Hi and welcome to the In The Cortex podcast. We are your hosts. I'm Paloma Garcia and I am
Danny Paraconi and we're the founders of In The Cortex, an online community with programs that
show people the tools that they need to change their lives through brain reorganization. No
medication, just movement. When you get your brain out of survival mode and regulate your
nervous system, you start to live in the fun logical part of the brain, the Cortex. Subscribe
today and learn how to live your best in the Cortex life. And now on to today's episode.
Welcome back to the In The Cortex podcast. We are happy today to talk about how, why it's okay
to sometimes not be in your Cortex because, well, there's a lot of, we're gonna, we're gonna get into
it. There's a lot of nuance there, but let's start to talk about it a little bit. We also are gonna
talk a little bit more about our program because lots of people have questions about that and kind
of why, I guess, ultimately the philosophy behind why we've set it up the way we have to be a lifestyle,
not just like a three month situation, right? And I think the first thing that you, I mean,
you and I talk about this all the time, Danny, is like, again, the expectations of society. I say
this every single episode, I will continue to say this every single episode is we have this, this
idea about like how we're supposed to operate and when we start working on ourselves and figuring
out ways to feel better, ways to get to the things that have happened to us, whatever. And we have
this idea that it always has to be upward, right? Has an upward trend. You always have to be growing
all the time, advancing all the time. And like, there's like a checklist and a checkpoint. And
then when you're done, then you're all set. And that's, do you think that's realistic?
Absolutely not. And you know what, I love that we're having this conversation because when we
start talking about the world of personal development and bettering yourself and being the best version
of yourself, sometimes I feel like people look at us, maybe this is just my feeling. And they go,
well, why don't you have it all together yet? I'm like, knock, knock, I'm a human like, it's
there, it's a process. Like I'm so much better than I was 14 years ago. And I now have tools
to work through it. But again, we're humans and humans have emotions, humans have the contrast,
the expansion, my favorite thing, the yin and yang, right? You can have the dark without the light,
you can have the light without the dark, you have to experience it all, because that's what
we're doing here as humans. So when you embrace the fact that like, you know what, and I tell this
to my kids a lot too, is right now, mom is totally in her ponds. I am ponds and out right now. And
that means my survival brain has come online, it's decided to be the boss for a minute,
and it is taking charge of the situation. And I can feel it, like we all know that feeling of
dysregulation, I'm obviously past the part of being completely checked out, you know, when people
get the dilated pupils and they say things and it's almost like they black out, I don't do that.
Have I done that in the past, probably many, many years ago, where I was like, what just happened,
what did I say and do? But now I can recognize it. And that's why, Pauline was saying it's a lifestyle.
Well, I also think that's going back to like, 2020, I guess, when we started to design this program,
that's why we did it the way we did it. Like, let's give people this solid piece of like the
foundation for the neurological system to kind of get it together, you know what I mean? Like,
to the central nervous system to understand how to regulate and then keep going. And I think
that's why we've decided to give people lifetime access, because at first we were like, oh, no,
it's going to be 12 weeks long. And then we noticed like, well, that's maybe not enough. And sometimes
people need a little bit more and like, you and I are constantly going back. So why are we only
giving people 12 weeks? Remember, like, we went back and forth about this so much. And it's like,
no, let's leave it as lifetime access for everybody, because these are tools that
everybody in the program who really has done it will tell you they'll come back to it. We have
people that started with us literally in 2020, like summer of 2020, we launched, we're still
coming to office hours, and we're still doing the program. And we are so grateful for them,
because they truly have really taken it on and made it a part of their lives. And that's also
another piece of the program that I think is important in this whole, it's okay, right? Situation
is we have it set up in a way that fits into your life, however you want it to fit. And that's
something that I haven't seen in many other similar programs, at least the ones that do, I know,
like brain work and primitive reflexes and that kind of stuff. It's very much like, you need to
drop everything and move to a different place for, you know, a period of time and do this intensive
thing. And that's not always the issue with that is that that's not always going to be there, right?
If you don't have a professional guiding you through the whole thing every single day in your
house, right? So how do you make it fit into you? And that's not to say that we don't appreciate the
fact that in person, of course, you're going to get a lot more like hands on experience and stuff.
But this is ultimately the point of this is to get people to be able to do it at home whenever
they need it. And so after you have that solid foundation of the 12 modules, they're not weeks
anymore. They're 12 modules now. We suggest you do at least one week per module. You can do more
lots of people stay on a module for a few weeks. And after that is when it really comes in handy
because you get to go back and be like, Oh, what was that exercise that I really loved? And as your
brain continues to develop and can you're regularly you're ready, relating your nervous system more,
you process things so differently. Like this has happened to you and me when we go back even
to things we've done like a year ago, we're like, What were we thinking? Why did we write that word?
It's right, I guess, like that's kind of like one of the biggest pieces of it is like we really
do want it to be something that's in your life and it just becomes a part of who you are because
it's a part of who we are. And honestly, we have so we've the process since 2020, we've overhauled
the program changed how we've shown it to the world in so many different it's evolved so much.
And at the same time, Plum and I at this last revamp that we did a few months ago, we're like,
Okay, let's commit to it. We're asking all of our members to do it. Let's do it the exact same way.
Yep. And because before and this goes back to when we first learned all this stuff many years ago,
we had the impression that you're supposed to just do it for a finite amount of time and then you
would be done and everything was fine because in an ideal world, right? A baby goes through these
developmental milestones. And then their brain's like, cool, I got it, I don't need to do it anymore.
And then it's set for life. But the issue with that is that we're not living the same life anymore.
If you go back a few episodes, we dive deep into that topic of how different our world is today.
So that's when Paloma and I were like, wait, we need to be committed to doing this daily because
it's like any daily practice, it requires constant tending to exactly once we went, we're now on module
five of level two, which is about doing it for 10 weeks now. And it's incredible. It's taken me to
another level in all of my life stuff. It's taken me to the place of actually having the gas to get
through an entire day with my two young kids and keeping myself regulated and managing all the
things I have. So I was like, okay, this really works. So when we talk about what we do, a lot of
times people are like, wait, what? They don't get it. And it takes so long to educate what is even
brain reorganization. But let's say you already know what it all is now at this point. And now
you're like, well, what does the program look like? Like what does this daily life look like?
And so we like to give you a little heads up of what does it look like when you sign up,
you get an email, you go into your login, and then we have it listed out where you go through our
intro part of the course, we're teaching you about the brain, you're learning about the vestibular
system, the propriocept, all the sensory systems, you're learning about the brain functions, the
reflexes. And then we take you through all these other fun things and we have you get totally prepped
and ready. So you know exactly what to do when you get home and you're ready to start the process.
And then each module we have listed out gives you the overview, what exercises you're doing. So
you're watching videos, you're recreating the videos at home, you're doing journaling prompts,
if that floats your boat, if you're in then you're doing assignments. And then you're also
interacting with us because we're asking you to submit videos. So then you're sending us videos
of what you're doing at home, we're giving you feedback. So you're not just like doing this and
not you have no support. Community for us is so important because we all know healing as a community
is just so much more powerful. So we have you submit your videos and then we are so accessible,
because we are so passionate about changing your brain that we're almost like too accessible sometimes
because we're just obsessed with talking about this. And so then we have office hours, and then
you bring your questions there. And then there's another group of people who are also going through
the same thing. And then we have the Facebook group and we have an accountability group,
which has been really taking off lately. Yeah, that was been popping off lately.
It's amazing. Everyone just says, Hey, did my brain record it in for the day? Because it's just
that a little extra dopamine hit of like, Yeah, cool, I'm doing this and I'm in a group working
towards something better and greater. So it's honestly, I get my brainwork done in 20 minutes.
Yeah, or less. And I'm doing this with my kids too. And that 20 minute time that I just took
when people say, Oh, I don't have the time, I don't have the time to do this. But and we also
are talking about it's okay to not be in your cortex. But at the same time, my like moments of
not being in my cortex are so much shorter. And they don't have nearly as much of an exhausting
impact as they used to be. When I used to go into my ponds, I used to take hours, weeks.
Oh, totally. That's something that most of our members, I somebody talked about on one of the
cortex moments, a couple of episodes ago, like, it's, it just your baseline is just so different.
Right. And so, and it depends on its little things sometimes, but it's also just, you really do feel
the difference between when you do it and when you don't, I just noticed that because I took a break
for like five days, maybe when my friends were here for the wedding. And I couldn't tell and I
kept being like, why can't I know my biggest thing is being disconnected from my body, right?
And so not really understanding the signals, not really feeling the differences. And I was like,
huh, I don't really feel that big of a difference when I don't do it. And then I did it. And I was
like, bro, like, everything, like just everything, like the way that I was processing everything
was through a positive filter rather than a negative one. And I don't notice, like, I think in general,
I'm a very like upbeat positive person, but I don't notice that I do have a lot of like ways of being
like, you know, like getting annoyed by little things or reading into something and that kind of
stuff that is definitely my brain, right? And disconnecting from my body again, like being
able to understand more of like my body signals. I know it sounds like it's not a big deal, but it
is. It is like truly being like, oh, I am, am I hungry right now? Or am I just bored? Like that
kind of stuff or being able to just have an interaction that I know would have annoyed me
a couple of days ago because of that, I think is just a huge thing. And so that's my biggest
also reason is it's really easy to fall off like it is from everything, you know? And it's like
going to the gym, like meditating, like any practice that people do to feel better, to improve their
body, their mind, whatever it might be. It's so easy to fall off. And then when you're off,
your brain doesn't remember, doesn't care about what it was like to be on. It's gonna be like,
you're good, you're fine, literally forget about it. Like, creepy and crawling. What's that? Bye.
Like, and it's so easy to go into that, that place. And so that's why we're saying like, it's okay,
we're there all the time, maybe not all the time, but we go there often where we're like,
I didn't do my brain work for however long, you know, and it's not the end of the world.
And I think that's also a bigger piece of it is that you and I are very honest, I think with
our members, like they have our phone numbers, they can text us and ask us questions. And we're
always like, totally 100% honest of like what's going on in our lives. And being true that this
stuff is nothing is ever going to be your one stop shop. You know what I mean? But this can get you
closer to that. Oh yeah. And when you say fall off of just doing it, it's funny because I made a
commitment to doing it and I've only missed in these like past 10 weeks, I've missed maybe four
or five days total. And I've never been that committed to really anything lately in my life
of like, no, I've got to keep going because the time I would spend on my emotional dysregulation
because mine was emotional dysregulation. I almost disconnect from everybody. I'm emotional. I am
the most emotional person. The really old girl. My daughter just like, okay, this is exhausting.
So for me, when I spend, how much time was I spending dysregulated was so much more time
than that 20 minutes a day commitment. And so when people say they don't have the time, I'm
always like, well, what are you spending your time on? And that's the thing that we help you with in
our program too. We bring in journaling questions that help you go deeper into what is that life you
want to live? And then how do you get there? And it's something for me that and we fall off of it
because when you start to do your brain work, the changes are so subtle. It's the you that has always
meant to be here because it's the real you. We always say it's the real you without your reflexes
coming in and interrupting things or without your lower brain coming online and constantly
putting you into survival mode or dysregulation. And that real you is like, oh, life is easier.
Okay, cool. It's like all of a sudden when you've attained that body that you've been working so
hard on, you're like, okay, now I can go have a million cheat days. And then all of a sudden,
you're like, Oh, what happened? I fell off. I don't feel as good anymore. And it takes a bit of time
to get back into that groove. So for me, I just planted in my head, this is what I need to do
for the rest of my life. So I can just be a happier, more balanced person. Exactly. I have
so many stressors in my life. Again, that's probably more my subconscious stuff of like,
why do I have so many things on my plate constantly? Well, you're a mom, though. Right.
That's the reality. That's the reality. Yeah, but then I'm talking about always adding more things
like adopting a horse when I know nothing about horses. Like, what was that? Anyways,
we've worked through that stuff now, we're not pulling on things. And I'm learning my boundaries,
which is great. Again, from having my brain at a survival mode, I'm not in that people pleasing
state anymore. And now I'm like, you know what? No, I'm sorry, I can't help you. I'm maxed out.
There is so much more time you can spend on the things that you love when you are not spending
it on the things when you're dysregulated. But again, it's okay that you have moments,
that you fall apart, you become an emotional mess, you forget about your body being connected to you,
and you have a bad day because you need to have them to give you perspective and to help you see,
hey, now I don't want to be here anymore. This is what I do to get out of it. And that turnaround
time is so fast. When you do it. And it's also just a part of life. There's always going to be stuff.
And going back to what you were saying earlier about when we learned this, it was like, okay,
you just have to do this amount of hours, and then you're done forever. And I remember
you and I kind of grew in this way together because we were like, no.
Are you sure? Because I've done a lot of hours and it's life is still happening. So this is
interesting. Then I think honestly, when a lot of this stuff was researched in the 50s,
maybe that was true. Maybe they really did only need to do a certain amount of hours.
But we have so much stuff going on nowadays. Like, hello, we're staring at a screen eight hours a day,
most of us, lots of us, when then we're starting a smaller screen later when we're at home. And
there's just so much stuff that's going on. There's so many different toxins in our food.
And just, we're not even going to get into it because we talked about that in that other episode.
But there's just so much stuff that's overwhelming our system, and it's not prepared to deal with it.
And I think that's why this stuff is truly so powerful because it literally takes,
like you said, 20 minutes, but also sometimes I'll do less. I can decide sometimes, I'm just
going to do five minutes right now that I'm going to go on the computer on the call of Danny,
then later I'm going to do my patterns, which are the movements to integrate the primitive reflexes.
And then in the evening, I'm going to do a little bit of crawling, or creeping,
crawling however. And that just makes my day move faster. It makes it so that I'm not on the
computer all day. And I know I'm doing something when I'm moving and know I'm doing something for
my brain, then it makes me feel just that huge difference in the regulation. And like you said,
the other day on the group, I didn't have time to do everything, but I did creeping and this one
thing. So it's great. So it's also, it's so flexible. And once you get to know the exercise,
you really know which ones resonate most with your brain, right? And like what you're feeling,
I don't know what changes in the moment. Some of them you can even do when you're in the moment,
when you're starting to feel that dysregulation, right? Which I think is more, it's more common,
I think for people to feel the dysregulation, you feel where you're like, I'm anxious, or I'm,
I'm having this like huge emotional reaction to something. And there are a few exercises in
the program that you can do like that, wherever you are, and it'll help you, your central nervous
system be like, okay, I can calm down, I can process this in a more logical way. And we haven't
even talked about the brain breaks, we have a whole section of brain breaks that are quick
movements that you can do, they're all brain gym movements that help you with different parts of
the way that you're processing things, maybe if you're preparing to, to read something, if you
want to listen better, if you want to feel more focused, more energized, and that's a whole other
piece that you can also use kind of sporadically as well. Totally. And the best part is, is my
four year old can do it alongside me, my dad who's in his later seventies can do it. And it's,
it's really catering to the person who really wants change to happen in their life without
having to think their way through it. And so many times when we share what we do, people always come
to like, Oh, but I'm okay though, right? Like, and I think there's such a stigma with helping your
brain that everyone just assumes that if they participate in our program that there's something
wrong with them, we have people who sign up with our program that have a proper diagnosis. Some
people who've self diagnosed, we have people who are just like, you know, life is just harder than
it needs to be. Or some people are like, I don't know, I don't think anything's really like that
hard in my life, but why not try this and see what happens? Yes. And so that's why this program is
great because every single one of those people are going to experience a change. And, but then at
the same time, it's okay if you are along the journey like Paloma said, and you're like a die
hard person like me who really want to change immediately to happen because my life was just
so incredibly hard. And I committed so much time and effort in the beginning to just getting
through the first movements. And I remember the first few weeks of brain organization just being
so hard. Yeah, I was challenged beyond belief, like it was, and this isn't to scare anybody,
this is just to share that my life was hard, and those movements were really hard and that
matches and it will always match. So if you get on the floor, don't forget tag us, remember tag
us in your video so we can go ahead and give you a quick little assessment. And if you're
listening to this, you're like, I don't understand how hard can this really be, trust us. If your
brain is not primed and wired for this, then it will be challenging for you. But that'll also
match what your day looks like. And the other thing you don't know, just like Paloma said,
you don't know that you have these things happening until they're gone. Yep. And she
experienced it the reverse way. So she was just going about her day and then she brought the
movements back and was like, Oh, wow, that did help me get the test feel different. Yeah. Yeah. And so
that is the first few weeks, you're going a lot of changes people experience are
increase in appetite, increase in feeling wanting to sleep more. Maybe you go through the regression
process. And we've talked about this before where if you're organizing a closet, everything has to
come out, right? It's the same thing for your brain. If you're organizing your brain, everything
comes out before it can go back and organize. And not everything, but a lot of the behaviors
you're experiencing in your day to day life. Let's say if you're a child who's having a
challenge with potty training, you might see that increase and get harder in the beginning.
If you're already a person who's impatient, the regression process might make you feel more impatient.
It's all things that are already within you that just get intensified. And sometimes people go,
is this regression? We're like, yep, celebrate. And they're like, I don't celebrate feeling worse
in the beginning. It's like, well, that's the process. Things have to get a little bit worse
before they can get better. So when you are wanting to take this program on, just know, in the beginning,
it might be a little challenging. But once you push through that, then you're through it. You
don't have to experience the wedding the better anymore. You don't have to experience the impatience
that you're experiencing every day. And when you do experience it, you have something to do about it.
Exactly. You have the tools. I was honestly having a rough day, I would say last weekend. And I was
editing our own podcast. And I was listening to the words that we were speaking. And I was like,
wow, these are great reminders that it's okay to feel kind of yucky. And I think I would have sat
in my misery for longer in the past. I know I would have. And then I would have tried to enroll
a bunch of people into my misery with me. Right. Sorry, Sam, I enroll you often. And I'll work on
that. That's my fiance. He gets a lot of the things going on with me. But that's a partnership,
right? But I also noticed just like, okay, I have these tools, I can get myself through this yucky
feeling. So while I was listening to the podcast, I was like, you know what, I'm going to listen to
the podcast and do my brain work. And that's an amazing way to get your brain back on track.
And just embrace like, it's okay. I was telling people, it's okay that I was feeling emotional,
like I'm finally at peace with that. Yeah. And I think it's also like this whole like,
it's okay to not be in your cortex. I think the other piece of it that I wanted to touch is like,
it's okay to have certain challenges. It's okay for everything not to be super easy for you. It's
okay to be somebody who maybe has a little bit of a harder time with certain tasks. Maybe you're
somebody who isn't great at certain things. And you know, maybe you're not super sporty, maybe
you're not super, what's it called? Like academically oriented, right? That whatever it is, that's
totally fine. And it's also, once again, there's nothing wrong with you. It's just things can get
a lot easier. And so I think a lot of the time when we post things on Instagram or on TikTok,
people will say, oh, that's me, like what's wrong with my brain? And it's like, it's,
there's nothing wrong with your brain. It's just figuring out what to do, right? And these are just
signs of something that's inside your brain. But if songs get stuck in your head, there's nothing
wrong with you. It's what's, what's annoying is when they get stuck for days and days and days,
and you can't think of anything except for the song. Like you were just asking about the song
that I was singing on right now. I didn't even notice it. Like it's just something that my brain
does. And I've been doing all the brain work and it's just something that it does, but it doesn't
become like the most annoying thing in the world where it used to where I'd be like, oh my God,
I cannot sing this song again. And two seconds later, I'd be like singing the same thing. And so it
was genuinely impacting my life. I would get so angry because then I would have the song again,
I would get so angry. I would stop like wanting, I would berate myself for like, why does this
happen to me? It's so like silly, but it's so annoying. And then I would go into this kind of
like sensory thing where I'm like, I just, I need to listen to the song again, or I need to not
listen to anything, or I need to go, you know, step away from people or whatever it is. And
I don't need to do that anymore. I'm like, okay, well it's there. It's not the end of the world.
And it doesn't create that whole like, you know, bubble of like, you know, and it's part of my
brain. Like that's it. And the part that's so fun about that is that since I do my brain work too,
I can just like, what are you doing versus me? Oh my gosh, she sings that song one more time.
Like, in the past, I would have totally noticed myself just getting annoyed with the person who
couldn't stop singing the song. And that happens so many times in families of one profile triggering
the other profile and by profile, they mean brain profile. So like, for example, say that there's a
person who's really sensory seeking and they just need to touch, touch, touch, like that's my son,
he just wants to touch everything and everyone all the time. And then I get overstimulated
and get touched out. I know a lot of moms can relate to that feeling where you're just like,
oh my gosh, I need my body back stop touching me. But for brain work, I would just like,
it would come to that point of like, you're, you're like, ignore, ignore, ignore. And then it got
to the point where you couldn't and you can't ignore it anymore. You explode. And now I can just
like gently grab his hands and be like, do you need a hug? Like, do you need like, what does your
sensory system need? So now we can just coexist with our needs, right? And we're getting met in a
healthy way. That's the key. Getting your need met in a healthy way. It's okay if you get
song stuck in your head. It's okay if you need to move around a lot when you're learning something
new. It's okay if you feel a little frustrated and traffic, but what can you do about it? What's
the right way or what's the way to get the need met? Right? And that's where we come in. And
that's where in the cortex is that lifestyle of recognizing having the awareness. This is how
I'm feeling. This is what my system is wanting and needing. How do I get that need met? And so
much of society does not know how to get a need met because there's no awareness to it. Right?
And then we just try to ignore it and then we just push it off. So kids are displaying these signs
very early on. Well, we look at, yeah, then we look at the symptoms. We don't always look at the
causes, right? For people's behaviors and forgetting these needs met. We don't always know what it
really means. Like you said, kids don't have, a lot of the time kids haven't figured out their
compensations yet. They haven't figured out their coping mechanisms. So it's very, it's more obvious
in them that it is in adults, but we say this all the time, a kid with a disorganized brain becomes
an adult with a disorganized brain unless it's addressed. When our kids are showing these behaviors
of trying to get needs met and we ignore them and then we start to label them of whatever, because
remember society has such big expectations for us. Yes, it does. And so then we start to, that's when
all that subconscious comes in and there's something wrong with me and I went around my whole life
thinking something's wrong with me because I had such big emotions and I honestly feel like I'm
now standing in that space of like, I am emotional. That's fine. I am an emotional person. I wear my
heart on my sleeve. I will not be able to walk in a room and hide who I am and I will be honest
with anybody who asks me what's going on. I'm not great and so many people now who know me.
I'm pretty bubbly and then all of a sudden I'm like, oh, your, your energy's low and they're
like, are you okay? And I'm like, no, I'm not. I'm dealing with a lot of things right now and it's
hard and that's okay too. Yeah. So, and then I never want someone to think that, you know,
we're being the victim here because then we do have the tools to empower ourselves to get through
it. And so it's just like, okay, I'm going to switch this pattern up. I'm going to do this
differently. And that's our hope for everyone is to be at peace with who you are, embrace all of
you, your authentic version, and then know that there's something you can do to help shift it,
come out of it and be even better. And it's never ending. It sounds exhausting sometimes. There are
times when I'm like, why, but then that is such a fleeting moment because the what's wrong with me
moment was so much longer and louder and more annoying than anything. And now this moment of
like, okay, I'm a little bit tired having to constantly look at myself and be like,
what can I do differently? Oh, totally. There's like so many like
tic-tacs about this. Like when did like, why I get it? Like, why do I have to keep always looking
at? And that's also another part of like, why we want to do this episode is like, sometimes it's
okay to just vent and be like, I'm annoyed about this thing. And I don't have to turn every single
moment into a growth moment. If I don't feel like it, sometimes I'm just going to be annoyed. And
then I'm going to get over it. I'm going to go crawl it out. And that's fine. And sometimes I'm
going to look at something and say, Hey, this has a deeper message for me. What's going on, right?
And that's another thing. Cause I feel like also there's this moment of like, or like, I think
out there right now in the whole, you know, like you were saying this world of self-improvement
and all this stuff, every single thing that happens is like, what's my block? Like, what's
going on? Like, what am I, what's, what's, what's, what does this mean about me? Like, why did I
choose chocolate instead of vanilla ice cream? Like, what's going on? Like, no, sometimes it's
okay. And you're just going to do something that not everything means something. And even if it
does mean something, you're not always ready to deal with it. And that's literally fine. I have had
so many reconnects and which is our process for, for working on our subconscious beliefs.
I have had so many that I literally avoided you watched me avoid them for years. And then one
day I did them. I'm like, Oh, I do feel a lot better. And that's great, but I just wasn't ready.
And so giving ourselves that grace and giving also ourselves that moment to like zoom out and be able
to be able to zoom out and say, Hey, life is to be lived, not to be suffering from all this stuff,
not to be feeling powerless, not to be feeling like you're, you're tied up in all the small
things that happen in your day to day, let's really show up, like you said, in our most authentic way
whenever we can and as much as we can. And when we're prepared to, and that's something we're
also going to talk about next in the next episode. Yes. I love that. I think that's our mission
statement is just being okay with who you are right now, knowing that there are things you can
do to help shift, make life easier. You are not your behaviors that you don't love about yourself.
And it's never too late. It's never too late. I think so many people think, Oh, well, yeah,
I'm just too, that's me. That's how I am. I'm just too set in my ways. However old they are, even
though with people that are our age or younger, they're like, Nope, that's just the way I am. And
so that's the biggest, one of the biggest things too is like you can do it at any age. It's never
too late. I just had a thought and it left me and then I drew my lazy eight and it came back.
It's right. Watch her do it. Yes. Yes. So it's when you just take your finger and draw the infinity
sign in the air, start in the middle, go up to the left. It's a beautiful way to bring left and
right brain together and help your brain just go, Oh yeah, there's that thought of it retrieves
information for you. So try it the next time you have something stuck on the tibia tongue.
But what I was going to say is the self-help industry, whatever you want to call it, personal
development, whatever it is, it's very big into the concept of just surrender and let it go.
Every book we read Paloma, because we have a book club, check it out. If you want to come read with
us. The biggest message that everything gives you is being able to surrender and just get
perspective, right? Zoom out and just be grateful for everything you have. And honestly, now that
that's what I hear for every, and that's not every, I mean, there's obviously a lot of nuances and
there's a really cool stuff in there that you can read with these books, but I'm just,
Oh, we love them. I mean, that's why we're reading them. Yeah. Exactly. But the biggest message that
they all want to share with the world is just surrender, just let go, get perspective, perspective
meaning zoom out, being able to see like everything that is working for you. And Paloma and I will
scream this from the rooftops. You cannot do that in survival mode. You cannot do that when
you're dysregulated. And that's why we love what we do so much is because we actually have gain
perspective. Like just today, we're on this gratitude kick. Like, what are we doing? We have
so much to be grateful for. And, but we can also be in the contrast of it and feel like, Oh my
gosh, my life isn't where I want it to be. And then snap out of that and step step into gratitude.
And it's a lot of that. It's the ebbing. It's the flowing. It's the back and the fourth and just,
I think my piece now is that knowing, yeah, I'm sad right now. Yeah, I'm frustrated right now.
But then here's what I'm going to do to shift out of it. And that flexibility comes. Yeah. And
that flexibility only comes when you have a regulated nervous system, integrated primitive
reflexes. Because otherwise that stuff is going to get in your way. And that's going to give you
tunnel vision. And it's not going to help you. It's not going to permit you to look at the bigger
picture. And that's ultimately what it is. Because think about it from an animal perspective.
I'm surviving. I need to focus on only what's in front of me. No distractions because I need to get
out of this moment. We know that survival doesn't look the way it does for an animal in the jungle
for us. But our brain doesn't always know that, you know, our brains are really smart. But sometimes
they just need a little help. And so that's, you know, that's a lot of what we're going to talk
about next week is like, what does that even look like? Right? Getting out of survival. And how do
we truly embrace gratitude when we are in this dysregulated moment? And how do we get to the
regulation so we can actually do all these amazing things that we want to do? Right. And well, that's
yeah. What I was going to say, if someone says, oh, just be grateful for what you have and you're in
that space of dysregulation, that's like that toxic positivity that people around and you're like,
I can't, I can't get out of this. And when people say, oh, just count to 10 or go for a walk, those
are great things, but they're not getting to that root of really unlocking you from that lock state
of mind. And that's where I was for so many years of my life as I was just like, how do people have
that flexibility with their mind to be able to say, I'm sad right now, and I know what I can get out
of it. Like I would just be like, I'm sad. I think I'm sad for the rest of my life. And then I would
sink into depression and be like, wait, is there a way out? And so that's what brain work has done
for me. And that's what our community does. So when you decide that you're finally ready to start
changing the way your life is and how you're showing up in the world, and you're like, I've been
working way harder than they need to, we're here for you. That's what our community does. We support
each other, we build each other up. We also talk about the things that are hard, we help each other
see a different way of looking at a situation. And we honestly offer it at an unbelievable price.
And I don't want to sound like we're, you know, pumping our own or tooting our own horn, I should
say. We are to do like, amazing. We, we have figured out how to make it so we can operate at the
level we are and giving the quality of information and help and support at a price that you can
afford. All you have to do is like, just like not go to Starbucks for like a week and you would be
able to pay for our program. It's $37 a month for 12 months. And then once you've finished those
payments, you have access, you are now locked into our community and you have us at your disposal
coming to office hours for life. You get to email, we stay connected to our members. We love doing
it because we want to encourage more of this world to be in their cortex. And then we support you
when you're not there too. So because we're all going in and out of that. Exactly. We are going
to be raising our prices next year. So we want to put that out there that right now is the time.
If you want to get in on this, it's now because you don't have to start the program right now.
But what better way to shift your life than starting to reorganize your brain and 2024 is
like around the corner. Exactly. Get it, get it going now and set yourself up and give the best
gift in the world, which is an organized brain to your loved ones, you know? That, I mean, one of
our, one of our members just told us because we never know where people find us all the time.
And she's like, you know how I found you guys? I found your program and I was like,
oh, it's a little bit expensive for my budget right now. And she asked her parents to give it to her.
And she said it is one of my most favorite gifts I've ever received because it's a gift that just
keeps giving. We love our member. I don't know if you can tell, but we are obsessed with them. And
also like honestly, the whole point of doing this like in the way that we do it and out of
this clinical setting where it's usually done is we are human and we're here talking and we
really take it with as much levity as possible because that's, you know,
Gabor Maté talks about that, right? Like when you're recreating your, your things that have
happened to you, your recreation, it's also, you know, recreation is also play and hanging out and
being, you know, having fun and looking at the light side of things. And that's what kids do. And
this is, I mean, this is a lot of what he says in his book is latest book is we have to give it
that side of that levity and that playfulness and that, that other side of it, right? The lightness
to the dark, you know, with the stuff that has happened to us and the stuff that we've been
through and the stuff that our brain and nervous system are going through currently. We have to
give it that levity because if not, we get tied up too much in the difficulties and the not so
fun parts. And so I think that's also something we love to do with our members. It's just like
be silly and like the group check gets rowdy sometimes. It's really funny. My dad always
sends some weird things, but hey, boomers, Mexican boomers, am I right? But okay, so let's see, let's
wrap it up. I'm telling you one day, let's say, let's say in the next episode, I just stare at
all the handle. Okay, do it. Why don't have all the handles in front of me? Okay, so then I'll do it.
You do it next time. Okay. Our social media, follow us. TikTok is in underscore the underscore
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