1 00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:03,660 God's and David is known for that. 2 00:00:03,660 --> 00:00:05,240 Tonight we're gonna be talking about a topic 3 00:00:05,240 --> 00:00:08,440 that affects all of us because we all live 4 00:00:08,440 --> 00:00:11,520 in a world full of conflict. 5 00:00:11,520 --> 00:00:15,280 And you don't have to look far to see conflict in our world. 6 00:00:15,280 --> 00:00:17,120 If you've been paying attention in the news, 7 00:00:17,120 --> 00:00:19,920 there's a lot of conflict right now in the Middle East 8 00:00:19,920 --> 00:00:23,400 and in Israel, specifically along the Gaza Strip 9 00:00:23,400 --> 00:00:26,600 and throughout the cities of Israel. 10 00:00:26,600 --> 00:00:28,080 If you've been paying attention at all here 11 00:00:28,080 --> 00:00:31,640 in local politics, there's a lot of conflict going on, 12 00:00:31,640 --> 00:00:36,080 especially with the first few issues on the ballot 13 00:00:36,080 --> 00:00:37,760 this coming November. 14 00:00:37,760 --> 00:00:42,160 You don't have to look far to see conflict in our world, 15 00:00:42,160 --> 00:00:44,960 both on the national level, on an international level, 16 00:00:44,960 --> 00:00:47,480 and even in our own community. 17 00:00:47,480 --> 00:00:51,880 But there are conflicts that affect us on an everyday basis. 18 00:00:51,880 --> 00:00:55,040 A lot of times those kinds of conflicts are far from us, 19 00:00:55,040 --> 00:00:57,400 or we deal with them when it's time to vote. 20 00:00:57,400 --> 00:01:00,560 But a lot of times the conflicts that really deal with us 21 00:01:00,560 --> 00:01:04,120 on a week to week basis where we live, work, and play 22 00:01:04,120 --> 00:01:05,980 are a little bit more, 23 00:01:07,360 --> 00:01:09,740 we see these things a little bit more often. 24 00:01:09,740 --> 00:01:14,740 For example, our golden Oreos, really Oreos, right? 25 00:01:15,720 --> 00:01:17,720 We just talked about this one with candy corn. 26 00:01:17,720 --> 00:01:20,160 Yes, candy corn, no candy corn, right? 27 00:01:20,160 --> 00:01:21,840 I was trying to think of a few more of ones 28 00:01:21,840 --> 00:01:25,200 that we face these on a more daily basis. 29 00:01:25,200 --> 00:01:27,760 One where I come from, 30 00:01:27,760 --> 00:01:32,760 we don't call the carbonated beverage that you drink pop. 31 00:01:32,800 --> 00:01:34,800 But there's that argument, right? 32 00:01:34,800 --> 00:01:36,000 Pop, is it pop? 33 00:01:36,000 --> 00:01:37,000 Is it soda? 34 00:01:37,000 --> 00:01:37,840 Is it Coke? 35 00:01:37,840 --> 00:01:39,400 What do you call it, right? 36 00:01:39,400 --> 00:01:43,280 There's the, this one, this one I get, 37 00:01:43,280 --> 00:01:44,920 I had to deal with this one this last week. 38 00:01:44,920 --> 00:01:48,400 This pineapple really belong on pizza, right? 39 00:01:48,400 --> 00:01:50,360 Some of these conflicts, 40 00:01:50,360 --> 00:01:53,080 we may not ever get an answer 41 00:01:53,080 --> 00:01:55,200 to some of these kinds of conflicts. 42 00:01:55,200 --> 00:01:56,480 If you live in Ohio, 43 00:01:56,480 --> 00:01:58,640 can you really be a Michigan fan, right? 44 00:01:58,640 --> 00:02:02,280 And the conflict continues, right? 45 00:02:02,280 --> 00:02:04,160 The conflict click, right? 46 00:02:04,160 --> 00:02:05,920 Many times the conflict's all getting aside. 47 00:02:05,920 --> 00:02:09,600 We do live in a world that's full of conflict, right? 48 00:02:09,600 --> 00:02:12,160 Many times the conflict can be in our own families. 49 00:02:12,160 --> 00:02:14,200 It can be in our neighborhoods. 50 00:02:14,200 --> 00:02:18,240 It can be in the city square, in our own state, 51 00:02:18,240 --> 00:02:20,920 on a national level, in an international level. 52 00:02:20,920 --> 00:02:25,920 One writer said this conflict is humanity's primal instinct. 53 00:02:26,440 --> 00:02:28,240 And James chapter four, verse one, 54 00:02:28,240 --> 00:02:29,360 kind of alludes to that. 55 00:02:29,360 --> 00:02:32,680 Where does wars and fighting come among you? 56 00:02:32,680 --> 00:02:34,760 It's because of our own lusts. 57 00:02:34,760 --> 00:02:37,920 It is kind of part of that old man, that old nature 58 00:02:37,920 --> 00:02:41,080 that we struggle with conflict in our world 59 00:02:41,080 --> 00:02:43,920 and probably won't cease conflict 60 00:02:43,920 --> 00:02:47,440 until we arrive to our heavenly home 61 00:02:47,440 --> 00:02:50,760 because of the lusts that we have inside of us. 62 00:02:50,760 --> 00:02:52,720 But one of the things that we're gonna hopefully 63 00:02:52,720 --> 00:02:54,760 be able to pull out from our scripture today 64 00:02:54,760 --> 00:02:56,800 is how to deal with conflict. 65 00:02:56,800 --> 00:03:00,040 Because as believers, we need to know how to learn 66 00:03:00,040 --> 00:03:02,560 to deal with conflict as it arises 67 00:03:02,560 --> 00:03:04,960 in a way that honors God and demonstrates 68 00:03:04,960 --> 00:03:07,520 that we have a heart after his. 69 00:03:07,520 --> 00:03:09,360 So if you're gonna be in your scripture tonight, 70 00:03:09,360 --> 00:03:13,160 we're gonna be in first Samuel chapter 25. 71 00:03:13,160 --> 00:03:15,040 And we've got a lot to cover tonight. 72 00:03:15,040 --> 00:03:16,600 It's a very lengthy chapter. 73 00:03:16,600 --> 00:03:18,200 We won't read every single verse, 74 00:03:18,200 --> 00:03:20,600 but kind of help pull out some of these highlights. 75 00:03:20,600 --> 00:03:22,800 Let's pray together before we begin 76 00:03:22,800 --> 00:03:24,960 to dive into the scripture this evening. 77 00:03:24,960 --> 00:03:28,400 Father in heaven, we're so thankful for the word of God 78 00:03:28,400 --> 00:03:30,800 that illuminates our hearts and our minds, Lord, 79 00:03:30,800 --> 00:03:33,880 that you have given us this instruction booklet 80 00:03:33,880 --> 00:03:36,520 so that we might be able to be conformed to your image, 81 00:03:36,520 --> 00:03:38,680 that we might be able to know who you are, 82 00:03:38,680 --> 00:03:40,840 that we might be able to understand the grace 83 00:03:40,840 --> 00:03:43,080 that you've given to us in the eternal life 84 00:03:43,080 --> 00:03:45,040 as promised to all who believe. 85 00:03:45,040 --> 00:03:47,800 Father, I pray that if there is someone here tonight 86 00:03:47,800 --> 00:03:50,200 who does not know Christ as their savior, 87 00:03:50,200 --> 00:03:52,480 Lord, that tonight through the preaching of the word of God, 88 00:03:52,480 --> 00:03:55,160 you would use the spirit of God to convict their heart, 89 00:03:55,160 --> 00:03:58,360 to help them understand that there is a greater conflict 90 00:03:58,360 --> 00:04:02,280 beyond just the conflict that we have in our everyday life. 91 00:04:02,280 --> 00:04:05,360 Lord, that's the conflict between man and God, 92 00:04:05,360 --> 00:04:07,400 sin and righteousness, but Lord, 93 00:04:07,400 --> 00:04:09,600 you have already bridged the gap 94 00:04:09,600 --> 00:04:11,600 so that we might have peace with you. 95 00:04:11,600 --> 00:04:13,560 Father, I pray for those in here today 96 00:04:13,560 --> 00:04:16,640 who have already called upon Christ to save you, 97 00:04:16,640 --> 00:04:18,240 save them, but Lord, that they would help 98 00:04:18,240 --> 00:04:22,000 to have a heart like yours in dealing with conflict, 99 00:04:22,000 --> 00:04:24,320 that we might be able to use this scripture, Lord, 100 00:04:24,320 --> 00:04:26,720 you might be able to use it and the Holy Spirit 101 00:04:26,720 --> 00:04:27,920 to illuminate our hearts tonight. 102 00:04:27,920 --> 00:04:30,760 And Jesus, and we pray, amen. 103 00:04:30,760 --> 00:04:35,400 So I wanna kind of summarize the first dozen verses or so 104 00:04:35,400 --> 00:04:37,960 as we lead up to the context of what we're gonna be talking 105 00:04:37,960 --> 00:04:38,800 about. 106 00:04:38,800 --> 00:04:41,960 So just kind of keeping up with David's life, 107 00:04:41,960 --> 00:04:45,120 we've been walking through Samuel and his account 108 00:04:45,120 --> 00:04:47,320 of David's life from his early beginnings 109 00:04:47,320 --> 00:04:49,760 as a shepherd boy to his anointing, 110 00:04:49,760 --> 00:04:52,720 to his display of courage and trust in Lord 111 00:04:52,720 --> 00:04:56,000 on the battlefield with the Philistine Goliath. 112 00:04:56,000 --> 00:04:59,720 We've seen him go through some valleys 113 00:04:59,720 --> 00:05:02,720 in losing his friends, losing his family, 114 00:05:02,720 --> 00:05:04,640 losing many different things, 115 00:05:04,640 --> 00:05:07,160 but finding ultimate satisfaction in God. 116 00:05:07,160 --> 00:05:10,040 We've been able to see him interact with Saul in the cave 117 00:05:10,040 --> 00:05:13,040 and sparing Saul's life, him honoring God 118 00:05:13,040 --> 00:05:14,240 through that portion. 119 00:05:14,240 --> 00:05:16,800 But now we find in 1 Samuel chapter 25, 120 00:05:16,800 --> 00:05:21,240 there's sort of a ceasefire between him and King Saul. 121 00:05:21,240 --> 00:05:26,040 And so David finds himself out in an area called Hebron, 122 00:05:26,040 --> 00:05:29,600 out near Carmel, not the mountain, but a different city. 123 00:05:29,600 --> 00:05:32,680 And here he is with, he's kind of gathered together 124 00:05:32,680 --> 00:05:35,280 a band of 600 rough riders, if you will. 125 00:05:35,280 --> 00:05:37,880 These guys are men of war. 126 00:05:37,880 --> 00:05:40,960 They are trained militarily and they are 127 00:05:40,960 --> 00:05:43,000 a legion to David. 128 00:05:43,000 --> 00:05:46,520 And here he finds himself working on the countryside 129 00:05:46,520 --> 00:05:50,560 back into a familiar territory where he is guarding sheep. 130 00:05:50,560 --> 00:05:52,400 He's guarding a rich man's sheep. 131 00:05:52,400 --> 00:05:56,120 And that rich man, the Bible says, his name is Nabal. 132 00:05:56,120 --> 00:06:00,680 Now Nabal is kind of given to us in verse three of chapter 25. 133 00:06:02,320 --> 00:06:05,640 In verse one, Samuel died, the prophet Samuel, 134 00:06:05,640 --> 00:06:08,200 and all of Israel mourned him. 135 00:06:08,200 --> 00:06:11,360 And then now we find David out in the countryside 136 00:06:11,360 --> 00:06:12,440 in familiar territory. 137 00:06:12,440 --> 00:06:16,160 Verse three, we are familiarized with a man named Nabal. 138 00:06:16,160 --> 00:06:18,760 And his wife Abigail, this man, the Bible says, 139 00:06:18,760 --> 00:06:19,960 is a rich man. 140 00:06:19,960 --> 00:06:23,000 He has many possessions and a lot of those possessions. 141 00:06:23,000 --> 00:06:28,000 Of course, culturally is sheep and goats and other livestock. 142 00:06:28,680 --> 00:06:33,360 And so we find that here, David is in the wilderness 143 00:06:33,360 --> 00:06:36,760 in verse four and he is hearing good news, 144 00:06:36,760 --> 00:06:37,800 good news for him. 145 00:06:37,800 --> 00:06:42,800 He's hearing that Nabal is come time to shear the sheep. 146 00:06:42,960 --> 00:06:45,640 Now to help kind of clue you into what's going on here, 147 00:06:45,640 --> 00:06:50,640 culturally, sheep shearing time is a celebratory time 148 00:06:51,160 --> 00:06:54,240 in the Middle East because it means payday. 149 00:06:54,240 --> 00:06:58,600 When the sheep are shorn, it is time to get paid 150 00:06:58,600 --> 00:07:00,640 to make lots of money. 151 00:07:00,640 --> 00:07:02,480 So it's a celebratory time. 152 00:07:02,480 --> 00:07:04,920 And it was very common back in this time 153 00:07:04,920 --> 00:07:08,960 for those who had much riches and much sheep 154 00:07:08,960 --> 00:07:10,680 when it came shearing time, 155 00:07:10,680 --> 00:07:13,880 that they were going to kind of pay off some of their debts. 156 00:07:13,880 --> 00:07:16,520 And they were going to pay the people that they owed. 157 00:07:16,520 --> 00:07:19,880 In this regard, it was very common for those who had 158 00:07:19,880 --> 00:07:21,920 a lot of money and a lot of sheep 159 00:07:21,920 --> 00:07:24,720 and a lot of country acres to protect 160 00:07:24,720 --> 00:07:26,280 from invaders and thieves 161 00:07:26,280 --> 00:07:29,960 that many times these people would hire mercenaries, 162 00:07:29,960 --> 00:07:32,760 they would hire military people 163 00:07:32,760 --> 00:07:36,680 to protect their investments before it came time to shear. 164 00:07:36,680 --> 00:07:40,240 And that's where we find David and his 600 rough riders. 165 00:07:40,240 --> 00:07:43,400 They are protecting Nabal's property. 166 00:07:43,400 --> 00:07:45,960 His sheep from invaders, from thieves, 167 00:07:45,960 --> 00:07:48,480 and from anyone who would come in 168 00:07:48,480 --> 00:07:51,840 and try to make a profit off of this livestock. 169 00:07:51,840 --> 00:07:53,920 And so it's sheep shearing time. 170 00:07:53,920 --> 00:07:58,920 And that means that it's payday for David and for his 600 men. 171 00:07:59,960 --> 00:08:01,720 So it's a celebratory time. 172 00:08:01,720 --> 00:08:04,800 When David hears that it's time to shear the sheep, 173 00:08:04,800 --> 00:08:09,800 he sends in an envoy to Nabal and he sends a couple of men. 174 00:08:09,880 --> 00:08:11,720 He doesn't want to frighten Nabal, 175 00:08:11,720 --> 00:08:14,720 but they go in and they kind of go expectantly. 176 00:08:14,720 --> 00:08:18,280 They go in because it's time for them to receive the payment 177 00:08:18,280 --> 00:08:20,880 for all the work that they have done. 178 00:08:20,880 --> 00:08:23,600 And in verses five through 12, 179 00:08:23,600 --> 00:08:28,200 David sends out this envoy and these men are unfortunately 180 00:08:28,200 --> 00:08:30,440 ridiculed and dishonored. 181 00:08:30,440 --> 00:08:33,240 Nabal goes, I don't know who David is, 182 00:08:33,240 --> 00:08:34,880 I don't know who these people are. 183 00:08:34,880 --> 00:08:37,280 It seems to me that right now, 184 00:08:37,280 --> 00:08:39,520 a lot of people are defying their king. 185 00:08:39,520 --> 00:08:41,920 That was kind of a slam towards David. 186 00:08:41,920 --> 00:08:43,480 And so because I don't know him 187 00:08:43,480 --> 00:08:45,960 and I don't know you people, get lost. 188 00:08:45,960 --> 00:08:48,640 And so there is a great amount of dishonor 189 00:08:48,640 --> 00:08:50,640 and the people who were working for David 190 00:08:50,640 --> 00:08:55,000 that were sent by David walk away empty handed. 191 00:08:55,000 --> 00:08:57,680 And that's where we pick up in our text today 192 00:08:57,680 --> 00:09:01,200 in 1 Samuel chapter 25 verse 13. 193 00:09:01,200 --> 00:09:02,920 We're dealing with conflict tonight 194 00:09:02,920 --> 00:09:05,800 and we're gonna look at four different actions 195 00:09:05,800 --> 00:09:09,160 that we can apply to our lives from this text today 196 00:09:09,160 --> 00:09:12,080 that we might be able to learn to deal with conflict 197 00:09:12,080 --> 00:09:15,160 as it arises in a way that honors God. 198 00:09:15,160 --> 00:09:16,200 So if you're taking notes, 199 00:09:16,200 --> 00:09:18,320 the first thing that we were gonna learn today 200 00:09:18,320 --> 00:09:22,560 is that when conflict arises, we need to slow down. 201 00:09:22,560 --> 00:09:25,280 When conflict arises, slow down. 202 00:09:25,280 --> 00:09:28,160 And we learn this by watching what David doesn't do 203 00:09:28,160 --> 00:09:29,280 in verse 13. 204 00:09:29,280 --> 00:09:30,520 So if you have your copy of your scripture, 205 00:09:30,520 --> 00:09:33,680 let's look in here, 1 Samuel chapter 25, 206 00:09:33,680 --> 00:09:35,960 beginning in verse 13, it says, 207 00:09:35,960 --> 00:09:40,960 David said unto his men, gird you on every man his sword 208 00:09:41,320 --> 00:09:43,560 and they girded on every man his sword. 209 00:09:43,560 --> 00:09:45,840 And David also girded on his sword. 210 00:09:45,840 --> 00:09:49,960 And there went up after David about 400 men 211 00:09:49,960 --> 00:09:53,080 and 200 abode with the stuff. 212 00:09:53,080 --> 00:09:55,120 Now, here's what's going on. 213 00:09:55,120 --> 00:09:57,800 David has been dishonored publicly. 214 00:09:57,800 --> 00:10:02,360 He's got 600 men at his disposal. 215 00:10:02,360 --> 00:10:04,280 When the men come back with the news 216 00:10:04,280 --> 00:10:08,080 that Nabal has not only dishonored you publicly, 217 00:10:08,080 --> 00:10:11,360 but he's also decided to not pay off debts with you. 218 00:10:11,360 --> 00:10:13,640 David is infuriated. 219 00:10:13,640 --> 00:10:16,000 In verse 13, he says, all right, 220 00:10:16,000 --> 00:10:18,240 I want all of you to put your sword on. 221 00:10:18,240 --> 00:10:21,400 Now, this wasn't some kind of intimidation gesture. 222 00:10:21,400 --> 00:10:26,280 David decided at some point that the way to respond 223 00:10:26,280 --> 00:10:31,280 to this dishonoring message and this conflict 224 00:10:31,280 --> 00:10:34,320 is to ride into battle. 225 00:10:34,320 --> 00:10:37,600 The Bible says here that he takes 400 men. 226 00:10:37,600 --> 00:10:39,680 That's a lot of people. 227 00:10:39,680 --> 00:10:42,400 And his plan was to take these 400 men, 228 00:10:42,400 --> 00:10:43,520 we find out later in scripture, 229 00:10:43,520 --> 00:10:48,400 he was planning on killing Nabal and every man 230 00:10:48,400 --> 00:10:52,860 in that community, shepherds, people he knew included. 231 00:10:52,860 --> 00:10:57,640 That's how frustrated and how upset David was. 232 00:10:57,640 --> 00:11:00,840 No doubt, David believed that he was owed something 233 00:11:00,840 --> 00:11:03,920 and he was gonna collect what was due to him, 234 00:11:03,920 --> 00:11:05,880 no matter what. 235 00:11:05,880 --> 00:11:08,440 David's response in his display of anger 236 00:11:08,440 --> 00:11:12,520 displays the danger of a gut reaction 237 00:11:12,520 --> 00:11:14,400 in the times of conflict. 238 00:11:14,400 --> 00:11:17,880 One counselor and best-selling author wrote this. 239 00:11:17,880 --> 00:11:21,480 He said, severe anger is a form of insanity. 240 00:11:21,480 --> 00:11:24,280 You are insane whenever you are not in control 241 00:11:24,280 --> 00:11:25,120 of your behavior. 242 00:11:25,120 --> 00:11:27,680 Therefore, when you are angry and out of control, 243 00:11:27,680 --> 00:11:29,640 you are temporarily insane. 244 00:11:29,640 --> 00:11:33,400 I don't know how much I agree with this in entirety, 245 00:11:33,400 --> 00:11:37,040 but there is a clue here because that's not necessarily 246 00:11:37,040 --> 00:11:39,960 what we've seen David's track record so far. 247 00:11:39,960 --> 00:11:42,560 David doesn't normally say, I'm so mad, 248 00:11:42,560 --> 00:11:44,680 I'm going to just murder an entire town. 249 00:11:44,680 --> 00:11:48,080 That's not the David that we've learned so far. 250 00:11:48,080 --> 00:11:52,920 But at some point here, when the conflict was arisen, 251 00:11:52,920 --> 00:11:57,920 David decided to do, to make a choice not to slow down, 252 00:11:57,920 --> 00:11:59,720 but to do wrong. 253 00:11:59,720 --> 00:12:01,840 If you spend any amount of time on the internet, 254 00:12:01,840 --> 00:12:04,120 you've probably come across this meme 255 00:12:04,120 --> 00:12:06,880 where there's a conversation going on in a boardroom 256 00:12:06,880 --> 00:12:08,400 and there's two good answers 257 00:12:08,400 --> 00:12:10,320 and then one smug guy gives an answer, 258 00:12:10,320 --> 00:12:13,440 the boss gets mad and throws the one guy out the window. 259 00:12:13,440 --> 00:12:15,160 Anybody seen this meme before? 260 00:12:15,160 --> 00:12:16,760 Maybe some of you who have parents 261 00:12:16,760 --> 00:12:18,600 or some of you who are parents of teenagers, 262 00:12:18,600 --> 00:12:20,440 maybe you felt like this one time 263 00:12:20,440 --> 00:12:23,520 when you got an answer from your kid, right? 264 00:12:23,520 --> 00:12:27,640 But we all deal with conflict sometimes poorly. 265 00:12:27,640 --> 00:12:30,320 I remember one time when I was in college, 266 00:12:30,320 --> 00:12:33,560 I was teaching a Wana group on a Wednesday night. 267 00:12:33,560 --> 00:12:36,200 I was the director of the Truth and Training Club, 268 00:12:36,200 --> 00:12:37,840 which is third, fourth and fifth graders. 269 00:12:37,840 --> 00:12:40,520 And we had one young man in our class. 270 00:12:40,520 --> 00:12:42,480 He was such a joy to have in class. 271 00:12:42,480 --> 00:12:43,760 He ever had one of those. 272 00:12:43,760 --> 00:12:45,360 He was one of those kinds of people 273 00:12:45,360 --> 00:12:48,800 that you just were really frustrated all the time, right? 274 00:12:48,800 --> 00:12:51,440 Because every time he came into class, 275 00:12:51,440 --> 00:12:54,640 he was disrespectful, he was disrespectful to teachers, 276 00:12:54,640 --> 00:12:56,640 he was disrespectful to other people. 277 00:12:56,640 --> 00:12:59,680 He was always arguing, he was making fun of people. 278 00:12:59,680 --> 00:13:01,760 He was just a joy to having class. 279 00:13:01,760 --> 00:13:05,680 And I remember one time we were having an illustration time 280 00:13:05,680 --> 00:13:07,880 when we were illustrating about the Bible 281 00:13:07,880 --> 00:13:09,000 and I was using an egg. 282 00:13:09,000 --> 00:13:11,280 And we had an egg broken up and an egg yolk. 283 00:13:11,280 --> 00:13:12,920 And we were finished with the illustration 284 00:13:12,920 --> 00:13:15,320 and he decided, you know, it would be a really good time 285 00:13:15,320 --> 00:13:18,720 to stand up, to come put his hand in the egg 286 00:13:18,720 --> 00:13:21,840 and then try to wipe it all over the back of my shirt. 287 00:13:21,840 --> 00:13:24,280 And I remember at this point, I had, you know, 288 00:13:24,280 --> 00:13:26,640 I was not dealing with this temptation very well 289 00:13:26,640 --> 00:13:27,480 at this point. 290 00:13:27,480 --> 00:13:29,520 And I remember when he would came around my back, 291 00:13:29,520 --> 00:13:32,160 I spun around to grab him and I elbowed him 292 00:13:32,160 --> 00:13:33,080 in the back of the head. 293 00:13:33,080 --> 00:13:35,560 Now, not on purpose, after I went, 294 00:13:35,560 --> 00:13:37,640 after I apologized to the mom, I was like, I'm so sorry. 295 00:13:37,640 --> 00:13:39,040 I didn't mean to do that. 296 00:13:39,040 --> 00:13:41,200 At one point I went home and I was just like, you know what? 297 00:13:41,200 --> 00:13:43,440 Man, if I would have spun around a little bit harder, 298 00:13:43,440 --> 00:13:45,240 maybe I would have knocked him out. 299 00:13:45,240 --> 00:13:49,680 But sometimes we don't deal with conflict the right way. 300 00:13:49,680 --> 00:13:52,840 We get heated, we get frustrated. 301 00:13:52,840 --> 00:13:55,760 In fact, we don't do what Paul says 302 00:13:55,760 --> 00:13:57,560 in 1 Corinthians chapter 9, 27. 303 00:13:57,560 --> 00:14:00,280 We don't keep our bodies under subjection. 304 00:14:00,280 --> 00:14:02,960 Because oftentimes that kind of response, 305 00:14:02,960 --> 00:14:05,120 when we deal with conflict, when conflict arises, 306 00:14:05,120 --> 00:14:09,240 the idea of slowing down is actually not only counter-cultural, 307 00:14:09,240 --> 00:14:11,960 but it's also counter-biological. 308 00:14:11,960 --> 00:14:15,320 Because a lot of times when we enter into a time of frustration 309 00:14:15,320 --> 00:14:20,320 and time of anger, our body actually has a natural response. 310 00:14:20,320 --> 00:14:23,000 We enter into a fight or flight situation 311 00:14:23,000 --> 00:14:24,720 when we become very angry. 312 00:14:24,720 --> 00:14:29,920 And a biologist have told us that actually what happens 313 00:14:29,920 --> 00:14:33,640 is our brain releases a hormone called adrenaline. 314 00:14:33,640 --> 00:14:35,600 And when adrenaline hits the bloodstream, 315 00:14:35,600 --> 00:14:37,720 it increases your blood pressure, 316 00:14:37,720 --> 00:14:40,160 makes your heart beat faster, it squeezes the arteries, 317 00:14:40,160 --> 00:14:42,160 there's all kinds of things that happen 318 00:14:42,160 --> 00:14:44,120 when adrenaline hits the bloodstream. 319 00:14:44,120 --> 00:14:46,640 And so what happens is that because we're still living 320 00:14:46,640 --> 00:14:48,840 in these sin-cursed bodies, 321 00:14:48,840 --> 00:14:51,480 we still have bodies that betray the way 322 00:14:51,480 --> 00:14:54,320 that we should respond in times of conflict. 323 00:14:54,320 --> 00:14:58,120 And so when we get angry, we actually have a biological response 324 00:14:58,120 --> 00:15:00,960 that we not only have to deal with the spiritual side of it, 325 00:15:00,960 --> 00:15:03,440 but the biological side as well. 326 00:15:03,440 --> 00:15:05,280 Now, as we're dealing with this, 327 00:15:05,280 --> 00:15:08,720 I don't know that we'll gain victory over that portion 328 00:15:08,720 --> 00:15:11,160 until we reach heaven and we get some glorified bodies 329 00:15:11,160 --> 00:15:15,440 that no longer have the wrong responses to things. 330 00:15:15,440 --> 00:15:18,320 But what I think we should do while we're here 331 00:15:18,320 --> 00:15:19,760 and we're still dealing with that 332 00:15:19,760 --> 00:15:23,560 is heed the words of the wisest man in the world, Solomon, 333 00:15:23,560 --> 00:15:25,040 from Proverbs chapter 29. 334 00:15:25,040 --> 00:15:25,880 He says, 335 00:15:25,880 --> 00:15:27,720 In angry man stirs up strife, 336 00:15:27,720 --> 00:15:31,080 and a furious man aboundeth in transgression. 337 00:15:31,080 --> 00:15:34,760 When conflict arises, what we must learn to do 338 00:15:34,760 --> 00:15:37,600 is rather let, instead of letting the fires burn 339 00:15:37,600 --> 00:15:41,280 and us rushing into what's going on, that conflict, 340 00:15:41,280 --> 00:15:46,080 we need to learn to slow down, slow down. 341 00:15:46,080 --> 00:15:48,360 Not only that, when conflict arises, 342 00:15:48,360 --> 00:15:49,440 if you're taking notes number two, 343 00:15:49,440 --> 00:15:51,680 we need to learn to listen up. 344 00:15:51,680 --> 00:15:55,840 When conflict arises, we must learn to listen up. 345 00:15:55,840 --> 00:15:58,200 Let's read on in verse 14. 346 00:15:58,200 --> 00:15:59,040 It says, 347 00:15:59,040 --> 00:16:01,960 But one young man told Abigail, Nabal's wife, 348 00:16:01,960 --> 00:16:05,800 saying, behold David sent messengers out of the wilderness 349 00:16:05,800 --> 00:16:08,920 to salute our master, and he railed on them. 350 00:16:08,920 --> 00:16:12,920 That's talking about Nabal railing on David's envoy. 351 00:16:12,920 --> 00:16:15,520 But the men were very good unto us, 352 00:16:15,520 --> 00:16:17,000 and we were not hurt. 353 00:16:17,000 --> 00:16:18,920 Neither missed we anything, 354 00:16:18,920 --> 00:16:22,080 as long as we were conversant with them 355 00:16:22,080 --> 00:16:25,120 when we were in the fields. 356 00:16:25,120 --> 00:16:28,960 And they were a wall unto us, both day and night, 357 00:16:28,960 --> 00:16:31,240 night and day, and all the while, 358 00:16:31,240 --> 00:16:33,480 while we were with them keeping the sheep. 359 00:16:33,480 --> 00:16:36,880 Now therefore, know and consider what thou wilt do, 360 00:16:36,880 --> 00:16:39,680 for evil is determined against our master, 361 00:16:39,680 --> 00:16:41,880 and against all his household, 362 00:16:41,880 --> 00:16:45,120 for such is a son of Belial, 363 00:16:45,120 --> 00:16:47,160 that a man cannot speak to him. 364 00:16:47,160 --> 00:16:50,160 Then Abigail made haste, took 200 loaves, 365 00:16:50,160 --> 00:16:53,440 and two bottles of wine, and five sheep ready dressed, 366 00:16:53,440 --> 00:16:55,360 and five measures of parched corn, 367 00:16:55,360 --> 00:16:57,120 and a hundred clusters of grapes, 368 00:16:57,120 --> 00:16:59,880 and 200 cakes of figs, and laid them on asses, 369 00:16:59,880 --> 00:17:00,880 and she said to her servants, 370 00:17:00,880 --> 00:17:04,040 Go on before me, behold, I come after you, 371 00:17:04,040 --> 00:17:07,600 but she told not her husband. 372 00:17:07,600 --> 00:17:12,600 Sociologists have identified really three main building blocks, 373 00:17:12,600 --> 00:17:15,200 if you will, when it comes to how culture works 374 00:17:15,200 --> 00:17:16,840 in our society. 375 00:17:16,840 --> 00:17:21,040 There are three main components in which culture is built. 376 00:17:21,040 --> 00:17:23,040 They're kind of like they've been referred to 377 00:17:23,040 --> 00:17:26,840 as almost like the basic colors of the painting palette, 378 00:17:26,840 --> 00:17:29,640 where you can take those three basic colors 379 00:17:29,640 --> 00:17:32,880 and you can paint all kinds of different shades of colors. 380 00:17:32,880 --> 00:17:35,840 Well, the three basic components of culture 381 00:17:35,840 --> 00:17:39,560 is shame, guilt, and fear, 382 00:17:39,560 --> 00:17:42,560 and how cultures react and utilize their colors. 383 00:17:42,560 --> 00:17:45,160 These are the things that change those things, 384 00:17:45,160 --> 00:17:48,000 change very drastically depending on where you live. 385 00:17:48,000 --> 00:17:51,800 Now, we grew up, if you're like me, you grew up in the West, 386 00:17:51,800 --> 00:17:53,720 we grew up in what's called a, 387 00:17:53,720 --> 00:17:57,080 a sociologist would call it a guilt-based society. 388 00:17:57,080 --> 00:18:00,920 So our society, a lot of the West, North America, Europe, 389 00:18:00,920 --> 00:18:03,920 our laws, the way that we interact with each other, 390 00:18:03,920 --> 00:18:06,640 a lot of time is built on guilt or no guilt. 391 00:18:06,640 --> 00:18:09,040 That's how our laws are built, the way they are, 392 00:18:09,040 --> 00:18:11,240 that's the reasons why we interact with each other 393 00:18:11,240 --> 00:18:12,720 a lot the way that we do. 394 00:18:12,720 --> 00:18:14,960 But as you begin to travel across the world, 395 00:18:14,960 --> 00:18:18,480 what you find in the East, specifically the Middle East 396 00:18:18,480 --> 00:18:21,760 and Asia and many parts of Asia Minor today, 397 00:18:21,760 --> 00:18:24,240 these are still shame-based cultures, 398 00:18:24,240 --> 00:18:26,200 which means that guilt is, 399 00:18:26,200 --> 00:18:29,160 it's part of how they deal with each other, 400 00:18:29,160 --> 00:18:32,080 but shame is really more the driving force 401 00:18:32,080 --> 00:18:35,280 between how relationships are handled. 402 00:18:35,280 --> 00:18:37,120 If you're in a fear-based culture, 403 00:18:37,120 --> 00:18:39,720 many of those have been described as tribal cultures, 404 00:18:39,720 --> 00:18:42,200 like in those in Latin America or Africa 405 00:18:42,200 --> 00:18:44,720 or even places like New Guinea, 406 00:18:44,720 --> 00:18:46,840 that's how their culture is based. 407 00:18:46,840 --> 00:18:49,880 And we see that a lot through how they interact 408 00:18:49,880 --> 00:18:54,280 with their gods and the witch doctors, the voodoo, 409 00:18:54,280 --> 00:18:56,400 they try to build fear and the tribes 410 00:18:56,400 --> 00:18:58,320 try to have these fear competitions. 411 00:18:58,320 --> 00:19:01,400 This is how they do culture. 412 00:19:01,400 --> 00:19:04,080 But when we're dealing with David here, 413 00:19:04,080 --> 00:19:06,400 David is in a shame-based culture. 414 00:19:06,400 --> 00:19:10,200 And the shame that is brought upon David by Nabal 415 00:19:10,200 --> 00:19:12,440 and his ungracious and demeaning words 416 00:19:12,440 --> 00:19:14,840 to David's envoy and David personally 417 00:19:14,840 --> 00:19:17,440 create this cultural imbalance 418 00:19:17,440 --> 00:19:20,600 that kind of tempts David to balance the scales. 419 00:19:20,600 --> 00:19:22,640 That's just kind of a little bit of explanation 420 00:19:22,640 --> 00:19:26,040 of what may be going on through David's heart. 421 00:19:26,040 --> 00:19:28,040 David chooses though, 422 00:19:28,040 --> 00:19:30,080 that how he's gonna balance the scales 423 00:19:30,080 --> 00:19:33,240 is that he's going to kill Nabal, 424 00:19:33,240 --> 00:19:36,080 his family and their workforce. 425 00:19:36,080 --> 00:19:38,680 That's how he decides to balance the scales. 426 00:19:38,680 --> 00:19:43,240 But we see here a wise lady, according to verse three, 427 00:19:43,240 --> 00:19:45,560 now it introduces us to Nabal, 428 00:19:45,560 --> 00:19:47,760 which means fool by the way, 429 00:19:47,760 --> 00:19:51,120 and Abigail, according to verse three, 430 00:19:51,120 --> 00:19:53,040 is a woman of good understanding 431 00:19:53,040 --> 00:19:55,240 and of beautiful countenance. 432 00:19:55,240 --> 00:19:58,800 And this lady is reported to by one of her servants, 433 00:19:58,800 --> 00:20:01,120 one of the shepherds in verse 14, 434 00:20:01,120 --> 00:20:03,680 who relays this dishonorable treatment 435 00:20:03,680 --> 00:20:06,960 of David and his envoy to Abigail. 436 00:20:06,960 --> 00:20:09,600 And Abigail right away knows, 437 00:20:09,600 --> 00:20:14,080 I've got to intervene, I've got to do something. 438 00:20:14,080 --> 00:20:16,200 And so we see in the text that we just read, 439 00:20:16,200 --> 00:20:20,800 she prepares this huge, a massive feast, 440 00:20:20,800 --> 00:20:21,880 this huge banquet. 441 00:20:21,880 --> 00:20:23,480 She says, get it already. 442 00:20:23,480 --> 00:20:24,880 We're gonna deliver it. 443 00:20:24,880 --> 00:20:28,600 It's kind of the ancient Uber. 444 00:20:28,600 --> 00:20:31,080 She's going to deliver it to David. 445 00:20:31,080 --> 00:20:34,880 And so they put all of this food on these donkeys 446 00:20:34,880 --> 00:20:38,400 and she goes out riding out with the food. 447 00:20:38,400 --> 00:20:41,400 Now let's look on here at verse 28, 448 00:20:41,400 --> 00:20:44,800 and we'll see how she responds to David. 449 00:20:44,800 --> 00:20:47,640 She meets David and these 400 armed men 450 00:20:47,640 --> 00:20:49,640 coming down the mountainside. 451 00:20:49,640 --> 00:20:53,440 And in between a city of a bunch of innocent people 452 00:20:53,440 --> 00:20:56,880 and a 400 murderous rough riders, 453 00:20:56,880 --> 00:20:58,960 she meets them, she bows to the earth. 454 00:20:58,960 --> 00:21:02,120 And in verse 28, she says to David, 455 00:21:02,120 --> 00:21:06,760 I pray thee, forgive the trespass of thine handmade 456 00:21:06,760 --> 00:21:10,760 for the Lord will certainly make my Lord a sure house 457 00:21:10,760 --> 00:21:14,760 because my Lord fighteth the battles of thee, Lord. 458 00:21:14,760 --> 00:21:19,760 And evil hath not been found in all thy days. 459 00:21:19,880 --> 00:21:23,320 Yet a man is risen to pursue thee and to seek thy soul, 460 00:21:23,320 --> 00:21:25,920 but the soul of my Lord shall be bound 461 00:21:25,920 --> 00:21:29,960 in the bundle of life with thee, Lord, thy God. 462 00:21:29,960 --> 00:21:33,480 And the souls of thy enemies shall he sling out 463 00:21:33,480 --> 00:21:35,800 as in the middle of a sling. 464 00:21:35,800 --> 00:21:40,040 And it shall come to pass when the Lord hath done to my Lord 465 00:21:40,040 --> 00:21:44,240 according to all the good that he hath spoken concerning thee 466 00:21:44,240 --> 00:21:47,320 and shall have appointed thee ruler over Israel, 467 00:21:47,320 --> 00:21:51,240 that this shall be no grief unto thee, 468 00:21:51,240 --> 00:21:53,920 nor offense of heart unto my Lord, 469 00:21:53,920 --> 00:21:58,240 either that thou hast shed blood causeless, 470 00:21:58,240 --> 00:22:01,680 or that my Lord hath avenged himself, 471 00:22:01,680 --> 00:22:04,760 but when the Lord shall have dealt well with my Lord, 472 00:22:04,760 --> 00:22:07,400 then remember thine handmade. 473 00:22:07,400 --> 00:22:11,800 Abigail in a stroke of genius decides to meet him 474 00:22:11,800 --> 00:22:14,400 and his hungry men with this huge platter. 475 00:22:14,400 --> 00:22:19,400 She falls to the earth and she gives this wonderfully, 476 00:22:20,360 --> 00:22:21,920 I don't know if she rehearsed this, 477 00:22:21,920 --> 00:22:25,080 but it was a wonderful speech to David, 478 00:22:25,080 --> 00:22:29,160 highlighting his life, highlighting what she knows about him, 479 00:22:29,160 --> 00:22:31,800 how he has been anointed to be the next king, 480 00:22:31,800 --> 00:22:35,480 highlighting his battle with Goliath, 481 00:22:35,480 --> 00:22:40,200 highlighting how God has his hand of favor over David. 482 00:22:40,200 --> 00:22:45,200 And she says, I don't want you to mess it all up, David. 483 00:22:45,440 --> 00:22:50,120 I don't want you to get to the throne and look back 484 00:22:50,120 --> 00:22:55,120 and know what you have done to Nabal and this community. 485 00:22:55,600 --> 00:22:58,040 In her apologies for her foolish husband, 486 00:22:58,040 --> 00:23:01,040 Abigail wisely reminds David of the folly 487 00:23:01,040 --> 00:23:04,000 that would be unleashed upon him and his household, 488 00:23:04,000 --> 00:23:06,640 if he were to go through with his plan. 489 00:23:06,640 --> 00:23:08,720 Look back again at verse 30 and 31. 490 00:23:08,720 --> 00:23:12,600 She says, it shall come to pass when the Lord shall have done 491 00:23:12,600 --> 00:23:15,800 to my Lord, that's David, according to all the good 492 00:23:15,800 --> 00:23:17,400 that he have spoken concerning thee, 493 00:23:17,400 --> 00:23:19,360 have appointed thee ruler over Israel. 494 00:23:19,360 --> 00:23:21,840 She says, when you get to be king, David, 495 00:23:21,840 --> 00:23:24,320 I know what God's done, we've heard it, 496 00:23:24,320 --> 00:23:25,840 God's put his hand upon you 497 00:23:25,840 --> 00:23:27,840 and you are going to be the next king. 498 00:23:27,840 --> 00:23:30,560 When you get to that position, David, 499 00:23:30,560 --> 00:23:33,240 I don't want you to look back, verse 31, 500 00:23:33,240 --> 00:23:36,440 and remember that you've shed blood causeless 501 00:23:36,440 --> 00:23:38,640 and that you've avenged yourself. 502 00:23:38,640 --> 00:23:41,120 She points out two evils 503 00:23:41,120 --> 00:23:43,600 that he would have been guilty of doing. 504 00:23:43,600 --> 00:23:47,320 Murder and a causeless murder, that's verse 31, 505 00:23:47,320 --> 00:23:50,240 shed blood causeless and vengeance, 506 00:23:50,240 --> 00:23:53,400 the Lord that my Lord had to avenge himself, 507 00:23:53,400 --> 00:23:54,440 talking of David. 508 00:23:55,680 --> 00:23:58,000 These two things, murder and vengeance. 509 00:23:58,000 --> 00:24:00,400 This murder here, or what the Bible would refer to 510 00:24:00,400 --> 00:24:04,840 as blood guilt, was something that's kind of all throughout 511 00:24:04,840 --> 00:24:07,600 the Old Testament, it pervades all the sources, 512 00:24:07,600 --> 00:24:09,160 legal, narrative, cultic. 513 00:24:09,160 --> 00:24:12,360 It's the very, we're very first introduced to this idea 514 00:24:12,360 --> 00:24:15,000 of blood guilt in Genesis chapter four, 515 00:24:15,000 --> 00:24:19,200 when the Bible says that Abel's blood calls out 516 00:24:19,200 --> 00:24:20,960 from the ground. 517 00:24:20,960 --> 00:24:25,960 This kind of blood guilt, taking a life without cause, 518 00:24:26,160 --> 00:24:29,160 is something that throughout the Old Testament 519 00:24:29,160 --> 00:24:32,600 was punishable many times multi-generationally. 520 00:24:32,600 --> 00:24:35,760 God would oftentimes punish an entire generation 521 00:24:35,760 --> 00:24:40,240 or entire legacy of people because of this kind of sin. 522 00:24:40,240 --> 00:24:43,520 And life was so important. 523 00:24:43,520 --> 00:24:45,280 There's such a big deal still as today. 524 00:24:45,280 --> 00:24:47,480 Life is a big deal to God. 525 00:24:47,480 --> 00:24:50,880 And those who are quick to shed innocent blood, 526 00:24:50,880 --> 00:24:53,960 I believe will be avenged by God himself, 527 00:24:53,960 --> 00:24:55,960 even in our culture today. 528 00:24:55,960 --> 00:24:57,800 But I wanna say to you that God, 529 00:24:57,800 --> 00:25:00,080 it's been a big deal from the very beginning. 530 00:25:00,080 --> 00:25:02,720 Life has been a very big deal to God from the very beginning. 531 00:25:02,720 --> 00:25:05,360 In fact, in Deuteronomy chapter 25, 532 00:25:05,360 --> 00:25:08,880 there are specific laws related to the shedding 533 00:25:08,880 --> 00:25:10,680 of innocent blood. 534 00:25:10,680 --> 00:25:15,680 God provides some interesting thought 535 00:25:15,840 --> 00:25:17,480 in Deuteronomy chapter 25. 536 00:25:17,480 --> 00:25:20,320 It's very clear that God decided that if you were going 537 00:25:20,320 --> 00:25:21,560 to shed innocent blood, 538 00:25:21,560 --> 00:25:24,680 you would be guilty of capital punishment. 539 00:25:24,680 --> 00:25:28,640 So much so that if you actually killed somebody accidentally, 540 00:25:28,640 --> 00:25:33,080 you would still be liable for capital punishment. 541 00:25:33,080 --> 00:25:38,080 But in order to allow for grace in the Old Testament, 542 00:25:38,080 --> 00:25:41,400 the Old Testament, God provided six cities, 543 00:25:41,400 --> 00:25:44,000 what we call, we're all cities of refuge 544 00:25:44,000 --> 00:25:47,520 where you could escape to if you accidentally killed somebody. 545 00:25:47,520 --> 00:25:50,360 Now, if you didn't get to that city in time 546 00:25:50,360 --> 00:25:55,360 and someone killed you to pay you back basically 547 00:25:55,600 --> 00:25:58,360 to balance the scales, that was okay. 548 00:25:58,360 --> 00:25:59,760 That was capital punishment. 549 00:25:59,760 --> 00:26:01,400 But if you were able to escape 550 00:26:01,400 --> 00:26:03,200 to one of these cities of refuge, 551 00:26:03,200 --> 00:26:05,200 the Bible says that you were allowed to stay there, 552 00:26:05,200 --> 00:26:07,000 you couldn't leave the city 553 00:26:07,000 --> 00:26:09,760 and you had to wait until the high priest died 554 00:26:09,760 --> 00:26:13,000 and then you would be absolved of that blood guilt. 555 00:26:13,000 --> 00:26:18,000 That was just God demonstrating that he took life seriously. 556 00:26:18,000 --> 00:26:21,120 Now, there was also a thing in Deuteronomy chapter 25 557 00:26:21,120 --> 00:26:23,520 known as the unknown blood guilt clause. 558 00:26:23,520 --> 00:26:25,760 And so what would happen is that the Bible says 559 00:26:25,760 --> 00:26:28,480 that if somebody was found dead 560 00:26:28,480 --> 00:26:30,520 and nobody knew what happened, 561 00:26:30,520 --> 00:26:33,000 there still needed to be reparation. 562 00:26:33,000 --> 00:26:36,040 And so what would happen is that God says 563 00:26:36,040 --> 00:26:39,440 you would call out the Levitical priests 564 00:26:39,440 --> 00:26:42,640 of the nearest towns and they would literally measure 565 00:26:42,640 --> 00:26:45,960 how far their town was from the dead body. 566 00:26:45,960 --> 00:26:48,440 And whoever's town was closest, 567 00:26:48,440 --> 00:26:52,800 that town had to provide a heifer, a cow 568 00:26:52,800 --> 00:26:57,160 that had never been used and had never been used to plow. 569 00:26:57,160 --> 00:26:58,480 It was a brand new cow 570 00:26:58,480 --> 00:27:01,880 and you would have to take the cow out to that spot, 571 00:27:01,880 --> 00:27:03,400 sacrifice the cow. 572 00:27:03,400 --> 00:27:05,240 They'd have to ritually wash their hands 573 00:27:05,240 --> 00:27:07,520 and beg God to forgive them 574 00:27:07,520 --> 00:27:10,080 and not hold that blood guilty against them. 575 00:27:10,080 --> 00:27:14,080 That's how serious God was when it came to this blood guilt, 576 00:27:14,080 --> 00:27:16,280 this murder in the Old Testament. 577 00:27:16,280 --> 00:27:20,360 And this is what David was going to be found guilty of 578 00:27:20,360 --> 00:27:24,840 if Abigail had not stopped, stepped in and spoken to him 579 00:27:24,840 --> 00:27:29,840 if she had not listened to her servant 580 00:27:31,320 --> 00:27:34,040 and brought that reminder to David. 581 00:27:34,040 --> 00:27:35,640 Personal vengeance, you might think, 582 00:27:35,640 --> 00:27:36,960 well, that's kind of a weird one. 583 00:27:36,960 --> 00:27:40,200 God had a really big emphasis, 584 00:27:40,200 --> 00:27:42,600 a whole entire chapter about blood guilt. 585 00:27:42,600 --> 00:27:44,960 That makes sense, but vengeance, she brings up, 586 00:27:44,960 --> 00:27:47,360 she says you'd be guilty of two things, David, 587 00:27:47,360 --> 00:27:50,240 killing without a cause, blood causelessly 588 00:27:50,240 --> 00:27:52,200 and the Lord hath avenged himself. 589 00:27:52,200 --> 00:27:53,600 What is that all about? 590 00:27:53,600 --> 00:27:56,800 Well, this one's related to blood guilt in a way 591 00:27:56,800 --> 00:28:01,240 because a lot of times blood guilt was established 592 00:28:01,240 --> 00:28:03,400 because of someone's personal vengeance. 593 00:28:03,400 --> 00:28:05,760 Somebody got mad and then somebody killed somebody. 594 00:28:05,760 --> 00:28:07,320 That was kind of how they were. 595 00:28:07,320 --> 00:28:08,720 It kind of worked hand in hand. 596 00:28:08,720 --> 00:28:11,160 And oftentimes the vehicle for blood guilt 597 00:28:11,160 --> 00:28:14,880 was one person's choice to circumvent the will 598 00:28:14,880 --> 00:28:19,880 and the plan of God and retaliate to a point of killing. 599 00:28:19,880 --> 00:28:23,440 So David would have not only been impious by doing this, 600 00:28:23,440 --> 00:28:26,440 but also would be close to blasphemous at this time, 601 00:28:26,440 --> 00:28:29,560 believing that he was above God's will 602 00:28:29,560 --> 00:28:31,520 in taking the life of somebody 603 00:28:31,520 --> 00:28:35,160 and personally seeking vengeance. 604 00:28:35,160 --> 00:28:39,160 A quick wick birthed by wise choices of listening up 605 00:28:39,160 --> 00:28:44,160 by Abigail ends up saving David from a great fall. 606 00:28:44,560 --> 00:28:49,560 Proverbs 11, 14 says, where no council is, the people fall. 607 00:28:49,960 --> 00:28:54,520 But in the multitude of counselors, there is safety. 608 00:28:54,520 --> 00:28:57,280 My wife and I were blessed to be able to go away 609 00:28:57,280 --> 00:29:00,760 for a few days this last week into Amish country 610 00:29:00,760 --> 00:29:05,040 and for about a day and a half we sat through sessions, 611 00:29:05,040 --> 00:29:08,440 listening to a biblical counselor talk about the importance 612 00:29:08,440 --> 00:29:11,560 of counsel and biblical counseling for teenagers 613 00:29:11,560 --> 00:29:13,120 and for children. 614 00:29:13,120 --> 00:29:17,240 And the importance of how the word of God is used 615 00:29:17,240 --> 00:29:20,640 to help change someone's heart 616 00:29:20,640 --> 00:29:24,320 because that is where real change happens. 617 00:29:24,320 --> 00:29:27,920 Because a lot of times when we deal with counsel, 618 00:29:27,920 --> 00:29:32,000 a lot of times counselors try to change just the surface level. 619 00:29:32,000 --> 00:29:34,280 They try to change the behavior of somebody, 620 00:29:34,280 --> 00:29:36,560 stop doing bad things, start doing good things 621 00:29:36,560 --> 00:29:39,960 and they never really get down to someone's desires 622 00:29:39,960 --> 00:29:41,320 and their beliefs. 623 00:29:41,320 --> 00:29:43,400 And in the all times don't use the word of God 624 00:29:43,400 --> 00:29:47,400 to change those to produce the good fruit. 625 00:29:47,400 --> 00:29:51,120 He used an illustration of how if when he was teaching 626 00:29:51,120 --> 00:29:52,440 he'd have somebody bring in a tree 627 00:29:52,440 --> 00:29:53,800 and he'd set the tree on the stage 628 00:29:53,800 --> 00:29:55,560 and he'd say, I'm gonna take this banana, 629 00:29:55,560 --> 00:29:57,640 I'm gonna tape this banana to the tree 630 00:29:57,640 --> 00:29:59,360 and he'd leave it there for a few days 631 00:29:59,360 --> 00:30:00,480 and what would happen? 632 00:30:00,480 --> 00:30:03,520 The banana would begin to rot 633 00:30:03,520 --> 00:30:07,400 because that fruit was not part of that tree. 634 00:30:07,400 --> 00:30:09,360 And that's a lot of times when we counsel, 635 00:30:09,360 --> 00:30:11,640 we don't use the word of God, that's what happens. 636 00:30:11,640 --> 00:30:15,720 We try to change someone's behavior, the fruit, 637 00:30:15,720 --> 00:30:18,520 without changing the root. 638 00:30:18,520 --> 00:30:21,400 He also reminded us the importance of self counsel, 639 00:30:21,400 --> 00:30:24,440 using the word of God to counsel yourself. 640 00:30:24,440 --> 00:30:29,440 Now interesting enough, one of the most clear representations 641 00:30:30,400 --> 00:30:34,920 we see in the Old Testament of someone counseling themselves 642 00:30:34,920 --> 00:30:38,280 with truth from the word of God is David. 643 00:30:38,280 --> 00:30:40,800 Predominantly Psalm 42 verse five, 644 00:30:40,800 --> 00:30:44,080 David says, why art thou cast down on my soul? 645 00:30:44,080 --> 00:30:46,040 Why art thou disquieted in me? 646 00:30:46,040 --> 00:30:51,040 Hope thou in God for I shall yet praise him 647 00:30:51,000 --> 00:30:53,240 for the help of his countenance. 648 00:30:53,240 --> 00:30:58,240 Counsel is important, especially when there's conflict. 649 00:30:59,440 --> 00:31:01,560 And if we're going to deal with conflict 650 00:31:01,560 --> 00:31:06,080 a way that honors God, we must, when conflict arise, 651 00:31:06,080 --> 00:31:09,720 listen up, we must seek Godly counsel 652 00:31:09,720 --> 00:31:14,720 and seek counsel from God's word on how to deal with it. 653 00:31:14,840 --> 00:31:17,400 Let's keep going, when conflict arises number three, 654 00:31:17,400 --> 00:31:19,800 we must learn to peer in. 655 00:31:19,800 --> 00:31:24,800 We must learn to look inside and see what God is doing 656 00:31:24,840 --> 00:31:27,240 in our hearts during this conflict. 657 00:31:27,240 --> 00:31:30,760 Verse 32, let's continue with the narrative. 658 00:31:30,760 --> 00:31:33,640 Verse 32, David says to Abigail, 659 00:31:33,640 --> 00:31:35,640 blessed be the Lord God of Israel, 660 00:31:35,640 --> 00:31:38,080 which sent thee this day to me, 661 00:31:38,080 --> 00:31:41,920 and blessed be thy advice, and blessed be thou, 662 00:31:41,920 --> 00:31:45,720 which has kept me this day from coming to shed blood, 663 00:31:45,720 --> 00:31:50,360 and from avenging myself with mine own hand. 664 00:31:50,360 --> 00:31:52,200 After that influential discussion, 665 00:31:52,200 --> 00:31:54,600 after the counsel that's heated from Abigail, 666 00:31:54,600 --> 00:31:59,600 from her own steward, now Abigail's counsel 667 00:32:00,040 --> 00:32:02,200 is being heated by David. 668 00:32:02,200 --> 00:32:05,520 And David takes a moment to compose himself, 669 00:32:05,520 --> 00:32:10,520 to slow down, to listen up, and now he begins to peer in. 670 00:32:10,680 --> 00:32:14,040 He knows that this woman was used by God 671 00:32:14,040 --> 00:32:19,040 and allowed by God to bring him much needed counsel. 672 00:32:19,040 --> 00:32:22,040 He uses the word blessed three times here 673 00:32:22,040 --> 00:32:23,320 in these two verses. 674 00:32:23,320 --> 00:32:26,800 That Hebrew word, blessed, means to kneel before. 675 00:32:28,000 --> 00:32:31,480 He says, blessed be the God of Israel. 676 00:32:31,480 --> 00:32:34,760 As David peers in, he begins to understand that David, 677 00:32:34,760 --> 00:32:36,880 David understands that the sovereignty of God 678 00:32:36,880 --> 00:32:39,120 in this situation, that God is the one 679 00:32:39,120 --> 00:32:40,960 who's allowed this to happen, 680 00:32:40,960 --> 00:32:44,640 that God has allowed this woman to stop him 681 00:32:44,640 --> 00:32:47,720 from this foolishness and give him a chance 682 00:32:47,720 --> 00:32:52,680 to cool down, listen up, and peer in. 683 00:32:52,680 --> 00:32:56,760 He also says, blessed be thy advice. 684 00:32:56,760 --> 00:33:00,040 David understands the impact of wise counsel 685 00:33:00,040 --> 00:33:03,400 in his own life, and he says blessed be thou. 686 00:33:03,400 --> 00:33:08,400 David understands that even this agent of reproof 687 00:33:08,400 --> 00:33:11,200 is something that God has delivered to him 688 00:33:11,200 --> 00:33:14,960 to help save him from foolishness 689 00:33:14,960 --> 00:33:18,040 and from catastrophe in his life. 690 00:33:18,040 --> 00:33:21,760 These two verses here show the inward change of heart 691 00:33:21,760 --> 00:33:25,480 that David has, which manifests in his stay 692 00:33:25,480 --> 00:33:27,240 of illegitimate execution. 693 00:33:27,240 --> 00:33:29,880 From this point on, David does not continue, 694 00:33:29,880 --> 00:33:34,120 and he does not continue with his desire to kill anybody. 695 00:33:35,320 --> 00:33:38,080 But I wanna point out here this incredible 180 696 00:33:38,080 --> 00:33:40,960 that happens in David's heart after he decides 697 00:33:40,960 --> 00:33:44,040 to stop, to listen up, and to peer in. 698 00:33:44,040 --> 00:33:48,880 You see, it's part of God's plan for holiness 699 00:33:48,880 --> 00:33:51,120 and righteousness in the church 700 00:33:51,120 --> 00:33:54,680 that reproof be part of the Christian experience, 701 00:33:54,680 --> 00:33:58,240 that reproof be part of the church experience. 702 00:33:58,240 --> 00:34:01,520 In fact, Paul says to his son in the ministry, 703 00:34:01,520 --> 00:34:06,440 Timothy, as a pastor, I want you to reproof, 704 00:34:06,440 --> 00:34:08,160 to rebuke. 705 00:34:08,160 --> 00:34:10,280 It's part of scripture's profitability 706 00:34:10,280 --> 00:34:13,720 in Timothy chapter three, verse 16, right? 707 00:34:13,720 --> 00:34:14,920 All scripture is given by inspiration 708 00:34:14,920 --> 00:34:19,560 of God's profitable for doctrine and for reproof. 709 00:34:19,560 --> 00:34:21,240 What is reproof? 710 00:34:21,240 --> 00:34:25,240 Well, reproof is the biblical practice of gentle correction 711 00:34:25,240 --> 00:34:29,880 and redirection towards God's intended plan for our life. 712 00:34:29,880 --> 00:34:34,880 It's part of God's plan to keep his church holy and righteous. 713 00:34:34,880 --> 00:34:38,640 And a believer, as a believer, we need to be willing 714 00:34:38,640 --> 00:34:43,400 to receive reproof the way that David received it here 715 00:34:43,400 --> 00:34:44,800 from Abigail. 716 00:34:44,800 --> 00:34:47,480 But oftentimes, that's not the case that we see. 717 00:34:47,480 --> 00:34:49,680 Oftentimes, if we are not careful, 718 00:34:49,680 --> 00:34:54,400 we allow our hearts to become bitter, 719 00:34:54,400 --> 00:34:56,680 to become pompous, to become prideful. 720 00:34:56,680 --> 00:35:00,200 And when someone comes to us with a word of reproof, 721 00:35:00,200 --> 00:35:02,920 we decide, you know what, it's just a lot easier 722 00:35:02,920 --> 00:35:06,920 to just go down to the next church and to run away from that. 723 00:35:06,920 --> 00:35:10,280 But I'm telling you, reproof is a biblical practice 724 00:35:10,280 --> 00:35:13,040 that needs to happen in our church. 725 00:35:13,040 --> 00:35:15,480 It's not a way of judgment, being judgmental 726 00:35:15,480 --> 00:35:16,840 towards somebody else. 727 00:35:16,840 --> 00:35:20,840 It is a gentle correction towards God's intended path 728 00:35:20,840 --> 00:35:23,840 for our lives. 729 00:35:23,840 --> 00:35:27,800 And when we are unwilling to listen to reproof 730 00:35:27,800 --> 00:35:30,480 and we would rather choose to play victim, 731 00:35:30,480 --> 00:35:34,000 we'd rather choose to escape to another church in town, 732 00:35:34,000 --> 00:35:39,000 we are destroying what God wants to do in our own life 733 00:35:39,000 --> 00:35:40,680 and in this church. 734 00:35:40,680 --> 00:35:43,400 There are consequences when we choose not to listen. 735 00:35:44,760 --> 00:35:47,560 And I heard this story recently in the early 1920s, 736 00:35:47,560 --> 00:35:50,160 there was a guy named Alman Shroger. 737 00:35:50,160 --> 00:35:52,400 I don't know if you've ever heard of this guy before. 738 00:35:52,400 --> 00:35:56,160 He was an undertaker in Indiana, 739 00:35:56,160 --> 00:35:58,400 and he was also an inventor. 740 00:35:58,400 --> 00:36:02,280 In the early 1920s, there was what was called 741 00:36:02,280 --> 00:36:03,720 switchboard operators. 742 00:36:03,720 --> 00:36:05,120 And so for some of the younger kids, 743 00:36:05,120 --> 00:36:06,160 when you used to make a phone call, 744 00:36:06,160 --> 00:36:07,560 you used to pick up a receiver, 745 00:36:07,560 --> 00:36:09,360 this is before my time, I had to do some study, 746 00:36:09,360 --> 00:36:10,760 you picked up the receiver 747 00:36:10,760 --> 00:36:13,960 and somebody would ask you a question, okay? 748 00:36:13,960 --> 00:36:16,120 And what you'd do is you'd give them the number 749 00:36:16,120 --> 00:36:19,520 and then they would physically take a cable out of a wall 750 00:36:19,520 --> 00:36:21,520 and put it into another place in the wall 751 00:36:21,520 --> 00:36:23,320 and that would connect the phone lines. 752 00:36:23,320 --> 00:36:25,240 That's how phone calls used to be made 753 00:36:25,240 --> 00:36:27,520 before cell phones and cell phone towers. 754 00:36:27,520 --> 00:36:30,800 So the lady that was the switchboard operator 755 00:36:30,800 --> 00:36:33,800 in Alman's town was the wife 756 00:36:33,800 --> 00:36:36,960 of the only other undertaker in town. 757 00:36:36,960 --> 00:36:39,640 And so when somebody would call and ask for Alman 758 00:36:39,640 --> 00:36:41,440 in his undertaker practice, 759 00:36:41,440 --> 00:36:43,440 this lady would take the phone 760 00:36:43,440 --> 00:36:46,040 and connect it to her husband's practice 761 00:36:46,040 --> 00:36:47,920 and he would swipe the client. 762 00:36:47,920 --> 00:36:52,560 And so obviously that necessity birthed an invention. 763 00:36:52,560 --> 00:36:56,040 And what he invented was called the automated switchboard. 764 00:36:56,040 --> 00:36:59,480 What he decided is he decided to include some circuits 765 00:36:59,480 --> 00:37:02,800 and a rotary dial that you could use yourself, 766 00:37:02,800 --> 00:37:04,800 and this was also again before me, 767 00:37:04,800 --> 00:37:08,840 but there was a type of phone where you would spin the numbers 768 00:37:08,840 --> 00:37:12,800 and they would automatically move a computerized, 769 00:37:12,800 --> 00:37:15,360 well not computerized, but a digitized board 770 00:37:15,360 --> 00:37:17,560 and you would be able to connect the phone call yourself. 771 00:37:17,560 --> 00:37:22,560 And this guy came up with that invention. 772 00:37:22,760 --> 00:37:24,280 And it began to sweep the nation, right? 773 00:37:24,280 --> 00:37:27,720 In the 30s and 40s, automatic switchboard operators, 774 00:37:27,720 --> 00:37:30,840 or switchboard operators became non-necessary. 775 00:37:30,840 --> 00:37:33,440 They would install these automated switchboards. 776 00:37:33,440 --> 00:37:38,440 And what happened was that close to 178,000 people 777 00:37:39,520 --> 00:37:42,320 that were women who were working in the United States 778 00:37:42,320 --> 00:37:46,200 lost their jobs because they were all put out of business 779 00:37:46,200 --> 00:37:48,000 by this piece of technology. 780 00:37:48,000 --> 00:37:52,880 And so this guy came up with this invention 781 00:37:52,880 --> 00:37:56,880 and thousands of women who were emerging out of the home 782 00:37:56,880 --> 00:38:00,640 at this time in the early 20s, 30s, and 40s, 783 00:38:00,640 --> 00:38:04,000 finding a new place, a new path in the workforce, 784 00:38:04,000 --> 00:38:08,240 it derailed hundreds of thousands of young women's careers 785 00:38:08,240 --> 00:38:11,840 and all of them were in the same business. 786 00:38:11,840 --> 00:38:13,800 And this guy came up with this invention 787 00:38:13,800 --> 00:38:16,240 and thousands of women who were emerging 788 00:38:16,240 --> 00:38:21,240 and honestly, it's hard to say the impact 789 00:38:21,680 --> 00:38:25,960 that had on for women in America. 790 00:38:25,960 --> 00:38:28,360 But I say all that to say, 791 00:38:30,720 --> 00:38:33,000 that can translate into the church. 792 00:38:33,880 --> 00:38:37,320 When one person decides they're not going to listen 793 00:38:37,320 --> 00:38:41,360 to reproof, when they would rather harden their heart, 794 00:38:41,360 --> 00:38:43,040 when they would rather say, you know what, 795 00:38:43,040 --> 00:38:45,000 it's a lot easier to just not deal with this, 796 00:38:45,000 --> 00:38:47,080 I'll just go down the street to another church. 797 00:38:47,080 --> 00:38:52,080 There can be unintended consequences for the local church. 798 00:38:52,800 --> 00:38:55,800 Reprove is part of the Christian experience. 799 00:38:55,800 --> 00:38:57,560 As one Scottish commenter put it, 800 00:38:57,560 --> 00:39:01,360 it's a mark of sincere and genuine godliness 801 00:39:01,360 --> 00:39:05,000 to not be less thankful for being kept from sinning 802 00:39:05,000 --> 00:39:08,480 than from being rescued from suffering. 803 00:39:08,480 --> 00:39:10,600 A mark of maturity, I believe in Christ, 804 00:39:10,600 --> 00:39:14,440 is the ability to peer in in the face of conflict, 805 00:39:14,440 --> 00:39:17,800 examining ourselves and our responses 806 00:39:17,800 --> 00:39:20,000 rather than the problem at hand. 807 00:39:20,000 --> 00:39:23,680 Many times that happens when godly reproof 808 00:39:23,680 --> 00:39:26,080 is part of the local church. 809 00:39:26,080 --> 00:39:27,480 Number four, we're running out of time. 810 00:39:27,480 --> 00:39:31,120 When conflict arises, we must learn to look out. 811 00:39:31,120 --> 00:39:33,280 Now I don't mean look out for pots and pans 812 00:39:33,280 --> 00:39:36,080 flying across the house or chairs. 813 00:39:36,080 --> 00:39:37,560 That's not what I mean by looking out. 814 00:39:37,560 --> 00:39:40,520 I mean, look at what God is doing. 815 00:39:40,520 --> 00:39:43,760 As one pastor put it, don't look at what's happening 816 00:39:43,760 --> 00:39:46,640 around you, look what's happening in you. 817 00:39:48,800 --> 00:39:52,720 David and Abigail's conversation between this time 818 00:39:52,720 --> 00:39:54,560 and the twist that we're gonna look at in here 819 00:39:54,560 --> 00:39:57,160 in just a minute, Nibble throws a party. 820 00:39:57,160 --> 00:39:59,600 He demonstrates just how foolish he is. 821 00:39:59,600 --> 00:40:03,040 He throws this huge party, Bible says that he gets drunk. 822 00:40:03,040 --> 00:40:06,880 The next day he wakes up and Abigail says to him, Nibble, 823 00:40:06,880 --> 00:40:08,160 I wanna let you know about something 824 00:40:08,160 --> 00:40:09,360 that happened yesterday. 825 00:40:09,360 --> 00:40:13,120 David and those 600 men that had been protecting 826 00:40:13,120 --> 00:40:16,480 your investment, they came here to kill you. 827 00:40:16,480 --> 00:40:17,760 But I stopped them. 828 00:40:18,880 --> 00:40:23,200 And the Bible says in verse 37 that when Nibble heard 829 00:40:23,200 --> 00:40:27,680 those words, the Bible says that his heart died within him 830 00:40:27,680 --> 00:40:29,960 and he became as stone. 831 00:40:29,960 --> 00:40:34,960 Verse 38 says 10 days later, the Lord smote Nibble. 832 00:40:34,960 --> 00:40:39,960 David did not take vengeance, but God did. 833 00:40:40,960 --> 00:40:43,280 And here's the twist, verse 39. 834 00:40:43,280 --> 00:40:47,280 39 says when David heard that Nibble was dead, 835 00:40:47,280 --> 00:40:50,960 he said, bless be the Lord that hath pleaded the cause 836 00:40:50,960 --> 00:40:53,680 of my reproach from the hand of Nibble 837 00:40:53,680 --> 00:40:56,240 and hath kept his servant from evil. 838 00:40:56,240 --> 00:40:59,280 For the Lord hath returned the wickedness of Nibble 839 00:40:59,280 --> 00:41:03,280 upon his own head and David sent and communed with Abigail 840 00:41:03,280 --> 00:41:06,080 to take her to him, to wife. 841 00:41:07,360 --> 00:41:12,360 David sends a proposal to Abigail, Abigail accepts. 842 00:41:12,720 --> 00:41:15,440 And the Bible says that she comes with her entourage 843 00:41:15,440 --> 00:41:17,120 and they're married. 844 00:41:17,120 --> 00:41:19,680 Later on in scripture we find out in 2 Samuel, 845 00:41:19,680 --> 00:41:22,240 they have a child, one child together. 846 00:41:22,240 --> 00:41:25,120 And actually in scripture, two different places, 847 00:41:25,120 --> 00:41:26,480 he's named two different things. 848 00:41:26,480 --> 00:41:28,480 And I think I just wanted to point it out. 849 00:41:28,480 --> 00:41:32,480 In 2 Samuel chapter three, their child is named David. 850 00:41:32,480 --> 00:41:34,960 His child is named Kilab, 851 00:41:34,960 --> 00:41:38,240 which means the restraint of the father. 852 00:41:38,240 --> 00:41:43,200 After David listened up, he slowed down, he peered in, 853 00:41:43,200 --> 00:41:47,520 he looked out, he decided to make the right decision. 854 00:41:47,520 --> 00:41:51,920 His hand was stayed, he restrained from killing the ball 855 00:41:51,920 --> 00:41:55,160 and he was innocent of blood guilt. 856 00:41:55,160 --> 00:41:57,040 The second name of this child, 857 00:41:57,040 --> 00:41:58,560 the second name is given to this child 858 00:41:58,560 --> 00:42:00,560 is in 1 Chronicles chapter three. 859 00:42:00,560 --> 00:42:03,840 It's the word Daniel, which means God is my judge, 860 00:42:03,840 --> 00:42:06,640 pointing towards God's vengeance on the ball 861 00:42:06,640 --> 00:42:10,400 rather than David taking vengeance upon himself. 862 00:42:10,400 --> 00:42:13,360 When conflict arises, we have to learn to look out 863 00:42:13,360 --> 00:42:16,080 because when something is happening, 864 00:42:16,080 --> 00:42:20,720 it's not happening to us, it's happening for us. 865 00:42:20,720 --> 00:42:25,200 God allows conflict into our lives to sharpen us 866 00:42:25,200 --> 00:42:28,560 and to help us be more like him. 867 00:42:28,560 --> 00:42:32,000 One pastor said it this way, in the toughest times, 868 00:42:32,000 --> 00:42:35,440 the hardest conversations, the most painful relationship 869 00:42:35,440 --> 00:42:40,080 tensions is when the light of grace shines brightest 870 00:42:40,080 --> 00:42:47,040 and transforms us most into his son's likeness. 871 00:42:47,040 --> 00:42:49,120 Conflict is inevitable. 872 00:42:49,120 --> 00:42:54,720 People are not going to stop putting pineapples on their pizza. 873 00:42:54,720 --> 00:42:58,160 But I want to tell you that we can respond the right way 874 00:42:58,160 --> 00:43:00,160 when conflict arises. 875 00:43:00,160 --> 00:43:05,600 We can learn to slow down, to listen up, 876 00:43:05,600 --> 00:43:13,200 to peer in and look out and honor God with how we respond. 877 00:43:13,200 --> 00:43:29,200 Would you bow your heads?