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So when I say the alpha for most of the women I serve,

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they will not like that word.

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That's why it's also triggering.

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One of the things that I had to do

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in the last couple of years is remove the word successful,

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high achiever from my marketing

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because I realized that my clients don't like it.

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Why, I totally like with it.

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But it's beautiful that we have this conversation, right?

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Hey, hey, and welcome to the 40s Formula,

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your go-to place for insightful discussions

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on navigating the 40s and thriving

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in this transformative decade.

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We're your hosts, Jasmine and Amanda,

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two women that are passionate about exploring

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the challenges and adventures that come with turning 40

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and what lies ahead.

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Ileka Tasker guides business leaders and organizations

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to manage their energy to have more impact.

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With over 10 years of coaching experience,

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a restaurateur, food consultant, and professional speaker,

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Ileka is the trusted advisor for those that seek more peace,

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joy, and harmony personally and professionally.

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She is featured in documentaries with Channel News Asia, Media

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Corps, and is a member of Asia Professional Speakers

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Association.

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Her signature program, the Health Concierge,

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integrates her knowledge of evolutionary biology

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and quantum physics in a lifestyle and coaching support

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system that has guided hundreds of leaders

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to be in the top 10% by reaching physical, mental,

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and emotional well-being.

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So today we have the privilege of interviewing

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one of our wellness colleagues, Ileka Tasker.

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She is a specialist in energy optimization.

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She works with high achievers to reach the next level

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in their careers.

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She has a long and storied list of clients

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that we are so lucky to have here with us today.

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Welcome, Ileka.

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Thank you so much, Lady, for having me.

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I'm so excited to delve into this topic.

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Yeah.

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Let's delve in, girl.

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Let's talk about the reason you're here today, which

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is something that you and I kind of had an off air chat about

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that I thought was so intriguing.

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And that's the concept of the elite alpha.

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So can you talk us through, just first of all,

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how you define it?

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What is the elite alpha?

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And why is this revolutionary in wellness?

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Yeah.

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You know, it's always very difficult

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when I share new topics like this,

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because I'm very conscious of how

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I am where I see things usually before they actually

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hit most people.

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And so elite alpha is one of those.

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And I'm going to tell you, it's also

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going to be one of those things that we're

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going to be talking about for years

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after this conversation.

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But for me, what this definition is,

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is it goes back to a lot of principles

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that I teach around evolution and biology, quantum physics,

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and even anthropology about how we are as humans

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and how we're designed and have been for thousands of years.

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So one of the things that we know from that

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is that we are social creatures.

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We moved in tribes for survival.

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And in those tribes, every single person had a unique gift.

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And that was so important for the tribe's survival.

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And so if you can imagine the men,

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they were the hunters and the women,

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they would want staying in safety in the tribe.

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But within that tribe, there was always

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a woman that had to have more of the alpha gene for that troop

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to survive, for that community to survive.

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And if you can imagine, if all of them

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had that kind of genetic code, that kind of

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wouldn't be too good.

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Truthfully, I don't want everyone to be like me.

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So this comes back to this sort of genome that exists.

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And in my work, I have been starting

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to slowly see the patterns of women

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that I serve noticing, firstly, they're more like me.

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And secondly, they have these traits, not all of them.

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But I would say about 80% of the women,

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and I coach men and women, have this.

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And so I've started, because I look at testing and all that,

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I start to notice that.

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So a couple of things that I've noticed is, from a genome

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point of view, that we look at the blood types.

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They tend to have blood type O.

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Not me.

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Now, blood type O was known as the original blood type,

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the meat eaters, and more of the carnivore.

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Not to say that they are all of that,

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but this was what is linked to that.

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Remember, some people are not on the pathway

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of their most authentic self.

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So they don't even know, they're not even

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behaving the way they should.

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But that's one of the things.

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The other thing is, when we study brain waves and brain

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activity, and not everybody gets their brain studied like I do.

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I am a neuroscientist on the health concierge,

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so I get mine.

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I actually examine.

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But they have more of an alpha brain wave activity.

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The alpha brain wave activity is this slow state.

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So we stay in this higher state of frequencies

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where we just do things with so little effort.

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And this is the other thing that I see.

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When we look at the microbiome, when

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we look at the gut activity, we can also

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start noticing all of the bacteria that we have.

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And so lactobacillus, this is one of those.

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So I see all of that activity happening.

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So interestingly, I am, in my own work,

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starting to understand how do I serve these people even more

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powerfully since it looks like I have a breed of women

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within my community that I need to serve

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in a completely different way and support them

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in a different way.

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So does that kind of give you a bit of feel for it?

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Yeah, it does.

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And there are, because one of the questions is going to be,

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are there commonalities between the elite alphas

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that you see in you, Coach?

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And you're telling me, yes.

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You're seeing brain waves.

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You're seeing it in gut health.

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You're seeing it in, obviously, behavior as well.

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Yeah, diet.

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I just want to try and figure out.

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So you said that you get this elite alpha in a tribe,

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like a female, who we need to keep everyone together.

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Was that just for the females?

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Or is there then an elite alpha who

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tends to be the male who then keeps everyone in check?

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Because, yeah, I mean, usually when you think of alpha,

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you do think of males.

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But I don't know.

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I'm trying to get my head around this whole thing.

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Yeah.

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That's it.

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I love that.

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I think in this conversation, I'd

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love to break it down into the work, the relationships,

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and the health of these elite alphas

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and how I distinguish it by those categories.

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But to answer your question, yes, in the males,

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we see it as well.

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So just look at the studies that they do around chimps.

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Look at their brilliance activity.

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Look what they do.

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They show their balls.

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They show.

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And actually, when they studied them,

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they literally can see that more alpha one has bigger balls.

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Yeah.

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Literally.

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Oh, I've heard that.

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So yes, we see it.

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And these are conversations that, honestly, I

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like to put a trigger a lot when I talk about some

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of these things.

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Because I know it's really triggering for some people

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to talk about these things.

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Imagine I'm telling them that there is a group of women that

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may be more elite in how they can do things.

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Now, I'm not saying they're elite in all ways.

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I'm going to talk about the weaknesses.

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But it can be triggering for some people.

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But yes, in men, it's obvious.

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We see this.

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We see it when we look in our community.

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We see that guy that doesn't have a problem in getting women,

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doesn't have a problem in reaching the top of his career.

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And we'll say, I remember speaking to an old client of mine.

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And he said he works for one of the big four tech companies.

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And he said, Anika, to be honest with you, I look at my team.

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And there's so much more clever than I am.

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I'm surrounded by super intelligent beings.

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And I will tell you, the reason I've got my job

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is because of how I look, because of where I come from,

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and because when you put me in front of the countries

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that I serve, like China, like Thailand,

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like the Philippines, like Malaysia,

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me being present in those rooms will mean

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that we can close the end deals.

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That's the truth.

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That's the truth.

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And that is, like you said, hard pill to swallow for folks.

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My husband is one of these folks.

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He's going to hate me for bringing stuff.

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But in time, here's the deal.

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So my husband is exactly who you described.

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He is physically attractive.

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He's so good.

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But he owns a room, never had a problem getting girls,

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was always like, you know, like, any people hate this.

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But it's true.

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That's never been something he had to try for.

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It just happens, right?

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And then with his career, same thing, right?

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He has been, he went to medical school.

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You know, he's reached like Asian elite status, right?

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Based on, he's a doctor, successful businessman, whatever.

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Here's the thing, though.

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This is what I want to bring up.

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He would never identify as an elite alpha.

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He never would.

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And I think, you know, he would identify as this,

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like the thing that the teens are saying right now.

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So Sigma, this is the whole Gen Z.

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The Sigma is apparently the guy who's like,

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and the guy, gal, whoever,

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you're successful, but you're a loner.

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You don't find that.

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That's my husband.

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Right?

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And this is where my husband would, I think,

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maybe accept that he's an elite Sigma.

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He's not successful because of his handsomeness.

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He's not successful because he followed the crowd

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of Asians going to medical school.

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No, he actually did something wildly different.

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Yeah.

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And again, on paper, it was a certain way

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that I think he would say that he lived his life

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quite independently, uniquely.

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I mean, Marion Arnmoke was like one of the ways

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in which I think it shows his Sigma status.

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Yeah.

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It's different.

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Can you talk to me about, is there an intersection

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between the alphas and the lone wolves,

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or are they the same?

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Yeah.

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I mean, you know, this is what I love

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about these sorts of things,

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because it depends which bit you want in zoning.

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Because if I was zoning on alpha,

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and I think of brainwave activity, right?

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If we were to study his brainwave activity, right?

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Is it theta? Is it more theta?

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So then we might go, look, he's predominantly in alpha.

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If you've studied my brainwave activity,

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I'm in alpha, so much.

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So it really depends.

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But what we do know is, again, when we look at the tribe

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and we look at the individual roles in the tribe,

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there had to be somebody that was out on their own

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on the lookout.

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You'd stick that person on the lookout for danger.

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So what did that person develop in their skills?

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They learned to be good or lone.

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They learned like a primal instinct

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that to look out for danger,

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but not need somebody else to feed them information.

264
00:10:25,900 --> 00:10:27,180
Maybe it was their environment.

265
00:10:27,180 --> 00:10:29,100
Maybe it was the senses.

266
00:10:29,100 --> 00:10:31,340
Different senses were developed to do that.

267
00:10:31,340 --> 00:10:34,380
So you could say that the lone wolf,

268
00:10:34,380 --> 00:10:36,380
you know, their social creature at some point

269
00:10:36,380 --> 00:10:40,420
when they were born, in a hospital bed or at home,

270
00:10:40,420 --> 00:10:41,260
in the camp.

271
00:10:41,260 --> 00:10:42,100
Cave.

272
00:10:42,100 --> 00:10:42,940
Cave.

273
00:10:44,020 --> 00:10:45,940
Amanda, I think we need to let our listeners know

274
00:10:45,940 --> 00:10:47,060
that we don't just use The Meat Club

275
00:10:47,060 --> 00:10:48,700
because they're a sponsor of the show.

276
00:10:48,700 --> 00:10:51,620
They're a sponsor of the show because we love what they bring.

277
00:10:51,620 --> 00:10:52,820
It is so true, Jasmine.

278
00:10:52,820 --> 00:10:54,860
It has been over a year with The Meat Club.

279
00:10:54,860 --> 00:10:57,420
And I can confidently say they have been cooking at home

280
00:10:57,420 --> 00:10:59,100
so much easier.

281
00:10:59,100 --> 00:11:01,180
Their grass-fed beef, organic chicken,

282
00:11:01,180 --> 00:11:03,660
and wild-caught seafood are the best quality

283
00:11:03,660 --> 00:11:04,660
you get in Singapore.

284
00:11:04,660 --> 00:11:07,180
And let's not forget, it's ethically sourced.

285
00:11:07,180 --> 00:11:08,900
Yes, and beyond the quality,

286
00:11:08,900 --> 00:11:11,660
their subscription service is next level.

287
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When you subscribe, you'll unlock $140 worth of rewards

288
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like on your second delivery, two exclusive Meat Club hats.

289
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290
00:11:21,780 --> 00:11:25,060
On your sixth delivery, a beautiful wooden chopping board.

291
00:11:25,060 --> 00:11:27,660
And by your eighth delivery, a $30 voucher

292
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to use on your favorites.

293
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It's like they are rewarding you

294
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for making healthy choices for your family.

295
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296
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297
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298
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299
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300
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301
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302
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303
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304
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305
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306
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307
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308
00:12:03,860 --> 00:12:08,020
And follow them on Instagram at at The Meat Club SG

309
00:12:08,020 --> 00:12:11,620
for exclusive content, cooking tips, and special offers.

310
00:12:11,620 --> 00:12:14,100
The Meat Club, rewarding families like yours

311
00:12:14,100 --> 00:12:16,980
with premium quality every single time.

312
00:12:16,980 --> 00:12:18,700
Now, back to the chat.

313
00:12:47,500 --> 00:12:49,860
Very much still social creatures.

314
00:12:49,860 --> 00:12:51,860
So going back to relationships,

315
00:12:51,860 --> 00:12:54,660
when you have an elite alpha female,

316
00:12:54,660 --> 00:12:59,660
is she attracted to or a particular type of male?

317
00:13:00,060 --> 00:13:02,660
Now, I'm just trying to see, like, two outlets.

318
00:13:02,660 --> 00:13:03,580
Does that work?

319
00:13:03,580 --> 00:13:06,540
Is it, because when I've seen certain,

320
00:13:06,540 --> 00:13:08,820
you know, you will see a female who's, like,

321
00:13:08,820 --> 00:13:13,100
maybe more domineering, dominant in a relationship.

322
00:13:13,100 --> 00:13:15,540
Generally, her partner tends to be a bit more quiet.

323
00:13:15,540 --> 00:13:17,380
And does that work better?

324
00:13:17,380 --> 00:13:22,380
Like, what do you kind of find in terms of energies and...

325
00:13:23,260 --> 00:13:24,540
What is this actually called?

326
00:13:24,540 --> 00:13:25,380
Relationships.

327
00:13:25,380 --> 00:13:27,740
Yeah, and just like, that's all right.

328
00:13:27,740 --> 00:13:31,620
Well, you know, how I teach my elite alphas

329
00:13:33,100 --> 00:13:34,940
is exactly what I would do for myself,

330
00:13:34,940 --> 00:13:36,620
because I put myself in that category.

331
00:13:36,620 --> 00:13:38,540
So let's talk a little bit about the feminine

332
00:13:38,540 --> 00:13:42,260
and masculine energy to explain that principle.

333
00:13:42,260 --> 00:13:44,900
So these are not gender principles.

334
00:13:44,900 --> 00:13:46,620
These are energetic principles.

335
00:13:46,620 --> 00:13:49,260
Every single person has feminine and masculine energy.

336
00:13:49,260 --> 00:13:50,620
So men have it and women have it.

337
00:13:50,620 --> 00:13:52,460
The feminine energy is that part of us

338
00:13:52,460 --> 00:13:53,980
that is more flowing, more creative.

339
00:13:53,980 --> 00:13:56,980
Think about dance, think about art, think about nature.

340
00:13:56,980 --> 00:13:59,180
And the masculine container is more structured.

341
00:13:59,180 --> 00:14:01,780
Think about processes, think about systems, right?

342
00:14:01,780 --> 00:14:06,060
So if I think about it in the sense of the river,

343
00:14:06,060 --> 00:14:08,020
the river is just flowing.

344
00:14:08,020 --> 00:14:10,580
She sees a rock, she manages to go over it,

345
00:14:10,580 --> 00:14:14,420
she waves it around, she goes over the waterfall.

346
00:14:14,420 --> 00:14:17,260
But the river needs a riverbank,

347
00:14:17,260 --> 00:14:21,220
because without the riverbank, that's a flood, right?

348
00:14:21,220 --> 00:14:23,500
There's no doubt, there's nothing to contain it.

349
00:14:23,500 --> 00:14:26,220
So that is how I would translate feminine and masculine.

350
00:14:26,220 --> 00:14:31,220
So what I see is that these types of strong women,

351
00:14:31,340 --> 00:14:34,060
definition of strong, let's keep that open for now,

352
00:14:34,060 --> 00:14:37,100
what they need is a strong riverbank.

353
00:14:37,100 --> 00:14:39,140
They need a strong container.

354
00:14:39,140 --> 00:14:42,060
So if they have a guy that's, for example,

355
00:14:42,060 --> 00:14:44,220
you know, got issues with his self-worth

356
00:14:44,220 --> 00:14:47,060
or he's still trying to figure out who he is in his life,

357
00:14:47,060 --> 00:14:49,260
especially around purpose,

358
00:14:49,260 --> 00:14:51,100
if he's still trying to figure out that,

359
00:14:51,100 --> 00:14:53,660
unfortunately, he's not going to have the capacity

360
00:14:53,660 --> 00:14:57,340
to manage and hold the container of the power of this woman.

361
00:14:57,340 --> 00:14:59,060
So of course, then you're gonna get into this,

362
00:14:59,060 --> 00:15:02,260
oh, she's too in a masculine, oh, she's too domineering.

363
00:15:02,260 --> 00:15:03,660
You're gonna hear all those things there.

364
00:15:03,660 --> 00:15:05,300
No, she's not.

365
00:15:05,300 --> 00:15:06,860
She is elite.

366
00:15:06,860 --> 00:15:09,260
And she just needs a strong container.

367
00:15:09,260 --> 00:15:11,420
And do you have that strong container

368
00:15:11,420 --> 00:15:14,660
in which to contain her, right?

369
00:15:14,660 --> 00:15:17,220
And so that's what I see if you're done

370
00:15:17,220 --> 00:15:18,060
answering the relationships.

371
00:15:18,060 --> 00:15:20,140
And that's why you see that sometimes

372
00:15:20,140 --> 00:15:22,700
what these elite alphas will go for

373
00:15:22,700 --> 00:15:26,420
is they will go for a guy that's not super into like,

374
00:15:26,420 --> 00:15:28,380
having a successful career

375
00:15:28,380 --> 00:15:30,420
and being the top of his game in all of these things.

376
00:15:30,420 --> 00:15:33,460
He's not like the six-pack guy or anything like that.

377
00:15:33,460 --> 00:15:38,140
But actually, he tends to have more of a structured career.

378
00:15:38,140 --> 00:15:40,820
So you tend to see things like engineers,

379
00:15:40,820 --> 00:15:45,060
tech people, like the stable kind of,

380
00:15:45,060 --> 00:15:47,700
what do we call them, blue collar type jobs, right?

381
00:15:47,700 --> 00:15:49,900
They seem to have more of those that they provide,

382
00:15:49,900 --> 00:15:52,300
they put the food on the table, there's more stability.

383
00:15:52,300 --> 00:15:53,900
There's not the, unfortunately,

384
00:15:53,900 --> 00:15:55,700
the highs and the lows of an entrepreneur

385
00:15:55,700 --> 00:15:58,260
where you don't know if the money's coming in one day.

386
00:15:58,260 --> 00:16:01,460
That doesn't really give her that sense of safety and security.

387
00:16:01,460 --> 00:16:02,660
Not to say it can't be.

388
00:16:02,660 --> 00:16:05,700
Again, all of us can do our individual inner work

389
00:16:05,700 --> 00:16:07,740
and get to the prime of that.

390
00:16:07,740 --> 00:16:10,540
And then what you see in her is that

391
00:16:10,540 --> 00:16:15,100
if she doesn't have that, she can't settle.

392
00:16:15,100 --> 00:16:17,820
So she starts to question herself,

393
00:16:17,820 --> 00:16:20,580
or maybe I should be less, a little bit less.

394
00:16:20,580 --> 00:16:23,100
Maybe I shouldn't go for that promotion.

395
00:16:23,100 --> 00:16:24,580
And all of those things.

396
00:16:24,580 --> 00:16:25,500
Does that explain it?

397
00:16:25,500 --> 00:16:26,340
Yeah.

398
00:16:26,340 --> 00:16:29,940
And just really quickly, does it work the same with guys?

399
00:16:29,940 --> 00:16:32,660
For example, if you've got an elite guy,

400
00:16:32,660 --> 00:16:35,060
is he better off with an elite female,

401
00:16:35,060 --> 00:16:39,060
or do you find that he will then tend to feel better

402
00:16:39,060 --> 00:16:42,340
with somebody who's maybe a little bit on the back then?

403
00:16:42,340 --> 00:16:44,580
You know how they always say behind every successful man

404
00:16:44,580 --> 00:16:46,420
is a strong woman.

405
00:16:46,420 --> 00:16:47,260
Yeah.

406
00:16:47,260 --> 00:16:48,180
Is it true?

407
00:16:48,180 --> 00:16:51,700
You know, I believe that everybody

408
00:16:51,700 --> 00:16:53,380
has a different phase of their life.

409
00:16:53,380 --> 00:16:56,380
So if this was my son, I would say,

410
00:16:56,380 --> 00:16:59,460
earlier in his life, I'd say, go do your education,

411
00:16:59,460 --> 00:17:01,660
get the education that you need with children.

412
00:17:01,660 --> 00:17:04,060
I don't mean go and send them to our current education system

413
00:17:04,060 --> 00:17:07,020
right now, but go get the education that you need.

414
00:17:07,020 --> 00:17:10,460
And then if you think about 20s and then the early 20s,

415
00:17:10,460 --> 00:17:11,900
they're coming out of their education.

416
00:17:11,900 --> 00:17:14,060
That's to me a time where a guy in his life

417
00:17:14,060 --> 00:17:16,500
should be accumulating as much knowledge

418
00:17:16,500 --> 00:17:19,380
and as much skills, as much wisdom as he possibly can.

419
00:17:19,380 --> 00:17:21,940
Having mentors and doing a million things as possible

420
00:17:21,940 --> 00:17:23,980
and finding their niche, right?

421
00:17:23,980 --> 00:17:26,500
And at this point, if they meet this woman,

422
00:17:26,500 --> 00:17:27,940
really what they should find is,

423
00:17:27,940 --> 00:17:30,380
who is the woman that's going to support

424
00:17:30,380 --> 00:17:31,900
their career development?

425
00:17:31,900 --> 00:17:34,140
Who is the woman that when they're going out

426
00:17:34,140 --> 00:17:35,980
and they enter this point where they know what they wanna do

427
00:17:35,980 --> 00:17:37,940
and then they're building their career,

428
00:17:37,940 --> 00:17:40,780
who is the woman that could sit and support that?

429
00:17:40,780 --> 00:17:43,180
To be honest, is that the woman, being honest,

430
00:17:43,180 --> 00:17:45,140
that's gonna be out all the time, every day,

431
00:17:45,140 --> 00:17:46,940
like building their own career?

432
00:17:46,940 --> 00:17:47,940
Unlikely.

433
00:17:47,940 --> 00:17:49,380
Does he wanna have children?

434
00:17:49,380 --> 00:17:51,700
You know, again, is this the woman

435
00:17:51,700 --> 00:17:53,980
that she's putting her career aside at this time

436
00:17:53,980 --> 00:17:55,500
when he's building his career?

437
00:17:55,500 --> 00:17:57,700
And again, I'm not allowing for age differences

438
00:17:57,700 --> 00:17:58,700
or anything here.

439
00:17:58,700 --> 00:18:00,060
Is this the woman that's going to allow that

440
00:18:00,060 --> 00:18:02,460
or is this the woman that's gonna be happy to nurture,

441
00:18:02,460 --> 00:18:05,260
take care of the children while he's building his career?

442
00:18:05,260 --> 00:18:06,300
So do you see?

443
00:18:06,300 --> 00:18:08,860
But again, in my prime in my life, right,

444
00:18:08,860 --> 00:18:13,220
I'm 42 right now, and I have this beautiful ability

445
00:18:13,220 --> 00:18:15,460
to be able to select.

446
00:18:15,460 --> 00:18:18,060
And having been married before and having seen,

447
00:18:18,060 --> 00:18:21,300
had an amazing partner, but I hadn't done my inner work,

448
00:18:21,300 --> 00:18:23,700
we hadn't done our inner work, I met him when I was 17.

449
00:18:23,700 --> 00:18:27,100
Like having this amazing opportunity that I have now

450
00:18:27,100 --> 00:18:31,260
to reselect from the tribe, I am making decisions

451
00:18:31,260 --> 00:18:33,020
because I understand this is the most important decision

452
00:18:33,020 --> 00:18:33,860
I can make.

453
00:18:33,860 --> 00:18:37,860
But for example, I tend to date upwards in terms of age.

454
00:18:38,860 --> 00:18:41,260
And when I look at that guy, I think about,

455
00:18:41,260 --> 00:18:44,420
okay, well, if he's already got his career,

456
00:18:44,420 --> 00:18:46,620
made himself, knows who he is,

457
00:18:46,620 --> 00:18:49,540
does he care if his partner's more alpha?

458
00:18:49,540 --> 00:18:50,860
No, right?

459
00:18:50,860 --> 00:18:52,100
So depends on the season.

460
00:18:52,100 --> 00:18:53,500
Yeah.

461
00:18:53,500 --> 00:18:55,700
Amanda, you know how much I love little farms?

462
00:18:55,700 --> 00:18:57,860
Well, guess what, they've just come on as a sponsor

463
00:18:57,860 --> 00:19:00,220
and I am so bloody excited.

464
00:19:00,220 --> 00:19:01,060
Oh, me too.

465
00:19:01,060 --> 00:19:03,420
I love that little farms isn't just a grocery store.

466
00:19:03,420 --> 00:19:06,660
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467
00:19:06,660 --> 00:19:09,180
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468
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Same and their commitment to whole food nutrition is amazing.

469
00:19:12,660 --> 00:19:14,620
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470
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471
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472
00:19:18,460 --> 00:19:21,500
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473
00:19:21,500 --> 00:19:23,900
That is one of the reasons that I trust them so much.

474
00:19:23,900 --> 00:19:26,660
Every product on their shelves has been carefully vetted,

475
00:19:26,660 --> 00:19:28,900
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476
00:19:28,900 --> 00:19:29,980
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477
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478
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479
00:19:34,340 --> 00:19:36,860
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480
00:19:36,860 --> 00:19:38,700
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481
00:19:38,700 --> 00:19:41,100
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482
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483
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484
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485
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486
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487
00:19:54,540 --> 00:19:56,900
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488
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489
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490
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491
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492
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493
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494
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495
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496
00:20:16,620 --> 00:20:18,140
Now back to the chat.

497
00:20:19,620 --> 00:20:21,180
So seasonal match, I hear that.

498
00:20:21,180 --> 00:20:23,820
And I'm also telling you this, Mary, before,

499
00:20:23,820 --> 00:20:25,380
and for a lot of the reasons you're describing,

500
00:20:25,380 --> 00:20:28,980
it was like, you know, in the world where we are never,

501
00:20:28,980 --> 00:20:32,340
who knows, but in that season was not the right time.

502
00:20:32,340 --> 00:20:34,380
Because there is, you know, there's seasonality

503
00:20:34,380 --> 00:20:38,060
to even these like, like you said, archetypes, right?

504
00:20:38,060 --> 00:20:40,460
I'm most interested in the health dimension, right?

505
00:20:40,460 --> 00:20:43,100
So obviously that is like my biggest passion,

506
00:20:43,100 --> 00:20:44,580
what I do for work.

507
00:20:44,580 --> 00:20:48,660
How does an elite athlete differ in her health practices

508
00:20:48,660 --> 00:20:50,620
in the way that she embodies her health?

509
00:20:50,620 --> 00:20:53,060
Like where do you see the elite alphas

510
00:20:53,060 --> 00:20:54,140
excelling through health?

511
00:20:54,140 --> 00:20:57,180
Yeah, well, because she can do it all,

512
00:20:57,180 --> 00:20:59,060
doesn't mean she should do it all.

513
00:20:59,060 --> 00:21:02,740
And so, you know, sometimes when you have an abundance

514
00:21:02,740 --> 00:21:05,740
of something, you don't really appreciate it.

515
00:21:05,740 --> 00:21:08,260
So let's relate this to, let's imagine water.

516
00:21:08,260 --> 00:21:11,700
In some countries in the world, a tap dripping water,

517
00:21:11,700 --> 00:21:13,860
you'd be like, what, oh my gosh,

518
00:21:13,860 --> 00:21:16,020
because there's a scarcity mindset around water.

519
00:21:16,020 --> 00:21:17,860
Whereas all of us, let's be honest,

520
00:21:17,860 --> 00:21:19,980
we don't have a problem if we shower too long,

521
00:21:19,980 --> 00:21:21,900
if the tap drips a little bit, we're not.

522
00:21:21,900 --> 00:21:23,540
Because we have an abundance of it.

523
00:21:23,540 --> 00:21:27,140
We tend to have more of an abundance of our energy.

524
00:21:27,140 --> 00:21:28,860
And because we have an abundance of energy,

525
00:21:28,860 --> 00:21:32,460
unfortunately, we are not managing it well.

526
00:21:32,460 --> 00:21:34,860
So we give it to everything, everyone,

527
00:21:34,860 --> 00:21:36,780
a ton of places, a ton of people.

528
00:21:36,780 --> 00:21:39,020
And so for us, it's actually quite easy

529
00:21:39,020 --> 00:21:42,740
to have this burnout, to suffer from the autoimmune ceases

530
00:21:42,740 --> 00:21:45,580
because we just pour and pour and pour.

531
00:21:45,580 --> 00:21:47,020
And here's our to-do list.

532
00:21:47,020 --> 00:21:48,140
Oh, you want me to do that as well?

533
00:21:48,140 --> 00:21:48,980
Oh yeah, I can.

534
00:21:48,980 --> 00:21:50,060
Oh, okay.

535
00:21:50,060 --> 00:21:52,820
And we just add and add and add to our to-do list.

536
00:21:52,820 --> 00:21:55,300
So one of the things that I also notice

537
00:21:55,300 --> 00:21:59,180
that we have to take away to-do lists from us

538
00:21:59,180 --> 00:22:01,580
because we just know how to add to it.

539
00:22:01,580 --> 00:22:04,820
So when I look at the health, I think about, okay,

540
00:22:04,820 --> 00:22:08,060
if this is a person that is gonna go, go, go, go, go,

541
00:22:08,060 --> 00:22:11,740
she's gonna burn out her adrenal glands for sure, right?

542
00:22:11,740 --> 00:22:13,420
She's gonna have the thyroid issues.

543
00:22:13,420 --> 00:22:15,060
She's probably already had burnout

544
00:22:15,060 --> 00:22:17,100
or is on the way to burnout, right?

545
00:22:17,100 --> 00:22:20,700
So how do I take care of, from an organ point of view,

546
00:22:20,700 --> 00:22:22,980
how do I nurture these organs, right?

547
00:22:22,980 --> 00:22:24,900
That are responsible for managing energy,

548
00:22:24,900 --> 00:22:26,780
anything around metabolism, right?

549
00:22:26,780 --> 00:22:29,420
I also need to look after her liver because guess what?

550
00:22:29,420 --> 00:22:31,700
She tends to have all of that energy.

551
00:22:31,700 --> 00:22:33,180
She tends to be more fiery.

552
00:22:33,180 --> 00:22:34,780
So the liver in Chinese medicine

553
00:22:34,780 --> 00:22:37,140
is also managing the emotion of anger.

554
00:22:37,140 --> 00:22:39,260
So on an emotional level, I need to look at things

555
00:22:39,260 --> 00:22:41,820
like anger and resentment in her life.

556
00:22:41,820 --> 00:22:44,900
So I work a lot on the emotional capacity of those emotions

557
00:22:44,900 --> 00:22:46,780
and how she works through those, right?

558
00:22:46,780 --> 00:22:48,820
So on the emotional side, on the mental wellbeing,

559
00:22:48,820 --> 00:22:50,220
there's that, on the physical side,

560
00:22:50,220 --> 00:22:52,820
there's let me look at her movement patterns

561
00:22:52,820 --> 00:22:55,380
and let me look at does she have yin,

562
00:22:55,380 --> 00:22:58,300
more softer, more nurturing, more nourishing?

563
00:22:58,300 --> 00:23:00,380
Because this lady, she's gonna be like,

564
00:23:00,380 --> 00:23:01,500
you want me to lift weights?

565
00:23:01,500 --> 00:23:02,980
How much, how heavy do you want me to lift?

566
00:23:02,980 --> 00:23:04,580
Exactly, exactly, what you got.

567
00:23:04,580 --> 00:23:05,780
Yeah, yeah.

568
00:23:05,780 --> 00:23:07,820
So I'm like, okay.

569
00:23:07,820 --> 00:23:09,900
So she's not gonna have a problem

570
00:23:09,900 --> 00:23:12,260
in me getting her to work out.

571
00:23:12,260 --> 00:23:15,700
She's gonna have a problem in me getting her to balance,

572
00:23:15,700 --> 00:23:18,180
as we would say in Asia, the yin and the yang,

573
00:23:18,180 --> 00:23:20,500
to balance the more harder workouts

574
00:23:20,500 --> 00:23:22,220
where she's sweating, she knows she's pushing it,

575
00:23:22,220 --> 00:23:24,940
she knows she's worked out hard with the,

576
00:23:24,940 --> 00:23:27,980
are you okay doing a bit of yin, yoga, some stuff?

577
00:23:27,980 --> 00:23:29,420
Are you okay with just stretching today?

578
00:23:29,420 --> 00:23:31,260
I was just gonna say, are you okay with a day off?

579
00:23:31,260 --> 00:23:32,580
Yeah, yeah, yeah, exactly.

580
00:23:32,580 --> 00:23:34,260
Like this is terrifying. Exactly.

581
00:23:34,260 --> 00:23:35,860
It is, it is.

582
00:23:35,860 --> 00:23:38,020
You know, are you okay with a walk in park

583
00:23:38,020 --> 00:23:40,540
and just observing nature?

584
00:23:40,540 --> 00:23:41,980
You can imagine, right? Yeah.

585
00:23:41,980 --> 00:23:43,660
So I need to balance that.

586
00:23:43,660 --> 00:23:45,500
So we can see these different elements

587
00:23:45,500 --> 00:23:46,940
in the physical body.

588
00:23:46,940 --> 00:23:49,980
I'm working on combination of the yin and the yang,

589
00:23:49,980 --> 00:23:52,660
the soft and the hard in her workouts.

590
00:23:52,660 --> 00:23:57,180
In the mental body, I'm looking at where does she have space?

591
00:23:57,180 --> 00:24:00,460
Space for ideas and new things to come in

592
00:24:00,460 --> 00:24:02,380
without her having to get it through,

593
00:24:02,380 --> 00:24:05,140
having to work harder, having to ask a million people,

594
00:24:05,140 --> 00:24:06,580
having to read a ton of books,

595
00:24:06,580 --> 00:24:08,540
having to listen to a ton of podcasts.

596
00:24:08,540 --> 00:24:10,660
She can get those downloads that she needs

597
00:24:10,660 --> 00:24:13,980
by creating space for her mind to receive new insights

598
00:24:13,980 --> 00:24:16,380
is a co-creation always with the universe.

599
00:24:16,380 --> 00:24:19,220
In her emotional body, I'm looking at those emotions

600
00:24:19,220 --> 00:24:22,100
that tend to be more fiery, so the anger, the resentment.

601
00:24:22,100 --> 00:24:23,540
And then in the nutrition,

602
00:24:23,540 --> 00:24:25,060
I'm looking at things like adaptogens.

603
00:24:25,060 --> 00:24:26,740
She needs adaptogens, right?

604
00:24:26,740 --> 00:24:28,740
So I'm looking at things like the adaptogens

605
00:24:28,740 --> 00:24:30,860
like Tulsi Ashwagandha that help her

606
00:24:30,860 --> 00:24:33,220
to calm her nervous system.

607
00:24:33,220 --> 00:24:34,060
It's really weird.

608
00:24:34,060 --> 00:24:36,500
I genuinely feel like you have been describing me

609
00:24:36,500 --> 00:24:38,380
to a certain, to a fairly extent.

610
00:24:38,380 --> 00:24:40,420
Yeah, I've got type, I'm an O-negative.

611
00:24:40,420 --> 00:24:41,260
Oh, my clay is really sweet.

612
00:24:41,260 --> 00:24:42,900
I've got thyroid issues. Yeah.

613
00:24:42,900 --> 00:24:44,660
I've got, you know, like,

614
00:24:44,660 --> 00:24:46,620
I feel like I've always got things I need to do.

615
00:24:46,620 --> 00:24:49,820
I don't really take a moment to just switch off.

616
00:24:49,820 --> 00:24:52,100
Like, even when I'm walking, I'll be listening to a podcast

617
00:24:52,100 --> 00:24:53,860
that I need to get things in.

618
00:24:53,860 --> 00:24:57,660
But I don't feel like I am an elite alpha.

619
00:24:57,660 --> 00:24:58,660
Yeah. Why?

620
00:24:58,660 --> 00:24:59,500
I don't know.

621
00:24:59,500 --> 00:25:03,900
And I'm wondering, I have no idea.

622
00:25:03,900 --> 00:25:05,460
Like, these are things I feel like,

623
00:25:05,460 --> 00:25:06,580
oh yeah, you know, that sounds like me,

624
00:25:06,580 --> 00:25:09,020
that sounds like me, that sounds like me.

625
00:25:09,020 --> 00:25:13,380
But I don't know if I, now, the way I am now,

626
00:25:13,380 --> 00:25:15,620
whether I'm gonna be that person who will go into a room

627
00:25:15,620 --> 00:25:16,540
and try to dominate.

628
00:25:16,540 --> 00:25:20,620
Maybe in the past, I may have had moments of,

629
00:25:20,620 --> 00:25:23,140
okay, this is my time to shine.

630
00:25:23,140 --> 00:25:24,420
But I don't know, can you change?

631
00:25:24,420 --> 00:25:25,260
Can you take a step?

632
00:25:25,260 --> 00:25:26,100
I'll tell you why.

633
00:25:26,100 --> 00:25:27,260
I'll tell you why you don't relate to it.

634
00:25:27,260 --> 00:25:28,900
Because I totally feel you.

635
00:25:29,860 --> 00:25:31,900
Firstly, words have meanings.

636
00:25:31,900 --> 00:25:33,540
If you speak multiple languages, you'll understand,

637
00:25:33,540 --> 00:25:34,580
especially in the English language,

638
00:25:34,580 --> 00:25:36,620
where there's like one word for love.

639
00:25:36,620 --> 00:25:39,260
So I love my back the same way as I love you, right?

640
00:25:39,260 --> 00:25:40,100
Yeah.

641
00:25:40,100 --> 00:25:42,860
The words are just the meanings we associate with them.

642
00:25:42,860 --> 00:25:45,380
When I say butterfly and cockroach,

643
00:25:45,380 --> 00:25:47,700
animals, but look at the meaning you have.

644
00:25:47,700 --> 00:25:49,780
So this is our cognitive bias.

645
00:25:49,780 --> 00:25:51,340
So when I say the alpha,

646
00:25:51,340 --> 00:25:53,140
for most of the women that I serve,

647
00:25:53,140 --> 00:25:54,380
they will not like that word.

648
00:25:54,380 --> 00:25:56,580
That's why it's also triggering.

649
00:25:56,580 --> 00:25:57,700
One of the things that I had to do

650
00:25:57,700 --> 00:26:00,580
in the last couple of years is remove the word successful,

651
00:26:00,580 --> 00:26:02,980
high achiever from my marketing.

652
00:26:02,980 --> 00:26:04,740
Because I've realized that my clients don't like it.

653
00:26:04,740 --> 00:26:06,700
I don't like it, but.

654
00:26:06,700 --> 00:26:09,780
It's beautiful that we have this conversation, right?

655
00:26:09,780 --> 00:26:11,580
Because I know that my clients, they don't relate to that.

656
00:26:11,580 --> 00:26:12,660
You know why?

657
00:26:12,660 --> 00:26:15,260
When we've experienced life in the way that we've had,

658
00:26:15,260 --> 00:26:16,500
and we've had these burnouts,

659
00:26:16,500 --> 00:26:17,980
and we've done the call for women,

660
00:26:17,980 --> 00:26:18,820
go, go, go, go, go,

661
00:26:18,820 --> 00:26:20,540
and we've burned our body out,

662
00:26:20,540 --> 00:26:23,420
our emotional, our mental wellbeing has taken a toll.

663
00:26:23,420 --> 00:26:26,940
We start noticing all of the beliefs that we had

664
00:26:26,940 --> 00:26:28,020
that led us to that.

665
00:26:28,020 --> 00:26:31,020
And some of those are related to those meanings

666
00:26:31,020 --> 00:26:33,140
that we have when we think of the word elite alpha.

667
00:26:33,140 --> 00:26:35,420
And actually, what I say about my clients

668
00:26:35,420 --> 00:26:37,940
is they're extremely heart-centered.

669
00:26:37,940 --> 00:26:40,260
What that means is they give a ton of themselves

670
00:26:40,260 --> 00:26:42,260
to people, places, and things,

671
00:26:42,260 --> 00:26:44,260
and they put themselves last.

672
00:26:44,260 --> 00:26:46,220
And that's usually one of the reasons

673
00:26:46,220 --> 00:26:48,380
why they get to the burnout state.

674
00:26:48,380 --> 00:26:51,380
And so what we are is deeply loving,

675
00:26:51,380 --> 00:26:54,940
deeply nurturing, deeply heart-centered women.

676
00:26:54,940 --> 00:26:57,500
And does that mean then that I have to be the top

677
00:26:57,500 --> 00:26:58,900
of the game, the competitor, and all that?

678
00:26:58,900 --> 00:27:00,860
Doesn't mean that I don't have these natures,

679
00:27:00,860 --> 00:27:02,940
but do I wanna be that person that go, go, go,

680
00:27:02,940 --> 00:27:07,300
like, no, I always knew, even when I was in corporate,

681
00:27:07,300 --> 00:27:09,100
and I had to be at the top of my game

682
00:27:09,100 --> 00:27:11,180
because they measured me by my numbers,

683
00:27:11,180 --> 00:27:12,980
how much money am I putting on the board.

684
00:27:12,980 --> 00:27:16,060
Even then, I knew there was a part of me that was like,

685
00:27:16,060 --> 00:27:20,220
I wanna do this with people holding onto me on the way up,

686
00:27:20,220 --> 00:27:22,020
not stepping on people on the way up.

687
00:27:22,020 --> 00:27:25,460
And the reason I left was that part of me

688
00:27:25,460 --> 00:27:28,780
that wasn't allowed to do that in order to be successful,

689
00:27:28,780 --> 00:27:30,180
I couldn't buy into it.

690
00:27:30,180 --> 00:27:34,100
I hate hierarchy, I hate it.

691
00:27:34,100 --> 00:27:36,460
And so that part of me that would look at,

692
00:27:36,460 --> 00:27:37,540
that would speak to the cleaner

693
00:27:37,540 --> 00:27:39,780
the same way I'd speak to my VP,

694
00:27:39,780 --> 00:27:41,860
I realized that that wasn't gonna get me success

695
00:27:41,860 --> 00:27:43,380
in that environment.

696
00:27:43,380 --> 00:27:47,580
And so I believe that that might be part of why some of us,

697
00:27:47,580 --> 00:27:49,540
when we hear these words, elite alpha,

698
00:27:49,540 --> 00:27:51,900
professional high achievement, we're like,

699
00:27:51,900 --> 00:27:53,740
yeah, could be.

700
00:27:53,740 --> 00:27:58,100
Yeah, and I always think about the concept of eliteness

701
00:27:58,100 --> 00:28:02,140
or alphaness or whatever associated closely with age.

702
00:28:02,140 --> 00:28:06,380
So for me, and this is a direct example from like my,

703
00:28:06,380 --> 00:28:09,460
and those listening, very amateurish crossfit career.

704
00:28:09,460 --> 00:28:13,020
So here I am 41, about to be 42,

705
00:28:13,020 --> 00:28:14,860
so I'm in the 40 to 44 age group.

706
00:28:14,860 --> 00:28:17,380
I'm mildly competitive, mildly, right?

707
00:28:17,380 --> 00:28:19,860
I am okay, I will never be the last.

708
00:28:19,860 --> 00:28:21,540
I will never be the winner.

709
00:28:21,540 --> 00:28:25,700
But I always joke, when I'm in the 70 to 75 age group,

710
00:28:25,700 --> 00:28:27,620
I'm gonna be taking names.

711
00:28:27,620 --> 00:28:31,180
I'm not gonna lie, because what I don't ever do

712
00:28:31,180 --> 00:28:33,860
is give up or take a break or take a pause.

713
00:28:33,860 --> 00:28:36,660
As competitive as I am now is as competitive as I was

714
00:28:36,660 --> 00:28:39,500
when I was 14 in gymnastics is as competitive as I'm gonna be

715
00:28:39,500 --> 00:28:42,540
at 75 with those old ass ladies lifting that barbell.

716
00:28:42,540 --> 00:28:46,620
And so it's like, I technically get more elite as I age

717
00:28:46,620 --> 00:28:51,620
simply because I don't slow down or I don't give up.

718
00:28:51,780 --> 00:28:55,420
I allow the best of my ability and that gets better

719
00:28:55,420 --> 00:28:57,580
as I get older because my peers fall back.

720
00:28:57,580 --> 00:29:01,700
I couldn't agree with you more.

721
00:29:01,700 --> 00:29:04,900
I say to people, if you think this now of me, watch me.

722
00:29:05,940 --> 00:29:08,300
Because I tell you, I have not even hit my prime.

723
00:29:08,300 --> 00:29:10,900
I get better with age, like why in what I tell you,

724
00:29:10,900 --> 00:29:11,980
I get wiser.

725
00:29:11,980 --> 00:29:16,980
And I know, oh my gosh, I so believe this to be true.

726
00:29:17,380 --> 00:29:20,060
And exactly like you, when I was younger,

727
00:29:20,060 --> 00:29:21,420
I was a natural athlete.

728
00:29:21,420 --> 00:29:24,380
So I remember doing my first half marathon.

729
00:29:24,380 --> 00:29:26,780
I only went to Amsterdam because I could go

730
00:29:26,780 --> 00:29:27,940
on a binge weekend.

731
00:29:27,940 --> 00:29:30,740
And so I was like, okay, I'll go, I'll go.

732
00:29:30,740 --> 00:29:33,260
But you know, my coach was like,

733
00:29:33,260 --> 00:29:34,980
if you could just train properly.

734
00:29:34,980 --> 00:29:39,260
And then I did the half marathon, I came ninth female

735
00:29:39,260 --> 00:29:41,740
and I did it in one hour, 26.

736
00:29:41,740 --> 00:29:43,220
Wow, amazing.

737
00:29:43,220 --> 00:29:45,060
Yeah, you know, and-

738
00:29:45,060 --> 00:29:46,980
For the non-routing community, that's a great time.

739
00:29:46,980 --> 00:29:48,860
That's a real good time.

740
00:29:48,860 --> 00:29:51,500
And I promise you, I didn't train.

741
00:29:51,500 --> 00:29:54,740
I just like, you know, shut rocked up and had a good time.

742
00:29:54,740 --> 00:29:59,740
But back then that was because also I didn't need to.

743
00:30:00,420 --> 00:30:01,260
Right?

744
00:30:01,260 --> 00:30:03,900
And so, and those are part of me that would do

745
00:30:03,900 --> 00:30:06,300
what I needed to do and still have the competitive strike.

746
00:30:06,300 --> 00:30:08,740
But the thing that you really needed to be to do the best,

747
00:30:08,740 --> 00:30:09,580
I would never do it.

748
00:30:09,580 --> 00:30:11,460
I never cared enough about that.

749
00:30:11,460 --> 00:30:13,220
Because what I cared, what do I care?

750
00:30:13,220 --> 00:30:15,260
The relationships, the social side of it,

751
00:30:15,260 --> 00:30:16,500
the people side of it.

752
00:30:16,500 --> 00:30:19,060
So when I got into my corporate career, it was the same.

753
00:30:19,060 --> 00:30:21,380
I was always in those top few billers in the corporate.

754
00:30:21,380 --> 00:30:23,420
I was in consultancy, I was in HR, I did recruitment.

755
00:30:23,420 --> 00:30:25,020
I was always in those top few billers.

756
00:30:25,020 --> 00:30:26,020
Would I be number one?

757
00:30:26,020 --> 00:30:26,940
Never, why?

758
00:30:26,940 --> 00:30:28,980
Because you know what I had to do to be number one?

759
00:30:28,980 --> 00:30:30,300
I wasn't prepared to do it.

760
00:30:30,300 --> 00:30:31,780
I wasn't prepared to do it, right?

761
00:30:31,780 --> 00:30:35,820
And so as I go, you guys know that I deeply value

762
00:30:35,820 --> 00:30:37,660
human design as part of my work.

763
00:30:37,660 --> 00:30:39,860
Because it really gives me and the clients

764
00:30:39,860 --> 00:30:41,780
this roadmap to our authentic self.

765
00:30:41,780 --> 00:30:43,380
And in human design, we have these different types

766
00:30:43,380 --> 00:30:46,540
of profiles and one of them is a line, call it a line six.

767
00:30:46,540 --> 00:30:48,620
And a line six, which is what I have,

768
00:30:48,620 --> 00:30:50,220
is considered a role model.

769
00:30:50,220 --> 00:30:52,540
But basically what it means is the first 30 years

770
00:30:52,540 --> 00:30:55,300
of our life is just trying and testing.

771
00:30:55,300 --> 00:30:57,740
And good and bad.

772
00:30:57,740 --> 00:30:59,140
So whenever you meet a six line,

773
00:30:59,140 --> 00:31:01,780
you know they've been through crap, right?

774
00:31:01,780 --> 00:31:04,740
And so the beautiful thing of it is the six lines,

775
00:31:04,740 --> 00:31:07,060
we start to hit our prime at 50.

776
00:31:07,060 --> 00:31:09,060
Wow, you're eight years away?

777
00:31:09,060 --> 00:31:10,860
Yeah, so that means I know,

778
00:31:10,860 --> 00:31:12,820
and yeah, I could know intellectually,

779
00:31:12,820 --> 00:31:15,740
but I'm experiencing it, I'm experiencing right now.

780
00:31:15,740 --> 00:31:17,700
But there's a part of me that's like,

781
00:31:17,700 --> 00:31:20,260
I do still feel the bruises of what I had to go through

782
00:31:20,260 --> 00:31:22,780
in my life and I still feel a bit sore,

783
00:31:22,780 --> 00:31:25,100
but I can tell it's over.

784
00:31:25,100 --> 00:31:26,300
And there's a part of me that's like,

785
00:31:26,300 --> 00:31:28,700
really, I get to have this life

786
00:31:28,700 --> 00:31:30,980
because I have a cellular memory of my old life.

787
00:31:30,980 --> 00:31:33,620
And then there's this other part of me that sees how,

788
00:31:33,620 --> 00:31:37,700
yes, a bit like you, that I can see that when I'm 50,

789
00:31:37,700 --> 00:31:40,420
because I'm so consistent in my habits

790
00:31:40,420 --> 00:31:43,100
and they're so integrated, I will continue to do this.

791
00:31:43,100 --> 00:31:45,260
And the people that try this diet will fail

792
00:31:45,260 --> 00:31:46,580
because they just try it.

793
00:31:46,580 --> 00:31:48,740
The people that do this exercise at this extreme,

794
00:31:48,740 --> 00:31:50,580
they won't be able to do it.

795
00:31:50,580 --> 00:31:53,860
Exactly, and I'll watch them go through their binges

796
00:31:53,860 --> 00:31:55,820
of whatever the newest thing that's in trend.

797
00:31:55,820 --> 00:31:57,900
And I will continue to do what human beings have done

798
00:31:57,900 --> 00:31:59,660
for thousands and thousands of years.

799
00:31:59,660 --> 00:32:02,340
And I will continue to prioritize my relationships

800
00:32:02,340 --> 00:32:03,860
as the number one factor in my wellbeing.

801
00:32:03,860 --> 00:32:06,740
And that will always mean that I won't be extreme in anything

802
00:32:06,740 --> 00:32:09,100
because that's probably gonna sacrifice my relationships,

803
00:32:09,100 --> 00:32:12,220
but I will do good in all of it.

804
00:32:12,220 --> 00:32:15,780
And that is such a powerful way of framing it, right?

805
00:32:15,780 --> 00:32:18,780
Is that you are not doing anything that is crazy,

806
00:32:18,780 --> 00:32:22,500
extreme, insane, and I think when you hear Elite Alpha,

807
00:32:22,500 --> 00:32:24,940
you think they've got secrets, right?

808
00:32:24,940 --> 00:32:28,380
They're doing something that the rest of us can't achieve

809
00:32:28,380 --> 00:32:30,820
or attain because it's so far beyond.

810
00:32:30,820 --> 00:32:31,900
Yeah, we're not like that.

811
00:32:31,900 --> 00:32:33,140
Yeah, we're not like that, exactly.

812
00:32:33,140 --> 00:32:33,980
We can never have that.

813
00:32:33,980 --> 00:32:35,660
What I'm hearing you saying is that it's actually

814
00:32:35,660 --> 00:32:38,780
by kind of scaling back to your authentic self

815
00:32:38,780 --> 00:32:41,380
and to what humans authentically are

816
00:32:41,380 --> 00:32:43,700
that's giving, that's allowing you to have that.

817
00:32:43,700 --> 00:32:44,540
That's it.

818
00:32:44,540 --> 00:32:46,660
Because there's something in our genome that knows,

819
00:32:46,660 --> 00:32:49,260
think about, sometimes it's the same in human design,

820
00:32:49,260 --> 00:32:51,140
we talk about this, everybody's looking at it

821
00:32:51,140 --> 00:32:53,500
from the perspective of now, but you have to think about,

822
00:32:53,500 --> 00:32:57,100
we were designed to live in a different environment now.

823
00:32:57,100 --> 00:33:00,380
Every single organ, muscle, tissue, our thoughts,

824
00:33:00,380 --> 00:33:03,620
everything is heart-wide, our nervous system's heart-wide

825
00:33:03,620 --> 00:33:05,700
for a completely different environment to what it's now.

826
00:33:05,700 --> 00:33:08,260
So as technology is advancing at the speed of light,

827
00:33:08,260 --> 00:33:10,700
evolutionary terms, we don't evolve that fast.

828
00:33:10,700 --> 00:33:11,540
We're still the same.

829
00:33:11,540 --> 00:33:12,460
We're still the same.

830
00:33:12,460 --> 00:33:14,900
And so when I look back, I think about things like,

831
00:33:14,900 --> 00:33:16,980
the fact that, for example, food.

832
00:33:16,980 --> 00:33:19,780
Like, the elite outfit, she would have been able

833
00:33:19,780 --> 00:33:21,980
to go longer periods of time in giving her food

834
00:33:21,980 --> 00:33:24,860
to her tribal members to take care of them,

835
00:33:24,860 --> 00:33:27,620
to nurture them and to nourish them, because she can,

836
00:33:27,620 --> 00:33:29,620
I mean, I just started fasting,

837
00:33:29,620 --> 00:33:31,100
I was gonna do a 24-hour fast,

838
00:33:31,100 --> 00:33:32,540
it turned out to be 72 hours.

839
00:33:32,540 --> 00:33:33,380
I'm like, go for it.

840
00:33:33,380 --> 00:33:34,340
We're like, 72 hours?

841
00:33:34,340 --> 00:33:35,860
I'm like, that's just so me.

842
00:33:35,860 --> 00:33:37,700
It's like, I woke up that morning, my body's like,

843
00:33:37,700 --> 00:33:39,340
I'm still not ready to eat, and I just keep on going,

844
00:33:39,340 --> 00:33:40,460
I keep on going, I keep on going.

845
00:33:40,460 --> 00:33:42,980
But I make sure everybody else is fed, right?

846
00:33:42,980 --> 00:33:44,100
And because think about it,

847
00:33:44,100 --> 00:33:45,540
there wouldn't have been food available,

848
00:33:45,540 --> 00:33:47,100
so there needed to be one person

849
00:33:47,100 --> 00:33:49,700
that was able to go longer without it.

850
00:33:49,700 --> 00:33:51,500
We go...

851
00:33:51,500 --> 00:33:53,540
Now I'm laughing because I think about me.

852
00:33:53,540 --> 00:33:54,380
Yeah, yeah.

853
00:33:54,380 --> 00:33:57,940
Because up until maybe six weeks ago,

854
00:33:57,940 --> 00:34:01,900
I was fasting three times a week for 36 hours.

855
00:34:01,900 --> 00:34:05,020
Prior to that, my longest fast was 72 hours,

856
00:34:05,020 --> 00:34:07,780
and I'm still feeding my kids, making food for my husband,

857
00:34:07,780 --> 00:34:09,860
you know, making sure everyone else is fed.

858
00:34:09,860 --> 00:34:11,100
Okay, so now I'm starting to think,

859
00:34:11,100 --> 00:34:13,700
huh, they might, you know, maybe I have to be out

860
00:34:13,700 --> 00:34:16,060
for without realizing I am.

861
00:34:16,060 --> 00:34:17,740
Yeah, and it's everything.

862
00:34:17,740 --> 00:34:19,820
Like, if we built something, right,

863
00:34:19,820 --> 00:34:21,940
a storm could have come at home.

864
00:34:21,940 --> 00:34:25,020
And remember, again, think about our primal ancestors.

865
00:34:25,020 --> 00:34:26,220
You know, men would have been out hunting,

866
00:34:26,220 --> 00:34:27,340
so of course they need that.

867
00:34:27,340 --> 00:34:29,460
One of the women, if they couldn't come back

868
00:34:29,460 --> 00:34:32,180
with enough food, still needed to make sure everyone's okay.

869
00:34:32,180 --> 00:34:34,940
But think about the environment.

870
00:34:34,940 --> 00:34:37,100
Like, let's say in our camp, right?

871
00:34:37,100 --> 00:34:39,780
The camp could have, the storm could have blown it away,

872
00:34:39,780 --> 00:34:41,660
burned it away, anything could have happened.

873
00:34:41,660 --> 00:34:44,220
And we would need that instinct in us to,

874
00:34:44,220 --> 00:34:46,260
no, don't worry, we can rebuild it.

875
00:34:46,260 --> 00:34:48,460
And if you watch how we are, like,

876
00:34:48,460 --> 00:34:51,540
I see this sometimes in my business.

877
00:34:51,540 --> 00:34:52,860
I see it in relationships as well.

878
00:34:52,860 --> 00:34:54,780
Sometimes if I'm like, I don't like it,

879
00:34:54,780 --> 00:34:56,980
I will literally burn the whole thing down.

880
00:34:56,980 --> 00:34:59,140
I will like take all my videos down.

881
00:34:59,140 --> 00:35:02,140
I will like go, scrap it, and I'll just do it again.

882
00:35:02,140 --> 00:35:04,900
Somebody else would be like, okay, no, no, no,

883
00:35:04,900 --> 00:35:05,740
that takes a bit of time.

884
00:35:05,740 --> 00:35:07,340
And they would take longer to do it,

885
00:35:07,340 --> 00:35:08,500
and they would do it properly,

886
00:35:08,500 --> 00:35:09,740
but they wouldn't burn it.

887
00:35:09,740 --> 00:35:11,420
I would just start the whole thing again.

888
00:35:11,420 --> 00:35:13,580
If you look at my life, you will see,

889
00:35:13,580 --> 00:35:16,140
just in Singapore, the 14 years of Singapore,

890
00:35:16,140 --> 00:35:17,940
I've had my corporate career.

891
00:35:17,940 --> 00:35:19,900
Then I left there with burnout.

892
00:35:19,900 --> 00:35:23,060
I had my restaurant career, where I was told

893
00:35:23,060 --> 00:35:25,460
one in 10 survived the restaurant industry,

894
00:35:25,460 --> 00:35:27,100
a leaker, in three months.

895
00:35:27,100 --> 00:35:28,540
So we would love to give you advice,

896
00:35:28,540 --> 00:35:30,340
but you're not probably gonna be here.

897
00:35:30,340 --> 00:35:32,500
That's what an elite alpha woman,

898
00:35:32,500 --> 00:35:35,140
that's what she told me when I went to her for advice

899
00:35:35,140 --> 00:35:36,580
on how I could run my restaurant business.

900
00:35:36,580 --> 00:35:37,860
She went, literally told me,

901
00:35:37,860 --> 00:35:38,860
there's no point in me telling you,

902
00:35:38,860 --> 00:35:39,700
because you won't survive,

903
00:35:39,700 --> 00:35:41,220
because one in 10 survived the first three months.

904
00:35:41,220 --> 00:35:43,500
I was like, okay, thank you, Ivy.

905
00:35:43,500 --> 00:35:48,500
So, you know, and then my third career is, you know,

906
00:35:48,900 --> 00:35:51,340
after selling the restaurant, my second burnout,

907
00:35:51,340 --> 00:35:55,260
and God be willing, I got the download

908
00:35:55,260 --> 00:35:56,740
that I had to let go of the restaurant,

909
00:35:56,740 --> 00:35:58,180
I sold the restaurant successfully.

910
00:35:58,180 --> 00:35:59,380
Then my third career started,

911
00:35:59,380 --> 00:36:01,220
which is really an accumulation of everything,

912
00:36:01,220 --> 00:36:02,340
which is the health concierge,

913
00:36:02,340 --> 00:36:03,740
and my coaching and lifestyle support.

914
00:36:03,740 --> 00:36:06,260
But the point is, I've literally burned down

915
00:36:06,260 --> 00:36:09,460
whole careers and started again from nothing.

916
00:36:09,460 --> 00:36:11,300
And when I say I started again from nothing,

917
00:36:11,300 --> 00:36:12,540
when I left my corporate career,

918
00:36:12,540 --> 00:36:15,100
you imagine leaving a six figure job to run a restaurant,

919
00:36:15,100 --> 00:36:16,780
you know, if people don't know,

920
00:36:16,780 --> 00:36:18,020
restaurants are not where you make your money.

921
00:36:18,020 --> 00:36:19,380
Yeah, yeah, yeah.

922
00:36:19,380 --> 00:36:22,460
Newsflash, not the cash cow you wanted to be.

923
00:36:22,460 --> 00:36:24,300
When I sold my restaurant, you know,

924
00:36:24,300 --> 00:36:28,100
I did well, I won't lie, but I took a year off.

925
00:36:28,100 --> 00:36:30,780
I have worked since the age of nine.

926
00:36:30,780 --> 00:36:33,460
I took my first year off, right?

927
00:36:33,460 --> 00:36:36,300
And what I did is because I believe money is energy,

928
00:36:36,300 --> 00:36:38,700
I didn't want, I felt that money was attached

929
00:36:38,700 --> 00:36:41,460
to an energy that I no longer wanted to be a part of, right?

930
00:36:41,460 --> 00:36:43,860
The extreme is part of my nature.

931
00:36:43,860 --> 00:36:47,860
And so I basically retired my mom and my family in Spain,

932
00:36:47,860 --> 00:36:50,820
and I literally started again, empty bank account,

933
00:36:50,820 --> 00:36:52,980
and started, we get to do this,

934
00:36:52,980 --> 00:36:56,420
we get to rebuild from a different energy.

935
00:36:56,420 --> 00:36:58,540
And that's because, guess what she also has?

936
00:36:58,540 --> 00:37:00,220
She has this part of her genome,

937
00:37:00,220 --> 00:37:02,140
which is the resurrection gene.

938
00:37:02,140 --> 00:37:05,620
The ability to burn the whole thing down and start again.

939
00:37:05,620 --> 00:37:06,460
Is that a good thing?

940
00:37:06,460 --> 00:37:08,380
Honestly, I don't think it is.

941
00:37:08,380 --> 00:37:10,500
But just because we can doesn't mean we shouldn't.

942
00:37:10,500 --> 00:37:11,340
But she can.

943
00:37:11,340 --> 00:37:12,180
Yeah.

944
00:37:12,180 --> 00:37:13,580
Yeah, and I'm hearing that, girl.

945
00:37:13,580 --> 00:37:16,220
I mean, I think I have some of those tendencies as well,

946
00:37:16,220 --> 00:37:19,460
which is, you know, to cut, run, rebirth, right?

947
00:37:19,460 --> 00:37:20,940
I think that's like very, you know,

948
00:37:20,940 --> 00:37:22,980
but at the same time, I think there's also like,

949
00:37:22,980 --> 00:37:25,260
you can still connect the dots.

950
00:37:25,260 --> 00:37:26,660
You know, like there's nothing,

951
00:37:26,660 --> 00:37:28,700
I would assume, given what you just shared.

952
00:37:28,700 --> 00:37:30,820
You can't say the person you work in corporate

953
00:37:30,820 --> 00:37:32,060
is not the person you work.

954
00:37:32,060 --> 00:37:32,900
Right?

955
00:37:32,900 --> 00:37:34,900
Like there's still a thread of connection.

956
00:37:34,900 --> 00:37:35,740
Yes.

957
00:37:35,740 --> 00:37:37,460
And it's really clear for me from corporate,

958
00:37:37,460 --> 00:37:39,380
I didn't know that one of my biggest things,

959
00:37:39,380 --> 00:37:41,940
because, you know, I started my career in HR

960
00:37:41,940 --> 00:37:43,180
and CIPD and qualified.

961
00:37:43,180 --> 00:37:46,180
My thing in corporate was this HR people side.

962
00:37:46,180 --> 00:37:48,740
When I started restaurant industry, you know what?

963
00:37:48,740 --> 00:37:50,500
It took me three months to learn the business.

964
00:37:50,500 --> 00:37:52,180
My chef walked out on me in three months.

965
00:37:52,180 --> 00:37:53,900
I literally sat in my business going,

966
00:37:53,900 --> 00:37:56,820
I have put 350,000 of my own personal investment in this.

967
00:37:56,820 --> 00:37:58,260
How the hell am I gonna do this?

968
00:37:58,260 --> 00:38:00,060
Sat in an empty restaurant going,

969
00:38:00,060 --> 00:38:02,140
and okay, I made it work.

970
00:38:02,140 --> 00:38:03,260
I turned it around.

971
00:38:03,260 --> 00:38:05,380
But you know what the thing was?

972
00:38:05,380 --> 00:38:07,140
I had 50% staff turnover.

973
00:38:07,140 --> 00:38:09,260
That's the turnover in restaurant industries.

974
00:38:09,260 --> 00:38:11,260
Sometimes more, 50% staff turnover.

975
00:38:11,260 --> 00:38:13,500
That's the equivalent of training your staff

976
00:38:13,500 --> 00:38:14,980
in three months, knowing they're not gonna be here

977
00:38:14,980 --> 00:38:16,380
and you have to do the whole thing again.

978
00:38:16,380 --> 00:38:18,660
You can imagine why that took the second burnout, right?

979
00:38:18,660 --> 00:38:22,380
So, but what was helping me was my HR background,

980
00:38:22,380 --> 00:38:25,540
the people management, my ability to hire, recruit,

981
00:38:25,540 --> 00:38:27,940
and train all of that from my previous career.

982
00:38:27,940 --> 00:38:29,540
When I started the HealthCon series, of course,

983
00:38:29,540 --> 00:38:31,580
I was like, I sat there having all these downloads,

984
00:38:31,580 --> 00:38:34,380
epiphany moments of my year out going, oh wow.

985
00:38:34,380 --> 00:38:37,300
Now I understand, God, why you have to take this away from me.

986
00:38:37,300 --> 00:38:40,140
I do not need a restaurant and operations

987
00:38:40,140 --> 00:38:41,620
to serve people powerfully.

988
00:38:41,620 --> 00:38:42,460
I don't need that.

989
00:38:42,460 --> 00:38:43,300
Thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you.

990
00:38:43,300 --> 00:38:45,060
I can't, I can't, no, I promise I'm gonna do this again.

991
00:38:45,060 --> 00:38:46,660
Yeah, I needed lessons.

992
00:38:46,660 --> 00:38:47,780
Yeah, I needed lessons.

993
00:38:47,780 --> 00:38:48,620
And what did I learn?

994
00:38:48,620 --> 00:38:51,780
I took all of the suppliers that I brought into Singapore,

995
00:38:51,780 --> 00:38:53,180
all of the functional medicine doctors,

996
00:38:53,180 --> 00:38:55,460
the physios, the personal trainers, the reikis,

997
00:38:55,460 --> 00:38:57,900
all of these people that healed my body and my clients

998
00:38:57,900 --> 00:38:59,220
in all of these burnouts.

999
00:38:59,220 --> 00:39:01,180
And I pulled all of them all together

1000
00:39:01,180 --> 00:39:02,500
to create my expert panel.

1001
00:39:02,500 --> 00:39:04,420
And then my own experience, right,

1002
00:39:04,420 --> 00:39:06,740
of two burnouts and going, I'm not doing this again.

1003
00:39:06,740 --> 00:39:07,900
I'm doing inner work.

1004
00:39:07,900 --> 00:39:10,460
I'm gonna rewire my nervous system and my brain

1005
00:39:10,460 --> 00:39:12,180
so that I'm not in these patterns again.

1006
00:39:12,180 --> 00:39:14,300
And so that was the thread that I brought through

1007
00:39:14,300 --> 00:39:15,140
into the HealthCon series.

1008
00:39:15,140 --> 00:39:16,940
So yes, you're absolutely right.

1009
00:39:16,940 --> 00:39:20,020
Last question before we get to our real, real last question

1010
00:39:20,020 --> 00:39:21,180
about the Elite Alpha.

1011
00:39:22,340 --> 00:39:23,860
Whether you perceive that you're not one

1012
00:39:23,860 --> 00:39:26,180
or whether you know you're not one, let's just say,

1013
00:39:26,180 --> 00:39:28,660
are there lessons, are there things

1014
00:39:28,660 --> 00:39:31,900
that the Elite Alphas do that if we're trying to become

1015
00:39:31,900 --> 00:39:34,500
more like the Elite Alpha, is it things that they do

1016
00:39:34,500 --> 00:39:37,660
that people who are not can start moving towards?

1017
00:39:37,660 --> 00:39:39,860
So if you feel like, you know, you're someone

1018
00:39:39,860 --> 00:39:41,940
that's maybe toward the other end of the spectrum, right?

1019
00:39:41,940 --> 00:39:43,740
It was like, I actually don't have my shit together.

1020
00:39:43,740 --> 00:39:47,220
I actually struggle every day to kind of like get going

1021
00:39:47,220 --> 00:39:48,140
and get moving.

1022
00:39:48,140 --> 00:39:50,180
What are some of the tangibles from the Elite Alpha

1023
00:39:50,180 --> 00:39:51,020
experience?

1024
00:39:51,020 --> 00:39:53,700
Yes, the number one is mindset.

1025
00:39:53,700 --> 00:39:56,060
She has a mindset, and I give this to Marie Folio.

1026
00:39:56,060 --> 00:39:57,100
She's got a point that I know,

1027
00:39:57,100 --> 00:39:59,140
which is everything is figure outable.

1028
00:39:59,140 --> 00:40:03,780
Like in our lives, like if you tell me,

1029
00:40:03,780 --> 00:40:05,140
I don't think that could be done.

1030
00:40:05,140 --> 00:40:07,980
My brain is only figuring out how I'm gonna get it done.

1031
00:40:07,980 --> 00:40:10,740
By the time you think of that sentence.

1032
00:40:10,740 --> 00:40:15,180
To me, it's not in my vocabulary, I can't, right?

1033
00:40:15,180 --> 00:40:20,180
So like how I perceive the world is my heart has a desire.

1034
00:40:20,220 --> 00:40:22,060
I don't use my brain first for my desires.

1035
00:40:22,060 --> 00:40:23,380
My brain will get me into crap

1036
00:40:23,380 --> 00:40:26,260
and it will get me doing, getting people pleasing.

1037
00:40:26,260 --> 00:40:28,060
I don't use my brain first, I use my heart.

1038
00:40:28,060 --> 00:40:29,780
And here's the thing about the Elite Alpha,

1039
00:40:29,780 --> 00:40:32,820
remember, she has a very good primal instinct

1040
00:40:32,820 --> 00:40:34,300
as well as intuition.

1041
00:40:34,300 --> 00:40:37,340
So the primal is an ability, a physical power

1042
00:40:37,340 --> 00:40:38,900
to get things done.

1043
00:40:38,900 --> 00:40:42,180
But she also has a very good intuitive instinct,

1044
00:40:42,180 --> 00:40:43,140
which is what she needed to do

1045
00:40:43,140 --> 00:40:44,980
to navigate around her environment.

1046
00:40:44,980 --> 00:40:48,060
So I go to my primal gut, my sacral gut,

1047
00:40:48,060 --> 00:40:49,340
in human design, my sacral.

1048
00:40:49,340 --> 00:40:52,180
So I go to my primal gut and my gut tells me in that moment,

1049
00:40:52,180 --> 00:40:53,460
it's this, it's this, it's this.

1050
00:40:53,460 --> 00:40:55,300
My heart is telling me my desire.

1051
00:40:55,300 --> 00:40:57,020
You desire this, you desire this.

1052
00:40:57,020 --> 00:40:58,420
And then I go to my brain and I go,

1053
00:40:58,420 --> 00:41:01,140
you tell me my encyclopedia, tell me how I'm gonna do it.

1054
00:41:01,140 --> 00:41:03,020
Go through the background in my encyclopedia,

1055
00:41:03,020 --> 00:41:05,140
open the page, show me, show me, show me the how.

1056
00:41:05,140 --> 00:41:05,980
And that's how I am.

1057
00:41:05,980 --> 00:41:08,980
So the mindset that you need in this,

1058
00:41:08,980 --> 00:41:11,220
in the Elite Alpha Heart is this mindset

1059
00:41:11,220 --> 00:41:14,180
that I just need to figure out the how.

1060
00:41:14,180 --> 00:41:15,940
Not the what, not can, not, not.

1061
00:41:15,940 --> 00:41:18,620
I forget about my desires for people don't like it,

1062
00:41:18,620 --> 00:41:20,820
no, just show me the how.

1063
00:41:20,820 --> 00:41:23,540
Now your brain is going to start looking for that

1064
00:41:23,540 --> 00:41:25,260
because this is the beautiful thing about the brain,

1065
00:41:25,260 --> 00:41:27,340
the brain will do exactly what you tell it to do.

1066
00:41:27,340 --> 00:41:29,340
So if you tell it, I'm a victim, I can't.

1067
00:41:29,340 --> 00:41:30,980
Then you're a victim, I can't.

1068
00:41:30,980 --> 00:41:32,580
If you tell it, I have this desire,

1069
00:41:32,580 --> 00:41:33,900
can you show me how I can do this?

1070
00:41:33,900 --> 00:41:35,340
It'll start looking for it.

1071
00:41:35,340 --> 00:41:37,540
So that's a really, really, really important one

1072
00:41:37,540 --> 00:41:39,100
before we get into anything else.

1073
00:41:39,100 --> 00:41:43,060
Secondly, I think that the Elite Alpha knows

1074
00:41:43,060 --> 00:41:47,220
that in the tribe that there are gonna be

1075
00:41:47,220 --> 00:41:48,980
those people that have different gifts

1076
00:41:48,980 --> 00:41:50,580
that can support a Nobel League.

1077
00:41:50,580 --> 00:41:52,540
But she also knows if she used to get up

1078
00:41:52,540 --> 00:41:54,500
and move to another tribe, we're gonna look at her and go,

1079
00:41:54,500 --> 00:41:55,340
who the hell are you?

1080
00:41:55,340 --> 00:41:56,420
You don't belong to us.

1081
00:41:56,420 --> 00:41:58,660
Like what, like this, excuse me, who are you?

1082
00:41:58,660 --> 00:42:00,540
Like get out, kill her, right?

1083
00:42:00,540 --> 00:42:03,860
So she knows who her tribe are.

1084
00:42:03,860 --> 00:42:05,140
She knows her people.

1085
00:42:05,140 --> 00:42:09,060
Like I say, you know, I've got a business partner

1086
00:42:09,060 --> 00:42:11,420
that I do some work with on the Helion and I love her

1087
00:42:11,420 --> 00:42:13,660
because this is someone that so sees me.

1088
00:42:13,660 --> 00:42:15,540
And sometimes she comes to me, she's like,

1089
00:42:15,540 --> 00:42:17,940
Amika, you know, I don't know how to tell you this.

1090
00:42:17,940 --> 00:42:19,260
I'm like, they don't like me.

1091
00:42:19,260 --> 00:42:22,700
I'm like, babe, believe you me,

1092
00:42:22,700 --> 00:42:24,900
I have to learn the hard way.

1093
00:42:24,900 --> 00:42:27,420
These are my people, they know me, they see me,

1094
00:42:27,420 --> 00:42:29,980
they love me, they buy everything from me,

1095
00:42:29,980 --> 00:42:32,420
they follow me, they got that, these are my people.

1096
00:42:32,420 --> 00:42:34,980
And these are the people that I just trigger the hell out of

1097
00:42:34,980 --> 00:42:36,700
because they are not ready for the evolution

1098
00:42:36,700 --> 00:42:38,140
that I'm going to bring to them.

1099
00:42:38,140 --> 00:42:42,260
And that she knows that she is not for everybody.

1100
00:42:42,260 --> 00:42:45,340
So where in your life are you trying to fit yourself,

1101
00:42:45,340 --> 00:42:47,180
squeeze yourself, play small,

1102
00:42:47,180 --> 00:42:50,820
con-con-conjure yourself to this person that you are not

1103
00:42:50,820 --> 00:42:52,820
because that's not your tribe?

1104
00:42:54,260 --> 00:42:56,740
I would say those two are enough to start with.

1105
00:42:56,740 --> 00:42:58,060
Yeah, I think that's wonderful.

1106
00:42:58,060 --> 00:43:00,540
And again, a lot of, it's inspiring to a lot of women here

1107
00:43:00,540 --> 00:43:02,420
because I think a lot of those messages

1108
00:43:02,420 --> 00:43:06,060
are accessible for men at any point in their lives.

1109
00:43:06,060 --> 00:43:07,700
And we don't get them as often

1110
00:43:07,700 --> 00:43:09,580
because it's really helpful that you said it.

1111
00:43:09,580 --> 00:43:11,540
Well, so that, you know, that details beautifully

1112
00:43:11,540 --> 00:43:13,660
with our final question that we ask every guest.

1113
00:43:13,660 --> 00:43:16,460
And I love asking you because you are 42

1114
00:43:16,460 --> 00:43:18,940
and so you're in the 40s right now.

1115
00:43:18,940 --> 00:43:22,500
What can you offer as a 40s formula to our listeners?

1116
00:43:22,500 --> 00:43:25,700
What are the components, the mathematical equation

1117
00:43:25,700 --> 00:43:28,340
for thriving being successful, you know,

1118
00:43:28,340 --> 00:43:30,860
at the expense of using that word, in this decade?

1119
00:43:30,860 --> 00:43:32,700
What do you perceive?

1120
00:43:32,700 --> 00:43:34,460
I think what I want to share when I hear that,

1121
00:43:34,460 --> 00:43:35,460
and I love that, thank you,

1122
00:43:35,460 --> 00:43:36,780
I didn't think about that question.

1123
00:43:36,780 --> 00:43:37,620
I'm glad I didn't.

1124
00:43:37,620 --> 00:43:38,460
Yeah.

1125
00:43:38,460 --> 00:43:41,260
Because then you just get the raw, pure, unfiltered download.

1126
00:43:43,020 --> 00:43:47,340
Obviously, I use energy as a measurement for success.

1127
00:43:47,340 --> 00:43:50,140
And as I teach everyone that's in my world

1128
00:43:50,140 --> 00:43:52,500
that energy is your most valuable currency,

1129
00:43:52,500 --> 00:43:54,580
you're not getting paid for the job you do.

1130
00:43:54,580 --> 00:43:56,020
You're getting paid for the energy you do it.

1131
00:43:56,020 --> 00:43:57,940
So please preserve this like you would do,

1132
00:43:57,940 --> 00:43:59,620
your most precious thing.

1133
00:43:59,620 --> 00:44:03,660
So I want everybody to know these teachings around energy,

1134
00:44:03,660 --> 00:44:06,780
there are four layers of your energetic body.

1135
00:44:06,780 --> 00:44:09,380
There's the physical energetic field,

1136
00:44:09,380 --> 00:44:10,660
and that's what you people see

1137
00:44:10,660 --> 00:44:12,260
when they see your physical body.

1138
00:44:12,260 --> 00:44:14,500
Yes, so how you look, all of that.

1139
00:44:14,500 --> 00:44:16,140
When you diet, when you exercise,

1140
00:44:16,140 --> 00:44:17,740
that's what most people are doing,

1141
00:44:17,740 --> 00:44:20,220
but you're only working on your physical body over there.

1142
00:44:20,220 --> 00:44:21,860
Don't stop there.

1143
00:44:21,860 --> 00:44:24,620
Don't stop with that first energetic layer,

1144
00:44:24,620 --> 00:44:26,380
the physical body, because there's so much more,

1145
00:44:26,380 --> 00:44:27,580
and there are three more.

1146
00:44:27,580 --> 00:44:28,420
Three.

1147
00:44:28,420 --> 00:44:33,420
And the second layer is your emotional body,

1148
00:44:33,460 --> 00:44:36,100
your emotional fear, energetic field.

1149
00:44:36,100 --> 00:44:38,220
I can't feel your frustration.

1150
00:44:38,220 --> 00:44:39,620
I can't feel your anger.

1151
00:44:39,620 --> 00:44:41,620
Now I can measure it with technology, thankfully.

1152
00:44:41,620 --> 00:44:43,260
I can measure it.

1153
00:44:43,260 --> 00:44:44,100
Yeah, yeah, yeah.

1154
00:44:44,100 --> 00:44:45,340
I'm like, I can't go off on my heat lead.

1155
00:44:45,340 --> 00:44:48,020
I'm gonna measure your energy there.

1156
00:44:48,020 --> 00:44:50,900
So, but you can feel that.

1157
00:44:50,900 --> 00:44:54,140
And so when you feel this energetic body,

1158
00:44:54,140 --> 00:44:55,620
this emotion, which is energy

1159
00:44:55,620 --> 00:44:57,300
that's moving through your body,

1160
00:44:58,220 --> 00:44:59,820
have a relationship with it.

1161
00:44:59,820 --> 00:45:01,260
What do you feel in this moment?

1162
00:45:01,260 --> 00:45:03,340
What is those feelings telling you?

1163
00:45:03,340 --> 00:45:06,260
So if those feelings are high energy frequencies,

1164
00:45:06,260 --> 00:45:09,260
which we can measure them, that's things like joy,

1165
00:45:09,260 --> 00:45:12,820
excitement, enlightenment, peace, harmony, great.

1166
00:45:12,820 --> 00:45:14,220
But if you're constantly experiencing

1167
00:45:14,220 --> 00:45:15,820
these lower frequencies like frustration,

1168
00:45:15,820 --> 00:45:17,380
which is on the energy frequency chart

1169
00:45:17,380 --> 00:45:18,420
that's somewhere in the middle,

1170
00:45:18,420 --> 00:45:22,420
or even worse, the lower frequencies like anger and fear,

1171
00:45:22,420 --> 00:45:23,820
these lower frequencies,

1172
00:45:23,820 --> 00:45:25,980
fear is also a primal instinct as well as an emotion.

1173
00:45:25,980 --> 00:45:29,340
But that's a signal for you to make change,

1174
00:45:29,340 --> 00:45:31,740
because if you're in these lower frequencies all the time,

1175
00:45:31,740 --> 00:45:33,820
it's signaling that there's something that you need

1176
00:45:33,820 --> 00:45:36,340
to bring you back into those high frequencies of joy.

1177
00:45:36,340 --> 00:45:39,700
Then we have the mental field, the mental energy field.

1178
00:45:39,700 --> 00:45:42,460
And I can't feel your anxiety,

1179
00:45:42,460 --> 00:45:44,180
but you can experience it, right?

1180
00:45:44,180 --> 00:45:46,860
Anxiety to me is your mind is in the future,

1181
00:45:46,860 --> 00:45:48,100
depression is in the past,

1182
00:45:48,100 --> 00:45:49,860
but you need to be in the present moment.

1183
00:45:49,860 --> 00:45:51,340
So where are you going in the future

1184
00:45:51,340 --> 00:45:53,940
that's not bringing you back to this present moment?

1185
00:45:53,940 --> 00:45:58,340
And that ruminating that so many of my clients do

1186
00:45:58,340 --> 00:46:00,860
where they come to me and they're all in their head,

1187
00:46:00,860 --> 00:46:02,540
ruminating thought after thought.

1188
00:46:02,540 --> 00:46:04,380
Even just you thinking about what I'm saying now,

1189
00:46:04,380 --> 00:46:06,740
that ruminating over that, I can't feel that,

1190
00:46:06,740 --> 00:46:07,780
but you know it.

1191
00:46:07,780 --> 00:46:12,540
But where do you need to create space in that mental field

1192
00:46:12,540 --> 00:46:16,300
so that new thoughts and ideas are so much purer

1193
00:46:16,300 --> 00:46:18,180
than what's in your existing encyclopedia

1194
00:46:18,180 --> 00:46:20,260
that's in the software that you've been given,

1195
00:46:20,260 --> 00:46:22,260
that these pure thoughts could come to you

1196
00:46:22,260 --> 00:46:24,460
because they're the ones that are personalized for you.

1197
00:46:24,460 --> 00:46:29,140
And the last field is what I call the collective field.

1198
00:46:29,140 --> 00:46:31,780
In quantum physics, we call this the information field.

1199
00:46:31,780 --> 00:46:33,900
In the spiritual world, they call it the aura.

1200
00:46:33,900 --> 00:46:35,660
You know when you walk into a room that,

1201
00:46:35,660 --> 00:46:37,860
in the alphas know this, when they walk into a room,

1202
00:46:37,860 --> 00:46:39,500
there's a presence that they have

1203
00:46:39,500 --> 00:46:41,180
that they give to others, right?

1204
00:46:41,180 --> 00:46:42,260
That's their aura.

1205
00:46:42,260 --> 00:46:43,980
That I call this collective field.

1206
00:46:43,980 --> 00:46:46,060
It's the field that you and I are exchanging

1207
00:46:46,060 --> 00:46:48,100
being in each other's presence now.

1208
00:46:48,100 --> 00:46:50,140
And it's the field that I wish so many more people

1209
00:46:50,140 --> 00:46:52,100
would just focus on their inner work

1210
00:46:52,100 --> 00:46:55,460
so that their field that they exchange with others

1211
00:46:55,460 --> 00:46:56,620
is a lot more cleaner.

1212
00:46:57,580 --> 00:46:59,100
Right, it's a lot more cleaner.

1213
00:46:59,100 --> 00:47:01,940
We need to clean up our collective fields

1214
00:47:01,940 --> 00:47:04,340
so that when we exchange these energies with each other,

1215
00:47:04,340 --> 00:47:06,060
they're coming from a pure estate

1216
00:47:06,060 --> 00:47:07,900
and we also need to protect ourself.

1217
00:47:07,900 --> 00:47:10,340
So what I say about this last field is

1218
00:47:10,340 --> 00:47:13,300
be mindful of this energetic field,

1219
00:47:13,300 --> 00:47:15,540
this collective field that you have around you.

1220
00:47:15,540 --> 00:47:17,900
When you work on your physical, mental, and emotional,

1221
00:47:17,900 --> 00:47:21,300
a byproduct will be that you will be magnetic

1222
00:47:21,300 --> 00:47:25,180
because that collective field will be so much more purer.

1223
00:47:25,180 --> 00:47:28,380
But notice that that is a field that's protecting

1224
00:47:28,380 --> 00:47:30,660
your physical body, your mental body,

1225
00:47:30,660 --> 00:47:31,820
and your emotional body.

1226
00:47:31,820 --> 00:47:35,820
So be mindful of who you let penetrate that field as well.

1227
00:47:35,820 --> 00:47:36,660
I do love that.

1228
00:47:36,660 --> 00:47:40,260
And you're talking about that is really strange

1229
00:47:40,260 --> 00:47:42,140
because I always say that I feel like Amanda

1230
00:47:42,140 --> 00:47:43,500
has just got this energy.

1231
00:47:43,500 --> 00:47:46,060
Like, you know, like it's just, you radiate,

1232
00:47:46,060 --> 00:47:47,780
you radiate this energy which I love.

1233
00:47:47,780 --> 00:47:50,100
So, you know, you can see it, you can feel it,

1234
00:47:50,100 --> 00:47:51,460
you can feel other people's energies.

1235
00:47:51,460 --> 00:47:52,300
And I think it's great.

1236
00:47:52,300 --> 00:47:53,140
That's it.

1237
00:47:53,140 --> 00:47:54,420
And when you speak to her without,

1238
00:47:54,420 --> 00:47:56,940
I know when I speak to a woman or a guy

1239
00:47:56,940 --> 00:47:58,300
without even speaking to them,

1240
00:47:58,300 --> 00:48:00,420
I know whether they're working on their physical body,

1241
00:48:00,420 --> 00:48:03,500
their and their mental and emotional body,

1242
00:48:03,500 --> 00:48:06,020
because I know it by just looking at their collective field.

1243
00:48:06,020 --> 00:48:06,860
Yeah.

1244
00:48:06,860 --> 00:48:07,700
I love that.

1245
00:48:07,700 --> 00:48:09,140
And we definitely know your record.

1246
00:48:09,140 --> 00:48:10,300
I'll say thanks for the kind of notes

1247
00:48:10,300 --> 00:48:12,180
on the collective field, I'll tell you guys.

1248
00:48:12,180 --> 00:48:15,460
But really, this conversation has been amazing.

1249
00:48:15,460 --> 00:48:16,700
Revolutionary, truly.

1250
00:48:16,700 --> 00:48:18,260
Like nothing we've ever had on the show.

1251
00:48:18,260 --> 00:48:20,380
And I so thank you for bringing that point of view.

1252
00:48:20,380 --> 00:48:21,900
We'll watch the space and come back.

1253
00:48:21,900 --> 00:48:22,740
Yeah, exactly.

1254
00:48:22,740 --> 00:48:23,860
Watch the space and what's next.

1255
00:48:23,860 --> 00:48:26,020
And after the show notes, we'll tag on there as well.

1256
00:48:26,020 --> 00:48:27,420
But thank you for being here, T.V.

1257
00:48:27,420 --> 00:48:28,500
We hope to see you back again.

1258
00:48:28,500 --> 00:48:29,500
Oh, thank you, Bentley.

1259
00:48:29,500 --> 00:48:30,340
Thank you.

1260
00:48:30,340 --> 00:48:31,180
We're so excited.

1261
00:48:31,180 --> 00:48:32,020
Thank you.

1262
00:48:32,020 --> 00:48:32,860
Thank you.

1263
00:48:32,860 --> 00:48:34,540
Want more from the 40s Formula?

1264
00:48:34,540 --> 00:48:35,860
Every Friday, we'll be sending our

1265
00:48:35,860 --> 00:48:38,540
Four Play Friday newsletter direct to your inbox

1266
00:48:38,540 --> 00:48:40,860
with four hot topics, tips and trends

1267
00:48:40,860 --> 00:48:43,260
personally curated by Jasmine and Amanda.

1268
00:48:43,260 --> 00:48:46,380
All you need to do is visit the40sformula.com

1269
00:48:46,380 --> 00:48:47,940
and sign up with your email address.

1270
00:48:47,940 --> 00:48:52,940
That's the F-O-R-T-I-E-S formula.com.

1271
00:48:54,340 --> 00:48:56,220
This is Paul, our editor.

1272
00:48:56,220 --> 00:48:59,220
He's a 25 year old unmarried Singaporean guy

1273
00:48:59,220 --> 00:49:01,460
listening to the ramblings of 12 older women

1274
00:49:01,460 --> 00:49:05,020
on everything from menopause to weightlifting to sex.

1275
00:49:05,020 --> 00:49:08,500
So Paul, what's your thoughts on today's conversation?

1276
00:49:08,500 --> 00:49:12,140
Alpha, beta, sigma and other types.

1277
00:49:12,140 --> 00:49:15,100
So, I mean, obviously I'm definitely not an alpha

1278
00:49:15,100 --> 00:49:17,620
nor do I kind of decide to be one

1279
00:49:17,620 --> 00:49:20,700
because it's just not who I am, I guess.

1280
00:49:20,700 --> 00:49:23,820
I'm just probably a chill beta hanging in the corner

1281
00:49:23,820 --> 00:49:26,020
editing this podcast essentially

1282
00:49:26,020 --> 00:49:30,500
and enjoying a peaceful life of humility, I guess.

1283
00:49:30,500 --> 00:49:31,900
So, yeah.

1284
00:49:34,380 --> 00:49:35,940
Guys, you know how much we love coffee.

1285
00:49:35,940 --> 00:49:37,220
And if you want to show us some love,

1286
00:49:37,220 --> 00:49:38,380
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1287
00:49:38,380 --> 00:49:43,060
Just visit buymeacoffee.com slash the40sformula.

1288
00:49:43,060 --> 00:49:43,900
Cheers.

1289
00:49:45,620 --> 00:49:48,380
Before we go, please remember to hit subscribe

1290
00:49:48,380 --> 00:49:50,660
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1291
00:49:50,660 --> 00:49:53,900
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1292
00:49:53,900 --> 00:49:55,860
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1293
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1294
00:49:58,580 --> 00:49:59,660
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1295
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1296
00:50:01,820 --> 00:50:04,100
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1297
00:50:04,100 --> 00:50:08,820
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1298
00:50:08,820 --> 00:50:10,660
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1299
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1300
00:50:12,340 --> 00:50:15,060
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1301
00:50:15,060 --> 00:50:16,580
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1302
00:50:16,580 --> 00:50:18,380
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1303
00:50:18,380 --> 00:50:19,380
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1304
00:50:19,380 --> 00:50:22,580
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1305
00:50:22,580 --> 00:50:27,580
Bye.

1306
00:50:52,580 --> 00:50:57,580
Yeah.

1307
00:51:11,580 --> 00:51:12,420
Right.

1308
00:51:12,420 --> 00:51:13,740
And clinic lighting is not great either.

1309
00:51:13,740 --> 00:51:14,980
It's just super bright for us.

1310
00:51:14,980 --> 00:51:15,820
Yeah.

1311
00:51:15,820 --> 00:51:17,820
So it's like, oh, it's never gonna be like warm and cozy.

1312
00:51:17,820 --> 00:51:18,660
Yeah.

1313
00:51:18,660 --> 00:51:19,500
Beautiful.

1314
00:51:19,500 --> 00:51:20,340
That one that makes you look a bit flawless.

1315
00:51:20,340 --> 00:51:21,180
Yeah.

1316
00:51:21,180 --> 00:51:22,980
That was that this lighting, okay.

1317
00:51:22,980 --> 00:51:23,820
All good.

1318
00:51:23,820 --> 00:51:24,660
It'll work us all out.

1319
00:51:24,660 --> 00:51:25,860
Well, they're talking about flawless.

1320
00:51:25,860 --> 00:51:29,140
I have to say when I was looking at the courses episode,

1321
00:51:29,140 --> 00:51:29,980
what's that?

1322
00:51:29,980 --> 00:51:31,300
God damn, my skin looks so good.

1323
00:51:31,300 --> 00:51:32,140
I love that.

1324
00:51:32,140 --> 00:51:34,060
I love that.

1325
00:51:34,060 --> 00:51:35,420
Yeah, that was a good lighting day.

1326
00:51:35,420 --> 00:51:36,260
Yeah, it must have been.

1327
00:51:36,260 --> 00:51:38,460
I am a bit leggy today, so tell me that.

1328
00:51:38,460 --> 00:51:39,300
A bit leggy.

1329
00:51:39,300 --> 00:51:41,260
I don't know why I'm so leggy.

1330
00:51:41,260 --> 00:51:42,780
I didn't even think about what to wear for this.

1331
00:51:42,780 --> 00:51:43,860
I was thinking about my whole day

1332
00:51:43,860 --> 00:51:48,860
and I'm really not out.