Hey y'all, whether it's morning, evening, or afternoon, I'm just glad that you guys
had decided to vibe out with me, the one and only E. And today, we are vibing out with
two of my favorite people ever.
So with that being said, I want you guys to sit back, relax, and enjoy this show because
as always, every vibe of the day is something special.
Without further ado, let me introduce my guest.
So today, we're vibing out with...
I'm Jiong Ryan.
Viong, it can be easy.
Yeah.
All right, let's get into it.
So first, how are y'all feeling on this lovely day?
I feel good.
You feel good.
No one wants to know how you feel.
Period.
I got 200 out of 200 on presentation.
Period.
I love that for y'all.
All right, let's get into it.
How are you?
Can we jump here, guys?
Yeah.
Okay, I ain't no rules.
I don't have a cuss of it.
Sometimes it's good by my own.
Okay.
You don't have to be a mouthful to me.
I can reject.
Okay, so tell me a little bit about yourself.
I'm going to start with D.R.
I love having you stuck and put it back down.
I spoke a lot of weed.
I like anime and video games and I don't know how to watch like medium.
I can watch a movie and talk about the three hours of the time shit.
Okay.
I'm talking about myself.
I'm a girl.
It's okay.
I like that.
Dang.
So I'm going to be a social worker.
I love me some Jesus.
What else?
I enjoy working with kids.
I'm currently a senior.
Period.
Yeah.
Love it here.
So another question before we get into the topic.
What inspires y'all every day?
Because you know y'all are college students.
Y'all are young adults.
Y'all are working.
What inspires y'all every day to keep moving forward?
To be the best son out on my phone.
Okay.
To be honest, I don't know.
I just want to be great.
I want to help people and get my degree.
That's it.
Okay.
I like it.
I love the answers.
Okay guys.
So today we're talking about our childhood.
And this was Naya's idea and also Dion wanted to come on here and talk about it as well.
So without further ado, I'm going to let Naya start it off with the childhood and how it would impact her and her life.
Okay.
So my mom for the most part, she was a single mom.
So like she had a village door.
My dad was there.
My dad.
So once I got to a certain age, I kind of cut him off.
Not cut him off.
He still has access to me, but like he doesn't.
That makes sense.
So my mom's village, it was my grandmother.
It was my aunt.
And I guess you can say my step-grandfather.
He wasn't technically my step-grandfather until I was five, but my grandmother was way friend until, you know, he was married.
And yeah, I had like a real good childhood.
I didn't like anything with that.
However, I do feel like that accent of like that father figure, I don't know, kind of affected me, but I did have a step-dad, but I don't mess with him with that either.
I had like a, I don't know, weird relationship with like the adult minimum if that makes sense.
But I love my grandfather.
I adored him.
So yeah, I was like a real good child.
You know, got the grades on the role.
That's good.
So I have a question.
So when you mentioned that, you know, lack of relationship with your father, is that father, do you think that affects you now as an adult?
To be honest, I guess because I don't take no mess from him.
Like I cut my father off.
I can cut you off if that makes sense.
So I kind of said is a good thing that I won't take nothing from nobody.
But then again, I felt like as every young girl, they deserve to have like that, you know, being spoiled by their dad and stuff like that.
Because I know some people when they don't have that dad figure, they like they go wow and they go, well, love in the wrong places and things like that and become fast and all that.
The whole time it's not like that.
They just looking for love.
So yeah.
So did that affect you within dating?
No, actually, I think it helped.
Because like I didn't put up with certain things from my dad, so I'm not going to put up with certain things from you.
And like I feel like I attract the men that like respect me because of that.
Like, you know, not the mess with me.
You know, not the treat me rude and anything like that.
And if you didn't know, you won't get out.
You're getting the door period.
So yeah, I had a real strong mother to like the woman that was in her village raising me.
They was strong women, strong black independent women.
So like period, you can't tell me nothing.
Yeah.
I like that the village, you know that helps.
That's really good.
I supported.
Yeah.
And I noticed another thing too.
You and Deon are both the only child.
Yeah.
And those siblings.
So how did that affect you and then Deon, how did that affect you growing up being the only child?
So when you don't got no siblings and this time the goal places is left like that.
You dad bought yourself.
So I had no choice but to like become an extrovert and like make friends.
And luckily for me, it's easy for me to make friends.
And like I felt like that.
I don't know, it kind of helped me in my adult life.
I'm not scared to talk to people and things like that.
And I feel like it's going to help me in my profession as well when I become a social worker because I don't mind talking to new people and getting to know people.
So yeah, I think it benefited me.
That's perfect.
And I get everything I want for the most part.
Like I want to share.
That's another thing that I don't like sharing.
I do not like sharing.
Don't ex me for nothing.
Like if I got clothes or something, like don't ex me for that.
Like, like it's like boundaries cool.
Like if I have a new outfit in here, don't, don't point to that one.
Like try something old.
Or if I have food, like I would rather buy somebody their own food and share my food.
Like if I'm just getting food, don't ex me for it.
Let me finish it.
Like I'm not touching it.
They make you do this song.
That makes me feel.
Okay, now I'm to you Dio.
By you being a man, so your, your opinion is going to be different and your views going to be different.
So how was it for you growing up as the only child?
On your mother's side?
Yes, on your mother's side.
Because you do have other siblings on your father's side.
Like you mentioned earlier.
I don't know.
I was just chillin.
I was on the game one time.
So I'm still going to the same guy I do now.
Still playing the game with the same girls online.
It's just middle school.
So it was like I had brothers, but they were just not my blood brothers.
Oh, so that's a good point you mentioned because like, you know, at times your friends become your family members.
So you think you're more comfortable with your friends versus your family members?
Yeah.
I'm not exactly five years, like five or seven years ago.
Being on my siblings on my father's side.
It wasn't like really siblings.
It'd be awkward sometimes.
We all just became like real, real siblings like five years ago.
So how did that affect you?
Or did it affect you?
It didn't.
It didn't?
As a kid I would just be by myself for hours of time.
Did you like being by yourself?
Yeah, most of the most part, yeah.
And why is that?
Because I don't know why I don't.
See for me it's different because like I have siblings.
Like I'm the oldest of two.
So when y'all say like, you know, it was good for y'all and you had to share and stuff.
For me it's different.
Like I share, you know, sometimes even gotta look out for them.
So it's just like, wow.
When you hear from other different people's point of views like, whoa.
Like it's good and bad.
It's good and bad moments.
So what's your good and bad moment on like being the only child for you being on your mother's side?
When she gone, I basically on my own house.
The bad.
I get to be by the top two around like not like I'm sad type shit like, but just to talk to.
So do y'all ever think that y'all wish y'all had siblings?
Like, do you ever wish your mother's might have had more siblings down the line?
Or like, no, you could be an only sibling.
To be honest, I'm a good not having siblings.
However, I love little girls.
So if I was to have a little sister, I feel like I would love that.
But like not close to the end.
Like I'm going to be able to tell her what to do.
We know fight after having sex.
Like I'm going to be like 12 when she was born.
And like we go from there.
I would love to be a big sister.
And then like I don't mess with my father like that.
And it's like, I feel like if he had kids, I would try to be around them.
But like since I was in the room him, I don't see him.
That's understanding.
How about you?
How would you feel if your mom was to have children down the line by you being, you know,
from you being an older child, would you want your mom to have children?
Or you just wanted to be the only child period for her?
I'd rather than all my siblings and us having the same parents and start up with you yourself.
Why is that?
Because I think it's because I ain't allowed to grow up.
I just always want the Disney Channel experience to have and I'm also used to have like three brothers and two sisters.
I got them in seven of them.
We just don't live with each other.
Yeah.
Like the guys we type to.
That's not true.
So let's get into it.
Another question involving our childhood.
How do y'all think that your childhood has impact your as an adult now, you know, going to school, working,
you know, trying to do things different that your parents have done?
So me personally, my mom, she would always been like a real, what's the word?
She always been really hardworking.
So me seeing it and me being hardworking, you literally a reflection of your parents.
So like, I saw her go to nursing school and stuff like that when I was like eight, I think that's when she graduated.
So I think it's like, okay, I can go to school and do all this and that too.
And she wanted me to be a nurse like real baby.
I might be a nurse because blood is itching.
Yeah.
I don't know.
I feel like, I don't know.
You can say.
And I'll pick you back off for you.
I'm going to have a few more time.
The question was, how did your childhood affect you as an adult?
Like, do you think it effect you in a good way, bad way?
And then like, is there anything that you see different?
Why is that?
Because I was really like, if you really know me, you know, my own real narrative type shit.
I was like in like middle school and like say everybody, you know, the games, time we sleep.
I'd be watching like a space video like that you were watching class, but like that was my entertainment.
So basically anything that's not mad, a lot of shit I already know, like in my history class now,
how the shit that I learned, I learned like when I was like in middle school, in college, I still know.
So it made me smarter because I was like, I was in the dumpster and bad because it took me until like 12th grade to learn how to be social.
That's.
Speaking about that, how do y'all think your social life is versus when you were a child versus to like now, like be like 2021, 22 years old?
Oh, now?
I said crazy now.
I ain't lying.
I ain't even talking to you in high school with me.
So yeah.
And how do you think it's different now versus from your childhood up until now?
Was it good that you're social now or was like bad, especially when you go to college to go to more than state?
So let us know.
It's good now because I always been finding so.
Don't be just around. Why do you make people more people have more than my entire shit?
So I think it's good.
What was I going to question? How is it bad?
It's bad because niggas always want to be outside.
I don't even know.
You're looking at my account.
It'd be like six shit spending and niggas talking about constant money.
Yeah.
Yeah, sometimes.
Oh, and niggas always moving up my week.
They're never mad at me.
Dang.
Dang. You ever told them that?
How they felt about that? They wanted to fight or something like that.
How do you usually, when you're fighting, you don't want to share anything?
Right. I bought it. Get together.
And I would be like, not many people.
People don't deal with it.
I really didn't even show them.
I'd just say if I flip them off side, they'll go by faster.
Because you're not. It's like, usually you buy yourself.
Yeah.
They go by faster. That's the way to play.
Unless if I invite you, I'd be like, all right, let's chill. Let you know.
Roll when I'm drinking stuff. Okay, cool.
But if not, no.
So Nia, how did your childhood put a good or a bad impact on YouTube
as you're being older now and working?
I already answered that. You want me to talk about my social life right?
Yeah, your social life.
So for me, I've always been like a natural leader.
You can't tell me to do something and I don't want to do it.
I'm just not going to do it.
But something that I've always heard, even as a child is,
when I first met you, I thought you was going to be mean.
But you're so sweet.
And I didn't say it all the time.
Even the other day when I was at work, they was doing the activity with the kids
and it was like saying a nice thing about everybody around you.
And so she did one for me for an example of them.
And she basically said you don't look the way you act.
You know what? You're mean. You seem like you would be a mean girl.
And I get that a lot.
Did that ever affect you as a child?
Absolutely not. Because I felt like when people think you're a mean girl,
they think you're pretty or they think you're attractive.
So in the back of my head, I get what you're saying, but it's a compliment.
You think of that girl in real life and you think I'm going to treat you bad
because of that and I won't.
So that's why I'm here.
But another thing that you're not always going to get,
is people that's going to give you a chance because you look mean.
So I also have girls that look at me like, oh, she thinks she's all that
and then they just decide to distance themselves.
And that's something I had to deal with my whole life as well.
But like, who cares?
And it's going to do me and surround myself with people that want to be around me.
I'm a bad, bad, mean.
But I'm bad at what I eat.
Here we go!
Don't throw my teeth up.
Don't like eat up like that.
Okay.
So the next question.
That hit the spot because I felt like that too.
Growing up, even beyond, I was quiet as a mouse in middle school.
For me to be social, it just, it happened out of nowhere.
You know, like, you know, when people look at you, they're like,
oh, they don't want nothing to do with you.
Bullying, people don't understand.
Bullying can really rub off on a person bad.
Especially if you don't know them.
Always tell people, don't judge a book by its cover unless you ain't had the chance
to sit down and read that book to get to know them.
And if you don't like it, then shut it and just leave it the hell alone.
You know?
So with that being said, when it came to compliments as a child versus now,
how did y'all feel about it?
Like, you know, when your child, people used to give you compliments,
and now when you get older, like, hmm, but you know,
do it ever like wander to you, like, is that a good or bad comment?
For me personally, no.
My whole life, my mom would be telling me I'm pretty.
So if somebody told me I'm pretty, I'd be like, thank you, I'll read it.
It would just be that simple for me.
Compliments are cool, but I don't know.
They just don't phase me.
I'm just like, thank you.
I'm glad you told me that you think I look nice with that.
I don't know.
I feel like compliments, that's not about appearance.
I always know what you're doing.
You don't need to tell me that.
I like when people tell me I like your energy.
I like how you do this.
I like how you do that.
I like stuff like that.
That's what I'm saying.
Yeah.
How about you, Deon?
I live two lives, for a friend.
I ain't a lot to you.
I didn't get compliments.
I was like, yeah.
I was like, why is that?
Bro, you've seen it back then.
I was like, baby.
I was just like, oh, wait, I ain't nothing.
I ain't a lot.
So I ended up coming back then, but now it's weird because people be calling me.
I ain't a lot.
I feel like it's probably like at least like a three a month.
Something like that.
I don't know.
I had some oil, they tell me, some handsome young man, my dog, I like that.
So now it feels weird because I'm not used to it.
But do you like the attention?
I don't know.
I like the attention.
Do you like the attention?
It doesn't really faze me.
I don't dislike it.
It's like, thank you.
And I keep it moving.
Okay.
Now, speaking about the comments, when it comes to you, Naya, when it comes to men, how
do you feel about it?
And then for you, Deon, when it comes from women, like, how does the compliments rub off?
Like it's like, okay, thank you.
I was like, what the hell?
It depends on who, like, what genre of men we talking about.
This from my age, like early on, I was walking to the library and like the boy was like,
they're pretty, like, do I appreciate them?
But like, if it's an old man looking like he owns a new library, people look good today.
You started, right?
Get away.
But I also know that I appreciate it when it comes from women, if anything.
I don't know, like, I feel like boys, they boys are the invidious.
I don't want to say good-up, they want to say to get your attention.
I feel like after a girl that, you know, they just generally want to compliment you.
I always loved it.
I support it.
Same.
How about you, Deon?
Oh, females, man, long as she don't, long as she don't, like, she don't want to be my sister,
it doesn't matter, man.
And not open up to my grandmother, yeah.
It's always like, between like 20 and like 45.
Okay.
What's the craziest compliment?
What's the craziest compliment you ever got?
I don't have one.
I'm not gonna say I'm crazy, man.
No.
I wouldn't say it was crazy, but it just rubbed me the wrong way.
So my stepdad, he's like the, I don't even know what his title is, but basically he make airplane parts.
That's what he went to school for.
And they had this little thing where you invite your family and it's like a cookout type thing.
It was like a crepe, that's whatever.
So I walked over to the directs for getting me in my little cousin, like a priest friend.
This white lady came up to me, felt my braids and said, I love the way you look, bitch.
What you mean you love the way I look?
Me too.
Don't be touching me.
And I just looked at her because I was younger.
So I wasn't as, I was outspoken, but not as outspoken as I am now because I wasn't an adult.
I didn't want to be this just about that.
And I am like, I'm not as white lady, they just touched my brain.
Like don't touch my hair.
Please don't touch my hair.
And like you didn't give me a compliment. Like if she would have been like, I like to have your braids look the same.
Like I would have been like, okay, thank you.
And got my free slender walk away.
She touched my hair, polished my second.
And she walked away like she didn't just touch me and evade my personal space lady.
I can't know you.
Yeah.
I feel like the craziest compliment I ever got by being older is a grown man telling me I look, a grown man told me I look healthy.
What?
What is this?
You look fertile.
That's weird.
What?
I mean, you actually look healthy.
I mean, I don't, and I was, and y'all know I work at Finish Line.
So it was like, oh, so this was recently?
Yeah. Like what do you mean?
I look healthy.
I'm not saying I'm fat.
Like I be saying that like, I know I look fat, but healthy.
I don't know the terminology and it didn't like affect me.
Whatever you like.
I like to look that up.
I like that. I mean, he was like healthy, but I say like the compliments I had that versus a kid versus now is just like, it's crazy.
It is not like not crazy, crazy.
It's like people's thoughts are really like, whoa, you know, especially for females, you would be like, whoa, wait a minute.
I like you said, I prefer for another female to give me a compliment because I feel better, you know, is empowerment versus sometimes a man give me a compliment.
And you know, you don't want it.
Oh, give me your parents.
You want it.
Hey, you know, I see you on the corner of my eyes.
Like, I tried to school like, try to play it off, but I couldn't.
But like getting compliments versus, I feel like this, if we're not cool, if you're not like my homeboy, something, they wouldn't like really like, but you're a stranger.
Like the way you saying it, it give off like, wait a minute, what you trying to think what you getting at that makes sense.
So that's going into childhood when it comes to academics. How do y'all feel from we all a little when it came to academic versus from now by us being in college.
Like, how did that make you feel we use a child and can academic versus now grown like how do y'all operate with the academics.
So when I was younger, my mom is really, really, really came to like my education.
If I had sight words, whatever, I had a spelling quiz coming up, like she would make songs out of my words and stuff like that.
Or like, to this day, I will not ask my mother to help in man.
I love my mother, but the way she made me cry when I need to help with long division.
That's another story though.
But yeah, she was real hands on, but as I got older, she wasn't as hands on because she was raising me. She already instilled in me like what you supposed to do when they came to school.
And like, I always got good grades.
My old life, like I used to cry when I got to see, but that's how I was.
So like now that I'm in college is like, I know C still get degrees, however, I want to do that.
But like, if I don't and I just get to see, I'm not as hard on myself because college be hard and I got to go to work and do other things and other things.
But like, I don't know.
She raised me to always put school first and make sure I make decent grades.
So like that's just how I am.
Like I'll make sure I get that essay in.
I'll make sure all of my stuff is in all the time.
And if not, I'm gonna make sure I do it the next day just to make sure everything is good and that I'm not failing in places.
That's not my biggest fear is to fail.
How about you, Deon?
I learned how to do just the right amount of work in high school just to not fail.
So if it was only a class I like, like English or law, have an A or B, if it was math, I'll have a D or a C and be happy with it.
So.
So you can be like that.
I mean, as long as you're passing.
Mm-hmm.
So how about now, about we being in our 20s and stuff and we on our own.
How has keeping up with academics and living your life affect you as well?
It's easy.
Except for nights when I be letting my hormones stay up and I go to the gym.
Maybe it's just show like that.
So you be like procrastinating.
Yes.
And it's pretty much.
I do want to balance my life with my school life because in town I care about lifting more, I care about school, in town I care about school and I care about lifting.
So it's been back and forth.
It be like that.
Speaking about that, how do y'all feel about this semester?
I'm ready to be over.
Yeah, I'm ready for it to be over.
This semester was a new challenge and for me.
I'm a procrastinator and you had those professors that don't care when you're training, working long, and I was like the manager then.
But at the same time, I'm in the back of my head like oh my God, I got all that work to do.
I'm still not going to do it because my professor ain't staying there.
That was me last week.
I was like I'm getting sick of worrying about this work I do.
I just heard that man did it all.
And it don't be hard work.
It's just like I don't have to do it right now so I do it.
I'm a real bad procrastinator.
But when somebody says you have to do this by this power, I make sure I do it.
But if there's some space for me not to do it when I'm supposed to do it, I'm taking it.
What was the question?
How's the semester treating you?
How do you feel about it?
You said you wanted to be over, but how's it treating you?
That's not even going to be.
I'm not going to be in the next semester.
So how do y'all feel by, how do y'all feel as being a student at Morgan?
Because like Deon is your first year in Ohio.
This is your last year.
So how do y'all feel about it?
So to be honest, like I like Morgan.
It's a cool place to be.
But like getting into Morgan and like trying to find the right people to tell you what to do is it can get real frustrated.
I probably would have graduated by new head.
I talked to the right people like when I first came, I wasn't supposed to come here.
I was supposed to go to God.
So and then once I changed my mind, I was like, okay, you got to do all this stuff.
I'm like, all right, so I get to a advisor.
The advisor basically told me, it's no classes for you.
You might as well wait until the spring semester.
I was like, dang.
So what they told me I was good to start for as I can't start until the spring semester.
And then when the spring semester came in, I had to reenroll, get re-accepted into Morgan.
Yeah, it was like a bunch of stuff because I wasn't talking to the right people.
And I'm like, cool, I want to be a social worker.
I should have did.
But I didn't now change my major to apply for liberal studies and I would have been out of here like clockwork because I came in with my social studies degree from high school.
So I but like overall, like my experiences like with the professors and stuff like that has been good, especially what was her name?
Dr. Thurman.
She, I think was about an hour, five, at least, to be a social worker page and not graduate until like a whole year or something.
She had out the doctor's early.
She was good, Dr. Green.
She was another good professor.
And like the professors that I had so far, at least they had empathy for their students.
I know some like don't, but like most of them that I have like they care and they want to make sure you're good outside of like the academic, but you're mostly there and able to do your work.
So yeah.
This has been cool because for somebody that put me in class so I cheated on my math final.
I'm not playing.
I cheated on my math final.
I passed my other ones because it was easy.
So I basically got in with no hard work to do.
I'll head past town now basically I got in the Morgan.
And passing, I'm getting my major next semester.
Period.
Everything went well.
Which major?
It's going to be cybersecurity.
Oh yeah, because you did change it.
I do hate this fucking campus because it's like, hey, this girl is in a water park.
She closed her bag there a while ago for no reason.
I almost hit the security guard to the other day in my car.
She jumped in front of my car.
Then why is it always water on the floor and the fucking down the hall?
I almost fell like fucking like ten times a semester.
You don't be no stress.
That shit is alarming.
What else?
I don't know.
Not all right.
Just like ghetto shit on this campus.
That's the only one I know.
Okay.
Tell us a little bit more, Dionne, about how it is to be a student on campus and tell
us now how it doesn't feel to be a student off campus.
On campus?
Yeah, because you live on campus.
I felt like if I was more social, it'd be even more fun, but it's cool because I mean,
it felt like you're not living at home, but I was ten minutes away from when I'm fucking
tired of living on that hard ass medicine on the phone.
I go home.
I just sit and I just go home.
But on campus, it's cool.
I could definitely see how I feel like something's all you want in one type of shit.
Like they want to invite.
I just be going to class, getting new grades, hotbox my car, and I go home.
Makes sense.
For me, I feel like if I was to be here.
He's been helping people come.
I'm sorry.
I was like, oh shit, what did I do?
But for me, I feel like if I was to stay on campus, it would be like going one on one
for me.
I'm a social butterfly, so I feel like if I had more opportunities to be on campus and
to be around other students, not in a classroom, but you can't do much when you're in a classroom.
Luckily for us, we had to do a little group work thing.
That's how I got to know you.
But if it wasn't for that, I probably would have saw you in class and laughed at me.
Probably would never speak, spoken again.
And that's how it been for a lot of the friends that I made here on campus.
It was the teachers that made group work.
Okay, that's how I made my friends.
But other than that, I don't really know anybody on campus.
I feel like a lot of it has to do with me not living on campus.
Because a lot of stuff happened at night, and I'm like, okay, I'm not going to travel
at night, and I'm going to go home and come back and all that.
And then like, as my classes is over, there's no reason for me to still be here.
If I'm not with you with the friends that I had, I'm like, alright, I'm going to go home now.
I'm going to work or something.
So yeah.
It's also a good place if you were studying.
Anybody that's studying listening to...
Hey!
Oh, I'm not sure.
Yo!
If you be smoking with me, or if I was walking, sometimes I would smoke and I would lift the bridge.
I would have to face this, and I would literally...
But it's a cool place to be.
I'm not playing.
Yeah, I would say like, when I transferred here, y'all, I'm saying things like,
now you said my first like...
Who's in here?
I called myself.
See, I just said, I seen you, you know, I called myself.
When I first came here, I went to CCBC, or S6.
I got my degree from them and straight came here.
When I was at S6, same thing, if I had go to school...
Oh my God!
You went there?
I felt like I was in the music room.
Oh my God!
So, D-O, I'm not paying too.
So I went there.
Same thing.
I barely didn't know nobody.
Like, the only person I knew was D-On.
And like, we went during the pandemic.
So it was like, we didn't, you know...
I was on Fortnite in my program every day.
I did not go to class.
She had mad W's.
What is a W?
Withdrawal.
Oh, what?
Oh, double...
Oh, I'm being taken into academic...
Withdrawal, but I ain't going to lie though.
Big shout out to D-On, because he tried again.
I know that's right.
But you hear that?
You're here at university though.
So like, you did your thing.
Right, big shout out to you.
There you go.
We supported you.
Y'all know I'm real big on support when it comes to my friends.
I'm a big fan of your university, academics.
Because this shit is not easy.
I'm telling y'all, it's not easy.
And that's why I say like, when it comes to our childhood,
you know, back then you had your mother, your father,
whoever, your guardian, whoever right there,
helping you lead in your hand.
But when you get older, it's like, shit, it's on you.
The choices you made is on you, baby.
Because it's like, this is your future now.
It's not your mother, your father, your guardian's future.
They did what they can to prepare you for your future.
But then it's like, what do you want to do?
And like, when we were growing up,
I know that question, like, which one be when you grow up?
That shit used to get on my nerves sometimes.
Like, when I was like, I'm gonna say,
when I graduated out of middle school,
or out of high school, it was like, what the fuck?
Like, so tell me the questions that you used to like.
Yeah, question.
Trit, what's up?
Do you still be thinking what you want to be when you grow up?
I felt like I finally know what I want to be
right after I had graduated from CCPC,
which is kind of crazy.
Because like, y'all know, at times,
it's like, y'all want to step in so many journeys.
Like, you know, you want to do this, you want to do that,
you want to do this.
I remember like, when I was little, I said,
I want to be a teacher.
I said, oh, I want to be a fashion designer,
because I used to dress up.
Then I'm like, I can't draw for shit.
So then I was like, I was still on the term,
I want to be a teacher.
Then I remember I was in the middle school,
I said, I want to be a fighter.
I want to be like, Ron DeRiong-y type.
And I was like, nah.
And then I want to be a lawyer.
But then, you know, during the pandemic,
like, a lot of things had crumbled down.
But I always told myself, I wanted to help children
in social work when I got to learn about that stuff.
I was like, whoa.
And then it was even, it was even counseling or social work.
CCBC helped me get a certification within human behaviors.
So that was one thing I say to help.
Then when I came here,
then my research was I was like, do I want to go to UB?
Or do I want to go to Oregon?
You know what I mean?
You must be like saying, like,
you should have me a fucking career and education.
Like, God damn, you talking about men.
Like, you know what I mean?
That's a good thing.
I appreciate it.
Because I mean, when we say earlier, we just, yeah.
I felt the question changed me.
It's not what I want to be when I grow up.
It's what I want to do with my life.
Get into that.
Get diving in that.
I want to hear it.
I don't want to look forward to a job.
And I just die.
For me to change what I want to do with my life
is now a big excuse me.
I'm in college because I'm going to be able to be financially free.
So I can do my passion, like bodybuilding and powerlifting.
That's what I want to do with my life.
Not before to a degree, a job, and then I die.
No.
I want to be a number one powerlifting and number one bodybuilder.
And then I'm going to be with Dianne.
I try this for me.
So why is that?
Like, what made you...
Are you strong?
Yeah.
I'm trying to get that lift fee of 415 pounds.
I might go for 435 tonight depending on my back.
I'm going to get up on that.
Talk that?
Yeah.
So why?
Okay.
So Naya, how do you feel?
Like, what was the...
So did your mind change when you got older?
You know, when you...
Versus when you were little, like, did the career change?
I'm going to tell them I don't want to stay the same.
I went from wanting to be the president.
Oh, did I want to be a lawyer?
I feel like it.
But so the president of course...
I mean, I thought I could still be the president,
but that's not really my interest.
I was just going to say that they don't want to be a lawyer.
I could argue somebody there.
However, I felt like the way I am, I'm a very emotional person.
That's what made me feel so hard.
So like, are you in...
In trying to prove a point all the time?
I feel like it would have, you know, taken a toll on me.
But like, I can argue somebody there with any topic.
I'm real talented when it comes to that.
You can't tell me nothing.
But like, I feel like it would have had a toll on me eventually.
Then from Naya, I went to nursing because like I said,
my mom wanted me to be a nurse.
I'm like, he's touching people body fluids.
Yeah.
And also the school is hard.
I'm not as fine as girl at the earth sign.
It's not anything about nothing.
Because I don't know.
So I'm like, I want to help people.
I want to help people.
I'm thinking therapists.
Therapists just talk to people.
So she work.
They talk to people, but they give them the resources too.
So I'm like, alright, so she work.
And that is the sense, I've been wanting to be a social worker.
A social worker saying, I don't even know.
I think since I love my spray and I just stop with it.
Yeah.
That's big.
Yeah.
That's real big.
So Dior, it didn't affect you as a child.
Like you never want to be something that it turned differently when you got older.
I wanted to be a lawyer, but I should have acted too much.
I had to pant down.
I feel like, yeah.
I took a law class.
It was very interesting.
We had to look at different cases and then, you know what a case brief is?
Yeah.
We had to write those.
That's literally what the class consists of.
And it was really interesting.
It was in some grades.
Big shout out to Mick D's.
Because I feel like when I went to Murpho, he was the only reason why I wanted to be a lawyer
and the way he did it.
But then like the pandemic, like Dior said.
You love to be a lawyer?
Yeah.
What?
Tell him.
I know you remember.
Man, we want to wait for that shoot.
I know.
He's a movie called Lincoln Lawyer about a lawyer that drove a Lincoln.
And he was just that nigga in that movie.
And I was like, I don't try to be like that.
He was.
That was the biggest lawyer reason why I wanted to be a lawyer.
You like that.
Why do you want to be a lawyer, Mariah?
I like to argue with people and I felt like I was good at it.
What type of lawyer would you be though?
I never got so far into that.
But now that I'm thinking about it, because when I was saying this, I was probably just
entering high school.
But now that I'm thinking about it, I feel like I would, I don't know.
I will always want to be in the right spot.
So I feel like, I don't know how that would go.
Like they got a lawyer for children and something.
Family.
Yeah, something like that.
Something like that.
Because I will always want to be in the right spot.
I would never want to have to be a lawyer.
I feel like that's something that doesn't come with that.
And then I'm saying, so I feel like if I'm defending the right group of people, I feel like it's
no wrong.
He wanted to be the deep, the, uh, yeah.
That's fair.
I'm real based on morals.
So like if I feel like you're wrong and you deserve to go to jail, I couldn't trust myself
to be a lawyer.
You better go find somebody else.
You got your like your plaintiff and then the deep.
Yeah.
So you'd be like plaintiff side.
Yeah.
You gotta go find somebody else.
You said that you want me to defend you.
Right.
You said that and killed that lady.
Mom, you want me to defend you.
And it's crazy because like it's people out here that sacrificed their life to do these
things.
Even with social work.
And it's crazy because it's like, wow, but somebody has to be there.
Somebody got to be there.
It just won't be me.
No.
For a lawyer, I had a whole bunch of like ideas.
I wanted to be an entertainment lawyer, work for the NBA.
Then I was like, okay, I want to be a family lawyer.
Then what was the other one?
It was another one.
Oh, a criminal lawyer.
But I was like, no, I'm from Baltimore.
I ain't.
No.
I wanted to be like, what's her name, the one that they got her up there now on the news.
Poor thing.
I forgot her name.
She helped with the Freddie Gray case.
No.
I forgot her name that fast, y'all.
She helped Freddie Gray and now they on the news saying that she, she went to jail for
a fraud and stuff.
I forgot her name.
We're going to tip on my tongue, but I'll come back to it.
Okay.
So what's another question?
Because we still tap it into our childhood.
Well, what do y'all want to talk about?
How does that impact your childhood or something?
Oh, it was one question I didn't get a chance to answer.
I think it was something that you got X a lot growing up that used to be.
Yeah.
And I think that's what I mean.
It's like when outside people outside of like, you know, my mom, my grandmother, my aunt,
people that raised me, people that actually care about my well-being when they would just
ask us to be nosy.
They want an extra typical questions like, oh, how's school going?
You know, things like that.
Oh, wait, your little boyfriend that used to get on my nerves so bad.
Like you just trying to get in my business so you can judge me.
Like please leave me alone.
Ask me about something that matters.
Like I see you in years and that's your first question for me.
Like, my uncle directed this is bad.
I just be looking at him and walk away.
Who are you to be asking me that?
Or they ask me about like, if I'm having sex or stuff like that.
Like, who are you to, like, you're not my doctor, you're not my mom.
And I just be looking at my mom some sideways when she asks.
I'm like, get away from me.
As an adult.
Yeah.
Now let's get into it.
When it comes to relationships or talking to people, how do y'all feel about that?
Like, as an adult, when it comes to even one inspired relationship and talking to people,
do you want people to know what's going on or you want to keep it to yourself?
Or how long does it take for you to even tell people like, look, yeah,
I'm in a relationship on talking to somebody.
So what depends if it's brought up?
Like if I was to get into a relationship with somebody yesterday and I saw you today,
if it didn't come up, I probably wouldn't tell you, but it was like,
if we was talking to you, I probably tell you, oh yeah, I thought this song was so,
it don't be like no secret for me or nothing, but like if it don't come up,
I'm not just going to come out and tell you.
Now let's do something big like something I've already told you.
Yeah.
And then like who let me update her on that.
But like if it's nice, like okay.
But or if like somebody tried to talk to me and of course I would have to tell them
I'm in a relationship.
Yeah.
How about you, Deon?
It depends.
I'm going to be talking to you.
That makes sense.
That's not going to hurt.
Somebody actually go out of it.
The Venn Go ahead.
That's fair.
What's your type?
Hmm.
Do I have a type?
I have a type, but like if you're attractive, you're attractive.
That doesn't mean that I'm going to endate you if you're not my type.
But I like, hmm.
I guess, I don't know.
All I get is pretty boys.
So I don't really know.
What's your definition of a pretty boy?
I like it as pretty boys, like people that's like obsessed with their hair and their appearance
and stuff like that.
Hmm.
Alright, Deon!
Hold on a minute.
Because of my actual, like how they look physically.
I guess like black, waves or lights and yeah.
Somebody that's like me, do stuff that I do.
I like, but you mean like the shot of the perfect looking person?
That's what I thought you meant like.
Yeah, like that.
Oh no, what did you talk to me about?
My personality, y'all look.
That's how I get looks.
Do y'all go off by looks or vibes?
I'm just being honest.
Or both.
The first thing they say to my eyes is she does came with waistbeats and like lock.
Hmm.
That's what I'm saying.
Interesting.
Yeah.
We actually like the perfect one, like the one like the one I got is like an ideal.
You know I ain't right with the ideal person, but that's probably the ideal version.
My ideal is straight songs, but that's not going to happen.
I'm just saying that somebody that's like leaves my nose out because I don't like you know what?
I sometimes like around me and keep telling me you don't think you should stop, but you
think you can like that will get in my nerves.
Because I'm productive strong, but if I had to mind around me, I got a little nerves about
it, I wouldn't immediately just, you know what I'm going to speak to you because I'm like
eww, get in my nerves like that.
That makes sense.
So somebody that's like stuff that I like, because I hate being around somebody that don't
like my hobby.
Hmm.
So he wants somebody like you.
Yeah.
So would you like somebody like you and I?
My hobbies are very feminine.
If they enjoy dancing and working with children, then sure.
I mean, to be honest, I don't really, when I'm in a relationship, when I'm interested
in somebody, if their, their hobbies I would try to take interest in it.
If that makes sense.
Cause like I don't expect nobody to become a dancer because I didn't, just kind of like
my only habit that I most part.
But like, hmm, hmm, that makes sense.
Me is like, it is what it is.
Disrespect what I'm doing.
Respect bro is real big.
Like respect what I'm doing because like, like Dion said, I'm not a type to tell a dude
or a guy smoking.
Doesn't you like dude, sometimes you might got to hit one with him too, you know.
But yeah, I wanted to be with somebody that's comfortable and can accept me for who I am.
Cause I don't want to change it.
And that, do y'all have it ever happened to you in life that you felt like you had to
change where you are?
This would be accepted, like when you were a kid versus now or only when it came.
If you're not accepting me for who I am, then you want to be.
Like I feel like it's a difference.
Like if it's actually something wrong, like say, I don't know, like my personality, I'm
a mean girl, something like that.
Of course I don't want somebody to tell me I don't know.
Yeah, you need to say it like that or something like that.
Like if I'm just being mean, you don't like that, like pink or like you don't like that
I wear my hair and something like that, then you can even not tell me how I'm supposed to be.
How about you Dionne?
It's different from a man's perspective.
What's the biggest question?
Growing up, but you ever felt like you had to change who you are to be accepted versus now?
Oh yeah, I had no idea about music.
Really?
How do you think you would?
Like rock, I like metal sometimes.
There's a lot of white people that would get classified as.
But then once I got in high school, I was like, I don't care now.
And then I realized that I like back then, it's trendy now.
Versus?
I mean, I think it's so cool.
I don't know if Niggas give my ass for that.
Everybody thinks it's cool like white people give their ass for that.
Yeah, because they want Instagram now.
Don't they see that ticket they got on Instagram?
That sticker on Instagram?
Oh, that's my favorite.
I always loved me something like, I always had like a real diverse, like,
a real diverse taste of music.
It didn't matter if it sound good to me, I'm not listening to it.
I don't care who or where I'm listening to it.
Like if I was to put my music on shuffle right now, you'd have to be like,
what the hell she be listening to?
Like I did not be here.
I always been like that though.
Oh, that's the same thing for me.
Like one day I probably passed something, saw one day it's right from somewhere.
You know, that's the thing.
Speaking about that, do y'all feel comfortable with the person that y'all are today versus
what you were when you were a kid?
Yeah, I feel like 22 year old me would be best friend of a 12, 15 year old me.
And why is that?
Because he would, I think none of me would think I'm just like that.
He would think I'm so fucking cool.
I agree.
I feel like my youngest though, but love the person I am right now.
Mm-hmm.
If there would be something that y'all would like to tell your old self,
what would it be?
She might not be as old.
What?
She might not be as old.
I don't think so.
I'm gonna notice this.
This is all cut.
Y'all already know how this is.
And we gonna can't miss what it seems like.
Yeah, y'all be surprised.
Yeah, I think you have been outside that window.
What?
Oh my God.
The walls, any given second.
As long as they don't start shooting, it would be good.
Yeah, because I'm getting the hell out of it.
I'm ducking and rolling.
I'm getting the hell out of here.
I'm sorry.
Sorry.
It's still boring more than the day.
Okay.
If there was something that you would like to tell your childhood self,
what would it be?
Or a few things, whatever.
What is something you would tell your old self?
I think about this question often and sometimes I would like,
I don't know, because what if what I tell them changes,
like the outcome of how I'm, you know what I'm saying?
That's, yeah.
Because I feel like everything happens for a reason.
So maybe it was certain things that I didn't need to know at that moment.
So that they can live and I feel like everything happens.
You know, you need certain things for character development and things of that nature.
You're not wrong about that one.
How about you, Dionne?
Or it's like the same?
How about telling them to keep letting them stuff that you like?
Yeah, it would probably be like,
something like, you're beautiful, just keep doing something like that.
I probably wouldn't try to tell them nothing that's going to happen.
I'll try to do this and that and anything like that.
I just felt like.
I can't not, I would bully my young self a little bit, but I would tell them that 15, I would.
Oh my God.
I mean, I feel like that's understandable.
I feel like that wouldn't hurt enough, and especially if that's your interest now.
You want to lift it.
Speaking about that, your interest, Dionne, you talk a lot about lifting.
Give us some insight on how that is.
What you mean, like, how is it like?
Why you love it so much?
What made you do it?
How does it help you and things like that?
I feel like a lot of, I think eggs, a lot of lifters, they always had a story when they
was at their lowest point in their life, and then that's where they gave most of that strength from.
So I would say that's, that's probably the reason.
I don't know, I just wanted to get, I was always really weak and I wanted to be strong.
So I just got up and I just wanted to go get strong.
How long you been doing this?
It's been three years.
And that's commitment right there.
I appreciate it.
I respect it and appreciate it.
I've been probably stuck competing in four or five more years.
26, 27.
Okay.
Around the fifth.
Does that help you mentally and physically?
Not even just physically.
How does it help you mentally?
I feel like mentally, I feel like my mind has gone through check.
It's like I feel like year one and year two and year three, whereas in my mind there's different people.
I can like bookmark it in my mind, like how I used to think, you know, I used to be.
And I think because I grew up with my father in health, it took me out to be a man, I guess.
I think so.
Got a lot of the things I do now, like if I'm doing homework or if something's going on, I'm like, yeah, this is hard,
but it ain't as hard as it's lifting through.
I can do like something else.
Okay.
So that's how I think.
Like, yeah, this, like I was just doing like regular stuff.
I'm like, I'm just like doing it, but like, it ain't as hard as doing what you do on the gym.
So it makes, it makes regular life easy.
Mm-hmm.
Yeah.
I respect that.
So Nya, you talked a lot about dancing.
Same thing, like how does that impact you?
It impacts you physically, but how did it impact you mentally and how long you've been doing it and things like that?
I've been dancing since I was in middle school.
I don't know which age, what age exactly, but it's like an outlet for me.
Mm-hmm.
Like, I'm not the type of person to like express myself if something is going wrong.
You have to ask me, what's wrong?
Well, are you okay?
Like, I don't mess up and say it, not let's be cool like that.
Mm-hmm.
Like even men, like I don't be wanting to put my burdens on other people.
And I used to be like real heavy on the surgical dance.
That's like praise dancing when you dance the gospel music.
And that was like a real outlet for me, like praise in God.
And just like, you know, without them feeling just letting it out with my moves and like whatever, I decided to do the dance.
Mm-hmm.
And not only that, it helps me connect to like little girls younger than me.
You know, I'm all about sisterhood and what makes me want to stuff like that.
So it is.
It ties into a lot of things.
When it comes to your talents, I'm gonna say talents, do y'all want to go bigger on it like, you know, bodybuilding?
Do you want to have like your own session, studio type?
Do you want to have your own studio when it comes to dancing?
Like, do y'all see like some type of future business plan within what y'all do that makes you happy?
If my knees don't give out and I had to settle on a pound of deadlift and I went first place in a powerlifting contest and a bodybuilding contest,
I'll probably go over to my home proper gym.
Not no phony ass, like I'm in like a grudge gym, like where at?
You gotta at least be living like 200 something pounds even, come to the front door.
Oh, wow!
They call it hardcore gyms.
Yeah, I would say that's hardcore and I'm, I'm, I respect it because like, you know, it is like people are really, really strong on bodybuilding.
It is especially even just get out there to even get to do certain stuff.
I'm trying to change the industry because right now it's mainly about not how strong you can be naturally,
but how many steps you can take without dying first.
So a lot of young people when they get into it, they even transfer you in and they want steroids.
Damn.
It takes years of your life.
Good.
So I would try to promote being, me I couldn't talk about a lot, try to promote being natural.
Do what you can with your genetics, give you basically.
I just try to mean we have one steroids and then I'm down at like 30.
That's understandable.
Yeah.
How about you Nia?
So for me, dancing has always been just a hobby.
But however, Monday my mom was talking, me and my mom was talking, she was like, if you was to like hit the ladder and got like a bunch of money right now,
what would you do with it?
And I said, I would open up a rec center.
But now that you like mentioned dancing and like what I would do with it, I could probably make it like a little dance class for girls or whatever.
Cause like right now I'm into it.
It's called the Charm School Project for Girls and like we mentor through dance.
Like we teach them dance today, we like will show cases and stuff like that.
And I would probably do something like that if I ever had to opportunity to.
But it's not nothing like I'm like, yeah, I'm gonna do that.
And right now it's going to be a social worker.
I respect it.
So another question I have is what is your drive in life?
Like what is your motivation and key to everything that you're doing in life?
Not again, two goes in details.
I'm like telling you everything.
You're respecting?
2020 and 2021 is what makes me get up every single day.
So I'm gonna say.
And why is that?
You did a little bit.
It was the worst part.
So probably, I'm not gonna say the worst part, I'm only 22 so I still got to watch that shit that go through.
But so far it was probably the worst years of my life.
And those, those years make me get up every day.
Cause of the pandemic?
No, not the pandemic.
Just personal life and stuff like that.
I respect it.
I only know I can't tell you it's too much.
Yeah.
And it's okay.
It's okay.
To be honest, I don't even know.
I just be getting up like, we gotta do something productive and good so we can be good in the future.
And I'm like, alright.
I don't know.
I guess to make my mother proud, that would be cool.
I don't know.
I just, I was just raised to be a certain way.
So I guess that's just what I'm doing.
I don't know.
That's a good question.
I feel like I should have like a more meaningful answer to that.
It's okay though, cause that's how we don't.
I feel like I'm doing what I'm supposed to be doing.
Like if I was doing anything else, I would probably feel like a bum.
And if I wasn't in school and if I didn't hit my job and like, you know, doing something productive,
I probably wouldn't be satisfied with my life.
And that's some motivation too.
I respect it.
Same here.
It's like, I think what motivated me is like grief.
You know, like sometimes when you lose people in your life, that grief just, it turns you up.
Like I lost my uncle at 12 and that really like, fucked me up to the point where like,
you know, I've lost my grandparents too, but it was like, I was so young.
So it did mess it up too as I was older.
Like, you know, you don't get that experience and stuff and then lost my grandfather.
And you know, I felt like grief helped me out a little bit too.
And then also remembering too, like you the oldest, you got, you got two young people.
Looking at you.
So it's like, it's no time.
Like we want, we're going to have our fucked up moments where it's like, you can't be fucking
up every time.
Cause like you have to make sure that you're setting an example, you know, so I respect that.
Another question is when it comes to this lifestyle of college, we back, whoo, from
Santa Monica attack, you're all done cutting it just, whoo.
When it comes to this lifestyle of being a college student, what is your pros and cons
that you would tell people when it comes to going to college period?
I had a lot of snacks.
I didn't eat them all the time.
Like I find more than I know snacks for some reason.
And finding it cool with cause it gets boring.
And then some pros is you know, your battering gets helped by getting an education.
Hopefully your degree will, you know, help you live whatever type of lifestyle you want.
And some cons, it's time to see them and they can be stressful.
Yeah.
I feel like, you know, the typical stuff people say all the time for real.
So when it comes to college.
How do y'all feel about it when it's, when y'all discussing it with your family members?
They make something super style.
Like I'm really doing that shit.
How does that make you feel though?
I don't know.
I think they don't need fun.
It don't like.
To me, what I'm doing is normal to them.
They think I'm really doing something big.
I'm just going to school.
Yeah.
I'm not a big deal.
I agree. I wouldn't say I'm the first generation technically I am because my mom, she went to community college and she became a nurse.
But like I'm the first person like to graduate from high school and go straight to college and stuff like that.
And like everybody is rooting for me for real and he just waiting for me to graduate.
Look at my look because she wants to go to more and stuff like that.
And it wasn't their role model.
Like for nobody in my family for a long time to actually, you know, did the right thing with through high school, go straight to college, graduate plan on getting your master stuff like that.
Nobody, that was nobody's plan.
So, you know, it's pressure.
But then again, it's like issuing like the little ones in my thing, like it's possible just because like we come from this doesn't mean like grid and things can't happen.
I think so.
Ah, really?
I couldn't go straight to college at high school.
But you did.
I didn't though.
You like you think you attended to.
I'm going to tell you, it was a moment and this was in 2020, I think when I was in CCB, I remember my father, my cousin, my sister, we were just smoking.
And I remember I was looking on the window and I was like, yo, I don't care what this college is doing.
Wow.
And for that.
And then that be 2020.
I basically just stopped going to class.
And then I feel like that was my year.
And I got in, I feel like I've been in this with me for different reasons.
And for that time, it was like I only care about school.
I was just rolling up.
So I care about types of 2021.
I can't keep doing this forever.
And then I started working out and working out me everything else seemed easier.
Like college is easy because I go to the gym.
I'm like, that's the only reason it's easy for me because.
So that motivates you to stay focused and to get this stuff done.
Yeah, philosophy.
Yeah, I guess if you lifted that baby elephant screen.
So yeah, so speak about motivation.
Like what motivated you to come to college?
What's that?
Naya, like seeing your mom.
To be honest, if this flowed, I didn't have no reason not to go to college.
I wasn't opposed to the idea.
It's something I'm supposed to do.
So when I'm here and I'm a, you know, finish.
I was my mom, she raised me to go to college.
I guess I know what she didn't have the pressure because like she already instilled into my mind that like the key to success is your education.
You have to take your education seriously.
And I don't have, I can have no other plane at that makes sense.
Like I didn't want to do nothing else.
I'm like, okay, in order to be what I want to be, I'm going to go to college.
So yeah.
I feel it.
Like when it comes to school period for me, it's like, it's people in my family that went and then Burley went.
So for me, like when y'all say like when they come to school at times, for me, if it's not my immediate household, you know, saying, you know, they appreciate it versus outside of family.
But it's like, I really don't care.
And it sounds harsh, but it's like, you know, who's loyal and who's not.
And that's what I had to realize growing up because like, you know, I always sell people to at times.
It's best to keep a mystery of your life, especially if you if we not dealing with each other every day.
It's like, I don't need to park broadcast everything that's going on versus like if we are.
Yeah, why not?
Because I know you're going to support me as much as to support you.
So going into support, how do y'all feel when it comes to your support system and who is in your support system?
Hmm, I got a small support system and that's okay.
Because like you said, you can't tell everybody what you got going on and all your goals and aspirations.
And like to be honest, it's the village that helped raise me.
You know, my mom, I guess my stepdad, my aunt and of course my little cousin, my friends, people that keep around, you know, we motivate each other.
You know, we got this thing going on and that's about it.
Yeah, the small group of people I can spend with friends and the family that you know, watch me grow up.
How about you, Dion?
Say, what was my name?
Your support system.
How is your support system and who is your support system?
I just bought my parents from.
And then I used my parents.
How do they support you?
She went to the Nigger Harley.
Yeah, I was good.
Can't shut me in.
How about when it come to academics?
How was your support system when it comes to your academic life?
I should have bought myself.
Really?
Yeah.
Why is that?
My father is not an academic man.
My mother, she not, my mother knows like, she's a student at school and she has medical bills and stuff like that.
But she don't know what the shit we do about her.
Yeah, I gave it.
I guess like my parents, that's in college.
I'm like, my mom, she, of course, she's the worst everything I do.
Like, you know, she give me money when I get good grades and stuff.
Yeah.
But like, I thought like, it's hard to support some, like, it's not that much you can do to support when like, it's not you doing it.
That makes sense.
Like, she ain't nobody but to come and do my work for me.
So it's really just me.
But like, I guess if I had to vent about like, I'm just so stressed out, I got my friends and things like that.
I feel like when it comes down to it, like, when it comes to supporting yourself, it's with you, like, you just got to do it.
Yeah.
Another thing I want to talk about, y'all know I'm big on that mental.
How y'all feeling mentally when it comes to everything that's going on?
If I had to read my mental from 1 to 10, it's on like a general thing, I would give it a 7 from 5.
And why is that?
I don't know. Like, I feel good right now.
Most days are good.
But like, you know, I haven't had my own stuff going on that I'm like getting pains.
I just got to have a good relationship, things like that.
And you know, sometimes that can be said, but I'm like, oh well, take things.
More so like disappointed than sad.
So that's why I say it's on my point 5.
Which is better than what it was a few weeks ago.
So privacy is everything.
I respect it.
And like school and stuff like that.
I just want to get everything done.
You know what I need?
I just want to go on a beach.
And I want to be a peanut colada.
And I want to get the waves.
And that's what I really need.
I just need a break for a second.
How about you, Deon?
I'm probably a 5.
Damn. Why is that?
Because I lost my edge forever.
You said you lost your edges?
No, my edge.
No, I'm a 1, but you beat that edge.
Like school be too busy.
I don't get to gym like everything I used to.
I used to be a lot harder on myself.
And a good way though.
I fight the grind slow down a little bit.
So I'm looking forward to want to break.
Because when I break is when the cut starts.
So up 5am outside running.
Training that I say one day.
Trying to drop like 40 pounds in 4 weeks.
And then jump back on the floor.
How do you do that?
Is this calories in calories out?
I lost my edge because I feel like when I'm in the gym now.
I've been thinking about how you wasn't here 2 days ago.
You missed 2 days.
And I'd be in my video right now.
So I could beat myself up a lot.
Because I'm not as scripted as I used to be.
I feel like it's okay though.
Because you're doing it for a good reason.
You were at school.
It's not like you just want to play video games or something.
There's something I used to do with you.
But like you're still getting it done.
You told work at the toilet though.
You'd be angry.
You wouldn't break out in the future.
But you never thought of like mapping your time out.
Like having a schedule.
Sometimes you do.
And then I get the text and things.
But you'll hop on the game.
Oh my god.
You ain't that though.
I didn't make a proper part like that.
And then I hop on the game with them.
I'm like I don't play the 2 hours.
And then that 2 hours fan is.
It go by so fast.
And I was like nah, I didn't do that.
I didn't smoke playing the game.
Now I'm going to get out.
I have a question for you.
Do you feel like smoking would interfere with your ultimate goal?
Or do you think you can do both?
And so be fine?
I found a way around that.
So after I'm done lifting, I smoke is like a reward.
Now I get to chill out.
So I'll probably go lift after I leave campus today.
So I'm not going to smoke for the next part of the week.
Did you worry about smoking?
Did you worry about something?
Yeah, but I'm good now.
I'm just like a time.
Okay, I'll have to shoot you sober up and you look okay.
I didn't sober up during this broadcast.
Oh my God.
Yeah, when I'm done lifting and I smoke, my body just be chilled.
So you don't have to get in the way of texture.
I respect that.
So, is there any questions y'all want to ask me?
Y'all like, you tell me, you know, any questions?
Break them into like you know.
Oh, I feel like it's between like, it's between like that six and seven,
probably a little bit of eight, because you know, like this semester by me being
in the by me being in the program, like by me being a social worker major period.
Thank you.
Thank you by me being in the program period and me finally like, understanding and getting
that feel of what's going on.
I say academics.
I'm there.
However, when it comes like outside life working in trying to maintain still keeping
me up.
I had I did something that a lot of people didn't know like I got help.
Like I got help.
Like I'm crazy.
Like I got a counselor.
Like it's nothing wrong with talking to a stranger and y'all build that relationship
to the point where they're able to help you and it drops off on you that people are you
able to help others.
So, yeah, because I'll say like when I started when we started this year, but this semester
I say it was cool.
But then like, you know, around homecoming and all that I was just like, I'm over it.
Like I was over it.
I'm almost at times like I'm over coming to the dad on campus.
Like if y'all don't call me anything, I don't have no drive to come up here.
Same.
It's like I don't have a drive like if I'm not here with my friends or like something
that I'm involved in like the organization on campus.
I'm involved in if it's nothing dealing with that or class.
I don't have no drive to come up here.
So I say mentally I'm like I'm where I'm at.
It's going to be hard to get like to eight, nine, ten, but that's seven and six and stuff.
Yeah.
And being, when Dion said five, that's in the middle.
So I give you that that's in the middle because at times it's like I say this, my middle
has been better because like sometimes at night I just be like over it.
Like I just be like I want to bust out crying.
But now it's like I haven't cried in a minute.
Same.
And I said that's like I haven't cried in a minute and that really changed.
Sometimes when I was like piss frustrated, I just bust out crying or like I still write
about everything like everything I do good or bad with that.
I write about it.
But like sometimes I owe like, you know, people say a good cry will help, but I haven't cried
in a minute.
And I tell people at the time, don't be afraid to get help.
And I felt like to like by us, you know, growing up in a black household, we was always told
that we don't need no therapist.
I feel like when we get older, we do because it's something like, there's some memories
and things that needs to be not patched up, but needs to be sealed so things can work
out for us mentally.
So yeah, I say like now that I'm talking to somebody has somebody to talk to stuff.
Besides my parents, I feel like more I'm feeling mentally better.
I'm not crying.
I'm not sad.
And I'm not sweating a small stuff because that was my problem.
Like things people used to say and do to me.
It used to trigger me and piss me off to the point where I want to lash out to the point
where I had to distance myself because when it came to my mental, it was like, bro, I
work two jobs.
I go to school.
I have a pocket.
I don't got time for that.
Like, you know, if we not here, like I, I, we each other, I don't want to hear it.
You know, so I just want to be surrounded by good vibes and good vibes only.
Yeah, I say like my mental like a six in a seven to and yeah, don't be afraid to get
help.
Like don't be afraid to vent to someone because you never know.
Like they could really help you out a lot.
So yeah.
Any questions?
You still give me Mario because you're like, you just asked me.
You know, oh my gosh fight you now or later.
You gonna get your Mario.
I'm still gonna get your Mario.
I told him I'm gonna get his Mario.
What do you say?
You're gonna get on Christmas like relax.
Like he just like a big key.
So is there anything else you guys want to talk about?
Oh, you're right.
A rat rat rat.
Yeah, man.
Nothing comes to mind.
It'd be like that.
You don't know.
Alrighty guys.
Okay.
Well, I think you guys so, so very much, but even have the time to sit down and divide
out with me.
I appreciate it a lot.
And I think y'all so, so much y'all.
Y'all been supporting me since it even came out.
So yeah, big shout out to y'all.
So with that being said, y'all, I think you guys also very much for hearing our raw and
very, very uncut conversation.
I wish you guys another piece of blessings.
Please stay safe out here and also please, please watch out for your surroundings because
you know, when it hit five o'clock, it gets dark.
It's hell outside because I'm looking at the window right now and it's really dark.
And I hope you guys also enjoy your holiday because it's holiday season.
I want y'all to be safe.
You know, go to the doctor, get them checked up, shots, all that good stuff.
So yes, as always, you guys will hear from me next Wednesday.
Bye.