WEBVTT 00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:01.980 Welcome to a very special Christmas Day episode 00:00:01.980 --> 00:00:04.360 of the 40s Formula. If you're listening as a 00:00:04.360 --> 00:00:06.759 woman in her 40s who's doing all the things for 00:00:06.759 --> 00:00:09.240 everyone else and quietly wondering, is this 00:00:09.240 --> 00:00:12.160 really it? Then this episode is for you. Because 00:00:12.160 --> 00:00:14.980 today, instead of one guest, we've pulled together 00:00:14.980 --> 00:00:17.920 a collection of powerful moments from women who 00:00:17.920 --> 00:00:20.579 have sat where you are, felt what you're feeling, 00:00:20.719 --> 00:00:23.300 and asked the same questions that you might be 00:00:23.300 --> 00:00:25.379 asking in this season of life. At the end of 00:00:25.379 --> 00:00:28.100 every conversation, we ask our guest one simple 00:00:28.100 --> 00:00:31.019 but meaningful question. What's your 40s formula? 00:00:31.280 --> 00:00:33.880 And their answers? They're honest, layered and 00:00:33.880 --> 00:00:36.520 real. They speak about boundaries, confidence, 00:00:36.880 --> 00:00:40.880 health, identity shifts, relationships, rediscovering 00:00:40.880 --> 00:00:43.719 purpose and learning to choose themselves without 00:00:43.719 --> 00:00:45.659 guilt. So if you're feeling a little stretched 00:00:45.659 --> 00:00:47.960 thin, a little invisible or even just reflective 00:00:47.960 --> 00:00:50.520 as another year comes to a close, consider this 00:00:50.520 --> 00:00:53.759 your invitation to pause, to listen and to start 00:00:53.759 --> 00:00:56.060 shaping your own version of what life in your 00:00:56.060 --> 00:00:58.439 40s could look like. And if this episode resonates, 00:00:59.020 --> 00:01:00.700 we would love for you to share it with another 00:01:00.700 --> 00:01:02.920 woman who needs to hear that she is not alone 00:01:02.920 --> 00:01:05.420 in this phase of life. And if you've been finding 00:01:05.420 --> 00:01:07.920 comfort, clarity, or inspiration in these conversations, 00:01:08.239 --> 00:01:10.480 the biggest gift you can give to us this Christmas 00:01:10.480 --> 00:01:12.780 is to follow the podcast and leave a quick review. 00:01:13.140 --> 00:01:15.780 It truly helps us reach more women like you. 00:01:16.219 --> 00:01:18.500 And you can also come and say hello on our Instagram 00:01:18.500 --> 00:01:22.019 at at the 40s formula, where we share behind 00:01:22.019 --> 00:01:24.739 the scenes moments, real talk, and updates on 00:01:24.739 --> 00:01:27.879 upcoming episodes and events. So wherever you 00:01:27.879 --> 00:01:29.810 are today, whether you're surrounded by family 00:01:29.810 --> 00:01:32.549 or carving a moment just for yourself, we hope 00:01:32.549 --> 00:01:35.109 this episode feels like a gentle reminder that 00:01:35.109 --> 00:01:39.689 your story still matters. Merry Christmas. But 00:01:39.689 --> 00:01:41.250 there is one thing that I say quite often, which 00:01:41.250 --> 00:01:43.969 I think answers it, which is that nothing exceptional 00:01:43.969 --> 00:01:46.950 ever comes from a comfort zone. And I believe 00:01:46.950 --> 00:01:50.030 that so entirely. And it helps me every day, 00:01:50.129 --> 00:01:54.030 literally every day, because it's not easy. life 00:01:54.030 --> 00:01:57.109 is not easy parenting is not easy doing this 00:01:57.109 --> 00:02:00.209 work that I absolutely love and I'm so grateful 00:02:00.209 --> 00:02:02.069 I get to do it and I know it looks super glamorous 00:02:02.069 --> 00:02:03.790 on social media and I am so grateful I can't 00:02:03.790 --> 00:02:05.670 even tell you how grateful I am but it's really 00:02:05.670 --> 00:02:07.890 hard right it's really really hard it's really 00:02:07.890 --> 00:02:09.430 hard to leave my daughter at four in the morning 00:02:09.430 --> 00:02:11.110 and have to replace me with a teddy bear and 00:02:11.110 --> 00:02:12.870 then she wakes up at ten to six and calls me 00:02:12.870 --> 00:02:14.289 at the airport that's really hard right it's 00:02:14.289 --> 00:02:16.789 really hard to travel around alone and land in 00:02:16.789 --> 00:02:18.789 cities that you don't know and all of these things 00:02:19.469 --> 00:02:21.069 It's really hard to not know where your money's 00:02:21.069 --> 00:02:22.710 coming from when you're building a business and 00:02:22.710 --> 00:02:24.530 you've got cash flow challenges and all of those 00:02:24.530 --> 00:02:27.530 things. But we don't talk about it. But what 00:02:27.530 --> 00:02:29.370 I always remind myself is, well, if it was easy, 00:02:29.449 --> 00:02:31.650 everybody would do it. If it was easy, it wouldn't 00:02:31.650 --> 00:02:33.389 be great. Because if it was easy, it would just 00:02:33.389 --> 00:02:37.789 be boring, right? Probably. So I think that's 00:02:37.789 --> 00:02:40.330 really powerful. I believe it's really true. 00:02:40.770 --> 00:02:42.830 I don't think anything exceptional comes from 00:02:42.830 --> 00:02:45.710 just being comfortable. I think we have to push 00:02:45.710 --> 00:02:48.069 ourselves and probably throughout our 40s, it's 00:02:48.069 --> 00:02:49.310 going to happen more and more and more because 00:02:49.310 --> 00:02:50.710 our children are going to grow, our bodies are 00:02:50.710 --> 00:02:53.909 going to change, life changes. But I also think 00:02:53.909 --> 00:02:55.969 that there are more women in their 50s and 60s 00:02:55.969 --> 00:02:59.110 thriving now than ever in history. So I feel 00:02:59.110 --> 00:03:01.610 like we have a lot to look forward to. I would 00:03:01.610 --> 00:03:05.349 say, I think as women in our 40s, we should stand 00:03:05.349 --> 00:03:09.310 in our power, you know. We used to probably prioritize 00:03:09.310 --> 00:03:12.650 other people or, you know, say yes too much. 00:03:12.810 --> 00:03:16.969 I think now is a time where we look inward and 00:03:16.969 --> 00:03:19.810 we look at that self -care and that's through 00:03:19.810 --> 00:03:23.090 the food choices that we make. And we stand in 00:03:23.090 --> 00:03:26.990 that. We own it. And it's that mindset change, 00:03:27.270 --> 00:03:30.590 really, that, you know, now it's about us, focusing 00:03:30.590 --> 00:03:33.370 on us. This is that time. And, you know, that 00:03:33.370 --> 00:03:36.110 40s also goes into that perimenopausal phase. 00:03:36.650 --> 00:03:39.189 And I love to use that word. It's perimenopause. 00:03:39.430 --> 00:03:43.550 Pause. Let's all stop and think and reflect and 00:03:43.550 --> 00:03:46.289 then move forward. I work with a lot of women 00:03:46.289 --> 00:03:49.449 who have experienced menopause, who are in that 00:03:49.449 --> 00:03:51.969 age and stage of life. And what I've noticed 00:03:51.969 --> 00:03:54.990 is most of them are under -muscled. We talk about 00:03:54.990 --> 00:03:57.349 body fat being high. That's a thing for sure. 00:03:57.870 --> 00:04:00.770 But I don't think being under -muscled gets enough 00:04:00.770 --> 00:04:04.780 recognition. And if we look at... preparing for 00:04:04.780 --> 00:04:08.060 the 40s and 50s and beyond what holds us in good 00:04:08.060 --> 00:04:11.879 stead and steed is having sufficient muscle mass 00:04:11.879 --> 00:04:15.599 again quality of life independence as you age 00:04:15.599 --> 00:04:19.839 healthy blood sugar relationship healthy metabolism 00:04:19.839 --> 00:04:22.120 everyone wants to blame menopause for their metabolism 00:04:22.120 --> 00:04:26.040 but if you enter menopause under muscled your 00:04:26.040 --> 00:04:28.439 metabolism stands no chance of course it's going 00:04:28.439 --> 00:04:32.000 to be complete shit show so muscle mass muscle 00:04:32.000 --> 00:04:34.279 mass muscle mass build the muscle as early as 00:04:34.279 --> 00:04:37.560 you can as often as you can and do not stop like 00:04:37.560 --> 00:04:40.759 just keep going turn up imperfectly and make 00:04:40.759 --> 00:04:43.459 that a habit I tell that to my clients all the 00:04:43.459 --> 00:04:45.600 time I'm like I can help anyone who turns up 00:04:45.600 --> 00:04:49.100 but I cannot do the turning up for you so you 00:04:49.100 --> 00:04:51.199 get here I don't care if you've had three hours 00:04:51.199 --> 00:04:53.500 of sleep I don't care if you haven't slept I 00:04:53.500 --> 00:04:55.240 don't care if your child is sick I mean I do 00:04:55.240 --> 00:04:58.139 I hope they get better soon That is irrelevant. 00:04:58.399 --> 00:05:00.399 You know, it's your health and fitness journey. 00:05:00.500 --> 00:05:04.160 So get good at turning up for yourself and keep 00:05:04.160 --> 00:05:09.160 turning up. And then protein. Lots of protein. 00:05:09.399 --> 00:05:12.420 All the protein you can. Creatine, great supplement. 00:05:12.660 --> 00:05:15.959 Love it. Five, six to ten. I think high doses 00:05:15.959 --> 00:05:18.740 of ten. We're studying and seeing great cognitive 00:05:18.740 --> 00:05:21.120 benefits. So love, love, love, love, love me 00:05:21.120 --> 00:05:25.199 some creatine. And just keep connecting with 00:05:25.199 --> 00:05:27.300 yourself because. It's easier for you to help 00:05:27.300 --> 00:05:29.680 yourself if you understand why you're not helping 00:05:29.680 --> 00:05:32.279 yourself or where you're not helping yourself, 00:05:32.540 --> 00:05:36.000 where you're not asking for help. So for me, 00:05:36.019 --> 00:05:38.079 it comes down to those three pillars. It's building 00:05:38.079 --> 00:05:40.339 muscle. It's getting enough protein in the diet. 00:05:40.860 --> 00:05:43.980 And it's unpacking your own relationship with 00:05:43.980 --> 00:05:45.800 yourself and continuing to evolve that because 00:05:45.800 --> 00:05:47.759 that only makes it easier to do the other two 00:05:47.759 --> 00:05:51.980 things time and time again. Don't be afraid to 00:05:51.980 --> 00:05:55.620 take your space. Yeah. You work for it. You earned 00:05:55.620 --> 00:05:58.019 it. You deserve it. So take this piece. Damn 00:05:58.019 --> 00:06:02.420 right. Get what you want. Yeah. I'm still figuring 00:06:02.420 --> 00:06:06.560 it out. What I've discovered so far is that it's 00:06:06.560 --> 00:06:11.360 so important to, if you want, to meet yourself 00:06:11.360 --> 00:06:15.980 and whatever vehicles that works best for you. 00:06:16.259 --> 00:06:20.120 For me, that's therapy. And I have come to treat 00:06:20.120 --> 00:06:25.259 therapy like going to the gym. And I used to 00:06:25.259 --> 00:06:28.420 only call my therapist when something happened 00:06:28.420 --> 00:06:31.459 instead of, you know, now we meet every two weeks, 00:06:31.560 --> 00:06:33.959 regardless if I have something to talk about 00:06:33.959 --> 00:06:37.560 or not. So whatever medium you want to use to 00:06:37.560 --> 00:06:40.720 meet yourself. And then I guess just asking yourself 00:06:40.720 --> 00:06:45.160 if all dimensions of you are really showing up 00:06:45.160 --> 00:06:47.680 in the way that you would like to show up. It's 00:06:47.680 --> 00:06:49.600 OK if you don't want all of them to show up, 00:06:49.620 --> 00:06:52.790 but I want all of me to show up. So I feel like 00:06:52.790 --> 00:06:56.069 I'm in my reinvention stage. I believe that the 00:06:56.069 --> 00:07:00.410 40s are where you ask all the questions and the 00:07:00.410 --> 00:07:03.790 50s is where, you know, apparently life is going 00:07:03.790 --> 00:07:06.689 to be really, really amazing. And then I'm looking 00:07:06.689 --> 00:07:09.769 at Melinda Gates in 60 and then Oprah at 70. 00:07:09.910 --> 00:07:13.470 Yes. And I'm like, yeah. So I'm looking at them 00:07:13.470 --> 00:07:16.110 going, OK, that's great. I think 40s is also, 00:07:16.170 --> 00:07:19.589 you know, the period of perimenopause for most 00:07:19.589 --> 00:07:22.800 women in the world. And this can really throw 00:07:22.800 --> 00:07:25.279 a spanner in the works and give you more questions 00:07:25.279 --> 00:07:29.879 to doubt yourself, right? So just remember that 00:07:29.879 --> 00:07:33.399 sometimes your hormones are playing a role, a 00:07:33.399 --> 00:07:36.680 major role in whatever lens that you're looking 00:07:36.680 --> 00:07:39.019 at life at, all the questions that you're asking. 00:07:39.100 --> 00:07:44.819 So definitely meet yourself, your health and 00:07:44.819 --> 00:07:49.160 your mental state. And I believe I learned this 00:07:49.160 --> 00:07:50.740 at the Hoffman process. You know, there's four 00:07:50.740 --> 00:07:54.920 parts to us, your physical body, your logical 00:07:54.920 --> 00:07:57.040 mind. That's the one that wants to do, do, do 00:07:57.040 --> 00:08:02.019 and be logical. Then your emotional child or 00:08:02.019 --> 00:08:06.160 self. So every day that person is different. 00:08:06.240 --> 00:08:09.459 Sometimes it's a child. You know, sometimes it's 00:08:09.459 --> 00:08:11.839 a five -year -old Uma that needs something sometimes 00:08:11.839 --> 00:08:18.040 is exactly who I am today. Uma 5 .0. Yeah, not 00:08:18.040 --> 00:08:20.720 yet, three years. The last part is your soul. 00:08:21.279 --> 00:08:24.079 So if you think of it as a horse carriage, the 00:08:24.079 --> 00:08:26.220 horse is the emotional child. It just wants to 00:08:26.220 --> 00:08:28.879 go and play, play with other horses, right? It 00:08:28.879 --> 00:08:31.360 doesn't want to be on the leash, right? And then 00:08:31.360 --> 00:08:33.539 the rider is the logical self, telling the child 00:08:33.539 --> 00:08:37.639 where to go. right and the entire carriage is 00:08:37.639 --> 00:08:41.980 the body but the passenger is your soul and your 00:08:41.980 --> 00:08:46.460 soul is telling the writer where to go yeah and 00:08:46.460 --> 00:08:50.200 i think i only found my soul recently yeah like 00:08:50.200 --> 00:08:52.700 i didn't know she was there so now i can see 00:08:52.700 --> 00:08:57.419 her yeah on most days so yeah i think 40s is 00:08:57.419 --> 00:09:01.480 like the best time ever for women it's the best 00:09:01.480 --> 00:09:04.279 and the hardest i think because you're somewhere 00:09:04.809 --> 00:09:07.370 where you got maybe some decent money, right? 00:09:07.490 --> 00:09:08.950 You've kind of figured out what you like, you 00:09:08.950 --> 00:09:12.470 don't like. Then your body is starting to send 00:09:12.470 --> 00:09:15.990 you signals and question yourself. But I think 00:09:15.990 --> 00:09:20.070 it's the great decade of being a questionologist 00:09:20.070 --> 00:09:24.769 for yourself. To focus on loving yourself more 00:09:24.769 --> 00:09:28.529 and putting yourself as a priority at this point 00:09:28.529 --> 00:09:30.990 is the perfect time because you're going to be 00:09:30.990 --> 00:09:35.360 learning how to live the future you. You already 00:09:35.360 --> 00:09:39.860 know that my avatar is almost like a director, 00:09:40.059 --> 00:09:44.460 right? And what I would say would be working 00:09:44.460 --> 00:09:48.820 for me, how I try to separate myself from productivity 00:09:48.820 --> 00:09:52.519 to trying to find my own identity is really to 00:09:52.519 --> 00:09:55.679 have that separation. And I like to describe 00:09:55.679 --> 00:10:00.200 it as be your own director for your own epic 00:10:00.200 --> 00:10:02.879 movie. The more you are able to then separate 00:10:02.879 --> 00:10:06.389 yourself. from your story. So look at yourself 00:10:06.389 --> 00:10:09.450 from outside. Find a different perspective. Give 00:10:09.450 --> 00:10:11.950 yourself a character. Give all your parts a character. 00:10:12.269 --> 00:10:14.450 So you're looking at yourself as a director and 00:10:14.450 --> 00:10:17.169 then all of a sudden that emotion doesn't feel 00:10:17.169 --> 00:10:21.090 so strong and you get more perspective. And then 00:10:21.090 --> 00:10:25.350 you will be able to perceive that life is not 00:10:25.350 --> 00:10:28.429 so hard. That there could be a different way 00:10:28.429 --> 00:10:30.549 to then touch on something, right? The football 00:10:30.549 --> 00:10:32.769 analogy. Do you know about this one? No, but 00:10:32.769 --> 00:10:34.750 I do love football. Tell me more. It depends 00:10:34.750 --> 00:10:35.710 which football you like. Yeah, I was going to 00:10:35.710 --> 00:10:38.070 say, actually, is this American football? I see 00:10:38.070 --> 00:10:40.610 you like leaning into the microphone. Okay, so 00:10:40.610 --> 00:10:42.870 the football analogy goes a little bit like this. 00:10:42.950 --> 00:10:46.250 So when you're a player in the field, right? 00:10:46.330 --> 00:10:50.950 Okay, soccer. I'll allow it. I'll allow it. Damn 00:10:50.950 --> 00:10:53.370 it. Now she's going to kick me out. It's okay. 00:10:53.669 --> 00:10:55.830 I'm British, so, you know, we play football. 00:10:55.870 --> 00:10:57.389 50 % of this audience understand. No, I'm just 00:10:57.389 --> 00:10:59.850 kidding. When you're a player in the field, you're 00:10:59.850 --> 00:11:04.539 really in it. Yo. Pushing in, you're reflexive. 00:11:08.100 --> 00:11:12.519 You're playing. You don't have time to think 00:11:12.519 --> 00:11:15.399 about keeping score. You're really in the game. 00:11:15.759 --> 00:11:19.879 You're there. You're present. But you're also 00:11:19.879 --> 00:11:21.980 feeling all the emotion and all the stress all 00:11:21.980 --> 00:11:24.980 at the same time. But then you think about yourself 00:11:24.980 --> 00:11:27.879 as a coach in the box. And all of a sudden, you're 00:11:27.879 --> 00:11:30.350 really far away, like a director. And you can 00:11:30.350 --> 00:11:32.529 see the plays on the fields. You can check out 00:11:32.529 --> 00:11:35.269 the strategy. You know how to rearrange players. 00:11:35.909 --> 00:11:37.889 And you know how to go at it from a different 00:11:37.889 --> 00:11:40.889 point of view. Let's talk about the people in 00:11:40.889 --> 00:11:43.850 the sidelines on the stands. Now, they are not 00:11:43.850 --> 00:11:47.210 in the game. They can comment. And they will 00:11:47.210 --> 00:11:52.110 keep score. Right? Not really the nice way either. 00:11:52.429 --> 00:11:54.230 Yep, you're right. But they're also supporters. 00:11:54.450 --> 00:11:57.509 And they're also there to cheer you on. Now, 00:11:57.629 --> 00:12:01.490 what about... in the helicopter, you know, the 00:12:01.490 --> 00:12:03.470 newscaster, giving you that bird's eye view. 00:12:04.769 --> 00:12:07.549 Now you're really far away. And all of a sudden, 00:12:07.590 --> 00:12:10.090 your problems are going to seem so small. And 00:12:10.090 --> 00:12:12.269 you have to, suddenly you have a little bit of 00:12:12.269 --> 00:12:15.610 space to go into awe, right? You're there to 00:12:15.610 --> 00:12:17.909 then just breathe a little, see it from bird's 00:12:17.909 --> 00:12:20.850 eye view, and all those pains just melt away. 00:12:21.049 --> 00:12:23.830 It's not so important anymore. So if you can 00:12:23.830 --> 00:12:26.490 think of yourself as a director, sometimes you're 00:12:26.490 --> 00:12:29.529 in the game. Sometimes you're in the box. Sometimes 00:12:29.529 --> 00:12:33.370 you're on the sidelines. They all have the, can 00:12:33.370 --> 00:12:36.970 I say, purpose, right? And they all have their 00:12:36.970 --> 00:12:40.289 seasons too, right? You can plan, you can see, 00:12:40.370 --> 00:12:42.809 you can strategize, and then you can be in the 00:12:42.809 --> 00:12:46.549 game. But don't forget to reflect. Get out of 00:12:46.549 --> 00:12:49.509 the game far away enough so that everything feels 00:12:49.509 --> 00:12:52.470 a little bit more sustainable. That's the word, 00:12:52.570 --> 00:12:55.909 sustainable. And find a different perspective. 00:12:56.590 --> 00:12:59.789 get in the chopper get the chopper once in a 00:12:59.789 --> 00:13:04.389 while be in it when you need to yes be the coach 00:13:04.389 --> 00:13:06.409 when you need to the manager when you need to 00:13:06.409 --> 00:13:08.490 sometimes you can make some comments you know 00:13:08.490 --> 00:13:11.769 like ah that was a fucking shit pass exactly 00:13:11.769 --> 00:13:15.309 but you know overall yeah take a step back and 00:13:15.309 --> 00:13:18.549 and take charge be in control yeah i mean there's 00:13:18.549 --> 00:13:21.750 so many choices out there and oh my gosh we're 00:13:21.750 --> 00:13:24.340 just gonna be Even more muddled with even more 00:13:24.340 --> 00:13:27.320 choices coming, you know, in the next, oh gosh, 00:13:27.399 --> 00:13:29.840 not even next year. Next few months, we're going 00:13:29.840 --> 00:13:32.480 to have like more improvements of AI, the more 00:13:32.480 --> 00:13:34.940 apps that we can actually use. We're going to 00:13:34.940 --> 00:13:38.740 be totally confused. So just take a step back. 00:13:39.600 --> 00:13:42.419 Go inside, not outside. That's where the noise 00:13:42.419 --> 00:13:45.860 is. Let the noise be there. Entertainment. And 00:13:45.860 --> 00:13:48.360 then just be a director and see where you want 00:13:48.360 --> 00:13:50.340 to go because it's not about productivity. It's 00:13:50.340 --> 00:13:53.470 not about... who or what we've achieved is about 00:13:53.470 --> 00:13:56.470 alignment. And we're supposed to just align ourselves 00:13:56.470 --> 00:13:59.250 a little bit every day. No pressure. Love it. 00:13:59.370 --> 00:14:03.450 Love it. Take that pressure away and take direction, 00:14:03.509 --> 00:14:06.149 take charge. Yeah, because you know what? Pen 00:14:06.149 --> 00:14:08.090 is in your hand and you can write your own script. 00:14:08.490 --> 00:14:11.009 That is the true story. The next chapter is yours, 00:14:11.110 --> 00:14:16.750 right? Own it. Be unapologetic. Why are we so 00:14:16.750 --> 00:14:21.399 afraid to... Say the word menopause. Yeah. You 00:14:21.399 --> 00:14:25.120 know, use the word. The more we use it, the more 00:14:25.120 --> 00:14:30.720 we normalize it. You know, we are giving you 00:14:30.720 --> 00:14:34.929 today important information. But you have a choice 00:14:34.929 --> 00:14:37.389 if you want to use that or not. And that's your 00:14:37.389 --> 00:14:41.429 choice. So you can use little bits of it. You 00:14:41.429 --> 00:14:43.610 can take the protein shake and not the creatine. 00:14:43.649 --> 00:14:46.629 You know, you will still be OK. Go and see the 00:14:46.629 --> 00:14:49.070 doctor if you need the help. Don't wait until 00:14:49.070 --> 00:14:52.730 it's too late. Do the strength training. Do ensure 00:14:52.730 --> 00:14:54.690 that you bank your bones because we are living 00:14:54.690 --> 00:14:57.450 longer and we do want to make sure that we have 00:14:57.450 --> 00:15:01.360 that. quality of life that our mothers don't 00:15:01.360 --> 00:15:04.419 my mom has osteoporosis she's 68 you know like 00:15:04.419 --> 00:15:08.080 I want to be 85 and still trying to do a chin 00:15:08.080 --> 00:15:10.820 up even though I can't but I still want the ability 00:15:10.820 --> 00:15:14.620 to try it's never too late but it's never too 00:15:14.620 --> 00:15:17.759 late ever and that's it it's never too late if 00:15:17.759 --> 00:15:21.320 you are listening and you're over 40 it's never 00:15:21.320 --> 00:15:24.919 too late if you're under 40 start learning and 00:15:24.919 --> 00:15:27.639 putting things in place now yeah There you go, 00:15:27.659 --> 00:15:30.080 girl. Preach, you know, use your youth, but also 00:15:30.080 --> 00:15:31.919 it's never too late, right? It's never too late 00:15:31.919 --> 00:15:34.519 to start. Your body is so incredible. I've had 00:15:34.519 --> 00:15:38.159 cancer twice. I'm 13 years in menopause. I've 00:15:38.159 --> 00:15:40.259 been through ups and downs and rounds and rounds. 00:15:40.360 --> 00:15:44.049 And honest to goodness. Your body is the most 00:15:44.049 --> 00:15:46.289 incredible, particularly women. Come on. Yes. 00:15:46.409 --> 00:15:50.129 Our bodies are superhuman. Superhuman. And if 00:15:50.129 --> 00:15:53.490 you treat it well, it will give you back. It's 00:15:53.490 --> 00:15:55.330 like a boomerang effect. If you look after it, 00:15:55.350 --> 00:15:57.269 it will look after you. All I want to say is, 00:15:57.350 --> 00:15:59.649 hello, everybody. My name is Jasmine. I'm 42 00:15:59.649 --> 00:16:03.190 years old and I'm in perimenopause. Hello, Jasmine. 00:16:03.549 --> 00:16:06.350 Oh, my girl. You're in the right circle for sure 00:16:06.350 --> 00:16:10.330 today. I would say 40s is when I think most of 00:16:10.330 --> 00:16:13.809 us start to feel a lot of. tension and um stress 00:16:13.809 --> 00:16:18.690 in our lives so for me what i would always recommend 00:16:18.690 --> 00:16:21.490 is to nourish your bodies with like proper food 00:16:21.490 --> 00:16:25.289 like proper proper food like no process and also 00:16:25.289 --> 00:16:28.490 not just the food but what you see what you read 00:16:28.490 --> 00:16:30.889 what you hear you know nourish that properly 00:16:30.889 --> 00:16:36.340 move daily right And sleep, right? Sleep deeply, 00:16:36.519 --> 00:16:39.200 right? I feel like we are a nation of people 00:16:39.200 --> 00:16:42.799 who don't have enough sleep. Yeah. So, but that's 00:16:42.799 --> 00:16:46.259 super, super, super important. So, yeah. Yeah, 00:16:46.299 --> 00:16:48.200 bring it back to being human. That's it. So, 00:16:48.200 --> 00:16:51.299 you know, eat well, sleep well, move well. Yep, 00:16:51.360 --> 00:16:54.340 totally. Be surprised at how good it feels to 00:16:54.340 --> 00:16:58.379 be a human being. Yes, absolutely. This is something 00:16:58.379 --> 00:17:03.379 that I tell myself all the time. Everything that 00:17:03.379 --> 00:17:07.380 I can see and touch is tangible, including how 00:17:07.380 --> 00:17:10.059 I look right now or a certain situation that 00:17:10.059 --> 00:17:12.980 I'm in. And so if it's tangible, it means it's 00:17:12.980 --> 00:17:15.240 subject to change, right? So it will never always 00:17:15.240 --> 00:17:18.359 be like that. So if I'm having a really bad time 00:17:18.359 --> 00:17:20.980 now or something really bad is happening. this 00:17:20.980 --> 00:17:23.240 too shall pass, right? So I won't always be in 00:17:23.240 --> 00:17:25.380 this situation. Or if I'm having, like, a great 00:17:25.380 --> 00:17:27.660 time, something really good, it will also pass. 00:17:27.900 --> 00:17:31.599 So it sort of, like, teaches me to, like, enjoy 00:17:31.599 --> 00:17:34.519 the moment and be in the present. So that is 00:17:34.519 --> 00:17:39.700 something that I'm still learning, like, to live 00:17:39.700 --> 00:17:41.359 by it. Yeah, but it's something I tell myself. 00:17:41.960 --> 00:17:45.059 I love that. Stay present, live in the now, and 00:17:45.059 --> 00:17:46.960 just know that everything, yeah, is temporary. 00:17:47.160 --> 00:17:52.460 It truly is. I would say energy wise, quality 00:17:52.460 --> 00:17:56.279 over quantity is my thing. So don't spread yourself 00:17:56.279 --> 00:17:59.859 too thin. I used to do it. Choose where you have 00:17:59.859 --> 00:18:02.460 to put your energy. Choose where you want to 00:18:02.460 --> 00:18:05.200 put your energy and put it there. And you will 00:18:05.200 --> 00:18:08.140 be so much happier because I was a people pleaser. 00:18:08.519 --> 00:18:11.400 I wanted to spread myself across whoever needed 00:18:11.400 --> 00:18:14.740 me. Not anymore. Now I just spend my time doing 00:18:14.740 --> 00:18:16.940 what I want to do with the people I want to do 00:18:16.940 --> 00:18:21.119 it with. Three things I would say. One is surround 00:18:21.119 --> 00:18:22.779 yourself with the right people that will lift 00:18:22.779 --> 00:18:24.599 you up because you don't have time for bullshit. 00:18:25.440 --> 00:18:27.779 I'm just going to call it. You just really, really 00:18:27.779 --> 00:18:30.220 don't have time for anything else. Cut out people 00:18:30.220 --> 00:18:33.400 that won't lift you. You don't need any of that. 00:18:33.599 --> 00:18:36.079 Number two, three key questions to ask yourself 00:18:36.079 --> 00:18:38.559 about anything that bothers you. Will you lose 00:18:38.559 --> 00:18:40.440 sleep? Will you lose money? Will it affect your 00:18:40.440 --> 00:18:42.180 health? The answer is no to all of it. Fuck it. 00:18:42.819 --> 00:18:44.599 you you really do have time for it right because 00:18:44.599 --> 00:18:46.799 i i just feel like we are so time starved as 00:18:46.799 --> 00:18:48.900 we get older and it's all i i feel like this 00:18:48.900 --> 00:18:51.119 is my underlying theme for this entire podcast 00:18:51.119 --> 00:18:54.599 which is like you know um prioritize oh and the 00:18:54.599 --> 00:18:57.000 third thing is um don't be afraid to prioritize 00:18:57.000 --> 00:18:59.259 yourself over others i think this is something 00:18:59.259 --> 00:19:01.700 we tend to lose ourselves trying to please others 00:19:01.700 --> 00:19:04.380 whether it's your partner or your boss or your 00:19:04.380 --> 00:19:09.099 friend but if you lose yourself then there's 00:19:09.099 --> 00:19:11.259 a risk you might never find yourself back. Or 00:19:11.259 --> 00:19:12.740 you have to go to great lengths to get yourself 00:19:12.740 --> 00:19:16.420 back. My mantra is I'm doing the best that I 00:19:16.420 --> 00:19:19.660 can given the resources that I have. Yeah. And 00:19:19.660 --> 00:19:23.640 that's okay. That is a formula. I mean, put that 00:19:23.640 --> 00:19:26.240 on a t -shirt, girl. I'm doing the best that 00:19:26.240 --> 00:19:28.759 I can given the resources that I have. And that's 00:19:28.759 --> 00:19:31.299 really the best that we can do, right? I think 00:19:31.299 --> 00:19:34.000 sometimes we often push ourselves to say, I need 00:19:34.000 --> 00:19:37.619 to do more, be more. And I get that. I get where 00:19:37.619 --> 00:19:40.200 that's coming from. But honestly, some days for 00:19:40.200 --> 00:19:43.059 me, my battery's flat. And if my battery's flat 00:19:43.059 --> 00:19:45.720 and I still show up doing something, that is 00:19:45.720 --> 00:19:49.640 100%. That is not 0%. Many people do not see 00:19:49.640 --> 00:19:52.000 it that way. But I think we need to live that 00:19:52.000 --> 00:19:54.680 way so that we're not so hard on ourselves. Yes. 00:19:55.660 --> 00:20:01.259 Well, for me, I feel the best at my current age, 00:20:01.359 --> 00:20:04.160 to be honest. Because I don't need to care about 00:20:04.160 --> 00:20:07.140 what people think. And I can be fully myself 00:20:07.140 --> 00:20:10.720 and unapologetically myself. And I don't have 00:20:10.720 --> 00:20:13.839 to prove to anyone my worth or who I am. And 00:20:13.839 --> 00:20:17.859 I'm just being very happy of who I am right now. 00:20:18.190 --> 00:20:21.009 So I think to be able to say, I have a mantra 00:20:21.009 --> 00:20:24.730 that I also teach my female clients is when you 00:20:24.730 --> 00:20:28.049 do your breath work, if you can't talk, you just 00:20:28.049 --> 00:20:30.630 have this mantra in your head. It's called I'm 00:20:30.630 --> 00:20:33.930 sovereign mantra. So it starts with I'm sovereign, 00:20:34.109 --> 00:20:38.569 I'm humble, I'm compassionate, and I'm surrendering 00:20:38.569 --> 00:20:41.910 to the present moment. So what I would say is 00:20:41.910 --> 00:20:45.630 while you're navigating perimenopause and menopause, 00:20:45.750 --> 00:20:50.730 see it as an opportunity to look at your health, 00:20:50.849 --> 00:20:55.849 your holistic health overall. Yes, absolutely. 00:20:56.670 --> 00:21:00.349 Get some help with your symptoms and improve 00:21:00.349 --> 00:21:02.789 your quality of life. But look at the bigger 00:21:02.789 --> 00:21:05.289 picture. Think about those long -term health 00:21:05.289 --> 00:21:07.210 risks that are silent, that you may not feel. 00:21:07.809 --> 00:21:11.589 Educate yourself about them. Get tested. Know 00:21:11.589 --> 00:21:14.869 what your risks are for them. And there is plenty 00:21:14.869 --> 00:21:18.049 you can do out there to minimize those risks. 00:21:18.329 --> 00:21:21.549 Look at those six pillars or six cogs of health 00:21:21.549 --> 00:21:26.859 and see. What is important to you right now? 00:21:26.920 --> 00:21:29.799 Where are you ready to make some changes that 00:21:29.799 --> 00:21:34.519 will be sustainable? And think about what kind 00:21:34.519 --> 00:21:36.619 of life would you like to have in your last 10 00:21:36.619 --> 00:21:38.519 years of your life? You know, women are living 00:21:38.519 --> 00:21:41.779 till into their 80s, 90s. We want to remain well 00:21:41.779 --> 00:21:44.519 and healthy and do the things we enjoy and love 00:21:44.519 --> 00:21:49.400 and be independent for as long as possible. So 00:21:49.400 --> 00:21:53.910 that would be my message to women. I think for 00:21:53.910 --> 00:21:58.890 me, that has to be sleep. I certainly went through 00:21:58.890 --> 00:22:02.890 my twenties and thirties in a job where I often 00:22:02.890 --> 00:22:06.410 didn't get as much sleep as I needed. And I thought 00:22:06.410 --> 00:22:10.650 that was fine. And in my forties, I discovered 00:22:10.650 --> 00:22:13.470 that it's really not fine. So I'd just say sleep, 00:22:13.509 --> 00:22:19.750 sleep, sleep, make it a priority because I think 00:22:19.750 --> 00:22:23.119 certainly for me, When I've had enough sleep, 00:22:23.359 --> 00:22:26.940 anything is possible. When I'm sleep deprived, 00:22:27.359 --> 00:22:29.940 everything becomes a struggle. And that's so 00:22:29.940 --> 00:22:33.440 common for so many women, I think, in midlife. 00:22:33.759 --> 00:22:35.759 Yeah, you got that right. We're preaching the 00:22:35.759 --> 00:22:39.059 same gospel. I promise you. Yeah, you don't have 00:22:39.059 --> 00:22:40.660 to tell me to sleep twice or three times.