Hello, everyone, and welcome to this week's episode
of Trinity Talks. My name is Kyla, and I am joined
here by a couple of moms and one of their kids,
and we're going to just chat all about Mother's
Day and about what is so cool about moms and
being a mom together. So thank you so much for
joining me, folks. Maybe I'll just get you to
start by doing some introductions. So maybe we
can start over here. Do you want to introduce
yourself? Say a little bit about you and your
family? Sure. My name is Farida Sadat. My name
is Farida. This is Avila. We're a family of four.
I'm going to a party. You're going to go to a
party later. Very cool. I have two kids. Yep.
Evie Love and John Rumi. Two and four. Okay.
And I'm also an entrepreneur. Okay. Yeah. We've
been going to Trinity since when I was seven
months pregnant. So since 2021 we started here.
I was the first baby. You were the first baby.
That's so cool. Okay, yeah, maybe we'll go over
here. I'm going to the park now. Okay, cool.
So maybe we're going to go over here now and
we'll listen as Trish introduces herself. Okay,
bye -bye. I'm Trish and we're also a family of
four. No. I'm a pro musician. I play keys, synth,
and piano here. Okay. Trini and my husband, Drew,
he's on the parking team. And our oldest daughter,
Jazzy, she's going to be 13 in August, and she's
in junior youth. And our youngest daughter, it's
our late daughter, Tione, and she would have
been nine. Okay. Yeah. Thank you. And we've been
here one year today. It's the anniversary. Okay.
Yes. Congratulations. We're so glad you're with
us. Yeah. Yeah. So maybe. Just want to start
a little bit talking about, you know, what it's
like being a mom and what is something that maybe
was unexpected for you in motherhood? Something
that you were like, I wasn't prepared for that
or like I didn't expect that thing. No, no, no.
Being a mom is the hardest job in the world,
bar none. I never, ever expected it to be this
hard. And, you know, I'm a career woman. And
out of everything that I've done, I would say
being a mom is the hardest. I think if I were
to just focus on being a mom, it would probably
be much easier. But because my life is not just
about being a mom, it's also about, you know,
having my own business and making sure that I'm,
you know, I still have that identity of my own
as well. It's definitely, it's... it's, it's,
it's a challenge for sure. Uh, doing all of that.
Um, and it's definitely, um, I'm trying to do
it all, but it's, it's a challenge for sure,
but it's a very rewarding being a mom. Absolutely.
Like it's a beautiful challenge. It's one of
those things that it's kind of hard to put into
words, right? Cause it's like, you know, there's
the beautiful moments and then there's really
challenging hard moments as well. But, yeah.
But I feel like my life is richer with my kids.
Oh, okay. Okay. Evie Love, what do you think
is the best thing about your mom? Cooking. Cooking,
yeah. You like to cook things together? Yeah.
Do you have a favorite thing that your mom cooks?
Yes, soup. Soup? Okay. Soup is very good. I like
soup, too. Yeah. Yeah. But yeah, as you were
saying, like all of those bits to sort of, yeah,
juggle and tackle and being a mom, but also being
yourself and being someone in business. It's
a lot of pieces for sure. Yes. Yeah. What about
for you? What was sort of unexpected about motherhood?
The first round, I'd have to say I was diagnosed
with a rare pregnancy related disease. Okay.
And then having to like navigate that and all
those different things that come with that. Yeah.
And the second round. um, being bereaved. Yeah.
Yeah, for sure. Going through that. I mean, breathe
mom, which is, it's a, it's a lot different than
just, uh, for sure. Yeah. It's just, there's
a lot of different challenges and unexpected
things. So that's definitely unexpected. Cause
you obviously don't plan for that. Yeah. Yeah.
Yeah. You have a picture of like what this journey
is supposed to be like. And so you just, it just
automatically shifts to the left and yeah, you
have to be really good at pivoting and you're
always learning. So like every day, just like,
any type of mom but it's just another level that
you have to yeah yeah yeah yeah work through
yeah for sure for sure yeah and like carrying
all of that with you and yeah yeah it's I think
it's safe to say that like motherhood changes
you permanently right right whatever that situation
is for you that yeah yeah you are not the same
person that you were yeah yeah for sure Um, what
about like things that you've sort of learned
along the way? Is there like one thing that you're
like, ah, this is like, you know, my biggest
mom learning or like my, my thing that you've
been like, ah, that's yeah. A piece. Um, prioritization
for sure. My life is different now with kids
than when I didn't have kids. Right. Um, I only
have so much room. for, um, things in my life.
So, you know, the life that I used to lead is
very different and my circle of friends are very
different. Sure. So, um, you know, a lot of changes
on, on that front and prioritization. So a lot
of stuff that we talked about today, actually,
uh, during the sermon is very, um, relevant to,
um, my experience as a mom and. prioritizing
the things. My kids have to come first. Sure.
before anything else. But same with, you know,
my career right now is because I started entrepreneurship
at the same time as being that, like, I, I think
I started two of the biggest challenges in life
at the same time. So yeah, there's not much room
in my life for a lot of things that I used to
do in the past, like planning things with my
friends and like all these exciting trips. Like,
yeah. I don't have any time for that. Sure. And
actually, it's kind of cool because now my friends
have kind of stepped up and they're planning,
which is kind of nice. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
It gives you it's a whole new season where you
learn these whole new skills. But yeah, then
your relationships shift, obviously. Yeah. Right.
I know. Maybe. Yeah. We'll see. I know my money.
Yeah. Yeah, your mommy, she's pretty cool. She's
got lots of stuff going on. I know. Yeah, you
know, those kids. Yeah, what about you, Trish?
On the back of that, yeah, I think it's the prioritizing,
the pivoting, all that. Being a musician, I actually
am a recording artist. I actually was doing it.
I just kept... working through it even though
I was sick and stuff so that was a whole like
oh most people ah you know take a break but that's
just not how I'm wired so I just and it was like
okay so how do I do this while doing that and
it's still that's just like that's like what
Jazzy knows though she's like oh I have a musician
mom like that's just what it is so right she's
been to rehearsal she's been to the studio right
little kid I'm just sitting there yeah that sounds
good she's she's actually been able to critique
other musicians they're like oh so what do you
think of that And she doesn't hold back. She
knows. Yeah. I said about that. Yeah. Right?
You'd know. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. We got some
confidence over here. Kids are actually the best
because if you really want to know if you're
good, if you're not so great. Yeah. So what do
you think? You think, oh, because I'm her mom.
Like she had a, she was younger. She, oh, I have
a little band. Yeah. I'm like, okay, I'm going
to audition. And she's like, you didn't make
it. I actually. I did not shoot. I didn't make
it all these other people. Yeah. Yeah. You're
great. She's like, no, I think the note was you
today. You just didn't have it. So. No, she's
moving in a different direction. Okay. There
you go. That was like right there. Yeah. Yeah.
For sure. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, it's so fun. I think
like, yeah. Getting to like see your kids at
these different sort of ages and stages and yeah.
Like watching them grow up and yeah. Then suddenly
they're too cool for you. Like, yeah. Like, what
was that? Thankfully, you're not quite there
yet. I don't know. Are your kids too cool for
you sometimes? Oh, I mean, we're not going through
that yet, but I can definitely see that happening.
That's definitely going to be my future for sure.
I mean, they already think that they know more
than me. Like, trying to read a book to my kids
sometimes, she's good. But, like, my son, John
Rumi, he wants to read to me. Right. Yeah. He's
two. Right. I'm four. You're four. I don't know
what kind of future I have out of me. Right.
Yes. Yes. Abby Love's already running the show.
Already is. Yeah. Right. So in all of these things,
what would you say is the best part of being
a mom? What's your favorite? You're like, ah,
this is why it's worth it. I feel like the biggest
thing is just being blessed and getting the opportunity
or chosen to raise like mini -me's. And that's
so cool to see, like, especially like, okay,
daughters and they're growing up and it's like,
she'll do stuff and people are like, oh yeah,
you look alike and this. And then there's the
personalities coming in and she has musical talents
too. Right. So she's currently in jazz band and
concert band. And so it's really cool to see
that she wanted to do that. And so there's, I'm
like, oh, look at that. And it's so cool that
she's appreciating it and respecting it. I didn't
push for that, but she's sure. It's really cool
to see that. Like you're raising raising them
up and it's like, oh, wow. Like, OK. Yeah. Yeah.
And do you feel like like at this point, I'm
sure, you know, in 13 years, there's been an
evolution of that relationship. Right. So like,
do you feel like at this point? it's like you're
able to like connect on a different level in
that way like because you have these different
with her even as a baby yeah you know how most
times like the sound is too much and we always
put like the headphones on yeah the sound she
we used to try that yeah off and she just so
big concerts and she's just vibing and she's
always been like that like have her in the studio
as a baby and yeah like oh you know like Keys
is my main. So, okay. But I have other instruments.
No. So like the guitar, like the drums, we'll
just, you know? Yeah. And so I think we've always
had that. So we've been blessed that way. I've
always had that connection with her. And I think
it's just, it's growing. Yes. And so there's
more appreciation. She's getting older. So she's,
I think, understanding and appreciating more
of what I do. Sure. And like what goes into it.
And then like, oh, you do all of this. And then
you also do all of this for me. And I think that's
more what's happening. Yeah. So she's like, oh,
okay. I'm learning this instrument and I'm just
learning it. And then, you know, And then you're
doing that and you're helping me and you're doing
this. So it's nice to know that it's like, oh,
see, like, yeah, I can do all that. And we juggle,
right? It's back to the ties in juggling. But
when they understand it, like when you have young
ones at first, it's like, okay, yeah, mom, just
do this. So you're, you have your business, you
have what's going on. They're like, whatever.
But as they grow, they're going to be like, mom,
thank you. You were here. You did this. They'll
see it. And then you'll get the cards and the
picture. She's an artist too. So she draws a
lot for me. And so it's, it's nice. And it's
like, oh, you're. respecting that and oh you
appreciate it because we know they do but like
when you actually get to a point where they just
come and say it to you sure like oh okay yeah
those like those like it's like those rewards
those moments where they're like I'm so appreciative
yeah yeah yeah absolutely and that's definitely
my future right now with you know the two and
four stage that I'm going through I think the
best thing is them meeting you sure much like
i mean it's the it has it's the best and the
worst sure yes yep you know the best of it is
like when they come home they're like mommy mommy
mommy and they just you know when i want to see
you and you're like you know the first and last
thing no and you're everything yeah um but then
there's also times where it's like enough mommy
mommy mommy right yeah it's like yeah it's good
and it's yeah yeah because it's like overwhelming
like love and affection and all of those things
and sometimes you definitely need a break right
yes both things can be true yeah yeah yeah absolutely
yeah yeah yeah for sure um what about like the
hard parts of being a mom are there pieces that
you're like wow this was like really challenging
and like maybe didn't expect that or just like
continue to walk through that i think um One
thing for me, I mean, as they're growing and
you know they have to find their own way. So
they're going through stuff and you know that
there's going to be times where they're hurting.
And yet you have to let them experience it. You
can't jump in. You can't stop it. You can't fix
it. They have to do it. And you know what's coming.
And yet, so it's like it hurts because you're
a mom. You want to jump in. You want to help.
But you know that they have to do it. They have
to go through it. They have to experience it.
So probably that. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. For sure.
For sure. What the future is going to be like
for them, especially in this day and age where
there's so much chaos and with what's going on
with technology and all of those things I worry
about when I think about my kids. But also right
now, the hardest thing is, you know, we're not
trained. as adults, how to speak to kids and
have them listen to you. Yep. Right. Um, and
no matter how many books you read or whatever,
it's going to play out differently, uh, in real
life. So some of my, some of the hardest things
is just very simple, rudimentary things like
getting them up in the morning, getting them
to do the things that they're supposed to do,
getting them to listen to you, behave all of
that. Like, you know, um, uh, discipline you
know those are very hard and sure um i i consider
myself more strict than Anthony. Um, I think
he's, he has more leeway and also like then also
being aligned with your partner on those things.
Right. And in terms of like how much TV they
get and all of those things, um, are, are definitely
the hardest bits and also your relationship,
how your relationship plays out in the midst
of raising your kids. Right. And what that's
looking like. And are you, are you making your
relationship priority? um yeah all of those things
yeah yeah yeah yeah for sure it's not that close
sorry not that close not that close okay yeah
yeah yeah yeah but yeah i think like because
you like get you have kids but they don't come
with an instruction manual right it's not like
a oh yeah and like this is how you talk to them
this is how you should raise them these are the
choices you should make You like figure it all
out as you do it. Even if there was an instruction
manual, it wouldn't work because every kid is
different. Sure. Right. Anyway. Yeah. You're
creating it. You're creating the manual. Yeah.
As you go. As you go. It's personalized. Yeah.
For every kid. For sure. Like my experience with
my son, John Remy, is very different than with
Evie Love. Sure. You know, he's more obedient.
She's not so much. She's kind of like in her
own. She's got her personality. She's kind of
does her own thing. Which, I mean, it's not surprising
considering who I am and who our dad is. Sure.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And I think like that
goes back to like the mini me thing that you
were talking about is like they take on those
traits that you love, but then they also take
on the traits that you're like, I am like that
and I wish my child was not. Sometimes when she
speaks, I'm like, oh my God, I talk like that.
Is that how I sound? Is that who I am? Yeah.
It's definitely a mirror. Sure. I'm like, oh
my gosh. I am that. Because where is she getting
it from? Right. Yes. Not me. The other one. The
other one. Yeah. Obviously. Right? Yeah. Over
there. Of course. All the good things. And then
you kind of like sit there with that thought
and you're like, okay, I need to reevaluate.
Sure. Yes. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Um, yeah. So in
thinking about then this idea of like, you know,
there is no instruction manual. Um, but like,
what would be one piece of advice or like one
thing that you might sort of say as encouragement
to like other moms? Um, yeah. What you're doing
an amazing job. Okay. I would say you are, you
know, a gift to your kids. And just be your authentic
self. Be that. And I think the best thing that
we can do for our kids is just be there for them.
Sure. And support them and love them. Yeah. That's
the best thing I can say to them. And self -care.
Oh, my God. You've got to take care of yourself.
You've got to put yourself first, even though
it's very difficult. I know there's a lot of
self -sacrificial moms who just give, give, give,
and then you're running on empty. And then, you
know, what do you got left? So self -care is
very important. For sure. I would say lean on
other moms and use them as resources. they we're
all going through it together it doesn't matter
what age and stage we can always learn you can
learn from some younger older sure it's yeah
yeah yeah yeah yeah it's this whole yeah community
yeah and like you don't have to do it alone right
right that there are other moms there are other
people like even if they aren't biological moms
like can be there and be like no i want to like
help you support you in raising your kids and
that sort of a thing yeah yeah for sure So then
in that vein, if there's people who want to be
supportive and want to be caring for moms, what
would you say to them? What's the best way to
be supportive of people raising kids right now?
Yeah, go ahead. Where are we going? I guess I
would say ask them, see what they need, what
they want to actually be directing. What do you
need? Because I think a lot of times so many
moms are so good at what they do. Sure. And it
seems like, oh, they've got it all handled that
you don't even want to ask. You're just like,
okay, they're good. They got it. And a lot of
times I don't think we get asked a lot. It's
just like, hey, what can I help you with? Is
there anything you need? Sure. Oh, yeah. Yeah.
Thank you for that. And then and then just take
it from there. Just like see where. Yeah, that
goes. Yeah, yeah, for sure. For sure. Keep it
simple. I mean, some of the supports that Trinity
has in place for moms is just incredible. I mean,
it's beyond my expectations. That was actually
one of my entrances in Trinity was through the
moms group. OK. And then. You know, it was a
little bit of a reprieve when I would sit with
the other moms and chitchat about God and life
and whatever. And at the same time, my kids were
being taken care of. Right. You know, by the
beautiful graces and the Janet's in the world.
May she rest in peace. You know, who who were
taking care of the kids. Sure. While I got some
reprieve. Yeah. You know. And so. thank you.
I would say thank you to those people who want
to support. I just say, thank you. Yeah. Thank
you. Yeah, for sure. For sure. Yeah. Yeah. Um,
yeah. So maybe last question to sort of think
about this, like as a mom, are there any ways
that like that experience of becoming a mom of
raising kids has like influenced your faith or
your relationship with God in some way? Um, you
know, challenges things that you like understand
differently. Yeah, yeah. It's definitely, faith
has become more important since I've become a
mom. I try to bring my kids to church and have
them be part of the church, even though that's
not how I grew up. Their dad is a Christian.
I come from a Muslim background. That was my
faith growing up. But I didn't come from a very
religious household. And my religion, if you
want to get into it. Sure. I'm a universal deist.
Sure. Right. I believe in God first and foremost.
But I just love coming to this church and I find
God when I come to this church. That's what's
important to me. Sure. Right. Yeah. And so, yeah,
I want faith in God to be in my kids' lives.
And I think I've made it more of a point to do
that now that I'm a mom. For sure. Yeah. Evie
Love. Evie Love. What? do you like to do with
your mom? Do you have a favorite thing you like
to do with your mom? Play with blocks. Yeah.
What do you do with the blocks? I make houses.
You make houses. That sounds so cool. She loves
magnetic. Oh, the magnetic tile. Those are very
cool. Yeah. And I have, I have another kind of
blocks. Another kind of blocks too. Yeah. Yeah.
And you build things with your mom? And there's
another block. I have three blocks. You have
three kinds of blocks? That's so cool. It's fun.
Yeah. Yeah. You like spending time and playing
with your mom? Yes. Yeah? I think your mom's
pretty cool. Do you think she's pretty cool,
too? Yes. Yes? Okay. That's awesome. I'm sure.
Yeah? Yeah? Do you like coming to church with
mom? Yes. Yeah? What do you like to do at church?
Play. You like to play at church? Yeah. I think
there's probably some blocks here, too. Yeah.
I don't know. You don't know? There's lots of
things. There's lots of great things here. Thank
you. Yeah, for sure. Yeah, what about for you?
How has, like, faith and motherhood sort of interacted?
Well, faith has always been strong for me. Since
becoming a mom, obviously, with the situations
I was in, I've had to lean more heavily. It's
got me through and I just, I leaned on it more
and more and I just trusted that God had us and
he had a good plan for us, even though like whatever
the future held, we would still be blessed and
we'd make it through. So yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah,
for sure. It's just, yeah, it just continues
to grow. Yeah. Yeah. That's so good. Yeah. I
think that, yeah. In, in both of those stories,
there's this sense of like, yeah, that God has
become this place where you can like, Yeah, see
yourself a little bit more and to like trust
God with your family, right? And with whatever's
happening. You have a keychain. That is so cool.
Who's on your keychain? Who's on your keychain?
Rumi. Rumi. From the? Keep up the good work.
Oh! Oh, very cool. This is a whole thing, the
K -pop Demon Hunters. I've heard lots about them.
Huge. Massive. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Cool. Well,
thank you so much, folks, for joining me for
this conversation. Yeah, just giving us a little
bit of an insight about what it's like being
a mom now and all of the joys and the hardships
and the walking through that together. And thank
you for tuning into this week's episode of Trinity
Talks. Whether you are a mom or whether there's
kids in your life or not, I hope that you are
able to find some family, some sense of community
where you can also continue journeying alongside
God with all of the people that God has placed
around you. And we'll see you again next week.