WEBVTT 00:00:00.680 --> 00:00:06.379 What podcast reviewer 37 describes as an indiscriminate 00:00:06.379 --> 00:00:09.179 hellish ride that I would not wish on my worst 00:00:09.179 --> 00:00:12.880 enemy. The industry's elite have said time and 00:00:12.880 --> 00:00:18.760 again, man, fuck those guys. Get ready, if your 00:00:18.760 --> 00:00:25.739 ears had butts, they'd about to be fucked. Welcome 00:00:25.739 --> 00:00:37.520 to the Butt Fuck Nowhere Show. What's going on, 00:00:37.539 --> 00:00:39.859 everybody? Welcome back to another brand new 00:00:39.859 --> 00:00:43.259 episode of the it doesn't matter if we say fuck 00:00:43.259 --> 00:00:45.140 in the first minute because I already said it 00:00:45.140 --> 00:00:48.479 three times in the intro. So who cares? It's 00:00:48.479 --> 00:00:52.420 the butt fuck nowhere show. My name's Josh here 00:00:52.420 --> 00:00:54.579 today with good buddy Adam. Yes. Hello. And if 00:00:54.579 --> 00:00:56.259 this is your first time joining us, you would 00:00:56.259 --> 00:00:58.460 realize that this show is basically about butt 00:00:58.460 --> 00:01:00.619 fuck nothing. We talk about whatever the fuck. 00:01:00.619 --> 00:01:02.780 There's no like official topic. It's just kind 00:01:02.780 --> 00:01:05.640 of a. random sludge of whatever we feel like 00:01:05.640 --> 00:01:08.200 talking about that we don't have a specific podcast 00:01:08.200 --> 00:01:12.359 dedicated to yeah exactly so this episode i wanted 00:01:12.359 --> 00:01:14.340 to talk because i've done one pretty much every 00:01:14.340 --> 00:01:17.519 year that chloe has started school so like i 00:01:17.519 --> 00:01:19.280 might as well just continue the tradition so 00:01:19.280 --> 00:01:22.299 uh third grade she just started third grade yesterday 00:01:22.299 --> 00:01:25.219 it was her first day of school everything went 00:01:25.219 --> 00:01:27.280 all well you know remember back when i was talking 00:01:27.280 --> 00:01:29.709 about like when she went to kindergarten and 00:01:29.709 --> 00:01:31.870 I was like, dude, like, what if she's like the 00:01:31.870 --> 00:01:34.310 weird one? Like, what if nobody likes her? I 00:01:34.310 --> 00:01:37.989 mean, I, my fears were fucking un, un fucking 00:01:37.989 --> 00:01:40.790 substantiated. Cause she's basically like gets 00:01:40.790 --> 00:01:43.129 friends with everybody. She's like very well, 00:01:43.150 --> 00:01:44.989 well -mannered with the other students, I guess. 00:01:45.010 --> 00:01:47.390 I don't know. But, um, all the teachers, you 00:01:47.390 --> 00:01:49.269 know, the teachers like her and stuff. So everything's 00:01:49.269 --> 00:01:51.750 like going really well for her and it's awesome. 00:01:51.810 --> 00:01:54.209 It's great. She's learning well, you know, third 00:01:54.209 --> 00:01:57.459 grade new thing. I wanted to talk about this 00:01:57.459 --> 00:02:02.159 because, for me, third grade is when my degeneracy 00:02:02.159 --> 00:02:06.620 began. Like, third grade is where it all went 00:02:06.620 --> 00:02:10.719 fucking sideways on me, okay? Wait, provoked 00:02:10.719 --> 00:02:13.259 by what, though? I don't know. The essence of 00:02:13.259 --> 00:02:15.939 third grade, maybe? Okay, I could have been brought 00:02:15.939 --> 00:02:18.379 on by the Attitude Era of professional wrestling 00:02:18.379 --> 00:02:20.900 is what it could have been brought on by because... 00:02:21.379 --> 00:02:23.740 For example, I mean, I joined a street gang in 00:02:23.740 --> 00:02:25.780 third grade. That was the first time I joined 00:02:25.780 --> 00:02:30.280 a gang. I joined a street gang. We committed 00:02:30.280 --> 00:02:32.319 a lot of crime. I mean, we did bad shit when 00:02:32.319 --> 00:02:35.560 I was in third grade. That was when I saw, like... 00:02:35.710 --> 00:02:38.009 porn for the first time that was when we found 00:02:38.009 --> 00:02:41.129 the woods porn like which apparently isn't a 00:02:41.129 --> 00:02:44.770 thing for anyone nowadays because i i was i was 00:02:44.770 --> 00:02:46.889 telling somebody about this a younger person 00:02:46.889 --> 00:02:50.289 about this and they were like what the fuck is 00:02:50.289 --> 00:02:52.370 that and i'm like yeah like you never heard of 00:02:52.370 --> 00:02:54.889 woods porn like you just in any kind of wooded 00:02:54.889 --> 00:02:56.830 area wherever you were at didn't matter there 00:02:56.830 --> 00:02:59.250 would just have be just be a box of just either 00:02:59.689 --> 00:03:02.509 porn tapes or like porn mag it was mainly porno 00:03:02.509 --> 00:03:05.689 mags so it'd be like hustler or playboy and then 00:03:05.689 --> 00:03:08.270 you'd get like the real crazy shit like i don't 00:03:08.270 --> 00:03:11.469 know um big bitches on black dicks or some shit 00:03:11.469 --> 00:03:14.770 like i don't know weird shit out there but um 00:03:14.770 --> 00:03:17.610 yeah third grade is when i started fighting like 00:03:17.610 --> 00:03:19.270 when we started fighting kids and stuff like 00:03:19.270 --> 00:03:21.689 i don't know maybe it was just a perfect storm 00:03:21.689 --> 00:03:25.819 for you It might have been, but it that for me, 00:03:25.860 --> 00:03:28.259 that was when I truly turned into a shit bag 00:03:28.259 --> 00:03:30.199 was in third grade. And the transformation was 00:03:30.199 --> 00:03:33.719 not like slow. It was an immediate overnight 00:03:33.719 --> 00:03:37.539 transformation, dude. Illegally watching wrestling 00:03:37.539 --> 00:03:40.039 matches. Yeah, they were taped. Yeah, exactly, 00:03:40.159 --> 00:03:41.639 dude. That's when we started tape trading, which 00:03:41.639 --> 00:03:43.379 I mean, yeah, technically that was illegal because 00:03:43.379 --> 00:03:44.979 you weren't supposed to record that shit. Yeah. 00:03:45.500 --> 00:03:51.000 But yeah, so I really think that. it it has shaped 00:03:51.000 --> 00:03:54.039 my adult life and has given me i will say it's 00:03:54.039 --> 00:03:57.520 given me good experience and now this is where 00:03:57.520 --> 00:03:59.539 i'm going to take a turn and i'll talk more specifically 00:03:59.539 --> 00:04:02.599 about the crazy shit that we did but i am now 00:04:02.599 --> 00:04:06.180 concerned that like chloe's gonna have a hard 00:04:06.180 --> 00:04:08.900 time as an adult learning things that like the 00:04:08.900 --> 00:04:11.280 real world shit because i don't know that she's 00:04:11.280 --> 00:04:14.659 gonna get this level of degeneracy and i'm a 00:04:14.659 --> 00:04:16.920 little concerned like That she's going to be 00:04:16.920 --> 00:04:18.819 too innocent, I guess. I don't know what the 00:04:18.819 --> 00:04:21.959 word is, but like, yeah, I just I don't know, 00:04:22.000 --> 00:04:25.040 man. I don't I don't I don't know if this is 00:04:25.040 --> 00:04:28.360 good for the kids. Like, I think that this homogenized 00:04:28.360 --> 00:04:30.879 fucking childhood that they have is just I think 00:04:30.879 --> 00:04:35.019 it's bad. Like no bullying. Yeah, no bullying. 00:04:35.439 --> 00:04:41.329 No, you know, no violence. There's no. cussing 00:04:41.329 --> 00:04:43.769 there's no tolerance for like anything it's all 00:04:43.769 --> 00:04:46.410 everything's got to be super fucking politically 00:04:46.410 --> 00:04:49.750 correct like you know you can't make jokes about 00:04:49.750 --> 00:04:52.269 people like you can't say it's it's i don't know 00:04:52.269 --> 00:04:54.129 man like what do you what do you mean though 00:04:54.129 --> 00:04:59.019 like in that uh situation you learn what not 00:04:59.019 --> 00:05:01.199 to do by doing the wrong thing. Like you would, 00:05:01.199 --> 00:05:03.620 you would just dive into like doing stupid shit. 00:05:03.660 --> 00:05:06.939 Yeah. So like when you're in third grade, that's 00:05:06.939 --> 00:05:08.980 a great time to go through a degenerate phase 00:05:08.980 --> 00:05:11.139 because there really are no consequences for 00:05:11.139 --> 00:05:14.339 a third grader. I mean, yeah. Outside of killing 00:05:14.339 --> 00:05:16.779 somebody or whatever. Yeah. I mean, there's really 00:05:16.779 --> 00:05:19.500 basically no consequences. Um, whatever. Okay. 00:05:19.560 --> 00:05:21.660 You get suspended from school or you get detention 00:05:21.660 --> 00:05:24.360 or what? That's horseshit. Yeah. That's all. 00:05:24.420 --> 00:05:28.139 That's all nonsense. Um, I'm talking about real 00:05:28.139 --> 00:05:31.180 consequences. Like, in third grade, like, that 00:05:31.180 --> 00:05:33.060 was when I went up to the teacher and told her 00:05:33.060 --> 00:05:36.779 to suck it. And I got fucking, well, we had the 00:05:36.779 --> 00:05:38.959 cards still back then. So, like, you got a red 00:05:38.959 --> 00:05:42.420 card or whatever. If she doesn't get to make 00:05:42.420 --> 00:05:44.480 that mistake to learn that's wrong until she's, 00:05:44.500 --> 00:05:46.300 like, an adult and goes into, like, let's say 00:05:46.300 --> 00:05:48.620 a job and her boss pisses her off and she tells 00:05:48.620 --> 00:05:51.459 him to suck it, well, then you get fired. Now 00:05:51.459 --> 00:05:53.740 you don't have a job. Like, that's an actual 00:05:53.740 --> 00:05:57.420 consequence. So, like. I think that's not just 00:05:57.420 --> 00:05:58.839 something that's going to that I'm worried about 00:05:58.839 --> 00:06:01.439 for obviously for my own daughter, but like for 00:06:01.439 --> 00:06:03.439 everybody, for all the children, like they're 00:06:03.439 --> 00:06:07.160 all going to be just not making these fuck up 00:06:07.160 --> 00:06:08.720 mistakes. And they're going to they're going 00:06:08.720 --> 00:06:12.660 to just be, I don't know, doing this shit in 00:06:12.660 --> 00:06:16.680 the workplace. And, you know, I don't know. I 00:06:16.680 --> 00:06:18.600 just think it's bad for the development. Or what 00:06:18.600 --> 00:06:21.949 if they become NPCs because they have. They're 00:06:21.949 --> 00:06:23.529 getting programmed. What if they already are 00:06:23.529 --> 00:06:26.149 an NPC? What if that's just already too late 00:06:26.149 --> 00:06:30.810 now? Because gold programs you to a work schedule 00:06:30.810 --> 00:06:34.029 for six hours to learn his shit. And it teaches 00:06:34.029 --> 00:06:37.779 you not to stand out. Yeah, it teaches you your 00:06:37.779 --> 00:06:40.959 eight hours on the clock. You get two 15 minute 00:06:40.959 --> 00:06:43.500 breaks being recessed. You get a 30 minute lunch 00:06:43.500 --> 00:06:46.699 and you got to sit at your desk. You have to 00:06:46.699 --> 00:06:48.620 shut up, listen to the teacher talking. You have 00:06:48.620 --> 00:06:51.620 to follow instructions and do your assignments. 00:06:51.680 --> 00:06:54.459 Not question authority. Yep, exactly. And that's 00:06:54.459 --> 00:06:58.040 that's a scary fucking process. I think that 00:06:58.040 --> 00:07:00.319 also was when they really started hammering that 00:07:00.319 --> 00:07:03.160 stuff in hard. And I actively like rebelled against 00:07:03.160 --> 00:07:06.730 that. So that could be why the perfect storm 00:07:06.730 --> 00:07:09.750 of, you know, my degeneracy really happened. 00:07:09.829 --> 00:07:12.769 I mean, yeah, I joined a gang. That was that 00:07:12.769 --> 00:07:15.569 was when we first moved to fucking Corona. And 00:07:15.569 --> 00:07:19.189 yeah, I joined a fucking gang with the with the 00:07:19.189 --> 00:07:22.889 black kids. I was in the. I don't know if we 00:07:22.889 --> 00:07:25.189 were Crips or Bloods. I'm not sure. I don't remember, 00:07:25.410 --> 00:07:28.689 really. I remember that we were all wrestling 00:07:28.689 --> 00:07:31.189 fans, so we made these little ID cards that we 00:07:31.189 --> 00:07:32.769 had to have. Somebody made them out of cardboard 00:07:32.769 --> 00:07:35.610 and just paper. And they wrote your name on it, 00:07:35.629 --> 00:07:39.490 and we had a number. And the number was your 00:07:39.490 --> 00:07:44.889 rank within the group or whatever. Organized 00:07:44.889 --> 00:07:47.769 crime. Yeah, basically. And you had to show the 00:07:47.769 --> 00:07:50.149 card in order to get into the meetings and shit 00:07:50.149 --> 00:07:53.199 that we would have. And, like, if you wanted 00:07:53.199 --> 00:07:54.800 to sit at the lunch table during lunch, like, 00:07:54.839 --> 00:07:55.899 you had to have one of those cards. And that 00:07:55.899 --> 00:07:58.079 was the first time I actually got in trouble 00:07:58.079 --> 00:08:01.319 for something was when I told this kid to fuck 00:08:01.319 --> 00:08:05.079 off because he didn't have a card. I'll never 00:08:05.079 --> 00:08:07.480 forget this, dude. And if you're still out there, 00:08:07.620 --> 00:08:09.199 all right? The kid's name was Mitch. I don't 00:08:09.199 --> 00:08:10.300 remember what his last name was, but we called 00:08:10.300 --> 00:08:12.560 him Mitch the Bitch, all right? And he was just, 00:08:12.579 --> 00:08:14.600 like, this fucking, like, really weirdo kid. 00:08:15.019 --> 00:08:17.579 And if you're still out there, Mitch, hit us 00:08:17.579 --> 00:08:20.060 up, because I meant everything I said and still 00:08:20.060 --> 00:08:22.879 do. So if you held a grudge, show up. We can 00:08:22.879 --> 00:08:25.060 throw it out as adults, all right? But, yeah, 00:08:25.139 --> 00:08:27.040 I told this kid to fuck off, and the little bastard 00:08:27.040 --> 00:08:30.740 went and told on me. And so then we ended up... 00:08:30.740 --> 00:08:35.110 We ended up... we ended up uh i ended up getting 00:08:35.110 --> 00:08:37.070 in trouble and i don't know what i don't remember 00:08:37.070 --> 00:08:38.590 what happened but i ended up getting in trouble 00:08:38.590 --> 00:08:40.429 for something and the other guys were like nah 00:08:40.429 --> 00:08:43.240 fuck this And so when I was serving my, whatever 00:08:43.240 --> 00:08:45.320 punishment I had, this, this was the, this was 00:08:45.320 --> 00:08:46.899 a Christian school, right? No, no, this was at 00:08:46.899 --> 00:08:48.980 regular public school. I didn't go to Christian 00:08:48.980 --> 00:08:50.919 school until fucking like seventh grade or whatever. 00:08:51.299 --> 00:08:54.620 Um, so the regular public school was where this 00:08:54.620 --> 00:08:56.740 was at. And so they caught this kid in the bathroom 00:08:56.740 --> 00:09:01.200 and they beat his ass in the bathroom. I don't 00:09:01.200 --> 00:09:02.440 know if they gave him a swirly. They did some 00:09:02.440 --> 00:09:03.799 shit to him. They beat his ass. All right. And 00:09:03.799 --> 00:09:05.700 then Mitch, the bitch was never heard from again. 00:09:06.259 --> 00:09:08.990 But, um, Yeah, that was, he got his ass beat 00:09:08.990 --> 00:09:11.389 on my account, so that was cool. It was also 00:09:11.389 --> 00:09:13.629 a good reinforcement of, like, hey, man, if you're 00:09:13.629 --> 00:09:16.370 in the gang, all right, you get fucking, there's 00:09:16.370 --> 00:09:18.409 perks, all right, there's benefits. And so... 00:09:18.909 --> 00:09:21.970 You know, we take the shared responsibility of 00:09:21.970 --> 00:09:24.610 beating somebody's ass because we as individuals 00:09:24.610 --> 00:09:28.710 are weak. I mean, third graders are weak. All 00:09:28.710 --> 00:09:30.470 right. Third graders are weak bitches. OK, like 00:09:30.470 --> 00:09:32.470 I remember that's when I started doing pushups 00:09:32.470 --> 00:09:34.470 like and we were doing we were literally doing 00:09:34.470 --> 00:09:36.070 the prison workout because I think one of their 00:09:36.070 --> 00:09:38.789 older brothers had been in prison and taught 00:09:38.789 --> 00:09:41.539 him how to do the prison workout. So like. we 00:09:41.539 --> 00:09:43.720 literally were just doing fucking like push -ups 00:09:43.720 --> 00:09:47.299 sit -ups and fucking uh burpees just all just 00:09:47.299 --> 00:09:50.019 all at recess we would have a every five minute 00:09:50.019 --> 00:09:51.820 we do a five minute series of those things every 00:09:51.820 --> 00:09:54.460 fucking recess and lunch and like we were a prison 00:09:54.460 --> 00:09:57.399 gang like it's crazy and so then that's when 00:09:57.399 --> 00:09:59.919 we would start going to like we started robbing 00:09:59.919 --> 00:10:01.600 from the student store like because they'd have 00:10:01.600 --> 00:10:03.080 this little store and then the lady that was 00:10:03.080 --> 00:10:04.940 in there was like this old fat lady and she was 00:10:04.940 --> 00:10:07.639 always asleep and so we would just go in and 00:10:07.639 --> 00:10:09.139 just like because because they didn't have air 00:10:09.139 --> 00:10:10.320 conditioning all right because we were in these 00:10:10.320 --> 00:10:12.080 portables because we were at a temporary school 00:10:12.080 --> 00:10:14.860 this wasn't even like a a real school and what's 00:10:14.860 --> 00:10:19.039 funny is the school that chloe goes to now that's 00:10:19.039 --> 00:10:21.879 the school that i went to um for third grade 00:10:21.879 --> 00:10:24.940 and fourth grade and It's very funny because 00:10:24.940 --> 00:10:27.019 it was two separate schools and they had built 00:10:27.019 --> 00:10:28.759 a temporary school in the back. And that's the 00:10:28.759 --> 00:10:31.340 one that I went to. And now it just became part 00:10:31.340 --> 00:10:32.820 of that school or whatever. And they have permanent 00:10:32.820 --> 00:10:34.799 buildings and shit. But we had these fucking 00:10:34.799 --> 00:10:37.080 portables and none of them had fucking air conditioning 00:10:37.080 --> 00:10:39.179 because this was back in the 90s when they didn't 00:10:39.179 --> 00:10:41.960 believe in that, I guess. And so this lady would 00:10:41.960 --> 00:10:44.500 just be asleep all the time because it was like 00:10:44.500 --> 00:10:46.460 100 degrees in there. And, you know, she was 00:10:46.460 --> 00:10:48.720 an old fat lady. And so obviously you just fucking 00:10:48.720 --> 00:10:50.840 conk out. And so we go in there and steal candy 00:10:50.840 --> 00:10:53.740 bars. There was one time we stole the. till like 00:10:53.740 --> 00:10:55.600 we stole the whole fucking amount of money that 00:10:55.600 --> 00:10:57.220 was in there and yeah whatever it was like maybe 00:10:57.220 --> 00:10:59.519 25 30 bucks or whatever that was in there in 00:10:59.519 --> 00:11:01.639 like change or whatever but we stole the whole 00:11:01.639 --> 00:11:04.080 fucking thing out from this fucking lady and 00:11:04.080 --> 00:11:07.379 no one ever brought it up like i don't know if 00:11:07.379 --> 00:11:09.220 it was something where she was just like not 00:11:09.220 --> 00:11:12.059 saying anything because she was like oh fuck 00:11:12.059 --> 00:11:13.559 like i fell asleep i don't want to get in trouble 00:11:13.559 --> 00:11:16.360 so like i'm just not gonna say shit and then 00:11:16.360 --> 00:11:18.639 i'll just put 35 bucks back in there myself and 00:11:18.639 --> 00:11:21.399 just fucking call it a day Um, but it never got 00:11:21.399 --> 00:11:23.259 brought up that someone was stealing. And if 00:11:23.259 --> 00:11:24.759 you're stealing, you need to stop. Cause like 00:11:24.759 --> 00:11:26.360 whenever some dumb shit like that would happen 00:11:26.360 --> 00:11:29.759 where like, like tagging, I wasn't a tagger, 00:11:29.820 --> 00:11:31.799 but like some of the other guys were taggers 00:11:31.799 --> 00:11:33.120 that were in the gang. So like they would tag 00:11:33.120 --> 00:11:34.600 shit all over. So there'd be a morning, whoever 00:11:34.600 --> 00:11:37.960 is putting gang graffiti on the buildings needs 00:11:37.960 --> 00:11:39.580 to stop. If we're doing it in the bathroom, like 00:11:39.580 --> 00:11:40.759 there'd be this whole fucking thing that would 00:11:40.759 --> 00:11:45.379 go out. And so, um, we started doing that. Then 00:11:45.379 --> 00:11:50.159 we upgraded to like liquor stores. And so, we 00:11:50.159 --> 00:11:53.460 would go and like steal candy or whatever. And 00:11:53.460 --> 00:11:55.019 then we never stole any cash from a liquor store. 00:11:55.039 --> 00:11:58.440 What small aspirations. Yeah. Well, as a third 00:11:58.440 --> 00:11:59.960 grader, you don't, you don't get it. All right. 00:11:59.960 --> 00:12:02.120 Your brain is still underdeveloped. So like, 00:12:02.159 --> 00:12:06.000 but just like stupid things. If there were things 00:12:06.000 --> 00:12:08.259 to steal, it's like, Oh, candy bars. Fuck. Yeah. 00:12:08.279 --> 00:12:10.580 Yeah. Oh, whoop. The fucking do let's, let's 00:12:10.580 --> 00:12:12.820 do, let's steal. That's still candy. Like, and 00:12:12.820 --> 00:12:14.740 honestly, we would go back and we would go eat 00:12:14.740 --> 00:12:16.539 it all. Cause it was fucking delicious. Yeah. 00:12:16.899 --> 00:12:20.820 And you know, What do you think the porn stuff? 00:12:21.700 --> 00:12:25.840 I mean, since you mentioned it. Because I was 00:12:25.840 --> 00:12:28.460 thinking about that because it is something that 00:12:28.460 --> 00:12:30.759 has appeared on television in different television 00:12:30.759 --> 00:12:34.659 shows like there's. I think there's like a Simpsons 00:12:34.659 --> 00:12:37.519 episode, a Halloween episode or whatever, where 00:12:37.519 --> 00:12:41.779 somebody just drops off porn in the middle. It's 00:12:41.779 --> 00:12:45.950 like. how how like why would somebody do that 00:12:45.950 --> 00:12:48.169 as opposed to just taking it to like a dump or 00:12:48.169 --> 00:12:52.809 whatever yeah right like personally i think my 00:12:52.809 --> 00:12:55.649 theory on the matter is that some some dad some 00:12:55.649 --> 00:12:57.529 fucking guy got caught his wife found all this 00:12:57.529 --> 00:12:59.590 porn that he had in his garage yeah and she's 00:12:59.590 --> 00:13:02.639 like you're jerking off the poor And there was 00:13:02.639 --> 00:13:03.879 this whole big thing. So he's like, you know 00:13:03.879 --> 00:13:05.200 what? I'm going to go dump this in the woods 00:13:05.200 --> 00:13:07.639 and then I can still come and view the porn and 00:13:07.639 --> 00:13:09.620 jerk off to it. Like, that's what I think the 00:13:09.620 --> 00:13:13.139 thought process was. Or there is perhaps a benevolent 00:13:13.139 --> 00:13:15.460 reason. And he is the modern day Prometheus. 00:13:15.700 --> 00:13:18.019 And he's like, I must disseminate this information 00:13:18.019 --> 00:13:21.980 to younger generations. He's like Santa Claus 00:13:21.980 --> 00:13:25.379 for porn. He just goes around. The forbidden 00:13:25.379 --> 00:13:31.559 knowledge. Fuck, dude. Porn -metheus. Holy shit. 00:13:31.659 --> 00:13:34.480 that would be awesome he just goes around and 00:13:34.480 --> 00:13:36.419 he's like just sprinkling porn in the woods everywhere 00:13:36.419 --> 00:13:40.519 if if there's ever like a nighty show oh that 00:13:40.519 --> 00:13:43.240 needs to be like one that has to be an episode 00:13:43.240 --> 00:13:46.600 it's like the main characters discover pornography 00:13:46.600 --> 00:13:50.940 through like this uh i don't know enigmatic figure 00:13:50.940 --> 00:13:53.340 that just like dropped it off and maybe they 00:13:53.340 --> 00:13:55.759 meet him once but it's only like in the in the 00:13:55.759 --> 00:13:57.460 shadows or something so they don't actually know 00:13:57.460 --> 00:13:59.299 what he looks like but he's like i would like 00:13:59.299 --> 00:14:01.379 for you to know the forbidden knowledge of some 00:14:01.379 --> 00:14:06.840 shit oh my god boys be curious about female bodies 00:14:06.840 --> 00:14:10.799 and shit yeah true story um And then so, yeah, 00:14:10.820 --> 00:14:13.379 so that was that was my, you know, third grade. 00:14:13.440 --> 00:14:16.080 We would just fight all the time. And like, you 00:14:16.080 --> 00:14:18.659 know, we I got the scar on my fucking middle 00:14:18.659 --> 00:14:20.840 finger from a fight that I did in third grade 00:14:20.840 --> 00:14:23.080 where this kid fucking scratched me with his 00:14:23.080 --> 00:14:26.200 nail and I fucking just cold cocked him his fucking 00:14:26.200 --> 00:14:28.789 face, man. Oh, I knocked him the fuck out, man. 00:14:28.870 --> 00:14:30.750 That was the first time I ever saw a kid go unconscious. 00:14:30.950 --> 00:14:32.830 Like, I was like, holy shit, did I kill him? 00:14:33.210 --> 00:14:34.889 Like, I literally thought I killed him. And then, 00:14:34.970 --> 00:14:36.629 good God, and that was that, that was exactly 00:14:36.629 --> 00:14:38.789 at the time when the hell in a, good God, they 00:14:38.789 --> 00:14:42.529 killed him. Oh, they killed him. And, you know, 00:14:42.549 --> 00:14:44.250 we would do, that was, we would also, like, we 00:14:44.250 --> 00:14:46.070 would use wrestling moves on people in our fights. 00:14:46.389 --> 00:14:48.789 Like, I suplexed a kid, like, no joke, like, 00:14:48.830 --> 00:14:53.629 straight suplexed him. And, you know, if you 00:14:53.629 --> 00:14:55.350 do that shit right, you can fuck somebody up. 00:14:55.429 --> 00:14:57.860 I mean, like, you can slam the back of their 00:14:57.860 --> 00:15:00.100 head against the ground. Um, you know, fucking, 00:15:00.159 --> 00:15:01.860 I think somebody put someone in a sharpshooter 00:15:01.860 --> 00:15:04.240 one time, like, and if you do it right, it hurts. 00:15:04.259 --> 00:15:08.200 Yeah. Um, and you can't escape. So, uh, good 00:15:08.200 --> 00:15:10.940 times in third grade, the modern generation does 00:15:10.940 --> 00:15:14.019 not have, I don't think the capability to be 00:15:14.019 --> 00:15:16.639 as degenerate as, as at least we were in our, 00:15:16.639 --> 00:15:19.460 in our young, younger time days. Yeah. I think 00:15:19.460 --> 00:15:25.809 there's too much. Uh, or just random shit. I 00:15:25.809 --> 00:15:28.769 mean, because it's like the first thing my nephews 00:15:28.769 --> 00:15:32.149 and nieces do when they get home is TikTok. They 00:15:32.149 --> 00:15:35.210 go on their YouTube or fucking Roblox. Fuck, 00:15:35.450 --> 00:15:38.789 man. Chloe's into that heavy right now, the Roblox. 00:15:38.990 --> 00:15:41.149 And I've started playing with her. I don't know. 00:15:41.210 --> 00:15:43.309 She just started playing a couple of these different 00:15:43.309 --> 00:15:45.309 games. There was one that's like a fashion game, 00:15:45.590 --> 00:15:47.070 and then she started playing. I got her into 00:15:47.070 --> 00:15:49.629 the gun games, so like the shooter ones that 00:15:49.629 --> 00:15:53.920 they have. I don't really like it because, The 00:15:53.920 --> 00:15:57.059 figurines are like your main character or whatever. 00:15:57.240 --> 00:15:59.360 It looks like a fucking Lego, but they look like 00:15:59.360 --> 00:16:02.159 poverty Legos. They are poverty Legos. That's 00:16:02.159 --> 00:16:06.200 exactly what the fuck they are. So I don't know, 00:16:06.200 --> 00:16:10.200 you know, what the appeal is. I mean, sure, it's 00:16:10.200 --> 00:16:13.399 all right. But like, it's the multitude of games 00:16:13.399 --> 00:16:15.419 that's on there because it's not just like it's 00:16:15.419 --> 00:16:16.840 not like you're loading up a game and playing 00:16:16.840 --> 00:16:19.669 Assassin's Creed or Helldivers. You're playing 00:16:19.669 --> 00:16:21.769 like you can play like a multitude. Fuck. They 00:16:21.769 --> 00:16:24.029 have an Assassin's Creed version inside fucking 00:16:24.029 --> 00:16:26.049 Roblox that you can play. You haven't you haven't 00:16:26.049 --> 00:16:28.690 thrown money at it. Oh, no. Well, I haven't. 00:16:28.690 --> 00:16:31.149 But I've thrown money at it for Chloe, you know, 00:16:31.149 --> 00:16:34.389 because she wants Robux. And, you know, Frank 00:16:34.389 --> 00:16:36.610 was a good guy and fucking he was going to buy 00:16:36.610 --> 00:16:39.970 her and his his other niece on a he was going 00:16:39.970 --> 00:16:44.049 to buy them fucking Robux. And so he was calling 00:16:44.049 --> 00:16:46.299 her to be like, hey. I'm going to get you Robux 00:16:46.299 --> 00:16:47.840 or whatever. And so he was going to spend 50 00:16:47.840 --> 00:16:50.159 bucks on Robux. So each was get 25. And she didn't 00:16:50.159 --> 00:16:51.820 answer the phone. So he was like, well, I guess 00:16:51.820 --> 00:16:54.200 Chloe gets 50. So Chloe got 50 bucks of Robux 00:16:54.200 --> 00:16:57.700 and spent it in 35 fucking seconds. Wow. Gone. 00:16:57.899 --> 00:17:00.919 What did she buy? Like just awesome. Yeah. Costumes 00:17:00.919 --> 00:17:04.400 for her, for her NPC character. She bought the 00:17:04.400 --> 00:17:07.859 VIP in the fashion game. Like, see, this is where 00:17:07.859 --> 00:17:12.819 a millennial parent, it makes sense that, uh, 00:17:12.839 --> 00:17:17.470 like, Because, you know, there was chat rooms, 00:17:17.730 --> 00:17:23.250 there was like Club Penguin and other shit where 00:17:23.250 --> 00:17:25.970 people would talk to each other, you know, probably 00:17:25.970 --> 00:17:27.789 talking to 40 year olds that probably looking 00:17:27.789 --> 00:17:30.930 to sexually assault sexually assault children. 00:17:31.609 --> 00:17:36.329 So like Robux or Robux Roblox, I think to some 00:17:36.329 --> 00:17:40.230 degree is. is a potential breeding ground for 00:17:40.230 --> 00:17:42.109 pedophiles, so I'm sure you already... Oh, dude, 00:17:42.190 --> 00:17:44.369 her shit's locked down. Like, she can't do anything. 00:17:44.470 --> 00:17:46.950 Like, she can't talk to anybody. She can only... 00:17:46.950 --> 00:17:48.990 She can't even approve her friends. Like, we 00:17:48.990 --> 00:17:51.529 have to do it. So she's... She also got my mom 00:17:51.529 --> 00:17:53.410 into playing the fucking Roblox, so she plays 00:17:53.410 --> 00:17:56.690 Roblox with my mom, like, all the time. But you... 00:17:56.970 --> 00:17:59.890 It's the fact that you already experienced that. 00:18:00.309 --> 00:18:02.630 Locked down. So they'll never get to fuck. Yeah, 00:18:02.690 --> 00:18:05.410 I experienced dirty old men in chat rooms fucking 00:18:05.410 --> 00:18:08.170 try to hit on me. Yeah. And yeah, sometimes did 00:18:08.170 --> 00:18:10.410 I pretend to be a fucking nine -year -old girl 00:18:10.410 --> 00:18:13.710 when I was nine and try to get them to, you know, 00:18:13.730 --> 00:18:15.190 fucking send me money? Yeah, of course I did. 00:18:15.769 --> 00:18:17.670 But that's because they didn't want to fuck little 00:18:17.670 --> 00:18:19.910 boys. So you have to improvise, right? You got 00:18:19.910 --> 00:18:23.450 to try to make some money. So. Yeah, that was 00:18:23.450 --> 00:18:24.990 that was it, man. Third grade was where it really 00:18:24.990 --> 00:18:26.730 turned for me. And that's where she went downhill. 00:18:26.869 --> 00:18:29.690 And so do you think she's going to go sideways 00:18:29.690 --> 00:18:33.210 at some point or it's just it's not in the nature 00:18:33.210 --> 00:18:38.730 for Gen Alpha? You know, they say they say that 00:18:38.730 --> 00:18:41.309 for girls, they're more mature than boys or something 00:18:41.309 --> 00:18:45.539 like that. They're mature sooner. I, to a certain 00:18:45.539 --> 00:18:48.039 degree, I think that's probably true. But for 00:18:48.039 --> 00:18:50.259 them, they also hit the puberty, go through the 00:18:50.259 --> 00:18:52.500 hormones and shit. And that's a problem. Yeah, 00:18:52.559 --> 00:18:54.880 that's going to be something. So I don't know 00:18:54.880 --> 00:18:57.000 if it's going to turn into... I don't think that 00:18:57.000 --> 00:18:59.059 Gen Alpha has the capability to be as degenerate. 00:18:59.160 --> 00:19:02.200 And also, I know all the tricks. I invented most 00:19:02.200 --> 00:19:03.700 of the tricks. So, like, you can't fucking really 00:19:03.700 --> 00:19:06.160 trick me into doing degenerate shit. Because, 00:19:06.180 --> 00:19:09.140 like, I very easily... tricked my parents into 00:19:09.140 --> 00:19:11.299 degenerate shit. And hell, I'll give you an example. 00:19:11.299 --> 00:19:12.859 I actually told Ruben this yesterday because 00:19:12.859 --> 00:19:14.059 we were talking about it because he was asking 00:19:14.059 --> 00:19:17.319 me something about Kid Rock. And I said, oh, 00:19:17.420 --> 00:19:19.640 dude, like. You want to know what's funny? The 00:19:19.640 --> 00:19:22.859 first fucking explicit album I conned my mom 00:19:22.859 --> 00:19:24.799 into buying for me when I was like eight or nine 00:19:24.799 --> 00:19:27.599 was Kid Rock, that first album that had Ba With 00:19:27.599 --> 00:19:29.720 Da Ba on there. And I told her, she's like, what's 00:19:29.720 --> 00:19:32.180 this? I said, oh, it's Kid Rock. And she thought 00:19:32.180 --> 00:19:34.799 that it meant like, oh, it's rock for kids. That's 00:19:34.799 --> 00:19:37.460 cool. Didn't look at the fucking cover because 00:19:37.460 --> 00:19:39.440 the cover would have immediately told her because 00:19:39.440 --> 00:19:41.740 it's literally his face. He's got like a bowler 00:19:41.740 --> 00:19:44.380 hat and he's smoking a fucking cigar. She would 00:19:44.380 --> 00:19:46.519 have immediately known that this was not for 00:19:46.519 --> 00:19:49.079 kids. And also. It had the explicit content label 00:19:49.079 --> 00:19:51.819 on there. And so I think this was like I was 00:19:51.819 --> 00:19:53.500 in third grade when this fucking happened. And 00:19:53.500 --> 00:19:55.660 so we were I remember explicitly we were at Target. 00:19:55.940 --> 00:19:58.460 We fucking did this. And I said, hey, I want 00:19:58.460 --> 00:20:00.900 to get the CD. OK, cool. I put it face down on 00:20:00.900 --> 00:20:03.200 the thing. The lady rang it up and was like, 00:20:03.259 --> 00:20:04.720 whatever. Didn't even fucking say because this 00:20:04.720 --> 00:20:07.019 was before they started checking your ID. Yeah. 00:20:07.140 --> 00:20:09.720 Which for those of you that don't know, back 00:20:09.720 --> 00:20:12.339 in the day, if you wanted to buy a CD that had 00:20:12.339 --> 00:20:14.619 explicit content label on it, you had to fucking 00:20:14.619 --> 00:20:16.440 produce an ID and show that you were over 18 00:20:16.440 --> 00:20:19.589 or they wouldn't sell it to you, which was. Insane, 00:20:19.589 --> 00:20:22.710 it's crazy now that you can just go on iTunes 00:20:22.710 --> 00:20:24.109 and download whatever the fuck you want without 00:20:24.109 --> 00:20:25.809 having any kind of age restriction checks and 00:20:25.809 --> 00:20:28.690 they'll let you do whatever. But anyways, so 00:20:28.690 --> 00:20:31.990 I got it, went home, opened that shit up, put 00:20:31.990 --> 00:20:34.009 it in my little CD player and I was like, this 00:20:34.009 --> 00:20:35.650 is the greatest fucking shit ever. He's talking 00:20:35.650 --> 00:20:37.309 about fucking whores and he's talking about smoking 00:20:37.309 --> 00:20:38.930 crack and fucking doing all this shit. It was 00:20:38.930 --> 00:20:40.490 fucking awesome. I'm gonna do all these things. 00:20:40.789 --> 00:20:43.430 Yeah, it was fucking great. And I had that shit 00:20:43.430 --> 00:20:46.259 for like a week and a half. And then my mom, 00:20:46.319 --> 00:20:48.039 I don't know what happened. If she was, she was 00:20:48.039 --> 00:20:49.619 going in to clean my room or do something. And 00:20:49.619 --> 00:20:52.160 she looked at her maybe, but she somehow figured 00:20:52.160 --> 00:20:53.980 out that this shit was not from kids. And she 00:20:53.980 --> 00:20:56.059 ganked that shit for me so quick. And I got my 00:20:56.059 --> 00:20:58.099 ass whooped for this fucking thing. Dude, my 00:20:58.099 --> 00:21:00.940 dad, my dad thought it was hilarious, but also 00:21:00.940 --> 00:21:03.660 didn't go easy on the belt whooping because he's 00:21:03.660 --> 00:21:06.000 like, it's a free. Yeah. He's like, he's like, 00:21:06.019 --> 00:21:08.460 well, man, cause he laughed when I told him about 00:21:08.460 --> 00:21:09.980 that. When she, she's like, look at what your 00:21:09.980 --> 00:21:11.660 son did. He tricked me into buying this thing 00:21:11.660 --> 00:21:13.660 or whatever. And it's called kid rock. And then 00:21:13.660 --> 00:21:15.230 showed him the thing. I'm like, I just started 00:21:15.230 --> 00:21:17.990 laughing. And then I was like, oh man, I gave 00:21:17.990 --> 00:21:20.029 him a good chuckle. I thought I would have been 00:21:20.029 --> 00:21:21.769 off the hook. Like I thought, okay, he's not 00:21:21.769 --> 00:21:22.829 going to whoop my ass. He's going to be like, 00:21:22.869 --> 00:21:24.529 you know what? Just chalk this up to experience. 00:21:25.029 --> 00:21:27.049 You know, you need to look at. I thought he was 00:21:27.049 --> 00:21:28.730 going to whoop my mom and say, like, hey, you 00:21:28.730 --> 00:21:30.410 need to start looking at this shit. How could 00:21:30.410 --> 00:21:31.789 you have looked at this and said, oh, yeah, this 00:21:31.789 --> 00:21:34.190 is definitely for kids or whatever. But, no, 00:21:34.289 --> 00:21:36.069 instead he's like, all right, took off the belt 00:21:36.069 --> 00:21:38.630 and just started whooping my ass hard, laughing 00:21:38.630 --> 00:21:41.730 the whole time. You would think it would be a 00:21:41.730 --> 00:21:43.890 wash. It's like, oh, the parent fucked up because 00:21:43.890 --> 00:21:46.890 they were more vigilant. Right. It cancels out. 00:21:46.970 --> 00:21:48.609 But, no, no, my dad whooped my ass even harder 00:21:48.609 --> 00:21:51.529 than that probably. So, yeah, and then my mom 00:21:51.529 --> 00:21:52.750 was yelling at me the whole time while he was 00:21:52.750 --> 00:21:54.089 whooping my ass. Like, this is what you get. 00:21:54.250 --> 00:21:56.049 Like, you shouldn't be tricking me. blah, blah. 00:21:56.349 --> 00:21:57.990 Well, you shouldn't be so stupid, bitch. And 00:21:57.990 --> 00:21:59.650 then whack, I got one right across the face. 00:21:59.750 --> 00:22:02.509 Yeah. But anyways, yeah, fucking. So then that 00:22:02.509 --> 00:22:06.349 led into later on. Oh, when I met the kid that 00:22:06.349 --> 00:22:08.509 had the fucking, his parents didn't give a fucking 00:22:08.509 --> 00:22:10.920 bottom, whatever he wanted. He had all the fucking 00:22:10.920 --> 00:22:13.140 explicit CDs and then he had a computer that 00:22:13.140 --> 00:22:16.200 had a CD burner on it and fucking he would sell 00:22:16.200 --> 00:22:19.259 you the CDs for fucking $10. And so that's when 00:22:19.259 --> 00:22:21.779 I re -bought that CD. I fucking bought the Eminem 00:22:21.779 --> 00:22:23.960 Slim Shady one. I bought all that shit and it 00:22:23.960 --> 00:22:26.940 was great. And then I had it and nobody said 00:22:26.940 --> 00:22:30.119 shit again. But anyways, yeah, degeneracy. It's 00:22:30.119 --> 00:22:33.579 fucking, it's hilarious and probably not going 00:22:33.579 --> 00:22:36.019 to be as bad as back in our day. Do you have 00:22:36.019 --> 00:22:37.940 anything else to say about Khloe? No, I think 00:22:37.940 --> 00:22:41.019 that's it. so you got anything else to add no 00:22:41.019 --> 00:22:43.700 i thought there was gonna be more with the no 00:22:43.700 --> 00:22:45.559 everything's great and fine and like everything's 00:22:45.559 --> 00:22:50.559 good and like you know she's good so i you know 00:22:50.559 --> 00:22:52.920 i don't know i mean i think she'll be fine but 00:22:52.920 --> 00:22:55.599 i think at 13 years old is when you're gonna 00:22:55.599 --> 00:22:57.240 run into the trouble no it's probably gonna be 00:22:57.240 --> 00:22:59.180 like 11 dude because like katie went through 00:22:59.180 --> 00:23:02.529 fucking puberty really early And so I'm anticipating 00:23:02.529 --> 00:23:04.369 that that's going to probably happen. I think 00:23:04.369 --> 00:23:06.430 you're going to get sassed at a lot. I already 00:23:06.430 --> 00:23:08.390 get sassed at now. She's probably going to. But 00:23:08.390 --> 00:23:09.789 she doesn't mean it because she thinks it's funny. 00:23:09.910 --> 00:23:12.410 Yeah. But the when she means it, that's when 00:23:12.410 --> 00:23:15.109 it's going to fucking hurt. Yeah. Oh, God. Well, 00:23:15.210 --> 00:23:17.589 in a couple. She's eight. She's turned eight. 00:23:17.650 --> 00:23:19.890 So I got five more years. So in five years time, 00:23:19.970 --> 00:23:21.589 you'll be hearing from me as to what happened. 00:23:21.809 --> 00:23:25.099 So. anyways all right well fuck if you don't 00:23:25.099 --> 00:23:26.380 got anything else i guess that's the end of this 00:23:26.380 --> 00:23:28.660 so uh yeah go check us out on all our bullshit 00:23:28.660 --> 00:23:30.579 and uh we'll see you guys on the next one whenever 00:23:30.579 --> 00:24:03.000 that is This has been the butt fuck nowhere show. 00:24:03.720 --> 00:24:07.480 Thanks for listening. Don't forget subscribe 00:24:07.480 --> 00:24:12.299 and like on Instagram and tick tock at game rage 00:24:12.299 --> 00:24:17.839 magazine. Also on Twitter slash X at game rage 00:24:17.839 --> 00:24:24.259 mag. Also visit our website, www .gameragemagazine 00:24:24.259 --> 00:24:28.859 .com for a host of other podcasts and more. Thanks 00:24:28.859 --> 00:24:29.960 for listening.