1 00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:07,360 Hey y'all whether it's morning evening or afternoon, I'm just glad that you guys had decided to buy with me 2 00:00:07,480 --> 00:00:11,320 Yes, you're wanting only I hope by now my favorite podcast 3 00:00:13,280 --> 00:00:17,400 So y'all already know the drill whether you're on the move or on the go 4 00:00:17,400 --> 00:00:23,280 I just want y'all to sit back and relax and enjoy this episode because today 5 00:00:23,920 --> 00:00:28,280 this vibe I have it needs to be addressed and 6 00:00:28,280 --> 00:00:31,280 Of course, y'all know it's always special 7 00:00:31,680 --> 00:00:34,640 So without further ado, let's get into it 8 00:00:34,640 --> 00:00:42,480 I know this is going to be like wow you really decided to talk about this because a lot of people don't pinpoint 9 00:00:42,480 --> 00:00:44,480 or in talking about this 10 00:00:45,080 --> 00:00:51,800 So I'm gonna be the one to say it. This is for the main but mainly not for that me 11 00:00:51,800 --> 00:00:54,880 I know y'all probably like what was something? 12 00:00:54,880 --> 00:01:01,160 I don't have time to hear all that. No, this is a good time 13 00:01:02,280 --> 00:01:03,520 so 14 00:01:03,520 --> 00:01:06,960 now introducing today's Bible today is 15 00:01:07,640 --> 00:01:11,120 men's mental health awareness and 16 00:01:12,040 --> 00:01:14,680 Honor of June it is men's 17 00:01:15,440 --> 00:01:23,200 Mental health awareness and I did not see a lot of people talk about this and I want to be the one to talk about it 18 00:01:23,200 --> 00:01:25,800 So I'm gonna get into it like this 19 00:01:27,160 --> 00:01:29,160 as a woman 20 00:01:29,400 --> 00:01:30,720 that 21 00:01:30,720 --> 00:01:33,320 likes men especially black men I 22 00:01:33,920 --> 00:01:36,360 feel as though y'all should be 23 00:01:37,600 --> 00:01:38,880 able 24 00:01:38,880 --> 00:01:42,120 To express yourself y'all should be able 25 00:01:42,840 --> 00:01:49,640 To feel the way you feel because y'all mental is important just as much as I and the rest of the women out here as well 26 00:01:49,640 --> 00:01:57,920 when I was doing my research on men's mental health I seen like a lot of people would just post this picture that was on 27 00:01:58,160 --> 00:02:05,280 Instagram and just kept posting it but they wasn't like writing a message or anything on it like there the picture had a 28 00:02:05,280 --> 00:02:09,760 Whole bunch of stuff like you know if you are me, you know your health matters and things like that 29 00:02:10,240 --> 00:02:15,440 But me when I repost up I always like comment on it because I feel as though 30 00:02:15,440 --> 00:02:22,120 It's important, you know just to say how you feel but it also can help somebody just as well with this 31 00:02:22,400 --> 00:02:25,520 Podcast and with this episode. I hope that it does 32 00:02:25,960 --> 00:02:33,240 Help men out there or even if it just helped one man at least to know that don't be afraid to express yourself 33 00:02:34,120 --> 00:02:36,120 and the reason why I 34 00:02:36,280 --> 00:02:39,600 really really really want to pin this on black men because 35 00:02:39,600 --> 00:02:46,080 as a woman growing up around black men and you know raised by a black man and 36 00:02:47,080 --> 00:02:49,320 has a brother, you know and 37 00:02:49,880 --> 00:02:54,360 Are very close with men and things like that. I see a lot of things 38 00:02:55,040 --> 00:03:03,400 That y'all do to cover up your emotions and it makes me so upset because I'm like y'all live by this narrative 39 00:03:03,520 --> 00:03:05,520 Like oh, I'm a man 40 00:03:05,520 --> 00:03:10,240 Men real men don't cry real men don't do this real men don't do that 41 00:03:10,240 --> 00:03:16,800 But I feel as though every real man has some type of emotion every real man has the 42 00:03:17,080 --> 00:03:21,480 Right to feel how he feel because at the end of the day man, you're a human 43 00:03:21,480 --> 00:03:26,120 I don't want to hear all that narrative like I'm a man. I gotta be strong. I'm a man 44 00:03:26,120 --> 00:03:29,440 I gotta do something good that I gotta do that. No because at the end of the day 45 00:03:29,440 --> 00:03:34,920 It don't make you know different like I just don't understand at times 46 00:03:34,920 --> 00:03:38,520 Why men just don't want to express they some because I'm real big on 47 00:03:39,320 --> 00:03:45,320 Feelings I'm real big on feelings and I want to know like if I'm close with you 48 00:03:45,320 --> 00:03:49,200 Like if I'm really close with you and things like that. I want to know what's going on 49 00:03:49,600 --> 00:03:53,720 Especially if I consider you somebody really close to me, you know 50 00:03:53,720 --> 00:04:01,640 So with that being said, I just want to just get this out in the open like as a woman that sees 51 00:04:02,160 --> 00:04:09,800 Things and hear things from men that she's close with or that I see online. I feel as though 52 00:04:10,440 --> 00:04:16,240 Y'all cover so much emotion to the point where it messes up your mental and it leads to things that it should not lead to 53 00:04:16,800 --> 00:04:19,680 You know, and I feel as though yes at times 54 00:04:19,680 --> 00:04:24,720 This goes this one this little part right here goes for all black people who didn't women as well 55 00:04:24,800 --> 00:04:31,520 We have a hard time expressing ourselves now sometimes people do go on social media and express 56 00:04:31,520 --> 00:04:36,600 They sell because you never know sometimes that little post or message is a cry for help 57 00:04:36,800 --> 00:04:41,800 Like at times people be like, oh why she keep posting her feelings on there 58 00:04:41,800 --> 00:04:48,720 Nobody cares they're laughing at you things like that at times. I do feel like that because I feel like okay 59 00:04:48,720 --> 00:04:49,920 I 60 00:04:49,920 --> 00:04:52,560 Don't think you should be putting this on there 61 00:04:52,800 --> 00:04:56,280 But sometimes it'd be your last call, you know 62 00:04:56,280 --> 00:05:01,240 You can tell when the post is genuine and you can tell when the post is not genuine 63 00:05:01,440 --> 00:05:08,480 When a person is on there and just keep talking about sobbing sobbing about nonsense, but it'd be something like 64 00:05:09,720 --> 00:05:14,160 Realistically going on is something that's really eating them up balling them up beside and yes 65 00:05:14,160 --> 00:05:17,040 I you can tell like oh, this is a cry for help 66 00:05:17,040 --> 00:05:21,320 And well, I wouldn't technically say a cry for help you know that like oh my god 67 00:05:21,320 --> 00:05:25,960 You big car make it seem like I'm a crybaby. No, it's just a sign saying that I need help 68 00:05:25,960 --> 00:05:31,480 I want somebody to come to talk to me. You know, I need somebody to help me, you know 69 00:05:32,480 --> 00:05:39,620 And I get it and this is why I say this to say like I don't care what you are 70 00:05:39,640 --> 00:05:43,520 What you believe in this now the third as a woman a 71 00:05:43,520 --> 00:05:47,840 Man should be able to feel the way he feel because you're human at the end of the day 72 00:05:47,840 --> 00:05:53,080 I don't I don't want to hear all that narrative stuff because every man feels some type of way 73 00:05:53,480 --> 00:05:57,040 Even if it might be if it might not be the same as another man 74 00:05:57,360 --> 00:06:02,680 You feel some type of way about any and everything it'd be your job your kids your school work 75 00:06:02,680 --> 00:06:07,280 Your life whatever it is you're entitled to feel the way you feel and that don't make you soft 76 00:06:07,280 --> 00:06:12,640 And that's another thing that people fail to realize to that men fail to realize to like 77 00:06:12,640 --> 00:06:16,760 Who cares about this name call stuff that in a day your man, you know what you are 78 00:06:16,760 --> 00:06:20,360 You know what you do you know what you do, you know what you like your things like that 79 00:06:20,680 --> 00:06:25,020 You're a man at the end of the day. You're entitled to feel how you feel. I don't care 80 00:06:25,520 --> 00:06:32,320 Because if you hurting you're hurting express yourself be able to express yourself, you know as a woman 81 00:06:32,920 --> 00:06:35,880 Growing up around men once again. I've seen them 82 00:06:36,560 --> 00:06:38,660 Had a narrative at times, you know 83 00:06:38,660 --> 00:06:44,580 And real men don't cry real men don't do this because real men are a representation of 84 00:06:45,220 --> 00:06:50,060 What it is to take care of a family a strong and all the other 85 00:06:50,700 --> 00:06:53,820 Stereotypes and characteristics that defines a real man 86 00:06:54,500 --> 00:06:56,700 However, as I got older till now 87 00:06:56,700 --> 00:07:02,700 I understand why the men in my life did what they did and displayed what they did but behind closed doors 88 00:07:02,700 --> 00:07:08,300 They had feelings like at the end of the day they had feelings like they expressed they sell when they were angry 89 00:07:08,300 --> 00:07:10,300 They were hurt or whatever the case may be 90 00:07:10,380 --> 00:07:18,620 They they did it but you know sometimes when you do it, you know in society around others. It's like oh here comes all the 91 00:07:20,340 --> 00:07:26,180 Narcissism things like that the people that's quick to say oh, yeah, it's all you're not a man because you're crying like that 92 00:07:26,180 --> 00:07:28,980 No, I don't want to hear that shit. I 93 00:07:28,980 --> 00:07:35,700 I feel as though like these if I'm close with you and you are a man 94 00:07:36,460 --> 00:07:40,420 like and if you feel as though you need to vent vent 95 00:07:41,340 --> 00:07:46,500 Vent cuz you you're entitled to feel the way you feel and you're entitled to express yourself 96 00:07:46,860 --> 00:07:50,740 No matter how big or small the issue is if you feel like 97 00:07:51,460 --> 00:07:53,460 You're not in a good space right now 98 00:07:53,460 --> 00:08:00,340 And you want to express it express it because if you don't and keep it balled up that stuff is gonna mess up your mental 99 00:08:00,340 --> 00:08:02,340 And it's gonna drive you crazy 100 00:08:03,180 --> 00:08:06,780 Okay, it's gonna drive you nuts. It's gonna drive you insane 101 00:08:06,780 --> 00:08:08,100 and 102 00:08:08,100 --> 00:08:11,740 One thing I always say to myself like I gotta stay sane 103 00:08:11,740 --> 00:08:17,780 And I gotta be around people that's able to keep me sane because if not I will lose my mind 104 00:08:17,780 --> 00:08:24,940 And I thank God every day for them people that has kept me sane even if we haven't known each other from 105 00:08:25,340 --> 00:08:28,860 Many years, maybe if a couple months like they keep me saying like 106 00:08:29,340 --> 00:08:34,300 Like last week when I was you know preparing for the next episodes and things like that 107 00:08:34,300 --> 00:08:38,260 I text a few people the women in my life. They kept me sane because 108 00:08:38,940 --> 00:08:40,660 yeah 109 00:08:40,660 --> 00:08:42,220 It kept me sane 110 00:08:42,220 --> 00:08:49,300 Like when I was in moments that I just couldn't like I couldn't take it no more. I ran to them like mom 111 00:08:49,820 --> 00:08:56,340 Like that's my number one. She helped me and everything my best friend, you know and friends. I met at school 112 00:08:56,900 --> 00:09:01,260 And older women that met at work like they kept me sane 113 00:09:02,140 --> 00:09:08,100 Versus also too when it comes to the men in my life, even though, you know at times, you know when you are a girl and 114 00:09:08,100 --> 00:09:13,380 You at times you and your dad get into it. You got to remember he's doing what he's doing 115 00:09:13,380 --> 00:09:18,980 It's saying we say because he loves you and you're his child like me and my dad our bond is you know 116 00:09:18,980 --> 00:09:23,380 We have that father daughter bond and at times. Yes, it gets ugly 117 00:09:23,460 --> 00:09:26,820 But I always remember like he does this because he cares 118 00:09:27,540 --> 00:09:31,520 You know they do what they do because they care and he keeps me sane 119 00:09:31,520 --> 00:09:37,760 It's like my little brother like with three years apart, but I learned so much about him and he learned so much about me 120 00:09:38,040 --> 00:09:44,880 Like, you know, like just in general the men that that's in my life that let her in my life today 121 00:09:44,880 --> 00:09:50,120 I learned pieces from them a little bit of pieces or that they don't know about like my best friend 122 00:09:50,120 --> 00:09:55,280 We've been friends since elementary school, but became so so close with our transfer 123 00:09:55,280 --> 00:10:01,040 So the school that he went to the hospital he went to and like from that moment as we got older 124 00:10:01,040 --> 00:10:03,040 I learned something new about him every day and 125 00:10:04,200 --> 00:10:07,280 When I knew when things wasn't right for him 126 00:10:07,280 --> 00:10:12,720 I'd be like what's wrong like because you know, that's another thing too y'all men are real good at keeping a 127 00:10:12,720 --> 00:10:17,840 Narsha lawn type of guy. I'd be like, oh my gosh, bro. Just let that feeling out 128 00:10:17,840 --> 00:10:23,040 It's just me and you it's not the other bros. It's not you know, it's nobody else around 129 00:10:23,040 --> 00:10:26,360 It's just me and you just be able to fit and they like no, I don't want to do that 130 00:10:26,360 --> 00:10:27,560 I won't do that 131 00:10:27,560 --> 00:10:31,120 And I give them like five to ten minutes and they'd be like, alright, so here you go 132 00:10:31,120 --> 00:10:36,280 You know, I'd like see you like don't be afraid to that because you never know it is somebody in your corner 133 00:10:36,280 --> 00:10:42,640 That's willing to hear you and is willing to help you along the way and that's why I 134 00:10:43,560 --> 00:10:45,240 Want to 135 00:10:45,240 --> 00:10:50,320 Do this podcast because even though y'all cannot see my face physically 136 00:10:50,320 --> 00:10:55,600 You can hear my voice and I think a lot of people are better when they hear it verbally 137 00:10:56,000 --> 00:11:00,800 Sometimes then seeing it because you know, sometimes we see somebody their face they face is fresh 138 00:11:00,800 --> 00:11:03,360 I'm like, is this genuine things like that? 139 00:11:04,000 --> 00:11:07,080 But nevertheless, I just feel as though 140 00:11:07,720 --> 00:11:11,040 When you're able to sit down and talk to somebody 141 00:11:11,800 --> 00:11:16,960 You'll be able to you know, get a glimpse out even if you got a cry cry 142 00:11:16,960 --> 00:11:22,080 You got a shout you got a yell you got to do all that stuff do it because out of the day, bro 143 00:11:22,080 --> 00:11:27,760 You're human your mental matters and this is one issue was not even an issue 144 00:11:27,760 --> 00:11:34,800 I'm not issue this topic is not being talked about as much in the media because at times 145 00:11:35,120 --> 00:11:40,320 Yes, we tear down our men because at times they tear us down 146 00:11:40,320 --> 00:11:43,560 But at the end of the day if you're able if you're a woman 147 00:11:43,560 --> 00:11:46,920 You should be able to lift that man up 148 00:11:46,920 --> 00:11:52,720 It don't matter how bad the situation is because at the end of the day like I said, he's human 149 00:11:52,720 --> 00:11:59,440 You're human we're entitled to feel the way we feel and we got to be able to just let it out without 150 00:12:00,320 --> 00:12:07,920 Having to feel some type of way like for example like I'll be on Instagram like Instagram's the prime example for like my generation 151 00:12:07,920 --> 00:12:13,040 And Twitter like Twitter is just like you just say and do anything but Instagram 152 00:12:13,040 --> 00:12:20,360 I feel like that's where you pinpoint really see who's who for real and you know at times like females 153 00:12:20,360 --> 00:12:22,440 We post up while I don't do this 154 00:12:22,440 --> 00:12:25,520 I don't post my emotions because that's how I felt like people 155 00:12:25,880 --> 00:12:31,160 Take it and run with it. Oh my god. Look what he said today like oh, she all like oh, I feel so depressed 156 00:12:31,160 --> 00:12:35,560 I know I'm not doing that because one thing I do when I feel so depressed 157 00:12:35,560 --> 00:12:41,440 I run to the people that came that kept me saying like my parents my best friends or whatever and 158 00:12:41,760 --> 00:12:43,440 Then I dropped to my knees 159 00:12:43,440 --> 00:12:49,800 It's been so many times I dropped to my knees and prayed to God about all the situations that I've been through no matter 160 00:12:49,800 --> 00:12:53,400 If it was good or bad, I remember nights where I dropped on my knees and 161 00:12:54,000 --> 00:12:58,800 Fry my eyes out because at times where I was so hurt 162 00:12:59,400 --> 00:13:03,360 Well my mentor whatever the case may be, you know, no matter if it was good or bad 163 00:13:03,360 --> 00:13:07,400 I remember them nights. I dropped to my knees and cry and still to this day 164 00:13:07,400 --> 00:13:12,440 I dropped to my knees at times. I may not cry, but I still dropped to my knees and pray to God and 165 00:13:13,520 --> 00:13:18,000 He works but in order for them things to happen, you know them prayers to happen 166 00:13:18,000 --> 00:13:22,400 You got to put it in motion. You can't just say oh god or whoever you believe it 167 00:13:22,400 --> 00:13:25,400 Can you help me and you not put it in motion? 168 00:13:25,400 --> 00:13:28,600 You got to do things to get started, you know 169 00:13:28,600 --> 00:13:34,200 Like when you wind up that thing or whatever you like a toy when you wind it up you wind it up 170 00:13:34,200 --> 00:13:39,920 Like was it the jack-in-the-box you twisted it was you got to put more pressure in it for it to up here 171 00:13:40,120 --> 00:13:45,240 So as I say this to say this is for my men if you feel some type of way and 172 00:13:46,240 --> 00:13:48,240 you feel as though 173 00:13:48,440 --> 00:13:52,400 The people around you whatever not supporting you with things like that and not helping you 174 00:13:53,280 --> 00:13:56,560 The first thing I always say is sit down with them face to face 175 00:13:56,560 --> 00:14:02,400 Don't do it on face time don't do it in text because text can lead to what any and everything and the tone can be from 176 00:14:03,040 --> 00:14:06,040 Whatever like it can give mixed emotions face time is cool 177 00:14:06,040 --> 00:14:10,440 No, but I feel like I feel at war when you're in front of me and I'm looking you in your eye 178 00:14:10,520 --> 00:14:13,040 And I feel like okay you get what I'm saying 179 00:14:13,800 --> 00:14:19,840 So yes, see my man if you feel as though the people that you consider your friends and your village is not supporting you in a 180 00:14:19,840 --> 00:14:21,840 Way that you need support in 181 00:14:21,840 --> 00:14:27,080 Y'all need to sit down with these people one-on-one not all together not all together 182 00:14:27,080 --> 00:14:33,640 That can that can leaves conflict to you like you telling John you don't like this because he did this they tell Sean 183 00:14:33,640 --> 00:14:37,200 He did this you don't get this thing you tell rod like nah 184 00:14:37,320 --> 00:14:42,480 I want you to do it like individually like you know text them quality like hey, what's up, bro? 185 00:14:42,480 --> 00:14:48,080 Whatever sis whoever are you free so we can go out and talk or whatever case maybe because you know 186 00:14:48,080 --> 00:14:51,800 I'm feeling like this and you know or just say hey sister bro 187 00:14:51,800 --> 00:14:56,360 You know when are you free so we can link when we can talk for real don't tell them what it is right away? 188 00:14:56,360 --> 00:15:01,480 Cuz they gonna be like I don't got time stuff like that cuz you're gonna make time today if you care for me as much 189 00:15:01,480 --> 00:15:03,480 You're gonna make time today, okay? 190 00:15:03,840 --> 00:15:05,840 So yes for my man 191 00:15:05,840 --> 00:15:13,000 I say this to say please don't be afraid to speak the truth and speak your real feelings because you are a man 192 00:15:13,000 --> 00:15:17,520 Yes, you are but at the end of the day you're human you entitled to feel how you feel you wanna cry 193 00:15:17,520 --> 00:15:22,800 And I know a lot of men are going to get on me when I say this 194 00:15:23,200 --> 00:15:28,280 Growing up as a girl like I mentioned my dad used to 195 00:15:29,160 --> 00:15:32,840 Try to not even try he would always tell me I 196 00:15:33,560 --> 00:15:35,560 would teach you how to 197 00:15:36,080 --> 00:15:38,080 Be a man too because at times 198 00:15:38,720 --> 00:15:41,800 What if you don't have a man or I'm not around your brother 199 00:15:41,800 --> 00:15:48,360 Uncle down around you got to do certain things on your own like the narrative like women can't do things a man can't do and a woman 200 00:15:48,360 --> 00:15:50,680 Can't and a man can't do what a woman can do 201 00:15:50,840 --> 00:15:51,360 No 202 00:15:51,360 --> 00:15:57,680 I learned that a woman can do whatever a man can do and a man can do whatever a woman can do from my father 203 00:15:57,680 --> 00:16:01,760 And he's like a lot of things he taught me like certain stuff like you will see a man doing 204 00:16:01,760 --> 00:16:07,480 I learned how to do and it's like it's simple, but you just got to be able to learn how to do it 205 00:16:07,960 --> 00:16:09,920 But I know y'all gonna get on me for this one 206 00:16:09,920 --> 00:16:15,000 You know, this is takes the cake right here. You know when you grow when you growing up, you know 207 00:16:15,360 --> 00:16:20,400 You're a kid like when you're a kid you're able to just have fun 208 00:16:20,400 --> 00:16:24,340 The whole narrative as a kid have fun learn things like that and why you have a fun 209 00:16:24,340 --> 00:16:26,340 You know at times you do hurt yourself 210 00:16:27,080 --> 00:16:33,760 You do hurt yourself to the point where them hurts hurt so to the point where you hurt yourself them bruises and the pain hurts 211 00:16:33,760 --> 00:16:39,160 So bad you got to cry and this is where I feel as though this is why sometimes at men 212 00:16:39,160 --> 00:16:45,920 Always say men don't cry because when they were growing up if they hurt they sell for they feels like when they cry about it 213 00:16:45,920 --> 00:16:49,280 the man or the mother is saying 214 00:16:50,080 --> 00:16:54,200 Why you crying stop all that crying shake it off. It ain't that bad man 215 00:16:54,200 --> 00:17:00,880 If that fucking pain hurt if I was paying I'm gonna cry about it because what you want me to do 216 00:17:00,920 --> 00:17:03,420 Just sit there and just try to suck it up 217 00:17:03,420 --> 00:17:08,440 No, it's not see when you're a kid when you when we were kids we were just playful 218 00:17:08,440 --> 00:17:11,040 We're playful. We did some reckless stuff 219 00:17:11,440 --> 00:17:18,320 We did some crazy reckless stuff like I got some bruises on my leg that just still there like the most robberies and things like that 220 00:17:18,840 --> 00:17:20,680 like you know 221 00:17:20,680 --> 00:17:24,280 But yes, I feel as though that was the number one 222 00:17:24,800 --> 00:17:30,420 Bread flag right there when you were growing up as a kid and you know boys play rough 223 00:17:30,800 --> 00:17:32,800 Okay, mind you I 224 00:17:32,800 --> 00:17:38,960 Like for before my sister and brothers were born I was the only child and I had boy cousins 225 00:17:38,960 --> 00:17:44,520 I used to come over play with me and my girl cousins and things like that those little suckers 226 00:17:45,720 --> 00:17:50,100 Were rough they would rough you up beat you up and do things like that 227 00:17:50,100 --> 00:17:54,440 I want to take like everything with you then when you get them back and when you finally get them back 228 00:17:54,440 --> 00:17:58,000 It's like I got them. Yes. I got them now. Now you feel how I feel 229 00:17:58,000 --> 00:18:03,160 But you know when it was us girls like, you know, stop crying or they but oh, it's okay 230 00:18:03,160 --> 00:18:03,800 It's all right 231 00:18:03,800 --> 00:18:09,040 And you know when men like you know the father of the son when they see the mother 232 00:18:09,040 --> 00:18:14,400 You know cater to their son and be like, it's okay. I was alright. They be like, no, get off him. Let him go 233 00:18:14,400 --> 00:18:18,160 He's a man. He he be alright. He don't need to be crying 234 00:18:18,160 --> 00:18:23,640 That's where the number one red flag is at because he's a child at that time 235 00:18:23,640 --> 00:18:30,240 That's a child if he feels some type of way let him cry about it. Don't let him just try to tough it up 236 00:18:30,240 --> 00:18:34,440 Because that's hard. That's like a number one first flag like red flag right there 237 00:18:34,440 --> 00:18:38,120 Like you can't just push that boy feelings away 238 00:18:38,120 --> 00:18:44,760 Cuz if that's what he feel with that pain is hurting him and that's the only way he can express it is by crying 239 00:18:44,880 --> 00:18:49,840 Let him cry. Don't don't try to be like, oh check it off toughen it up 240 00:18:49,840 --> 00:18:56,200 No, and like I said, I was raised around me and my dad used to say the same thing to me tough it up 241 00:18:56,200 --> 00:18:58,840 It's okay. It's all right. Check it off and end up 242 00:18:59,360 --> 00:19:03,280 You know trying to help help the situation to you like come on 243 00:19:04,000 --> 00:19:06,440 But yes, I feel like that's the number one red 244 00:19:06,440 --> 00:19:12,720 That was the number one red flag right there with me tried to tell these fun or neck using whatever that you know 245 00:19:13,080 --> 00:19:18,280 Don't cry when pain gets to your way. That's number one flag right there and that type of stuff 246 00:19:18,280 --> 00:19:20,280 I 247 00:19:20,360 --> 00:19:25,440 Always be in their mind cuz like okay if I'm hurt or I feel hurt or I hurt myself 248 00:19:25,440 --> 00:19:31,960 I can't cry from these people cuz they're gonna call me soft and they're gonna call me a girl cuz that's what girls do 249 00:19:32,080 --> 00:19:37,360 Girls always express their feelings girls always crying and yelling and I'm a boy 250 00:19:37,360 --> 00:19:40,680 I can't do that cuz they're gonna say I'm a girl too 251 00:19:40,960 --> 00:19:47,100 But I'm really a boy and that's what I feel is though right there that narrative needs to be stopped 252 00:19:47,100 --> 00:19:51,300 because at the end of the day if you are a 253 00:19:51,980 --> 00:19:58,980 Man and you feel this type of way and it's hurting you and the only thing you could do is cry 254 00:19:58,980 --> 00:20:03,740 Stream yell kick whatever do it. I don't care. I don't care 255 00:20:03,740 --> 00:20:09,780 That'll make you soft that goes to show you a real man a real man shows his feelings a real man 256 00:20:09,780 --> 00:20:15,860 Gonna tell ideas how he feel because that's how he is and that's what he's feeling. That's what real man do 257 00:20:15,860 --> 00:20:20,420 I feel like a real man shows a feelings a real man gonna tell how he feel 258 00:20:20,860 --> 00:20:23,460 Rather than sugarcoating it and be like I'm good. I'm good 259 00:20:23,460 --> 00:20:26,700 But behind doors like when he around about he probably crying his eyes out 260 00:20:27,460 --> 00:20:32,540 Like just think on that real quick like I know it's probably like I know this right here 261 00:20:32,540 --> 00:20:37,860 I know it's right here a lot of men right now like they should talk about me like that. Yes. I'm talking about you, sir 262 00:20:38,860 --> 00:20:42,620 I'm talking about you because this needs to be addressed in honor of 263 00:20:43,540 --> 00:20:45,540 men's mental health 264 00:20:45,540 --> 00:20:53,540 Awareness of our fellow this needs to be said and this should be drawn to your attention and needs to be drawn to all of our 265 00:20:53,660 --> 00:21:00,020 attention especially when it comes to us women black men women that it needs to be drawn because a 266 00:21:00,260 --> 00:21:03,940 Lot of things that we see in scene when we were growing up 267 00:21:04,540 --> 00:21:08,820 Is haven't been addressed. It's been pushed away and I feel like 268 00:21:09,540 --> 00:21:10,940 as a 269 00:21:10,940 --> 00:21:17,380 Woman a black woman I feel as though our black men do not get the same 270 00:21:18,140 --> 00:21:20,140 respect that all these other 271 00:21:20,380 --> 00:21:22,380 generations that 272 00:21:22,940 --> 00:21:24,620 People used to 273 00:21:24,620 --> 00:21:28,060 believe in them narratives like the generations before be like, oh 274 00:21:28,980 --> 00:21:35,580 This man can do this cuz he's that that man did it. No, I feel as though within this generation 275 00:21:35,820 --> 00:21:37,820 I see a lot of boys 276 00:21:37,820 --> 00:21:45,400 Men feel some type of way and don't express it and I'm the type to be quick to say what's wrong with you 277 00:21:45,400 --> 00:21:47,980 You want to talk like are you okay? I'm first. I'm gonna say are you okay? 278 00:21:48,540 --> 00:21:53,540 Cuz I'm like something don't seem right and isn't it's not you know, it's not this not you and 279 00:21:53,860 --> 00:22:00,500 You know when a boy or a man can tell when a girl or woman's not feeling right 280 00:22:00,500 --> 00:22:06,780 They could say what's wrong man like what's wrong and what we don't tell them it balls them up to vice versa 281 00:22:06,780 --> 00:22:13,860 When a man or a boy don't tell a girl or woman was wrong that balls us up to this like weak both can't be mad 282 00:22:13,860 --> 00:22:15,540 Somebody needs to talk 283 00:22:15,540 --> 00:22:20,460 Somebody needs to express how they feel because at the end of the day like I said you're human 284 00:22:20,460 --> 00:22:24,900 I don't want to hear that narrative. Oh, I'm a man. I can't show that because 285 00:22:25,580 --> 00:22:27,580 Like I said previous generations 286 00:22:28,140 --> 00:22:34,380 They always had this narrative for men to be the higher-ups and when you are higher up 287 00:22:34,380 --> 00:22:42,180 You got to stay strong. You got to keep that poker face on you got to show them characteristics of strong and 288 00:22:42,820 --> 00:22:44,820 Strength and muscle or not like no 289 00:22:44,820 --> 00:22:51,160 I feel as though you are mad and you feel like a way about something or person or thing or something is stressing you out 290 00:22:51,160 --> 00:22:52,920 It's like you out or whatever 291 00:22:52,920 --> 00:22:59,340 Express it because if not it's going to mess up your mental so bad to the point where you clash and when you clash 292 00:22:59,340 --> 00:23:01,960 It makes you do things you don't want to do 293 00:23:01,960 --> 00:23:03,960 Like it makes you turn into 294 00:23:05,000 --> 00:23:12,960 Like turn into this person that you never thought that you could turn into and it may lead to people around you 295 00:23:12,960 --> 00:23:15,080 Don't even want to be around you because they are afraid 296 00:23:15,880 --> 00:23:21,840 Because they like oh my gosh like he just turned from this to that this to that and it's scary because it's not who he is 297 00:23:22,360 --> 00:23:23,720 however 298 00:23:23,720 --> 00:23:30,480 I'm going to pick on you men because I know some of y'all don't want to hear this but I'm saying y'all don't like acts of health I 299 00:23:30,480 --> 00:23:33,320 Said it y'all don't like acts of health 300 00:23:34,040 --> 00:23:39,960 And I know that's another thing too like they say real men don't ask for help real man will figure away real man 301 00:23:39,960 --> 00:23:45,560 We're gonna do this real man won't do that. Okay, but like I said my definition of a real man is different from 302 00:23:46,080 --> 00:23:52,280 The narrative and what generation hold as a real man a real man 303 00:23:52,280 --> 00:23:56,480 Go on show this feeling for real man going extra help when it's needed to ask for help 304 00:23:56,480 --> 00:24:03,040 I don't care what it is if you if you're at your lowest point and you just have to depend on somebody do it 305 00:24:03,040 --> 00:24:06,760 And you know don't say like I need help like money involved 306 00:24:06,760 --> 00:24:12,080 You know if there's money situation don't say cannot hold $100 by Friday and I give it to you 307 00:24:12,560 --> 00:24:15,560 Sunday you don't give them to him Sunday, you know how people are 308 00:24:15,880 --> 00:24:18,680 This is just to make this to sum that up real quick 309 00:24:19,120 --> 00:24:21,120 if you got to ask for stuff and 310 00:24:21,120 --> 00:24:26,600 You know you need it don't put a date on it until you know it's official 311 00:24:28,000 --> 00:24:34,960 But nevertheless just yes y'all do not like asking for help or y'all don't like just sitting in talking 312 00:24:35,240 --> 00:24:38,480 Period when it comes to your field because y'all feel like that's too soft 313 00:24:38,480 --> 00:24:44,600 Like why you don't mean to sit talk about my feelings my emotions like that's what y'all do you that's what y'all women do you? 314 00:24:45,120 --> 00:24:49,840 No, no sway. I don't care. I don't some women don't express 315 00:24:49,840 --> 00:24:51,840 They so evil and I'll tell you right now 316 00:24:52,480 --> 00:24:55,480 As it being cancer season 2 I 317 00:24:56,520 --> 00:25:04,000 Am a cancer and I stand turn term. I stand firm and turn on this one 318 00:25:06,840 --> 00:25:10,520 But I stand firm on this one right here as a cancer yes 319 00:25:10,520 --> 00:25:15,680 I do wear my heart on my sleeve because if I care so much about 320 00:25:15,680 --> 00:25:20,040 About you and I consider you an important person in my life 321 00:25:20,040 --> 00:25:25,960 Whether you are family friends or somebody that I'm talking to or in relationship with 322 00:25:26,200 --> 00:25:34,760 I'm going to ask you non-stop until you break and tell me what's going on because yes at the end of their day 323 00:25:35,000 --> 00:25:42,320 You're entitled to feel how you feel because you're a man. I don't care about that narrative. Oh 324 00:25:42,640 --> 00:25:43,680 I 325 00:25:43,680 --> 00:25:52,280 Can't express myself because that's a sign of weakness. You know, it's not sway take that out your head I 326 00:25:53,640 --> 00:25:56,680 Say this to say this in honor of men's 327 00:25:57,320 --> 00:25:59,420 health awareness month 328 00:26:00,280 --> 00:26:05,000 From a black woman speak it to my black me out there 329 00:26:05,000 --> 00:26:08,920 Do not be afraid to express yourself because you never know 330 00:26:08,920 --> 00:26:15,720 Somebody in your corner or a complete stranger is out there willing to help you and those people that are willing to help you 331 00:26:15,720 --> 00:26:20,560 Are the ones that care so much about you and want you to be better 332 00:26:20,920 --> 00:26:26,280 For your mental and physical well-being because that's another thing too, you know 333 00:26:26,280 --> 00:26:33,480 Like men are quick to see a woman and be like, you know, if she looked rough they quick to say oh, she does like herself 334 00:26:33,480 --> 00:26:35,240 Oh 335 00:26:35,240 --> 00:26:40,040 It's nice it's nice first of for us women when we see our men and I see a man 336 00:26:40,040 --> 00:26:44,340 You know if I see a boy or whatever a man or boy whoever there's always, you know 337 00:26:44,340 --> 00:26:48,360 Stay up to par and then I see like sometimes I be like hold up 338 00:26:48,360 --> 00:26:50,960 He looked like he don't look like yourself today 339 00:26:50,960 --> 00:26:58,440 He don't look like you know the super top or the nice the nice polo jeans, you know, whatever type gear 340 00:26:58,440 --> 00:27:00,440 He don't look like that. He looks like 341 00:27:00,440 --> 00:27:05,920 Look the press and then the press outfits. I say is the hoodies with the select pants 342 00:27:06,560 --> 00:27:10,120 Those are the enemy red and the sometime baby. It's hot right now 343 00:27:10,120 --> 00:27:17,280 And I and if I know and I know y'all know these if you see somebody outside wearing a hoodie in the sweatpants and down there 344 00:27:17,280 --> 00:27:19,280 God damn 345 00:27:20,000 --> 00:27:24,400 80 to 90 degrees you're gonna question. What's going on? Are you okay? 346 00:27:24,760 --> 00:27:27,920 You know, like are you okay? And that's another thing too 347 00:27:27,920 --> 00:27:30,680 Yes, your mental plays a big part 348 00:27:30,680 --> 00:27:34,080 but also your appearance your appearance plays a big part too because 349 00:27:34,640 --> 00:27:37,860 physically a person can see how you are like a 350 00:27:38,480 --> 00:27:44,000 Person can really see how you are without them even have to really like get into like the mental 351 00:27:44,000 --> 00:27:50,480 But I do get deep to the mental like if your physical appearance is not how you are like on a regular 352 00:27:51,080 --> 00:27:53,560 I'm like, hold up. What's wrong? 353 00:27:53,560 --> 00:27:58,400 Because like it's something going on you want to talk about it and if you don't want to talk about it right to the nail 354 00:27:58,400 --> 00:28:03,640 Let's talk about later, you know, let's find a solution to where so we could be able to talk about this 355 00:28:04,600 --> 00:28:09,120 And here's another example. I want to use by me being from Baltimore City 356 00:28:09,880 --> 00:28:14,360 A couple weeks ago a guy that was from the city 357 00:28:14,800 --> 00:28:20,560 He passed away. He committed suicide and from what I had seen on Instagram 358 00:28:20,560 --> 00:28:27,240 He put a huge impact on two others a very very huge impact of it and he was dealing with 359 00:28:27,680 --> 00:28:34,600 Some type of mental as well from what I was reading, you know, the suicide note and everything like he was hurting 360 00:28:35,080 --> 00:28:39,760 And he was hurting really bad to the point where I felt as though as a person 361 00:28:40,320 --> 00:28:44,920 That he just needed people in his corner to be there for him help him to 362 00:28:45,680 --> 00:28:49,400 You know be the best him he could be and make him feel better 363 00:28:49,400 --> 00:28:54,680 You know at times even us people when we do try to help the people we love at times 364 00:28:54,680 --> 00:28:57,640 They still feel as though that this is not for them 365 00:28:57,640 --> 00:29:02,800 And I always tell people like at least try don't do nothing 366 00:29:02,800 --> 00:29:06,920 Don't just sit there and analyze you need to try like if you see your friend 367 00:29:07,120 --> 00:29:13,200 That's a male or your family member. That's a male going through something speak on it before it's too late 368 00:29:13,880 --> 00:29:18,160 And when I say too late because that man, I don't know his name right now 369 00:29:18,160 --> 00:29:20,520 It's not coming to my mind. But we did I'm gonna say 370 00:29:21,400 --> 00:29:26,680 He was an Instagram so once but he put a lot a lot of 371 00:29:27,720 --> 00:29:29,720 mother freaking 372 00:29:31,120 --> 00:29:38,480 Impact on people he put a huge impact on people in the city even pride people from places like that's that's out of state 373 00:29:38,480 --> 00:29:44,580 Or whatever that's not even in city like and things like that people like that are the ones you most definitely have to look 374 00:29:44,580 --> 00:29:49,860 You have to really really really check up on like I believe in that saying, you know 375 00:29:49,860 --> 00:29:54,500 Like if you have that friend that's always laughing giggling making a joke 376 00:29:54,500 --> 00:29:59,300 You know always the life of the party or the always watching good spirit check up on them 377 00:29:59,300 --> 00:30:03,660 Because they are the main ones that are going through something and they're not speaking on you 378 00:30:04,060 --> 00:30:09,940 They are the main ones that are going through something and they're not speaking on it and it needs to and they need help 379 00:30:09,940 --> 00:30:11,940 Just as much as they check up on you 380 00:30:11,940 --> 00:30:18,960 And I'm that type of person too like I've always always, you know crack a joke or two here and there but 381 00:30:19,900 --> 00:30:21,900 Sometimes I'd be like 382 00:30:21,900 --> 00:30:26,940 Somebody check up on me, even though at times I don't want to be checked up on because I don't want people to be like 383 00:30:26,940 --> 00:30:32,300 Oh, she's just sobbing and all that. No, you never know what somebody's going through 384 00:30:32,300 --> 00:30:38,700 And it's always the ones that are always caring and there for you. You need to check up on them because those are the ones 385 00:30:39,340 --> 00:30:40,660 that 386 00:30:40,660 --> 00:30:44,740 Can keep that mask on real good but behind closed doors 387 00:30:44,740 --> 00:30:51,300 They take that mask off and that's where the real them the real deal of them comes out like this is it 388 00:30:51,780 --> 00:30:56,180 You know and when I read that story about that young about that man 389 00:30:56,420 --> 00:30:58,740 It it hurt me. They're like, bro 390 00:30:58,740 --> 00:31:02,460 That was really sad like he really put a huge impact on to a lot of people 391 00:31:03,340 --> 00:31:06,220 In the city his family friends 392 00:31:06,220 --> 00:31:11,140 He really was like a icon like a legend within the city and for him 393 00:31:11,140 --> 00:31:17,500 And for him to you know, it was tragic for what happened to him that a lot of people was like, you know 394 00:31:17,660 --> 00:31:23,640 Men's mental health is real and it is but this is the narrative to that. I don't like you know 395 00:31:23,640 --> 00:31:28,660 When things like that do happen to people they always say please check up on the ones you love and careful 396 00:31:29,020 --> 00:31:30,900 Okay, they check up on them and that's it 397 00:31:30,900 --> 00:31:37,220 At least I know at times it's probably like I don't want to keep bothering this person bother them 398 00:31:37,820 --> 00:31:41,580 Let them know that you care. Let them know that you're here. Like let them know that 399 00:31:42,220 --> 00:31:48,380 I'm here for you. I'm checking up on you. That's me like like within my family members 400 00:31:48,660 --> 00:31:50,660 the friends and 401 00:31:51,140 --> 00:31:55,060 The boys I used to talk to have you know some type of bond with I 402 00:31:55,780 --> 00:31:59,140 Always make sure we don't end on bad terms because you know 403 00:31:59,140 --> 00:32:01,700 You don't want to have that burden on like oh my gosh 404 00:32:01,700 --> 00:32:05,180 We get into a bad turns and this happened and I didn't want this to happen 405 00:32:05,180 --> 00:32:10,020 I always check up on them like I always took something like hey such as such 406 00:32:10,020 --> 00:32:12,540 You know, I just thought about you today or hey such as such 407 00:32:12,540 --> 00:32:16,440 I see what you post on Instagram or whatever. I just want to make sure you okay 408 00:32:16,440 --> 00:32:22,340 No, make sure you know everything all right. I'm here for you especially the ones I used to talk to like the dudes 409 00:32:22,340 --> 00:32:25,080 I used to be really cool with they were talked to because like 410 00:32:25,080 --> 00:32:30,480 You know like you know the beginning stage when you meet somebody they talk about themselves and then you learn 411 00:32:30,480 --> 00:32:33,480 I learned a little bit about them and then more them little details 412 00:32:33,480 --> 00:32:38,160 I learned about them I keep with me because it's like that's special and you know 413 00:32:38,440 --> 00:32:42,800 most females don't talk about it, but I'm gonna talk about like it. I'm me a guy or 414 00:32:43,960 --> 00:32:49,200 My family will ever a guy period and you know, we talked in or whatever 415 00:32:49,200 --> 00:32:55,520 Oh, I'm gonna take a little bit of details. I'm seeing or hearing and I'm gonna keep that in 416 00:32:55,520 --> 00:32:59,120 Wow, like even if he say something that's really like whoa 417 00:32:59,120 --> 00:33:04,640 I never heard you for or do things I never seen like oh never did this before just a little things too and just 418 00:33:04,960 --> 00:33:08,240 reminding them a little things you you know kept and 419 00:33:09,200 --> 00:33:16,480 You just seen within them that can make their day too. Like you never know who day you can make especially when it comes to me like 420 00:33:16,480 --> 00:33:20,080 I'm gonna get on the girls one this one down get on the girl 421 00:33:20,480 --> 00:33:22,480 Don't be afraid to call that man 422 00:33:23,000 --> 00:33:28,160 Even if that man is a your life not in your life your family not your blood 423 00:33:28,640 --> 00:33:33,880 Your clothes friend not your clothes friend. Don't be afraid to call that man check up what I mean be like look I 424 00:33:34,400 --> 00:33:38,160 Thought about you today. I want to make sure you're okay or whatever, you know 425 00:33:38,160 --> 00:33:45,840 And if y'all not for bad terms, please apologize like just take accountability y'all just you know, just take accountability 426 00:33:46,760 --> 00:33:48,760 accountability on it don't be 427 00:33:49,200 --> 00:33:51,200 Don't be that type of person. I don't care 428 00:33:51,240 --> 00:33:55,400 He she did it at no cuz I can myself they meant to win yours too 429 00:33:56,360 --> 00:33:58,840 So as I say this to say 430 00:34:00,840 --> 00:34:04,560 Within the black community as a black woman I 431 00:34:04,560 --> 00:34:12,520 Should wrongly stand behind the black man because being raised and brought up by black men 432 00:34:12,520 --> 00:34:20,160 I've seen all the amazing things that y'all did to the point where that at times y'all had y'all moments 433 00:34:20,160 --> 00:34:27,000 Where y'all want to cry and shout and y'all did it behind closed doors and wasn't afraid and was afraid to talk to people 434 00:34:27,000 --> 00:34:30,000 I say this to say this 435 00:34:30,000 --> 00:34:36,520 Don't be afraid to express yourself. Don't be afraid to say how you feel because you either today 436 00:34:36,520 --> 00:34:42,560 Yes, you're a man, but you're human you want to have to feel the way you feel you're excited to say which one to say you got a 437 00:34:42,560 --> 00:34:46,360 Crosh out y'all do it because that's how you feel at that moment doing 438 00:34:47,360 --> 00:34:49,880 Okay, so yes, I know 439 00:34:50,440 --> 00:34:52,440 this episode is kind of late because 440 00:34:53,160 --> 00:34:55,800 You know once June is over that's it 441 00:34:55,800 --> 00:35:00,200 But I wanted to speak on this because a lot of people is not speaking on these and I feel like 442 00:35:00,800 --> 00:35:08,960 Why do I speak on this like they men are important to like men play a big part in the world too, especially the black man? 443 00:35:09,440 --> 00:35:10,640 so 444 00:35:10,640 --> 00:35:13,440 Yes, as I end off this episode 445 00:35:13,440 --> 00:35:20,840 I just want all my man with many my mainly my black man to remember this you are important 446 00:35:22,000 --> 00:35:23,600 You are 447 00:35:23,600 --> 00:35:24,840 very 448 00:35:24,840 --> 00:35:26,080 very 449 00:35:26,080 --> 00:35:28,080 Important for most of all 450 00:35:28,800 --> 00:35:35,480 You are a person that has feelings and you are able to say how you feel 451 00:35:35,760 --> 00:35:42,920 When you need to feel so you need to release the anger and anything like that do it 452 00:35:43,040 --> 00:35:46,040 Don't be afraid to do it. Just do it 453 00:35:47,360 --> 00:35:52,040 Because once you do that it's gonna help you mentally and physically I 454 00:35:52,040 --> 00:35:54,040 hope 455 00:35:54,320 --> 00:35:57,520 I hope this episode really really really 456 00:35:58,200 --> 00:36:01,000 put an impact on to somebody's life because 457 00:36:02,440 --> 00:36:08,680 Man, I'm being on a mental. I'm really being on a mental and I feel as though that it needs to be said that needs to be 458 00:36:09,160 --> 00:36:11,640 Something needs to be done like ASAP 459 00:36:12,320 --> 00:36:14,320 so yes, I 460 00:36:14,560 --> 00:36:21,200 Hope you guys have enjoyed listening to my voice me go on a rant because this is well not even a rant 461 00:36:21,200 --> 00:36:27,760 I guess I would call it right whatever but this has been the longest episode I have made so far because this 462 00:36:28,360 --> 00:36:35,680 This vibe I felt as though need to be said in address like ASAP because like I said nobody has really mentioned about it 463 00:36:35,800 --> 00:36:40,040 Yes, they make that little Instagram post but nobody really has talked about it 464 00:36:40,040 --> 00:36:42,280 And yes, I'll be the ones to talk about it 465 00:36:42,280 --> 00:36:50,320 And I did and I hope and I hope that someone out there has I really hope that I hope that I have helped somebody out there 466 00:36:50,320 --> 00:36:51,440 You know 467 00:36:51,440 --> 00:36:57,680 So yes as I end this off I say this I wish y'all nothing but peace of blessings 468 00:36:57,680 --> 00:37:03,360 I hope that y'all be safe out here because you know what summertime I want y'all to be safe be careful 469 00:37:03,600 --> 00:37:06,960 Wherever you go, please make sure y'all on your pleasing cues 470 00:37:07,800 --> 00:37:11,640 And make sure y'all stay hydrated and everything because it is hot outside 471 00:37:13,120 --> 00:37:19,560 And as always until next time I cannot wait for you guys to hear the next 472 00:37:19,560 --> 00:37:21,560 Fab of the day 473 00:37:21,560 --> 00:37:50,560 Bye