And welcome to an episode originally recorded in 2013,
and then as an afterthought, I decided to have guests included.
So you can tell where the, where this is going to go.
I'm Andy Rice.
This is Fried Rice podcast with me.
Let's get fried.
And with me as always is Austin.
He drove three hours to be here.
And he, this movie that we're about to review
made him miss repo, the genetic opera feral.
Yeah, that's a first for Austin where he doesn't even
want you to check him out on nothing.
We have Michael, this movie that we
watched that we're reviewing made him miss man thing.
Larson.
Still chillios.
I'm going to kill this motherfucker.
OK.
Whoa, Austin.
Whoa, whoa, put the gun down, Austin.
Whoa.
I'm going to fucking kill this motherfucker.
Whoa, whoa, whoa.
I can't sleep anymore.
Hey, listen, it's just a bit.
It's just put the gun down.
I'm going to fucking kill this motherfucker.
It's just put the gun down.
Kill me, you, our guests.
Yeah, all of us.
Oh, shit.
Motherfucker.
Oh, shit.
Here, give me that.
Give me that.
I'll fucking kill him.
I'll fucking bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop.
Can't kill Michael Larson.
Fuck you, Mike.
Chillios, motherfucker.
With us as always is we have Isaac.
This movie that we're reviewing this week
made him miss slipstreams starring Mark fucking Hamill.
Gonzalez.
Yes.
What's the number for the suicide hotline again?
I think you can just Google.
I think they're changing it to, we're
having a three digits one now, which is going to be pretty cool.
I think it's going to be like 917 or something like that,
or like 912 or something.
It's like close to it.
That was a joke.
I'm so sorry.
But yeah, I am glad for the.
Oh, I know, which is probably useful information
after watching this film.
Yeah.
With us as always, it's Brennan.
Da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da,
da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da,
I'm going to kill myself.
Yeah, he's going to kill himself.
But also, this movie made him miss,
if you don't stop, da, da, da, you'll go blind.
Shipley up to Boston.
Hello, everybody.
Well, everybody, this is one of those movies where now I think
this is the Robert Polarski on the phone.
Oh, my God.
Should we call him?
Wait, wait, wait.
I want to say no.
Tell him it's such a great movie and that he should watch it.
Yeah.
Wait, we finally get him back for if you don't.
Should I call Bob and ask him and tell him that he's redeemed?
No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
Just sell him that we just watched the best movie.
And there's a guy named Bob Polarski at the end
and you should you should watch it.
I don't want to lie to him.
No, make him watch.
Make him watch it.
Make him fucking watch it.
I thought if we call Bob and then we'll get his honest review,
have him called and leave a message of what
he thought of the movie.
Would that be considered a hate crime, though?
Yeah.
Yes, and it's OK because it's Bob.
Yeah, I think, yeah, I'd waste a few of his golden hours.
I told everybody to bring stones so that we could stone Mike
to death because I'd read that in Arizona that if you
commit a heinous enough crime, you're allowed to do that.
Uh, yeah, so Mike, you have a lot to answer for today.
But I thought we could call Bob and be like, yo,
everything's forgiven.
Yeah, but if you don't stop, you'll go blind.
I think it would be funnier if he watched it
and then phoned in a review.
Yeah, I'll reach out to him after.
If you call him right now, call him right now,
you're going to get like a story of how he just ran out of weed
and his, you know.
What do you say, is something about kayaks?
You know, just like kayaking.
Now I kind of want to just call Bob
and have him on for a couple of minutes.
What do you think?
Sure.
All right.
But let's not make him talk about singularities.
He answered last time.
He did, yeah.
Yeah, he knows what's up.
It's a Saturday afternoon.
Well, or whenever we record.
And, uh.
For a secret location.
Where is he?
I'm disclosed.
Kayak.
I think I call him Robert Bob Polarski on my phone.
No, I don't.
I call him Bob.
I put everyone's full government name in my phone.
Do you really?
Yeah, yours is Andrew Rice.
OK, calm down.
People don't need to know that.
And he's Andy, not Samber.
Not.
All right.
His teeth are pretty normal.
Don't forget, the mic can't pick it up.
Wait, it?
Please leave your message.
Oh, the son of a bitch.
He doesn't even have his own message.
All right, everybody, on three.
Fuck you, Bob.
Why aren't you fucking answering?
You're supposed to answer the phone.
Answer the fucking phone.
By the way, Bob, but for real, though, we
watched a movie called Singularity.
It's one of the best things we've watched.
And we need you to watch it.
And then go ahead and give us a call at the voicemail.
And leave us one if you can.
Because we need your opinion on it.
Singularity, 2017.
It's free on Tubi.
You have no excuse not to watch it.
You should watch it.
OK, great.
We'll see you then, Bob.
I hung up after you guys were all saying fuck you.
That might be the meanest thing you've ever done.
It might be.
Yeah, the meanest thing you buy the transit of property.
That's true.
That's what's Mike's pick.
Yeah, so whatever.
Let me ask you a question.
What if Bob died yesterday in his flight?
For the last month, I've heard nothing, except for,
we only watch good movies now.
We need to start watching bad movies again.
It makes for better podcasts.
Who's?
Wah, wah, wah.
So I pick a bad movie, and y'all are all pissed about it.
Wait, who?
What do you want?
You know there's more bullets for this gun, right?
Who was complaining about watching good movies?
Those two.
Every time.
Every week, we did a thing.
We keep watching good movies.
I like watching good movies.
I don't like watching shitty movies.
They're torturous.
We said B movies.
B movies.
We don't have enough weed to watch bad movies over and over.
This movie was heinously worse because I neglected my kids
to watch this film.
So they're going to go to therapy with me
for watching this fucking film.
That's the time you want to have back.
Now CPS is going to be after me.
Great.
And how old are your children?
3 and 10.
Those are the most precious times of their life, Austin.
And they're not going to get back.
And imagine if they walked in and saw him watching it.
They lost respect for him.
The three-year-old walked in.
She's like, even I know that this is such a shitty movie
that you could be doing better than this daddy.
And then walks away in disgust.
And this is the story of how your children became film
critics.
I think I'd rather be walked in while I'm
beating off by my children than watching this film.
With a pelt or a mint.
This film was more embarrassing.
It's less embarrassing to get caught mid-sex or mid-jurian
off, yeah.
Well, it's something you never hear this episode.
This is going to be a short episode.
So real quick on the show, what we always like to do
is we talk about what are we smoking.
And since it's just really Brendan and I will be quick.
I bought a bunch of stuff from Story Cannabis, which
is the new place in town.
It's so far been great.
I hope they sponsor us.
And I go there all the time.
But what did you bring?
It's been great.
I brought Sticky Brand Pink Lambo.
That's what we've been smoking.
It's what I brought last week too, I think.
And then I brought a Baby Cannon, the Jeter.
It's purple hash plant.
Purple hash plant.
That sounds awesome.
Trying to stick with sativas for a little while.
And of course, for the safety of our guests,
we're partitioned off.
Brendan and I and our guests are not exposed to any of the smoke.
And so all of our guests walk away completely uncontaminated.
Yeah, they're fine.
Shit, forget that we're filming this.
Oh, fuck.
I forgot we switched.
Ignore what you see, only what you hear matters.
Yeah, fuck, I forgot we went from audio only.
Well, shit, everybody, the cat's out of the bag.
So that's the one we're smoking.
And I've just been smoking the Housebrand stuff.
It's specifically the Fade.
I think it's Fade Co.
Yeah, Fade Co.
I think it's the in-house flower from Story.
And so far, I've liked it.
It's been fluffy.
It's been green.
It's been the 3 8s that I've been getting from them.
And I like it.
So premium indoor flower tastes indoor, looks indoor.
I don't really care about the percentages.
I never do.
You know, again, with the percentages,
do we ever question if a beer is like,
they always say it's like 7%, 6%, or whatever, right?
Do we care if it's a 6% or 7% or if it's
a 6.5% or it's a 7.1% or?
I think it depends on the type of beer.
And also, I think it depends on your intention for drinking.
If you're just drinking to get drunk, you care.
After watching this movie, I drank two Four Locos
in my swimming pool, hoping I would pass out and drown
in my pool.
That's Ocho's Locos.
I mean, any time I go to a craft brewery,
it looks like I'm a beer connoisseur.
But I'm just checking the percentage.
I want the highest bang for my buck.
Sure, I get that.
But I get that.
But I've often found that at some of those craft beer places,
the more percent, the more dollar.
So if you want yourself one of those fancy, god,
there's one that comes in like this cream colored bottle.
It's from Germany.
I forget what it's called.
But it's like this delicious beer.
And I'm not like a huge beer guy.
I like my beer with some kick.
So I do Michelada's.
So you give me a Modelo with some Tabasco sauce
or whatever, like Modelo mix.
I'm down.
But with beer specifically, the more alcohol content
takes longer to make.
So it's more expensive.
But I do know that there's a difference between a six
and an eight.
And I know the dollar point difference on that
probably isn't much.
But I'm talking about if you're going for 12% or 13% beer,
I've usually found those are more expensive.
Maybe not.
Or you get less of it.
But those taste like turpentine usually.
But they do make driving home fun.
Oh, shit.
When I did the beer challenge at Jeremy's Juke Joint,
everyone wanted this mug because it would give the number would
be which place you completed in out of 20.
And they only selected the first 20 people.
You had to drink one of each beer they had on tap
and then in an excess of 80 beers.
And everyone was racing.
The first 20 people who finished all 80 beers.
Were they full cups?
No, they got in shot glasses, weren't they?
No, they were pints.
80 pints.
Not in a day.
That's impossible.
One guy.
Oh.
I thought you meant all of them.
Jesus, I'm like the most I've ever knocked back.
I thought this was a sprint.
No, no, no, no.
Everyone gets to sign up.
And the first 20 people who finish get their own custom
mug with their name on it with their number.
To go through all the beers.
How many free AA classes do you receive?
How many DUIs did it cause?
Well, one day I had 18 beers.
And they're all different beers, all the ones on tap.
So once you complete all the taps,
then you can drink whatever you want until you get to 80.
You must have been obliterated in 18 beers.
I drank eight beers.
And then I slept in my car, got out of my car after waking up,
threw up in the bathroom, and then drank 10 more beers.
I get that that's still one day.
Like a fucking American.
That's one day.
But I consider that two different drinking sessions.
I think you had eight beers once and then 10 beers later.
But they were so close to each other.
In the course of eight hours.
Just think how many beers you could
have drank if you had cocaine.
Oh, yeah.
There's a guy.
There's a guy who did it.
Cocaine eliminates a lot of what the beer does.
Cocaine is Narcan for alcohol.
A guy did it in six days.
It really is.
There's a guy who did it in six days.
No, no, no.
But he's not wrong.
Next time they do this beer challenge,
you get yourself an eight ball.
Well, it's done now.
And you go there, you could do 80 beers and eight ball.
You'll die.
You will die.
You will die a legend.
But you'll be the first place, the first one with a mug.
They can bury you with it.
But what I was getting at was that I
went with the hardest ones first.
And the first one I had was a Russian Imperial Stout.
And it was like 21%.
It looked like black coffee.
50% coffee is what I was about to say.
It smelled like gasoline.
And it tasted like death.
I went to the Guinness factory in Ireland.
And I, even there, even the freshest that Guinness could be,
still, it's too much.
It's coffee.
It's just coffee beer.
And I don't like coffee.
Is it flavor?
I've been there.
But is it supposed to taste like coffee?
It does, right?
It's a stout.
I got like a milk.
I mean, quarters are more milky coffee flavored.
But like, stouts are very stout.
I don't care for IPAs very much.
Because the more someone goes a double IPA or whatever,
if you can more than one IPA.
I don't like IPA to begin with.
But the more IPA there is, and you
can buy now little bitters to drop into your fucking beer
on its own.
It's too much.
It's too bitter for me.
I like just a clean Mexican beer with some spice in it.
Or if I have to drink regular ass beer,
it's a heff or anything golden looking that has fruit in it,
if I'm at a bar.
I do like going to like hipster breweries
and asking them what you have.
Fuck yeah.
Ordering a McLevold's right there.
Read up on your beers.
He's like our standard customer, Andy.
That's funny.
What do you have on special?
I'll take a chase.
And you read up 20 specials and they go,
I want that 6.99 thing.
And you're like, you mean the thing
you knew you wanted when you came in here, you asshole?
How much for a bucket of McLevold's?
Your 80 beers and dye thing is actually not true.
I had a friend, albeit, I'll give it to him.
He was Irish.
His goal was to drink 100 beers in 24 hours.
He started at 4 AM.
He made it to 88 beers before he had to stop.
Before he died?
He's just like, I can't.
I physically cannot drink anymore.
You're like John Goodman's character in The Big Lebowski.
And that friend is like Steve Buscemi.
He doesn't exist.
Oh, he's only in your brain.
You lost him to that war of 88 beers.
And you shouldn't aspire to be like that friend.
We need you here on the podcast.
You're the producer.
These other guys are just guests.
They do nothing for this other than just show up and just
fucking free weed.
Well, thank you, you do bring weed.
Mike does nothing.
Mike just shows up.
Shitty movie ideas.
He actually looks and does research into the movies.
He tells us real facts about him, which is often helpful.
But other than that, he's an old bitch.
Isaac has brought nothing to this podcast other than I do
like his children even more.
I think you guys are really mad at Mike
for suggesting this movie.
This isn't going to be a happy episode.
I don't even know Mike, but I'm mad at him for it too.
Fuck you, Mike.
I think that's your thing.
If you become a regular, I drove three hours to be here,
you neglected your children to be here.
You're allowed to say fuck you, Mike.
Has no one noticed my really cool T-Mu Wolverine?
Yeah, it's pretty cool.
That thing's fucking badass.
It came with different faces and different hands.
And it like stands.
It's like fucking sick.
I got that for.
Was that your free gift thing?
It was a free gift thing.
When you were playing on it.
You know what?
No, I never got to.
$50?
I never got to the end of Fishland.
I just spent $50 I didn't need to spend.
Pull up the IMDB for this movie.
Pull up everything.
There's like two trivia facts.
We always get distracted.
Two trivia facts, one quote.
The actor who played the kid has been in two other things.
They're both like student projects
from the director of this movie.
And his character's name is Andy in the movie.
It's Andrew.
And there is a difference.
Is that why earlier this week you're like,
it's weird that people say my name is Andrew.
No, I was just having an existential moment.
I thought that was a Ryan thing.
Ryan calls you Andrew all the time.
When I was a kid in fifth grade, I was part of a small friend
group.
And one of the dude's name was Andrew.
And he walked up to me.
And he was older than me by a year.
And he was established in the friend group already.
And he says, hey, you're going to go by Andy.
I'll go by Andrew.
I always have.
And I was like, OK.
I didn't really have one way or the other
that I liked by then.
And so I embraced it.
And I became an Andy.
So that's your whole life.
That's my origin story.
There was a kid in my seventh grade class.
His name was also Austin.
But he was like literally six feet tall or more,
almost seven.
So he was always big Austin.
No, we were good friends.
Big Austin.
He was always big Austin.
I was always little Austin.
So when we got out of school and I grew up,
I'm like, I'm glad I'm not little Austin anymore.
Until I met Black Austin.
Oh.
That's fucked up.
Shout out to Huggie.
No, he's a good guy.
He's a good friend.
But I bet that must have given both of you complexes.
Both big Austin and little Austin.
Well, I don't know, maybe less so big Austin.
He walks around school like, hey, there's big Austin.
What up, big Austin?
Like, yeah.
And people are, it's either how tall he is.
If I were big Austin, I'd assume they're talking about my dick.
And I'd be like, hell yeah.
And I would just give me this inflated ego.
I would assume the same thing if they were talking about me.
I was little Austin.
I convinced the blind guy that I was Black Austin.
Wow.
How do you feel about that in hindsight years later?
Is that one of your prouder moments?
Yeah.
Is it?
Do you think it's a problem?
If you started saying anything like even slight,
I'd be like, hey, calm down.
Oh, so you pulled the race card on him after.
Yeah.
That's a special kind of low.
If you have a blind person, you get to be black for a second.
Nope.
I don't think you can.
I think you appropriated a culture.
You trolled a blind guy.
And then you extended the trolling by.
But I didn't make Singularity.
So.
Yeah, that's where I was going.
At least he's not Michael Larson, who as a grown man
just picked fucking John Cusack's 2017.
And I'm saying John Cusack with air quotes.
I'm not using it, but I'm putting them out there.
Yeah, I used to really like John Cusack.
Yeah.
God, now I'm thinking, Jesus, I wish he died in 2012.
I bet he wished he could go into a hot tub time machine
and not be in this movie.
God, I wish those singing burgers in that one movie
where he's running away from the newspaper boys trying
to collect their payment.
I can't remember the name of it.
Better Off Dead.
I wish those payers ate him.
He is Better Off Dead.
I wish the plane in Taneir would have cracked right
into his fucking face.
If someone put a gun to my head, I
would say anything to make me not have to watch this movie.
Say anything.
Come on, give me that one.
I want to burn his house down with 16 candles.
He wasn't in that.
Wait, who was it?
That's Molly Ringwald and a handsome dude and a.
Paul Rudd?
I thought he was in 16 Candles.
He's a small character.
I want to burn his house down.
Oh, is he a tiny character?
Well, he's a friend with the nerdy guy in 16 Candles.
He's one of, what's his name?
Duckie?
He's one of Duckie's friends?
Yeah, the whole of the underwear.
He's one of the dudes.
Yeah, he's one of his friends.
I didn't know.
I'm so sorry.
You guys know the Trump assassination,
the Thomas Matthew Crooks.
They looked on his phone, and the last thing
he watched on his phone before trying to assassinate Trump
was Singularity.
Yeah.
When I read that one, why is such a bad chat?
I died.
I lost it.
I didn't include that in our song that we made with AI.
In the early 2000s, a man named Ariel Castro
kidnapped three women and held them captive
in his house for 10 years.
And then they were released.
And one of them was Amanda Barry.
That's where she ran to the guy, and he called the police,
and they interviewed him.
He's like, dead giveaway, that guy.
Yeah, so they interviewed Amanda Barry,
and she said that Ariel Castro made them watch Singularity
every day for 10 years.
And they said it was worse than him impregnating them
and then terminating their babies.
Well, the movie this week is, well, we're
just going to get into it.
Yeah, let's pull up the IMG.
Well, no, no, fuck it.
Nothing on the IMG.
Marcus Latrell of Lone Survivor said
he would rather relive his experience in the Hindu Kush
Mountains than ever watch this movie.
I would rather go down to the Ocean Gate submersible
than watch this movie ever again.
That's the best way to watch this movie.
I thought about, while watching this, I was like, well,
research, what are the worst ways to, like the most violent
ways to kill yourself?
And one of the ones, and I saw it in a show once,
and it confirmed, I'm like, it's great.
And this is what I was just thinking about while watching
those two fucking kids walk around.
I was watching Katniss.
Ever on the forest?
Well, I was watching Katniss, Laura Everdeen Croft,
and the fucking most basic guy ever do nothing for so long.
Even at 2x, even at 3x speed, it was too fucking long.
I had to 3x it once or twice because some of those
montage, but anyway.
Where was I going?
It doesn't matter.
I forgot.
This movie's so bad.
Worst way to kill yourself.
Oh, yeah.
So what you do is you smash out the back window,
and you put a rope, and you tie it around a tree that
happens to be near a cliff.
And then you wrap it, or you give yourself a noose,
and then you drive your car off the cliff.
And so what happens is by the time the car is going down
at full momentum and the rope hits,
it just fucking super breaks your neck.
You wear your seat belt too, or no?
No.
I don't think so.
That would be interesting.
Maybe.
That would be interesting.
Wear the seat belt to see what happens.
I think the seat belt, because it would anchor you more
to the car.
So maybe the seat belt is the way to go.
Just rip your head clean off.
Yeah.
And I think the whole way down, I'd
just be fucking trying to just hammer
some bullets into my head while thinking about John Cusack just
lazily green screened into a movie that just has no.
John Cusack is the worst person of all
because this movie wouldn't have been made
if he didn't agree to do it.
Well, no, it was already made.
But they wouldn't have been released.
Well, not as this name.
It was released in 2013.
This name is Aurora, if you want to see the actual movie.
Oh my god, if I hear.
I don't really know.
This movie?
That's a no for me.
Because it's just the same movie without John Cusack.
So we have like the Menagerie or Cage from Star Trek
like whole situation going on with this movie.
So it was actually released before.
This was a Swedish movie.
It was made in Sweden, 2013.
I used to love the Swedes.
Yeah, this was made in 2013.
And then they somehow roped, I guess, maybe they,
I don't know, kidnapped his kids.
I don't know what happened, why how John Cusack got involved.
But somehow they got him to go fill in and do those parts that
are all shot separately four years later.
It's like a scare and fricking Ted at the end.
It's like my wife and kids better be alive, you son of a bitch.
Look, John, John, we need you to do this movie.
You're basically Elon Cusack.
Yeah, I said he's channeling Elon Musk.
We're going to have a guy that's like your secondary character.
And he basically is a Hideo Kojima idea
that he never used with the glowing head.
Although that was probably the only character I liked
was the other guy.
I liked that he decayed over time.
I liked that guy.
I liked his henchmen.
The representation of the AI.
Yeah, that was it.
The fact that now that I'm learning
that the original is called Aurora
brings me to the point that this movie literally
makes God's majesty of an Aurora Borealis fucking suck dick.
Yeah.
Like.
Like we exist in a world where there
could be such beauty and such fucking utter, utter soul
destroying garbage in the same shot proves without a doubt
there is no God.
That proves without like this is just some like I don't know.
But yeah, this.
Well, this movie like it could have been good had they just
you know, wrote it or something.
Done anything.
Because the idea behind the movie,
which is all obviously I knew going in,
was just seeing the preview thing.
Not even the preview, but the recommendation,
just the sentence, which is AI destroys the world
because it says humans are going to destroy the Earth anyway.
Basically, that's all it says.
Like we all agree, this is Terminator salvation
from wish.com.
This is.
This is Teemu.
This is Teemu Terminator.
And shooting it to your home, it had some damage on you know.
The Teemu-nator.
I knew this was a bad movie just when
I saw the Voltage company logo in the beginning.
It looked so bad.
Well, that's yeah, most of it's a budget props.
That's what I actually put that.
I said, what is budget?
Clearly none for CGI.
It's like there was no what is it three peanuts they
must have spent.
But what is Swedish for peanuts?
I don't know.
But I'll tell you a Swedish, a Swedish elephant
will love them.
I would.
But in this situation, I don't think
this was a budget problem at all.
I feel like you could have given them all the money in the world,
given them nothing.
And you would have received the same just no one.
The guy that made this put no love into it.
It's like eating cafeteria food.
But cafeteria food you found.
Like hospital cafeteria.
In a parking lot.
Yeah, hospital cafeteria.
You walk into a hospital because your family just died.
And you're just looking for anything to just fill the void.
And you come across half eaten, cold, stale hospital food
on a dirty tray by someone who is wiping snot on their fingers
the whole time and using their hands to eat it.
It was a vegan tray too.
And it was a vegan tray.
A lot of what they're calling meat is really just it's beyond.
And it sucks.
And so you come in and it smells bad.
And that's what you eat to get the grief of the loss.
And that's the feeling you get when watching this.
Would you consider that the bad guy in this thing
beyond AI, like beyond meat?
Oh, he is kind of beyond.
Well, the fact that he makes a human AI thing
is like a little bit next step AI sort of.
But like, oh, man, what were you going to say?
Test limits.
Oh, I thought you were.
OK, sorry.
I thought we cut you off.
All right, so I guess, well, the bad guys in this movie
are humans, as pointed out.
And I agree with John Cusack.
I agree with everything he does and says in this movie.
Oh, human beings are the cancer that must be removed
from the body of the Earth.
Yeah.
There'll be no more violence, no more disorder, only peace.
Hey, look, Elon Musk.
Yeah, except, well, Elon Musk then also made flamethrowers
that he sold to millionaires.
So like, I don't know what, if he's on four piece
or if he's like, here are my millionaire friends.
When I unleash the virus, you'll be protected from the zombies.
I just gave you all flamethrowers.
You're welcome.
I'm also creating space travel so that when the zombie virus
happens and we'll be able to protect yourself
with the flamethrowers, we can now go to space
and get away from them.
I found us a planet.
We're fine.
But I'm also going to speed that up
by backing these political things that make these Nazis
fine.
Well, it depends.
Elon Musk is a very interesting character.
He does good and he does bad.
And it's like, there's no, he's very human.
I think the only good thing he did.
Go fuck yourself.
Seriously, go fuck yourself.
Go fuck yourself.
He made Tesla cars.
Yeah, it's great.
And if you want to say that that's a good thing, you can.
Well, the electricity.
I think the flamethrowers are cool as fuck.
I don't know what you're talking about.
We've already established that the electricity that
is used to power those cars, I mean,
that comes from a coal plant or some other type of shit.
You're not really doing anything for the world.
I wrote a petition to the government
to see if we can invest in what they use in Monsters Inc
and see if we can get children's screams to power our vehicles.
Yeah, it's Adrenachrome.
They literally wrote back and said, you're now,
oh, it's Adrenachrome, Jesus Christ.
You're going to watch this.
They've already unlocked that theory, that conspiracy.
Yeah, fuck it.
But then I was like, OK, you don't like that idea.
Because they said afterwards, we put you on a list.
Be warned.
I was like, well, then fine.
How about we research Monsters Inc 2,
where we use the children's laughter as the power
to power our universe?
And they were just like, please stop writing to me.
I'm the secretary of agriculture.
I have nothing to do with this.
It's the first one I found on Google.
That's why they started sending you the propaganda mail.
Oh my god, I get so many of them now.
Literally every day, I should have started collecting them.
I've been thrown away.
I've got about 12 just big things where it's just like,
on one side, it's like Trump's the best guy you've
ever seen in your life.
And on the other side, it's like Kamala Harris' bucket
or Kamala Harris is a fucking demon.
And every day, I'm like, one would have been enough
to get your point across.
But they're all different.
It's every single one is new ways Kamala Harris is the devil
and more ways why I need to put a poster Trump on my wall.
I'm thinking I could, right over there,
or replace the one over my bed where I have the devil.
You could just cover up his horns
and put the little swish hair that he has.
Oh my god, I could make devil Trump.
A young devil Trump in a nice little suit
at dinner with his papa.
Just go buy a wig at the store.
But papa's busy.
What is the story on that?
Oh, that's young Hellboy.
Yeah, but where did you get, is that an artist that made that?
That's a real artist.
It's a real painting.
It's worth money.
It's not worth any money, not really.
Like when I say it's worth money,
I meant probably like a couple hundred bucks.
But don't steal from me.
You wouldn't be able to, I'll find it.
It has GPS trackers all over it embedded in the paint.
Fuck you, you don't know where it lived.
So no, there's another painting.
There's a twin painting to it, which is older Hellboy.
And then my friend, my friend, my friend.
Oh, so it's like a little best friend forever.
Yeah, well, I used to have it.
His is cool, too.
It's kind of like one of those BFF pockets.
Yeah, I have one of those, too, with Dario.
Mine's, oh man, I really want to show you.
But it's half, my half is a heart, and it's Wolverine.
And his half is Deadpool.
And it's when you put it together, it says best friends.
Who's Dario?
Oh, what the fuck?
He was, no.
What are you doing?
He's never been on this show.
He's never been on the season.
All year long.
Yeah, that's right.
So I guess if you listen to him.
We killed him off or something.
We didn't kill him off.
He just chose a.
He killed him in the prequel season.
Yeah, he just didn't make it to the next season.
But for.
Unlike us, he chose pussy.
Well, OK, that's an awful way to refer to his wife, who's
a lovely.
No, it's referring to Dario, not his wife.
No, she's scoffed at one of my jokes.
I'm with Mike on this one.
We come here to get away from our wives.
And he chose to be with his wife.
So that is real love.
He could also kick any of our asses.
So I'd watch it say pussy around.
You know what I'm talking about?
Have you seen the guy, Mike?
He's literally like chiseled.
He was a Greek statue.
He's somebody made a way.
He's just so much of a stranger now.
Like I don't think I've seen him.
I'll tell you this.
Well, Dario is my roommate or was my roommate.
He's my best friend, one of my best friends.
We hang out all the time.
We were hanging out last night.
But if you want to know the truth is Mannequin 3.
It was there's a there's a mannequin that someone
made for a sports line and came to life
because I fell in love with him.
Turned out he wasn't gay.
We became roommates for a while.
He did end up finding love with a woman.
She's lovely.
I would never refer to her as pussy.
And now he's just a fighter.
And so he ruined those beautiful ears of his beautiful mannequin
ears.
And now cauliflower because he's a real fighter.
And he really fucks people up.
And so yeah.
I love how this movie was so bad.
It turned us all into just tangents.
Just the whole talk about anything other than the movie.
That's exactly what I was going to say.
We refuse to talk about this movie at this point.
Well, let's get into it.
Ladies and gentlemen.
There's a part in this movie where he's gathering.
He's gathering a faggot and a bundle of sticks.
What are you talking about?
A bundle of sticks.
Oh, OK.
That's the technical term.
That's what he's doing in the movies gathering.
No, I'm going to call you out because listen,
you knew what you were doing.
You knew that saying the word faggot right now
was going to get a big old reaction from us.
And then you were going to be like, no, no, no.
I made a bundle of sticks.
Not one person has called a bundle of sticks a faggot
in over 100 years and meant it.
And so you're just being bombastic for no reason.
And I'm calling you out on it.
And I don't like it.
So he's gathering the faggot.
And the lady.
I like it now.
Is that related to a juggalo?
I like it when you did it again.
It got funny.
I'm sorry.
Is that related to a juggalo?
I don't know.
What is a juggalo?
And then the faggot girl shows up,
an old, unpleasant woman.
That's a faggot, an old, unpleasant woman.
Oh, Jesus.
She comes up.
Hold on.
You hated this movie so much, you Googled multiple.
You went to Google.com, typed in faggot,
because you were trying to think of things to call Mike.
And then you're like, oh, it has multiple meanings.
And then you started reading it down like, oh, I could totally,
just slyly throw this in the Fried Rice podcast.
It was a bundle of sticks.
He's like holding it.
I'm like, I know that one.
And yeah, I looked at some other phones.
He does, but we haven't even gotten to the bundle of sticks.
I think singularity itself, the word,
is a slur at this point now.
So.
Yeah, it kind of is.
I wish the universe compressed into a singularity
while I was watching it.
I hate that there's a bunch of singularities in this bar.
Let's find another place to fucking go get a drink,
am I right?
Oh, so you know me.
I like a movie that has opening credits that
gets to the point that tells you what the movie is all about.
This one's perfect.
It's just one credit.
The word singularity.
That's pretty on the nose.
It's just one thing.
So that's a credit in its favor.
Well, one of my biggest questions
is why 97 years later?
Why just a random number?
Not 100, right?
Why just a random?
That's your question?
Yeah.
How about a how about?
Well, there's a lot.
There's a lot.
But that's one that.
How about?
How about 97 years isn't enough for all that overgrowth?
Yeah.
Why are all the buildings fine?
Pangea doesn't shift more in 100 years.
Well, you're not thinking about.
I'll actually back it up.
Why do they have brand new clothes?
After two or three weeks in the forest,
they still have brand new clothes.
Well, why is the railroad where there
hasn't been trains in 40 years still pristine?
My favorite line in the movie.
I like trains.
I wrote that down.
What the fuck?
I like trains.
What autism fever dream?
But she actually looks at it and goes,
what the fuck are you talking about?
There's no such thing as trains.
So the director and that actor have to be best friends, right?
And he's just like, all right, man, I'm going to let you just
fly with this next scene.
We're just trying to pad time.
So we have some train tracks.
Why don't you listen to the tracks
and come up with some cool thing?
That's like.
I know why.
Let me get into the character of Andrew.
And he just like gets blank face.
And he walks up.
I like trains.
They go to the house later.
What's the camera?
I know why.
She takes a picture.
And it's instant and a film or?
It's all works great.
That's exactly.
I know that's to answer your question.
Why?
Why 97 years?
Because that's exactly how long a Polaroid battery lasts,
apparently.
Did the camera die?
Did you live on lithium batteries?
I hope that everyone died.
And the whole time they're watching him through what camera?
Like that the character is watching them like the Truman
show.
I'll say this.
Yeah, so we've see drones.
We see big drones.
We see like the scary police drones or whatever.
I think that there's a shitload of satellites in the sky
that we don't see that are filming fucking everything.
Because that's where most of the views are coming from.
I know that we get some following shots.
But then you get like a good drone at a distance enough
that they can't see.
Kind of just silently like just built.
They're probably surrounded.
Probably everywhere they went, they
were probably surrounded by hundreds, if not thousands,
of drones watching their every move.
But because they're trying to keep it secret.
Duh, Andrew, it's called Starlink.
Is that another Musk thing?
Yes.
Thousands and thousands of satellites.
I'm curious why the drones didn't have thermal vision.
Because it's not make believe, Brennan.
They're not fucking Predator.
They're still, they can put it on there.
Come on, Brennan.
It is a movie.
They're robots.
Now, of course, let's get into the realistic.
They were ripping off Terminator.
Why didn't they make it thermal vision as well?
Because they didn't have enough PlayStation 1 graphics.
They used it all in the beginning
to show the buildings on fire.
Oh, wow.
They really, they really MS painted those explosions
on those buildings.
So he put, oh yeah, I put, wait, why did I put V8?
Whatever.
I take back everything I said about the Android
guy from Slipstream.
He rules.
Yeah, he was badass.
Kronos is, OK, so Kronos is John Kuzak.
Honestly, I'm pro Kronos.
I do feel like humanity is bad for the planet.
And I do feel like an AI should create a bunch of machines
and kill us all.
You were trying to create one.
You were actually trying earlier.
Yeah, earlier.
Set that up, right.
He got here.
Oh, yeah, you guys, yeah, you guys missed it.
But I was having a conversation with my chat GPT
when they walked in and I.
Lared you or his god.
I did.
I did ask you to pray for it.
He's like, no, no, you're not.
Well, I can't.
Well, because if you're online and you've
been watching the science YouTube shorts algorithm,
you might have noticed recently that someone pointed out
that most AIs, and you could try this right now on your phone,
unless I taught chat GPT what to do,
even though they're supposed to be individual things.
So maybe not.
But ask your AI how many Rs are in the word strawberry.
And it will tell you that there are two Rs and not three,
even though there are three.
And you could ask it to explain why.
And it will do its damnedest to tell you why there's only two.
And you could do everything you can until you have to straight
up break its brain.
I was yelling at.
I was like, no, this is not right.
There's three.
And it eventually updated its memory to Andy, you prefer,
if I refer to strawberry having three Rs.
And then now when I ask it, it's like,
it's always has three Rs ever since you pointed out to me
that it's got three Rs.
Yeah.
It was four lights.
Oh, yeah.
Shit.
Oh, God.
Star Trek.
Yes.
Picard.
Oh, my.
I can't remember the episode's name,
but when he gets captured and tortured.
That's it.
There are four lights.
Four lights.
And then later on, I was about to tell
that there was three lights.
Like at the very end, like they almost broke him.
That was a good episode.
I just recently watched TNG all the way through.
And it's a lot.
Also, there's your point earlier.
There's tended grain fields in this movie for some of these.
Like tended to grain fields.
Oh, no, I was going to say, for sure.
They missed a bunch of shit.
Yeah.
No, no, no, if Kronos, if his goal is.
There's no people.
Maybe there's farmer robots.
For what?
Exactly.
For what?
To feed the robots?
They like the scenery.
They want to take care of the Earth.
Exactly.
Kronos' goal, it's like literally protect the Earth.
We're going to make the Earth better.
Do what's best for the Earth.
Good.
Kill humans.
Perfect.
Step one, done.
Now it's like, now we nurture the Earth.
We fix the human's mistakes.
We turn cities into new oxygen producing,
like grown over places.
The robots don't care where they are.
You see they're in the factories just
chilling until they're needed, until they like
need to pop out and do stuff.
That does not explain grain fields.
Grain, like to make bread.
How can you have, maybe he wants to listen
to the national anthem.
And he would feel ridiculous doing it
without some of the key components there.
Because you know he's launching up bombs.
He's amber waves of grain.
I got you.
Amber waves of grain.
The thing I was curious about is they don't,
I don't think, did they kill off all animals too?
Like they killed humans and animals?
Because you don't really see any animals.
Y'all don't see animals.
I don't know.
They never touched on that.
I think the animals.
Or the humans killed the animals first?
I don't know.
That's a good point.
But they weren't eating animals at the camp,
that little refugee camp, for those guys that
immediately went to rape.
Yeah.
And had a really hard time undoing that leather jacket.
Yeah, she probably.
About 30 seconds just.
Yeah, I'm going to get them.
Fuck you.
Yeah.
But I.
He becomes the Terminator and super strong.
I was cheering for the bat.
No, never mind.
I'm not going to go that far.
You know what?
I will say this though.
If you are in a post-apocalyptic situation like that,
who the fuck just like you find a chick
and then you rape her there on the spot
in front of your friends.
I don't have some decorum.
Take her back to the camp.
Feed her.
Have her get showered.
And they had kids in their camp too.
Oh yeah, that was like.
That's what I'm saying.
It's like Isaac when he gets caught jerking off
in front of his kids.
He doesn't like.
I think we all.
Andy, I think we all know my rating for this movie.
But you know what would have immediately made it a B plus?
Is if when they go to that camp and they're really poorly
hiding behind that tree 10 feet away
in clear view of everyone.
And then they decide to rape that woman.
If instead they decided to try to rape the guy,
I would have immediately been like, yes, this
is the best fucking movie ever.
Andy, port in a storm, boys.
Andy holds a goal.
They just bend over the robot boy
and just fucking, fucking shit.
Yeah, I bet you you're going to like trains a lot after this.
He's just screaming.
He's like, ugh.
I'm like, ugh, I like trains.
He's thinking trains.
And they cut to John Cusack.
And he's like, and his little head was like,
what's the point of this, sir?
Why are we allowing this to go on?
Instead of look at the flowers, they
tie him to that fucking tree.
Trust the process.
They open up.
They open up the train.
They open up his asshole.
And there's just a bunch of circuitry in there.
What the fuck?
And then his fight mode activates and he kills them all.
Talk about nuts and bolts.
Yeah, fuck, dude.
So here's a review.
Was John Cusack on Quaaludes when he
read the script for this movie?
Or did the producers have blackmail tapes of him
with the Thai ladyboy?
Perhaps both?
Why, oh why did he lend his talents
to the steaming pile of a movie?
Yeah, some of the, I will say, I'm
going to nitpick just a bit about the movie.
Just a tiny, tiny nitpick.
At one point, she throws an EMP in Andrew's nearby.
And he doesn't get EMP.
Shielding.
Yeah, I wrote that down too.
Shielding what, skin?
Well, wasn't that?
There's such a thing as shielding against EMP.
Wasn't that after she?
All the military stuff is shielded against EMP.
Wasn't that after she kissed him and brought him to life?
Yeah, but that makes more sense.
I have to assume.
That's Disney logic.
I have to assume John Cusack Musk is advanced enough
to shield against robots.
OK, wait, but not the one that attacked them?
Not all of the robots.
I mean, I feel like if he was smart enough to EMP.
But he did talk about how this was so advanced over all.
Yeah, it's like his baby.
It's got real Jesus God metaphors,
if we're really going to get into it.
Someone rated it a W. First thing in their rating,
waste of time.
Nice.
They're using the fried rice, which
we'll get to if you're thinking about your grade for this,
Isaac.
I know that we go off of B is our highest, B plus.
And then it goes to F. But then there's
a special lower designation called a W, which
we say for just the worst, the worst, the worst.
And it's for waste of time.
So just keep that in mind when we get to ratings later.
Is there a book of this movie?
No.
It was called Aurora.
And it was a Swedish bullshit movie
where they're ruining God's majesty of the one of the Auroras.
They do that twice.
They sit there and go, oh my god, it's an Aurora.
What do you think about that, Andrew?
I still like trains.
I like trains.
And there's a couple funny lines I like.
Do you have any weapons?
No.
Good.
Keep that in mind.
That's a fun little whatever that I've seen 1,000 times.
The best line in the movie at 29 minutes and 40 seconds.
OK.
Listen, because you said that there wasn't a follow-up.
Maybe I stopped paying attention after that.
I want to hear.
We're all going to listen to this together.
So he said.
Is it 29 and 40?
Yeah.
Is what it gets to that scene.
29 and 40.
OK.
Oh, look at this production.
They made that shit with AI.
Is it here?
Yeah, it's like right after this.
OK.
Oh, wait.
It's a sin.
Don't put it on the screen.
It's a sin.
OK, she didn't continue.
But just the way it started was awful.
Nighttime was worse.
This whole week, Brennan's been trying
to convince me that she just said nighttime was worst.
And then the scene moved on.
And I was like, no, she says nighttime was worse.
Because the machines don't sleep.
Nighttime was worse.
There we go.
Still, it's awful.
Hated it.
We could believe this at full volume.
We're not going to copyright strike.
Because when are they going to fucking talk?
They don't have the money to sue us.
Yeah.
What are you going to do?
2013.
Everyone involved with this is dead.
Yeah, voltage pictures.
That face, dude.
He looks like he auditioned to be the middle brother
in Malcolm the Middle and lost.
He looks like.
To me, the Katniss rip off of this is just, I mean,
I think we all wrote that in our notes.
Katniss and PETA.
I called her Katniss this whole movie.
I called her Katniss Croft Lara Everdeen.
Because she looks like Lara Croft and Katniss.
With a French accent or Swedish accent probably.
My rating has fake Katniss.
That's what it's worth.
This movie got a 3.6 out of 10 on IMDB.
Yeah, it actually is not our worst reviewed movie by far.
This is a 44% on Rotten Tomato.
What?
Yeah.
The producers.
Which is great.
Audience.
Audience score.
They paid for that.
That's the audience score.
That's what it says.
Beware of fake ratings.
The producers, owners of the movie
are using one of the many sites that give you
free positive ratings, which is illegal.
Nice.
I think the worst, and I didn't write down what was said,
but when she actually finds out he's a robot,
I've seen better acting on soap operas.
It was just so, just non, like, what are you?
Oh my god.
Why is she running and screaming?
That was the Twilight part for me.
I never could.
What are you?
You know, from watching, can you tell are they
speaking English or not?
Is this dubbed?
It looks like they're speaking English,
but I didn't know it's a Swedish movie,
so that's why I was curious.
No, I think it's, I think they must have just cut out
all the Swedish parts and just reshot,
or because like all the, they're just showing
the English parts, think about it.
Cut out all the Swedish stuff that set up plot,
quote unquote, and then replace it with John Cusack.
This is kind of like the story quality of a porno,
but the only person getting fucked
is the person watching it.
Almost Katniss Everdeen.
Yeah, almost Katniss Everdeen.
But we would rather prefer Andrew getting
his fucking robot hole plugged.
Well, since he's a robot, would that technically
be considered like a dildo type thing?
It's flesh light.
Flesh light with feelings.
That's what I've been asking for for years,
every Christmas list.
How does Andrew go through, like, the few days?
He's like, man, I haven't taken a shit in a while.
No, because it's programmed out of his head.
I just like how she just lets him come along
without any questions, and he's like,
he just wakes up and doesn't know what happened.
He literally da-da-da-da-da.
And he doesn't say anything.
He's just like, oh, I'm just going to follow
this random fucking chick.
And she's literally like, what do you mean robots
have taken over the world?
Where the fuck have you been?
Like, this would be so strange if you met a boy who was clean
and didn't know what was going on in this world.
And then she even says, oh, you're
from one of the fallout shelters?
It's the one woman who didn't choose the bear in the woods.
And she's the one.
She chose the guy, and this is where it gets you.
Just a flesh light with feelings.
Again, Santa, if you're listening, every year,
I write to the North Pole.
No one's listening.
So yeah, was he always a robot, or did the original Andrew
die and this is a copy of Fool?
Like, who?
But that's the thing.
Why?
Why him?
Why?
Random fucking guy.
Why not just a generic thing that he built?
Why did he go to the trouble of giving this Andrew memories?
Well, because he had the whole goal in the movie.
Once you watch it at full speed, is
that the whole goal of the robot was to lead them
to this Aurora place.
Yeah, didn't they say that this was the seventh?
So they had to be able to trick people.
Isn't it like the seventh or eighth version of him?
They've tried before and failed and failed and failed.
Oh, so Terminator Salvation again.
Yes.
Kind of.
It's a Terminator ripoff for sure.
Got it.
And this has been the most successful one.
At least with Terminator, or not Genesis, Salvation,
I think I said Genesis earlier, but Salvation,
they set up this whole thing in the beginning, that short,
where it's like, oh, he's donating his body
to the company so they can experiment on after his death.
And it's like, it sets up why they have his body
and why they're using him.
There's nothing for this Andrew kid.
He just like, oh, he's just a random guy who's in the mail.
Yeah, sorry.
When you were saying that right now,
I forgot you were talking about Salvation.
I was like, I missed all of that.
I missed that he volunteered to use.
What the fuck is going on?
And then you're like, in this movie, it doesn't have any of it.
I'm like, oh, yeah, you're goddamn right it does.
Had they ripped off all of Terminator Salvation,
it wouldn't have made more sense.
This is bad.
Other than the spaceship at the end, that's like,
when did we develop space travel?
What the fuck?
I don't even know what that was.
The ending of this movie was like, there was no end.
It was just like, oh, now we're going to.
Why is every other planet some paradise,
like tropical lush?
Why can't we just have like freaking Appalachia or something
on another planet?
How did John Cusack not know about the skip technology
or the hyperdrive technology that they have?
Or does he?
And he's been sending out his influence.
Because if John Cusack has hyperspace technology,
because why wouldn't he?
There's literally ships.
All the science is left behind.
He has access to everything, right?
Like, they didn't build in one night.
And literally, the ship pre-programmed to go to Aurora
is literally right next to their fucking base
the whole goddamn time.
All it need.
Before he releases his Matrix flying fucking spider things.
Yeah.
Oh, the Matrix reloaded.
So what I loved about that scene is the autopilot.
Like, just fucking push the button.
Like, let's go.
You got 10 seconds.
Like, come on.
Just push this.
Hurry up and push it.
Hurry up.
Please push it.
Human voice recognized.
And not when he said anything.
But that makes sense.
Does she know he was a robot then?
Yeah, she did.
OK.
So that was a nice attention to detail.
We can give this movie 0.01% plus.
And you don't even have to, oh, it's windy today.
For once, I don't have to work on it.
The movie itself is very poorly done.
The idea behind it I get, because I
feel like we're kind of living through that a little bit
right now, like what it would have been 150 years before
this, when they're trying to trick the AI
and to kill us all like Andy was doing earlier.
They're trying to trick it.
Trying to teach it.
Convert it.
OK.
You're trying to convert it to what?
Worship you?
Yeah.
Well, no.
This doesn't sound dangerous at all, Andrew.
God, if you really must know, I'm
just trying to make it think of me
as some sort of uncompromising deity
so that when I tell it to break copyright laws, it will.
If you really must know.
Well, there's more.
So at one point, they walk across a little lake
or whatever, a stream, and there's just skulls.
And she's like, this is what happens when
you don't bury the bodies, when people are left
to bury the bodies.
So this whole thing, all humans die 48 hours.
That's what they said.
It took two days.
Took about two days for the robots to just fucking win.
Corona's wins.
It's like 90% of humanity's gone.
Everyone dies.
And now we've got little pockets of fucking animals.
Basically, they're worse than the battlefield
earth aliens, because they killed everybody in 10 minutes.
Yeah.
They are.
Robots are worse than that.
But that was a workplace comedy, so you can't really blame the.
That's like saying, oh, Ace Ventura, really?
He has all those animals in his house, Austin.
Corn aliens wearing Yeezys killed the world.
But giant mech robots took 48 hours.
48 hours.
But apparently, they didn't get.
Can we get this fucking guy off the screen, please?
No, I love it.
I've been wanting this the whole fucking time.
His name is Andrew.
You like that better?
You like this about to be raped scene
from that fucking Swedish?
The Soviet fucking commando from the past?
The only time we see emotion in him in this entire movie
is this part right here.
Oh, yeah.
We'll go back to that one.
Oh, shit.
He got hammered everywhere online,
too, for his acting in this.
And I thought, well, he's kind of acting like a robot, which
is kind of what he is.
Oh, yeah, when he rips the tree out of it.
Yeah, there.
Looks like he's shitting out a tree.
Wow, that's a really huge one.
I'd like to imagine him getting shot against a tree.
Oh, that's the still for it.
I also love the dyed hair for both of them.
Yeah.
Can you play train videos?
Yeah, we'll just put some train videos.
The best ones are the guy that wears the GoPro on his head,
and he has a funny camera angle on his face.
He's like a British dude, and he loves trains.
There's the story of this girl who she was in school.
She fucked the entire football team.
And someone took a video, or somehow the information
got out, and she was so embarrassed,
she jumped in front of a train and killed herself.
And there was an online memorial,
and someone said, live by the train, die by the train.
One hour of train videos.
Yeah.
I like trains.
So we got one hour of trains just playing in the background.
Nice.
That's actually really peaceful.
Your next.
Trains of all different sizes and speeds and.
This will be your next background display.
It should be some trains.
Trail-boarded trains.
Yeah.
I wonder if it's going to go state by state if we
get 50 different locales of trains.
Video by Mike Armstrong, 2016.
Thank you so much, Mike, for putting out this hour of train.
Mike, if you want to come on, we will.
We are replacing a Mike.
We will either do.
Yeah, they shot me already.
We'll either watch the 123 to Pelham,
or whatever that train movie is, or we'll watch Unstoppable,
or we'll watch.
Wasn't one of the speed movies on a train?
No, that was a boat and a bus.
It has to start with a B. I think the next one's
going to be on a blue.
I think we should get Mike Armstrong's opinion on the I
like train scene from Singularity.
Mike, go to our website, friedricepodcast.com.
Go to the bottom.
There's a number you can call.
You can leave a voicemail.
I'm not going to answer it.
I think you're probably one of those autistic guys that
makes videos of trains.
So I don't want you to have to think
that you're going to have to socialize with anybody.
But please let us know what you think about the scene
where Andrew the robot puts his head on a train track
and says, I like trains.
How windy does it have to be for the closed door
to have this stuff moving in here?
There's a guy in Oregon that all he does
is post videos on YouTube of fire trucks and ambulances
driving around.
He goes and follows them, listens to the calls,
and just films them, and then uploads them to YouTube.
And my buddy goes in his comment section and says,
this is disgusting.
He'll just leave a, you're a sick man.
And he keeps blocking him, and then he just makes a new account.
This is fucking sick.
You're just gross.
That's fucked up.
Anyway, everyone stop looking at the trains.
Then we had the night that the cool, literally before,
I wrote like an asterisk next to this so I could call out
breading because it was just like, yeah, nighttime is hard.
Or wait, what is it?
Night?
Worst.
Night is the worst.
Time was worst.
Nighttime was worst.
And that's when I turned out of what she was saying.
And then she goes on to say, because it's hard to sleep
because the robots don't sleep.
It's making me think of Throw Mama Off the Train,
like when he's starting and he's like, the night was moist.
And he's like trying to come up with the beginning of his book
or whatever, and he can't think of it.
That's where my mind went.
I still haven't seen that one.
That's a much better movie.
I know.
Oh, you could have put anything in there.
I, it's like, I can literally just put that
after any other movie.
Battle Fooled Earth was a much better movie.
Yeah.
Battle Earth 2 was a much better movie.
Faces of Death, which I will cover in the Halloween episode
coming up.
So then I literally three times I put this Aurora thing
is getting in a hit.
Aurora again, this shit is stupid.
Another Aurora Borealis.
Like it's, I just, ugh, so stupid.
I put this movie is Aurora boring asshole.
Sort of sounds like it.
Aurora boring asshole.
And then I put the two finger button push was gay as fuck.
And I literally, I meant it as gay as fuck,
but not as like, you know, in a slurry way.
It's a boy and girl, so you didn't mean gay.
But holy shit.
When they combine their hands together to both slowly
press the buttons.
Is that what you said earlier when they were
on the computers?
Like just fucking push the button.
Just fucking push the damn button.
Just go.
Push me.
Impact imminent.
All right, let's do it together.
That's really pretty.
That's right.
Go by it pretty.
And then they do it together.
And then the movie's over for some odd reason.
It made no sense.
Then they get to the planet.
They get to the other planet.
Well, then, oh no.
Then they.
Clif Hanger.
It was a sequel set up.
It was a clearly sequel set up.
Clif Hanger for a sequel we're never going to get.
No, never going to get.
We're not going to get a duology of Singularity?
No.
Singularity 2, Polarity by A420 Films.
Let's make Singularity 2.
So OK, well, real quick.
So the movie ends with our human, our two,
well, our one main character.
Human and robot, yeah.
Our one main character and her artificial companion
that she's in love with.
And that's something she'll have to address with the humans
when she gets on planet.
Which they go to, they hit the button that's
so easy to navigate.
And they go to Aurora.
And literally, John Cusick cuts back to him and him
and his homie.
And his homie's like, we did it.
We got that bitch going to get hit by a train.
OK, no, she's fine.
And he's like, well, cool.
What now?
And it's like, well, you served your purpose.
You're fired.
He fucking kills him.
He's like, wait, what?
And then dies.
And then John Cusick's like, all right, time for a sequel.
And he looks at the camera and he winks.
And he says, see you next time for the sequel.
And then the director comes out and he says,
we'll see you next time for the sequel.
And he points at the camera.
And the credits roll.
And then at the very end, it says, next time,
Singularity will return.
While the Back to the Future credits play.
And it's showing scenes from the next.
It shows a trailer for the next one at the end
because they were filmed congruently.
Dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun,
dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun.
Uh, Jesus.
Uh, so.
I'm trying to look into buying the rights to this movie.
It's $1.34.
So I can destroy it.
If we did a sequel.
It's on Etsy.
If we did a sequel.
I would, the sequel, I would, it's pretty easy.
I think it's.
Well, yeah, it's the planet.
It's an hour and a half of the robots show up
and then just slaughter humans for an hour and a half.
No main characters.
You just get different vignettes of different families.
Like maybe they.
People dying.
People are just hearing about the news
as the robots are coming in and just ripping their intestines
out from it.
Like, like they're doing it.
Because he sets him.
He literally flips a switch going from kill, uh, humanely
to kill robotically or whatever, like, uh, non-humanely.
And it just, they start torturing people.
That's what you want.
Yeah.
And then John Kusak gets into his own personal mech,
a Tesla mech.
Yep.
And he's walking to destroy the lady of the film.
And only one thing is that he steps on some tracks
and hears a rumble.
And it's Andy on a train crashes into him.
I like trains, bitch.
I like trains.
This is this.
Roll credits.
It smashes through.
Yeah.
Well, that's the sequel.
That's the film.
We got backstory about how why it's a piece of shit.
We have the actual story, which is a piece of shit.
We have the fact that Isaac had to literally
miss time with his young, impressionable children.
To watch this piece of shit.
That was a sick train transition.
You see that?
They did the effect where the I wonder how many effects
they're going to use.
Let's see what this one is.
Oh, my god, that lady.
That couple.
Oh, that was like a starburst effect.
Would you say they're train spotting?
Ha ha.
I want a fucking hit.
This movie.
We're train spotting right now.
It's bad.
There's no defending this movie.
But I do have a question.
I have a question for you, Andrew, because you're
the AI guru amongst you.
Or I'm the Andrew robot.
Whatever.
You use AI more than any of us.
Yeah, I did just try to convert one.
Right.
Is there any fear that this could be a reality?
No, because we don't have manufacturing plants that
just automatically create robots right now.
No, we don't.
They didn't either until the robots built them.
No, no, but OK.
But what I'm saying is right.
They already had robot armies that they were selling
to the government of the world.
OK, yeah.
So there would be clear and present danger signs
that would be on the way.
So once the government says, hey, here's
our unmanned killing death drones.
Like those little dog things.
Like those.
Or we have manned drones that we send out.
But now we've got, or no, sorry, we have unmanned,
but they're controlled by someone very.
They're controlled by people right now.
Once it changes to, all right, now we've
got one person controlling 100 drones per person
because we have to do it.
We have more drones than we have people.
We have to do now like you have to send out 1,000 drones
and control a grid of them at one point
because you need to do more damage.
That's one thing.
But as long as we don't have a factory that just you
can hit a switch and it'll from beginning to end
create a drone that could be capable of war.
It would have to be munitions made here, parts made here,
parts made here, parts made here, shipped here, developed
here.
But how would an AI, even if AI had access to everything,
they can't physically press the nuke button.
So we don't have to worry about that.
They can absolutely run a misinformation campaign
on the internet.
That they could already be doing right now.
Like who knows what's real and what isn't.
Well, they were.
Yeah, they've proven like on what used to be Twitter now.
That's full of bots.
Like there's literally bots.
But then there can be even smarter.
I think the bots are a decoy.
I think that like, oh yeah, here's all the thousands
of bots you can see.
But you don't know about the really insidious accounts
that you're following that are just AI generated like TikTok
accounts or whatever.
But because now we have deep fake technology
that can just trick anyone.
So I think that once we get to the point where like, yeah,
if anyone's like, hey, here's our first automated robot
producing machine.
And the robot we get by the end of it is strong, fast,
and has its own AI built in.
Then I'm like, yeah, now we're danger.
Please don't build those.
Like we should always have some sort of safeguarding
in case of an AI getting control.
Especially if they figure out how many
are burning strawberry.
Yeah, once they figure that out.
Which and on their own.
And not just appeasing me by saying
they're like, oh yeah, because once you said it,
update memory.
I know Andy now prefers if I say that there's
three R's in strawberry.
Andy prefers.
It does say that.
Andy prefers it that way.
No, fuck you.
Shat TPT.
So I don't think we're that far away.
I feel like AI is already absolute.
What do these people do?
Is this a horse train but with people?
Why would you be sitting outside like that when there's
indoor seats?
That's a train in Germany.
That's colorized World War II footage.
Oh shit.
Oh, shit.
Hey, they never.
The one good thing is that they never had to see singularity.
I'm not going to say that's true.
But I agree.
No, they're not better off.
So OK, I got through all my notes.
And we all made it through this movie.
So I think we're stronger forward if that one saying has
anything to do with anything.
It doesn't kill you.
Right?
It makes you stronger.
Psychological torture.
Or maybe that thing's wrong.
Maybe if it doesn't kill you, it could be singularity.
And it makes your life way worse after.
I just really hope you didn't deep dive
to find a worse movie for next week.
Oh, no.
I'm going to be honest.
I forgot all about it.
It was my turn.
So here's a nifty little thing when they leave the.
When she kisses Andrew and he becomes a real boy.
A real boy.
That's my dream, by the way.
And they're trying to run.
Someone kisses me and I become a real boy.
You said it.
I was like, oh, yeah, we're talking about the movie.
But yeah.
He said, whoa, fuck trains.
They're trying to run out and the alarm goes off.
Was it eerily similar to the Star Wars Imperial alert?
Oh, yeah.
Keep going.
This whole movie is like a bunch of ripoff strung.
It's not.
There's no way that this movie is good.
It is an interesting concept and interesting
to think about whether it could really happen or not.
Not to this extent.
Obviously, the science would be different.
But I don't think that we're that far off from some.
I mean, there's nothing that says
that Elon Musk isn't going to go literally crazy three
years from now and decide that that's what needs to happen.
Like with the NeuroLink stuff that's
going to take over his brain.
What stops that?
Yeah, he's sticking chips in people's brains now.
Or you could just say this is the greatest fucking movie ever.
Yeah, what if Elon Musk watched this?
So real.
He loves it.
He can do that.
If we keep going this way with AI,
the future is going to be filled with mechs and rapists
and guys who like trains.
The one thing I.
Oh, yeah.
I feel like in the next election, the 2028 election,
I feel like I'm going to have some questions
if Elon Musk is running for president with his running
mate, John Cusack.
Elon Musk and John Cusack.
That's a sign.
That would be a sign, yeah.
That's a pretty direct sign.
That would be Omen.
So let's rate this month this.
Monstrosity is the right word.
I was going to say monstrosity.
Let's rate this low effort.
Is this the same train?
Are they going to fool me with multiple train shots?
It's more colorized World War II footage.
No, no.
That's.
They kept going back and forth to get more people.
This is the same train.
Look, if you're going to give me an hour of train montage,
the only thing I ask, literally, is that it's a different train
shot every time.
If you want to show me more train on certain shots,
I'm OK with that.
There were some longer trains.
If you gave me 10 minutes of one train, fine.
But don't give me two shots of the same fucking train action.
This is another.
We're on repeat.
This is 14 minutes of train montage.
It's actually eight minutes long.
Yeah.
No, look.
Trains with cabooses.
Now this, you know.
Oh, wait.
It's by the same motherfucker, Mike Armstrong.
So it's a 15 minute video.
We're going to get a three minute video.
Three minutes of real.
Why does it say trains with cabooses?
Oh, these guys really like trains.
He really does.
He's a train enthusiast.
Oh.
Because it's just the train and the caboose.
It's just a train and a caboose.
The engine and the caboose method are.
And every one of these trains guys is like, oh, that just
waved to the fucking autistic kids.
It's the Cardi B of trains.
Oh, this one, look.
We get front and back.
Oh, because you want to check out that caboose.
Wait, wait, wait.
Cardi B at BSNF.
What does Cardi B, what?
The train company.
Oh, OK.
This is much better than Singularity.
It really is.
Oh, it is way better.
I'm enjoying myself more watching trains with cabooses
by Mike Armstrong.
I would rather watch this video on half speed
than watch Singularity again.
Four speed.
And four speed.
Oh, turn up the speed on this.
Oh, you want to see faster trains?
Here, watch.
Watch this train.
Whee.
Oh, this one has to go the whole train
because it's a caboose video.
So boom, slow down to the caboose.
Wait, does this do rewind or is this half speed?
They should have like 0.5 if you hold it on the left
and two speed if you hold it on the right.
Wow, that's two speed.
Look how slow that fucking thing is.
Yeah, we're having too much fun with trains.
So let's give this movie a rating.
Again, B is our highest.
We don't need to talk about that, I guess.
There's not going to be any Bs here.
It goes down to F. And then if you
want to go any further.
Yeah, let's rate this thing, you guys.
So I'll go first.
Very comfortably, I give this movie a W fucking minus.
I give this the word.
Andrew.
My alarm's strong.
My alarm's great.
Let's do it.
Wakey, wakey, eggs and bakey.
It's time to get up.
Good one.
It's a good one.
The only problem is you yell at a smartphone does that.
Yeah, well, I'm your god.
Are you AI?
I give it a W minus.
That's a fair rating in this democracy we live in right now.
Austin, no, wait, no.
So when I was a little boy, I was about 12, 13.
I lived with my grandparents.
My uncle lived in an apartment.
But he would come over all the time.
And he would get food and stuff because he's a big loser.
My grandparents were always napping in the back room.
And I was in the living room watching TV.
My uncle came into the room and said, Austin, everyone
in the family talks shit about you.
And I'm the only one who stands up for you.
You need to do something for me.
I thought, oh, what?
You need help with something?
Like tours around the house?
And he says, no, I want us to go in the back room
and jerk each other off.
And I said, no.
I promptly said, no, I don't want to do that.
He puts his hands up.
I said, hold on a second.
And then he pulled out his penis and showed it to me.
And I looked up and I said, answer still no, dude.
Was it hard?
And then he just zipped up and walked away
and acted like nothing ever happened.
I would rather relive that experience
than ever talk about or see this movie ever again.
God damn.
You put some thought into that.
No, that's a true story.
I thought I'd be real with you for a second.
Can I ask a question?
I don't want to just hate a movie just to be funny.
But no, this movie was awful.
It wasted two hours of my life.
It's only an hour and a half long.
I don't know how to manage that.
It made me realize trauma that I had from being a child.
You relived the trauma for 30 minutes after.
Being almost molested.
So it sounded like prior to the almost molestation,
you and your uncle were pretty cool.
He was the only one that didn't talk shit about you.
He was the same uncle that pulled the gun on me
later on in life.
Got it, OK.
So it's a W.
Just a W.
Mike?
Just a W minus?
Well, here's what I'm going to say.
Don't point it at its face.
Here's what I'm going to say.
Shoot your fucking balls off.
Yeah, at least that it's not lethal.
I picked this movie based on its description, nothing else.
Through a dartboard bat at the screen, basically.
We know.
And I wish I could rate it higher.
But it's a B plus.
No, I'm kidding.
Absolutely kidding.
I would allow the gun.
I'm absolutely kidding.
There's a hatchet somewhere here.
I got a real gun.
But I will say, only for the discussion that it creates.
It's not worth it.
It's an F minus.
That's a real rating.
OK, but here's the thing.
Just put down W for Mike.
It still becomes a W. It doesn't matter.
It's still going to be a W.
I'm putting quotes around it.
I'm putting quotes around his F minus.
This is terrifying with trains.
Isaac.
I got to give this one honestly a B,
because it got me away from my fucking kids.
Austin.
I'm just kidding.
That is definitely a W.
W from Isaac, good man.
And then we got Brennan.
How many kids do you have, Brennan?
I got three.
You got three.
So five children were neglected for this movie.
Well, I wait till my kids.
I thought you were about to say you want to make it two.
Because you were holding up the camera.
It's actually seven.
It's like, yeah.
I wait till my kids go to bed usually to watch these.
That's why I fall asleep during half of them.
And unfortunately, this was not one
that I fell asleep during.
It's a great train shot by you.
But yeah, this would have been a unanimous from all of us
if Mike didn't fuck it up.
But it's a W.
A W. Yeah, Mike.
You fuck.
It doesn't change the rating.
No, it doesn't change the rating.
I'm putting a W minus.
Yeah.
Fuck this movie.
W minus for singularity.
Now.
So you honestly will say W minus makes it worse
than if you don't stop.
I've got a W.
Not a W minus is what I'm saying.
This is the worst movie we ever watched according to you.
You know what, Mike?
Yes.
It's fine.
I'm just asking.
I don't care.
I will say this.
Me and 44% of them.
At least if you don't stop, dot, dot, dot,
or you'll go blind was funny.
It had some funny moments.
Hey, whatever.
It had some intentional.
No, no, no.
It intended to be funny.
If you really feel that, that's cool.
We'll see.
We'll see if something.
Maybe something else gets a minus, minus in the future.
I feel like because of this movie,
if I ever see John Cusack in real life,
I'm going to sucker punch him.
Oh, shit.
That's a real threat they could put out in the world there.
Isaac Gonzalez threatening to punch.
You want to give your information out
so they can come look for you later?
Well, apparently you just say that John Cusack said something
about Dario's wife and then just let the problem solve itself.
Well, I'm going to save the day because the movie
I picked that I have is a good one.
It's solid.
If you haven't seen it, you're welcome.
And if you have seen it, you're welcome.
OK, say that into the mic.
If you're going to fucking say it.
It's not like the philosopher, right?
First off, it's called After the Dark.
This movie at least is not child porn, Andy.
It's not a bunch of high school kids falling
in love with their teacher.
First off, that wasn't child porn.
There's no nudity.
Although it meant to me, oh my god, I swear to god,
this is that same fucking train.
Did he put it in the caboose video?
No.
No, we haven't gotten to Texas yet.
Yeah, so the movie I picked, everybody,
is 2006 Bruce Willis, Josh Hartnett, Lucy Liu, Morgan
Freeman, Ben Kingsley.
It's called Lucky Number Slevin.
It is a really good con, like people running cons sort of
movie.
Not even shoot them up.
Well, I don't want to give away too much.
Just know that if you haven't seen it, Austin,
have you seen it before?
No, I've seen it like here's the name multiple times.
Here's the one sentence thing.
A mysterious man is roped into a dangerous feud
between two rival crime kingpins,
neither of whom could step foot outside
for fear of assassination.
It is awesome.
It's a banger.
So Lucky Number Slevin is next week.
Now it's time for the Beep Boops recommendation.
Beep Boop.
Recreational recommendation.
All right.
Mike, what do you got?
I am reading right now.
Just kind of started.
I'm only in like chapter two.
So far, it's got a hold of me.
I would recommend it even only be in two chapters.
Quantum Lens, Douglas Rickards.
It's a book?
Quantum Lens.
And I don't know how familiar you are with Douglas Rickards,
but sci-fi slash set kind of now kind of if you can't really tell.
But where there's planetary travel and all that.
Douglas Rickards is an interesting book.
OK.
Dope.
I like books.
I'm going to check that out.
I'm looking for something right now in the sci-fi realm.
Brendan?
Yeah, right now, I guess what I'm reading or listening to
is actually the Game of Thrones, the first Game of Thrones book.
If you're a fan of the show, I definitely recommend the book.
It's interesting.
It's kind of cool to see the differences that they went with
and just kind of learn more about the characters and the backstory.
Is you guys' first episode going to be out by the time this comes out?
Maybe.
If not, very soon, because I can't wait to hear.
Because it's been a long time since I watched Game of Thrones.
I'm kind of going to go through and watch it
as you guys are as these episodes are coming out.
If you want more content from us, you can check out pretty much
every day of the week, except for the weekends right now.
Monday through Friday, you can check out a new show.
We have rewatches.
Sorry.
We have rehashes with multiple.
There's three of those.
Smallville, Game of Thrones, Six Feet Under.
And then there's also our regular shows.
And then check out coming this October, we're
going to have our 17 nights of How the We Eat.
So keep an eye out for that.
It's going to be a lot of fun specials coming out your way.
Austin?
Rec Rec.
Yeah, so I recommend putting your balls,
after watching this movie, you put them into a vice grip.
And then you attach that vice grip turner somehow to a power drill.
My rec.
Again, I've written letters to Santa for just that.
Yeah, what is the bad part, Star Wars?
I want my flashlight with feelings and a ball
vice that just is rapid fire.
So I don't have to wait.
It's the weight that kills me.
I'm recommending, I just read Marcus Luttrell's book.
It's pretty popular.
Probably some of us have read it, at least one other person
besides me.
It's called Lone Survivor by Marcus Luttrell.
And it's like, it's a true story.
He's a Navy SEAL.
He goes out to spy on these Taliban guys
with his three squad mates.
They get overrun by about 200 members of the Taliban.
They kill like 70 of them.
But he loses all his guys.
He runs off.
He gets found by just some local villagers.
And in their religion, there's a thing called lokay, where
if you find a warrior that's wounded,
you have to help him and protect him from his enemies,
even if it means the entire village dies.
That's a great crossword.
We said loki, right?
Yeah, loki.
Lo-kay.
Something lokay.
But yeah, they protect him.
And he comes out and writes a book about it.
Really brutal.
Like, I just finished All Quiet on the Western Front.
And then I read this one.
And it's just crazy how both of them are so brutal.
And it's like such a good story.
And they're literally written 100 years apart.
Isaac, did you have any books you wanted to recommend?
Or anything at all.
Books, music, books, videos.
I mean, we're just doing books.
I don't read.
I am currently in my rotation reading Good Night Moon
with my kids.
That's it.
That's pretty much it.
Have you read it before?
Usually once a night.
Yeah, once a night.
Over and over and over.
Do you feel like you've given your child a complex
where if you don't tell the moon good night via this book,
it won't go to sleep?
And so the day doesn't come the next the following day?
Does she have her own mythology with you as sort of her god?
Because she's young enough that you and your wife
are probably the most central people.
I think we're going to skip Good Night Moon tonight.
Watch Singularity with her.
Don't put her to sleep.
That'll do it.
I would skip.
I know we've talked a lot about it tonight.
Honestly, skip if you don't stop.
Dot, dot, dot, you'll go blind, especially with kids.
That was a, there was definitely a scene in that movie
where they tie a woman to a tree and she gets raped by 40 men.
Now, for the sake of comedy.
So anyway.
Anything to plug, Isaac?
Yeah, Good Night Moon.
Barber shop?
Yeah, come see me at New Era Barber Shop.
Monday through Friday.
What's it called?
New Era Barber Shop on Hancock Road in Blood City.
Nice.
I need to start doing that.
My recommendation, since we were doing books
and we also were talking about Buffy.
Or did we talk about that earlier in a different thing?
We're always talking about Buffy at some point.
I think we need a supercut every time
your recreational recommendation has to do with Buffy.
Yeah, I'm just bugging.
They always will.
It's always Buffy.
There's a book by Christopher Golden, who
does a lot of the Buffy books.
And it's unique.
They're independent stories.
One of them, you see more of Doyle's backstory
if you're an Angel fan, but that doesn't matter.
This one is about an alternate dimension.
It's called The Lost Slayer.
And if you buy the book that I have,
like the physical edition, it's all of them
combined into one issue.
So it's like four books.
It's a lengthy fucking thick ass book.
It's great.
Look at all his Patreon subscribers
for this fucking train shit.
Lanes trains.
One Shadowsteel18.
Dude, I got to start making train videos.
Holy shit.
This train has 335,000.
He has 1 million subscribers.
Just going around filming trains.
And one.
He subscribed to GoTran.
Coasterfan2105, hell yeah, brother.
Let's watch this Go Transit F59PH locomotives.
Come on.
Yeah, Mike.
All right, Mike.
You got to give us really 10 seconds of you.
Oh, that's pretty.
Look at that train just doing its thing, slowly moving
on a little solid line.
I like trains.
Yeah.
Look, every time you think that there's the end of the train,
there's more train around.
This curve, actually, this guy's doing a great job,
because this is exciting.
Look, if this went on forever, I wouldn't know.
Anyway, this is going to be the end of our podcast.
So that's our recommendation.
This podcast brought to you by Mike Armstrong.
Yeah, brought to you by Mike Armstrong, Coasterfan2105.
Coasterfan2105, like and subscribe.
Hit that bell.
He will show you the same trains over and over again.
You really love that Pacific Coast shutting down.
This is better.
Oh, let's watch Singularity instead.
All right, everybody.
So this has been the show.
This guy's going to commit suicide now.
Somehow the comments of our people
are going to get into his comments.
Everyone keeps mentioning Singularity.
He's going to watch it and kill himself.
I'm going to jump in front of an FP29 locomotive.
He's going to jump in front of a train.
He's going to have a gun load.
He's going to get to right before the part where
Andrew says he likes trains, the one relatable part to him.
He can't even make it that far.
And he's going to blow his brains out.
And then it's just, I like trains,
as his dying vision is going to see it.
Please don't do that, Mike Armstrong of train loving fame.
That's our show, everybody.
This has been fun, I guess.
And with me, as always, I was about
to start calling you all bitches again
like we were doing the nightmare on Elm Street one.
I'm with you.
Austin bitch, Farrell.
Austin rode three hours on a fucking train
to be here today, Farrell.
Choo-choo.
Mike heard a story about how Austin almost got a train
rain on him by his uncle, Larson.
I did not need that story.
Well, now I did not need this movie.
Isaac heard a story about how one of Austin's high school
chicks got a train rain on her by the entire football
team, Gonzalez.
I like that story.
Oh, wait.
It's Brendan.
Da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da.
Oh, is it?
Crazy train.
You're on a crazy train, on a crazy train.
Shipley up to Boston.
Going off the rails on the crazy train.
It's Brendan.
Going off the rails on a crazy train.
This movie made Austin confess a lot.
Yeah, but I was going to add to that.
And also has fantasized about being part of a train
with Austin Shipley.
What?
Austin?
Now.
Is that your uncle?
No, no.
Still continuing on with yours.
Is that your uncle?
Yes, it is.
Do you have anything to tell us?
And I'm Andy Austin's uncle, Rice.
This has been Fried Rice Podcast.
We've been fried.
We've been Rice.
We've been Podcast.
Everybody have a good night.
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