Hey y 'all, whether it's morning, evening, or
afternoon, I'm just glad that you guys had decided
to vibe with E. Yes, the one and only E. Hey
y 'all, hope y 'all feeling amazing, doing amazing,
and just being amazing overall. And if not, it's
okay. It's alright, my friend, because you know
why? Bedtimes don't last forever. After every
storm, there is a rainbow, and you're getting
closer and closer. Every day, my friend, to that
rainbow, that lot of gold, that python in the
tunnel, whichever you prefer. Okay? okay once
again y 'all hey y 'all what's up what's poppin
if you're new here welcome welcome welcome and
for the ones that are not new to this but true
to this hey y 'all what's up what's poppin y
'all we are in the third week of March which
is so crazy how we're already getting down to
the wire soon already like this is really scary
but hey you know we're spring you know well spring
is approaching spring is approaching us and I
really hope that this season that's coming in
with spring fills a lot of good things in your
life you know let go of the negativity make you
guys feel whole but most importantly make you
feel important in areas where you probably think
you are slipping and things of that nature but
trust me my friend i want you to hold on to them
bad times because the bad times have helped us
to get to the good times take it one day at a
time and i guarantee you you're going to get
to where you want to be slow and steady wins
the race okay okay guys so like i mentioned we
are in week three already when it comes to march
and we are still in the theme of becoming you
leveling up the next level you as we going back
to within february when with all impacting you
know finding yourself again and not losing yourself
because that's one thing that at times when we
are starting a new chapter in our life and things
like that at times we do forget What really matters
and that's us in the center? Especially when
we're the type of people that are always there
to help others pick them up and things like that
We have to go back to what really matters and
that is impacting becoming you me I Whatever
making sure that we are becoming the people the
person, whatever, that we want to become by understanding
the next level of us, what's important, how to
handle it, and why it's important, but most importantly,
what is going on while we are in this level of
leveling up in our new chapter. Okay, so I hope
you're feeling present and open to growth this
week, and if things... and if things have been
feeling heavy that's okay too healing can be
powerful but it can also be exhausting if it
becomes the only story we talk about ourselves
now we are on third we have 38 newsletters so
guys once again if you want to be Add it to the
newsletters every Wednesday at 3 .30 p .m. Eastern
Time. Please click the link tree wherever you
listen to me or watch me or look up the link
tree of Vibing with E. You'll see the icon of
signing up for weekly newsletters. Click that
and put your email in and once I see it you guys
will be on the now you will be a part of the
newsletter's email. So yeah, so when it comes
to this part right here y 'all healing can be
powerful But it can also be exhausting if it
becomes the only story we talk we tell ourselves
we talk we tell ourselves So with this being
with that being said y 'all healing is a gift
Healing is one of the biggest things that we
want to do, but that doesn't make us who we are
It's a part of our journey is a part of who we're
becoming but it's not who we are as a person
like oh I'm in my is we have those things in
life like you do have a healing stage But if
you keep talking and talking and talking and
talking about The same old story and playing
the same old sad song you won't be able to find
a joy within the morning Yes, we all have our
healing stays. Yes. We are in a moment of you
know Getting ourselves together things of that
nature, but that doesn't make us who we are that
helps us But it doesn't define who we are in
general. It's not your personal trait It's not
those type of things it helps but if you keep
it that way It hurts you and it haunts you for
you to be in the stage of the next level of your
life for you to become you to find yourself because
if you keep having these exhaustion and not so
good vibes going on it's not going to get better
it's not going to get better at all and you're
going to make healing a part of your personality
when it's not when in the process we are preparing
for the better healing is helping us we're in
stages of our life but you don't want to keep
playing that old sad song of when i was depressed
i was depressed because If you keep being depressed,
you won't find joy. And you won't understand
the full clips and glans of joy. You have to
find joy. Like, I believe in a saying, if you
wake up mad, don't go to sleep mad. If you go
to sleep mad, don't wake up mad. You know, you
have to change the narrative because the more
and more bad days you have, the more and more
things are not going to go as planned. Trust
me, I've been there, done that. I'm on spring
break, y 'all. You know I'm trying to get the
rhythm of you know it not having to worry about
homework and stuff right now But it's still like
at a time it gets frustrating when you know you're
used to something and then You won't pause right
now for good But then sometimes certain things
and people will take you there and you have to
remember. What is my logic here? You know I'm
disciplining back to the conversation. We had
discipline over motivation. I gotta remain to
understand that right now I'm disciplining myself
on what I can handle when I What I can't handle
the motivation may be here may not be there But
it's not part of my personality me keep being
consistent of who I am and staying taller firm
on it That's what matters most then we keep having
to play this old sad song of Depression trying
to take over because that's not going to happen
and I want you guys to understand it So if you're
a part of this or you have a friend Tell a friend
to tell a friend This is not going to be your
story forever. It's a part of it, but it doesn't
make the story. It's a part of it, but it's not
the whole main idea. It's a little bit of context
clues, you know, a little bit of piece of information,
but it's not the main idea. It's not the main,
in the beginning, the middle, or the end. It
is not. It's in the story. It's a stage. And
a stage don't last so long. So let's kick this
out of the blue, you know? Here it could be powerful,
and it can also be exhausting. But we have to
understand that we have to make our story the
way we want to be. Do you want to keep hearing
that old record playing sad song or do you want
to hear upbeat tempo here and there? These are
questions we have to ask ourselves on a daily,
every day, okay? So, as we continue our March
theme, Becoming You, The Next Level, you This
week's reminder is simple but powerful. Healing
is a chapter of your life. It's a chapter, it's
a state of your life, it's in your life. It's
not your entire identity. Like I said, like,
healing's not a part of your personality traits
as we deep dive deeper into you guys understand
that. It doesn't hurt you as much as you think
it will but it can be exhausting but don't make
it bigger than what it is. Healing helps us to
understand ourselves. Healing helps us process
pain. Healing helps us grow beyond what once
hurt us. but healing is not meant to keep us
stuck in the past healing is helping us to get
rid of it not get rid of it but get out of that
mindset like i've been through things you've
been through things your friends and telefriends
family whatever we all been through things and
the process of healing is to help us get out
of that mentality take that stagnant out and
think of the brighter things you know the finding
brighter things in life and not that same old
sad song playing on a record player That's what
this is. At some point, growth asks us to shift
from consistent revisiting our rooms to building
the life we deserve beyond them, becoming meaning,
allowing you to evolve past survival mode and
to step into thriving. So yes, healing. We're,
you know, we're stepping out of that zone of
I'm on survival mode. Now I want to get into
the part where I'm laying this to rest. This
ish happened, you know, now I'm laying it to
rest. It is what it is. It is a part of the journey,
but it doesn't identify who I am. Yes, I've been
through this, but that doesn't define who I am.
Vice versa for you. You, my friend, probably
went through hell and high waters with certain
things, certain people, but that doesn't make
you who you are. That's a part of the journey,
but that doesn't... Entirely impacts who you
are. It's not your personal trait. We've been
there. You've been there done that We all did
it doesn't make you who you are It helped you
develop into the person that you want to be especially
when it comes to our theme Becoming you as we're
entering the next level of you Okay So yes, y
'all you are more than what you thought you you
are more than that Well you more than what you
thought you could be but you're also more than
you have been through We all been through things
our life that people will tell us back and forth
like you're not gonna do bad All negativity comes
to mind where people be like, you know, something
we like you are what you been through. No You
are more than what you've been through more than
you thought you were going to be. You're not
in that stagnant mind no more. You're not doing
that. You're in the process of healing. Healing
is a gift. Healing is a part of a journey that
is needed for you. It's not a part of your personality.
It is a part of helping you in your chapter or
season in your life. So don't forget it, okay?
Because impacting with this, this week's challenge
is I want you guys to X yourself. Ask yourself,
am I growing beyond the healing or am I staying
attached to identifying what's being hurt? Choose
one action this week that reflects the version
of you who is moving forward rather than... Trying
something whether that's trying something new.
That's it rather than Rather, you know try something
whether trying something new Setting a healthier
boundary or allowing yourself to enjoy Because
I'm yourself to experience joy without guilt
do what's necessary for you because yes We are
and this healing is a gift stage, you know, but
it's not making us who we are It's it's a stage
and it's chapter of our life, but you have to
also identify if I want to get out of this Excuse
me, hell -hole, what do I have to do for myself
for me to be healed, to be whole as a person,
to have those feelings of frustrations out the
window and gone for now? What do I have to do?
How am I going to do this and why is this important
to me? I understand that healing is a gift. What
we've been through doesn't identify who you are.
It does not, because we change. People change
seasons, monthly, yearly, days. We change. Certain
stuff is not going to stay the same. Healing
is not a part of your personality. Healing is
one of the things that's going to help you when
we're in this theme of March right now, becoming
you, the next level you. And I want you guys
to understand that you are in control of this.
You're in control of becoming who you want to
be in this next level of your life. Going back
to February's Thing when we said, you know, we're
leveling up and not losing ourselves now in the
process, you know I'm not losing myself no more
but now I have to embrace this becoming me era
and Understand that this next level of me leveling
up is ten times More important than me having
to deal with me being a survival mode. I'm scribing
now I don't want to stay a survival mode because
healing is not a part of my personality. Is that
a character trick for me? Okay, it's not don't
make that. Oh, this is what it is. No That's
why you have to be cautious of what you say and
how you say things. I know sometimes it's like,
dang, but it's okay. You learn something new
every day. Education doesn't stop. Learning doesn't
stop. Even if you're in a classroom or not, education
is flowing all around. Knowledge is being flowed.
You just have to absorb it like a sponge, especially
with you learning what you can take, what you
cannot take. Red flags, good fear, green flags,
pros and cons, x, all that. In this stage of
you becoming you, the next level you with understanding
that healing is a gift and is not a part of your
personality, you're gonna understand more who
you are and what's for you and what's not for
you, my friend. Take it one day at a time and
surround yourself by people that is on the same
path as you or been there and they're willing
to help you, a mentor of role model things of
that nature. It's okay to get help from others,
trust me. I'm here for it and I'm learning every
day about myself, what I can take, what I cannot
take. One day and one step at a time and no monkey
is going to stop my show. I'm in control of everything
that goes around here. I'm going to show you
how to do this and I'm going to pop out when
I want to. I'm taking control and I'm being selfish
of what matters to me and you need to do the
same my friend because Handling is not part of
your personality is a part of the journey And
yeah, you know, what's for you what's not you're
gonna get there because we are in the process
of Becoming you we're becoming us. We want to
see we're in the next level of leveling up Okay
So Okay, I want you guys to do that, you know
try to see Are you in the healing stage or I'm
staying attached to things that hurt me? Do you
wanna, it's like you know we say you know that
hurt me but I'm trying to heal but if you keep
talking about what hurt you you're never getting
yourself time to heal because you keep talking
about it. Let them things let them people go
slowly but steady but don't wait until it's too
late to do that. Okay? Because growth happens
when you allow yourself to become more than your
past. You, like I said, you are in control of
what you can take what you cannot take. You are
in control of how you want your healing stage
to be. You want to stay in survival mode, or
do you want to strive? We are in survival mode.
We've been there, done that. We want to strive
for success. We don't want to be stagnant no
more. We are in control. Growth happens when
we take control of it, when we let those things
in the past go. You know, we hold on to them.
Thank you. Love on them. Kiss it. Thank you.
But we're not going to keep on holding on to
it for so long, because if you do, it's going
to... Effect us for being in the next chapter
of our life bad times unless forever and there's
no there is a rainbow Because good, you know
your things are happening, but you have to take
it one day and one step at a time Okay So now
y 'all vibing out with guests vibing out with
guests remains. You know a space where Real conversations
create real growth, real vibes within the stories
from me, the guests, and all those good things,
because every story shares inside. This series
has been rooted in honesty, healing, reflection,
and growth. Guest appearances will be opening
soon to book that will be the last. So next week,
Vibing Out with Guests, individual series and
group sessions, well, I say series, individual
sessions and group sessions will be opening on
Friday, March 27th, 2026 at 3 .30 p .m. So, please
get prepared to book your appointments today.
Book your sessions today. I cannot wait to see
you guys. Yes, the bookings will be open for
a good little while unless something happens.
You know, life be life and it is okay if you
have to take a mental break and stuff. Take it
from me. Things happen, you know. You gotta step
back sometimes when things are not in your control.
But as right now, I'm saying this here loud and
proud that on Friday, March 27th... 2025 3 30
p .m. Eastern time vibing out with guests will
have sessions available for individual sessions
and group sessions up to three okay so I cannot
wait to see you and all you have to do is click
the link tree again you will see please fill
out everything that is impacted with the vibing
out from the Um the contracts and the agreement
as well as the calendar to book the date of when
you can come We still have in person and we still
are doing zoom I haven't done a zoom session
yet, but i'm hoping someone will say yeah i'm
gonna do zoom You know for the fun of it and
we're gonna do it like brutus. Okay? So yes,
y 'all I cannot wait to see you I cannot wait
for you guys to come back in here guess as always
I thank you also very much for the guest that
has been on there to the featured guest And things
of that nature, I appreciate you all so much.
But nevertheless, I appreciate all you guys who
listen to vibing with Eve, vibing out with Guess.
If you're new here, thank you so much. Welcome,
welcome, welcome. The OGs, you're not new to
this, you're true to this. I thank you all so
very much. Thank you, thank you, thank you. I
really, really do. Without you guys, I don't
know how this will go. The more and more y 'all
help me, the more and more it helps me to be
consistent within the discipline of making sure
that I'm doing what's necessary. Okay, so the
quote of the week is healing is a part of your
story not your entire entire identity Healing
is a part of your story. Not a is not your entire
identity Okay, stay connected follow me or will
follow us or filing out with vibing dot with
e on Instagram use the hashtag vibing with e
to share how you're choosing growth over how
you're choosing growth beyond healing this week,
okay? So now let's get into the nitty -gritty
part. So vibing with E, weekly check where meaningful
conversations meets growth in real life connections.
So guys, we have reached 147 episodes, and today's
vibe of the day is healing isn't your personality.
I know y 'all see it because of the title, but
you know, still gotta read it out there, you
know? Healing is not a part of your personality,
my friend. This week's episode explores the difference
between honoring your healing journey and allowing
it to define who you are forever. Healing is
important but is not meant to be a permanent
identity. In this week, well in this week, in
this episode y 'all, we will cover the difference
between healing and staying in survival mode,
why do some people become attached to their pain
story, moving from processing trauma to building
your future, allowing yourself to experience
joy without guilt, and how growth shifts from
reflection to international lives. Okay? So this
episode is your reminder that you are allowed
to grow beyond what hurts you. You are allowed
to grow from what have hurt you or who have hurted
you in the past. You are entitled to grow, to
flow like a butterfly, to get out of that locked
up cage. You have the key to take control. Take
your foot off the brake and put on the gas and
take off. Okay? This episode, I'm glad you guys
are attentive for this episode because this is
a powerful conversation about evolving past survival
mode and stepping fully into your next level.
Okay? So, without further ado guys, let's get
into it. Hold on y 'all, I'm really supposed
to be wearing my glasses right now, but... Hey,
you know things happen, you know things just
happen out the blue, you know, sometimes we we
forget we tend to forget I know I forget but
I'm there I'm looking at them right here y 'all
like I can see it right here on my thing and
I'm like I should have put them on but I'm okay
now cuz everything is in front of my face so
we we cool we you know, but Yes, y 'all without
further ado Excuse me, if you're new here again,
welcome, welcome, welcome, welcome. And for the
OGs that's not new to this, but true to this,
y 'all already know what's going on. Okay, guys,
once again, I want you guys to... Well, I didn't
mean to tell y 'all, but... Okay y 'all, so what
I want y 'all to do is I want you guys to sit
back, relax, and enjoy hearing my voice or seeing
my face whether you're on the go or on the moving
around, whatever the case may be. I just want
you guys to sit back, relax, and enjoy hearing
my voice or seeing my pretty face. Turn me up
on your speakers, your uh, PCs, car radios, beats,
pills, alexas, google dots, cvs, phones, wherever
you're listening or watching me. From okay because
as always every vibe of the day is something
special Okay, so now let's get into it. I'm gonna
repeat it again. We have reached 147 episodes
and today's vibe of the day is based on Healing
isn't your personality Okay, if you're new here,
I break down every vibe of the day within the
definition the five W's The quote of the day,
the quote of the week slash the day again and
then help y 'all understand what it is You know
get a little bit of understand of what it is
as well as to a thank you for tapping in Well,
thank you for vibing in the new notes and then
we go on with today Okay, so let's get into it.
I'm repeated again today's vibe of the day is
Healing isn't your personality and I already
gave y 'all a little bit sermon in the beginning
when I was breaking down to you guys You know
the news that But now you understand a little
bit more until we get into the nitty -gritty
of why healing isn't a part of your personality.
Why is healing isn't part of my personality?
Why is not a part of your personality? Tell a
friend to tell a friend. Healing is not a part
of your personality, my friend. It's not a part
of it. It's not a part of your personality. It's
a part of the journey. Yeah, so it's not a part
of your personality. It's not like, oh, my name
is such and such. I can't go around saying my
name is E. I'm healing. That's not a character
trait. You know, like, I'm caring, stuff like
that. That's a character trait. The personality
trait. Healing isn't a personality trait. It's
a part of the growth of where you want to be.
Healing journey, no healing is a gift. But it's
not your personality. It doesn't make you a whole.
It doesn't make you who you are. Okay? So let's
get into it. What does healing, what does healing
isn't your personality really mean? I gave y
'all a little snippet, but let me read to y 'all
what I have, exactly. Healing isn't your personality,
meaning realizing that while healing is an important
part of growth, it should not become the only
way you define yourself. Like I said, healing
is not, healing is not a personal character trait.
It's not, it's not. It's a part of the growth,
you know, we're in a healing stage and things
like that, but it's not a character trait. Healing
helps us process pain, understand our experience,
and develop emotional awareness. However, when
healing becomes an identity, People may remain
focused on past wounds instead of moving forward
into growth purpose and fulfillment Healing is
meant to help you understand what happened Not
to keep you permanently tied to it like stagnant
tied to what had happened in the past or whatever
True healing allows you to acknowledge your experiences
while still creating space for joy growth and
new possibilities so with this being said y 'all
basically what i told y 'all in the beginning
and before then a nice little sermon i gave y
'all you know had to give y 'all the what what
why that healing isn't your personality but healing
is helping us to grow and in order for us to
let healing be able to do the job we have to
understand that what had happened to us it happened
but we cannot keep that stagnant mentality going
because if so we will never give ourselves the
time to be able to have the freedom in the space
to create joy growth and most importantly try
to be able to have new possibilities in things
in our life healing is healing isn't part of
your personality is it's important within our
healing journey but it's not it doesn't identify
who we are like I said I can't walk around and
say I can't walk around and say hi I'm Eve I'm
healing What's my ex was your personal character
trait of yourself? You can't say healing they're
gonna be like, what does that mean? You can say
yes, I'm in my healing stage. I'm in this healing
era of my life But think about it. How is how
are you? How that a personal character trait
for you? We can heal but so much people, you
know, we can heal some people But sometimes we
can't healing is different from healers if I'm
not mistaken y 'all If I'm not, I have to double
back on it. But nevertheless, you cannot walk
around saying, my name is such -such, I'm a healer.
It's impossible. And we have to understand that
when healing becomes a part of our identity,
if we make that a part of our identity, people
are going to remain on those issues that hurted
them in the past, instead of seeing the finer
things in life. Like, trust me, we all been through
some ish I tell you not healing is a gift healing
is a gift if you accept that gift and I'm keep
saying that because we get things or we hear
these things so sometimes we don't take them
for what they are healing is a gift take advantage
of that gift but don't have it where is though
is a part of your personality where you know
you know I'm healing why are you still healing
because of a situation or a personal thing or
something that you did is still haunting you
Bad times don't last forever my friend they don't
but they help us to get to the good times in
our life They prepare us and shape us for these
things that we have been waiting to see happen
But if we don't give ourselves the proper Healing
we're gonna stay stagnant and that bad time will
keep repeating all those negative thoughts. Everything's
gonna repeat So with that being said healing
isn't a part of your personality Because while
you're in this healing stage, you should not
be it shouldn't be the only way you define yourself
You can't it's impossible to define yourself
because healing is going to help you process
all these pain and understanding of Your experience
and to develop a new type of space and his space
and emotional awareness for yourself Rather than
keep saying, you know, I'm healing and I'm a
healer, you know If you keep saying that you're
not putting in the work to heal them bad wounds
and past wounds, whatever, you're not moving
forward so you can see growth for the purpose
for yourself and fulfillment. So also have the
space of joy come to you. You know, see joy in
the morning. You're not going to let that happen
if you keep having that there. No growth is going
to happen as well as no new positivity or new
new new momentals are going to happen. So Yes.
Take it one day at a time, my friend, and understand
that healing isn't your personality. It's a part
of your journey. So who is impacted? Who needs
to hear this message? First and foremost, if
you're someone that's in the healing stage and
is still in survival mode and scared, this is
for you. This is for anybody, regardless of what
titles you hold. Anyone that's in this process
of wanting to heal, needing to heal. and things
of that nature and need to understanding the
purpose of why healing isn't a part of your personality,
this is for you. This message is for individuals
who has been actively working on their self,
processing past experiences and focusing on emotional
growth. Like I said, if you're in the process
of wanting to heal, this is for you and understanding
why it's important for you to heal from these
situations. It is especially impacted for people
who have spent a lot of time reflecting on trauma
relationships or difficulty life experiences
but may feel stuck in a cycle of consistently
revisiting the same pain. It also speaks to those
who feel defined by what they have been through
instead of who you are becoming. Anyone who wants
to move from survival mode into thriving can
benefit from this. Lovely vibe of the day. So
basically like I just said y 'all we're in this
space even I'm on this journey with y 'all because
I'm still having to Understand that things that
happen six seven eight nine years ago. It's not
going to impact how it is for you now, for example
I'm about to graduate again third time third
times in a row And I sometimes I might be this
person it may not just be me Patterns, I see
some patterns. When I first graduated my associate's
degree, I seen a pattern. I was like, F it, I'm
ready to get out. My bachelor's, I didn't rush
it. I enjoyed the moment, even though it got
a little rough with me having to do my paper
and stuff like that. I still found joy within
the moment. This MSW degree hooo child. In the
beginning I was scared as hell. I'm not gonna
lie, I was scared as hell because I took the
accelerator program. I'm like, okay, I know my
stuff. Why not just put it on the flow, okay?
You can know your stuff and still be feeling
like bricks is about to come out of you. But
the pattern I've seen y 'all is that I was like,
oh my gosh my first Now get my third degree.
I feel like I'm having the same Trauma story
that I had while getting this one And right now
I'm gonna tell y 'all I'm not having that happening.
Nope. I gotta let that go I gotta let that go.
I gotta let that go. I'm in the process of healing.
I'm stepping into understanding that during that
time I was still In my teen years, I was grown,
but I ain't even hit 20 yet. I ain't even graduated
my first degree, y 'all, at 20. I ain't gonna
lie. I did it. I did it. That's probably why,
too, I was like, okay, still frustrated. I'm
still young, you know, I'm working a job. I was
working a job, y 'all, that really didn't help
me in the sense of really motivation, but I was
committed to it because I needed the money, had
bills to pay from school and things like that.
It helped me, even though the job, I didn't like
it. It was, it wasn't for me, but I still learned
something out of it. And then versus now, you
know, it's a different ball game, different time
zone, and my mindset is different. However, you
could be in a healing journey, and sometimes
you have to go back to or start over a new healing
journey. It took me a minute to really heal properly
because in order for me to heal properly I had
to get myself out of those spaces and clear my
mind but also too sometimes the healing journey
you have to be away I had to be selfish and to
take control of things that I need to take control
of and I needed to pop out when I knew when it
was necessary and let people know because when
you're at a point in your life to where things
change people change You're healing for the better,
and I'm understanding it's not a part of my personality,
but I'm also understanding that I'm Actively
working on myself each and every day and yes
bears are gonna happen trust me y 'all I'm on
spring break and already got some days where
I'm just like Fuck it Like what what like what
is going on, but I can't Double back on the past
can't do that Let that you know I put that to
rest because I'm focusing on my emotional growth
because in the past y 'all used to wild out scream
kick holla when things just wasn't there But
now you know of course I'm gonna complain about
it first and then I'm gonna get myself together
and journaling and video diary and stuff like
that are the best things that ever was invented
impacting counseling therapy It helps me to calm
down and look back and be like okay I'm growing.
I'm healing. It's helping me. And so for you,
my friend, whatever you're doing, going to the
gym, writing, poetry, whatever, looking back
at it and seeing the difference how you were
this year versus years ago, you're healing. You're
in your healing stage. You're changing for the
better. You're not letting nothing or no one
tear down what you have going on. Because when
you build something from the ground up, nothing
or no one can tear it down. nothing that no one
can say right now and that's why it's important
for you guys to understand that who needs this
message the most is anyone who is working on
themselves in process and progressing to be healing
in the proper way to get out of that stagnant
mode of survival mode anyone who wants to move
forward from survival and to move into thriving
this is going to benefit you so much my friend
because when we focus on those cycles that gave
us hell such as that relationship within a family
member or spouse or friend that really gave us
hell and tormented us in ways that we thought
couldn't happen again. And it really took a toll
on us that we couldn't trust no one again, or
we couldn't look at people and stuff like that
again. Trust me, I've been there, done that.
But one thing I learned too, while in the healing
stage, people will come in the healing stage
that you didn't expect to come. And a real big
one too. Even sometimes the people that we think
are here for a season may turn into our reasons
and sometimes our reasonable people turn into
seasons. You never know. Or a complete stranger
you never know. You just hit it off with. It's
helping you. And part of your healing journey
is like someone that's really there for you.
And I haven't met fully my people yet, but I
see who's for me and I see what's for me. It
was not for me. As well as for yourself you learn
about yourself every day Sometimes like I say
we are our biggest critics sometimes When we
don't give ourselves the time to relax because
sometimes we give ourselves a headache trust
me I gave myself I know I gave myself a hell
of a headache yesterday when I was mad about
the news that I had got But it was like I still
was able to get what I wanted, but I couldn't
get what I wanted right in there But it's like
you know what I'm healing because back then Erica
who got her first degree at the young age and
didn't see what she wanted she had a fit but
now i'm in this process you know is in this process
you know seeking herself together and learning
what's for her what's not for her and taking
it one day at a time and relying on excuse me
the resources that's helping her to succeed okay
so anyone that is going through this process
of healing preparing to heal and things like
that i want you to know that get rid of that
cycle of wanting to revisit the same pain over
and over again putting yourself in the position
or predicament that's hurting you let it go wear
healing i want you to see better days you deserve
to be happy you deserve to walk around with a
smile on your face whether if a person will look
at you have you crazy like this girl walking
around like she wants sunshine this man like
these people they who cares because you're in
your healing journey and you understand that
healing isn't your personality It isn't. All
that stuff that happened in your life, that doesn't
make you who you are. It was a part of the journey,
but that didn't develop like, oh, you're such
a depressing person. You're such a bitter, no.
At that time in my life, in that season, that
chapter, whatever my life I was, but now I'm
in the season where I'm becoming me, led to the
next level for me. I'm healing, I'm progressing,
I'm processing everything, and I'm not going
back in time to rely on those memories that had
me so messed up, that had me wanting to destroy
some things and people feel like Wreck -It Ralph.
No, because I'm in this stage where I don't want
to be in survival mode no more. I want to thrive
and come benefit. from what i'm seeing in my
healing journey what is meant for me will not
be meant for you and vice versa what's meant
for you my friend is not going to be meant for
me and for others we have to do is for us because
this for example a family could go through the
same trauma but our reactions and feelings are
not going to be the same when years to come some
will be like you know what i healed from and
i'm going to forget it But I forgive what had
happened if someone like oh hell no, I don't
forgive or forgets Well, you know, you know,
I'm I forget but I ain't gonna forgive or I forget
but I don't forgive I forgive but I ain't gonna
forget it. I forgive And I forget it, you know,
it is what it is So right now I have to understand
a healing is a gift It's a part of the journey
of you becoming who you are, but it's not your
personality Is that a personal trait? At all.
Okay? Now, what is the benefit? What happens
when healing stops becoming your identity? Well,
when healing stops becoming your identity, you
create spaces to fulfill your life again. When
you stop having this thing of where you know,
I'm in my healing stage. This is me This is the
part of my personality, huh? You got me you got
a hold of me. Now. This is the me personally
It's my personal trait, you know I'm gonna purse,
you know, I'm in this day to be I'm healing Take
it or leave it. Take me as I am a favorite song
by Mary J. Blige take me as I am When healing
stops becoming your identity my friend. I want
you to create a space that fully your life again
Create this new beginning for yourself all that
down -and -out depressing blue over Simulating
and it's so annoying mindset. I want you to let
all that shit go today. I Want you to walk out
of that time in your life to help you understand
that Time doesn't wait for no one Every day is
a new day. Like I said, we're the third week
of March January was two months ago. The first
quarter of the year is over. April 1st is the
second quarter of the year. April, May, June.
July, August, September is third quarter. October,
November, December is fourth quarter. We're changing
every day. Things are changing. And we gotta
see what's for us and what's not for us. as well
as who's for us but mainly what is for us what
is for me i'm in this stage where i'm becoming
me i'm at a new level for me but in order for
me to do that i have to stop having healing a
part of my identity i have to have it as a i
want to have it as a tool that helped me to get
to understand my new normal of the tool that
helped me guide me to feel whole again a tool
that really helped me understand that I am somebody
and I am able to move on my trauma doesn't define
what I've been through It's not a part of my
personality. Yes. I've been through it hell We
all been through some things My trauma might
have been ten times worse than yours or vice
versa your trauma might have been ten times worse
than mine Whatever the case may be But we have
to let that go because the more more we keep
that burden on us the more more it's hard for
us to even Be surrounded in things that are beautiful
again to even accept nice things Not even items
just calm it's just being able to be in bliss
of the beautiful things in life Because if we
keep that same old sad song playing We won't
be able to hear the good song that won't skip
and mess up the record player So when you begin
focusing on building new experiences rather than
consistently reviewing old ones emotional growth
becomes balanced with full with with forward
movements Emotional growth becomes balanced with
forward movement. When we let go of those things
that hurted us and haunted us in the past, we
are now in the process of understanding that
our emotional growth is becoming balanced and
we're moving forward with having these moments
of feeling alive again, feeling whole, smelling
the fresh roses, the flowers, smelling fresh
air, you know. Smelling the beautiful things
in life and not the nasty smoky smoke in the
air all that black smoke is gone. You can see
clearly now The rain is gone all that you can
see now I can see I can smell it that could feel
it. I'm at a peace. I'm in home Okay Because
instead of feeling Defined by pain you begin
defining yourself through purpose relationships,
goals, and personal views. Once you get all the
smokes out, the flame and stuff, all that out
the way, you're in the place where, you know,
I'm done feeling down and out. I'm done feeling
hopeless. Once I define myself through my purpose
of knowing who I am, what I stand for, what I
believe in, I'm pulled into or attached. like
metal, to relationships within family members,
friends, or companionship that is meant for me.
I'm reaching goals that is meant for me. Creating
goals, the discipline. And most importantly,
my personal values are whole again. I'm creating
it. I'm the captain of the ship. I'm the coach
of the game. I'm in control of what's for me.
I'm the creator. And everyone is watching because
I took my time you took your time. We took the
time out to pop out We wanted to be selfish when
it's needed Mm -hmm, but most importantly we
took control over this and understanding that
what is the benefit of understanding healing
isn't a Personal trait isn't our personality
What happens when we stop identifying healing
as our personality we understand that we're Whole
again all the smoke and mirrors are gone. We
see cleared Lee Got that 2020 vision We selling
rolls and things like that because when this
shifts allows us To experience when this when
this shift allows us people To understand what's
for us. We experience this joy. We have confidence
We have emotional freedom Without feeling guilty
towards moving forward we don't feel guilty about
it, you know I did this and I don't feel guilty
about it Especially if the packing was for me
and I want you to do that my friend. Whatever
you do. Don't feel guilty about it All because
you're in this healing stage. You're not making
it a part of your person personal trait no more
You're not saying how much a name is such a such
I'm healing no You're showing them better than
you could tell but you're mainly showing yourself
that you can do it One day and one step at a
time. You're healing when you're ready to heal.
You're popping out when you want to. You're taking
control when you want to. You're being selfish.
Most importantly, you're in control of this.
You're in control of how you want it to go, why
it's going that way, and why do you feel it's
necessary for it to go that way because this
is for you. This is for you. You. Not no one
else. It's people that's going to come into your
life that's going to be there and support you
because they see it. And there's people out there.
It's gonna give you your flowers You gonna be
like why the hell this person giving you my flowers
if I don't even talk to them like that because
they see the potential in you that you didn't
see and It's vice versa even with us. We see
things from people that they probably don't see
in our in their selves Good judge of character
And it doesn't take nothing out of a person to
be nice someone it doesn't It doesn't at all
say something nice. It helps you and it's good
for the soul Okay Now, when should someone reflect
on whether healing has become their identity?
Well, let's deep dive into this one a little
bit deeper so you can understand how at times
people do make healing as their personality,
because we're talking about why it isn't a part
of your personality, the whole root of this,
but understanding too why people have gone around
so long saying healing is a part of their personality,
and maybe for you too. So let's see. It may be
helpful to reflect on when you notice yourself
repeatedly revisiting the same pain without feeling
progress. This right here, when someone should
reflect on whether healing has become their identity,
one for sure is when something had happened in
your life and you keep revisiting with the same
pain, you haven't healed. Trust me, for example,
I can... I can most definitely say this has hit
me because when it comes to certain things such
as family members and stuff, I don't want to
be around certain ones because that pain or situation
that happened to me and them, I don't want no
part to them no more. I don't want no - I don't
want - I don't want nothing to do with you. What?
And every time I revisit it, the same pain happens.
Well, I'm gonna take that back. In the beginning
of when it started, yes, when it's calming, like
when it's still fresh, you're gonna have that.
But now I still probably throw little jabs like,
oh well, whoop whoop, but then my mind, I'm like,
I - I don't care no more. I'm in the process
of where I got bigger things to worry about.
That's where the healing came in for me. But
when someone keeps reflecting on something that
happens, where they see that healing has became
their identity, that's where it's like when you
keep on going back to this place, but you're
not in a place where, okay, you can laugh about
it. You know, sometimes what they say to you,
we're gonna look at this one day and laugh about
it. It takes a minute for you to go back and
do that. It does. It takes a while for you to
do that. This is why we're talking about healing
is a part of your personality. Yes in the beginning
It's going to eat you up alive my friend. Yes,
trust me been there done that we get to a point
It's like, you know what? I don't even care no
more I'm sit back and laugh at this because it
didn't hurt me in the end and hurt it Yes, but
it didn't affect what I got going on. It didn't
stop me making money It didn't stop me forgetting
this education. It didn't stop me for helping
people that Need my message need my word. It
didn't hurt. It kept me going That right there,
when you notice yourself repeating and repeatedly
revisiting a situation with the same pain without
feeling the progress of seeing that I've grown
from this and this person, you know, we did,
she or he or they did what they did to me. It
won't happen again because I won't allow it again.
It takes time. But if you keep going back and
you're saying you're healing, but you're not
fully healed, my friend, something got to give.
That's one point. Second point, conversations
about growth always return to the past hurt okay
we all have conversations on life sometimes you
know we talk about growth sometimes we do reflect
on in the past when it hurts but i want you to
do this when you have a conversation you know
you say yeah in the past it was it was screwed
but right now i am here to say you know it happened
but it didn't define who i was that person that
healing isn't the isn't my personality but it
helped me heal to understand that what happened
then It's not going to happen to me again. So
once you have a conversation about growth, you
don't want to always turn to the past. You want
to say, you know what? Give a little summary.
Don't give the whole experience, because that's
going to drain it. That's going to die down,
you know? When we're in the healing stage, you
don't want to keep talking about what hurted
us, who hurted us, and why this hurt us. No.
You want to talk about, yes, healing is a gift.
Healing helped me. Because when I was if you
was in that part my friend and I whatever was
in that era in our life We know we had healing
is a part of our proc as a part of our personality
What you say now healing isn't a part of my personality
It isn't healing is a gift Because it helped
me grow in so many ways and it helped me flourish
in so many ways and helped me with so many aspirations
I'm I'm fulfilled I have growth, my emotional
awareness, emotional healing, all those things.
I'm great. I'm not worried about him or them
no more. I'm not worried about things that used
to tear me down. I'm not going back in the past,
too, because I forgive. You know, I ain't going
to forget it, but I forgive. That person plays
a thing, even myself. I forgave myself years
ago, months ago, whatever, days ago. And I want
to keep hearing about it, because when you're
in your growth stage and you have those memories
coming back, It sometimes haunts you, like, okay,
am I doing the right thing? Did I heal it right?
No. Once you close that book or close that chapter
in your life with that thing or that person,
let it go and don't let it come back again. And
if somebody tries, oop oop, you walk away. The
best thing to do is take a deep breath, count
to five backwards, or count to five, one, two,
three, four, five, four, three, two, one, whatever,
and walk away from it, because you don't need
to show everybody. Everybody needs to see that
ugly side, no. Because in the process of healing
and growing for the better, you don't need everybody
Everybody don't need your attention. Some things
are just meant to be left alone. When you're
in your new beginning, things that happened in
the past, leave it alone. Don't let it come into
your new journey because you're healing. Because
those things that hurt us, why would I want to
come back again? It's going to be harder for
me to even let it go. So yeah. Number three,
you feel afraid to move forward because it feels
like you are minimizing your experiences. First
and foremost, I don't want you to feel like you're
minimizing nothing. you're on maximum control
do not feel afraid to move forward because once
you're at the bottom all you want to go is go
all you want to do is go to the top and once
you're back all you want to do is go forward
who want to keep going back back i want to go
forward i don't want to keep going back and forth
i want to go forth and forth i don't want to
keep going backwards and back pedaling no sometimes
we may slip but that's what you put yourself
to go forward keep swimming just keep swimming
keep swimming keep swimming yes it's going to
be hard we need to understand that you're in
this healing journey you're in a space where
you're obligated to control it you're the captain
of this you're the coach whatever you want to
identify it is you are in control of what you
can take in your healing journey and what is
necessary for you yes it's going to be you're
going to be afraid but you have to be you have
to get comfortable when you're uncomfortable
You know, we all get uncomfortable, but once
we get comfortable, it's like, you know, it is
what it is. I'm here. This is for me. And I'm
okay with that. And don't let nothing or no one
try to minimize your experience. No, it's on
maximum control, maximum value. You speak value
on what's for you. Yes, it's going to be, you're
going to be afraid, but don't be afraid to heal
into things, into a new chapter in your life
that's going to bring you hope and peace that
you need. Point four you find it difficult to
imagine a version of yourself beyond what you've
been through This one is a good one Sometimes
we do find it hard to imagine ourselves in a
better space let me tell you this we go through
rock bottom What's the favorite just a favorite
words like to say I wish I? Wish that I wish
that a lot. I wish this that a lot the tongue
is a powerful thing That's why they tell you
be careful what you say what you ask for because
when you go through hard shit Excuse my friends
when you go through hard times All you wish for
is a good time and within this part when you
find it difficult to imagine a version of yourself
beyond what you've been through Don't ever be
afraid to make that wish because we don't want
to live in the same Messed up environment or
whatever the case may be that's not growing.
It's not a healing. It's not comfortable for
us You have the right, my friend. Tell a friend,
tell a friend, whatever. You have the right to
imagine a version of yourself that you've been
manifesting and praying for. You have the right
to dream big on things you want to do. You have
the right to take control of what's for you.
You're in control of whatever you want to call
you, the captain, the coach, whatever. You're
in control of what's for you. Imagine it for
the good. Don't think of it for the worst. Don't
ever think of it for the worse. Yes, we're going
to find it difficult to imagine a version of
ourselves beyond what we've been through, but
we'd rather see something beyond the music than
keep playing that same sad, old -ass song on
the record player that keeps scratching and it
doesn't get clear. That makes us have to take
the needle off the record and put a new one on
there for us to experience new things. Okay?
And lastly, healing begins to feel like a permission
state instead of a progress. When you feel that
way, my friend, that goes to show you still have
it as a person, no trait. You gotta have it as
you know, healing is beginning to feel like growth,
as a process that I'm taking, and not as a...
permit state it's not a permit state it's not
a t extension babe you are in control of how
you want to be how long it is stop putting the
time on it but you're in control of how you want
it to go though and stop putting the time on
it because healing is important but growth requires
the movement beyond reflection we have to understand
that growth is a part of it yes healing is a
good thing too but growth is the main thing that
requires the movement to be what it is to see
the reflection to get the results of how we want
them to be, to understand that healing isn't
your personality. Healing isn't gonna, no, it's
not, my friend, it's not. We're learning each
and every day. I get it, it takes time, but I
need you to know that healing is important, but
growth requires the movement beyond reflection,
okay? We almost there, y 'all. Where does this
show up most in life? Healing shows up in all
areas of life. Personal, work life, school, parenting,
relationships, children, whatever. Mental, physical,
emotional, spiritually, financially, emotionally.
It shows up everywhere in our life. Everywhere.
Everywhere. Healing shows up in our life everywhere.
Where does it show up? Everywhere. Healing becomes
an identity, may show up in, may I do, excuse
me, may show up in personal conversations that
repeatedly sifted on past pain. When you're having
a conversation with yourself, the mirror conversations,
the 5, 10, 15, 20, 25, 30, 45 % hour conversation
with ourselves, and we keep on reflecting on
the past, this is where healing shows, this is
where, you know, it's keep coming. We need to
take that out. Sometimes we have, the mirror
conversation is to reflect on. What's to come?
What's next? Like it's secure What Issa did Had
the mirror conversation for everything and the
mirror talked back to her I wish that can happen
for us though, but she had these conversations
You know and she had her moments, but the mirror
was telling her what's next for her to come We're
here. You're healing babe. We need to move forward.
Don't let that do that Make a joke on that with
a rap whatever song out of it for the better
because you don't want to keep having these personal
conversations with yourself about things that
hurt and Tormented us for you. You don't want
that. We want to feel whole I want to feel better.
I don't want to keep hearing the same old sad
damn song I want to hear something that's upbeat
up tempo and fits me. I Don't want that Mm -hmm
as well as within relationships where someone
feels defined by the past experience Let's talk
about spouse type of relationships when you have
a spouse that has you know say they want to be
in a relationship First and foremost the partner
if you know your partner is not ready for do
not force that on them Especially if they still
have no one I don't want to say baggage, but
they still need to heal from the past relationship
they just got out of if You know you know you
talking to this guy just woman whomever They
tell you straight up, you know what? I do want
a relationship, but I need to heal I want you
to respectfully Respectfully take that whole
hardly because it takes a lot out of a human
being to say straight up You know what? I want
this but I need the needs are most important
than the once You know, we need the needs are
more important than your wants You need to get
yourself together in order for you to step into
this new relationship with this with this person
to be your significant other you need to heal
from the last person or last situation you've
done with you've been through you've gone through
for you to be comfortably to be comfortable healed
and now feel whole with this new person as well
as making them know too that you are healed and
that situation is beyond past you Don't rush
it because you feel like, oh, if I don't tell
this person, yes, I f my chances up. No, because
a real person will understand that if they ain't
ready, they ain't ready. And if they lie to you,
say they ain't ready, and they go back to what
they went back to, what hurt them, or go somebody
else, that mean that that person was not for
you. Ha, I've been there, done that. I seen it
happen. I seen it happen, y 'all. And I'm gonna
tell you this, I healed from what happened to
me six years ago. healed I can say this line
proud I healed I'm not saying it ever again in
the relationship when it talks to somebody unless
they asked me you know how was it I'm like it
was it was something that said I don't talk about
it no more because I fully healed what had happened
to me impacting the person that I was with It
wasn't for us, you know, sometimes things change
people change. It wasn't for you Sometimes, you
know, you may come back in the next lifetime
like arc about you say but baby I Sometimes not
and I can say that wholeheartedly. I've healed
what happened to me six years ago It takes so
many it does we keep backpedaling and keep You
know playing cat and mouse even within friendships
It gets to a point is we're gonna be friends
or not. Are we gonna heal together? You know,
we're gonna we're waiting to exhale together
We inhale and we're gonna exhale together get
it done or we're gonna keep playing cat and mouse
and we're not going in the healing stage And
I don't need that sis. Bye, bro. I don't need
that Because when relationships where someone
feels defined by the past experience it hurts
them to get into the new relationships even with
family members it takes a minute for you to gather
your thoughts and Clutch your pearls and hold
on to them to even think that well I want to
get back in touch with this person or even connect
with another Family member. It's it. It takes
a hold on you. But when you're in your healing
stage, you're able to understand that you know
what? I'm healed I'm whole I'm in the center
of peace I am NOT going to have a relationship
where someone feels defined by their past experiences.
I've been there done that baby. I'm on the future
I'm living in the present and enjoying what the
future has to hold for me too while I'm moving
around in the present. Because if I keep relying
on the past, I can't see what the future has
in store for me. If I don't live in the moment
of the present and keep on working toward my
future, because if I keep having the past keep
replaying and rewinding, nothing's going to shake.
Nothing's gonna shake with relationships from
family spouse and friend wise if I keep relying
on those incidents that was gonna shake as Well
as my personal development space where reflection
replace actions. I keep on keep on doing it.
Nothing's gonna change self -talk Self -talk
that consistently refers back to what happened
instead of what is possible You know because
it's like damn that happened to me, but okay
that what is the possibility of a good result
at the end of it as well as lastly difficulty
allowing joy peace or stability become struggling
feels more familiar when you don't allow yourself
to let joy come in the morning let peace sit
in whether it's silent and you can hear but I
say a mouse Piss on cotton a pin drop all those
old sands. It's gonna hurt you because you're
not being able to have this ability To let that
ride you so used to chaos and a whole bunch of
ruff raff wrecking Ralph Ruck rat shenanigans.
You're not giving yourself the privilege to be
like, you know what? Yeah, I deserve to be happy.
I deserve to be loved I deserve to find joy in
the morning. I deserve to have peace as much
as my mom and daddy have Huh, and I hold that
whole heart like I say that out loud. I deserve
the same damn peace they got But maybe even better
I deserve to have this ability to do what I need
to do for myself mentally physically emotionally
spiritually and financially I Don't want to keep
having those feelings of struggling and it feels
so familiar that I'm not getting myself the time
to relax As well as going back to the self -talk
if I keep on seven those mirror conversations
is not positive instead of keep talking about
what happened instead of saying what is the Possibility
of me to move forward is hurting me as well as
the personal development Spaces where reflection
needs to be replaced with the actions if I keep
saying I'll do this in it now My actions gotta
speak aloud in my words. I'm tired of hearing
words your words can be grained on much You know
they say sticks and stones may break my bones
words hurt like a bitch, too Excuse my French
y 'all, but words hurt, too. Oh Words can hurt
the hell out of you And you know, sticks and
stones may break my bones, but words can beat
the hell out of you. And you have to be able
to understand what you can take, what you cannot
take. It gets to a point, y 'all. Sometimes I
don't like the kiki ha ha. Because if I feel
like that hurt me, I'm in my healing stage where
I know I can take what I cannot take. And you
don't be afraid to stand up for yourself. Don't.
Don't. Don't let nothing or no one try to tear
you down because you are in this process of your
life where realizing that healing isn't your
personality. Recognizing these patterns can help
people shift towards healthier growth. Once you
be able to understand the personal connection,
the relationships, the personal development,
self -talk, and difficulties within allowing
yourself to have this, this is where these patterns
can help you shift from, shift towards a healthier
growth. Once you get out of the way, you're healing
permanently. You're not worried about what he
say, the naysayers say. They can talk all damn
day long till they lips fall off and hurt. You're
in a process where you know what? I'm standing
up holding my head. Hell. I don't care what he
she the naysayers have to say I'm healing for
the better healing us again I'm that I'm not
letting nothing or no one tear me down again.
I've been there. I've done it. I'm done with
day I'm in this process of I'm doing what's for
me and what I know is going to help me because
this is my healing journey This is my healing
story And I don't gotta tell nobody cuz I could
pop out when I want to I'm taking control of
what's mine And I'm being selfish in the process
of it, too Okay? And lastly, why is this important?
Why is healing isn't your personality important?
Why is it important? Why does separating healing
from identity matters? This is the whole nitty
-gritty of understanding that healing isn't your
personality and why you have to separate it from
your identity. Because healing is meant to restore
you, not limit to you. Healing is meant to restore
you, not limit to you. You're not putting yourself
on a backburn no more. You're not limiting what
you can control and what's for you, what you
can take. Nope. When people identify only their
healing journey, they may unintentionally keep
themselves emotionally connected to the pain
that they have already worked through. Separating
healing from identity allows individuals to acknowledge
their past without letting it control their future.
Bingo! Bingo, B -I -N -G -O. Let me tell y 'all
again. Let me tell you again. Separating healing
from identity allows individuals to acknowledge
their past without letting it control their future.
Once you, right there, set the boundaries, what's
for you, and that's not for you, that's you taking
control of what's for you. You're letting what's
in control of your future like I mentioned we
keep replying on the past I'm not enjoying the
present so the future can be hold I'm making
it a shitshell because if I don't let the past
be the past What will my future hold I? have
to seek the healing from identifying and Acknowledging
what the past has done to me, but without letting
it control my future. I'm not letting past eat
and mess up with with the future he has to hold,
hell, hell nah. And that goes for you, my friend.
Don't have the past you control, the future you,
and the present you, hell nah. Mm -mm, no. Because
growth becomes about building something new rather
than consistently repairing what's broke. It's
like, for example, like a toy when you was little.
It's but so much duct tape you can put on the
toy. It's but so much gorilla glue you can put
on there. It's but so much screws and bandaging
you can do. Sometimes you gotta let it go. Sometimes
you gotta let it go. Sometimes you gotta build
something new. Sometimes you gotta get a new
toy. Sometimes you gotta get a new something.
Rather than keep trying to repair what was broken.
Sometimes things like that are meant to be broken.
Sometimes when things break, it can't be fixed.
Now you have to find something new. or create
from scratch. Once it's broke, you may be able
to repair it, but how many times can you keep
repairing? How many times are you going to keep
repairing it like it's brand new, like a car?
How many times are you going to keep on keeping,
like they say, that piece of junk in a movie?
How many times are you going to keep that piece
of junk in a way to go? Sometimes it's meant
to be what it is, and it's but so many times
you keep on repairing and repairing and repairing.
And it's the same thing within your life. You
can take but so much. You can fix but so much.
You get tired of stuff. It's okay to let it go,
let it flow. This shift creates space for purpose,
confidence, and ability to fulfill and embrace
the new version of oneself. Because growth becomes
about building something new rather than consistently
let it repairing what was broke. Once that is
happening, this shift causes Space for purpose,
confidence, and the ability to fully embrace
the new version of oneself. That's why it's important
for you to understand that healing isn't your
personality and understanding why does separating
healing from identity matters. You are in control
once again of what's for you and what's not for
you. You are in control how you want your story
to be told. You are in control how you want things
to go. This is all about you, my friend. It's
all about you and your life. We're here to observe.
Me, I'm here to observe, give you your applause
because no one knows how hard it was for you
to get to this point in your life. Hell. You
don't know how hard it was for you to even get
to this point in your life, but you did it. And
you're here, and you deserve it, and you're gonna
keep on doing what's necessary for you. And don't
let nothing or no one try to steal your growth.
Stump on your growth. F up your healing journey.
Hell nah. Okay? And going back to now, you understanding
the quote of the day slash the week, Healing
is a part of your journey, not your identity.
That means you are not just the person who heals,
you are the person who kept growing. That's what
that meant for me. You're not just the person
who healed, you are the person who kept growing.
You are the person that kept growing, and you
kept flowing, and you kept doing what is necessary
for you. Okay? I know that was a lot, y 'all.
I know that was a lot. And I hope you guys learned
a lot because this impacts a lot of what's for
you and what's not for you. But understand the
purpose of healing isn't your personality. It
isn't. Healing is a part of the story. Yes, healing
is a part of our story, but it's not our entire
identity. It doesn't identify nothing. It doesn't.
You're not just the person who heals. You are
the person that keeps growing, each and every
day. And little do you know, you learn something
new every day. Big, small, whatever the case
may be, even if yourself. Featured things like
that, y 'all. Look at my hair. I didn't know
I could do this. At first, I ain't like it, but
it's, you know, it gives something. I'm learning
something new by myself, and I'm healing with
it and doing things. It took me a long time to
really embrace my natural hair. You know why?
Because I do like, you know, one point in time,
you know, you're younger. You need a perm. I
said, hell nah, I got older now. Them perms keep
straightening your hair. I like a good curl.
I like a good bounce. You know, I like a little
nice little shimmy shine. That helped me heal.
So understand, I'm healed with who I am. My identity.
Yes, I could wear some clip -ins, a wig, put
some. I could do all that. Because I'm healing
now. I'm healing. Like, I can do what's for me.
I can show up how I want to show up. And I ain't
got to worry about that man saying he don't like
how I look. Okay? I didn't do this for you, babe.
I did this for me. Okay? So yes, y 'all, I thank
you guys for vibing in with me. And with that
being said, I want you guys to keep this in mind.
Today, remember that healing helps you understand
your past, but it does not have to define your
future, like I mentioned earlier. You are allowed
to grow beyond what hurt you. You are allowed
to experience joy without revisiting pain to
provide growth. To prove a point, no, you ain't
gotta do that. And lastly, healing opened the
door. Now give yourself permission to walk through
it and keep becoming the flower that you want
to see grow. Keep going, keep flourishing, and
keep nurturing that flower inside of you or that
caterpillar to develop into a butterfly. Keep
going. Don't let nothing or no one stop you.
Let the naysayers do what they're going to do
because, baby, you're on a high horse now. You're
not worried about nothing or no one. You're not
worried about what used to tarnish you and all
those things. Hell nah. You're on a pedestal
where, you know what? I know what I can take.
I know what I cannot take. I know who I am and
I know what I'm not. Okay? So guys like I said,
I know that was a lot, but I really really hope
that you guys learned a few important points
from today's vibe of the day I really hope that
this helps you understand that healing is a gift
for you and healing isn't a part of your personal
journey It's not a part of your excuse me personality
It is a part of your journey was not a part of
your personality and helping you understand the
identity and purpose of things like that Please
please please tell a friend tell a friend look
You going through this, I've seen, I heard, or
watched this podcast, you know, and it felt like
just connected with you, and it's not throwing
shade, or tea, it's just me being your friend,
or your family member, your confidant, whatever,
I feel this for you, and I went up with the best
for you. Okay? So as always, y 'all, I thank
you so much, so, so very much, whether you watched
it in the morning, the evening, or afternoon,
I appreciate it. I really, really do. And I really
hope that this impacts with you in some type
of way. Even if it's not impacting with you now,
somewhere down the line, you can come back and
be like, dang, E made some good points in this
episode, and now I can feel it. I'm like, yes,
yes, yes, I feel it. Because like I said, y 'all,
my vibes the other day, I wanted to have a conversation.
Even though we're not in front of each other,
but it's giving a conversation. You know, you
feel me? You, I, those type of things. It's giving
real good convo, and it's not brief. OK? But
yes, I think you also very much taking the time
out of your busy day to listen or to watch me
I think you all so very much I hope you guys
learned a few important points from today's vibe
of the day of understanding that healing isn't
your personality And you may be able to share
with a friend or two and I hope you guys do the
weekly challenge of understanding What can you
do for your healing journey? With you know not
feeling guilty about it and just enjoying it
new growth new energy new spirit But also just
being happy and experiencing beautiful things
in the moment And until then guys I cannot wait
for you guys to hear me next Wednesday, which
is wellness 101 We please remember that vibing
out with gas will be open March 23rd. Oh 27 excuse
me at 330 p .m. Eastern Time on a Friday, okay?
Please be safe out here, love on yourself, know
what's for you, know what's not for you. It's
okay to have your moments, it's all right, but
don't have them depressing moments take over
your day. Find happiness, find joy in the morning,
in the night, whatever the case may be, but most
importantly, take care of yourself and be - nice
to someone you never know how much that might
help somebody shoot we all need to hear some
positivity from somebody okay and until next
time and until next time beautiful people I love
you all so very much bye