Welcome to the God's Goodness podcast, where our mission is to encourage as well as highlight
God's Goodness and modern-day miracles.
We are your hosts, Josh and Shelly Hankins.
Today we have with us a very special couple.
With us, they go to our church with us.
They're actually pastors.
Both of them are like what an honor.
How cool is that?
A couple of pastors.
And their names are Brianna and Luke Walden.
And the Holy Spirit led them to be on this episode.
And they are our first couple guest, which is really exciting to me because we didn't
know what the Holy Spirit would lead them to share with everyone.
But what we've been blessed with is they brought a whole outline and they're not going to miss
a thing that the Holy Spirit wanted to share with you.
So they are going to be guided by the Holy Spirit and an outline.
And I just can't wait for their story to be a blessing to others.
And we're going to have them open us with an opening prayer.
Sure.
Well, dear Jesus, we just thank you so much for this day.
Lord, we thank you for the move of your spirit in our lives.
And we thank you for the stories that we get to tell because all of it points back to you
and who you are and your movement in our midst and in the call that you place before us.
So we thank you for what you're doing.
We thank you for what you have done.
And we thank you for what you're going to do.
In Jesus' name we pray.
Amen.
And we thank you for that.
Of course.
Yeah.
I loved your little dance over there at the beginning.
That was so much fun.
It's the only dancing I do this in.
It is.
It's also the same exact dance she does when she's eating food that she really likes.
So with that, where did I start your outline?
Oh, yeah, sure.
Thanks so much for asking us to come on and do this.
This is super exciting.
I know you guys have had some really good guests on here.
Some who talk very, very well.
They're really good at articulating what their testimony and their story have been.
So here's hoping that we can hit the same level that you've had on this.
Oh, yeah.
We're just honored to be here.
So thank you so so much.
Thank you for being with us.
Yeah, absolutely.
So I was thinking, you know, just kind of start up the beginning of like how God kind
of made his prisons known in each of our lives.
And this concept that we look at called like the journey and like where Jesus has taken
us from and where he is kind of like moving us to.
So for me, I know that so I grew up, I went to private school.
I went to a Christian school right out of sight of West Mifflin right next to CCAC called
Wilson Christian Academy.
And so it wasn't like your normal private school.
We kind of got the kids that came from the kind of got kicked out of other schools.
That was just kind of the claim to fame of what it was.
But in the middle of that, they had all of these kids together and they were trying to
teach them not just basic education stuff, right, but also like who Jesus was, how to
follow him and what that looks like.
So we've had we did stuff like chapel every Fridays and we had speakers come in.
So it was awesome.
We had like a little youth group in the middle of our school, which was fun.
And the one moment for me, which I've told this testimony before, but like the moment
that hit for me is I was sitting in a chapel and I couldn't remember this guy's face.
I can't remember his name if you asked me about it, but I do remember what he said.
And he looked at all of us and he asked us this question.
And the question was, when are you going to take ownership of your faith and stop writing
on what your parents believe?
And that question like knocked me off of my seat for the next like three to six months
really is like, I just sat there and had to process that because then came the whole
moment of what is my faith?
Like what is mine?
Do I believe this because my parents told it to me to be true?
Or do I actually take ownership of like who Jesus is and what he's doing?
Like, is he actually Lord or am I following a checklist that my parents had kind of put
in front of me to follow him?
And so after that like wrestling period, I had came around to this conclusion that like,
no, this is my faith.
Like I'm going to take ownership of what Jesus is.
And really at that moment started feeling this like call and burden to ministry wanting
to be involved in this.
I remember even since middle school, but in this moment specifically like praying to
Jesus God, like I'm on worship teams.
I can play music.
I can do instruments.
But like, if you would allow me to be able to do this full time someday, I will devote
like every moment to what you have.
And so we got to that point where Jesus really just kind of solidified himself in my life
after that question that that man asked and coming out of high school.
It was a little difficult because you would think coming from a like a private Christian
high school that there would be like a ton of us who believed and I would have all of
these friends.
But the reality was, I think it was super interesting is that really only two of us out of my class
of 21 not crazy huge, right?
We had 21 in our graduating class compared to I think what?
Right.
Not like 700.
Yeah.
Not like 700, right?
I had 33.
33.
Yes.
You see similar.
You would what?
You know, like yourself.
Totally.
You're like homeschooled all year.
But because I would be I could see that totally.
But out of this small class of like 21, 23 of us, only two of us like still follow up
with like who Jesus is to this day.
And so coming out of high school, I didn't fully have like friends.
I didn't have anyone who I could kind of like talk about God with who I could kind of grow
with.
Like I'm a higher and sharpening iron piece and like the reality is, is you need people
to become sharp.
You need challenge to become like growing and mature and who Jesus is.
Right?
Like he can download whatever he needs to in your life.
But the reality of another person being able to kind of like expedite that process with
you and kind of hold you accountable and sharpen like the blade of your faith.
Like so to speak is of the utmost importance in a believer's life.
Like Christianity is a faith of community.
Like that's like one of the core tenants of what it is.
I think especially in your young adult period as well as you're just stepping out into the
real world.
So to say, and you need people to surround you and pour into you as you're trying to
just find yourself stumbling through like, what am I going to pursue?
Where am I going?
Who am I?
So what a hard moment to look around and say, wow, like I really don't have a lot of solid
Christian friends being able to hold me accountable as I'm trying to just pursue myself into young
adulthood.
Yeah, no, absolutely.
And so that's the dilemma that I found myself in.
And I ended up joining a youth group over at Journey by Grace Church on 51 and started
getting real involved there as far as like leading worship at their youth group on Wednesday
nights and being a part of their Sunday morning services and being brought up as like this
person who's like, hey, well, it's a lead worship and be a part of that.
And one of the last churches that I was at, I come in straight out of high school, I didn't
have any friends.
So I got really involved in their youth group.
And it was invited to start leading worship teams.
And then from there, like started being brought up to being a worship leader in the main service.
And one of the things that actually ended up happening in the middle of all of that is
one of the people, the youth leader that I looked up to, we actually found out that he
was having a relationship with one of my 16 year old friends.
And so that was this earth shattering moment where someone who is supposed to be this like
pillar in your life, you watch them fall from grace in a way that I wish that no one ever
has to watch their leader fall from grace.
And in the middle of that whole moment, we see that God, I this this kid decided, hey,
I'm going to take over the youth group.
Like, and I went to the lead pastor said, let me do it.
And somehow someway he said, sure.
And I found myself as this 18 year old kid like trying to teach the gospel to 16 and 15
year olds, right?
And I was like, it was this really this scenario that I felt very underprepared for and in
reality looking back was very underprepared for.
But that moment sparked something in me to kind of move forward.
And in that time, I actually met because of because of how everything went down.
We actually had a man come to my church, his name's Chris, who is really took me under
his wing and became like my spiritual father for that season.
And it was actually through him that he goes, hey, why don't you come and join me on a Saturday
night and like come lead worship with us.
So I come out and it just so happens that he has like a 21 year old daughter who's my
age who has like three other friends who are all that.
And we are all kind of like, we're all kind of like, I don't even know how to put this
like, we didn't have friends.
Like we didn't have anybody else that that thing that I had been feeling, which was like,
I have nobody around me.
Right?
And like, I met people.
And from there, there was like four of us to start with.
And then we just started like leading worship places.
And we started like studying the Bible together.
And we started like doing conferences and the whole shebang, like going out and really trying
to dive into like, who is God and what are we going to do about it?
And there was a moment where I remember sitting in my parents' basement and we had about six
or seven of us at that time.
And we're like excited on fire, like ready for everything that's like, what is God going
to do?
And someone goes, what are we going to do with our faith?
Not that we have it.
And so this is like a little side piece of my story, but we said, we're going to open
a youth and community center.
We're like, we don't know how we're going to do it, but we're going to open a community
center.
And so we end up actually a couple of years down the road, flying out to Philadelphia and
meeting with this community center called the Grosh.
And they showed us their facilities and everything.
And we look at them and we're like, okay, what do we need to do this?
And they said, you have the people, all you need is a building.
So we go home and we start looking around in over in West Newton, PA, and we find a
building, we find a community, we find a town, and we open up this youth center in the middle
of this city.
And the first year we had like 60 students, 60 kids from the community come over.
I think year two was like what, like a hundred, 130 something like that.
And I think as of this year, and as this is what five years ago that that opened up as
of this year, they have like 230 plus students that they service on like a daily basis.
And the reason I'm telling all of this is because like the progression of the person
I was coming out of high school to God, moving me from place to place to place.
Like, like I thought I had this in my head that like, I'm going to get out of high school
and I'm going to have a bunch of awesome friends and we're going to just travel around and
we're going to tour and we're going to lead worship together.
And that's just what I'm going to do for the rest of my life.
Like this is what I want to do.
And in the middle of that process, right, I found myself in some relationships that really
I gave too much to that I should have never done romantically.
And in the middle of that, I was searching so much for this fulfillment out of another
person that I really should have been looking for in God.
And so it's this moment where like, I'm sitting back and I'm looking around at my life and
my first thing is like, God, I need friends.
I don't have any friends.
He provides friends, right?
And then the second thing was just like, God, I really like, I just want to take care of
someone.
And in the moment, what I wasn't realizing was is that I wasn't ready.
Like I wasn't prepared for that kind of back and forth.
You were willing though.
I was willing.
That's absolutely true.
Far too eager and willing.
Far too eager.
I always had this like want inside of me that like I just, I always wanted to take care
of someone.
Like I had that feeling, but that feeling left unchecked, like leads to the places that God
is like trying to protect you from going.
And so far too willing in a place that like wasn't mature enough, wasn't ready enough
yet, but still on fire for Jesus.
And in the middle of, of this whole, like this young adult stage where you're trying
to find yourself, you're trying to figure out what's going on.
I'm sitting back and I'm, I'm looking in my life and I'm like, I'm like, God, like
I can't do the relationship thing anymore after, after like three relationships that
didn't go well at all.
And I'm like, there was this moment that hit me where I was in the midst of all this great
stuff that God was doing.
I became unhappy because this one thing wasn't the way that I thought it should have been.
And so God's like showing up in worship nights and he's like, he's allowing us to minister
to all of these kids in this neighborhood, in this youth center that we've started.
And in the middle of all of this, like I'm sitting in this moment of unhappiness because
of this one particular thing that God was not like, was not doing for me.
And so it was this moment of like, I sat down and I said, okay, God, like I can't do this
anymore.
And he does what he always does.
And he goes, I know, I've been waiting for you to have that realization.
And I said, like, Lord, like I want to be fully open and available for you, for what
you are trying to do in my life.
And so I said, God, I am not even going to text a female.
I'm not even going to talk to them unless I hear from you that like this is it.
I'm like, I cannot do this again.
Like I cannot be so eager and so invested that I forget the purpose of what you're trying
to do in my life.
And when I actually, when I talk to guys, like that seems to be like this common theme
where we get to this moment where we're like, we just want relationships so bad that we
forget out of the pureness of relationship with Jesus is what comes that connection,
like with someone else.
And I'm not talking like we've got to be attracted to them, right?
We've got to think like they're funny.
There's got to be compatibility.
But the depth of like relationship actually comes from your connection with who God is.
Because if you understand like who he is and what that nature of relationship is, then
you can like reflect that to the person who's right next to you.
But I wasn't ready for that.
I wasn't fully there.
So here it was, I'd come out of high school.
I was serving on worship teams and everything in high school.
He moves me to a church where again, just this man at Chris had took me under his wing.
He starts pouring into me.
The pastors there saw potential in me.
They put me in a position of worship leading.
And then we get to this moment where like God opens up that opportunity to open up this
youth center.
And so that's like another shift that I didn't see coming that he was doing.
And he's pouring into that and making that like a new thing in my life.
And then I thought that was going to be like the end of my story.
Like I was at a moment where I was like, okay, God, I'm done with relationships.
I'm focusing on you.
I'm like, I am going to be running waypoint, which is the name of the youth community center.
I'm going to be running waypoint.
I'm going to be leading worship here and I'm going to go to the barn, which is the church
I was at on Saturday nights.
I said, this is going to be my life.
I'm content.
I'm happy here with you.
And it was when I got to that moment of not my will, but yours, like it's so easy to just
say that, but to actually then like to get to that moment where you're like fully released,
where you're like, nope, like not my will, but yours be done.
Like it switches something around you.
And then God's able to actually take you to that next like level that he's trying to
move you to.
I always talk about him bringing us from glory to glory to glory, but like that next glory
only happens when you're like, okay, like I'm humbly content right here where you have
me.
The flip side of that of the, of like the contentness of where you're at is then when
you get so comfortable and then he starts to pull you out of something, you almost have
this hold on to you.
Like, no, I'm not ready to go yet.
Like this is it.
This is me.
And so I was content.
Like we had this youth center.
It's popping.
It's rolling.
I'm leading worship on Saturdays, doing conferences and all of a sudden one night, I'm leading
worship on a Saturday and none other than this beautiful lady walks into the barn that
we were at on a Saturday night.
And that's kind of where our stories link up.
But the thing that I wanted to talk about was is like the plan that we have in our heads
and what Jesus has for us, it rarely plays out the way that we, we think it's going to
be.
Like, like what's, what's the phrase that, that man lays his plans and God laughs?
Yes.
And that's like, it's true.
Like I don't mean to say this and it'd be like, it's, it's the truest statement that
we can sit here and we can plan out.
And he's like, you think that you have an idea of what's going to happen and you have
no idea how I'm going to move this for you.
Now I do want to caveat.
Like, I also believe in the fact of like prepping and being prepared and using the wisdom and
strategy that he's giving you, because when you do put that work in, he then honors it.
But don't be so solidified in what you think needs to happen that you don't leave room
for his spirit to move.
You know, as you were speaking, I couldn't help but get the mental image of a blacksmith
forging tools, forging a weapon, forging whatever his need is.
Yeah.
Right.
And oftentimes someone may look at it as a finished product.
He throws it right back in the fire.
Yes.
And then calls it out and bangs on it.
He throws it in the water.
Throws it back in the fire and bangs on it, molds it, turns it and tells it's absolutely
perfect.
Yes.
And so many times we think that this is it because we think this is the final product.
Yeah, we think we've arrived.
And he's like, no, no, no, I got some more help to do.
I've got some more tinkering to do.
I've got, I've got to do this rich inlay that I've got plans for you.
You have no idea what the product is going to look like, but just wait.
I can't wait to unleash you on the world.
It's so good.
One of the verses that comes to mind, especially in this season, and this is something that
I've been like wrestling out for the last couple of months, but that verse that says
he's a lamp into our feet and a light into our paths, right?
Like what I've come to like kind of pull from that is like those are two different seasons.
Like in one moment, he's a lamp to our feet.
Like we can look down and we can see the next three, four steps in front of us.
And he's like, no, you've got to just focus on what I've got for you right here.
So put your head down, keep walking.
I got the next step, right?
And that requires an element and a level of faith that we have to like lay at his feet.
Because like, no, you have to take this because all you're showing me is the next like couple
of feet in front of me.
And he says, it's your job just to walk it out.
Like the destinations, my responsibility.
Like you let me handle the end goal and like you just need to be, be obedient in the now.
And then the second season of that is sometimes he's the light to our paths where like we
can see like 500 feet, which is all metaphors, right?
We can see 500 feet down the lane.
We know where we're going, but we don't have the reality of how to get there right in front
of us yet.
And that season requires a whole nother level of faith.
Like then we have to put our trust in like that he has the end in sight and it may be
ours to navigate a little bit of the road that's in front of us, right?
And so that's like one of these things that in my story of my life and I didn't go into
crazy detail because we'd be here for four hours.
If I talked about every single moment that like that was my experience is like, that
will come.
That will come.
But like the reality is, is there moments where I experienced the lamp to my feet and
then there were other moments when I experienced the light to my path.
And it's a different aspect.
It's a different level of trust that you have to have for each and every single one of these.
But the thing that always remains true is that like obedience is always better than
sacrifice.
And so you may be walking in a season of like lamp right now and you're like, I don't know
what the end looks like.
Just be obedient to the step in front of you.
Just be obedient to that next place he tells you to put your footing because if it's lit
up by the lamp, it's going to be solid.
It's going to be a firm footing.
And then on the other side, if you're like, I see what's happening.
I know what's going on in front of me, but I don't know where the next step is.
Like same thing.
It's a different level of like be obedient.
Don't try to rush ahead too quickly because if you try to rush ahead too quickly, you're
going to end up sacrificing too much.
And this brings me back to the moment where I met you.
But like it was because in those relationships that I had, like God put it in me that I've
always wanted to be a dad.
I've always wanted to be a husband.
Like I wanted that.
Like I felt that and that was that scenario is a light to my path scenario.
Right?
Like it's not now I'm, I'm 18, 19, 20 years old, right?
And I'm looking around go, no, I had this thing, but like it's not there in front of
me.
And what I did was is instead of being obedient, I rushed into it and so many things that were
broken because of that, like me, the people who I was in a relationship with, because
it was, I was rushing something before it was time.
I was trying to take the lamp to my feet moment instead of looking down the light to my path
and trusting him with what he had.
And it wasn't until I got to that moment where I said, you know what God, like it's not about
me anymore.
Like I won't do this until you like give me the prompting.
And so actually, do I, should I tell this part of the, the checklist?
The checklist that I made.
So I totally, this was an ego problem for me this time.
I said, God, I'm not doing this anymore.
I'm done.
And here's how I'm going to know when you tell me that I'm good to go, that I can dive
back into a relationship.
I said, first things first, I need her to support me in my ministry.
That's the number one checklist.
The second thing is, is I want her to also be engaged in ministry.
I want that to be something that's a passion for both of us.
And the third thing I said, okay, I also need her to help us pack up.
Cause at the time we had our own sound systems and microphones and pianos and all this stuff.
So we were, you know, traveling.
Worship gigs and conferences pretty often.
So for you to like go to a place, set up, tear down, like that was just the weekend
usual.
That was like the weekend, like the Thursday through Saturday usual, wake up at six, go
to work, get off at four and then go straight somewhere and unload and be ready to lead
worship that evening.
And so I looked at God and I said, I need her.
My third must is I need her to help us pack stuff up.
And then I went, you know what?
And then he got really cocky.
I don't just need her to help us pack stuff up.
I need her to wrap up a microphone cable.
I specifically said she, I need to see her wrap up a microphone cable.
And so one day that night that I was telling about worship at the bar, she walks in the
door and that moment hadn't happened yet, but God was starting something in the middle
of all of this.
So I think that's where I'll leave it to have you tell your story and we'll get back
to that.
We'll get back to the microphone cable.
Full circle at the end of this podcast.
I'm not going to break that.
I wanted enough like he flubbed it and he was like, nope, doesn't matter.
Or if you were so flawless, he was a nabber.
I love it.
Well, fitting with my character is so flawless.
It's true.
It's so, so good.
Yeah.
No, I love to even just like a pause in your story for a second.
I love coming back to even waypoint when you got in the middle there, even how you were
talking and came out of high school or no, excuse me, before that you had that moment
in high school where the speaker in your chapel had asked, you know, is this your parents'
faith or is this your faith?
When are you going to take what your parents believe and make it your own?
And you wrestled with that.
And so you first had to get to the point of like, do I even believe what is my faith?
All through all of that, then you come to the point where God blesses you with the friends,
the people who are pouring into you, mentors.
He surrounds you with a strong circle for you to be able to go from the point of, what
is my faith?
Do I even have faith?
To then the second step of, I do have faith standing strong in it and now going, what
am I going to do with it?
And I think that's just so powerful to see that progression of what is my faith solidified.
Now what am I going to do with it and just when you leave room for God to just do what
he wants to do?
He's really good at being him.
Yeah, he is.
Right?
I can't imagine it.
It's really a job we should just let him have at all times, right?
Absolutely.
You think we'd remember that more often, yeah?
Well, you know, when Jesus said, you have little faith and we've discussed, you know,
before that that is the duration of little, that that's just how we think as people.
That's how the flesh rules us.
And so yeah, you think we'd remember, but we forget.
Really quick.
Every day.
Yep, absolutely.
Well, hey, I'll go ahead and dive in.
So thank you for introducing Luke and me.
So I'm Bree on this podcast, of course, and I'll start.
I was talking with someone just a couple of weeks ago and they made the comment to me.
I was sharing my story and my journey and they made the statement, wow, like you really
are just a byproduct of the local church.
Like you are the picture of a byproduct of the local church.
And that just stuck with me and I was thinking about it and I was like, you know what?
Like I really, really am.
And that is so much of my story is this local church, even of where we are recording this
podcast.
The people and the place of this church is really what has built me.
I even think so the office that I am in right now, so I am the pastor of discipleship here
at South Hills and so the office that I get to be in is so special to me and brings tears
to my eyes because when I was a child, my mom has been on staff here at South Hills for
26 years.
I'm 27.
So almost all of my life.
So grew up in this building in the office that I'm in now in my childhood, I would come
here after school and I would go to that office.
It used to be the office of our assistant bookkeeper and I would shred paper for hours.
They needed help shredding paper.
And so I would just sit in there for hours and I would shred paper and I would talk with
our assistant bookkeeper.
Her name was Sharon and they would just pour into me the receptionist after school.
I would come and just sit in the receptionist's office and Carol and all of these women would
just pour into me and let me play in their offices and hang out after school.
And I look back at all of those years and think like I am just when he said that you're
the byproduct of the local church.
I'm like, I am just so thankful for the people who have just poured into my life.
It might not have always looked like a blessing in the moment, but to look back and now especially
sitting in that office thinking back of like, wow, when I was seven, eight, nine, I would
just sit in here shredding paper for hours while people just poured into me.
And if you would have told me 20 something years later, you're going to be a pastor on
staff at this church and this will be your office.
I would have never, ever believed them.
I probably would have told them we'll get into my story, but I would have said like,
oh, thank you, I actually want nothing to do with that.
So yeah, so I am pastor's kid grew up here at this church.
My mom has been a pastor pretty much all of my life and I grew up just your normal pastor's
kid, nothing crazy, but I think you see the good, the bad and the ugly.
I think that's a pretty stereotypical response, but it was true.
You do.
You get to see a lot of really high mountain tops, but a lot of really low valleys.
And so for me personally, I think I just said like, you know, I'm kind of good.
Like I've seen enough to last me a lifetime and I don't want anything to do with this.
Like nothing against Jesus.
He's cool, but I'm good personally.
Like to devote my life to that, I'm all right.
And I think from a very young time, I did always feel a call on my life to ministry.
That was something that was pointed out to me multiple times, but I never took it with
any serious weight or depth.
I just kind of brushed it off and I was like, hmm, that's, you know, that's nice.
No, thank you.
I'm not interested.
So yeah, right.
I'll just pass.
So I, you know, put my plans together of course, because I am a planner.
I am a type A and I have a plan C, D and E to my A and B. And so I have got it under control.
So I was very excited.
It looks like I do just want to cut it.
She is the queen you said earlier that, oh, you got, you're so organized.
You got this.
Anything that is organization on my end is strictly because of her involvement in my
life.
She is awesome.
I don't know how you guys do it.
Like, you guys are robbing yourself of the joy of shooting from the hip.
Oh, that, that joy is more like the panic attack.
Her it's the sheer terror.
For me, I embrace it, but yeah, that's, that's like the only way to go shooting from the
hip makes me 20.
You get better at it.
The nerve is calm.
Yeah.
So I had made my plans.
I applied to a bunch of colleges and I wound up going to Grove City for psychology and I
thought like, wow, that's a really, you know, it's what a great aspiration for me.
Like good for me.
Pat myself on the back.
I'm going to really just roll with this.
And I did, you know, I had went, but in that I had felt so unfulfilled and I just, the
more I went to classes, the more that I was at Grove City, I actually became incredibly
like anxious, depressed and I just felt very unfulfilled like I had said.
And so I came home pretty frequently and I would help in the youth group and be a part
of different things.
And one of my youth leaders at the time just stopped me the one time and just looked me
dead in the eyes and said, Brianna, what are you doing?
Like, you know the call in your life.
What are you doing?
Why are you just running from it and trying to fulfill something that is not meant for
you?
That's not your purpose.
And so I went back home to college and I actually, when I checked my mail that night, because
that was the big thing, you know, at college was like, oh, what do I have in my mailbox
today?
It was like your old me fulfilled not to get you through the day is like, hopefully someone
sent me a good package.
But I had someone anonymously, I have no idea who it was, but they had drawn this beautiful
picture and it had the scripture verse, be still and know that I am God.
And I just knew, I just knew like, okay, okay.
So I had thought that I was surrendering and that I was coming to terms with like, okay,
I know that you're calling me, I understand what that means.
So I'm going to go ahead, like thank you so much for cluing me in.
I got it from here though.
So again, like my planner comes back out of like, thank you so much for that tidbit, but
now I will take this upon myself.
So I started researching ministry schools and different things to be a part of.
I started touring a couple and I got accepted to a couple, which is great.
I laugh now because I'm just like, did I even seek the Lord?
Like I, you know, he gives you an inch and I'm like, oh, thank you so much genius.
I will now take that upon myself.
And I did and I got accepted and I had made this plan.
I was on my way to James River's leadership college, a great church out in Missouri.
And so that was my plan.
I had come home.
I was interning here actually at South Hills for the summer in the children's and youth
department and we had gotten the opportunity to go lead worship for the Pendel kids camp.
It was a great time.
I loved it.
But during that week, the Lord wrecked me.
And so this was the middle of July.
I had already had an apartment.
I had three roommates waiting for me in Missouri that I was supposed to be moving in the middle
of August.
This was the end of July.
The Lord completely wrecks me.
And it's like, what are you doing?
You're not seeking me.
So I came home from that kids camp.
I had actually wound up going to a Hillsong concert with my friends that night.
And again, I am just weeping.
I am sobbing the whole time.
I wake up the next morning.
It was a Saturday and I had sat down with my parents and I remember they had the same
uneasy feeling that I did.
We came to the conclusion like, OK, this is not right.
I'm not supposed to be going to James River.
For me, the planner, I'm supposed to be moving in three weeks.
What am I going to do with my like, I was like, I'm going to have to work at McDonald's
for the rest of my life.
I can't get into another school in three weeks.
What am I going to do now?
So I am like, Lord, you have got to give me more than that.
Which of course, he's just humbling me of like, you didn't even seek me.
Like I was so gracious like to bring you to this point.
I clenched it in.
And then you right.
And then I just cut him out.
So at that time, that was a Saturday.
And my mutual or my friend had been asking me all summer, come to this church called
the barn, come to this church called the barn.
I play in a worship team over there.
He was a drummer here at South Hills at the time and I had been blowing him off all summer.
I was like, I don't have time for that.
I'm not going to go, but I had promised him this was the Saturday, the Saturday that my
whole world was falling apart.
The Saturday I thought I'd be at McDonald's the rest of my life.
This was the Saturday night that I told him.
Not that there's anything wrong with working in McDonald's.
Right.
Not that there's anything wrong.
He's typically entry level, not career.
He's a 50 year player.
He's a great place.
Yeah.
We love McDonald's.
The fries are good.
Yes.
Love the fries.
So that night I had told him, I'm free.
I'll come check out this place called the barn.
So I was the whole day just spent crying.
My eyes were a mess.
Everything was a hot disaster and I told my mom and parents, we're trying to console me
and we'll figure this out.
We're going to get you on the right path.
We're going to get you where God wants you to be.
So I said, you know what?
If my life plans just got wrecked, I have to be at this worship night that my friend
invited me to.
My mom was like, you can't go to that.
It's like over an hour away.
You've been crying all day.
You can't see out of your eyes.
I was like, no, please, please, I have to be in the word of God with the worship of the
Lord and community.
If he has just wrecked my plans, of course, you know, I like I wrecked my own plans.
He didn't wreck them.
And so I grabbed my friend and we drove out to this tiny church for me.
I'm like a suburbs girl group in the South Hills my whole life drove out to this tiny
barn church, literally a barn, right?
They converted it.
It was a barn that the top where all the hay was that you redid that that was the sanctuary.
You could feel like 120 people in there.
The bottom where all the stables were at.
They re converted that some bathrooms like a youth room and that's where everyone like
ate and like came together before.
So literally a barn in the middle of nowhere.
Yeah, we drove out there over an hour away and my good friend came with me.
We got to this little tiny church and I walked upstairs and for me, it's just backstory.
I am not there are you the opposite of me.
Yes, I was like, hey, so very much so.
I was like, hey, like I want this and I want it now.
You on the other hand, you wouldn't see that in like any female.
You'd be like, okay, this is potential.
This could be like, oh, it was bad.
I'd be like, maybe maybe this way.
I maybe else.
Maybe it was bad.
I'd go 500 miles down the road.
I was the complete opposite.
Like I am not interested in guy.
I just it was not even on my radar and at to say the least, like I could not be less
interested.
So it's just not like me to like see someone to be like, oh, that's going to be my husband.
That is just a whole special.
Especially after your plans were wrecked.
Well, you're done in an emotional stage to be thinking this is where I'm going to meet
Mr. What?
I was a disaster.
And also like that cliche that everyone's like, no, the first second that I laid eyes
on that person.
I know I believe probably for me is was that was everybody.
That was like that cliche hit me every time I looked at someone.
And the problem was for me, I thought like those people are delusional.
Like whoever says that, there's something wrong with them.
So like no, Lord, what did you do?
Just has to humble you.
So again, I'm at this little tiny church with my friend.
I walk up these steps and the minute the minute I turn the corner, he's the first thing I
see and I, I don't know how else to even explain it.
Like I knew in the depths of my soul that was my husband.
And I just had this piece come over me of like, okay, like, I guess that's why I didn't
go.
I guess everything's going to be okay.
And I'm like, I'll wind up marrying him.
And that's, I mean, this is what it's going to be.
Like and I just, I instantly had this and anyone who knows me the next day at church,
I saw my other best friend and I was sharing with her and said, like, I just saw, I like
I met my husband and like people that know me, I mean, her jaw hit the floor.
Like what are you talking about?
I'm like, I guess it's all going to be okay.
And from there, it was okay.
Like the Lord truly, of course we were in our own separate place.
Totally.
The Lord was still working in our hearts so deeply and just, I think we're finding our
call and we're finding our personhood.
But I then that fall, that September.
So again, this was all in end of July, August by September, the church used to have a counseling
center associated with it, right?
I went to school for psychology, thought I was going to have this huge aspiration, but
he's so gracious with us.
So he knew like you're not ready.
Your heart is not ready to jump into full time pastoral ministry or anything of that
sort, the church had a counseling center and by September, I was working at our faith-based
counseling center and I was there for two years.
And what's so funny is I even thought during that time, like maybe I'll go back to school,
maybe I'll do this, even though you know, like I know the Lord is calling me to something
and I'm still like, but maybe, but maybe.
So it was just that two year period where again, he's still just refining and refining.
And so I was their intake coordinator there.
I had a wonderful time and after two years, so 2018, the Lord opened a door and I have
been on staff at South Hills ever since.
So I'm coming up on six years now, but it's just so cool to see the Lord and how gracious
he is in that journey.
Yeah.
Which brings us back to that, that moment, right?
That Saturday night.
So what was so funny was as you came up and she had that moment with Jesus where she was
like, no, this is it.
I was not there yet.
Like I was still in my like, my like, nope, I'm not even talking like we're not doing
this.
We're not touching that with the temple.
We're not having that, right?
And so I'm in process, right?
God's working on me.
And that's when it was literally actually three weeks before, like two to three weeks
before you walked in that I said my list of demands.
This is my hostage list.
God, this is, I'm not going to say yes until you give me this, right?
And so she walks in has this experience.
I'm still in process.
God is weeding out like some deeply rooted flaws that I had.
He's getting rid of all of the, I don't even know what to put it, like the things that I
was chasing after before he's like kind of pulling those seeds out of me as best as he
could.
Cause if it's a bad seed, we need to remove it, right?
We need to get it out of the soil so it doesn't grow.
And so like I said that I gave him my list of demands.
What was it?
Six months later, eight months later.
About a year actually.
About a year.
A little over a year.
So about a year poor you.
I feel bad looking back at this story now, but like we would like text, but like nothing
like it was nothing like.
It was just very mutual friends for about a year.
Yeah.
And we were at this conference that we got invited to lead worship for and our full gospel
church.
It was a full gospel church in Uniontown.
Honestly, the people in the crowd should have been leading worship.
They were better than us just singing from the congregation, but we were just honored
to be their leading worship with them.
I remember it was a long day because I was still working construction then had been up
since like six AM.
I didn't even get to change out of my work clothes.
Like I'm leading worship in paint shirts.
So it's like looking like a village.
Yeah.
Literally.
It was, it was bad.
But it was a full gospel church.
It went late.
So it wasn't like, Hey, we're an hour and we're done.
It was like, no, we're going to sing break every chain for 45 minutes.
Like this is what we're going to do.
And so we get to the end of this.
It's late.
I'm exhausted and I'm packing up my keyboard and my electric guitar.
And I'm just so flawless that I stick around because I just want to be of help.
Right.
I just want to be a humble servant used by the Lord.
And so I'm over here packing up my bags, right.
And I look over and what do I hear come out of her mouth, but Hey, Jake, who was one of
my best friends at still is now to this day, but he played in the tea with us.
She walks on and says, Hey, Jake, I want to help you guys pack up.
But I know you musicians are very particular with the way you wrap up your cables.
So will you show me how to wrap up this microphone cable verbato from her mouth?
I have a music background.
I know musicians are picky.
You don't touch their equipment.
There is a specific way that every musician has a wrapping up their cables, putting their
guitars away, breaking down their stuff.
So I'm going to follow suit and I'm going to do things the right way.
So she does that.
And the second he goes, sure.
And he shows her how to do it.
And then I'm watching like what I said was, is I need to see her wrap it up.
I didn't say she needs to ask.
So he shows her how to do it.
And she goes, all right, thanks, starts wrapping up the cable and a demo when I sat there and
I looked up and I said, okay, all right, you've humbled me again.
You've met my list of demands.
You didn't have to do it that way, but you've done it and I get it.
And so I think it was still another what six months after that before it was one month,
one month.
That's right.
I'm sorry.
Wow.
Six months.
I'm sorry.
Because that was the answer for it.
I know.
I'm so sorry.
The reason is because for me, that was such a jarring process and it was honestly scary
for me.
Sure.
Because of I had jumped in so soon all the times before that I was like, even with God's
confirmation.
Confirmation, I was still like, I'm nervous to do this because it meant like I told him,
I said, the next one's it.
Like whatever you say yes on, like that's it.
And so there was an element of me where like I knew that this, that I will go down this
road, like we are getting married.
This is what's happening.
I didn't know that she had already had that conversation with God.
And it was, it was great on her end, but I was still wrestling that out.
So that about a month later on Thanksgiving, we were supposed to go where we're supposed
to go to what, elevation concert?
Is that what it was?
Or we were supposed to go?
That was in October.
We had already gone on a friend night.
You were just friends.
To an elevation concert as just friends.
But doesn't his timeline kill you?
Our timeline is so messed up.
It's the worst.
Well, it's a typical man.
Like what I say, like the other day, I mean any time from yesterday to last two years
ago.
Yes.
No, for sure.
100% So, but so we had come off of go to see an elevation concert and on Thanksgiving,
we were supposed to go and just hang out as friends.
But I walk her up the driveway and I said, Hey, like, how would you feel about turning
like our hangout tomorrow into a date?
Like it was just super sweet.
I listen, I am not smooth.
Like that is like, I'm gonna go sarcasm.
You're picking up.
That's all my goodness.
Like I'm, I look back to everyone and I'm like, why did you say yes?
So the Lord already talked to me.
It's all right.
Like I feel embarrassed for you.
So that was my question.
And then we went on a date the next day.
And what's so funny is this like, I think normal people like they're like, let's go
on a date and let's make sure that like our date was as we started off in the mall at
the village.
We sat down and eat eight food.
I think I got China Max.
I literally had like China Max and we sat in front of the front of each other and we're
like, all right.
So what do you go with?
We basically just lifted out.
Yeah.
Like I think it's negotiables for me.
This is what I'll move on.
This is what I want.
But like about faith, about values, not about like trivial things or service level things
like deep, like this is what is valued to me.
This is what's important to me.
I won't negotiate this.
I won't go past this.
Like I won't change my value on this.
How do you feel about this?
And it was literally like a debate bagging forth for 30 minutes and we got to the end
and we were like, okay, so you good?
Yep.
I'm good.
You good?
Okay.
Yep.
I'm good.
Okay.
Great.
You want to go ice skating now?
No.
Because of how intentional, I know that obviously the Lord's hand was in it from the very, very
beginning, but with the Lord's hand and the Lord's blessing on it mixed with our intentionality,
I just think you see really the favor that is our relationship.
It's really important to hash that stuff out.
And I think today's society doesn't understand that, you know, it's all about my happiness
and my moment.
And you know, like Shelly and I, we had talked about many things that we had a lot of the
values and it was a whole point of dating from the Christian standpoint. We call it dating,
but really it's courting, right? The whole point is to see if you're compatible. If this is a
person that you can share the rest of your life with, that you can both honor God and honor each
other in this relationship that has nothing to do with if I want to love you more tomorrow than
yesterday because you might make me mad. Right? Has everything to do with that commitment,
everything to do with, I can't hurt you because you are me. And I just think it's great that you
guys had that and I'm beloved that you guys are open about that too. Because I really think people
need to hear that. I think that's a very important aspect, especially for the younger generation that
doesn't really understand what marriage is for and more people are getting married because they
don't understand it because it's been so removed through media, social media, TV, you name it,
right? It's not even a romanticized anymore. Right. I think even the biblical aspect of it,
like it is the intentionality piece, but at the end of the day, marriage is a covenant. It's not a
slip of paper. It's not just something for society. Marriage is a biblical command and
something found in the Bible. It's not something that's societal. And so to know again, at the end
of the day, you are entering into a covenant and to take it as such. Yeah. I think sometimes it does
get like, oh, we don't take it too seriously. And it's like, I get that to an extent. You want to
make sure you can have fun with the person. But at the end of the day, there is an element to it
where it's like, no, if we are going to do this, like you said, it's a God-spoken covenant between
two people. Like we see it as this, like, I think actually when we did our wedding, I put it in there,
I was like, it's more than just a piece of paper for tax purposes. Like it's not so that we can
file together or so that we can say like under the state, it's like, no, God has tied this knot
together. And if we're going to honor that covenant, then like, we're going to put cards on the table,
man. Like, what are you okay with? What are you not okay with? How do you believe? What's your faith?
And where are we going from here? I think that was super important. And I think because of the
process that we had both gone through, mostly because of the person that like you were that
God has raised you up to be. But for me, because of I self-inflicted like trauma that I had gone
through from before, like I just got into that point where I'm like, God, I like, we can't do this
again. And so if we are going to do this again, I'm going to make sure I know where you're at,
and we're going to do this going forward. And so that really kind of started in the journey for
us like together, because we got married November 30th, 2019. And then almost four years. So actually
next week, it'll be, well, I don't know when this is going to release, but, but whatever this releases,
two weeks, we will be four years married at that point. Right. Congratulations. Thank you. Thank
you very much. I will post that. That's great. But within three months of us getting married. So
I worked construction. She worked at the church. She had a vehicle. I had a vehicle. I had never
lived, but with my parents, you had gone away to school for a little bit, but we're living with
your parents at the time. So from November of 2019 till February, like our whole lives shifted
when we got married. Like we move in together to the our apartment for the first time. I get hired
on at the church here full time. And my truck that I was driving, my precious truck, I miss it so much.
I went down in a matter of those three months. So in that small amount of time, we were now living
together, driving everywhere in one vehicle together and working at the same place with each other.
And then give it one month more, give it five, six weeks more. COVID shows up. So then the whole
world's changing around us and we're together 24 seven. And so we always do joke like, now we made
it through the first year of driving together in one car, working at the same place, moving in and
COVID like we did the first year, we're going to be great. Like this is rapidly accelerated. We rapidly
accelerated through that process. I would lose my money. I need to be alone to recharge, to fill my cup.
I would be out of it. That was our start is as I got hired on here as worship and youth director.
And then within six weeks, COVID hits and like the pastor who hired me actually joked, he goes,
Luke, you get the award for worst ministry start because within six weeks, we were just
trying to figure out everything again. It was like everyone was trying to reallibrate.
Everyone was trying to recalibrate into what does the new world look like.
And so that started down this road for us of now like, so we're married now, but also we now have
like a ministry call together. So separately, we have our own individual callings that we do.
But now there's this other factor that is we're doing life and ministry together. We're pouring
into people together. And if you look at where we're at now, if you would have asked me five,
six years ago, like, Luke, you're going to be like, are you going to become a pastor? I would have
looked at you and said no. Because where I was coming from was as like, no, I've been doing this.
I've been leading worship. I'm already walking in the gifts that are there for it. Like, why do I
need to go to school to study for like that was my that was my hang up. I think he felt like I can
shepherd and love on people without a title. Why do I have to have a title for something? Can't I
just love people and pour into people without having that? And I look back and of course, for
myself as well, being hired on at the church, I did not necessarily think I was going to be a pastor
either. And so now that we have all of the pieces, I just look back and think the Lord that I see
what he was doing with the both of us. And he was growing our hearts and our passions, but we were
able to then walk that credentialing road together, which is just such a unique story because not
many people have it even while we were in school. So our license, our pastoral license is under
the assemblies of God. And even while we were in school, our instructors and our pastors just go
saying like, this is so odd, we don't typically have couples together. Because you typically see
them, you know, the man go first and then a couple years later or 20 years later, the wife will
finally be like, you know what, I think that's time where they'll each go separately to school.
And so they kept going like, I don't know what they're going to do for your interviews. I don't
know what they're going to do with the both of you. But I am just so thankful. And I see the hand
of the Lord and just so special to our story that we got to walk that journey together. See, I think
even our ceremony, our own nation ceremony in Philadelphia this past year, like experiencing
that together, studying together, diving into God's word together has just been so powerful. I
think it's so special to our story. And even the things just prophesied over us that it will be
a together anointing. There's just something different. We do have an individual call, but
the call that we have together. Yeah, it's special. And I think I think even a testament to like,
it took us realizing the together scenario for me to get off of my pill of like, I don't need to go
through any kind of schooling. I don't need to have a piece like I don't need to prove myself to
anybody. But it switched because at the end of the day, like the Bible tells us to study to prove
ourselves like like study to prove ourselves worthy. Like it literally explains for us to do that.
And in the middle with both of us, like, I got off of this thing where I don't need that,
because I saw the fruitfulness of what it looks like for us to be able to study together,
for us to be able to learn together, for us to be able to have that knowledge of going into the
season of our lives of like, God totally flipped me around at that point too. And was like, no,
I want you to do this because you and Bre are going to learn so much in this process together.
And honestly, I am like blessed. I've told you, I've told you about this, but I'll praise you
again. Like the fact that I got to do that together with you is something that I will like forever
treasure. Like sitting in Panera bread for like two hours or more than that, we were there for
what like six hours a day for like a week, Panera took all our money. And they're just over money.
How long were we actually there? Because we know he's really bad with time. Oh my goodness. I thought
it's a limit. Like it was like, at least six hours a day, at least six hours a day, like multiple
days a week. Just preparing for our exam. Just preparing for our exam. But like, I'm so grateful
that I got to sit and have you as the partner to be able like to do that together with like it
wouldn't have been as special as it was if it wasn't with you. And also like because of the nature
of who you are, like in our opposites, like she actually drives me to be the better like version
of myself. Because like, which is what's really funny, we talk about the like the shooting from
the hip scenario, like that's me to a tee. Like I'm always like willing to I stand up and yeah,
we're good. I don't need a plan. Let's just roll with it. But I've found the beauty in the middle
of the strategy because of us doing this together because of us talking about this. And this is
where we really see like the concept that you talked about of like, no, we both have an anointing
and a calling that are separate. But there is something even that like, I know I feel it fully
special when we are able to walk this out together because of who Jesus has made us. And because of
what and how he's allowing us to minister to people. I know I've taught class the last couple
of weeks by myself. But like, there really is it like without you being there, like there's an
element of you being there that like it completes me. And if that makes sense, like I am good in
so many areas, but you are just like so firm and calm and like articulate. And you just like, I
don't know, we're like peanut butter and jelly. That's enough. Yeah, I'm sorry. That is very kind.
You guys are both really, really wonderful. I appreciate you guys coming on the podcast
and sharing your story. You know, we see you often, but we don't really know you. Yeah, right.
And I mean, we know what you project, but that's not necessarily who you are or what's really
what you are. You know, I love that you were clued into God, right? But you were so sure of yourself
that you missed the last part of the message that he says, I'm cluing into my plan, right?
Not your plan, my plan. And then he kept pounding you for it, but in his special gentle way.
I love how you guys came together. I love the microphone story. It's tremendous. Like, and
you know, I really would encourage people to see more of you, you know, and so if they would
South Hills, Assemble You God, right? They're here Sundays. Most of them, sometimes they take
like sabbaticals and go to Cleveland and what, but they do stuff. They're not just here. They do
stuff. And you know, it's like, it's like those old monster truck commercials like, you know,
Sunday, Sunday, Sunday, you put people all see what you're only me. I love that you knew that
I've been a couple months to James and my life. Right. I was there on dig foot with
introduced and Vegas. They're amazing. Love that. Love that. Well, thank you so much for
coming prepared and with such an amazing story and testimony. And I love getting to know you
guys better than just, you know, our class and stuff and Sundays. And what a cool story. Oh my
goodness. Do you have anything else you want to share? I don't think so. I think we gave you a
good, we gave you a good first glimpse there. First glimpse painting of us. Yeah. Yeah, we're
just walking our life continuing and God's goodness. Right. Yeah. Awesome. Well, shameless plug.
God's goodness. Watch the podcast. It's not shameless if we're doing it. It's not ashamed
of what we're doing. Very good. Thanks for clarifying up for me. No, but thank you from the
bottom of our hearts for bringing us on. Yeah. And then everybody can get to know you better too
when they listen in. Yeah. And, you know, speaking to the listener, if this has been a blessing to
you or someone came to your mind that you thought maybe you could be blessed by this, we ask that
you share it with them or any of the episodes. And also we have a fundraising campaign in gipsango.com
and just look up God's goodness podcast and the funds to help pay for the audio editing because
I outsource that because that's not our joy. It's not my joy. So with that, we'll talk to you next time.