WEBVTT

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It's not just money that women don't talk about

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openly. It's what we were talking about right

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now, that we need space that is our own and it's

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away from our kids. Like we feel a lot of shame

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just saying that as well. What you don't want

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to be. You just said it and it made me nervous.

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I was like, oh, what if someone thinks we don't

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love our kids? Yeah, we do, we love you. It's

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like what you're saying, you don't want to be

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with your kids all the time. Yes, I don't want

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to be with them all the time. Did I stutter?

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and welcome to The 40s Formula, your go -to place

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for insightful discussions on navigating your

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40s and thriving in this transformative decade.

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We're your hosts, Amanda and Jasmine, two women

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that are passionate about exploring the challenges

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and adventures that come with turning 40 and

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what lies ahead. independent board director,

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and professional speaker. She is also the owner

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and CEO of Launchpad, the kindest community of

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entrepreneurs on the internet. With over 18 years

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of work experience across startups, SMEs, and

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MNCs like Shell, Sephora, and Meta, Megha has

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worked in a variety of roles and built vibrant

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communities across multiple industries. She has

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a master's degree in mass communication and loves

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the arts, word, visual, and motion. A mother

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to two boys, she is currently working on her

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first book and serves as a trustee on the board

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of the Swayam Foundation, an NGO that is creating

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learning and work opportunities for people in

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India. Well, y 'all are in for a serious treat

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just getting to listen to our guest's voice today.

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I love it so much. The amazing Megha Singh is

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here to enlighten us on everything from small

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business growth to empowering women to forge

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better relationships with money, like everything

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entrepreneurial women need to know. in their

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40s so thank you so much for being here mega

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thank you for having me amanda and jasmine can

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we talk about the fact that women are out here

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starting businesses not having addressed their

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fears and uncertainties about money and just

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kind of sweeping that under the rug they don't

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know how to ask for it how to make it how to

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spend it where do you start With your female

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entrepreneur clients, how do you start the conversation

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about money? Honestly, it's a great thing that

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they're starting without knowing about managing

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money, because it's just one of the things that

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you don't know when you start a business. And

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it's good that if we are starting a business,

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we don't let anything block us. So I am in favor

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of like taking action. Just put it out there.

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Let's see how it goes. I think how I begin the

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conversations with money is rather than me. Me

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starting the conversation, I have them speak

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to me about different aspects, like how are they

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thinking of pricing their products and services?

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How do they check their monthly accounts? And

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on the basis of their responses, I'm able to

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gauge how comfortable they are with money or

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not. Because that's where these are, especially

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for founders. These are the two key areas where

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I see the money blocks, which is like they will

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undercut themselves. They will like, like, you

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know, they are not confident about charging a

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certain price. And they will feel like, I don't

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know if that's where the imposter syndrome also

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comes. Will people pay me for this? Right. So

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that's the big area first. And then I have founders,

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you know, it's so interesting. They make about

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half a million dollars, but they're not able

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to take a salary because their costs are so high.

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It's only come about because they're not looking

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at the accounts. They have like, OK, somebody

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else is taking care of that. As long as it's

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like a little bit profitable, I'm good. at that

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level they should be able to pay themselves and

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again then that gives me insight that there is

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a block there which is making them not look at

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their numbers on a regular basis yeah that makes

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total sense and i love the term money block yeah

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because i think you know obviously in the coaching

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work that i do there's a lot of kind of blocks

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around you know why can't you eat better you

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know why what's stopping you from getting out

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to exercise and i think that's very similar yeah

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for women and money you know it's not dissimilar

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you mentioned two things that you do help right

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so women who are just starting out, see value

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and be able to charge. Women who have already

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made half a million dollars that need to kind

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of reallocate their costs better. Do you help

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women with other aspects of money, like navigating

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salaries? So women who are not necessarily an

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entrepreneur, but corporate, like how do you

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work with women that are already? in a job? With

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the founders, it's the business coaching. I also

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work with corporate women around money. And I

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think that the first step there is sometimes

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actually telling them that, you know, you can

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negotiate your salary. You don't have to accept

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just the 5 % bump or 10 % bump. For many women,

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that itself is the block that, okay, I got my

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5 % and I'm happy with that, right? So the first

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step is actually to get them to be comfortable

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with the idea of negotiating. The second step

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is really getting them comfortable with the number

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that they want to ask for. So honestly, if someone

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is, say, comfortable with $500, if you ask them

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to suddenly be like, go and ask for $50 ,000,

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that's a big jump. They'll be very uncomfortable.

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So it's really like the work you do, it's always

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step by step, right? So it's like, okay, what

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is the number you feel comfortable asking? Then

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the third stage is really preparing them for

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it, right? Now, I feel that's the... difference

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between like men and women and of course i'm

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generalizing but it's like men would be like

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hey i helped you achieve this this much this

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year give me x amount or i'm going to quit and

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join another company right and a woman would

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like think multiple times and be like she'll

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have like these are the 10 points that you know

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how i have helped you can i get a 10 bump you

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know and like i said i'm generalizing to make

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a point but like you're generalizing the exact

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story that my girlfriend just told me Made this

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like 10 point case study to present to her boss

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about why she deserved, you know, X, Y, Z. Like

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that's exactly what she did. So not wrong. And

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it's weird because I also feel like, you know,

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women are always more self -conscious about everything.

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So if you're like looking in a mirror, a guy

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might look in the mirror and be like, oh, fuck,

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I look so good. A girl will look in the mirror

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and be like, oh, fuck, my bum is so big. Or my

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belly is so big. I feel like, you know, for women,

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you're always trying to justify, am I worth it?

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And we're more critical of ourselves. Women say

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things like, can I wear this dress? No man, honestly,

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has put on a shirt and go, can I wear this? It's

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just they're wearing it. I'm wearing it and I'm

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living. Do you find there's a particular type

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of woman or person that is not afraid, but intimidated

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by this whole asking for, for paying for something

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or, you know, putting a price on something? Is

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there like a, is there? Is there a personality

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type that feels uncomfortable when it comes to

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money? Most of the personality. personality types

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I've met of women feel uncomfortable around money

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in some areas. I can think of only a couple of

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women that I've met who are like really comfortable

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with money conversations and money talk and openly

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talking about their salaries or negotiating that.

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Most women I have met have some blocks or the

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other and they can have different personalities.

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They can be extrovert. They can be introvert.

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Really no personality type as such. But that's

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the journey, right? That's the work. that we

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need to do. And this is something I share often

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that for women, owning money is so new. Like

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my mother was. like amongst the few in her generation

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who was actually working, others were homemakers.

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And she started the journey by just earning.

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She would pass the money to my father and he

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would manage the money. So in a way, I am the

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first person in my generation, in my family,

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who's like earning the money, saving the money,

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managing the money, investing the money. And

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so if you just look back at the history, not

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just in Asia, in America, you know, when did

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women actually start getting bank accounts? When

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could they buy property? property it's so new

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to us so therefore I feel like we should be empathetic

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to ourselves that you know there is a reason

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why we have these blocks but you're absolutely

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right it's like if you don't have centuries of

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ownership you know, genetics behind you, you

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know, should I say epigenetics really? Then it's

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like, well, how likely would it be that you would

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have this amazing relationship with money? So

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first of all, tell us about money meetups, because

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I think this is the coolest idea. Talk about

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like having coffee on steroids, right? So tell

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us first, what is money meetups? So, you know,

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this really came from my own journey with money.

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So I started as someone who was earning a lot

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of money back in India, not saving a lot. So

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there was two aspects to my money journey one

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is around the money mindset and one is actually

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practically managing money so you know i would

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earn a lot but i would spend it so not really

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save and invest it and the second thing was when

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i came to singapore i came here and i had no

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job no money um you know no networks and it really

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affected my self -esteem to have to ask my husband

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for money you know so when i finally like set

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up my business that's why you know the other

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thing i'm so passionate about is helping small

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businesses grow is because my own small business

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gave me financial independence and meaning and

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purpose and doing projects that i love and creating

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back. What I'm doing now with money meetups,

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right, has really been influenced by this journey.

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The third thing I noticed was that my husband,

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my male colleagues, friends, they would go to

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bars, you know, or over a game and they would

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talk about money. Like, you know, I've invested

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in this or there's this new opportunity here.

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Or are you putting money in crypto? Yeah. And

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I was like, my husband does this over surfing.

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Yeah. Yeah. Out in the waves. Yeah. And then

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I was like, where are the spaces where the women

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are talking about money? Like when we meet up,

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usually. it's not even work we talk about kids

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in casual situations right so I was like I just

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want to create a space where it's a safe space.

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Women can come and talk openly about money. There

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are no dumb questions, you know. So what I do,

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two formats. So one is like a casual meetup.

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So I've done like a lunch where it's like very

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casual setting. And I do have conversation cards.

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So it's like, don't talk about your kids. Don't

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talk about your holidays. Talk about the prompt

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that I've given you here. Yeah, I love that.

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And then the second type I do is where I actually

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bring in a guest expert to talk about something.

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around money. So the last session I did, I had

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an expert in fixed income investment to come

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and talk about it. Because like for me, my, you

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know, investing journey, I had knowledge about

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like equities and you know, the typical, the

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traditional gold and real estate. I didn't know

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about debt investing or fixed income investing.

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And now that's what I learned that how it's become

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so easy for us as retail investors to be able

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to put like small amounts of money and it's more

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guaranteed income so like these are the things

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that I didn't know about and so I brought this

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expert to talk about it so I do both the formats

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where it's more casual and sometimes it's more

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like a workshop style as well I definitely feel

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like I need to brush up on my money game. No,

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it's incredible. And I think, you know, when

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you are in these situations, you probably realize

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that there are a lot more women in your situation,

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whatever your situation is, right? Whatever your

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situation is, then you realize. What are some

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of the common themes, like, you know, on your

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conversation cards? Like, what are you asking

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women to ask? I talk about limiting money beliefs

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and stories. So, you know, I don't know about

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you guys, but, you know, Like when I grew up,

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the common things I heard was money doesn't grow

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on trees. You have to work very hard to make

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money. If you have money, you're evil because

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no good person would make money. So that means

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if you've made money, you're not ethical. So

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I had to rewrite a lot of those stories that

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were there in my head, the narratives to be able

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to make money for myself. So the conversations

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are either around like, what are the money beliefs,

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the money stories that you have been hearing?

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then some of the questions on the cards are like

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what's your money goal for the year and that's

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a very triggering question for many women because

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they're like oh i don't have a money goal like

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i didn't set any targets for this year again

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the two prongs that i was saying one is the money

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mindset piece and one is like very strategically

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building your money pool and then saving and

00:12:59.700 --> 00:13:02.100
growing it through investments yeah so the questions

00:13:02.100 --> 00:13:04.059
are around those two yeah i love that do you

00:13:04.059 --> 00:13:07.440
find that it's almost like imposter syndrome

00:13:07.440 --> 00:13:09.279
so when someone set up their own business and

00:13:09.279 --> 00:13:11.480
they they're thinking about how much to charge

00:13:11.480 --> 00:13:14.639
it's like can i really charge this much am i

00:13:14.639 --> 00:13:16.559
worth this much do you feel like the imposter

00:13:16.559 --> 00:13:19.299
syndrome comes into it Or is it just because

00:13:19.299 --> 00:13:22.019
you're thinking your belief system is money doesn't

00:13:22.019 --> 00:13:25.019
grow on trees. Are people going to pay this much

00:13:25.019 --> 00:13:27.620
for it? It's both. The imposter syndrome definitely

00:13:27.620 --> 00:13:30.519
comes up because most of the founders I work

00:13:30.519 --> 00:13:32.460
with are first time founders. Like they don't

00:13:32.460 --> 00:13:35.320
have a history of setting up businesses. So they've

00:13:35.320 --> 00:13:38.019
either come from the corporate world or there

00:13:38.019 --> 00:13:41.059
are women who, exceptional women who had great

00:13:41.059 --> 00:13:44.500
careers in other places and now are not finding

00:13:44.500 --> 00:13:46.799
those opportunities here. So looking to start

00:13:46.799 --> 00:13:49.629
a business. So there is a lot of imposter syndrome

00:13:49.629 --> 00:13:52.570
around like, am I a founder? Because the moment

00:13:52.570 --> 00:13:55.110
people think of like entrepreneurs, they think

00:13:55.110 --> 00:13:57.409
of like the Zuckerbergs of the world and the

00:13:57.409 --> 00:13:59.570
masks and all of that. And then they're like,

00:13:59.649 --> 00:14:02.750
I'm not them, you know? So there is a lot of

00:14:02.750 --> 00:14:05.929
imposter syndrome for sure. But that was the

00:14:05.929 --> 00:14:08.230
interesting realization for me when I started

00:14:08.230 --> 00:14:10.289
doing my business coaching, because I thought

00:14:10.289 --> 00:14:12.590
I'll be just talking around like business strategy

00:14:12.590 --> 00:14:15.710
and how do you create your product and service

00:14:15.710 --> 00:14:19.090
marketing and sales. But the biggest piece I

00:14:19.090 --> 00:14:22.590
work with founders on is the mindset. So we cover

00:14:22.590 --> 00:14:25.350
things like imposter syndrome for sure, but even

00:14:25.350 --> 00:14:28.230
things like perfectionism, which means that they

00:14:28.230 --> 00:14:30.490
are just waiting for everything to be right before

00:14:30.490 --> 00:14:33.090
putting it out there. Or procrastination, which

00:14:33.090 --> 00:14:35.549
is kind of linked to this. So they're all kind

00:14:35.549 --> 00:14:38.269
of limiting beliefs that we need to work on.

00:14:38.409 --> 00:14:41.330
And I think you guys would know like being founders

00:14:41.330 --> 00:14:44.450
is like the biggest personal growth journey you

00:14:44.450 --> 00:14:47.340
can go on. Oh, yeah. No question. And when you

00:14:47.340 --> 00:14:49.720
were talking, I think there's so many parallels

00:14:49.720 --> 00:14:52.519
in any sort of coaching, right? And, you know,

00:14:52.519 --> 00:14:54.120
it's like, so you're a coach, I'm a coach, right?

00:14:54.159 --> 00:14:56.320
Very different worlds. But we're both sharing

00:14:56.320 --> 00:14:58.360
an experience right now of writing a book. Yes.

00:14:58.519 --> 00:15:01.110
Are you being coached? I'm not being coached.

00:15:01.190 --> 00:15:03.730
So I am. I started a coaching journey for that.

00:15:03.909 --> 00:15:06.549
And it's so interesting what you're saying. That's

00:15:06.549 --> 00:15:09.049
my version of imposter syndrome, where I was

00:15:09.049 --> 00:15:11.649
like, no coach is going to take me. I'm too new.

00:15:11.730 --> 00:15:13.309
I don't know anything about the publishing industry.

00:15:13.409 --> 00:15:15.009
I'm going to be an embarrassment to this lady.

00:15:15.389 --> 00:15:17.909
And now at this stage in my writing journey,

00:15:18.389 --> 00:15:20.870
a lot of the feedback I get, she's like, you've

00:15:20.870 --> 00:15:23.289
really thought this out. You have a ton of experience

00:15:23.289 --> 00:15:24.970
in this area. You've worked with hundreds of

00:15:24.970 --> 00:15:27.799
women. And I was like. You're damn right. You're

00:15:27.799 --> 00:15:30.200
absolutely right. So I think part of what's important

00:15:30.200 --> 00:15:32.320
and what you do is making women, they're not

00:15:32.320 --> 00:15:35.000
illiterate about money. They operate in the money

00:15:35.000 --> 00:15:38.600
world like we all do. And just getting over some

00:15:38.600 --> 00:15:42.000
of their own blocks. And there are stats to prove

00:15:42.000 --> 00:15:45.059
that women are much smarter at managing money

00:15:45.059 --> 00:15:47.659
once they actually do it. Like they're savvier

00:15:47.659 --> 00:15:50.779
at it. It's just that we don't hear about those

00:15:50.779 --> 00:15:53.659
stories. So these narratives need to be out.

00:15:53.759 --> 00:15:55.490
And again, you just mentioned. you know, like

00:15:55.490 --> 00:15:58.309
all the Zuckerbergs and the Musks. Male, male,

00:15:58.389 --> 00:16:00.409
male. Right. Like, you know, like I want to hear

00:16:00.409 --> 00:16:03.190
about the female or should I say I want to have

00:16:03.190 --> 00:16:06.309
a touch point for that female. And again, it

00:16:06.309 --> 00:16:07.909
doesn't have to be. And that's the other thing,

00:16:07.970 --> 00:16:10.210
too, is like only looking at those super, super,

00:16:10.210 --> 00:16:12.710
super, super, super high achievers then kind

00:16:12.710 --> 00:16:15.789
of negates the experience of anything below it.

00:16:15.809 --> 00:16:17.250
Absolutely. And I think that actually leads to

00:16:17.250 --> 00:16:20.750
my next question, which is right. So women obviously

00:16:20.750 --> 00:16:23.549
in their 40s can't help but measure their careers

00:16:23.549 --> 00:16:25.929
by their financial worth. Right. What they have

00:16:25.929 --> 00:16:28.220
earned, what they have. the revenue that they've

00:16:28.220 --> 00:16:30.220
earned as well as their earning potential, right?

00:16:30.580 --> 00:16:33.659
But I love that you use the term impact, right?

00:16:33.759 --> 00:16:35.720
So, okay, here's the money you've earned, but

00:16:35.720 --> 00:16:38.600
here's the impact that you've made. Can you tell

00:16:38.600 --> 00:16:41.279
us a little bit about how you help women leave

00:16:41.279 --> 00:16:45.000
legacies of impact? Everything that I do is so

00:16:45.000 --> 00:16:48.419
built on what I have experienced and I went through.

00:16:48.600 --> 00:16:51.519
So at the age of 40, so I'm going to turn 43

00:16:51.519 --> 00:16:54.279
next month, I went through a bit of a dark night

00:16:54.279 --> 00:16:56.580
of the soul where I was like, I'm really not

00:16:56.580 --> 00:16:59.460
sure what I want the next 40 years of my life

00:16:59.460 --> 00:17:03.399
to look like. And so I kind of took a backseat

00:17:03.399 --> 00:17:07.740
from my projects. I also... went down like i've

00:17:07.740 --> 00:17:11.180
started on a deep spiritual journey that i'm

00:17:11.180 --> 00:17:14.539
still continuing on but i have come out of that

00:17:14.539 --> 00:17:18.019
dark night with very clear understanding of my

00:17:18.019 --> 00:17:20.480
mission and that mission like for me you know

00:17:20.480 --> 00:17:23.119
sometimes there's a lot of noise so i just keep

00:17:23.119 --> 00:17:26.839
it very simple it's two letters ai but not artificial

00:17:26.839 --> 00:17:33.299
intelligence yeah it's ai as an abundance and

00:17:33.299 --> 00:17:36.609
impact so for me i want to create abundance for

00:17:36.609 --> 00:17:39.450
myself but also help others create abundance

00:17:39.450 --> 00:17:42.970
and then i want to be able to impact other people

00:17:42.970 --> 00:17:46.750
and help other people create impact so that that

00:17:46.750 --> 00:17:50.230
was like how i narrowed down as what i see my

00:17:50.230 --> 00:17:53.329
mission for the next 40 years and then everything

00:17:53.329 --> 00:17:55.869
else whether it's the work i do at launchpad

00:17:55.869 --> 00:17:58.819
the work i do at Coaching work, the money meetups

00:17:58.819 --> 00:18:02.339
and all kinds of leads to this AI mission that

00:18:02.339 --> 00:18:05.299
I have. Right. When I work with women at this

00:18:05.299 --> 00:18:08.339
stage, as you were saying, right, it's the conversation

00:18:08.339 --> 00:18:12.839
is often about it's just by getting them to think

00:18:12.839 --> 00:18:15.440
about what is the legacy you want to leave behind.

00:18:15.500 --> 00:18:17.500
You know, forget the numbers, get out of the

00:18:17.500 --> 00:18:20.920
operations. Let's just take a quiet moment. And

00:18:20.920 --> 00:18:22.960
that's where journaling really helps, you know.

00:18:23.779 --> 00:18:27.200
Let's just be self -aware on, you know, 40 years

00:18:27.200 --> 00:18:30.480
down the line. Once we pass away, what do you

00:18:30.480 --> 00:18:32.740
want to have left behind in the world? Right.

00:18:32.819 --> 00:18:36.500
And just that question sets people thinking.

00:18:36.599 --> 00:18:38.900
And, you know, they're like, oh, I want to like,

00:18:39.079 --> 00:18:42.059
you know, leave a company or leave a book or

00:18:42.059 --> 00:18:45.440
I want to like actually work in like, you know.

00:18:47.019 --> 00:18:50.019
poverty alleviation I want to like help the environment

00:18:50.019 --> 00:18:52.640
like and then it's like okay we've come up with

00:18:52.640 --> 00:18:55.259
these things that you want to do now but right

00:18:55.259 --> 00:18:58.539
now you're at this stage now how do we go from

00:18:58.539 --> 00:19:01.910
here to where you want to be Amanda, you know

00:19:01.910 --> 00:19:03.589
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to jump in the kitchen and get cooking, and we

00:19:45.130 --> 00:19:47.420
cannot wait to see what you make. That sounds

00:19:47.420 --> 00:19:50.140
like a very intense and kind of intimidating

00:19:50.140 --> 00:19:52.140
journey, but I assume that's exactly what you

00:19:52.140 --> 00:19:54.500
help with. Yes, exactly. It's getting ready to

00:19:54.500 --> 00:19:57.299
be. And I guess that then provides clarity as

00:19:57.299 --> 00:19:59.259
well, plodding along in the world, doing your

00:19:59.259 --> 00:20:01.420
shit. And then it's like, what is it that you

00:20:01.420 --> 00:20:03.700
want? And I think if you really sort of think

00:20:03.700 --> 00:20:06.359
back to it, it will give you the route and the

00:20:06.359 --> 00:20:09.000
path. how you're going to get there because like

00:20:09.000 --> 00:20:11.099
we do as coaches as well you know if you don't

00:20:11.099 --> 00:20:13.000
know where you're going how do you know what

00:20:13.000 --> 00:20:15.059
you need to do in order to get there yeah and

00:20:15.059 --> 00:20:17.160
i'm probably way oversimplifying this but i'm

00:20:17.160 --> 00:20:18.740
sure you've seen each of these women i'm about

00:20:18.740 --> 00:20:21.119
to describe so we have i'm going to paint for

00:20:21.119 --> 00:20:23.539
you three women in midlife okay so we've got

00:20:23.539 --> 00:20:26.380
woman one Let's call her Jasmine. Do I want to

00:20:26.380 --> 00:20:29.880
be a woman? Let's call her Jasmine. But we got,

00:20:29.900 --> 00:20:31.680
yeah, we got woman number one who's been working

00:20:31.680 --> 00:20:34.279
in corporate careers since her 20s, right? And

00:20:34.279 --> 00:20:37.319
has recently started a family and is out, wants

00:20:37.319 --> 00:20:39.160
to be out of the game, wants to be out of the

00:20:39.160 --> 00:20:40.940
game, wants a different pace of life, doesn't

00:20:40.940 --> 00:20:42.640
want to travel so much, needs to be out of the

00:20:42.640 --> 00:20:45.400
rat race, but literally doesn't know a different

00:20:45.400 --> 00:20:47.440
life. She doesn't know a different way. That's

00:20:47.440 --> 00:20:49.880
been her identity, you know, since she was working

00:20:49.880 --> 00:20:53.200
in New York City in, you know, 2014. So she doesn't

00:20:53.200 --> 00:20:56.019
have, a map for what's next so there's there's

00:20:56.019 --> 00:20:59.279
one midlife yeah second midlife woman took off

00:20:59.279 --> 00:21:01.539
time to have kids so she has not been in the

00:21:01.539 --> 00:21:03.039
corporate world in fact she's been out of the

00:21:03.039 --> 00:21:05.960
working world entirely let's say in her 30s right

00:21:05.960 --> 00:21:08.220
so maybe she started work in her 20s took off

00:21:08.220 --> 00:21:11.140
her 30s to start a family wants to get back at

00:21:11.140 --> 00:21:13.779
it in her 40s has no idea what that looks like

00:21:13.779 --> 00:21:17.019
and then woman number three who's basically a

00:21:17.019 --> 00:21:19.500
hybrid of the two right so it's like she family

00:21:20.140 --> 00:21:22.339
irrelevant here or there, but wants to achieve

00:21:22.339 --> 00:21:25.019
a work -life balance. So whether it's corporate,

00:21:25.119 --> 00:21:27.640
whether it's entrepreneurship, she wants a life

00:21:27.640 --> 00:21:31.319
that is her own design. How do you help each

00:21:31.319 --> 00:21:34.140
of these women? So for each of them, right, what

00:21:34.140 --> 00:21:37.559
I would have them do is an audit exercise to

00:21:37.559 --> 00:21:40.059
begin with, right? So what that audit exercise

00:21:40.059 --> 00:21:43.180
looks like is for a week, just write down the

00:21:43.180 --> 00:21:45.400
activities that you're doing every day. Like

00:21:45.400 --> 00:21:47.359
I actually have a template for this. So it's

00:21:47.359 --> 00:21:50.789
like, okay, 7 .30am, 8 .30am. 9 .30 a .m. Write

00:21:50.789 --> 00:21:52.750
down everything that you're doing. That you're

00:21:52.750 --> 00:21:54.490
currently doing. You're currently doing. Yeah,

00:21:54.569 --> 00:21:57.269
it's an audit. Currently doing for a week. But

00:21:57.269 --> 00:22:01.170
next to it, have indicators of whether is this

00:22:01.170 --> 00:22:05.980
giving me money? Is this giving me energy? Anything

00:22:05.980 --> 00:22:07.900
else I'm getting from it, like maybe I'm just

00:22:07.900 --> 00:22:10.200
helping out in the school and it gives me a lot

00:22:10.200 --> 00:22:12.359
of joy or I'm just doing this for impact. I'm

00:22:12.359 --> 00:22:16.619
hugging my child from 9 .30, 9 .31. It's like

00:22:16.619 --> 00:22:19.420
it's giving me joy. So what I have them do is

00:22:19.420 --> 00:22:21.539
kind of, I call it like an energy audit, but

00:22:21.539 --> 00:22:24.819
it's really like measuring, you know, your day

00:22:24.819 --> 00:22:28.019
to day in terms of like money is so important,

00:22:28.119 --> 00:22:31.460
right? So money for sure, but also like energy

00:22:31.460 --> 00:22:33.440
that you're getting, anything else you're receiving

00:22:33.440 --> 00:22:36.369
from it or you're giving. So that's one exercise.

00:22:36.450 --> 00:22:39.529
And then the second exercise I have them do is

00:22:39.529 --> 00:22:43.390
what does my perfect day look like? Right. So

00:22:43.390 --> 00:22:46.609
again, it's once they do these two exercises,

00:22:46.809 --> 00:22:49.769
right, it's like I have the current life audit.

00:22:49.869 --> 00:22:53.650
I have my perfect day. Now, how do I reach that?

00:22:53.789 --> 00:22:56.549
And for each of these three women, right, the

00:22:56.549 --> 00:22:59.650
journeys will look very different. But it's like.

00:23:00.190 --> 00:23:03.069
The first step is really knowing where I am and

00:23:03.069 --> 00:23:05.869
where I want to be. And that clarity is so important

00:23:05.869 --> 00:23:08.369
for both the things. And I think one thing I

00:23:08.369 --> 00:23:10.210
wanted to highlight here, because this is something

00:23:10.210 --> 00:23:13.430
that comes up a lot, is that when women start

00:23:13.430 --> 00:23:15.869
thinking of impact, right? I think we're all

00:23:15.869 --> 00:23:19.109
in our 40s, right? You're very sweet to say I

00:23:19.109 --> 00:23:22.289
think. Yeah, we all are. So we all have this

00:23:22.289 --> 00:23:26.230
idea. We grew up with like that one job has to

00:23:26.230 --> 00:23:28.910
give us everything. Like that one job has to

00:23:28.910 --> 00:23:30.920
make us money. It has to give us like we should

00:23:30.920 --> 00:23:33.779
be able to create impact. We should feel fulfilled

00:23:33.779 --> 00:23:37.440
by it. And that's the notion that I help women

00:23:37.440 --> 00:23:40.579
break, that it's totally fine to do one job that

00:23:40.579 --> 00:23:42.940
gives you money and then something else you're

00:23:42.940 --> 00:23:46.160
doing, which is just for impact. And a third

00:23:46.160 --> 00:23:48.200
thing that you're doing, which is like, you know,

00:23:48.200 --> 00:23:51.619
giving you joy. It doesn't have to be like. it's

00:23:51.619 --> 00:23:54.559
like putting you know pressure on like one relationship

00:23:54.559 --> 00:23:57.599
to fulfill you right like my husband or my partner

00:23:57.599 --> 00:24:00.480
has to be everything for me yeah so that's the

00:24:00.480 --> 00:24:02.960
kind of pressure we need to take away from the

00:24:02.960 --> 00:24:05.539
work that we're doing as well because you know

00:24:05.539 --> 00:24:07.380
the woman that you were talking about in the

00:24:07.380 --> 00:24:10.420
first case right like she could have a corporate

00:24:10.420 --> 00:24:12.819
job and a little bit of a side hustle in fact

00:24:12.819 --> 00:24:15.319
i know so many women in singapore who make these

00:24:15.319 --> 00:24:18.359
cute like woolen things i've forgotten the name

00:24:18.359 --> 00:24:20.440
of it i know what you mean it's a little it's

00:24:20.440 --> 00:24:22.460
not the potato thing is it it's it's not the

00:24:22.460 --> 00:24:24.940
potato i've forgotten what it's called it's not

00:24:24.940 --> 00:24:27.880
it's not knitting it's yeah it's a new thing

00:24:27.880 --> 00:24:31.480
crochet yes exactly yeah so they have a side

00:24:31.480 --> 00:24:34.400
hustle of like these little crochet toys there's

00:24:34.400 --> 00:24:36.500
no pressure on making money i have a little broccoli

00:24:36.500 --> 00:24:39.160
yeah like there's no pressure of making money

00:24:39.160 --> 00:24:40.940
from it like you know of course they may sell

00:24:40.970 --> 00:24:43.049
it they may gift it they may take part in pop

00:24:43.049 --> 00:24:45.349
-ups but money is coming from the corporate job

00:24:45.349 --> 00:24:47.890
this they're doing for fun yeah so that's what

00:24:47.890 --> 00:24:49.930
i mean and then they'll also do some form of

00:24:49.930 --> 00:24:53.049
social service you know they'll go and like prepare

00:24:53.049 --> 00:24:56.109
like boxes of lunch boxes for migrant workers

00:24:56.109 --> 00:24:58.730
or something like that so it's like you can create

00:24:58.730 --> 00:25:03.029
a life in which you can You know, hit all the

00:25:03.029 --> 00:25:06.349
targets and goals that you want, but not expect

00:25:06.349 --> 00:25:09.910
it to come from one role, which is where I feel

00:25:09.910 --> 00:25:12.490
like that's where we get like that's the mistake

00:25:12.490 --> 00:25:14.750
we make. Yeah. Well, and when you said like you

00:25:14.750 --> 00:25:16.170
can have fulfillment and don't expect it to come

00:25:16.170 --> 00:25:18.950
from one role, I think that that really speaks

00:25:18.950 --> 00:25:21.809
to motherhood. Yeah. Where it's like you. It's

00:25:21.809 --> 00:25:24.970
okay to say that, like, my sun, moon, stars,

00:25:25.089 --> 00:25:26.890
reason for breathing, reason I wake up, go to

00:25:26.890 --> 00:25:28.730
bed, do anything is my kids. Yeah, yeah. And

00:25:28.730 --> 00:25:30.769
while I will say that, actually, and it's literally

00:25:30.769 --> 00:25:32.930
tattooed on my body, but, like, my point is,

00:25:32.950 --> 00:25:36.710
like, it's okay to be a mother and also have

00:25:36.710 --> 00:25:39.210
an actual real life with real interests. Yeah,

00:25:39.250 --> 00:25:41.289
absolutely. You know, so this woman number two

00:25:41.289 --> 00:25:43.829
in this case, right? It's okay to say, I'm ready.

00:25:44.410 --> 00:25:46.829
to do something else in addition to being a mom

00:25:46.829 --> 00:25:49.190
if that's what you want i love my boys i have

00:25:49.190 --> 00:25:53.970
two boys they're 11 and 7 but Like after my first

00:25:53.970 --> 00:25:58.309
son, I wasn't working. I had such a hard time

00:25:58.309 --> 00:26:01.710
just taking care of him, not physically, but

00:26:01.710 --> 00:26:04.789
mentally, because I felt like all I'm doing with

00:26:04.789 --> 00:26:06.869
my life is feeding him, changing him, putting

00:26:06.869 --> 00:26:09.109
him to sleep. And that's all my life is. Once

00:26:09.109 --> 00:26:10.930
I had my second one, that time I was working.

00:26:11.089 --> 00:26:13.089
I was like, this time I'll take a four month

00:26:13.089 --> 00:26:16.009
maternity break. I'll really enjoy the time with

00:26:16.009 --> 00:26:18.789
my son. I was back to my projects in two months

00:26:18.789 --> 00:26:22.019
because again, I felt like. What am I doing with

00:26:22.019 --> 00:26:23.960
my day? What am I doing with my life? Like I

00:26:23.960 --> 00:26:27.019
love him, but I need something else, you know?

00:26:27.019 --> 00:26:29.640
That comes back to your identity, you know? And

00:26:29.640 --> 00:26:32.259
again, what brings you joy? So I was having a

00:26:32.259 --> 00:26:35.380
conversation with a client yesterday and for

00:26:35.380 --> 00:26:38.059
her, she said to me that during COVID, it was

00:26:38.059 --> 00:26:41.059
bliss because it meant she got to come home from

00:26:41.059 --> 00:26:43.619
the office, relax, you know, take it easy from

00:26:43.619 --> 00:26:46.539
work and it wasn't so stressful. And then I was

00:26:46.539 --> 00:26:49.900
like, that's great. And my husband felt exactly

00:26:49.900 --> 00:26:52.279
the same way. I said, for me, my COVID journey

00:26:52.279 --> 00:26:54.759
was completely different because I was at home

00:26:54.759 --> 00:26:58.539
with the three kids. And it was intense and,

00:26:58.599 --> 00:27:00.859
you know, it was not relaxing. And, you know,

00:27:00.880 --> 00:27:04.519
just you kind of feel like, I guess if you were

00:27:04.519 --> 00:27:06.960
to flip it, it's like having your lockdown in

00:27:06.960 --> 00:27:09.720
the office. That's what it feels like, doesn't

00:27:09.720 --> 00:27:12.779
it? No, you're so right. You're so right. You

00:27:12.779 --> 00:27:14.740
know, women, I think at a certain point, need

00:27:14.740 --> 00:27:17.200
to be told, like, it's okay to have multiple

00:27:17.200 --> 00:27:20.299
identities. Oh, yeah. You don't have to stick

00:27:20.299 --> 00:27:22.259
to one. One of the things that really helps me

00:27:22.259 --> 00:27:24.180
as like a multi -hyphenate, right? You know,

00:27:24.200 --> 00:27:26.400
someone who's writing and doing whatever. It's

00:27:26.400 --> 00:27:29.130
like, be where your feet are. Yes. Be present.

00:27:29.289 --> 00:27:31.269
Yeah. So it's like, you know, we're in the podcast

00:27:31.269 --> 00:27:33.769
studio. We are all here. You know, it's it's

00:27:33.769 --> 00:27:36.509
Galentine's Day for those, you know, later, but

00:27:36.509 --> 00:27:38.029
it's Valentine's Day. And it's like, yeah, so

00:27:38.029 --> 00:27:40.349
we're all here doing this with each other. And

00:27:40.349 --> 00:27:42.210
then when we step out of here, we might be on

00:27:42.210 --> 00:27:43.670
dates with our husbands or we might be in our

00:27:43.670 --> 00:27:45.849
kids school and we might be. And then that we

00:27:45.849 --> 00:27:47.910
can be that. Yeah. You can be all that. Yeah.

00:27:48.049 --> 00:27:49.589
You know, you don't have to pay. And, you know,

00:27:49.589 --> 00:27:51.509
I just want to highlight this, that, you know,

00:27:51.509 --> 00:27:54.430
it's not just money that women don't talk about

00:27:54.430 --> 00:27:56.930
openly. It's what we were talking about now.

00:27:57.319 --> 00:28:00.900
right now that we need space that is our own

00:28:00.900 --> 00:28:04.299
and it's away from our kids. Like we feel a lot

00:28:04.299 --> 00:28:07.279
of shame just saying that as well. What you don't

00:28:07.279 --> 00:28:08.400
want to be. You just said it and it made me nervous.

00:28:08.460 --> 00:28:09.660
I was like, oh, what if someone thinks we don't

00:28:09.660 --> 00:28:12.900
love our kids? Yeah, we do. We love you. It's

00:28:12.900 --> 00:28:14.799
like what you're saying, you don't want to be

00:28:14.799 --> 00:28:17.000
with your kids all the time. Yes, I don't want

00:28:17.000 --> 00:28:18.819
to be with them all the time. Did I stutter?

00:28:20.180 --> 00:28:23.220
That's what I said. No, you're absolutely right

00:28:23.220 --> 00:28:25.180
though. Okay, so we've hit on some of the kind

00:28:25.180 --> 00:28:27.319
of like really buzzwordy things. in business

00:28:27.319 --> 00:28:30.700
right imposter syndrome yeah burnout right limiting

00:28:30.700 --> 00:28:33.799
beliefs fear of failure if you could only pick

00:28:33.799 --> 00:28:37.559
one of those okay what is the biggest one that

00:28:37.559 --> 00:28:40.160
you think affects the greatest number of women

00:28:40.160 --> 00:28:43.839
and how do you how do you help them get past

00:28:43.839 --> 00:28:46.109
it So I'm going to cheat here a bit and call

00:28:46.109 --> 00:28:49.650
it limiting beliefs because I feel like all the

00:28:49.650 --> 00:28:53.490
others kind of come into this bucket. But you

00:28:53.490 --> 00:28:56.630
know this, Amanda, like you will tell people

00:28:56.630 --> 00:28:59.390
that you need to train every day, even if it's

00:28:59.390 --> 00:29:03.269
like seven minutes. Like even if it's like seven

00:29:03.269 --> 00:29:05.769
minutes, put in something every day for your

00:29:05.769 --> 00:29:08.049
body. And the same applies for nutrition as well,

00:29:08.069 --> 00:29:11.150
right? Like it has to be a daily thing. What

00:29:11.150 --> 00:29:14.019
I have realized that I never did. and now I've

00:29:14.019 --> 00:29:16.019
started doing it and I encourage founders to

00:29:16.019 --> 00:29:18.400
do, is that we need to do daily mind training.

00:29:18.640 --> 00:29:22.680
Like we are not setting aside time to like empower

00:29:22.680 --> 00:29:25.740
our minds to be the best selves. And it can be

00:29:25.740 --> 00:29:29.079
affirmations. It can be visualization. It can

00:29:29.079 --> 00:29:32.660
be listening to like positive hypnosis videos

00:29:32.660 --> 00:29:36.039
and audios, which are like, you know, like what

00:29:36.039 --> 00:29:39.059
I've started doing now is I sleep with a self

00:29:39.059 --> 00:29:41.359
-hypnosis video. I've heard about this. I used

00:29:41.359 --> 00:29:43.420
to do that. You did it too. I used to do it.

00:29:43.420 --> 00:29:45.819
So I started doing that during pregnancy and

00:29:45.819 --> 00:29:48.079
it was hypnobirthing at the time. But the problem

00:29:48.079 --> 00:29:50.099
was every time I turned on, I fell asleep. And

00:29:50.099 --> 00:29:52.619
I was like, wow, this is amazing. Then my husband

00:29:52.619 --> 00:29:55.599
started joining in and he was like, my God, why

00:29:55.599 --> 00:29:57.680
did we never do this before? Was he listening

00:29:57.680 --> 00:29:59.660
to the hypnobirthing? Hypnobirthing. But again,

00:29:59.799 --> 00:30:02.160
we'd get 10 minutes into it and we'd both be

00:30:02.160 --> 00:30:05.759
conked out. And it is incredible. Like, it's

00:30:05.759 --> 00:30:07.940
so relaxing. I started doing it with the kids.

00:30:08.569 --> 00:30:11.450
So I'll say, okay, we're going to do some, what

00:30:11.450 --> 00:30:14.970
do we call it? I call it, I say meditation or

00:30:14.970 --> 00:30:18.529
something. And I mean. It doesn't help them fall

00:30:18.529 --> 00:30:20.369
asleep, but what it does is it calms them a little

00:30:20.369 --> 00:30:21.970
bit. They feel better. They're not so excited.

00:30:22.369 --> 00:30:24.730
Is that why you do it? For calming? No, I do

00:30:24.730 --> 00:30:27.289
it because what I read the science around it

00:30:27.289 --> 00:30:31.230
is that your subconscious is always awake. So

00:30:31.230 --> 00:30:33.609
these words, even though, so I put it at very

00:30:33.609 --> 00:30:36.769
low volume near me. And these words, even while

00:30:36.769 --> 00:30:40.240
you're sleeping, it's actually kind of. imprinting

00:30:40.240 --> 00:30:43.359
on your brain and rewriting the thoughts and

00:30:43.359 --> 00:30:46.680
the beliefs you have. And I'm also a light sleeper.

00:30:46.680 --> 00:30:49.319
So what happens is when I say wake up two, three

00:30:49.319 --> 00:30:52.519
times, I wake up with someone saying, oh, you

00:30:52.519 --> 00:30:55.759
have an abundant mindset. You're drawing abundance

00:30:55.759 --> 00:30:58.319
into your life. Like, it's like, you know, waking

00:30:58.319 --> 00:31:01.819
up and hearing that, it is like, it's hard to

00:31:01.819 --> 00:31:05.299
kind of, you know, say it in words, the impact,

00:31:05.480 --> 00:31:09.440
but I can feel it. in terms of like how I'm behaving

00:31:09.440 --> 00:31:12.720
once I wake up, you know? And how, like I wake

00:31:12.720 --> 00:31:15.619
up feeling so positive and empowered and like

00:31:15.619 --> 00:31:19.759
I have agency, I can create my day. And that's

00:31:19.759 --> 00:31:22.000
the one thing that I changed. Get out. How long

00:31:22.000 --> 00:31:23.059
have you been doing it, if you don't mind me

00:31:23.059 --> 00:31:25.119
asking? Four or five months now. And nightly?

00:31:25.259 --> 00:31:28.359
Nightly. So literally head hits pillow. yes thing

00:31:28.359 --> 00:31:31.220
goes on yeah yeah so what i do is i i like reduce

00:31:31.220 --> 00:31:33.460
the light to the minimum so the light doesn't

00:31:33.460 --> 00:31:35.420
disturb me i have it played and playing on my

00:31:35.420 --> 00:31:38.180
ipad yeah and it's like a you can find these

00:31:38.180 --> 00:31:40.839
are free videos on youtube of course you have

00:31:40.839 --> 00:31:43.259
to search to find what resonates the best with

00:31:43.259 --> 00:31:46.200
you but marissa pierre is a great one you have

00:31:46.200 --> 00:31:49.119
you do you know marissa i don't actually She's

00:31:49.119 --> 00:31:51.920
an RTT specialist, rapid transformational therapy.

00:31:52.099 --> 00:31:55.619
And so she's someone who does these, shares these

00:31:55.619 --> 00:31:59.339
free self -hypnosis videos, audios on her YouTube

00:31:59.339 --> 00:32:02.640
channel. I'll just put that on like very low

00:32:02.640 --> 00:32:05.700
volume and no light. And it keeps playing in

00:32:05.700 --> 00:32:08.039
the background. Megha bought us some gifts today,

00:32:08.180 --> 00:32:10.299
which were some journals, which I am very excited

00:32:10.299 --> 00:32:12.259
about. Thank you. And surprisingly, I had actually

00:32:12.259 --> 00:32:15.069
asked. about journals and the reason i had done

00:32:15.069 --> 00:32:17.750
that was because i wanted to just do a brain

00:32:17.750 --> 00:32:19.470
dump before i went to bed i didn't want to be

00:32:19.470 --> 00:32:23.089
on my phone i wanted to write down what I needed

00:32:23.089 --> 00:32:25.569
to do and what I had already achieved that day

00:32:25.569 --> 00:32:27.549
so that I'm not thinking about it at night time,

00:32:27.609 --> 00:32:29.529
just to kind of, you know, just get it out of

00:32:29.529 --> 00:32:33.170
my head. And I feel like when you are struggling

00:32:33.170 --> 00:32:35.589
with so many thoughts, you know, as a mum, as

00:32:35.589 --> 00:32:38.710
an entrepreneur, you know, as a wife, whatever

00:32:38.710 --> 00:32:41.630
it is, just getting that stuff out will kind

00:32:41.630 --> 00:32:45.450
of help you get into this. Deep rest. I do feel

00:32:45.450 --> 00:32:48.890
like I brain dump on my husband. Like, I like,

00:32:48.930 --> 00:32:50.329
I have, I'm that person who has to like talk

00:32:50.329 --> 00:32:51.789
for 10 straight minutes and then we can pass

00:32:51.789 --> 00:32:54.589
out. I wanted to do that, but Amin basically

00:32:54.589 --> 00:32:56.650
said, can you stop projecting your stress on

00:32:56.650 --> 00:32:59.369
me? Okay, fine. I need to just write it down.

00:32:59.930 --> 00:33:04.549
I'll put it in my journal. That's a great point

00:33:04.549 --> 00:33:09.069
because I found it so much easier to like. compartmentalize

00:33:09.069 --> 00:33:11.869
after doing these self -hypnosis videos because

00:33:11.869 --> 00:33:14.210
now I can be like I'll deal with it tomorrow

00:33:14.210 --> 00:33:17.410
and like shut down and it's like rewind time

00:33:17.410 --> 00:33:19.529
and it of course helps that I have something

00:33:19.529 --> 00:33:22.009
playing which is telling me other things and

00:33:22.009 --> 00:33:24.430
then in the morning when I wake up right like

00:33:24.430 --> 00:33:28.289
I'm actively able to choose thoughts which I

00:33:28.289 --> 00:33:30.150
couldn't do earlier like I would always start

00:33:30.150 --> 00:33:32.549
my day by oh I have to do this I have to do that

00:33:32.549 --> 00:33:34.869
this is urgent that's urgent like already like

00:33:34.869 --> 00:33:36.970
I'm waking up at 5 .30 and I have like a stress

00:33:37.130 --> 00:33:38.930
That is me. That's literally me. You're describing

00:33:38.930 --> 00:33:41.650
me. But now I'm like, I can just be like, that's

00:33:41.650 --> 00:33:44.109
later. That's for later. And then choose something

00:33:44.109 --> 00:33:46.309
else, you know? And I'll have these affirmations

00:33:46.309 --> 00:33:48.950
I say to myself. I do my prayers in the morning

00:33:48.950 --> 00:33:51.930
as well. And I think that mind training has made

00:33:51.930 --> 00:33:55.970
such a difference. So maybe that's the next soapbox

00:33:55.970 --> 00:33:58.109
I'll get on after money. Oh, get on it. Mind

00:33:58.109 --> 00:34:00.269
training. I feel like that is literally the soapbox

00:34:00.269 --> 00:34:02.829
to get on. It's the atomic habits of, you know,

00:34:02.829 --> 00:34:04.690
mindset shifting, right? It's like, do this one

00:34:04.690 --> 00:34:06.470
thing every day. Again, we talked a lot. little

00:34:06.470 --> 00:34:08.630
bit about you know women having career changes

00:34:08.630 --> 00:34:10.349
in their midlife right so whether it's you know

00:34:10.349 --> 00:34:12.909
going back to work or starting work or giving

00:34:12.909 --> 00:34:15.090
up the corporate life whatever it may be how

00:34:15.360 --> 00:34:17.920
important are networks in this case right so

00:34:17.920 --> 00:34:20.280
like is this something that you can go at it

00:34:20.280 --> 00:34:23.320
alone is it better to know people like how do

00:34:23.320 --> 00:34:26.260
women leverage networks to make transitions at

00:34:26.260 --> 00:34:29.920
this age networks are really crucial and i feel

00:34:29.920 --> 00:34:31.719
like this is something that should be taught

00:34:31.719 --> 00:34:35.079
in schools that you know the the people you surround

00:34:35.079 --> 00:34:39.280
yourself with are the ones that will help you

00:34:39.280 --> 00:34:42.780
to achieve your life goals and i don't mean it

00:34:42.780 --> 00:34:45.090
in a very strategic or a practical way, like

00:34:45.090 --> 00:34:47.210
somebody will give you a job or an opportunity.

00:34:47.610 --> 00:34:51.090
It's again, the mindset. So if I'm aiming for

00:34:51.090 --> 00:34:54.309
a $1 million business, right, I want to surround

00:34:54.309 --> 00:34:57.429
myself with founders who also have the same goal

00:34:57.429 --> 00:35:00.309
or have achieved it, because then I will feel

00:35:00.309 --> 00:35:02.349
that, oh, it's doable. It's not a big thing.

00:35:02.429 --> 00:35:04.369
I can do it. If they can do it, I can do it,

00:35:04.389 --> 00:35:07.050
you know. And so for women, I feel it's especially

00:35:07.050 --> 00:35:09.530
more important, like whether you're in that transition

00:35:09.530 --> 00:35:14.550
phase, right, to find networks where women are

00:35:14.550 --> 00:35:17.869
in the same journey as they are. So what I feel

00:35:17.869 --> 00:35:20.829
now is that instead of trying to, like I do,

00:35:20.989 --> 00:35:23.150
like, you know, I run Launchpad, which is a community.

00:35:23.150 --> 00:35:26.570
You run a network. Yes, helpful. Yeah, I run

00:35:26.570 --> 00:35:30.329
a network. And so what I tell founders is that

00:35:30.329 --> 00:35:34.190
find networks where you find an alignment in

00:35:34.190 --> 00:35:37.809
terms of values and in terms of people who are

00:35:37.809 --> 00:35:40.469
on a similar journey. I think one of the mistakes

00:35:40.469 --> 00:35:43.230
that people make while joining networks is to,

00:35:43.280 --> 00:35:46.460
think very very short term like I'll get a project

00:35:46.460 --> 00:35:48.639
I'll get someone who'll work for me I'll get

00:35:48.639 --> 00:35:51.139
clients which of course happens it happens all

00:35:51.139 --> 00:35:55.119
the time but The biggest benefit will come if

00:35:55.119 --> 00:35:57.639
you get the values alignment and if you're on

00:35:57.639 --> 00:36:00.920
the same journey as the other people in the network.

00:36:01.039 --> 00:36:03.500
So that's what I would say, like women in the

00:36:03.500 --> 00:36:06.579
transition mode, just find networks where there

00:36:06.579 --> 00:36:08.659
are other women who are in the transition mode,

00:36:08.760 --> 00:36:11.480
but also on a journey, you know, like I would

00:36:11.480 --> 00:36:14.099
caution against joining groups where you're just

00:36:14.099 --> 00:36:17.280
complaining about your situation and not taking

00:36:17.280 --> 00:36:21.269
any action. Join groups where... women are taking

00:36:21.269 --> 00:36:24.090
action and they can help you and guide you in

00:36:24.090 --> 00:36:26.530
that direction i saw a wonderful quote to this

00:36:26.530 --> 00:36:29.190
end the other day and it was like if you look

00:36:29.190 --> 00:36:31.530
at your circle and you don't have people that

00:36:31.530 --> 00:36:34.409
are aligned with your values, lifting you up,

00:36:34.449 --> 00:36:36.849
helping you with positive self -talk, then you

00:36:36.849 --> 00:36:39.510
don't have a circle, you have a cage. I love

00:36:39.510 --> 00:36:42.090
that. And that's, I feel like that's exactly

00:36:42.090 --> 00:36:43.889
what you're describing. It's like if you, like

00:36:43.889 --> 00:36:45.769
you said, if your networks are actually places

00:36:45.769 --> 00:36:47.789
that people are complaining, holding you back,

00:36:47.869 --> 00:36:50.550
telling you you can't, that idea is stupid, it'll

00:36:50.550 --> 00:36:54.289
never work. you don't have a circle. I love that.

00:36:54.329 --> 00:36:56.949
You have a cage. I'm going to remember that.

00:36:57.070 --> 00:36:58.949
Yeah, no, I obviously stuck with me. I was like,

00:36:59.070 --> 00:37:02.769
yes, so good. No, and if I can talk to the power

00:37:02.769 --> 00:37:04.809
of communities, like I shared a little bit about

00:37:04.809 --> 00:37:07.210
my story, right? Like came here, no money, no

00:37:07.210 --> 00:37:11.050
network, no friends. Like it was through joining

00:37:11.050 --> 00:37:14.070
a community called Crib, which is again a community

00:37:14.070 --> 00:37:17.110
for female founders. Like I found, of course,

00:37:17.110 --> 00:37:19.489
I got like people who gave me work. And then

00:37:19.489 --> 00:37:22.280
once they liked my work, I got more work through

00:37:22.280 --> 00:37:25.539
word of mouth, but I found friends. I found a

00:37:25.539 --> 00:37:27.860
community. I found people who could understand

00:37:27.860 --> 00:37:31.119
my story and my journey. And I didn't feel lonely

00:37:31.119 --> 00:37:33.599
anymore. There is Simone Heng. I'm sure you know

00:37:33.599 --> 00:37:38.860
about her. So Simone talks about loneliness being

00:37:38.860 --> 00:37:42.460
such an epidemic, right? Like it was so lonely

00:37:42.460 --> 00:37:46.639
for me to be like in Singapore as a mother, not

00:37:46.639 --> 00:37:49.579
having any support system or friends or having

00:37:49.579 --> 00:37:52.940
productive. work to do and so my network gave

00:37:52.940 --> 00:37:55.280
me all of that that just spurred me to think

00:37:55.280 --> 00:37:56.820
about like when you were mentioning like kind

00:37:56.820 --> 00:37:58.800
of being alone in motherhood and all that like

00:37:58.800 --> 00:38:00.940
so there's a network that I was a part of and

00:38:00.940 --> 00:38:02.880
I get no need to mention it I'm sure if you're

00:38:02.880 --> 00:38:05.500
a mom in Singapore you know what it is and I

00:38:05.500 --> 00:38:09.119
realized that it was no longer serving me and

00:38:09.119 --> 00:38:12.449
I think it was because you know, by, by the time

00:38:12.449 --> 00:38:14.349
you're a mother of three and again, for me in

00:38:14.349 --> 00:38:15.949
rapid fire, right? So it's like, boom, boom,

00:38:16.010 --> 00:38:18.050
boom. Like this all is very fresh in my mind.

00:38:18.050 --> 00:38:20.110
Right. Because it just happened. It's like, by

00:38:20.110 --> 00:38:22.150
the time you get to that, it's like, yes, I have

00:38:22.150 --> 00:38:24.769
a newborn. Like this is a newborn child, but

00:38:24.769 --> 00:38:27.519
I don't have the concerns. of the newborn moms

00:38:27.519 --> 00:38:29.420
anymore. Because I don't have the fear and uncertainty.

00:38:29.559 --> 00:38:31.599
I don't have the like, how do you use a breast

00:38:31.599 --> 00:38:34.179
pump? Like, we're good, right? So how do you

00:38:34.179 --> 00:38:36.460
know when it's time to reevaluate your networks?

00:38:36.880 --> 00:38:38.340
And you know, it's something that we're seeing

00:38:38.340 --> 00:38:42.019
in Launchpad as well, where it's like when founders

00:38:42.019 --> 00:38:45.539
started with us three years ago, they were just

00:38:45.539 --> 00:38:48.619
starting out. And a lot of our offerings were

00:38:48.619 --> 00:38:51.780
very valuable to them. But now that, you know,

00:38:51.800 --> 00:38:54.699
they have reached a certain stage in their business,

00:38:54.920 --> 00:38:57.420
either they've become very busy. You know, they

00:38:57.420 --> 00:38:59.420
don't have time to take part in the activities

00:38:59.420 --> 00:39:02.420
or it's like they no longer feel in alignment

00:39:02.420 --> 00:39:04.619
with the startup founder because they are like

00:39:04.619 --> 00:39:07.480
a more mature business. You know, they, as I

00:39:07.480 --> 00:39:09.800
was saying, they are making 300 ,000, gunning

00:39:09.800 --> 00:39:11.980
for a million. Their concerns are very different.

00:39:12.039 --> 00:39:13.920
You know, their challenges around maybe building

00:39:13.920 --> 00:39:16.940
a team, their challenges about getting B2B work.

00:39:17.119 --> 00:39:20.860
So I think it's, we... You're absolutely right

00:39:20.860 --> 00:39:23.840
that we should evaluate our networks in terms

00:39:23.840 --> 00:39:26.880
of like, and again, I would say not evaluate

00:39:26.880 --> 00:39:29.659
in terms of like, am I getting clients from this

00:39:29.659 --> 00:39:33.219
network? But am I feeling in alignment with the

00:39:33.219 --> 00:39:36.659
people in this community, right? Are my concerns

00:39:36.659 --> 00:39:40.440
their concerns? Are my stories and their stories

00:39:40.440 --> 00:39:44.050
similar? Or do I feel like... I just don't connect

00:39:44.050 --> 00:39:46.469
with them anymore. And that's when it's a time

00:39:46.469 --> 00:39:48.369
to look for a new network. Yeah, I think you're

00:39:48.369 --> 00:39:49.809
totally right. And again, I think, you know,

00:39:49.829 --> 00:39:51.610
it's funny that you mentioned that because we

00:39:51.610 --> 00:39:53.809
obviously met through Launchpad. So we met through

00:39:53.809 --> 00:39:56.429
this network. And I think what our businesses

00:39:56.429 --> 00:39:59.190
look like now versus two years ago is very different.

00:39:59.630 --> 00:40:01.610
But that's, you know, this is just a free plug

00:40:01.610 --> 00:40:03.949
for Launchpad. I do think actually your network

00:40:03.949 --> 00:40:06.960
does a really good job of growing. like like

00:40:06.960 --> 00:40:09.179
i can grow in that network right so it's not

00:40:09.179 --> 00:40:10.940
just for startups actually yes you know it's

00:40:10.940 --> 00:40:12.619
for every stage of business yeah so and again

00:40:12.619 --> 00:40:15.340
free plug love it yeah i love you yeah in fact

00:40:15.340 --> 00:40:19.440
for those founders who now feel that um there

00:40:19.440 --> 00:40:22.829
is um You know, like the Launchpad offerings

00:40:22.829 --> 00:40:25.269
are like, you know, not enough for them or not

00:40:25.269 --> 00:40:27.650
adding enough value. I have something coming

00:40:27.650 --> 00:40:30.510
up for them later in the year. Very exciting.

00:40:30.750 --> 00:40:33.329
Well, again, speaking of Launchpad, right? It's

00:40:33.329 --> 00:40:36.050
like you stepped into some of the biggest shoes

00:40:36.050 --> 00:40:38.730
in entrepreneurship in Singapore, right? I mean,

00:40:38.730 --> 00:40:40.530
specifically female entrepreneurship, right?

00:40:40.530 --> 00:40:42.409
Chris Edwards, the previous CEO of Launchpad

00:40:42.409 --> 00:40:45.710
Group. You know, you are the first one to have

00:40:45.710 --> 00:40:49.789
the... Correct? The helm? I was going to go with

00:40:49.789 --> 00:40:52.409
both of that. You're the second person to be

00:40:52.409 --> 00:40:54.050
at the helm of Launchpad, right, since it began.

00:40:54.409 --> 00:40:57.670
So how did you navigate taking over someone else's

00:40:57.670 --> 00:41:00.579
vision? And making it your own, making it better,

00:41:00.659 --> 00:41:03.059
making it bigger. Like, how do you do that? Because

00:41:03.059 --> 00:41:04.440
I do think that's something that's happening

00:41:04.440 --> 00:41:07.440
to women in midlife. It's like we are now experienced

00:41:07.440 --> 00:41:11.239
enough to be taking on big roles. So how do you

00:41:11.239 --> 00:41:13.699
face that with confidence? So I think the great

00:41:13.699 --> 00:41:17.380
part here for me was that I was not taking on

00:41:17.380 --> 00:41:20.820
someone else's vision because Chris and my vision

00:41:20.820 --> 00:41:24.559
were aligned. So that's why, you know, like this

00:41:24.559 --> 00:41:28.269
was the first time Chris reached out to me. Instantly,

00:41:28.269 --> 00:41:30.969
my answer was yes, even though, as you said,

00:41:31.050 --> 00:41:33.670
it's a really big step up for me. It's a big

00:41:33.670 --> 00:41:37.050
role, big shoes to fill. But because I, A, I

00:41:37.050 --> 00:41:39.349
had worked in the business intimately, so I knew

00:41:39.349 --> 00:41:42.929
it really well. But B, I knew that when we were

00:41:42.929 --> 00:41:45.760
working together. Our vision was aligned. Our

00:41:45.760 --> 00:41:48.440
values were aligned. The impact we wanted to

00:41:48.440 --> 00:41:51.059
create was the same. And so for me, it really

00:41:51.059 --> 00:41:54.780
felt like just taking on the reins of something

00:41:54.780 --> 00:41:57.820
where we were headed in the same direction. But

00:41:57.820 --> 00:42:00.980
for sure, if it was like someone else's vision,

00:42:01.119 --> 00:42:04.099
it would be very hard. So luckily for me, it

00:42:04.099 --> 00:42:07.199
wasn't. And again, I'm working with someone in

00:42:07.199 --> 00:42:10.219
a coaching capacity right now that has... basically

00:42:10.219 --> 00:42:12.260
been doing that over and over, like going into

00:42:12.260 --> 00:42:14.559
companies and just turning them upside down.

00:42:14.739 --> 00:42:17.179
Amazing. And that is stressful, man. I'll tell

00:42:17.179 --> 00:42:20.099
you what. I mean, it's a wonderful, impact is

00:42:20.099 --> 00:42:22.199
created. Right, right. But talk about a stressful

00:42:22.199 --> 00:42:24.760
situation to try and, you know, convert corporate

00:42:24.760 --> 00:42:26.300
cultures and then leave. Right, right. And then

00:42:26.300 --> 00:42:27.940
do it again to another company and then leave.

00:42:28.019 --> 00:42:29.219
I mean, I have nothing but respect. No, and you

00:42:29.219 --> 00:42:31.960
come in as an outsider. So for me, like I couldn't

00:42:31.960 --> 00:42:34.780
think of buying any other business except Launchpad

00:42:34.780 --> 00:42:37.219
because this is a business that I knew so well.

00:42:37.300 --> 00:42:41.010
I know the team so well. um i knew chris so well

00:42:41.010 --> 00:42:43.369
so it's like this would be the business if i

00:42:43.369 --> 00:42:46.050
had to buy i would buy yeah not any other where

00:42:46.050 --> 00:42:48.570
i'm like coming as a stranger you know yeah now

00:42:48.570 --> 00:42:50.989
that makes total sense well gal we have loved

00:42:50.989 --> 00:42:53.010
having you on today you have given us i mean

00:42:53.010 --> 00:42:54.769
like honestly we could make this entire episode

00:42:54.769 --> 00:42:56.750
into like 50 reels already i mean you've given

00:42:56.750 --> 00:42:59.050
us so many great talking points but the question

00:42:59.050 --> 00:43:03.469
that we always leave with is what is your 40s

00:43:03.469 --> 00:43:05.869
formula what are you giving to women in this

00:43:05.869 --> 00:43:08.530
decade that can help them thrive do better be

00:43:08.530 --> 00:43:11.349
better I'll be very honest. I'm still working

00:43:11.349 --> 00:43:15.309
on the formula. And I think this is a big, you

00:43:15.309 --> 00:43:18.750
know, like I feel proud of myself for saying

00:43:18.750 --> 00:43:20.869
that because I used to be the sort of person

00:43:20.869 --> 00:43:24.030
who would need the 40s formula sorted out at

00:43:24.030 --> 00:43:26.630
the age of 40. And I'm like, I'm still working

00:43:26.630 --> 00:43:29.769
on it. I'm 43, but it's fine. But I can tell

00:43:29.769 --> 00:43:32.429
you the things that I've become very clear on.

00:43:32.550 --> 00:43:36.159
And one is. having clarity about what I want

00:43:36.159 --> 00:43:40.099
and I need. So that is something that's very

00:43:40.099 --> 00:43:43.739
important and I now have. The second thing is

00:43:43.739 --> 00:43:47.920
boundaries. So I have become very... clear and

00:43:47.920 --> 00:43:50.980
open about what I won't accept. And I stated

00:43:50.980 --> 00:43:53.780
that I don't like this. I don't want this and

00:43:53.780 --> 00:43:56.000
I don't accept this. So it's like having the

00:43:56.000 --> 00:44:00.000
boundaries and taking up space, having an abundance

00:44:00.000 --> 00:44:02.940
mindset. So, you know, I've lived my life where

00:44:02.940 --> 00:44:06.159
I've had a lot and we just need to see the news

00:44:06.159 --> 00:44:09.280
in the world to see how privileged we all are

00:44:09.280 --> 00:44:11.860
living the lives that we are. But I've had that

00:44:11.860 --> 00:44:14.079
scarcity mindset where I'm like, oh, this is

00:44:14.079 --> 00:44:16.280
not enough or I'm short of money or I'm short

00:44:16.280 --> 00:44:19.610
of. time i'm short of people so for me 40s is

00:44:19.610 --> 00:44:22.349
really about like i'm going to be in that abundance

00:44:22.349 --> 00:44:26.570
mindset i have so much i can create so much and

00:44:26.570 --> 00:44:28.989
then legacy and impact are the i would say the

00:44:28.989 --> 00:44:32.690
last two pillars of my formula where impact as

00:44:32.690 --> 00:44:35.190
i told you was something that i came upon after

00:44:35.190 --> 00:44:38.289
my dark night of the soul and impact is something

00:44:38.289 --> 00:44:41.409
i want to do uh like i want to create i want

00:44:41.409 --> 00:44:45.159
to help others create because honestly Otherwise,

00:44:45.159 --> 00:44:48.159
life feels meaningless in the sense that, okay,

00:44:48.199 --> 00:44:51.409
I made money and I have a family and... That's

00:44:51.409 --> 00:44:53.329
it. And that's the end of my life. Like I lived

00:44:53.329 --> 00:44:55.690
my life and I ate and I slept and I worked and

00:44:55.690 --> 00:44:57.769
that's it. Like what else did I do? So I feel

00:44:57.769 --> 00:45:00.530
like life for me feels meaningless without having

00:45:00.530 --> 00:45:03.489
created positive impact. And the legacy is all

00:45:03.489 --> 00:45:05.929
tied up around that. Like, you know, I often

00:45:05.929 --> 00:45:08.429
think about this, that on my deathbed, what are

00:45:08.429 --> 00:45:11.530
the things I will look back on in terms of what

00:45:11.530 --> 00:45:14.369
I did to serve the people, to serve the world?

00:45:14.469 --> 00:45:16.630
So I would say those are the five pillars. If

00:45:16.630 --> 00:45:19.670
I can recap. Yeah, this is beautiful. Give us

00:45:19.670 --> 00:45:22.010
the five. Yes. It's clarity, it's boundaries,

00:45:22.329 --> 00:45:24.809
it's abundance, it's impact and it's legacy.

00:45:25.010 --> 00:45:27.389
It's gorgeous. A true formula. We love a good

00:45:27.389 --> 00:45:29.389
formula. We do. We love an actual formula, let's

00:45:29.389 --> 00:45:30.789
be honest. It's something that we don't get very

00:45:30.789 --> 00:45:33.010
often, so we appreciate it when it comes. Thank

00:45:33.010 --> 00:45:34.769
you so much for being here today, Megha. This

00:45:34.769 --> 00:45:36.730
has been wonderful. We've learned a lot. I've

00:45:36.730 --> 00:45:38.329
learned so much. So thank you for being here.

00:45:38.639 --> 00:45:41.360
Thank you for having me. I felt like we've only

00:45:41.360 --> 00:45:43.599
been speaking for five minutes. Time has literally

00:45:43.599 --> 00:45:46.059
flown by. Yeah, it has. Thank you so much for

00:45:46.059 --> 00:45:49.199
giving me this opportunity. Let's be real. Perimenopause

00:45:49.199 --> 00:45:51.519
is a game changer. One day you're cruising along

00:45:51.519 --> 00:45:53.639
and the next your body puts a spanner in the

00:45:53.639 --> 00:45:56.619
works. Sometimes symptoms feel manageable. Others,

00:45:56.800 --> 00:45:59.380
well, let's just say we have to breathe through

00:45:59.380 --> 00:46:02.019
those. And I'm not there quite yet. But the research

00:46:02.019 --> 00:46:04.900
shows that staying strong physically and mentally

00:46:04.900 --> 00:46:07.739
makes a world of difference. That's why GREAT

00:46:07.739 --> 00:46:10.500
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00:46:10.500 --> 00:46:12.420
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exercises, and muscle training. Everything you

00:46:18.380 --> 00:46:21.039
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00:46:33.659 --> 00:46:35.880
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00:46:35.880 --> 00:46:39.000
to feel great. Let's get moving with great. Guys,

00:46:39.059 --> 00:46:41.039
you know we love coffee. And if you want to show

00:46:41.039 --> 00:46:42.500
us some love, you know you can always get us

00:46:42.500 --> 00:46:46.760
one. Just visit buymeacoffee .com slash the 40s

00:46:46.760 --> 00:46:50.730
formula. Cheers. Before we go, please remember

00:46:50.730 --> 00:46:53.110
to hit subscribe and take a moment to support

00:46:53.110 --> 00:46:55.710
The 40s Formula by leaving a review on your favorite

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00:47:02.730 --> 00:47:04.409
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00:47:06.730 --> 00:47:09.989
40s Formula by following us on Instagram at The

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We appreciate your time and support. Thank you

00:47:20.409 --> 00:47:22.210
for being part of this community. And we'll be

00:47:22.210 --> 00:47:23.889
back next week for more empowering conversations

00:47:23.889 --> 00:48:09.019
with inspiring guests. Bye. So Generation Great,

00:48:09.139 --> 00:48:14.179
it's G -R -E -Y, grey, T -T. So it's like basically

00:48:14.179 --> 00:48:17.340
a three -prong lifestyle community for... Over

00:48:17.340 --> 00:48:19.239
50. Yeah, I'll call it over 50. I will not say

00:48:19.239 --> 00:48:21.340
seniors because 50 is too close to be a senior.

00:48:22.039 --> 00:48:23.880
That's too close to my world to be calling it

00:48:23.880 --> 00:48:25.840
seniors. Yeah, the older we get, the younger

00:48:25.840 --> 00:48:29.599
like 50, 60 feels, doesn't it? Yeah, I refuse

00:48:29.599 --> 00:48:30.940
to say seniors at 50.