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Hey everybody, welcome back to another episode of Cryptic Cocktail Party, a show where we

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have a few drinks, share a few laughs, take a dive into the unknown.

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I said laugh just then instead of laughs, but whatever.

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My name is David.

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Today I'm joined by a good friend of the show and host of the Cool Parents podcast.

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Justin Furtak, what's going on buddy?

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Not too much.

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Yeah.

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You look good.

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Too much.

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Thank you.

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Yeah.

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It feels like deja vu.

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Yeah.

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We had some technical difficulties.

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It was whatever.

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Dude, fucking it happens.

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It's fine.

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Yeah.

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How you doing?

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I'm all right.

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I'm okay.

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How are you?

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I'm all right.

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I got a new candle.

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I'm not a candle guy, but I got a new candle.

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You got to be a candle guy.

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Dude, it's actually called Cerelean Aloe and it's hands down one of the best things.

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I didn't realize it like de-stresses me, I guess.

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Yeah.

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I don't know.

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Is that something candles?

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I don't know fucking shit about candles.

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I feel like candles to me are like crystals.

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I don't think they really do anything like the properties of a candle like, oh, it's

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soothing and relaxing.

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I don't know.

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Am I wrong for this?

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No, you ever hear of aromatherapy?

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Yeah, but I don't think that's anything.

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That's not a thing.

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Oh, it is.

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Is it?

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Oh, this is science.

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There's a science to it.

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There's no science to that.

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And I refuse to believe there is.

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Okay.

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Well, show me some papers in the New England Journal of Medicine and then I'll.

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I mean, no, like you can use smell as like a grounding technique.

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You know what I mean?

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It works like in more time behind that.

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I don't.

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Huh?

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What?

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Like if you're if you're ever like a panic attack, sometimes you can just smell something

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and it'll help you.

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There's something there.

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There's something there, Dave.

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I think it's psychosomatic.

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I think it only works because you want it to work.

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I think your mother's psychosomatic.

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I'm going to play that for Marlo Prescott.

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Jennifer's going to hear that.

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I hope she does.

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All right.

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I love that woman.

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I know you do.

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Justin, I'm glad you're here today because I think I had as I was explaining to you before

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we had a technical technical mishap.

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My goal for this weekend was to write two episodes and record two episodes because I'm

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going to be in New Hampshire next weekend.

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And I don't think either are good, but I did choose the better of the two for you.

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And fingers crossed, I think it'll go well.

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I don't really know.

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You know, you don't need to say that.

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You can say we got a great show for you.

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No, I'm not going to even if even if it's bad, I'm not going to do it to my honest.

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I want to go.

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I'm going to let them know upfront right away that this might be trash.

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No, do it.

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Do that.

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Do that to your audience.

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Am I sabotage?

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They don't know the difference.

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They don't.

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Yeah, they don't know the difference.

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Jim, look, you know, it's all it's all make.

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It's all make anyway.

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So it doesn't matter.

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Oh, well, before we jump into the story, it's been studies on how dumb you're listening.

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All right, Justin, just one quick question.

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What is what is your opinion of children, just children in general?

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I don't care for them.

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Any particular reason?

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Just just general just generally they're terrible.

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Too much racket.

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They're they're sticky.

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True.

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And yeah, they have no spatial awareness.

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You should take it of like newborns.

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I'm talking about like like like six to like preteen 16 years old.

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Yeah.

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Like they can at least wipe their own ass, but they're not fully independent yet.

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Right.

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Still applies everything you just said.

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Yeah.

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All right.

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Sticky.

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They don't like they don't like baths.

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They don't like showers.

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No, that's at that age.

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I don't I don't like showers now.

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It's like the most like annoying part of my day.

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Oh, I love showers.

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I'm sure you do.

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I'm pretty like a good bath, too.

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You look like a bath guy.

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I love a guy.

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I love a good bath.

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I'm telling you, Dave, you said you're a candle guy now.

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I'm not a candle guy now.

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I have one candle.

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You can't see your candle guy.

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So it's a slippery slope from here.

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You get one and then it's just all over.

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All right.

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I'm saying living living with a living with a woman changed my life.

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I'm a candle guy.

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I'm a bath bomb guy.

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I'm a string light guy.

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You're a string light guy.

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Incense to incense.

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Telling you women are full of good ideas.

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Well, Justin, because you have such an aversion to kids, I think this is why I chose this for you.

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So the topic of today's episode is what I think that you're actually you might have meant you might have talked about this on your show.

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I'm not 100 percent sure.

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But we're going to be going over black eyed kids.

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Are you familiar?

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No.

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You don't know the black eyed kids?

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No.

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Oh, it's all bad.

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None of it's good.

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It's like what like what's your opinion on like children in like like Victorian ghost children in horror movies or just like creepy children in general in horror movies?

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They don't scare me.

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They don't.

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OK.

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Well, then this might be fine for you.

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All right. You ready to dive into this?

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Well, fucking babies made out of vapor.

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I don't care.

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What are you going to do?

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Well, this is a little I'm cold.

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Not my problem.

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Not my problem.

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All right.

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You know that you know what I'm talking about.

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I do.

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I don't think most listeners will get the reference to.

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Are you afraid of the dark?

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I think we get that reference from something from 1993.

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Yeah.

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Well, come on.

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Oh, come on.

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Dave, you underestimate your listeners.

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There's been studies done how smart.

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All right, Justin.

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Well, the black eyed kids or backs, if you want to be like an absolute fucking nerd about it, are I don't actually know what they are.

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Some say that they're like cryptids, ghosts, demons.

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Others say they may be like aliens.

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Well, some theorize that they may be like an arm of like the men in black.

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But whatever they are, they're always described the same.

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Aged usually between 16 to 6 to 16 years old with unusually pale skin and their eyes are a solid onyx black from eyelid to eyelid that when gazed upon fill the person encountering them with dread or in some instances seem to put the person into an almost hypnotic state.

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Now, the black eyed kids are more they're more like they're more like a modern urban legend tale.

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And it's often referred to as more of like a creepypasta than an actual paranormal entity.

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Like, like Slender Man or Jeff the Killer, like shit like that.

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I'm sure you know, just a creepypasta creepypasta, spooky spaghetti.

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What's that?

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You know, creepypasta is it's just like, it's like made up Internet horror stories.

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They're just called creepypastas.

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I refuse to believe that you've never talked about that.

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We talked copypasta.

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It's the same.

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It's just Internet shit.

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I don't know what that means, though.

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We just talked about that last week.

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Yeah, I don't know what I don't know why pastas in a copypasta is just like when someone says something stupid and then everyone just continuously posts in comment sections.

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This is a little bit different.

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These are like full fledged, like pretty much like fan fiction stories of made up characters.

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Okay, my boring you just know, I'm tired.

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Well, I'm sorry. We'll get through this quick.

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All right. But I have to.

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The reason why it's labeled as such a creepypasta is because the first ever documented sighting of the black eyed kids happened during the 90s with the rise of the Internet and still now to this day is where most reports of them can be found.

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To be fair, out of like the literal thousands of quote unquote black eyed kid encounter stories.

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There's like TikToks, videos, forum posts. In my opinion, there's maybe like eight that really hold any sort of weight to them. And that weight isn't very heavy. But I found a few stories that well should be taken with like the most literal grain of salt.

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They're pretty fucking gnarly. So, Justin, are you ready to dive into the world of the black eyed kids?

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I was born ready.

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Okay, so I'm going to start us off light with the first story like in a moose bouche, if you will.

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Now this story, I'm going to be honest with you.

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It 100% reads like a Reddit post and is almost for sure 100% not real.

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I found it on a listicle called nine terrifying encounters with black eyed children on a site that's called the lineup. So I can't imagine there's much much truth to the story. Is that like a like a like a barber forum?

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It fucking might as well be dude. They had like lists about just pretty much everything you could think of. But I like the story. So I'm going to pretend like it's real because the vibes of it are good. So let's pretend like it's real. I'm gonna. So the story goes that I promised it's going to be.

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I promised it's going to be a good episode and god damn it. That's going to be.

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I promise the opposite.

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What?

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I just disagree. We're about to make magic here is what I'm getting at.

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Well let's get into it then. So the story goes that late one night a man was sleeping. Oh yeah. Most of these are anonymous. They had no one has names in these because again.

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Again, I don't know how true any of them are.

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So the story goes that late one night, a man was sleeping on the spare bed in his infant daughter's room when he started hearing strange bumping outside his house.

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He decided to just ignore it, chalked it up to the family cat just being a straight up asshole. But the thumping continued getting louder and more frequent.

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The man got up to check the back porch believing it still to be the cat, but the cat was nowhere to be seen.

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He then went to the kitchen and noticed two figures standing outside his front door.

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The figures knocked and the man for some reason decided to open it.

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He sees that there are two young boys, 11 or 12 years old, and we're giving off what he described as a pungent moldy odor.

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Okay yeah.

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They stood there for a bit before they looked up at the man and one of them asks, may we use your telegraph?

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The man noticing right away that these kids had lid to lid black eyeballs and smelled the basement decided to pretty much just ignore the telegraph remark.

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And was like, we don't have phone service here, I'm sorry, and just slammed the door in these kids' faces.

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He made his way back to his daughter's room when the two boys started banging on the walls and windows of his house.

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Too afraid to sleep and fighting the urge to go outside and just full on fight these children.

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And almost certainly paralyzed with fear due to the fact that he was looking into the eyes of a black eyed kid.

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The man held his daughter close to his chest as the pounding persisted all through the night.

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The harassment only ended the moment an alarm clock went off in the house.

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As soon as this happened, the knocking ended and the black eyed kids were nowhere to be seen.

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And that is the first story. That's all.

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I like it.

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It's got to be called the cops or something.

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Because again, this is made up.

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Where was that too?

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Who knows man? There's no details here because.

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I didn't say.

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Yeah, well, in the end, I also kind of I kind of juiced it up a bit.

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Because the in the story, the original one, it says the moment his wife's alarm clock went off in the house.

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And I was like, first of all, where was his wife during all she didn't hear any of this.

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She just fucking just conked at.

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She's like one of those like fucking like stay at home bombs who just pops Xanax and drinks wine all day.

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She was out. She's done for the just done.

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Yeah, she's like goddamn Helga Pataki's mother.

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That's that was in my head.

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That was exactly what I was thinking.

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But yeah, I just like that because it kind of has good like it runs me like the strangers.

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You remember that movie? Yeah, that kind of vibe to it.

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00:12:30,200 --> 00:12:33,200
It went nowhere. Nothing happened. It was kind of a bummer.

245
00:12:33,200 --> 00:12:39,200
But for our second story, this guy doesn't have a friend with a gun.

246
00:12:39,200 --> 00:12:43,200
Come down there and she'd fire it into the air, scare those kids a little bit.

247
00:12:43,200 --> 00:12:45,200
But like was the kid not freaking out?

248
00:12:45,200 --> 00:12:48,200
Like was the daughter just like chill with this?

249
00:12:48,200 --> 00:12:50,200
She's probably becoming one.

250
00:12:50,200 --> 00:12:54,200
I don't know. I wonder if that's like a side effect.

251
00:12:54,200 --> 00:12:58,200
I don't know. But only if they bite you.

252
00:12:58,200 --> 00:13:01,200
Oh, kind of like vampire. They do kind of play by vampire rules.

253
00:13:01,200 --> 00:13:04,200
I did learn that when we'll get to that.

254
00:13:04,200 --> 00:13:08,200
But for our second story, I'm going to tell you about the earliest documented encounter,

255
00:13:08,200 --> 00:13:13,200
the one that we were talking about in the intro of The Black Eyed Kid, because timelines be damned.

256
00:13:13,200 --> 00:13:15,200
I just wanted to tell us one second.

257
00:13:15,200 --> 00:13:21,200
Now, this encounter happened in 1996 and comes to us courtesy of a man named Brian Bethel,

258
00:13:21,200 --> 00:13:26,200
who was a senior staff writer for the Abilene Reporter News in Abilene, Texas.

259
00:13:26,200 --> 00:13:29,200
His story goes that around 10 p.m. one night,

260
00:13:29,200 --> 00:13:33,200
Bethel was going to pay his Camelot Communications Internet bill after hours.

261
00:13:33,200 --> 00:13:37,200
Now, for our younger listeners, we've already made a bunch of references that you might not get.

262
00:13:37,200 --> 00:13:40,200
But back in the day, you couldn't pay your bills online.

263
00:13:40,200 --> 00:13:43,200
You either had to like mail it in, physically go to pay it.

264
00:13:43,200 --> 00:13:47,200
Or in the case of Bethel, use the after hours mail slot.

265
00:13:47,200 --> 00:13:49,200
Have you ever had to do that, Justin? I've had to do that.

266
00:13:49,200 --> 00:13:51,200
Yeah.

267
00:13:56,200 --> 00:13:58,200
No, I've done it.

268
00:13:58,200 --> 00:14:03,200
Now, Bethel pulled over into the neighboring Westwood movie theater parking lot

269
00:14:03,200 --> 00:14:06,200
so he could use the light from the marquee to write the check.

270
00:14:06,200 --> 00:14:09,200
Well, he must have been like balls deep into writing this check

271
00:14:09,200 --> 00:14:11,200
and just completely unaware of the happenings around him

272
00:14:11,200 --> 00:14:14,200
because suddenly there was a tap on his window.

273
00:14:14,200 --> 00:14:18,200
Startled a bit, Bethel glances up to see two young children

274
00:14:18,200 --> 00:14:22,200
that he guessed to be nine and 13 years old, respectively,

275
00:14:22,200 --> 00:14:24,200
and wearing dark colored hoodies.

276
00:14:24,200 --> 00:14:28,200
He described them as having olive skin, curly hair,

277
00:14:28,200 --> 00:14:36,200
and described the older child as quote unquote, suave.

278
00:14:36,200 --> 00:14:43,200
The older of the two boys knocked again and asked if Bethel would give them

279
00:14:43,200 --> 00:14:47,200
a ride to their mother's house so they could get some money so they could see the movie.

280
00:14:47,200 --> 00:14:52,200
Now, I want you to guess what movie they were going to see in 1996.

281
00:14:52,200 --> 00:14:54,200
You'll never guess what it is.

282
00:14:54,200 --> 00:14:58,200
1996, not Ace Ventura when nature calls.

283
00:14:58,200 --> 00:15:02,200
No, it was, I'll give you a heads a rated R movie.

284
00:15:02,200 --> 00:15:04,200
Bushwhacked.

285
00:15:08,200 --> 00:15:10,200
The movie they were going to see.

286
00:15:10,200 --> 00:15:11,200
It came out in 96.

287
00:15:11,200 --> 00:15:18,200
The movie that they were trying to go see was the final showing of the night for Mortal Kombat.

288
00:15:18,200 --> 00:15:20,200
Oh, I would have got there.

289
00:15:20,200 --> 00:15:25,200
Now, the black guys kids reassured him that it wouldn't take long.

290
00:15:25,200 --> 00:15:27,200
We're just two kids.

291
00:15:27,200 --> 00:15:29,200
And no, we don't have a gun.

292
00:15:31,200 --> 00:15:33,200
Which I don't know.

293
00:15:33,200 --> 00:15:36,200
They're 12 years old in Abilene, Texas.

294
00:15:36,200 --> 00:15:39,200
The small they almost certainly had a gun.

295
00:15:39,200 --> 00:15:40,200
There's no way they didn't.

296
00:15:40,200 --> 00:15:41,200
Yeah.

297
00:15:41,200 --> 00:15:46,200
Now, there's a reason these kids haven't harassed anyone yet, though, if they're in Texas.

298
00:15:46,200 --> 00:15:53,200
Now, the entire time someone's going to come, someone's going to come down and discharge their weapon into the air.

299
00:15:56,200 --> 00:15:58,200
Wrangle them boys.

300
00:15:58,200 --> 00:16:04,200
Now, the entire times interaction, Bethel stated that he was overcome with an irrational fear.

301
00:16:04,200 --> 00:16:08,200
And at one point said he even subconsciously reached out to open his door to let them in.

302
00:16:08,200 --> 00:16:10,200
But like kind of like snap to.

303
00:16:10,200 --> 00:16:15,200
And that's when he noticed the inky black pools that filled the children's eyes.

304
00:16:15,200 --> 00:16:22,200
He described them as, quote, The sort of eyes one sees these days on aliens or bargain basement vampires on late night television.

305
00:16:22,200 --> 00:16:27,200
Solace orbs like two great swaths of a starless sky.

306
00:16:27,200 --> 00:16:31,200
This was just super poetic for talking about nightmare children, I feel like.

307
00:16:33,200 --> 00:16:36,200
He has rolled over black.

308
00:16:36,200 --> 00:16:38,200
He didn't have to go.

309
00:16:38,200 --> 00:16:46,200
Dude, the entire time, the entire time I was like reading about black kids, I just kept thinking they were black like a doll's eyes.

310
00:16:52,200 --> 00:16:54,200
That's exactly what I was referencing.

311
00:16:54,200 --> 00:16:59,200
I know. That's all I could think the entire time was just black black like a doll's eyes.

312
00:16:59,200 --> 00:17:06,200
At this point, I'm assuming Brian has sufficiently filled his pants with shit out of fear.

313
00:17:06,200 --> 00:17:15,200
And the older black kid must have sensed this fear because he started just absolutely pounding on this dude's window screaming, let us in, let us in.

314
00:17:15,200 --> 00:17:17,200
We can't come in unless you invite us in.

315
00:17:17,200 --> 00:17:21,200
We have to come in, which is kind of fucked up and terrifying.

316
00:17:21,200 --> 00:17:27,200
But it kind of broke Brian free from like his abdotic state and was like fucking like hell I do.

317
00:17:27,200 --> 00:17:31,200
And slammed the car in reverse and got out of there real quick.

318
00:17:31,200 --> 00:17:35,200
All the while, both the kids are still standing in the parking lot screaming at him.

319
00:17:35,200 --> 00:17:37,200
You must let us in.

320
00:17:37,200 --> 00:17:40,200
Brian took one last look in his rearview mirror upon exiting.

321
00:17:40,200 --> 00:17:44,200
I think it was just to make sure he didn't like fucking hit one of the kids.

322
00:17:44,200 --> 00:17:48,200
Yeah. But both the kids had mysteriously vanished.

323
00:17:48,200 --> 00:17:54,200
Brian still doesn't know fully what actually happened that night, but he knows that it did happen and it was very real.

324
00:17:54,200 --> 00:18:03,200
And as for how his story became one of the Internet's first quote unquote creepypastas, well, it's due to the fact that he has really shitty friends.

325
00:18:03,200 --> 00:18:20,200
After his encounter, he emailed like a trusted few, like a small circle of friends who in turn were like, you know, fuck this dude's trust and just started spreading it all around the Internet like a bunch of dickheads, like forums, fucking message boards everywhere.

326
00:18:20,200 --> 00:18:24,200
And that's how his story became like pretty big news.

327
00:18:24,200 --> 00:18:26,200
Luckily for him, it didn't ruin like his career.

328
00:18:26,200 --> 00:18:30,200
He still is a like reporter and shit for like the newspapers.

329
00:18:30,200 --> 00:18:35,200
That's kind of cool because I feel like something like this in small town Texas would really just like fuck you like hard.

330
00:18:35,200 --> 00:18:37,200
Right. What's what's his name?

331
00:18:37,200 --> 00:18:38,200
Brian Bethel.

332
00:18:38,200 --> 00:18:39,200
Yeah.

333
00:18:39,200 --> 00:18:55,200
Yeah. I reckon Brian definitely filled his pants with the shit and the child had a insatiable hunger for shit.

334
00:18:55,200 --> 00:19:04,200
That's what I've heard about these creatures is that they fill your pants or that have to have a feast on human shit.

335
00:19:04,200 --> 00:19:06,200
They fucking probably do.

336
00:19:06,200 --> 00:19:07,200
I have no idea.

337
00:19:07,200 --> 00:19:10,200
Now, Justin, our last story.

338
00:19:10,200 --> 00:19:13,200
It's a little weirder and a bit more terrifying.

339
00:19:13,200 --> 00:19:15,200
And it's probably my favorite one.

340
00:19:15,200 --> 00:19:19,200
Again, this is a this is an anonymous story.

341
00:19:19,200 --> 00:19:28,200
Late one night, an anonymous elderly couple were fast asleep when they were abruptly awoken by three loud knocks at their front door.

342
00:19:28,200 --> 00:19:31,200
The couple got up and answered it to find two young children standing there.

343
00:19:31,200 --> 00:19:37,200
The children asked if they could come inside, which when it comes to black eyed kids, never let them inside.

344
00:19:37,200 --> 00:19:40,200
It's like vampire rules again, because nothing good will come of it.

345
00:19:40,200 --> 00:19:44,200
But the couple, well, hesitant, let them in.

346
00:19:44,200 --> 00:19:48,200
The kids sat down on the couch the entire time averting eye contact.

347
00:19:48,200 --> 00:19:53,200
The wife headed into the kitchen to make some cocoa while the husband stayed in the living room with the two kids.

348
00:19:53,200 --> 00:19:57,200
He tried asking them some questions just to get an idea of like, who are you?

349
00:19:57,200 --> 00:19:58,200
Where did you come from?

350
00:19:58,200 --> 00:20:01,200
Why the fuck are you in my house this late at night?

351
00:20:01,200 --> 00:20:12,200
But these questions went unanswered as the kids just sat there in silence while the entire time the family cat is cowering in the corner and hissing at these two kids.

352
00:20:12,200 --> 00:20:14,200
The way is a good sign. Yeah, right.

353
00:20:14,200 --> 00:20:18,200
The the wife returned from the kitchen with the cocoa for the two kids.

354
00:20:18,200 --> 00:20:24,200
But as soon as she did, the kids looked up at her and in unison asked to use the bathroom.

355
00:20:24,200 --> 00:20:29,200
It was then that she noticed the black voids of the children's eyes completely freaked out.

356
00:20:29,200 --> 00:20:41,200
But like remaining calm, she showed them where the bathroom was and immediately returned to her husband, whose nose suddenly started streaming blood as he asked, did you see their eyes?

357
00:20:41,200 --> 00:20:44,200
The wife nodded and held the tissue to her husband's nose.

358
00:20:44,200 --> 00:20:51,200
Suddenly and without warning, the electricity goes out in their house and the house just goes pitch black.

359
00:20:51,200 --> 00:20:56,200
The children reappear from the bathroom until the couple again in unison.

360
00:20:56,200 --> 00:20:58,200
Our parents have arrived.

361
00:20:58,200 --> 00:21:05,200
The kids walk out the house, leaving the front door wide open because, of course, like, what are you raising a bond?

362
00:21:05,200 --> 00:21:07,200
Do you try to eat? Come on.

363
00:21:07,200 --> 00:21:11,200
But that's a little rude, right?

364
00:21:11,200 --> 00:21:12,200
That's what I'm saying.

365
00:21:12,200 --> 00:21:15,200
Oh, she made cocoa. They didn't drink it.

366
00:21:15,200 --> 00:21:17,200
They just fucking left with leaving the door open.

367
00:21:17,200 --> 00:21:19,200
I didn't flush the toilet when they left the bathroom.

368
00:21:19,200 --> 00:21:21,200
Why were they both in there at the same time?

369
00:21:21,200 --> 00:21:23,200
They were snooping around looking for prescription drugs.

370
00:21:23,200 --> 00:21:24,200
I wouldn't doubt it.

371
00:21:24,200 --> 00:21:25,200
Ungrateful.

372
00:21:25,200 --> 00:21:32,200
They drink all my fucking diamond tap.

373
00:21:32,200 --> 00:21:34,200
I get the grape flavor because I like it.

374
00:21:34,200 --> 00:21:36,200
I know it's for kids, but I like it.

375
00:21:36,200 --> 00:21:39,200
I do enjoy the grape diamond tap.

376
00:21:39,200 --> 00:21:40,200
It's probably the better of all of them.

377
00:21:40,200 --> 00:21:48,200
But through the door, the couple could see two very tall, very pale and very slender men standing at the end of their driveway.

378
00:21:48,200 --> 00:21:53,200
They watched as all four of them gotten to a black limousine style car and drove off.

379
00:21:53,200 --> 00:21:56,200
But this wasn't the end to the couple's misfortune.

380
00:21:56,200 --> 00:22:04,200
Over the next month or so, the family would have some strange and unfortunate incidents like lights going out in their house randomly.

381
00:22:04,200 --> 00:22:07,200
They found their cat dead in a pool of its own blood.

382
00:22:07,200 --> 00:22:13,200
And the husband continued to have nosebleeds that eventually turned out to be a rare form of cancer.

383
00:22:13,200 --> 00:22:19,200
So, yeah, whether those things were caused by the black eyed kids, I don't know.

384
00:22:19,200 --> 00:22:20,200
But who's to say?

385
00:22:20,200 --> 00:22:21,200
Oh, yeah.

386
00:22:21,200 --> 00:22:23,200
But they were.

387
00:22:23,200 --> 00:22:25,200
But yeah, there you have it.

388
00:22:25,200 --> 00:22:32,200
These are just a few of the stories of the many stories of the black eyed kids, what they are, who fuck knows.

389
00:22:32,200 --> 00:22:36,200
Is any of this real?

390
00:22:36,200 --> 00:22:37,200
You asking me?

391
00:22:37,200 --> 00:22:39,200
Yeah, it's just open question.

392
00:22:39,200 --> 00:22:41,200
Anyone can answer.

393
00:22:41,200 --> 00:22:43,200
I believe it.

394
00:22:43,200 --> 00:22:44,200
I believe it all.

395
00:22:44,200 --> 00:22:45,200
I don't buy that.

396
00:22:45,200 --> 00:22:46,200
But yeah.

397
00:22:46,200 --> 00:22:47,200
So what did you think?

398
00:22:47,200 --> 00:22:48,200
What are your theories?

399
00:22:48,200 --> 00:22:49,200
What do you think?

400
00:22:49,200 --> 00:22:51,200
Do you think they're aliens, ghosts, vampires?

401
00:22:51,200 --> 00:22:54,200
I got some black eyed kids in my neighborhood.

402
00:22:54,200 --> 00:22:56,200
Yeah, but that's probably just domestic abuse.

403
00:22:56,200 --> 00:22:59,200
No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.

404
00:22:59,200 --> 00:23:01,200
No, they're always visiting my house.

405
00:23:01,200 --> 00:23:03,200
I said, they say, can I come in?

406
00:23:03,200 --> 00:23:05,200
I said, no, no, you don't belong.

407
00:23:05,200 --> 00:23:07,200
Get out of here.

408
00:23:07,200 --> 00:23:11,200
You don't belong.

409
00:23:11,200 --> 00:23:12,200
Shit.

410
00:23:12,200 --> 00:23:13,200
But yeah, but that's that's the story.

411
00:23:13,200 --> 00:23:14,200
I hope it was good.

412
00:23:14,200 --> 00:23:15,200
I hope you enjoyed them.

413
00:23:15,200 --> 00:23:16,200
It was pretty good.

414
00:23:16,200 --> 00:23:17,200
It was fun.

415
00:23:17,200 --> 00:23:18,200
Yeah.

416
00:23:18,200 --> 00:23:22,200
So I mean, the last thing, I mean, they got a couple of slender daddies.

417
00:23:22,200 --> 00:23:29,200
Well, that's where the theory that they might be men in black proxy people come from, because like they do a lot of weird shit like that.

418
00:23:29,200 --> 00:23:37,200
Like they like the men in black are known for like saying weird shit like in those kids asking, can we use your telegraph?

419
00:23:37,200 --> 00:23:41,200
Like, that's kind of weird having men in black come in.

420
00:23:41,200 --> 00:23:55,200
Like the other thing, too, is that they that some people say that the men that the black eyed kids skin might not be their skin.

421
00:23:55,200 --> 00:24:00,200
Like they're like they're wearing like a skin suit and they put makeup on over the skin suit to look more human.

422
00:24:00,200 --> 00:24:03,200
The men in black are known to do that, too.

423
00:24:03,200 --> 00:24:06,200
And yeah, it's just all it's all weird.

424
00:24:06,200 --> 00:24:08,200
It's all nonsense.

425
00:24:08,200 --> 00:24:11,200
If you ask me, I don't I don't buy the black eyed kids.

426
00:24:11,200 --> 00:24:21,200
But maybe just because I've only seen like most of my exposure to the black eyed kids has been like those shitty tech talk videos with black eyed kid comes to my house and it's just someone wearing West Borland's like contact lenses.

427
00:24:21,200 --> 00:24:37,200
You know what I mean? Yeah, yeah. Which is the reason why the first one like the the very first one from the 1996 seems credible is because in 1996 you couldn't just get all black contact lenses, especially if you were a 12 year old in Abilene Tech.

428
00:24:37,200 --> 00:24:42,200
Like there was no hot topic that you couldn't just go get that kind of stuff nowadays.

429
00:24:42,200 --> 00:24:46,200
They don't sell that kind of they don't sell that kind of stuff on topic either.

430
00:24:46,200 --> 00:24:52,200
Well, no, we do that. But you know what I mean, though, like could maybe I don't know.

431
00:24:52,200 --> 00:24:55,200
It is what it is. All right, Justin.

432
00:24:55,200 --> 00:24:59,200
I look the 1996 ones legit. I'm

433
00:24:59,200 --> 00:25:06,200
I fuck with that one. I do. I do. Like that one seems more credible, but also at the same time.

434
00:25:06,200 --> 00:25:12,200
He is a he is an he's a writer like he knows how to spin a yarn, if you will.

435
00:25:12,200 --> 00:25:19,200
So who knows? But I do like the fact that his friends suck and he sent an email.

436
00:25:19,200 --> 00:25:32,200
Like to me, that's fucking hilarious because like that's what our friends would do. I feel like if I emailed you a story about a bonkers nightmare demon child's you'd be like, do a fuck this.

437
00:25:32,200 --> 00:25:38,200
Everyone has to read this. No, no, I wouldn't put it on. I wouldn't put it on the forums unless I ask you first.

438
00:25:38,200 --> 00:25:44,200
No, but you forwarded someone else, though, I feel like. I don't think so.

439
00:25:44,200 --> 00:25:47,200
Well, that's well, there you go. I appreciate that. You're good.

440
00:25:47,200 --> 00:25:52,200
I probably read it to Curtis or something, but I don't think I don't think I forwarded or anything like that.

441
00:25:52,200 --> 00:25:56,200
Yeah. Well, I appreciate that. All right, Justin.

442
00:25:56,200 --> 00:26:00,200
Is there anything you want to say? If you told me not to, I'd say, OK, yeah, I won't.

443
00:26:00,200 --> 00:26:07,200
Well, maybe that's what maybe he didn't put in the email like, hey, don't share this with anyone.

444
00:26:07,200 --> 00:26:13,200
They just thought that it was fair game because I mean, you already emailed it to me and like four other people.

445
00:26:13,200 --> 00:26:25,200
Why wouldn't anyone else? You know what I mean? Look, if I had if I had a dollar for every time some kid with black eyes slammed on my window, said, let them in.

446
00:26:25,200 --> 00:26:28,200
I wouldn't have much money at all, Dave. I wouldn't have much money at all.

447
00:26:28,200 --> 00:26:33,200
It's never happened to me. Yeah, because it doesn't happen to anyone ever. It's not.

448
00:26:33,200 --> 00:26:37,200
But anyways, if it's going to happen, it's probably going to happen to me. You think so?

449
00:26:37,200 --> 00:26:44,200
You think you that's if it happens to any. I mean, you've already you've already been you've already been scouted by aliens once in your life.

450
00:26:44,200 --> 00:26:49,200
So, oh, yeah, many times.

451
00:26:49,200 --> 00:26:58,200
All right, Justin, is there anything you want to promote before we sign and sign off this bitch? No.

452
00:26:58,200 --> 00:27:03,200
So Justin co-hosts a podcast with one of our good friends, Curtis Charles, called The Cool Parents Podcast.

453
00:27:03,200 --> 00:27:07,200
It's pretty good. It's funny. I've been talking in pretty good.

454
00:27:07,200 --> 00:27:13,200
I've been I've been talking in the foot fiend voice a lot lately just because that one tweet I saw recently.

455
00:27:13,200 --> 00:27:18,200
And Pumsi kissing.

456
00:27:18,200 --> 00:27:24,200
Yeah, we got that. We got the podcast. We got the band. Same name. Cool Parents.

457
00:27:24,200 --> 00:27:28,200
Oh, yeah, I forgot there was a band part of that. Yeah, there's a band. Cool Parents. They're really good.

458
00:27:28,200 --> 00:27:32,200
It's better than the podcast. I got another I got another band, but there's nothing out yet.

459
00:27:32,200 --> 00:27:38,200
It doesn't matter. It's good. It's got people in it that are good people.

460
00:27:38,200 --> 00:27:44,200
That's all right. So, yeah, find the cool parents on Instagram, cool parents worldwide.

461
00:27:44,200 --> 00:27:52,200
You can find it on Spotify, Apple School Parents, parentheses, not a parenting podcast.

462
00:27:52,200 --> 00:27:56,200
You can find the band on Spotify as well. Everywhere else has cool parents.

463
00:27:56,200 --> 00:28:01,200
And yeah, if you want to follow us on Instagram, it's Crypto Cocktail.

464
00:28:01,200 --> 00:28:06,200
Follow us on TikTok. It's Crypto Cocktail Party. We have a Patreon. It's five dollars a month.

465
00:28:06,200 --> 00:28:10,200
That's it. It's pretty cool. We also have a Discord server.

466
00:28:10,200 --> 00:28:18,200
I don't fucking know what to do with it, but please join and start talking to me because it's very lonely in there.

467
00:28:18,200 --> 00:28:22,200
With that, Justin, do you want to say bye to everyone? Nope.

468
00:28:48,200 --> 00:28:51,200
You