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Hello and welcome to the 40s Formula, your go-to place for insightful discussions on

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navigating your 40s and thriving in this transformative decade.

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We're your hosts, Amanda and Jasmine, two women that are passionate about exploring

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the challenges and adventures that come with turning 40 and what lies ahead.

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Today we're talking with Pari Priyadarshini, owner of The Lab Fitness.

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Pari is a strength coach and athlete who believes in training for longevity.

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She is a wife and a mom, an entrepreneur and a career consultant.

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She is also the owner of local Singapore fitness centre, The Lab Fitness, a safe space for

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women to learn and understand strength training and its benefits without any judgment.

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She has dedicated her business and her very popular social media platform to the idea

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that even one woman might make the life-altering decision to start training and lifting weights

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because of her mission and her message.

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I am so happy today to be joined by a fellow muscle mama and a fellow strength coach, Pari

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Priyadarshini.

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She is here today to talk to us about all things strength, muscle, menopause, thriving

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in your 40s, all the topics that I am of course hot to trot about.

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So thank you so much for joining us.

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Thank you, Amanda.

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Thank you, Jasmine, for having me here.

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And first of all, before I start everything, I want to say this is such a noble cause you

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guys are doing.

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It is an amazing thing to do and I wish you all the best.

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And no matter what happens out of it, I think I'm just kudos to you guys.

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Thank you for taking this path.

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We are so happy, like I said, to be on this journey with you.

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And what blows my mind about your specific journey, Pari, is that five years ago, 2018,

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you had never been inside a gym.

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And now you are sitting across from me.

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You are jacked.

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Okay.

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I wish everyone could see these arms that are across from me from the table right now.

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It's like outrageous.

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And you're running your own studio.

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So it's not just like you're looking fine, you're walking the talk.

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You're actually empowering other women to do it.

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I need to know how that came about in 12 years.

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Thank you so much, guys.

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I mean, yeah, I feel like that was a whole different time for me.

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So 2018 was, let me kind of remind myself who I was.

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So I was getting quite, I was getting promoted quite a lot over like a few years and there

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was a lot of business restructure that's going on.

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Back then I had a job and yeah.

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Good to know.

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And so yeah, there was a, I kind of got the advantage of some of the restructures and

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I got promoted.

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And that meant I was on flights a lot.

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Like I was literally flying over and what started with like Jakarta and Hong Kong and

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Bangkok soon became like Minneapolis and London and people don't know it, but I hate flying.

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I am super scared of it.

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And every time I was on a flight, I think about the takeoff and the landing and the

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turbulences and I was super scared the whole time.

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So I would literally have to like drink champagne and listen to music to like, you know, kind

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of take care of myself during the time.

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So there was a lot of stress and on top of that, of course, with the job and everything,

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I was carrying a lot of that stress load on me.

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And at that point, my son was around five, six years old and I had to like leave him

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home and go and I would carry that guilt with me all the time.

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And I, and I remember like that phase as being the Tomica phase.

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So he was into cars and I, what I would do is I would take all the currency that was

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left from that country and at the airport, I would buy the Tomica cars and I'll fit

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it in the bag.

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And I would come home with like a bag full of cars and a heart full of guilt.

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And that was a phase that probably one day I just woke up and I was like, is this it?

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Is this what is there to life and is this all it is?

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And I truly wanted to find something else and kind of a meaning, you know, and that

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is the time when I was to run around the block, just a bit of cardio and there isn't any

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time fitness that is right next to where I stay.

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And there was this like, I can't explain this, like a universe is telling me like, just walk

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in, just go in.

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And I felt it for quite a few months.

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And one day I was like, okay, there is a red light right in front of me.

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I'm stopping here.

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Just take it, just go for it.

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And I took the steps in and that was it.

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That was it.

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How did you feel like when you walk through that door, do you remember the emotions that

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were going through you like when you walked in to Anytime Fitness?

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Oh, wow.

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Okay.

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So there were two emotions.

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One was fear and the other was curiosity.

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And I was just lucky that my curiosity was just a little bit more than my fear.

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And that is the reason why I could walk in.

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So I was like, I'm going to look like an idiot.

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Yep.

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And I think that's such, I think that's a sentiment that is shared by so many women

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that have either never been inside a gym or have never walked onto the strength floor of

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the gym, right?

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They're in the cardio zone and that's where they feel comfortable.

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But they see the barbell, they hear the dumbbells clanging against that rack and they're like,

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no, not for me.

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How did you let that kind of curiosity outweigh your fear?

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I think there was a part of me that, like I said, it felt like there was something missing

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inside me.

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And to me, at that point, I don't think I was educated enough to know a lot more about

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strength training, but seeing the gym in front of me and always seeing people go in and out,

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and there was just some part of me that was always like thinking, you know, what is it

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about?

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And so that is the reason why I walked in.

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It was not like how I was educated about it or anyone was telling anything about it.

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It was just a feeling, to be honest.

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I can't explain more than that.

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Yeah.

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And did you have a trainer that kind of showed you the ropes?

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Yes.

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Okay.

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Yeah.

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So I started off by having a coach for a few years.

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And at that point, I remember the first time I touched the barbell, it literally like changed

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my life.

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So it was a commitment that I made, which I think I was just all in.

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And so at that point, I started not just having a coach, but also starting to hang out a lot

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with athletes.

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So I made friends and I started kind of getting introduced to people who were probably at

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that point, I was hanging out with bodybuilders a lot.

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And then also people who were doing some endurance training, like they're going for marathons.

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So I used to hang out with the community.

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And most of my education didn't just come from the training at the gym, but also from

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like spending time and listening to people who are athletes, who were probably competing

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somewhere or training a certain regimen.

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And I just started kind of absorbing all of that.

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You fell in with the bad kids.

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I did.

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But it's true.

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I mean, part of something that you and I have talked about a lot personally is the especially

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here in Asia, the perception of women lifting weights.

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And you said, for example, you know, you were hanging with bodybuilders and you touched

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a barbell.

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These are things that are not shared experiences for women worldwide, but particularly in Asia.

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How did you start to feel comfortable with the idea that to build strength, you would

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have to build a physical body that maybe was a bit bigger, a bit stronger, a bit less typical

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by Asian female body standards?

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You Amanda, you hit it right on the spot.

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I think that is a reason why a lot of us don't go for strength training.

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Right.

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So when I used to work, I had a bunch of girls who wears the so-called skinny bitches.

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Can I say that on air?

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You can.

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And it's a stereotypical kind of thing.

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Right.

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So you have this it's quite common, especially in Asia.

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When I started going for strength training, my body began to change.

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And luckily, I did get that kind of stimulus.

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I was training really hard at that point.

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I started getting a stimulus.

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And you should see the number of friends or colleagues who started commenting about it.

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And I did see a bit of some of my friends literally stopped like hanging out with me.

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So it is a bit of a taboo and you're right about it.

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So at that point for me, I did not ever go into training with an aesthetic mindset.

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I didn't think of how my body would condition itself.

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And I'm being very honest about it.

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Like how I look today is not a reflection of what I wanted it to look.

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It is just an outcome of what I wanted to feel.

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And that is what I focused on.

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I never thought about how I looked because I came from probably a place where I was slightly

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underweight to be honest.

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I had an issue with fat loss or whatever.

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But I just loved the way I felt.

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I love that.

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I feel like a lot of people will be like, I'm going to the gym because I want to look

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a certain way.

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I need to lose weight, which tends to be sort of the key point.

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They don't even say, I want to lose fat.

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It's always I want to lose weight.

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And then I think they might start working out a little bit.

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And obviously, they start gaining weight because they're gaining muscle.

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And it's like, oh, no, don't want to do this anymore.

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I better sort of scale back.

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Go back to going on the treadmill.

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Was there ever a point in your life where you were like, hmm, do I want to be this way?

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Or was it always just like?

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Jasmine, I'm not going to lie about this.

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Yeah.

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Yes.

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There were moments.

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So there was a point of time where and I have a very long relationship with my husband.

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It's been forever.

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I met him when I was like 18 years old.

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And he's seen me a certain way.

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Yeah, over the period of time that we kind of studied and we kind of got married, got

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jobs, whatever it is.

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And then I started strength training.

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I never had looked like that before.

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And like I said, it's not just the taboo around friends and community, but also around my

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own family, you know?

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And so these like offhanded comments around how my clothes fit differently on my back

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looks different.

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It kind of got to me at a certain point.

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And it did.

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But then I would have to tell myself, this is something that means more to me than how

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I look.

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And there was this one part of me that was like, do not look at, do not think about how

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you're looking.

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Think about how much you are learning at the gym.

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And I would love to talk about that.

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You know, like the kind of things that you learn at the gym is so much more than just

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strength training.

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Right?

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And so that's what I focused on.

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And then there was this like slow validation that happened in social media or with my friends.

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And they saw that turnaround curve.

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When you see how your clothes fit around the curves and you get more curvy.

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I never had a booty and I got a booty.

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And my shoulders look broad.

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So the overall shapes look a bit more hourglass.

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And I think that validation started happening over a period of time.

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And so that was my like, all right, I think it's gaining more traction.

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I remember there was this lady that I know, she posted on Instagram, like three different

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types of pictures.

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I think one was like a skinny girl.

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Another one was probably sort of in between.

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And then there was like a Beyonce, you know, and she was just asking what kind of body

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shape do you like?

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And for me, I remember looking at the pictures and I think it was like a mix between the

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Beyonce and the person who was really sort of cut.

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And I was like, that's what I want to go for.

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I don't want the body where you're born with it, that sort of skinny looking body.

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I want the body where people are like, fuck, she works.

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Yeah.

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Well, it's so funny that you said in the beginning when you were starting to put on a bit more

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muscle density and have more visible shoulders and glutes and stuff like that, that you were

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getting negative remarks.

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Because from where I'm standing, right, a few things, right.

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First of all, I'm looking at you with my very American Western lens.

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And when I see you, you are so petite and so small.

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I would never think of this as someone who has gotten big from strength training, right.

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So that's the first kind of diversion between me and what might be typical here.

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And secondly is my husband and I run the Lyft Clinic together, right.

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So we have a medical mindset about longevity and strength training.

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So when I hear that you used to be more skinny and more petite, less muscle mass, and this

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is where you've gotten to now, all I can think is, man, what an amazing transition for her

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health she has made.

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I could never think about a negative outcome because what you've done is transitioned from

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a body that was less well to one that is more well and can really give you kind of longevity

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benefits.

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And I know that that's something that you truly believe in, training for longevity.

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Can you tell me what training for longevity looks like in terms of how you train and how

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you train your clients?

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Yeah, I would love to.

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It's not a common concept, by the way.

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I mean, Asia, let's not even talk about Asia in general globally.

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It is a concept that is not really, I think it's just about a decade or so that it's become

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more mainstream and there is more scientific kind of journals.

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Scientists are talking about it.

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Researchers are talking about it.

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So it's something that is still kind of like in a box.

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And how does it, how does it different, let me give you an example, okay.

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So when I started hanging out with my badass athletes, you know, the ones that were bodybuilders

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and they were competing for something.

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And then there were these endurance athletes who were training for marathons and they would

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look at me and they would ask me, so what are you competing for?

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You know, you have that figure, you know, you're petite and you can truly build the

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kind of bodybuilder, bikini model kind of a thing.

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You could totally go for that.

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And then I would say, no, I'm okay.

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You know, I like, I like to train.

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I like how it feels.

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And they would say, oh, it's called training for the sake of training.

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And that's what I lived with for a while.

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I didn't know how to explain it, but then now that there are enough information around training

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for longevity, I do have an answer.

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So let me just tell you, like, give you a bit of a understanding of what it means.

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So training for longevity means that the variables that you measure are different.

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So your, your measuring is basically, I'll give you two variables, which are the most

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common if you look at it in the research.

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So one is the lifespan.

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This is a total number of years you're going to live on this earth.

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And then you have the health span, which is the total number of years you'll function

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as an independent, healthy human being.

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So training for longevity is essentially taking the health span and extending it to as much

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as you can for your lifespan.

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So then what does it mean is you would look at those last years, the last decade of your

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life, and then you would kind of try to gauge what are the things that you want to do?

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What are the movements that you would want to do?

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For example, I would like to run to a bus or walk for a bus.

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I would like to be able to play with my grandkids, you know, I'd be able to pick my groceries.

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And those are the things you want to do in your last decade.

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So you'll take those variables, and you'll just bring them to the gym in a conditioned

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environment and you train around those.

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So there'll be two parts to it.

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The one part will be the structural muscular skeletal part, which is essentially looking

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at the structure.

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So your basic movement patterns, for example, the knee dominant, which is a squat when you

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go to the bathroom.

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We all need that to the very end.

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Our hip dominant is like a hinge when you're picking up stuff from the floor, or your upper

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body movements like a vertical push or a pull when you're picking stuff out of or putting

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cabin baggage in.

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Right?

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Yeah.

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Or you still want to go on those holidays.

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Yeah, exactly.

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So you would have the holidays and then you would have the horizontal push pull, which

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is opening and closing doors or things like rotational movements and also things like

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carry like carrying your cold storage groceries.

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Right?

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So those are the movements.

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If you want to do, you would incorporate those movements in your structural strength training

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right now.

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And then the other part is, which is on your cardiovascular.

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So your heart, your lung health, your mitochondrial health, and all of that is taken care of with

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a regimen that includes some form of aerobic training, endurance training, which is in

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scientific terms, if you can keep up to around 20, 25 minutes of slightly elevated heart

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rate where let's say the two of you are going for a run together, you can talk to each other.

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Yeah, happens all the time.

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Exactly.

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You don't catch me running.

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That is an aerobic training.

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And then you have the anaerobic training, which is where you take sprints.

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You go speed work and then you're doing 30 seconds of all out work and you're taking,

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let's say, a 60 to 90 second of rest.

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Between those two broadly, the structural, muscular, skeletal part and the cardiovascular

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part is where you'll focus on if you're looking at training for longevity.

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Yeah.

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And I think that resonates so well with us as scientists and of course with us as women

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in our 40s, right?

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Because that's something that we want.

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We want to play with our grandchildren.

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We want to travel and put our bags overhead.

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What I would ask is a little bit more challenging in terms of speaking to women who just haven't

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arrived at that mindset yet, meaning they're still training to look hot.

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Let's be real, right?

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They're training for aesthetics.

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They have not yet made the jump to training for longevity.

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How do you convince women?

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And I think it's important that I think in your 40s is when you are still negotiating

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those two identities.

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You are still wanting to look aesthetically good in your 40s and you are wanting to start

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thinking about longevity.

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How do you kind of nudge women toward that longevity transition with their training?

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And a lot of times that means more strength training.

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Yeah.

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Having podcasts like these.

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Yeah.

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Darn right.

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I think it's a dissociation of...

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So I have to come back to so many conversations that I've had with clients that come to the

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gym and they would say things like, hey, Pari, I really want to lose some weight.

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I want to, of course, be strong, but I don't want to look like you.

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What?

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I think you look incredible.

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Incredible.

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Incredible.

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I wish you all could be in the studio.

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I don't want any shoulders.

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Oh my God.

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I feel like those...

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I feel like it gives...

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Like you said, it gives you that shape.

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Oh, Jasmeen.

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You're a 1%.

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Oh, man.

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Yeah.

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Fair enough.

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And that is the presumption.

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First of all, it is, of course, the whole conditioning that we have as women and that

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is essentially Asian women more so, but stay petite.

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Style yourself.

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Make sure that you fit into the size zeros and the size twos.

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Size six is too big.

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And then we do what you have to do to look like a Victoria's Secret model.

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And so that is why we go.

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We want to lose weight.

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We want to look small.

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And of course, we want to have some level of functional strength, but it doesn't...

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You don't have to lift heavy.

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You just have to lift enough.

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And that is kind of like assuming that if you lift heavy, you're actually going to gain

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the muscles that show through your skin.

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Like that is not possible for most of us, especially women.

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We do not have the metabolics.

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We are not conditioned that way to be able to train, just lift heavy every day.

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And you're going to like look jacked and get big muscles.

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We don't have testosterone.

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That level of testosterone doesn't exist in our body.

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And someone like me, I want to look jacked and I have been training.

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I literally train to failure every day.

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I keep my protein levels high every day.

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And even then, I am trying so hard to build some muscle mass.

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Grams.

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Grams of muscle mass.

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Oh my God.

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It is so hard.

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When you think that you'll do a few pushups and you'll get chest muscles.

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It's such a big misconception and that is what we have to break.

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And this is a topic for a whole other podcast, but the only time that I've been able to gain

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significant muscle mass is by training through my pregnancies and using my pregnancy as an

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anabolic period to leverage against my actual muscle mass.

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But we can talk about that another time.

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But it is not an easy journey, gals.

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Let's put it that way, right?

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I was going to say, what would you say to women who are like, oh, I'm 40, I'm fucking

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old.

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Is it too late to start?

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Can they start?

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How would you encourage someone who's in their 40s, never stepped foot in a gym before because

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they either never had to, but just like, oh, I'm past it.

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Oh my God.

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00:20:33,080 --> 00:20:36,600
That is another big misconception, which is essentially it's too late.

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00:20:36,600 --> 00:20:40,360
It is never too late, ever.

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All you're doing is what happens is that if you don't use it, you lose it.

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You'll start using it.

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You'll start gaining it.

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And it doesn't matter when you start at all.

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I think that is something that we are thinking it's too old or it's we're way past it.

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And now it's like too late for us to do something about it.

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It's never too late.

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So that's what I'll tell them.

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And if like there was some other stuff like key tips or advice to somebody who has never

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started strength training or never entered the gym, the first one is that if fear is

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the thing that's holding you, now you're too scared.

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And it's not fear.

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It's like, I'm scared.

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I look like an idiot kind of a fear, right?

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I'm scared I'm looking like I look like an idiot.

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If I go into the gym and I look old and everybody around me just knows stuff and they're younger

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than me, then I just tell them, girl, there are enough idiots in the gym.

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Don't you worry.

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Young and old.

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And they have been training for years, very confidently doing stuff that they have no

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idea about.

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So you'll fit right in when you go there.

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And secondly is that, like I said, curiosity, right?

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Ask questions.

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Like, talk to people.

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Talk to people who are training and don't be scared to go and ask, how does this work?

427
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You know, get a coach.

428
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And that is where you start.

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And it doesn't matter how old you are, you'll get there.

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And the last thing is like, you know, something that I, it comes personally from me, it's

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be prepared to be surprised.

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Everything about you is going to change when you start training.

433
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It doesn't matter which is you go in, but you would get benefits out of you that you

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never thought.

435
00:22:06,960 --> 00:22:09,160
It has nothing to do with strength training.

436
00:22:09,160 --> 00:22:12,840
It's going to translate into your life, in your relationships, in your job, in your day

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to day that you'd never have thought about.

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So be prepared for that.

439
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And I love that.

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I think that really leads into my next question for you, which is that a lot of times fear

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is absolutely something that holds women back from getting in the gym.

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But I think the second most common thing would, or even possibly the most common thing would

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be busyness.

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Women in their forties are at the peak of their careers.

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They're either childbearing a bit later, like myself, or they're having young families in

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their forties.

447
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They're taking care of elderly parents in their forties.

448
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They are so busy.

449
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They're like, you know what?

450
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I can't layer another thing onto this life that I lead.

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And least of all, strength training.

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At least with cardio, they have the idea that they can at least put their shoes on, pop

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out for a run and get it done.

454
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But women are not prioritizing strength training in this decade yet.

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How do you help women fit strength training into a part of their fabric of their lives,

456
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like it is yours?

457
00:23:02,520 --> 00:23:04,600
Yeah, that's the thing, right?

458
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So how do you have time for cardio and you don't have time for strength training?

459
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That blows my mind, girl.

460
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Just a mental block, isn't it?

461
00:23:12,280 --> 00:23:18,280
But yeah, I mean, I would say the conversation I had with me like a few years back when there

462
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was a point in my life when I was in between a job where I was trying to really focus on

463
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the lab, right?

464
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I needed time to build the lab.

465
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And that is the time where I invested everything I had literally into the gym.

466
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And I was like, this is it.

467
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This is my baby.

468
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It's my passion project.

469
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And there were those few months where I had an issue with my business partner.

470
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And then there was a challenge with the real estate itself.

471
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And I went through a lot at that point.

472
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And I was literally kind of jumping through hoops trying to manage everything.

473
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And I sat myself down one day and I told myself, Pari, you would be at the center of your universe,

474
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your biggest priority from now onwards.

475
00:24:01,360 --> 00:24:05,680
And it would not matter what other aspects exist in your life.

476
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Everything else is an extension of who you are.

477
00:24:08,480 --> 00:24:10,600
The lab is an extension of who you are.

478
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Your family is an extension.

479
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You know, a job that you would have would be an extension of who you are.

480
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But that is not you.

481
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So I had to kind of literally tell myself and I journaled it.

482
00:24:21,200 --> 00:24:26,240
I literally wrote it down and I said, from now on, your physical and mental health would

483
00:24:26,240 --> 00:24:28,360
be your biggest priority.

484
00:24:28,360 --> 00:24:30,680
And you'll be the best version of yourself.

485
00:24:30,680 --> 00:24:36,400
And that will, as an extension, make everything else in your life the best version of itself.

486
00:24:36,400 --> 00:24:37,400
I love that.

487
00:24:37,400 --> 00:24:38,400
Yeah.

488
00:24:38,400 --> 00:24:40,440
Putting yourself first and then everything falls into place.

489
00:24:40,440 --> 00:24:41,640
I think women need to hear that.

490
00:24:41,640 --> 00:24:42,640
Definitely.

491
00:24:42,640 --> 00:24:44,160
Because I think you always put everything else first.

492
00:24:44,160 --> 00:24:47,720
You always put your kids first, your husband first, your work first.

493
00:24:47,720 --> 00:24:49,920
And then you're like, oh, if I've got time, I'll go to the gym.

494
00:24:49,920 --> 00:24:54,600
Or if I've got time, I'll get bed early or I'll eat well, whatever it is that you want

495
00:24:54,600 --> 00:24:55,600
to do.

496
00:24:55,600 --> 00:24:56,600
But you never put yourself first.

497
00:24:56,600 --> 00:25:01,680
But if you are the best version of yourself, then you can share that with your family,

498
00:25:01,680 --> 00:25:02,680
with your work.

499
00:25:02,680 --> 00:25:07,200
And I guess be better at what it is that you do.

500
00:25:07,200 --> 00:25:08,200
Yeah.

501
00:25:08,200 --> 00:25:13,200
And the other one that I think all of us kind of fall prey to is the perfection.

502
00:25:13,200 --> 00:25:14,200
Yes.

503
00:25:14,200 --> 00:25:15,200
Right?

504
00:25:15,200 --> 00:25:16,200
Oh, guilty.

505
00:25:16,200 --> 00:25:19,280
We are looking at the perfect time in our calendars, the perfect workout.

506
00:25:19,280 --> 00:25:21,120
We are waiting for that.

507
00:25:21,120 --> 00:25:22,120
It's never going to happen.

508
00:25:22,120 --> 00:25:23,900
Our lives are too busy.

509
00:25:23,900 --> 00:25:25,120
We have too much going on.

510
00:25:25,120 --> 00:25:28,760
So it has to be done is better than perfect.

511
00:25:28,760 --> 00:25:29,760
You just have to get it done.

512
00:25:29,760 --> 00:25:30,800
Oh, girl, preach that mantra.

513
00:25:30,800 --> 00:25:33,680
That is, I think, something we all need to hear over and over again.

514
00:25:33,680 --> 00:25:35,960
Yeah, just get in the gym.

515
00:25:35,960 --> 00:25:36,960
Yes.

516
00:25:36,960 --> 00:25:39,440
You know, hire that first session with the trainer.

517
00:25:39,440 --> 00:25:40,440
Start doing the thing.

518
00:25:40,440 --> 00:25:41,440
Yes.

519
00:25:41,440 --> 00:25:43,880
And you'll magically, you'll find that your life organizes around it.

520
00:25:43,880 --> 00:25:44,880
Exactly.

521
00:25:44,880 --> 00:25:46,820
So it doesn't matter how long you're training.

522
00:25:46,820 --> 00:25:49,600
You have some time, just commit to it.

523
00:25:49,600 --> 00:25:50,600
Get it done.

524
00:25:50,600 --> 00:25:54,040
I think that is where we are kind of waiting for some perfect time for us to happen.

525
00:25:54,040 --> 00:25:56,020
All the variables will fall in place.

526
00:25:56,020 --> 00:25:58,080
It never will.

527
00:25:58,080 --> 00:26:00,800
Have you ever gotten to a point where you're like, what the fuck am I doing?

528
00:26:00,800 --> 00:26:03,400
Like, you know, how did I get here?

529
00:26:03,400 --> 00:26:04,400
Do you ever feel like that?

530
00:26:04,400 --> 00:26:09,760
Or do you always sort of feel good and look forward to your workouts?

531
00:26:09,760 --> 00:26:14,760
We all go through our kind of ups and downs.

532
00:26:14,760 --> 00:26:21,240
And yeah, I mean, do you think that like people like us, we always feel good about everything?

533
00:26:21,240 --> 00:26:26,680
We would definitely go through kind of, you know, the why am I the way I am?

534
00:26:26,680 --> 00:26:27,680
Why am I like this?

535
00:26:27,680 --> 00:26:28,680
Why am I?

536
00:26:28,680 --> 00:26:32,360
Why is this neighborhood, you know, which is my mental makeup, which I have to stay

537
00:26:32,360 --> 00:26:34,200
in the whole time?

538
00:26:34,200 --> 00:26:36,120
Why is it the way it is?

539
00:26:36,120 --> 00:26:40,800
Like, and of course, like every month you have those days in your cycle that you feel

540
00:26:40,800 --> 00:26:42,160
like everything is shit, right?

541
00:26:42,160 --> 00:26:43,420
Nothing's working out.

542
00:26:43,420 --> 00:26:46,880
You know, I could have had a whole different life and I could have lived a different life

543
00:26:46,880 --> 00:26:48,640
and this is not who I supposed to be.

544
00:26:48,640 --> 00:26:49,640
And then, you know, a few days later.

545
00:26:49,640 --> 00:26:52,640
I'm Flo Comptain and he's like, hey, that was just my period.

546
00:26:52,640 --> 00:26:54,640
Am I the queen of my world?

547
00:26:54,640 --> 00:26:56,000
Like, look at me.

548
00:26:56,000 --> 00:26:57,000
Yes.

549
00:26:57,000 --> 00:27:01,160
I love that, again, it still blows my mind that five short years ago, you were, you know,

550
00:27:01,160 --> 00:27:04,840
skinny parry and never had been in a gym and now you're like owning it parry.

551
00:27:04,840 --> 00:27:09,480
I love that you use the word athlete to talk about yourself and to talk about your clients.

552
00:27:09,480 --> 00:27:13,920
I think that that's yet another thing that women are reticent to do in general is to

553
00:27:13,920 --> 00:27:19,440
consider themselves athletes unless they are competing in races, unless they are competing

554
00:27:19,440 --> 00:27:20,960
in bodybuilding and winning trophies.

555
00:27:20,960 --> 00:27:22,240
They're like, OK, I'm not an athlete.

556
00:27:22,240 --> 00:27:24,080
I'm just a person who works out.

557
00:27:24,080 --> 00:27:29,600
How do you encourage your clients to accept and embrace that title of athlete?

558
00:27:29,600 --> 00:27:30,600
Yeah.

559
00:27:30,600 --> 00:27:31,600
You know what?

560
00:27:31,600 --> 00:27:32,600
I actually looked at the dictionary.

561
00:27:32,600 --> 00:27:33,600
Oh, tell me.

562
00:27:33,600 --> 00:27:34,600
Oh, this is fun.

563
00:27:34,600 --> 00:27:35,600
Educate us.

564
00:27:35,600 --> 00:27:38,560
I have to show you and this is something that I think you need to hear what the dictionary

565
00:27:38,560 --> 00:27:40,720
says as an athlete.

566
00:27:40,720 --> 00:27:42,560
Who is defined as an athlete?

567
00:27:42,560 --> 00:27:48,440
A person who is trained or skilled in exercises, sports or games, requiring physical strength,

568
00:27:48,440 --> 00:27:50,440
agility or stamina.

569
00:27:50,440 --> 00:27:55,960
That has nothing to do with competing or winning, getting a medal, standing on a podium.

570
00:27:55,960 --> 00:27:57,720
It is about the skill set.

571
00:27:57,720 --> 00:28:03,400
It's about training towards a certain goal, which could be an exercise or a game or a

572
00:28:03,400 --> 00:28:04,400
sport.

573
00:28:04,400 --> 00:28:08,960
And that is how I feel like there are so many variables to why women and that is what I

574
00:28:08,960 --> 00:28:12,880
talk to my athletes.

575
00:28:12,880 --> 00:28:18,280
My female clients who come to the gym to train is basically what is stopping you from defining

576
00:28:18,280 --> 00:28:19,800
yourself as that person, right?

577
00:28:19,800 --> 00:28:22,400
So of course there are many factors going into it.

578
00:28:22,400 --> 00:28:27,800
One, let me just get that big one, which is I don't see myself as an athlete because I

579
00:28:27,800 --> 00:28:30,400
don't want to look like an athlete.

580
00:28:30,400 --> 00:28:35,520
That's a big one because not every girl goes in there and says, you know what, if an athlete

581
00:28:35,520 --> 00:28:39,240
looks like this and especially they're thinking of the bodybuilders who are on stage, I really

582
00:28:39,240 --> 00:28:41,680
don't want to associate myself with that title.

583
00:28:41,680 --> 00:28:42,680
Let's not get there.

584
00:28:42,680 --> 00:28:47,520
And the second one is there is this perception that an athlete is a full time job.

585
00:28:47,520 --> 00:28:52,240
Like an athlete is somebody who is an athlete and they do that the whole day and that's

586
00:28:52,240 --> 00:28:53,600
not who I am.

587
00:28:53,600 --> 00:28:57,560
So there is this period of time where you really have to start reflecting on, okay,

588
00:28:57,560 --> 00:28:59,960
you can incorporate that definition.

589
00:28:59,960 --> 00:29:04,920
Just like you're a mom, you are an entrepreneur, you're a business owner, you're a career consultant,

590
00:29:04,920 --> 00:29:06,360
you're also an athlete.

591
00:29:06,360 --> 00:29:12,160
And all of these can exist side by side and you do not have to be one in isolation.

592
00:29:12,160 --> 00:29:15,780
And I think the third one is a big one and it's just all of us, all of us women defining

593
00:29:15,780 --> 00:29:20,480
ourselves as whatever we want to define ourselves as and that is the fear of judgment.

594
00:29:20,480 --> 00:29:25,280
Oh, she goes to the gym three times a week and now she calls herself an athlete.

595
00:29:25,280 --> 00:29:29,080
You know, that fear of how people are going to perceive us if we call ourselves that,

596
00:29:29,080 --> 00:29:32,320
out loud and say I'm an athlete, I need to sleep at 10 o'clock.

597
00:29:32,320 --> 00:29:37,720
You know, I don't drink or I have a certain set regimen and I want to follow it because

598
00:29:37,720 --> 00:29:41,840
I do define myself as this person and you're just worried you'll be laughed at.

599
00:29:41,840 --> 00:29:42,840
Yeah.

600
00:29:42,840 --> 00:29:47,320
I think in a lot of ways, Pari, that's where the term athlete becomes kind of an empowering

601
00:29:47,320 --> 00:29:48,320
one.

602
00:29:48,320 --> 00:29:51,640
Because you can say I do need to go to bed at 10 o'clock because I'm an athlete and I

603
00:29:51,640 --> 00:29:56,040
do need to, you know, eat this protein shake after I work out because I'm an athlete.

604
00:29:56,040 --> 00:30:01,600
I think it almost gives you license to do cool shit, you know, and to take care of yourself

605
00:30:01,600 --> 00:30:02,960
in kind of a more elevated way.

606
00:30:02,960 --> 00:30:08,180
I love that term and I love using it in a way that, you know, justifies the habits that

607
00:30:08,180 --> 00:30:09,680
make you a better person.

608
00:30:09,680 --> 00:30:12,680
Babe, I mean, just think of it this way, right?

609
00:30:12,680 --> 00:30:19,480
I mean, here, all of us, we do live the lifestyle that is required for us to train at a certain

610
00:30:19,480 --> 00:30:22,400
level and we take care of us that way.

611
00:30:22,400 --> 00:30:26,280
If I'm going in the morning, I'm doing a 10K in the morning and I come to the gym and I'm

612
00:30:26,280 --> 00:30:31,960
lifting two times my body weight, that means I have put in the time and the effort and

613
00:30:31,960 --> 00:30:34,480
the mindset that it takes for me to get there.

614
00:30:34,480 --> 00:30:36,800
And I'm not saying that I have to lift that heavy at all.

615
00:30:36,800 --> 00:30:40,800
I'm saying it's the mindset that matters more than anything else.

616
00:30:40,800 --> 00:30:45,440
And the thing is that if I do not define myself, all of us, any one of us, if we don't define

617
00:30:45,440 --> 00:30:50,240
ourselves as a certain way, in a certain way, you will never act that way.

618
00:30:50,240 --> 00:30:51,440
And that's scary.

619
00:30:51,440 --> 00:30:53,320
So it's good for us to say, okay, I'm an athlete.

620
00:30:53,320 --> 00:30:55,960
Now it means I'm going to behave like that.

621
00:30:55,960 --> 00:30:58,400
And that's going to translate into my day to day behavior.

622
00:30:58,400 --> 00:31:03,680
So earlier you mentioned that you try to get your protein in.

623
00:31:03,680 --> 00:31:05,000
How much protein are you taking in?

624
00:31:05,000 --> 00:31:09,840
And what would you say to somebody that says, oh, I don't like meat or I don't, I don't,

625
00:31:09,840 --> 00:31:13,520
you know, I can't eat that much protein is too much.

626
00:31:13,520 --> 00:31:14,520
That's always something.

627
00:31:14,520 --> 00:31:19,800
Oh, if I had a dollar for every time.

628
00:31:19,800 --> 00:31:24,040
Oh, you haven't hacked it yet.

629
00:31:24,040 --> 00:31:30,040
I think we, there is a period of time that I invested in just educating myself on nutrition

630
00:31:30,040 --> 00:31:32,640
to such a large extent.

631
00:31:32,640 --> 00:31:34,540
Like that was the phase I would call myself.

632
00:31:34,540 --> 00:31:36,720
And by the way, to answer your question, you would be surprised.

633
00:31:36,720 --> 00:31:41,400
I'm at least at 2.4 to 2.5 times of my body weight in grams.

634
00:31:41,400 --> 00:31:42,400
Wow.

635
00:31:42,400 --> 00:31:43,400
Gram per kg.

636
00:31:43,400 --> 00:31:44,400
You are amazing.

637
00:31:44,400 --> 00:31:45,400
You are kicking my butt, girl.

638
00:31:45,400 --> 00:31:46,400
I'm just thinking that.

639
00:31:46,400 --> 00:31:47,400
I was like, ah, I can't eat.

640
00:31:47,400 --> 00:31:48,400
Everything.

641
00:31:48,400 --> 00:31:49,400
Yeah.

642
00:31:49,400 --> 00:31:50,400
I'm at 2.2 on my best day.

643
00:31:50,400 --> 00:31:51,400
So that's amazing.

644
00:31:51,400 --> 00:31:52,400
That's great too.

645
00:31:52,400 --> 00:31:57,640
I mean, we are at least at that level where we will be able to get that, the hormone rush.

646
00:31:57,640 --> 00:32:02,180
So I think there was a period of time where I just went into my fitness pal and I would

647
00:32:02,180 --> 00:32:06,160
go into the grocery store and I just literally read labels.

648
00:32:06,160 --> 00:32:07,160
You know?

649
00:32:07,160 --> 00:32:10,520
And that is a period of time that all of us need to go through and just try to understand.

650
00:32:10,520 --> 00:32:16,840
And then I did go through the measuring my protein, measuring the meat and my macros.

651
00:32:16,840 --> 00:32:20,320
Because even though, yes, over a longer period of time, you don't want to keep doing it because

652
00:32:20,320 --> 00:32:22,460
it becomes like a stigma.

653
00:32:22,460 --> 00:32:26,380
But you do want to get that period of time when you are committed to learning about food.

654
00:32:26,380 --> 00:32:30,280
Because that I think is a basic foundational education for all of us, which is what am

655
00:32:30,280 --> 00:32:31,280
I eating?

656
00:32:31,280 --> 00:32:32,280
Nutrition literacy.

657
00:32:32,280 --> 00:32:33,280
Exactly.

658
00:32:33,280 --> 00:32:37,440
And that comes back to not just protein, which is of course, you know, a foundational macronutrient.

659
00:32:37,440 --> 00:32:40,080
But you're looking at food in general and you're trying to understand.

660
00:32:40,080 --> 00:32:45,160
For me, there was a period of time where I'm going to tell you girls, it's like, I would

661
00:32:45,160 --> 00:32:53,160
train the best on my leg days if I had beef and my best shoulder days would be on chicken.

662
00:32:53,160 --> 00:32:55,160
So my shoulders are made of chicken.

663
00:32:55,160 --> 00:32:58,160
And their booties are made of beef.

664
00:32:58,160 --> 00:33:01,760
And it's the point to which you have really conditioned yourself to your nutrition.

665
00:33:01,760 --> 00:33:05,560
And you're just like listening to your body and saying, OK, I had this.

666
00:33:05,560 --> 00:33:07,620
Now how does it feel for me when I'm training?

667
00:33:07,620 --> 00:33:08,620
And that's a period.

668
00:33:08,620 --> 00:33:12,480
And like, you have to invest in it and then kind of learn more about your food and how

669
00:33:12,480 --> 00:33:14,040
it kind of responds to your body.

670
00:33:14,040 --> 00:33:15,040
Yeah.

671
00:33:15,040 --> 00:33:19,200
I always say that learning nutrition literacy is like learning a foreign language.

672
00:33:19,200 --> 00:33:22,720
If you want to speak that language and you want to have a conversation with others in

673
00:33:22,720 --> 00:33:25,200
that language, you have to take the time to learn it.

674
00:33:25,200 --> 00:33:28,880
Otherwise, if you're just following meal plans or following what some coach off the internet

675
00:33:28,880 --> 00:33:31,520
told you, you're just doing Google Translate.

676
00:33:31,520 --> 00:33:34,600
So you're just taking a screenshot of what you think you might want to say and showing

677
00:33:34,600 --> 00:33:35,680
it to someone else.

678
00:33:35,680 --> 00:33:39,880
When you learn about macronutrients, when you learn about what the difference between

679
00:33:39,880 --> 00:33:44,760
one gram of protein per kg of body weight and two could do for you, you unlock an entire

680
00:33:44,760 --> 00:33:47,760
conversation that you would not have that access to otherwise.

681
00:33:47,760 --> 00:33:49,760
And that is beyond powerful.

682
00:33:49,760 --> 00:33:53,920
And you mentioned something I really wanted to ask you about today, Pari, which is hormone

683
00:33:53,920 --> 00:33:56,600
optimization through diet and training.

684
00:33:56,600 --> 00:33:58,720
I know that you work with a lot of women that are in menopause.

685
00:33:58,720 --> 00:34:02,080
In fact, that's kind of your specialty, paramenopause and menopause.

686
00:34:02,080 --> 00:34:06,840
Can you talk to me about some of the strength training and nutrition hacks that you use

687
00:34:06,840 --> 00:34:09,600
for women to optimize their hormone profile during that time?

688
00:34:09,600 --> 00:34:11,320
Oh, my God, I would love to.

689
00:34:11,320 --> 00:34:12,960
Why, thank you.

690
00:34:12,960 --> 00:34:13,960
Yeah.

691
00:34:13,960 --> 00:34:15,960
You're giving me a platform to speak about it.

692
00:34:15,960 --> 00:34:16,960
I'm crying horse.

693
00:34:16,960 --> 00:34:17,960
Right?

694
00:34:17,960 --> 00:34:18,960
Screaming my lungs out for someone to listen.

695
00:34:18,960 --> 00:34:23,600
In a gym somewhere, a sweaty gym talking to a woman.

696
00:34:23,600 --> 00:34:28,520
And I want to start with an example here, which is like, guess what kind of an example?

697
00:34:28,520 --> 00:34:34,640
Let's say you're a woman in your 40s and you have started getting the symptoms.

698
00:34:34,640 --> 00:34:35,640
The hot flushes.

699
00:34:35,640 --> 00:34:36,640
I would agree with that.

700
00:34:36,640 --> 00:34:37,640
That is awful.

701
00:34:37,640 --> 00:34:41,080
So just so you know, you are speaking to me directly now because I'm in parimenopause.

702
00:34:41,080 --> 00:34:43,520
I've been through the symptoms.

703
00:34:43,520 --> 00:34:48,720
So your nights feel sweatier.

704
00:34:48,720 --> 00:34:51,320
So your temperature changes in your body are slightly different.

705
00:34:51,320 --> 00:34:54,560
And then you would have those hot flashes, mood swings, right?

706
00:34:54,560 --> 00:34:55,560
You wouldn't know who you are.

707
00:34:55,560 --> 00:35:00,600
You're like, there's a stranger inside my body and I don't know who that person is anymore.

708
00:35:00,600 --> 00:35:05,680
And that you then go with that feeling like, I really don't know what's happening to me.

709
00:35:05,680 --> 00:35:08,680
There is a stranger in my body, by the way.

710
00:35:08,680 --> 00:35:12,580
That stranger will be injected in a few months.

711
00:35:12,580 --> 00:35:15,360
And so you go to a doctor.

712
00:35:15,360 --> 00:35:18,600
Guess what the doctor will tell you?

713
00:35:18,600 --> 00:35:19,600
You're fine.

714
00:35:19,600 --> 00:35:21,480
It's normal.

715
00:35:21,480 --> 00:35:23,560
That's one.

716
00:35:23,560 --> 00:35:27,520
The doctor would most likely give you an antidepressant.

717
00:35:27,520 --> 00:35:30,240
And it has happened to a lot of my clients.

718
00:35:30,240 --> 00:35:36,640
And at that point, when they reject, they say, I'm not going to be on an antidepressant

719
00:35:36,640 --> 00:35:38,040
pill.

720
00:35:38,040 --> 00:35:39,040
You know what?

721
00:35:39,040 --> 00:35:40,600
That is where you start asking yourself.

722
00:35:40,600 --> 00:35:41,600
Okay.

723
00:35:41,600 --> 00:35:42,600
That's one.

724
00:35:42,600 --> 00:35:47,960
What would an educated doctor who is probably from a developed country and knows a bit more

725
00:35:47,960 --> 00:35:50,280
is a female doctor, you know what?

726
00:35:50,280 --> 00:35:55,800
Doctors are, if you're lucky, you might get an estrogen patch or a shot of some level

727
00:35:55,800 --> 00:35:57,460
of hormone replacement therapy.

728
00:35:57,460 --> 00:35:59,480
They would talk about you, talk to you about it.

729
00:35:59,480 --> 00:36:05,840
But they would never say that the first intervention that you need to have is a lifestyle intervention.

730
00:36:05,840 --> 00:36:08,080
You don't need a medical intervention yet.

731
00:36:08,080 --> 00:36:09,980
You can go through a lifestyle intervention.

732
00:36:09,980 --> 00:36:13,080
And that's true because I feel like when I went through the experience, it was all about

733
00:36:13,080 --> 00:36:16,720
BHRT, you know, what hormones you can take, what you need to do.

734
00:36:16,720 --> 00:36:19,080
But no one ever said to me, right.

735
00:36:19,080 --> 00:36:24,400
You need to make sure you are exercising or you need to eat in a particular way.

736
00:36:24,400 --> 00:36:26,440
And there needs to be some changes about that.

737
00:36:26,440 --> 00:36:30,240
So what I always say to my clients is you need to see a functional doctor, someone who

738
00:36:30,240 --> 00:36:34,640
is really not just going to look at the, you know, your anxiety or your hot flashes.

739
00:36:34,640 --> 00:36:35,640
They're going to look at everything.

740
00:36:35,640 --> 00:36:37,440
They're going to look at your lifestyle.

741
00:36:37,440 --> 00:36:40,160
And I guess that's what you guys tend to do as well at the Lyft Clinic as well.

742
00:36:40,160 --> 00:36:41,320
Yeah, exactly that.

743
00:36:41,320 --> 00:36:44,560
I mean, of course, lifestyle intervention is the first place you go.

744
00:36:44,560 --> 00:36:48,720
And I think it's so funny that it's the last place in conventional medicine because it's

745
00:36:48,720 --> 00:36:53,120
the first place in functional medicine and not only, you know, diet and nutrition intervention,

746
00:36:53,120 --> 00:36:55,120
but also ALMI.

747
00:36:55,120 --> 00:36:56,640
What is your muscle mass?

748
00:36:56,640 --> 00:36:59,040
What does your body look like from the inside?

749
00:36:59,040 --> 00:37:03,160
I think a DEXA scan should be one of the first steps that almost every woman goes through

750
00:37:03,160 --> 00:37:05,240
that starts to have symptoms of perimenopause.

751
00:37:05,240 --> 00:37:06,240
Now you tell me.

752
00:37:06,240 --> 00:37:07,240
Yeah, get in there.

753
00:37:07,240 --> 00:37:08,240
Get in there for your scan.

754
00:37:08,240 --> 00:37:12,120
You know what, ask women around you who knows about what sarcopenia is.

755
00:37:12,120 --> 00:37:13,120
Yes.

756
00:37:13,120 --> 00:37:14,120
Yes.

757
00:37:14,120 --> 00:37:17,360
One of the leading problems of frailty in older age for women in Asia.

758
00:37:17,360 --> 00:37:21,000
My mom didn't know it and there was a period of time where my dad had a pacemaker inside

759
00:37:21,000 --> 00:37:23,360
him so he was medically sick.

760
00:37:23,360 --> 00:37:26,440
And my mom was the one crying to me and she was like, I don't know what's going on with

761
00:37:26,440 --> 00:37:27,440
me.

762
00:37:27,440 --> 00:37:28,440
Like, I really don't know.

763
00:37:28,440 --> 00:37:29,440
Things are falling off my hand.

764
00:37:29,440 --> 00:37:30,600
I'm feeling weak.

765
00:37:30,600 --> 00:37:35,240
I can't walk as much as I used to do before and I'm not, you know, she was not medically

766
00:37:35,240 --> 00:37:36,680
unfit.

767
00:37:36,680 --> 00:37:40,880
And I had to tell her that and like, you are, there is a medical condition, mom.

768
00:37:40,880 --> 00:37:41,880
It's called sarcopenia.

769
00:37:41,880 --> 00:37:42,880
I'm sorry.

770
00:37:42,880 --> 00:37:43,880
That's right.

771
00:37:43,880 --> 00:37:45,160
Not a lot of people know about it.

772
00:37:45,160 --> 00:37:46,520
Yeah, you're absolutely right.

773
00:37:46,520 --> 00:37:48,960
So, Pari, are you of Indian descent?

774
00:37:48,960 --> 00:37:49,960
Yes.

775
00:37:49,960 --> 00:37:50,960
Yeah.

776
00:37:50,960 --> 00:37:53,560
So obviously in India, there's a lot of vegetarians and there's a lot of this and I guess, you

777
00:37:53,560 --> 00:37:57,560
know, like with your mom and maybe with some other relatives, you know, the idea of, you

778
00:37:57,560 --> 00:38:01,280
know, eating meat is like, well, you know, I'm, I shouldn't be doing this.

779
00:38:01,280 --> 00:38:03,400
This is not, you know, good for me.

780
00:38:03,400 --> 00:38:07,880
How do you convince somebody who is at that age, you know, going through, you know, issues

781
00:38:07,880 --> 00:38:12,520
with their muscle mass and, you know, changes in their lifestyle that actually meat is really

782
00:38:12,520 --> 00:38:13,520
important?

783
00:38:13,520 --> 00:38:17,000
So it could be from, you know, like it could be from a, you know, religious or an ethical

784
00:38:17,000 --> 00:38:22,160
perspective, but for somebody who just says, I don't like it or I don't want to eat it,

785
00:38:22,160 --> 00:38:26,840
you know, how can you encourage them that actually you kind of need it?

786
00:38:26,840 --> 00:38:27,840
It's the missing piece.

787
00:38:27,840 --> 00:38:28,840
Oh my God.

788
00:38:28,840 --> 00:38:29,840
You know what?

789
00:38:29,840 --> 00:38:31,320
The sneakiest way to do it.

790
00:38:31,320 --> 00:38:32,320
Don't tell them.

791
00:38:32,320 --> 00:38:33,320
We're all about sneaking.

792
00:38:33,320 --> 00:38:36,560
Seriously, you just give them something and say, it's like, you know, just have this.

793
00:38:36,560 --> 00:38:40,260
You give them a supplement and that is the first place to start because they think of

794
00:38:40,260 --> 00:38:42,000
supplements as medicine.

795
00:38:42,000 --> 00:38:43,000
Interesting.

796
00:38:43,000 --> 00:38:47,640
So Jasmine, you're all about that low carb life, right?

797
00:38:47,640 --> 00:38:48,640
Yup.

798
00:38:48,640 --> 00:38:49,640
Have been for a while now.

799
00:38:49,640 --> 00:38:51,920
So I'm assuming that your groceries look a lot like our house.

800
00:38:51,920 --> 00:38:53,640
Lots of fish, tons of meat.

801
00:38:53,640 --> 00:38:54,640
Yup.

802
00:38:54,640 --> 00:38:55,640
Sounds about right.

803
00:38:55,640 --> 00:38:59,280
Honestly, we get the best cuts of meat from the meat club, the premier online source for

804
00:38:59,280 --> 00:39:02,640
top quality Australian and New Zealand produce in Singapore.

805
00:39:02,640 --> 00:39:03,640
Yeah.

806
00:39:03,640 --> 00:39:06,880
We also love the meat club around our house for the subscription service, making sure

807
00:39:06,880 --> 00:39:09,960
that we don't have to spend too much time shopping or planning.

808
00:39:09,960 --> 00:39:12,360
The meat just is there.

809
00:39:12,360 --> 00:39:16,800
And as a thank you for all our listeners, new customers can get $12 off their first

810
00:39:16,800 --> 00:39:20,480
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811
00:39:20,480 --> 00:39:22,080
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812
00:39:22,080 --> 00:39:26,560
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813
00:39:26,560 --> 00:39:30,960
And for more updates, recipes and special offers, don't forget to follow the meat club

814
00:39:30,960 --> 00:39:34,400
on Instagram at themeatclub.sg.

815
00:39:34,400 --> 00:39:38,920
That's T-H-E-M-E-A-T-C-L-U-B-S-G.

816
00:39:38,920 --> 00:39:41,360
And now back to the conversation.

817
00:39:41,360 --> 00:39:43,520
They're eating beef liver.

818
00:39:43,520 --> 00:39:44,520
Yeah.

819
00:39:44,520 --> 00:39:48,040
And they wouldn't know because it's not like I'm telling them to put the chicken on the

820
00:39:48,040 --> 00:39:49,040
plate.

821
00:39:49,040 --> 00:39:50,040
Yeah.

822
00:39:50,040 --> 00:39:51,360
I'm saying that, you know what, have this.

823
00:39:51,360 --> 00:39:52,720
This is great.

824
00:39:52,720 --> 00:39:56,560
And if you have this for like a few months, you would see a change in the way you feel

825
00:39:56,560 --> 00:39:57,840
is the first place to start.

826
00:39:57,840 --> 00:40:01,560
And then as they start taking a bit more protein in their diet, which is through some form

827
00:40:01,560 --> 00:40:05,920
of supplementation of pea protein or whatever protein that they're having with them, that

828
00:40:05,920 --> 00:40:11,080
is when you start giving them a bit more education and telling them, here's what you were having.

829
00:40:11,080 --> 00:40:15,080
And so now I would like you to ask, and which is what I do with my clients as well, which

830
00:40:15,080 --> 00:40:19,640
is like, I'd like you to ask yourself, what is the easiest way for you to get some level

831
00:40:19,640 --> 00:40:20,740
of protein?

832
00:40:20,740 --> 00:40:25,720
And I would not be the one telling you this, but I want to see you experiment with different

833
00:40:25,720 --> 00:40:28,600
kinds of protein to start incorporating that into your diet.

834
00:40:28,600 --> 00:40:30,280
If I'm hungry.

835
00:40:30,280 --> 00:40:31,920
Maybe I can try some egg whites.

836
00:40:31,920 --> 00:40:32,920
Yeah.

837
00:40:32,920 --> 00:40:36,240
You know, I'll just try it in a way, which is a recipe that maybe does not feel yucky

838
00:40:36,240 --> 00:40:37,820
to me, you know?

839
00:40:37,820 --> 00:40:42,880
And then maybe I will try seeing if I probably won't have fish in a different way.

840
00:40:42,880 --> 00:40:45,520
Like, you know, that is how they start kind of looking at it.

841
00:40:45,520 --> 00:40:49,000
But I don't want to get like head banging conversations where you're just like trying

842
00:40:49,000 --> 00:40:51,560
to tell them, no, you need to have more meat on your plates.

843
00:40:51,560 --> 00:40:53,120
Just take the protein.

844
00:40:53,120 --> 00:40:54,120
Yeah.

845
00:40:54,120 --> 00:40:57,800
And we talked about nutrition literacy as a process of learning a language.

846
00:40:57,800 --> 00:40:59,920
You can also see it as a process of experimentation.

847
00:40:59,920 --> 00:41:00,920
Yes.

848
00:41:00,920 --> 00:41:01,920
Right?

849
00:41:01,920 --> 00:41:02,920
So try this intervention.

850
00:41:02,920 --> 00:41:07,600
So test this hypothesis that more protein will help you function better, feel better.

851
00:41:07,600 --> 00:41:11,640
Test this hypothesis with whatever source of protein you're comfortable with and then

852
00:41:11,640 --> 00:41:13,560
observe the outcomes, right?

853
00:41:13,560 --> 00:41:14,920
Measure the outcomes in your own body.

854
00:41:14,920 --> 00:41:19,940
And if you see that they're favorable, then it would be to your benefit to seek out better

855
00:41:19,940 --> 00:41:21,200
sources of protein.

856
00:41:21,200 --> 00:41:22,200
Exactly.

857
00:41:22,200 --> 00:41:23,200
Right?

858
00:41:23,200 --> 00:41:24,200
More bioavailable sources of protein.

859
00:41:24,200 --> 00:41:25,200
Exactly.

860
00:41:25,200 --> 00:41:26,200
It's a scientific experiment.

861
00:41:26,200 --> 00:41:29,560
And if more women would undertake it, I think they would admit to themselves that they're

862
00:41:29,560 --> 00:41:30,560
seeing a different result.

863
00:41:30,560 --> 00:41:35,600
I think, Amanda, that is very, very on point, which is essentially like you're saying, right?

864
00:41:35,600 --> 00:41:40,240
The analogy that uses amazing, which is like the Google Translate analogy, you don't copy

865
00:41:40,240 --> 00:41:41,240
paste.

866
00:41:41,240 --> 00:41:42,240
Yeah.

867
00:41:42,240 --> 00:41:43,240
Right?

868
00:41:43,240 --> 00:41:44,240
You never learn.

869
00:41:44,240 --> 00:41:45,240
You never learn if you copy paste.

870
00:41:45,240 --> 00:41:47,240
It might get you to the bathroom in a different country.

871
00:41:47,240 --> 00:41:48,240
Exactly.

872
00:41:48,240 --> 00:41:52,040
So even when I'm looking at the clients, Jasmin, to your point about coming from an Indian

873
00:41:52,040 --> 00:41:53,040
descentory.

874
00:41:53,040 --> 00:41:57,840
So I think even here, you would have the men who do not want to take that much protein.

875
00:41:57,840 --> 00:42:02,520
There is this stigma around it, like whatever gut health or whatever it is, I do not want

876
00:42:02,520 --> 00:42:04,200
to go there.

877
00:42:04,200 --> 00:42:09,200
And then I would just give them the idea about recovery.

878
00:42:09,200 --> 00:42:15,080
And I say, OK, do your training and see how you feel.

879
00:42:15,080 --> 00:42:18,320
You talked a little bit about sarcopenia in your mom's generation.

880
00:42:18,320 --> 00:42:23,240
And I think, I'm not sure if we're all comfortable talking about our moms, but I can share my

881
00:42:23,240 --> 00:42:24,240
mom's story.

882
00:42:24,240 --> 00:42:29,440
So my mom is 74, never did any sort of strength training, regular exercise, anything like

883
00:42:29,440 --> 00:42:30,440
that.

884
00:42:30,440 --> 00:42:33,600
And when I became, obviously, really embedded in my profession, I was always kind of pushing

885
00:42:33,600 --> 00:42:35,560
her, Mom, you got to lift weights, you got to do something.

886
00:42:35,560 --> 00:42:40,080
And she would always say, when I'm retired and when my career isn't so demanding, I will

887
00:42:40,080 --> 00:42:41,800
get on that.

888
00:42:41,800 --> 00:42:47,240
And to her credit, she retired 12 years ago now, gosh, 14 years ago, 60.

889
00:42:47,240 --> 00:42:52,120
And she has strength trained committedly since that time.

890
00:42:52,120 --> 00:42:53,120
My mom lifts weights.

891
00:42:53,120 --> 00:42:55,560
I bought her a little pair of weights because she's here visiting in Singapore right now.

892
00:42:55,560 --> 00:42:58,960
I bought her a little pair of weights from Decathlon and she's lifting them.

893
00:42:58,960 --> 00:43:04,360
And she has made that commitment that late in life because she understands now the importance

894
00:43:04,360 --> 00:43:05,360
in that.

895
00:43:05,360 --> 00:43:09,120
And I think we talk about women in their 40s, right, and talking to women that are going

896
00:43:09,120 --> 00:43:10,480
through perimenopause.

897
00:43:10,480 --> 00:43:14,440
But how do you talk to women whose parents are struggling with these issues?

898
00:43:14,440 --> 00:43:16,760
How do we translate it to that generation?

899
00:43:16,760 --> 00:43:23,880
I think the way, and I have had those conversations, by the way, to the generation like ours, who's

900
00:43:23,880 --> 00:43:26,600
bringing their parents in to the gym.

901
00:43:26,600 --> 00:43:31,560
And that would be around training for the mobility, the movement itself.

902
00:43:31,560 --> 00:43:34,220
And so you start from there.

903
00:43:34,220 --> 00:43:38,440
That is both an intervention that the education is for not just the training but also for

904
00:43:38,440 --> 00:43:39,440
the nutrition, right?

905
00:43:39,440 --> 00:43:40,440
So it's both ways.

906
00:43:40,440 --> 00:43:47,000
But I think it starts with as simple things as you take a box and then you ask them to

907
00:43:47,000 --> 00:43:50,960
sit within that and stand up and how you feel about it.

908
00:43:50,960 --> 00:43:52,040
And then you start from there.

909
00:43:52,040 --> 00:43:58,080
And we have had quite a few aging parents come in and start seeing the value of it.

910
00:43:58,080 --> 00:44:02,240
And I think that is something that is coming more from our generation because we are sandwiched

911
00:44:02,240 --> 00:44:04,920
between two generations that are totally diverse.

912
00:44:04,920 --> 00:44:11,440
We had that generation of women, our parents, our moms, who were all about safety, right?

913
00:44:11,440 --> 00:44:13,200
So we were all like, be safe.

914
00:44:13,200 --> 00:44:14,400
Get a certain amount of money.

915
00:44:14,400 --> 00:44:15,400
Get a husband.

916
00:44:15,400 --> 00:44:16,400
Get kids.

917
00:44:16,400 --> 00:44:17,400
Get a house.

918
00:44:17,400 --> 00:44:18,400
Get a job.

919
00:44:18,400 --> 00:44:21,640
Never, ever go against conventional wisdom.

920
00:44:21,640 --> 00:44:22,640
Never question.

921
00:44:22,640 --> 00:44:23,640
Ever.

922
00:44:23,640 --> 00:44:24,960
Do what you're told.

923
00:44:24,960 --> 00:44:25,960
Stick to the lane.

924
00:44:25,960 --> 00:44:27,920
And society has norms for a reason.

925
00:44:27,920 --> 00:44:29,320
Just fit into that box.

926
00:44:29,320 --> 00:44:35,280
And then our kids are the ones that are like, I'm going to question everything out there.

927
00:44:35,280 --> 00:44:36,920
Oh, even my two year olds questioning.

928
00:44:36,920 --> 00:44:38,280
Yeah, I'm going to question everything.

929
00:44:38,280 --> 00:44:40,360
I literally don't believe in what you're telling me right now.

930
00:44:40,360 --> 00:44:41,360
Yeah.

931
00:44:41,360 --> 00:44:42,360
Yeah.

932
00:44:42,360 --> 00:44:43,360
And if I don't want to do it, I'm not doing it.

933
00:44:43,360 --> 00:44:44,360
I'm not going to do it.

934
00:44:44,360 --> 00:44:45,360
Yeah.

935
00:44:45,360 --> 00:44:47,040
And then even my nine year old, he's like, I wish I was like him.

936
00:44:47,040 --> 00:44:48,040
He says, I know to everything.

937
00:44:48,040 --> 00:44:49,040
I know.

938
00:44:49,040 --> 00:44:50,040
I know.

939
00:44:50,040 --> 00:44:53,520
We should have him on the podcast.

940
00:44:53,520 --> 00:44:59,240
And so we are the ones that are right in the middle, just about independent enough in our

941
00:44:59,240 --> 00:45:03,400
thinking, in our finances, in stuff that we have now started kind of looking at ourselves

942
00:45:03,400 --> 00:45:06,000
as independent identities.

943
00:45:06,000 --> 00:45:10,800
And we are the ones that are best placed to kind of have that conversation with our parents,

944
00:45:10,800 --> 00:45:14,480
you know, and say, okay, maybe mama, the way we're looking at things is not exactly how

945
00:45:14,480 --> 00:45:15,780
it's supposed to be.

946
00:45:15,780 --> 00:45:21,120
Maybe we could see how you feel, just kind of movement prepping, doing a few things that

947
00:45:21,120 --> 00:45:25,040
kind of take you from point A to point B and see how you feel about it.

948
00:45:25,040 --> 00:45:26,520
I feel like I'm really lucky.

949
00:45:26,520 --> 00:45:27,920
My mom was always really sporty.

950
00:45:27,920 --> 00:45:28,920
I was not sporty.

951
00:45:28,920 --> 00:45:30,920
So I wish I'd actually gone to my mom's side.

952
00:45:30,920 --> 00:45:36,360
But even now, if I, yeah, if I took my mom to a gym, she would be there and she'd be

953
00:45:36,360 --> 00:45:37,760
doing the same as me.

954
00:45:37,760 --> 00:45:41,400
Like, you know, she's the person who's like, I'm not old.

955
00:45:41,400 --> 00:45:42,400
She's not old, by the way.

956
00:45:42,400 --> 00:45:44,880
So my mom, mom, mom, definitely not old.

957
00:45:44,880 --> 00:45:47,720
So my mom is 60.

958
00:45:47,720 --> 00:45:48,720
She's just 1060.

959
00:45:48,720 --> 00:45:49,720
Wow.

960
00:45:49,720 --> 00:45:54,000
So she was always a young mom and she, you know, she'll dress really cool.

961
00:45:54,000 --> 00:45:56,960
She'll, she'll, you know, go to the gym.

962
00:45:56,960 --> 00:45:58,360
She's got energy.

963
00:45:58,360 --> 00:45:59,920
And I love that about her.

964
00:45:59,920 --> 00:46:00,920
So so lucky.

965
00:46:00,920 --> 00:46:01,920
Yeah, I feel that.

966
00:46:01,920 --> 00:46:02,920
I love you, mommy.

967
00:46:02,920 --> 00:46:06,720
Shout out to the moms, all three of the moms.

968
00:46:06,720 --> 00:46:08,840
Well, party, we do have to start wrapping up here.

969
00:46:08,840 --> 00:46:13,560
But most important question of our conversation today, because I feel like, and if you don't

970
00:46:13,560 --> 00:46:18,000
mind me disclosing this, I'm about to, you're 43 and you're nailing it.

971
00:46:18,000 --> 00:46:20,640
It's out there.

972
00:46:20,640 --> 00:46:25,040
And you know, you perhaps five years ago weren't nailing it as hard as you are now.

973
00:46:25,040 --> 00:46:28,800
So I want to know what is in your forties formula?

974
00:46:28,800 --> 00:46:32,200
How did you crack the code so that you could thrive in this decade?

975
00:46:32,200 --> 00:46:34,280
And how can you advise that other women do the same?

976
00:46:34,280 --> 00:46:39,360
Oh, well, I, you know, when you, you send that question to me, I said, I'm an engineer,

977
00:46:39,360 --> 00:46:43,840
so I'm going to break it down into its left side and its right side and add up the equation.

978
00:46:43,840 --> 00:46:44,840
You could see it's a formula.

979
00:46:44,840 --> 00:46:48,560
It's like, no, you have to stick to your number of words.

980
00:46:48,560 --> 00:46:55,800
So I would just say, I think my forties formula is self-love.

981
00:46:55,800 --> 00:47:00,480
It is two words, which has meant nothing to me for a long time.

982
00:47:00,480 --> 00:47:02,280
I have loved everyone.

983
00:47:02,280 --> 00:47:04,480
I have loved things and objects.

984
00:47:04,480 --> 00:47:09,160
You know, I have had relationships where I poured all my love out.

985
00:47:09,160 --> 00:47:13,840
And I have had objects that I have poured my love out, my business or whatever it is.

986
00:47:13,840 --> 00:47:19,880
And then in your forties, I think you're best placed to truly find love from within for

987
00:47:19,880 --> 00:47:21,520
yourself.

988
00:47:21,520 --> 00:47:26,600
And that for me, I think is the magic because then you know that your physical and mental

989
00:47:26,600 --> 00:47:31,880
wellbeing and health is your utmost priority and you'll do everything.

990
00:47:31,880 --> 00:47:33,600
I love that.

991
00:47:33,600 --> 00:47:34,600
Right?

992
00:47:34,600 --> 00:47:35,600
Yeah.

993
00:47:35,600 --> 00:47:36,600
That is beautiful.

994
00:47:36,600 --> 00:47:37,600
And I have to say unexpected.

995
00:47:37,600 --> 00:47:40,920
That's where you're going to go with this and I really love that you did.

996
00:47:40,920 --> 00:47:42,700
Thank you so much for joining us today, Pari.

997
00:47:42,700 --> 00:47:45,160
Your insights have been invaluable and this has been a great chat.

998
00:47:45,160 --> 00:47:46,600
We're going to have this chat over coffee later.

999
00:47:46,600 --> 00:47:47,600
Okay.

1000
00:47:47,600 --> 00:47:48,600
So we're going to continue this chat outside the studio.

1001
00:47:48,600 --> 00:47:49,600
I haven't said so much now.

1002
00:47:49,600 --> 00:47:52,320
We're going to continue from here on.

1003
00:47:52,320 --> 00:47:53,880
Thank you so much again.

1004
00:47:53,880 --> 00:47:55,760
It was a pleasure, Amanda, Jasmine.

1005
00:47:55,760 --> 00:47:57,240
Thank you so much for having me here.

1006
00:47:57,240 --> 00:47:58,240
Thanks.

1007
00:47:58,240 --> 00:48:00,280
This is Paul, our editor.

1008
00:48:00,280 --> 00:48:05,280
He's a 25 year old unmarried Singaporean guy listening to the ramblings of 12 older women

1009
00:48:05,280 --> 00:48:08,960
on everything from menopause to weightlifting to sex.

1010
00:48:08,960 --> 00:48:11,520
So Paul, what's your thoughts on today's conversation?

1011
00:48:11,520 --> 00:48:12,520
Hey, hey.

1012
00:48:12,520 --> 00:48:13,520
Hello there again.

1013
00:48:13,520 --> 00:48:18,360
I don't exactly have much of an opinion about strength training.

1014
00:48:18,360 --> 00:48:21,880
It's definitely not something I do and I'm pretty much not athletic.

1015
00:48:21,880 --> 00:48:22,880
Sorry about that.

1016
00:48:22,880 --> 00:48:27,040
But it's a great insight to life of being a strength coach and your story.

1017
00:48:27,040 --> 00:48:28,040
So thank you, Pari.

1018
00:48:28,040 --> 00:48:29,040
See you all.

1019
00:48:29,040 --> 00:48:30,040
Bye bye.

1020
00:48:30,040 --> 00:48:35,240
Hey guys, did you know that you can leave us questions and comments on FanList?

1021
00:48:35,240 --> 00:48:36,240
That's right.

1022
00:48:36,240 --> 00:48:40,200
On FanList.com slash the 40s formula, you can leave us a voice note where you can ask

1023
00:48:40,200 --> 00:48:43,240
us anything, leave us your feedback or just say hi.

1024
00:48:43,240 --> 00:48:46,800
Meghmak Khan also gave us this incredible five star review.

1025
00:48:46,800 --> 00:48:48,080
Great quality chats.

1026
00:48:48,080 --> 00:48:52,120
I love how someone said, you don't lose, you learn in the first episode.

1027
00:48:52,120 --> 00:48:54,400
This is so applicable to everything in life.

1028
00:48:54,400 --> 00:48:58,840
I've already used it when talking to my kids in sports and fitness and weight loss.

1029
00:48:58,840 --> 00:48:59,840
It's not a loss.

1030
00:48:59,840 --> 00:49:01,600
It's an opportunity for growth.

1031
00:49:01,600 --> 00:49:04,160
I also love setting the intention for the day.

1032
00:49:04,160 --> 00:49:06,560
Next thing when you wake up, you set your intention.

1033
00:49:06,560 --> 00:49:07,560
Love listening in.

1034
00:49:07,560 --> 00:49:12,840
Meghmak, thank you so much for your wonderful review and definitely you never lose.

1035
00:49:12,840 --> 00:49:14,660
You always learn.

1036
00:49:14,660 --> 00:49:19,400
Before we go, please remember to hit subscribe and take a moment to support the 40s formula

1037
00:49:19,400 --> 00:49:22,800
by leaving a review on your favorite podcast platform.

1038
00:49:22,800 --> 00:49:26,600
Your reviews will help us to reach more people and allow us to continue to bring valuable

1039
00:49:26,600 --> 00:49:27,600
content.

1040
00:49:27,600 --> 00:49:30,700
It should only take a moment and it's a free way for you to support the show.

1041
00:49:30,700 --> 00:49:36,460
You can also stay updated with the 40s formula by following us on Instagram at the 40s formula.

1042
00:49:36,460 --> 00:49:37,680
All one word.

1043
00:49:37,680 --> 00:49:41,240
We share behind the scenes insights, episode updates and much more.

1044
00:49:41,240 --> 00:49:43,920
So please be sure to hit that follow button.

1045
00:49:43,920 --> 00:49:45,560
We appreciate your time and support.

1046
00:49:45,560 --> 00:49:48,760
Thank you for being part of this community and we'll be back next week for more empowering

1047
00:49:48,760 --> 00:49:51,160
conversations with inspiring guests.

1048
00:49:51,160 --> 00:50:12,320
Bye.

1049
00:50:21,160 --> 00:50:38,600
Okay, sure.

1050
00:50:38,600 --> 00:50:39,600
Shall I move?

1051
00:50:39,600 --> 00:50:40,600
Should I?

1052
00:50:40,600 --> 00:50:41,600
From this side?

1053
00:50:41,600 --> 00:50:42,600
We're all so scared to touch the equipment.

1054
00:50:42,600 --> 00:50:43,600
Sorry Paul, you're the expert.

1055
00:50:43,600 --> 00:50:44,600
Sorry.

1056
00:50:44,600 --> 00:50:47,480
Oh, you can move that thing.

1057
00:50:47,480 --> 00:50:48,480
Okay.

1058
00:50:48,480 --> 00:50:49,480
Great.

1059
00:50:49,480 --> 00:50:50,480
Hello.

1060
00:50:50,480 --> 00:50:51,480
Hi.

1061
00:50:51,480 --> 00:50:52,480
Yeah.

1062
00:50:52,480 --> 00:50:54,960
I think that's Paul's subtle way of telling us that we are quite loud and Pari is probably

1063
00:50:54,960 --> 00:50:57,000
not as loud, which is like totally cool.

1064
00:50:57,000 --> 00:51:26,120
But yeah, so it's like, you know, yeah, get up close in person with that mic.