

00:52:57.500 --> 00:52:58.820
sorry, go ahead. No, I'm just saying I get it.

00:52:59.500 --> 00:53:01.980
You could put this information out and people

00:53:01.980 --> 00:53:03.920
would just assume it's a psyop because everything

00:53:03.920 --> 00:53:07.059
else has been a psyop. Right. I get it, yeah.

00:53:07.179 --> 00:53:12.239
But also, fuck that guy. So this actually plays

00:53:12.239 --> 00:53:14.920
into a theory that I've had for a long... Well,

00:53:15.019 --> 00:53:18.280
it wasn't my theory, but one that I agreed with

00:53:18.280 --> 00:53:21.119
for a long time. It's that... The government

00:53:21.119 --> 00:53:24.239
would rather you believe this was aliens than

00:53:24.239 --> 00:53:26.480
to actually tell you what it really was, which

00:53:26.480 --> 00:53:30.139
is like some, you know, fucking high -tech military

00:53:30.139 --> 00:53:33.880
equipment. But this is nothing of that. Like,

00:53:33.880 --> 00:53:36.659
there's no... Well, no, they're just perpetuating

00:53:36.659 --> 00:53:39.619
it. I guess. Like, this is the kind of shit that

00:53:39.619 --> 00:53:42.219
the people who go and hang out at Area 51 and

00:53:42.219 --> 00:53:45.860
take photographs fall for head over heels. And

00:53:45.860 --> 00:53:48.829
so when they're like, oh, you know, I... believed

00:53:48.829 --> 00:53:50.809
in this and then you're like well i kind of made

00:53:50.809 --> 00:53:53.010
it up and then they're like oh okay and then

00:53:53.010 --> 00:53:55.429
everyone's like oh this guy's full of shit because

00:53:55.429 --> 00:53:57.670
he believed that everyone went to another planet

00:53:57.670 --> 00:54:01.849
and into bread with aliens this one is like it's

00:54:01.849 --> 00:54:05.190
like extra extraordinary as far as like the different

00:54:05.190 --> 00:54:07.889
levels to it like going there people getting

00:54:07.889 --> 00:54:09.670
integrated in the culture just the whole like

00:54:09.670 --> 00:54:12.710
travel back and like them coming back i mean

00:54:12.710 --> 00:54:17.030
that's all um that's pretty awesome I want to

00:54:17.030 --> 00:54:19.150
believe. I feel like it. I want to believe it

00:54:19.150 --> 00:54:21.289
too because it's so cool. It's really cool. I

00:54:21.289 --> 00:54:23.510
just feel like there's too much information.

00:54:24.329 --> 00:54:26.590
You know what I mean? Like there's too many details

00:54:26.590 --> 00:54:29.789
where it sounds like it's like when you're lying

00:54:29.789 --> 00:54:32.449
and you add too many details. But see, that's

00:54:32.449 --> 00:54:33.809
what I'm saying. Let's play devil's advocate

00:54:33.809 --> 00:54:37.510
on that. You know, that is a classic like psyop

00:54:37.510 --> 00:54:39.650
tactic, too, though. Like when people start catching

00:54:39.650 --> 00:54:42.010
on to stuff, you release all the information.

00:54:42.050 --> 00:54:44.289
So people like, well, this is so ridiculous.

00:54:44.409 --> 00:54:47.150
Like it can't be true. But I mean, there's the

00:54:47.150 --> 00:54:51.230
I mean, maybe I'm giving too much credit to the

00:54:51.230 --> 00:54:57.440
government. To everyone? Yeah. No, I mean, this

00:54:57.440 --> 00:55:01.900
is pretty awesome, but ridiculous. But also,

00:55:02.000 --> 00:55:04.519
I didn't do any research. Was there anything

00:55:04.519 --> 00:55:06.860
going on in 2005 where we needed to distract

00:55:06.860 --> 00:55:13.139
people from? Yeah. What? The Iraq and Afghan

00:55:13.139 --> 00:55:15.940
war. Yeah, but that was 2001. Wasn't that when

00:55:15.940 --> 00:55:19.519
suddenly Susan got canceled? Oh, fuck, dude.

00:55:21.059 --> 00:55:27.500
Nailed it. One of Elizabeth shoe's finest moments,

00:55:27.699 --> 00:55:30.079
but I mean like not everyone was like, but not

00:55:30.079 --> 00:55:32.940
everyone was into it. Like, like the UFO, the,

00:55:33.039 --> 00:55:35.679
the, the UFO community was split. Like no, like

00:55:35.679 --> 00:55:38.460
they were like, there was a lot of inconsistencies,

00:55:38.460 --> 00:55:41.340
like skeptics pointed out major inconsistencies

00:55:41.340 --> 00:55:43.139
and like all the data that came out, like the

00:55:43.139 --> 00:55:46.380
math wasn't checking out the. ebon calendar system

00:55:46.380 --> 00:55:49.219
was like contradictory astronomers questioned

00:55:49.219 --> 00:55:52.380
serpos orbit and radiation exposure and then

00:55:52.380 --> 00:55:54.679
a ton of like the linguistic and biological claims

00:55:54.679 --> 00:55:57.579
didn't align with any known science but i mean

00:55:57.579 --> 00:56:01.280
it's alien so i guess maybe it wouldn't a lot

00:56:01.280 --> 00:56:03.460
of critics also noted that many of the stories

00:56:03.460 --> 00:56:06.739
beats sounded eerily similar to 60s and 70s era

00:56:06.739 --> 00:56:09.360
sci -fi like the day the earth stood still stranger

00:56:09.360 --> 00:56:11.880
in a strange land and even Close Encounters,

00:56:11.880 --> 00:56:14.780
which very notably involved kind of like a similar

00:56:14.780 --> 00:56:17.079
exchange program at the end of the film. Well,

00:56:17.079 --> 00:56:19.699
those movies were obviously based on the events

00:56:19.699 --> 00:56:25.360
that happened. I mean, I did watch the movie

00:56:25.360 --> 00:56:28.079
Paul, and I did know that E .T. was found. I'm

00:56:28.079 --> 00:56:35.940
so sorry. I am genuinely sorry. But still, with

00:56:35.940 --> 00:56:38.690
all the scrutiny, like the legend. it just didn't

00:56:38.690 --> 00:56:41.550
die like forums books and documentaries continue

00:56:41.550 --> 00:56:44.329
to reference serpo the tale is now part of the

00:56:44.329 --> 00:56:46.610
modern ufo mythos right up there with roswell

00:56:46.610 --> 00:56:49.929
mj12 and area 51 so whether it was a genuine

00:56:49.929 --> 00:56:52.050
leak or a psyop or just one of the most elaborate

00:56:52.050 --> 00:56:54.769
pieces of collaborative storytelling in ufo history

00:56:54.769 --> 00:56:58.650
project serpo has endured and now i'm here telling

00:56:58.650 --> 00:57:01.090
you guys about it so there you have it that is

00:57:01.090 --> 00:57:04.070
the story of project serpo how are we feeling

00:57:04.070 --> 00:57:06.599
about it John, we'll start with you and then

00:57:06.599 --> 00:57:10.099
we'll go to Sarge. John. I love it. I mean, this

00:57:10.099 --> 00:57:12.559
is one of those. So, I mean, I have always been

00:57:12.559 --> 00:57:15.679
into I feel like all the best conspiracies fall

00:57:15.679 --> 00:57:20.099
into kind of two categories of, you know, plausible.

00:57:20.320 --> 00:57:22.960
And and there's like, wow, this makes sense on

00:57:22.960 --> 00:57:24.300
so many levels. You want to believe it. And then

00:57:24.300 --> 00:57:27.500
there's the ones I love where they're like absolutely

00:57:27.500 --> 00:57:31.739
ludicrous, but so detailed and so much going

00:57:31.739 --> 00:57:34.349
on where it's like. absolutely still fascinating

00:57:34.349 --> 00:57:36.309
and worth researching and diving into and this

00:57:36.309 --> 00:57:39.750
is one i'm 100 gonna go do a deep dive on even

00:57:39.750 --> 00:57:43.150
though you know it's fairly ludicrous but like

00:57:43.150 --> 00:57:46.510
there's so many layers to it um yeah that you

00:57:46.510 --> 00:57:49.090
gotta respect the hustle there's and there's

00:57:49.090 --> 00:57:50.849
a lot there's a lot of details that are left

00:57:50.849 --> 00:57:53.269
out like there's full -on like biographies of

00:57:53.269 --> 00:57:55.590
each person that was involved in the program

00:57:55.590 --> 00:57:58.329
their names like all that stuff like so what

00:57:58.329 --> 00:58:01.650
happened to them is there any uh they were given

00:58:01.650 --> 00:58:04.349
new identities and then they're just did they

00:58:04.349 --> 00:58:09.570
get like epstein or no no uh as far as i know

00:58:09.570 --> 00:58:14.210
i know that in 2002 i think like four of them

00:58:14.210 --> 00:58:17.170
were still alive and by the time that this dropped

00:58:17.170 --> 00:58:21.349
i think only like one was still around so 2005

00:58:21.349 --> 00:58:24.750
but i mean like that's just the dude dropping

00:58:24.750 --> 00:58:28.809
the information says so i have no idea um But

00:58:28.809 --> 00:58:30.650
yeah, there's a lot of shit to look into. Like

00:58:30.650 --> 00:58:32.949
I said, I put in all the relevant information.

00:58:33.130 --> 00:58:35.550
There's a lot of, I'm not going to say irrelevant

00:58:35.550 --> 00:58:39.670
information. A lot of gastrointestinal distress.

00:58:40.550 --> 00:58:44.590
Yeah, there was a lot of pooping, dude. So much

00:58:44.590 --> 00:58:48.590
poop. That shit must have smelled real bad. Oh,

00:58:48.590 --> 00:58:52.809
man. No, this is a great one. I love a good,

00:58:52.969 --> 00:58:57.630
like, the... like the storytelling arc on this

00:58:57.630 --> 00:59:00.369
is great because some of the great conspiracy

00:59:00.369 --> 00:59:03.170
i love are based around just like a small like

00:59:03.170 --> 00:59:06.110
tidbit that people build on but this like is

00:59:06.110 --> 00:59:09.250
presented to us already with this lore which

00:59:09.250 --> 00:59:12.050
is awesome well i mean like there's like we always

00:59:12.050 --> 00:59:14.030
say on the show like we don't believe a lot of

00:59:14.030 --> 00:59:15.949
the conspiracy theories but every good conspiracy

00:59:15.949 --> 00:59:19.630
theory has like that one kernel of truth where

00:59:19.630 --> 00:59:22.329
when you find that one kernel of truth, you're

00:59:22.329 --> 00:59:24.090
like, well, what else about this could be true?

00:59:24.289 --> 00:59:26.889
Right. I don't know what about this could be.

00:59:26.929 --> 00:59:28.829
I mean, the one kernel of truth is that there

00:59:28.829 --> 00:59:31.329
was a Roswell incident, whether it was a crash

00:59:31.329 --> 00:59:33.389
or not. And there was probably a kernel involved.

00:59:33.670 --> 00:59:36.809
Fair. At least a lieutenant colonel. Or also

00:59:36.809 --> 00:59:38.889
in all the amounts of fucking diarrhea happening,

00:59:38.949 --> 00:59:41.510
there was one kernel of something. I will say

00:59:41.510 --> 00:59:43.429
like the one other thing that stood out to me

00:59:43.429 --> 00:59:46.369
on that note about like, the kernel or like,

00:59:46.369 --> 00:59:48.969
where's cause with a story like this, you wonder

00:59:48.969 --> 00:59:51.070
if it was fabricated, like what was the ultimate

00:59:51.070 --> 00:59:54.550
purpose of it? Um, and I thought it was interesting

00:59:54.550 --> 00:59:58.130
the way that this, uh, alien society is basically

00:59:58.130 --> 01:00:01.849
portrayed like a communist socialist, uh, type

01:00:01.849 --> 01:00:04.510
society, especially back in the time we're talking

01:00:04.510 --> 01:00:09.750
about. Yeah. Cold war heavy era. Yeah. So it's

01:00:09.750 --> 01:00:12.170
almost like, was this supposed to be some sort

01:00:12.170 --> 01:00:18.420
of like, uh, warning story uh that that just

01:00:18.420 --> 01:00:21.059
somebody spun out of control and like lost the

01:00:21.059 --> 01:00:23.280
plot on or but like that part's interesting to

01:00:23.280 --> 01:00:26.019
me too but why wouldn't you release it like why

01:00:26.019 --> 01:00:28.699
wouldn't you leak quote -unquote the information

01:00:28.699 --> 01:00:31.719
during the time of the cold war like in the 80s

01:00:31.719 --> 01:00:33.940
like after it had already supposedly ended like

01:00:33.940 --> 01:00:36.619
why wait till 2005 to do it like i don't think

01:00:36.619 --> 01:00:39.900
there was a huge communist uprising at that time.

01:00:39.960 --> 01:00:41.659
Well, they didn't have email. They were waiting

01:00:41.659 --> 01:00:44.059
for email to be invented, so Anonymous could

01:00:44.059 --> 01:00:46.659
drop those emails. Well, wait, wasn't email invented

01:00:46.659 --> 01:00:49.460
by the government in the 80s? Or the internet?

01:00:51.579 --> 01:00:54.280
Right? You're talking about Al Gore, right? Yeah,

01:00:54.360 --> 01:00:59.000
a series of tubes. That's all it was. Yeah. No,

01:00:59.159 --> 01:01:06.260
it's just a series of tubes, guy. So, the thing

01:01:06.260 --> 01:01:09.480
that I find interesting about this is... in this

01:01:09.480 --> 01:01:13.219
story they've actually made this place that is

01:01:13.219 --> 01:01:17.079
essentially a hellscape yeah surprisingly progressive

01:01:17.079 --> 01:01:20.760
i feel like they weren't super negative about

01:01:20.760 --> 01:01:23.059
how progressive it was they were just like oh

01:01:23.059 --> 01:01:25.579
they lived like this but it was super hot i'm

01:01:25.579 --> 01:01:28.039
like well you know i could deal with i'm not

01:01:28.039 --> 01:01:30.780
gonna lie i feel like if i lived in a perpetual

01:01:30.780 --> 01:01:33.639
hellscape that's probably the best way to do

01:01:33.639 --> 01:01:35.420
it because i feel like if you went on your own

01:01:35.420 --> 01:01:39.559
you would die immediately exactly i would live

01:01:39.559 --> 01:01:42.440
in a in a in a overheated hellscape if there

01:01:42.440 --> 01:01:44.719
was like decentralized government and affordable

01:01:44.719 --> 01:01:46.760
health care i mean that's a fair trade -off for

01:01:46.760 --> 01:01:49.460
me i will say the one refreshing thing about

01:01:49.460 --> 01:01:52.659
this sorry is that i've done a lot of conspiracies

01:01:52.659 --> 01:01:55.519
on this show and like secret space program shit

01:01:55.519 --> 01:01:59.559
but this one turned into like a pretty wholesome

01:01:59.559 --> 01:02:03.460
like communistic maybe not communist but like

01:02:03.460 --> 01:02:06.110
a good society that everyone helps each other

01:02:06.110 --> 01:02:08.650
when i did hollow earth that turned into nazis

01:02:08.650 --> 01:02:11.949
in the third episode yeah we did a three -parter

01:02:11.949 --> 01:02:15.050
and i mean i made the mistake of writing all

01:02:15.050 --> 01:02:17.230
three parts section by section like researching

01:02:17.230 --> 01:02:20.070
one section before you didn't know where you

01:02:20.070 --> 01:02:23.150
were ending up dude oh man yeah that gets really

01:02:23.150 --> 01:02:26.699
uh dark Yeah, so Hollow Earth turns into just

01:02:26.699 --> 01:02:28.699
a bunch of Nazis. So I'm glad this didn't turn

01:02:28.699 --> 01:02:30.639
out to be that because I would have had to scrap

01:02:30.639 --> 01:02:31.940
the whole thing and that would have been bad

01:02:31.940 --> 01:02:33.880
or just played into it. Whatever. It doesn't

01:02:33.880 --> 01:02:38.340
matter. I mean, you can't get far in the conspiracy

01:02:38.340 --> 01:02:41.320
space without hitting a couple of Nazis. I know.

01:02:41.360 --> 01:02:43.679
I'm sure if I dug deeper into this, there would

01:02:43.679 --> 01:02:46.360
be some sort of like blood libel, adrenochrome,

01:02:46.360 --> 01:02:50.159
something or other. It's probably another another

01:02:50.159 --> 01:02:52.619
race that these aliens deal with that happen

01:02:52.619 --> 01:02:55.019
to have a lot of gold coins in a banking system.

01:02:55.099 --> 01:02:58.960
You know, it didn't go into banking. Thank Christ.

01:02:59.280 --> 01:03:02.559
I don't know anything about. Well, no, I said

01:03:02.559 --> 01:03:05.639
there's no money. It was all just like kind of

01:03:05.639 --> 01:03:08.179
got it. So, yeah, right. And the interspecies

01:03:08.179 --> 01:03:10.360
children that were bred on that planet went out

01:03:10.360 --> 01:03:14.099
to establish the Federal Reserve. That's what

01:03:14.099 --> 01:03:16.969
it was. That's exactly what it was. All right,

01:03:16.989 --> 01:03:18.929
guys. Uh, yeah. So that's the end of the episode.

01:03:19.250 --> 01:03:22.630
I think we nailed it. I think we killed it. Yeah.

01:03:22.829 --> 01:03:26.530
Um, so, uh, I guess with all that out of the

01:03:26.530 --> 01:03:28.550
way, uh, John, do you got anything you want to

01:03:28.550 --> 01:03:30.750
plug anything you want to? Yeah, I definitely,

01:03:30.769 --> 01:03:33.130
I just, I just say a couple of quick words. Um,

01:03:33.250 --> 01:03:36.969
obviously I'm on here as your homie and a conspiracy

01:03:36.969 --> 01:03:40.150
enthusiast, but, um, uh, for anyone else who's

01:03:40.150 --> 01:03:43.670
on the internet, I do run a meme page. It's probably,

01:03:43.949 --> 01:03:47.969
um, i've been told by people who knows it's probably

01:03:47.969 --> 01:03:51.170
the best meme page um and it's the greatest one

01:03:51.170 --> 01:03:54.469
in history yeah it's on instagram um at pipes

01:03:54.469 --> 01:03:57.869
buffet uh so check it out like follow subscribe

01:03:57.869 --> 01:04:01.929
turn your notifications on uh and uh give us

01:04:01.929 --> 01:04:04.969
that's what they do these days right the the

01:04:04.969 --> 01:04:07.599
twitchers or whatever they call them they The

01:04:07.599 --> 01:04:13.039
Twitchers. Streamies. Streamies. Logan Paulus.

01:04:13.219 --> 01:04:15.900
Yeah. I actually just shared a meme that you

01:04:15.900 --> 01:04:18.659
had on your page of Jesus reaching into water.

01:04:19.099 --> 01:04:21.260
Oh, dude. Did that fall on the toilet again?

01:04:21.280 --> 01:04:23.360
Did that fall on the toilet again? Dude, that's

01:04:23.360 --> 01:04:26.880
literally one of my favorites that I ever have

01:04:26.880 --> 01:04:32.199
made. It's so stupid. It's so stupid. Yeah, and

01:04:32.199 --> 01:04:35.260
I've been really turning up on that page. What

01:04:35.260 --> 01:04:40.829
sucks is... So I got 477 days clean today, which

01:04:40.829 --> 01:04:44.730
is awesome. And I've got a lot more. Yeah. Awesome.

01:04:44.769 --> 01:04:48.110
Honestly, like prior to this, I probably had

01:04:48.110 --> 01:04:50.550
about a week. Like this is not exaggeration.

01:04:50.550 --> 01:04:53.329
Seven to 10 days of clean time since I was 19.

01:04:54.989 --> 01:04:57.909
So it's great. Unfortunately for the meme page,

01:04:58.010 --> 01:05:01.400
though. Um, I got my stuff together and the page

01:05:01.400 --> 01:05:02.820
has been up like eight years and the algorithm

01:05:02.820 --> 01:05:05.340
hates me. So I'm like pumping out fire, but nobody

01:05:05.340 --> 01:05:07.579
sees it, but I just, I don't even care cause

01:05:07.579 --> 01:05:10.039
it's fun for me. So yeah, follow the page and

01:05:10.039 --> 01:05:14.280
then, um, shout out my kid who's, uh, I'm going

01:05:14.280 --> 01:05:16.579
to make, listen to this later. So shout at him,

01:05:16.639 --> 01:05:20.579
shout out my boo. And, um, yeah, I got, I got

01:05:20.579 --> 01:05:24.440
nothing. I got nothing to plug. Awesome, man.

01:05:24.500 --> 01:05:26.000
Yeah. Sorry. Do you got anything you want to

01:05:26.000 --> 01:05:31.570
say before we sign off? No, no. You know, the

01:05:31.570 --> 01:05:33.190
coloring book's still out there, but I mean,

01:05:33.210 --> 01:05:36.449
at this point, it's just perpetuating a miserable

01:05:36.449 --> 01:05:39.090
cycle. Might make another one about the Epstein

01:05:39.090 --> 01:05:42.929
files. There you go. We'll see. Other than that,

01:05:43.010 --> 01:05:45.949
you can find me on the interwebs. If you just

01:05:45.949 --> 01:05:47.849
Google Sarge the Destroyer, you'll find one of

01:05:47.849 --> 01:05:51.769
my social medias, because no one else is dumb

01:05:51.769 --> 01:05:53.869
enough to use Sarge the Destroyer as their fucking

01:05:53.869 --> 01:05:57.150
name on the internet. Is that it? We're good?

01:05:57.250 --> 01:06:02.679
Yeah? I love it. An embarrassing joke that became

01:06:02.679 --> 01:06:05.960
my internet personality. If you want to follow

01:06:05.960 --> 01:06:07.380
us on Instagram, you can follow us at Crypto

01:06:07.380 --> 01:06:09.280
Cocktail. Follow us on TikTok, Crypto Cocktail

01:06:09.280 --> 01:06:12.059
Party. We've got a Patreon. There's a couple

01:06:12.059 --> 01:06:17.179
tiers. You can choose to give us money. I think

01:06:17.179 --> 01:06:19.599
with that, John, normally Sarge says goodbye

01:06:19.599 --> 01:06:21.139
and I love you to the audience, but would you

01:06:21.139 --> 01:06:22.679
like to do the honors of saying goodbye and I

01:06:22.679 --> 01:06:26.119
love you to the audience? I'll say goodbye, but

01:06:26.119 --> 01:06:28.079
I don't know who the fuck I'm talking to. I'm

01:06:28.079 --> 01:06:29.780
not going to say I love you. I only say that

01:06:29.780 --> 01:06:33.440
to two people in my life. Sarge can handle that.

01:06:34.679 --> 01:06:37.460
Sarge, you want to say something? I love you,

01:06:37.460 --> 01:06:40.000
and I want to put my fingers in your mouth. God

01:06:40.000 --> 01:06:41.539
damn it. I could have said that.