1
00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:26,160
Hey everybody.

2
00:00:26,160 --> 00:00:28,240
Welcome back to another episode of cryptic cocktail party.

3
00:00:28,240 --> 00:00:31,280
We have a few drinks, share a few laughs, take a dive into the unknown.

4
00:00:31,280 --> 00:00:32,280
I'm your host Dave.

5
00:00:32,280 --> 00:00:34,840
Joined as always by my wonderful cohost Sarge.

6
00:00:34,840 --> 00:00:35,840
How you doing Sarge?

7
00:00:35,840 --> 00:00:36,840
Woo.

8
00:00:36,840 --> 00:00:38,520
The whales versus Vancouver.

9
00:00:38,520 --> 00:00:41,520
You seem distracted.

10
00:00:41,520 --> 00:00:45,200
Jeremy we told somebody that you were coming on and they immediately gave us a quote from

11
00:00:45,200 --> 00:00:47,120
the wrong person from all rats.

12
00:00:47,120 --> 00:00:48,120
That's hilarious.

13
00:00:48,120 --> 00:00:52,280
That's a, yeah, that's not, that wasn't me, but it's still a funny, funny line.

14
00:00:52,280 --> 00:00:53,640
It's still a funny line.

15
00:00:53,640 --> 00:00:54,640
It's the same movie.

16
00:00:54,640 --> 00:00:55,640
So you're in the ballpark.

17
00:00:55,640 --> 00:00:56,640
Yeah.

18
00:00:56,640 --> 00:00:58,840
And you're in the scene at least.

19
00:00:58,840 --> 00:01:00,920
Just don't call me Brendan Fraser and we're good.

20
00:01:00,920 --> 00:01:01,920
Yeah.

21
00:01:01,920 --> 00:01:05,480
And I'll make sure not to, not to use any Ben Affleck quotes.

22
00:01:05,480 --> 00:01:09,560
So the other voice you're hearing, if you don't already know is Jeremy London.

23
00:01:09,560 --> 00:01:10,560
What's going on man?

24
00:01:10,560 --> 00:01:11,560
What's up kids?

25
00:01:11,560 --> 00:01:14,560
What's up boys and girls?

26
00:01:14,560 --> 00:01:17,240
Early, early day drinkers.

27
00:01:17,240 --> 00:01:18,240
Yeah.

28
00:01:18,240 --> 00:01:20,360
Well, I mean it's Sunday.

29
00:01:20,360 --> 00:01:21,360
I won't be imbibing.

30
00:01:21,360 --> 00:01:26,160
I don't drink, but I, yeah, I, I would thoroughly enjoy watching you guys.

31
00:01:26,160 --> 00:01:28,840
Just go downhill.

32
00:01:28,840 --> 00:01:31,640
Methodically.

33
00:01:31,640 --> 00:01:33,440
It is a slow kind of curve.

34
00:01:33,440 --> 00:01:34,440
Yeah.

35
00:01:34,440 --> 00:01:37,840
Watch you just start like a little bit of a slurring.

36
00:01:37,840 --> 00:01:38,840
Yeah.

37
00:01:38,840 --> 00:01:44,840
It's not gonna start to fall asleep eventually, but yeah, I tend to do that to people anyway.

38
00:01:44,840 --> 00:01:47,240
So, oh, there you go.

39
00:01:47,240 --> 00:01:48,440
We're in a, we're in new England.

40
00:01:48,440 --> 00:01:49,440
Well, I'm in new England.

41
00:01:49,440 --> 00:01:53,760
Dave's not, Dave's in Pennsylvania, but up here we're expecting some snow.

42
00:01:53,760 --> 00:01:59,160
So the way you prepare for snow is everyone goes to Walmart and buys bread and milk for

43
00:01:59,160 --> 00:02:00,160
no reason.

44
00:02:00,160 --> 00:02:01,160
Yeah.

45
00:02:01,160 --> 00:02:05,160
Because you don't like, you buy milk even when you don't usually buy milk.

46
00:02:05,160 --> 00:02:06,160
I don't know why people do it.

47
00:02:06,160 --> 00:02:12,440
Well, it's like toilet paper for, you know, when there was a pandemic or any other kind

48
00:02:12,440 --> 00:02:16,120
of scary enough people straight go for the toilet paper.

49
00:02:16,120 --> 00:02:19,280
It's the creepiest, weirdest thing ever.

50
00:02:19,280 --> 00:02:22,000
Milk and I gotta say milk and bread makes more sense than toilet.

51
00:02:22,000 --> 00:02:23,000
Right, right.

52
00:02:23,000 --> 00:02:26,640
Because you can use, you can use bread as toilet paper if you ask.

53
00:02:26,640 --> 00:02:27,640
Yes, exactly.

54
00:02:27,640 --> 00:02:29,040
That's what I'm saying.

55
00:02:29,040 --> 00:02:31,040
You can't eat toilet paper.

56
00:02:31,040 --> 00:02:32,040
Exactly.

57
00:02:32,040 --> 00:02:33,040
You can't eat toilet paper.

58
00:02:33,040 --> 00:02:34,040
Right.

59
00:02:34,040 --> 00:02:35,040
It is not recommended.

60
00:02:35,040 --> 00:02:36,040
Right.

61
00:02:36,040 --> 00:02:37,520
It's like there's food and beer, but there's no beer and food.

62
00:02:37,520 --> 00:02:38,520
Yeah.

63
00:02:38,520 --> 00:02:39,520
Well, no.

64
00:02:39,520 --> 00:02:43,320
So after you, after you, you buy all of your supplies, you go to the Packy, which is what

65
00:02:43,320 --> 00:02:45,720
we call a liquor store.

66
00:02:45,720 --> 00:02:48,960
And then you buy as much alcohol as you can carry.

67
00:02:48,960 --> 00:02:51,760
And then you just start drinking and you stop drinking when the storm ends.

68
00:02:51,760 --> 00:02:56,080
I think that's a thoroughly irresponsible decision.

69
00:02:56,080 --> 00:03:01,080
Sensible thing, sensible thing to do if, you know, you don't, you don't, you don't want

70
00:03:01,080 --> 00:03:03,840
to be present during any of it, but you know, I get it.

71
00:03:03,840 --> 00:03:04,840
I get it.

72
00:03:04,840 --> 00:03:05,840
I get it.

73
00:03:05,840 --> 00:03:10,160
I mean, you will go outside in the middle of the night to shovel while drunk.

74
00:03:10,160 --> 00:03:13,760
Well, you know, it makes you tough.

75
00:03:13,760 --> 00:03:14,760
It makes you.

76
00:03:14,760 --> 00:03:15,760
Yeah, exactly.

77
00:03:15,760 --> 00:03:17,960
All right, gentlemen, I think I got a pretty good story for you guys today.

78
00:03:17,960 --> 00:03:21,920
Jeremy, are you are you like a cryptids aliens conspiracy kind of guy?

79
00:03:21,920 --> 00:03:23,960
Like, is that something you dive into?

80
00:03:23,960 --> 00:03:24,960
Yes.

81
00:03:24,960 --> 00:03:29,720
You know, George Yosoukalis has actually become a friend of mine.

82
00:03:29,720 --> 00:03:32,680
You know, yes and no.

83
00:03:32,680 --> 00:03:36,840
I have seen things, though, you know, I really have, man.

84
00:03:36,840 --> 00:03:44,520
I've seen ghosts and I saw what can only be described as a UFORUAP because it's nothing

85
00:03:44,520 --> 00:03:47,680
I've ever seen or could even describe.

86
00:03:47,680 --> 00:03:51,200
But I've experienced some things you and I briefly talked about that on the Citizens

87
00:03:51,200 --> 00:03:52,440
Guide episode we did.

88
00:03:52,440 --> 00:03:53,440
Yeah.

89
00:03:53,440 --> 00:03:59,120
So there's something else there, not to mention you look up in the stars and how can we possibly

90
00:03:59,120 --> 00:04:00,120
not?

91
00:04:00,120 --> 00:04:03,440
How can we possibly the only ones here now as far as cryptids on the you know, the Big

92
00:04:03,440 --> 00:04:07,920
Foot and all that stuff, I feel like we would have found that by now.

93
00:04:07,920 --> 00:04:09,800
I just feel like we would have found it.

94
00:04:09,800 --> 00:04:12,640
You know, bones or something.

95
00:04:12,640 --> 00:04:18,080
That's actually the standing position of the show is that Big Foot doesn't.

96
00:04:18,080 --> 00:04:19,080
Bigfoot's not.

97
00:04:19,080 --> 00:04:20,080
It's just not.

98
00:04:20,080 --> 00:04:27,000
We can hunt down the most like, you know, like exotic animal on this planet.

99
00:04:27,000 --> 00:04:34,680
Go to the middle of the middle of the fucking, you know, South American rainforest and find,

100
00:04:34,680 --> 00:04:40,440
you know, some little monkey that's like this big, you know, but you can't find a giant

101
00:04:40,440 --> 00:04:46,840
monkey in the United States where we don't really have monkeys that run along.

102
00:04:46,840 --> 00:04:47,840
It's aliens.

103
00:04:47,840 --> 00:04:53,240
Aliens drop them for covert missions and then they come back and pick them up.

104
00:04:53,240 --> 00:04:54,240
Obviously.

105
00:04:54,240 --> 00:04:56,240
They could they could also be interdimensional too.

106
00:04:56,240 --> 00:04:57,240
So don't forget that one.

107
00:04:57,240 --> 00:04:58,240
They're all like Chewbacca.

108
00:04:58,240 --> 00:04:59,240
They're all like Chewbacca.

109
00:04:59,240 --> 00:05:00,240
Exactly.

110
00:05:00,240 --> 00:05:02,640
They come down with a weird looking crossbow.

111
00:05:02,640 --> 00:05:07,120
I would like to think that all of the Big Feets out there, whatever you call them, all

112
00:05:07,120 --> 00:05:13,520
have spaceships and that they fly them really well and that they're actually the pilots

113
00:05:13,520 --> 00:05:14,520
of them.

114
00:05:14,520 --> 00:05:16,160
That that would be a much more entertaining story.

115
00:05:16,160 --> 00:05:17,400
And they wear cloaking devices.

116
00:05:17,400 --> 00:05:19,440
So that's why all their pictures are blurry.

117
00:05:19,440 --> 00:05:27,400
There's just as much a likelihood of this being true as there is of there actually being

118
00:05:27,400 --> 00:05:30,120
a Big Foot on this planet.

119
00:05:30,120 --> 00:05:31,600
You're 100%.

120
00:05:31,600 --> 00:05:34,800
Yeah, we would have found it.

121
00:05:34,800 --> 00:05:36,200
But we still talk about it because it's weird.

122
00:05:36,200 --> 00:05:37,200
I love it.

123
00:05:37,200 --> 00:05:38,200
These people are weird.

124
00:05:38,200 --> 00:05:40,880
Luckily today we're not we're not going to be talking about cryptids.

125
00:05:40,880 --> 00:05:44,960
I actually chose something a little bit stranger than that.

126
00:05:44,960 --> 00:05:50,960
So today we're going to be going to Hokkaido, Japan, specifically the city of Katami, which

127
00:05:50,960 --> 00:05:54,760
when translated into English means seeing abundant joy, which I really like.

128
00:05:54,760 --> 00:05:55,760
I think that's cute.

129
00:05:55,760 --> 00:05:56,760
Cute name for a town.

130
00:05:56,760 --> 00:05:57,760
I like that.

131
00:05:57,760 --> 00:05:58,760
Yeah.

132
00:05:58,760 --> 00:06:00,400
I also like that Japan has mascots for everything.

133
00:06:00,400 --> 00:06:01,400
You do.

134
00:06:01,400 --> 00:06:04,640
They don't have a mascot for this because it would be fucking nightmarish.

135
00:06:04,640 --> 00:06:11,960
But Japan has great Japan has some really good eerie like there's some crazy eerie things

136
00:06:11,960 --> 00:06:13,360
over in Japan, though.

137
00:06:13,360 --> 00:06:14,360
They really do.

138
00:06:14,360 --> 00:06:15,360
Like, yeah.

139
00:06:15,360 --> 00:06:16,360
So this is going to be good.

140
00:06:16,360 --> 00:06:18,760
I'm looking forward to this.

141
00:06:18,760 --> 00:06:20,480
It better be good.

142
00:06:20,480 --> 00:06:22,200
I promise it will be.

143
00:06:22,200 --> 00:06:23,200
No pressure.

144
00:06:23,200 --> 00:06:24,200
No pressure.

145
00:06:24,200 --> 00:06:27,560
Katami is also known for its yearly ice flows.

146
00:06:27,560 --> 00:06:31,120
It produces an abundance of peppermint candies that it's well known for.

147
00:06:31,120 --> 00:06:35,200
It's also well known for the sport of curling, which I fucking love.

148
00:06:35,200 --> 00:06:37,200
Like that sport is top notch.

149
00:06:37,200 --> 00:06:38,920
I love curling.

150
00:06:38,920 --> 00:06:42,960
I don't fully understand it, but for some reason, it's like super hypnotic to watch.

151
00:06:42,960 --> 00:06:43,960
Like just that the fucking.

152
00:06:43,960 --> 00:06:44,960
Oh, yeah.

153
00:06:44,960 --> 00:06:45,960
The brush.

154
00:06:45,960 --> 00:06:51,400
I don't know either, but it makes me so happy to watch him do it because to me, there's

155
00:06:51,400 --> 00:06:55,120
nothing more Canadian than vigorously cleaning ice.

156
00:06:55,120 --> 00:06:59,720
You're not wrong.

157
00:06:59,720 --> 00:07:02,240
It's definitely a pastime.

158
00:07:02,240 --> 00:07:06,320
Well, if you go like, you know, now like that equipment they use actually kind of makes

159
00:07:06,320 --> 00:07:07,480
sense when you see it.

160
00:07:07,480 --> 00:07:11,440
But like if you go back like 20 years and see what they were using, they were like literally

161
00:07:11,440 --> 00:07:13,000
using like straw brooms.

162
00:07:13,000 --> 00:07:17,560
They're like, yeah, I'm like, how is that actually doing anything?

163
00:07:17,560 --> 00:07:20,160
They just had a Wolverine tied to a stick.

164
00:07:20,160 --> 00:07:21,160
Pretty much.

165
00:07:21,160 --> 00:07:22,160
All right, Japan.

166
00:07:22,160 --> 00:07:25,680
So where are we again in Japan?

167
00:07:25,680 --> 00:07:28,880
We're in Katami, the city of Katami.

168
00:07:28,880 --> 00:07:32,960
Now, well, all these seem like super awesome things to be known for.

169
00:07:32,960 --> 00:07:37,400
There's something else that Katami can call its own, and that is that it is home to and

170
00:07:37,400 --> 00:07:40,140
I have said this several times on the show, but this time I really mean it.

171
00:07:40,140 --> 00:07:44,520
One of the wildest alien abduction stories that we have ever covered.

172
00:07:44,520 --> 00:07:45,580
Like it's kind of gross.

173
00:07:45,580 --> 00:07:46,580
It's weird.

174
00:07:46,580 --> 00:07:48,160
Has some crazy twists and turns.

175
00:07:48,160 --> 00:07:50,300
So are you guys ready to dive into it?

176
00:07:50,300 --> 00:07:54,720
I would expect nothing less from a country that has vending machines full of used women's

177
00:07:54,720 --> 00:07:55,720
underwear.

178
00:07:55,720 --> 00:07:56,720
Yeah.

179
00:07:56,720 --> 00:07:57,720
Sorry.

180
00:07:57,720 --> 00:07:58,720
Yeah, no, it's gotta be twisted.

181
00:07:58,720 --> 00:08:05,520
I mean, my brother went to Japan and he said that like on every subway, all of the older

182
00:08:05,520 --> 00:08:11,840
men are just sitting there on their phones watching porn in public on the subway.

183
00:08:11,840 --> 00:08:18,680
Like that's just, they're very dressed, nice, very polite, very, but they're all watching

184
00:08:18,680 --> 00:08:19,680
porn anyway.

185
00:08:19,680 --> 00:08:25,040
See, that's the same thing that you would find anywhere on the MBTA, but except for

186
00:08:25,040 --> 00:08:26,040
the dress nice part.

187
00:08:26,040 --> 00:08:27,040
Yeah.

188
00:08:27,040 --> 00:08:31,320
It's a guy wearing basketball shorts and like a Adidas track jacket.

189
00:08:31,320 --> 00:08:32,320
Yeah.

190
00:08:32,320 --> 00:08:35,920
These guys got the, they look like businessmen, you know, and they are probably, they're just,

191
00:08:35,920 --> 00:08:37,880
that's, I guess it's just weird.

192
00:08:37,880 --> 00:08:39,920
Anyway, so I digress again.

193
00:08:39,920 --> 00:08:40,920
Sorry.

194
00:08:40,920 --> 00:08:41,920
All right.

195
00:08:41,920 --> 00:08:48,080
So in the year of our Lord, 1974, a 28 year old vegetable farmer, Yoshiro Fujiwara, which

196
00:08:48,080 --> 00:08:51,780
I'm just going to call Yoshi from now on, cause that is an aggressive babe to try and

197
00:08:51,780 --> 00:08:53,440
say over and over again.

198
00:08:53,440 --> 00:08:54,680
He was just living his life.

199
00:08:54,680 --> 00:08:59,400
He spent his days tending his crops and his nights resting up to spend another day tending

200
00:08:59,400 --> 00:09:00,400
to his crops.

201
00:09:00,400 --> 00:09:03,200
He's like a real blue collar kind of guy.

202
00:09:03,200 --> 00:09:05,320
And like, he didn't give into like flights of fancy.

203
00:09:05,320 --> 00:09:09,440
He doesn't really believe in ghosts or aliens or you know, monsters, anything like that,

204
00:09:09,440 --> 00:09:11,600
just real salt of the earth kind of guy.

205
00:09:11,600 --> 00:09:16,120
But on April 6th of that year in the early hours of the morning, that all changed.

206
00:09:16,120 --> 00:09:20,760
So at around 3 a.m. Yoshi's dog started barking uncontrollably.

207
00:09:20,760 --> 00:09:25,880
So before Yoshi even had a chance to try and like calm his dog down, there was a loud pounding

208
00:09:25,880 --> 00:09:30,320
on his front door, exhausted and probably super pissed.

209
00:09:30,320 --> 00:09:34,080
Like now that he has to get up, he goes and opens the door to see what's causing all the

210
00:09:34,080 --> 00:09:35,080
ruckus.

211
00:09:35,080 --> 00:09:38,840
And when he opens the door, he's ready, pretty much ready to give whoever was out there just

212
00:09:38,840 --> 00:09:40,400
a piece of his mind, like, fuck you.

213
00:09:40,400 --> 00:09:42,520
Why you at my house?

214
00:09:42,520 --> 00:09:48,880
But what greeted him wasn't a neighbor or the cops or even a human standing on his doorstep

215
00:09:48,880 --> 00:09:53,800
was a creature whose appearance could only be described as, quote unquote, defying logic.

216
00:09:53,800 --> 00:09:59,240
It was it was roughly they were polite and they rung the bell.

217
00:09:59,240 --> 00:10:03,160
And so they get some credit right off the top.

218
00:10:03,160 --> 00:10:04,160
Are they not?

219
00:10:04,160 --> 00:10:05,160
Are they not?

220
00:10:05,160 --> 00:10:06,160
They not.

221
00:10:06,160 --> 00:10:07,160
They knocked.

222
00:10:07,160 --> 00:10:08,160
But what happens next?

223
00:10:08,160 --> 00:10:11,240
They don't deserve anything.

224
00:10:11,240 --> 00:10:15,200
So it was it was roughly three feet tall and is wearing what seemed to be like a clear

225
00:10:15,200 --> 00:10:16,200
vinyl suit.

226
00:10:16,200 --> 00:10:20,240
You know, those clear raincoats that you could see through kind of wearing something like

227
00:10:20,240 --> 00:10:21,240
that.

228
00:10:21,240 --> 00:10:26,520
His head was bulbous and octopus like with downward slanting eyes, a wide grinning mouth

229
00:10:26,520 --> 00:10:30,640
and a single V shaped slit where its nostrils should be.

230
00:10:30,640 --> 00:10:31,640
I hate all of us.

231
00:10:31,640 --> 00:10:33,920
Yeah, it's one of the grays.

232
00:10:33,920 --> 00:10:35,920
No, it's worse.

233
00:10:35,920 --> 00:10:39,200
It stood on what I guess two legs.

234
00:10:39,200 --> 00:10:42,120
I get pretty much what it is is its torso.

235
00:10:42,120 --> 00:10:44,760
If you can call it that, it's just like a fleshy lump.

236
00:10:44,760 --> 00:10:49,760
And then coming off of it were four starfish like limbs that ended in a rounded nub.

237
00:10:49,760 --> 00:10:52,840
So like two legs and two arms, I guess.

238
00:10:52,840 --> 00:10:59,680
Now the skin beneath the clear suit was brown, bumpy and coated in some sort of slime.

239
00:10:59,680 --> 00:11:05,200
And it was also dotted with blue and yellow scab like spots like they weren't on the skin.

240
00:11:05,200 --> 00:11:09,360
Like it was like a color is like these are like lesions on its skin.

241
00:11:09,360 --> 00:11:15,200
Now on its head, it wore like a blue cone like helmet thing with like a little antenna

242
00:11:15,200 --> 00:11:19,760
on top that emitted bursts of visible electricity that like rippled across this body.

243
00:11:19,760 --> 00:11:22,240
So it's like an electrified.

244
00:11:22,240 --> 00:11:29,840
This is like Marvin the Martian just showed up with like a leprosy.

245
00:11:29,840 --> 00:11:33,200
It's not ideal.

246
00:11:33,200 --> 00:11:35,080
Marvin the Martian with radiation poisoning.

247
00:11:35,080 --> 00:11:38,520
Yeah, Marvin got too close to the radio.

248
00:11:38,520 --> 00:11:42,520
Just imagine like being awoken at 3 a.m. and opening your front door like you're still

249
00:11:42,520 --> 00:11:44,560
sleepy and that's the first thing you see.

250
00:11:44,560 --> 00:11:48,240
Like that would ruin anyone's day almost immediately.

251
00:11:48,240 --> 00:11:52,400
I think it was just it would change everything, wouldn't it?

252
00:11:52,400 --> 00:11:53,400
Oh fair.

253
00:11:53,400 --> 00:11:58,160
Like you answer the door and there's a fucking anime villain waiting for you.

254
00:11:58,160 --> 00:12:04,080
You're like looking around for Bugs Bunny and like Yosei Nishimura.

255
00:12:04,080 --> 00:12:05,080
What am I?

256
00:12:05,080 --> 00:12:06,080
Please help me.

257
00:12:06,080 --> 00:12:11,160
Why are you wet?

258
00:12:11,160 --> 00:12:15,600
Before Yoshi could fully process what he was saying, because I mean, that's a lot to take

259
00:12:15,600 --> 00:12:18,880
in when you're abruptly woken up at 3 a.m.

260
00:12:18,880 --> 00:12:24,880
The entity raised one of its starfish arms and an intense and unbearably hot orange beam

261
00:12:24,880 --> 00:12:27,760
of light filled Yoshi's house.

262
00:12:27,760 --> 00:12:29,480
Now Yoshi's terrified at this point.

263
00:12:29,480 --> 00:12:30,480
He's shitting bricks.

264
00:12:30,480 --> 00:12:33,720
So he ran back to his bedroom and I assume hid under the covers.

265
00:12:33,720 --> 00:12:35,360
I don't know, but that's what I would have done.

266
00:12:35,360 --> 00:12:39,360
I guess like one of those like if they can't see me, I can't see them.

267
00:12:39,360 --> 00:12:41,560
We're good.

268
00:12:41,560 --> 00:12:46,040
Unfortunately that didn't work for all Yoshi because through his window he could see a

269
00:12:46,040 --> 00:12:50,480
craft hovering about 70 feet above the ground in a nearby field.

270
00:12:50,480 --> 00:12:55,480
The craft was small, about five feet high and 26 feet in diameter and was emitting orange

271
00:12:55,480 --> 00:12:56,740
rays of light.

272
00:12:56,740 --> 00:13:02,280
Then suddenly Yoshi felt a warm gust of air at his feet and then some invisible force

273
00:13:02,280 --> 00:13:06,440
started pulling him towards the window out of his house and into the craft.

274
00:13:06,440 --> 00:13:12,400
Now to make it just a little weirder, he wasn't being pulled into like a hatch or a door on

275
00:13:12,400 --> 00:13:13,400
the craft.

276
00:13:13,400 --> 00:13:16,000
He's being like absorbed through the hall.

277
00:13:16,000 --> 00:13:22,560
Like you know, like when the flash can like he can like vibrate so fast that he can go

278
00:13:22,560 --> 00:13:23,720
through things.

279
00:13:23,720 --> 00:13:24,720
It's kind of like that.

280
00:13:24,720 --> 00:13:28,360
It feels like an episode of an anime show or something.

281
00:13:28,360 --> 00:13:33,800
I'm waiting for five smaller crafts to come together to form one large robot.

282
00:13:33,800 --> 00:13:39,840
What was that thing from Power Rangers where they all melded together to make the one big

283
00:13:39,840 --> 00:13:40,840
robot?

284
00:13:40,840 --> 00:13:41,840
That's it.

285
00:13:41,840 --> 00:13:42,840
Transform.

286
00:13:42,840 --> 00:13:44,840
I'm old so I'm thinking of Voltron.

287
00:13:44,840 --> 00:13:48,320
Yeah Voltron and the Gobots, all those guys.

288
00:13:48,320 --> 00:13:49,320
That's funny.

289
00:13:49,320 --> 00:13:54,360
So he's getting sucked into the hall like absorbed into the skin of the craft.

290
00:13:54,360 --> 00:13:56,640
Yeah like he just he just went through it.

291
00:13:56,640 --> 00:14:00,920
Like he didn't go through a door or hatch just just like right through.

292
00:14:00,920 --> 00:14:06,640
Now once inside, Yoshi found himself in a blue parallelepiped shaped room, which I found

293
00:14:06,640 --> 00:14:09,240
out is a room where all the walls are parallelograms.

294
00:14:09,240 --> 00:14:11,320
I had to look it up because I didn't know what that meant.

295
00:14:11,320 --> 00:14:13,560
What the actual fuck?

296
00:14:13,560 --> 00:14:14,560
Yeah I don't know.

297
00:14:14,560 --> 00:14:19,920
Now the walls were covered in lamp like structures, air vents and what appeared to be a sign with

298
00:14:19,920 --> 00:14:24,320
writing that looked vaguely Japanese, but was pretty much unreadable.

299
00:14:24,320 --> 00:14:28,120
The air was very thick with like a nauseating scent, but before he even had a chance to

300
00:14:28,120 --> 00:14:33,520
really get his bearings, he was once again face to face with not one but two of those

301
00:14:33,520 --> 00:14:35,800
little octopus fellas.

302
00:14:35,800 --> 00:14:40,480
Now Yoshi panicked and tried to stand up, but despite despite them being, you know,

303
00:14:40,480 --> 00:14:43,680
just small little guys, they had surprising strength.

304
00:14:43,680 --> 00:14:46,200
They were holding Yoshi down as he tried to get away.

305
00:14:46,200 --> 00:14:50,640
Well, you know, them being the nice people, they did reassure him telepathically that

306
00:14:50,640 --> 00:14:55,040
quote no danger, we promise to release you close to your home end quote.

307
00:14:55,040 --> 00:14:59,800
So that's, you know, this has the makings of a really kinky tentacle point.

308
00:14:59,800 --> 00:15:03,000
It all just ties back to anime.

309
00:15:03,000 --> 00:15:05,120
That's really all it does.

310
00:15:05,120 --> 00:15:06,120
Extremely strong.

311
00:15:06,120 --> 00:15:08,760
Like this is a hentai for sure.

312
00:15:08,760 --> 00:15:12,560
Extremely strong tentacle bearing creatures holding you down on a table.

313
00:15:12,560 --> 00:15:15,840
I mean, it seems like he was just incredibly aware the whole time.

314
00:15:15,840 --> 00:15:20,000
There's a lot of, yeah, that's a lot of details to remember for these.

315
00:15:20,000 --> 00:15:25,720
Situations are usually far more, you know, sort of revealed through hypnosis later trauma.

316
00:15:25,720 --> 00:15:31,360
You had to lock it away.

317
00:15:31,360 --> 00:15:32,360
Yeah.

318
00:15:32,360 --> 00:15:34,360
Oh, definitely repress the hell out of this.

319
00:15:34,360 --> 00:15:36,960
Genuinely locked away for a bit.

320
00:15:36,960 --> 00:15:37,960
Yeah.

321
00:15:37,960 --> 00:15:38,960
Wow.

322
00:15:38,960 --> 00:15:39,960
Holy cow.

323
00:15:39,960 --> 00:15:42,960
It's inside me.

324
00:15:42,960 --> 00:15:46,360
So are they, did the probes come out?

325
00:15:46,360 --> 00:15:49,080
This guy, they're telling him he's okay, but then what'd they do?

326
00:15:49,080 --> 00:15:50,080
No.

327
00:15:50,080 --> 00:15:54,280
So what happened next is that they tried to reassure him, but he wasn't hearing any of

328
00:15:54,280 --> 00:15:55,280
that.

329
00:15:55,280 --> 00:15:56,280
Like he didn't want to know what was going to come next.

330
00:15:56,280 --> 00:16:01,280
So he mustered all of his strength and he broke free from these little jelly fucks.

331
00:16:01,280 --> 00:16:05,320
And then he stumbled his way through a partially open hatch.

332
00:16:05,320 --> 00:16:10,360
Fortunately for him, or just by the grace of God something, when he jumped out of the

333
00:16:10,360 --> 00:16:12,440
hatch, he only fell like 10 feet off the ground.

334
00:16:12,440 --> 00:16:15,800
Like they didn't really go anywhere.

335
00:16:15,800 --> 00:16:18,440
I would like to think also that he used karate on them.

336
00:16:18,440 --> 00:16:23,160
Can we at least say he used karate on them?

337
00:16:23,160 --> 00:16:27,760
So I'm thinking of like the opening to the Mr. Bean TV show where he just slaps onto

338
00:16:27,760 --> 00:16:29,800
the ground in a beam of light.

339
00:16:29,800 --> 00:16:30,800
Pretty much.

340
00:16:30,800 --> 00:16:33,880
I mean, like even though it's 10 feet, like that still sucks.

341
00:16:33,880 --> 00:16:34,880
Like falling 10 feet.

342
00:16:34,880 --> 00:16:35,880
That would hurt.

343
00:16:35,880 --> 00:16:36,880
That would hurt really, really bad.

344
00:16:36,880 --> 00:16:37,880
Like you don't break anything.

345
00:16:37,880 --> 00:16:38,880
Yeah.

346
00:16:38,880 --> 00:16:43,880
I just feel bad for the guy.

347
00:16:43,880 --> 00:16:44,880
The fall wouldn't be the problem.

348
00:16:44,880 --> 00:16:45,880
It would be the stop.

349
00:16:45,880 --> 00:16:46,880
Yeah, exactly.

350
00:16:46,880 --> 00:16:49,800
The end of the fall would be the problem.

351
00:16:49,800 --> 00:16:52,720
And then imagine like he's in his pajamas, you know, he's in his underwear, whatever

352
00:16:52,720 --> 00:16:55,240
he gets up and he's like, Oh God.

353
00:16:55,240 --> 00:16:58,320
And then he starts like hobbling back to his little house.

354
00:16:58,320 --> 00:17:01,920
So, so, so I need to hear the rest of this.

355
00:17:01,920 --> 00:17:03,320
This is crazy.

356
00:17:03,320 --> 00:17:07,200
So as soon as he hit the ground, he's I'm sure just full of adrenaline.

357
00:17:07,200 --> 00:17:10,520
So he scrambled to his feet and he ran to a nearby house.

358
00:17:10,520 --> 00:17:14,160
When the homeowners finally opened their doors, they found Yoshi standing there pale, wide

359
00:17:14,160 --> 00:17:17,680
eyed and visibly shaken.

360
00:17:17,680 --> 00:17:21,880
The neighbors took him in and once inside, I assume he like looked at a clock or something.

361
00:17:21,880 --> 00:17:25,980
He realized that his experience had lasted about an hour and a half, but for him it only

362
00:17:25,980 --> 00:17:28,280
felt like a matter of minutes.

363
00:17:28,280 --> 00:17:34,280
Now after Yoshi regained some sense of calm, which I mean, I don't know how, I'd be done

364
00:17:34,280 --> 00:17:38,160
how much he would calm down after that, but he must've like somehow just like mellowed

365
00:17:38,160 --> 00:17:40,000
out for just a minute.

366
00:17:40,000 --> 00:17:43,720
He made the two mile trek back to his house.

367
00:17:43,720 --> 00:17:45,360
Apparently they'd gone over two miles.

368
00:17:45,360 --> 00:17:47,320
So that's crazy.

369
00:17:47,320 --> 00:17:48,320
I don't know.

370
00:17:48,320 --> 00:17:49,320
That's an important detail.

371
00:17:49,320 --> 00:17:50,320
That's a long walk.

372
00:17:50,320 --> 00:17:51,320
Yeah.

373
00:17:51,320 --> 00:17:52,320
Eh, not really.

374
00:17:52,320 --> 00:17:57,720
I think I would need, I would need to walk that much at least after something like that

375
00:17:57,720 --> 00:17:58,720
happened.

376
00:17:58,720 --> 00:18:03,520
I would need to take a good long sobering walk.

377
00:18:03,520 --> 00:18:04,520
Yeah.

378
00:18:04,520 --> 00:18:07,200
I might take up cigarettes again just to get the side of my system.

379
00:18:07,200 --> 00:18:09,200
I would be making some stops along the way.

380
00:18:09,200 --> 00:18:10,200
Pardon me.

381
00:18:10,200 --> 00:18:11,200
Do you have any heroin?

382
00:18:11,200 --> 00:18:17,240
I could probably get some eyeballs because I need to do a lot of forgetting.

383
00:18:17,240 --> 00:18:20,520
I need to be doing a lot of forgetting.

384
00:18:20,520 --> 00:18:21,520
Pardon me.

385
00:18:21,520 --> 00:18:22,520
Good sir.

386
00:18:22,520 --> 00:18:23,520
Do you have any meth?

387
00:18:23,520 --> 00:18:24,520
I just had an experience.

388
00:18:24,520 --> 00:18:25,520
What, me?

389
00:18:25,520 --> 00:18:28,160
I feel like that would make, I feel like meth would make an alien abduction way worse.

390
00:18:28,160 --> 00:18:30,560
You would remember way more than you want to, I bet.

391
00:18:30,560 --> 00:18:31,560
That's a good point.

392
00:18:31,560 --> 00:18:32,560
That's a good point.

393
00:18:32,560 --> 00:18:33,560
You're right.

394
00:18:33,560 --> 00:18:34,560
You would definitely use karate.

395
00:18:34,560 --> 00:18:35,560
Yeah.

396
00:18:35,560 --> 00:18:36,680
We'll definitely say he used karate.

397
00:18:36,680 --> 00:18:41,280
Now no one else in the area had reported seeing anything unusual that night, but according

398
00:18:41,280 --> 00:18:45,960
to one UFO investigator who looked into the case, a middle schooler who lived near Yoshi

399
00:18:45,960 --> 00:18:52,500
named Ryuki Fujita claims she had seen a bright light outside of her window around the time

400
00:18:52,500 --> 00:18:55,780
of his abduction, but no, she didn't like go up to see what it was.

401
00:18:55,780 --> 00:18:57,280
So who knows?

402
00:18:57,280 --> 00:19:02,120
Now this alone is a pretty cool story if it ended here, but I'm not in the business of

403
00:19:02,120 --> 00:19:03,120
wasting your time.

404
00:19:03,120 --> 00:19:04,120
You know, more.

405
00:19:04,120 --> 00:19:06,120
This shit gets fucking, this shit gets wild.

406
00:19:06,120 --> 00:19:07,120
Oh God.

407
00:19:07,120 --> 00:19:08,120
Oh, this is so meaningful.

408
00:19:08,120 --> 00:19:13,920
You tell me it shows up in a baseball game and it turns out for like the Yokohama giants

409
00:19:13,920 --> 00:19:14,920
or something.

410
00:19:14,920 --> 00:19:21,560
Dude, three of them stack, three of them get into like a trench coat and they show up.

411
00:19:21,560 --> 00:19:24,960
Sir, your stab is on the counter.

412
00:19:24,960 --> 00:19:28,840
This knock sounded higher on the door than the last knock.

413
00:19:28,840 --> 00:19:31,960
That can't be the aliens.

414
00:19:31,960 --> 00:19:35,840
So Jeremy's not far off in a sense.

415
00:19:35,840 --> 00:19:43,200
So please don't mention Joe Mark's glasses with the mustache.

416
00:19:43,200 --> 00:19:47,820
So the next day, less than 24 hours after his abduction, Yoshi began experience severe

417
00:19:47,820 --> 00:19:51,700
pain in his ears and a burning sensation in his fingertips.

418
00:19:51,700 --> 00:19:56,720
He soon fell into a trance like state and started drawing strange hieroglyphs that neither

419
00:19:56,720 --> 00:20:02,200
he nor anyone else could decipher, claiming that he was compelled to do so by some unseen

420
00:20:02,200 --> 00:20:03,600
force.

421
00:20:03,600 --> 00:20:06,960
Then a booming voice in his head issued a command.

422
00:20:06,960 --> 00:20:12,920
It said quote, when the disc lands on the mountain, you will come and board by yourself.

423
00:20:12,920 --> 00:20:15,640
And on April 8th, he did just that.

424
00:20:15,640 --> 00:20:19,880
Yoshi and two of his buddies, names unknown, climbed up Nikoro mountain.

425
00:20:19,880 --> 00:20:24,000
And before reaching the summit, Yoshi told his friends like, you just hang back for a

426
00:20:24,000 --> 00:20:27,880
bit and he hiked the rest of the way to the top by himself.

427
00:20:27,880 --> 00:20:30,520
There the craft awaited him and he board willingly.

428
00:20:30,520 --> 00:20:35,840
Now whether it was actually willingly or if he was compelled to do so by them somehow,

429
00:20:35,840 --> 00:20:38,120
I don't really know.

430
00:20:38,120 --> 00:20:42,800
But what happens next is probably like, it's probably the opposite of what you think is

431
00:20:42,800 --> 00:20:44,840
going to happen.

432
00:20:44,840 --> 00:20:46,700
They just wanted a buddy to joyride with.

433
00:20:46,700 --> 00:20:50,240
They just wanted to fucking cruise the solar system and just vibe with this dude.

434
00:20:50,240 --> 00:20:55,520
So the beings flume around the moon, then twice around the earth.

435
00:20:55,520 --> 00:21:00,840
And then just an hour and a half later, just drop them back off on the top of the mountain.

436
00:21:00,840 --> 00:21:02,920
I mean, he did immediately collapse afterwards.

437
00:21:02,920 --> 00:21:06,760
I've smoked that strain of weed before too, Yoshi.

438
00:21:06,760 --> 00:21:10,120
Sure you did, Yoshi.

439
00:21:10,120 --> 00:21:11,600
Sure, Yoshi.

440
00:21:11,600 --> 00:21:12,600
Sure, bud.

441
00:21:12,600 --> 00:21:15,160
You sure you're a vegetable farmer, pal?

442
00:21:15,160 --> 00:21:16,160
Yeah, sure, Yoshi.

443
00:21:16,160 --> 00:21:17,160
No, sure, buddy.

444
00:21:17,160 --> 00:21:19,360
Fucking took him for a ride.

445
00:21:19,360 --> 00:21:20,360
Yeah.

446
00:21:20,360 --> 00:21:22,400
So they dropped them back off on the mountain afterwards.

447
00:21:22,400 --> 00:21:23,680
He immediately collapses.

448
00:21:23,680 --> 00:21:27,440
I'm going to guess it was probably due to exhaustion rather than something nefarious.

449
00:21:27,440 --> 00:21:29,400
Dudes had a busy 24 hours.

450
00:21:29,400 --> 00:21:30,400
Yeah, for sure.

451
00:21:30,400 --> 00:21:31,400
This would do that to you.

452
00:21:31,400 --> 00:21:34,400
This would do that to you.

453
00:21:34,400 --> 00:21:35,400
Yeah.

454
00:21:35,400 --> 00:21:37,480
I'm sure once the adrenaline wore off, he was just done.

455
00:21:37,480 --> 00:21:38,480
He was cooked.

456
00:21:38,480 --> 00:21:39,480
He's like, I'm just done.

457
00:21:39,480 --> 00:21:44,760
Now, luckily for Yoshi though, his two friends, they hadn't immediately fucked off and they

458
00:21:44,760 --> 00:21:49,120
were able to come back and get him and bring him back home.

459
00:21:49,120 --> 00:21:53,720
Now according to Yoshi, it took several days for him to recover after his second trip with

460
00:21:53,720 --> 00:21:56,240
his new starfish friends.

461
00:21:56,240 --> 00:21:59,760
But during his recovery, he discovered that he had developed psychic abilities.

462
00:21:59,760 --> 00:22:04,760
He wasn't only able to communicate with the little jelly dudes, but also had telekinetic

463
00:22:04,760 --> 00:22:09,040
abilities as well and could bend like small pieces of metal like spoons and shit with

464
00:22:09,040 --> 00:22:10,880
his mind.

465
00:22:10,880 --> 00:22:16,760
Now once Yoshi had fully recovered from his intergalactic burn run, the entities returned

466
00:22:16,760 --> 00:22:22,680
on April 13th, 1974 and invited him to go on one final trip.

467
00:22:22,680 --> 00:22:27,200
Now this time they flew past Mars, checked out that big ass storm that's going on on

468
00:22:27,200 --> 00:22:29,900
Jupiter like the eye of Jupiter.

469
00:22:29,900 --> 00:22:34,400
And then for their final stop, they took the craft down onto Saturn's moon Titan.

470
00:22:34,400 --> 00:22:38,680
There one of the little beings got off the ship, picked up a rock and gave it to Yoshi

471
00:22:38,680 --> 00:22:42,000
as like a little souvenir, like something to remember them by.

472
00:22:42,000 --> 00:22:43,480
That was super sweet.

473
00:22:43,480 --> 00:22:44,480
Yeah.

474
00:22:44,480 --> 00:22:46,360
They just literally just wanted to hang out with someone.

475
00:22:46,360 --> 00:22:47,360
You guys sound like bros.

476
00:22:47,360 --> 00:22:48,360
Yeah.

477
00:22:48,360 --> 00:22:49,360
Get in Yoshi.

478
00:22:49,360 --> 00:22:50,360
We're doing butt stuff.

479
00:22:50,360 --> 00:22:51,360
No, we're not doing that.

480
00:22:51,360 --> 00:22:52,360
Sorry, Char.

481
00:22:52,360 --> 00:22:53,360
You got to hang out.

482
00:22:53,360 --> 00:22:54,360
You won't remember all of this.

483
00:22:54,360 --> 00:22:55,360
You're going to remember every inch.

484
00:22:55,360 --> 00:22:56,360
Oh God.

485
00:22:56,360 --> 00:22:57,360
That's bummed me out.

486
00:22:57,360 --> 00:23:02,360
No, I think this is probably the sweetest alien abduction story I've ever heard in my

487
00:23:02,360 --> 00:23:03,360
life.

488
00:23:03,360 --> 00:23:04,360
Yeah.

489
00:23:04,360 --> 00:23:05,360
Because he's gross, disgusting aliens.

490
00:23:05,360 --> 00:23:06,360
I want this to be so true.

491
00:23:06,360 --> 00:23:07,360
I want this to be true.

492
00:23:07,360 --> 00:23:08,360
Yeah.

493
00:23:08,360 --> 00:23:09,360
I want this to be true.

494
00:23:09,360 --> 00:23:10,360
I want this to be true.

495
00:23:10,360 --> 00:23:11,360
I want this to be true.

496
00:23:11,360 --> 00:23:12,360
I want this to be true.

497
00:23:12,360 --> 00:23:13,360
I want this to be true.

498
00:23:13,360 --> 00:23:14,360
I want this to be true.

499
00:23:14,360 --> 00:23:15,360
I want this to be true.

500
00:23:15,360 --> 00:23:16,360
I want this to be true.

501
00:23:16,360 --> 00:23:17,360
Yeah.

502
00:23:17,360 --> 00:23:20,360
These disgusting aliens just wanted a companion.

503
00:23:20,360 --> 00:23:21,360
Yeah.

504
00:23:21,360 --> 00:23:23,840
So I guess this is a good, this is before we continue, I guess this is a good point.

505
00:23:23,840 --> 00:23:25,360
I'd like to ask this.

506
00:23:25,360 --> 00:23:27,640
Jeremy, how are we feeling so far about this story?

507
00:23:27,640 --> 00:23:29,720
Like where are you at with what's going on?

508
00:23:29,720 --> 00:23:35,520
Oh, there's absolutely no way any of this happened, but I love that somebody, somebody

509
00:23:35,520 --> 00:23:45,280
had such a wonderful moment of whatever the hell, you know, apparently, what is it?

510
00:23:45,280 --> 00:23:47,040
When you're, when you're sleep, what is it?

511
00:23:47,040 --> 00:23:48,040
Sleep paralysis.

512
00:23:48,040 --> 00:23:49,040
Sleep paralysis.

513
00:23:49,040 --> 00:23:52,880
It's the best case of sleep paralysis I've ever heard.

514
00:23:52,880 --> 00:23:54,880
It could be way worse.

515
00:23:54,880 --> 00:23:55,880
Yeah.

516
00:23:55,880 --> 00:23:56,880
It could be way worse.

517
00:23:56,880 --> 00:24:01,680
I mean, it sounds like an episode of like the Simpsons or something.

518
00:24:01,680 --> 00:24:02,680
You know what I mean?

519
00:24:02,680 --> 00:24:06,000
Like this doesn't sound, like this sounds too fun to be true.

520
00:24:06,000 --> 00:24:07,400
Like, you know what I mean?

521
00:24:07,400 --> 00:24:09,920
Like, I just want it to be true.

522
00:24:09,920 --> 00:24:10,920
You know?

523
00:24:10,920 --> 00:24:11,920
Oh yeah.

524
00:24:11,920 --> 00:24:16,480
It needs to be true because it makes me so happy that I don't care if it's a lie.

525
00:24:16,480 --> 00:24:17,480
Yeah.

526
00:24:17,480 --> 00:24:19,480
He apologizes for using karate on them.

527
00:24:19,480 --> 00:24:25,400
Like that's like, that's like one of the scenes they're like, oh, and he's like, oh, and

528
00:24:25,400 --> 00:24:29,280
by the way, like when you guys showed up, like I didn't mean to fuck you guys up.

529
00:24:29,280 --> 00:24:32,320
The aliens like, you punched me right in the scabs.

530
00:24:32,320 --> 00:24:35,360
Listen, man, I'm not used to you going, oh, the scabs.

531
00:24:35,360 --> 00:24:37,320
My lesions burst open.

532
00:24:37,320 --> 00:24:39,360
Oh, good lord, yeah.

533
00:24:39,360 --> 00:24:41,760
Now you're getting into real anime.

534
00:24:41,760 --> 00:24:42,760
That's real anime.

535
00:24:42,760 --> 00:24:44,960
Like that's actual anime.

536
00:24:44,960 --> 00:24:50,660
I feel like we do a lot of these episodes where we know that it's probably not true,

537
00:24:50,660 --> 00:24:53,920
but me and Sarge always decide that it is true just because it's such a good-

538
00:24:53,920 --> 00:24:54,920
I want it to be true.

539
00:24:54,920 --> 00:24:55,920
Yeah, exactly.

540
00:24:55,920 --> 00:24:56,920
It's always that.

541
00:24:56,920 --> 00:25:02,280
Like my higher reasoning skills tell me, no, there's no way this happened.

542
00:25:02,280 --> 00:25:03,280
But I don't care.

543
00:25:03,280 --> 00:25:04,320
I want it to be true.

544
00:25:04,320 --> 00:25:05,920
And so it's going to be true for me.

545
00:25:05,920 --> 00:25:10,320
But for the same reason that I don't believe in like, you know, like the stories in the

546
00:25:10,320 --> 00:25:13,720
Bible and stuff like that that were written three and four hundred years after, you know,

547
00:25:13,720 --> 00:25:18,680
anybody they're all, it's like the game of, you know, of telephone in a classroom.

548
00:25:18,680 --> 00:25:23,880
You can't tell a story around, you know, 15 kids and it doesn't change, you know, not

549
00:25:23,880 --> 00:25:27,040
to mention, you know, 15 centuries of trying to tell a story or whatever.

550
00:25:27,040 --> 00:25:32,320
But, you know, it's just, you know, there was never a time when people were more magical

551
00:25:32,320 --> 00:25:33,320
than they are now.

552
00:25:33,320 --> 00:25:35,360
There was never a time when they were-

553
00:25:35,360 --> 00:25:36,360
Exactly.

554
00:25:36,360 --> 00:25:39,240
Especially back whenever people lived in caves and clay huts and shit.

555
00:25:39,240 --> 00:25:41,960
There's no way that they were more advanced than we are.

556
00:25:41,960 --> 00:25:45,040
Maybe they were extremely intelligent because they were able to do some amazing things.

557
00:25:45,040 --> 00:25:46,120
But they weren't mad.

558
00:25:46,120 --> 00:25:49,840
There was never a time in our existence when people were magical.

559
00:25:49,840 --> 00:25:51,840
There just wasn't, there was never real wizards.

560
00:25:51,840 --> 00:25:54,320
There was never a real, you know, like there just was.

561
00:25:54,320 --> 00:25:57,240
I just don't believe that that was actually a thing.

562
00:25:57,240 --> 00:26:00,440
I don't want to correct you, but have you ever seen David Blaine because-

563
00:26:00,440 --> 00:26:07,640
You should see what he can do with a deck of cards.

564
00:26:07,640 --> 00:26:08,640
He's magical.

565
00:26:08,640 --> 00:26:09,640
He's magical.

566
00:26:09,640 --> 00:26:11,400
Yoshi can now bend spoons.

567
00:26:11,400 --> 00:26:12,400
So I mean-

568
00:26:12,400 --> 00:26:13,400
Yep.

569
00:26:13,400 --> 00:26:14,400
That's true.

570
00:26:14,400 --> 00:26:17,080
So could Yuri Geller until they found out later that it was all bullshit.

571
00:26:17,080 --> 00:26:20,200
Now, Dave, tell me why Yoshi's story is true.

572
00:26:20,200 --> 00:26:22,440
Because now I need to know that this is true.

573
00:26:22,440 --> 00:26:23,440
Why is it true?

574
00:26:23,440 --> 00:26:24,440
Yes, it's true.

575
00:26:24,440 --> 00:26:25,440
Give me more.

576
00:26:25,440 --> 00:26:26,840
I'm about to break your heart.

577
00:26:26,840 --> 00:26:33,360
So once back on earth, the rock that he was gifted by the little starfish men, he had

578
00:26:33,360 --> 00:26:39,440
to analyze hoping for proof of his experience, but the tests revealed it to be a piece of

579
00:26:39,440 --> 00:26:42,400
stalactite from like a local cave in the region.

580
00:26:42,400 --> 00:26:43,400
Now-

581
00:26:43,400 --> 00:26:44,400
I hate you.

582
00:26:44,400 --> 00:26:45,400
I'm so sorry.

583
00:26:45,400 --> 00:26:52,000
That dude DMT will make you do some crazy things.

584
00:26:52,000 --> 00:26:58,000
No, Yoshi at this point was already getting ridiculed because he's going around telling

585
00:26:58,000 --> 00:27:03,560
people that he flew around the sun a bunch of times with the starfish people, but not

586
00:27:03,560 --> 00:27:07,280
only by those in the community, but eventually the press got wind of all of this.

587
00:27:07,280 --> 00:27:10,000
So now he's getting it from like all angles.

588
00:27:10,000 --> 00:27:15,360
So one would think, like with others who experienced extraterrestrial encounters, he'd become sort

589
00:27:15,360 --> 00:27:19,520
of like a recluse trying to avoid any further public scrutiny.

590
00:27:19,520 --> 00:27:20,520
Not our boy Yoshi.

591
00:27:20,520 --> 00:27:24,280
No, he went in the opposite direction.

592
00:27:24,280 --> 00:27:28,680
Like a sandwich made with chicken instead of bread, motherfucker doubled down.

593
00:27:28,680 --> 00:27:29,680
All right.

594
00:27:29,680 --> 00:27:30,680
Are you ready for this?

595
00:27:30,680 --> 00:27:31,680
Yes.

596
00:27:31,680 --> 00:27:32,680
Go Yoshi.

597
00:27:32,680 --> 00:27:40,260
So even though the Saran wrap starfish never came back, he continued to claim he was still

598
00:27:40,260 --> 00:27:42,680
in almost constant contact with them.

599
00:27:42,680 --> 00:27:48,760
He also began to refer to himself as the spokesperson for the quote unquote summon call space union

600
00:27:48,760 --> 00:27:51,400
or SAM call for short.

601
00:27:51,400 --> 00:27:55,720
He did not elaborate on who and or what would be summoned or why one would need to call

602
00:27:55,720 --> 00:27:56,720
upon them.

603
00:27:56,720 --> 00:28:00,560
Like what's the reason is don't seem super ominous.

604
00:28:00,560 --> 00:28:05,680
He even claimed that he was able to focus his psychic abilities, which allowed him to

605
00:28:05,680 --> 00:28:12,200
trans teleport over immense distances, claiming he could teleport to a star 250 million light

606
00:28:12,200 --> 00:28:17,200
years away in just six minutes, which if you can teleport, that seems like a long time.

607
00:28:17,200 --> 00:28:23,840
Yeah, it's a really long six minutes is a long way to go for teleportation.

608
00:28:23,840 --> 00:28:25,360
That's a long time.

609
00:28:25,360 --> 00:28:29,000
I think what happened here is that Yoshi's mushrooms didn't wear off.

610
00:28:29,000 --> 00:28:35,160
I think what happened here is that Yoshi, I think all drugs do are tapped.

611
00:28:35,160 --> 00:28:38,960
They open up channels in our brain that are already there.

612
00:28:38,960 --> 00:28:45,080
And unfortunately, some people, those channels just open up and that's they unfortunately,

613
00:28:45,080 --> 00:28:49,160
you know, delusional psychosis, split personality.

614
00:28:49,160 --> 00:28:53,600
That's whenever all kinds of things happen where people are genuinely seeing things that

615
00:28:53,600 --> 00:28:56,360
we can't see, but they're seeing it and experiencing it.

616
00:28:56,360 --> 00:29:00,760
Yeah, not to get too true crime podcasty, but he's fucking absolutely right.

617
00:29:00,760 --> 00:29:04,640
I mean, there's so many serial killers that like started doing drugs and then drinking

618
00:29:04,640 --> 00:29:07,720
blood from people because they thought their organs were disappearing.

619
00:29:07,720 --> 00:29:10,240
So it does make a lot of sense.

620
00:29:10,240 --> 00:29:16,880
Well, you think that, you know, I mean, there I never understood homeless people that like,

621
00:29:16,880 --> 00:29:19,960
you know, I would see in LA shouting at themselves in a window, right?

622
00:29:19,960 --> 00:29:21,280
Like having conversations with themselves.

623
00:29:21,280 --> 00:29:22,920
I'm like, what the hell?

624
00:29:22,920 --> 00:29:28,720
And then I did mushrooms and then I was like, oh, okay.

625
00:29:28,720 --> 00:29:29,720
Nevermind.

626
00:29:29,720 --> 00:29:32,400
You're living in your liver to stay inside you.

627
00:29:32,400 --> 00:29:33,400
Don't you see?

628
00:29:33,400 --> 00:29:36,280
Yeah, you can see things that aren't there that aren't happening.

629
00:29:36,280 --> 00:29:39,720
Like you can see a tree talking to you, but it's not really talking to you.

630
00:29:39,720 --> 00:29:43,720
I've taken acid where my face, I looked in a mirror and my face jumped off of my head

631
00:29:43,720 --> 00:29:46,280
down onto the table and started talking to me.

632
00:29:46,280 --> 00:29:47,280
I saw that.

633
00:29:47,280 --> 00:29:48,280
That sounds fucking awful.

634
00:29:48,280 --> 00:29:49,280
I would really have every second of that.

635
00:29:49,280 --> 00:29:50,280
It didn't really happen.

636
00:29:50,280 --> 00:29:51,280
It was so stressful.

637
00:29:51,280 --> 00:29:52,280
It was so stressful.

638
00:29:52,280 --> 00:29:53,280
Stressful?

639
00:29:53,280 --> 00:29:54,280
Yeah, I would say so.

640
00:29:54,280 --> 00:29:58,160
That's like downplaying that.

641
00:29:58,160 --> 00:29:59,160
The panic I would feel.

642
00:29:59,160 --> 00:30:01,220
The way you said that it was just like, great.

643
00:30:01,220 --> 00:30:03,200
Now my face is talking to me.

644
00:30:03,200 --> 00:30:04,200
Great.

645
00:30:04,200 --> 00:30:09,680
My brain tricking me because the chemistry in my brain was triggered so much.

646
00:30:09,680 --> 00:30:12,720
So that that channel opened up in our brain.

647
00:30:12,720 --> 00:30:16,880
All of our brains are, all of that stuff is in all of us.

648
00:30:16,880 --> 00:30:18,400
What door gets open?

649
00:30:18,400 --> 00:30:21,400
What channel gets open?

650
00:30:21,400 --> 00:30:25,820
It also could also be like, maybe it's not like a mental psychosis or even drugs.

651
00:30:25,820 --> 00:30:31,080
He lived his life as a mundane vegetable farmer every day in a small city in Japan.

652
00:30:31,080 --> 00:30:32,580
You know what I mean?

653
00:30:32,580 --> 00:30:34,480
Maybe he was like, I'm fucking done with this.

654
00:30:34,480 --> 00:30:35,480
Bored.

655
00:30:35,480 --> 00:30:36,480
Maybe he thought it was a good idea.

656
00:30:36,480 --> 00:30:37,480
Maybe he just snapped.

657
00:30:37,480 --> 00:30:43,040
Yeah, or like he could have just been like, you know, maybe he's like, he saw a fucking

658
00:30:43,040 --> 00:30:44,040
pro.

659
00:30:44,040 --> 00:30:48,120
He saw a program where somebody got rich off of one of these stories and he got, he was

660
00:30:48,120 --> 00:30:53,640
out there, you know, in the cold and the muck up to his waist for cabbage, cabbage, you

661
00:30:53,640 --> 00:30:54,640
know, he's like, fuck this.

662
00:30:54,640 --> 00:30:55,640
I'm going to get abducted by aliens.

663
00:30:55,640 --> 00:30:56,640
That's going to be really good.

664
00:30:56,640 --> 00:31:02,200
Yeah, I don't really blame him when I think about it that way because like, you know,

665
00:31:02,200 --> 00:31:06,920
if I'm a farmer in 1970s small town Japan, I'm probably going to take my show on the

666
00:31:06,920 --> 00:31:07,920
road.

667
00:31:07,920 --> 00:31:08,920
I need something better.

668
00:31:08,920 --> 00:31:09,920
Yeah.

669
00:31:09,920 --> 00:31:14,920
He read, he read the, the, the dude that, you know, is responsible for all the ancient

670
00:31:14,920 --> 00:31:20,040
alien stuff that, you know, that Dutch dude, they read that or whatever, you know, probably

671
00:31:20,040 --> 00:31:22,720
and he was like, Oh man, I need to come up with one of these stories.

672
00:31:22,720 --> 00:31:26,440
He said that guy sold how many books?

673
00:31:26,440 --> 00:31:27,440
Oh yeah.

674
00:31:27,440 --> 00:31:28,440
Oh yeah.

675
00:31:28,440 --> 00:31:32,040
Fuck this cabbage farming shit.

676
00:31:32,040 --> 00:31:36,280
So the, the, the teleportation, the psychic abilities, that's not even like the coolest

677
00:31:36,280 --> 00:31:38,880
thing that he's able to do now.

678
00:31:38,880 --> 00:31:43,600
He's now able to prevent natural disasters like earthquakes and volcanic eruptions.

679
00:31:43,600 --> 00:31:45,160
Now working out in Japan.

680
00:31:45,160 --> 00:31:46,160
Yeah.

681
00:31:46,160 --> 00:31:48,880
So how is he able to stop natural disasters like volcanoes?

682
00:31:48,880 --> 00:31:50,360
You may be asking.

683
00:31:50,360 --> 00:31:58,720
Well, Yoshi has access to not one, not two, but three UFOs stating quote, I have three

684
00:31:58,720 --> 00:32:05,240
UFOs for activities and usually I hide the barrier for activities.

685
00:32:05,240 --> 00:32:06,240
That's just greedy.

686
00:32:06,240 --> 00:32:09,160
The guy thinks he's like Jay Z of like alien.

687
00:32:09,160 --> 00:32:13,080
Like he's like, I got one's not enough.

688
00:32:13,080 --> 00:32:17,240
His episode of cribs is just like these, these are my UFOs.

689
00:32:17,240 --> 00:32:18,360
This one's murdered out.

690
00:32:18,360 --> 00:32:20,600
It's black on black.

691
00:32:20,600 --> 00:32:21,600
Just a shitty little shack.

692
00:32:21,600 --> 00:32:23,400
And then he's got these three.

693
00:32:23,400 --> 00:32:24,400
Yeah.

694
00:32:24,400 --> 00:32:25,400
Yeah.

695
00:32:25,400 --> 00:32:28,200
We all realize Yoshi is so full of shit.

696
00:32:28,200 --> 00:32:30,400
Nah, dude, he's baller as fuck.

697
00:32:30,400 --> 00:32:36,960
One of his UFO is just a giant spinner.

698
00:32:36,960 --> 00:32:37,960
I think Yoshi.

699
00:32:37,960 --> 00:32:38,960
Yeah.

700
00:32:38,960 --> 00:32:39,960
All right.

701
00:32:39,960 --> 00:32:40,960
Back to Yoshi.

702
00:32:40,960 --> 00:32:41,960
All right.

703
00:32:41,960 --> 00:32:46,520
So Yoshi, we now know that he has not one, not two, but three UFOs that he just has for

704
00:32:46,520 --> 00:32:47,520
activities.

705
00:32:47,520 --> 00:32:52,400
Now he claims that these UFOs allow him to travel inside the hollow earth.

706
00:32:52,400 --> 00:32:54,440
Oh, thank God.

707
00:32:54,440 --> 00:32:59,560
Did he at least say that when we was up there scouting around in space that the earth was

708
00:32:59,560 --> 00:33:00,560
round?

709
00:33:00,560 --> 00:33:01,560
Please at least tell me that.

710
00:33:01,560 --> 00:33:03,200
At least it's a round hollow earth.

711
00:33:03,200 --> 00:33:04,720
It's round, but it's hollow.

712
00:33:04,720 --> 00:33:08,700
Now he can go inside the hollow earth and he can prevent the flow of magma by shoving

713
00:33:08,700 --> 00:33:11,880
rocks inside the volcano's inner channels.

714
00:33:11,880 --> 00:33:17,280
Now unclear if he, if he moved the rocks with like his mind or with UFO technology, it's

715
00:33:17,280 --> 00:33:19,800
also unclear on how he prevented earthquakes.

716
00:33:19,800 --> 00:33:23,920
Like the volcanoes I kind of get if you're blocking magma.

717
00:33:23,920 --> 00:33:26,600
Kind of, but I don't understand how you stop an earthquake, but either way.

718
00:33:26,600 --> 00:33:30,080
I mean, he kind of dropped the ball in 2004, 2011.

719
00:33:30,080 --> 00:33:33,720
I'm starting to get dumb.

720
00:33:33,720 --> 00:33:34,720
The story progresses.

721
00:33:34,720 --> 00:33:37,120
I feel like my IQ is lowering.

722
00:33:37,120 --> 00:33:38,120
Please continue.

723
00:33:38,120 --> 00:33:39,920
I don't need all these rains.

724
00:33:39,920 --> 00:33:40,920
I don't need all these rains.

725
00:33:40,920 --> 00:33:42,160
Those please continue.

726
00:33:42,160 --> 00:33:46,120
So this is the part of the episode where we salute you Yoshi.

727
00:33:46,120 --> 00:33:50,320
Thank you for preventing an unspecified number of earthquakes and volcanic eruptions.

728
00:33:50,320 --> 00:33:51,320
Yeah.

729
00:33:51,320 --> 00:33:55,560
I mean, when you see the ones that did happen and you think like, man, you could be dead

730
00:33:55,560 --> 00:33:56,560
by now.

731
00:33:56,560 --> 00:33:59,400
I think it's a Fukushima power plant.

732
00:33:59,400 --> 00:34:00,400
Yeah.

733
00:34:00,400 --> 00:34:02,360
They didn't, they haven't, I think they would bet.

734
00:34:02,360 --> 00:34:04,680
He probably stopped like Yellowstone.

735
00:34:04,680 --> 00:34:05,680
Maybe he was dead.

736
00:34:05,680 --> 00:34:07,800
He was already 30 in 1980.

737
00:34:07,800 --> 00:34:11,400
So maybe he didn't like make it.

738
00:34:11,400 --> 00:34:13,200
Maybe, maybe.

739
00:34:13,200 --> 00:34:15,200
Anyways, but that's it.

740
00:34:15,200 --> 00:34:20,400
That's, that's all there is to know about Yoshi and his, there's no real conclusion.

741
00:34:20,400 --> 00:34:22,400
I think that's all we need to know.

742
00:34:22,400 --> 00:34:23,400
Yeah.

743
00:34:23,400 --> 00:34:24,400
This is a roller coaster.

744
00:34:24,400 --> 00:34:25,400
I went from love and death to love and death to love and death to love and death to love

745
00:34:25,400 --> 00:34:26,400
and death to love and death to love and death to love and death to love and death to love

746
00:34:26,400 --> 00:34:27,400
and death to love and death to love and death to love and death to love and death to love

747
00:34:27,400 --> 00:34:28,400
and death to love and death to love and death to.

748
00:34:28,400 --> 00:34:29,400
And loving Yoshi in his story, to thinking he's a dickhead.

749
00:34:29,400 --> 00:34:30,600
He's got a piece of shit.

750
00:34:30,600 --> 00:34:32,600
Yeah, he's got a piece of shit.

751
00:34:32,600 --> 00:34:34,920
They got stupid, but I'll tell you, it is fun.

752
00:34:34,920 --> 00:34:36,820
And I would love to believe that it's true.

753
00:34:36,820 --> 00:34:38,320
It's a fun story.

754
00:34:38,320 --> 00:34:39,320
It is a fun story.

755
00:34:39,320 --> 00:34:40,320
I've never heard this one.

756
00:34:40,320 --> 00:34:43,040
I've seen this seems like there's probably a reason.

757
00:34:43,040 --> 00:34:50,140
Um, but it does, it does feel like it, just a, it feels like an app, an anime, like an

758
00:34:50,140 --> 00:34:51,140
episode of yeah.

759
00:34:51,140 --> 00:34:54,700
It's like a, it's like a manga that went off course.

760
00:34:54,700 --> 00:34:55,700
Yeah.

761
00:34:55,700 --> 00:34:58,380
If anything, this is a filler episode of Anatomy.

762
00:34:58,380 --> 00:34:59,380
It's not the main story.

763
00:34:59,380 --> 00:35:00,380
This is the filler episode.

764
00:35:00,380 --> 00:35:01,380
No, it's not the main story.

765
00:35:01,380 --> 00:35:02,380
This is just like a side quest.

766
00:35:02,380 --> 00:35:03,600
Well, it's like a cultural thing.

767
00:35:03,600 --> 00:35:10,680
It's like when you go to, say, if you watch ghost hunting videos, which I now I just think

768
00:35:10,680 --> 00:35:17,700
are just all mostly so dumb, wherever you go, whatever spirit is there regionally is

769
00:35:17,700 --> 00:35:18,900
the one that always shows up.

770
00:35:18,900 --> 00:35:23,620
So if you're in the Middle East, the ghost always shows up in fire, right?

771
00:35:23,620 --> 00:35:24,620
Fire always shows up.

772
00:35:24,620 --> 00:35:26,780
It's like a djinn or something like that.

773
00:35:26,780 --> 00:35:30,940
The djinn always show up in fire and they're all these completely black little creatures

774
00:35:30,940 --> 00:35:31,940
with long hair.

775
00:35:31,940 --> 00:35:34,860
They can tell somebody was just painted black and they act weird.

776
00:35:34,860 --> 00:35:39,220
But in Japan, it's always the white faced girl with the black eyes and the black hair.

777
00:35:39,220 --> 00:35:50,380
And so the fact that the culture defines the entity is more reason for me to believe more

778
00:35:50,380 --> 00:35:56,260
than not that it's not true and that it's, you know, I mean, maybe the ghosts are landlocked

779
00:35:56,260 --> 00:35:57,260
though.

780
00:35:57,260 --> 00:36:01,580
I mean, you know, the same reason we don't have giraffes here in America, but are they

781
00:36:01,580 --> 00:36:09,180
just so uncreative that they just do the exact same thing that the last Damon did or the

782
00:36:09,180 --> 00:36:10,180
last ghost did?

783
00:36:10,180 --> 00:36:12,180
Like none of them have any originality.

784
00:36:12,180 --> 00:36:16,340
Like, it's like, I'm, I can't wait to die and be a ghost so I can be a pale faced girl

785
00:36:16,340 --> 00:36:17,660
with black eyes and black hair.

786
00:36:17,660 --> 00:36:20,580
I mean, I wouldn't mind being that ghost.

787
00:36:20,580 --> 00:36:21,580
Right.

788
00:36:21,580 --> 00:36:24,860
I mean, if you're going to be one, if you're going to be one, you want to be the one with

789
00:36:24,860 --> 00:36:29,700
the head down and the long hair and you want to like twitch around, make people uncomfortable.

790
00:36:29,700 --> 00:36:32,220
I just always said that if I'm going to be, if I'm going to be a ghost, I just want to

791
00:36:32,220 --> 00:36:39,660
haunt a place that has like a really good, uh, like TV and cable set up so I can watch

792
00:36:39,660 --> 00:36:41,860
some good shit while I'm haunting the place.

793
00:36:41,860 --> 00:36:43,420
Or at least a good sound system.

794
00:36:43,420 --> 00:36:44,420
Yeah.

795
00:36:44,420 --> 00:36:45,420
Good sound system.

796
00:36:45,420 --> 00:36:46,420
Good sound system.

797
00:36:46,420 --> 00:36:47,420
Yeah.

798
00:36:47,420 --> 00:36:50,020
Like the

799
00:36:50,020 --> 00:36:53,340
I'll haunt you guys in a minute, but the Mr. Plow Simpsons episode is on.

800
00:36:53,340 --> 00:36:54,340
So it's kind of my jam.

801
00:36:54,340 --> 00:36:55,340
Okay.

802
00:36:55,340 --> 00:36:56,340
I've seen that one.

803
00:36:56,340 --> 00:36:59,340
I don't know if I've seen that.

804
00:36:59,340 --> 00:37:00,340
Mr. Plow, it's a good episode.

805
00:37:00,340 --> 00:37:01,340
Yeah.

806
00:37:01,340 --> 00:37:02,340
Don't worry about it.

807
00:37:02,340 --> 00:37:07,620
Anyway, so I guess, I guess we're just going to breeze past that Sarge, whatever that was,

808
00:37:07,620 --> 00:37:08,620
but uh,

809
00:37:08,620 --> 00:37:10,540
Linda, Linda Ronstadt's in it.

810
00:37:10,540 --> 00:37:11,540
That's all I'm saying.

811
00:37:11,540 --> 00:37:12,540
Okay.

812
00:37:12,540 --> 00:37:16,700
Well, anyway, so I'm going to start with you, Jeremy thoughts, questions, concerns, comments,

813
00:37:16,700 --> 00:37:19,380
anything you want to talk about this episode?

814
00:37:19,380 --> 00:37:24,420
I just, yeah, you know, I mean, I wanted it so bad to be true, right?

815
00:37:24,420 --> 00:37:27,820
I mean, it started off when you started doubling down is when it kind of got off the rails.

816
00:37:27,820 --> 00:37:32,160
I feel like, yeah, you know, I think that it's like almost like that he does protest

817
00:37:32,160 --> 00:37:33,160
too much kind of thing.

818
00:37:33,160 --> 00:37:38,100
Like if he would have just left it alone, it would have been easier to digest.

819
00:37:38,100 --> 00:37:45,860
But because he felt like he had to keep adding dumb fuel to the dumb fire, it just kind of

820
00:37:45,860 --> 00:37:48,020
just kept getting more dumb.

821
00:37:48,020 --> 00:37:49,140
Yeah.

822
00:37:49,140 --> 00:37:57,260
And so he basically delegitimize himself by feeling like he had to overcook it, by overcook,

823
00:37:57,260 --> 00:37:58,260
overcooking it.

824
00:37:58,260 --> 00:38:01,380
The ego, the narcissism, you know what I mean?

825
00:38:01,380 --> 00:38:08,420
Like so the, it makes me, so the somebody that, that with that type of hubris, uh, is

826
00:38:08,420 --> 00:38:13,260
capable, somebody that's capable of making up the backend part of that story is capable

827
00:38:13,260 --> 00:38:15,460
of making up the front end part of that story.

828
00:38:15,460 --> 00:38:16,460
Yeah.

829
00:38:16,460 --> 00:38:20,140
But I mean, it could also be like, maybe he did experience something and then he was like,

830
00:38:20,140 --> 00:38:22,020
well, now this is my meal ticket.

831
00:38:22,020 --> 00:38:26,340
Now I have to make it even more crazy because like no one's going to just buy the story

832
00:38:26,340 --> 00:38:29,380
of a dude who has abducted and then just dropped on top of a mountain.

833
00:38:29,380 --> 00:38:33,940
I mean, they probably could, but like if you make it way more Fanta, like Fanta fizzle,

834
00:38:33,940 --> 00:38:35,620
what are the words?

835
00:38:35,620 --> 00:38:36,620
Fantastic.

836
00:38:36,620 --> 00:38:37,620
Fantastic.

837
00:38:37,620 --> 00:38:38,620
Sure.

838
00:38:38,620 --> 00:38:40,220
That word is way more interesting though.

839
00:38:40,220 --> 00:38:42,180
That was a much better words.

840
00:38:42,180 --> 00:38:43,180
It was aggressive.

841
00:38:43,180 --> 00:38:50,900
You know, maybe he was thinking like, I gotta make this way more fascinating, way more like

842
00:38:50,900 --> 00:38:54,300
crazy for to try and get a bigger buck out of it.

843
00:38:54,300 --> 00:38:58,540
It could be that maybe he did see a too close to the sun.

844
00:38:58,540 --> 00:38:59,540
Like literally.

845
00:38:59,540 --> 00:39:00,540
Yeah, he did.

846
00:39:00,540 --> 00:39:08,660
But, but only in the one that goes close to the sun, he's got three.

847
00:39:08,660 --> 00:39:12,620
One of them goes under the water.

848
00:39:12,620 --> 00:39:13,620
That's true.

849
00:39:13,620 --> 00:39:15,180
One's just for the ladies.

850
00:39:15,180 --> 00:39:16,620
One just has spinners in it.

851
00:39:16,620 --> 00:39:19,540
It's like a nice couches inside.

852
00:39:19,540 --> 00:39:20,980
Exhibit came in fucking pimps UFO.

853
00:39:20,980 --> 00:39:23,880
Hey man, I heard you like spaceship.

854
00:39:23,880 --> 00:39:25,900
So I made you spaceship a spaceship.

855
00:39:25,900 --> 00:39:28,900
Yeah, something like that.

856
00:39:28,900 --> 00:39:29,900
All right.

857
00:39:29,900 --> 00:39:32,100
So how are you feeling?

858
00:39:32,100 --> 00:39:33,860
You got thoughts, questions, concerns?

859
00:39:33,860 --> 00:39:38,060
I am heartbroken at the turn it took because I was ready to just believe that there was

860
00:39:38,060 --> 00:39:41,260
some lonely aliens that found a lonely farmer.

861
00:39:41,260 --> 00:39:46,540
Still as old as time, you know, a buddy caught movie, but instead of cops, the aliens and

862
00:39:46,540 --> 00:39:48,220
a guy.

863
00:39:48,220 --> 00:39:52,420
And then he just doubled down and he was like, let's go to space a couple of times.

864
00:39:52,420 --> 00:39:54,320
He should have left well enough alone.

865
00:39:54,320 --> 00:39:57,060
Like the rock thing, like just, just, just keeping your house.

866
00:39:57,060 --> 00:39:59,340
Don't get analyzed and just say that it was a rock.

867
00:39:59,340 --> 00:40:00,340
You know what I mean?

868
00:40:00,340 --> 00:40:01,340
Yeah.

869
00:40:01,340 --> 00:40:07,300
I think what happened is he got really high and thought all this happened, found a rock

870
00:40:07,300 --> 00:40:14,620
where he thought he was on Titan and then when they told him it wasn't that he was like,

871
00:40:14,620 --> 00:40:19,520
oh, it must have been all the drugs I did better double down.

872
00:40:19,520 --> 00:40:21,740
So no one thinks I'm on drugs.

873
00:40:21,740 --> 00:40:28,260
He also could be like epileptic and have these weird seizures where he has bizarre brain

874
00:40:28,260 --> 00:40:33,740
electric activity that could be passed out on top of the mountain too.

875
00:40:33,740 --> 00:40:38,100
But then one, another thing I don't buy though is that the friends just let him go.

876
00:40:38,100 --> 00:40:40,700
And then all of a sudden he came back with this crazy story.

877
00:40:40,700 --> 00:40:43,100
Like give me a break.

878
00:40:43,100 --> 00:40:44,660
They waited an hour and a half.

879
00:40:44,660 --> 00:40:48,700
They're like, we're going to wait here for you while you go visit with your alien friends.

880
00:40:48,700 --> 00:40:49,980
You don't have to prove it.

881
00:40:49,980 --> 00:40:51,780
We believe you.

882
00:40:51,780 --> 00:40:54,460
Which she did friends that they weren't like, take us with you.

883
00:40:54,460 --> 00:40:55,460
Yeah.

884
00:40:55,460 --> 00:40:57,940
They're like, prove it.

885
00:40:57,940 --> 00:40:58,940
Well he did prove it.

886
00:40:58,940 --> 00:40:59,940
He brought back the rock.

887
00:40:59,940 --> 00:41:05,300
So they basically went out to the caves.

888
00:41:05,300 --> 00:41:08,900
They went out to the caves and he went into the cave, got some, brought it out and said,

889
00:41:08,900 --> 00:41:10,620
you're not never going to believe what happened.

890
00:41:10,620 --> 00:41:12,780
And they're like, you're right.

891
00:41:12,780 --> 00:41:17,060
Maybe there was like a methane leak in the cave.

892
00:41:17,060 --> 00:41:20,460
So like while he was in there, he was like bringing it in.

893
00:41:20,460 --> 00:41:23,860
He didn't have his canary with him and there was no way to tell.

894
00:41:23,860 --> 00:41:24,860
He didn't realize.

895
00:41:24,860 --> 00:41:25,860
Yeah.

896
00:41:25,860 --> 00:41:26,860
Yeah.

897
00:41:26,860 --> 00:41:27,860
They didn't realize.

898
00:41:27,860 --> 00:41:28,860
Maybe that's the thing the whole time.

899
00:41:28,860 --> 00:41:33,180
Maybe he just had like a gas leak in his house and he didn't realize it.

900
00:41:33,180 --> 00:41:41,380
And so he was going, you know, cause there's this great story about this guy who kept finding

901
00:41:41,380 --> 00:41:46,660
post-it notes around his house and he literally thought his house was haunted.

902
00:41:46,660 --> 00:41:52,020
But because out of nowhere, all these post-it notes would always be showing up and he didn't

903
00:41:52,020 --> 00:41:53,420
know where they were coming from.

904
00:41:53,420 --> 00:41:57,260
And it turned out that it was a, was it carbon monoxide or carbon dioxide?

905
00:41:57,260 --> 00:41:58,260
Yeah.

906
00:41:58,260 --> 00:41:59,260
It was carbon monoxide.

907
00:41:59,260 --> 00:42:00,260
Yeah.

908
00:42:00,260 --> 00:42:01,260
It was carbon monoxide.

909
00:42:01,260 --> 00:42:02,820
It was like being slowly poisoned with carbon monoxide.

910
00:42:02,820 --> 00:42:03,820
Yeah.

911
00:42:03,820 --> 00:42:05,540
And he wasn't remembering and recalling it.

912
00:42:05,540 --> 00:42:06,540
Yeah.

913
00:42:06,540 --> 00:42:07,540
Hold on.

914
00:42:07,540 --> 00:42:11,100
Isn't that just the plot to the movie, the others with Nicole Kidman?

915
00:42:11,100 --> 00:42:12,100
Isn't that?

916
00:42:12,100 --> 00:42:13,100
No, no, no.

917
00:42:13,100 --> 00:42:14,100
This is, so this is different.

918
00:42:14,100 --> 00:42:15,780
That's kind of, that's, that's kind of what.

919
00:42:15,780 --> 00:42:16,780
No, no, no.

920
00:42:16,780 --> 00:42:17,780
This is different because it was on Reddit.

921
00:42:17,780 --> 00:42:23,140
But I don't care if it's true.

922
00:42:23,140 --> 00:42:24,500
It's a great story.

923
00:42:24,500 --> 00:42:28,740
So, so there's a lot of, so when you think about all of the things that it possibly could

924
00:42:28,740 --> 00:42:33,700
be, other than actual scabby alien starfish showing up.

925
00:42:33,700 --> 00:42:34,700
Yeah.

926
00:42:34,700 --> 00:42:35,700
He's a farmer.

927
00:42:35,700 --> 00:42:38,860
I'm sure he's working with like pesticides, manures, things like that.

928
00:42:38,860 --> 00:42:40,300
Like 100%.

929
00:42:40,300 --> 00:42:42,700
Like toxicology wise, he's probably not doing great.

930
00:42:42,700 --> 00:42:44,700
You guys know about the dance.

931
00:42:44,700 --> 00:42:47,980
Did you guys, did you guys ever hear about the dancing pandemic and like, I think it

932
00:42:47,980 --> 00:42:48,980
was like a.

933
00:42:48,980 --> 00:42:49,980
Yeah.

934
00:42:49,980 --> 00:42:50,980
The France.

935
00:42:50,980 --> 00:42:51,980
Yeah.

936
00:42:51,980 --> 00:42:53,620
It could be something like that.

937
00:42:53,620 --> 00:42:56,100
It could be something that, you know, seeps into his skin from the.

938
00:42:56,100 --> 00:42:57,100
Yeah.

939
00:42:57,100 --> 00:43:00,100
There was the dancing pandemic and then in Africa, I think there was also the laughing,

940
00:43:00,100 --> 00:43:01,100
the laughing pant.

941
00:43:01,100 --> 00:43:02,100
Yeah.

942
00:43:02,100 --> 00:43:03,100
Yeah.

943
00:43:03,100 --> 00:43:04,100
Yeah.

944
00:43:04,100 --> 00:43:05,100
Yeah.

945
00:43:05,100 --> 00:43:06,100
Everyone laughs themselves to death.

946
00:43:06,100 --> 00:43:07,100
Well, that's it.

947
00:43:07,100 --> 00:43:08,100
That's our episode.

948
00:43:08,100 --> 00:43:09,100
Thank you so much for everyone who listened.

949
00:43:09,100 --> 00:43:10,100
Thank you to Jeremy for coming on.

950
00:43:10,100 --> 00:43:11,340
Thanks to Sarge for always being here.

951
00:43:11,340 --> 00:43:13,620
Jeremy, before we go, is there anything that you want to plug?

952
00:43:13,620 --> 00:43:14,660
You got anything going on?

953
00:43:14,660 --> 00:43:15,660
Anything you want?

954
00:43:15,660 --> 00:43:18,100
Oh man, I've got a movie called Boneface that's about to come out.

955
00:43:18,100 --> 00:43:19,100
It is not a porn.

956
00:43:19,100 --> 00:43:20,100
I promise you.

957
00:43:20,100 --> 00:43:21,100
Well, damn.

958
00:43:21,100 --> 00:43:23,700
No one's going to want to watch it now.

959
00:43:23,700 --> 00:43:24,700
It's Slasher in the Woods.

960
00:43:24,700 --> 00:43:25,700
You don't want to see me naked.

961
00:43:25,700 --> 00:43:26,700
I'm 52.

962
00:43:26,700 --> 00:43:31,900
I, it's a Slasher in the Woods kind of whodunit thing.

963
00:43:31,900 --> 00:43:36,380
And I get to play the, you know, the sheriff sort of Sherlock Holmes role in it.

964
00:43:36,380 --> 00:43:39,020
So that's kind of fun.

965
00:43:39,020 --> 00:43:43,180
And also another movie on that you can get on Amazon called Open.

966
00:43:43,180 --> 00:43:47,100
Sort of this fun kind of has a musical element to it.

967
00:43:47,100 --> 00:43:50,220
You know, dramedy, dark comedy.

968
00:43:50,220 --> 00:43:51,220
Sweet.

969
00:43:51,220 --> 00:43:52,220
Like that.

970
00:43:52,220 --> 00:43:53,220
And yeah, yeah.

971
00:43:53,220 --> 00:43:58,580
Just, just finished a movie called The Neglected with Josh Duhamel and Dylan Sprouse.

972
00:43:58,580 --> 00:44:01,260
Oh, hell yeah.

973
00:44:01,260 --> 00:44:05,060
And yeah, it's the 30th anniversary this year of Mallrats.

974
00:44:05,060 --> 00:44:09,340
So we're going to be doing some Mallrats events this year.

975
00:44:09,340 --> 00:44:11,540
So my buddy, he's a big Kevin Smith fan.

976
00:44:11,540 --> 00:44:17,700
He did want to ask, he wanted me to ask you if Mallrats 2 is actually still going forward.

977
00:44:17,700 --> 00:44:19,700
It'll never happen.

978
00:44:19,700 --> 00:44:26,020
Kevin announced it was going to happen when my son was six months old.

979
00:44:26,020 --> 00:44:27,660
He announced it when my son was six months old.

980
00:44:27,660 --> 00:44:29,300
My son's almost 11.

981
00:44:29,300 --> 00:44:31,900
So I'm pretty sure it's not going to happen.

982
00:44:31,900 --> 00:44:35,340
And not to mention, I think that since we lost Shannon, that's probably like a big,

983
00:44:35,340 --> 00:44:36,340
yeah, that's true.

984
00:44:36,340 --> 00:44:37,340
That's a big loss.

985
00:44:37,340 --> 00:44:41,460
Might have been a part of the story that he doesn't know.

986
00:44:41,460 --> 00:44:47,260
So, Sarge, is there anything you want to plug before we side off?

987
00:44:47,260 --> 00:44:49,980
SargesSuperNormal.com for the coloring book.

988
00:44:49,980 --> 00:44:53,540
If you're still interested, I know I've been beating this horse for quite a while, but

989
00:44:53,540 --> 00:44:56,660
if you still haven't purchased it for $9.99, you can get it.

990
00:44:56,660 --> 00:45:01,300
It's a lot of fun, a lot of pages for you to take out your frustrations on the current

991
00:45:01,300 --> 00:45:05,420
administration that's probably going to last for the rest of our lives.

992
00:45:05,420 --> 00:45:09,060
And then otherwise, TikTok's fucked off, but I'm still on Instagram.

993
00:45:09,060 --> 00:45:10,060
It's back.

994
00:45:10,060 --> 00:45:11,060
It's back.

995
00:45:11,060 --> 00:45:12,060
Oh, yeah.

996
00:45:12,060 --> 00:45:13,060
Oh, I missed it.

997
00:45:13,060 --> 00:45:14,060
I missed it.

998
00:45:14,060 --> 00:45:18,220
It was like back when the big old Trump brought it back for you kids.

999
00:45:18,220 --> 00:45:24,220
Yeah, I went on the spot and it had that notification saying like shut down.

1000
00:45:24,220 --> 00:45:25,220
Yeah.

1001
00:45:25,220 --> 00:45:29,700
And then I went on like two hours ago and it was right back to what it was.

1002
00:45:29,700 --> 00:45:30,700
Yeah, it's bananas.

1003
00:45:30,700 --> 00:45:31,700
It's not ideal.

1004
00:45:31,700 --> 00:45:32,700
I have no idea.

1005
00:45:32,700 --> 00:45:35,020
I felt so bad for that guy that we talked to.

1006
00:45:35,020 --> 00:45:37,340
You sent me, I felt so bad for him.

1007
00:45:37,340 --> 00:45:40,500
I was like, buddy, you can find me on other places.

1008
00:45:40,500 --> 00:45:41,500
I'll find you.

1009
00:45:41,500 --> 00:45:46,620
We'll still be friends, but I'm glad it's back because my my son, he does stop motion

1010
00:45:46,620 --> 00:45:48,100
animation with Lego.

1011
00:45:48,100 --> 00:45:49,540
Hell yeah.

1012
00:45:49,540 --> 00:45:51,380
His name is Mr. Emmett on TikTok.

1013
00:45:51,380 --> 00:45:52,380
He's got 30 followers.

1014
00:45:52,380 --> 00:45:54,380
Oh, that's my son will follow.

1015
00:45:54,380 --> 00:45:55,980
My son would like that.

1016
00:45:55,980 --> 00:45:57,700
Yeah, he was heartbroken yesterday.

1017
00:45:57,700 --> 00:46:01,620
So I'm going to I'm going to go and tell him as soon as we're done here because he's going

1018
00:46:01,620 --> 00:46:02,620
to be so excited.

1019
00:46:02,620 --> 00:46:03,620
Yeah.

1020
00:46:03,620 --> 00:46:05,100
So check out Jeremy's movies.

1021
00:46:05,100 --> 00:46:06,100
He's got a bunch coming out.

1022
00:46:06,100 --> 00:46:07,620
Check out Sarge's coloring book.

1023
00:46:07,620 --> 00:46:09,100
He's got the one coming out.

1024
00:46:09,100 --> 00:46:10,660
It's already out.

1025
00:46:10,660 --> 00:46:13,060
You can buy it right now.

1026
00:46:13,060 --> 00:46:14,380
You follow us.

1027
00:46:14,380 --> 00:46:17,380
You can follow us on Instagram at Crypto Cocktail.

1028
00:46:17,380 --> 00:46:18,860
Follow us on TikTok.

1029
00:46:18,860 --> 00:46:20,780
Maybe still at Crypto Cocktail Party.

1030
00:46:20,780 --> 00:46:22,940
It's a Patreon.

1031
00:46:22,940 --> 00:46:24,520
We just decided to do that.

1032
00:46:24,520 --> 00:46:28,700
If you if you're not feeling like you want to spend a bunch of money and you don't care

1033
00:46:28,700 --> 00:46:30,100
about bells and whistles, we have a tier.

1034
00:46:30,100 --> 00:46:31,300
It's only three dollars a month.

1035
00:46:31,300 --> 00:46:33,420
It's the friend of the show tier.

1036
00:46:33,420 --> 00:46:38,240
Three dollars just supports the show, helps us podcasting get expensive.

1037
00:46:38,240 --> 00:46:43,140
If you want some fancy stuff, we have a tier that's called the nerd tier.

1038
00:46:43,140 --> 00:46:45,220
It's seven dollars a month.

1039
00:46:45,220 --> 00:46:50,460
You're going to get unedited video episodes starting with this one today with Mr. Jeremy

1040
00:46:50,460 --> 00:46:51,460
London.

1041
00:46:51,460 --> 00:46:54,060
So you can watch me drink and vape in real time.

1042
00:46:54,060 --> 00:46:55,700
Yeah, it's going to be great.

1043
00:46:55,700 --> 00:46:57,020
It'll be unedited.

1044
00:46:57,020 --> 00:47:02,060
So whatever, you know, you don't hear in the audio version, you'll hear in this one.

1045
00:47:02,060 --> 00:47:10,340
You hear all of Sarge's parts, his belly rumbling, his belly rumbling.

1046
00:47:10,340 --> 00:47:13,900
So yeah, so consider consider supporting the show at a three or seven dollars.

1047
00:47:13,900 --> 00:47:18,140
It doesn't really matter, but you'll get some cool stuff here and there.

1048
00:47:18,140 --> 00:47:19,580
Bonus content, stuff like that.

1049
00:47:19,580 --> 00:47:23,620
And with that out of the way, normally at the end of the episode, I'll ask Sarge if

1050
00:47:23,620 --> 00:47:25,500
he wants to say goodbye and I love you to the audience.

1051
00:47:25,500 --> 00:47:29,660
But Jeremy, I feel like this episode would you like to say goodbye and I love you to

1052
00:47:29,660 --> 00:47:30,660
the audience?

1053
00:47:30,660 --> 00:47:32,740
Well, this is the thing.

1054
00:47:32,740 --> 00:47:33,740
It's been real.

1055
00:47:33,740 --> 00:47:36,760
Listen, it's not you.

1056
00:47:36,760 --> 00:47:37,760
It's me.

1057
00:47:37,760 --> 00:47:48,660
I've got a place where I have I have to move on so that you can be a better person.

1058
00:47:48,660 --> 00:47:50,060
I'm just bringing you down.

1059
00:47:50,060 --> 00:47:51,500
I'm just dragging you down.

1060
00:47:51,500 --> 00:47:52,940
I really am.

1061
00:47:52,940 --> 00:47:56,960
And if I just keep doing this, you guys will never ever get to you.

1062
00:47:56,960 --> 00:47:57,960
Whatever it is you're doing.

1063
00:47:57,960 --> 00:47:59,140
You never see your full potential.

1064
00:47:59,140 --> 00:48:03,220
No, you'll never see it because I'm just going to keep it going and going and dragging you

1065
00:48:03,220 --> 00:48:04,220
down.

1066
00:48:04,220 --> 00:48:06,340
Eventually, you're just going to get bitter.

1067
00:48:06,340 --> 00:48:09,140
If I ever need to break up with someone, I'm using that.

1068
00:48:09,140 --> 00:48:10,380
That was it.

1069
00:48:10,380 --> 00:48:11,380
It's not you.

1070
00:48:11,380 --> 00:48:12,380
It's me.

1071
00:48:12,380 --> 00:48:13,380
I felt empowered.

1072
00:48:13,380 --> 00:48:40,800
I got my better based.