Welcome back to our podcast on today's episode. We are going to be doing am I the asshole
Starting off am I the asshole
For making my new boyfriend get an STD test. I
18 female started dating this guy 19 men barely even a month ago
We haven't done anything sexual yet because when we were talking the topic of body count came up
Normally, I don't care about this, but he said his is 14 in that it started in his first year college a year ago
14 at 19 years old and in that short time
Short of a time span is a bit concerning to me minus three in the span of two years
And I got tested after each relationship ended
I asked him if he had recently or even ever been tested and he said no
I told him that I won't do anything sexual until he gets tested and shows me the test results
He's refusing which in itself is a red flag to me, but I guess he thinks I don't trust him in my asshole
No, that's why not
Okay
This
Is there a day for in a year
Yeah, never test
I
Don't think she should be in question. I'm good
Yeah, 14 in a year not tested
Definitely needs to get to honestly the fact that he's refusing
should honestly
Be a relationship breaker because if he's not willing to do that for you
that kind of like I
Don't know
Yeah, yeah that like before you do anything with anybody you should get tested especially like
14 in a year and you never thought hmm, let me go make sure I don't have nothing but I feel like it's the big like
Misconception that oh if I don't have any symptoms or anything like I must not have anything but
That's not the case like
Mm-hmm. Yeah, like I know guys
more sp- I think guys like don't
Typically show symptoms of like STDs and STIs and stuff like that, but don't quote me
Don't quote me safe sex is great too guys
Yeah
I'm just surprised I mean
The Jaycock he never thought of getting tested
I don't know how to feel about that. It's just I don't know
It's something maybe he thinks it won't happen to him. I don't know
Maybe but yeah
Yeah
He definitely needs to go get that done
Mm-hmm
It doesn't be a problem
I think I have the next one
Okay, so
Why the jerk for choosing a university based off where my crush went?
I go to a university with two campuses in two cities in opposite sides of my country
You can switch campuses at the end of each year and switch back and forth
Campus the first year campus B second year campus a third year again a
Lot of people spend two years in one and then switch to the other for their final two years
Last year was my second year and I had to make a choice of whether to stay in the campus and spent two years out
Or go to the other one. I had lived in both cities previously
It didn't have much of a preference. So I decided on the basis of whether this girl I had a crush on was switching or stay
She was the first year when I was a second year and I didn't really get to know her that well last year
The reason is I faced a pretty debilitating illness. It had diminished my looks a lot second year hair loss loss of muscle mass
But weight gain cuts on my face from surgery, etc
People always said I was good looking before and I knew a time I'd be in the back and as it was second year
I looked terrible and I approached her
Likely and it likely wouldn't be successful
So I decided to just spend my time wait for my looks to come back by third year and then approach her
For that to happen. Of course, I need to be not be on the same campus as her
So I discreetly asked around where she'd be and chose the same campus. My plan worked out perfectly
She and I stayed on the same campus and by the time this year rolled around my cuts had faded
My hair grew back as thick as normal. I regained muscle mass and lost the extra fat, etc
I began striking up conversations slash joking around with her and she reciprocated well, etc
The issue is some of my friends think I'm creepy for making my choice on which campus to stay at
On the basis of a girl. I had nothing with I don't see an issue with that
I made my decision with no expectation that it would work or feeling that it needed to more
So just I wanted to take the chance either way. So whether it succeeds or fails, I don't regret it later
I don't see how that's problematic. Am I the jerk?
I don't think he's a jerk, but it is kind of odd
I don't know what I mean. I'm just because if he
If he a jerk for doing that, I mean, I don't think so
But he's definitely weird doing it. Basically the entire choice off of like a girl
That you saw once like what if she got something that you don't like like what if something about personality, you know
Like next thing, you know, you're like, oh no and immediately get that choice
What was this reasoning like, okay
If if it didn't work out, would he have regretted it? Like did he say anything like that? I'm sorry
Let me see. I think he just said that he didn't want to regret not following her
Yeah, I don't think he's
I don't know like is it worth like it? I don't know that the money difference or quality difference between two campuses
He said he's staying on campus
Or is he just going to a different campus for school? It's like I think the same school
They just have different campuses in different cities. Yeah, he's he's lived in both of them and didn't really have a preference
Mm-hmm. I'm just that's weird. I don't know. Okay, that's just like that's just I don't know
How you gonna tell okay, he gets with her. How is he going to like tell her especially since his friends know like a truth?
The truth is going to come out eventually. This is weird. It's just weird to all hell
Some people might think it's romantic. That's I don't want to say delusional but that type of romanticism is
It's like that would never work in real life
You know, I mean, so this is like, oh no
Yeah
Definitely seem like something that's like
Similar stories where they follow the person and then the person's kind of like put off and don't know how to feel about it
It's looking like some stalker shit
Yeah
It's cuz like why would you want to
Like conversation you asking around which campus she gonna be at I think you're gonna be like, oh, I don't know
Like conversation you asking around which campus she gonna be at I think you go to that campus and now you trying to make your move
It's like, okay
I don't I don't
I definitely could have like come at this a little better like instead of like
Completely changing his campus he could have gone to the campus like visited and talked to her maybe but it's in a different city
I mean if it's a city
But like even then it's just like you could have you know found social media
Maybe made a move through times or maybe you can met her once I'd be able to be like, oh I'm visiting this campus
We're a little bit cuz a teacher that he's going here for I'm just asking for some help and be setting it up
The cover story sure, but you meet her once and then you go back to me things. Is it still weird? Yeah, but it's a more reasonable
Yeah
So it's like I don't I don't know
Um, all right, so I'm gonna do something for you
For this next story
Okay
If you want to move on
Heads or tails?
Tails
Tails?
Yeah, I guess yeah tails
Okay
So am I the a-hole for making a real-life Pokedex of girls at my university?
What is that?
What?
Do you guys know the basis of a Pokedex real quick?
I do
Like a voodoo doll?
No, no, no, so a Pokedex, okay, you know Pokemon, right?
Yeah
Okay, so the Pokedex is like every time you capture like a random Pokemon, right?
It gives you description like all the information about the Pokemon and
It like so it basically shows you everything and a Pokedex is basically like a library of that
So say so in the original game you captured all of them you would have a full library of all the Pokemon in that region basically
So it's like I don't know how to simplify it
But
So
So especially in your college I began working on this project casually
I like to keep notes on women that talk about their favorite things, the activities they enjoy, gags and candy that they like, sappy ass like that
I suck at remembering things so I decided to keep a spreadsheet
Eventually after getting a handful of entries I offhandedly mentioned it to my friend Google
One had the idea that I shared with them so they could keep all new entries as they caught different entries
So this expanded further
Right now 40 guys have access to it and it's mainly guys in my frat
And the women who are featured girls are from different sororities
We also added more information such as where you should take them if you really want to press them
And we don't keep this information for nefarious or scumbaggy reasons
I doubt that
Just to help us know what we can do, just to help us know what to do when we want to depress certain girls
Like the original idea of this was to keep information like their favorite colors so we had to get their favorite colors
Now it's helping a lot of guys
Somehow
A girl that was on the list found out and was pissed the fuck off
She was able to trick it back to me so I'm assuming someone was looking for her snitch when the Poke-Dex was not making the girl like him
So she's pissed off and made it out to be a guy for hooking up with women
But it's most definitely not that
It's just to impress them to make dates easier
That's it
She's made a big deal of this telling so many girls around campus and now saying by the start of the fall semester
None of them will be visiting our frats or going to our parties
Now all these guys are mad at me when I'm not even the one who told the girls about the list and they're all using the list
I also think it's very unfair to say at least since sex wasn't about it at all
Am I the asshole? There's an edit
I'm not a stalker
There's no information that could be used to hurt somebody only to have a better date and it isn't about sex
I never used it for just sex
Now how y'all feeling about this?
That shit is weird
Yeah that is so weird
Like that's so inauthentic
Like what happened to just talking to people and getting to know them via authentic self?
Exactly
My vision on it is that even the things they say like this isn't about sex
If it's only for a better date it's still weird because it's like
Their favorite thing is public information to these 40 guys
Exactly
So for example
Like from my vision it's like if somebody knew that
Like I had to think about that I don't tell a lot of people ever since I got on campus
Unless you really get to know me is that I'm really into like rally and like motorsport
So if a girl on the second date is like hey
Do you like this thing? I'll be really confused because it's like
Huh well I'll also be impressed if she likes the thing or it's like hey is it X, Y, and Z?
Because I've been hearing about it from this person and that person
So yeah but then I find out that somebody told her
Then I'll be upset because it's like
I guess I don't know
That's very odd like that's very off putting like why is there a list about information?
Like I don't care if it's you know how they say it's all it's just innocent favorite color what they like
No that shit is weird
Yeah
I just want to know on your own like
Yeah
Alright so the comments on this post I'm actually looking at them right now
All of them are like blowing through OP even after the edit
Where they're saying nah they're saying just for the dates they're trying to
They're trying to sell more
There's no way because if they want to buy that they make the effort and not do the stock distribution weird shit
Yeah exactly
It's like these are frat boys
Oh lord and I know they I know I know they like frat boys too
I'm sorry there's no they aren't from like a non-BWR Jesus Christ
Yeah that's definitely not an HBC like that is a PWI
Because at this point if we heard we would have heard about that at this point
No we wouldn't
I feel like these boys
Like Jesus wow
Very odd
And that girl has every right to be mad like
Why are you putting folks information out there like that
And then it's like he's not even taking accountability for his actions
The biggest plow hole and the most like speaking line for me though is the whole
What was it
Blah blah blah blah blah
I assumed somebody was simping for her snitch when the Pokedex wasn't making the girl like him
I don't know how that line is of itself is just like nah
Like that is the fairest of all
I'm like a holy
Like why are you trying to manipulate people into liking you and then getting mad when they don't like you
You're just with your own time bro give up
These kids are lost
This is about a year ago though
And I think it's spring semester summer semester so
But yeah it's a lot
Now do you want one more story or nah
I have a good one
Go ahead
All right it's kind of lengthy
But it says
Am I the asshole for not wanting to transfer from my 20 year old male school to my girlfriend a 19 year old female school
For some background information we are both sophomore students in college and have been dating since high school
Senior prom king and queen and all that jazz and we were seen as perfect
My girlfriend was taking an athletic scholarship to school up north while I was to remain on an academic scholarship back in our home state
Roughly 18 hours apart
We did long distance and did have a hiccup at the start due to something like this situation
She wanted me to transfer to something closer to her because I was not able to see her every day or at least weekends like she wanted me to
I ended up working hard and saving money to go see her every month because this was a small airport
To small airport it was roughly a thousand dollars every month
She would end up having a career ending injury playing her sport and would end up deciding to transfer to another state school in our home state with an academic scholarship
Now she is telling me that even though we are only six hours apart
And I can go see her every weekend that it is not enough and I need to transfer to her school or it's not going to work
My school is the eighth ranked school in my major while hers is in the 104th
My school didn't offer the doctorate program she wants to enter in either so that's not an option for her
She is stating that I won't be making enough money to save and go see her and buy groceries while not being able to work Friday Saturday and Sunday morning
In that if we were with each other I could
However I don't think this is logical at all because if she cared about my money this summer would have gone different
After her career ending injury I quit my college serving job and moved in with her to take care of her after she had her major surgery
She could not walk for eight weeks
The original plan was that I would help her 24-7 for the first two weeks and then I'll be able to get a job during the days to take care of her
This did not come to pass and after eight weeks was when she let me get a job
That being said no one hires a college student about to head back to college in four weeks
I struggled immensely watching my bank accounts hit zero and nearly filing for unemployment benefits
Now with virtually not many not what the heck now with virtually no many she wants me to transfer colleges no money I think you meant money
Virtually no money she wants me to transfer colleges in which I would have to pay for all of it by myself
Without any parental support like I do now in a much worse program with way less opportunity than my current school
This her second time she has given me this ultimatum and I can't transfer so my question is am I the asshole for not wanting to transfer away and wanting to continue trying long distance
Definitely not I think my brother needs to leave for real
I don't I'm sorry but like there's no way
Like she's forcing him to risk because I don't like that stuff but who try to force people to go to a different college even though you know hey money like it's better financially for me
It's like you can hold out if you really like that person you would just hold out how many ever years even if you're injury
So I think for the college and monster.
Yeah, and his college like he has more benefits with his major and whatnot like it's a better fit for him. And if you were to transfer, it's worse so
I think she's pretty selfish.
Oh yeah, she did work. Right. You ain't go see him. You ain't spend no money. You ain't try to let him get a job because you want to be catered to and
Now you want him to transfer you like you're very demanding and ain't doing nothing to, you know, right. So him you want to be together. Yeah, it's a lot.
I wouldn't be with her but that's just me.
It's definitely not the a home. But it's nice he still wants to work things out them. Yeah, he has more willpower than I would. That's what I'm saying after that second one. Yeah, I'm sorry I can't do this.
Thank you for watching our podcast. This was my now Cameron.
We'll see you in the next episode.