Are you losing the very essence of you?
So lately I've been really getting into spirituality and
really getting into
these few books that I really believe are gonna change my life or change my entire
interpretation of life how I see the world and everything. I
believe that they'll shatter my worldview and
they've already started to confirm a lot of my suspicions.
So these books I learned about on a
website called the most beautiful world and on that website there's a reading list.
The ultimate reading list for human beings and I've talked about it so many times on this ep on this podcast. So I'm not gonna go into
depth but pretty much the seven books that I'm reading are
a scent of humanity, die wise, come of age,
Toofty the Priestess,
Journeys out of the body,
the Egypt Code and Dancing After the Music Stops.
And I've started to read them all because there's this reading strategy that I'm using. I'm just trying it out but
where you read seven at once but I
have gotten really into
Dancing After the Music Stops because it's a
it's a very easy read because
there's a lot of pictures and spaces.
So it's pretty quick in that sense
but it's really good and
it's talked a lot about the school system.
It hasn't even talked about it. It just mentions it. Like the author Gene Pascal Rehman.
He just says like there's one quote that I read this morning that really stuck with me because I
really had had a suspicion that the school system was bad. All my life
I knew that it was bad like I didn't care for school and I thought it was a waste of time.
But then just recently I started to get a suspicion that it's actually like really bad for us. Like not just a waste of time
but it's also like
morphing us and it's like
shaping our views on reality to keep us down.
Essentially.
And there's this one quote and I don't remember the quote exactly but I basically have the essence of it.
And in Dancing After Music Stop he says
like F school like screw school. No really screw school.
All school does is turn like school turns gods into drones.
And for some context I'm just starting to learn of
my own essence and I'm just starting to learn that we're actually much more
powerful than we were led to believe in the school system.
And we're we're essentially gods like we are God basically.
And I'm just starting to believe that and I'm my plan is to know it like I'm trying to actually experience that
power on my own.
And I have this whole plan which I'll get into eventually but I
I want to talk about the school system turns the gods into drones.
How terrible of a sentence is that?
It turns gods into drones.
Like it literally turns gods into cogs in the machine.
In pendulum or in transurfing terms.
The school system takes kids who are like little children who are gods.
Like they are powerful creators.
They're humans.
And then it slowly but surely whittles down at that power
and instills a worldview of mindset into the child until eventually once they get to
graduate they're now a cog in the machine and they go on to work a nine to five job.
They go on to be a part of the system.
And then there's some other quotes that stuck with me throughout the course of the
book.
But that one was like the number one and then another one was the slavery.
The slavery money like the money system that's like
enslaving or something like that.
I don't remember the exact quote but it is basically saying that our money system is
like a system of slavery.
And I agree because like you're working in nine to five.
You're working literally eight hours a day for five days a week for 40 years.
Or if you're lucky thirty five but you're not going to get lucky.
You're going to you're going to have to work for a couple of years.
You're going to have to work for a long time.
Like that is that is actually insane.
But I don't want to get into money in this chapter or in this episode because to be honest
actually actually let's get into money.
I want to tell a story.
I am beginning to become indifferent to money because I learned that in Transurfing you
should not focus on the money.
You should focus on the goal and you should always be happy when money comes to you but
never be stressed out if you have to spend money.
And so I've been conscious of my money like mindset a lot.
For example at school yesterday my friend was like are you going to buy this certain thing and it's good for your health.
It was something that was good for your health.
And then I was like I don't know how much is it cost and then I instantly was like why do I care how much it costs.
Like money is not an issue.
And then but today actually I want to tell you that I'm at like less than a hundred dollars in my bank account.
And today like I was in my reading I was studying all morning and I took like a long nap this morning.
And then I got out of my room around like 10 o'clock.
I was in there for like four hours.
Got out at 10 o'clock in the morning.
And then my mom said that I don't have like she tried to take out money out of my account because she gave me cash so she wouldn't take it out of my account.
And then she said but she couldn't because I didn't even have the money in my account because I have less than like I had like 50 bucks in my account.
And so I was like OK I was aware that I had no money.
But I instantly recognized that that was just the pendulum trying to pull my attention and trying to take a jab at me.
So then I instantly went back in my room without even responding.
And then I just started thinking I was like what can I do to get to get out of this situation.
What can I do to get money.
And then literally after maybe one minute of thinking it came to me.
I had I was like where do I have money stashed.
So I was like looking through my drawers where I usually stashed my money.
I found a few bucks gave it to my mom but then I remembered I have a hundred dollars of money in an investment like in the stock market.
And so I instantly went downstairs and looked at my phone and I couldn't remember what the account that what the app was because the way my phone is set up.
I have to search manually to be able to access an app.
So I didn't know what account the app was called.
I didn't know what the app was called.
But then I remembered it was called Fidelity.
So I logged in and I sold all my stocks.
Now today is Saturday so they won't sell until Monday.
But on Monday I'll get like a hundred dollars so then I'll transfer it over to my account.
And then after that I went through all of my subscriptions that I have to like have or the subscriptions that I'm paying for because I have a few subscriptions for podcasting like for my business.
And I wrote them all out so I have a bunch of subscriptions but it's not as much money as I expected.
So I have RSS.com which is $15 a month.
Later.com which is $45 a month and then I have podcast.com or.ai which is $143 per year but I already paid for one year so I don't have to worry about that for a while.
And then I have Zen business stuff which is per year and then GoDaddy which I don't know what it was.
I don't know if they didn't tell me how much it cost but it's it renews in like a few next month I think.
But pretty much I only have to pay $60 a month.
So from all the money in my account right now I have two months worth of money.
So in two months I'll be graduated.
So that basically means that I am set for two months so I have two months to find another $60 to get enough money for a third month.
And then I have to just keep on getting.
Literally I only have to get $60 a month to maintain this.
And so I went through this whole mindset or this whole like thought process where I'm coming very conscious of all the beliefs instilled in me especially when it comes to money where I made a lot of connections.
So first of all I want to tell a story that I've told on this episode before but or not this episode but this show before.
I went to Funnel Hacking Live and on the first day I met a man named Gary and he is a very successful businessman, multimillionaire per year.
And he like I was like so what I asked him like what do you have any tips for me or like do you have any words of wisdom for me.
And what he said was because he had just explained his story.
He had been focusing on entrepreneurship ever since he graduated high school.
And he never stopped.
And his words of wisdom to me was you guys are young.
So take advantage of the fact that you have people taking care of you.
Like you have a family that is like taking care of all of your food that you live at a house.
Like you basically live for free.
You don't have to worry about money.
So just focus on entrepreneurship.
And so I went when I this morning when I was mapping out all of my bills.
I say that because I only have like three subscriptions.
But when I was mapping all of that out, I was real.
I remembered that story about Gary and I remembered that I literally have no I don't have to pay for anything.
Like right now I have all the books that I need for at least a few months.
Maybe even longer because I'll be able to read if I if anything I just reread transfer a bunch of times.
But I have all the books that I need for at least a few months.
And then I've got like food.
I like I've got food shelter.
Everything covered.
My parents pay for everything for me.
So literally all I have to worry about is just existing.
And since but like I don't have to worry about any monetary money things.
And all of the money problems were is all just like a false belief instilled in me by society.
And so I'm conscious of that now and working at chipping that away from my mind.
And one of the things I realized is since I only have to make $60 a month.
Like I I can definitely get that easy because I do get allowance.
So like I get half my age in allowance.
So I get $8 a week.
Which is awesome.
So that's pretty much like $24 a month.
So I really only have to make $40 a month to maintain my bills.
And that's not going to be an issue.
So pretty much I'm straight chilling.
Like all I have to do is just keep going to school.
And that's it.
And that's another thing.
I want to talk about that.
God's to drone is what the school system does.
And I definitely it's this is probably one of the hardest times in my life.
Simply because I'm becoming more aware of the truth.
And I'm learning more and more about how bad school is.
Yet I am still going to school every day.
So that is why it's probably one of the hardest times in my life mentally.
And honestly, things are looking good because I've got this whole plan mapped out to discover my power.
Like I'm not if you were to ask me one year ago what my plans were.
And I was like actually genuine with you.
I probably would have said, well, I want to be in like I want to work on.
I don't even know if I wanted to work on a business a year ago.
I probably would have said like I want to learn how to code or something like that.
Or yeah, I think I wanted to make money online somehow.
And my method was to learn how to code and build websites that can make money.
But one year ago, I was so like I didn't know anything.
Like I didn't even know my path forward.
But now fast forward to today, October 14th is the day of recording this.
I know like I have this whole plan mapped out and I want to get I want to get into it.
So literally all I'm working on right now is just maintain my podcast for the next like 70 days until I graduate or until I finish school.
For the next 70 days, I'm going to just maintain like build my channel, build my social media, just maintain my current schedule.
And I'm going to work on literally just work on developing myself spiritually and mentally.
Let me explain.
So I'm going to work on developing myself through meditation.
I'm going to meditate three days a day, three times a day continuing on because I've been meditating three times a day for the past month.
But I'm going to continue that for the next two months.
And then I'm going to work on in those meditations.
I'm going to work on getting to higher focus levels.
So right now I'm just in the beginning of focus 12.
I'm just I'm in focus 12.
I'm not able to get to focus 12 right now, but I'm not able to perceive things and I'll get into my plan on how to be able to perceive things because I'm learning a lot about this stuff.
And I'll work on my meditations, but then along the way I'm also going to work on just destroying my worldview absolutely obliterating everything that I know.
I'll be doing that through those meditations as well as reading these books, the seven books that I mentioned.
And then I'm also there's a lot of inner work that has to go on as well.
For example, I'm constantly calling myself to wake up constantly.
And there's a lot of things I'm changing inside myself.
Like one thing is I'm trying to build this habit where every single time I see someone I instantly look for something that's notable about them or something that I like something that I admire about them.
Because at times I have been in the past I have judged people like mentally.
I just think I judge them for various things.
And why would I judge them? I'm no better than them.
So I'm building this habit of instantly trying to find one thing that I admire about them.
And it's actually pretty easy if you're conscious about it because there was one day at the gym where I was like looking around and I had this like awe inspiring moment.
Like these were the same people that I go to the gym with like every day.
But there was just this flip in my mindset where I had this awe inspiring moment after literally just looking at everyone in my gym and just finding something notable about them.
I was like, wow, I'm surrounded by a bunch of awesome people like a bunch of cool people.
And like it was a cool thing to experience because my reality was the same but my perception absolutely radically changed in that moment.
So that is another thing that I'm working on but I want to get into the books.
I'm reading these books and these are going to be teaching me.
I've read like almost all of the four words in the introductions of the books.
Some of them are really hard to read, which is good because in one of the four words, I'm pretty sure it was the four word of come of age.
Charles Eisenstein said, don't be quick to try and understand the meaning of this book.
Like allow yourself not to understand the book, at least in the beginning.
And don't be quick to try and add this to your worldview.
Because if you read this book with an open mind, then you'll actually find that your worldview is shattered.
Like that's basically what Charles Eisenstein said in the intro to come of age.
I'm pretty sure it was the four word of come of age.
But pretty much I believe that there's a lot in these books that I've yet to learn.
And I'm going to be honest, like a scent of humanity, come of age, die wise, and the Egypt code so far.
Those four books are like the hardest for me to read because I see them as just big, long books that are hard to read.
Which wouldn't be a problem if I was just reading them individually.
But the fact is that I am reading seven books at once, which is a hit fall to that strategy because I find myself not reading as much of those four books.
And going to the interesting books to me, to me, they're more interesting simply because I've already understood like what they're talking about.
Even though I haven't read it yet, but I have like background knowledge on them.
So I might stop doing the seven book method because it's not like efficient for me.
So that is like what I'm doing with the books.
And that's my plan for the next 70 days.
Literally just lock in and just radically change myself once again because I radically changed myself multiple times in the past year.
Especially over summer break and also even over this school year, the past two months, I've radically changed myself.
So I plan on doing that again and locking in even deeper and more into what is going on.
And I want to talk about spirituality a little bit more.
So there's this book that I'm reading.
It's called, it's not really a book, it's more of like a document.
And it's 150 pages long.
It's called Seven Resident Colors.
I talked about it a little bit in yesterday's episode, but I've read a little bit more of it.
And I talked about this one thing about the invisible college, like the invisible school.
And it's basically where many people, many people, many humans have developed many different abilities, like extra ordinary abilities like telekinesis, ESP.
I don't know what ESP is, but that's what they said.
They're all about viewing, out of body experience, like all of these things, people, there's a group of people who are able to do it, do all those things.
And there's also a group of people who can get into higher levels of awareness or higher levels of consciousness during their meditation.
So during my meditation, I'm able to get to focus 12, which is the state of expanded awareness.
It's like the first state of expanded awareness.
And there is 49 focus levels, as described by Miranin.
Now, there are thousands of focus levels, but for the purposes of humans, there's 49 focus levels.
And I'm on focus 12.
Like that's what I've been able to achieve so far.
And there is a group, there's a community, essentially, of humans that are able to sense, or there's a community of people who are able to achieve these high levels of awareness.
And they're extremely high on the consciousness spectrum.
And they're also able to sense out the energy of other people like them in the earth.
And they're able to reach out to them and congregate, essentially.
And so they're also able to reach out to people who are, let's say there's someone on focus 35.
I don't know if this is actually how it works, but I'm just giving an example of my understanding so far.
Let's say there's someone on focus 35, pretty advanced, and they decide they want to train someone.
So they seek out someone who's on focus 27, and they seek them out, and then they basically like mentor them.
And then that focus 27 now has a person to guide them and like help them through their journey.
And so, essentially, there's a group of people congregated that like basically has a, it's just basically like a school of people who are in those higher levels of focus, conscious awareness.
And the minimum entry requirement to get into the school is to be able to get into focus 27, which focus 27 is an extremely expanded state of awareness.
It's like the realm of souls and like death or something like that.
I don't, like it's where souls go after they die or something like that. I don't really know for like, I don't really know much about it, but it's like a super high advanced focus level.
And I do have a little background knowledge on kind of what it takes to get to it.
So there's this woman who I read her post about a little while back, and she was, she's a Buddhist and she's been meditating consistently for like 15 years.
And then she started the gateway tapes. And then she was able to get to focus 27 within a few months.
I don't remember the exact timeframe, but it's probably like less than five months of starting the tapes.
Now she had a massive baseline, like she had an extremely strong foundation of meditating for 15 years.
So essentially she was able to get to focus 27 in 15 years of experience.
Now she didn't meditate with the gateway tapes until 15 years into her journey.
And then once she actually used the tapes, she was able to radically increase her speed of progress.
And I, and she actually had her husband do it as well.
And her husband spent like multiple months just on focus 10.
So, and her husband didn't have any experience meditating.
So for me, I feel as though I could probably get to focus 27 within like two years.
So that's kind of my long term goal with spirituality, achieve focus 27 and enter that school and be in contact with these entity or like these energetic beings.
And just learn all about this extra like world that we're a part of that no one knows.
And there's this one thing that I read about as well in the gateway experience, or not to give it seven resident colors booklet.
They said that spirits are able to like travel across these focus levels.
But humans are much more like their word is explorer, which an explorer is basically a human person who is meditating and exploring through the awareness levels, focus levels.
And so humans are actually explorers are much more capable of like higher levels of focus because they have the experience of physical reality.
So essentially, we have advantage over souls and spirits like spirits are able to travel through like these dimensions at will and they do multiple like all the time.
And we are able to as well and we actually have an advantage over them.
However, our like there was they basically said we're only held back by our own limits by our limitations we place upon ourselves, which goes along with Transurfing because you get exactly what you choose and your like lot in life is only limited by your own limitations you place upon yourself.
So that's another thing like that goes back to the school system turns gods into drones.
It teaches you to instill limitations upon yourself.
So basically places a worldview inside of you to literally just suppress your power so much through your internal beliefs.
And so that's why I really think that like that's why in my meditation today I asked myself like asked my higher self, what are my limitations that I'm like, how am I holding myself back through my own limitations.
And I'm really like trying to figure out what what my limitations are and being conscious of that because I'm capable of achieving focus 49 right now the second.
But I have limitations and my limitations are so powerful that I'm barely even able to get focus 12.
Now I am unsure if I would be able to actually perceive focus 49, or if I would even be able to get there because there is something every seven focus levels you kind of transcend and it's called it's like the circle.
And it's like all encompassing so I'm not actually sure if I'd able to get focus 49 right now even if I had like no limiting beliefs.
I'm not sure how it works because I also learned that there is like a barrier of entry between every seven focus levels.
Once you get to focus seven focus 14 focus 21 28 and onwards every seven all the way up to 49. There's a barrier that you have to go through to be able to reach the next level.
So, and that prevents and that's placed so it prevents you from de evolving like going back and like going lower conscious consciousness.
And so I, where am I going with this.
Like we're only limited by our intent or like intention and the limitations we place upon ourself.
And there's a another thing.
So basically, we have a higher self, which is basically like we have access to it all the time through like intuition and stuff.
And then especially once you get to focus 12, you're able you're in the expanded awareness. So you're able to cast out questions to your higher self and receive them back with a like a larger awareness or like a larger view of what's the word.
You're able to receive answers back in the context of the larger scheme of things.
And so we have a higher self and I was realizing like I read that our higher self is basically trying to is is also in a search for us.
So we're us we're in a search for our higher self. And at the same time our higher self isn't a search for us.
Like we're both trying to get to each other until eventually we can like become one, I think, or evolve together.
Like we have to we have to be with each other to build evolve each other with like we have to reach each other to build evolve together.
Like my higher self can't evolve unless he reaches unless I reach me or my higher self reaches me and the higher self.
And then once once we like reach each other and we like merge or something like that, we realize that we were always one.
Like it's just I don't really know how it works.
But essentially we have a higher self that's trying to get to us and it can't evolve unless it reaches us and we have to reach it so we can evolve.
So I'm basically in my once I reach focus 12, like I basically talk I try and like talk to it and send message to it.
Like say I'm coming I'm on my way. And I also say when I when I just left focus 12 today, I said, I'll be back soon.
And I'm just trying to get closer and closer with my higher self so I can actually evolve.
And there's another thing I want to talk about all all around me I see people wasting time, like people living a miserable existence part of the system.
And especially now that I'm reading Dancing After The Music stops and all these other books, I'm becoming even more conscious of it.
Where people are just kind of living a fake life and they're kind of living a miserable existence like waking up going on their phone, going to work, coming home, going on their phone, going to bed.
They literally just not doing anything with their lives.
And I'm becoming even more and more conscious of it. It's around me all the time.
And today I actually was so downed by it. I was like, is this really what I like kept on like asking myself. I kept on saying in my head like imagining myself, like going into an outrage and yelling at the person and saying,
is this really how you want to live your life and like getting really pissed off. And so it's really gotten to me today. But then I was like, I am super conscious of the fact that I shouldn't be investing my thought energy on it.
And so I'm conscious of that. And I'm actually, I actually created this affirmation, another affirmation today where I look at myself in the mirror and I say, you're, you're destined for more.
You are getting more, you are great. You're destined for greatness. And like that, you are destined for greatness like that.
I look at myself in the mirror and get hype like that. And I like did that just like, I did it.
The first time I did, I wasn't even thinking about doing I just looked at myself in the mirror after being mad about like looking at someone wasting their life.
I looked at myself in the mirror and just, it just came out naturally. I just reminded myself that I'm, I'm headed for more like I'm headed to greatness.
Like, and I'm on my way to greatness and I'm on my way to an amazing successful life.
And so now I'm going to be conscious of that every time I see, every time I realize that other people's like life choices get to me, I always have to remind myself and look at myself in the mirror and do that affirmation.
And the second I finished that affirmation, I was instantly like made a connection to Funalacking Live. And at Funalacking Live, there was two types of speakers, a kind of content educational speaker who was just teaching like strategies and tactics.
And then there was a inspirational motivational speaker who was just teaching or just up there for inspiration and motivation.
And I was after I did that, I was like, Oh, wow, I actually have to be my own motivational speaker. Like after I did that affirmation in the mirror just naturally, I just was like, Oh, I have to be my own inspirational speaker.
That's the epiphany I came to today.
So basically, I have to just keep pushing forward on improve like getting maxed out on my spirituality. And I really believe that are actually let me let me tell another thing.
Basically, I want to talk about the soul and the spirit more. We were placed like we were souls of what I've come to understand so far is that we were souls for all time.
And then we were like placed into a physical body where we started to live a life. And essentially, what I've come to understand is the soul is like longing to experience life.
And so you have two options throughout your life, you can either kind of allow life to pass you by and experience it like that, or you can be intentional about actually being your own creator and being the creator of your own life.
And you can be intentional and try and create your life as as powerful as possible because you were your soul was placed into this life. So you and you are your soul.
What I've the new perspective that I kind of see is we are all we were all souls. So we're like like souls and then we were placed into a body. And then in this body, we'd made our own decisions. And depending on like our brains were like clean sheets.
So they were like blank. And then our brains, which are not our soul, like our brain was depending on where we were placed on this earth, like let's say we were placed in the American school system, then our brains were basically created into a cog in the machine.
Like we were our worldviews were destroyed, or at least obliterated down to the point where we think we're only destined to work a nine to five for 40 years.
And so essentially our soul is like, like we don't even it's gotten our brains, our minds have buried our souls so much that we don't even remember our dreams.
We don't even we're not even conscious of our dreams because when we're dreaming, it's our soul's opportunity to actually float freely along and actually take control of life.
But we're not even like we're so far separated from our souls that we don't even remember our dreams much less able to control them.
Like think about that. We're so separated from our souls that the time that our souls get to take the like get to actually be in their playground.
We're we don't even know that. And we are our souls.
So that's like so saddening. But it's also inspiring because if we've lived like this, we can actually if we've gotten to this point, we can actually reverse it and get back to to living better.
And what I've noticed is that I haven't really done much to kind of improve this. But lately I've been having a lot better dream recall.
Like I'm able to remember my dreams a lot more lately. And I'm actually what I have been trying to do since I started reading Toofty the Priestess, I have been trying to like break down the false beliefs that I believe that dreams are not real
and replace it with the belief that dreams are actually real. They're just as real as physical reality.
And also it's gotten to the point where a few days ago I actually kind of had a partial lucid dream. Now let me explain.
It was very interesting because I remembered like the whole dream. So basically I for context, I have never played football, like American football in my life, like for real with tackling and all that.
But I wanted to try it out last summer going into summer going into senior year. So literally like three months ago, I wanted to try it out.
So I joined the football team at my school for summer camp. And my plan was actually to be on the team during the school year and play football during the school year.
But so I played football and I ended up not really liking it. And so well actually I liked it, but I realized that I had other plans.
Like I wanted to work on business and I wanted to work on self improvement. And I realized if I did football, then I'd have no time in my day.
So what I did was I finished the season or the camp and then I just didn't join the football team for the season during the school year.
And that was a very good decision because I remember on the last and I actually was recording my podcast at this time.
So if you go back, you'll probably be able to hear my comments about the season.
And I remember being so miserable towards the end because I know that I was wasting a lot of time where I could have spent reading books.
And so with that context, I had a dream the other day where I like somehow my dad managed to convince me to join the football team.
And so I did for some reason. I don't really remember why, but I just did.
And then I was like in the locker room getting all my gear on where I was like pissed off and I got really mad.
And then my friend was like, what's up? And I was like, do you ever get so angry because you did something and then you reversed it and then you did it again?
And he was like, no, but I can see where you're coming from.
And then I was like, yeah, this is me right now. And he's like, well, try and reverse it. And I was like, but I already reversed it.
And the reason why I said that is because I was trying to hide from him the fact that I didn't want to be at football camp or football.
But I was like, but the real thing was that I had quit football.
Like I joined football and then I quit and then I joined it back so I can't just quit again, you know?
And this is all my dream. So then after that, we got ready to like we kind of the scene teleported to on top of the stadium.
And this was not like, it was probably like in a way stadium because I'd never been to the stadium before.
And so there was like this stadium where we were all sitting on top of this flat area on the top.
And we were like the whole team was sitting and then I was like sitting, I was like, why?
Like because our whole team was down there practicing on the field, but half the team was up here sitting on the stadium.
And so I was like, why are we slacking off? And then I decided not to slack off anymore.
So then I started to walk down the bleachers and then I tried to like jump the bleachers further and like slide down them.
And then I ended up like, I was like, oh, I'll just fly down. So I for then I just flew down the bleachers and I flew down to the field.
And then once I got down, I was like, oh, wow, I'm I'm flying like I'm dreaming.
So then I had an instant realization that I was dreaming.
So at this moment, I'm at the bottom. I'm at the football field on the football field and I realized that I'm dreaming.
And now I'm conscious. And let me give some more context.
For context lately, I have towards my REM sleep stage of the night, I tend to wake up a lot towards the end of dreams.
I don't know why and I'm trying to fix the problem, but I lately I've been like waking up a lot and my dreaming has been kind of shallow.
So going back into the dream, I flew down and landed on the field and I instantly had this realization that I was dreaming.
So I got really excited. And then I kind of I was like, OK, so I got super excited.
And I don't really remember like the specifics of what happened next.
But all I remember was trying to change the scene radically to my goal.
I kind of remember hearing like this beach Hawaiian music.
And then I saw like my entire screen like that I was looking at like my entire viewpoint was very blurry.
So I heard the music and I kind of heard like the wind and the waves crashing.
But like the visual, the image was not very strong.
Like I could kind of make out a resemblance of a palm tree and that's about it.
Other than that, everything was like black and even the palm tree was black.
No, OK, so the palm tree was black, but everything else was kind of like blackish blue.
And so I realized that because for more context, sorry, I give too much context in the middle of the story.
I for context, whenever during these times when I'm like waking up in the middle of the night after the dream,
I realized that it's another opportunity to go straight into a lucid like go straight into a dream.
So I try and like fall asleep and try and evoke a dream like go into a dream consciously.
And so during when that happens, you get into a dream and it's like really weak.
Like the dream is very weak.
And so you have to kind of like sit it out and hope for the best that it like stabilizes.
If not, like any sudden movement that you make with your body, the dream ends instantly.
So you have to be very careful about it.
And so when I was in that stage of radically shifting the dream to my goal, which is in Hawaii,
I realized that I was in the stage of like my dream was very weak and any sudden movement, I like wake up.
And so I realized that and then I don't remember what happened next, but essentially I was like woke up and I teleported.
So after trying to change my dream, I instantly woke up in a tent.
So I woke up, but now I'm in a dream again and I thought that I was in real life.
So I woke up, but I was in a dream.
I woke up in a dream essentially.
And now I'm asleep again.
I'm consciously asleep.
And so I'm dreaming again.
I woke up in the tent and then I got out of the tent and I like had my football pads on, but I didn't really notice.
And then I walked straight to the bathroom, which I want to create this image for you.
I was in this tent, which was like right over here.
And then I would the tent was like right next to a football field.
And then there was like along the football field was like stands and like a players bench for the team.
And then right behind that was another or was like this big kind of portable blow up bathroom with like a bunch of urinals in it.
Which was really weird.
It was like a bouncy house, like a blow up inflatable bathroom.
So I walked in there and went to the bathroom instantly.
It must have just been a habit to instantly go to the bathroom right when I wake up.
But I went in there and then one of my football coaches came into the bathroom also and like asked me what's up.
Like, or you know, he asked me like why did I go to bed or something like that?
Because apparently I or no, no, no, no, no, he asked me why did I keep running with the ball?
And then I responded.
I was like, I realized that I had no idea what he was talking about.
But I instantly inferred that I was just in a football game.
So then I was like, I told him like, Oh, to be honest, I have no idea.
I have no recollection of what happened.
All I remember is that I was dreaming and then I realized that I was in a lucid dream.
So I literally explained to my coach in a dream that in that same dream, I was lucid just a few moments before.
And then I told him that I was dreaming and then I was lucid.
But then I was so excited that I just woke up.
And so I woke up in the tent right over there.
And then I just went straight to the bathroom.
So that like, that was such a weird kind of dream looking back on it because so many different things happened.
And then he told me like, I don't remember what happened after that, but that's basically like my whole dream.
So I was, I was, I became lucid in a dream and then I was so excited.
I fell back asleep in the same dream.
And then I told someone in the dream that I was just lucid in that dream while I was asleep.
So it's like, I'm, I'm trying to get more conscious and more lucid during dreams.
And I actually, this is the first, I actually wrote a lot of notes for this episode.
And there's only like seven minutes left on this episode, but I just realized that I, this is the first time where,
first of all, it's the first time where I actually wrote the most notes, but it's also the first time where I've gotten so far and I haven't even finished all my notes.
Usually I get like 30 minutes into the episode and I have no notes left.
So I have to wing it for the rest.
But now I'm able to talk about the rest of my notes.
So I want to talk about, okay, I only have like three things left, which all go together.
So I want to talk about my focus 12 experience.
As you guys know, I am just like, I've been meditating for one month using the gateway experience and that whole month was just focused on getting to focus 10.
And now just recently for maybe like less than a week, I've been focused on getting into focus 12.
So I am at focus 12, but as I read in the seven, as I learned in the seven resident colors booklet,
once you get to a new focus level and you're in it's like outside of your ability, you're there, but you're not able to perceive it because you haven't built up like the senses,
like basically the virtual senses to build experience and perceive what is going on.
So essentially my focus 12 is basically just a dark void and I'm able to visualize better in that like in that thing,
but I'm not really able to perceive much in the focus 12.
So what I learned is that if you you basically have to develop or so you basically have to get into focus 12 multiple times to build us like solidify your perceptions
and be able to actually solidify your stance or your presence in there.
So then you'll actually be able to perceive it.
So essentially the first point is that I learned that simple practice like just doing it every day multiple times a day and just practicing and just being there will already set me on the path to being successful with focus 12.
But another thing I learned is they said that you should actually try and consciously develop your senses like your five senses in basically develop your virtual senses in the meditation.
Like try and try and visualize with all the senses like before I was just visualizing with vision,
but now I'm trying to add in visualizing with feeling and hearing and seeing and smelling and tasting,
which I'll be honest, I had no what like I'm not able to visualize much less visualize senses.
And so that was a very difficult thing. It probably took me like the whole time just to get an instant moment of a sense.
But I know that I'm able to do it with practice.
So right now I'm just beginning trying to develop my virtual senses and I'm not able I'm not like I'm not able to do it.
I'm going to be honest, but after a few weeks or months of practice, I'll be able to do it.
And there's another thing. They're in the seven resident colors.
They were talking about getting a guide and getting someone to guide you.
So they said what you can do is visualize yourself in a cafe or a coffee shop.
And then like with two seats, one person sitting in front of you or sitting like an empty seat in front of you.
And then like the guide will appear eventually.
And I didn't really read that much of that of that sentence.
But basically I read the coffee shop and then I went into my meditation to just try it out.
And what I realized is or what I did was I visualize myself in a coffee shop with a table and one empty chair in front of me and me sitting in my empty chair.
And then just to the right of me is a fireplace.
And then I had a cup of coffee right in front of me, which I don't drink coffee.
I think I've only tasted coffee once in my life.
But for the purposes of practicing my senses, that was like the perfect environment.
Because I was able to practice my vision through visualizing that coffee shop.
And then I was able to practice my hearing through.
At first I tried to visualize a constant like chatter.
Like imagine sitting in a coffee shop where people are talking like that kind of background commotion.
But then I realized like I don't want that.
So then I just visualize like I had a quiet room, but I visualized the sounds made by the fire crackling.
So that was cool.
I'm not really able to my again my senses are not strong in the focus of but I visualize my sound through that.
And then I smelled like the aroma of the coffee because there's like there's a there's always this like distinct scent in a coffee shop.
And I tried to smell that and then for feel I tried to feel like the glossy smooth wood of the kind of table.
And I also felt my the hot warm coffee cup and held it.
And then I tried to taste the coffee.
I'm not even able to taste the coffee, but like that's pretty much what I was trying to do.
And I found that I realized that doing that and practicing my senses will actually strengthen my like solidify my position and strengthen my position inside of focus wealth.
So it'll help me move faster along my journey.
And so that's basically like what I'm doing.
But that's just a small part of like that was just maybe a few minutes of visualization.
But what I've done now is during my visual while visualizing my goal and now I incorporate a lot of feelings and senses into it now.
And I actually go through a routine because another thing that I'd learned is to strengthen your position in focus 12 even more.
You visualize yourself doing things that you do in real life.
And so I figured that if I do that in focus 12 as well as inside of my goal like inside of my slide while I'm visualizing something, it'll strengthen both my focus 12 as well as my slide for my goal.
So it'll be a double whammy.
And I basically just visualize myself doing my whole daily routine that I would do at home.
But it would take place in the at my goal in Hawaii, which I've modified it slightly because I'll have more resources.
For example, instead of a cold shower, I take a 15 minute ice bath.
And instead of meditating in my room at home, I meditate outside on the beach in the sun on the sand.
So that's pretty much like what I what I'm doing in my meditations.
I hope you guys enjoyed this episode.
So to wrap things up, actually, before I end off real quick, I want to tell I want to admit that there are many times where I find that it's very difficult to create one hour of content every single day.
And like have it all unique because that basically gets me to the point where I have to learn at least one hour of new stuff, which I know that I'm I'm definitely learning one hour of new stuff.
But the hard part is remembering all of that stuff and writing it down, which is why I'm very glad that I was in the zone while I was writing my notes for this episode.
But to wrap things up, don't forget to download your favorite episodes and subscribe to the Ascend Momentum show.
But before you guys leave, make sure to look up at the sky.