Hello and welcome back to another episode of Upfront and Undivided with Luke and Dean'na.
Hi.
Hey babe.
How's it going?
It's good.
How are you?
I'm good.
How many different types of music are in your head about the time that you're doing this
that you always say who we're about to be?
It's, I'll be honest, it's not the music.
It's just the intro.
I do not hear the music.
It's literally the what podcast.
Again, it's like years ago we learned how men's brains and women's brains work differently
and how it's like a woman's brain is all these connected wires and they're connected spots
and it's really great and it's like connection to here to connect to there, connect to there
and men's brains are very compartmentalized and it's like a box for this and a box for
this.
So I feel like I have to, okay, which box am I going into?
I got you.
Okay.
And it's almost like, I think it's almost like there's, it's not so much boxes in my
brain but it's almost like breaking down computer files.
Okay.
So it's like, or computer folders where it's like, okay, I have a podcast folder and I
went into that folder and now I have three subfolders for right now into that.
Well, four subfolders in that podcast, main podcast folder.
So it's like, okay, which folder am I going into?
Where I do like an eighties remix of all three of the things in my, like the different music.
Which is funny because it's like, you don't even partake in mine.
But I listen to it.
That music still runs.
That stuff.
So a good friend, a good friend.
Sent me a really funny reel, you know, cause you're talking about that.
And it was like, you know, how do they, how do they make heavy metal music?
You sent it to me.
Yes.
And it's like, you know, somebody sucking like the last bit of air out of a juice box.
And it's like, that's singing for heavy metal.
So I was like, that is so appropriate.
That is awesome.
And when the guy did it actually sounded like it.
Yeah.
That was crazy.
And the friend of mine that sent that to us, he used to do that.
So he's very aware of, yes, this is, this is heavy metal.
I asked him one day, I was like, how do you even do that?
Right?
Yeah.
And he's like, you, you, what is it?
You suck in, you don't breathe out.
Yes.
And it was like, it's no wonder.
Like, just cause I'm thinking you are shredding those vocal cords.
And it's like, no, just like I'm sucking in.
I'm not breathing out.
And it's like, that's bizarre.
And apparently I've also seen, we're taking a really weird sidetrack rabbit hole.
So from other people that I follow on Instagram, like people that are like heavy metal, like
screamers and stuff like that, there is, there's at least one well-known like scream coach.
Okay.
And she actually teaches people how to scream and how to do these really guttural, without
damaging their vocal cords.
I mean, here's how you can do this and sound good.
Because again, one of the ones that I followed that I found out about this coach is David
Draben, the front man for Disturbed.
For Disturbed.
The fact that he can scream and yell, but then also does that really great rendition
of Sound of Silence.
It's one of my favorites.
That actually is on my playlist when we're on the treadmill and things.
Yeah.
No, that's cool.
That's cool.
And he also said that he doesn't speak a lot afterwards.
Yes.
After he has...
He admits that he basically becomes a monk.
Yeah.
And just gets real quiet and just lets his body rest.
And I would assume that that would have to be part of it.
That you have to be very, very careful about what you partake in in every area.
And self-care.
Yes.
And surrounding yourself with people that support you and are okay with that.
That's true.
Which...
Look at that.
We took a really weird rabbit hole trail.
Right to where we needed to be.
Right to where... really good segue.
I think so.
That was really fun.
We did not plan that at all.
Nope.
Not at all.
Proud of us.
So proud of us.
Look at us.
Look at that Holy Spirit.
Come on.
Talking about heavy metal and everything.
And he just takes us right there.
Yeah.
See?
We have a diverse God.
I like that.
Yes.
What are we talking about?
Today we are talking about physical support.
Okay.
And then next week is week four of our...
Yes.
...question four.
Of questions from the audience.
Questions from the audience.
And then I think...
Next episode will be our final.
I think so.
And then are we taking a hiatus?
We are not planning on taking a hiatus.
Okay.
We're gonna keep going.
That is in the real.
Beautiful.
You guys are taking...
Okay.
I just wanted to double check.
Yeah.
And then next week, what's important that's happening?
Next week is your birthday.
You're turning 49.
Woo hoo!
Listen, and all the girls that just cringed and just says,
oh, he said your age.
Darn, Tootin, he said my age because I look good and I feel good and God is good.
And listen, even with all of my...
Sometimes my hurts and my squishes and my aches and my pains and my things, I am alive.
I am loved.
I am blessed.
And I'm still moving.
I'm not stopping.
I will not stop.
I will not stop because God has entrusted me with a very precious gift and that is the
gift of life.
This is...
Listen, guys, your bodies are the thing that you are accountable for.
You will be accountable for how you treated it.
So do it well.
And fun fact about physical health and age.
You found out today that you are roughly the same age as the Spice Girls.
The Spice Girls.
That was the coolest...
Like you were in that...
Yes.
We had the day off today because we were going to do field day with our kiddo and they changed
it for tomorrow, which we're like, I can't now.
I can't change.
I can't.
I got things to do.
I actually have to work and got to do some stuff.
And your boss needed you.
So shout out to your boss if he listens to us.
If not, shout out to your coworker.
Does he listen to us or does he just listen to you and the boys?
I think he just listens to me.
Oh, okay.
I'm not sure.
No, that's fine.
I'm not mad.
That's fine.
I'm not mad at my coworkers anyways.
Yes.
Shout out to every one of them because you do.
You go, you hang out with them and then you come home and you're in a good mood.
Not that you're not in a good mood, but there's just, there's genuinely something about being
surrounded by people kind of like what you're saying that kind of help support you in a
space.
Yeah.
It does help that the majority of them are veterans.
Yes.
So you guys are all twisted in some sort of fun way.
Yes, we are.
But it is, it's silly stories.
It's good stories.
It's being able to communicate in a level and a place because not everybody understands.
Yes.
And it's good.
Yes.
It is good.
So you got to hang out with me today and then it was, we ran some errands, did some grocery
shopping, picked up something for our daughter.
And about that time I saw a magazine cover and it was, it was Victoria Beckham and Posh
Spice.
Yes.
And I went, I went 50, 50, 50.
What?
Wait a minute.
What?
Spice Girls.
And I'm like staring at you going Spice Girls.
Wait, babe.
Like they came out when we were what?
I don't understand.
We're on some high school.
What's going on?
And so we found out 1994 was when they came out.
Right?
Is that what we said?
Yeah.
So that was a year after I graduated, but a year prior.
When did you graduate?
96?
Yes.
I graduated May of 96.
Yes.
So those paying attention, number one, I am 18 months older than Luke.
And your favorite story is that you got held back a year.
Yes.
Not my favorite story.
Not your favorite story, but it's not your favorite story at all.
But one of the reasons why...
One of the reasons why I graduated in 96 was because I was held back a year.
Yeah.
Because it would, it's like that doesn't math and it's like this is why.
Because you were.
I was 19.
And it's funny because you were 17 when you graduated high school.
I was 19 when I graduated high school.
Yep.
So.
I was the tiny of the kiddos and you were the older of the kiddos.
Yep.
It's fine.
Anyway, so yeah, so I am as old as spice.
Yes.
I'm not mad.
It's fine.
I'm in good company.
I saw pictures of them recently.
I'm like, all right, you all look good.
Good.
All right.
That's what 50 is looking like.
Come on.
Yep.
Bring it.
Okay.
So we have one more question that we have from our audience.
Yes.
How do we support each other in physical health in marriage?
And I know that can take a lot of different forms because I mean, and we'll try to hit
them.
I mean, it's impossible to hit like every aspect of physical health.
Yes.
But we'll try to hit some of the big ones are the ones that we think are kind of some
of the big ones.
Right.
Because again, I think one of our stories about within the first couple months of our
marriage, I got hit pretty hard with a physical health attack.
It was like my wrist was all jacked up.
My ankles were all jacked up.
A lot of crazy stuff was happening like gout, heavy metal and just-
You were bent over literally having to walk with a cane.
Yeah.
So again, and I think we've told that story how it was just that reminder of in sickness
and in health.
Right.
But it's like, what do we do?
If something like that happens, and I think it when stuff like that happens, it's easier
for a spouse to say, well, of course I'm going to support my spouse in this time of them
being hurt or injured or something is going on.
Oh, you just had your gallbladder out.
Oh, you just had surgery to remove a lump from the side of your breast.
Right.
Two surgeries actually.
Two surgeries, yes.
It's easier for us to look at each other and say, well, of course, that's your physical
health.
Yes, I'm going to take care of you.
But it's like, I almost feel, and we didn't talk to really the people that ask these questions
and say, hey, can you fill us in?
What exactly did you mean?
So we're kind of blindly saying, we're assuming we think we know what people mean.
We don't know what people mean, but this is how we interpret it.
Yes.
But I see it as different than that because again, it's so many aspects of, do we talk
about the motivation or not to be physically active, go out for walks, go to the gym.
Which is where we're headed.
We're done with this.
Because we were having a debate earlier about, do we record first or do we gym first?
We record it first.
You are a priority.
But it is.
So how do we prioritize those kind of things or what if you're somebody that, oh, I like
being physically active, my spouse doesn't.
How do you navigate those waters?
Because for a while, it's kind of, I can see where a spouse would be like, well, that's
fine.
That's your walk.
That's your journey.
I'll be over here.
But eventually I could almost see where that could introduce a wedge into the marriage.
I will be as vocal as to say I could see where that would absolutely infuriate and piss somebody
off.
Yeah.
I mean, I'll just go there because I know that when you were hurting, and again, absolutely
no fault of your own.
This just all of a sudden happened.
And it was day three.
It was a day three.
Yeah.
And you being in bed, you literally go to bed and then you'd go to the bathroom and
then you'd come back to the bed again.
You would not go anywhere else in the house.
You wouldn't move.
You just kind of lay there.
And you were in pain.
We understand.
Listen to me, guys.
This is not me being cold hearted at all.
I genuinely believe that this was one of those moments.
And this is something I will say that you need to really ask the Holy Spirit to guide
you in it because I walked over to our bed, climbed pretty much over you and said, it's
time to get up now.
Because I think what was happening was when we start physically hurting or we're not feeling
good, the enemy wants to not just attack you physically, but mentally and emotionally and
spiritually.
It starts to weigh on you.
It gets really heavy.
And I think that that's what was happening.
I was starting to watch the enemy starting to bring a darkness over you and into our
home.
And I said, we're getting up and we are going to the pool.
And if I have to put you on a floaty and float you around on a lazy river, you are going
to get outside.
And you obliged me, which was very precious.
I think that in itself was a good thing because sometimes that's not always the case.
Somebody will fight you.
And you didn't, which I'm grateful that you didn't.
And I think I will say, and you could correct me if I'm wrong, I will say, yes, number one,
we were freshly married, but we also have been very, very careful of how we speak to
each other.
And you heard not just my words, but you heard the intensity in my voice of like, we've got
to go because if you don't get up, you're going to die here.
And it's like having a great understanding of that or trusting your spouse enough to
say, I don't feel good.
And then looking at you saying, I know you don't now, but I promise if we get moving,
it is going to get better.
And we're going to, you know, cause like, again, we're almost 49.
I've got like, sometimes my hip doesn't want to work with me.
Sometimes my back gets weird, just things like that.
Things that I'm praying for, praying, you know, God, Father, thank you for healing me.
Thank you for restoring me.
But I also know that there's those times where you stand back and you say, I've got to move.
Number one, it's going to help me in my health.
But number two, I'm going to hurt anyway.
So I might as well move, enjoy my spouse while I'm moving.
Even if I'm hurting, the fact is that I, I at least am trying to take back what the enemy
has stolen from me in that point.
Yeah.
And that's true.
And, and it is.
And that's, and I think that's, you know, it's so often, especially with the physical
health, you know, with the, you know, getting out and being active, you know, and I'm not,
I'm not saying, you know, well, you know, you should go out and run 5Ks together and,
you know, do these extreme things.
It's like, no, do, do the level that you're, we have, we have done crazy things together,
but you know, we haven't really done them on a consistent basis.
Like, it's like, oh, this is what we do.
We're going to go run marathons.
It's like, no, I would, I would probably throw up if I even thought about running a marathon
seriously, but yeah, I don't, I don't run.
I will cheer you on all day, all three to four hours that you're running.
I will find a golf cart and I will ride alongside of you and I will cheer.
I will be your biggest cheerleader.
I'll bring Sparks with me.
She'll run.
She will run with you.
But yeah, it's just, but again, you know, what, what level of activity is good for the
two of you?
You know, what level of activity not only is good for the two of you, but what can the
two of you have fun with?
Yeah.
Even if it's just going for a walk, go for a walk, hold hands, you know, or go to planet
fitness and hold hands while you're on the treadmill.
We have been known to do that.
We have done that together.
Yes.
Um, you know, but again, it's, it's the getting out and, and being together, you know, it's,
it's, it's another opportunity for a connection.
It's another opportunity for a, another level of conf, uh, I don't know.
I don't know why some, uh, communication.
Yes.
The word I'm looking for is communication.
Yes.
Another level of communication.
Um, because that is ultimately that's important and that needs to be a priority in our marriages.
Yeah.
I keep seeing, um, like we have a sweet, sweet friend of ours just, uh, had surgery herself
reached out to Gabriel and I, so my shout out to our sweet friend.
So, um, it's like, well, what if I can't do certain things right now?
What if I just physically just, my body is just whatever it's doing.
Right.
Um, and you know, having one surgery of or another, or maybe like something's going on
with your foot, something that you physically cannot move.
What do you do?
And I instantly saw you do card games, you do board games, you laugh, you, um, you know,
do the best you can because our sweet boy and you have decided that you're, you guys
are going to start your own business.
Yeah.
It's going to be a medicine business of some sort, but it's going to be natural and it's
going to be good.
And um, knowing that laughter does the heart good like a medicine.
And so get to a space where, you know, maybe just that you guys are laughing together,
together.
Yes.
Um, that, that, that pulls in something that, that dopamine or that chemical, whatever that
is that ties you to that person because it's like it, you are now creating a shared experience
that's making you laugh.
And I know that your laugh is one of my favorites and my life is one of your favorites.
And then once you start hearing your favorite person's laughter, it becomes even more contagious.
And it's like just knowing that all of a sudden life isn't so heavy stuff.
Isn't so right.
Um, you know, that, you know, you can see the light on the, on the other side of this,
it's going to be okay because it does it.
It creates that, you know, cause a heart deferred, you know, if you, it, it just makes it or
what is it?
Hope, hope deferred.
That was it.
Hope deferred makes a heart sick.
So if you don't have hope, that's in the word of God.
So if you do not have hope, if your hope becomes like, well, I'm never, I'm never going to
get better.
Yeah.
I'm never going to get back where I was.
I'm never, you and I've been caught up in that before.
You know, you had that rotator cuff surgery, you know, just me having babies, just stuff
happening, a standing back going, wow, I don't look like I did when we got married or I don't
do what I used to do.
And then standing back and saying, that's okay.
That's okay.
The thing is, is that we're still moving.
We're in a new season of our lives.
We're on a new path, a new journey.
This didn't take God by surprise.
And now we're going to ask him, how would you like to rebuild our body?
How would you like to redo what needs to be done, you know, to restore it, not just fix
it?
Right.
So.
I think, and I think another aspect, I'm going to shift a little bit here, talking, still
talking about physical health.
Yeah.
But I'm going to say diet.
Yes.
I'm going to say, you know, because, you know, because again, it's, it's kind of like the,
you know, it's, it's back to the, you know, somebody wants to be really active and, and
the other doesn't, you know, how that can introduce a wedge.
Yes.
I'm going to, I'm going to use that.
I'm going to use that.
Start using that a lot.
Yes.
But introduce a wedge.
Yeah.
But I think when it comes down to, to diet and, and how people eat and what people eat,
I think that can, you know, because again, it's, it's not that the two of you, it's,
I'm not saying that the two of you should be on the same meal plan.
No, because I can't eat the amount of food that you do.
Right.
But we can eat similar things.
Yes.
You know, kind of, I almost, I almost said eating out of similar buckets.
I'm like, that sounds disgusting.
At times I wouldn't mind eating out of a bucket.
Full of chicken and ribs.
Probably.
But, you know, but just, you know, again, it's, it's kind of back to, you know, I know
you and I, we've talked about, you know, making the, the, the smarter choices, making the,
the healthier choices, you know, instead of, instead of option A, maybe go with option
B.
Yeah.
You know, make, make the little, make the little steps that are, are just a little bit
better, you know, but it's like, you know, if you've got one spouse that always wants
to eat at home and eat some of like the, the fresher whole food type stuff.
Yeah.
Not the brand, but the description of food.
Yeah.
Versus the one that always wants to hit the drive through.
You know, that's, that's going to be, again, that can cause contention.
That can cause, that can introduce a wedge.
Yes.
You know, in marriage and so it's, I think, I think it's one of those, yeah.
Yeah.
Say it.
So I literally, as you're talking, I literally was seeing, dang it, dang it, dang it.
Okay.
Just going to say it.
I was seeing where it's like, okay, you've got the one spouse that can eat anything they
want to, and it appears as though nothing is changing.
Yes.
Like, I'm fine.
I don't see what your problem is.
And then it's like, but if I eat this or if I eat this, then it starts affecting my body,
my gut health.
I don't feel good.
My energy level, I don't think is clearly, see what I'm saying?
This isn't just, you're just not, we're not just talking about our waistlines here.
We're talking about our full function as far as our human beings, the makeup of who we
are.
And you've got some, but then the same spouse that is like, well, I can eat anything I want
to.
I don't know what your problem is, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.
And they're not helping that other spouse because they're seeing what's going on with
them.
And the other spouse is like, listen, I can't even fit in my pants.
I don't feel good.
This is not good.
I'm not sure what's going on.
And if the spouse that can eat anything they want to starts bashing that other spouse because
they're like, well, you should be going to the gym or you should work out more.
What are you doing?
You're not doing anything.
Knowing that this other spouse is drowning because they're trying to concede or they're
trying to please this other spouse.
Okay, no, I get it.
That's fine.
We can do this.
That's fine.
But can we do it in a moderation?
That's yours and my favorite thing.
We always tell people in moderation, unless the Holy Spirit has told you directly, no
moderation.
If it says no in the word of God, that's the no, that's a no.
Otherwise it's moderation.
You want to be aware of this person because baby, you're my counterpart.
What happens to you physically affects me.
It just does.
Just mentally, emotionally, spiritually, whatever is going on with you in that moment, it is
going to affect me.
And I need to be a good solid spouse that is an encourager.
And if I'm the one and I am the one out of the two of us, I am the one.
I can't eat just anything.
I can't.
My body says, no, thank you.
And that's okay.
You are gracious enough to say, I know that this affects my wife's gut health.
I understand that this makes Dina uncomfortable.
I don't want her uncomfortable.
I don't want her feeling gross.
Okay, babe, what can we do together that is going to satisfy the craving that's inside
of you for the massive amount of meat that you want to eat?
And at the same time, making sure that we're feeding the little rabbit that lives inside
of me at times.
And it's like, what do you do?
And it's being aware, not just of yourself, but being aware of your spouse.
That reel that you sent me where it was the man and the wife, I felt so bad.
Where, you know, he knew everything about her, like all of the favorite things, the
way she eats, all of the stuff.
She knew nothing about him.
And I proved that point this morning by bringing you something that you did not like for breakfast.
It's not your favorite.
Yes.
I was going to say it's not that I don't like it.
You ate it, but it was not your favorite.
But the fact is that it is, it's that being more intentional, being aware of each other's
health concerns.
We should be up in each other's Kool-Aid when it comes to, you know, like you went with
me to every exam when it came to my breast.
And you went with me with almost every exam when it came to Sebastian.
And the times that you didn't, we had a great support team that came.
You know, it's like...
And or I was on the phone with you.
Or you were on the phone with, yep.
You were usually on the phone on speaker listening to everything that was going on.
So it's like, be in that space with your spouse.
I for the most part have gone to every one of your major appointments with any doctors
and outside of drawing blood because we know that that wigs me out.
But I will go because I love you.
If you ask me, I will go.
So being a support, not just, hey, let's go run or hey, let's go lift some weights.
Hey, let's go whatever.
It's how are you today?
What's going on with you today?
I told you, I woke up this morning and then I told you all of the things that made my
mind kind of go, I'm in a bad space today.
I don't like anybody outside of our family today.
Sorry guys, don't like you.
And it's fine.
I'll be better.
That means it's my fault.
I'm not saying something's going on with me that I need to figure out.
Or being aware of that.
Or it's just a straight up attack.
It's a straight up attack.
There doesn't necessarily need to be something wrong with you.
It's an attack.
I appreciate that.
Probably is more of that than the other because it is something very, very dumb.
Yeah.
Something very, very dumb.
And I'll say, you know, kind of to pull back a little bit.
There, I mean, again, I do, I pay attention to a lot of, I try to absorb a lot of information,
especially when it comes to food and physical health and stuff like that.
I am not the best.
I'm not the greatest, but I at least have a lot of information.
A lot of knowledge.
Yes, thank you.
But again, the fact that the foods that we eat can also affect our mental health and
our attitudes and our personalities.
You know, I mean, outside of a marriage, I mean, just the list of things that it's like,
oh yeah, if you feed these foods to your kids, their personalities can change overnight.
And if you stop feeding these foods to your kids, they'll all of a sudden become better.
It's kind of like the shows that they watch and stuff like that.
But it's true.
There's so much stuff in the world that can affect how we live, how we walk, how we do,
what we do, if we can do.
So again, it's just, it's like I want to, I'm trying to figure out how to say, we need
to be better.
Not only do we need to be better for ourselves, but we need to be better for our spouses.
And we need to encourage our, how can we encourage the best that is in our spouses so that they
can, so they can see the best in themselves and also encourage the best in us so that
we can see the best in ourselves, so that we can encourage, so they can see.
It's a constant cycle.
Yeah, it is.
Absolutely.
And then you have your children in the mix and then it affects your children.
You know, because a lot of this comes, a lot of it comes down to, it's like, I almost want
to say what you want to see in yourself, that's what you get to encourage in your spouse.
This is one of those things where it's like, this, I think it's kind of appropriate of,
I want to see this in myself, so I'm going to encourage this in my spouse because this
is, we can then do this together.
Or it's just, again, if I encourage this in my spouse, this will push me to do better
in myself.
Right?
You know, again, if you said, you know, hey, let's run a 5K once a month, not my favorite.
I will support you and I will do my best to be with you to run a 5K a month.
Yes.
You know?
So you said that like I'm excited.
I am not endorsing this.
I am not committing to anything right now.
You all are my witnesses.
I am not committing to running a 5K a month.
I'm going to look it up.
But if you did, again, because I know this has been kind of on your heart.
It's a little bit of my bucket list.
It is on your bucket list.
I know one day you want to run at least a half marathon.
Yes.
So I'm only half crazy.
Right.
Yes.
Just simply because I want to be able to see here's, and then let me tell you guys why.
Okay?
Because I want to see what I'm capable of.
Yeah.
It's just that simple.
And I think if yours may not be a half marathon, yours may not be, you know, like you did the
strongman things and the highland games and the stuff, right?
Why do you do it?
To see what you're capable of.
I want to see what I'm capable of.
I want to see what happens when I tell myself no.
Like if I tell my flesh no, I want to see what I'm capable of when I say, you know,
it starts screaming.
I want to see what I'm capable of when I don't say stop.
I want to see what I'm capable of because I want to see everything that God has put
inside of me.
And that's just not the physical aspect, but that's like, that's our workplace.
That's us writing books.
That's us getting our certificates.
I'm going to start crying.
Like all of a sudden I was like, wow, you know, I want to see like our beautiful brown
eye girl and our sweet little guy, right?
Like why do you guys push us?
Because I want to see the potential of heaven unlock inside of you in such a way that you
can say, Whoa, like God shows up on the scene.
Heaven touches earth literally while you're doing whatever it is that you're doing.
Well it's mundane, Dina.
This is not a big deal.
We got a new dog.
We took it for a walk.
We're doing all the things are just blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.
No, see like it becomes a puzzle piece.
It becomes a catalyst.
It becomes something.
What can you do?
What are you capable of doing when, when you tell the enemy?
No, that is when, when you stop listening to the lies, when you stop allowing the roadblocks
to stand in your way, man, instead of like letting it detour, you hurdle it.
What happens or push it over?
You're a push it over.
You wouldn't be trying to hurdle it.
You're trying.
You're going to push it over and let's keep moving.
Right?
What can you do?
What are you capable of?
Because I guarantee you're not reaching the full potential of heaven in your life today.
Yeah.
And I'll, I'll also say I'll give my little also about the roadblock.
Yeah.
To, I mean, not to a degree, but pray about it.
Yes.
You know, and pray about the roadblock before you see the roadblock.
I love that.
Because when you come up to this roadblock, you know, and, and this, this is always the
tricky part.
This is always the tricky part about walking as a Christian is, is this roadblock of God
or is this roadblock of the enemy?
That's good.
You know, because there, we all know that there are times where the enemy will try to
trip us up and try to detour us off of our path, our walk with God.
Right.
To keep us from reaching our full potential.
Right.
There are also times where God will put that roadblock saying, Hey, I want you to, I want
you to put your energy over here.
Yes.
Not in this.
Yes.
You know?
And so when we see those roadblocks, when we see, you know, let's say we're having
a difficult time with our physical health, with our spouse's physical health, man, I
wish, you know, I do.
Okay.
I want to say, I do not say this, but you know, man, I wish, I wish Dina was more active.
I wish she would eat better.
Yeah.
You know, our sex life is not as like as good as it needs to be.
Right.
Okay.
How about you do something about that?
How about you help them?
What do you need to do to help them?
Yeah.
Yes.
You know, and you know, yes.
Say something.
Yes.
Say something lovingly, please.
Say something loving with, say something with the love, respect and honor of a spouse approaching
another spouse.
Yes.
You know, their spouse, not another spouse, their spouse, their spouse, approach your
spouse.
Yes.
You know, but again, pray about it.
You know, God, God, God give me the words.
Yeah.
Give me the words that I can say, you know, give me the words that are going to be impactful,
not just for my spouse, but also for me.
Yes.
Because what if it's something of I decide to say something to you and all of a sudden
it's like it comes as it comes out, it's like, oh wait, that was, that was for me.
Yeah.
You know, because that we all know that happens.
Yeah.
I mean, how many times, you know, have we like prayed for somebody or seen somebody
pray for somebody else and all of a sudden it's like, oh wait, that was actually for
me.
Yeah.
So I'm praying it over you to help you, but the words are meant to spark something in
me.
Yeah.
That's good.
Yeah.
No, that's good.
I like that, but it is, it's, it's a thing of don't harp in a space, but don't, don't
pussy foot around each other either.
Yeah.
Don't make shells, but don't nag, don't harp, don't be little.
Start setting the example, set the example.
Yeah.
And, and, and make it from a place where you say, cause ultimately here's the bottom line.
Why are you and I active?
We say this a lot.
Yeah.
Why are you and I active?
We're active cause a number one, we're accountable to what it is that our bodies are.
Okay.
How we treat our bodies.
Number two, I want to live long and prosper.
I want to, I want to run hard into my hundreds with you right there by my side.
And I don't want sickness and I don't want junk and I don't want stuff of this world,
something that I know that I could have done better.
I don't want that to be the reason why I get erased prematurely off this earth or you.
And I also, we also do it because we want to live long and prosper for our children.
And then maybe one day our grandchildren and then our great grandchildren, whatever that
looks like.
It's like, we want, we want to be good stewards with what it is that God has blessed us with.
And we don't want to be the old couple in the hospital bed.
Come on, babe.
You know, again, you know, it's like, what's wrong with, you know, like if we take, you
know, grandkids or, or great grandkids to the zoo, it's like, I want to be able to walk
with them through the zoo.
You know, we, we want to be able to do that.
Yeah.
You know, we want to be able to reach and bend and squat and walk and walk and walk
and pick up and pick up and then pick up some more.
DG, come to what you need, baby.
Yes.
Yeah.
I already have my own grandma name.
Thank you.
But yeah, it's, we want, we want to be good for, we want to be healthy.
We want to be active.
We want to be available.
Yes.
For today and for tomorrow.
Yes.
And I, man, I don't know what, father, you're being really okay.
It's fine.
I want to set an example for the church.
I want to set an example for the body of Christ.
You and I want to be able to stand in front of people and say, you can be better because
with all due respect, gluttony is one of the biggest sins that this church, that the body
of Christ allows to run rampant in the church.
It, it's unfortunate.
It's unfortunate.
Gluttony is not moderation.
Gluttony is, or not being a good steward with the body.
And that seems to be a conversation that nobody wants to have that, and it sucks.
It sucks.
It's not okay because you have, you have pastors and you have people and you have congregations.
They're dying prematurely.
Even if they're still walking around there, they're dying because they have their joints
hurt or they have excess on their bodies or whatever it diabetes, all of the different
things, cancers, the stuff that is literally being created by the toxins and the junk and
the stuff.
We are not a crunchy couple.
People call us chewy.
I think I would say that I think the term they call us is chewy because we're just enough
healthy, but we like our ice cream too, but we're going to make sure that it doesn't have
a lot of the junk in it too.
That's not the point.
The point is, is moderation, but it's also just be a good steward with what you've got.
Read the labels, figure out the things, do the stuff.
You went through that program.
It's the body by God is what it's called.
And you're literally changing 1% every day.
Do something different.
If you, if you like your sodas, drink some water.
If you don't like the taste of just water, then find like maybe some lemon or some sort
of flavoring that's going to be good.
That's natural that will digest into your system to, to help you consume your water,
to do the things.
It's like, you don't have to like throw everything out all at once.
Your body will go into a weird, weird detox, almost like coming from a drug addiction or
heroin or something like that.
If you're not careful, but if you, everything that you take out, replace it with good.
All the bad that comes out, replace it with good.
That's even our walks with Jesus.
Take out the bad, replace it with good.
And then watch your body and watch your mind, your heart, your emotions, everything start
getting better and better and stronger and stronger.
Yeah.
And again, start small, start small, you know, and, and because it is, it's, you know, the,
the original question is how do we support each other in, in physical health in our marriages?
Start small, you know, start small.
Yeah.
Start, start with where you're at and, and what, what does this look like?
You know, what, what are our goals?
You know, have a conversation.
What dear Dina, what are our physical goals for our marriage?
Yeah.
What, what do we want to look like?
What, what does our physical activity level want to look like?
Yeah.
You know, and, and I can guarantee you, I can almost guarantee you with, I can guarantee
you with 99.9% confidence that there is something on the internet, either on the internet or
you know somebody that can help you take steps towards that goal.
Yes.
I mean, I remember years ago, I was trying to, you know, what if I wanted to do this?
What if I wanted to do this?
And I actually found something that said, here's a calendar, this will take you from
the couch to running a 5k in 30 days.
I love that.
And it was, it was little things like, you know, hey, like step one, like day one was
like walk around the block.
Yeah.
You know, can you, can you walk around the block?
Can you jog a block?
Yeah.
And it wasn't like, you know, go out and run a mile, see you when you're done.
You know, it was, it was, you know, hey, can you, can you, can you jog for a block?
Yeah.
You know, can you jog for 100 feet, 200 feet?
Yeah.
You know, start small, start there.
Yeah.
You know, and then, then build, you know, because I've, I've seen it a lot of times.
People are like, oh, I'm going to get healthy, you know, especially in come January, I'm
going to get healthy.
It's my new, you know, new year's resolution.
I'm going to, I'm going to run a half marathon this year and they start day one.
Let's see if I can run five miles and day two, they're hurting.
They are so sore.
And then all of a sudden they can't run.
Yeah.
They're like, nope.
Okay.
Yeah.
Looks like I can't do this.
Thanks.
And then they quit.
Then they quit.
Or I even heard like, so say you do have a setback.
Yeah.
So you do have a day where you're just like, I can't do this or you go on a long journey.
Something happens.
You get sick, stuff like that.
Yeah.
So you get sick and you get back.
Yeah.
Just get back up on it.
Just, just keep going.
Don't stop is the point.
Yeah.
Don't stop because you see when I start having a mental situation happening inside of me,
I'll look at you and I'll say, I haven't quit and I'm not going to, I'm, we're not going
to stop.
We're going to keep going.
And if we get in the gym once in the week, if we get four out of five, whatever, you
know what I mean?
Some days it's going to look really, really good.
Some days it's not.
Yeah.
But the fact is that you're not quitting.
That's right.
Don't stop.
No.
Just don't stop.
Yeah.
So that's it.
I think, yeah.
This life is not meant to be stopped and meant to be sedentary and it's not meant, it's meant
to be lived abundantly.
Yeah.
But yeah.
So that's, that's, I think that's where we're at.
Have a conversation, start small, keep going.
I love that.
Yeah.
All right guys.
Have the best week.
Enjoy the journey.