So I'm sitting there in the mall, this girl, my age, is standing in front of me, writing
down something in my journal.
And I'm like nervous, but I'm also like extremely relieved and surprised and shocked and excited.
And my friends are like over here kind of like watching, but how did I get to this point?
What was this point?
What even happened here?
Well, it all started when I decided to build funnels for companies.
I was reading a book called Dotcom Secrets and he basically said to build sales funnels.
Like it basically a website that is very optimal for converting a customer or converting
a viewer into a customer.
And so I'm learning about these and I start, oh, I should actually build them for my local
businesses.
So I start emailing them.
And this was very scary because I was shy, introverted, very small, confined comfort
zone, but I pushed myself because I knew that this was good for me, good personal growth
opportunity.
So I was emailing them and I just remember sending that first email.
That was extremely scary.
Like I don't know why, but I was literally just sitting there, contemplating whether
I should even send it.
And like my heart was literally racing.
So I sent it and then quickly I sent like some other emails and very quickly like sending
emails is not that scary anymore.
It's just normal now.
So I was like, oh, well emails aren't very effective and it's also not expanding my comfort
zone anymore.
So I got to move up to the next thing.
So then I started cold calling random businesses.
And that was actually terrifying.
That was like 10 times harder than the emails, but thankfully the emails prepared me for
the calling because you learn to recognize that kind of feeling of fear and then that
courageous feeling and like to push through it.
So I'm sitting there and I have, I literally have the number already typed into the dial
on my phone and I'm sitting at my desk, just contemplating, clicking the call button.
I'm literally like empty, not empty.
Like I'm literally so scared that my heart's beating.
Everything is terrified.
My mind is literally racing, it's literally numb and I'm just sitting there and I click
call and I'm like boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom.
And I'm so scared and they answer the phone and I'm like, do you want me to build a website?
And then they're like, no, and I hang up.
That was like terrifying for me.
But then I was like, oh, that wasn't that bad.
And then I did it again and I did it again.
And then quickly that came out of like that came into my comfort zone.
And then I was like, what's the next step?
Like this, I'm first of all, I'm all, I'm only getting nose.
So I actually have to present myself in person.
So then I decide to start getting in person to the businesses.
And I'm like, whoa, I'm standing in front of this like flower shop.
We're about to enter and I'm just standing there contemplating.
Now there's something I didn't tell you.
Just before this, I was sitting in my basement on my spreadsheet of all the local businesses
that I completed just researching the best one.
So I find a flower shop.
And so I'm like, okay, I gotta, I quickly write down their information on my notebook,
pack my backpack, get on my bike.
And I'm like extremely terrified.
And even while I'm sitting at my desk, I'm terrified because I know that this, I know
that I'm going to do this.
And so I go upstairs and I get ready.
And I'm not saying anything.
I am hyper focused in the zone because I don't want to lose focus.
I don't want to fail.
All I care about is actually completing this.
I know that this is the most important thing right now.
So nothing else matters.
I am focused.
And I just remember like walking out the door and my dad's like, where are you going?
And I'm like, it's a flower shop.
And then I leave no information given, no risks.
I am dead focused.
So I hop on my bike and I am biking down.
It's in the middle of summer.
It is hot out and I'm wearing a black shirt and I start sweating.
Cause I'm nervous and it's hot.
So I'm going to be biking down like with my arms out like this so I could try and dry
out my pits.
And I'm like, what?
Biking down.
And I just remember like going down the street just with this like feeling in my, in my like
heart just I'm terrified.
And so I arrive at the flower shop and I walk up to the door and written on the door is
sorry we're closed until next month.
So I am extremely relieved.
I'm like, oh, oh good.
Thank you.
But then another part of me is disappointed.
I'm like, the relief is really high, but then there's this quiet part of me that's like,
ah, this would have been a really good personal growth opportunity.
At this point, I don't really care much if they say yes or no to the actual funnel building.
I just want the personal growth now because I grew so much from not being able to email
someone to now I'm able to cold call someone.
So I remember walking back to my bike and I'm like, contemplating my decisions.
And I actually like turn around and go the opposite direction of my bike just so I could
give myself more time to think.
And I remember sitting at the curb, literally sitting at the curb of the street.
So I'm like sitting down on the edge of the street and cars are driving by right over
my toes, like right next to my toes.
And I am wearing shoes.
So I'm not barefoot, but cars are driving by and I'm just sitting there in deep thought.
I'm like, what should I do?
What should I do?
And thankfully I brought my phone.
Obviously I don't bring my phone to these kinds of things, but I brought my phone and
I pulled up my spreadsheet.
I was like, okay, what's the next best option?
And I found another flower shop.
And it's all the way across town, literally the opposite end of town.
So I'm already sweaty and I have to bike down.
I'm biking down.
Get there.
And I'm just contemplating right in front of the shop.
But I'm not standing still, like I said in the beginning.
I'm walking and I'm like, okay, I don't want to do this.
I don't want to do this, but I'm still doing it.
And then I'm like, I opened the door.
I'm like, I don't want to do this.
I'm scared.
I'm still doing it.
And I walk in and no one's to, like there's no one in sight.
But I hear some, I hear some speaking.
And it's like the kind of flower shop where it's literally a maze to get to the cash register.
And so you have to literally walk all the way to the back.
And then I saw the person.
And I'm sweating, but it's air conditions now.
And I remember being like nervous.
And I was like, okay, this is literally the worst scenario possible because the person
that I'm trying to talk to is dealing with a customer.
So I had to stand there awkwardly with no flowers in my hand.
So I'm not a customer.
And she can tell that too.
I had to stand there awkwardly, wait for it to happen.
And then she finally gets to me and I'm like, can I talk to, and then I say her name.
I didn't know it was her.
Because I looked up on the business LLC search government website, the name of the owner of
the business.
I was like, can I talk to this person?
And that was her.
And she was like, oh, yeah, I'm right here.
I was like, oh, nice.
And we talk.
And then at the end she was like, no, I don't, I'm not really interested.
Or at least that's what I got from it after a couple of weeks of thinking.
Because the real response she gave was, oh, yeah, let me write down your name.
So I got her to write down my name on a sheet of paper.
And then I left.
But she never texted me or emailed me or anything.
So I just assumed she wasn't interested.
That was the scariest part moment of my life up to that point.
Scariest, most courageous moment of my life I've ever been through.
And so I go and I make it my mission to cold approach a business every single day for five
days because I came up with this framework around that time that it takes five days of
doing something uncomfortable every single day for it to get into your comfort zone.
So I was like, OK, I'm going to do this for five days.
And I find some other businesses do the same thing.
The first time I did it at that flower shop, I was 100% scared.
And then the second time, 50%.
And then the third time, 25%.
And it was just easier and easier after that.
But on the fourth day, I was like, OK, well, this is going to get too easy soon.
And I'm kind of addicted to expanding my comfort zone now.
So I want to figure out what's the next step.
And I remember back from a book I read, the four hour work week, comfort zone challenges,
literally just cold approach a girl.
And so I told my friend, let's cold approach a girl.
Like, let's go to the mall and cold approach some girls.
And so we go to the mall.
And on the first day that we do this, we literally are terrified.
This was the scariest moments of our lives up to this point.
10 times scarier.
OK, the cold call was 10 times scarier than the email.
The cold approach to the business was 10 times scarier.
No, yeah, it was 10 times scarier than the cold call.
The cold approach was 100 times scarier than the cold approach at the business.
So we're walking around the mall looking like absolutely terrified boys.
Our faces are like this the whole time.
And we're terrified.
We're seeing all kinds of opportunities to cold approach.
But we're like, no, no, no, no.
Absolute wooses.
And so I'm like, dude, we just got to make a move.
We got to actually take some action.
So we're like, the first female we see, no matter their age, they could be 10 or they
could be 100.
The first person we say, we're just going to say hi.
We're not going to ask for their number.
We're literally just going to say hi.
And my friend wanted to take action first.
So we went into the store and he walked.
And he was like, he was walking around for a little while.
And I was just sitting there at the table waiting for him to do it and report back.
And he came back and he told me, I did it.
And I was like, oh, tell me about it.
And he walked up to this 60-year-old woman and was like, hey, hello.
How are you today?
And she was like, move on, buddy.
Move on.
Move along.
And so that was the first action.
And he didn't die.
He survived.
And so after two more hours of this, we started taking more and more action until eventually
we started to get a groove of things.
And we were just like, OK, we're not leaving until we get a girl's number.
But then after literally like four hours of being at the mall, we're like, OK, we got
to get home soon.
I'm trying to actually eat food, go to bed.
And so I'm like, OK, let's just do five or, OK, we were just going to do like two approaches
each.
And so he does his, I do mine, both nos.
He does his, it's a no.
And then the last approach is all me.
And I'm going, I'm in this store and I'm looking for an opportunity.
And then right as this girl, my age, just made her purchase, she is leaving.
She's literally at the door about to leave.
And I'm just like, excuse me.
And she's like, what do you want?
Oh, and I didn't notice that she said this.
I was so scared.
I was just focused on like my script.
And I was like, how's your day?
And she was like, that's good.
And then she like immediately smiled because she knew what was going on.
And then this never happened.
Like, actually, this similar thing happened to other girls that I talked to that day.
Like they would smile, no one was happening.
And then so then I was like, something happened, like a big noise happened.
And then we both got distracted.
I was like, oh, crazy, right?
Really nervous.
And so I was like, I just wanted to end it, kind of get out of there because I didn't
know what to say.
I was completely stumped.
I was clear in my mind.
Like I didn't know what to say.
And so I was like, can I have your number?
And she's like, sure.
And then I didn't bring my phone.
I left my phone at home because I don't use my phone for things anymore.
So I was like, this is kind of weird, but I don't have my phone.
So can you write it in my journal?
And I pull out my handheld leather notebook journal and a pen.
And I handed it to her and she starts laughing.
And she's like, sure.
And so she wrote her name.
And then she also wrote her number.
And I still have that sheet of paper.
Or I still have that journal.
It's up in the attic, but that was the first time I've ever gotten a girl's number.
And that experience of the progression behind email, cold call, cold approach to the business,
and then cold approach to the girl, that was extreme personal growth.
I did all of that in the course of, I think, two weeks, maybe even one week.
And I grew extreme amounts.
And then we kind of school started, so we only went to the mall like two more times.
So we never actually got to finish the five times of my framework, how it takes five times
to do something every day for five days.
So we never actually got to finish it.
And then it's been like six months since then, and I haven't gone to the mall yet.
But that is another opportunity to expand your comfort zone.
And it's also like, I probably wouldn't have done that.
I wouldn't have worked up the courage to actually drive myself to the mall if I didn't have
my friend.
Being a friend is extremely important for these personal growth endeavors.