What's going on, Pursuers? Welcome to The Pursuit
of Calling, the podcast that provides you with
the strategies and tools needed to successfully
discover and pursue your calling. Whether it's
through inspiring stories, thought -provoking
interviews, or quick, insightful episodes on
personal growth and development, we've got you
covered. I'm your host, Thomas Carney. Enjoy
the episode. All right, Paul, welcome to the
show. Thank you for having me. Yeah, for sure.
For those of you who don't know who Paul Emery
is, everyone gets an intro. I just want to have
a few things I just want to say real quick. I
met Paul at IMC, where many of my previous guests
have come from. But the big difference is that
him and I stayed in contact. Through the excitement
after IMC back in March, to us coaching each
other to the loss of his son and to him now teaching
me his personal values and success framework
called EcoPAC. Or he told me that that stands
for Emory for the Kingdom of Heaven, PAC. And
I'm super excited to have this conversation with
him and to share with you because Paul has become,
over the last six months, has become a pretty
dear friend. And we've helped each other grow
a lot in these last few months. So I'm excited
to share some of his insights with you. Well,
I'm glad to be with you, Thomas, as always. For
sure. And I haven't done this in a while, and
I kind of felt convicted by God to do this again.
I used to, every episode with guests, at least
once I knew, I would do exaltations. And I have
not done them in a while. And so I figured this
would be a great opportunity to be able to do
this again. So I intrude to you guys to how I
met him, but I want to talk to you about who
he is. So Paul has a faith in God that I truly
strive to have. He has this perseverance in achieving
his goals and with pushing me to want to do the
same. One thing that I really like to think about,
I mentioned the 21 irrefutable laws of leadership
on this podcast before, and law 11 is the law
of the inner circle. And I'm really happy to
have Paul in my inner circle because, like I
said, not just because of his faith and perseverance,
but I think those tied in with, I mentioned before,
the loss of his son, and I got to see how he
handled that and how his faith. held true and
strong and, uh, to that. And because he knows
the truth that inspired me to really lean into
my faith more. So this, I'm just trying to set
you guys up for this episode. Cause I know it's
going to be good. And so let me make sure I said
all the exaltations. Uh, but yeah, I think that's
everything I want to say. I want to say again,
I'm happy to have, uh, happy to have you here,
Paul. And. Let's dive in. Who would you say,
now that I have been true to you, who would you
say Paul Emery is? Well, I am currently an aspiring
coach. I've, as you mentioned, been with John
Maxwell and certified through the IMC conference
last March. So that was my entrance into the
community. And it was just a few short weeks
after that conference, specifically on April
21st, I lost contact with my 21 -year -old son,
Nolan. He was living in Nashville. And it wasn't
uncommon not to hear from Nolan for a few days.
But as time progressed, a few days later, I was
speaking to his sister. on the phone and she
had not heard from him either so we ended up
discovering that he had passed away due to an
epileptic seizure and we're not exactly sure
what day that happened but uh that period of
time each month since has been difficult and
coming up on the conference just this past month
in august i had friends reach out to me and suggest
that i attend the conference and at first i decided
no it's too early i need space and time. But
as that conference drew closer, I felt convicted
in my heart that I should pursue that and really
seek the traction that I came out of the March
conference with in living as a person of value
who could add value to other people. And I can't
tell you how excited I was in March to emerge
as a certified coach with John Maxwell. In fact,
I came out of the conference Checked into a hotel,
bought some dry erase markers and drool over
the windows with what has become since then Echo
Pack. And I'm excited to share that with you
today. Glad to answer any questions that you
might have regarding that. But I am currently
residing in Alabama. I live in southern Alabama
in a town called Opp, spelled O -P -P. And we're
about a half hour north of the Panhandle line.
I am the oldest of four boys. in my fifties now.
And I am a full -time worker who is learning
to coach in the rest of my day. So any of you
out there that are. by vocationally looking at
coaching as a viable means, that's me too. I'm
right there with you. I know what it's like to
try and squeak a few extra hours out of the day,
either to read or to engage with some actual
platform or to engage in a wonderful opportunity
like this to be with you here today. I do have
ambitions of becoming a full -time coach someday.
Very interested in that. I am a member of the
mentorship community with John Maxwell as well.
And I am still going through my certification
as a disc trainer. I bought into that level of
the training tool with disc and really enjoy
psychometric tool and evaluation of people's.
personalities as a way to connect to them i am
a very strong connector and that's what motivated
me to get engaged with john maxwell in the first
place i saw an opportunity to satisfy my natural
enjoyment of connecting with people through being
a person of value who values people and can add
value to them so in a nutshell uh that's about
who i am and uh really i am just want to echo
Thomas's comments right back to him, it was very
meaningful. He and I sat together for a meal
at the IMC in March, and then we sat together
near each other through the last day there and
just connected in such an extraordinary way,
exchanged information. This has developed into
a wonderful friendship, so I appreciate you too,
brother. Yeah, for sure. No, it was... It is
crazy how that happened because we both met a
lot of people and I'm not, and yeah, we just
so happened to sit next to each other and I asked
you for your notes. You had like 10 pages of
notes. Uh, but yeah, it was, uh, definitely,
I'm definitely happy that we got, uh, got that
chance to meet and see in contact. Uh, but you
mentioned echo pack and I'm sorry that I, uh,
introed it wrong. Oh, no, you're fine. Just fine.
Um, But why don't you tell people about what
Echo Pack is? Well, Echo Pack is all about six
months from now, who you want to become. We all
cast forward something into this universe and
it echoes back in different ways. But I like
to ask people 4 ,380 hours from now, you know,
six months from this moment, where will you be?
With attitudes you're protecting, with the relationships
you're investing in, with habits that you're
forming, with the person who you are, people
are watching us as people of influence. And all
of us, I believe, underestimate our influence
on the world because there are people who love
us. There are people who are watching us. There
are people who are inspired by us, either for
the good or for the bad. So to ask ourselves,
where would I want to be? How am I inspiring
those who are watching me? How am I living as
a person of faith, a person of value? John rightly
says that most people allow their lives to simply
happen to them. And that's not you, Thomas. That's
not me. That's not what we do in the Maxwell
community. We're all about being people of value
who add value to others. And as you mentioned,
Emery is a material that's used for polishing,
shaping, and smoothing other surfaces. And I
really love that. True to my last name, I have
had an opportunity to be abrasive in the manufacturing
world as a Six Sigma black belt and a change
manager, managing projects. And that is often
an abrasive element in an organization. But it's
all about smoothing and shaping and polishing
where it's needed. Emory, as you mentioned, for
the kingdom of heaven, I want to, through coaching,
shape, polish, and smooth courage into character
by helping other people recognize their potential
and invest in legacy. So the way I like to explain
Echo Pack is you'll engage in four basic journeys.
The first would be to know yourself in order
to lead yourself, and that has been coined by
several organizations. But it's all about identifying
those values, those things that really resonate
with who we are and what motivates us into activity.
Then leading ourselves in order to lead other
people. We can't give away what we don't have,
right? John emphasizes that in his materials.
And if we are going to lead other people, that
gives us this third journey into reaching our
potential because that's what we're trying to
become. People of value who add value to people.
And reaching potential. Why? So we can invest
a legacy. And all of us are going to leave a
legacy of life lived. How? Well, the end of that
sentence is up to every one of us. And that's
what I love about Echo Pack is Echo Pack members
have the opportunity to very clearly understand
how 50 % of their available time is moored and
anchored to a trajectory that will satisfy. a
stretch vision statement for their lives six
months from now. And the idea is that we work
together to understand your values. We understand
your, we shape a mission statement for you. Some
people have a mission statement. I'm surprised
to find that many do not have a mission statement.
And if they do, it's not always directly connected
to the value system that's motivating them. So
knowing ourselves to lead ourselves, leading
ourselves to lead others. satisfying that vision
statement for six months, investing our legacy,
and then enjoying a cadence of coaching along
the way. I love coaching because I love connecting.
And it's just a complete reward for me. So far,
I've been doing it with folks who have been willing,
like yourself, to help me evaluate that process
and how it goes by practicing, in essence. But
I'm hoping in the near future to be able to monetize
that into something that will really add value
to people who take advantage of it. You know,
John says that success is not a destination.
It's a daily. Right. And Echo Pack members have
the opportunity to know how to daily connect
their experience to the trajectory of where they
have decided ahead of time they want to be six
months from today. the additives on a calendar
things that stack up in a daily format however
you live your life with scheduling and planning
so that if you run into an available half hour
or you've got an available 20 minutes it's very
easy and very reflexive to participate in these
activities that we've determined ahead of time
that connect very strongly to your values and
we also operate on the premise of 70 -30, that
if 70 % of what your life is about and you are
engaging in is highly connected to your values
and highly connected to your leadership, you
can survive the other 30 % that may not be, but
it's not going to run you into a deficit of energy,
motivation, attitude. You'll be able to find
meaningful connection to your values and your
leadership every single day. That's what Echo
Pack is really about. Well, thank you for that.
Thanks for asking. For sure. I want to go back
to something you said. You said about the mission
statement where people don't always have that
connected with their values. And you say that,
and if someone has a mission statement, maybe
they don't know that's what it is. and that and
like um because i think our if a mission statement
isn't connected to your values it's because it
wasn't in my mind it's because it wasn't uh influenced
by your values it's influenced by uh the world
it's influenced by like the people people around
you more than what's uh inside and i think there's
some nuance to that i think of course your values
grow from uh where like a what is called your
maps of meaning that's something that like jordan
peterson talks about and yeah like what your
like how you how do you how you see the world
it's really and but if you always let your values
like um if you always let your values or values
or your missions be based off what other people
believe then how are you ever going to know what
you believe how you're ever going to know what
what you have value in it's like um growing in
my relationship with Christ, it was exactly like
that. It's like, am I going to have my parents'
faith and rely on their faith, or am I going
to grow my own relationship with Christ? That's
right. So it's like whenever you have a mission
statement, you look into yourself, and if you
don't have one, and if you have one that's not
based on your values, I think first you have
to figure out what your values are. Well, you're
right. You're right. But yeah, it's like figure
out your values and based on your values, figure
out your mission statement. And the mission statement,
it's 100 % yours. It's unique to you. It's not
anybody else's. That's right. So, and that's
really what's going to help, like what you were
saying, Paul, like that's really what's going
to help drive everything that you do. Oh, it's
incredible. And it's as unique to you as your
DNA is. There's something that I think is amazing.
One of the proofs of God, in my opinion, this
is a wonderful proof that God exists, is that
in the span of all of history, even within the
8 .5 billion people on the planet today, God
has never lacked the creativity sufficient to
need to reuse the mold that he used to make Thomas
Carney. He's never had to reuse the mold he used
to make. Paul Emery. We may look like our parents.
We may have some similarities of features with
them as their offspring, but our impact on the
world, we are designed. to make a unique impact
on the world as unique as the experiences we
have experienced. And that's something that came
out of this last conference. I was really blessed.
You mentioned 10 pages of notes from the first
IMC. Second IMC, I emerged with 38 pages of notes,
and I'm still unpacking them. So just a plug
there. If you ever think that going to the conference
again may not hold anything new for you, please.
Do not believe that. Give it a chance and find
out what a treasure it can be. But there is no
question that you are designed to make a unique
impact on the world. And there is a group of
people who are only going to hear your voice.
God wants to use you as salt and light in a unique
way. And I completely agree with you, making
sure that you take the time. Three one -hour
sessions in Echo Pack, more if needed, but it's
three at a minimum. The first hour is spent just
unpacking what your individual values are. And
it's not just a matter of what do you think is
important. It's really a matter of creating a
model that says, what would the root system of
your value tree be? What would the supporting
structure of your value tree become? the leaves
what are the things that photosynthesize why
are you exchanging energy with the world around
you to create and give back to the environment
those exchanging elements of values are also
very powerful and we keep on referring back to
those as we move through that mission statement
and then deriving the vision statement to get
very specific about the old the old acronym smart
specific measurable attainable realistic and
time bound Your vision statement should be a
SMART goal that's measurable and verifiable.
Can you say that SMART goal again, but say it
slower just in case somebody missed it? Oh, absolutely.
SMART stands for specific, measurable, attainable,
realistic, and time -bound. And all of those
are extremely important to know that you're successful
in achieving what you want to do. This is also,
you mentioned the word pack at the end of echo,
E -K -O -H -P -A -C -K. The pack is really all
about a community of people that come around
you because we are in synergy more than just
the sum of our parts. One plus one equals three,
maybe five, maybe seven. But I know in our exchange.
Thomas, with our friendship and our coaching
sessions that have followed the conference, we
have gotten more from each other than just the
additive of our parts. We experience more. We
push ourselves further in community. And so this
is all about living in community to reach your
potential. That is really my mission in life.
I love the two greatest commandments that Jesus
gave, love the Lord your God, soul, heart, mind,
and spirit, all of it. Also love your neighbor
as yourself. Well, learning to love yourself
well is extremely important. But then in the
context of all of that, living as somebody who
inspires other people to do the same way, I am
all about connecting in order to help people
reach their potential. It really excites me.
Wow. I appreciate the chance to talk about it.
I love to talk. I talk for a living. I could
talk all day long, but I don't want to overextend.
No, you're perfectly fine. I'm kind of itching
because part of me wants to see 38 notes and
part of me doesn't know if I have time to go
through 38 pages of notes. But I definitely want
to talk to you about that sometime. We've been
plugging Maxwell a lot. If you've been thinking
about taking the employing, don't even know what
we're talking about. Just search Maxwell Leadership.
Look up IMC and just go see it for yourself.
It's not paid advertisement. The next question
I want to ask, though, is this podcast is called
The Pursuit of Calling. And essentially, it's
like what you're doing is helping people discover
their mission statement, which I believe is like
a verbal representation of what the calling is.
And I think what you already said, you already
kind of answered the question I was going to
ask. What would you say your calling is was the
question. But you already said it's to shape,
polish, and smooth others. Yeah. It's to help
others see. Not just who they could be, but also
help them get there. Well, absolutely. And it
begins, obviously, I take the same journey as
everybody. Know myself to lead myself. I'm right
there. John Maxwell says it over and over again,
the hardest person to lead is yourself. And I
am still working on that. But in the context
of doing that, it's a wonderful opportunity then
to find out that other people get inspired. by
that and they get inspired to follow and they
want that same experience so yeah i am very much
wired for living as an example that would be
worthy of following and then not only that but
having the time taking the time connecting in
a way that helps other people reach their potential
That's what really gets me out of bed in the
morning. And I have found a unique calling, even
my professional life. I've worked in industry
for over 30 years. And in the context of that,
it's often been surrounding projects that were
seemingly impossible or things that we had never
done before, optimizing systems. But it always
boils down to, and I will tell people, we are
primarily in my job. salespeople and psychologists,
because it's mostly people. People are the most
valuable part of what we do. And without people,
things don't improve. They don't work. They won't
reach their potential. So professionally, I've
been doing this for a while. I really enjoy watching
light bulbs turn on. I really enjoy seeing people
motivated for something more than trading time
for money in the professional context. And now
moving into coaching. I very much look forward
to connecting with people, helping the light
bulbs turn on through the ALA model. I've taken
that coaching. I'm going to be engaging more
with the speaker platform. That's yet to come
for me. But a lot of it is you had referenced
the death of my son. And a big piece of where
I am today is because of. how that has affected
and transformed my life. I have had to find the
grit to get back up and decide that the Lord
may have taken my son home, but I'm still here.
I still have a purpose. There is still a calling
on my life, to your point. And I want to live
up to that in a way that's extraordinary. When
your faith has to interpret... the departure
of someone as precious to you as a child, then
it becomes extremely meaningful to live every
day in the context of that. And I really appreciate,
in fact, I picked up a book at the conference,
Live Life Rich by Marissa. And that book, she
talks about never waste a day. And that's the
context of what I'm operating in today is really
never waste a day. I want to live every day as
a way to reach my potential so that I inspire
other people to do the same. And I think we do
that through our relationship with God and then
living out the power that's alive in us with
the calling that we have that's unique to all
of us, like you had mentioned. So much meaningful
content. And you're right. This is not an advertisement
for John Maxwell, but I just can't say enough
about it because of how much it has transformed
my life. And by doing so, given me a fire and
a passion for reaching out and adding value to
other people. Yeah. It's absolutely transformed
my world. And I'll just tell you, I... In the
context of writing on the windows of the hotel
after the March conference, I kind of went through
some exercises I know how to perform for improving
processes. I applied those to my own life. And
just as a testimonial briefly, I identified that
I had very low connection in my value system
and low leadership in my life around the activities
of watching television or scrolling on my smartphone.
And those were huge time consumers. And when
you really do the discipline of figuring out
how do I intentionally use 50 % of my available
time, including sleeping, eating, hygiene, all
those necessary things, it is amazing how quickly
that stacks up. And then referring to John's
principle of significance, he says anything of
significance is going to take probably twice
as much time as we think it will. So that's why
we choose the 50 % rule. Load up 50 % of the
time and see if you can live up to that. It is
really a challenge, but it made a direct impact
on my life. Ever since the March conference,
I reduced watching TV, eliminated any scrolling
on my phone. And I just tell you as a personal,
I'm not bragging, but I'm just telling you the
impact it can have on your life. I was reading
a book a week without any effort whatsoever.
I remember you telling me that. It was wonderful.
And then the death of my son really hit me like
a Mack truck in the middle of an intersection.
And I was knocked down. And thanks to friends
like you and others have found a way to come
back. And I am as determined as ever to live
up to my potential now. So that is really what
I feel like my calling is. I'm still here. So
there's a calling. I'm still here. I still have
purpose. And so I don't want to waste a day.
And I really appreciate Marissa sharing that
at the conference this past April. I'm sorry,
in August, just a few weeks ago. Yeah. Sharing
that example of never wasting a day is a powerful
story. Right. So, Paul, thank you again for being
on the show. I just got a couple final questions
I like to wrap up every episode with just to
help expand my resource base. And the listeners,
what are some of the top tools and resources
that you typically recommend to people? Whether
it be books, podcasts. Oh, well, I do like the
21 Irrefutable Laws of Leadership. That's a very
foundational book. I'm very much enjoying Live
Life Rich by Marissa Nelson. Nielsen, it may
be. I'm not sure I'm pronouncing her last name
correctly. A book that has really helped me in
my connection journey with others has been The
Five Dysfunctions of a Team by Patrick Lencioni.
Love that book. I have very much enjoyed The
Prosperous Coach by Steve Chandler. If you've
never checked that out, that's a really great
And another book by John Maxwell that I really
enjoyed is Success is a Choice. I really enjoyed
that read. That actually took me longer than
I thought. It's a tiny book, but it took me longer
than some because of the pondering that it required.
Anything You Can Get a Hold of by Brene Brown
is really great. I enjoy reading her. very much
if i just gaze up here into my bookshelf uh for
further inspiration uh radical candor by kim
scott really enjoyed that book uh very much and
uh other than that i have a lot of trade type
things that i've read um emin grant think again
reading that book i read it a long time ago rereading
that one i really enjoy that as well so i've
turned into quite a reader i just really enjoy
reading I like always having a book. It's an
acronym called AHAB that was given to me from
the conference. Always have a book. And that
seems to really help out a lot. So my reading,
intentionally picking these books, staying focused
on that really helps me stay on trajectory for
where I want to be and who I want to become.
That's great. Thank you for those. I'm going
to do my best to put links to all those in the
show notes or if you want to help me out. And
if you have any links for those books, you could
send me. That'd be awesome. Oh, yeah. I'll try
to do that. And the Bible. Yes. Don't leave out
the Word of God. And the final question. This
is... You might know this question from John.
Who do you know that I should know? Well, I've
really got to say I'd love for you the chance
to meet my brother, my brother Mark. Mark Emery
is his name. He and his wife have recently relocated
from the Boston area down into southern Alabama.
Big culture shift for them. But love having them
nearby. But what I admire most about their current
chapter is the faith that it has required on
both of their behalfs to engage this journey.
And he is a blockchain developer, so he's pursuing
an opportunity there, as well as a worship leader
in a nearby church. He and his wife both are
engaged in leading worship there. So musicianship
is something that... Everybody in my family enjoys.
I play music with them. I play guitar at the
time. So we really enjoy doing that together.
But he is somebody I think that you ought to
meet. And I would love to arrange for an introduction.
He's also got a lot of fantastic intellect and
observations that would be very engaging on a
podcast like this to discuss purpose and the
journey he's been through. His unique approach
to life and DNA. fingerprint are uh are fascinating
to me he's a dear friend great brother awesome
well thank you yeah definitely i give me his
uh contact information and uh or set up a uh
or you can set up the conversation that'd be
awesome yeah we'll do awesome well guys um i
hope you enjoyed this episode of the pursuit
of calling podcast And if you did enjoy it, don't
you know you can go to Spotify, give it a five
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this episode with your friends who you believe
would get benefit from it. And guys, I'll see
you next time. See ya. Thanks.