Drunk Guy C for now!
Oh my goodness!
Hello one, hello all!
Welcome back!
And welcome to the finale of Love Death and Ice, the Dragon Vault.
Peace everybody!
I hope all you guys got your drinks.
I hope you're all fucking excited.
I hope you got drinks and snacks and I hope you're ready with your dice fingers because
tonight we finished this story and tonight we send out.
Joining us in celebration as we finish off this story tonight.
Look we got a lot in store but honestly we're just happy.
We've been doing this fucking story for you know almost five months and it's good.
It's good.
It's so much fun.
Amber Lamps!
Look you guys, hello.
I'm Turkey by the way and I'm here with these three people.
Starting with Fishy.
Hi Fishy, got anything to say?
Happy finale buddy!
Hello!
Hi, happy finale.
I'm very excited for the season finale.
We'll see where Bumberland ends up after all of this.
Yes!
Connor?
I'm very excited because I am a god.
I shall not challenge.
Yes!
You look quiet too.
You want to move your mic closer?
Prodious, what say you?
I'm very excited.
Listen, listen, anything can happen tonight.
I got my happy ending last week so anything can happen.
You heard it here first folks.
Prodious got their happy ending last week.
Very good.
Good for you.
Happy endings for everyone!
The endings!
Yes!
We don't love no happy endings.
Is it just what we live for?
I mean, Raz also got a happy ending last week.
Oh yes I did.
You bet your sweet baby I did.
We're going to run the full intro for one last time as we look over the intro.
Remember where we started and think about where we are now because tonight we finished
the story.
Everyone in chat, one final time, over the long intro, we'd like all of you to spam your
favorite emote.
Over and over and over and over.
Understood, chat?
You have your assignment.
But for now, we run the intro, we listen to it while we sit back and drink our drinks
to get into the zone, into the mood, for tonight is the finale of love, death and ice, the
Dragon Rock.
It's been 30 years since the mysterious heroes arose and banished the Mind Flayer colony
back to the astral plane, saving the people of Mead Harbor.
In those 30 years, the king of all intoxica, Rufflecock, has defended his crown more than
once.
The last time this happened, a war raged amongst the realms and almost destroyed all that was
once peaceful in our world and has since turned everything upside down.
The Jarl and leader of Helmfurth, Rania Rook, a female Dragonborn, believed Rufflecock not
strong or smart enough to lead our great land, so she took up arms and amassed an army.
At her side, Mead Harbor and its leader, Zidilak, the Gnome, and his army of auto-gnomes.
The king of course retaliated by calling upon all of the friends he had made over the years
including the Okart Kingdom, the Hippogryphs from the astral plane, the Firebeard Dwarven
clan, and an army of warforged robots that were created just for this war.
Many years passed during this war, intoxicants picked sides and blood was shed all over the
world.
In the end, Rufflecock was victorious, leading his own army riding on a valiant steed into
the last battle at Mead Harbor.
The war was won, and Rania Rook was pushed back into the mountains of East Gryph, but
at a cost.
Our king, battle scarred and worn, now lays in his deathbed in Stein Kingdom and awaits
to crown his successor before he spills his last breath.
Warforged now walk amongst the people of the realm, and without the war, they are lost
and without a cause.
They are wildly not accepted in most places, and intoxicants don't even accept them as
people and constantly call them names wherever they can.
The war and bloodshed also caused dragons to wake from their hundred year slumber, and
they rule the skies once again, raining down fire and brimstone on local farmsteads and
towns.
This has caused a majority of the worshippers of gods to be without churches or steeples,
and most have lost faith.
Even the mention of a god is replied to with a spat at your feet.
The goblins have slowly been developing technologies like gunpowder and bombs and trade relationships,
allowing them to gain independence and are wildly accepted in most major cities due to
their trade and are now demanding sovereignty far south in Eradrum.
Common Steel City A city of the people, it is, by and large,
the most civilized city in Intoxica.
Yet civilized does not mean safe, nor does it mean easy to navigate.
Common Steel is huge, with multiple districts and harbors for trade on the river that runs
right through the middle.
And after all this, Common Steel City stands strong, in large part due to its unrelenting
loyalty of its people to the king.
They await his decision of who will get the crown next, and all yarls of all independent
realms and cities, even factions and guild leaders, have thrown their hat in the ring
to try and be the next true king.
Some have even heard rumors of a dragon vault hidden somewhere in the central cheer, and
have come to Common Steel City to try and search it out, in hopes that the gold they
find there will help them win their way to the crown.
But they aren't the only ones trying to find the Dragon Vault.
Hello everybody!
Welcome on, welcome all, right back here to love death and ice.
This is the Dragon Vault, this is the finale!
While we were running our intro, we actually got a raid from Owlbear Inn!
Thanks guys!
Well come on in, innit!
Thank you so much for a raid, that was your stream, and for those who are subscribed,
you're one for 24 months.
You know what that means.
That means two years.
Of course baby, thanks Sora!
Cheers friend!
Thank you so much for supporting the show.
Two years.
Well, once again everybody just joining us, this is our finale.
This is a celebration, um, quick maths, I know, this is a celebration about our lovely
three characters.
T357, the war-forged shadow, the brand new leader of torture, and assassination at the
Legion Guild.
Reverend Raz Sanders, the brand new harbourer of souls, the brand new bringer of death,
and of course, Omlin, the one whom seems to be betrothed to the new queen.
Or so we shall see.
Now tonight your three stories come to an end, but before they do, they must begin.
And every good beginning always begins with a story.
A story story full of story.
A good story, no a bad story, but still indeed a story.
For tonight is the finale.
There's a lot of words I just said.
Alright.
Now, when we left off last week everybody, sorry, I'm very excited to be here.
When we left off last week you guys, we left off with you guys back in Bumlin's Rough Riders,
the gambling hall that you've been building up over the course of this campaign.
At this point now there are loads of ruffians that help run the place for good or for bad,
under the table, thieving, whatever, what have you, but the business is still running
and running well.
Now when you guys left, we last left off with you guys sitting around a table in the inn
one last time, and you sit around this table with all of the ruffians, of course Scoob,
the ruffian, the leader, the one very tall ruffian who's balding on the top but has extremely
long hair down the side, so you sit around with him and in the corner is your Griffin
Bumlin, Sweetroll, I'm just setting the scene here, as Sweetroll snoozes away.
Now it is late afternoon here as you're having your final bout together.
Now the bar is open and has been running, but you guys really haven't had the time
to be able to eat and enjoy a drink here, so while the camera spins around the table
to each one of you, what do you have in front of you, what are you doing, and of course
we're going to start with T357.
When the camera spins, what do you have going on here?
Help me set the scene one last time.
I have both Mutinex and Nim sitting on my lap at the table.
Beautiful, you're two war-forged companions.
Nimble Rites.
Nimble Rites, that's it.
How big do you think they are?
Do you have them sitting on your lap?
They are about the same size as Timo, they are about waist-height on me.
They're like gnome Nimble Rites, alright, I'm into that.
They're sitting on your lap and just discussing things.
Then the camera turns and we see Raz.
Raz, what do you have going on at the table?
Well, I'm just kind of like sitting there waiting, twiddling my thumbs, checking my
nails and stuff, and then all of a sudden a portal opens and my clone steps through
it.
He's like, well everything's all hunky-dory in Deathland.
I'm like, alright, cool, thanks bud.
That's what you decided to name it?
Deathland?
Well, I, you know, yeah.
Purgatory.
Deathland.
Purgatory.
You know you could change it, you like own it now.
Well, I don't know man.
Whatever people want to call it, that's what they'll call it.
Okay, did you write this or have a stroke?
I had a stroke.
A nimble write with a W, R-I-G-H-T, is kind of like a robot, it's a clockwork robot.
As the camera spins to you, Boblin, what do we see?
You see Boblin counting a bunch of gold and silver, and you notice the profits from Boblin's
Rough Riders.
Then you see him look around and scoop a little pile and put it in his pocket, and then goes
back to counting more gold and stuff.
Nice.
You wanna roll me a sleight of hand there, Boblin, a dexterity trick?
No, my macros don't work anymore.
Nice, Horrie.
Okay, let's go.
Let's go, Beach Hally!
It's the finale, baby!
We're here celebrating.
Yeah!
The night.
Now.
Scoob sees it, he looks at you and he goes, well, you know, we ruffians, you know.
That's your money, Boblin, we working for you.
You don't have to try, you don't gotta be all stealthy, you know.
It's alright, Scoob, it's alright.
You're in for nothing.
Boblin, you know, you're stealing your own money.
What?
Yeah, it's your money.
It's my money, technically.
Oh.
Well, I mean, we work for you and that's the money that we brought in, right?
So we're giving it to you and then you're stealing it, but it's yours.
Whatever deal you got going on with those two, that's on you, but just for me, just
so you know.
Oh.
Wow.
It's a good question.
You see him scoop like a little nother like bit pile into his pocket, look back at Scoob
wig, say shh, and it goes back to counting money.
Alright.
2357, will you answer certifiables question there in chat?
Out of curiosity, how much does Boblin still owe?
Well, if we factor in how much y'all have been giving biggies and coins rating from
above over the last few months, he still owes about 200,000 gold.
There you have it.
He got 50,000 taken off.
There you go.
Now as you guys are sitting around, you are wrapping up your final things before you pull
out the dragon stone to figure out the location of the dragon vault once and for all.
But you don't hear a knock at the door, but sunlight kind of peeps in as the door opens
and T357 you turn and look and you see it's Schemo and he's standing there and he has
his journal in his hand and he kind of waves at you and he's like, hey, he's got a cigar
in his mouth, puts it out on his boot, looks up at you and he's like, can we talk for a
second?
Just just me and you.
Absolutely.
Let's talk about a little bit what just happened.
Schemo came in the building where you guys are sitting around the table and asked to
speak to T357 alone.
You approached him while he was holding his journal.
You get up from the table, you set the nimble rights down and you.
I put the nimble rights in my seat side by side.
And approached Schemo.
Nice.
Hell yeah.
Because the religion belongs to Aphrodite.
Yes.
The finale that was the finale.
So as you approach him, he does put out his cigar and then he looks up at you because
he is a gnome.
He's got, you know, his graying black beard, scar over his eye, big old green eyes.
He looks up at you and he's like, so I've been reading through my journal and first
of all, I've remembered a lot and I would love to get to know you a little bit better
if I know you have a big thing to go and do, but once you're done, if we could spend some
more time together, that would be awesome.
But there's something else I need to tell you.
My father, well, our father, he's still alive.
He's not dead.
In my journal, I have notes of him trying to create some kind of robot army of more
war-forged to overthrow Intoxica and Common Steel and I think that maybe is where he's
been and I think it might be smart for us to find him and maybe put a stop to that.
I agree.
So I would be delighted to spend time with you.
Me too.
Well, once you're done doing whatever it is that you're going to go and do, you know,
I think we should read into this some more and do it together.
What do you say?
I admit medical to this.
Well good luck today then and I'll see you when you get back.
And he like tries to stretch up to like give you a kiss on the cheek, but he can't reach
you.
Oh, I'm picking that short king up.
I'm picking him up.
Okay, you pick him up.
Sweet roll.
No, not on the table.
Sweet roll, get down.
Sweet roll.
He goes forward to kiss you on the cheek as you pick him up.
He's like, oh.
I gave him a little pet on the cheek and a hug.
Nice.
He's like, his arms are dangling.
You're like squeezing him.
He's like, all right.
Okay.
And he's like, all right.
And he put him down and he's like, all right.
You can see underneath his scarding in his face, he's blushing a little bit.
He's like, all right.
He walks out.
I'll see you later.
I'll see you.
This is another Tuesday.
That's right.
God, I'm blown away by the chat support.
It's still like going through my head.
Thank you guys again.
Thank you so much.
You're in about an hour.
You can start another high train to bring him further.
That's very true.
Very true.
I can't wait to see what y'all have in the sea.
You'll see what we have in store for you for the next campaign.
It's going to be glorious.
Now you go back to your seat, sit down on the center of the table is sitting the dragon
stone and all of you look at it.
But before you are able to do anything or move forward with it at all, there is a knocking
at the door and then a bunch of Kings guard walk inside of the door.
There's a bunch of them one by one.
Now we have our permit.
Announcing that we can stand there the entire time.
And then she walks in the door.
Yeah.
You start talking.
They completely ignore anything you're saying.
And she walks in and she goes, all right, at ease boys.
And they all drop their weapons down.
Some of them like take a seat at the bar and start ordering drinks from like the ruffians
and shit.
And Ursa walks over to the table.
She sees you.
He's like, I let him drink.
That's okay.
It's fine.
They work hard.
Hello, Bomblin.
Hey, sorry to intrude, but I had some free time today.
There's a lot of voting and things that I have to pass on.
King Rufflecock is doing his best to teach me the ways of the kingdom.
And I actually had some free time today.
So I wanted to come by and say hello and see you.
I know you did promise me a date.
So I wanted to see how that was going.
Of course I promised you a date.
But we have early oppressing matters at the moment.
I told you once we got done with the oppressing matters, then I could come back and we could
rebuild our people, our Bergen people.
That's a weird way to say that.
I guess you're not much of a romantic.
I mean, you do.
Well, I mean, yeah, kind of.
But I would have to say that your fur is looking rather thick for this coming winter.
I wonder how she takes that.
Roll me a Charisma there, Bomblin.
Let's get you a card.
That's an 18, baby.
She's like, yes, it will stay warm.
You can detect thoughts of all creatures and persons you can see.
For the next minute.
That's your Chaos card, Bomblin.
Whose mind do you want to read?
Ursula's.
What'd she think about my toothy smile?
You hear, uh, where is it?
He has a very toothy smile, doesn't he?
Hmm.
Well, it's not very much of a romantic either, but he's the only other male Bergen left.
And I have to do.
Hopefully he brings me a salmon, because that is the way it's with it.
Oh, right.
Oh my God.
I almost forgot.
Tradition states.
Would you like to go out for a sushi, my lady?
Maybe we could go and get a nice salmon.
Yes, I would love to.
Do you have time now, or do you want to do that after whatever you were going to do?
You know what?
Sometimes love cannot wait, my lady.
And I would love to do it right now.
I will drop everything that I'm doing.
I'm gonna drop a bunch of coins that I was counting, and then I'm going to slide one
off the table and put it in my pocket.
Nice.
Yeah.
Steal something.
Scoob sees you.
He just like-
I bought a finger last week.
Flowers and a salmon.
Yeah.
Oh, right.
And then we had a pressing matters.
Put that salmon go.
Oh, no.
I don't know what I did with this habit.
I hope I didn't leave it in a terrible place.
Oh, well.
Anyways, would you like to go out for a sushi?
Yeah.
I guess we're going to jump cut then.
You say that.
She says yes.
And then we jump cut over to a restaurant here in Common Steel City that you guys go
to.
I'm going to allow chat before.
I'll let you go in a sec.
But chat, go ahead, use the name of thing and throw out a bunch of random names of restaurants
and we're going to let Momlin pick what restaurant he takes her to.
So use the name of thing command, make it canon in our world, possibly one of the final
ones of the campaign.
So go ahead and do it.
Make it canon in our world so we can write it down.
Proteus, what do you got for it?
In his drubbing of everything, did he leave the stone of the Lord on the table?
Yeah, it's still there.
Yeah.
I'm going to pocket it until we need it.
Nice.
Okay, Momlin, we jump cut over to you guys sitting at a table in a restaurant.
And while you're there, there are a bunch of guards all around like watching you guys
eye to eye.
And she says, Well, thank you for bringing me here.
What's the name of this place again?
Yeah.
Wow.
These are interesting.
Yeah.
I'm gonna go with this is called War Poodles Balls.
Yes.
It's nice.
It's like a ball buffet, sushi place.
Yes.
Okay.
Now, what's going to happen now is we're not going to roleplay this whole sequence.
But what I want to do is you guys are sitting here eating.
Someone visualize these two bears just devouring salmon together in the most disgusting manner.
Kind of like all the people around you at the other tables are disgusted by the way
that you're eating these.
But a lot of them have like this sense of respect because it's literally the queen that
you're eating with.
So a lot of people just watch.
But you guys are fucking bears eating salmon, right?
What we're gonna do is-
Yeah, like from a barrel, like a barrel of fish.
You're gonna roll me-
Full charisma check just to see how the whole date goes in itself.
And you got to beat a 16 to succeed.
So this is a very important role.
Can I still detect thoughts?
Yes, I think so.
Can I see how she's liking the date?
You know, that's actually a good point because the detect thoughts and you detected on her.
I'm gonna make this an easy role.
So it's only gonna be a 13 that you got to beat to make it go well.
All right.
Because you can detect her thoughts still.
Is that right?
Yeah.
Jesus Christ.
Is a nine.
Not good.
So even though you can detect her thoughts, it doesn't go very well.
Unless chat wants to help you peruse the queen.
By the end of the date-
Real.
Go ahead.
All right.
All right, thanks.
Bare minimum, semen fisheries.
Oh, semen fisheries.
Oh, that's an 11.
Whack.
By the end of the date, you can tell that you're going to have to take her out again
to be able to, you know, persuade her, seduce her, et cetera.
So you will not be getting your maximum milestone reward on this day or you failed on this role.
But you will have another opportunity.
Yeah.
So as you guys are leaving the restaurant, she has all the Kingsguard around her.
She looks at you and she goes, well, that was something.
Thank you, Bombay.
I mean, it's a three-parter, you know, trying to make sure you're nice and well fed.
So that way during part two of our three-part date trip extravaganza, you know, that way
you're not all hungry.
Hmm.
Okay, Bombay.
You can't forget we have the other two sections.
It's all a part of the plan.
Yeah.
Roll for initiative.
Gotta rush into love.
A new person sits on the couch.
And then you gotta slow down immediately.
Sounds yogi.
Believe that.
Cheers, yogi.
Thanks for joining the show.
Cheers.
She's like, okay, well, I look forward to the next part of this date.
I'm gonna go finish up my training with King Rufflecock and I'll contact you soon and maybe
we can get that started.
Okay?
Sounds great.
I'll get the paperwork in line.
Okay.
Sounds good.
She leaves back with the Kingsguard and then we jump cut back to you reentering the ruffians
bar and you can see that the ruffians are all kind of like annoyed that you literally
dropped everything to go on the date with the queen.
That scoop looks at you and he's like, well, you may know.
I hope it went well.
You know, I mean, you dropped everything to go and do that with her.
So did it go good at least?
I mean, did you get it in or out?
I don't know how bears work.
All right.
Bear doesn't kiss and tell or lick and tell.
I respect.
I see that.
Also respect.
All right.
Well, you know.
That's pretty inappropriate workplace.
Commentary there, Scoob.
I'm going to need you to go back to the back kitchen and make sure everything gets ready
for tonight.
Yeah, that's right.
You're asking me about my personal affairs.
I thought you were a ruffian.
Sorry about that, boss.
Get back to work.
What am I talking about?
Sorry about that.
We do have a lot to clean up after them Kingsguard came in here anyway.
They begin cleaning up you three finally sit at the table together with the stone in 2357's
pocket.
You guys are ready to finally find the location to the vault.
What do you guys do?
I'd say let's let's find a location.
Let's not wait on it.
Yeah.
Yes, you weren't here the first time we talked to the stone brace yourself for possibly the
most annoying thing ever.
Okay.
I'm going to place the stone on the table and say unmute.
There you go.
I like to think he did certifiable.
I like to think he did.
You say unmute.
I set it on the table and then this voice comes out of the stone that is super annoying
kind of high pitched.
It sounds like what did I say?
It sounds like Gilbert Godfrey kind of the word death has been banned.
How dare you?
You just took Raz's whole identity.
That's my entire religion asshole.
You're the religion of unlikings.
And himself.
Yeah.
Is this suicide?
Voice comes out of the stone and it says, Hi, you muted me for like two whole weeks
and I've been here waiting for you.
I was going to guide you along the way.
But of course, what did you do?
You muted me for that long.
Disrespect.
We got all the things you needed.
Oh, well, that's good news.
So what I will say before we do this, I can tell you the location of the vault and get
you there.
Of course, the power in this stone has other capabilities.
But if you choose to do the vault, that's it.
That's all you get.
I give you the info.
That's it.
What are these other abilities?
Well, I think I could maybe help, you know, let's say there was like a king who was dying.
I could absolutely use my power to help him live for at least another 10 years.
Or you know, could enhance magic in a tree, let's say to help that tree grow and take
over a whole city that's preserving nature.
Yeah, that sounds like getting rich.
Where's the vault, my guy?
Why are you stalling?
OK.
Are you ready?
I hope you're ready to write this down, because it's going to come in the form of a riddle,
but I'm going to need one of you to pick me up and look me right in the fucking hole.
All right.
Right in the stone.
I'll pick him up and look him right in the stones.
OK, you're going to feel the stone like, like.
Communing with you.
And then out loud, you guys hear the stone say.
The door to the vault.
You will find it where it all began.
In the kitchen is a door behind the cans.
All right, did you get that?
The door is where it all began.
You'll find it in the kitchen behind the can.
Yeah.
Maybe I should take a look at it.
I don't know.
If you have no fucking idea, I will look.
I want to I want you to think and try just for a second on this riddle.
But if you can't give up, you can make a wisdom roll.
It sounds like he's talking in reference to like us.
Like I.
Is it is it is it fucking tequila's tavern with the with the orcs and behind all this
shit?
Could be.
Oh, you're OK.
Let me let me gaze into this hole on this stone.
You'll find the door where it all began.
It's in the kitchen.
There's a door behind the cans.
Weird.
I mean, we've been to the kitchen.
You can just open the door.
Let me give it a shot.
All right, Bomblin, one last time.
Yeah, you rub me nice and good.
Keep going.
Oh, yeah.
A little bit longer.
All right.
I prefer your son.
Oh, yeah.
OK, you can stop it sensitive.
You can keep rubbing it.
It's sensitive now.
You'll find the door where it all began.
There's a door in the kitchen behind the cans.
That's what my powers tell me.
OK, so that's where it is.
It's your fault.
How do you not know where it is?
I'm a fucking stone lady.
I'm going to open up a portal to Tequila's bar.
OK, Romy Magic.
Hiya.
Can we talk about fucking Raz's first dice roll of the finale and as a natural 20?
That really says something about our story thus far, does it not?
I mean, like, like how many natural 20s would that be?
Twenty one in 13 episodes.
You've rolled 21 natural 20s.
It's fucking rigged.
Here's everybody not 20s.
Can we get them in chat or just spam some Raz heads because it's the same fucking thing
at this point.
It is.
Here's y'all.
Can we put it into reference?
I've only rolled nine.
It's true, huh?
True as fuck.
I am a god.
Yes.
Get fucked, all you normies.
I'm a god.
OK, you open a portal with ease.
Back to the flail and ale tavern.
When you step inside, all three of you do, you can see the flail and ale is still kind
of in disrepair.
A lot of the furniture, though, has been taken out because it's now in your business.
There is still a giant hole in the center of the tavern that leads down to darkness
and black.
But back over the side behind a piano is the door to the kitchen with Raz you are fairly
familiar with.
And also if you turn and head towards that door, you open it up and you walk inside and
you can see the kitchen still is pretty much stacked with like everything on.
By the way, on foundry, we can see your little mouse.
If you have like your mouse on foundry, you see look at my nose.
Whose name is that?
Thank you.
Yeah, we can see your mice on foundries.
You guys are moving things around.
So try to move them off screen.
Frog toys.
Raz is going to get a cart.
As you step into the kitchen, you can see the kitchen still like fully stacked and there
are like shelves all around with like food and everything.
But all the food and shit's kind of been like knocked down and it's a complete mess.
But the shelves are kind of like mashed up against the wall.
Each one of you guys make me a perception check standing in here.
Think about maybe where the cans were.
To waste them.
What is that?
Dirty 20.
You're welcome.
Fucker.
Uh, thank you.
All right, Raz.
Give you your card, shall we?
Cards in hand.
Hunter.
Chaos cards.
Random.
Frog.
Gain the ability to speak with animals for one whole day, bud.
Oh, sweet.
Yeah.
Let's make this fun too.
Because it's a finale, baby.
Can we get some finales in chat?
That's right.
Oh, yeah.
There is a chicken that was being roasted that is half alive.
You are the god of death.
This dead chicken comes alive and his head cocks up and he looks at you and he's like,
hey, what are you looking for?
Looking for some secret door behind some cans.
You know anything about it?
I do.
What are you going to do for me?
I could guide you to the next life.
Oh.
I mean, are chickens allowed to go to the afterlife?
Can you die?
Yes.
Well, then yeah, sure.
Come on, bud.
Okay.
My only dream is to be eaten.
Can you make sure when you guide me on that someone eats me?
Absolutely.
Can I trust you?
Yes, I'm a god, a god of death, really.
Damn it.
Okay.
Well, and his head cocks and turns and his beak points at a shelf that like a bunch of
stuff just been knocked off of.
There's like pasta sauce and shit everywhere.
He's like, I think it's back there.
Okay.
My part.
Your turn.
You got it, buddy.
And then right then I'm going to go ahead and open up a doorway to the sun and point it
at the chicken.
That's not he's already dead.
All right.
Oh, that's a 10 plus two.
You fail.
He's like, I thought you were a god.
Oh, it was a 13.
I thought you were a god.
First day.
Okay.
All right.
Listen here, you little.
I'm going to get you to the next life.
This is my master school.
I killed him.
He was a god.
I'm already dead.
Well, I'm going to make you more dead.
All right, now I'm going to try a soul sack on him.
Okay.
He's already dead.
Well, yeah, I need to extract his life force so that he may go to the other life.
True.
Roll me magic.
He just wants to be eaten.
You can just give him to Boblin.
And and and just as just some pretense, like I'm actually sucking on the chicken to like
get his soul out.
Like chicken.
Chicken juices and shit.
That's a three plus three.
That's a six.
That's why it doesn't work.
He's like, oh, it tickles.
Yeah, that means it's kind of working.
Hold on.
Let me let me try here.
There you go.
Yeah, let me try over here.
Nope, it's still not working.
It's an eight.
Terrible.
Let me show you how to eat it.
All right.
I'm tired of this shit.
Eat it.
OK, you walk over and just eat it.
And he's like, thank you.
You.
Yeah, but I want to eat it all.
No chewing the whole thing.
Yeah.
Can you roll me a con save to see how well that goes down?
It's feathers and beak and everything.
I swear I'm going to make a sticker with rats and bum for back to back.
It kind of scrapes you on the way down.
But it doesn't sit well and you don't chew it well enough.
So what happens is it's still talking inside of your stomach and Raz can hear it talking
for he's the god of death and can hear speak with animals.
You can't hear it, but Raz can now hear the alive dead chicken in your stomach for the
next day.
I've been saying, God damn it.
I mean, me, damn it.
There you go.
So in bumbling stomach, he's like.
But only you can hear it.
That's is he like cheering and stuff.
You're like, oh, finally, I've been eating.
Oh, my dreams have come true.
So happy about it.
He's like, I can feel his stomach acid.
So good.
It's burning me alive.
What a freaky chicken.
And you just say that out loud for no reason.
These two have no idea why you did that.
In context, what happened was you walked over and just tried to suck off a chicken and bumbling
said, that's mine.
Ate it whole.
And then you said, what a freaky chicken.
Because they couldn't hear.
Anyways, guys.
Anyways, guys over here, I'm just going to sweep off all the shit that's on like the
shelves where he pointed.
Nice.
As you do, it reveals what looks like a stone door, but you follow your fingers down the
cracks of it.
And as you're doing that, Raz, you hear behind you and bumbling stomach, he's like, that's
it.
That's it.
And you're like following it down the cracks.
You see there's a seam missing.
And eventually you get to a button and you push it and it opens and the stone begins
to move.
And it reveals a doorway that goes down.
And some of the cans that were there on the ground fall when the doorway opens and tumbled
down the stairs.
And it goes down into darkness.
And, oh cool.
All three of you kick the stuff out of the way and start walking down the stairwell once
and for all.
Eventually you reach.
We have the nimble rights with us.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
You have the nimble rights with you.
Yeah, at least one of them.
You have them both?
Yes.
Okay.
All right.
You have them both with you.
So all five of you guys go down the stairs and then you see it in front of you.
And it's amazing, but kind of confusing.
And you're like, oh shit.
And when we come back in five minutes, everybody, we're going to talk about what that is.
But before we go, we're going to do one final thumbnail pose of this campaign chat.
Look, you guys, it's a fucking finale, everybody.
So if you have some ideas of what you want these guys to pose as, throw them into chat
so we can get them green screen posed.
We can also make GIFs and shit.
So if you have like a GIF idea you want them to do, throw that into chat and then they
will do that thing.
And then it's your job, chat, the Court of Chaos, it's your job to screenshot these green
screen poses and put them into the frigging screenshot chat in the Discord.
And if you want me to make something fun with them for you, you have an idea, just tell
me and I'll fucking do it.
Especially if we have a GIF, send me a timestamp and be like, Turkey, make a GIF out of this.
And I fucking got you, fam, because guess what?
Grouch House has GIFs everywhere.
You can go on your phone right now, on your phone, when you're texting somebody, you can
click on GIF, go to search and type in the Grouch Couch with no spaces and all of our
gifts are there.
Send them to your mom.
I don't care.
You can do that.
We have the fucking power, dude.
All right.
Grouch Couch with no spaces, everybody.
Okay, so we're going to do us a fucking.
Hello one and all welcome back to another episode of Love, Death and Dies.
I'm your lovely humble dungeon master Turk.
Tonight we're here.
The fucking finale.
Cheers everybody.
Thank you so much for joining us tonight and the celebration of the end of our story and
the end of these we're sending off these here characters.
Obviously it's not the end of them.
Not forever.
We do have plans of maybe bringing them back for a follow up campaign.
But for now, the story ends tonight.
Thank you all so much for joining us.
Cheers to all of you.
Thank you so much for being here.
Cheers me.
And to answer your question, Frog Toys, can Raz have children?
Because I'd be creating.
Of course I can have children.
I'm not against creating life.
The greatest part about it is that it ends.
Anthony.
What?
Don't worry about it.
Okay, sounds good.
All right, here we go, everybody.
Here we go.
The dimensions for your configured foreground have been fucked up.
Here we have it.
Our lovely map.
What is that back there?
That isn't that.
What is that?
What is that there?
What is that?
Give me just a sec while I figure this here out.
What is this?
What is this over here?
Huh?
Oh, why is it up there twice?
Oh, because it's display.
Gotcha.
Okay.
Yes, you three can see your characters.
You see what you've got there.
Now everybody, it's time.
Where is the fun story music?
Do I have it still?
One last time, everybody.
You look forward to see a 20 foot high, 20 foot wide stone corridor that ends before double
adamantian doors bearing runes all across it.
The doors as you look neither have hinges nor handles.
There is writing on it in a foreign language.
T357, you know foreign languages pretty well.
Please, roll me a wisdom check.
It's going to be an easy roll, so you only got to beat a 13.
Oh no.
That's an 11.
But I do have advantage.
You do?
Roll that shit.
Let's go.
Got the same thing.
Hit it again.
That's a glitch.
Hit it.
Re-roll.
Oh hey, you got to re-roll.
That's advantage.
And I'm just going to be nice and say, there we go.
There we go.
You look at these runes.
You can see that these runes, you know them as being dwarves runes.
The writing on the door is in dwarven and it says the three keys, bring them forth.
Well, it looks like it's time to present our keys.
I look down to Nim and tell them it's time to approach the door.
Your purpose is now.
So you're getting a little crackly again there.
Again?
Yeah.
Motherfucker.
You're still legible, but you're going to have to talk slow for us, but you're still
legible.
You look down at Nim and he signs to you.
He says, what's going to happen after this?
I'm not quite sure.
Oh good point.
Hold on.
I'm going to summon a clone.
All right.
Or attempt to.
Ah, damn it.
You try to summon and Nim looks up at you and he says, okay, well thank you for your
guidance.
He signs to you and he says, thank you for teaching me the way of war.
Forged.
I hope you do this more, no matter what happens.
Excellent.
Now the other two keys.
As Nim steps forward, you can see one of the runes on the door lights up.
I'm going to approach the door in awe and amazement.
I'm going to dig in my ear and pull out the hair gift that Ursula gave me and present
it to the door.
The other rune lights up.
I'm going to put on the dragon scale because I don't have it.
I do.
But as any artificial intelligence as well, I might count as another key and not the way
that I'm just going to give you the scale.
Smart.
Well, fuck that.
I don't want to die if it like explodes or something.
I'm a god.
I can't.
Give me the fucking dragon scale.
No.
I'm seven in a clone.
Clone.
Clone powers go.
You already failed.
You snatched that shit out of his hand.
You snatch it out of his hand, and you hold up the hair and the scale in both your hands
and the third rune lights up.
And then the runes begin to spin.
And as they spin, the things in your fucking shit.
Oh, thank you, certifiable for the dick.
As they begin to spin, the three things, the things in your hands begin to evaporate in
this mist.
And Nim looks over at you, T357, and he signs goodbye.
And then he also begins to evaporate.
Wait, wait.
As he fades away, can I just like sign this to him?
As it goes.
He looks at you and he goes.
And then he fades away and evaporates into the doors.
The runes spin, the door slowly begins to slide open.
The doors part, sliding back inside of the walls.
In front of you, you three see a vast chamber.
Which I'm going to bring you all into.
Here we go.
A vast chamber.
There you go.
Now don't move around too much.
But in front of you, you see a vast chamber.
There are three, what seem to be age-worn columns supporting crumbling stone bridges
up ahead, like up above you.
About 60 feet up ahead.
Set into alcoves are doors.
There are about 12 set of doors.
There are three sets of, or six sets of two.
Wanted to make these maps.
This is downloaded from the internet.
I didn't make none of these maps.
As you guys begin walking around, you can see that each one of these doors are iron
doors.
That are double sets of doors.
T357, you can see each one of the doors have dwarven words on them.
Strength and ease.
Just kind of like inspirational quotes.
But they don't look like they were made into the doors specifically.
But it looks like as if people, dwarves that were here for a long time were just scribbling
on the walls.
Can I do a wisdom roll to see if I can see behind the doors?
You fucking damn sure can.
Roll it for me with your magical eyeball.
Let's do it.
Hey.
It's a 17.
Which door are you going to look behind?
I was just going to, because it said walls and doors, I was just going to do a preliminary
scan to see what was most interesting.
Okay, alright.
So 2357 then.
Very smart, very cool.
You start looking through all these doors.
And the ones that have scribbles all over them, you quickly realize the doors are false
doors.
Almost all of them open to block walls.
They go nowhere.
But it seems at the very back end, the back left of this vast open chamber, there are
two doors that actually lead somewhere.
That skips that whole encounter.
Thanks magical eyeball.
That's it.
Couch coin.
Hey, for using them items, you get a couch coin.
That's right.
T357.
That's right.
Thank you, Sir.
Thank you.
All right.
It's the first time that's worked all season.
Right.
Approaching these doors.
T357, you can read on the door.
It basically, in a dwarven language, says only dwarves allowed.
Interesting.
Can I put on my necklace of changeling?
Yes, you can.
And be a dwarf.
I think in the necklace of changeling doesn't require any kind of check, right?
You just do it?
No.
Yeah.
All right.
So you put on this necklace.
And as you put it on, you think dwarf and you begin to slowly shrink.
And your face kind of hurts because you slowly begin to sprout a beard.
This is actually physically kind of happening, magically.
Like sprouting a beard.
And even your voice changes a little bit.
I am very soft.
When you start talking, you hear your voice out of your head.
Doesn't sound like your voice.
Doesn't even sound robotic.
It sounds dwarven.
I am very soft.
It sounded like AI for some reason.
That was wild.
But you are short and small.
And then you reach out your hand to the door and it just opens.
You just open it.
What did you want to do in this moment, Raz?
Oh, I was going to try to create a clone again.
You still want to?
Yeah, I do.
Ah, 14 plus three.
17.
That's a success.
Since we're doing preparation spells at the moment, I'm going to go ahead and cast spell
Nova to just kind of get my spells ready.
Do you have to make a roll to cast spell Nova or it just happens?
No, it's when I go to cast my spell.
My next spell gets critical.
If not, then it fizzles and then I'm kind of like mana blocked for a turn.
Okay.
Landlocked.
Did you just fusion Ha yourself?
Yeah.
Dude, you can't just split yourself.
Why can't you whack it on stream like that, dude?
Fusion Ha.
And now I'm free to move your tokens forward.
Steph!
Hi, Steph!
Hello.
Hi Steph.
Is one of these doors more interesting than the other?
No.
They bought the same.
No, it's the same room.
Oh, how industrious.
This is what a dwarf sounds like.
Oh, industrial.
Same room.
I'm still test.
I'm just no longer a robot.
Now, this hall you guys step into has the following features.
As you step inside, at the south end of the chamber, you can see what looks to be a staircase
that climbs up about 70 feet.
It's a very large staircase.
And to the north, there is a huge painting, a fresco, if you will, a very olden painting.
A couple of different dwarfs that are standing on steeds and they're around a big old pile
of gold.
As you get closer, see both of you guys staring at this thing.
Make me a wisdom save as you're looking at this fresco, this painting.
All of us?
Yes, everyone that looks at it.
Okay, baby, that's a 16.
Nice.
The only thing I want to know about this painting is if it's worth any money.
It's painted into the walls.
It's not like a painting.
It's like a wall.
So no.
But since you failed, you kind of become charmed by this painting.
The both of you.
You can't look away from it.
You love the look of it.
You love the dwarfs on this painting.
And both of you get closer to it.
If Bomblin not passed, Bomblin got a 16.
And Bomblin passed.
So you, Raz, 2357, are just staring at this painting, just like completely in love with
it.
You become so endowed and in love with this painting.
You just sit in front of it and just start staring at it, leaving Bomblin standing by
himself walking back and forth.
It's kind of more like this.
Bomblin, while they're charmed by this painting, what do you do?
Damn it.
I was on mute.
I didn't hear anything.
Um, are both Raz's charmed by this?
Yes.
Okay.
Ah, they are charmed by a painting?
Can I, can I Strength Check pick them both up and then just try to like drag them away
from it?
You can Strength Check try to move them away, but it's going to be a contested Strength
Check because they don't want to move away from it.
So they're going to roll Strength and you roll Strength.
And if you get higher, you drag them away.
Now here's the thing.
I still have my eyes.
Oh, get up.
25.
Get wrecked.
Yes.
So would I still be charmed by it knowing that it's magic?
You know that it's magic, but you were charmed by it before you could even think about anything
else.
You looked right at it and were just charmed right away.
Yeah.
You had no, there was no reaction there.
Bomblin got it.
What'd you get Bomblin?
I got a 25.
Nice.
I'm going to steal.
I'm going to steal my friends.
Nice.
Only Strength.
That's an eight.
Nice.
You as well Raz.
Go ahead.
One time we won.
I guess twice because you also need to roll for the clone now.
No, I have no idea which one's which.
So I'm just kind of gambling on picking up one of them.
Ha.
They both fail.
I still beat you guys.
You dragged them away from the painting.
Now you guys have this sense of loss as you're being pulled away from the painting and you're
sad.
Everything and you just, you just want to stay there so bad and look at this painting
because of how beautiful it is.
And as Bomblin's pulling you away from it, you feel mad at him, like angry because he's
taking this thing away from you.
But he drags you all the way to the stairs.
And once you get there, the charm is broken.
But on the inside, deep down, you still feel kind of like you want to go back and you want
to look at that painting again, at least for one more minute.
But he does drag you away to the stairs.
There you go.
Mad at Bomblin.
So normal.
Yes.
Don't even understand art.
Oh, and you still look like a dwarf.
Yeah, that's what it do with art.
It has to do with the fact that we can't steal a fucking wall, guys.
It's not profitable.
Makes no sense.
OK, these stairs in front of you lead up about 70 feet.
They go for a while, but they're all just complete stone stairs.
All right, not everybody at once.
Jesus Christ.
I'll go first.
All right.
Well, we've already been making our way up.
Yeah, I would just say that, Connor.
Here's everybody make your way.
Maybe the last make your way of this campaign.
Cheers.
I would like to take this moment to say making your way, everybody downtown walking fast
faces passing them homebound.
Cheers, y'all.
And I miss you.
And I need you.
All right, you get up to the top of this.
But now you're gone.
Pause.
Play.
Hi, what's up, Bam?
Hey, y'all.
Shout out to Bam, y'all.
Thanks for coming for finale tonight, buddy.
Thank you so much for being here.
Thank you.
Shout out to our y'all.
If you're following him yet, you fucking should because they're good friends of ours and they're
just wonderful folks.
So get over there and follow them.
Yes.
All right, y'all.
Here's what happens next.
Oh, I'm going to do music again.
Ready?
As you step up the top of the stairs, this 20 foot high hall you look across has three
pillars running the length of the hall.
They're curved to resemble giant war hammers with the square heads pressed tightly against
the floor.
You can see the wall on the west has a huge crack in it.
It's a cracked mosaic that depicts a dwarf Smith at a forge crafting other dwarves out
of black metal and diamonds.
You can see three archways and the east wall, but in front of them, crumbling bridges and
these crumbling bridges.
You look down below to see the floor that you just came from about 70 feet down.
Yes.
Y'all moving around like crazy.
What do you do?
Yeah, we're trying to explore the area.
It might be a little bit.
It's better.
Yes.
Well, I think the one that I'm on has the shortest way to jump.
Could be.
They all jumped.
They're all crumbling.
Yes.
With the 70 foot fall.
Well, clone, it's your time to shine.
Okay.
I'm gonna I'm gonna send my clone to jump across.
All right.
Um, he runs.
Don't ahead.
Make me a dexterity.
We're gonna do acrobatics.
Is this dexterity?
Dexterity check.
As he runs to jump across.
It says I'm colliding with something.
We're all trapped right there.
Oh, yeah.
There's like a wall or some some kind of something like that.
There you go.
Aha.
I don't know why it's there's a wall there.
All right.
Go clone.
Go.
Damn it.
Clone.
The third.
How far does he make it?
What's your decks?
Plus one.
Five plus one.
He makes it like 10 feet out and then just falls all the way down the 70 feet and splats
at the first floor.
And he's like.
Lord of Death, take me.
I wouldn't say that.
Say peace out, bitches.
And then splat.
There you go.
All right.
We ride it down.
Who's the plus one?
You said you said he got 10 feet out.
Yeah.
With his failed check.
Yeah.
Can I open a portal at that 10 feet where he got to?
You can try.
But I will say I want you to roll it.
It's going to be a hard roll, which means you've got to be to 16 as you roll this and
you're trying to open your portal.
You can feel inside of this vault portal magic seems to be a little bit more difficult.
What?
What the hell is happening that many times?
I swear I clicked it once.
That's crazy.
All right.
Well, roll it now, but you're going to have to be the 19 and you can feel it's harder
to open it.
Your portal inside of the vault, like you can feel it's a little bit harder.
Ha ha.
It's very hard.
Yeah, very hard.
That's a five.
What I will also say, so back on that other platform, you are you got to reroll.
Nice.
There's a huge cracked mosaic of that stone dwarf.
There is also more pathways and more statues further down the hallway.
But want to keep going this way?
We can.
Who would like to go next?
Who wants to do 21?
Oh, you got a 21 on his reroll.
OK.
Is this this is for the portal, right?
Yeah.
So there's a portal open in the gap.
So whatever that distance is, you said 10 feet, he just fell.
Yeah.
So now it looks like.
Another 10 feet.
Right.
Are these five by five squares?
Yeah.
Oh, they're five by five.
So then my portal opens like right on the other side almost then.
Yeah.
You can open it on the other side because you can see there.
Yeah.
About, you know, here someplace.
Yeah, that's cool.
All right.
Because it's where I've been.
Oh, is your portal remained open?
It's only where he's been.
I forgot.
It's the fucking moonstones that do sight, right?
So yeah, it's only where you've been.
So I'm going to put it like right on the edge there.
It's all coming together.
That's it.
That's actually a smart move to do that.
Then what you did, that's very smart.
That's why I did it.
That's why.
So if you jump through your portal like a little hop, you'll be able to make
it to the other side.
Easy.
Okay, cool.
I'm going to jump through my portal.
Nice.
You make it to the other side where there is a door.
But now first, Bomblin, T357.
Is there anything you guys want to do before you go over this archway?
Can we also jump through his portal?
Yeah, absolutely.
Absolutely.
As long as I have it open for my friend.
Can I actually, before I jump, can I attempt another wisdom roll with my eye?
Yeah, for sure.
What are you looking at?
Just to see what's ahead.
Ahead at the doors.
Yeah.
That's a 15.
15.
All right.
You fail.
Your eye fizzles.
Fair enough.
I'm just going to hop on through then.
All right.
Bomblin?
Yeah, I'm just going to go through the portal.
I'll try to.
You get to the door.
Too much.
This door is made of iron.
It's about six feet tall, three feet across, a normal looking door.
It's got some dwarven scribbles on it, but nothing of interest.
I'm assuming Raz, you're there first.
You just open the door.
Yeah.
Plus one is 20 minute cool down.
Oh, shit.
Why?
What?
Why has no one told me this?
We're going to have to fire our manager, Terky.
I know, right?
It's unbelievable.
Jesus.
How are we going to let the people help with only 20 minutes?
That's a long time.
That's like nine helps in one string.
That's it.
I know.
Here we go.
I fix.
I fix now.
Huh?
Oh, does it really?
Well, it doesn't anymore.
I don't know what old Terky was thinking.
20 minutes.
That's crazy.
All right.
Damn you, past Terky.
You open the door.
Woo, we ride it down.
Hold on.
Before you open the door.
Here's what T357 sees on the inside.
You can see to the door.
This room is the following features.
It looks like something like a 10 foot tall painted statue of an armored male dwarf wielding a battle axe and wearing a mask.
He stands at the back of this 20 foot high room.
And that's it.
All you can see.
Interesting.
Interdasting.
It's a nice to hold up.
It seems I was going to open up this door.
Unless anybody's got anything to say about it.
There's just a statue of a dwarf on the inside.
Holding an axe.
Oh, seems safe enough.
Like a like a lootable axe.
Possibly.
Okay.
Traps.
Hopefully.
Okay, whatever. Let's get in there.
All right. Go ahead. Open it.
Go ahead. Step on in.
You can do it.
Hiya.
I'm colliding with walls. Hiya.
Okay.
There you go.
Yeah, you guys step in.
It's just it looks like a statue.
But as you step inside, each one of you go ahead just very quickly, you know, just just make me an intelligence check real quick.
And as you get to do this and you succeed.
So you look back in your mind of things you've studied things you've learned over the years being a warforged and you see this statue and recognize it as the statue of a depiction of Gorham Gorsen.
He is the dwarven god of vigilance, also known as fire eyes.
You can see that the statue, it meld seamlessly with the floor.
It's like stuck in there.
Yes, and the axe that he wields seems as you get closer with your your religion check.
It seems as if.
Hold on, hold on, hold your fucking horses.
Where is it?
Ah.
It seems as if the axe can be lifted away from where it rests. That's all I was looking for. I've got the rest here.
Well, cool. Looks like you can take that thing. I don't need it. I got to my, you know, my my unaliving stick already.
So fantastic.
I would like to steal it.
Okay.
Lift it from its pedestal as you walk up while T357's inspectors.
On res. Soil his drawers. Nice. You look like you sold your drawers.
Oh, no, I shit myself. Oh, no, you shit yourself.
You lift it from the statue.
And when it's removed, it leaves the indentation of where it should have been left.
As you turn it around, you can see on the other side of the axe that was facing the statue.
There's Dwarves runes that are speaking that are written in Dwarves.
As you cannot read.
No, I can't.
Hey, guys, what is this?
Let me see. You read it.
Let hearts be lifted in battles be one.
What it says.
Oh, that's nice. Yeah.
I am T357 human side relations.
It's so funny you saying that like as a dwarf standing there with like a beard.
I just imagine you, but you just got like this orange beard coming out of your face.
You're shorter.
Yes, the axe says that.
But you think for a second, and both of you realize that on the painting earlier in this area on the other side of the bridge, the dwarf that you barely glanced at was a place in the in the painting, perfectly shaped like this act.
But as you think that on the floor.
You can see you look down, you step off the statue and you look down and you see one of the squares is made of adamant and metal, the rest of it is made of stone.
Is this a trap.
That feels like a trap.
You know what we say.
Oh yeah, you should definitely throw a clone at it.
Hold on.
Let me get out of the room.
Damn it won't let me leave me.
Damn it.
There you go.
Okay.
Yeah, you tried to say we've learned that this motherfucker will suicide Bob himself.
It's not we're not being in that room.
Okay, well close the door then.
You shut the door. You want to try and summon it again there as.
You know, I'm just going to.
Okay, yeah, sure.
All right, fuck it.
Shadow clone Jutsu is not working.
It's time for suicide bomber Jutsu.
Okay, go ahead.
When did the guys become okay.
You don't have to make a roll for this.
You just explode.
That's literally what's happening.
Last episode, you explode, Romy damage.
For your explosion.
Go ahead, Romy damage.
Hey, nice.
As you explode.
The metal on the floor does nothing, but as you explode you see your explosion touch the metal of the floor and then from the statue springs forth out of the statues eyes fire.
It goes right at you. I need you to make me a defense.
Dammit.
You succeed you jump out of the way as fire comes out and hits the door right where the other two are standing on the other side.
Powerful magic.
You got advantage.
You don't need it.
Put that shit in your pocket.
You don't need it later.
Put it in my pocket.
Yeah, save it.
Lock it.
Put it in my pocket.
Yeah, then you open the door.
And it's just like smoke.
All right, the trap came from the statue.
It shot out fire.
It's a good thing we didn't step on that bitch.
Cool.
Great.
All right.
I know where to get more elementium if I need an upgrade.
That's right.
All over this fucking vault.
You leave this room and you guys hop back through the portal back to the other side of the bridge.
There's nothing left over here.
Yeah, now, Boblin, you are holding this axe.
I'm gonna leave you guys because there's a fucking invisible wall there.
Well, you want to see if that X fits in the mosaic.
We want to go all the way back downstairs.
We still got two more bridges.
Yeah, we got bridges in this room.
Speaking of those bridges, it's in this room, correct?
It's a mosaic in this room.
Boblin just didn't.
Yeah, it's in this room.
Oh, I thought about, see, I was confused with the inventing painting.
That's what I thought you were talking about.
See, this is what happens when you have a lot of make-believe wall decor in your dungeons.
Yeah, I didn't like this.
I didn't make this.
Do you want to try that or do you want to go over another bridge?
Are there other places on the mosaic that look like they have inlays?
No.
Just the axe?
I'd say give it a go.
All right, I'll just, I'll set the axe in the inlay.
Nice.
You do that.
As you set the axe in the inlay, I'm going to do music again because badass.
Set the axe in the inlay.
The dwarf turns to look at you almost as if magically and then takes the axe.
It forms back into the painting and he swings it and slams it down on the anvil.
And as he does, the painting splits.
Revealing a secret room.
This dust-filled room, as you can see in front of you, has lain untouched since the time of the Delzuine dwarves.
You can see green copper burns on platforms that overflow with coins and gems and more.
Right here in front of you.
Wow.
Ooh.
Bubbler's just going to start filling his pockets.
Okay.
This room holds five copper urns.
The urns themselves are worth 25 gold pieces, but they do take up an inventory slot.
Each urn contains five tourmalines, which are like, you know, dual dwarven things that are worth 100 gold.
And mixed inside of them is 200 copper pieces.
One of the urns is you stick your hand in, Bamblin, you start feeling warm and you pull your hand out and on your hand is a ring.
It's a ring of warmth that you pull out.
And this ring of warmth, while wearing this ring, you have resistance to cold damage.
In addition, everything that you wear and carry is unharmed by temperature.
Oh.
Yes.
And the third urn has 250 gold pieces in it and 33 blue quartz gemstones that are worth about 10 gold apiece.
I'm going to copy and paste this into our chat so you all can have it for later.
You don't have to do all that stuff.
But it's straight up a treasure room.
Yes.
Can I try something?
Sure.
I'm going to go to one of the copper pots that we've emptied out and then go to Tess and be like, do you think you can turn this into something else?
With your sifter of crazy things?
Maybe.
Let's give it a go.
Do I need to take off my necklace for this?
Wait, aren't you still a dwarf?
Yeah.
You can't.
I'm taking off the necklace.
You can't open your fleshy side.
You're going to have to take off the necklace.
You're going to have to carefully sing on an urn.
As you take off the necklace, your beard just disappears like in smoke and then you regrow your height.
It's like Martha Stewart in South Park eating a turkey.
Yeah.
Put it in your sifter of many things and roll me one d20.
Let's go.
Three.
You put it in there and then you open it.
And instead of it being a nice jade urn, it's now a clay urn.
Oh, really?
You suck.
I'm just going to throw it on the ground and then turn around and go out.
To be fair, you never know what's going to go in and happen because it doesn't require a roll.
It just becomes other things.
I'm going to create another clone.
All right, roll me magic.
This one has advantage.
It does.
Two.
I rolled three.
Sorry.
Ignore that last one.
It's just a 16.
It is.
So you succeed and you create a clone.
I'm going to send the cops out of the darkness.
Hey.
Oh, shit.
Where is it?
Right here.
What?
Hiya.
Hello.
Clone boys, once again.
Once again.
All right.
You guys leave the secret room.
Now you have two bridges that you cross here.
Yeah.
You bet your sweet boobie I do.
All right.
I'm going to send my clone across the middle bridge and he's going to jump as far as he
can.
All right.
This is a hard roll.
Got to be the 19.
Run it.
I don't think a clone could fit in this.
It's a 15.
15.
He runs and he jumps.
He gets about halfway and then he falls to his death.
What does he say as he falls to his death, Raz?
Shit.
That's what he says.
Oh, shit.
And he falls.
Flats on the ground.
All right.
So now what I want to do is I want to open up a portal.
Right, as to the furthest point that he got to.
Okay.
About halfway.
So you still have to jump.
Might make it easier, but you still have to jump.
And it's going to be a hard roll to open a portal inside the vault.
That's a 21.
You succeed and your portal opens hovering in the middle.
All right.
Now what I'd like to do.
Um, shit.
Well, you think.
Bomblin, what do you do?
I'm going to jump across this bridge.
All right.
Roll me dexterity.
I got.
That's an eight.
Fucking plus one as a nine.
All right.
You jump across.
We roll.
And, uh, okay.
Thank you.
So.
Two more.
Ah, you just jumped.
You fall down to the bottom.
Um, 70 feet.
You fall down to the bottom.
You take 14 damage.
Magic.
Oh, you're going to.
Conscious.
Oh, thank God.
Thank God.
You jump and you almost miss and you all make me.
Feet stumble and then you smash on the other side.
Ah.
Yeah.
With nothing.
I'm wondering if you'll let me do this.
All right.
What do you got?
Hold on.
I have an idea.
What?
Uh, could I drink my dragon potion?
Yes.
Cause that's sprouts wings.
Correct.
Yes.
So I would like to become a.
Lightning dragon.
When I transformed.
I would like to pick up.
Rats.
And place him on.
Each of the other sides.
So he can form portals from them.
Hell yeah.
If you can just fly and carry them, there's no need for the portals anymore.
I love, I love the effort though.
If you want.
Give me the option to go wherever the fuck I want, please.
I didn't know how long it lasted.
So.
I figured I would still place him so we could jump back afterwards.
I'd say at least an hour.
Um, and now you have the ability to fly and you can do a lightning breath attack that
deals magic damage.
So pretty sick.
Pretty sick.
Oh my God.
Yeah.
And from your back, I'm honestly thinking you're a war forged and it's an electric
dragon, which is beautiful.
I'm honestly thinking you sprout robotic.
Fucking wings.
They're like, you know what I mean?
They're made out of metal and you begin to just like, they do.
They do.
There you go.
That's what happens.
And you just ship this dragon.
You just throw it out, like transforms and you grow like arms.
You're like, but it's all made out of metal.
And then you begin to float and you grab razz by your, your talents and you just carry
him around and then you guys float back down and you could place your token wherever you
want to end your landing at.
Hell yeah.
Well, for now I will just say across the bridge.
Yeah.
And then, and then I'll open up a portal to where Bomblin is on the ground.
He's not.
Yeah.
Yeah, yeah, you didn't.
Yeah.
Yeah, he's fine.
He's fine.
Yeah.
Oh yeah.
Yeah.
Why is he down there though?
Because he then went to the other bridge.
Oh, they went to the other one.
Yeah.
But if you couldn't fight, I can even fly him across there, so you can make a portal for
him.
Well, I can't.
We're going to say you did.
Okay.
Okay. Who's going first? Bomblin's going first. Very nice. Very nice. Very nice.
All right. That is. That's it. Yeah. As you open it up, this adamantian door this time
to this door, you try to hold on. Let me see. What? Yeah, yeah. God, just screen up there.
Now you got it. You got it. Wait, we're holding on. What? You tried to open the door, Bomblin,
but it doesn't work. You see on the door, there's more dwarven writing. That you cannot
read. I'll slap my ass over there. You fly your ass over there and once you get there,
you read on the door, only dwarves may enter. Can I be a dwarf dragon if I put my necklace
poison, but I have a necklace. I think you absolutely could, but if you decide
to go dwarf, you will lose your breath attack, which will keep your wings.
That's fine. That's fine. Okay. You put on your necklace and now you are a warforged
lightning dragon dwarf and you just shift and you're now you have a beard. You transform
once again. And you are right. So pick a leg. You can't be a robot, a dragon and a dwarf.
That's not fair. Listen, I got all of my memories and all of my powers back yesterday. I'm OP
now, motherfuckers. There you go. There was transformers and
intoxicants. I'm everything. The door swings open. You can see to the north and the east
of this 20 foot high room, they are adorned with dust covered paintings depicting dwarf
smiths at work at their forges. You can see an iron anvil sits atop a raised stone block
in the middle of the floor. Both fixtures are draped in cobwebs.
Well, can I go into my room? Yes. Well, they decide what they want.
Does it also say only dwarves may enter? I would love if it did. Let me see. Let me
see. Nope. But this is an adamantium door, similar to the one that you opened before
when you swing it open. As it opens on the inside, Raz, you see four suits of rusted
plate armor, helmets sized for dwarves. They're all in the corners of this 20 foot room. Each
of the things have dwarvish runes carved into the far wall of this area. And you can see
a nether dwarven saying scribbled onto the wall above the dwarven rune.
Can I can I make a wisdom to see if I remember any of this? Sure. Go ahead.
Hiya. I will give it to you. I'll call this a religion check. It identifies the painting
as the dwarven god of secrets. And you can see on the wall, the inscription reads in
dwarvish. And you know this because it is a saying of the god of secrets. It says a
secret never before told will part Duma Thrawn's lips.
Well, now, with your religion check, I'm almost wondering if I just want to give this to you.
And I feel like I do. How much do you think Raz has studied other religion? Not even for
a second. Well, that's up to Raz.
I wouldn't say very much, but you got to you got to think I'm in the business of converting
people from religions. So like, I have to know a little bit about what's going on on
their side before I convince them to come over and join me. Okay. Hmm. I don't know
if a little bit will do it. So for now, come back over to Bomblin 3357. What are you guys
doing over here in this room? There's a big old anvil in the center.
Look at this anvil over here. Yeah. Very curious. Wrong way. What's going on with this anvil
over here? Natural 28, you inspect the paintings on the wall, Bomblin. And notice right away,
being that you've already done this previously, that the Smith in the painting on the south
wall has a hammer that can be taken away from the south wall. It's just laying inside of
it. And there's another dwarven saying on the wall in T357. You approach him, you read
it and it says, let hearts be lifted and battles be won once again.
Said there's a hammer in the painting in the wall of the painting. You have to reach into
the wall. Cheers. The
I don't know if I can pull that hammer out.
I'm scared, I'm just rolling down. I don't know what's going on.
Dude, this is scary. I can't, man.
There's no reason to roll.
This is like childhood trauma right here.
Straightforward question. Do you take the hammer out of the wall?
I'm very concerned, but yes. Slowly.
Yes. You pull the hammer out of the wall
and turn and look at the anvil in front of you.
Yes.
Huh?
I look at the anvil.
Yes.
Holding the hammer. Yes.
What do you do?
I guess this is one of those moments where you go over to the anvil
and strike something.
Hmm.
I'm going to whip out my bone sword, extend it,
and then I'm going to strike my sword, bone sword, with the hammer on the anvil.
Okay. Nothing happens to your sword.
But as you strike the hammer down on the anvil, ping!
Everything rings out.
Dust falls from the ceiling.
And both of you feel yourselves standing in this room, you two,
feel yourselves getting a little bit healthier.
This anvil that was struck gives both of you 10 temporary hit points
that last for 24 hours.
That put us up to two hearts.
Yes, technically.
You're at 25 and Bombman's at 20.
But nothing happens to your bone sword.
It was just kind of in the mix there.
Yeah, okay.
Yeah.
All right.
You two leave this room.
I'm going to pocket this hammer though. This is my hammer.
All right. Dwarven hammer.
And you fly across back where Raz is.
And what I will say, T357, as you guys are standing here,
he tells you, he kind of fills you in a little bit.
Yes, but it's like on the stairs, there's like this stone on top of it.
So you can't go down there.
And he tells you, he fills you in on what he just seen with the Dwarven God of Secrets, et cetera,
and tells you the thing.
And you know back in your memory, the Dwarven God of Secrets,
the only way to move forward,
what you can figure is for one of you as a character who tell a secret aloud,
something that has never been revealed about yourselves before.
And if the Dwarven God of Secrets deems it worthy,
the door will open.
Now, is it revealing to each other or just hasn't been revealed on the show?
To each other even. I get a little bit of both.
I know what can be revealed.
That would have been funny, certifiable.
That would have been funny.
All right, go ahead. What do you got?
I am not truly a Warforged.
I am an autonome that was designed to look like a Warforged in order to assassinate the king.
That's pretty cool.
Cool.
That's well, I was a childhood companion to Schemo
and was repurposed and ripped away from my original purpose to do murder.
Cool.
A new person sits on the couch.
Who's this then?
Vision Hayes. Welcome here, friend.
I don't know if that was good enough.
Why don't you roll me a D20 real quick.
D357. Go ahead.
Teleformer.
That's a 16.
Oh, damn fine.
Not what I meant to do at all.
Yo, where's the corvette?
The stone shifts away from the stairs.
Revealing the stairs that go deep down, dark, deep down.
Oh.
It's dusty in here.
Please.
You three stand there.
Not for long. Let's go.
Right.
Going down the stairs.
Hallway.
Don't move too far.
Because.
Although deep underground, this vault seems to be hit by beams of sunlight.
It pour down from the ceiling, catching moats of dust in the air and luminous poof.
Ornate columns you can see.
Support a 30 foot high vaulted ceiling, which is adorned with carving.
Dwarves basking in the presence of their gods.
Deep alcoves line the walls.
And piled in one of them.
Seems to be a golden road.
See, corner of your eye.
But out of the dusty gloom steps.
Steps an aged dwarf.
Touching a staff in his hand that is carved and painted to resemble a pair of intertwined dragons.
One red, one gold.
Despite the dwarves age, his eyes are steady and bright.
He looks at you three and says,
I wasn't expecting anyone.
As you can see, the place is a mess.
Perhaps you should come back later.
That's what we're going to.
Okay.
All right.
We're going to take five minute break, everybody, and we're going to come right back and we're going to come back for the last hour.
And you know,
this has been a blast.
I'm just very excited to reveal some things to you guys here in a minute.
So thank you for being a part of the story.
Thank you for being here.
Thank you so much for being here for the fucking finale.
It's been a hundred years since that vault's done there been open.
All right. We'll be right back, everybody.
Use the bathroom, fill up your flagons and drain your dragons.
You know, whenever you write a letter to a cemetery caretaker, you should always write, tomb in my concern.
I'm going to be a good guy.
Oh, hey there.
Almost didn't see you there.
Boy, do I love my days off.
I tell you what, you can look as good as I do on your days off.
By just going and getting some sweet, sweet GC merch.
That's right.
And then you can you can almost look as good as I do.
What's up, nerds?
I'm going to be a good guy.
I love to see it.
Yes, I would like to order my companions to large cups of me and error, error, error.
Penguins have a clear above their eye that converts sea water into fresh water.
I don't even have to ask him a question.
You just bring up like watch, watch this.
You see, the crazy thing about death is when you die, you're dead and you can't come back to life.
And that's the greatest part about it.
You see, death is a complicated subject for most people because they fear it.
But the thing is, you.
Death is coming for you.
And that's where we get crashing out of the dungeon again.
And then this group shows up, says that sorry, we're late.
We're the side questers.
What a fucking joke.
Did you know as the fourth player of our campaign, you can affect the stream by using channel points and commands such as give a dice, which allows us to read.
Roll also chaos cards when clipped, they can either hinder or help our roles as well as give us random loot or prank call someone.
You can also join factions that give you special abilities for helping or hindering your favorite characters.
So join a faction and use commands in chat today.
Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha.
So you're telling me you want me to hold on all the monies for the new churches.
Okay.
Yeah, I don't like this.
I don't think that bright is going to be able to say this.
I believe I have something that could stand our enemies.
You may want to block your ears.
God, let's do it.
Yeah, I would like to place all my money's on catapult.
Yeah.
Oh, hello.
Oh, hi.
Hello there.
To see you there.
Hello, everyone.
Welcome back to the final act of Love, Death and Dice, the Dragon Vault right here on the finale.
Thank you so much for being here with us through the course of this story and freaks a part of the couch.
Oh, thank you so much for the support.
Fuck 38 months.
Thank you.
Appreciate it.
Thank you all so much for being here over the course of this story tonight, of course, is our finale.
Once we finish off this story here, we have some preparations to do that we will be coming back in.
Of course, with Love, Death and Dice will be coming back here last week of January.
Make sure to keep an eye out for that.
We have some other streams we will be doing over the course of the next month after this finale.
So including nerd trivia, adventure doodles and other kinds of stuff.
So have no fear.
We're not disappearing.
But thank you all so much for joining us.
Being here and being fucking awesome.
When we last left, for the sake of time, we have a lot to get through.
These three adventurers step down into the final floor of the Dragon Vault, going through its numerous random riddles and puzzles
over old bridges and doing things with old dwarven axes, eventually to reach the bottom.
Oh, and before I continue again, you guys want to go up or do you want to go down?
I think I read a little bit to her.
And I was just with my eye to see which way we go.
Wait, where's the dude?
Kind of the same. Exactly.
When to go up or do you want to go down?
Thank you for being a lot of things.
Thank you.
Appreciate your decision.
I would go down.
I like to go down.
I guess go down.
Down to the corner.
Who doesn't like to go down?
As I explained, a dwarf approaches you out of the dusty gloom steps of very aged dwarf, but his eyes still look very piercing.
And he looks at you guys.
I wasn't expecting anyone.
But as you can see, the place is a mess.
Perhaps you should come back.
Get out of here.
And he's holding this golden in late staff.
Someone's getting a card.
You haven't had one yet.
Can I summon one of my clones?
You gain one D12 temporary hit points.
Only one D12 you gain nine more temporary hit points.
You get a total of 30 until they get depleted.
That's all I've been strength.
Not right now.
Raz, you're what do you say to this?
Unless you just want to try to cast magic right in front of them.
Oh, well, we we are just here.
Looking for stuff.
Guy.
Okay.
Who is it that sent you?
Me.
Me is who sent me.
And I am God.
I mean, really, the entire city is looking for this place.
The entire realms been looking for this place.
We didn't tell anybody where it is.
Just us.
This is an open secret.
Yeah.
We're the only ones that got the keys.
But if it's just you that's been since the I've been told to protect this place.
If you just came on your own accord, I suggest you just.
I'm not sure I'm going to be able to do that.
Well, we can't do that.
Why not?
Because there's some things in here that we need to take with us.
What is that?
The bear has a substantial debt.
All of it.
I will talk louder.
Appreciate that.
Oh, all of it, you say.
Well, to me, it seems you can have.
None of it.
Or the Lord never remember.
As told me to be here to protect.
This.
I'm going to go ahead and.
You're in with no one.
And no one.
So be taking any.
And I took.
What about this guy?
And then I'm going to summon.
Clone.
Okay.
But first.
What do you do, produce?
Did I take out the stone that has never, ever in it?
Yeah.
Yeah. But as you pull it out and you say that, what about this?
The stone that has never.
Has disappeared.
You realize once it gave you the information, it kind of faded out.
So he says.
Shiny rock.
Well, Lord never embers soul was residing within the rock.
And he says, well, I'm going to go ahead and.
I would like you when you say that he looks at you, cocks his head.
He looks at you.
I want you to roll me a charisma check.
Oh.
That's seven.
Here it goes. Tests charisma.
Yeah.
To begin with.
Yeah.
And he looks at you and he's like.
Why'd you go ahead and reroll that?
It's not much better.
It's an 11 now.
11 looks at you and he's like.
Well, you may be a dwarf, but I ain't never seen no crazy dragon.
Magic.
Does that mean two more times?
Yeah.
He's like, I ain't never seen no dwarf with crazy mechanical wings.
I don't believe that never remember since you.
Is if he did, why didn't he come?
Yeah, everyone's right.
So what are you going to do?
Take a step forward.
You know, make it out a lot.
At this point, Raz, do you still want to try and summon?
I'm going to try and summon.
Okay. Yeah.
Yeah.
I'm just going to say, what about this guy?
See if it works.
It doesn't.
Hooray.
You.
He's like.
I am waiting.
What guy?
Are you trying to cast magic in my vault?
Yeah.
I've been noticing it's, it's kind of hard to do that down here.
Is there a certain reason why?
Well, you see, never remember has cast a protection spell here.
No one can teleport or.
Apparate in or outside.
Huh?
Hmm.
He's like, okay.
One last chance.
Get out of here.
Leave the vault and it's goodies to me.
Or you will die.
I don't know about that one.
Listen here, honcho.
This is a, this used to be a God and I killed him.
And now I have his responsibilities.
And something in my godly brain right now is telling me that we need to move forward.
So you can either stand in the way and join my religion really fast.
Or you can move on and get the fuck out of here.
Never ever mentioned we had a dragon trap down here.
Is that resides within your staff?
Trap in the staff?
No.
He looks at you and.
Cracks his neck.
And he sets the staff down.
And then the skin breaks away.
From his arms.
And they start to get all scaly and scales rush up his neck.
And then he begins to enlarge almost 10 times the size that he was.
I dare no man to have a look about this.
I am not a dwarf.
I am an adult old dragon.
No God!
No, no, please no! No!
I am Aranax.
The golden dragon that protects the vault of Neverember.
And you will all die for trying to steal from him.
Fucking perfect timing. Everyone roll me initiative.
Hold on.
Yes.
Hold on. Shouldn't I have been able to see through that?
Yes. But you didn't try to.
No, that was just the innate ability that I can see through it.
You got to remind like, hey, I'm going to check this out.
You got to tell me.
That's a 17.
I'm also going to take off my necklace because that's it.
Put on my ring of invisibility.
Another one of Tess's famous rolls.
Thanks for bringing up the rear every time.
What did you get?
I got a 17.
Fomlin, what did you get?
Oh, I don't need to re-roll. It was initiative.
Oh, you want to take it. Trust me.
I'm going to anyway. Yeah.
He gets three.
Fomlin, what did you get?
I rolled a one.
I rolled a three.
All right, Raz.
Here go now.
Here's our app.
I'm going to.
The first thing I would like to do.
Real quick here.
I'm actually going to just get rid of the.
Lighting.
I'm going to go right there.
Right there.
Just behind this little corner.
And then.
I'm going to activate dark pact.
Which allows me to sacrifice a certain amount of my HP to add to my roll for
my spells.
Yes.
I'm going to be sacrificing a five HP.
And adding it.
To a summoning spell for my clone.
I need this guy.
So that is.
That's a 19 with all my pluses.
Okay.
Summoning.
Hey.
And I'm going to have.
I'm going to have my clone just.
Spawn to the square to my right.
And I keep them in reserve.
And I'm going to have.
I'm going to have my clone.
Spawn to the square to my right.
And I keep them in reserve.
That'll end my turn.
All right.
Fumbling.
You.
Ah.
Very scared.
I'm going to like peek around the pillar that I'm hiding behind.
And fire off my wand.
With a fire bolt.
I'm going to have to.
I'm just talking quieter.
What the deal is.
Go ahead.
So since I use spell Nova beforehand, any spell cast of the turn.
Following for this explodes.
Which would be like next step.
And then drop.
Oh, it's a spell.
Yeah.
So critical.
The ultimate.
Oh, that kind of sucks.
Yeah, it is at three.
That's kind of rough.
Double damage.
Because of my elemental eyes,
so it's a total of 10 fire damage.
I'll take the damage. Why not? Let's do it. Let's do it.
We'll take a damage. That's right.
Yeah, I'll take a damage.
That's 14. All right.
That's a 16.
16. Oh, yeah, dude.
Hell yeah.
Hell yeah, dude.
All right. And then.
This was your Minotaur hand too, by the way.
Yes. Yes.
So you swing that motherfucker around and you go,
aah, and you shoot fire at it.
It explodes and he's like,
more magic in my vault.
You stupid bear.
I know where you came from
and I know where you're going to go down into the fucking ground, you bitch.
Damn. Is that bonus action?
Can I can I toot my sweet roll whistle?
Yes, you do that.
But, dude, I know. Yeah, yeah.
You know, I know. But it's yeah, it's it's going to take a minute.
We let all the doors open.
Roll me 1d6.
That's how many rounds it'll take for sweet roll to get here.
Wow, baby, let's roll low.
One time I won a one.
And we got a two.
Two rounds starting now.
Yes. Raz gets an item.
A single use item.
Ready for single use, baby.
Oh, I hope it's a duplication item that takes no actions.
Could be could be.
Roll me 1d100.
Ah. Ah.
Ah.
20. 200.
Yeah.
20. You get a fruit basket.
15 meals.
Each meal completely nourishes 2d4 people for one day.
Congratulations.
Can we just can we just acknowledge real quick, even when I'm rolling
1d100, I'm still getting that 20s.
I will not acknowledge it.
I will not acknowledge that fucking fuck off.
How about that?
Moving on to fucking fruit basket.
All right.
We roll. Oh, man.
You don't have that.
And you could hear you can see that the dragon can hear it easily.
What what are you summoning?
But now he's 357. It's your turn.
What do you do?
Oh, I would like to wait.
Wait, do you move?
What? I'm safe behind this pillar, baby.
OK, all right.
You would like to disappear.
Roll me. Wait, you could just do that, right? With your ring.
It's technically a Dex roll.
Right. Get it. Do it.
I don't do shit.
I'm hoping that you're going to end this campaign on a good note.
You know what I mean?
There's three seconds. I didn't see that.
It's not a cool down. I didn't see that.
Three, two, one. There we go.
It's like the worst dice I've ever seen.
If he.
Now is a good time for a plus one, y'all.
You 357 does have a good time.
I'm going to do a three.
All you 357 does have. Oh, yeah, they do.
I'm safe behind this pillar, baby. Pillar falls on.
I got no point.
All right. You still fail, but you try.
You try. And he's like,
I see you, Dwarven Dragon Robot.
You cannot fool me.
Oh, I took off. I took off the necklace.
I see that you took off your fucking necklace.
You accessorizing in my fucking vault.
You bitch.
Damn, this guy is evil.
Oh, yes.
I kind of love this guy.
This transmission was like, too.
Can a couch coin count for a plus one?
It sounds a lot like scary Terry. Yeah.
Very fucking.
Yes, yes.
Oh, what about testy Tommy?
He was a real douchebag, too. Yeah.
Oh.
Ah, and a word.
Bad dragon ban the B word, bitch.
All right. One more bitches for the dragon.
Um, ah, hmm.
Good job, Frank Joyce.
We don't like that profanity around here.
He is a Christian Minecraft channel.
He breathes in.
And then exhales this breath that isn't fire,
but it's like this heavy magical breath
that you can feel on each one of your.
And your dragon.
All of you to make me a strength saving throw.
Shit. Oh, baby.
18. Congrats.
Actually, that's gonna be 19.
Whoo. 23.
Shit. Your clone clone.
Oh, you're both fail, huh?
You now have a disadvantage
on your next ability checks of any kind.
And you have disadvantage
on any kind of strength saving throws for the next minute.
You can repeat your saving throw at the end of your turns
to try and stop the strength saving throws.
Want to. Yes.
Thanks, Suiting.
It moves forward.
And as it gets closer.
Bomblin, you're hiding behind this pillar.
It looks directly at you.
It uses its frightful presence.
The creature that it chooses within 120 feet of it
must succeed on a wisdom saving throw or become frightened.
You succeed. All right.
Looks at you and he's like,
I can't say the B word, you fucker,
but I'm going to eat your bare fur as much as I fucking can.
You fuck ass. My gold.
As it moves closer, it's just preparing for something.
You can see it begin to glow and it's back to Razz's turn.
Rad, what do you do?
I'm going to summon a clone as well as my clone
is going to summon a clone.
Oh, shit.
Multiplication, duplication. Oh, no.
Oh, shit. Motherfucker, dude.
OK, roll me magic.
Oh, no. Fail.
Wait, that's my role.
Let's see what my clone rules.
Ah, OK.
That's another clone for me, bitches.
Well, OK, now three is a crowd.
And then I'm going to use all of our movement
to go to the right and hide behind this corner.
All of our movements.
Come on, guys.
The pain of this throttle.
He's like, God damn it.
I can't move that piece.
Fuckers duplicating more food for me, idiot.
God damn it.
Oh, so stupid movement system.
Have duplication powers doing that.
Bomblin back to you, buddy.
What do you do?
Fuck, dude, not prepared to fight a dragon.
Ah, I remember you had a relationship.
Are you willing to be in the trouble?
You know what?
Yeah, fuck that.
And fuck this dragon.
I would come running straight up and I would come and slash it with my sword.
Yeah.
Right.
That's a 16.
Oh, shit, you hit.
Yeah, it does magical damage.
That's a seven, baby.
Nice.
Also, question does is a dragon immune to being terrified?
Immunities.
Nope.
No, it's not.
No.
All right.
Well, my magical weapon, it says it's a magical weapon and is terrified.
So would that be like a wisdom save or be terrified of me and my bone sword?
Oh, yeah, baby.
I'd wink at that if I could, but I can't.
Oh, virtual tabletop not found.
All right, let's roll it over to you.
God plus two.
That's an eight.
Sick, baby.
Nice.
It is frightened, which means a frightened creature has disadvantage
in ability checks and attack roles while the source of its fears within line of sight.
The creature cannot will not even closer to the source of its.
He's like, I've been deep voice this whole time.
I didn't realize.
Fuck is like, I'm fucking scared of you, you stupid fucking bear.
I bone sword is that dragon bone.
Ah, yes.
Yeah, he's scared.
Yeah, much worse.
Yeah.
Minotaur.
Bone sword.
OK, that ends your go.
Bomb Lentie, 357.
Didn't hear a word of that.
Oh, yeah, your mic gave out.
Yeah. Give it the bone.
We go.
Can you hear me now?
Yeah, just talk loud for us.
It's going out slowly.
Going out.
Yeah, then yell.
Guys, she's glitching.
Oh, she's glitching.
Not a word.
Word.
Turn off your voice changer.
Fuck it.
Is it just me or does Ras look like that bandit guy
that used to steal dragon eggs in Spyro?
Oh, yeah.
Hold up your skull.
Yeah.
Ha ha ha ha.
We're good, dude.
We're good.
I'm sorry, my brain, my brain does these things.
It's all right.
No, the same.
I think it's Discord.
Discord does that shit.
How about now?
Almost.
I turned off the voice.
OK, we can understand you now.
Not good, but we can understand you.
You want to get through your turn and then you can fuck with it
while we lay out the other initiatives?
Yeah, that sounds like a plan.
All right.
That sounds like a robot.
Oh, good.
That means my voice acting was good.
Indeed.
I was going to attempt to shoot my crossbow, but I failed.
So I'm going to use my couch boy.
That's a success.
Thank God.
And it is loaded with one of the instant death arrows.
He has to do a con save to live.
I don't know if well, we're going to run it.
We're going to see what happens.
That's what we're going to do.
OK, con plus.
I think it's a success.
Con plus seven.
We're going to run it.
We're going to see what happens.
16 is a success.
But what I will say, as your dart hits him, like, and he's like,
Oh, we were.
Oh, all right.
Huh? Oh.
That's an 11 plus seven, that's an 18.
He's like, we're like goes up his arm and you can see like through his like
his scales, they kind of like get a little green and like flourish.
And he's like, oh, you could tell that it has affected him.
And it's not good, not good at all.
But it does not kill him. But he does take what you say, six damage.
And it do extra damage since it can't insta kill him.
You try. No, can't six damage.
Gotcha. But it was your crossbow of fire, right?
I guess in this situation,
should I also as well magic or basis? Yeah.
One. So that's three more.
You can tell fire does nothing to this dragon.
Was worth.
All right.
This fucking bear.
Oh, he moves back from you.
And then lets out of lets out a fire breath.
I'm going to need you to make me a defense role, Bomblin.
The 13.
All right. He exhales fire in a 60 foot cone.
Each creation, there is you must make a defense save
on a fail.
A 2D12 damage and in front of the fire.
Now, seven, seven damage is it burns up your fur.
And he's like, how about that?
You scary fucking bear.
What are you going to do?
What are you going to do with that stupid little sword of yours?
Huh? What are you going to do?
And he's going to make a wisdom save to not be frightened.
Which he gets disadvantage on.
What's to healing?
That's the one.
And almost two ones.
Who you heal for five from Debbie Snacks?
Yeah.
Thanks.
All right.
What do you do?
Well, all my clones are going to cast clone.
All right. 3D20.
This all has plus three, so one of them succeeded.
One of them succeeded.
So I get another clone.
Dance bonus for three, three, five, seven.
This helps your next role.
And then I'm going to use all of my movement
to move down this hall.
Way with everybody.
You get a minus one.
Trying to get behind it.
Any luck with fixing the voice?
Does it sound any better?
Yeah, it sounds great.
Actually, yeah, it's always better.
Yeah.
Wow.
DM Turkey, is this the is this the extent of my movement or can I go further?
Oh, you were like five, 10, 15, 20, 25, 30.
Well, this is IC RPG, so technically you can move a long distance or.
Well, this is IC RPG, so technically you can move a long distance or a short distance,
but you use an action to get to be short, which is 30 feet.
You get to go up that.
We have just been.
Razz clones dancing.
What's up, Flappy Balls?
Gangers, my guy. Hey, everybody here.
All right.
So I'm sorry, boy. Gangers, a very beautifully talented artist
and a funny as fuck comedian who plays video games.
You know what? And follow him. All right.
That's right. One of our longest running friends.
Hey, buddy. That's right.
Everyone activate the Cheers command right now.
That's Gangers voice that we have right here.
Yeah, buddy.
Yeah, buddy. That's him.
Yeah, we'll see what happens.
We'll fucking see what happens.
Hi, thanks for joining us.
OK, so that ends your go makes it.
Bombing again, bombing.
Right.
Just my turn.
It's been two turns knowing that I could hear.
They're coming.
I'm going to start running up towards the dragon
and coming swooping and come sweet roll.
I'm a throw up my bone sword.
Sweet roll is going to grab the bone sword in its beak
and then drill strike the dragon in the face with the bone sword.
Yeah, it's like an aerial.
You're so destruction.
Cheers.
Cheers, buddy.
That's fucking cool, Bomblin. Fucking cool.
I would I roll to hit that.
Um, I did see the stats for sweet roll a little while ago.
It's going to be sweet roll stats, strength.
He was still a child, so probably just like a plus one roll to hit.
That's one dexterity.
Rolls are plus one strength roll to hit.
Yeah.
Now, I'm going to try to get a little bit of a
more professional hand.
Oh, hey, it's cool, though.
You throw up the sword.
She comes flying in.
And I imagine that she flies past the dragon with the sword
spinning in a circle and just lands in the gold
and the gold goes flying everywhere.
I'm actually going to just drop on the scene here.
You're going to get a random.
Thing just to take the place of.
Oh, there actually wasn't any gold over there, so she lands in.
But there she is.
Yeah, your actual action, what do you do?
Which is the reason I'm ready for this?
That's the question.
Raise your hand if you're the original Raz.
Oh, shit.
Can you please stand up?
I don't think this rap song is going to help us fight them.
Oh, we.
There's a dragon yelling at me,
can I throw something I want to attempt to throw something in its mouth?
Gift an item.
Hell, yeah.
I want to throw a punch.
I need something.
Farmland.
Thanks. Backstage Bard.
Yeah.
Only one hundred.
So it's way over there.
Actually, I'm going to do that.
I do that.
Seventy.
Twenty five.
Dead sword magical ghost inspectors and race.
Follow your commands and still hate you.
That's a really cool source for us, actually.
Roll for initiative.
A new person sits on the couch.
Z, Magi, Z, Magi.
Yeah, thanks. Welcome.
Oh, you get the dead sword.
That's fantastic.
I would still like to throw this potion
inside the mouth of this dragon.
What is.
It's the potion of necromancy.
That's seven five tiny skeletons.
Oh, yeah.
But as he's yelling, he's like,
Ha ha, stupid bear, your winged griffin does nothing.
It's fucking stupid.
It's all done.
I don't roll me decks to throw it.
Nothing should ever hurt you.
Hello, Z, made.
That's a two.
So it just you throw it in and hit the ground.
Summon skeleton. How many is it?
We roll.
Oh, you can. Five.
Five. Powerful magic.
And it's baby eggs.
I.
Oh, dude, you're right.
These fucking guys, dude, you suck, man.
If you like, you're like Tess.
I get anything done, not doing anything,
not going anywhere in life, don't even have a soul.
My.
I'm having school now.
Thank you.
I got.
I got the last.
Yeah, you still.
Right.
The fact that you could just take your soul out,
I think kind of no avoids the fact of actually having a soul.
You summon five skeletons, Bama.
Now, the cool thing is with your new dead sword,
they will actually listen to whatever you say.
So what do you command them to do?
Eat the dragon.
All right.
Roll me five, D20.
They're all going to try and attack.
Right.
Oh, that's the 12th.
I wrote the wrong things.
All right.
I don't have real eyeballs.
One, six, seven, two hit.
Roll me to the six.
Yeah.
And I say six.
And I said, he's like, I'll eat these skeletons.
I'll eat them.
I eat them up.
Bones for me.
Oh, this is your go.
You do.
Well, first of all, I'd like to move too many things open.
I'd like to move just slightly out, like on the corner
where I can kind of just like reach around like that around the side.
Oh, my dad was a gutter bumbling.
And I'm sorry, I hear a reach around.
I can't help myself.
I would like to throw my poison blade of return,
but I realize I have a negative one to this role from my chance bonus.
But it's an 18th, so it's still a gift.
Gift a potion.
Is this fear for the dragon?
Frog Toys, you're playing, you're playing the game.
Frog.
No, they're not.
You're playing it.
Oh, no. All right.
Your poison blade, that ask you, Chuck it.
Six. Nice.
That is it slides in right where you hit him with the arrow previously.
You're aiming right at it.
It needs a man.
Stupid dagger.
Why does that hurt so much?
Dumb dwarven fucking robot person.
I hate you. I can't say, bitch.
Fuck.
He's real mad.
So because of the poison is going to take six damage at the beginning
of your next turn, as well as the blade returns to you.
He's real mad.
He.
Chomps down his potion of resist fear, removing his fear of you, Barman.
But he takes a step back and cast fire breath.
And I need you, my friend, to
not only roll me defense for yourself, but for all five of your skeleton.
Roll just yours first.
Yeah, that's a pretty good one.
Yeah, that's a.
Oh, God.
Yeah, that's not that's not.
I roll me five d twenty for the skeleton.
We roll.
All right.
Oh, thanks, city.
And then it is.
Let me double check here.
Let's roll again. Yeah, right.
Oh, 24, baby.
Half as much damage on a successful save.
So one of your skeletons take all of it.
And you and the other four.
Oh, you.
Seventeen.
So you take eight days, as well as all your skeletons.
Oh, my God.
Putting them down to.
And one of them just.
Yeah.
Oh, my God. Where does that put you at?
I have.
Yeah, because we got the anvil of healing,
which gave us one heart, and then I already had one heart.
Thank God. And he blows out this breath.
Taste my flame, fuck ass.
Now, Raz.
Been a little while since been your turn, but guess what?
It's your turn again.
Oh, yeah. And Raz, what do they do?
Well, I was just I was just looking up what?
What is far range?
Hmm. And I see RPG and the consensus that I'm getting is.
60 feet would be far.
Ish, I like to say you can move pretty much across the room,
but far you can't make an action and short is like 30.
It's basically like.
Okay.
So what I'm going to do is shout out cloned Jutsu, everybody.
One more time.
4020. 4020 plus three on all of them.
All of them, but one succeed.
Oh, fuck.
OK, so I have seven.
I have six clones.
Yes. And we're all going to move to the corner.
Of this. Probably get here.
There you go. Yeah.
There we go.
Yeah, yeah. Help me move them.
It's too many.
No, I don't want any of them exposed yet.
I'm in the back.
This is me, the lone guy in the back is me on the overlay.
You've got three more ready.
Can you put them like above like, you know, it's terrifying.
I you're up. I could I could try.
Yeah. Yeah.
All the other cloned Razzies being like, oh, that's me.
All seven of them there in the back.
All of them. That's me is.
And the funniest part is that you two have no idea.
He left his three Razzies and is coming back in seven.
Oh, here you go.
They just put him in the back.
Yeah, put him in the back.
Oh, I got. OK.
Fumbling.
Yeah, yeah.
Yeah, it's back around to me.
Yes, sir.
Great.
Ah, sweet roll.
Bring me back my other sword.
So retrieval.
And then bonus action, command skeletons to attack.
I.
So many fucking.
Two of them hit.
26.
Fresno, but no,
so that's not really does make life like helpful.
It is really does.
Eleven damage.
Oh, he feels that he's like
stupid bones.
I need calcium.
He went.
I need.
Surrounding. Yes.
People who haven't seen our stream before are going to see all these fucking Razzes
as they're like scrolling through the D&D section and they're going to be like,
what the fuck is going on there?
Hey, I.
None to say none to say someone just screenshot this
and post it on Facebook with no context.
You already mean all right.
Just Facebook seems like the right place to do that.
All right party activate taking the H iPad are these in God.
OK.
I've been taking on the
I'm taking the hobbits twice and god, god, god, god, god.
I'm taking the hobbits twice and god, god, god, god.
I'm taking the hobbits twice and god.
What is your soul?
This is finale, baby.
Hell yeah.
That's going to make even less fucking sense.
Love it.
That'd be a good gif.
That is obviously the most chaotic thing that's happened all season.
Oh, you just wait.
I recommend whoever's fighting right now, you better find some fucking cover.
Oh, fuck.
Oh, bonus, already bonus action, but I'm going to use my movement to climb on top of sweet
roll and then try to like get out of the way.
Just like, hi-yah.
And then we're going to like fly just like right above Tess.
Do that together.
All right.
And then pass back.
He's going to fucking do something.
That's for sure.
E357.
As the blade returns, he takes another six damage.
My side.
He falls on his arm a little bit and like limps on it.
It's like the poison courses into a phase.
What do you do?
I like to attempt to get him with another one of those death arrows.
Nice.
With my crossbow.
Fuck yeah.
It's a 13.
What is your deck?
Who?
It's 15.
So close.
That's OK.
Now, how does inspiration work?
Does that mean I can roll again?
What does an inspiration do?
I have one from earlier.
Inspiration lets you roll one more time.
Take the higher roll.
OK.
Yeah.
Tess got an inspiration a long time ago.
No.
Well, it doesn't mean he's back here.
So, what does that mean?
Yeah.
All right.
You shoot it out.
He dodged it.
Ha ha bitch.
I'm not supposed to say that word.
Wait a minute.
Ha ha.
Fuck ass.
Here we go.
He dodges.
All right.
It's his turn.
Re-roll.
And oh, you got to re-roll.
Get it.
Re-roll.
I'm so sorry.
I'm sorry.
It's hard to feel bad.
Yeah.
I do feel bad.
It's hard to feel bad.
I feel so bad.
Yeah.
At this point, it's just my force.
It's just how it rolls.
Yeah.
Maybe we should just make a new Proteus file on Foundry and give them a new set of dice.
Oh, it's not here.
Where'd it go?
Where did it go?
He's going to swing his tail around at all three of these skeletons is his first action.
That is a 12.
What is his bonus?
Strength plus eight.
That's a 20.
He's going to hit all of them for normal damage.
All three of them die.
Stupid fucking skeleton.
He's like, I hear you back there.
You red robed fuck.
What does it sound like?
You have 15 feet.
I don't know who you're talking to.
There's nobody back here.
As every single one of my clones like scream that.
Like echoing.
All right.
He's going to beat his wing.
And as he whips them around.
You know what?
I can see he's kind of he's going to flap his wing.
Then as he does that, you can see he's kind of limping on one of them.
But.
All you guys must succeed, at least you two.
You two in sweet roll must make a dexterity saving throw,
or you're going to fly up against the wall.
But I have wings, can't I just fly as well?
You were correct. I got a dirty 20.
That's making an easy roll to three, five, seven, which is a 13,
which means you use your wings.
Wait, roll got a seven.
All right. So sweet roll.
I got I got a 13.
Success. We're going to make it an easy roll because you have the wing.
Sweet roll is going to take one D10 damage.
She gets pushed up against the wall.
We were only has 10 health, so let's.
No. One.
Oh, we will take one day.
Right.
Raz, you know what time it is.
We all know what time it is.
Gift of Potion.
Star of Undyne, epic loot.
Plus one to all stats.
Ooh.
Thick ass.
Get a potion of plus one to all stats.
Oh, OK.
But first, Razathan.
Let's say you.
Well, I have to go first, right?
And then my clones go.
I guess.
Well, no, I'm just wondering if that's a rule or not,
because I'd much rather have my clones go first.
It's not at all. Why would it?
I don't think so.
All right. Well, my clones are going to go first.
We're all going to look at each other and say,
well, we can't really say God is great because I am God.
So I guess we're just going to say I'm great.
We're all in agreeance on that.
Not my God.
Yeah. OK, cool.
I send all seven of my clones out there
and they're going to scream, I am great.
And they're going to blow up.
Right. I'll take the movement distance.
That's cool.
So the dragon has to roll.
They don't even have to go out all the way.
Like if they're if they're all just like bunched up.
Yeah. If they're just like right here.
OK, totally cool with it.
The dragon has to make a defense save.
Six times.
Every time he fails the defense, they take full damage.
Every time he succeeds on the defense save, he takes half the damage
and the damage is what?
Now it's going to be
14 D12.
OK, we're going to do it per weight.
So how many is it per clone?
It's two D12 per clone.
So the first one runs out and explodes.
Defense save.
Seven.
Yes, his defense is a plus four, which makes it eleven.
So that's that's two D12.
Go ahead and do the other one.
No, no, no, I want to do this all at once.
OK, all right.
And that count for you out.
Here we go.
Plus for 11.
4012.
That's a nine.
It's the 13 he fails next one.
OK, 17, he succeeds.
Nice. Next one runs out.
Or 80 fails.
Right. Last one is 19.
You succeed. OK, eight D12.
Oh, wait, what about my tome of arcano?
My Libram arcano, where like it makes things auto crit.
You have to get the role for the grid, right?
Right. But if if this is an with no role
and the difficulty level is 16, would that mean that I had beaten a 16?
Now, OK, I'm just trying to squeeze more dice out of this. Sorry. All right.
OK, eight D12. Here we go.
Forty eight down.
And 48 damage.
And then the other two, which is half damage.
Go ahead and roll that to you. That is half of 14,
which is seven. And one more time.
One more time.
Oh, we can't also mention your pluses to magic, right?
We can't forget.
2D12. One more time. One more 12.
We roll the 2D12 and then whatever half of that.
Half of that will do.
What is your magic bonus?
Raz. One, I think. One. OK.
Wait, no, it's two. Right.
So two, four, six, eight, ten.
Eleven.
Two, four, six, eight, nine, ten.
For both. So that's 48.
Seven is 55 plus five is 60.
Oh, my God. There's so much room on this screen now.
I've got to squeeze anymore.
Damage.
The dragon had already taken 58.
That's 70, which makes it 128 damage.
The first one runs out and explodes and blows up.
Explodes in blood and shit just goes everywhere.
And the dragon's like, what the fuck?
And the second one runs out, explodes and he's like, she's like,
another one.
And just the magic goes into him,
starts sucking up everything inside of him.
The next one runs out and he's like, no, not another one.
Not not another.
Ah,
and the dragon
turns to mush on the ground as the blood mixes
with the blood of all the clones of Rav.
You step out from behind the corner as your
friends see this happening.
I mean, I don't think this would have ended any other way.
I thought he was going to fucking solar beam him
from like eight different directions, but why would I have to do that
if all I had to do is no roles and he has to roll defense? Yeah.
You like being powerful.
Yeah. Daisy chain suicide bombers.
What are you talking about?
And pile of blood bomb Linen and pick up.
I mean, Razz Christ.
Bombing the you walk over your closest and you pick up.
Well, I think he threw five sevens close.
Yeah, you're moving over there.
You walk over to the giant pile of blood test
and you pick up the dragon staff that's around.
Is a golden dragon staff, the golden dragon staff of Algerion.
This I'll go ahead and read it for you.
I'll copy it for you.
But while holding the staff, you have advantage on any saving throws
using breath weapons, any breath weapons against you.
A creature of the dragon type that you touch
the staff with can move through the city of common steel,
ignoring never remembers Dragon Ward.
The effect lasts until the creatures touched again.
The staff also has 10 charges.
While holding it, you can expend one charge to cast the command spell.
If you target a dragon with this casting, the dragon has disadvantage
on its saving throw and undie 10 charges.
That's command on people.
Command, so you know, you could speak a word of command
to anyone within range like sit, run, stop, run away.
Come here. Do this.
Do that. Like approach, drop, flee, et cetera.
And they will do that.
As I can do that to anyone.
Yes.
May I attempt to absorb the soul of the dragon?
The body that is left of it.
Sure.
You roll me a soul site.
Go ahead.
You think this would be like intelligence?
It would be a soul siphon.
Yeah, magic.
A soul site. Hey, look at that.
You pull the soul out of the body.
He's like, fuck ass.
Hello, fucker.
Seems you fucking killed me, bitch.
And he flew.
Sorry, man.
You were totally weak against my, you know, suicide bombers.
I'm sorry. But now,
if it makes you feel any worse,
if it makes you feel any better, I'm going to guide you to the afterlife
because it's my job.
Thanks, fucker.
Yeah. So you're just along for the ride until that happens.
You know, cool.
Fuck ass.
Is there anything else you want to tell us about this dungeon?
No, man, there's a lot of cool fucking shit in here.
There's about 100 gemstones that I was eating.
It's my sustenance. I only had 100 left.
But no, you guys go over to the vaults, all the treasure.
In the two alcoves that have gold in them, there is 500,000 gold pieces.
The combined weight of which is 10,000 pounds
scattered on the floor of the second alcove are 65, 100 gold piece gemstones.
All that remains of alternax is food supply.
You also have the dragon staff.
Almost just like, can I
can I open a portal right in front of the gold pile?
You try and it automatically.
Automatically fails.
Damn. Trying to open a portal out of the vault.
Well, how about this then? Me and all of my clones do another round of clone jutsu.
OK, I do.
In my head, your clones died when they did the explosion.
I feel like your clones are a little bit weaker than you,
but we can say you take the time to summon more and more clones.
Yeah, they only have one HV.
To summon more and more clones to carry all the gold out.
I'm fine with that, but I'm not going to sit here and roll it 100 times.
OK, well, then, yeah, I want like
enough clones to be able to carry all the gold.
OK. Dragon is dead.
I was going to open a portal and be like, all right, bitches, start shoveling.
Make all my clones do that.
You get the dragon step.
Anything you want to do with it?
Are you talking to me?
No, he's talking to me and I'm deciding if I want to be evil for the first time.
I don't know if you want to be evil with enough explosives to blow in toxic, a new asshole.
Yeah, I like 30 clones.
I mean, can I?
Is there anything my magic eye could tell me further about it?
Hmm.
Well, you do inspect it. You can see it was created by Neverember.
And you kind of gather the fact that Neverember was trying some sort to protect
common steel from dragons.
And you kind of put together that maybe that's why the adult dragon was flying around
the sea because it couldn't get over into a toxic, or into the common steel city.
So that's why it was created.
But you can gather now that the staff has been given to you, the magic has been lifted,
allowing all of the dragons now flight over common steel city.
And you can actually stop them from doing so by touching the dragons with the staff
and casting the magic spell back on them once more.
And you learn that this staff is now able to do the magic.
And you learn that this staff indeed can command things and anything of the not only dragon
species, but the dragon folk species, even like turtle dragons, other stuff like that.
Dragonborn reptilians.
Any kind of reptilians that you want to cast command on at this advantage to ignore your command.
So it's easier to cast command on all different kinds of reptilians with this staff.
Okay, um, before I do anything with the staff, Fonglin, do you intend on paying back your
debts?
I was about to pay it back right here.
We give you 250,000 and then me and Raz will take 250,000 and then our debt is paid.
Actually, I have no need for money anymore.
So I mean, I'll pay you my debt, but you no longer own it.
Oh, you are just part of the Legion.
It's only Boblin.
Oh, well, yeah, I'd like my share to be split between the both of you.
I don't really need money anymore.
That sounds advantageous of you, Raz.
Yeah.
Thank you, oh God of souls.
There we go.
There it is.
Yeah, I don't like it.
It feels icky, but I'll say it.
I'm just gonna...
Does that answer your question?
Yes.
I actually intend on, once the vault is clear of what Boblin plans to take from it, I'm
going to let you both get a head start and I'm going to call Narcissus on my scrying
stone.
And scry?
Well, you don't want Narcissus nosing around about why you're taking the red stone.
Because it's not in black.
But you don't want us to see that again.
I really don't want Sam coming to me when he's asking to give a report.
You don't want to?
ShangInsיד Лוק is the only変 Naj.
キ α Ге аt I don't If you definitely can't answer the question, try it.
Mr. Future King, Consulat of Intoxica.
Player card, set, roll.
Do you even have that title yet?
Are you just like the Royal Dick Appointment?
Like, what's going on with that?
Well, we actually have an extra one we need to add to the set.
Look, alright, the sushi date didn't go so well,
so we're planning on something with the severed finger.
Now, alright, this is fine.
But, it's fine.
Come on. Yo, thanks Frog Toys.
This could make or break my night.
Okay, well, if you're comfortable with it being here,
then I will call the Ascissians.
Yeah.
Uh, was that the one that's true?
Yeah, that's true.
Uh, describe the scene, or what you're gonna do, as an announcer.
But first, I also do want to say,
you guys already carried all the gold out.
So, when you're calling Narcissus,
are you calling him to Bomblin's Rough Riders,
or just to the Flail and Ale Inn?
Because you guys have carried all the gold out.
Just to the Flail and Ale Inn.
Bomblin?
Oh, that is a...
One last shenanigan, please.
Describe the Flail and Ale Inn, all the gold and everything around,
as if you're an announcer.
You're maddened, baby, do it.
God, I haven't done one of these in a while.
That's right, baby, we're coming down in here to the fourth quarter, man.
The heroes are looking hot, scoring up on big points on top of the dragon,
breaking them down all the way down to the bottom of the bracket.
That's right, as our heroes move on to next season, as new players come in,
we're gonna see how the draft rounds come around, baby, that's right.
Hell yeah, dude.
Hell yeah.
Okay, um...
On your scrying stone,
I'm gonna call Narcissus.
Fine, when you call him,
what do you say?
Sir, we have located the dragon vault and that within.
I think we have found the bargaining chip for legalizing the Legion.
He calls back.
The word.
Yes.
Are you able to bring the contents here?
Or will you need the Legion's assistance?
Uh...
We have just been raided, we have just been raided, we have just been raided,
I wonder who it's from.
It's from Mr. Brunswick.
It's been a while, buddy.
Hello.
Brunswick?
Hi, everybody.
How industrious.
Hi, everybody.
Oh, God.
Oh, no.
No.
Hi, everybody.
No, fuck.
No, he's multiplying.
He's like germs.
Hi, everybody.
This is what happens when you don't get 100%...
Hi, everybody.
...of bacteria.
That's the 99% that's cloning itself back.
Yeah, these are my clones that are helping you carry the gold over.
Yeah.
Go ahead.
Get him off there, Connor.
Hello, Brunswick.
Welcome to Chaos, my friend.
This is our finale.
Thanks so much for the raid.
It's been a while.
It's been a while since we've seen you.
I hope things have been going well for you.
How was your raid?
How was it going?
How was your stream, I mean?
Hosting a party, but...
Hi.
...and hype?
I know!
Hello!
Good to see you.
I hope, Brunswick and friends, I hope you're having a good time.
If anyone's actually here, say hello.
Good to see you.
Come and join us here on the couch.
Yes.
So, uh...
Very intense moment.
No, sir.
I do not believe you will need help carrying it over.
Raz has it covered.
Yeah, I'll have the clones carry it for you.
Uh, for as long as you need, but I...
I do intend to leave here as soon as possible.
Yes, we...
We will part ways.
Help me bring the stuff there, and I will...
We can part ways.
He calls back, he's like,
Okay, well, I'll see you soon.
This is wonderful news, T357A.
We will use this to legalize the Legion
and grow them here in the city of common steel.
We will use them...
Bring forth our new home wave law.
Especially with the new queen being indicted.
Legion sound like weed.
We're gonna legalize the Legion.
Legion for everybody.
Yes.
So, um...
Legalizing.
This is everybody who uses T.I.A.'s secret service type shit.
We're at this point right now.
Smoke weed everyday.
Why is that one so long and so loud?
I don't know.
For what?
Thank you, Sir T.I.A.
Perfect timing.
Yeah, appreciate you.
You gotta legalize it, my guy.
We're at a splitting point here, my friends.
And we've cleared out the vault.
We have things to move forward with.
We're kind of at the point right now
where you guys are gonna tell us what happens
with your characters moving forward here in the city of common steel.
And what I will say is we have already discussed behind the scenes
a little bit of the idea of bringing these three characters back
for a second campaign and a follow-up book
that we have ideas to do if that's something that we want to do.
But there are two things that I must reveal to you now
before you tell me what it is and where your characters go
and how they end up here at the end.
Now that you have the money, successfully deemed the vault,
I mean, that's it.
That's what this whole campaign was about.
So, Raz, in the furthermore weeks of you sleeping...
Pause!
Play!
I always forget to breathe during the...
Thanks, Bart, appreciate it.
In the furthermore weeks of you sleeping and resting,
you get images that come into your mind.
And the consensus of these images,
now that you are the holder of the staff of death,
you're supposed to be leading forth these souls.
And you use your clones to do a lot of your dirty work for you.
Even though they don't do a very good job,
you do use your clones to do so.
But something...
darker and more sinister comes to you in your dream.
Something or someone that was more powerful than Ned Bright,
someone that was above him,
first coming to you in your dream, calling for you,
telling you that you need to prove yourself
and telling you you need to work harder and do more.
Too much of a backup of souls.
And some of the things that Ned Brave has discussed to you in the past
start to slowly make sense,
as if Ned wasn't the one on the top.
You yourself are not a god, but neither was Ned,
but he was doing God's bidding,
by pushing forth the souls into the night.
And you don't know a lot about it.
That's all that I give you.
Additionally, in the fourth weeks that come,
all three of you receive a letter that says,
the flail and ale is being rebuilt,
and the Undermountain beckons, he wrote.
And in this letter, Raz, you can see a signature at the bottom,
and you kind of gather from this letter that maybe someone,
picked down the whole list.
Huh.
Well, they're not going to be happy,
but I probably should find them.
And T357, you start the work of discussing with Nemo,
about finding his father.
And oddly enough, it seems that his father might have escaped
into the Undermountain, flail and ale.
You know it, baby.
And of course, Bomblin, you continue to try to seduce the Queen,
and we'll have to discuss more of that later.
But for now, during this time,
before we decide to move forward to do anything else,
one by one I would like you guys to tell us where your character ends up
and where we can visualize them for a little while,
before we decide to pick them back up if we ever do.
T357, you can go on ahead and start.
First, where does your character go?
What do they do?
Upon rekindling a friendship with Schemo,
I've actually moved out of the Roughriders and into,
in with Schemo, but I am working as part of,
with the heads of the Legion,
and legalizing it as more of a secret service and espionage
to the Royalty with our ability of the Dragon Staff,
using that to keep the Dragons away,
but using our power to legalize the operations of the Legion.
Oh yeah.
All right.
Also, Mew the next lives with us too.
That's fair.
All right, Raz.
What's your favorite part about you going left to right?
Oh man.
I want to, I want to do mine last, but I need to know what Vomlin does.
Okay.
Vomlin's next, baby.
Vomlin?
Yeah.
What, Vomlin?
He's struggling, everybody.
Everybody!
All right.
That just like my hair was all like all up in my fucking eyes.
So, over the next couple of weeks,
you'll see Vomlin trying to court and begin relations with the Queen,
trying to do it from more of a practical standpoint from his own Vomlin Roughriders,
but secretly, Vomlin's doing crime.
I know, right?
He's out there.
He has started his own Griffin Riders gang.
As the Ruffians are now training to be Griffin Riders,
we have established a Griffin stable on top of Vomlin's Roughriders,
where the Ruffians could fly it on the Griffins and then just park there.
So it's great.
We've also started open recruitment for more Ruffians and such,
and then started our own Griffins and Catching Serpent.
I love the idea that do you think the Legion would have recruited the Roughriders to be like their muscle?
See, like they keep trying to, but Vomlin's there.
Thank God, thank God!
Tess just loves Vomlin.
Like, she doesn't have the necessary heart to kill him because she doesn't have a heart,
but she just lets him live because it's like, what is he really hurting?
And all I've done is rounded up all the Ruffians and just made them mobile.
We're not really doing anything.
They just keep pressing the Gabberling Hall to make more money.
So services are getting better, but oddly enough, crime rate in the city has gone down.
Okay.
All right, Raz.
What do you got for us now that you know?
Okay, so I'd like to imagine there's just like always clones of Raz walking around now and like spreading the word of himself to people.
And I'd like to be like, we're in the flail and ail, all three of us sitting around a table,
and we're just like, you know, having dinner or whatever.
And I just speak up like, all right, guys, well, it's time for me to go.
Do you have anything to say on the matter?
Like, are you leaving forever?
I don't think forever, but I do need to go somewhere for a while to help fix some things and I guess prove myself worthy somehow.
I'll find a way to do it my own way.
You guys are what I'd like to call friends, but you're a tad bit closer than that.
You've become my family over this time and you are precious to me.
I enjoyed our adventure together and I wholeheartedly thank you for helping me spread my beliefs.
What about you, fur bag?
You got anything for me?
Yeah, it's been great protecting you, buddy.
I mean, you done became the god that you swore that you loved.
I mean, if that's not evil, I don't fucking know what to do.
Toz on!
All right, well.
Good luck going wherever you gotta go.
You know where to find me.
Oh, believe me, I'll know where to find you.
And I won't be that far away.
You should still be, you know.
What is happening?
What?
I think he's going to kill us.
No, no, no, no.
You said it's not that far away.
At that moment, I'm going to draw out a knife and stab myself in the chest and I'll just turn into a puff of smoke.
I was a clone.
And then you can sew the camera zooming in in a different realm on real Raz, sitting in the captain's chair of his pirate ship in the death realm.
And he's got a bunch of fucking souls in front of him and he's ferrying them across the river as he sits there with his master's skull.
Nice.
And cue the Pirates of the Caribbean music.
Yeah, I would play it, but that's like super copy.
Yeah.
The Disney overlords.
The Confers.
That's pretty sick.
Pretty sick.
I like the way this ended.
Bleeding the Legion, bombings, griffin riders.
Love that.
This Raz on a pirate ship in the land of death.
I mean, you're basically a real CV.
I'll be King console for sure.
We'll see about that.
Won't we?
Yeah.
You're basically Davey.
Shit, I'm out.
There you go.
Before we go, rest.
Can you play us out on your guitars?
Oh, I cannot.
I can rest her.
Rest her.
Can you play us out on your.
Oh, like both of us.
No, too much discord.
Appreciate.
Oh, yeah.
Oh, the final song.
Yeah.
Fuck.
Yes, we can.
You want to play death is coming for you for everybody live here?
Oh, shit.
Yeah.
I guess.
It's actually a good point.
Frog toys.
I don't even remember the fucking song itself.
It's been a while since I played it.
See?
He's left all of his worship hymns.
He's even forgotten where he came from.
I think I got the chords.
Probably.
That sounds right.
Is this how we're seriously ending it?
Yeah.
All right.
Well, the camera could slowly zoom out on a clone Raz in the middle of the street.
And he's just death is coming for you.
Death is coming for you.
There's no point in hiding because death is coming for you.
Not a rip.
You got sound strong place.
Gonna make sure you fucking hate it because death is coming for you.
Happy finale.
Everybody's coming for you.
Yeah.
Fuck yeah.
Maybe we'll do that again for the chaos credits here at the end.
But we're going to take five so they can get out of costume.
And we're going to come back and give our final thoughts about this campaign and water deep the Dragon Heist as a whole.
So we'll be right back, everybody.
Don't go anywhere.
One final short rest for love, death and dice.
The Dragon.
Western.
Oh, yeah.
Credits.
Cheers.
Heroes.
Period.
Please.
Guys, thank you all so much for your support this campaign.
We really hope you come and join us for the next one.
Thank you all so much for everything.
We appreciate it.