What's going on guys? Welcome to this episode of the Pursuit of Calling podcast with me,
your host Thomas Carney. So I have a wedding this weekend, so I didn't have time to record
a new episode for you guys. However, I got a backlog of stuff that you guys have heard
in the past. One of the top episodes that you guys really liked was one that Sean and
I did with Dave Miller. He talks about his trial of going through alcohol addiction and
how he overcame it through community and what really God how God moved in and through his
life. So guys, check it out. If you guys haven't heard this one before, it's going to be great.
If you have heard it before, give it another listen. I will say I apologize for the audio
quality. I didn't have the same setup had a little bit of a janky setup at the time.
So forgive that Ian's going to do his best with the editing. We'll see how good it gets.
But before we dive in, I want to ask you to send me a message. If you have any questions
or you want me to talk on a particular topic, or you just want to say some encouraging words,
you can do so on Instagram or via the email that is listed in the show notes of this episode.
All right, guys, see you in there.
We got special guests for you today. You're going to love it. And Thomas, you can take
it from here.
All right. Yeah, today we we have special guests like Sean said, we have Dave Miller.
Thanks, guys. Thanks for having me. Yeah, I'm honestly really excited for this episode
because we Sean and I aren't the best at reaching out to people sometimes when it comes to getting
guests and now we're getting better at it. And whenever you asked to be on, didn't you?
Yeah, I said if you ever need someone, I'm happy to do it. Right. And like, I was like,
OK, this is up until like the team night the other team night we had the other day at Amplify.
I was like, OK, this is happening. And then I was like, OK. And then and then I got the
be reminded who you are again by just like your personality and how bright you are. OK,
thanks. And like, like it was like I was talking to Ian and Brady, who if people don't know
who that is, they work on production and I.T. at Amplify Church. And I said, yeah, I'm actually
really excited for this because like just like how like it because like that reminded
me of like specifically about your servant heart and like that, how you like dove into
just production because there was a need. And I will maybe go into that a bit, but like
that's not going to be the main topic of the conversation. But yeah, I like spontaneity.
Yeah, I don't I don't always like being put in a box. Yeah, I like jumping in where you
know, when you see that there's help needed, I like just kind of that spontaneity of jumping
in and just kind of helping out and contributing. Yeah, for sure. And. They kind of get into
like talk to them, talk to the audience real quick. So we were trying to figure out like
what we were going to do for the episode. And I had an idea of and maybe this is a separate
episode, but I had an idea of specifically focusing on the servant heart. And then you,
Sean mentioned what you said and like about wanting to talk more about like habits. Yeah.
And diving into like your your own struggles because of like what you've gone through and
like maybe I can help some people with my testimony essentially. Yeah, for sure. And
I was like, let's do that. Sounds like because I I wanted to be true to you. I think that
like this, like whatever and whenever we have guests, like it's not always going to be like,
oh, what do they want to do? Right. But that whenever you gave that option, I was like,
that actually sounds like that sounds like it just sounds like it would be something
just knowing you're like the little bit I do about you would be something that would
be beneficial to not just trying to deny, but to the people, all the people that listen.
Yeah, for sure. And I, you know, like, you know, I haven't known you guys that long.
And you know, it gives me an opportunity to get to know you guys a little bit better as
well. Especially through church. You know, these two guys are amazing. You got it. You
got it. You got to subscribe to this channel. These guys are for young people, man. They
have a heart for God that is just on fire and they're they're world changers. And I
just feel blessed that they're in my life and in my children's lives as well. Thanks,
Dave. David's the man. I always love your heart and behind the scenes, the strength
that you pull in from the church, like what God's given you is a specific gift. And I'm
excited today because we go a little deeper and we get to go a little deeper into who
David is. Yeah. And it's gonna be great. Cool. Yeah. With that said, though, like, you said
you got a milestone coming up. Yeah, yeah, I do. So October 1st of this year, I will
have 11 years sober from alcohol. So yeah, yeah, it's been a journey for sure. Yeah,
definitely been a journey. And what specifically about that journey? Did you kind of where
you think about talking about today? Well, kind of a little bit of background. Yeah.
So so growing up, you know, I grew up here in Plumboro. And, you know, I have a younger
sister and mom and dad were in the house. My dad was a pretty rough alcoholic when I
was growing up. And, you know, it's funny, they say you you become, you tend to become
what you hate. And I always thought to myself, man, I'm never going to be like that. You
know, I don't want to be that person. But it's sort of in your DNA, you know, it's
sort of what you know what you're brought up in. And unfortunately, I guess when tough
times come, you've kind of fallen that default of that type of behavior. And, you know, it's
something that I fell into later in life. Well, probably when I probably started drinking
when I was like 15, 15 years old. And yeah, so, you know, like I said, it was around me
all the time. I was in that environment a lot. And I guess it got it got its claws on
me. So and starting at 15, and then how long did that you said now you've been 10 years,
11 years? Yeah, right. I'm 53. So take 11 off of that 42. So about 15 to 42. Okay. And
was it like a big problem that whole time? Not the entire time. It's interesting. I wasn't
a person who, like I didn't drink every day. Yeah. But when I did, it was all out. Like
there, I couldn't once I started, I couldn't stop. So you know, a typical night for me,
you know, going out to the bar might be 15 beers and shots, you know, essentially, pretty
much almost a blackout every time. You know, that was I just once I started, I couldn't
stop, I couldn't put it down. And, you know, that led to some, some, some issues. So, would
you be mind that diamond maybe diving into some of those issues? Yeah, sure. Yeah, sure.
So, you know, when when you're younger, you don't have the responsibilities. It didn't
seem to be as big of a problem, right? Because I just had me, I didn't have a wife, I didn't
have kids, I didn't have a lot of those responsibilities. So the effects of it didn't seem to be as
as big back then. Although, you know, there were times, you know, it had cost me a job
at one point in my life. It had cost me some relationships and friendships in life. It's
just, it's one of those things where you become sort of a slave to it, you know, and believe
it or not, you know, growing up, I was very shy, and very, my I had huge self esteem issues,
huge, and I still battle with a lot of self esteem issues today, to be honest with you.
But growing up, that was that was really hard for me to talk to anybody to, you know, meet
girls, like I just I couldn't. And I think the alcohol that kind of numbed me and kind
of brought out this, I don't care about the consequences type of approach, you know, like,
well, if they say, No, who cares? I'm, you know, I'm having a good time anyways. And
so, you know, it was really self medicating, you know, some of some of the issues that
I was going through, you know, later in life, I was diagnosed with clinical depression and
anxiety disorder. So those are things that, you know, I still manage today. But do it
in different ways, you know, instead of going to the going to the bottle, you know, I've
gone to therapy, I take some medication. And, you know, and obviously, you know, my faith
has really been a key part in, in, in beating it.
That is deep. And honestly, I feel like a lot of guys go through the same type of situations
in life or like, for me personally, I know that I, I battled on anxiety and depression.
And it caused me to do things like drink, smoke, sleep with around, yeah, and do all
type of other stuff. So, like, I love that we're going so deep, because I mean, honestly,
these are like, this is real talk. Yeah, for sure. You know, and I think, I think if we
look at the issues that we deal with, just anybody in life, it always goes back to your
childhood, 100% goes back to your childhood, you know, and again, you know, it wasn't an
ideal situation in my house. My dad was pretty rough, he would get pretty rough. You know,
I kind of tried to protect my sister and, you know, get no, you know, kind of take some
things there. And I think just going through some of those things, and just the world that
we live in today, you know, everybody has some anxiety and some depression. And, you
know, those are some things that I think everybody deals with, you know, and I'm so glad that
it's finally getting to be a little more comfortable and a little more acceptable that this stigma
around mental health isn't what it used to be. Right. And I honestly think everybody
should be in therapy today, just the way the world is. And I mean, you know, people go
to the gym to work out their body and to stay in shape. Boy, our mind is under attack all
the time, you know, from the enemy, from the world. So why wouldn't you go to someone that
is an expert in coping and dealing with those things? So I heard before, I feel like it
was somebody in person that told me this, that therapists, like, they were given a calling,
and God gave them a calling to be able to understand, to want to know and understand
more about like, how the human mind works and understand so like they can understand
more about how your mind works than you do. Yep. Just by having like a quick conversation.
Yeah. And there's a reason that a gifted they have and they wouldn't have it if it wasn't
meant to be used. And there's like, I'm, I've been in therapy for like over a year,
and I was going every week and just this last session that we had to decide to go over other
week. And she looked at me, saw a video over the video and she like looked at me and said,
yeah, you're ready. You're making progress. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And that's the thing, you
know, I think a lot of times people might want, you know, might try therapy and you
know, if they just think man, they didn't do anything, I don't feel any better. It's
a process, you know, and it might be the person you're with too. Sometimes it's going to a
couple different people to find the one that you kind of gel with, right? Right. And but
you have to, it's a process. I, you know, I've related to the gym again, you know, you're
not going to get in great shape going one time, you have to do it consistently. And
I think it's the same thing with your mind. Absolutely. I agree. I think like you have
something to say? No, no, absolutely. I agree. I feel like if somebody can't get therapy,
then you should at least have good counsel where you're able to at least release what's
on your mind. Like having a minister or somebody you can just sit there and talk to if you
can't afford therapy for whatever reason or situation is, but therapy still needs to happen.
There's different types of way of therapy. Well, go to a therapist is good. Go to a pastor,
go to a counselor, go somewhere where you're able to release the mind. I agree. I think
even like, I think for trying to figure out which direction I want to go. I, one thing
is I really, I think a lot of people don't think they need it because they're not in
a really bad situation. And I, like you were saying, like the world is so like messed up
nowadays. You might not know you're in a bad situation, but you might think what you're
going through, right? It's just like, it's just your life. Yeah. So therefore why would
you need to go to therapy for it? And that's just how it always has been. And I feel like
you get to the right therapist just for like just one session and wondered like you said,
maybe it takes three or four, but your eyes can be open to so many other things. Like
as to like, maybe there are links back to your childhood to what you're going through,
how your mind works right now that you weren't thinking of before. Right. And so I don't,
I think a lot of like me, I didn't go to therapy until there was like the immediate need for
it. Yeah. And I think if people like you said, like if they went to, if people go to the
gym when they're weak and they're, when they're weak and they keep, but they keep going when
they're strong, they don't, you can't stop. Right. So like whenever you're going to, whenever
you go to therapy, like doesn't there, so you don't just go whenever you're in a bad
situation. Right. Like you go, you go whenever you're, you go whenever, like just because
you want to grow. Right. I want to know more about myself. Yeah. And I think, you know,
obviously we're different generations, right? So I'm 53, these guys are in their twenties.
31. 31. But he looks like he's 22. No doubt. Oh God. Amazing. But like my generation, you
know, the way I grew up was, you know, I, I had to grow up and I had to, if I wanted
something done, I had to take care of myself. Right. I had to do things for myself. My generation
was you don't talk about your feelings. That's weakness. That's a weakness as a man. It's
not something you do. You deal with it. Right. You shove it down, you deal with it. That's
what you do. And that's kind of how we were brought up. And I think that's a reason why
a lot of people don't go and why I didn't go for a long time because I thought that
makes me less of a man. You know, if I can't deal with this on my own, you know, just suck
it up. Just deal with it. Honestly, I think our generation still got that. Like I think
the newer generations finally getting that released off of them that you can talk about
being your feelings. Cause I feel like me and Thomas specifically have heard all our
lives, men don't cry, all the rest and other stuff that like men as men, we're not allowed
to talk about any type of feeling type thing. And it's just like now, now we're just now
starting to disassociate with the older generation about that. You know? Yeah. I'd say probably
in the last 10 years, five years, it's become way more acceptable compared to like the seventies
and eighties, way more acceptable in the last 10 years than it was back then for sure. But
the other thing I just wanted to touch on is, you know, I know that what I've realized
is that, you know, some of these trials we go through, some of these weaknesses that
we have, or some of these defects that we have, if you will, what's amazing is, is how
God uses those things to help others. I can't tell you how many times for no reason I've
sat on a plane, you know, used to travel a lot for work and I'd sit on a plane out of
all the seats, the person who sat right next to me was dealing with severe anxiety for
flying or I run into someone and, you know, they're dealing with alcohol or drugs issues
and just way more than it should be naturally, right? So I'm very open about my past. I
talk to strangers about it sometimes, you know, I just love talking to people. Yeah.
But it's amazing how what you've gone through, you can use to help others. Yeah. And God
really facilitates that and just in a miraculous way.
Man.
That makes me think about just my own personal experience with my current situation. I've
thought of, like we had a conversation yesterday in our one small group, how it's whenever
I feel like it's a lot easier whenever you're in tune with God, to be able to say like,
my situation can be a testimony even while I'm in it. It's good. And it's not just
like at the end, it's not just at the end of it where like, oh, look at what God brought
me through. It is a good thing. Like you get to the, like something you can get to at the
end, you get to the end of your like a trial. Yeah. And, but even in the midst of the trial,
God's still there.
Well, it just gives you so much credibility, right? So, you know, if someone were to talk
to me about, you know, battling alcohol or addiction or depression, whatever it might
be, if they haven't gone through that, you know, in my mind, I feel like, man, you just
don't, you don't understand. Like you don't get it. You know, so while we're going through
it, there's other people going through it. And, you know, as they say, iron sharpens
iron, right? So if you're in that same place, you know, you can help each other along and
encourage each other. So I think that's, I think that's huge. You know, one of the biggest
influences on my life is one of my best friends, his name is Pat Barnes. You know, he goes
to church with us and Pat's just an incredible human being. And he has been such an influence
on me and maintaining my sobriety. He also, you know, he's had some experience with it,
and he shares that. I'm not sharing anything that he doesn't share openly. But he is, he
has been my rock through going through this, you know, there have been, I'll tell you what's
interesting is, you know, like I said, I'm coming up on 11 years, but it's still, I don't
want to say a daily battle, but it's still a battle even after 11 years, you know, it's
funny about once a year, I'll have a conversation with Sarah and she knows it's coming. Sarah's
my wife. She'll, she's gotten so, she's amazing. She's gotten so good at it, you know, where
I'm a hundred percent serious. And I'll say, you know what, I'm a different person now.
I'm older now, I'm more wise, I'm in my faith, you know, it would be fine for me to have
a case of beer. I can put one or two in the fridge that way I don't drink a ton. And I'm
literally thinking at that time, at that moment, in that moment, that I can do this, like I
can do this. And you know, when I first started doing this, she goes, no, you can't, no, you
can't. And it's amazing. She's learned that she just listens and I talk through it. And
at the end I say, no, you know what, I can't do that. So I get to that place where I'm
like, no, I can't, you know, but it is, it's hard because, you know, you go out with your
buddies and they're having a couple beers and the way the world is, you know, it'd be
nice just to kind of numb yourself a little bit, just to get that relaxation feeling.
You know, I still crave those. I still crave that. I do. But you know, it's about community.
It's about who you surround yourself with, right? And you guys know, I mean, you know,
you surround yourself with good people and people with, you know, similar values, similar
beliefs. And you know, you have that person to kind of lean on their shoulder when you
need it, you know, and you know they have your best interests at heart. You know, one
thing Pat and I did is, you know, we kind of at the beginning of our relationship, we
kind of had a pact that we said, if we see some, if we see each other stumbling or messing
up or doing something, you know, not real godly, we give each other permission to call
it out. And I think everybody needs accountability for sure, especially as men. We need accountability.
And you know, and in the moment when you hear it, you know, you might get a little upset,
you know, you know, say I raised my voice to my son and Pat might go, hey, Dave, you
got to, you know, the immediate reaction is, don't tell me what to do. That's my kid, right?
That's what you think immediately. That's kind of your reaction. But you know, we made
that pact, you know, and I know he's coming out of love. You know, he's not coming to
put me down or to embarrass me or humiliate me. He's coming from love. You know, we've
done that back and forth with each other over the years where, you know, we need to call
each other out every once in a while and say, hey, you know, get back in step. And you know,
but we have that relationship that we know that, you know, it's out of love. So.
Come on, Billy is huge. Yeah. I also believe what you said was so deep about like people
you surround with because the Bible talks about bad companies or bad company corrupts
good manners. So like you could be having all the right intentions, but if you're surrounded
by the wrong people all the time, their views and they'll get to you like, you know, I mean,
if if you're not pulling them up, they're pulling you out. And that's so important to
see that like, OK, OK, now this I'm out of this lifestyle. Let me go around people who
have the same mindset of I got out. I'm not going back. You know, yeah, so powerful. There's
a few good things in that Bible, huh? It's gotta be good. Forty different authors. It's
insane.
And I think I'm going to kind of pivot us for a second. Yeah, I think what you're talking
about is really good. But you also mentioned how you had to establish these new habits.
And I wanted I was kind of curious as to what those were and how you went about establishing
them.
That's awesome. That's awesome. It's interesting because I remember the day that something
kind of clicked in my mind and it was a church and our founding pastor, Pastor Lee, had
given a message and it was about guardrails. And he talked about in his life, you know,
he realized that, you know, it's it's a healthy practice to put guardrails up in your life.
Like he gave examples of, you know, he used to travel a lot for work. I used to travel
a lot for work. He would say, you know, I one of my guardrails was I would never be
alone with a female at any point. It's just a good guardrail to put up. Yeah. And he said,
I would never drink more than two, two alcoholic beverages within 24 hours. He said, you know,
because as you know, you know, once you kind of cross that threshold, you know, your decision
making all those things get kind of fuzzy and you lose the ability even more to resist
those temptations. And when he said that, it kind of clicked with me. And I said, man,
you know what, that makes a lot of sense to me. Putting guardrails up in your life to
kind of protect yourself and protect your heart from temptation, right? Because temptation
strong and people who are Christians and might be listening to this, you know, once you become
a Christian, it's not like the temptations go away. In fact, a lot of times the enemy
wants to attack more because you're living the life for Christ now. Right. So by using
those guardrails in all kinds of facets of your life, that's kind of where it started.
But I knew my guardrail had to be zero drinks. Yeah. I couldn't do two. Right. So it had
to be zero. So I decided that day literally to stop. And I did it on my own, which I don't
recommend. There's a lot of great support out there like Alcoholics Anonymous. There's
different Christian groups and small groups that you can go to about it. But being a hard
head that I was, I just said I'm going to do it cold turkey. And it worked for me. It
was tough, but it worked. And that was really the thing. So, you know, some of the habits
that I got into, you know, I quit going to places where it was just about partying, you
know, those I eliminated those. I had to eliminate some friends in my life. Right. That that
was kind of their deal was just kind of going out and partying it up. You know, I kind of
had to separate myself from that a little bit. Like the other side of community. Yeah.
Exactly. Exactly. And, you know, just things like and it's interesting because with habits
and with addiction and things, a lot of times you tie them to certain activities. Like if
I were to go to a Pirates game, you got to have a beer when you go to the Pirate game.
You hear people say it on TV. You hear your announcer say it on the radio. You know, someone
will say, Oh, I didn't drink last night, you know, because I have you went to the game
and you didn't drink a beer. What's wrong with you? It's like, no, those two don't
have to go together. You know, they really don't. There's a lot of pressure in society
that put those things on you, you know, and I would say alcohol is really tough because
it's legal. You get it anywhere. Right. And it's everywhere around us. Anytime you get
into the restaurant, anytime you go to a sporting event, anytime you go, it's always there and
you can get it. You don't need to sneak around. You don't need to go to a special dealer.
You know, I mean, you can get whatever you want. Absolutely. There's nothing to prevent
you from getting it. So, you know, it is it's a it's a struggle. It's a not a struggle.
It's a battle. You know, you got to battle it. And yeah, those are some of the habits
that I that I really kind of focused on. Also, you know, going to church every week and and,
you know, also just again, that getting that community around you being around the right
people. Yeah. And replacing it, you know, replacing it with other things, you know,
healthier things. So that's wow. That's so good. Yeah. Like, Lee, he told me about
guardrails. When you were talking about it, were you talking about like I remember a message
that was like more recent than three weeks ago when you're or what was the month ago?
Couple months ago. Yeah, I know what you're talking about. When he was driving, he was
talking about that. This was 11 years ago. I was like, he just talked about that recently
too. Interesting. Yeah. But that's not so that you remember the like the details, those
details after 11 years that speaks to the impact it made. For sure. I mean, it's you
know, it's it's a complete change of life. Yeah, it's a complete change of life. You
know, it you know, and then and then you worry about it. You're like, Hey, am I going to
be fun or people going to want to be around me? Yeah, because I used to be the jokester
and, you know, still learn. My age now, man, I don't do the crazy daredevil stuff I used
to do because it hurts way more than Yeah, I used to have no fears, no consequences,
you know, all the time. Just just getting out there and getting wild. But yeah, no,
that's good. But yeah, it's a big life change. So it is something that you remember. And
it's something that you know, it's a big pivot point in your life for sure. Yeah. I think
that's so powerful. I love the Bible always refer to it. But like when the God talks about
how we overcome Satan, he says by the blood of the lamb and the word of our testimony.
And that's so powerful because your testimony, Dave, is going to help so many people who
are in that struggle now and those people who have overcame that struggle hearing it
so they keep staying on the right path. It is so powerful to hear that. Also, it might
just help people like maybe they have gone have gone through it and have now overcome it. Be more
open about about sharing that sharing own testimony because a lot of the time you might a lot of
time people might just think like who's going to listen to me? Yeah, it's going to listen to what
I have to say. Yeah. And it's nothing to be ashamed of. Yeah. You know, fact is something
you should be proud of. Right. And especially if you can help someone with that. And you know,
I would just say to anyone out there that is struggling or is thinking that maybe this is
becoming an issue. Just talk to somebody. Yeah. Reach out to someone. You know, don't don't don't
do it on your own. Don't hold it in. Let someone know. You know, check out the Implified Church.
Go online. Check out our church, man, because we are a church of broken people. You do not have to
be perfect to come into our church because we'd have zero people. And we've all been through things.
We've all had life experiences and we're there to help, support and love. So, you know, and again,
the church has been such a big part of my life. And that was the other thing, you know, my dad's
parents, they were both really bad alcoholics. And he went through a really hard life. And then
it kind of carried on to him. Right. And then it carried on to me. And you know, once I had children,
I said, you know what? This has to stop. Yeah. Like the chain has to break here. Like I don't
want my kids to ever see me wasted or, you know, being a fool. And I don't want them to have to
deal with this. So, you know, the one thing about Amplified is, you know, I am so, so thankful for
people like you and Sean, and just so many other people that have just poured into my kids' lives.
And the fact that they have such a strong relationship with Christ, it was funny because
when my younger son got baptized, my older son got baptized a couple years ago, and then my younger
son got baptized last year or this year, I can't remember. But once he got baptized, I went to one
of our pastors, Brandon, he was there. And I said, Brandon, I can literally die tomorrow. I said,
my life is complete. My boys are saved. And I said, you know, I could die tomorrow and it's okay.
And because unfortunately, they're going to go through struggles. And they have gone through
struggles. But man, but do they have a base, a foundation that I never had? That's the other
thing. You know, I only became a Christian at 40. So, you know, I didn't have God in my life, but
boy, they do. And what a difference that makes in life. It's just, it's huge. So I'm just so
thankful for, you know, your guys' generation and the way that you guys pour into these younger kids.
And just, it's just, you guys are incredible. I can't imagine at your age being where you guys
are at, because I was such a, so, so lost at that point, you know, and you guys are just so amazing.
And it just gives me hope for the future. So. Yeah, I really appreciate you saying that, David.
That is meaningful. I think the same thing when I look at, like we had Andrew on here. And I think
the same thing when I look at him. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And because whenever I first started coming
here and he was 18 when I first started coming and I was like, how much do you know how much about
the Bible? Like I've read like a page. In the beginning. That's what I have. And like, so now I
know, I may not, like, of course there's a different time span between us and, but like, but I can't
kind of get the testament. And also like, there's one thing that's probably in my mind the whole time
you're talking, like while you're talking though, specifically about alcohol, because like, I never
really don't know if you would call it a, it was a problem to the extent of whenever I would go out,
I drink just get it was a social thing to do. Yeah. And I never got to the point of blackening out.
I've got a point where I've lost a couple hours, but like, that is blacking out. Yeah. Losing time.
Okay. So it doesn't mean you pass out. Right. Sometimes you do, but blacking out is losing the
period of time. And like now I've, I like right now they, I never decided to stop drinking. I just
don't. And like part of it was just like, it was expensive. Like my last beer run, like I remember
it was like $70. And I was like, I was drinking IPAs and I get to drink and I was like, like,
man, I can't, I can't, I can't do that. I just never went back. And like, I have a cabinet full
of like bottles and stuff. And like, I haven't touched it in over a year. Are you trying to tell me?
No, sorry. Sorry. We have no bottles.
Don't make your brother stumble. But, but, uh, no, I, I, I, I said, I was telling John the other day,
I think I told my friend David, um, I was saying like, I tried some whiskey the other day, like a
couple of weeks ago, just like, yeah, you know, I haven't had in a while. It's been there. It's like,
I'll try something. And I took a sip and say, and this stuff is gross.
And I was like, I was like, how do I, I had half the bottle gone. I was like, how am I drinking this
stuff? I was like, I'll just drink it. Cause it was like the manly thing to drink. Right. And I, um,
I bought it cause it had a monkey on the bottle. There you go. That's perfect sense. Yeah. I was
like, why not? And like, um, and like, I feel like I just lost it. I personally, I feel like I just
lost the taste for it. Like I, I like, I'll go out, I'll still have a beer when I go out and I just,
like one casual beer with a friend and like, but like having it at home, like it feels like
that was like the old, in my old life. Yeah. It feels like I was thinking, like what I was
specifically thinking about while you were talking, it was like whenever I,
specifically whenever I became a Christian, I was starting diving more into my faith more
because I was, I was just technically a Christian Roman Catholic growing up, but like I fell away
from my faith for a while. And I, like that was part of that life was drinking and having always
having beer in the fridge and then like going out every other weekend. And, um, and
and like, I think about it now, like I do not like who I am whenever, even after a couple drinks.
Yeah. So I'm like, I don't know. So it's like, I just don't. It's like, it was, it was like my,
I never really, I never actually made that decision. It was just like, it just fell off.
Yeah. And I think like I'm thankful for that. For sure. For sure. Like it just like was never
like the temptation was like the temptation was like gone. Like the idea of like drinking, like
it like was almost detestable. Yeah. And with that also, you know, when you're in that,
you know, especially if you're, you know, in an addiction type level, it comes with a lot of lying,
a lot of deceit, a lot of bad things, right? And that weighs on you too. So, you know, it's not
just the physical effects of alcohol that, you know, that make it troubling. And again,
I'm not saying for everyone, a lot of people can have a couple of beers and that's awesome.
You know, I'm jealous. I wish I could have two beers and stop. That'd be great, but I can't.
And I kind of compare it to like, it's almost like an allergic reaction. Like if you were allergic
to penicillin, Sean, and you took penicillin, your body would just react in such a way.
If I took it, my body wouldn't react that way, right? I kind of see alcohol the same way for me.
It takes a hold of me. Yeah. And it takes me into dark places. It just affects my chemistry
differently. So, you know, I'm not saying people can't drink ever or anything like that. You know,
if you're sensible and responsible and you can, that's awesome. You know, that's good on you.
But, you know, just for me, it just didn't work. I honestly agree. I mean, I feel like
when it comes to alcohol specifically, it's like, it's taken me to the very darkest places
of humankind. And the man I was when I'm an alcoholic is awful. Like, literally, I'm a womanizer
when I'm drunk. Because I'm trying to do everything the world wants. I think everybody else who's
worldly would think I'm fun and exciting because that's the worldly look of things. But like,
once I got, like I agree with you, Thomas, when I got into a real, because I was a prodigal son,
I've done everything under the sun. But at first I started with a relationship with God from like
from zero until like 19. I had a really strong relation with God. 19, I had fallen away when I
was in college, first week of college. And because that's when you get your freedom. And then you
act stupid with the freedom. Right. Yeah. So that was me. So like, diving deep into that, most of
those problems and reason why I didn't finish college was because of alcohol and weed. Yeah.
Yeah, literally, those were the things if I was if I wasn't getting weed, I was drinking, you know,
those drinks were like, okay, I was drinking because it's the social norm every Friday and
Saturday, you got to party hard, boom, boom. Oh, we're having a party Tuesday, this time we had
to drink, you know, I mean, like wherever the party was, you had to drink. And those drinks was like,
okay, now that you're drunk, you can be crazy fun, Sean. And now that you're crazy fun, Sean,
you have to find a hot chick and sleep with her. Yeah. Otherwise, you felt for the night. Yeah.
You know, I mean, and that was like the mindset that was behind it. And that's why like, it's so
incredible what God does. Because now, like, if I have a beer, right, it's not the same as when I was
drinking before, because now I can't really enjoy a beer like I used to. I'm not going to hold you.
As as a Christian, man, it's not the same as where I was when I was a worldly man drinking a beer,
because when I was a worldly man, I was thinking, okay, I drink this beer, and now I can get drunk
and I can drink. But now when I drink, I'm just like, bro, this is nasty. Why am I doing this?
Like, you know, like the taste is like, why? Like, it's, I tried to do it to be funny. What am I
doing? It's like, the after I do it, it's like instant regret. Like, why'd you do it? It's not
good. It didn't taste good. There was no good outcome from it. You know, I mean, pros and cons.
Yeah, so not too many pros. A lot of cons. No, like, honestly, that's why I lost my Walmart job,
because I was being goofy. My friends were golfing. They came in, work with a beer. And I was like,
oh, shoot, let me pastor drinks beer and be funny. And boom, yeah, wasn't funny consequences, right?
And it wasn't like, oh, I was like, buying beer off my friends or like plan to drink that day.
The devil just tempted me because I haven't drank in like three years. And he was like, here, just
have a sip and boom. Yeah, just like that. I can't believe you said prodigal son, because
that is absolutely my very most favorite story in the Bible. And it's the one I relate to the most
is prodigal son. So I can't believe you said that. That's incredible. The other thing is one of the
things is when you're consuming, you know, lots of alcohol and getting drunk, you do stupid things.
But the next day you can say, I was drunk. I was an excuse. But guess what, when you get sober,
you don't have that excuse anymore. So you really got to, you know, it's a whole shift of your
mindset. It's like I could still be a crazy dude and sober. But now if I do something really dumb,
or, you know, something that's immoral, I can't say, I was drunk, you know, that's me now. That's on
me. And, you know, so that's another that's another adjustment that you make, I think.
I want to like speak to a couple of things like the fact we talked about two different sides of
community that you brought up of how being in the old community of what was causing you to essentially
go off the cliff and go over your guardrail so you hadn't set yet. You go over the cliff and
realizing like part of the guardrail was that they're actually, for you, those people were
actually like, the people at least in those activities would put you over the edge. And then
realizing that there's a different community that could help you have a healthier life.
Not, they don't even have to be like telling, like you have Pat Barnes and like, but even
specifically, you don't even necessarily need to have, like you should, I feel like it's great.
And I feel like if you have, you know, if you don't have somebody in your life like that right now,
maybe it's because you don't have the right, like you're not surrounding yourself with the right
people. Like, I have Andrew Regatta and like we talk to each other and like I'll ask him like,
did I, like, was that dumb? I'll ask him like, was that dumb? And I feel like you'd have to ask.
But like, just being around people that have like,
like I think, specifically speaking from like a Christian standpoint, being around people that
have that like visible wisdom and like have that, have that, had that, whether like peeping around
you who has been through something and has been through stuff that you've put yourself, that you
put yourself through, but now know what it's like to go through that. Like, just being around before,
before knowing that, like I would still, like I still think the same thing of like,
like, oh wow, like he's, he's this light, he's this person who people see and like he, like he has his
heart to serve, he like always seems to be in this bright happy attitude and like now you're telling,
and now you're telling like what happened way before that, what led up to that point. So like,
having that one question written down and we're definitely like way over time, this is gonna be
a long, this is gonna be a long, this is gonna be our longest episode. I think people will love it.
But like, I'm just like, I'll ask one final question. Sure. And then we'll, and then,
is it the beauty and the breaking pretty much? Not specifically, I don't know where you're going
with that, but. Because that's what you were leading off with just now. Like, was it? Because
you were talking about how they, well, he was all broken and stuff, right? Now that God has refined
David into like the man that he is now and he is happy and enjoys from all the broken pieces.
So the beauty and the breaking. Okay, well you got that out of what I said. That's not where I was
going, but that's where you got out of it. And you guys listening, the dynamic of these two is amazing.
You just gotta see it. It's, I love it. I love it. They're amazing together.
What were you going, Thomas? My final question. It's where the people, like,
prefer people who are out listening who don't know what their guard rail should be.
And like, how, like, if they're like, I don't have any, I don't feel like I have any guard rails.
How do you go about identifying what those be are? Yeah, that's a really good question. So I
shared, you know, for me, it came through a sermon, right? Yeah. Through Pastor Lee.
You know, if you don't have that, number one, I'd say get into church. Find a church near you.
Plug into a community. It's life changing. It's amazing. It'll change your life forever.
But, you know, if you're looking at yourself and deciding, you know, what guard rails can I set up,
I would say take a look at, you know, what is bringing you down? You know, what is causing
stress in your life? What is causing you to argue with your friends or your significant other?
What are those things that are constantly negative? What are the effects of what you're seeing?
What are the effects of what you're seeing? And then find guard rails to help you keep away from
that, right? That's what guard rails are. Like you said, going over the cliff, right? So what are the
things that are sending you over the cliff? You know, if it's drinking, then you put up a guard
rail and you say, listen, I'm not going to drink. If it's pornography, you say, well, you know what,
I'm not going to be alone on my computer, you know, whatever it is. But again, you need to find
someone for accountability. You know, that's huge. Don't keep it to yourself. Share it with someone.
Let them know what you're doing and ask them to hold you accountable. That's so important
because we're not strong enough on our own. We definitely are or not. And that's where God really
comes in because God is strong enough. God can overcome. He can do miraculous things. And, you
know, having that faith and having that relationship with Christ and with God is key, I think, in
anything in life. You know, and it's just such a better life, man. I can just tell you that
the other side is so much better. It's hard. And especially at first, it's difficult. But it's so
much better. It's so much better. And if anybody ever wanted to reach out to me, you know, I'm
happy to talk to anyone. So, you know, if you see me at church, see me out, whatever, come up, man.
I'm happy to talk to you. So, it's awesome. Yeah. Well, thank you, Dave, for coming and having
that, staying down with us because, yeah, this was, I've been saying it every time we record a new
episode, but this is now my favorite episode. He says that to all the guests now. He tries to butter
them up. I also have to say, you know, they can't see it, we don't have a camera yet, but I really
like that watch. Can I tell you a funny story about this watch? We'll ask and we'll end. So, you know,
back in the day before kids and, you know, I was making decent money and had more expendable income.
Yeah. You know, I would buy some really nice watches, you know. You know, I have like Tag Heuer
or Movado, you know, it might be 1100 bucks, 1200 bucks. Nothing super crazy like, you know,
Rolex is 10 grand, but nice, you know, expensive watches. Yeah. And they were nice. This watch that
I have on right now, I exponentially get more compliments on this one. Every day, almost people
point it out and go, I love that watch. That's amazing. Guess how much this watch costs. It's
the cheapest watch in the set, huh? Guess how much? It looks nice though. I'm gonna guess 300 bucks.
That's around what I was gonna guess. $30. What? $30.
So again, it goes, that's another great thing. It goes to show you, right? Yeah. It's not always
about the brand. It's not always about the clout. It's not always about how much something costs.
Let's go. That's good. Literally, this is the second one I've had of the exact same watch.
So $30. So yeah, you don't have to spend a lot of money, you know, to have nice things, I guess.
Yeah, that's wonderful. Yeah. No, but I appreciate you guys having me. Seriously,
this was so much fun, especially for an old man like me to hang out with you guys. And, you know,
this is a different world for me. So I loved it, man. I loved it. I love you guys and just
thanks for having me. Yeah, for sure. We love you, Dave, for real. And the words you spoke
will definitely, definitely help other people. So that's amazing. Awesome. I appreciate it.
All right. All right, guys. Thank you for listening to this whole episode. Really appreciate it.
This is definitely our longest one. But if you don't already, if you're listening on Spotify
or listening on Apple Podcasts or any platform that you can subscribe, definitely give us a
follow, subscribe, five star review and share us on social media if you really like this episode.
We honestly really appreciate it. Every single time we see somebody share out one of our episodes
on Instagram or Facebook or whatever platform you're on. So, but yeah, we'll, I'm going to say
I again, thank you. Thank you, Dave, for coming down and we see you guys next time. We love you.