1 00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:28,640 Hey everybody, welcome back to another episode of Cryptic Cocktail Party Show where we have 2 00:00:28,640 --> 00:00:31,560 a few drinks, share a few laughs, take a dive into the unknown. 3 00:00:31,560 --> 00:00:34,920 I'm your host Dave, joined as always by my wonderful co-host Sarge. 4 00:00:34,920 --> 00:00:35,920 How's it going Sarge? 5 00:00:35,920 --> 00:00:36,920 Woo! 6 00:00:36,920 --> 00:00:37,920 What's up? 7 00:00:37,920 --> 00:00:40,880 Don't want anybody to panic. 8 00:00:40,880 --> 00:00:43,360 I know I talked about going to church last Sunday. 9 00:00:43,360 --> 00:00:46,120 I didn't do that today. 10 00:00:46,120 --> 00:00:47,400 I'm not a church guy. 11 00:00:47,400 --> 00:00:51,240 I just went because my dad was doing a thing and he loves church. 12 00:00:51,240 --> 00:00:53,840 So well, thank God. 13 00:00:53,840 --> 00:00:54,840 Yeah. 14 00:00:54,840 --> 00:00:59,560 And the other voice you are hearing is our esteemed guest for this episode. 15 00:00:59,560 --> 00:01:01,640 Long time listener, first time guest. 16 00:01:01,640 --> 00:01:05,080 Our boy Bulk Detner aka Matthew. 17 00:01:05,080 --> 00:01:06,080 What's going on man? 18 00:01:06,080 --> 00:01:07,080 Oh, not much. 19 00:01:07,080 --> 00:01:08,080 Living life. 20 00:01:08,080 --> 00:01:09,080 Living life? 21 00:01:09,080 --> 00:01:10,080 Looking good, glorious. 22 00:01:10,080 --> 00:01:11,080 Glorious. 23 00:01:11,080 --> 00:01:12,080 For sure. 24 00:01:12,080 --> 00:01:15,160 I put on a new set of nails just for Sarge. 25 00:01:15,160 --> 00:01:18,400 Nails on point, braided beard, just exceptional. 26 00:01:18,400 --> 00:01:21,960 Oh, like a gender fluid Viking and I love it. 27 00:01:21,960 --> 00:01:22,960 Yeah. 28 00:01:22,960 --> 00:01:23,960 God damn. 29 00:01:23,960 --> 00:01:30,480 I've been called the bye king before and I really like that title. 30 00:01:30,480 --> 00:01:31,480 That's perfect. 31 00:01:31,480 --> 00:01:34,800 That's like if that's like if Lord of the Rings was written in 2024. 32 00:01:34,800 --> 00:01:38,960 Like fabulous nails, but can can inflict a blood eagle if needed. 33 00:01:38,960 --> 00:01:39,960 Blood eagle. 34 00:01:39,960 --> 00:01:40,960 Jesus Christ. 35 00:01:40,960 --> 00:01:44,640 I found out that that might not even actually have happened like in the medieval times. 36 00:01:44,640 --> 00:01:47,080 Did I learn that from you? 37 00:01:47,080 --> 00:01:52,200 You probably didn't learn it from me, but I had also heard that in I don't care. 38 00:01:52,200 --> 00:01:56,880 I wonder if it was one of those things that like never actually happened, but they're 39 00:01:56,880 --> 00:01:58,760 just like, oh yeah, no, we totally do that. 40 00:01:58,760 --> 00:01:59,760 So don't fuck up. 41 00:01:59,760 --> 00:02:03,200 Yeah, kind of like the brazen bowl where it was like something they talked they talked 42 00:02:03,200 --> 00:02:08,280 about as like if you do this or Iron Maiden, the Iron Maiden is another one that turned 43 00:02:08,280 --> 00:02:09,280 out to not be real. 44 00:02:09,280 --> 00:02:13,400 I thought that's where I might have heard that from was when you on your other show 45 00:02:13,400 --> 00:02:16,840 did the sorry for burping right into the microphone. 46 00:02:16,840 --> 00:02:17,840 That's all right. 47 00:02:17,840 --> 00:02:20,400 That's an award winning burp right there. 48 00:02:20,400 --> 00:02:22,600 As we've said before, nothing burps like Narragansett. 49 00:02:22,600 --> 00:02:28,360 Yeah, I thought I learned that when you did the the torture things on your other show. 50 00:02:28,360 --> 00:02:29,440 I don't think so. 51 00:02:29,440 --> 00:02:30,440 I don't think so. 52 00:02:30,440 --> 00:02:34,560 But I wouldn't be surprised if if it wasn't real. 53 00:02:34,560 --> 00:02:37,440 Like so many medieval things are just bullshit. 54 00:02:37,440 --> 00:02:41,080 Yeah, I feel like also, you know how hard it would be to splay someone over from the 55 00:02:41,080 --> 00:02:43,240 back and then pull their lungs out? 56 00:02:43,240 --> 00:02:46,520 I mean, if anyone's going to do it, it's going to be the Vikings. 57 00:02:46,520 --> 00:02:49,360 Like they just they're a very creative punch. 58 00:02:49,360 --> 00:02:52,080 Yeah, and that's just like a friendly handshake for them. 59 00:02:52,080 --> 00:02:54,200 You know what I mean? 60 00:02:54,200 --> 00:02:58,760 The Vikings known for their creativity and brutality. 61 00:02:58,760 --> 00:02:59,760 This is our flag. 62 00:02:59,760 --> 00:03:00,760 Oh, what is it? 63 00:03:00,760 --> 00:03:01,760 Oh, that's Dave. 64 00:03:01,760 --> 00:03:02,760 Yeah. 65 00:03:02,760 --> 00:03:05,560 And my favorite part about them is that for the most part, they just hung out and they 66 00:03:05,560 --> 00:03:09,240 just like lived and they were like, hey, we're getting low on riches. 67 00:03:09,240 --> 00:03:11,520 Yeah, those spots have a lot of riches. 68 00:03:11,520 --> 00:03:12,520 Let's go have them. 69 00:03:12,520 --> 00:03:13,520 Yeah. 70 00:03:13,520 --> 00:03:14,520 Yes. 71 00:03:14,520 --> 00:03:16,240 You know, you know, you're running low on riches. 72 00:03:16,240 --> 00:03:17,240 Yeah. 73 00:03:17,240 --> 00:03:18,480 All right. 74 00:03:18,480 --> 00:03:19,480 Let's go. 75 00:03:19,480 --> 00:03:22,000 Let's go kick down the door of that place with the lowercase t. 76 00:03:22,000 --> 00:03:26,200 They seem like they got a lot of shit. 77 00:03:26,200 --> 00:03:29,160 All right, guys. 78 00:03:29,160 --> 00:03:31,120 So I got an episode for you guys. 79 00:03:31,120 --> 00:03:33,800 Are you are you ready to dive into this? 80 00:03:33,800 --> 00:03:34,800 I think it's a good one. 81 00:03:34,800 --> 00:03:35,800 Oh, yeah. 82 00:03:35,800 --> 00:03:36,800 It's kind of I'm excited. 83 00:03:36,800 --> 00:03:40,640 Yeah, it's kind of it's it's not something new that we've done, but it's a little different 84 00:03:40,640 --> 00:03:42,880 than what we normally do as far as the show goes. 85 00:03:42,880 --> 00:03:46,640 So oh, my fire alarm is going off and I 86 00:03:46,640 --> 00:03:50,440 guess, oh, I guess so. 87 00:03:50,440 --> 00:03:53,960 Long time listening to the show know that there's one cryptid that I vowed never to 88 00:03:53,960 --> 00:03:57,260 cover on this show, and that is Bigfoot. 89 00:03:57,260 --> 00:04:00,680 And I got my reasons, mostly because I don't believe in Bigfoot and I think Sasquatch is 90 00:04:00,680 --> 00:04:01,680 boring as hell. 91 00:04:01,680 --> 00:04:05,860 Plus, there are like a million other podcasts that cover Bigfoot exclusively, and they do 92 00:04:05,860 --> 00:04:12,040 a much better job covering him than I ever would because they actually care about. 93 00:04:12,040 --> 00:04:13,040 Yeah. 94 00:04:13,040 --> 00:04:14,040 Yeah. 95 00:04:14,040 --> 00:04:17,800 And so you're probably asking yourself, Dave, why are we just talking about how you'll never 96 00:04:17,800 --> 00:04:18,800 cover Bigfoot? 97 00:04:18,800 --> 00:04:25,080 Well, just because I think Bigfoot is lame doesn't mean that I don't think the subspecies 98 00:04:25,080 --> 00:04:27,560 in different variations of Sasquatch are. 99 00:04:27,560 --> 00:04:31,600 And we've actually covered a few of them like we did the mill race monster. 100 00:04:31,600 --> 00:04:34,340 We did the Murphys burrow mud monster. 101 00:04:34,340 --> 00:04:38,840 And we did, to be fair, we did cover the Bigfoot war of like, what was it, 1855 or some shit 102 00:04:38,840 --> 00:04:39,840 like that. 103 00:04:39,840 --> 00:04:40,840 Yeah. 104 00:04:40,840 --> 00:04:41,840 Yep. 105 00:04:41,840 --> 00:04:42,840 Oh, that one was good. 106 00:04:42,840 --> 00:04:47,560 And this week, I figured we would continue the trend of actively avoiding talking about 107 00:04:47,560 --> 00:04:53,840 Bigfoot proper and cover not one, but two Sasquatch variations from opposite sides of 108 00:04:53,840 --> 00:04:54,840 the country. 109 00:04:54,840 --> 00:04:57,840 You guys ready to dive in? 110 00:04:57,840 --> 00:04:58,840 Yes. 111 00:04:58,840 --> 00:04:59,840 Yeah. 112 00:04:59,840 --> 00:05:00,840 I didn't even know there were subspecies. 113 00:05:00,840 --> 00:05:01,840 I just think it was Sasquatch and Yeti. 114 00:05:01,840 --> 00:05:02,840 No, no, no, no. 115 00:05:02,840 --> 00:05:03,840 So. 116 00:05:03,840 --> 00:05:05,840 No, there's so many squatches. 117 00:05:05,840 --> 00:05:06,840 Yeah. 118 00:05:06,840 --> 00:05:10,840 So for our first one, we're going to head to the great state of West Virginia. 119 00:05:10,840 --> 00:05:13,600 We're going to West Virginia. 120 00:05:13,600 --> 00:05:14,840 Does somebody need meth? 121 00:05:14,840 --> 00:05:17,960 No, it's even better. 122 00:05:17,960 --> 00:05:23,000 So West Virginia is home to some of the greats as far as like, like encrypted history. 123 00:05:23,000 --> 00:05:29,200 You got Mothman, Flatwoods monster, grafted monster and one of today's subjects, Sheep 124 00:05:29,200 --> 00:05:30,200 Squatch. 125 00:05:30,200 --> 00:05:31,200 Sheep Squatch. 126 00:05:31,200 --> 00:05:33,840 Are you guys familiar with the Sheep Squatch? 127 00:05:33,840 --> 00:05:36,080 Yeah, I am not. 128 00:05:36,080 --> 00:05:41,080 I am also not, but I'm mildly concerned. 129 00:05:41,080 --> 00:05:46,640 The origin of Sheep Squatch, just given, you know, the world. 130 00:05:46,640 --> 00:05:50,040 Yeah, I'm not liking where this is going. 131 00:05:50,040 --> 00:05:58,240 This could have been this could have just been an unholy creation due to some, you know, 132 00:05:58,240 --> 00:06:03,080 a lot of meth and the lack of women in abundance of sheep. 133 00:06:03,080 --> 00:06:04,080 Gotcha. 134 00:06:04,080 --> 00:06:10,360 And there's not a lot of cliffs for them to push them up to. 135 00:06:10,360 --> 00:06:11,360 Excellent callback. 136 00:06:11,360 --> 00:06:12,800 Excellent callback. 137 00:06:12,800 --> 00:06:16,720 So so the Sheep Squatch, this thing rules like the name. 138 00:06:16,720 --> 00:06:18,800 Well, it is on the second. 139 00:06:18,800 --> 00:06:21,880 It's on the nose as far as like any name could be. 140 00:06:21,880 --> 00:06:23,480 It doesn't really do it justice. 141 00:06:23,480 --> 00:06:26,200 So this thing is fucking gnarly. 142 00:06:26,200 --> 00:06:30,360 It's about the size of a bear ranging from seven to nine feet tall when standing. 143 00:06:30,360 --> 00:06:33,240 The Sheep Squatch is covered in thick, woolly fur. 144 00:06:33,240 --> 00:06:37,800 Its head is shaped kind of like a goat's head with massive sharp horns that curl around 145 00:06:37,800 --> 00:06:38,800 its head. 146 00:06:38,800 --> 00:06:42,840 Its eyes are often described as glowing red or orange, along with sharp predator like 147 00:06:42,840 --> 00:06:46,440 teeth, often bared in an angered and snarling expression. 148 00:06:46,440 --> 00:06:47,920 So it's basically Baphomet. 149 00:06:47,920 --> 00:06:54,440 Yeah, but like white fluffy and ten feet tall. 150 00:06:54,440 --> 00:06:56,440 It has massive tracks. 151 00:06:56,440 --> 00:07:01,880 Yeah, it has massive and powerful human like arms ending in long clawed hands. 152 00:07:01,880 --> 00:07:06,560 As for its feet, I can neither confirm them as being big, but some accounts describe them 153 00:07:06,560 --> 00:07:10,200 as goat like with hooves, while other described them more ape like. 154 00:07:10,200 --> 00:07:14,200 But to be fair, if I saw this motherfucker coming at me from the pucker brush, I'm not 155 00:07:14,200 --> 00:07:15,200 looking at its feet. 156 00:07:15,200 --> 00:07:18,680 So the fact that it's up in the air, whether or not he's has human feet or not, like I'm 157 00:07:18,680 --> 00:07:19,680 OK with not knowing. 158 00:07:19,680 --> 00:07:20,680 I get it. 159 00:07:20,680 --> 00:07:21,680 Like this is not. 160 00:07:21,680 --> 00:07:23,520 Wait, did you just say pucker brush? 161 00:07:23,520 --> 00:07:25,200 Yeah, the fuck a pucker brush, Brad. 162 00:07:25,200 --> 00:07:26,200 No, not pucker. 163 00:07:26,200 --> 00:07:27,200 Puck. 164 00:07:27,200 --> 00:07:28,200 Pucker brush. 165 00:07:28,200 --> 00:07:29,200 I thought you were saying pucker brush. 166 00:07:29,200 --> 00:07:31,560 No, like like like like. 167 00:07:31,560 --> 00:07:32,560 Shout out. 168 00:07:32,560 --> 00:07:35,560 Technically, it is pucker, but it's what? 169 00:07:35,560 --> 00:07:36,560 What? 170 00:07:36,560 --> 00:07:37,880 Where did you? 171 00:07:37,880 --> 00:07:38,880 What is that? 172 00:07:38,880 --> 00:07:40,320 Do you not know what pucker brush is? 173 00:07:40,320 --> 00:07:41,320 No. 174 00:07:41,320 --> 00:07:44,200 Why don't we just have you're not from New England, bro? 175 00:07:44,200 --> 00:07:46,400 No, I'm 100 percent from here. 176 00:07:46,400 --> 00:07:49,600 That's why I've never heard that, because it sounds like some main shit. 177 00:07:49,600 --> 00:07:50,600 Google it. 178 00:07:50,600 --> 00:07:51,600 Yeah. 179 00:07:51,600 --> 00:07:52,600 Yeah. 180 00:07:52,600 --> 00:07:53,600 You never you never ended up falling into the pocket brush. 181 00:07:53,600 --> 00:07:54,600 Get all get all thorned up. 182 00:07:54,600 --> 00:07:56,920 They get all banged up from the pucker brush, bud. 183 00:07:56,920 --> 00:07:58,960 No, no, we just have. 184 00:07:58,960 --> 00:08:01,880 It's basically the same thing. 185 00:08:01,880 --> 00:08:02,880 It's just thorns. 186 00:08:02,880 --> 00:08:06,560 Yeah, it's just like scrub brush that's on the side of the road. 187 00:08:06,560 --> 00:08:07,560 I love that. 188 00:08:07,560 --> 00:08:08,560 Did we just? 189 00:08:08,560 --> 00:08:09,560 I don't know. 190 00:08:09,560 --> 00:08:10,560 I'm a fucking pucker brush kid. 191 00:08:10,560 --> 00:08:14,240 How do you not heard of that? 192 00:08:14,240 --> 00:08:16,520 I don't know how you like Daba. 193 00:08:16,520 --> 00:08:18,440 It's like, well, I grew up in a city. 194 00:08:18,440 --> 00:08:24,920 I mean, the most contact I had with brush was like walking through an alley in Quincy Center 195 00:08:24,920 --> 00:08:26,600 to get away from the police. 196 00:08:26,600 --> 00:08:28,880 Oh, you're walking away from the police. 197 00:08:28,880 --> 00:08:29,880 Sure. 198 00:08:29,880 --> 00:08:31,480 We're moving on from Pucker Brush. 199 00:08:31,480 --> 00:08:33,760 We're going to keep this going to get this ball rolling. 200 00:08:33,760 --> 00:08:38,440 Oh, and I almost forgot this thing is also it's really smelly. 201 00:08:38,440 --> 00:08:43,040 Like witnesses say that the sheep squash emits a strong musky stench, most often described 202 00:08:43,040 --> 00:08:45,720 as sulfuric or like the smell of decaying meat. 203 00:08:45,720 --> 00:08:50,120 So all around 10 out of 10 great creature. 204 00:08:50,120 --> 00:08:53,280 You're not doing much to deter me from believing this is just Baphomet. 205 00:08:53,280 --> 00:08:55,420 Yeah, it's kind of anyway. 206 00:08:55,420 --> 00:08:59,360 So the the sheep squash is mostly confined, like I said, to the state of West Virginia, 207 00:08:59,360 --> 00:09:01,000 because of course it is. 208 00:09:01,000 --> 00:09:05,840 It's just a nightmare state all around with the majority sightings taking place in Boone 209 00:09:05,840 --> 00:09:08,520 County and the Coal River Valley. 210 00:09:08,520 --> 00:09:11,100 And just like with any squash, there's a bunch of sightings. 211 00:09:11,100 --> 00:09:15,080 But for the sake of time and not wanting to skimp on any details, I found two of my favorite 212 00:09:15,080 --> 00:09:18,880 sightings and now I will share them with you. 213 00:09:18,880 --> 00:09:24,520 So the first one I got for you happened in 1994 when a group of friends decided to go 214 00:09:24,520 --> 00:09:27,400 on a little camping trip in a remote area of Boone County. 215 00:09:27,400 --> 00:09:31,160 It was late at night and the group was gathered around the fire when they heard a strange 216 00:09:31,160 --> 00:09:34,200 sound coming from the dense woods that surrounded them. 217 00:09:34,200 --> 00:09:40,640 They said it sounded like a mix of heavy breathing and low growling, much like Philip Seymour 218 00:09:40,640 --> 00:09:41,640 Hoffman in the movie Happiness. 219 00:09:41,640 --> 00:09:45,720 I don't know if you've ever seen that movie, but if you get the reference, you'll understand. 220 00:09:45,720 --> 00:09:49,400 Well, you also just described my sex noises. 221 00:09:49,400 --> 00:09:56,120 Which also describes Philip Seymour Hoffman in the movie Happiness. 222 00:09:56,120 --> 00:09:59,320 At first they assumed it was probably just a bear or something and they just went about 223 00:09:59,320 --> 00:10:03,920 their night, slugging back keystone lights while Wild Night by John Kruger Mellencamp 224 00:10:03,920 --> 00:10:05,400 played on a boombox nearby. 225 00:10:05,400 --> 00:10:07,800 Allegedly, I don't know if those are the actual details. 226 00:10:07,800 --> 00:10:08,800 No, it tracks. 227 00:10:08,800 --> 00:10:09,800 Yeah, it's 1994. 228 00:10:09,800 --> 00:10:13,440 What else would they be doing? 229 00:10:13,440 --> 00:10:16,800 But the noises grew closer and they started to get the feeling they were being watched. 230 00:10:16,800 --> 00:10:20,800 One of the campers shine their flashlight into the woods and there it was. 231 00:10:20,800 --> 00:10:21,800 Sheep squad. 232 00:10:21,800 --> 00:10:22,800 Now she's squad. 233 00:10:22,800 --> 00:10:23,800 She's squad. 234 00:10:23,800 --> 00:10:25,600 I can't not say it like that. 235 00:10:25,600 --> 00:10:30,800 Now standing at the edge of the tree, they saw this massive eight foot tall horned monster, 236 00:10:30,800 --> 00:10:34,800 its eyes glowing red from the shine of the light, snarling at the campers, revealing 237 00:10:34,800 --> 00:10:37,880 its rows of sharp animalistic teeth. 238 00:10:37,880 --> 00:10:41,740 Now the creature then started moving towards the camp, emitting a guttural growl that sent 239 00:10:41,740 --> 00:10:44,800 the campers into just absolute panic. 240 00:10:44,800 --> 00:10:45,800 Roar. 241 00:10:45,800 --> 00:10:47,800 They were like, let's get that. 242 00:10:47,800 --> 00:10:53,400 They collectively decided, well, I think it's time to be heading out and abandoned the camp 243 00:10:53,400 --> 00:10:55,480 as fast as they fucking could. 244 00:10:55,480 --> 00:10:59,200 Luckily, they were able to get to their cars and skedaddle right on out of there. 245 00:10:59,200 --> 00:11:04,880 But when they returned the next day to allegedly retrieve their boombox and camping gear, they 246 00:11:04,880 --> 00:11:07,240 found that their tents were shredded. 247 00:11:07,240 --> 00:11:10,920 Their food supplies were scattered around the camp with giant visible claw marks on 248 00:11:10,920 --> 00:11:15,720 the cooler lids and large hoof like prints surrounding the area. 249 00:11:15,720 --> 00:11:18,160 And the meth still was completely gone. 250 00:11:18,160 --> 00:11:20,400 Oh, the meth's always gone. 251 00:11:20,400 --> 00:11:21,400 It's always gone. 252 00:11:21,400 --> 00:11:22,920 You can never have enough meth. 253 00:11:22,920 --> 00:11:28,760 So now the next sheep squash story I have for you isn't like the best story, but I like 254 00:11:28,760 --> 00:11:31,120 it for reasons I can't really put into words why. 255 00:11:31,120 --> 00:11:35,220 I think it's the tension that happens within the story, but we can figure it out after. 256 00:11:35,220 --> 00:11:37,320 So this one is more recent. 257 00:11:37,320 --> 00:11:40,200 It took place in 2015. 258 00:11:40,200 --> 00:11:44,680 Four hunters were camping in an isolation check. 259 00:11:44,680 --> 00:11:49,360 Four campers were camping in an isolated section of forest, also in Boone County. 260 00:11:49,360 --> 00:11:53,200 Around midnight, they hear some rustling in the underbrush or the pucker brush. 261 00:11:53,200 --> 00:11:58,380 And just like in the other story, they chalked it up to just being a raccoon or a deer, two 262 00:11:58,380 --> 00:12:00,640 wildly different animals. 263 00:12:00,640 --> 00:12:06,400 But the noises grew louder and they were soon accompanied by a bizarre high pitched bleeding 264 00:12:06,400 --> 00:12:10,240 that none of them could identify. 265 00:12:10,240 --> 00:12:14,000 There we go. 266 00:12:14,000 --> 00:12:15,200 Remember the curious bunch? 267 00:12:15,200 --> 00:12:18,280 They shown a spotlight into the woods and there it was. 268 00:12:18,280 --> 00:12:19,280 Sheep Squatch. 269 00:12:19,280 --> 00:12:25,600 A hulking goat headed monster with thick white fur and massive clawed hands advancing towards 270 00:12:25,600 --> 00:12:28,080 the campsite with surprising speed. 271 00:12:28,080 --> 00:12:30,440 Just fucking gunning for them. 272 00:12:30,440 --> 00:12:32,880 So this thing's hauling ass. 273 00:12:32,880 --> 00:12:35,600 The hunters only have like maybe a minute to react. 274 00:12:35,600 --> 00:12:39,000 So they're scrambling for their rifles and this thing is just closing in on them. 275 00:12:39,000 --> 00:12:44,080 The Sheep Squatch lets out an ear piercing scream and gets within 20 feet of them when 276 00:12:44,080 --> 00:12:46,680 one of the men was able to get a shot off into the air. 277 00:12:46,680 --> 00:12:48,080 But the creature didn't flinch. 278 00:12:48,080 --> 00:12:53,280 Instead, it just kind of like stopped abruptly, sniffed the air, let out a deep growl and 279 00:12:53,280 --> 00:12:55,440 then just fucked off back into the darkness. 280 00:12:55,440 --> 00:13:01,880 So yeah, the hunters checked the area the next morning and found claw marks on nearby 281 00:13:01,880 --> 00:13:06,520 trees as well as strange tracks resembling a mix of hoof prints and clawed feet. 282 00:13:06,520 --> 00:13:10,200 They also reported the sightings to local cryptid investigators. 283 00:13:10,200 --> 00:13:14,040 And it turns out like this is one of the only like only a few instances where the creature 284 00:13:14,040 --> 00:13:17,040 was said to charge directly at humans. 285 00:13:17,040 --> 00:13:20,160 So that's like reassuring, I guess. 286 00:13:20,160 --> 00:13:25,720 Like I still don't want this thing coming at me. 287 00:13:25,720 --> 00:13:31,560 Just like the fucking the amount of sheer panic that these dudes must have been feeling. 288 00:13:31,560 --> 00:13:37,640 I lost my shit, nine foot tall fucking goat monsters screaming down through the woods 289 00:13:37,640 --> 00:13:38,640 at you like, fuck. 290 00:13:38,640 --> 00:13:39,640 God. 291 00:13:39,640 --> 00:13:42,240 But anyways, there you have it. 292 00:13:42,240 --> 00:13:43,240 Sheep Squatch. 293 00:13:43,240 --> 00:13:45,440 How are we feeling about Sheep Squatch? 294 00:13:45,440 --> 00:13:46,440 I love it. 295 00:13:46,440 --> 00:13:47,440 It's terrifying. 296 00:13:47,440 --> 00:13:48,440 It's not ideal. 297 00:13:48,440 --> 00:13:49,440 I want one though. 298 00:13:49,440 --> 00:13:50,440 I want one here. 299 00:13:50,440 --> 00:13:51,440 I was. 300 00:13:51,440 --> 00:13:56,520 What gets me though is the noises it makes seem like very sheep like. 301 00:13:56,520 --> 00:13:57,840 They're like, oh, cute. 302 00:13:57,840 --> 00:14:01,480 And then when you see it, it's like, oh, to be fair. 303 00:14:01,480 --> 00:14:04,280 The noises we heard were from Sarge. 304 00:14:04,280 --> 00:14:10,520 The noises that were described in the story are a little more terrifying than. 305 00:14:10,520 --> 00:14:13,680 I assumed it was a pretty accurate recreation. 306 00:14:13,680 --> 00:14:21,120 Yeah, it's something like that. 307 00:14:21,120 --> 00:14:26,320 But I told my wife about the two that we were covering today. 308 00:14:26,320 --> 00:14:29,680 She said, which one I think is the best one. 309 00:14:29,680 --> 00:14:33,760 I said, well, if you're going to make a plushie out of either of these, I think Sheep Squatch 310 00:14:33,760 --> 00:14:34,760 would make the best plushie. 311 00:14:34,760 --> 00:14:37,760 Yeah, I want a Sheep Squatch. 312 00:14:37,760 --> 00:14:38,760 Yeah. 313 00:14:38,760 --> 00:14:39,760 But all right. 314 00:14:39,760 --> 00:14:45,080 So now we're going to go ahead and we're going to shift gears moving on. 315 00:14:45,080 --> 00:14:49,720 Now we're going to be headed to the Pacific Northwest, home of the OG Squatch. 316 00:14:49,720 --> 00:14:55,520 Now if you thought the Sheep Squatch was an abomination of God, this next one is way worse. 317 00:14:55,520 --> 00:14:57,080 Oh my God. 318 00:14:57,080 --> 00:14:59,240 They make a Sheep Squash plushie. 319 00:14:59,240 --> 00:15:01,320 Sheep Squatch plushie. 320 00:15:01,320 --> 00:15:02,320 All right. 321 00:15:02,320 --> 00:15:06,040 I'm assuming they do, but we're moving on. 322 00:15:06,040 --> 00:15:07,040 Sorry. 323 00:15:07,040 --> 00:15:08,040 Sheep Squatch is done. 324 00:15:08,040 --> 00:15:09,040 Pay attention. 325 00:15:09,040 --> 00:15:10,040 Look at me. 326 00:15:10,040 --> 00:15:11,040 Look at me. 327 00:15:11,040 --> 00:15:12,040 Look at me. 328 00:15:12,040 --> 00:15:13,040 I need it. 329 00:15:13,040 --> 00:15:14,040 But I need it. 330 00:15:14,040 --> 00:15:15,040 Eyes. 331 00:15:15,040 --> 00:15:16,040 Eyes here. 332 00:15:16,040 --> 00:15:17,040 Sorry, guys. 333 00:15:17,040 --> 00:15:19,640 So now we're going to be talking about Bat Squatch. 334 00:15:19,640 --> 00:15:21,440 You guys familiar with Bat Squatch? 335 00:15:21,440 --> 00:15:22,440 Oh my God. 336 00:15:22,440 --> 00:15:23,440 It fucking flies. 337 00:15:23,440 --> 00:15:24,440 This sounds amazing. 338 00:15:24,440 --> 00:15:28,320 Now, again, the name doesn't do it justice. 339 00:15:28,320 --> 00:15:32,560 Like the Bat Squatch sounds like if Sasquatch watched his parents get done, like gunned 340 00:15:32,560 --> 00:15:34,000 down outside of a theater as a kid. 341 00:15:34,000 --> 00:15:37,800 And now he's like excited to be. 342 00:15:37,800 --> 00:15:40,640 But I assure you, it is not that. 343 00:15:40,640 --> 00:15:42,060 And I fucking hate this thing. 344 00:15:42,060 --> 00:15:47,920 So standing between seven and nine feet tall, this thing is built like a brick shithouse. 345 00:15:47,920 --> 00:15:49,200 It is jacked as fuck. 346 00:15:49,200 --> 00:15:51,360 Just like an absolute unit, dude. 347 00:15:51,360 --> 00:15:56,540 Its head and face resembled that of a bat with a flattened snout, sharp teeth and glowing 348 00:15:56,540 --> 00:15:59,000 eyes that are said to pierce through the darkness. 349 00:15:59,000 --> 00:16:04,140 Its coarse and matted fur is described as being bluish, purple, almost black in color. 350 00:16:04,140 --> 00:16:08,880 Its hands are massive with sharp claws and its feet are talon like, which he uses to 351 00:16:08,880 --> 00:16:14,920 grip its prey when he's flying around on his massive leathery bat wings that have a wingspan 352 00:16:14,920 --> 00:16:16,720 of up to 50 feet. 353 00:16:16,720 --> 00:16:21,640 So yeah, this thing is a fucking nightmare. 354 00:16:21,640 --> 00:16:22,640 Come on. 355 00:16:22,640 --> 00:16:24,880 I hate it, but I also love it so much. 356 00:16:24,880 --> 00:16:28,440 It sounds perfect for like a heavy metal album. 357 00:16:28,440 --> 00:16:29,560 Yeah, right. 358 00:16:29,560 --> 00:16:32,880 So just like with Sheep Squash, I've had a bunch of stories, but I found the best two 359 00:16:32,880 --> 00:16:33,960 that I liked. 360 00:16:33,960 --> 00:16:38,660 But before we begin, I think it's important to note that almost all the bat squatch sightings 361 00:16:38,660 --> 00:16:46,120 that have come out, they all take place near Mount St. Helens, specifically after its eruption 362 00:16:46,120 --> 00:16:48,480 in May of 1980. 363 00:16:48,480 --> 00:16:52,680 People started reporting sightings of the beast not too long after that happened. 364 00:16:52,680 --> 00:16:57,800 Now the eruption of Mount St. Helens drastically altered the landscape in the area. 365 00:16:57,800 --> 00:17:01,760 When this thing popped off, the entire north face of the mountain slid away, causing the 366 00:17:01,760 --> 00:17:04,280 largest landslide ever recorded. 367 00:17:04,280 --> 00:17:08,560 And not in human history, but in the history of the fucking earth. 368 00:17:08,560 --> 00:17:14,540 The landslide traveled at speeds of up to 150 miles an hour, covering 24 square miles 369 00:17:14,540 --> 00:17:19,880 in debris, with some parts of it being close to 600 feet deep when it was all settled. 370 00:17:19,880 --> 00:17:20,880 Fuck. 371 00:17:20,880 --> 00:17:27,760 So I'm not only telling you this because some cryptid enthusiasts believe that the reason 372 00:17:27,760 --> 00:17:32,080 bat squatch was seen so frequently in the area after the eruption was because this may 373 00:17:32,080 --> 00:17:36,880 have opened up a cavern or some sort of lair where the bat squatch lived, forcing it to 374 00:17:36,880 --> 00:17:38,800 come out into the open. 375 00:17:38,800 --> 00:17:44,240 Or on the other hand, his home was destroyed due to the event and he's now displaced. 376 00:17:44,240 --> 00:17:47,240 Either or, they both sound like reasonable explanations to me. 377 00:17:47,240 --> 00:17:48,240 So yeah, totally reasonable. 378 00:17:48,240 --> 00:17:50,160 Either way, bat squatch is pissed. 379 00:17:50,160 --> 00:17:51,280 It was a portal. 380 00:17:51,280 --> 00:17:52,280 He's not stoked. 381 00:17:52,280 --> 00:17:58,160 So, all right, so that out of the way, let's dive into some stories, shall we? 382 00:17:58,160 --> 00:18:02,480 All right, so this sighting occurred in April of 1994. 383 00:18:02,480 --> 00:18:08,200 A pilot whose name I do not know was flying a small private aircraft around Mount St. 384 00:18:08,200 --> 00:18:09,200 Helens. 385 00:18:09,200 --> 00:18:13,160 It was a relatively clear day, nice day, dude just taking in the views when he notices something 386 00:18:13,160 --> 00:18:16,300 outside his plane flying at a high altitude. 387 00:18:16,300 --> 00:18:21,360 He described what he saw as a massive creature that was dark in color and having an estimated 388 00:18:21,360 --> 00:18:23,800 wingspan of between 30 and 50 feet. 389 00:18:23,800 --> 00:18:28,800 It had a bat-like head with pointed ears and sharp features and his body was more primate 390 00:18:28,800 --> 00:18:29,960 than bird. 391 00:18:29,960 --> 00:18:34,840 The pilot noted that the creature appeared to be gliding effortlessly through the sky, 392 00:18:34,840 --> 00:18:36,640 maintaining a steady pace. 393 00:18:36,640 --> 00:18:40,020 Every once in a while, it would flap its wings and it would propel it forward in a way that 394 00:18:40,020 --> 00:18:42,440 seemed deliberate and controlled. 395 00:18:42,440 --> 00:18:46,920 At one point during the sighting, the bat-squatch allegedly flew close enough to the plane that 396 00:18:46,920 --> 00:18:52,160 the pilot could observe its details more clearly and then the creature banked sharply and disappeared 397 00:18:52,160 --> 00:18:55,780 in some clouds heading towards the slopes of the volcano. 398 00:18:55,780 --> 00:19:01,280 The pilot was obviously shocked and like unsure, like what did I just see? 399 00:19:01,280 --> 00:19:06,320 He eventually, or they eventually told their story to a few colleagues, encrypted researchers 400 00:19:06,320 --> 00:19:10,820 describing it as unlike anything they had encountered in their flying career. 401 00:19:10,820 --> 00:19:15,360 The sighting was never officially reported to any aviation authorities, probably out 402 00:19:15,360 --> 00:19:16,760 of fear of ridicule or professionalism. 403 00:19:16,760 --> 00:19:18,560 Kind of a hard story to tell people. 404 00:19:18,560 --> 00:19:23,240 Yeah, I mean, the FAA will probably be like, all right, bud, so let's- 405 00:19:23,240 --> 00:19:25,240 All right, we're drug testing everybody. 406 00:19:25,240 --> 00:19:28,720 Can you describe this for me again? 407 00:19:28,720 --> 00:19:31,840 Yes, have you seen the Wizard of Oz? 408 00:19:31,840 --> 00:19:39,040 Yeah, it's like if the flying monkeys are on steroids, it's not ideal. 409 00:19:39,040 --> 00:19:41,560 This license would have been taken away almost immediately. 410 00:19:41,560 --> 00:19:42,560 Immediately. 411 00:19:42,560 --> 00:19:43,560 Oh, definitely. 412 00:19:43,560 --> 00:19:44,560 Without question. 413 00:19:44,560 --> 00:19:47,560 Especially in 1994, they're like, all right, bud, that's- 414 00:19:47,560 --> 00:19:49,760 All right, settle down. 415 00:19:49,760 --> 00:19:50,760 Settle down. 416 00:19:50,760 --> 00:19:56,480 Now, for our next sighting, this one is a bit unusual because it takes place 430 miles 417 00:19:56,480 --> 00:20:00,680 away from the bat-squatch's normal haunting grounds of Mount St. Helens. 418 00:20:00,680 --> 00:20:03,760 This sighting took place near Mount Shasta in California. 419 00:20:03,760 --> 00:20:08,120 The story goes that in 2011, a group of hikers were exploring the lower elevations of the 420 00:20:08,120 --> 00:20:09,120 mountains. 421 00:20:09,120 --> 00:20:16,280 Oh, and apparently these guys were super experienced outdoors people, so this story kind of has 422 00:20:16,280 --> 00:20:18,680 some credibility to it. 423 00:20:18,680 --> 00:20:21,720 They were familiar with the local wildlife, the terrain. 424 00:20:21,720 --> 00:20:27,560 Anyway, the group was near a wooded trail when they noticed that the surrounding forest 425 00:20:27,560 --> 00:20:32,560 got suddenly and unusually quiet as if a predator was lurking nearby. 426 00:20:32,560 --> 00:20:36,880 The hikers then described seeing a massive winged humanoid emerge from out of the tree 427 00:20:36,880 --> 00:20:37,880 line. 428 00:20:37,880 --> 00:20:41,440 The creature was said to be over seven feet tall with a muscular build similar to an ape 429 00:20:41,440 --> 00:20:42,920 or a large primate. 430 00:20:42,920 --> 00:20:46,720 It had leathery bat-like wings that stretched to an estimated 15 to 20 feet. 431 00:20:46,720 --> 00:20:49,240 So it's like a little smaller of a bat-squatch than the other one. 432 00:20:49,240 --> 00:20:52,720 The other one was like nine feet tall, maybe it was like a juvenile, teen. 433 00:20:52,720 --> 00:20:53,720 Yeah, teenage. 434 00:20:53,720 --> 00:20:56,640 Yeah, a baby, a baby-squatch. 435 00:20:56,640 --> 00:20:57,640 Its body was covered in- 436 00:20:57,640 --> 00:20:58,640 Hours of teenage. 437 00:20:58,640 --> 00:20:59,640 I couldn't help it. 438 00:20:59,640 --> 00:21:02,640 It came to my head right away. 439 00:21:02,640 --> 00:21:06,120 I'm just a teenage cryptid baby. 440 00:21:06,120 --> 00:21:11,040 Its body was covered in dark bluish fur and its face was described as a mix of bat and 441 00:21:11,040 --> 00:21:14,760 wolf-like features, which is actually pretty common for the bat-squatch sightings. 442 00:21:14,760 --> 00:21:19,160 I didn't mention that, but I mean, either way, it's a nightmare. 443 00:21:19,160 --> 00:21:20,160 There's a lot going on. 444 00:21:20,160 --> 00:21:21,160 I understand. 445 00:21:21,160 --> 00:21:22,160 Yeah. 446 00:21:22,160 --> 00:21:24,360 It also had yellow glowing eyes. 447 00:21:24,360 --> 00:21:28,440 The bat-squatch reportedly perched briefly on a large rock, folding its wings as it just 448 00:21:28,440 --> 00:21:30,440 stared at the hikers. 449 00:21:30,440 --> 00:21:36,400 After what could only be described as a tense standoff, the creature let out a deep guttural 450 00:21:36,400 --> 00:21:41,160 growl that echoed through the forest and then spread its wings and launched itself into 451 00:21:41,160 --> 00:21:44,160 the air with a powerful leap disappearing over the trees. 452 00:21:44,160 --> 00:21:49,000 Now the hikers, full of shock and fear and void of anything left in their bladder and 453 00:21:49,000 --> 00:21:52,920 bowels got the hell out of there and back to their campsite to process what they had 454 00:21:52,920 --> 00:21:53,920 just seen. 455 00:21:53,920 --> 00:21:58,000 Some of them later shared their experiences online, sparking discussion and discourse 456 00:21:58,000 --> 00:21:59,960 between a bunch of nerds. 457 00:21:59,960 --> 00:22:05,220 They were definitely certain it wasn't a bird or known animal. 458 00:22:05,220 --> 00:22:10,440 They admitted to feeling uneasy about the encounter describing the creature as something 459 00:22:10,440 --> 00:22:12,600 quote, not of this world. 460 00:22:12,600 --> 00:22:18,560 So this sighting got a bunch of people wondering why the bat-squatch would be this far south. 461 00:22:18,560 --> 00:22:23,200 Again, normally it's up by Mount St. Helens. 462 00:22:23,200 --> 00:22:27,460 It's possible that the bat-squatch territory extends beyond the Pacific Northwest, perhaps 463 00:22:27,460 --> 00:22:34,040 covering the entire Cascade Range, which includes both Mount St. Helens and Mount Shasta. 464 00:22:34,040 --> 00:22:38,040 Or perhaps it's migrating or searching for resources to survive, who knows? 465 00:22:38,040 --> 00:22:42,920 Maybe it gets cold in Oregon or wherever, fuck so, Washington. 466 00:22:42,920 --> 00:22:47,040 So yeah, could be just trying to get a little warm. 467 00:22:47,040 --> 00:22:52,000 When you're nine feet tall, maybe you just need better access to street tacos. 468 00:22:52,000 --> 00:22:55,200 But there you have it guys. 469 00:22:55,200 --> 00:22:56,200 Yeah, that follows. 470 00:22:56,200 --> 00:22:59,160 Yeah, a little two for one special for you guys. 471 00:22:59,160 --> 00:23:00,160 So that's the end of the stories. 472 00:23:00,160 --> 00:23:04,000 We've got a little bit more we can do after this, but I just want to know, I want to get 473 00:23:04,000 --> 00:23:05,000 your thoughts. 474 00:23:05,000 --> 00:23:06,000 Matt, let's start with you. 475 00:23:06,000 --> 00:23:10,880 How you feeling about sheep-squatch, bat-squatch, questions, concerns, comments? 476 00:23:10,880 --> 00:23:13,480 I mean, sheep-squatch, all right. 477 00:23:13,480 --> 00:23:15,920 Bat-squatch, badass. 478 00:23:15,920 --> 00:23:22,320 That just seems like it should be like a cheesy tattoo on your back, just like spread wings. 479 00:23:22,320 --> 00:23:25,280 They're like the best 90s metal. 480 00:23:25,280 --> 00:23:29,200 I saw a bat-squatch bat 94 up to St. Helens. 481 00:23:29,200 --> 00:23:32,200 I mean, they opened for Slayer. 482 00:23:32,200 --> 00:23:37,560 I feel like now that has to be a merch where it's like a bat-squatch band t-shirt. 483 00:23:37,560 --> 00:23:38,560 It's like on the back. 484 00:23:38,560 --> 00:23:45,720 It's like the tour dates and it's all just Mount St. Helens every day. 485 00:23:45,720 --> 00:23:48,760 And then the last date is just Mount Shasta. 486 00:23:48,760 --> 00:23:52,840 Yeah, I fuck with that. 487 00:23:52,840 --> 00:23:53,840 Sarge, how you feeling? 488 00:23:53,840 --> 00:23:55,060 What are you thinking? 489 00:23:55,060 --> 00:24:02,240 I feel like sheep-squatch is like if like your high school mascot was a ram and like 490 00:24:02,240 --> 00:24:04,680 one of the kids just wanted to make it look cool. 491 00:24:04,680 --> 00:24:07,680 So we drew sheep-squatch. 492 00:24:07,680 --> 00:24:08,680 You know what I mean? 493 00:24:08,680 --> 00:24:10,680 Like the back of a math book. 494 00:24:10,680 --> 00:24:11,920 Yeah, exactly. 495 00:24:11,920 --> 00:24:15,320 Like that thank you for voting sticker that the kid in like Wisconsin made or whatever 496 00:24:15,320 --> 00:24:19,360 was just a jacked werewolf ripping its shirt off. 497 00:24:19,360 --> 00:24:20,360 Exactly. 498 00:24:20,360 --> 00:24:21,360 Exactly. 499 00:24:21,360 --> 00:24:22,360 Yeah. 500 00:24:22,360 --> 00:24:23,360 You didn't see that? 501 00:24:23,360 --> 00:24:25,160 It was like Wisconsin or Michigan or something like that. 502 00:24:25,160 --> 00:24:33,040 They had like a contest and like middle schoolers or whatever got to draw the I voted stickers 503 00:24:33,040 --> 00:24:34,280 for the state. 504 00:24:34,280 --> 00:24:38,920 And the one that won was just this jacked werewolf ripping his shirt off that says I 505 00:24:38,920 --> 00:24:39,920 voted. 506 00:24:39,920 --> 00:24:40,920 Amazing. 507 00:24:40,920 --> 00:24:41,920 Amazing. 508 00:24:41,920 --> 00:24:43,480 I think that's highly appropriate. 509 00:24:43,480 --> 00:24:47,560 That's celebrating, you know, this freedom. 510 00:24:47,560 --> 00:24:49,760 Nothing says freedom like a jacked werewolf. 511 00:24:49,760 --> 00:24:53,560 Geez, I just got like a nice little moose one. 512 00:24:53,560 --> 00:24:55,360 All right. 513 00:24:55,360 --> 00:24:57,560 I'm getting robbed. 514 00:24:57,560 --> 00:24:59,040 We don't have anything cool like that. 515 00:24:59,040 --> 00:25:01,040 Yeah, I didn't get anything cool like that either. 516 00:25:01,040 --> 00:25:07,880 Mine just mine just said I voted but in Spanish. 517 00:25:07,880 --> 00:25:14,200 So I did a little something fun for the end of this episode. 518 00:25:14,200 --> 00:25:21,840 So I took the weights, the characteristics, everything I could find out about bat squash 519 00:25:21,840 --> 00:25:23,600 and sheep squash. 520 00:25:23,600 --> 00:25:26,000 And I fed it into an AI algorithm. 521 00:25:26,000 --> 00:25:27,000 Oh, yeah. 522 00:25:27,000 --> 00:25:33,320 To find out who would win in a fight between sheep squash and bat squash. 523 00:25:33,320 --> 00:25:36,200 And I had to do I had to break it down scene by scene. 524 00:25:36,200 --> 00:25:38,160 So are you ready? 525 00:25:38,160 --> 00:25:39,720 Can we can we place bets? 526 00:25:39,720 --> 00:25:41,000 Can we call who's going to win? 527 00:25:41,000 --> 00:25:43,360 I would say my money's on bat squash, dude. 528 00:25:43,360 --> 00:25:44,360 Yeah. 529 00:25:44,360 --> 00:25:45,360 All right. 530 00:25:45,360 --> 00:25:46,360 The wings alone. 531 00:25:46,360 --> 00:25:47,560 I mean, 50 feet, just one boom. 532 00:25:47,560 --> 00:25:49,080 There goes sheep squash off the cliff. 533 00:25:49,080 --> 00:25:51,160 That and also bat squash can fly. 534 00:25:51,160 --> 00:25:55,080 So it would easily be able to like get up and fly away. 535 00:25:55,080 --> 00:25:57,680 So sheep squash is really at a disadvantage here. 536 00:25:57,680 --> 00:25:58,680 That's true. 537 00:25:58,680 --> 00:26:02,440 But also, I mean, if you think back to like a celebrity death match, whenever they do the 538 00:26:02,440 --> 00:26:05,240 matchups, you're like, oh, that person is definitely going to win. 539 00:26:05,240 --> 00:26:06,240 There's usually a huge upset. 540 00:26:06,240 --> 00:26:07,240 You know what I mean? 541 00:26:07,240 --> 00:26:08,240 Like, so you never know. 542 00:26:08,240 --> 00:26:10,480 I mean, I know who wins, but it's whatever. 543 00:26:10,480 --> 00:26:11,480 All right. 544 00:26:11,480 --> 00:26:12,480 Yeah. 545 00:26:12,480 --> 00:26:13,480 I mean, I'm going to bet my money on. 546 00:26:13,480 --> 00:26:14,480 I can't. 547 00:26:14,480 --> 00:26:15,480 Yeah. 548 00:26:15,480 --> 00:26:16,480 Right. 549 00:26:16,480 --> 00:26:17,480 Well, he knows who wins. 550 00:26:17,480 --> 00:26:18,480 So all right. 551 00:26:18,480 --> 00:26:23,520 So round one, the encounter, this the setting, a remote forest clearing near the Appalachian 552 00:26:23,520 --> 00:26:24,760 Mountains at dusk. 553 00:26:24,760 --> 00:26:26,800 The sheep squash emerges from the shadows. 554 00:26:26,800 --> 00:26:31,440 It's thick, matted first streaked with mud, wreaking of decay from above. 555 00:26:31,440 --> 00:26:36,020 A guttural screech signals the arrival of bat squash wings beating heavily as it descends 556 00:26:36,020 --> 00:26:37,660 to the forest floor. 557 00:26:37,660 --> 00:26:41,840 The two creatures, the two creatures circle one another. 558 00:26:41,840 --> 00:26:51,160 Bat Squatch hissing and flaring its wings while she squatch bellows a deafening roar. 559 00:26:51,160 --> 00:26:55,280 With its aerial capabilities, Bat Squatch launches the first attack, swooping down with 560 00:26:55,280 --> 00:26:58,700 razor sharp claws aimed at sheep squash thick neck. 561 00:26:58,700 --> 00:27:02,680 The claws rake across the fur, but fail to penetrate deeply due to she squatches dense 562 00:27:02,680 --> 00:27:03,680 coat. 563 00:27:03,680 --> 00:27:07,680 Shaking my sex tape, shaking off the blow, she squatch charges forward. 564 00:27:07,680 --> 00:27:11,120 It's powerful horns aimed at bat squatches midsection. 565 00:27:11,120 --> 00:27:15,520 The impact sends the flying beast tumbling into the dirt momentarily stunned. 566 00:27:15,520 --> 00:27:19,540 Recovering quickly, bat squash uses its muscular arms to grapple with sheep squash, relying 567 00:27:19,540 --> 00:27:21,540 on its strength and sharp claws. 568 00:27:21,540 --> 00:27:25,920 It goes for sheep squatches vulnerable underbelly, slashing at exposed skin. 569 00:27:25,920 --> 00:27:30,280 Roaring in fury, sheep squash bites down with its powerful jaws, sinking its teeth into bat 570 00:27:30,280 --> 00:27:31,460 squatches arms. 571 00:27:31,460 --> 00:27:34,640 The bite is brutal, but fails to incapacitate the wing cryptid. 572 00:27:34,640 --> 00:27:38,680 The bat squash takes flight, wrenching itself free from sheep squatches bite. 573 00:27:38,680 --> 00:27:42,240 The circles overhead, looking for an opening, with its immense wingspan it dives at full 574 00:27:42,240 --> 00:27:45,760 speed slamming into sheep squash and knocking it off balance. 575 00:27:45,760 --> 00:27:49,560 Sheep Squatch rises quickly, seemingly unfazed by the aerial assault. 576 00:27:49,560 --> 00:27:57,880 Using its brute strength, it uproots a tree and hurls it up bat squash, clipping one wing 577 00:27:57,880 --> 00:28:00,320 and forcing it to land. 578 00:28:00,320 --> 00:28:04,400 Despite its injured wing, bat squash uses its agility and strength to dart behind sheep 579 00:28:04,400 --> 00:28:08,800 squash, delivering a series of slashes to the back of its legs, causing it to stumble. 580 00:28:08,800 --> 00:28:15,520 With a screech, bat squash clamps its powerful jaws around sheep squatch's throat, choking 581 00:28:15,520 --> 00:28:16,760 off its roar. 582 00:28:16,760 --> 00:28:20,680 Thrashing wildly, sheep squash uses its horns to gore bat squash's side, but the damage 583 00:28:20,680 --> 00:28:21,680 isn't enough. 584 00:28:21,680 --> 00:28:27,360 Slowly, sheep squatch's movement weaken as bat squash tightens its grip. 585 00:28:27,360 --> 00:28:29,760 The winner is bat squash. 586 00:28:29,760 --> 00:28:32,200 Bat Squatch is common in the material prowess. 587 00:28:32,200 --> 00:28:36,040 Predatory agility and sharp claws secure its victory, while sheep squatch's brute strength 588 00:28:36,040 --> 00:28:38,200 and stamina make it a formidable foe. 589 00:28:38,200 --> 00:28:45,200 Its lack of speed and adaptability ultimately leave it vulnerable to bat squash's relentless 590 00:28:45,200 --> 00:28:46,200 assault. 591 00:28:46,200 --> 00:28:47,200 So you guys were right. 592 00:28:47,200 --> 00:28:51,000 It's also got crippling methodiction too, so that'll slow it down. 593 00:28:51,000 --> 00:28:53,800 Yeah, so bat squash is the winner there. 594 00:28:53,800 --> 00:28:56,560 All right, that's all I got for you guys. 595 00:28:56,560 --> 00:28:57,560 That was it. 596 00:28:57,560 --> 00:28:58,880 That was enough. 597 00:28:58,880 --> 00:28:59,880 That was enough. 598 00:28:59,880 --> 00:29:00,880 I needed that. 599 00:29:00,880 --> 00:29:01,880 That was intense. 600 00:29:01,880 --> 00:29:04,200 I would make a good internet short film. 601 00:29:04,200 --> 00:29:05,200 Right? 602 00:29:05,200 --> 00:29:07,280 Or a decent comic or something. 603 00:29:07,280 --> 00:29:08,280 Oh, definitely. 604 00:29:08,280 --> 00:29:09,280 Like, Cryptid Battles? 605 00:29:09,280 --> 00:29:10,280 Yeah, something. 606 00:29:10,280 --> 00:29:11,280 Yeah. 607 00:29:11,280 --> 00:29:12,280 Do you ever back on Newgrounds? 608 00:29:12,280 --> 00:29:17,240 They used to have Master Chief versus Superman and all those little weird animations. 609 00:29:17,240 --> 00:29:18,880 I feel a lot like that. 610 00:29:18,880 --> 00:29:22,080 Yeah, it would make a good Flash animation, something like that. 611 00:29:22,080 --> 00:29:23,200 Oh, definitely. 612 00:29:23,200 --> 00:29:25,360 The ultimate showdown of ultimate destiny. 613 00:29:25,360 --> 00:29:29,080 All right, well, that's the episode. 614 00:29:29,080 --> 00:29:30,080 Thank you so much for listening, everyone. 615 00:29:30,080 --> 00:29:32,080 Thank you to Matt for coming on. 616 00:29:32,080 --> 00:29:34,920 Thank you to Sarge for always being here. 617 00:29:34,920 --> 00:29:38,040 Before we go, Sarge, do you have anything you want to plug into the audience? 618 00:29:38,040 --> 00:29:41,000 Yeah, get the coloring book. 619 00:29:41,000 --> 00:29:47,640 The horrible crisis of all of our existence in the United States has been prolonged. 620 00:29:47,640 --> 00:29:50,200 So the coloring book is just going to stay up. 621 00:29:50,200 --> 00:29:54,760 Sarge's supernormal.com, spelled like it sounds. 622 00:29:54,760 --> 00:29:56,680 You can get my coloring book on Amazon. 623 00:29:56,680 --> 00:29:57,680 It's $9.99. 624 00:29:57,680 --> 00:30:06,520 You can use it to lighten the mood or to burn and possibly make hot dogs. 625 00:30:06,520 --> 00:30:07,520 I don't know. 626 00:30:07,520 --> 00:30:12,200 Well, hey, you could put the pages in the top of a bottle and make a maltov and maltov 627 00:30:12,200 --> 00:30:13,200 cocktail. 628 00:30:13,200 --> 00:30:14,200 Yeah. 629 00:30:14,200 --> 00:30:16,240 Deliver it to a CEO's house. 630 00:30:16,240 --> 00:30:18,000 Yeah, that's an idea. 631 00:30:18,000 --> 00:30:19,000 Yeah. 632 00:30:19,000 --> 00:30:21,600 Probably shouldn't put that on the Internet. 633 00:30:21,600 --> 00:30:23,560 We can don't that. 634 00:30:23,560 --> 00:30:27,800 I, you know, based on based on the direction the Internet's headed, I think they're kind 635 00:30:27,800 --> 00:30:28,800 of down for that idea. 636 00:30:28,800 --> 00:30:31,160 Yeah, no, I mean, I'm fine with it. 637 00:30:31,160 --> 00:30:36,440 I'm a big fan of all of the like really popular online detectives when the news reaches out 638 00:30:36,440 --> 00:30:37,440 to them. 639 00:30:37,440 --> 00:30:38,440 So what are you guys doing to find this guy? 640 00:30:38,440 --> 00:30:41,600 And they're like, I'm not doing it. 641 00:30:41,600 --> 00:30:44,120 He's got a beautiful smile and he's very charismatic. 642 00:30:44,120 --> 00:30:46,120 So no, we're not going to find him. 643 00:30:46,120 --> 00:30:48,120 I'm not narking on John Wick. 644 00:30:48,120 --> 00:30:49,120 Yeah, right. 645 00:30:49,120 --> 00:30:53,680 Dude, as soon as that dude went into Central Central Park, the cops are just like, I will 646 00:30:53,680 --> 00:30:54,680 never find him. 647 00:30:54,680 --> 00:30:55,680 Yeah, he's fine. 648 00:30:55,680 --> 00:30:58,680 You know how big Central Park is? 649 00:30:58,680 --> 00:31:00,160 Can't be just walking around all. 650 00:31:00,160 --> 00:31:03,160 That's why you picked him up and flew him out. 651 00:31:03,160 --> 00:31:04,160 Yeah. 652 00:31:04,160 --> 00:31:05,160 All right. 653 00:31:05,160 --> 00:31:11,120 Matthew, is there anything you want to plug or bring awareness to or? 654 00:31:11,120 --> 00:31:14,920 I mean, you can find me on Instagram at bulk detonator. 655 00:31:14,920 --> 00:31:17,160 I want to give a shout out to Pat. 656 00:31:17,160 --> 00:31:20,000 His burgers are the damn best. 657 00:31:20,000 --> 00:31:21,800 You can find him at Patch Burger. 658 00:31:21,800 --> 00:31:22,800 Hell yeah. 659 00:31:22,800 --> 00:31:28,380 And then one of my best friends, she's there, a musician, an artist and everything. 660 00:31:28,380 --> 00:31:30,120 You can find them at Lucia. 661 00:31:30,120 --> 00:31:33,440 That's L-U-C-I-A dot arts and music. 662 00:31:33,440 --> 00:31:35,220 And that's on Instagram. 663 00:31:35,220 --> 00:31:36,320 Check out her album. 664 00:31:36,320 --> 00:31:37,320 There are everything. 665 00:31:37,320 --> 00:31:38,320 It's fantastic. 666 00:31:38,320 --> 00:31:39,320 Hell yeah. 667 00:31:39,320 --> 00:31:41,280 And I'll be sure to put a link to all those. 668 00:31:41,280 --> 00:31:42,280 I don't. 669 00:31:42,280 --> 00:31:43,880 Yeah, I don't sell anything. 670 00:31:43,880 --> 00:31:47,720 I'm just you just blow shit up, which is awesome, too. 671 00:31:47,720 --> 00:31:48,720 Yeah. 672 00:31:48,720 --> 00:31:49,720 Yeah. 673 00:31:49,720 --> 00:31:50,720 Like this is this. 674 00:31:50,720 --> 00:31:51,720 It's just me. 675 00:31:51,720 --> 00:31:52,720 That's what my page is. 676 00:31:52,720 --> 00:31:56,680 And just the various things that happened in my life, the various things you explode 677 00:31:56,680 --> 00:31:57,680 for fun. 678 00:31:57,680 --> 00:31:58,680 Yeah. 679 00:31:58,680 --> 00:31:59,680 Yeah. 680 00:31:59,680 --> 00:32:00,680 Sometimes explosions. 681 00:32:00,680 --> 00:32:01,680 Sometimes it's nails. 682 00:32:01,680 --> 00:32:02,680 Sometimes it's cats. 683 00:32:02,680 --> 00:32:03,680 All things that are. 684 00:32:03,680 --> 00:32:04,680 But you don't blow up cats. 685 00:32:04,680 --> 00:32:06,160 Let's we want to be clear about that. 686 00:32:06,160 --> 00:32:08,000 No cats were hurt. 687 00:32:08,000 --> 00:32:09,880 We're hurt in the filming of the explosions. 688 00:32:09,880 --> 00:32:13,680 No, the cats just hurt me. 689 00:32:13,680 --> 00:32:16,840 Emotionally and physically, because they could be fucking straight up assholes. 690 00:32:16,840 --> 00:32:17,840 They are bastards. 691 00:32:17,840 --> 00:32:18,840 Oh, yeah. 692 00:32:18,840 --> 00:32:19,840 All right. 693 00:32:19,840 --> 00:32:22,680 If you want to follow us on Instagram, it's at Crypto Cocktail. 694 00:32:22,680 --> 00:32:24,840 Follow us on TikTok Crypto Cocktail Party. 695 00:32:24,840 --> 00:32:27,840 Please leave a rating and review either on Spotify or Apple. 696 00:32:27,840 --> 00:32:31,840 They both, you know, helps us so much and make your friends listen to the show. 697 00:32:31,840 --> 00:32:33,560 Even if even if they don't like the show. 698 00:32:33,560 --> 00:32:34,560 Yeah. 699 00:32:34,560 --> 00:32:36,480 Tell them to give us a good rating and review anyways. 700 00:32:36,480 --> 00:32:38,280 You know, fucking tell them to listen. 701 00:32:38,280 --> 00:32:39,280 That's just forcing. 702 00:32:39,280 --> 00:32:40,280 No. 703 00:32:40,280 --> 00:32:41,280 Yeah. 704 00:32:41,280 --> 00:32:42,760 I'm forcing everybody to listen to this episode. 705 00:32:42,760 --> 00:32:47,120 And also drink Narragansett beer because it's better than anything else that's out there 706 00:32:47,120 --> 00:32:49,280 and in the form of domestic beer. 707 00:32:49,280 --> 00:32:50,280 That's fair. 708 00:32:50,280 --> 00:32:51,280 Bro. 709 00:32:51,280 --> 00:32:52,480 Bro, come on. 710 00:32:52,480 --> 00:32:54,760 No one's in Amesbury. 711 00:32:54,760 --> 00:32:56,800 Let's be honest. 712 00:32:56,800 --> 00:32:57,800 All right. 713 00:32:57,800 --> 00:33:00,800 There's come on. 714 00:33:00,800 --> 00:33:02,400 There's dozens of us. 715 00:33:02,400 --> 00:33:10,480 I was going to say, if you're in Eastern New York, as someone who grew up not too far from 716 00:33:10,480 --> 00:33:12,480 Amesbury, there's not much there. 717 00:33:12,480 --> 00:33:14,000 Except for Matt. 718 00:33:14,000 --> 00:33:15,000 I'm here. 719 00:33:15,000 --> 00:33:16,000 Come hang out with me. 720 00:33:16,000 --> 00:33:17,000 That's how it matters. 721 00:33:17,000 --> 00:33:18,000 Exactly. 722 00:33:18,000 --> 00:33:19,000 All right. 723 00:33:19,000 --> 00:33:20,000 Thanks for listening. 724 00:33:20,000 --> 00:33:23,440 And with that out of the way, usually Sarge says goodbye and I love you to the audience. 725 00:33:23,440 --> 00:33:27,480 But Matthew, I think it's I think you should say goodbye and I love you to the audience. 726 00:33:27,480 --> 00:33:28,480 Sure. 727 00:33:28,480 --> 00:33:29,480 Goodbye. 728 00:33:29,480 --> 00:33:30,480 I love you. 729 00:33:30,480 --> 00:33:42,480 Take care of yourself.