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Okay, this is the second official podcast of the second episode of the Say Last podcast

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with your host Caroline Jones.

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And yes, I am just going to be rambling a little bit more, but I want to take this time

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to listen like I say. We're going to be talking about anything and everything on this podcast.

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So if you want anything to be spoken about specifically, you can definitely let me know.

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But this is this official podcast of the second episode is just why I don't believe in the

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one. You know, I don't think that there's one specific person for everybody who's ever

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lived, who's ever going to live. And maybe at one point when people were talking about

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their soulmate or this, there was one point in my life where I probably did kind of fall

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under that line. And I was thinking that would be so nice to kind of have that to have that

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experience. But I don't believe that anymore that there's a specific one designated for

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each individual person. Because you might spend your whole life wondering why you haven't

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found that individual. Or even am I supposed to be with this individual? Am I not? It can

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get you questioning a lot of different things. Also, like that is just like an okay kind

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of way of looking at things, as well as just the premise that oh, well, I've been told,

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oh, you have like an apartment now, like when are you going to find a guy? Like it's like,

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what prompted that conversation? Well, because I have a kitchen because honestly, those different

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ideologies or you get the classic one is do you have your eye on anybody? Have you found

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anybody down that way? Like it's like, no, but again, just, you know, in the nicest way

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possible, keep your mouth shut on those types of things. Because honestly, you for one,

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you don't know what's going through. Second of all, like I say, that is just a very difficult

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thing. Especially when you are the female and you have like these people who are like

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putting some sexist comments and those are some of the more tamer ones that people can

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say. But the reason so first of all, do not believe in the one because you can get yourself

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in this tailspin of wondering if you ever met that person, what are you, what are you

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going to do? Like, did I completely miss the ball? And sometimes, and there are divorces

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for a lot of different reasons. Okay. And sometimes with start of marriages, we wonder,

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why do they seem so great together? But they are constantly obsessing over the one maybe

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that got left behind because, you know, that is definitely the one that got away. And we

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can replay that over and over in our heads till we think we made the wrong decision by

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walking away. You know, if a situation ship doesn't go anywhere, it doesn't go anywhere.

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And that is probably a sign that you're not meant to be together. I used to beat myself

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up about that. Like, okay, we're in this thing. I don't know even what they call it. But these

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situationships, they are almost as draining as a relationship because you put forth so

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much effort, you try to be that person for them. And if you know, and sometimes you know

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that they think the same way about you and it's like, dude, why? Why haven't you moved

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on? Why haven't you like picked up phone? Like all these different things. When things

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don't happen, we often sit in that place of remorse, regret. And it becomes this cycle,

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this continual cycle of just beating ourselves down. So my advice and what I've kind of

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learned is if a situation ship doesn't go anywhere, or even if nothing ever happens,

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it was not meant to be. Like at all. And I know that sounds like difficult to hear.

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I know it's like I completely fumbled on that relationship. And it's one of those situations

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you don't know who's more deploying. Is it the individual that didn't do anything? Because

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the other one in the relationship didn't seem to even make ends meet. So first of all, like

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in this podcast, I'm going to just tell you about like the reasons why people feel like

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they don't need that one or they feel stuck. But then like another reason that people may

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feel stuck in that is they have seen their family members like struggle with different

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categories. And honestly, I'm not saying that your parents are the one to blame because

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you have a very horrible and toxic relationship with your boyfriend. Because your parents

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might have been the best things since Spice Bread. They might have been. But while we

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can learn good, healthy relationships from our family and from our parents, we can also

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learn harmful and horrible different ways to kind of be in a relationship. The way that

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I view that is and I view this with anything in my relationship in life, not just relationships.

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I was talking about relationships so much that anyway, that's a whole different story.

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Is imagine like a rose that rose is beautiful. Yes. And you can admire that rose. It has

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definitely the ones and different characteristics that make it not pretty and can maybe stab

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you in the back. But that rose is still beautiful. Now, honestly, if a person has more thorns

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than even like beauty or more red flags and even green flags, you better not go. Or boy,

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you just better run from that whole situation because it's not really worth it just kind

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of holding yourself back. And you end up being the one who it and and cut and you end up

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in a this is us type of relationship where you're like, I fell down the stairs. We both

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know you didn't fall down the stairs. I can tell that. So don't don't lie to me with that.

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But anyway, that's like another maybe that should be like a whole like the toxic relationships

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should be a whole nother episode in enough itself just because that is like a deep dark

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wound. But basically, all I'm going to say is I with that is I hear people all the time

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just saying, oh, he's a little bit of rough around the edges or she's a little bit rough

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around the edges. You know what glass is rough around the edges. But I don't know about you,

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but I've had glass like in my foot in my hand, everywhere but where it's meant to be. And

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you're basically playing with fire and expecting not to get burned. Like, how is that even

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possible? Anybody I digress from that. So basically, we see these different like relationships

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in our families. Because our families, this is an original thought if someone has thought

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of it before me, I guess it's not that original. But it's something I've continually thought

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about, like, even when I was a kid, our families prepares for life, whether for good or not

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so good. The family unit kind of shows you, okay, this is how a relationship is supposed

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to look. This is how a individual is supposed to respect their spouse and their partner

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for life. And a lot of times, if you're looking towards finding that one, you may even hear

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things about like someone in the relationship is no longer satisfied. Maybe because they

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were looking for the one, maybe because certain things happen and they realized or they thought

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that they realized that that person wasn't worth fighting for. And in any relationship,

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whether that's friendship, or that is a romantic relationship, or even family, you have to

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like work with it. It's not going to be easy. If anything, it is sometimes going to drive

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you up a wall. But it is definitely worth it and worth the risk of having that other

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person angry at you. I would rather you have me, you be angry at me. And we know at least

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we can work something out. If you're angry with me, or upset with me, I know that there

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is a least we have at least a funny chance because you expressed an emotion, you expect

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it showed a difficult emotion sets kind of like bubbling up at the surface or has been

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bubbling for a while. And you were vulnerable enough to share that with me. You may be saying

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at the top of your lungs, I hate you, I hate you, I hate you. But at least at the end of

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the day, we know we'll reverse stand. We know. Now do I think that there needs to be that

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time where it's just like, okay, we need to reflect, we need to be able to express how

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we're doing in a healthy manner? Yes, absolutely. But sometimes we don't have those tools and

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we don't know that we don't have those tools and chill kind of that rubber meets the road.

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And we're like, oh man, I don't have like my tool belt. I don't have all of these things

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that I should have for like a healthy, well built relationship. And so the point to maybe

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like finding that person, I relate more to like finding a person, being able to do life

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with them and celebrate like the small business you celebrate mine, I'll celebrate yours.

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We can talk about what's really going on for without fear of judgment. This is how I see

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like a healthy relationship. You know what? You may have some red flags, but it's not

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going to be detrimental to our relationship because we can work these out or we can even

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seek professional guidance on the topic. And I know I thought that for some people it's

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like hit and miss. I truly believe in seeking professional like LISP LPC type of material.

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Now if you feel more in an LCSW or so an LPC is licensed professional counselor, LCSW is

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licensed clinical social worker. If you feel more comfortable in that atmosphere, by all

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means, I'm a woman LPC person myself, just because my background is in psychology and

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never really wanted to go into social work. That being said, have worked with some social

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workers in my career, even have some family members who are on the social work spectrum.

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We have different opinions that doesn't, but at the end of the day, we can agree to disagree

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with that. Anyway, so like seeking professional guidance is definitely definitely one at the

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top like pinnacles of success in your relationship. Understanding because on both sides, there

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may be some generational like trauma that has or mainly maybe it might just be on one side

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of the relationship. But there might be some generational signs that you didn't realize

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were incorrect or unhealthy coping mechanisms of dealing with the problem. Or maybe you

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did and that's why you're like, I'm never going to treat my spouse the way that my

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parent treated so and so. Like maybe you do recognize that. Great. Then we can like move

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on. We can place an all on the table without like a screaming match or like a power struggle.

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You know, tell people this is what you're going with going through. If you know, while

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I don't believe in the one, I do believe that if I feel safe with you, that's kind of my

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big venture. If I feel safe with you, then maybe we can make this into a relationship.

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If I don't and I am constantly like fidgeting with something, I'm a fidgeter by heart. I

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get that. I sometimes get really bad anxiety with different things. But I understand that

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about myself. And sometimes I have to get myself a couple of times before I feel comfortable

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with you. And if you are anything like me, the first time that we hang out, even if it's

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just in a friendship, I don't want there to be any pressure. I will not hang out with

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you in a dark theater. Just saying. Just because you know, part of me being safe is not feeling

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like I am isolated. And even though you have like hundreds of people in a theater, it's

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just not like a good combo. Also, you're not talking with a person for the most part, unless

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you are me and you talked about the whole movie. But we can go like getting coffee. That does

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not feel, I love getting coffee. So getting coffee with someone is not going to feel like

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an obligation to me that this is a date. The moment that my brain like thinks date and

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just kind of hears that, I'm just like, I kind of shut down and any messages, anything, it's

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just going to be all left on the bed. So just saying I'm that type of person where it's

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like I will not text you, I will not call you back if I feel like it's too far gone.

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And there's no, we're talking back from that. And then like the thing is, if you are truly

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seen by this individual and I don't mean they just like see you analogy in the hallway and

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I mean, like truly they know your weaknesses, they know when you're having a bad day without

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you having to like explain like a million different things to them. And honestly, I know some

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people just don't really want people to notice that. And I will say it is definitely scary

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like having someone know you back and forth and just everywhere around. I've had some

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friends where I've tried to tell them I'm okay. And they're like, I don't believe you.

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And then, you know, it ends up being a crisis. And then I spill my whole guts. But there

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was freedom in that freedom and not having to have your guards up and have your walls

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continually up each and every time that you meet with this person. And that goes back

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to the feeling safe part. First of all, if you feel safe enough to meet with the person,

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but you're going to feel safe enough to share those parts of you that might be annoying,

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might be a little bit extra or just in general, you feel overwhelmed and you don't know if

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you can be yourself. The one who takes you away from whatever is like bothering you and

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allows you to take that step back and breathe. And you are there for them too. I think I

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was like listening to another podcast or it might have been like a video segment type

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of thing. But basically, the individual was saying, everybody always says that a relationship

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or a marriage, whatever, should be like 50-50. And she's like, that's not necessarily true.

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Sometimes you don't come to the table. Now I am paraphrasing a little bit about what

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she said. So, and my husband came out there, but I'm paraphrasing a little bit about what

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she said. Basically, sometimes you come to the table and you only have 10% that day.

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And I'm just doing easy math too. Math is not my strong suit. And so she was so there

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for your partner or your partner in crime, whatever, they can be like, I got you that

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90%. And sometimes you both like I'm so drained, I only have 10% both ways. So that only makes

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up for like 20, 20%. I can't, I can't cover you like that whole way. So how are we going

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to connect with each other? How are we going to relate in a way that isn't a swim match?

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That isn't me projecting onto you like, Oh, I've had a horrible day at work. You think

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you know what that's like? Like, first of all, that accomplishes nothing. It's just one person

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feeling horrible and heartbroken that maybe they were screamed at and maybe they just

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like, well, I'm done with you. I'm done with this relationship. Because it all a relationship

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is basically about building that trust and choosing day after day. They're like, you

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know what? We are going to have a hard times and a hard in battles. We might even battle

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with each other. But at the end of the day, I'm not leaving. We're completely different

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people. But we can definitely learn how to like maybe split the task. You're I'm just

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going to go like a little bit. Just because she is your wife does not mean that she's

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the one that has to be like cooking in the kitchen every single day. This honestly going

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to be some days I don't feel like making dinner, having everything beautiful and lovely and

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just yeah, there's going to be some days where I don't I'm not going to be feeling

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my best to even have everything done. And you know what? Maybe on those days, the other

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person in the relationship chooses to be the best person and be like, okay, you don't

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have that. That's okay. I will spot you. Kind of when you're in the gym, and you're lifting

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this big weight off your shoulder. In order to not be hurt and harmed by that weight that's

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just maybe feels like it's crushing down on you. You have someone what is called spot

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you make sure that you are doing the movements right that you're not going to harm yourself

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in the battle. That's kind of what it has to be like. You are going to spot the other

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person, make sure that they don't harm themselves and be safe to be safe with their mental health

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because I mean, anything is going to take time to kind of like overcome that battle.

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And what I've seen some individuals do is they just keep sweeping it under the rug, sweeping

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their issues continually under the rug, not letting the other person know what's really

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going on, not knowing how they feel about a certain issue. Like truly feel not an anger

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but just laying it out on the table. It ends up in a lot of slam doors and broken conversations,

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broken relationships. But because the issues never resolved, ever something comes up that

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pressure cooker just kind of bubbles up over the surface. And you see that frustration,

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that anger, that resentment towards this other individual time and time again. And I'm not

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saying that's the only reason that people leave a relationship. But when you're here,

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people say I'm not happy. Or, well, even if you have kids, it's like, well, we still love

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you but mommy and dad don't love each other anymore. Well, why is that the case? Because

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you forgot how to make the relationship. First of all, a friendship, the be in connection

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with that person. I've had people I have literally literally screamed in their face. Or even

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told them, no, you're wrong. You shouldn't be going down this path. You shouldn't block

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whatever the case may be. Some people have been like, you know what? Because you call

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me out on this, I don't want to be friends with you anymore. Or sometimes I'm like, you

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know what? This is the way that this makes me feel. When you do X, Y and Z, you find out

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how who the true people are who are willing to stay in your life are at this particular

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moment. And because of the fear of someone evacuating out of my life and not giving any

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explanation, you know what? I am literally scared to death ever being in a relationship.

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Because you know what? I think I'm going to be all like my, I'm going to have a starter

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marriage. I have even thought, okay, I'm going to have a starting marriage. No one is going

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to want me because I am too much. I'm too extra. I'm annoying. I have my own issues.

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They don't want to deal with that. And it's not fear to completely rely on them. Completely

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about everything that's going on, going haywire in your life. It's not fear to them. I'm going

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to be a burden. And while, yes, you don't want to cause them pain, you don't want to

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be a burden. The people who stay stay because they want to stay. Not because they have to.

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And it is taking me a long time to realize that. Because it's often if you're like,

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oh, someone goes to you or something that you think that you did something wrong. And

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if you know beyond a shadow of a doubt that you did something wrong, then for sure, yeah,

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you need to come clean with that. But it seems like maybe a 5% chance that you did something

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wrong. I mean, you're going to end up obsessing about it. Continue. Sometimes. So just remember

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the people who stay in your life are the people who want to stay. Not if they go see you. And

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they don't ever respond to you. Maybe they're not meant to be there. And I realize sometimes

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you do need a distance yourself. But if it's a relationship and you know you're going to

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be there for the long call, you at least need to try to make it work. You might need to

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say, you know what, I need a breather. I can't deal with this. I can't deal with you right

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now. But we're going to come back, you zoom this conversation and be better than we've

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ever been before. If you can at least place that on the table, I think at least you have

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a funny chance. And yes, I have like found myself crying a little bit while filming this

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podcast a little bit. So I don't think you can hear that in my voice. But while that's

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the end of the second episode for the Say Less podcast, I hope that you join again like

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next Wednesday because I am filming this on Wednesday. But when you actually listen to

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this episode, it's going to be on Saturday, June 10. Yep. How to look on the calendar.

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Well, I hope that you enjoyed this episode. If you do have any comments or questions or

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any specific topic that you know needs to be addressed, just make sure that you let me

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know and I will try to address that in a later episode. Well, have a great rest of your day

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and I'll see you next week.