And it was one of the few times I've seen Jesus
himself. And he was at the front door of the
house. Wow. And I looked and he looked at me
and he said, there is more. And he turned around
and walked as if, come follow me. Oh, wow. And
after that, I was like, I told my friend, there
is more. He said it himself, there is more. God
promises in Joel 2 .28 to pour out His Spirit
on all humanity. Welcome to Global Outpouring,
where we contend for that promised outpouring,
we equip for that outpouring, so that we may
engage in that very outpouring. I'm Philip Buss.
And I'm Sharon Buss. Welcome to the podcast today.
We have with us a very, very special lady. She
was with us for the School of the Supernatural
Translation by Faith that we had recently with
Bruce and Reshma Allen. And her name is Patricia
Bartell. And she has an amazing story of how
she came from being an orphan to being a success.
An amazing success in so many ways. You'll just
love her story. Thank you so much for joining
us today. We are delighted to have you with us.
And we know that this is going to be an exciting,
exciting podcast for you. But before we get started,
we want to encourage you, if you haven't already
done so, that you go to our website, globaloutpouring
.net, and make sure that you're on our email
lists and that you are... connected to us because
we want to stay connected to you. And if you're
hungry for God, if you have a hunger for God
and you want to know him more and you want to
go deeper in your relationship with him, this
podcast is one that will help you. So stay tuned
and go back and listen to some of the other ones
and share them with your friends. This is an
opportunity for you to go deeper in the things
of God. So we're here today with Patricia Bartel,
who joined us for the School of the Supernatural
Translation by Faith. And Patricia, thank you
so much for joining us today. This is really
going to be fun. It's a pleasure. I'm looking
forward to it, especially now that we've come
to the end of the school. It's been what an amazing
week, what an amazing treasure you have here.
Yes, it's been tremendous. We did a podcast with
Bruce and Reshma some weeks ago, encouraging
people to come. I don't know whether anybody
of our listeners came, but, you know, we just
want to encourage them to stay in contact with
the ministry of Bruce and Reshma Allen. And that
is StillwatersInternationalMissions .com. Yeah.
And you have also, you have a website. Yes. So
during the school, I help with the Hebrew part
of it and also the activations. And that's just
a beautiful role because they get to hear the
word, they get grounded, they get training, and
then they go through the veil. and they get to
have their own encounter with the Lord. And so
in that, so people can afterwards go to my website,
patriciabartell .com forward slash Hebrew, because
I have other things I do, but then that gives
them the Hebrew cards and some of the tools I
use. Yes. And so just to give a little bit of
a recap about the school, and we'll put a link
in the show notes for when Bruce was describing
this for us, but he teaches from... The question
that the Holy Spirit gave him over 20 years ago
about can a man be translated by faith and how
he studied and studied. And it's all through
the word, the glory of God and being moved into
the things of God. You know, in Daniel, it says
that. They that know their God will be strong.
And the King James says, and do exploits. I don't
think that's the best translation. I think take
action was how I have heard it in another translation.
But the idea is that in these days that we're
living in, the closing days of time before Jesus
comes back, before the rapture, before the millennium,
and all of those things, that there's this season
of time where God's people at least a remnant
of God's people, are going to get so lit up with
his glory and so filled with his character and
his goodness and doing the things that he leads
us to do like Jesus did when he walked the earth.
He said, the works that I do shall you do also
and greater works. I mean, that began already
in the book of Acts, right? But we're not seeing
a whole lot of that. It's starting now. Yeah.
But, you know, over the last hundred or two years,
you know, you don't see just a whole lot of those
greater works. There are some. God has always
had a remnant. He's always had some that are
out there ahead of the rest of the body of believers
that are kind of lagging behind. And some of
them not even believing that these things are
possible in our day. So Bruce goes through scripture
after scripture after scripture. And his wife,
Reshma, teaches on discernment. And let's get
this right. You've got to do things by the word.
You've got to test every spirit. Because there's
counterfeits, but there's only counterfeits of
the real. You know, you don't have a counterfeit
$3 bill. Nobody's going to counterfeit a $3 bill.
It just doesn't happen because there isn't a
real $3 bill. So anyway, so your part in this
has been going deeper into the Hebrew and bringing
out things for us to get a deeper understanding
of what the scriptures are saying. And then you
helped us operate in our holy sanctified imagination.
Which, as Bruce teaches so well, Jesus made it
clear, especially in the Sermon on the Mount,
about what you think in your mind is considered
reality. Jesus said, you've heard that you're
not to commit adultery, but if you're looking
at a woman in the wrong way, you're committing
adultery already with her in your heart. So what's
going on in your imagination, God considers to
be real. So I want you to just say that I...
Deeply appreciated how you led us in the activations
and helping us to use our sanctified imagination
to draw closer to Jesus. And just give us a little
piece of that, would you? Yeah, sure. So because,
you know, one of the things when I first started
engaging and when Bruce said, it is your birthright
to see. Because unless, you know. From the beginning
of how he teaches it, I realized like, wow, this
is my birthright. Unless you are born again,
you cannot see the kingdom of God. That's what
he said to Nicodemus in John 3. Exactly. And
so when I first got that concept, I'm like, well,
of course, then that means I can see. But what
am I seeing? I didn't have a grid for it. Right.
What does that look like? Right. Yet the whole
word gives us pictures of it. Right. And a picture
is worth a thousand words. Right. And so as I
began to take first, the Lord was, it was funny
when I started was I started seeing in my dreams.
And what I mean by that, I would be at a service
in my, in a dream. I'm in this service and then
I'm seeing in that dream, you know, I'm like,
oh, so this is what it looks like, you know?
Well, that was kind of the Lord to give it to
you that way. Right. So then I could have a grid
for different things that I would see. And then
it got to be in my private time. Because I would
worship before the Lord. And he, you know, just
all of a sudden, I always thought sometimes it
was just my imagination. Right. Until I realized,
wait a minute, I'm not actually making this up.
Because I can't make up that kind of a story.
Right. You know, I needed something like a storyline
to follow to make up the story. But this was
just happening. And one of the special times
was. And we might go into that a little bit more.
But when I was 21 and just seeking after God,
he just touched my life so much and healing my
broken heart. And I was in the living room of
the place I was staying and a friend of mine
were just worshiping the Lord. And I kept asking
people, there's more of God. There's got to be
more. Yes. You know, I had just finally tasted
and I grew up in the Assemblies of God church.
And so it was like this ritual. It was very structured.
So I didn't experience so much of God there as
far as our relationship. It was just a bunch
of rules. So here now, I had experienced like,
this God is real. And now I'm in worship. But
I started asking people. I started asking pastors,
what about this? What about that? The things
around the presence of God. Nobody could answer
me. And it's like there's got to be more. Because
they've not experienced it themselves. Exactly,
yeah. Which is really scary. Yeah. Because, you
know, what the congregation hears is just the
experience of the pastor. So if he's never had
any deep revelation or any dreams or anything
like that, he has nothing to share on it. Exactly.
And part of it is that people don't have a grid
that there is more. Whatever we've got, whatever
level we're at, there is always going to be more.
You know, God himself goes from glory to glory.
So we should have an expectation of going from
glory to glory. You know, just being grateful
for what we have, but then there's that hunger.
That hunger is what began. And so in the living
room that day, after asking so many people, not
getting any answers, and even my friend was like,
Patricia, just be grateful for what you have.
But I said, but there's got to be more. Anyway,
so here this afternoon, I'm in the worship, and
God's glory just comes as He was always faithful
just to kind of... Put us in this little cocoon
of his presence. And I turned to my left, and
it was one of the few times I've seen Jesus himself.
And he was at the front door of the house. Wow.
And I looked, and he looked at me, and he said,
there is more. And he turned around and walked
as if, come follow me. Oh, wow. And after that,
I was like, I told my friend, there is more.
He said it himself. There is more. And that began
that, you know, being able to see. And then like
Moses, you know, in the burning bush, it says
he actually turned to look. So then I just made
it a practice. You know, I'll be in church service.
And I was like, okay, I'm going to look. I intentionally
look. And that's when I began. My eyes were more
and more open to see the angelic. You know, people
have asked me, do you see the demonic? And I
don't intentionally look into that realm, if
you per se. But I just want to see God's kingdom.
Because that's how you discern the counterfeits.
You know, when they're doing the money, they
never show them the counterfeit until they've
handled so much of the real money. Yeah, and
a bank teller. Right, exactly. And then they
throw a counterfeit in. So this was my training
ground as I began. But a lot of it then, too,
was like somebody had shared, like, if it's like
going through a curtain. So I'm like, OK, so
I would go home because I needed a natural, an
anchor to go from the natural so I could have
a grid for the supernatural. And so a curtain
it wouldn't be. You know, I'd take the curtain,
open it, walk through. And it was just a step
of faith. Some people call it a prophetic act.
I just like this is just me stepping through.
And that happened, though, the more I did that
pretty soon, I stepped through and I was on the
other side. And just, you know, those moments
were so precious with the Lord that this is,
he wants us to be with him. Absolutely. He wants
us to build that, to get to know him at a deeper
level. Right. Always deeper. Always deeper. There's
always something deeper. There's always something
higher. There's always something more. Yes. Remember
Sister Gwen, our founder preached a message once.
There's room at the top, you know. Yeah. Yes.
There's room at the top. Exactly. Exactly. So
you mentioned at a point in your life when you
had a broken heart, but you went through some
amazing things in your whole life. Why don't
you go back and give us your background? So I
was born in Bolivia, in La Paz, and I spent the
first five years of my life in an orphanage.
And before I was adopted into a family in Montana
where I grew up, one of 18 children. I don't
recommend that because of the lifestyle that
was in it. And then it would be like 13 years
of abuse because the adoption was not for the
correct reason as far as on the adopted mother
side. And so, however, through that, I've gotten
to a point, and I'll just preface this for your
listeners, is that you know, on this side of
all the healing of it. And you look back on your
whole journey, any of us, what we've gone through,
we all have a story. And the forgiveness and
understanding God's hand in it all had so deeply
touched me that I realized because of my past,
I am who I am today. Right. And I wouldn't trade
for anything where I'm at today. Right. And so
when people look at my past, like, no, I would
have. gone through it again to have what I have
today. Absolutely. Yes, it was hard. Yes, it
was brutal. And so just starting on the level
of, let's say, when I speak about my broken heart,
I was raised up to believe that my biological
mother didn't want me, my biological father didn't,
my aunt didn't, and that's why I ended up in
the orphanage. And then when I was introduced,
now this part was true, introduced to the Bartow
family, that my adopted mother, When my dad handed
me over to her, and this is the first memory
I have. I'm almost five years old. We land to
the airport in Spokane, Washington, and he's
introducing me to my new family. And as he gets
to Barbara, he hands me to her. Of course, he
didn't know that I had been abused by the nuns
and the women at the orphanage. So here now I
finally have my daddy, and he's going to hand
me to this woman, and I start crying. And she
told me later, she said, that day you rejected
me, so I rejected you. Oh, no. And that was the
beginning of the 13 years. Wow. But what was
really beautiful about it was, I say, that's
my first memory. However, as I began to sit before
the Lord, because how that happened, it created
that spirit of rejection, the abandonment. And
the more you tell yourself a story, and that
story was told to me many times, it creates a
belief system, a pattern of belief. And that
belief then begins to shape your future and every
day how you look at things. And so I carried
with me that rejection, that abandonment, that
the loneliness, being the black sheep of the
family, all these things. But one day I was sitting
with the Lord and we were talking about stories.
And, you know, the law of polarity says there's
two sides to every story. And what that means
is, you know, you've never seen a one -sided
piece of bread. Or one -sided piece of a coin.
You know, there's two sides. That's the law of
polarity. So he said, if that's the story you've
been told, there must be another story. And I'm
thinking, no, that is the story. You know, that's
how deep my belief is. Like, that's the story.
You know, and sometimes we get so gripped with
the story that we don't have room to know, is
there another story? And somebody asked me that
one time. And I remember being so offended. It's
like, do you not believe me? That's my story.
And they said, but what if you had another story?
Wow. And so I sat with the Lord, and I wrestled
with this. I said, Lord, is there another story?
And he said, yes. And he said, but you have to
look for it. And so I went back in these times
with him, engaged him, and we sat together, and
he took me back to the beginning when I was born,
actually conceived, because my biological mother
was 16. And her father, my grandfather, was one
of those Catholic style, very religious, you
know, man of the law. And the fact that his daughter
was pregnant out of wedlock. And so now is that,
you know, it's like that wouldn't have been a
happy home for me, you know, and with all this,
the shame and stuff she would have gone through.
Sure. So I'm born. And then, of course, she couldn't
keep me in that family. So she gave me to my
biological dad when he's 17. So I'm looking and,
you know, seeing this, this is like a movie being
played in front of me. And so now he's 17. And
of course, I'm too young. I don't know what to
do with this little baby. And so hands him over
to his sister, his older sister, who was my aunt.
And so she took care of me until I was about
10 months old. And then I got really sick. and
diagnosed with polio and a severe case of tonsillitis.
And so now they find out the only medicine that's
available is at the orphanage. And so they take
me to the, she takes me, the aunt takes me to
the orphanage, and they said this baby's about
to die. That's how far gone I already was with
the sickness. And so as a last resort to save
my life, she said, let's admit her to the orphanage
then. if this is the only hope, because the medicine
there was for the orphans, and so the children
under their care. And they said, like, well,
we need her parents' signature. And this was
the story I was told, that my parents were in
prison. But she made up the story because they
could see I was on my deathbed. And so she said
that her parents are in prison, so I'm representing.
And they're like, okay, we'll take your signature.
And that's why I was handed over to the orphanage.
A very different story from what I was told when
nobody wants you. And then what was really, really
special was the Lord took me back and said, there's
more to the story because to deal with the abandonment
issue and that rejection. And so I went back
and this was how, you know, sometimes God shows
us things and then he asks us questions. And
it's in the questions. So going back, he said,
there's another story. because there's a redeeming
story to what I was feeling of rejection. And
I said, Lord, what's the redeeming story? Because
I don't know. I don't have any memories beyond
the airport when he's introduced me to the new
family. And so I'm thinking back, and all of
a sudden I remembered my adopted parents told
me their side of the story of the adoption. And
now the pieces are coming together because they've
had this hours magazine. It's called O -U -R
-S, an hours magazine. It was awaiting children.
And every child they had, there was a picture,
there's their name, and then there's a description
of them. For every child, except for me, there
was no picture, there was no description, just
my name. And they said, that one, we'll take
that one. And so it would be a year long process.
And then my dad got out, my adopted dad would
get on the airplane, fly over to Bolivia, that
long trip. And he gets to the orphanage, you
know, now he's excited. He's going to meet his
daughter, you know, it would be almost five years
old. And he gets there, meets the people of the
orphanage. They take him down the hallway and
to where I'm at. And instead of seeing this vibrant,
almost five year old, he sees this child about
the size of a two year old. on the floor, crawling
on the dirt floors. And just astonished, she's
like, and he looked back at the people, the staff,
and said, ¿Qué problema? Is there a problem?
Why can't she not walk? ¿Por qué? And they're
like, no, no, no, no, problema. You know, she
just doesn't want to walk today. Oh. He did not
know that I couldn't walk. You couldn't walk.
I couldn't walk. And so he walks over to me,
kneels down, and he looks at my little feet.
And he said to himself, this baby has never walked.
And in that moment, he had every right to get
up and go back because that was not what they
had agreed to and all of these things. That's
why there was no description. Right. Right. And
so instead, in that moment, he picked me up and
he says, I'm taking her home. And that's when
the Lord showed me that he chose you and you
were chosen. And so to know that he actually,
despite not knowing my history, despite not,
you know, considering all the medical treatment
I would need, anything like that, he said, I'm
going to give you a second chance. And that's
what Jesus gives for all of us, that second chance.
So now I know what it feels like to be adopted
in, to be grafted in, to be chosen. Beautiful.
Beautiful. So that's how my beginning started
into understanding, number one, there's always
two sides to our story if you look for it. And
that began the healing process as I began then
my journey in the Lord. Wow. That's so beautiful.
Yeah. So continue with your journey in the Lord.
You've made it to Montana. You're growing up.
Then what happened? Then when I was about seven
years old. Now, like I said, we grew up in an
Assemblies of God faith. But it was the letter
of the word because, you know, we got whippings
every day for whatever reasons. And it was always
the scripture, you know, spoil the child. Spare
the rod, spoil the child. Exactly. And that was
used all the time as a reason why we got beaten
so many times. But God had his hand on me. Nonetheless,
because there was something really, really special
he did. Because just knowing the journey I'd
be walking on, when I was eight years old, I
found my little brother's accordion. And it was
just this black, shiny instrument. And I'd watch
him play it. It was just this little Horner black
accordion. And I loved the sound. And so I'd
ask my parents, can I learn to play the accordion?
Because every child had to have some kind of
music, whether it was voice or piano. But here
he had the accordion. I was like, I like the
accordion. And they're like, no, you're just
trying to copy your brother. You go to the piano.
Oh, my. So I'm like, okay, so I'll learn to play
a piano. Did they have the block to get the pedals
where your feet could reach? I sat on a phone
book, you know, those big yellow pages with the
phone book. That was me sitting on top of that
to, you know, reach the keys. So my legs just
dangled, you know, just because I was so small,
I couldn't reach the pedals. So I would sit and
practice the piano. And then, but every day it's
like, you know, can I play the accordion? They
kept saying no. Finally, eight months later,
they finally like, okay. I could play the recording
because they could see the progress I had made
on the piano. And so I caught up to where my
brother was, and I also had really nimble fingers,
so I was fast. And I think my brother didn't
like that so much because he's like, I just like
the slow Western songs. And so later I would
learn that that was my... way of escape from
all the trauma I was going through. And so that,
that just the Lord protected me because later
I found out, you know, out of all, you know,
12 of us that were adopted, uh, they had six
biological children and then adopted 12. I was
the only one that didn't end up in a mental institution
or in prison. That's how bad those 13 years were.
But, and I go back and say, why, you know, other
than God's hand on me, but it was the music.
Because I would spend hours in my room practicing.
And I could be away and start honing this gift
that God gave me. And so as I journeyed through,
that became my voice. Because growing up, we
weren't allowed to question authority. We weren't
allowed to have our own opinions, thoughts. We
were told what to believe. We were told what
to say. We were told everything. It was like
robots. But my music became my voice. Yeah. And
so actually all the way up to college, they actually
made a degree for me for the accordion. They
just said, hey, we'll give you two years. You
prove to us this is a classical instrument. Oh,
look at that. Yeah. And so I was like, OK, you
know, we can do this. And so, you know, I told
him about a teacher in Spokane because I competed
at a competition with his students. So I knew
he was, you know, he was good. And he took me
on through, and at that two years, I had to perform
in front of the entire music faculty. And they
had, you know, some of them like, oh, this is
going to be interesting, you know, sitting up
there with their arms folded, like this is an
accordion, it's polkas, you know, what could
you do? And so I had to play three pieces, and
the last one was a Baroque piece. A toccatina
and fugue. So the right hand is doing a melody,
the left hand is doing a melody. And so you can't,
you typically hear the accordion as that, you
know, rhythmic and all of that. And this was
now more like the organ music, you know, think
of Bach. Good for you. So I played that. So did
you come up with that on your own? Well, my teacher,
you know, because it's classical, you've got
to play all the classical, you know, Baroque
music. And so the last one to win over was my
choir teacher. And he's like, he said, after
that tangatina and fugue, he said, I'm like,
I give up. What can she not play on that accordion?
And so they granted the degree and said, okay,
give you another two years. So I graduated with
an accordion performance degree and a music ed
degree for choral and band. Tremendous. So that
was the music part of me. About seven years later,
I met another teacher who was able to put a language
to all the music I learned as a growing up. Because
I didn't know what I was doing, really. But she's
like, huh. This is called this in technique,
which is now I could start doing it intentionally.
And then she just prepared me for the world championships.
Because I wanted to take my own students to the
highest level they could, but I never wanted
to take somebody I've never been. You know, where
some, you know, take them where I've never been.
And so I went through that to understand the
emotional pressures, you know, the physically
and all of that, you know. And so God had used
my music to not only keep me sane until those
times where I could experience his healing power
in him through my music. So let's back up now
to I'm 21. I'm almost out of college. So had
you done the championships yet? Not yet. Okay.
All right. I don't want to cut it short, but
I want to make sure we go there. So at 21, I'm
just about to graduate from college. And I'm
headed to Tacoma, Washington to spend the summer
with a couple that would take care of me during
the summer. And on the way, I just started getting
just this flood of tears began. And it's like,
I don't know what's going on. And at this time,
my family had really cut me off, mostly Barbara,
the adopted mother. And of course, the saying
was, if mama ain't happy, ain't nobody happy.
And so she trained us like if she wasn't happy
with somebody, we just cut them off. That was
just the norm. So I'm driving. And so I never
got to stop by the farm to say hello. And all
of a sudden, the only thing I could think of
on that drive was a five -hour drive with my
dad. And so it's like, wow, I wish I could, I
just could see him. I don't know why everything,
everything I saw reminded me of him. And I'm
like sobbing in my car now, thinking what in
the heck is going on, you know? I even stopped
by a gas station and I'm fumbling with the whatever.
And a guy came up and he said, let me help you.
And he puts fuel in my gas tank. And I watch
him like, that's exactly what my dad would have
done. Not knowing it was about that time. He
was killed in a work -related accident. Oh, no.
And I never saw him again. So you were thinking
of him because it was an eternal connection.
Yes, yes, because of that choice that he made.
Because people often ask me, like, why do you
carry on the last name Bartow? Because of all
the abuse that you went through, why carry that
tradition? You could change his name. And I said,
no, because of that one decision my dad made.
For that decision, I will always honor him. So
that began this, this fall of depression because
now my dad is gone, you know, and whatever what
he was or wasn't, he was still my dad. Sure.
You know, so. It went down to, like, I didn't
know what I wanted to do. You know, my adopted
mother said I had, number one, religiously flipped,
you know, and that I didn't choose the right
degree. I should have never gone into music.
And so all these things, I was kind of confused.
Like, but music is, you know, I've got the degree
now, right? So anyway, so I'm headed. I had one
more semester to do. Even though I graduated,
I had one semester of student teaching. And so
I'm back at the campus. And I was always known
as the smiling one. I was always happy because
I was free on campus. I was the social butterfly.
Back on the farm, I was this introvert. You just
do what you're supposed to do. I didn't know
how bad my upbringing was. until I'm in a class
on college about, and it's called Abusing Neglect.
Because when you are certified to the state of
Washington, now you've got to know what it looks
like and to report it to the state. Oh my. And
so I'm watching them right on the whiteboard,
all these things, all these signs to watch for,
and thinking, dear Lord, that was my life. Wow.
And I didn't know, because as a kid, you don't
know what's going on. Yeah, you've got nothing
to compare to. Exactly. And I'm thinking, wow,
I had a messed up childhood. Wow. So I thought,
okay, that's interesting. Anyway, so now I'm
in this depression state, and I don't know what
to do. And I'm pretty much lost, because now
no family, no connections. And I was at a worship
service on campus. It was a Presbyterian -based
university. And I said, God, I need help. I don't
know what to do. I need help. And that week I
got this postcard in the mail about this healing
crusade that's happening in Boise, Idaho. And
everything in my heart just leapt. I'm like,
I want to go. I want to go. And so I thought,
well, let me just take the first step. But I
didn't even have to take the first step. I got
a notification from my boss saying, hey, by the
way, we're going to be closed this Thursday,
Friday, and Saturday, so you're free, you know,
whatever you need to do, extra homework. I said,
really? Because it was the same week as this
healing crusade. And then I go to class and find
out all my classes have been canceled, except
for my choir concert. And I'm thinking, oh, my
goodness. It's like God was clearing out the
calendar. And then I was talking to a friend
of mine. I was telling her, I was like, yeah,
I'm going to go to Boise, Idaho. And she said,
oh, I'm from Boise. And I said, you never told
me that. And she said, yeah. In fact, I'm going
to a friend's for the weekend. So she said, you
can stay at my house. We've got extra bedroom.
You can stay there. In fact, my dad took a week
off. From from work so he can take you to and
from the crusade. It was a healing crusade So
I said great and now I'm starting to shake looks
I'm like this is real like God's about to do
something Real and I didn't know what to think
about it. But so now the last block was my choir
teacher Yeah, I was president of the woman's
choir and it was going to be our first concert
Oh boy, and it was doing the healing crusade
And so I go up really quietly to his office,
knock on the door. And, you know, because I was
such a timid girl, I never spoke up for myself,
didn't have a voice. The music was my accordion
was my voice. So I got there and I say, Mr. Pretty,
that's his name, Mr. Pretty. And he said, yeah,
what do you want? I just came to tell you that
I'm going to be missing the choir concert. And
he's like, why? I said, because. I'm going to
a healing crusade. He just looked at me and he's
like, and what am I going to tell the women,
the women's choir, all of them, that their president
is not attending the first concert of the year?
And all of a sudden, just something in me just
rose up. Because remember, I don't have a voice.
I can never speak up for myself. And just came
up and I said, you tell them it wasn't your decision.
And I'm like, class of my mouth, because I'm
like, oh my gosh, I just talked back to my teacher,
and now I'm being in big trouble. Because if
you miss one concert, your grade is automatically
dropped a letter. And at this point, I was a
straight -A student. And he's like, good answer,
good answer. He said, you know, I've always wanted
to go to one of these healing crusades. He said,
well, I'll tell you what, you go. You have my
blessing to go. Was he a believer? Well, he knew
about Jesus and all that. I don't know how deep
his relationship was, you know. And so I'm getting
ready to leave. And he says, by the way, I won't
dock you a letter grade. Wow. Just tell me how
it goes and I hope you get off those crutches.
Wow. I had never seen the divine hand of God
in a situation. And this was that. And I get
there, and 15 ,000 people. I'd never been in
a crowd that big. They're all worshiping God,
and I'm thinking, this is amazing. So I raise
my hands, and I'm worshiping with them, just
watching what they do, like I'll do the same
thing. And there was a moment where the evangelist,
I was thinking that the atmosphere, the air is
so thick. I'd never tangibly felt that before.
And as soon as I thought that, the evangelist
said, the presence of God is so thick right now.
And I'm like, this is you, God? Like, you can
be tangibly felt? And I was like, I didn't know
that. Because I had grown up in the religious
part, not a relationship part. And that was the
beginning when God began to heal my heart because
I got to experience him as the loving God that
he is, not the picture that I was presented growing
up. Because a lot of us as kids, our parents,
how we see our parents can be also translated
to how we see God. Exactly. And so I didn't know
about love. Like the words, I love you was never
mentioned in my household. You know, I had to
ask for a hug. And at that, you know, it was
a side hug, you know, so pretty deprived in some
areas. But God, you know, as he began to show
me his love and begin that healing process and
that journey. Now I look at it and it's just
like that. You know, he's so amazing. So when
I come to the schools with Bruce and Reshma,
it's just an honor to get to stand there and
I'm a living testimony of his love. Absolutely.
And I get to speak about his love and get to
speak about him as faith. Wow. Yeah, so it could
go on and on. But that was kind of that part
of the story of how I got to where I'm at today.
Wow. Wow. So then what happened with the accordion?
Oh, the accordion. So I met this lady, actually
heard her through another, one of my students.
And she had asked me to play for her wedding.
And she's not a believer. This is a special story.
She's not a believer, but I had wanted to always
work on my technique as a musician. And so...
played for her wedding, and then she asked me
to play for a French concert. And that was really
fun. And then we never heard anything, no communication.
And then a student calls up and says, hey, what
do you know about the Taubman technique? And
I'm thinking, Dorothy Taubman? How do you know
about this technique? Because I had seen it,
but it was like over $1 ,000 to purchase her
training on piano technique. And so I was saving
up money every month, just a little bit at a
time, because that was a lot of money for me
back then. He said, yeah, Kendall Feeney was
talking about it. And I was like, Kendall? He's
like, yeah. And this is the lady I was playing
with for her wedding and her French concert.
And so I called Kendall up. I didn't even say,
how are you? I said, Kendall, you teach this
technique? And she said, yeah, I teach it. And
I'm like, I want to start lessons ASAP. Wow.
And so I was, what, probably 31? In 2007. I don't
even know how old I was, but 2007. And so I began
training with her and she put a language to what
I was doing in music because nobody could understand
or tell me because they're like, no, no, no,
you just play that. But they couldn't explain
it to me. Even my university teacher, she would
play some diddle on the piano and came alive.
And I said, how did you do that? She said. I
just did this. And like, I know, but what's that
called? Because I could hear something behind
it. And she said, I don't know how to explain
that. You know, I just played it. I was like,
okay. And I was continuing on in the music and
people would say, like, you just do something
with music. But it's obvious you don't know what
you're doing. It just comes out of you. I'm like,
I wish somebody could tell me what I'm doing.
And that was when Kendall stepped in. And she
said, this is a technique called this. Now let
me help you use it intentionally and do it even
more in what you were doing. And that just took
me a whole nother level. And so I had known about
the world championships and I said, I want to
compete there. And so she said, okay. She said,
I've never played the accordion. I said, but
you're a musician. It's music to music, regardless
of your instrument. And so she's like, game on,
I'll do it. And so she helped me with the artistry.
And then I flew to France and studied with Frederic
Deschamps, who he's known for producing world
champions. And so I studied with a month with
him. We were practicing up to 16 hours a day.
And then one week before we're leaving for Italy
to compete, he's timing my program because you
have to be within minutes. And contrasting styles
of pieces, technical, lyrical, all these things.
And he said, oops, we're short three minutes.
Uh -oh. And I'm like, Fred, what are we going
to do? He said, you've got to learn another piece.
I said, in one week? He said, I mean, because
at a championship level, those pieces are not
simple. Right. He said, we've got one week. I
said, okay, what am I playing? And he pulled
out a piece of music, and he said this one. It's
four pages long. I think we can learn it quick
enough. I said, okay. So back to the practice
room. Now I'm nervous. I should say. So seven
-day countdown. Day four. I'm in the lessons,
and the Russian competitor, we're going to be
competing against each other. The Italian competitor,
the German competitor, we're all in the same
house, in the same place, studying with the same
teacher. We know we're all competing against
each other. So the Russian candidate comes and
sits and listens to my lesson on this piece.
And he's like, Fred. And he said, what? He's
like, are you sure? That's how bad it must have
sounded. Fred's like, you know what? Patricia
likes a challenge. And I like a challenge. Yeah,
so this is going to be all right. Wow. I'm thinking,
okay, that's day four. Day five. Day six, I'm
finally getting it memorized. Not full speed.
Of course, now day seven, we're traveling. And
so getting it together. And there's two rounds.
So they eliminate a lot of people in the first
round. And so I made it into the second round.
Now it's against the Russian that was there,
the Italian, the German, myself. So we're heading
in one at a time. I walk in, and it's a panel
of judges, seven men. standing there, black suits.
And I thought, this is a friendly crowd. So I
sit down. They carry, I have a 24 -pound concert
accordion. I sit there. I'm like, I am not playing
for them. I'm going to play for the crowd. That's
how I grew up playing, you know, play for them.
And so I sit there, and the final round, and
of course, this new piece, made it through. Goodness,
that was a moment. And came in third place. It
was Russia. Italy, and U .S. But what it did
was not only got my championship title, was that
it opened the doors internationally for me for
the music world at the highest level because
all the different countries were standing there
because once U .S. was announced that it was
going to be present. A lot of the other countries
came together to see because U .S. had not been
represented in decades. I'm sure. And then it
was a female. Right. Because accordion is such
a physical instrument. It's more male predominant.
But you have such upper body strength because
of the crutches and all getting around. Yeah.
Just getting in and out of things. I watched
you the first time getting into the car. At the
airport. At the airport. And it's like, okay,
she's got this. She knows exactly what she's
doing. She's been doing this a long time. Yes.
Yeah, I got this drink. And so because it opened
those doors. And I wasn't tied to the political
arena in the U .S. because in everything there's
the politics. And so they're like, did you not
represent your country through the legal channels?
I'm like, I didn't even know. I needed to go
through one of the associations in the U .S.
And I'm so glad I didn't because then they would
own me. I did this because I wanted to. prepare
the way for my students wow you know and so i
didn't know that i didn't know you know to go
to a teacher by myself and to do that and so
and the fact that i played international music
it wasn't just like the stuff from u .s they
said we've never had a u .s candidate you know
even back then play any of our music wow and
but i'm like well thankfully i had an international
teacher frederick who gave me some of that repertoire
and i'm like i liked it let's do it And it opened
up so many doors. And then I was invited to be
one of the juries for the World Championships.
Wow. So it's my claim to fame because they called
us by our country. You know, Mr. Germany, Mr.
Italy, Mr. Portugal, Miss USA. Wow. That's right.
My fun moment there. So it was just a way that
God opened the door to speak to those people
and be more of a light to them because it's more
of a worldly setting. One of our worship leaders,
Clarence, he studied at ORU and they had a European
teacher. And he was very strict. And he says,
no, I want to teach you something different.
I want to teach you. where you will always have
one finger on a key at all times so you will
know where you're at. And that has been such
a blessing because he can just... Talk and worship
while he's playing, you know, and I thought.
And keep his eyes closed. And keep his eyes closed.
Yeah. You know, and that was because of this
European teacher that, you know, is not always
very nice. Yes, I was. You know, I nearly quit
my degree three times because the teacher I had
for the accordion was Estonian. Estonian. And
so it was like every week I left lessons in tears.
And so about that two -year mark, I was like,
I can't do this anymore. And I was playing for
a function in Portland. And this little lady
came up to me. And I'd known her for many years.
And she put her arm around me and said, Patricia,
how's accordion going? And I looked at her and
I said, because it's like I couldn't lie. But
I didn't know anything positive to say. I said,
I don't like it anymore. And she knew the teacher.
And she said, you know what? Remember all the
fun you had with it. And she said, you can do
anything for two more years. Two more years.
And I thought, true, you know. Okay. And so because
of her, just that moment, you know, continued
on. Just the encouragement to continue on. Wow.
Yeah. So it's been quite a journey that way.
Isn't it amazing, though, to come from an orphanage
with polio. On your deathbed as a baby, through
a whole lifetime, a childhood of abuse, not knowing
you're being abused, God taking you to where
you find that there's more, that God really cares
for you, and he plunges you into this championship.
Now, come on. That's like a Cinderella story.
You know, it really is. It's something that's
beyond beyond. Like, is that really true? Could
that really be true? Yes. Yes. This is a true
story. And I'm thinking that there's a listener
or two or more that have had tragic experiences
in their lives that have caused them to feel
rejected or have caused them to maybe they've
gone through abuse. But I just want to ask you
as a champion. And God has brought you through
into a champion from the world's point of view
and to bring you into this place in God where
you're stepping through the veil into the unseen
realm. We're talking about the supernatural.
We're talking about believing God for these things
that he wants to do in these last days to show
himself glorious. And of course, it's not the
counterfeit. It's the real thing. where he's
using people to show his glory at his command,
not at our own ideas. Oh, I want to really do
that. No, it's God says, okay, it's time for
you to do this. Would you pray for our listeners?
Because I feel like you can be an encourager
in the spirit to some people that need some encouragement,
or maybe, listener, maybe you know somebody that
needs encouragement, and you can share this with
them. But there's a moment right here, right
now, where you can step through into a place
of overcoming. Would you pray? Yes. Father, we
just come before you. And right now, Father,
I just gather your listeners, those that are
listening, and just crying out to you for their
hope, that promise. And Lord, as you step through
the veil that you tore, that we have free access
to through Jesus. And Father, every heart that
has been broken, every betrayal, every rejection,
every loss. Father, you know every detail. Yes.
And Lord, we just take it right now and bring
it to the foot of the cross. And Father, we lay
it down so it can die. And Father, by faith,
I just take all of that, all those lost things
that people thought they have lost. And Lord,
laid into the grave. And Father, for the wounds
that have been all the cuts and those broken
places, Lord, we just apply the balm of Gilead
over that. And Lord, and now just apply the power
of your resurrection to each one of those wounds
so that they can rise up in your strength. They
can rise up into the destiny that you've called
them. They can rise up to see your... your hand
of salvation, your hand of glory, that as you
look upon them, you draw them to you, that you
reflect to them and they can reflect back to
you. Father, that love is what conquers all.
Father, love is what brings healing. And as you
hold them in your heart, Father, and just bless
the listeners, Lord, that they can take this
step. All it is is just a step of faith. And
Lord, I just pray, Father, That they may know
you. Yes, Lord. That they may know you in the
power of the resurrection. Yes, Lord. Lord, that
they will have this depth understanding of your
love for them. As you have loved me, Father,
as you chose me from the beginning when everybody
told me I was rejected. But, Father, that you
brought truth. And truth will always stand because
it's Jesus. Thank you, Father. Yes, Father. Amen.
Amen. If you enjoyed today's podcast, please
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Until next time, this is Sharon Buss. And I'm
Philip Buss. God bless you with His overwhelming,
loving presence.