Hi, and welcome to the In the Cortex podcast.
We are your hosts.
I'm Paloma Garcia.
And I am Dani Perrecone.
And we're the founders of In the Cortex, an online community with programs that show people
the tools that they need to change their lives through brain reorganization.
No medication, just movement.
When you get your brain out of survival mode and regulate your nervous system, you start
to live in the fun, logical part of the brain, the cortex.
Subscribe today and learn how to live your best in the cortex life.
And now on to today's episode.
Hi, and thank you so much for listening to the podcast.
Today we have an extra special episode for you.
This is a collaboration that we did with Christiana Dyckman from APA, the Association for Pre- and
Perinatal Psychology and Health, and Carlton Terry, who is a world-renowned baby therapist
and author.
It's such an amazing conversation.
And it's coming up right before their birth psychology month, which is going to take place
in March.
So if you want some more information, please go to birthpsychology.com and please listen
to this amazing episode.
We know that you're going to get some really great insight from it.
Thanks.
Oh my gosh.
Welcome.
This is great.
I have some really some of my favorite people today and I'm going to introduce you all.
And then we're going to get started with our topic, which we were just flowing on before
we hit record on this, which is about how having a happy kid or happy kids is a happy
family.
And I know there's always the saying that it's mommy's happy, everyone's happy.
So now you realize there's this symbiotic relationship that's happening.
And here I am today with Carlton Terry, who has been working in and around the pre-imperianatal
sciences for 30 years plus Carlton.
Yeah, forever.
It's true.
And you specialize in, I want to say like decoding babies.
Like you've worked with some of the top psychologists.
You've trained with a number of people who have been in the pre-imperianatal psychology
world and you really know how to read the cues of babies.
And you've learned how their journey that has brought them here to life has all sorts
of pit stops or stations along the way.
Like they live a whole universe before they're even born.
Yeah, they do.
And it's so important because now we're here with Danny Paracone and Paloma Garcia.
And these two lovely gals are the leaders in this amazing movement with neuro sequential
development, which is a big word.
And they call it in the cortex, their company.
And you help parents and families basically reorganize their brain from things that have
gone on during this universe of time that's lapsed with children when they are conceived.
And we as a world really are blind or maybe we just haven't, the layers haven't been taken
off for us to see all the things that go on in the room space and in the family space.
But yet we now know with neuroscience, epigenetics and all sorts of psychology and somatic based
therapies that this is the most important time of your life is the first thousand days.
And we don't even see or really personally know our children at that time, but yet it's
the foundation.
So I want to give each of you time to maybe tell a little bit about yourself and how all
of us got here together.
I know I'm the director of education at APA, which is an organization that promotes the
awareness of how this time in the womb is like the most important thing for not only
a child, but for our world and our relationships and our social structures.
And that's what we're going to unpack a little bit today is how all of us help bring this
awareness to the world and how we've come up with amazing techniques to really help
families thrive.
So I don't know who wants to take it away from here and talk a little bit.
I mean, I can go first.
There's always that awkward who's going to go.
I knew that was going to happen.
OK, so I can go first, I'm Paloma Garcia, one of the founders of In the Cortex.
And the way that I came to learn about brain reorganization was actually through my brother,
because he had a lot of learning challenges and social challenges and just a lot of challenges
when he was little.
And he did a similar program, actually the program where Danny and I met in San Diego.
He did that when he was about 17 years old and it completely changed his life.
He went from being a person who was constantly facing challenge after challenge after challenge
just all day long to being himself and being able to go to college, finish college.
He lives in Australia alone now.
He has a boyfriend, he has his own company.
I mean, he's just the most anybody who meets him nowadays would never think that he ever
struggled the way he did when he was younger.
And so that really inspired me to start to look at this stuff and really understand what
was going on with the brain, because when I learned about the importance of creeping
and crawling and all these different movements in that first year of life, and I saw that
changed my brother, and then I saw it in myself, I said, okay, there's something here.
This is this is going to change the world.
And so I had a business that I had in Mexico City.
I closed it and I moved to San Diego to be Danny's intern in 2014, I think 13 maybe long
time ago, right?
Maybe, I don't know, but we'd already known each other for a while.
And I'd already been studying it for a bit.
And long story short, I worked with Danny for a long time, then we both went our separate
ways for a while.
I lived in New York, I lived in Barcelona, and then we came back to do in the cortex
together.
And so now here we have it, we have a program that guides people through those movements
that they might have missed in that first year of life.
Because the truth is that the brain is so powerful that it can reconnect the way that
it's connected at any age through any experience that we have.
That's neuroplasticity, that's the power that it has.
And so what we want to do is just help people understand that they have the power, we each
have the power to change our brains, and to make our brain more efficient and just our
lives happier and not have to try as hard as we maybe have had to be trying our whole
lives, right?
It's it's really a lot easier.
And like you said, Christiana, one of our biggest passions is sharing this information
and sharing also that while you may not have gotten that stuff in the womb, or in that
first year, two years, three years of life, even if you're what's how old is our nine
our oldest member?
91, 90?
Even if you're 90 years old, you can still get on the floor and crawl and finish that
development and truly give your brain the neurological foundation that it's been craving
your whole life.
And that's what we're all about.
I also have a master's in neurodevelopmental disorders and another one neurological rehabilitation.
So that's kind of added on to what we have been doing for for all this time.
Oh, my gosh, this is I'm so excited to hear from you too, Danny, because I, I discovered
this outside of the two of you.
But now some of my clients I've referred to you because it's just such a foundational
program that you can do that supports the type of somatic based therapies that I offer
in my practice, which is craniosacral therapy and different, different aspects of this pre
and perinatal education, which Carlton is going to unpack because we're like, wait a
second, healing happens in the now.
And ultimately, our goals are all like, we really would love for people to have this
knowledge before they even, you know, sink of becoming a family.
But in the world that we live in, we have so much to uncover just from ourselves and
where we've come from.
So I love this program, how it's any age at any time and how does it connect to your birth?
I know Carlton's going to unpack that a little bit here in a minute of how and why you get
to this point because of the birth.
And you're talking about crawling and creeping, which I know some of the people on this call
may be like, wait, what, how does crawling have to do with how I think or act right now?
So maybe Dani, you can tell us a little bit about who you are, how you came to it and
why does crawling tie into this?
Definitely.
I'm so excited to be here.
Thank you for having us.
And so I'm Dani, I'm the other half of In the Cortex.
I have been doing this work for now 14 years.
I got into it similarly because my brother also was very, very challenged.
He was labeled with so many different things.
My parents went through every avenue they possibly could 40 or 30 years ago, trying
to figure out how to help him not be so angry.
He was a very angry child and they just couldn't, they, you know, went through everything.
My mom stumbled across Paul Denison, who is the founder of Brain Jam.
And to be clear, Pullman and I are not the founders of these movements and practical
modalities.
We have just been trained in them and we've put it together into a program to make it
accessible and affordable for anyone.
That's, that was always our big thing was making it so it's accessible and something
that everyone can do around the world.
So my mom learned about Brain Jam and then she turned me on to brain reorganization.
And when she told me about it, I was like, mom, you're absolutely nuts.
Like there's no way you can get on the floor and crawl like a baby and then your life gets
easier.
I did not buy in for a while until I actually lived in Ecuador and I was living after I
graduated college.
I was a division one athlete and I was just a hot mess, literally running across the campus,
always late, never could keep anything organized, just always felt like I was just reacting
to life.
And I was the Danimal in college.
Like it was really thought I was out there to end people's lives versus just play a sport,
right?
Like you get a sit-down한 you're just sitting on a stool, right?
You know, you can't sit down on a stool and then you fall on the sanitation, so it was
a diabolical situation.
Right, everybody's like, he'sasaki are you all doing okay?
Everybody's digital, you guys are not through and you're like, how does digital really come
about?
I was like, what, it just, the digital system has gone
like this is me, I am a disorganized brain.
And so then I put myself on the floor.
And so here's the piece that you were just asking about.
You put yourself into these positions
and this is what's so cool and so hopeful
for everyone out there is that at any age,
at any point in your life,
neuroplasticity can come into effect.
And so you don't have to,
we always talk about those first three years
and they are super critical and important,
but at any point in your life, you can go back
and you can rewrite your story.
And this is why we love our work
because there's hope for anyone.
And so you put yourself in these positions
and we guide you through this in our program
and then we ask you to move.
And the way you move literally tells us
where your brain left off in development.
And so many people are like, no way, okay, wait, I'm curious.
And they'll do a 30 second movement and we can say, okay,
this is what your life looks like.
And we can rattle off all these different signs
and like, how did you know that about me?
Because the way you move shows us what you have access to,
what automatic functions are in place
and what isn't in place
and how your brain is processing the world.
So we can say, by the way you move,
if you're only moving with what we'd say 10% development,
you're somebody who, if you're driving in your car
and someone cuts you off, you're gonna fly off the handle
because you find it as a personal attack.
You're like, that was a life threatening thing
that just happened to me, so now I'm going to react.
So we say, well, if you do this movement enough,
your brain all of a sudden wakes up and goes,
oh, I know what to do.
I just wasn't given the environment to do it.
And then once the brain goes through the process
of moving in a certain way,
all of a sudden the automatic functions
that weren't there come online.
And now you free up your brain
to be able to handle life for what it is.
And so it's just this really cool thing
that we all have coded within us.
And what we do it in the cortex is we just show you
how to find that.
And it changed my life.
And so once I found this work, I was like,
oh my gosh, I'm not a hot mess.
I don't need to have anxiety.
I don't need to yell and scream at everybody.
Like that's not the real me.
And so once I did these movements,
I found this is how you regulate your nervous system.
And now as a mom, I have two small children,
a four and a seven year old.
I could not imagine motherhood without having this
because I, you know, we all have those moments
in motherhood where we're like, just listen,
I asked you to do that one thing.
It's hard, right?
It takes you to a level you've never experienced in life
where you have people who depend on you, right?
And so for me, it's a must.
I have to regulate my nervous system every day
to be a better mom.
And so that's where our work combined
with what Carleton does is just fascinating
because it just unlocks all these possibilities
of how else you can be the best version of yourself.
And that's what I think we're all striving to do
is how do we feel better every day
without having to work too much harder?
It makes a lot of sense.
And that's why I can feel so much energy in this call.
And that's why I'm gonna call in Carleton
who has this like, nervous, fiddling effect
with all your wisdom.
I have two children myself,
a 13 year old and a six year old.
And my 13 year old and I went through brain gym practices
when she was eight,
because she and I, Danny, were a lot like you're describing.
And that's when I started asking questions.
I used to get so upset
that I was never told this information,
but one of the most empowering things
I can tell every parent listening to this call
or any individual is that you should always research.
You should always ask questions.
Don't just be handed the information
that is given to us in this world
and you will discover so much more.
And one of the joys about my life and my youngest now
is when Carleton Terry entered my life years ago.
He doesn't even know this,
but years ago when I was first pregnant with my son,
my youngest, his name kept popping up
in all the research that I was doing
along with a couple other people like Dr. Emerson
and Frank Lake, all of these people
who kind of started this revolution around nurture science.
And that is like, you hear that today
is like exploring the science of nurture
and how far we've gone off paths.
And Carleton taught people around the world
how there's a story, an emotional-based story
to every single one of our souls
that come into this planet
and that it's sacred and profound
and so vulnerable.
And I know Carleton, maybe that's why you can tell us
a little bit about what it is that you do
and what got you into listening to babies.
You know, I started realizing
that the more vulnerable a human being is,
if they're met with a challenge
or if they're hurt or injured, it goes in deeper.
It just isn't, there's not a lot of protection.
And so we don't, you know, in my world,
we don't really start with birth.
We start much earlier, but I like to start with birth
for most people because everybody can relate to birth.
You know, everybody has a birth story.
They know where they were born.
They know what their parents have told them.
Often their birth story is not the same
as the birth story of the parent.
And we can find that the birth story
is really encoded in the body.
And you know, for years now,
there've been a lot of very convincing arguments
that the mind exists throughout the body.
It's not just in the brain and that our feelings
and our emotions exist in our body.
And now more and more people are giving credit
and really waking up to the whole idea of implicit memories.
Yes.
And implicit memories are deep, strong memories
held in the body and in different parts of the body.
And we can map them and find them.
We can find out how old they were.
We can find out where they came from.
We can do all this wonderful stuff now.
But what happens is if you've been hurt
or traumatized or deeply challenged,
an implicit memory forms.
And in fact, trauma memories actually form easier
and more densely and more quickly
than you guys know this, than love or beauty.
So if we get hurt or there's an intense issue that happens,
or if there's a lack going on over a long period of time,
what happens is that there's a place in the brain
and in the body that sort of has to take over and say,
okay, this is how things work.
I got through this difficult traumatic experience
by putting my head down and pushing with all my might.
And then the brain goes, aha,
this is how to get through life.
We put our head down and we push with all our might
and then we get through.
This is one of the common ones,
but there are hundreds and hundreds of programs like this
that we can uncover and look at and understand.
And the way the psyche works,
the psyche wants us to wake up and work on these things.
So it's always giving us an opportunity.
It sort of knocks on the door with an implicit memory
and says, hey, you lost your keys again.
And where does that come from?
Why am I always losing my keys?
And then how do I feel when I lose my keys?
Am I scared?
Am I sad?
And these programs really can take over our brain
like you guys know and have us react
rather than respond to the actual environment we're in.
And that's what I love about,
you guys' work is because I can see you
working with someone with where they're at in their head.
And that's where we mostly are.
As a system will tell you,
90% of what we live is actually in here.
It's not out there.
It's not our actual environment.
And our actual environment is usually extremely safe
and manageable.
But if we have a program that we need to put our head down
and push because we feel some danger,
we might put our head down and push
and just bump into the car in front of us
because they're not going as fast as we are.
Or you know what, if you're standing in line
at the grocery store
and you feel someone breathing down your neck,
I promise you, you can turn around and you can look
and you can tell they have signs
from when they were programmed
that compelled them to do that.
It's not even a choice.
They just do it.
They do it, their body does it.
And I think for me,
the deepest part of this potential of this work
is if we can give kids and babies
what they are asking for,
and we need to understand it.
It's not always what they're asking for with their words.
It's often what they're asking for with their actions
and with their sounds they're making.
But if we can give them what they need,
and usually we can,
usually it's a pretty simple gift.
They feel happy and safe and fulfilled.
And suddenly the stress goes out of the situation
and we weren't even talking about the symptom.
We were talking about something underneath the symptom
that we just happened to catch
because we had a little bit of training.
So I feel like our job together
is to look at the training we can do,
help people see what's going on at the real level,
underneath the symptoms or underneath the crying
because someone had pitocin or underneath the resistance
because somebody had forceps.
When we can look at the human being underneath
and how they got programmed.
And I call them, I don't know,
I think somebody came up with this phrase, I love it.
It's called hostage-taking neural networks.
Yes, I've heard that.
They're the ones that run most of our lives
and are most of our reactions.
And guess what?
When we find one of those,
it's really easy to talk them down and have them let go.
Change the brain on that level.
So I'm looking forward to a collaboration
because I feel like our work really fits together
in a way that can help actual families
have sweeter, fuller lives.
They're happy.
And you always, if there's one, especially if it's the baby,
if there's an unhappy baby who's not sleeping,
everybody's just miserable.
But if you're a happy baby, if a happy baby,
everybody's in love because you love happy babies.
So, oh, Dani, you have your...
Yeah, I wanted to share on that note
because the work Paloma and I do,
it's really about looking at certain movements, right?
And so for my own son, he had an asymmetrical crawl,
of course, because our kids come in to teach us so much.
And a big slice of humble pie was served on that day.
And because I'm in the brain business,
I know that crawling means so much.
And of course, my child has a kickstand crawl,
which signifies primitive reflexes aren't integrated.
But I have been working with him for a very long time.
He's almost eight years old now.
And when I met Carlton and he did a birth mask reveal,
and I learned what happened at my son's birth.
I mean, I had a home birth.
I did everything as I was supposed to.
I went very holistic and tried so hard to be perfect, right?
And I had to do everything right.
And that pressure from society, right?
Of having to hit every certain thing perfectly.
And then realizing that, oh my gosh, he possibly
broke his nose at birth.
And then that explained the breathing, which actually
is connected to everything else.
It gave me a whole new insight as to how many different things
have to come together to help support us, our children,
the family, the home.
And so I think this is such a beautiful resource of just
looking at things through a different lens of, oh my gosh,
I didn't even know that was a thing.
And it was so impactful.
You bring up a good point, Dani.
And this is the story that I left off
before introducing Carlton about my son,
is my daughter and I were doing brain balance, essentially,
and brain reorganization movements together
when I discovered writings about Carlton Terry.
And I happened to be in a class with one of my teachers,
Kate White, who was a student of Carlton's.
And she had learned about these baby movements
and how babies may be telling a story with their bodies,
where they're touching themselves,
or how if they have a kick stand, move, crawl,
how they may have been positioning themselves
in utero, and it all of a sudden dawned on me.
You know, my daughter had a C-section birth,
and we had this fallout of so much.
And Carlton telling the story today
about the program of pushing, that's me.
We use the word direct recapitulator,
but I was the rev, like always stacking my nervous system
with more, even when it wasn't necessary.
And my daughter was feeling this in my space.
But before I could actually do the somatic work,
if you will, with my son, or before the light bulbs went on,
I had to rescue myself.
And I was doing this program, which was really
helping to calm my nerves.
I was also training in cranial sacral therapy,
which was a huge healing episode for me for a number of years.
And then I could see that my son was set up
in this same environment.
But yet, because I was starting to unravel compassionately,
really starting to understand, oh my gosh,
there's a deeper story to myself.
There's a deeper story to these emotions that I'm having.
There's this implicit memories that I'm
starting to unpack from my own childhood.
It was like, wow, now I'm seeing this bigger world.
And I was able to hold my son differently
than I had with my daughter.
And by the way, I don't want anybody
to feel like she's left out, like she's
an amazing, thriving, awesome human being.
We went through a number of years with no sleep
and a lot of high anxiety.
But I've spent years helping her settle.
And she's finally come there.
But it's interesting.
I just want parents to not have to go through so much work.
Yes.
And what we're setting ourselves up for,
and what we teach at APA, is that our birth scenarios
of basically how little support there
is for women in and around birth, for their bodies
and their emotions, is that there's also
very little support for women and babies afterwards.
And how we actually birth babies.
And I'm just going to use the word trauma.
Because all of these disconnections
or disorganized brains or asymmetrical holding patterns
or whatever you want to call it, implicit memories, triggers,
they all come from overwhelming experiences.
And literally, we've had a few thousand years
of overwhelming experiences for humanity.
And so that's why we have this program.
We've got our blindfolds on.
And we're just looking at what mess
we have to clean up in front of us
and not living this full, encompassing life that
is settled and we feel at ease.
There's a lot that we have to overcome.
And I love how your program gets people on their feet.
Yes.
OK.
All right.
Now I can take some breaths.
But Carlton, I'm wondering more about this compassionate
connection that you uncover about how babies do experience
trauma in the womb.
What are some tips, if you will, that you offer in your practice
and that you teach practitioners to help mitigate trauma
for babies in the womb and even after birth?
Well, there's a lot.
There's loads of stuff.
And it all helps.
And I just want to go back for a second
because Danny said something so important about the pressure
from society to give a good birth, to do a good birth,
to be a good mom.
And oh my god, I can say I'm an expert on moms.
I'm not sure I met a mom who said in front of me,
and said, I did the perfect birth.
I'm so happy.
Everything went, you know.
And it breaks my heart because I know
the precious aspect of the feminine archetype,
the nurturing archetype.
I mean, Diana is one of my favorite goddesses, right?
You do your very best when you're giving birth.
All the way through it with the choices you have,
with the pressures you have, with the surprises you have
if you're in a hospital, with the other kind of pressures
you have.
And so a big part of our business
is getting moms to just like, oh, I
don't have to forgive myself because I
didn't do anything wrong.
When that moment enters the mother's body,
something melts away.
And we can always check it.
We could check, let's check with your husband.
Does she need to apologize for anything she did during birth?
I've never heard a husband say, yeah, she screwed up.
Never.
Yeah.
Never.
And I've seen husbands who pass out
while they're giving birth.
I've asked babies.
I've asked babies who can talk and babies who can talk
with baby body language.
Do you and mother need to apologize for anything?
And babies, you're like, what?
They don't even register.
So part of our love for the feminine and the maternal,
the Madonna, OK?
The Madonna is you did your best.
So where are you holding your shame or your devaluation
of yourself?
It's usually tied to some earlier guilt.
We could find that.
We can untie it.
We can let it go.
And whew, wow.
When you can let go of your inappropriate, improper guilt
or shame over giving birth, all of a sudden,
a lot of the stuff that your kids do that upset you
doesn't bug you the same way.
It doesn't stress you out because it
doesn't have anywhere to land.
Yes.
You're in a much more real relationship with your kid
when you're just talking about them getting their shoes tied.
That's so real.
I feel like that's, I mean, Danny, you and I've
had this conversation a million times about exactly what Carlton
just said.
And that's why we love the fact that, once again,
that we all came together, right?
Because what we're doing is we look at it
from the neurological perspective first.
That's the very first part of our program
is getting you out of that survival mode
where you're not hyper focused on the negative.
You're not looking at everything as a threat.
Every single thing your husband says, the person that
cut you off in traffic, the thing that your kid did that's
just triggering you, right?
That is also, of course, from an emotional perspective,
it's processed as, you know, it's trauma.
It's going back to your trauma.
It's hitting your triggers, hitting those wounds
that you have within you.
But from a neurological perspective,
when you go into that fight or flight mode,
you're throwing your whole body into dysregulation.
You are ready to get out of that life or death situation
when it's not, it's usually not a life or death situation,
right?
It feels like it in here.
Exactly.
That's the function of implicit memories.
They literally make you feel like it's happening now.
Yeah, exactly.
It's not happening now, but that's how they function.
And the brain is very smart, but it's also
not so smart in certain ways because it can't always
tell what's real and what's not, right?
So it's, you know, the primitive brain doesn't have logic.
It doesn't understand what's going on.
It doesn't understand, oh, yeah, this is just my phone.
And it's a message that somebody didn't answer.
It's not life or death, right?
The brain, the primitive brain is just
prepped to survive and to keep you alive.
And that's why it's so amazing, right?
We come from a place where we trained
that they were looking at the primitive brain
in a very negative way.
It was like, no, say no to that primitive brain.
We don't want that around here.
It's like, no, we do want it when it's appropriate,
when we need it, right?
And so when you're walking down the street
and there's a car that's going to run you over,
you want that fight or flight mode.
Boom, kick it.
Immediately, yeah.
Like, please, whatever you need to do, right?
But if it's an option that you can choose when you need it.
Exactly.
And that option to choose comes from being
able to have that regulation first.
And then the other piece, which is where we really come
together, all of us, is looking at the subconscious, right?
And that's the second part of our program,
is looking at all of these subconscious beliefs
that you're talking about, Carlton,
is that the implicit memories, the trauma, all those things,
they're stored all over.
And so, yeah, the first step is getting out of survival mode
so you can address the rest of it.
And that's why we call it enlightenment.
Yes.
Just like, you know, who was it?
Sarja said, no.
Who was it?
Yeah, you don't get enlightened by studying images of light.
You get enlightened by shining light
into the areas where there's darkness and see what's there.
And we can do that.
We can tiptoe into that.
We can look at it.
We could be there with it safely.
And it can become our friend.
And here's the thing that happens.
When we get hurt, when we're little,
there's a body hurt that happens somewhere in the body.
But there's also an emotional component.
It's called prosody.
It's a feeling.
It's like, am I sad about this?
And that emotional prosody, that emotional psychological content
is like glue.
And it holds together the somatic pieces.
It's one reason you can't just work with craniosacral therapy
alone and have the same results as if you're
working with craniosacral therapy
and releasing the emotions that are attached to it
and dealing with it and knowing what they are.
And so what we try to do is, you know,
craniosacral people, osteopaths, a lot of baby therapists,
they're elbow deep in the birth canal with the baby.
And we want them to know where they are.
You know, is the baby in a rotating position?
Is the baby stuck?
Is the cord involved?
And we can find all of this out now.
And that gives us a huge amount of confidence
in what to do next and how to apply what
we know with the safety of knowing this is what
the baby is telling us to do.
Yes.
That's why you want to say, do we
know how to listen to our babies?
And what are they saying?
Right?
And that's exactly right, Paloma.
Carlton, just for those who are listening,
it may be like, wait, what?
How does he understand if there is a cord involved?
But this is the process that, Carlton, you use
is birth regression research.
And this is the foundation of this concept
comes from implicit memory, that these memories are
stored in your cells, not just in your brains,
and that they can be activated.
And there are somatic markers, too.
So you have two routes to follow to get there.
Yes, there's cues or signs that babies show with their body,
and even in relationships with their caretakers
and how they respond.
But there's specific training that you
go through in order to recognize these languages
that you're talking about.
I mean, you've dubbed it baby body language.
I know we have all sorts of tools that come with it,
that somatic-based practices or regulation tools that
incorporate polyvagal theory or, as you say,
craniosacral therapy.
There's different modalities that
support how to decode the story that somebody is showing.
And for a baby, they can't talk to you verbally,
but they can show you energetically.
That's the beauty of it is they can't talk to you,
and therefore they cannot mislead you.
If I go to a doctor and I'm talking about my symptoms,
I may not be talking about what's wrong with me.
Babies talking, they're showing you exactly what's wrong,
and they're telling you exactly what they needed.
Pure truth coming straight from the source.
There's no persona involved.
There's no ego involved.
They're just, help, I need this attention right here,
and they can go to right where it is.
Yeah.
Oh, well, that's why I read your book all the time,
New Parenting Can Change Your World,
because it also says less stress,
including the cure for colic.
Because we actually, in therapy with babies,
we can tell by their cry, their prosody of their cry,
what emotions they may be feeling
and how we can map that back to a very specific time
during the birth, or their birth journey in the womb
of what may be happening to them in their environment,
what may be happening to their caretakers.
Because babies remember these things,
and it's programmed in.
So I-
Yeah, not explicitly, but implicitly they remember them.
And there's such a clear difference.
Now, finally, this language is getting into our world,
explicit memory.
Yes.
I had a cup of coffee when I was talking to those guys.
Implicit memory was, my hand knows how to get the coffee
up to my mouth, I'm not even thinking about it.
It's just my body does it.
One of the pioneers in the pre and perinatal sciences,
who's an embryologist, Joop van der Waal,
he says the embryo within us is always present.
Our younger selves, this is the whole idea
of the inner child journey.
We carry this youngest part of ourselves.
You even said it, Dani, when you're explaining,
you can tell how they move,
where they've left off in their development,
or where there's what we call in our terms, ruptures.
And where those ruptures are like little landmines
or emotional triggers waiting to be found,
like Carlton said, coming knocking on your door
because healing always wants to happen.
And I'm just so grateful that all of us
have been able to come together.
And this is a preview of our talk that we're gonna do at APA
during birth psychology month in March, next month,
just a few weeks away, but March 22nd,
we will all be coming together
to give a little bit more in-depth details
of exactly what we're talking about.
Specifically, how maybe even these postures in the womb
are leading to what you see in your work,
like the crawl and the primitive reflexes
that aren't inhibited.
So I know we're gonna explain and uncover more details.
So stay tuned.
And Carlton, we can reach you through ktbabysherapy.com.
Yeah.
And Dani, how do we get in touch with you guys
at In the Cortex, who almost got that?
Yeah.
I do the contact piece.
You can, our website is inthecortex.com.
You can always email us at hello at inthecortex.com.
And our social media has so much information.
If you wanna, if you're a video person,
we have so many videos on there.
Our Instagram is inthecortex.us,
and our TikTok is in underscore the underscore cortex.
And we have tons of info there.
Oh, that's great.
And I, me signing off with APA,
we're at birthpsychology.com.
And again, I'm the director of education there.
And I am so pleased that all of us could get together.
And I'm excited about what future endeavors that we have
as our worlds start to collaborate and unfold
into understanding how we can build
more compassionate connections with ourselves,
with our children, well, with everybody.
So let's get on board with this whole nurture revolution.
Yeah, like I know.
I'm so excited that this information
is starting to get more mainstreamed.
And it's not as crazy.
And even me having my kids four and eight years ago,
I was so lost.
I was focused on the things that we thought
we should be focused on, baby registries
and that sort of stuff.
When I wish I did a whole lot more work
on the emotional stuff.
And really diving into the importance
of the pre-imperianatal psychology
because that's what really matters.
That stroller you're gonna outgrow in a year, you know,
like two.
But those thoughts are everlasting.
And I love that these conversations are being had
and we are forging a new way for parents to find this.
And I know there's a huge sense of people
wanting to get on board with this.
And I love that it's accessible
and it's really not too crazy.
And like we talked about before,
you don't have to have a crazy degree
to really understand what's happening
in the communication aspect.
So we're excited to be a part of this.
So thank you.
This is one thing that feels so important to me
is that when you use the word science,
it scares people.
We say pre-imperianatal sciences.
I don't feel like I ever talk about anything
that's not self-evident.
And if I have to describe it, then I start doubting.
So if it's self-evident and you can believe it
and you can feel it in your body,
that doesn't mean it's not science.
Oh, I love that.
So real.
Well, and it gets back to the root of what's broken.
And that is our connection to ourselves
as fully functional gods, goddesses, whatever you,
like in complete control of ourselves,
that we have intuition.
And by human design, all of this information is within us.
We just have to unlock our hearts.
Yeah.
Well, I love that.
We love that.
That is 100% the way that we feel as well.
We could talk about this for hours.
This is, I'm excited.
We will return in March on the 22nd.
So join us again for a deeper conversation
about what is your baby telling you and are you listening?
Thank you.
Thank you so much.
All right, that was our episode.
Thank you so much for listening.
I'm going to do our little outro.
So remember, if you are ready to sign up for our Brain
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If you want to set up a free 15 minute call,
all of that info is on our website.
It's inthecortex.com.
Thank you so much and we will see you next week.
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