Hello and welcome back to another episode of Upfront and Undivided with Luke and Dean'na.
Hi babe.
How's it going?
It's good.
How are you?
I'm good.
Hey, we're back.
We're back.
We took June off?
Yeah, June off, yes.
Was it most of June?
Did all of it June?
I think so.
I forget my dates.
My dates are all blended.
But yeah, it was at minimum most of June and the first week of July off.
There we go.
Yeah.
Because it's summer.
Yeah.
Because at first you were like, we need to record for the first of July.
And I'm like, no, I was planning after the fourth of July.
Let things calm down.
That was probably wisdom.
Yeah.
Because happy birthday America.
Yes.
248.
Woo.
Yep.
Oh, even numbers.
Yeah.
Two times four is eight.
What?
Look at me, Mathen.
Cool, babe.
Thanks.
That was, yeah, that was, I just, hey, it's all right.
Yeah.
That's my third grade education coming out.
It's fine.
Because summer, we're summering.
Our sweet little guy is done with baseball.
Our sweet girl is about to do a trip.
Yep.
I finished my certification and now I'm going back and redoing some certification to potentially
substitute teach again this coming school year.
You're still plugging away and working on projects and doing things.
Yes.
And...
Re-evaluating other parts of my life.
What are you re-evaluating?
Well, it's just the, just again, just all the stuff that we've had talks about of, you
know, again, where do I want to put my energy?
Where do I want to, what do I want to make my priority?
Yes.
You know, outside of you, the kids, you know, God, you know, where does, where does God want
me to put my energy?
Right.
You know, so again, it's just, because I think, I think the other day we had a conversation.
I know we're kind of jumping in early, but...
No, it's fine.
Oh, it was just last night with, we were chatting with another couple and we were talking about
how, you know, when your priorities are even a little bit out of order, it all of a sudden,
it really throws disorder into everything.
Oh man.
Yeah.
I mean, it's like, the scripture that ultimately always first and foremost comes into my brain
when it comes to things getting out of kilter is seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness.
And then all of these other things will be added to you.
And so it's like, when we, when we take the time to seek Him first, when we take the time
to get our eyes off of, off of the mess and onto Him, then He says, ultimately here, this
is how we're going to walk through this.
We're going to do X, Y, Z or eight, 20, 32.
And you're like, what, what are we doing?
Like that doesn't even, that's not even, and he's like, no, this is how it's going to go.
Because this will help unravel potentially whatever we got ourselves into, whatever mess
we got ourselves into.
But if we follow His lead, genuinely follow His lead, even sometimes when it doesn't quite
make sense, then that's when we, we get to see some really cool things happen.
Yeah.
You know, and it's like, you, you mentioned like taking our eyes off the mess, you know,
it's kind of like when you are cleaning or when you're packing or unpacking, you know,
it's like focus on, you know, one box at a time, one drawer at a time, you know, one
cabinet at a time, you know, or, you know, again, when cleaning, it's like, just focus
on the pile.
What the, what's, what's gathered in this chair, deal with that first before you deal
with the room.
Yeah.
Hmm.
I'm going to go do laundry.
I've never done that was not my intention.
I know, but like all of a sudden I was like, I got a pile.
I got a good sized pile.
That's all right.
It's okay.
Um, but it is, it's, it's one of those where it's like, we had that amazing time with our
friends last night and then we've got other friends that are smack in the thick of it
too.
Yep.
That are literally doing the boxes, doing the packing, purging the stuff, um, letting
go of things.
Ooh, Hey guys, when God has you on a journey and, um, he's making, he's making room.
Um, that seems to be my thing today is make room.
Are you making room?
Yeah.
Um, when he's telling you to make room for the new thing, um, don't, don't get yourself
so caught up in, uh, the numbers.
Don't get yourself so caught up in the, uh, what's the next step.
Just make room.
Just, um, just pack the box, just throw away the stuff.
Um, let go of, uh, the past, let go of the stuff that, that doesn't, um, serve you any
longer.
Um, there's going to be some things that obviously that we keep along the way, right?
Like we talk, if we're talking about physical stuff, we talk about heirlooms, we talk about,
you know, sentimental, the sentimental things, you know, um, our kiddos have got quite a
bit of sentimental.
I think you have a box.
I have a box.
Yeah.
Um, maybe two.
I might have a little bit more than you.
The reason I have a box for the most part is because you insist that you don't throw
it.
I'm like, what?
I don't need it.
I don't need pictures from high school.
They would get to those.
And I'm like, no, I didn't know.
You gotta know what you look like with hair, babe.
Like that wasn't on your face, but on your head, right?
Things of that nature.
Cause our, our sweet boy is going to be like, did you look like that?
Cause you know, our girl, even though like she's got the better tan and all the things
there's, there's pictures that I look back at and I go, wow.
Yeah, that's Gabri.
Yeah.
There's there.
There we are.
There's, there's our common denominator, but it is, it's, it's making room and allowing
God to just come in and, um, and purge and uproot and, and get rid of things again that
either no longer suit you in this moment that are no longer going to benefit you in the
rest of the journey or at least in the next part of the journey or just things that will
absolutely it'll kill you.
Yeah.
It'll absolutely kill you if you hold onto it.
Yeah.
And it, and it just struck me.
This is, this is a really nice segue into what we were going to talk about.
Cause again, you know, we're, we're thinking, you know, we're talking about making room
and we're thinking about not focusing on the mess.
Yeah.
And this episode, we were going to talk about not having a critical spirit.
Yes.
You know, not focusing on the mess, not focusing on what could be wrong, you know, don't, don't
be that negative Nancy.
Right.
You know, so to speak, no offense to anybody, Nancy.
Yeah, Nancy.
I'm sure you're cool.
Yes.
We actually do have some Nancy's in our, we love you.
You're fine.
So I ended up getting very, very convicted and actually, um, God had been dealing with
me probably for about a month now, I would say.
And um, we heard a sermon on Sunday that was really kind of, um, Friday night and then
Sunday and it, it kind of, uh, exposed some stuff.
And um, one of the things that I'm going to butcher it, I mean, I could go back into the
notes that I wrote from the person that had been speaking, but, um, the reader's digest
that I got out of it was this.
So the gentleman was talking about the book of Esther.
He's talked about Queen Esther.
He's talking about, um, there's some things that are in our life that have come to the
surface and it's not because of our doing.
It's not something that we per se had a hand in.
Um, it's generational, uh, hereditary.
Um, it, it's things where the enemy sees our bloodline and says, you know, like you hear
this, the statement of, well, you know, well, my, my great, great, great had XYZ.
So every generation after there's been somebody in the line that ends up having this to a
certain trait or certain characteristic, a certain, um, personality.
And so, um, a critical spirit is something that actually I've been seeing, uh, along
the way in my lifetime and in the life of those in front of me.
And this isn't me to even throw anybody under the bus.
Okay.
So understand me guys, this isn't something, but I also know that there are certain gifts
that God has given us along the way.
And I do believe this with everything inside me.
There's certain gifts that God has given us along the way that are pure and holy and just
and true, right?
Enough good report.
But the enemy has become so sly and so keen that he'll twist something just enough to
where all of a sudden it becomes toxic.
It becomes something that's very, um, destructive.
And so I had actually wrote a post, um, did a post about this and, um, for those of y'all
that do follow us, um, on any kind of socials, this is going to sound very familiar to you,
but for those of you that do not, I'm going to read it.
So, um, a critical spirit is a negative attitude that can cause people to be judgmental, complain
and see the glass as half empty.
People with a critical spirit may also be ungrateful, selfish and quick to point out
others flaws.
This is what God is dealing with me and wants to uproot.
So I'll, I'll put a pin in that right there because a lot of people that encounter me
are like, you're always very encouraging.
You're always, you speak positive, all of the things which I appreciate.
Um, so I'm going to follow that up with it disguises itself as discernment or revelation
at times.
And though that may be true, that's where the twisting comes in.
Like God shows you something about somebody or he, he, um, highlights a situation that
you might, that he's wanting to put in your site, right?
He wants to, to give you, Hey, look, look, this is, this seems to be, there seems to
be a problem here.
And so instead of us, God doesn't want us to be critical of people or situations.
He wants us to be someone who sees with a heart and the eyes of God, he desires us to
come and pray and war at his throne and not gossip and backbite on the throne.
He longs for people to be safe with us.
And we need to ultimately long that this generational route ends with us.
And so, um, when I was thinking about this critical spirit and I was thinking about different
family members in my life that are above me, and I think God has given them such discernment.
He's given them such insight.
He's given them like, like there seems to be a direct line.
And I, I'm pretty certain.
I'm very certain that I have shared, like one of my brothers in particular had said,
um, God was showing him some things that were going on in a church, right?
And immediately he started getting angry.
He started getting very, um, just vocal about it.
And the Holy Spirit immediately spoke to him and convicted him and said, I didn't show
you that for you to talk about and to be angry.
I showed you that to pray into war and to set people free.
And there's too many times, um, that I'll go to war at the beginning or I I'm putting
this on me, but I'm saying this for all of us that there's those, those gifts that God
has given us that it's like, we see things, we see certain aspects, we see certain things.
It's like, okay, God, are you wanting me to pray about this ultimately?
But is there something that physically that you want me to do?
Is there something that I need to say?
Do I see that there's a lack here?
Do you want me to step into this place or is this something that I need to be maybe
seeking out and saying, father, who do you see fit to fill this void?
Right.
Because it's, I think, I think we get so caught up in the mass, kind of like what we were
talking about, like our eyes get on the mass.
Instead of focusing in on his righteousness, think on things that are just and good and
holy and good report.
Okay.
Even if I see that you're in the middle of a mess, even if I see that there's garbage
going on inside of you, um, that there's stuff maybe that needs to be, that needs to be uprooted,
right?
I need to love God and love you enough to say there's a treasure inside there.
There's something inside there.
Father, help me to, to nourish or help me to support or help me to, to just pray and
just speak blessings or help me just to keep my freaking mouth shut and stop, stop being
so negative because blessings and cursings cannot come out of the same space.
If I, if I'm expecting something good out of a person's life, including my own, like,
because the reality is, is I was seeing it full force coming out of our children's mouths.
I'm hearing critical things.
I'm hearing them being critical of themselves and I'm like, Ooh, okay.
Cause some people will be like, well, I don't talk about anybody.
What about, what do you say about yourself?
You know, what are you saying about God?
Well, you're critical about God.
What are you talking about?
Are, are you freaking out because he's not doing something on your timetable?
Are you being critical about it?
Are you saying where, where are you God?
What do you mean?
Where am I?
I'm right here.
I haven't left here.
I'm right in the midst of it.
I'm going to get your eyes off of the mass and get him back on me.
Yeah.
And, and to also bring it kind of like, uh, I want to say almost local level, you know,
down to, you know, relationships and all that.
It's, you know, is that critical spirit that can really harm how you look at your spouse
or how your spouse looks at you.
You know what I mean?
Again, it's, you know, cause it can be, you know, it can be number one, the, the critical
spirit of you criticizing everything that your spouse does, you know, how they do stuff,
what they do, you know, how they say stuff and all that, or two, it can be, you are so
critical of yourself and, and basically swatting down and batting down anything that your spouse
tries to say to build you up.
Right.
That eventually your spouse will stop.
That's right.
You know, so it's like that critical spirit, you know, again, either going out towards
your spouse or, you know, blocking all the good things coming from your spouse, you know,
it's like, you know, it's, it's those kinds of things that, that can really, that can
really affect a marriage, you know, and it's, I think that that's one of those things,
you know, again, kind of, you know, hopefully you've got it taken care of before you get
married or, or strategies to take care of it, you know, but again, you know, we are
we, we can fix this.
We can, we can, you know, confront and conquer anything that comes up that could harm our
marriage.
Yes.
So it's like, whenever that kind of comes up, it's like, okay, I know, I know what that
is or I see what that is.
And again, rather than saying, I see this in you, just, I see, I see this coming up.
Yes.
And I, and we need to take care of it.
Right.
And it's the same even with our children, right?
Like, in every relationship, just looking at them.
One of my favorite lines with our brown eyed girl, right?
Like, I'll look at her and I'll say, don't talk to my daughter like that.
Because ultimately it's a critical spirit.
It's not necessarily her, you know, but that thing has got her so twisted, not even twisted,
but just he's lying to you.
The enemy's lying to you.
And we're learning more and more when it comes to that critical thing.
Yes, somebody might look at you and say, okay, listen, this is something we need to do.
This is, we need to better our lives.
We need to do this, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.
And then there's those other times where it's like, maybe the person that is being critical.
Because I know with me, I get very, very critical when I'm not sleeping well, when I'm not eating
well, when I'm not exercising, when I haven't been in the word of God.
I'm not feeling good about me.
Right?
And so I start because or if or I'm not doing what it is that God's told me to do.
Yeah.
Right?
Like, oh, well, they should be, well, they should, well, they will well.
And it's like, because it's the deflecting off of, of what God is dealing with you on.
And it's incredibly uncomfortable.
But man, it's so needed.
Like, we need to put that, we need to put that mirror up against ourselves and look
and say, how could I do better?
How can I, how can I change my stink and think?
And I mean, we could read the books, we could say the things we could pray the prayers we
could, but it's, it's ultimately it's, it's just that disciplining our speech, disciplining
our minds, taking thoughts captive, saying, Oh, that's not what the word of God says.
That's not who he calls me to be.
I am more than a conqueror.
I can, I genuinely can do all things through Christ.
That gives me grace where he gives me that grace and where he strengthens me to do it.
You know, that there are certain things that we stand back and we have to say, and then
we have to give ourselves grace and give our give the person in front of us.
If there genuinely is something that's needed to be dealt with, you know, like you're
so gracious to me when it comes to growth and it's when it's I'm standing there going,
I suck, behave like a suck and you're like, you don't suck.
We just need to tweak some things, you know, and being, being that person for each other
and then allowing the Holy Spirit to come in, it just, it, things get better.
Yeah.
And it is, and that is, that is the key is, you know, being there for each other, you
know, being there for our kids, our spouse, you know, and remembering, you know, who they
are to us.
And, you know, like another thing that you said, you know, cause I know you said, you
know, sometimes with Gabri it's, you're like, you know, don't talk to my daughter that way.
Yeah.
Another thing that you used to say, you still say it once in a while, just not as much.
And sometimes something I try to remind you of is like, I want to be louder.
I want my voice to be louder than that voice that's trying to tear you down.
Yeah.
You know?
And so it's like, I, it's like, I know, you know this, but I'm still going to say it again.
I mean, how many times like in prayer, in worship, you know, it's like, we know God
is holy.
We know God is all powerful and stuff like that.
But when we worship him and we declare it, it's like, it's not like, you know, God's
not sitting up in heaven and be like, Oh my gosh, I forgot.
Thank you.
Thank you for reminding me that I am your salvation.
Yes.
You know, so it's like, we know these things, but it is, it's, it's that, it's that reminder.
It's that, you know, the, the voice of those that love you, those that know you to help
overcome that internalized dark spiral voice that's, that's trying to bring us down and
drag you down.
And you know, so again, it's just, it is, it's those, but you know, again, it's, it's
those things that what can we do together?
What can we do for each other?
Yeah.
You know, it's not like, you know, again, you're not sitting there saying, well, you
need to fix that.
Yeah.
You know, fix your face.
I mean, you say that to me a lot, but that is, that is not, yeah, that's just intensity.
Soften your face, babe.
Right.
You know, but, but it is, it's, you know, when it comes to these critical spirits and
the, the, the tearing down self-talk and stuff like that, or the, you know, tearing things
down because it's not to your quote unquote standards, you know, it's the, you know, how
can we fix this?
You know, how can we, how can we combat this?
You know, what can, you know, if our kids are being really critical and all that, it's
like, are they learning that from us?
Right.
You know, and if they're learning it from us, then we need to fix that.
If they're learning it from somewhere else, we need to fix that.
We need to war against it.
Right.
Yeah.
We need to war against it.
And you know, whether, you know, if it's a friend, we, we limit time with that friend
or, or we do spiritual baths when they come back from hanging out with that friend.
Yes.
And it's, you know, or it's different things, you know, if it's a TV show, it's like, okay,
we're not watching that TV show anymore.
You know, so it is, it's, it's that, you know, what is a critical spirit?
And how can we combat it?
Yeah.
You know, how can we get rid of it?
How can we, you know, squash it and, and kind of see the warning signs so that way when
it does try to come back and it does try to, you know, interfere and interject itself into
our marriage, into our families that, you know, it's like, oh no, we know what that
is.
We can, we can take care of that and sweep it out.
Right.
But then when we, in the scripture, it talks about when you, when you make one go and you
sweep the whole house clean that you need to fill it back up with something greater,
right?
Or something more will come back with seven of its friends.
And so this is where the spiritual warfare comes into play that you have, that we, that
we have to do, we get to do, we have the privilege to do the authority to do.
We get to be the people that walks into our home.
Okay.
So, so your, your, your spouse and one of your kiddos, they might be at odds with each
other, right?
Some things going on.
Okay.
You as the authority, you as the head, you as, you know, the, the spiritual covering
in that space, you get to walk into that space and you get to, to speak the word of God.
You get to command that thing to go in the name of Jesus.
Anoint things.
I mean, you see it on a lie where I'll walk, I'll clean the house, but then I'll go clean
the house and then start anointing, like anoint the doors.
When you're folding clothes, pray, pray over the clothes.
I actually learned that one from another friend of mine.
He's like, wear clothes, you know, doing laundry can be a chore.
There's times where it's like, you go, dang, you know, well, whatever piece of clothes,
clothing that is, whoever's body belongs in that, then you get to speak.
My child is clothed in righteousness.
My spouse has the, that is girded with peace.
They have, you know, socks, wherever you go, you're going to be in peace, you know, things
like that.
And then I'm the sticky note girl, right?
Where I'll do the sharp or not, not the sharpies.
What am I trying to say?
The dry erase markers and I'll write on our children's mirrors, you know, who they are,
whose they are, reminding them that they are set apart for such a time as this.
And it's like, we're so good at doing this for other people.
And so many times we forget us.
We forget I am the righteousness of God.
I am, I am a child of the King.
You know, we forget our position and who we are.
And then we have to, we get to say, now, father, I thank you that critical spirits gone.
And I thank you that the fruit of your spirit, the joy, the peace, the joy of the self of
my salvation father, renew a right spirit within me.
Let my mind be sound.
You know, let me, let me be somebody that walks according to your statutes and, and
who you are because I love you, not because I'm just commanded to, but because I genuinely
love you.
And I want to, I want to do right by you.
And I want those around me to be safe too.
Yeah.
And I, and I think sometimes, you know, it's also, we, I think almost we forget to say
that even to our spouse and kids, you know, it's, it's almost you fall into that trap
of, well, they know I love them.
Yes.
They, they know, they know they're special.
They know they're, they're encouraged.
They know they're strong and mighty.
You know, they, they know who they are.
They know whose they are, you know, you know, when, when you talk about, you know, when
you would, you know, when you would take Sebastian to school, you know, and it's like, you know,
who are you, you know, God's boy, what are you strong, mighty, kind and brave.
And I can do anything I put my mind to.
And there are some times where he says it kind of quiet and the speed talks through
it.
And it's like, okay, you're just saying it to say it, you know, but it's like, but again,
it's like, we know it's there.
Yeah.
You know, so we could, we could stop saying it because we know it's there.
We know it's in it.
We know it's in him.
We know it's there.
We know he knows.
So we'll just stop saying it.
And it's like, you know, but if we stop saying it, then it's like, is, is that, you know,
again, it's, it's back to that external.
It's back to that.
I heard it once, you know, it's like you pray for your spouse, but do you pray for your
spouse where your spouse can hear it, where you're actually praying over them?
You know, it's like, I know sometimes it's hard, especially when I go into the office
and you're still trying to sleep while I'm leaving.
And it's like, I'll still wake you up.
And it's like, I'm still going to pray, pray over the day while you're, while you're half
asleep.
Right.
But it's, you know, cause it is, it's, it's, there's, you know, like you said, you know,
there that, that life and death, you know, blessings and cursing has come from the tongue,
you know, the overflow of the heart, the mouth speaks.
So it's, it's that, it's that speaking out loud of the blessings, it's speaking out loud
of the encouragement, it's speaking out loud of the, I know you can do it.
You know, the, just the, the goodness, you know, the positivity, you know, that, that
you speak over your family members, over your spouse, over your friends, you know, it's
just, that's, that's what does it, you know, that's what just kind of helps.
And again, if you speak, it's almost like if you get used to speaking that goodness,
all of a sudden when you speak critical, it's going to feel weird.
Yeah.
Yes.
You know, all of a sudden it'll come out and be like, that's not me or why did I say that?
You know, it's, it's, it's not going to feel right.
Yeah.
And then, and then you would want to follow up with, ew, I am so sorry.
That was gross.
Let me try that again.
I was trying to correct, not be critical.
Right.
Yeah.
And there's a difference.
There's an absolute difference because it is critical is, is the tearing down.
Critical is, is like you said, the negative Nancy and just being just, yeah, gross.
Like nobody wants to be around that, you know?
And, and you know, and then like you said, if, if we ourselves are not being critical
to our children, but we see certain friends or different ones and we hear how they talk
or we see how our children respond after they've been around them and we're like, Hmm.
No.
Hmm.
Okay.
Um, maybe reevaluate this.
I don't want you to be used to somebody speaking to you like this.
I don't want this to, well, it's just normal.
We have a lot of people.
Well, that's just the way I was raised.
This is just who I am.
And you want to go, uh, no, no, um, things change.
You now know better.
You, you hopefully have discernment enough to where you see that, that, that, that's
pukey and um, like I'm, I'm praying that you taste your words before they come out
of your mouth and in check your heart because you and I are so good about saying, okay,
babe, I'm going to try to talk to you about something right now.
And there's a very good chance that this is not going to come out right, but I need you
to hear my heart while I'm stumbling over my words.
Right.
And I was about to say that too.
Yeah.
I'm glad you brought that up.
And so it's, it's that space of if your heart is right, if, if, if like, if you're angry
at this person, if there's something going on, okay, deal with that, like deal with that.
Um, deal with, deal with the unforgiveness or deal with the hurt, deal with a disappointment,
deal with whatever it is that needs to be dealt with.
Okay.
Um, deal with that, deal with the root of it being critical.
Now you're just being nasty.
Now you're just, you're basically, you're, you're fighting dirty and as opposed to fighting
for a resolution, you're, you're fighting to be right or you're fighting to bury somebody
and that that's not love.
There's nothing good about that.
It's not.
And it's, it is, it's, it's the, you know, again, step back and say, is, is, it's like,
I hate to say it like this, but it's like, is this the Christian way to do things?
You know, is this the Christian way to have this conversation or to bring up this, um,
you know, thing that I see that might be an issue or, you know, Hey, I, I see that you're
falling short.
You know, it's, if I see that, if I see a lack or if I see room for improvement, it's
like how, how best to tell somebody, you know, is it, you know, again, cause, cause nobody,
you know, nobody wants to be torn apart to tell them where they're lacking or where they
could improve, you know?
So it's, you know, how do you, how do you explain to somebody, you know, Hey, this bothers
me or Hey, this is an area where you could be better or we could be better.
You know, it's, it's the, you know, again, how do you bring those things up and you know,
pray about it, you know, yes.
Pray and, and you know, it's, it's almost that constant prayer of, you know, God, you
know, watch over my mouth, you know, guard my words, you know, because you're, when you're
in the middle of a conversation, you're not going to sit there and say, okay, we need
to pause the conversation so I can pray about what I'm going to say in the rest of this
conversation.
Right.
Because then somebody is going to look at you and be like, well, what are you going
to say about me that you need to pray about it first?
You know, mid, mid conversation.
But man, if you need to, right, right.
I mean, honestly, all of a sudden I'm like, I would not be mad at you if all of a sudden
you're like, you know what, babe, I need to be in short, Doria say, I need me and Jesus
need to work something.
Hold, I'll be right back.
Yeah.
And yeah, there are times where that needs to happen.
Yeah.
Like I'm going to walk away now.
Yeah.
But for the most part it is when you're having a normal conversation, it's, it's not like,
you know, you're going to, you're going to pause for prayer in the middle of a convert
of a normal conversation.
Yeah.
Um, you know, especially if something, you know, if you notice something, it's kind of
like been on your mind, it's been on your heart.
It's like, you know, again, something that, you know, this bothers me or I've noticed
this or whatever, you know, it's like, you know, it's there, you know, it's coming, you
know that, okay, I should probably pray myself up before I have this conversation.
So I'm not overly critical so that I do say what needs to be said so that I can say words
that are, are, you know, not necessarily encouraging, but words that are not going to tear down.
Yes.
You know, so I think that's, that's where it needs to be.
Yeah.
You know, so it's, it is, it's, we just, we do, we just need to focus on the encouragement.
We need to focus on the building up.
And when we notice that there is that critical spirit, that critical talk that, that pops
up, we just need to, to be aware of it, that it's, that we take care of it.
Yeah.
Squash it.
Yeah.
Squash it.
Call it out.
Call it out of yourself.
I mean, like, again, if you, if you notice like, man, I, I, I've literally, I flashed
to my brother, Bobby, and how he is so good.
He will call himself out in front of you.
Like, like, man, that sure sounded bad, didn't it?
I'm sorry.
Like, let me, let me try that one again.
You know, and it's, and, and there's, there's, man, there's power in that.
There's strength in that.
There's, there's a beauty that comes in.
And it also, it gives other people, I do, we want to give other people permission.
Like we want to give them room to where they have that ability to, when, you know, it was
beautiful because it was like, talking to Gabri today and her and I were running, right?
She's getting ready to take off and we're getting some loose ends tied up.
And I said, Hey, I wanted to tell you something.
And I said, there was, I said, I had an opportunity to talk with a friend and she was expressing
to me how like there was a situation that had happened.
And she's like, I will never, I will never tell my children that they don't need to know
this.
Right.
And, and looking at her and saying, can I tell you a story?
And I'm telling all of our listeners and when I told Gabri the story of, of some of this
stuff that I've done and the way that I handled it and was incredibly transparent and truthful,
right?
Our sweet girl simply walks over to me.
I'm, I'm crying and just holds me as I just sob and just break.
Right.
And I'm like, what happens in these moments when we are allowing God to correct us even
in front of people?
Yeah.
Like, because we're, we're seeing where some people, they, they have this perfection mentality
or they have this, this thing that says, I have, I'm a Christian, so I have to look good
constantly or I have to do the right thing all the time.
That's why we need Jesus.
I mean, that's, and, and, and that's not licensed to do what you want to.
It's licensed to say we have grace and we have mercy and we have a, we have a savior
that's going to help us get better each time.
Right.
And so I'm looking at, at the friend and saying, we get to open up an opportunity when God
tells us to obviously, right?
In front of the right people when he, when the Holy Spirit says, but the point is, is
we can't be so guarded in, in even our sins, in our shortcomings and our failings.
We need to say, Holy Spirit, open me up, open me up, deal with me.
Because as you're dealing with me, there might be an onlooker that's watching, that's dealing
with something even greater or is, or is on a path that their destruction is going to
be even more intense than mine.
Right.
But because I'm being open and honest about what God is having to do with me on, it's
going to uproot some stuff that, that ultimately set me free.
And so it's like, when, when we're having conversations with a critical spirit, a lying
tongue, gossip, whatever it is, just like what people consider small sins, but they're
not.
Right.
Sin is sin.
Okay.
And it's like these things, basically the, the, your, what is it?
The annihilation or the assassination of someone's character when you're speaking poorly and
you're speaking lies against them.
It's like, we need to be better about calling each other out and calling our own selves
out.
Yeah, definitely.
We need to be, we need to be people that see the best, that believe the best.
We need to, we need to have the eyes of Christ.
If something's wrong, that we call it out, but we call it out in a heart of love for
that person to come to repentance, for that person to come to salvation, for that person
to be delivered, not for their demise, not to say, Oh, look, you did X, Y, Z. No, it's,
it's being, it's being loving enough as the people of God, as the spouse, as the family
member, whatever it is, whatever position it is that you play in this person's life,
whatever that is, as far as that relationship, even the pastor, like again, we're seeing
all these different pastors right now kind of just falling.
And it's like, what can we say to each other now before that tiny seed becomes so deep
rooted that it grows into this monster and it can completely do something that could
wipe you out?
We, we, we get to be better.
That's good.
I like that.
So I think that that's kind of why this has been specifically kind of heavy on me.
Just, yes, God's been dealing with me, but we see where this one thing could absolutely
destroy.
Yeah.
Oh yeah.
It could destroy the relationships.
It can destroy the fabric trust.
It could destroy all of it.
And so if you find yourself getting critical or you're seeing more of the negative than
the positive, you know, or if the negative is true negative, like, right, like we've
talked about, like if there's some serious abuse or if there's some serious something,
okay, even in that though, step back for a second.
Holy spirit, what do you want to do?
How do you want to fix this?
Is this something that is completely destroyed and annihilated and I walk away or is this
something that I stand and I fight and I pray and I soldier through and we become stronger
on the other side?
Right.
That's good.
I like it.
Is it?
Was that short today?
We're kind of short today.
Not really.
Not really?
Oh, okay.
Not as short as I was aiming for.
I was trying to aim for a little shorter.
Okay.
Well, you got gaming.
Trying to trim things a little bit.
You got gaming to do.
Yeah.
It's good.
Yeah.
It's good.
It's good to be back in the studio.
Yes.
It's good to be back with you guys.
I want to pull the audience and I want to say if you guys got questions, I mean, I know
that we've had questions before that went really, really well, but if there's something
specific that might be leaning on any one of y'all's hearts, just reach out to us.
Let us know.
Yeah.
Right now, we are asking God to really deal with our lives.
We want to be refined in a way to where we are better equipped to pour out whatever it
is that God has us to do for you, for each other, for our family, and for the kingdom.
So know that we love you guys and have the best week.
Enjoy the journey.