Good day.
Good fucking day.
We're so good about the day.
I am fucking I'm already guest.
I move Sunday.
The leg Sunday is my new leg day instead of Mondays.
And I'm fucking tired as fuck.
So and you said you're hungover.
So yeah, let's fucking clink clink real quick.
I mean, I can clink, you know, I need to get my ass back in the gym,
but clink clink to just clink clinking.
Well, guess what?
When I get up there and less than show you what you need to do, bitch.
All right, can't wait.
I'm going to make you drop that ass low.
All right, I mean, like work, work, work, work, work, work, work, work, work, work, work, work, work, work, work, work, work, work, work.
Yeah, I try.
Okay.
So now that we're talking about working out, let me segue into this bullshit.
I got a whole list of shit for today.
Starting with Nike.com.
I went on Nike.com to see what they had for sale, right?
Because they have their back to school sale and see if you had any Air Max 90s or AJ ones.
Those never go on sale.
Never.
Ever. I'm looking at the active the at the leisure or what do you call it?
The active wear.
Yeah.
Bitch, why the fuck are there like 40 pound plus
overweight people now in modeling that shit?
And I'm like, this is what's wrong with America.
This is why everybody's fat and lazy.
It's because of Nike putting their goddamn fucking.
It's like those get your shoes.
You just slipped them on.
You don't have to fucking bend over anymore.
And tie your laces and shit.
Fuck man.
So I would urge you to go to Nike.com and check out the athletes or
athletes or active wear section and you be the judge.
Oh, God damn it.
Now you're getting me started.
Shit.
Fucking shit.
Yeah.
Fucking clean, clean to that.
I got to take a sip.
I'm like, what the fuck is going on?
What are you drinking?
Soco, you said?
Yes, ma'am.
I can't do that anymore.
I'm trying to finish the bottles.
No, right.
I'm doing I'm still on that fucking staff are, you know, right?
That fucking Jesus, that fucking Jesus.
The Bible, that Bible story where Jesus turns like
water into wine or some shit like that.
Yeah.
Yeah, of course.
I'm fucking Catholic.
I mean, I made my first communion.
Shit, I'm surprised, you know, God still allows me to live.
Well, you let's all the pedophile priest.
Yeah.
No, sir, I'm not going to tell you my sins.
And I'm not going to say Ten Hill Marys.
But I put on the football field.
Yeah, I think I actually fell asleep
after I did my first communion and I had to say my sins.
But like I was fucking like, I don't know, nine.
Yeah.
But, you know, hey, amen.
Let's let's let's keep going.
I don't remember what I don't remember what the fuck I was trying to say.
Oh, yeah.
OK, so that fucking the I guess where he turns water into wine
and they don't run out and they feel like a fucking city worth of.
I know with all the fish and the.
Yeah, well, that's how I feel with this fucking big old handle of Bombay Sapphire.
This shit is just still fucking full and I'm trying to plow through this shit.
I'm like, this shit should have been gone like a month ago.
But if I was there, it'd be gone.
Bitch, yes. Clank, clank.
I wouldn't be drinking this fucking soco.
I'd be drinking fucking Bombay.
I'd be sitting on cloud nine like, yes, whatever.
That's all I got.
Oh.
I'm a while.
Hold on. I'm just taking an ad bill right now.
With my fuck.
Oh, my fucking soco.
So what did you do yesterday?
You just had a little too much fun.
So you're over.
OK, so here it goes.
So yesterday I decided to watch some Netflix and I this take.
You are all, dude.
And I was like, I don't like this guy.
And again, Paul, dude, what?
Jake Paul.
Oh, fuck that guy. Exactly.
You don't get me started.
I did not purchase the fight last night because guess what?
I got it for free.
And I was like, I hope this little Nate Diaz, motherfucker,
beats him. I love Nate.
Both. Yes.
Yes, brother.
Brothers bottom line.
Yeah, yes, exactly.
Bottom line.
Let's let's let's do this.
UFC, MMA, whatever.
The Diaz brothers, they're solid.
I I I I'm a fan.
I'm a fan.
Same here.
And I was thinking, well, let me just see because I watch the Britney Spears.
I watched documentaries.
I just want to see.
Let me just not be so bias on people because I'm quick to judge.
And I think all of us are.
Yes.
So when I watch a documentary, sometimes I'm just like, damn,
shit, I shouldn't be judging a book by its color or I shouldn't.
Right.
I shouldn't be listening to this online nonsense or whatever.
And this is really what happened.
Wow. And I get a little bit of like empathy or or sympathy, either or if I write.
In your voice and so I watched the stupid Jake Paul documentary.
I'm sorry, it wasn't stupid.
I watched his documentary.
OK. And why didn't you watch it to the end?
But you watched enough.
I watched enough.
I got enough info in town to make my own conscious decision
of how I want to fucking judge him.
And boxers, yo.
Yeah. But you know what?
He he honestly, according to the documentary,
he was truly training to be a boxer and and and, you know, him and his brother.
And I don't know.
It just goes into it if you guys want to watch it.
I don't know.
But I can't tell their hair.
Their hair.
I know drives me fucking nuts.
I was like, oh, white trash, white trash.
You see white trash, if you think about it, he was in my mind.
Where are they from?
I don't know where they're from.
It was like Tennessee or.
Oh, yeah. All right.
Well, I think I think don't don't quote me.
But I kind of lost interest in the midst of watching his documentary.
But he was mowing lawns and then his brother and him had this beef.
He stole a girlfriend and then they decided to.
I don't know.
So I found out, excuse me.
I found out that they were having a fight.
And guess what?
I can watch it for free.
So I'm watching.
I was like, I a big boxing fan.
I mean, bitch, I love boxing.
Like anybody can choke somebody out.
I do love UFC.
I do love MMA.
I do love all that to do all this kickboxing.
I was in kickboxing since I was 19 years old.
I do love all that where you can just use.
But I believe boxing is a sport.
Like who can just put your dukes up for 10 fucking rounds like that?
It's hard if you ever try.
You watched the whole fight last night.
Yes, I did.
Did it go all 10?
Yes, it does.
Oh, shit, man.
I just saw like the out and not the outtakes.
I was when I log when I woke up this morning, my phone was not blown up.
Like if if there's a fight on people will be hitting me up like, you know, with text.
And I'm like, OK, so my boy did lose.
But I didn't know anything about those two brothers other than their fucking
YouTube fucking people until Brogan said, oh, they're legit fighters.
I'm on the podcast.
I was like, fuck in Mayweather and Mayweather just laid them out.
He's like, hey, I want to be like right and tight.
And then I'm going to fucking just lay you out.
I just was just hoping.
But one of my boys from when I one of my old coworkers from Irvine, he's like,
he's like, those two guys are legit boxers.
Like you said, he's like, he's going to mop the floor with Nate, your boy.
And I'm just like, shit, I'm like, I don't I can't watch that.
I my heart belongs to Nate Diaz.
Yeah. And I, you know what?
I'm just going to say one thing.
Nate Diaz was a UFC.
Like he has scar tissue on his face.
So it they honestly.
So don't act like you punch his fucking face or his cheek.
You think you fucking did it?
He has scar tissue.
Scar tissue is very, very sensitive.
Right.
But did you watch the way in?
I watched the way in, well, like maybe 30 seconds of it.
I've watched on their Instagram.
I was like, when they put their dudes up and then fucking Nate, he tried to.
He did a kick and a slap.
He didn't hit him, though.
But I was just like, oh, I would love for you to drop your mitts
and the fucking ring and just stocked and slapped the fuck out of this guy.
I hope you find him in the parking lot when he's leaving the fucking bench.
Please do.
Just fucking put him in a choke hold because that's what you do.
But, you know, he's he's he's going boxing arena.
This is this is and boxing is a sport.
It really is who can fucking hold your fucking put your dukes up
for that many rounds and that long and punch.
And and it's just you're just using your arms.
This is this is a sport and I love boxing.
I love it for MMA.
Oh, yeah. Yeah. Oh, yeah.
So what that means?
Oh, go ahead. I'm sorry. Oh, I'm just saying just like Mike Tyson,
Holyfield, all that. I love it.
I that's my genre. Right. OK.
So I I'm looking at my fucking hoodie.
I have a zip up hoodie that's hanging up on my coat rack right here.
But it's wildcard boxing, which is Freddie Roach's gym, right?
The wildcard gym. Oh, yeah.
Yeah. So anytime I wear that, somebody always fucking ask,
do you box and I'm like, what?
A, no, do I look like I'm coordinated enough?
B and C, they're like, they're like, well, you have
are you always wear this jacket?
I'm like, do you know who the fuck Freddie Roach is?
Like what?
No, I'm not a boxer.
Freddie Roach is God.
And I'll just leave it at that.
I'm like, just Google him.
I'm not going to get into it.
Clearly, you guys don't know your fucking shit.
Yeah. I well, I hate Oscar Del Jolla, but I mean,
oh, we all fucking do.
Team Shauna or Shayna Mowkler.
Yes, amen.
You know, he told me I would get an autograph if I had boobs.
And you're like, bitch.
Oh, my God.
He signed this napkin.
He's like, you get an autograph if you had boobs.
And unfortunately, all the girls I was with just got boobs.
They just bought them.
And I was like, can you sign my napkin?
Can you sign my napkin?
But it's but that's OK.
Fuck Oscar Del Jolla.
Like, I don't know.
I used to like you, but I do like the boxing as a sport.
I love it. Yes.
And I'm actually glad that.
This little Jake guy is trying to like ramp it up again.
You know what? I got to give you.
I will agree with you on that because boxing is dead
until this motherfucker showed up and started calling people out.
So, um, yeah, I would tell.
I guess they're good for something.
Yeah, but we don't need to write on tanks and we don't need to like do like
WWE or it used to be WSF.
I remember all the whatever, but we don't have to make it showcase so bad.
But hey, if you take it seriously and you are taking it seriously
and you're dedicated to it, then by all means, let's let's see what you got.
Let's let's go.
Let's go. I would love the fact to have boxing come back into this millennial
world and not all KFC you have.
Yeah, it's like we're not just going to choke you out and kill somebody.
Like like we're not going to tap out.
Let's let's have this one sport.
It's boxing.
It's been around for years.
I really respect the sport of boxing and I was very depressed.
Dude, the fucking.
I don't know what round it was that I saw on Twitter when I woke up this morning.
Oh, I was just like, fuck, man, my heart is broken.
I know.
But you know what?
Diaz fucking did it.
Yeah, he has some scar tissue.
So what he was puffed up a little bit.
He fucking stood there and he took it.
He took it and he landed and I don't know.
I don't know. I guess it all boils down to the points.
And hey, kudos to little Jake and I hope that he really
resigns from YouTuber fucking prankster or whatever
and really takes this into consideration to be a boxer.
Yeah, we'll see.
We'll see. But I'll still root against him every time he fights.
Yes, but.
But I do. I do adore him.
Yeah, good. Thank you.
Thank you for bringing boxing back into the fucking scene.
On that note, let's segue into sneakers because I work down.
OK, so I don't know if you're aware, but Snoop Dogg and Skechers
joined forces, he fucking debuts Skechers sneakers, right?
I like right. OK, so they're like, you know how the bandana print is?
It's on the fucking sneaker.
Shut up. Right.
They're fucking tight.
They're kind of classy.
They come in red, obviously, for trip.
I'm sorry, blood or pyru blue and then they have the black.
And I'm like, I would buy the black.
How much do these run for, bitch?
One hundred and twenty five fucking dollars.
I'm like, is this out of their fucking mind?
I'm like, I can buy a pair of AJ ones for one fifteen
or Air Max 90s for one thirty.
So Skechers and Snoop, you need to get your fucking numbers right,
because that shit ain't happening on a fucking level.
Is never going to be one hundred dollars.
Give me a break. Yeah.
Now. Sorry.
Well, in my eyes, Skechers is never going to be
one hundred dollars worth of fucking shoes.
One pair. Sixty.
I would spend sixty dollars on.
Yeah, I would.
To the little flip.
Bons or whatever.
One twenty five. Get the fuck out, bitch.
Oh, sorry. I don't know if that was loud.
OK, it was loud.
I like to hear the ice because it's hot here.
Clank, clank. Yeah, clank, clank, bitch.
OK, so.
Clank, clank, clank, clank. Yeah, it's so early in the morning.
We're clinking. Girl, it's been a day already.
So I mean, I didn't really drink.
I don't I didn't drink on Friday.
I don't drink on Fridays anymore because I I need a drive
in the evening because I go hang out with vanilla gorilla.
So Saturday, yesterday, I try to have a cocktail in the afternoon.
But my fucking mom has her her family.
I guess they're my family, but they're not.
I don't.
Cousins are coming over and I'm like, well, that's perfect.
I'll be in my room with my air conditioner on high.
So I don't have to hear none of you bitches.
I fucking got away.
Right. So it's a loving thing.
It's a loving word.
It's a loving word that she fucking at least she had fun with her.
I guess her cousins or whatever.
I don't give a fuck.
They're playing cards or what?
Well, no, they were singing Jesus songs to be honest.
And yeah, my mom is not one of those Mahjong people.
I think my aunt is my aunt is here for like the next two days.
And I want to say she probably plays Mahjong, but my mom not so much.
I kind of like Mahjong.
I've never played that.
Well, I had a little app on my phone one day and yeah.
I guess I could learn how to play it that way.
It just seems really complex.
It's like the I guess it's the Asian version of Domino's is.
Yeah, because I can play phones all day long.
I'm like, Domino, bitch.
I can do Domino's. I can do bones.
I cannot do Mahjong. That's too much work.
Yeah, it is. It is.
It takes a lot of mental space.
I could say more on that, but I.
Yeah, we're just say I'm racist and I'm like, no, you know what?
We're both Pacific Islanders.
Yeah, I'm like you're half Asian too.
So people will probably look at us and they're like, no, they're not.
I'm like, yes, bitch, I am.
Yeah, I know.
Well, I want to give people say people think I'm fucking being racist.
So I will leave it alone.
Let's leave it alone.
People say don't ever Spanish.
I don't I don't fucking know.
I'm not I'm because I'm brown.
I don't know.
I'm fucking.
I'm talking Pacific Islander and fucking white.
So get you can call me Charlie Trash or whatever.
I don't know.
Speaking of family, did your sister ever come home or is she still out like mingling?
Oh shit. Mingling.
Thank God she doesn't subscribe to our fucking podcast.
Bitch is on tour.
And this little dog, I feel so bad.
But I I'm actually never came home from like two weeks ago.
No, she's coming home.
I'm like, you know what?
She's living her life.
You fucking do that shit, bitch.
I was like, live your life and I'm going to be good.
But I found out that like she's talking mad shit about me to my family.
And it's like my.
Yeah, because she's trying to put the spotlight on me when the spotlight
should be on her and it's like, OK, yeah.
No, no, yeah.
It's pretty fucking shitty, but I'm not going to let the little dog die.
I have a soul. Right.
So animals over people.
But that's just me. That's me, too.
I was like, well, I this little dog doesn't deserve to die
because of your negligence.
Is your so is she is her dog with at your place or you're going back and forth?
No, I'm going back and forth every day.
I go and I was like, why give you two hundred bucks?
Oh, two hundred dollars. Yay.
You know what?
I can't get my fucking back, though, bitch.
I'm all about my time.
Speaking of fucking time.
OK, you finish your story and then when you're my story is finished,
I'm just done.
OK, because I keep cutting you off.
So I don't go to the doctor often.
The last time I went to the doctor was two years ago to get my blood.
All I want is blood work.
So it's a marker for me, right?
OK, so I find a doctor at Peer since I moved back home.
I finally found one that I guess I'm going to like.
So I'm like, I just need my blood work done.
I need a physical. I need to see where I'm at.
She's like, OK, I'm going to send you to the lab core and I'm like lab
core because I've only ever gone to quest diagnostics.
I don't know what blood blood or I guess what lab you guys have up there.
But we are what's.
You know, quest that's where I normally go.
I've only ever gone to quest diagnostics when it comes to getting blood work.
And like, yeah, so she's like, I'm going to send you to lab core.
And I'm like, that should have been a fucking red or a red flag right there.
I'm like, all right.
So none of their fucking lab corps open up.
The earliest they open is seven.
That's a problem.
I start work at six.
Quest diagnostics, at least the three locations,
in Huntington Beach, they open up at five a.m.
So I'm like, I could knock this out before work if I was living down there.
So I'm like, I will go on Saturday when you open at nine, which was yesterday.
I get there at eight forty five.
Why was the line almost 100 people deep?
I am. Oh my God, like a DMV line.
I'm not exaggerating.
So I'm standing at the front of the line.
I thought it was the back of the line.
And they're like, you're here.
To get lab work. I'm like, yes, one of the people in line.
They're like, you have to go around back because this is the front of the line.
I'm like, oh, OK, girl, I fucking get to the thing.
And I hook, I hook around the building to get to the end.
And I look at I'm like, Jesus, fuck, what the fuck?
Everybody working at me like I'm fucking crazy.
It's eight forty five in the morning.
There's like almost 100 people.
I would say I'm guesstimating close to 90.
OK, I get to the back of the line.
I'm like, you know what?
Let me get up.
Get to the back of the line. I'm like, you know what?
Let me get on their website for a fucking appointment.
So I look for an appointment.
The earliest they have for a Saturday appointment is fucking 9 a.m.
I'm sorry, September 9th.
I'm like fucking.
So I email my doctor who I haven't seen because she's like, you need to go to.
You need to get your lab work done at least 48 hours in advance.
My my physical was supposed to be this coming Tuesday.
You need to get done 48 hours in advance.
So we have the results by the time you show up for your appointment.
So I fucking emailed her.
I'm like, I'm not standing in this fucking line because that's a waste of time.
And you're going to have to book me out after September 9th for my fucking physical.
Yikes.
California sucks sometimes.
Well, yeah.
And then they fill out the questionnaire.
The questionnaire range from your average questions.
Like, do you exercise, do you drink like eight glasses of water a day?
Do you feel like you're overweight?
Do you know what they really say?
Yes.
And then it says, do you have guns in the house?
And I'm like, so I'm like, I just like I hit all the questions.
Like if you when they're looking at this, I already I already know what that fucking survey
like they want all your answers to be in the first fucking column.
If it deviates from the first.
They have issues.
So I just fucking hit the first fucking column.
And at the top of my fucking survey, I put in all caps.
This is ridiculous with three exclamation marks.
Of course you would put that.
Yeah.
And then I had other questions like, do you have children in the house, which I don't.
So I left that.
You have guns in the house.
Do you have milk in the house?
That's not fucking spoiled.
Children stressed.
Do they do their homework?
I'm I'm those type of questions.
And I'm just like, what the fuck?
I'm like, I miss Orange County.
I don't know. LA County is like totally fucked.
Yeah. Fuck.
Fuck.
L.A. County. That's no.
Or I don't know.
But I was just getting there, though.
Everything is like just.
No.
And I I'm so glad that I just fucking packed up my shit and moved north.
I hated it, but it's it's it's nice.
You got to thank your mom, but then you don't got to thank your mom.
Yeah, I'm just like, yeah.
Fuck, fuck that shit.
I'm so glad.
Fuck, I fuck all you.
My family talking about my family.
Right.
It's just done.
And when I came up north, it.
I didn't know what I was doing, but hey.
So how long were you up in Oregon before?
How long were you living there before you found the house that you bought?
I was living here for about two years.
So you were renting an apartment then or you were?
No, I was.
I was renting what they call a duplex and.
Oh, a condo.
OK, I guess it was just kind of and they were the lady was like, don't worry.
Your neighbor is deaf, so you can do what you want.
And I was like, OK, but I'm sure she can feel the vibrations
of all my speakers of my music.
But it was nice.
It was it was cool.
I.
I mean, hey, who doesn't want a three bedroom, two bathroom,
fucking place for 900 bucks a month?
I do.
And it was nice.
It was in the same city that you moved.
Are you about your house?
And are. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah.
And then I moved up the world and I bought a house and I fucking went.
We see. We moving on up.
Moving on up to the east side.
North. Yeah. No.
It's east, actually.
I don't know. OK.
But anyways, I bought a house and I was like, this house really?
I'm fucking buying it and I fucking bought it.
And I've been in the mortgage industry forever.
Oh, did you get the Saturday off that I'm up there?
Did you do your. Oh, my God, I'm still fucking.
I'm. Nicola and dining this dude. I'm like, are you serious?
Like, stop. He's like, I'm training you.
You can't you can't do this.
I'm here for two and a half weeks and blah, blah, blah.
Well, I guess next week you're just going to have to make sure that you're up.
I was like, OK, so, you know what?
If I'm not off that day.
Because I. You'll just make it or do another Saturday or like work next Saturday.
Yeah, and he's like, no, but you you're you're in legit training and this and that.
And you have to do these schedules and all this.
Do the schedule on Friday.
I was like, I don't know.
But this is I really need that Saturday off.
And I'm like, OK, fuck, if I don't fucking get it.
You can like either a.
Go with me to work and just take my car and just venture around.
No, I'll just no, I'll just fucking hang out.
You know what I was going to say?
There's a brewery in in your city that I found.
And I'm like, I will just hang out there.
Girl, one thousand percent.
There's so many breweries.
I'm sorry. And your city is fucking small.
I looked it up and I'm like, it looks like it's the size of Dwardy.
You I can't wait until you get here like on Friday night.
So I can just fucking show you like, hey, dude,
the womb. Let's do this.
What time you get off work?
How long is it?
What time do you actually walk through the door at your house?
I walk out at 6 a.m.
No, I mean, what time do you come home?
I'm sorry. Oh, I come home around.
Five. OK, so I'll be in port or I'll be puttin around Portland and by puttin,
I mean staggering because I'll be drunk.
I'll be drunk.
Oh, there's so many little bars and breweries here.
You could. Yeah, no, but I'm going to I'm going to do Portland,
Portland, Portland, like downtown Portland when I arrive.
And then I will Uber to your, I guess, your house.
Yes. And then from there,
let's go to the grocery store and pick some food up.
Yeah, for sure. OK.
That way I can just pay for everything and then I'll be all set.
I'll be home on Friday by fucking five.
All right, all right, perfect. So I'll I'll I think it's unless I get
stuck behind tractors.
OK, Bobby Boucher, I know.
Waterboy, what the fuck?
It's fucking crazy here.
I fucking I'm still getting used to actually have an actual freeway or it's like too late.
No, girl.
It's not freeways.
It's a it's a highway.
And God forbid you say.
Oh, I went on the ninety nine to go.
Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no.
It's highway.
OK, so what that being said, Uber will take me from, I guess,
downtown Portland to your house, right?
Oh, fuck yeah.
They'll they fucking know, but just just don't don't say anything.
Don't talk to them.
Just say, hey, no, I'm going to be fucking passed out in the back seat
because I'll be so damn tired from
the two hour the one hour fucking plane ride and then all the alcohol
coursing through my veins.
Fuck yeah.
Fucking snoring real loud in that backseat, bitch.
Well, you got to let me know what type of because we have one liquor store.
But I'm telling you to pick.
Look, just pick up a big handle of vodka.
I don't care which one because I'm going to mix it.
I don't drink vodka straight.
So I will mix that and then like maybe a 12 or a Guinness
because any other beer blows me.
Oh, well.
Well, guess what?
I got what the fuck do they call them?
We have these little fucking things that I go to the breweries
and they growlers or some shit.
Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Yeah, yeah.
I have a fucking good fucking beer that I will I'll I'll fill that up.
So yeah.
OK, so get either what the fuck get like a dark beer like Guinness
or a or a pale pale.
Pale Ale won't blow me.
Oh, well, we'll fill up the growler when you get here then.
Oh, perfect. Even fucking better, bitch.
Or you know what? I'll probably I guess can I travel with a fucking growler from?
No, you can't. I have him.
I already have like fucking 10 of them here, and they just need to be filled up.
So I can go back to the fucking brewery and.
Bitch, and then we'll need to order a pizza because I require a pizza
with extra extra pepperoni. Oh, one thing.
And we got this. I mean, OK, and I want carne asada.
Oh, wait, wait, wait, wait.
Do they have carne asada? Let me just say, I don't know.
I'm from Southern California, so I'm used to like amazing
Mexican food or is it lackluster up there?
Please don't tell me it is. It's fucking bullshit up here.
Oh, god. Damn it.
OK, so we're not doing a soda.
Thank you for telling me. Yeah, please don't.
All right. I guess it's New York.
Steak. I don't get it.
But you know what?
We can have some fucking teriyaki bowls and shit like I fucking I don't know.
I can make that. I can make some mac salad.
I don't know.
Thank you.
We'll just go to the store when I get there.
Yeah. Yeah, for sure.
But the Mexican food here.
It sucks.
I'm so what the fuck?
Oh, well, it's worse than Taco Bell.
I will go to talk about.
I don't even understand why these people.
I mean, I guess this is what it is.
But it it's I don't know.
I'm biased because I I'm from Southern Kelly.
Yeah, I got some good shit going down there.
But up here, I'm like, what the fuck is going on?
I'm like, it's not even Tex-Mex.
And you know, now it's fucking trash.
It's it's fucking horrible.
Horrible.
I'm like, who puts fucking corn in their fucking refried beans?
Like, oh, what the fuck?
I know.
It's fucking disgusting.
And they do these sauteed onions.
Who sauteed the onions for a street taco?
Like, I it's just.
No.
Yeah, I'm like, this is all bad.
It should be on the fucking taco grill.
That's the way you're supposed to do the right.
And you just chop up the onions and the cilantro and you just throw that shit
on there with some radishes or whatever.
No, radishes.
Nasty. That's why we're you're my girl.
I fucking love radishes with fucking Mexican food.
So do I.
And I'm like, where's my fucking rat?
Real quick, are you a corn tortilla or a flour tortilla bitch?
I well, it depends.
If I'm having a burrito for a burrito, well, yeah, because they don't make corn
tortillas, right?
Yeah, when it comes to tacos, corn or flour, corn.
Thank you very fucking much.
That's all I'm going to fucking say.
Fucking warmed up.
That's right, bitch.
On the fucking stove with no goddamn fucking like pot underneath it.
Or the, you know, the old, you know, the old, they, what do they, what do they
call it, the call or whatever the fuck?
I don't know.
I just have the house is almost on fire because my fucking corn tortillas get
burnt. Yes.
Burnt.
Yep.
I want some char on that shit.
I always do on my meat, on my fucking bitch.
Yes.
Oh, fuck.
People don't know.
We need to fucking start a fucking food truck here.
I bet.
No, I would be.
I would be like the movie waiting.
I'd be like fucking Naomi from waiting.
Okay, that's not going to work for me.
Well, we were not going to work.
We'll just hire some people.
Okay.
And then we can just videotape everybody walking.
Yeah, we'll just have a little fucking, you know, I like making fun of people.
So that would be my fucking stick.
I'm like, bitch, I'm the fucking owner.
Let me do this.
So, girl, I swear I had a fucking idea.
I was like, there's all these fucking food trucks in my little town and they
just parked places and I'm just like, okay, I don't know.
And I tried them all and I'm like, this is shit.
And I thought I'm going to make one.
And I'm going to fucking invest in this potato, potato.
That's my fucking name, because guess what?
It's just going to be a fucking baked potato.
And I'm going to put all the toppings on and I'm going to make the
the baked of the loaded potato soup.
I'm going to I'm down for the fucking soup, bitch.
Yes. And I was like, I can make a great fucking loaded potato soup.
And I was just thinking, hey, potatoes.
Needs bacon.
That inventory would be not too bad.
Like these fucking potatoes.
Oh, I know I just have these visions, but we'll see.
Link, clink, clink, clink, clink, clink.
I know.
OK, so.
Oh, I know what I was going to tell you really quick.
Let's segue back to sneakers.
My fucking supervisor, I love him to death there.
I always find a new way to love him even more because he's fucking ridiculous.
This motherfucker shows up in AJ ones last week.
And I'm like, Ivan, are those new AJ ones?
And he's like, no, these are old.
In fact, I've thrown up on them twice.
And I'm like, bitch.
I'm like, if I find or what did I say?
I'm like, I swear to God, I love you.
But that you always find new ways to love you even more.
Every fucking day I show up to work.
I'm like, I fucking love you so much.
He's like, yeah, bitch, I've thrown up on these twice.
These are most definitely not new sneaks.
Not no more.
No, no, bitch.
Shit.
Fuck.
I had a friend asking me if I wanted to buy some AJ ones and I'm a big fan of AJ ones.
And they were purple.
So it was a white, just purple.
And it was like, lame.
I don't I don't want that.
Fine.
What's your favorite color, by the way, because you're I don't know.
I don't even know your I'm a big turquoise color.
I'm or a baby blue.
I'm because I'm sorry.
But I'm a.
I'm a baby blue.
Oh, yeah.
I think I think I think Tart like North Carolina Tar Heels from Michael Jordan.
I like baby blue.
But I I'm a big turquoise baby blue.
I do like some red because sometimes I try to right like mix match my my shoe.
I'm one of those.
I like my shoes to match my purse, match my fucking whatever.
But yeah, and I was like purple.
There's just white.
Yeah, I was like, nah, and there's just the Nike sign was just purple.
And it was like, I don't got too much purple gear to wear.
But I have a black.
Yeah, we're a lot of black and white.
I was like.
Nah, nah, I ain't doing this for a hundred bucks.
Fuck the fuck off.
I wish you wore my size because I would bring some shoes up for you.
Oh, I see.
I wish you were a what size for women.
I'm seven and a half women.
Yeah, you're like you're like, yeah, I don't know.
And it's weird.
Don't work.
It's weird because when I was growing up, my sisters used to laugh at me and said,
I could ski without.
And I had big feet and shit.
But you do not have big feet.
I wear an eight and a half and sneakers.
I wear a women's nine because I need I need that extra half inch or I guess
half size because I wear the sneaker or god damn it.
I wear athletic socks.
I don't wear that thin socks.
Yeah, I fucking hate thin socks that the chicks wear.
I wear legit athletic socks that I guess are guy socks like copperware.
Yeah, the yeah.
Amazon bitch.
You know what I'm talking about.
I'm fucking out those two.
They are fucking they are so fucking good.
But I have to buy a size up to make our for athletic socks since that's all I've ever worn.
Yeah, I don't fucking yeah.
I do the same things.
But like I was just fucking damn it.
My feet like why are they so small all of a sudden?
No, I think my feet are just big.
I don't know.
Oh, my daughter wears no, my daughter wears an eight.
So like even they're even my my sneaker.
But she she says that my sneakers look weird on her feet.
And I'm like, no, but she wears Reebok.
She likes to wear Reeboks and Puma.
She's not a Nike person.
Like like he's for like, I guess for running shoes.
But like, like, I guess streetwear, she wears Reeboks and Puma's.
Oh, I like old school Adidas, like the shell toes and the shell.
Called shell toes.
I think yeah.
But like all their new stuff and fuck the Yeezy's.
Those things look ridiculous.
But like all like their shit that you can wear in the gym for Adidas,
they don't fit right.
Like they're extra wide.
Even and I'm talking about the women's ones.
Like I guess I have a narrow foot.
I don't know. But Nike has always fit me perfect.
So oh, yeah, I love Nike.
I love, um, well, my AJ's.
I'm just always doing AJ's.
I don't even give a shit if it fucking hurts my foot.
It looks that's where I'm going with this because, um, I normally I
I guess if I need a fit, if I want to wear the shoe and, um, walking it
and like being it all day or whatever, it needs to be the men's seven and a half.
But that's a rare fucking size.
And it's like only one or two are available, even on the fucking website.
Yeah.
But like, so I normally just buy the boys seven, which is the biggest
size that's available.
So it's like it's really fucking tight.
So if I need to be in that shoe all day, it's not going to happen.
Like if I'm going to be sitting at work, I can do it.
Yeah, I know.
And you're at the top of your foot just starts.
You're saying, you know, so I'm going to be out all day or if I'm going out
or actually doing shit, I'm like, I can't wear my shoes.
Like, can I just take my shoes off for a minute?
Let my boy.
Yeah.
My little kid, AJ, one is what I call him.
Yeah.
Oh my gosh.
Yeah.
I can't wait till you come up here and you see all my shoes.
Yeah.
Um, your whole genetic.
Yeah.
How are you with the heels?
Oh, I fucking hate heels.
I do too.
They're only good for the bedroom.
And you know what?
I got rid of all them.
I'm like, um, I will just buy a new pair when the time comes.
Yeah.
And you know, like when they're up in the air and you're on your back, that's about it.
Yeah, there it is.
And then the guy can take it off and that's all good.
But, um, it's like, I don't know.
I.
I like wonky ankles.
I guess.
I don't know.
No, but then like all the women, I mean, kudos to the women who do wear heels all day,
but your backs are fucked up a and B your feet are hammer time fucking knocked up.
Like they're all fucking jacked up.
I like to look at my feet and my feet are kind of pretty.
So I like to keep them looking like that.
And the way I wear it or the way you make that happen is you don't wear fucking heels every day.
Thank you.
Thank you. My feet are fucking amazing.
And you know what?
I fucking look at that.
You know, my daddy used to say, you have Flintstone feet and that's okay because all my toes just.
They're like Flintstone feet, but.
They're great.
They're beautiful.
Yeah, but you know how like your toe goes in?
You know how like some women's big toe goes in because they wear their fucking heels?
You know what I'm talking about, right?
Exactly.
I have Flintstone feet because I wear.
That's not your foot is not supposed to look fucking jacked up.
Stop wearing those fucking shoes, bitch.
Yep.
And I don't give a shit.
I could pick up shit with my foot on the floor.
If I have a fucking towel or something, I'm picking up with my feet.
I don't give a fuck.
Okay.
Well, I'm not that far advanced.
I guess I need to get on that.
But my feet are fucking pretty.
They may be Flintstone feet, but they're painted pretty.
And they're clean.
They don't sweat.
I fucking.
You know what?
I'm not trying to do a foot date with you.
I don't know what the fuck is going on, but I didn't need to know that, but I'm glad I do.
Yeah.
You know what?
When we get the hot stuff.
Women's feet sweat then?
Or what are you trying to tell me?
I didn't know that.
Well, that's some dude that I dated and he used to tell me,
Oh, your feet are so pretty because the other girl I was with has sweaty nasty feet.
And I'm like, I know.
And I'm like, well, who the fuck am I being with at this point?
Like if you wait, how do you get sweaty nasty feet though?
Like you don't take your socks and shoes off when you get.
Yeah, you don't shower.
You don't fucking I don't fucking know.
I'm sorry.
I am so disgusted right now.
Yeah.
And it was a chick, not a dude.
It was a chick that and the guy told me that.
Yeah.
Well, he has some sweaty nasty feet and I'm like, nasty.
I was like, well, what did you do for a living?
What did she he's like, nothing.
That's even worse.
Oh my God.
I can see if she was like maybe a garbage.
Yeah.
A trash man or some shit like that are working out
in the fucking yard or she had to put on those little fucking
still toe boots or whatever.
I don't know.
Maybe she has some little shitty feet, but I don't know.
Fuck.
Yeah, I'm going to need to Google that shit.
Like how do people get ill?
Maybe I don't I don't want to Google that because images will come up.
Don't even Google it.
Better than me.
How about that?
All I know is my feet are pretty.
I mean, they may even look like Flintstone feet.
Like my dad said, but they're cute.
That's right, but they're clean.
I don't have no bunions.
I don't have never had that issue.
Thank God.
Yeah, because I don't wear heels and walk in them.
Yeah, we're not like Barbie with what?
Well, we're flat feet.
Yeah, I don't really I guess I have an arch, but I don't really have an arch
because I've seen flat footed people.
My best best friend other than you Darcy,
she has a fucking arch for days.
And I'm like, how the fuck do you walk on your feet?
Like her arch is like fucking like intense.
And she's like, but she's really good at ballet, too.
So I guess that comes in hand with I do and be on your toes all day.
I don't know.
She used to do ballet, so I'm assuming that how to do doctor in to her insane arch.
Oh, I'm like, that just looks painful, bitch.
I'm just like, I'm going to put on my slip.
I'm going to put on my slip.
I'm done.
Like it is.
It is what it is.
I'm flat footed.
Like, oh, I'm not flat.
I do have a.
Yeah, I know what you're saying.
I have a slight arch, but it's not nothing like.
Yeah.
All right, girl, I think we need to.
Oh, let's wrap this up.
What's your rant for the week?
Oh my gosh, I really said my rant.
My rant was I fucking hate Jake Paul, but I'm sure you will.
I hate him, too.
But I do have to go ahead and go.
No, I was going to say, I have to agree with you that you you thanked him.
And I guess his stupid brother for bringing boxing back into the spotlight for to make
it more mainstream again.
So I am thankful on that note.
Yes, even though it's a rant.
Yes.
I'm just a poor sport.
I bet it against him and I fucking lost.
So I'm a poor sport.
Oh, excuse me.
Okay.
So your other rant or do you have another rant?
No, I was just a poor sport.
I was just I'm really like, you're not a poor sport.
You're heartbroken like me because we both love ideas.
No, no.
Don't bounce my rat.
I just hate it.
I hate you.
I hate you two versus right.
Shit.
Okay.
So my rant, I was taking a walk yesterday and I'm fucking kind of old, not really.
But I my rant is I walk on the sidewalk because it's called a sidewalk.
I cannot stand when people on their motherfucking bikes are on the side walk with me.
This bitch comes up behind me.
He's like, excuse me.
And I'm just like, I'm like, okay.
And I just want to fucking take a bat and fucking take it to the fucking bike and knock
her off the bike.
I'm like, this is a sidewalk.
It's not a side bike.
Sidewalk.
I'm like, God damn it.
Wait.
I want to dovetail off your rant because now I got a legit rant.
And like, I fucking hate merging.
When you merge, we can go all day long about merging here in SoCal.
You used to live in SoCal.
Oh, I, I, I do.
So rent and I will end.
I will end that.
Oh, no.
Well, you know, then you're going to feel my pain.
It's kind of like, do you speed up to get into the fucking flow of traffic?
Okay.
Or do you slow down and just kind of like when I'll speed up.
You were here in SoCal for a long fucking time.
Why do people in Southern California, when you are getting onto the fucking freeway,
when you're trying to merge from an on ramp to the freeway, why do people slow the fuck down?
That's when you're supposed to accelerate.
And then when you get off the motherfucking freeway on the off ramp, why do people fucking speed up?
That's when you're supposed to slow down because you're going to be coming to a motherfucking stop
at the end of the off ramp.
Yeah, get off so slowly.
Speed up on the on ramp, merge, stop fucking making or causing the bottleneck, and then you slow down
on the off ramp, bitch.
It's not that fucking hard.
It's common sense.
Hello.
Okay.
I don't think anybody has common sense.
So that's another rant that I'm fucking sick and fucking tired of people not knowing how to merge.
Thank you, bitch.
Cling, cling.
All right.
On that note, I am Baruch Medusa and you are a pavmona bullets.
That's right, bitch.
And thank you for listening to Top Shelf Hygienx.
We see you next week.
We bid you adieu.
Bye.
What up, bitch?
What did you do?
Oh, by the way, we are both on the same page.
Oh, by the way, we are both fucked up right now.
And I said, you know what?
Today is a good day to record a podcast.
Yeah, you just woke me up from my booze snooze.
So what are best friends for that fucking right bitch?
So booze snooze, what were you boozing on before you snoozed out?
Um, well, for breakfast, I had some SoCo.
And then you went to work.
Yeah.
Well, yeah.
And then for lunch, fuck, where did I drink for lunch?
I don't know if I could maybe some more SoCo.
And now I'm laughing because I'm totally fucked up.
But now I'm drinking some moonshine inside of a bitch.
This is quite tasty.
Wait, what do you, oh, the moonshine, did you mix it with the coconut water?
Yes.
And it's fucking a mermaid.
So you're hydrating and libating at the same time.
I know.
I got to make it down the stairs to cook the kids dinner.
You know what?
Your kids are grown.
They can make their own fucking.
I know.
Make your own cuppa noodle.
That's right, bitch.
Okay.
So you know where I'm going with this.
I had Don Julio 1942 at a bar earlier.
And that's why I'm like, we need to record this shit.
So I've never had Don Julio 1942 and all today's rappers rave about it.
Well, you know what?
Today's rappers are fucking trash because they are millennials.
They are not almost 50 like myself and you're 43.
So you're not you're not anywhere close to being 50.
But I will tell you this.
Don Julio 70 is where you need to be or higher on the fucking chart.
So fuck Don Julio 1940 fucking to
I would rather have normal tresp generation's or Don Julio or any fucking
reposado because that's what it fucking tastes like.
Like why the fuck is this so special?
It's not extra filtered or filtered.
No, it's not.
It's trash, straight trash.
Oh, fuck.
All right.
Always on the calm.
Roll it out to the curb.
That's right.
Roll it to the curb.
Goodbye.
Never again.
So now I'm having I'm at home hydrating because I'm going to try and make leg day at the gym tomorrow.
I don't think it's going to happen, but cherry Bundy with like three shots of vodka.
Sounds great.
You know, oh my gosh.
And hydrate the way you do because that's what we do.
That's right.
On a Saturday.
In the afternoon.
Good afternoon.
Jay bitch.
What the fucking day?
I think I slept half the day away.
It's fucking like six.
Good for you because you work the craziest fucking shift.
So I'm glad you slept the whole day.
Yeah.
Well, actually I didn't.
I took the kids to the goddamn fair.
Oh God.
So is that the equivalent of the LA County Fair at Pomona?
Fuck no.
It's like the pinky finger of the fucking LA County Fair of Pomona.
I just remember when you told me like back in the day when I guess when you were when you were
living in Pomona and you're like my boss gave me like a gift card for what was it called?
John's Incredible Pizza Place.
Oh yeah.
What's that place fucking called?
John's Incredible Pizza.
Yeah.
Okay.
And you're like that's more like um so I'm sorry it's uh Pomona Bullets fucking Incredible Nightmare.
Yeah.
Fuck yeah it was.
She's like it was not Incredible Pizza Place.
You're like it's an incredible nightmare.
Like what the fuck and I'm like I never want to be there.
All I know is Chuck E. Cheese.
Chuck E. Cheese had great pizza because my daughter was was born in 19 in the
early 1990s and um yeah.
I don't know what to fucking tell you.
It was incredibly fucking retarded and there was nothing incredible about the pizza and it was
kind of a bitch.
It was like I don't know.
It was a fucking child daycare on fucking crack.
It there was a bowling alley miniature golf.
It was just huge.
Oh my god.
I went okay well I'm glad that.
Oh I thought it was just like a playland or whatever the ball pit like they had a fucking
and the tubes like the slides or whatever like Chuck E. Cheese had.
No they had that and some and some and some more.
It was just too many fucking prats running around.
I don't know.
I have kids but I hate kids.
Like please leave your kids at home if they're gonna fucking cry.
Just like shit I'm trying to have a fucking dinner.
I don't need your fucking kids screaming and crying.
I'm just trying to use this gift card and max it out.
Yeah for sure.
I was like fuck my life.
Like I just.
So fucking so done with it.
These are the moments you're gonna cherish.
No fuck no these are the moments.
No no no no.
That's why I got my tubes tied.
Yeah I know I got mine burnt seared.
No I want to pull out my fucking uterus.
You got yours burnt seared.
Did you get a reverse seared?
No there's no way doing that.
I'm not playing the whole clamp well done bitch.
Yeah fuck that.
I ain't pro creating no more fucking tards like no.
Oh dear god.
Anyways you have Amazon Prime right?
Oh fuck yeah.
Okay have you watched Goliath with Billy Bob Thornton?
No.
Okay I watched it like there's four seasons.
I watched it two years ago and I'm doing a rewatch.
It is a phenomenal fucking show and all I'm gonna say about Billy Bob Thornton is I love him as a.
As what?
Sling blade?
Well yeah no yeah yes a sling blade and I love him as a functioning alcoholic.
That's the only character he can play in my eyes and he plays it so fucking well so.
I'm like I'll be up there next weekend but I'm up there for a very short time so like if we can
sneak in one episode and you'll see and you're like oh I'm fucking hooked you can watch four
seasons and this fucking shit is ridiculous like he's a functioning alcoholic but he's a
lawyer and he's so fucking bored because he's so fucking smart as a lawyer is he's just like I'm
just gonna fuck off all the time and then I'll show up to court.
That's the way I see it.
But there's so there's so many dimensions with the characters in the fourth seasons
and I'm on the second season I'm watching it right now it's on mute but I'm just like oh my
fucking god this fucking all of these people should have won awards and I don't watch the award
shows because they're trash just like Don Julio or 1942.
Get in the trash bin with Don Julio.
1942. 1942. Not Don Julio 70.
What so what else did you do today besides take a boost news?
I took the kids to the fair and like I said.
Yeah so my daughter is your daughter trying to like already like be like I don't want to do this
because I'm getting ready to leave for college and yeah I'm moving out.
No actually she wanted to go so usually my kids are just like I didn't nobody wanted to go I didn't
want to go my son didn't want to go my daughter wanted to go and reason being was the original
actor who wore the Michelangelo Ninja Turtles suit in the Ninja Turtles movie back in the 90s
was going to be there with the fucking turtle van he has a van it's all decked out.
And she wanted to she wanted to take a picture with them she wanted to see him and he was actually
going to be in the suit and I was like there's no way this guy's going to be in a fucking suit.
Wait hold up was this the guy that you drew for the painting.
Yeah okay that's what I thought.
Yeah and my daughter just she loves Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles and I it's my fault because I used
to like it and I kind of told them my kids you want to watch some real fucking shit this is what
you watch. Howard the Duck and Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. Well Howard the Duck god damn it Howard the Duck.
Fuck I know well this is this is this is real shit this is what real people watch.
Okay so good news when I get up there next weekend it's supposed to be like maybe 15 to 20
degrees cooler than it is today up there. Oh thank goodness I don't know what happens.
Everybody over here you watch this fucking news I'm not a big news person I don't I'm not either
because my mom watches it 24 fucking seven. I think all like old people do they think they do just
because they have nothing else better to do that or the Jesus channel. Yeah just god yeah my mom did
the same fucking shit she told me do you watch uh she says this name do you ever watch him?
I said no I go why would I I go why what what is he is he a news reporter what the fuck is he
and she's like oh no he's a pastor like where the fuck would I watch that shit. My mom watches all
that fucking shit and you know what's funny when I used to live in HB and I would drive down the
405 to Irvine to work. The Trinity Broadcasting Network I don't know if you remember or if you
ever watched the TV. Oh yes really grand and all them. Well that place was alive and thriving
off the 405 South on the right side. Yeah and then the granddaughter claimed that somebody
sexually molested her or I guess sexually assaulted her right. I want to in that context and
I guess the two I don't know what the fucking husband and wife's name was but they denied it
and then all of a sudden it came out and that place shut down and I'm like oh well was that the
Crystal Cathedral shit. No no oh my god I've been there. That's in orange but the TBN is off the 405
South on the right side before Irvine so I don't know what that city is right there but
yeah I don't know Orange County's fucking white trash but guess what I'll move down there I'll
move back down there eventually because of tax purposes. Oh yeah and you know there's clean
air down there. Yeah I'm like in the 626 because it's all fucking dirt and fucking smog.
Yeah I don't even smoke and have emphysema. That's right you know what else is trashed?
Don Julio 1942. That's all you need to know. Thank you for saving me $30 for a shot for a stupid
fucking shot. Where's your jetpack? Clink clink. He's on the curb with the trash. Oh shit. Okay.
Well trash day's coming around so I'm gonna get up. I'm gonna wait what? It's Saturday he's on the curb.
He's sitting on the curb. Your Islander family are they in Maui? No thank God. I just saw that
Maui's on fire I'm like okay I don't know how the wildfires happen but that's fucking sad A and B.
I don't know I'm supposed to go there in November so. Well fuck Maui. Okay yes I'm Islander and my
family were Kauai and the big island. Okay so not trying to brag but you know we're from the
best island out there but and the big island I have family on the big island too and okay. But
Maui's so well actually all the islands are tourist go-tos and it's just I feel bad but check it out.
We all know because well like me and my family we all know like what the fuck there's volcanoes.
Typically a fucking volcano shut. Like Jesus that's why we have fucking boats that's why we're
surrounded by water like we hear rumbling like get the fuck off the island ASAP and it rumbles for
two weeks prior so here's where I'm going with this so like I read the report like I guess the
Maui the government system with the I guess the bells and whistles like they're supposed to
alert everybody you know what I'm talking about like yeah in every day like what every week they have
like like the stupid fucking sirens because they're testing it in case of a tsunami I'm like
there will never be a tsunami and HB and if there is thank god please take me I don't want to be
after the fact because then I have to rebuild yeah but um I guess that shit didn't sound off
in Maui and I'm just like well I don't want to be I don't want to be a doomsday scroller or
whatever the negative term is but I'm like of course it didn't because it's fucking how it's
Maui and the government's only gonna do something if a natural disaster happens and obviously now
they will which is so fucking sad but here we are in 2023 so whatever hopefully I'm just hoping
your family's okay yeah I hope that's where I'm going with this I'm sorry no thank you thank you
yeah they're they're safe good but um I do feel bad but it feels bad too it's just like the entire
fucking island's burnt down yeah and I think the tourists are even more fucking sad we're gonna
rebuild you're not gonna rebuild an island bitch this is this is what happens this is mother nature
cleansing the population um yeah it's called natural selection yeah this is like oh my god my
favorite hotel burnt down like shut the fuck up second when I go in November my hostel because I
stay at hostel so the hostel better be open or I won't I will go to Quay rebuild the house I will
totally rebuild the hostel I guess or help build it whatever I don't know we'll see what happens
you got you got to go to Quay I got a cottage my family has a Airbnb cottage um a compound with um
six little cottages and it's pretty fucking awesome so quote god I don't know my g my geography
the geography is Kwawi on Maui or the main island no it's a it's a separate island it's another island
oh yeah all right well I maybe we mean you should go there and out okay so we can figure it out
we'll figure it out in the next couple years okay cool yeah
geez my god geez I know my eyes keep watering
oh my gosh what's going on so I went so yesterday I went to a concert well where it's music in the
park that's what okay that's what they call it so I'm literally about a mile from the Willamette
River okay so there's this park and it's called the Riverfront Park and they do music in the park in
the summers um on Fridays so yesterday was journey it's a cover band but I would hope so
but dude the fucking the the the the singer he's fucking Asian just like it's like the real deal
and he fucking can't say really yes and it was like holy fuck stop believe it okay so um are they
gonna be there next Friday when I'm sure next Friday I believe is 80s okay well guess what you're
gonna bring your fucking mind oh and by the way I'm staring at the box that I need to have
fucking mail out I need to mail out a fucking box to you with all my fucking shit because you know
I'm not fucking boarding a plane with my fucking shit this is how Baroque Medusa travels if you're
gonna travel and you're only gonna be there for like a solid 36 hours of partying you don't board
with your fucking shit you send your shit up there a week prior like your clothes your fuck yeah
yeah so I'm gonna do Monday because I've slacked off for the last week oh my gosh I will send it
out on Monday so that way I can just board the plane with my purse and like I guess my back camp
no no not even a backpack I'm gonna board with like my shampoo uh three ounce you know I'm talking
about the shampoo oh yeah but it's gonna be with vodka and tequila so I'm gonna put in my fucking
coffee I'm just asked for a coffee when I'm in the fucking plane yeah and then you can add your creamer
after the fact and by creamer I mean more tequila or vodka
tea
hey hey hey that clink clink clink clink bitch this is my fucking this is my my mouth spray
hey that bonacca shit oh shit you know what I'm sure kids these days don't know what bonacca is
really god damn it I need to fucking watch what I say let me get by the way I told the kids at
I'm like, have you heard the song groove is in the groove is in the heart?
They're like, no, I'm like, if you hear it, you would know what I'm fucking talking about.
But my girl Pomona Bullets thought it fucking time until she fuck.
I finally got her the fucking karaoke mic.
She's like, I thought it was roses in the book.
They're like, what?
I'm like, roses.
What roses in the book?
And they're like, we don't know what you're talking about.
I'm like, you know what?
Well, if you hear groove is in the heart, you'll be like, oh, yeah, I know what the fuck you're talking about.
You dumb bitch.
And I'm like, yeah, well, guess what, dumb bitch?
That's what I'm fucking talking about.
Bitch, it's roses in the park.
It's called bullshit in the trash.
And by bullshit in the trash, I mean, Don Julio 1942 is trash.
So there's not a song where you just sang the wrong lyrics, but they fit.
You can't recall one song where you're like, I know I can recall many songs,
but I don't remember what I made up for those songs.
But roses in the park is the best fucking thing I can ever remember.
And I will never forget that when I have all timers or dementia.
Or like, I need your tourist 45 long to fuck me in the head because I'm not going to have anybody take care of me at the end of the day.
Girl, I got you.
You can see my optional pick what everyone you want.
And we can sleep with our little baby under our pillow.
And the next time we shit our fucking diaper, 38 snub nose, just like, let's go.
Yeah, because I used to think I'm going to use my 22.
No, no, no, because I don't I don't need to you won't will not.
It's not going to do the job.
It's going to be two and I will leave.
But here's the thing about the 22s, though, I'm sure you I'm sure you've watched.
Oh, your dad's a retired homicide detective.
Yeah, girl.
I'm a fucking marine.
And I'm sure.
You're well aware. You probably watched many of forensic files or CSI, whatever the fuck.
Oh yeah, crime, whatever the 22.
The episodes I've watched are research.
The 22 does not exit your fucking brain.
Yeah, or the dome.
If you if you get shot in the head with the 22, it doesn't exit your fucking dome.
So where am I trying to go?
So it'll just be lodged in your brain and it'll just travel.
But there's no way there's when it comes to forensics, like they can't pinpoint it at least 15 years ago.
I don't know about now, but there's something where the 22, like they can't prove it in court at least 15 to 20 years ago.
I could be wrong.
You know, times have fucking changed.
Shit.
You know, with a I and you know what is so fucking hilarious.
When I worked for the city of Long Beach, when I first started working there in 20 fucking 14, I still cannot wrap my head around 3D printers.
You know what those are?
Yeah, I print a fucking house.
You can print like a phone.
You can print whatever the fuck.
I cannot wrap my head around 3D printers.
And I still to this day, I'm not sure if I'm going to be able to print a phone.
To this day, because you're older, but you're not as old as me.
Pupona bullets.
So I grew up loving and understanding, I guess, the AI quote unquote version of Twilight Zone.
Yeah, yeah, that shit, right?
Yeah, yeah.
I totally understand AI in that context.
But like today's AI, I'm just like, dude, I'm so glad I'm about to be 50.
I'm fucking about to bow out and be dead in about another third.
I'll be dead in 30 years because I ain't gonna go more than 30 years.
Let's go there.
Shit, I'm just like all these like my youngest nephew and like anybody who's younger, like, I guess your younger son.
God bless them.
They're gonna have to go through a lot of fucking shit.
They fucking know, as a matter of fact, that 3D printing shit.
I heard that they, they make, they can do, they make guns and shit with that.
No, they can make anything and everything.
Like I'm pretty sure they can make like babies and my daughter actually came home from school one day and she, she's trying to play a joke on me because I'm constantly pranking her.
So I deserve it.
And she's not good at doing pranks or jokes. She tries and I always catch them like fuck thanks all for that shit.
But she comes and she has some Oreos.
And she's like, would you like an Oreo?
I was sure. So I grab like an idiot. I grabbed the first Oreo and the little tray.
It looks like a motherfucking Oreo. I swear. I swear. And I try to bite it and I'm like, almost chipped the tooth.
And I'm like, you know what? If I broke a fucking tooth, I would have knocked her out.
I'm like, oh God, I'm paying for my dental bill bitch.
Yeah. I'm like, what the fuck? And she goes, haha, it's a 3D printer Oreo.
It looked exactly like a fucking Oreo.
I mean, now that I think about it, I mean, it didn't crumble or anything. And it was, you know, but it was just a perfect fucking Oreo.
It looked just like it. I don't know how the fuck they did it. I don't know.
Yeah, it's crazy.
Fucking nuts. And my son has, well, he had, I don't, I don't think it works anymore. I don't know what the fuck happened, but he had one of those virtual reality things.
Shit. That was crazy. Have you watched the movie X, my Kena?
Yes. Okay. So everybody thought I was crazy because I fucking love that movie. I don't know if you like that movie. I love that movie because I'm like, this is where the human race is going. Yeah.
And they're like, you're fucking wrong. I'm like, oh no, it's been predicted since like the Twilight fucking zone. Like, have you watched the Twilight zone?
And we are so fucking there right now. Like, like that was the precipice. If I'm using the right fucking word.
The precipice. And like, I'm just like, you know what? I'm glad I'm going to be 50 and I'm going to bow out soon because I can, I can no longer do this shit.
So according to my daughter, boomer's going to boom mom. Yeah, I'm a fucking boomer and I'm going to fucking boom bitch.
I'm going to bow out in a little bit and kudos to you. You try to fucking make it in this fucking bullshit.
Yeah. Well, I guess what? I can read a map. I don't need. I don't need fucking Siri to tell me where to go.
I can read a fucking map.
I can write in cursive boomers gonna bloom boomers going to be dirty and not dirty, but they're I guess I don't know the way they the way that people say boomers are going to boom though.
Like they think of it negatively and I'm just like, okay, well, once we once the boomers die off and you have the millennials and everybody else.
Well, good luck to you guys. I don't have to be here for this shit. So I'm already falling out.
I know. I know what's going to happen. Enjoy your Don Julio 1942. I'm going to take my Don Julio 1970 and bow out.
How about that?
About that. Oh shit. Hey, you know, I was playing Trivial Pursuit with my kids the other day and I have an old. Oh, is that game still around?
Fuck no. It's old. I had to blow off the dust like it was an ancient art of stuff. You actually still have the card game or whatever. Yeah. Yeah.
Oh, I think I love you more.
So what questions were in there? There are probably no like current day questions. They're probably no. Yeah, exactly. So my dad, I guess it was his game.
He just decided, hey, you want this game? I'm like, fuck.
He's like, it's a kid because the little cheese.
Oh, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So I took the game. I don't know. So we're playing games because sometimes in Oregon, we get the power outages because it's snowing a tree falls on a power line or whatever.
But it's not be 106 degrees or 115 degrees like in SoCal and they want to regulate your fucking electricity even though there's enough electricity on the grid.
Oh, yeah. No, that's not you. Okay. Just, you know, fuck SoCal Edison, by the way. Yeah. Yeah. And I heard your guys and Bill went up to some fucking bulls.
There's always going up. We won't go there. But yeah, fuck SoCal Edison and the state of California and Gavin Newsom. Okay. Anyway, so my dad, I guess he bought like different cards that didn't come with the game.
He could buy additional cards. And there was one that he bought and it said baby boomers. Oh, and I said, what? And so I pulled that one out. But holy fuck. I don't know how old this game is.
That game is fucking old. I haven't heard about triple pursuit in like years until you just said it.
And the baby boomer, what did the cards say or whatever? Yeah, I grabbed the cards. I'm like, I'm going to do baby boomers. Like, okay. And it was nothing but war. All about war.
Oh, dear God. Like the band or the actual wars. Like wars like civil war, you know, Vietnam, all this shit. I'm like, God, don't know what orange is.
I'm like, what is orange and my daughter's all, mom, this isn't Keppity. And I'm like, well, I keep answering all the questions. What is, what is, I don't fucking know.
Like, I don't know. The game went on for like an hour and the kids are like, this sucks.
You know what it really does. So yeah. Fine. Fine. And then we say this game called. Oh, you don't know Jack.
You don't know Jack. Is that a game? Yeah. So so the kids are like, fuck this trivial pursuit this fucking shit that you're trying to make us play.
So my daughter is telling me, you want to play a trivial game. I have the game for you. And she gets her. I think she has it on the Xbox or Nintendo Switch. I don't, I don't know.
Okay. But there's this game and she goes, you use your cell phone to answer. I said, I use my cell phone. Okay.
Like talking to it or what? No, it basically it gives you a code and you go to this website and then you punch in your code and you just connect to the, to the fucking game.
I guess. And so your cell phone is basically like your little, your little stick. Yeah. Or you're, or you're trying to.
And this game is fucking hilarious. It's fucking hilarious. You don't know Jack and it's fucking hilarious 1000%.
I, my kids had me fucking dying. I swear I was just like, what the fuck. And it also opened my eyes to the little fucking humans that I raised. I'm like, you are my fucking kid.
I would have never thought about that. Like there was a question.
You need to show me this next week when I come up. Oh yeah, we're fucking playing bitch. Like we're doing this. We are doing this because there was this you, you basic.
There was, there's a bunch of different games and different ways you can play and different, like, I don't know. So we played this one where it was like guess who or something like that.
So basically they ask a question and then you enter your, your answer. And then you have to prove it. Like, who said this, who said that you vote for the best or the funniest answer.
So the question was, who's the boss. And then my kids are like, and I think somebody called mom. And it was God.
And then another kid said, you know, Trump or some shit like fucking dumb. And then I put Tony Danza.
Or, you know, Alyssa Milano's dad. And then the kids are like, who the fuck is Tony Danza? Exactly.
Is Tony Danza still alive? I don't know. I gotta fucking Google that shit.
So mom on, did you ever watch soap operas? Yes. Okay. So Judith light used to be on one life to live. Okay.
Oh, did you ever watch that? I was a days of our lives. Okay. So your channel for NBC. So channel seven. And then did you ever watch the TV show like in, what was it?
Maybe the early 2000s, ugly Betty. Oh, yeah. I know. I watched a couple. Yeah. So Judith light was the mom of the mom of the executives, whatever, but she was on there.
But I fucking love Judith light because she was on one life to live and then fucking who's the boss.
Oh, I love who's the boss. I love Charles in charge. Yeah. Okay. So remember the remember the grandma or Judith lights mom on one life to live. Oh, yes, Mona.
The was there. Yeah. Ever watch the TV show soap. Yes. Yeah. She was on there. I fucking love that show from like the early 1980s.
I love soap. Oh, that's so that's so ridiculous. I love it.
And I missed the 1980s TV shows period and like it. Now that we're talking about this they remade because my daughter subscribed to peacock that remade fucking Magnum PI never was a magnet.
I girl, I was. I am not a magnet. P. I. person. You ever watch Matt Houston.
Yes, I met Houston and the Vegas show like where I want to say it was Robert Wagner as the star and like he would drive his fucking 1960s or 70s Corvette into his fucking garage and the garage would take the elevator up to
fucking sweet. Yes. Yes. Because you are and I fucking love cars and then you would have all the chicks up there with his fucking Corvette. I'm like, I would have fucking chicks or dudes up there too.
Yeah. Guess what? That shit is fucking hot. It was fucking I know this and Matt Houston over Magnum PI but Magnum PI I guess they have a remake and there's what I started watching and I'm like,
Okay, I guess it's cool. Not really.
I don't know. I just used to like Magnum PI. I liked it only because I was on a field trip and like third grade. And I went to the alley county fair and I got Linda Blair's autograph and Tom Selick's autograph.
Yeah. Excuse me. Linda Blair was on that fucking. Yeah, I was like, but I was scared to get her fucking autograph because I was like her head's gonna spin. That's all I knew her as.
That's all I knew her as.
That's all I knew her as because I was walking the exorcist, you know, with my hands over my face and my fingers kind of spread but then closed and I was scared. So fucking scared shit. I was scared of Chuckie. I was fucking scared. I was scared. I was a scary cat.
Speaking of the LA County Fair, I decided to be one of those PTA moms when my daughter was in fourth grade and I'm like, she's like mom and you know what I am not a PTA mom.
No, no, I'm not a PTA president.
You don't fucking say you're not a PTA mom.
Well, guess what? I signed up. So I signed up. She's like begging me because I never show up. I was never a PTA mom. So I don't show up to any of her fucking field trips or whatever.
I signed up for this fucking shit. I had to be responsible. I don't know for maybe five kids or one.
I was a school bus. We fucking take the fucking school bus to fucking Pomona.
Fucking hood by the way.
I don't know what the fuck we did. We saw the fucking animals. We fucking walked around. It was stressful because I had to reel them in.
I never I swear to fucking God. I think after that is when I scheduled my tubes to be fucking tired.
Fuck that shit. Oh my God, that shit is stressful as fuck. You know what's more stressful getting married.
Oh, yeah, I would assume bright zillas and that's right.
I mean, I have to fucking go. I don't know. That was the most stressful time ever because I had just watched the kids.
And I don't know whatever. I'm just glad I made it home and nobody yelled at me. How about that? I would tell myself, man, after I'm a single mom and I had to, I was like, when you're outnumbered, like fuck this.
I'm outnumbered by two. I don't know how these bitches just keep popping them out like fucking cookies and shit from the oven. No.
Uh-uh. If I, uh-uh, I have two arms and two hands. So that's about it. I'm going to grab you both by the fucking callers.
You're going to get run over by a fucking car.
Oh my God. I, I fucking, I did the same shit. I wasn't PTA, but I did the same shit. I signed up to volunteer at my son's school and he's going to this little, and it's here in Oregon.
So we're going, they call it the enchanted forest. I was like, okay, same shit. I had to be.
Like mushrooms or what's going on with the little theme park in the fucking forest. And it kind of reminded me of like bullwinkles or bullwinkles.
Oh yeah. By the way, that's still in Montclair, by the way. I just fucking re-op. I thought that was the family fun center.
No, it's still there, bitch.
Oh fuck.
If it's bullwinkles, whatever the fuck it is, it's still fucking there.
Geez. Okay. Well, they had like the little boats and or whatever the fuck bumper boats. They had like little roller coasters, but they were tiny.
Just little shit like that. They had this little fountain that would be and crap. And I don't know. They had these little tunnels that the kids could fucking crawl in like legit under the, I don't.
And that's where you, by the way, that's where you would get COVID from is crawling in the tunnels. Yeah. Like being in all the balls and dirt because you know, your balls deep.
Yeah, your balls deep in COVID.
Laugh it up, bitch.
So they gave me, I think it was like four, they gave me five kids, but thank God one didn't come to school that day.
So I had four.
Oh God bless.
Yeah.
Yeah. So I was like, thank you. You're a saint.
So I had four kids, one being my son. So I, you know, I'll pinch the shit out of him if he acts the fool. But I had so I had three more.
Oh shit. Why did they give me all I don't know. I'm just saying, but why did they give me the kids on like that have ADHD or some.
Oh my God. Thank you very much. That's where I'm going. Yeah. Thank you.
S June 19 CJ.
You know what they don't get it to me.
From kids.
Yeah,
Oh, myself.
by.
Exactly.
little fuckers and I'm thinking this in my head and but my son is just being so
stellar because he's fucking trained like I wonder why yeah yeah he don't act
the fool because you know that's right bitch but these kids are just like I'm
like excuse you no don't please cut get off that no we don't do that and I it was
the worst fucking day of my life like I and my son's like I'm so glad you came
yeah oh shit fuck so speaking of that so that was my daughter I want to say that
was like maybe third or I want to say that was third grade where we did the
the fucking Pomona fair I want to say fourth or fifth grade I decided to sign
up one more time and be an actual pta mom never fucking again anyways fuck the
pta and fuck them making me try to be this way anyways do you know the Long Beach
aquarium yes yeah okay so I signed up to be a fucking
nice chaperone for that fucking bullshit same fucking shit girl everybody's
running amok and I'm just like I don't know whatever the fuck on the way home I
was talking to I guess there was another mom that was chaperoning so me and her
were talking the entire time on the way home and like versus like you're talking
to that mom that mom is fucking like whatever because I guess the mom's son
was popular I want to say and what a popular whatever the fuck but then like
or I'm sorry on the way there so I'm like yeah well I'm like I need a fucking
adult to talk to I don't want to talk to you on the way home I was so fucking
spent from all these fucking kids I fell asleep on the fucking bus right home
and I don't know I don't remember where the fellow sleep I don't know who sat
next to me but I was so fucking knocked out but I was made fun of after the fact
I'm like you know what I'm so glad I got my tubes tied fuck all you kids fuck
that mom fuck the bus driver fuck everybody like just have one kid you
don't need to have more more than one yeah whatever yeah I just make fun of me
all you want yeah I had a really great nap maybe you should be taking a nap and
shut the fuck up
no you want to know what tops that I did it for the second time one for my son
and then I was like never again and my daughter G unit going on this trip and
it's an it's an overnight two nights as a matter of fact to where fucking nights
we were going to Bend so Bend is across the state kind of like closer to Idaho
the little I don't know it's it's Eastern Oregon where I'm in Western Oregon
okay so it was a fucking I don't know six hour bus trip to these volcanic tubes
and we were gonna it was her going to junior high so it was her like that the
field trip and overnight field trip so okay so I go and shit oh my god I hear
the hesitation in your well we don't sleep in a hotel and shit for two nights
some some school offered us their gym okay we they so boys were on one side
dad's sons whatever right one side and girls mothers whoever on the other side
okay you're being on the fucking wooden floor of course it's a gym yeah and but
I brought a pillow and a sleeping bag I thought I don't fuck I didn't even know
what to expect okay it's and oh son of a bitch and then my daughter guess what
happens you fucking start your fucking period like this is our first oh shit I'm
not even fucking prepared I have like tampons in my purse you're like use this
bitch like you know what we're gonna do we're just gonna wrap your fucking hand
with toilet papers a thousand times right I know I can know and then I had this
other little girl that I'm shaper running oh fuck and then she starts hers
oh yeah what the fuck okay that's yeah traumatic for myself so I'm like you
know what I'm gonna go home yeah I was like I can't do this shit and then I'm
on a bus and it's a six hour drive and we're hiking and we're Lava caves and
tunnels and no lava cakes whatever I'm like okay these two girls are already
full of lava and I gotta go can I please fucking get an Uber home all of us need
to go we all need to go home this is like and then we went on this fucking
hike some type the sisters three sisters or some type of fucking mountain I
don't know and I'm walking and something just on me and what something
do you like it just plops like falls and I'm walking on the top of you yes and
I'm like what the fuck like this kind of like what is that and June it's like mom
they're falling run I go what's fucking falling and running is for these fucking
caterpillars and they're huge yeah I was like I I'm not born to do this shit like
what the fuck do they just wait for a fucking human to combine like there's
one like are they leeches no they're you know they're just these huge fucking
caterpillars just falling from the trees and they're just you know what I am
never moving to Oregon ever yeah because you get spiders in your fucking rig
like I I don't know the other day I saw something that was like kind of
reflecting and my passenger side driving home from work and I just kind of you
know if you just see a single little web I just kind of use my finger and just
whatever and I'm driving and a fucking I'm gonna put my Sun visor down and this
fucking spider is just there and then it just like oh no no no no no no yeah they
get in your fucking car bitch like I don't even fucking know and so I live in
a forest no but you I guess Oregon is then is like Australia I will I will fucking
crash into whoever I don't give a fuck like just like I don't do spiders I do
not no I was telling Darce when I met up with her earlier I'm like I keep having
these dreams about spiders like last month like at least I had three dreams
and the fourth dream I was killing the spiders and I look I look up the meaning
of spiders you have a spider's in a dream represents an overbearing mother
figure and I'm like huh no fucking shit yeah or the fact that you're coming to
Oregon I know overbearing mother figure at my fucking place so yeah okay gotta go
oh I hate spiders there's these wolf spiders here oh yeah shit you not they're
fucking but you know what here's my thing like my daughter is so scared to
kill them or whatever like I have to kill them I'm like bitch you don't pay rent
here so I will fucking kill you with a vengeance yeah yeah have that be a
fucking roach like there there was like like if I walk my dog out like at 2 a.m.
in the morning like there's giant roaches like just hanging out like on the
main street and I'm just like I cannot step on you with my fucking shoes
because that shit is fucking gross you know I'm talking about you'll hear
that lunch and I'm just like I'm just gonna walk away from you I fucking hate
those things yeah they're disgusting and they can get so big yeah I remember when
David I would see those and they'd be on the wall one or whatever and I had an
apartment in SoCal and I thought it was waterbug or whatever the fuck you could
want to call him but they're fucking huge and they're gross they're gross and I
would like a fucking cup if they were on the wall I'd put a cup over it and I
would just slide it so I can be in the cup and that's what my best friend
Darce would do and like she would move it to where they make it like they can
leave oh I don't move it I would put a fucking like match in there spray I would
you know what I'm like it's a fucking roach or whatever waterbug and like I
can't deal with this shit like goodbye I would I would I would totally torture it
put some like fucking hair spray on it until it would freeze because you know I
got that aqua net cha cha net the blue can yeah the blue or the maroon can
that's what I would buy and when those the blue or the maroon can was out I
would buy I guess the purple can you know what it came out with a white can
with some pink little yeah that was like the that was the solid solid one
where it's like you can make a beehive and it wouldn't fucking nothing would
fucking phase that shit you have to wash your hair like three times to get the
fucking shit out but you would still have dandruff or yeah yeah that little
white crap and shit yeah fuck oh my god but that's the best bug spray ever
because period done spray that shit and they just freeze in motion forever yeah
like take a Polaroid picture yeah and on that note do you have a rant for today
because you know we're gonna hook up again tomorrow but do you have a rant for
today oh fuck yeah I do I have plenty of rant but what's your rant ma'am well my
rant is you know what I have so many I have to I'm it's in my head I have to
fucking go for it so I want you to start because I'm gonna pick the best one
okay so you start with your rant because I have like five right now so my main
rant is to anybody who goes to not a gym to a barn like I'm gonna live it up
and I'm gonna order Don Julio 1942 do not order Don Julio 1942 clearly you are a
millennial and you're listening to today's trash that's also a facade called
rap and maybe you should up your game to Don Julio 70 drink your Don Julio 70
at home because they don't carry that at the bar and be more classy stop being
trash that's my fucking rant bitch what's your number one and I'll have more
rants tomorrow but what's your rant for today I am sloshed but you know what
what's really what really pissed me off today and motherfucker is saying catch up
is spicy like oh my god you know what any but spicy like if you're still eating
cat cat's up there you go and you're like over maybe nine years old maybe you
should rethink your goddamn fucking palette and your palette is trash like
cats up should not be on your menu or I guess your condiments menu period I
have for elementary school yeah and I and the only reason why I'm saying this
is because we were at the fair my son is getting a hot dog and it's it's there
they made their own the hot dogs and it was nice it was a eight dollar hot dog
but the people in front of us were like no catch up but that's too spicy too
spicy bitch like I don't get me wrong I was at the grocery store the other day
and I did see Heinz has a sriracha the catch up thing yeah but you know what
they're only doing that to buy into the people who they're only doing that
because people no longer like cats up unless they're two years old yeah and
I'm just like what I always if I go to Carl's Jr. I'm like minus the cats up
I'll get a hamburger minus the cats up I don't you very much I mustard or b&a
yep I will eat my burger plain if they don't have that or like what's it called
the secret yeah no cats up so I'll eat a hot dog plain or with relish yeah my
rent is fuck the people that eat cats up like I and like you said unless you're
fucking 10 years old and younger go for it all day long but fuck and it's not
spicy so it's totally disgusting in 1942 I'm pretty sure the people who think
don Julio 1942 is like the top of top shelf probably love cats up how about
yeah and you know what they can all sit on the curb because it's not day to get
curbstomped how about that yeah yeah yeah get curbstomped you guys need a
better palette yeah fucking cats up and don Julio night was it 1942 my mom was
born in 1941 so I don't know why it's 1942 how about Don Julio 70 y'all need a
fucking get educated and no cats up yeah no cats up and fuck you hikes like I
don't give a shit I hate it I hate it and I hate the people that think it's
spicy it's not fucking spicy it's nothing but sugar yeah sugar and vinegar
together like it's like a douche it's like a fucking summer's eve but fuck the
people that like the cats up I don't like it sugar walls are natural I don't
need no spritz up in my walls thank you
cuz I'm shot a long time ago no okay and on that note you are Pomona bullets and
I'm Borekman this and we out bitches late late