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Hello and welcome back to another episode of Upfront and Undivided with Luke and Dean'na.

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Hi.

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Hey babe.

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How's it going?

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It's good.

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How are you?

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I'm good.

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It's episode 100.

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Come on!

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We don't have pizza, but we have guests.

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Oh, that's right.

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We have gummies.

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We have gummies.

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We have gummies.

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We have a Caila.

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We have Albany's gummies.

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We have a Hunter.

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We have gummies.

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Yes, we have.

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Okay, we...

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What do we call them?

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They're gummy worms.

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I mean, they're gummy worms.

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Gummy worms.

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They're normal gummy worms.

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That's bad.

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That's so bad.

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If we had the other gummies, this would be a completely different episode.

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Yes, it would.

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And we'd have to be check marking boxes.

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Yes, we would.

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All sorts of different tags and hashtags.

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And we have extra giggles in the background.

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We do have extra.

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I'm excited about it.

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Yes.

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I'm excited.

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Because we have Hunter and Caila Driscoll.

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Sorry, guys.

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Welcome.

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We don't have a canned situation.

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I love it.

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Welcome to the studio, the cave, the office, whatever you choose to refer to it as.

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Nerdville.

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Yeah, that's right.

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That's right.

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It looks good.

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It looks good in here.

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It's fun.

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Y'all found out that we found out more and more.

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We do.

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It's so funny because Kayla and I, we're buddies.

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We hang, we do things, we giggle, we talk.

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And periodically, I mean, we talk about y'all.

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Yeah, I'm aware.

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And it's funny because the more we talk about y'all, the more we go, dang.

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Y'all need to hang out more.

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Let's just say that.

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Y'all just need to do it because y'all are a whole lot alike.

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And her and I are a whole lot alike.

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And it's fine.

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And it's because she is.

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Caila is one of my absolute favorite people on the planet and she loves big.

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Not that I don't care about you, Hunter.

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We care about you, buddy.

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But you already know.

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It's okay.

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You already know.

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She's very easy to love.

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She is very easy to love.

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Yeah.

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And you came into my life about the time that I really needed a Caila.

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And God just knew.

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And you're the real deal.

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You and Hunter both are the real deal.

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That's actually one of the main reasons.

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Because listen, if y'all weren't, you wouldn't be sitting here.

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It's just that simple.

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You guys have so much to bring to the table.

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There's such strength and such wisdom that comes out of the two of you.

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And we just we wanted to bring you in and just have conversations like good solid conversations

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on that.

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So it's like to tell a little back history, Caila and Hunter are married.

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In case y'all didn't catch that.

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Y'all been married for almost 10 years.

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Congrats.

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Getting up on it.

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I love that.

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What are we doing for 10 year anniversary?

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Secret surprises.

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That's so good.

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I was hoping he was going to say that.

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That is husband talk for I don't have all the details down yet.

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Yes.

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I love it.

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We won't tell anybody.

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It's fine.

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It's going to be good.

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And you guys have how many babies?

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We have three beautiful girls, six and under.

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Shoot.

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I know.

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It's a wild ride.

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Isn't it Hunter?

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Yes.

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Yes.

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Very busy.

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Lots of emotions.

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We literally were having conversation about those emotions right before we hit play.

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Jesus help us.

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And you know what I'll say because I was thinking about this because I was also thinking about

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one day I want to grab Hunter for my podcast.

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Absolutely.

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But of all it seems like a lot of people that we know there's not many people that have

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just boys.

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We know a lot of people that are straight girl parents or mixed parents.

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But I mean because again y'all are three girls.

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Three girls.

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Three girls.

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Or Hunter.

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I know.

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All of Hunter's side is boys.

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It's a sister.

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So this is like Holy Spirit I need you territory isn't it Hunter?

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It is.

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It is.

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It's like Lord I thought we talked about this.

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I thought we were going to have at least one.

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There's still time.

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There's still time.

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There's still time.

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I don't think so.

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It's going to have to be miraculous.

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Listen, Caila and I have already had the conversation baby.

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They have the same situation we do.

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Oh gotcha.

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It would be a miracle from the Lord but it could still happen I guess.

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You're not opposed to it but you know you took some steps to this.

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We did didn't we?

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Aww.

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I love that.

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Your girls are the best though.

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You got some of the sweetest girls.

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You got Elena who just turned six.

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Yes.

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We got Miss Elena, Miss Ember our cute little wild middle girl.

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Listen, that girl's my spirit animal.

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She's going to be four in July.

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Four in four months mom.

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Four in four months.

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I'm going to be big.

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Four months.

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Yup.

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Yes.

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So big.

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Baby, I'm going to call her baby forever because she's my baby.

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She's going to be ten.

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And baby Estelle.

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Aww.

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My little baby Estelle.

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She's going to be 18 months next week or no two weeks from now.

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She'll be 18 months which is flew by.

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Crazy.

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Just the sweetest little.

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All three of them are just so different.

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It's cool how God does that.

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Makes them all so different huh?

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Yes.

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It is amazing how different.

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All three of them are.

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Same house.

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So much difference in personalities.

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I know.

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It's good though.

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It's not cookie cutter.

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Everybody in the house needs something a little bit different.

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A lot of molding.

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A lot of molding.

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A lot of times you're just that like Lord I know that you're the ultimate potter but

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I'm needing some of that help right now.

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I need some help sculpting very much.

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Or I'm going to break it.

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And Hunter is like the man of consistency.

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So that has been just being a daddy of girls having that just safety and consistency.

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And Hunter is just amazing at that.

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Not so much me but at least one out of two.

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Hey listen somebody's got to do it.

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And you got the broad shoulders.

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You got it.

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It's fine.

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It's fine.

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Aww.

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I love that.

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I love that.

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I'll say I mean not only are you married, you're parents, you're business owners, you're

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entrepreneurs.

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You guys have been through like ministry school.

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You guys have done ministry.

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And I'll say from my opinion I enjoy watching the two of you minister together because you

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guys really like play off of each other and strengthen.

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It's stronger when you two are together.

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It's like you guys bring something when you come together and it's really cool to see

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that come to the table.

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You want to talk on that some?

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Yeah it's interesting with our business.

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We actually use one of our tools is a personality test to kind of help us gauge different house

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strengths to put people in their lanes where they're going to flourish right.

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And so we are literally exact opposites on this chart.

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To the dot.

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To the dot.

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That's crazy.

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There's no similar part of us in that way.

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But like something Hunter and I have always said because we got I was 20 when we got married.

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Hunter was 25 but I have known Hunter since I was 16 and we were just like best friends.

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We go fishing together.

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We would just be with groups of people.

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We love Jesus together.

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Did things and I said even though we are 100% opposite and almost absolutely everything

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we have the same vision.

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We have the same goals about what family looks like about what business looks like about

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what ministry together looks like.

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So to be able to operate together and those things we really are like I am a piece he

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is a piece.

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I love that.

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You know so I think that's so important for couples that you know kind of going on a tangent

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here but couples that are so opposite but yet have that same vision have that same goal.

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You are literally like a powerhouse for the Lord when you can get to that place because

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I see so many marriages they will go like once you know they have they are just very

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different and then they aren't going the same direction and that's like chaos.

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That's just burn the bridge chaos.

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I mean it can work.

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It can work as long as you come together as a couple and you have those conversations.

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Our joke on the way here was that the reason that we have a business is because of Kayla.

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You know her outgoing and joy and just everyone loves her.

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I mean she goes out and she quotes still for us and wins over all the clients with her

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you know demeanor and personality and who she is.

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And our joke was we have a business because of Kayla but we still have a business today

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because of Hunter.

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We are in this house because of Kayla but we still have this house because of Hunter.

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Yes.

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Yes.

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Because you are the anchor man.

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Like literally like you are the anchor in the midst of all of this stuff and you have

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okay because you have your cleaning business.

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We are going to give your shout out so Kayla's cleaning business.

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Kayla's cleaning crew.

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Kayla's cleaning crew.

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And so it's like so you do house cleaning.

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Yes.

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And I bless you Hunter you are working with nothing but girls.

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Yes.

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Good Lord dude.

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Surrounded.

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Completely surrounded.

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And you are the one that trains them right?

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Is that what I understand?

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I have and then we have worked it in now to where I have an awesome field manager that

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also does it with us.

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Good.

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Yes.

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She is taking some of that load so I am going to work myself out of a little bit of it.

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I could see just freaking killing it already.

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It's so cute.

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And that's why I tell him like he comes in with just those sometimes those father eyes

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you know with some of I mean some of the girls that we have had that have come through like

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they have even said to me you know like I have never had a dad or you know I remember

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one specifically I come out of like she was just fostered.

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Yeah.

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And then she came in to our company and really bringing the Lord to them in a tangible way

270
00:10:40,120 --> 00:10:43,840
and Hunter just has that like just that dad.

271
00:10:43,840 --> 00:10:48,480
Like you he I've heard that before from the girls like he like walks in and like okay

272
00:10:48,480 --> 00:10:52,200
dad's here so everything's going to come in order but I'm also maybe scared a little.

273
00:10:52,200 --> 00:10:53,200
Yeah.

274
00:10:53,200 --> 00:10:54,200
I might be in trouble.

275
00:10:54,200 --> 00:10:55,200
That's awesome.

276
00:10:55,200 --> 00:10:56,200
I love that.

277
00:10:56,200 --> 00:11:04,640
So yeah we started out like seven years ago now.

278
00:11:04,640 --> 00:11:11,680
I think about seven years and then about two years and I would say I started growing to

279
00:11:11,680 --> 00:11:15,680
the point where I said Hunter I need help.

280
00:11:15,680 --> 00:11:18,880
I remember sitting down literally like trying.

281
00:11:18,880 --> 00:11:24,560
Okay this is part of my this is where Hunter is my what I need.

282
00:11:24,560 --> 00:11:28,880
I'm like sitting there 22 years old or 23.

283
00:11:28,880 --> 00:11:32,960
I've literally cleaned for three months and I'm going to reconcile right now for the last

284
00:11:32,960 --> 00:11:33,960
three months.

285
00:11:33,960 --> 00:11:36,960
I have not kept track of who's paid me and who hasn't.

286
00:11:36,960 --> 00:11:37,960
I have.

287
00:11:37,960 --> 00:11:39,440
Yeah I just assume everyone's paid me.

288
00:11:39,440 --> 00:11:44,760
I assume everybody has you know like you know I haven't missed anything I'm sure.

289
00:11:44,760 --> 00:11:48,800
And like I'm trying to reconcile and I'm sitting down I'm just like bawling I'm like I'm like

290
00:11:48,800 --> 00:11:50,880
three thousand dollars off.

291
00:11:50,880 --> 00:11:54,000
I can't figure it out.

292
00:11:54,000 --> 00:11:58,480
And then finally it was like Hunter's like all right I'm taking I'm reconciling every

293
00:11:58,480 --> 00:12:04,000
single day I'm taking over this I'm doing that just that side like that's beautiful.

294
00:12:04,000 --> 00:12:05,000
I know.

295
00:12:05,000 --> 00:12:06,000
Yeah.

296
00:12:06,000 --> 00:12:07,000
No that's beautiful.

297
00:12:07,000 --> 00:12:10,800
He's like Kayla even though you think everyone means well and everyone's paid you people

298
00:12:10,800 --> 00:12:12,480
forget you know.

299
00:12:12,480 --> 00:12:13,480
Yes.

300
00:12:13,480 --> 00:12:14,480
No it's true.

301
00:12:14,480 --> 00:12:15,480
Absolutely.

302
00:12:15,480 --> 00:12:21,640
So just that kind of stuff where he just filled in in that way you know as we grew and really

303
00:12:21,640 --> 00:12:25,640
kept you would just do that like problem solving in the background.

304
00:12:25,640 --> 00:12:28,760
Okay this is a real problem now let's take the emotion out.

305
00:12:28,760 --> 00:12:30,560
How can we actually fix this you know.

306
00:12:30,560 --> 00:12:31,560
Yeah.

307
00:12:31,560 --> 00:12:35,800
Able to really remove that emotion with our team because us women we bring emotion we

308
00:12:35,800 --> 00:12:41,560
bring care and good emotion you know to really help drive us to do a good job and Hunter

309
00:12:41,560 --> 00:12:43,680
can he's good you're really good at that babe.

310
00:12:43,680 --> 00:12:47,560
I'm just going to shout you out to that you're able to separate emotion and say okay like

311
00:12:47,560 --> 00:12:49,440
what do we need to do to fix this.

312
00:12:49,440 --> 00:12:51,280
Yeah no drama.

313
00:12:51,280 --> 00:12:55,000
Let's just fix this together and move on happily you know.

314
00:12:55,000 --> 00:12:56,000
So you've been.

315
00:12:56,000 --> 00:13:00,920
Yeah I mean I have a big heart like I really do care for everybody on our team obviously

316
00:13:00,920 --> 00:13:05,120
and we have people that come from every walk and different areas of life and having them

317
00:13:05,120 --> 00:13:11,000
come in we are acronym for our company's peace so you know having the passion the excellence

318
00:13:11,000 --> 00:13:15,560
the adaptability the communication and an eagerness to help each other succeed in our

319
00:13:15,560 --> 00:13:21,760
around our clients and so we try to create that as an atmosphere for each other and for

320
00:13:21,760 --> 00:13:26,400
our clients and so that we're bringing peace into every home and so I try to you know we

321
00:13:26,400 --> 00:13:30,240
try both of us all of our team we try to hold each other accountable to creating that kind

322
00:13:30,240 --> 00:13:34,080
of atmosphere for each other so that we want to come to work together we want to be a part

323
00:13:34,080 --> 00:13:39,520
of this team and enjoy our jobs and so I'm being able to I try to come in is that always

324
00:13:39,520 --> 00:13:43,120
that anchor point you know there's I know our girls face a lot of challenges and situations

325
00:13:43,120 --> 00:13:48,320
and they have lives you know outside have a lot of you know pull on them yeah and so

326
00:13:48,320 --> 00:13:54,200
being able to come in and help them just to be that consistency and just you know steadiness

327
00:13:54,200 --> 00:13:57,520
for them to be able to have because they're gonna have off days but then you come in you

328
00:13:57,520 --> 00:13:59,600
come alongside them and you say how can I help.

329
00:13:59,600 --> 00:14:04,720
How can I help you in this circumstance we've really reached and we've tried to it's hard

330
00:14:04,720 --> 00:14:08,880
not to mix the personal and the boss you know but we have really tried to reach out and

331
00:14:08,880 --> 00:14:14,520
help a lot of our girls through some different circumstances to succeed in life so.

332
00:14:14,520 --> 00:14:20,480
That's beautiful that speaks volumes of both of you though like like genuinely okay it's

333
00:14:20,480 --> 00:14:27,520
one of those like I'm listening to you just say I need help and the fact that you're coming

334
00:14:27,520 --> 00:14:35,080
alongside like here's Kayla like literally just she's drowning right and you see as opposed

335
00:14:35,080 --> 00:14:38,960
to pushing any more pressure on her hunter it's like all of a sudden you're like you

336
00:14:38,960 --> 00:14:46,120
know listen let me what can I do to help you succeed because understanding that when we

337
00:14:46,120 --> 00:14:50,760
as that's where the married couple comes into play right it's like when we understand that

338
00:14:50,760 --> 00:14:59,720
our spouses are in desperation our job is not to go well if you gosh Kayla if you had

339
00:14:59,720 --> 00:15:06,320
just you didn't do that like and that that's beautiful and then the fact that Kayla here

340
00:15:06,320 --> 00:15:10,760
you are this is your baby like right like this is your business this is your baby and

341
00:15:10,760 --> 00:15:18,560
the fact that you're just like here I trust you to help me do whatever needs to do and

342
00:15:18,560 --> 00:15:25,320
so it's like both of you coming in and in understanding just not just the dynamic of

343
00:15:25,320 --> 00:15:31,160
the situation but understanding each other and it's like that that speaks volumes when

344
00:15:31,160 --> 00:15:37,060
it comes to just marriage relationships you know business businesses I mean that these

345
00:15:37,060 --> 00:15:41,680
are just practical applications that you're just putting into play and saying this is

346
00:15:41,680 --> 00:15:48,880
actually something that can work in every area of your life if you just apply it and

347
00:15:48,880 --> 00:15:56,120
start with yourself yes and so what would I love all that so like what are some practical

348
00:15:56,120 --> 00:16:01,160
applications maybe because one of the things that I sent you a list yes and I see that

349
00:16:01,160 --> 00:16:05,180
you have notes I think you guys are the first people that have ever come into our room and

350
00:16:05,180 --> 00:16:10,200
have notes this should not surprise us because ladies and gentlemen this is also the the

351
00:16:10,200 --> 00:16:17,760
people that are over our marriage group at our church and so they they are so so prepared

352
00:16:17,760 --> 00:16:22,480
y'all are cool y'all are cooler than cool I literally am reading the text that I text

353
00:16:22,480 --> 00:16:28,760
you at whatever time that's how prepared I am but it's like what are some practical things

354
00:16:28,760 --> 00:16:34,880
that you guys do to keep yourselves like not just in the business aspect but just keep

355
00:16:34,880 --> 00:16:41,400
yourselves in love keep yourselves in the relationship like before you guys came like

356
00:16:41,400 --> 00:16:45,640
I'm hollering at you going oh my gosh I'm having to work today and I forgot about voting

357
00:16:45,640 --> 00:16:49,880
and can we push this back an hour can you just go look at your husband face and just

358
00:16:49,880 --> 00:16:54,840
have something to eat and just be still y'all go have a date like go actually have a date

359
00:16:54,840 --> 00:16:59,440
you know but it's like what are some practical things that you guys can do on it on a daily

360
00:16:59,440 --> 00:17:04,960
just even if if like talking to the business people the couples talking to just married

361
00:17:04,960 --> 00:17:10,560
couples what would be some things that you guys would say so I will say that all of these

362
00:17:10,560 --> 00:17:16,800
we are still working on and we are not mastered at oh girl girl at all there's no judgment

363
00:17:16,800 --> 00:17:23,240
here but I'll kind of go on one of them and let you take a hunter we just kind of wrote

364
00:17:23,240 --> 00:17:30,000
little snippets down so okay yes prompt me to remind me to mention this here but one

365
00:17:30,000 --> 00:17:37,080
thing that we really had to learn especially having littles and owning a business and at

366
00:17:37,080 --> 00:17:42,600
home a lot even because we have a small office but we're not like in an office in front of

367
00:17:42,600 --> 00:17:47,440
people all day long right so we're at home we're homeschooling we're we've got kind of

368
00:17:47,440 --> 00:17:53,200
it's very every day is different right hunter we've kind of got things are just moving and

369
00:17:53,200 --> 00:18:01,200
flowing all the time is really setting scheduled times to talk about business stuff because

370
00:18:01,200 --> 00:18:07,040
I am naturally me knowing me I am like if I have a thought I'm just gonna say it like

371
00:18:07,040 --> 00:18:11,680
and it could be a thought way over here about finances or it could be a thought way over

372
00:18:11,680 --> 00:18:20,720
here about this friend that I met the other day and girl yes yes and it could be a thought

373
00:18:20,720 --> 00:18:29,080
about like wow like my own mental health or whatever it could be and hunter is naturally

374
00:18:29,080 --> 00:18:36,320
you would say hunter you are very like task in and out like I'm a processor yes so you

375
00:18:36,320 --> 00:18:41,040
want like let's talk about this until it's done let's talk about this and then finish

376
00:18:41,040 --> 00:18:46,520
this point and you like tasks so yeah I mean I like to complete things it's just naturally

377
00:18:46,520 --> 00:18:51,040
my personality to wanna you know I think that's a lot of guys is you wanna cuz when she's

378
00:18:51,040 --> 00:18:55,880
thrown out those ideas you know I've been guilty of this and I'm I think a lot of guys

379
00:18:55,880 --> 00:19:01,560
are like okay is that I have to take a pause and here you just wanting to share and and

380
00:19:01,560 --> 00:19:05,400
you are you wanted me to just listen or you wanted me to try to solve because I naturally

381
00:19:05,400 --> 00:19:09,720
am a solver and do I need to do something right yes I'll solve it but do I need to take

382
00:19:09,720 --> 00:19:14,960
action on yes yeah yes so that's kind of what we've had to learn is I want her to be able

383
00:19:14,960 --> 00:19:19,320
you know talk out loud and be able to that's how she processes and then I'd sometimes need

384
00:19:19,320 --> 00:19:23,400
that time to think about what she says and so when it's popcorn it's like okay okay okay

385
00:19:23,400 --> 00:19:30,200
okay yeah and then it creates a really stressful environment really quick so we we work our

386
00:19:30,200 --> 00:19:36,960
best together in business realm when I have a thought write it down I love that write

387
00:19:36,960 --> 00:19:41,000
it down it could be about anything like like with business if I have thoughts write it

388
00:19:41,000 --> 00:19:47,400
down and we have scheduled times that we look each other face to face yeah and we say okay

389
00:19:47,400 --> 00:19:54,060
in this area this this this this how do how can we go about this in this area kids homeschool

390
00:19:54,060 --> 00:19:58,880
this this this this this you know how can we do this and so really actually having scheduled

391
00:19:58,880 --> 00:20:04,120
times so that it's not this well remember I talked to I talked to you about this like

392
00:20:04,120 --> 00:20:08,880
yesterday well that was in the middle of Hunter making breakfast over here and this employee

393
00:20:08,880 --> 00:20:15,080
calling because they can't find the trash bags you know underneath the client's kitchen

394
00:20:15,080 --> 00:20:20,360
cabinet you know right right so creating those times especially if you are in a job together

395
00:20:20,360 --> 00:20:26,080
you are home together all the time schedule them like seriously schedule out those times

396
00:20:26,080 --> 00:20:31,360
where you can look each other in the eyes and like really go to either solving or put

397
00:20:31,360 --> 00:20:35,660
it in the solve box put it in the think about box put it in the we're gonna touch on this

398
00:20:35,660 --> 00:20:41,600
three months later box and I mean we do if we do that quite frequently which is the high

399
00:20:41,600 --> 00:20:47,160
level that we're at with yeah I think basically yeah and being intentional right yes being

400
00:20:47,160 --> 00:20:51,960
intentional because there is so many things coming at us and when you're working together

401
00:20:51,960 --> 00:20:57,880
as a couple the tendency in the rut to fall into real easily the snare is that what you've

402
00:20:57,880 --> 00:21:02,920
spent all day you know co-laboring doing things but at the same time has that really been

403
00:21:02,920 --> 00:21:08,440
quality time has that been intentional and that's that's the snare that we have to really

404
00:21:08,440 --> 00:21:13,360
navigate and say okay even though we've been plowing you know and sometimes even button

405
00:21:13,360 --> 00:21:17,920
you know heads at times to really you have to get through some of the days because we're

406
00:21:17,920 --> 00:21:22,040
working out each other's strengths and just how we need to handle situations then being

407
00:21:22,040 --> 00:21:26,400
able to take that time and say well you know we really need quality though now so that

408
00:21:26,400 --> 00:21:31,120
is that is something we've had to practically walk out is having the quality still and really

409
00:21:31,120 --> 00:21:37,040
like yeah just scheduling out and then one other thing that we frequently do is we ask

410
00:21:37,040 --> 00:21:45,960
ourselves okay what percentage are you on today babe 10% 30% like sometimes I'll look

411
00:21:45,960 --> 00:21:49,520
at hunter and I can I'm like where are you at on percentage and he'll say it's usually

412
00:21:49,520 --> 00:21:53,000
when we're getting trying to get the girls in the bed yeah something like that or like

413
00:21:53,000 --> 00:21:55,800
it's the middle of the day and it's crazy you have anything left in your tank Hunter's

414
00:21:55,800 --> 00:22:00,400
like you know 10% you know I'm like all right then I know where I need to pick up or he'll

415
00:22:00,400 --> 00:22:06,120
ask me where you are I'm like three go take a shower I'll take care of the rest you know

416
00:22:06,120 --> 00:22:13,440
that's our way of like really communicating when we're trying to in the ebb and flow of

417
00:22:13,440 --> 00:22:19,960
work and ministry and it's like okay where are you at where can I pick up the 97 if you're

418
00:22:19,960 --> 00:22:25,040
the three or the 50 if you're the 50 or whatever you know yeah and that's me being able to

419
00:22:25,040 --> 00:22:29,480
communicate without or hunter being able to communicate with out having to like explain

420
00:22:29,480 --> 00:22:35,520
all of his exhaustion frustration you know at that moment like I'm 20 yeah I need a break

421
00:22:35,520 --> 00:22:40,640
you know that's really good that is good we should try that yes we should see look at

422
00:22:40,640 --> 00:22:48,720
y'all y'all teaching us stuff yeah oh dogs new tricks and then I wanted to say this because

423
00:22:48,720 --> 00:22:57,280
um maybe maybe it's just a me thing or maybe it's kind of a woman thing yeah um is allowing

424
00:22:57,280 --> 00:23:03,840
like one of the struggles when we first really moved into working together 24 7 yeah um was

425
00:23:03,840 --> 00:23:13,760
really allowing me letting go and allowing hunter to fully run in his lane love that

426
00:23:13,760 --> 00:23:20,160
I love that and if that if like literally I know it sounds however you want to take

427
00:23:20,160 --> 00:23:26,160
it but like if that's even letting him like I would rather him make a mistake yeah in

428
00:23:26,160 --> 00:23:32,200
his lane than me like come over and get in his get in his lane make him trip because

429
00:23:32,200 --> 00:23:40,520
I'm in his lane come on you know yes or uh not letting him just be fully who he is yes

430
00:23:40,520 --> 00:23:46,520
in our business or fully who he is as my you know as my husband who fully is as the father

431
00:23:46,520 --> 00:23:51,720
of our kids absolutely letting him fully be in it and I think that's part of you know

432
00:23:51,720 --> 00:23:57,920
when God does that with us right let's just fully be in it and he's not he's not he's

433
00:23:57,920 --> 00:24:06,360
not always you know let he lets us fall down yes he does yes he does you know so letting

434
00:24:06,360 --> 00:24:11,320
go of that control like hunter's so good about that already like he's like Kayla you do it

435
00:24:11,320 --> 00:24:17,280
you go you go be everything you know and then I still sometimes like still sometimes will

436
00:24:17,280 --> 00:24:20,960
like try and like well don't you think we need to do this over here or what about this

437
00:24:20,960 --> 00:24:26,560
he's like am I in my lane or am I not in my lane I'm like oh you're right you're so right

438
00:24:26,560 --> 00:24:31,000
I love how y'all talk to each other that's so good it's cute she usually she asked me

439
00:24:31,000 --> 00:24:34,160
even like today like two or different two or three different things and like I don't

440
00:24:34,160 --> 00:24:37,640
even notice it sometimes and then it's like and but it was funny because it was our other

441
00:24:37,640 --> 00:24:40,600
employees were involved too and it's like oh yeah he's already done that oh yeah he's

442
00:24:40,600 --> 00:24:46,480
already done that oh yeah so it's it is fun it's she she she she cares and that's what

443
00:24:46,480 --> 00:24:50,560
and I and that's what I have to recognize too and it's not that she's trying to nitpick

444
00:24:50,560 --> 00:24:55,400
or anything like that she just she really loves and cares a lot about you know helping

445
00:24:55,400 --> 00:25:00,560
people succeed and we care about you know we're we have found something that we enjoy

446
00:25:00,560 --> 00:25:03,880
really this is something that we can care for people we're going into their homes we're

447
00:25:03,880 --> 00:25:08,600
going into their spaces and we're taking care of kind of their their places their their

448
00:25:08,600 --> 00:25:12,780
places of with their families of intimacy and their places where they're doing life

449
00:25:12,780 --> 00:25:17,960
together and so we get to we get invited into that and so we really care about who we're

450
00:25:17,960 --> 00:25:22,600
sending into people's homes and taking care of those people so so that's what I have to

451
00:25:22,600 --> 00:25:28,320
just recognize and step back and like okay she just cares she cares she cares she cares

452
00:25:28,320 --> 00:25:34,480
she trusts me don't want this to get missed over here you know did this get done I don't

453
00:25:34,480 --> 00:25:39,920
want anyone to fail I never want anyone you know and but yeah I just letting people fully

454
00:25:39,920 --> 00:25:45,360
be in their lane letting them make mistakes or rise like letting I mean Hunter lets me

455
00:25:45,360 --> 00:25:49,400
make mistakes mistakes aren't a bad thing though no see and I think that that's what

456
00:25:49,400 --> 00:25:53,360
that's one of those stigmas right it's like you made a mistake no man you just tried right

457
00:25:53,360 --> 00:25:57,640
now you get to learn and now we get to do it better next time you know it's like teaching

458
00:25:57,640 --> 00:26:02,800
you got three that are learning to the walking and this stuff right I was gonna say I had

459
00:26:02,800 --> 00:26:08,680
this conversation with Sebastian yeah Sunday did you know after Easter lunch and everything

460
00:26:08,680 --> 00:26:15,520
because my parents brought him like he had they got him a slinky like the old school

461
00:26:15,520 --> 00:26:19,880
and they decided since it didn't go down the stairs very well they were gonna buy the three

462
00:26:19,880 --> 00:26:24,000
pack of all the three different sizes you know so you get the small medium large and

463
00:26:24,000 --> 00:26:30,120
he's he's had plastic slinkies in the past and now these are like the original metal

464
00:26:30,120 --> 00:26:37,520
slinkies and he was playing with the smallest one maybe 10 minutes you already know I'm

465
00:26:37,520 --> 00:26:42,680
looking at hunters face and it got twisted and kinked and he's like oh no and so I like

466
00:26:42,680 --> 00:26:46,760
straightened it out for him and he looks at it he's like but it's not going back I'm like

467
00:26:46,760 --> 00:26:53,560
yeah it's metal it's not going to waterworks tears just I'm like okay and I pull them aside

468
00:26:53,560 --> 00:26:59,360
put them in a closed room and I'm like okay it's a mistake it's it's it's a mistake we

469
00:26:59,360 --> 00:27:04,840
get to learn this is you know you can you can still use it it's not like the original

470
00:27:04,840 --> 00:27:11,800
but you can still have fun with it yes you can still it's a still a toy then I come in

471
00:27:11,800 --> 00:27:17,360
behind you because he's playing with it down here and like throws it in a bucket and I

472
00:27:17,360 --> 00:27:26,880
went no no no that's going in the trash and he goes looks over at Luke he's like but you

473
00:27:26,880 --> 00:27:38,200
said I could keep it and I'm like no no we're not no the cleaner and me see I just no no

474
00:27:38,200 --> 00:27:45,680
it's broken we're throwing it away it's it's okay again you learn you you take the moment

475
00:27:45,680 --> 00:27:52,440
and then you just and you grow yeah our kids teach us life lessons don't they and I was

476
00:27:52,440 --> 00:27:56,840
going to say I mean kind of what Kayla you were saying about you know hunter you know

477
00:27:56,840 --> 00:28:01,440
staying in his lane and thriving in our lanes and stuff like that it's like it reminds me

478
00:28:01,440 --> 00:28:06,560
of a couple things you know Dina one of your favorite things is sayings is let the boy

479
00:28:06,560 --> 00:28:13,840
be the boy yeah you know she and and when we were early in our relationship I think

480
00:28:13,840 --> 00:28:21,280
it was before we were married she was actually getting prayer you know hearing from hearing

481
00:28:21,280 --> 00:28:27,440
from God yeah and you know the question you know because I was I was still a new Christian

482
00:28:27,440 --> 00:28:32,960
when we got together and she was having conversations with God of you know are you serious what's

483
00:28:32,960 --> 00:28:40,160
going on but what about what about and he said something long lines of Dina if you try

484
00:28:40,160 --> 00:28:46,400
to change him or fix him you are going to destroy him yeah exactly loud right there

485
00:28:46,400 --> 00:28:51,400
it's loud yes and it was it was one of those moments where you just stand back and you

486
00:28:51,400 --> 00:28:55,800
say whoa and he started saying you need to let the boy be the boy yes because me being

487
00:28:55,800 --> 00:29:01,720
a single mom I was mom and dad for a very long time right and I was raised in a household

488
00:29:01,720 --> 00:29:06,880
of blessings man but I was raised with all the boys right like all the boys and I'm the

489
00:29:06,880 --> 00:29:12,000
I'm the surprise girl I'm the first girl out of seven generations of boys that's how long

490
00:29:12,000 --> 00:29:18,720
it came right and so it's and then I have a mom who's very tomboyish and this is what

491
00:29:18,720 --> 00:29:24,880
we're going to do and like she is fascinating but it was one of those where so it's like

492
00:29:24,880 --> 00:29:31,240
when when he said that it was it wasn't a thing of like you always hear the negative

493
00:29:31,240 --> 00:29:35,920
of you know boys will be boys and they're just whatever the right the yucky that comes

494
00:29:35,920 --> 00:29:45,160
with it this was he is designed specifically to do certain things and yes you can but why

495
00:29:45,160 --> 00:29:51,000
would you want to yes why would you want to there's like you guys are designed to do certain

496
00:29:51,000 --> 00:29:55,600
things that like yes we can like what you're saying Kayla like you know like you're looking

497
00:29:55,600 --> 00:29:59,060
at Hunter going like no I trust you I know you can do it I know you can do it this isn't

498
00:29:59,060 --> 00:30:02,040
a thing of it like it but I'm a control freak and I'm having a problem right now and this

499
00:30:02,040 --> 00:30:06,000
is just what's going on I will speak for myself okay I'll just take you out of the equation

500
00:30:06,000 --> 00:30:12,640
but I'm pretty sure you're in that boat with me you know and it was it was just like let

501
00:30:12,640 --> 00:30:18,940
the boy be the boy let let let him open the door you know you're just because somebody

502
00:30:18,940 --> 00:30:25,040
cares for you like it took Gabriel long oh my gosh it took Gabriel very long time I'm

503
00:30:25,040 --> 00:30:32,880
not a baby for her to let Luke open the doors for her yeah you're talking about vulnerability

504
00:30:32,880 --> 00:30:38,420
really yeah because it takes it takes vulnerability to allow people other people to run in their

505
00:30:38,420 --> 00:30:42,480
lanes and even stumble and fall like because it because I don't like seeing you don't like

506
00:30:42,480 --> 00:30:46,120
seeing your own kids you don't like seeing your spouse yeah no you don't like it you

507
00:30:46,120 --> 00:30:50,360
know when they have to fail at times and it hurts because sometimes it hurts you know yeah

508
00:30:50,360 --> 00:30:54,520
and but I've had to learn that with just some of our kids too right you have to allow them

509
00:30:54,520 --> 00:30:57,920
just to see for themselves sometimes in a safe atmosphere you know I'd rather have them

510
00:30:57,920 --> 00:31:02,440
learn under my wings and help you know then I'll just learn from that in a positive way

511
00:31:02,440 --> 00:31:07,800
then then get out in the world and experience and choose a path then you know so correct

512
00:31:07,800 --> 00:31:12,960
yeah the vulnerability of allowing people to be who they are is it sometimes hurt your

513
00:31:12,960 --> 00:31:16,440
heart at times and it leaves you in a state of oh you know like I've got to allow this

514
00:31:16,440 --> 00:31:20,960
person to run the race and run their lane you know yeah and it takes a preconceived

515
00:31:20,960 --> 00:31:26,040
ideas out of it right and just like all of a sudden we're morphing each other into people

516
00:31:26,040 --> 00:31:31,800
that we we weren't created to be even our own children like right and it and it's like

517
00:31:31,800 --> 00:31:36,280
it was it was when when the Holy Spirit like he loud and clear said you know if you change

518
00:31:36,280 --> 00:31:42,520
if you try to change him you're going to destroy him and everything that in my mind that needed

519
00:31:42,520 --> 00:31:49,240
to be fixed was everything that is beautiful that people see with Luke like is everything

520
00:31:49,240 --> 00:31:55,320
that's good right how twisted and how sad so that shows the brokenness inside of me

521
00:31:55,320 --> 00:31:59,960
kind of like what Hunter saying like just being vulnerable saying okay I'm not going

522
00:31:59,960 --> 00:32:04,960
to try to fix you Holy Spirit you come the fact that you guys are are literally mirror

523
00:32:04,960 --> 00:32:09,920
opposites shows you how much you allow the Holy Spirit to come into both of your lives

524
00:32:09,920 --> 00:32:17,080
and just meld meld together and and take the competition off you know let's we're going

525
00:32:17,080 --> 00:32:22,080
to take the gloves off we're not fighting each other but we're fighting for something

526
00:32:22,080 --> 00:32:29,440
and and that's that's what's beautiful to see and to hear from you guys yeah so good

527
00:32:29,440 --> 00:32:35,720
so one of the other things that I had mentioned to you guys because again we mentioned how

528
00:32:35,720 --> 00:32:40,440
you guys are over our marriage group at our church and can I just give you all a shout

529
00:32:40,440 --> 00:32:51,600
out like y'all are legit like I already said it but to see that you guys have such a heart

530
00:32:51,600 --> 00:33:00,600
for the marriage you you have such a heart for the generations and you know you know

531
00:33:00,600 --> 00:33:08,000
the gravity that comes with us and you know and you guys don't take it lightly like you

532
00:33:08,000 --> 00:33:13,480
know just kind of the conversations we've had just kind of you know like why are we

533
00:33:13,480 --> 00:33:20,440
not doing more why are we what can we do what can we do how can we do more you know and

534
00:33:20,440 --> 00:33:29,560
a lot of it is because the last question that I had sent to y'all was what I wanted to know

535
00:33:29,560 --> 00:33:36,320
what you guys see as the attacks of marriages in the body of Christ because it's there and

536
00:33:36,320 --> 00:33:47,520
it's alive and there's a lot and there's a lot wow it's like which one do we want to

537
00:33:47,520 --> 00:33:53,640
even touch on first I guess I think one of them I mean specifically talking about the

538
00:33:53,640 --> 00:34:01,880
body of Christ rather than even necessarily like the world right yes I would say busyness

539
00:34:01,880 --> 00:34:09,760
for the cause of Christ quote quote shoot girl right come on busyness for the sake

540
00:34:09,760 --> 00:34:14,240
of Christ is unbiblical unbiblical where people have literally laid their marriages

541
00:34:14,240 --> 00:34:23,840
down for like women lay down their own marriage for their own ministry you know or just couples

542
00:34:23,840 --> 00:34:28,760
putting ministry before their marriage or putting the church before their marriage and

543
00:34:28,760 --> 00:34:34,920
it's almost like this religious thing that gets in our heads or we have to look a certain

544
00:34:34,920 --> 00:34:41,580
way because we're in ministry or we have to look a certain way because we go to church

545
00:34:41,580 --> 00:34:48,040
three times a week that is putting ministry before your marriage like not allowing God

546
00:34:48,040 --> 00:34:53,240
you know and I've noticed that like even when I've been in any service like not even specifically

547
00:34:53,240 --> 00:34:59,760
to our church but just how much like if you ask a past if a pastor asks okay anybody that

548
00:34:59,760 --> 00:35:05,480
wants prayer for their marriage to come up it's like it's like you almost feel this like

549
00:35:05,480 --> 00:35:09,560
just tightening in the room like oh I can't say anything's wrong with my marriage right

550
00:35:09,560 --> 00:35:17,560
right right right but that's putting ministry before marriage it's true it's preaching it

551
00:35:17,560 --> 00:35:22,920
is and you know if you say oh come up here if you want to get healed everyone comes up

552
00:35:22,920 --> 00:35:29,000
yeah but when we start asking okay if you are you know you have some obstacles you're

553
00:35:29,000 --> 00:35:34,720
facing or you want to get prayer for your marriage nobody comes up yeah that's true

554
00:35:34,720 --> 00:35:40,680
and why is that you know and yeah I've said well that's just putting ministry before marriage

555
00:35:40,680 --> 00:35:48,520
that's putting you're putting now your look and in the church over the healthiness and

556
00:35:48,520 --> 00:35:56,400
the sacred covenant that your marriage if if our pastors say hey who needs prayer for

557
00:35:56,400 --> 00:36:02,220
like marriage I'm like my marriage could be 100% the best marriage I could be in the best

558
00:36:02,220 --> 00:36:06,320
place in my life but I'm getting prayer for my marriage yeah it is like the kingdom it

559
00:36:06,320 --> 00:36:13,600
is the kingdom force I mean like we hunter and I we are a team for God like we like that

560
00:36:13,600 --> 00:36:17,240
is the number one thing I would say one of the number one things enemies after his marriage

561
00:36:17,240 --> 00:36:24,800
because the covenant yes you are the representation of the covenant yes and I'm I'm gonna get

562
00:36:24,800 --> 00:36:29,000
prayer like that's like my most main priority of being on earth yes to make sure that my

563
00:36:29,000 --> 00:36:36,760
marriage is covered yes insecure and what and and you know taken care of by the Lord

564
00:36:36,760 --> 00:36:42,320
like yeah but for some reason we just think that if we have to come up and get prayer

565
00:36:42,320 --> 00:36:50,320
for our marriage and we must be you know and a divorce I don't know or in our hearts or

566
00:36:50,320 --> 00:36:54,560
you know we've got it's like two people that's because that vulnerability wants to come in

567
00:36:54,560 --> 00:36:59,200
and you just tapped on I can come up and say oh I need I have really bad migraines I need

568
00:36:59,200 --> 00:37:08,880
prayer it's a lot easier for some reason than saying you know I struggle with control I

569
00:37:08,880 --> 00:37:16,160
struggle with we anger I struggle with pornography whatever it is and in the middle of the marriage

570
00:37:16,160 --> 00:37:22,120
like for some reason we just allow ministry before marriage in that way so that was one

571
00:37:22,120 --> 00:37:31,840
yeah I was like wow that is that is so sad but that is true yeah I can just speak to

572
00:37:31,840 --> 00:37:36,960
that a little bit too it's kind of like that airplane analogy where they they always tell

573
00:37:36,960 --> 00:37:40,760
you to put the mask on first right before you have the kids you know and so I think

574
00:37:40,760 --> 00:37:47,160
that's you know you hear that a lot even whether it be worldly realm or Christians you know

575
00:37:47,160 --> 00:37:51,560
you get so busy so busy so busy that when you get the kids get out of the house you

576
00:37:51,560 --> 00:37:55,800
have that empty nest quote unquote like you look across and some people just see a complete

577
00:37:55,800 --> 00:38:00,800
stranger you know because they've just forsaken that covenant because they've you know even

578
00:38:00,800 --> 00:38:06,200
their children a good a good relationship right to pour into but if you're not putting

579
00:38:06,200 --> 00:38:10,800
that relationship with your spouse first yeah and you're not sowing to that yeah and you're

580
00:38:10,800 --> 00:38:17,880
not actively you know pursuing that intimacy and that covenant reality that you pledged

581
00:38:17,880 --> 00:38:22,480
you know on your wedding day to be in pursuit of then you're gonna find you know you have

582
00:38:22,480 --> 00:38:27,960
a stranger a little bit once that road comes to an end of the empty nest and so that's

583
00:38:27,960 --> 00:38:33,560
what Kayla and I talk about too is being intentional because you know we have to we have to keep

584
00:38:33,560 --> 00:38:37,400
obviously a relationship with God first and foremost but then right there on the same

585
00:38:37,400 --> 00:38:41,560
level is our relationship with our spouse right so that we can then flow out of that

586
00:38:41,560 --> 00:38:48,320
relationship to our kids and be an extension do you think you would also speak to because

587
00:38:48,320 --> 00:38:54,240
when you have that like our boys and baseball our girl was volleyball all of the things

588
00:38:54,240 --> 00:38:58,960
you know you're constantly going running doing you're creating this amazing human to do the

589
00:38:58,960 --> 00:39:08,680
thing but I think the enemy and the world has so inundated us as people like we forget

590
00:39:08,680 --> 00:39:15,200
that our kids are also looking at our marriage and we're we're missing a piece of the puzzle

591
00:39:15,200 --> 00:39:21,680
for them when they grow because it's like when Luke and I were together we decided we

592
00:39:21,680 --> 00:39:27,640
were gonna do the courtship and do our dating even differently for Gavrey's sake so that

593
00:39:27,640 --> 00:39:32,080
way she knew that there was something different and then also with our marriage we don't hold

594
00:39:32,080 --> 00:39:39,600
back we're loving we'll do dates we do the things so she knows right what to expect like

595
00:39:39,600 --> 00:39:45,600
you're the dad of the three girls and you're teaching these these young ladies that are

596
00:39:45,600 --> 00:39:51,720
going to be grown women one day what to expect when it comes to their spouses coming into

597
00:39:51,720 --> 00:39:58,360
their lives and then Kayla the same thing like what you look like as a wife as a mother

598
00:39:58,360 --> 00:40:04,640
as you know the examples and I think we do a misjustice in that space because they are

599
00:40:04,640 --> 00:40:11,000
they're looking like okay well I mean thanks for coming to all my games but like do you

600
00:40:11,000 --> 00:40:17,440
guys even like each other like I mean what's that right so right and we're putting the

601
00:40:17,440 --> 00:40:24,800
gifts of God over the covenant shoot yeah yeah it's true that's what we're doing when

602
00:40:24,800 --> 00:40:30,160
we do that so we're putting the gifts of God before the covenant before the covenant that

603
00:40:30,160 --> 00:40:36,360
we created that he created with that hunter and I decided if we and that's where then

604
00:40:36,360 --> 00:40:43,120
they all of a sudden the kids are gone and they're also then taught to put the gifts

605
00:40:43,120 --> 00:40:49,520
God gives them over the covenant that they've made with God yuck and it just becomes a cycle

606
00:40:49,520 --> 00:40:59,880
yeah yeah so that was one that was one I see your list this was another one that kind of

607
00:40:59,880 --> 00:41:06,360
just really spurred out of us as we were talking about it was letting the culture of the world

608
00:41:06,360 --> 00:41:12,960
define sex instead of the Bible that that is an attack on marriage and the body of Christ

609
00:41:12,960 --> 00:41:23,840
that we need to be teaching our children how God sees sex and and so then I asked her I'm

610
00:41:23,840 --> 00:41:29,760
like okay well then how does God see sex you know and you had a lot of really good things

611
00:41:29,760 --> 00:41:38,360
to say about that yeah some of the words that I think of are vulnerability right unifying

612
00:41:38,360 --> 00:41:45,360
innocence passionate you know passionate it's a covenant between a man and woman right and

613
00:41:45,360 --> 00:41:51,360
it's a gift yeah you know it really is a gift from God and I think that is how we need to

614
00:41:51,360 --> 00:41:56,520
be defining it you know showing and then simplifying in our relationship to our kids obviously

615
00:41:56,520 --> 00:42:01,360
with actions but then also telling them you know I know that growing up personally you

616
00:42:01,360 --> 00:42:05,920
know I didn't have a real good scope and a healthy I didn't grow up in a Christian home

617
00:42:05,920 --> 00:42:11,240
so I didn't have a scope on what a godly relationship and you know why I should be saving myself

618
00:42:11,240 --> 00:42:18,520
for marriage thank God that we both did miraculously we both did but it was I got ahold of God

619
00:42:18,520 --> 00:42:23,020
just at the right time pretty much in high school but it was now looking back it's like

620
00:42:23,020 --> 00:42:28,560
wow okay I made it through the fire but now how much more do I want to help define for

621
00:42:28,560 --> 00:42:35,200
my girls just the culture and the beauty of what a marriage is supposed to be and like

622
00:42:35,200 --> 00:42:40,200
why you want to not just the legalistic right like this is something God doesn't want you

623
00:42:40,200 --> 00:42:44,320
to do because it's a law or you know he just you know this or that but there's there's

624
00:42:44,320 --> 00:42:49,960
so much blessing there's so much empowerment there's so much life that he wants to and

625
00:42:49,960 --> 00:42:56,320
innocence that he wants to preserve yes you know and I think that is what really burns

626
00:42:56,320 --> 00:43:02,040
in our hearts yes is to just keep that innocence for people yeah and when you can define that

627
00:43:02,040 --> 00:43:09,240
for your children and portray that then you don't allow the world you know to define that

628
00:43:09,240 --> 00:43:14,480
they don't they don't get to be robbed because we're going to take an active participation

629
00:43:14,480 --> 00:43:19,880
in defining what how God sees this is something of beauty you know something of that's not

630
00:43:19,880 --> 00:43:24,280
shameful that doesn't that's not like that at all that it's just something designed by

631
00:43:24,280 --> 00:43:30,400
him to honor him to yes unify two people together to help you empower the kingdom of God and

632
00:43:30,400 --> 00:43:34,800
just keep pushing and advancing and like for us you know just that picture of being able

633
00:43:34,800 --> 00:43:39,400
to help each other like I want Kayla to succeed in her lane as much as possible you know I

634
00:43:39,400 --> 00:43:45,000
want to see her succeed I want her to be all that she is called to be in God and you know

635
00:43:45,000 --> 00:43:48,920
there's that's what's beautiful is when you have two people that just I'm not in competition

636
00:43:48,920 --> 00:43:53,080
with you like we were talking about earlier I just want to see all that God has for you

637
00:43:53,080 --> 00:43:58,080
yeah and so being able to define that for your kids and for your children and exemplify

638
00:43:58,080 --> 00:44:01,960
that I think that's definitely our heart for sure and it's just I feel like such a missing

639
00:44:01,960 --> 00:44:08,480
piece in the body of Christ like in the church itself because like thankfully like I was

640
00:44:08,480 --> 00:44:15,840
I wasn't like full on in church like from babyhood and this religious idea of like you

641
00:44:15,840 --> 00:44:19,680
know sex is bad and like it's dirty and we can't talk about it and oh my gosh we don't

642
00:44:19,680 --> 00:44:23,560
even talk about it and you just do it when you get married and you know like and that

643
00:44:23,560 --> 00:44:27,680
is so like that's why it almost brings me to tears like even as hunters talking because

644
00:44:27,680 --> 00:44:33,320
it's such a beautiful way and especially I think of this for my daughters I think of

645
00:44:33,320 --> 00:44:41,480
this for my daughters like it preserves innocence yes it does and like the innocence of I just

646
00:44:41,480 --> 00:44:47,200
thank God and thank God and thank God I look back on it not that even if you have had sex

647
00:44:47,200 --> 00:44:54,120
before marriage that God can't totally restore that and absolutely every single way but like

648
00:44:54,120 --> 00:45:00,800
for me I look at I'm like how much innocence and how much I get to I enjoy my husband because

649
00:45:00,800 --> 00:45:06,920
there's no restriction yeah you know when you really like and maybe you know if someone's

650
00:45:06,920 --> 00:45:11,640
listening this that hasn't even married yet and they're thinking oh my gosh like you know

651
00:45:11,640 --> 00:45:18,280
like like I don't know they think of it in whatever way but I'm like there's just no

652
00:45:18,280 --> 00:45:25,520
restriction there's no comparison no comparison no thumb on your come on no thumbprint on

653
00:45:25,520 --> 00:45:31,560
your heart or on your chest it's like I and I still think like not even are you preserving

654
00:45:31,560 --> 00:45:37,520
innocence in a sexual way but in a heart way like I really do just see the best in every

655
00:45:37,520 --> 00:45:41,280
single person I'm not ever thinking anyone's taking advantage of me because I've never

656
00:45:41,280 --> 00:45:47,280
been taken advantage of you know I'm I'm I can walk around like that even to my own hurt

657
00:45:47,280 --> 00:45:53,720
sometimes seeing like this person and Hunter says it a lot Kayla like like and you have

658
00:45:53,720 --> 00:45:59,400
discernment which is good because you're not like cynical you know we're like okay Kayla

659
00:45:59,400 --> 00:46:04,840
like pull it back a little bit like because I just really it because of that decision

660
00:46:04,840 --> 00:46:10,320
that I made to stay pure and innocent I mean we were I mean we really loved each other

661
00:46:10,320 --> 00:46:15,260
for good I mean we were best friends like I was 16 at time we knew we had to wait so

662
00:46:15,260 --> 00:46:18,920
nothing was gonna be happening you know yeah cuz it's gonna be a while before I get married

663
00:46:18,920 --> 00:46:24,960
but I mean we waited like we knew each other 16 I got married at 20 so that's huge really

664
00:46:24,960 --> 00:46:31,600
really really in love like for two years two and a half before we got married and I it

665
00:46:31,600 --> 00:46:36,920
was like God was saying because you made that decision for me because you did that like

666
00:46:36,920 --> 00:46:45,560
it's like it just stamped this innocence on my life yeah yeah like on my life and I just

667
00:46:45,560 --> 00:46:54,800
want every young girl every girl every woman even yeah walk in newly in Christ to know

668
00:46:54,800 --> 00:47:03,960
that that is 100% worth it and the church needs to describe sex as a beautiful sanctification

669
00:47:03,960 --> 00:47:11,560
yes innocence joy a passion a peace it's a it when we fought you know or whatever it

670
00:47:11,560 --> 00:47:16,560
brings us back together it snaps back together you know it's like God's like you guys you

671
00:47:16,560 --> 00:47:22,000
need snap back together yeah go kiss that boy instead of snapping us apart you know

672
00:47:22,000 --> 00:47:30,840
and so I just think 20 years from now it's like church never even talks about it you

673
00:47:30,840 --> 00:47:35,880
know agreed agreed so they learn it from the world and then or they are totally restricted

674
00:47:35,880 --> 00:47:41,840
and they like hate sex yeah yeah they waited and then they hate it it's it becomes a chore

675
00:47:41,840 --> 00:47:45,120
right as opposed to the gift that hunter I mean give like hunter literally said it he's

676
00:47:45,120 --> 00:47:49,880
it's a gift yes it's like here like this is something that but but you can't it's like

677
00:47:49,880 --> 00:47:56,360
Christmas you can't unwrap it yet right but but man it's but let me tell you why not just

678
00:47:56,360 --> 00:48:02,600
the goodness of it too but like like the destruction like what you were talking about like I know

679
00:48:02,600 --> 00:48:07,680
the fingerprints right like Luke and I know what you the fingerprints we understand the

680
00:48:07,680 --> 00:48:14,280
comparison we understand the things the torments we also understand the restoration we understand

681
00:48:14,280 --> 00:48:18,520
the goodness that God can even bring into that space with you but it is it's it's you

682
00:48:18,520 --> 00:48:24,400
guys are in that space of saying man if you don't have to don't just just just know that

683
00:48:24,400 --> 00:48:31,640
on the other side of this the goodness is so much better the reward is so rich and so

684
00:48:31,640 --> 00:48:39,240
good but it is it's it is a thing of it is it's it's portrayed as dirty it's portrayed

685
00:48:39,240 --> 00:48:43,800
as you know premarital sex well okay well how about we talk about what the good stuff

686
00:48:43,800 --> 00:48:48,960
is like let's talk about the good stuff like why you want to wait not just because but

687
00:48:48,960 --> 00:48:54,240
why you want to like why like yeah and I'll and I'll say you know Kayla because you're

688
00:48:54,240 --> 00:49:00,240
talking about you know the the you know especially the benefits and the innocence and all for

689
00:49:00,240 --> 00:49:08,840
for young women and for women it's the same for men you know because yes Deena and I saved

690
00:49:08,840 --> 00:49:15,000
ourselves for each other prior to us meeting especially prior to me being a Christian we

691
00:49:15,000 --> 00:49:21,760
did not save ourselves from the world right you know so right so it was like we joked

692
00:49:21,760 --> 00:49:32,980
we're like we know what it's like but we took steps from God to say we want to restore ourselves

693
00:49:32,980 --> 00:49:40,280
and I I will say I can say with confidence that our wedding night it it it felt like

694
00:49:40,280 --> 00:49:45,840
we were a pair of virgins right it was really I mean and and so it's like I mean again as

695
00:49:45,840 --> 00:49:50,240
as as much as you're saying yes it can it can you know this is what it's like for you

696
00:49:50,240 --> 00:49:55,720
know saving yourself the fact that that that everything can be restored yes you know even

697
00:49:55,720 --> 00:50:00,960
even if you didn't live a clean and perfect life it can be restored through the power

698
00:50:00,960 --> 00:50:09,360
of God oh yes absolutely yeah just as miraculous yeah sincerely both ways yeah sincerely and

699
00:50:09,360 --> 00:50:13,360
I think too let's touch on that just real quick because I do want to get to another

700
00:50:13,360 --> 00:50:19,280
thing that you guys want to talk about but let's also put in those that are even married

701
00:50:19,280 --> 00:50:24,000
now because you said that like there's pain right there's there's regret there's there's

702
00:50:24,000 --> 00:50:32,040
hurt there's it's a chore it's right it's all the things or somehow you kind of fell

703
00:50:32,040 --> 00:50:35,360
out of love and you're just kind of going through the motions or you're just doing the

704
00:50:35,360 --> 00:50:41,000
things and so it's like that's that's why I was like what are some things just even

705
00:50:41,000 --> 00:50:46,280
practically in that space that you guys would maybe suggest that some of our listeners that

706
00:50:46,280 --> 00:50:50,680
are like we're struggling like Kayla Hunter we're on the struggle bus like we're trying

707
00:50:50,680 --> 00:50:55,400
to figure this out how do we even get back into that space what would you guys suggest

708
00:50:55,400 --> 00:51:01,240
we're we're on the struggle bus and we're not brave enough to run up for prayer be sincerely

709
00:51:01,240 --> 00:51:07,240
yes yes so what would be some things one thing that just comes to my mind is I heard this

710
00:51:07,240 --> 00:51:15,400
one time this lady said sex is 80% brain 20% friction absolutely agree and I was like wow

711
00:51:15,400 --> 00:51:24,520
that is so powerful it's so true yes so I think a lot of it is in your brain right so

712
00:51:24,520 --> 00:51:32,720
even like even with Hunter and I it's like like I'm already knowing like if I am thinking

713
00:51:32,720 --> 00:51:39,640
okay like I want to have sex yes I'm already like thinking about like my brain's already

714
00:51:39,640 --> 00:51:44,960
kind of on the topic of it with him I'm already thinking about it I'm like okay like and honestly

715
00:51:44,960 --> 00:51:50,440
I go into like serve mode for him I'm thinking like okay how can I and I know Hunter you

716
00:51:50,440 --> 00:51:57,960
can talk to it too but like like okay I know his stressors I know things that totally like

717
00:51:57,960 --> 00:52:02,560
fire him off it just with life you know like different things that can come up or go on

718
00:52:02,560 --> 00:52:11,480
or whatever and yeah so I even prep my mind for it I prep my words to him you know and

719
00:52:11,480 --> 00:52:18,400
honestly even sometimes it's like like even kind of like a scheduled thing but I think

720
00:52:18,400 --> 00:52:23,880
a lot of it is getting I mean again it's like the easiest thing to say like getting closer

721
00:52:23,880 --> 00:52:31,200
to God and allowing him to really like pinpoint those things and even like talking I mean

722
00:52:31,200 --> 00:52:36,480
talking to your spouse about like being open again like instructable having indestructible

723
00:52:36,480 --> 00:52:43,340
communication like being able to open up and tell him like I was listening to someone talk

724
00:52:43,340 --> 00:52:48,520
about like how it was painful you know or this or that and being able to even just be

725
00:52:48,520 --> 00:52:58,120
open again vulnerable right and happy that is the most I think the most turn on for men

726
00:52:58,120 --> 00:53:02,160
is you being a vulnerable person and a happy person yeah that's what a husband wants it's

727
00:53:02,160 --> 00:53:07,400
a happy vulnerable person yeah you know so I mean would you agree with that Luke? Yes

728
00:53:07,400 --> 00:53:15,720
I would. Happy and vulnerable that's like the best thing and naked yes there you go

729
00:53:15,720 --> 00:53:20,680
but that just really hit me and Hunter you can talk about it too but just really we always

730
00:53:20,680 --> 00:53:25,720
think like oh it's a certain position or this or that but a lot of times it's where's your

731
00:53:25,720 --> 00:53:31,080
brain I love that where's your brain and the communication and communication is so involved

732
00:53:31,080 --> 00:53:34,840
with what's in your brain if you can't communicate what's in your brain yeah and really settle

733
00:53:34,840 --> 00:53:41,480
that and get healing or talk with your spouse about it then like no amount of friction truly

734
00:53:41,480 --> 00:53:48,480
is gonna make heal anything or make it better that's so good yeah that's so good yeah when

735
00:53:48,480 --> 00:53:52,800
we've listened to a lot of our premarital uh just counseling and different things that

736
00:53:52,800 --> 00:53:57,520
we would listen to um basically most of the time we would remember the saying saying and

737
00:53:57,520 --> 00:54:03,080
phrase that sex begins in the morning right oh yes and I think that is what you have to

738
00:54:03,080 --> 00:54:07,520
continually remind yourself of is like if you're wanting to have this special time like

739
00:54:07,520 --> 00:54:10,680
I think we've allowed and that's one of my topics we can touch on it more a little bit

740
00:54:10,680 --> 00:54:17,220
later but we've allowed culture technology movies facebook you know the Cinderella stories

741
00:54:17,220 --> 00:54:24,560
you know that everybody portrays their life to be out as right we've yeah we kind of fantasize

742
00:54:24,560 --> 00:54:29,900
and we've you know romanticized all of these things of how life should be and it really

743
00:54:29,900 --> 00:54:34,800
is about sewing you know you have to be willing to sew if you want great sex you have to sew

744
00:54:34,800 --> 00:54:39,880
for it yeah and that's gonna look different for every marriage for every person you know

745
00:54:39,880 --> 00:54:44,400
every different love language people have different love languages mine is I naturally

746
00:54:44,400 --> 00:54:48,880
like to serve others and I don't like to be in the forefront I like to be more like just

747
00:54:48,880 --> 00:54:54,120
making things come together and making things happen right so I naturally am serving whereas

748
00:54:54,120 --> 00:54:58,520
my wife has a totally different love language we've been working together all day and she

749
00:54:58,520 --> 00:55:03,400
still wants the cuddles and quality time and I'm just like I need a quiet place for just

750
00:55:03,400 --> 00:55:10,640
a little bit please and then we can come together yeah like when I'm upset like hunters like

751
00:55:10,640 --> 00:55:15,720
he's back I know this sounds so mean of me but like he's vacuuming he's doing the dishes

752
00:55:15,720 --> 00:55:21,080
he's doing all the acts of service he's doing all the things that he's thinking that doesn't

753
00:55:21,080 --> 00:55:27,760
count sweetie literally and I'm just like it's like for me it's like I don't care I don't

754
00:55:27,760 --> 00:55:33,400
care if you've done the dishes I know it sounds so bad like it was like oh Pastor James would

755
00:55:33,400 --> 00:55:36,520
be like you know just go to the dishes I'm like I don't even care about the dishes I

756
00:55:36,520 --> 00:55:41,040
don't care about the vacuuming or anything like that like like have you looked me in

757
00:55:41,040 --> 00:55:46,480
the eye and given me a hug and told me you love me and spanked my butt in the kitchen

758
00:55:46,480 --> 00:55:55,280
have you done those things like have you smiled at me and looked at me today you know like

759
00:55:55,280 --> 00:56:01,160
it's so bad and so it's just we've had funny moments like that we're hunters like I am

760
00:56:01,160 --> 00:56:07,200
you know whatever kind of mood sometimes I'll get funky he'll just be like okay like what

761
00:56:07,200 --> 00:56:15,240
else can I do like I've done these dishes I like dress the girls and put them in bed

762
00:56:15,240 --> 00:56:21,720
like I don't know what you want from me I'm like just a hug like none of that matters

763
00:56:21,720 --> 00:56:27,480
anyway I just need you to touch me and he's like okay the girl like you know Amber and

764
00:56:27,480 --> 00:56:35,000
Elena have been like all over him all day long oh and you're touched out oh crap I'm

765
00:56:35,000 --> 00:56:44,320
at a zero with my touching oh no so yeah so I think that's kind of what I go back to is

766
00:56:44,320 --> 00:56:49,960
the sewing yeah sewing to each other's love languages sewing intentionally and being able

767
00:56:49,960 --> 00:56:54,720
to kind of come back to that just in being intentional I mean we all know when people

768
00:56:54,720 --> 00:56:58,440
are just kind of just faking it to make it right right but when you're being sincere

769
00:56:58,440 --> 00:57:03,080
and you're taking the time to really really be intentional towards those different areas

770
00:57:03,080 --> 00:57:08,000
that your spouse needs and I think that's I mean even and I know that like we talked

771
00:57:08,000 --> 00:57:12,800
about going back to you know those couples that are you know on rocky ground right in

772
00:57:12,800 --> 00:57:15,960
order to soften that ground you're gonna have to do some watering that's you're gonna have

773
00:57:15,960 --> 00:57:19,720
to you're gonna have to you know you might have to break some things off you know break

774
00:57:19,720 --> 00:57:22,760
off some patterns some different things you know break up the ground and then you got

775
00:57:22,760 --> 00:57:27,280
to start so watering you know so that those seeds can actually start so there's different

776
00:57:27,280 --> 00:57:31,120
things different stages if you're in a in a hard place you know you might have to look

777
00:57:31,120 --> 00:57:35,560
at things I would always it's always easy right to just try to look at your spouse and

778
00:57:35,560 --> 00:57:38,840
like what they're doing or what you think they're doing wrong but if you really want

779
00:57:38,840 --> 00:57:43,080
to have fruit in your marriage I feel like you're gonna have to look in the mirror first

780
00:57:43,080 --> 00:57:47,840
yeah that's good and allow yourself that that's really good because I thought of that picture

781
00:57:47,840 --> 00:57:53,280
you just said when you're looking at yourself you're allowing that well from the inside

782
00:57:53,280 --> 00:57:57,600
of you right you're fixing up the well on the inside of you so that you can properly

783
00:57:57,600 --> 00:58:04,120
water that ground that's good for your spouse that's so good what was the other thing that

784
00:58:04,120 --> 00:58:08,760
you wanted to touch on well just I think we kind of touched on it a little bit already

785
00:58:08,760 --> 00:58:15,560
but the culture of the world and just the busyness I mean allowing not allowing the

786
00:58:15,560 --> 00:58:22,360
comparison I think everybody everybody I mean I'm not a social media person but I because

787
00:58:22,360 --> 00:58:27,440
I just I can kind of see through a lot of it and so it's like yeah but you're probably

788
00:58:27,440 --> 00:58:31,960
this and I you know you see through some of the just the facades of what people want to

789
00:58:31,960 --> 00:58:35,520
just push out there is like this is my life this is they always post that on the beach

790
00:58:35,520 --> 00:58:40,400
right it's always the beach photo and life is amazing and we're smiling and everything

791
00:58:40,400 --> 00:58:44,920
but it's like okay you know but on the day to day what kind of saw the ground are you

792
00:58:44,920 --> 00:58:49,880
really walking on yeah let me see how you're how you treat your children in your home when

793
00:58:49,880 --> 00:58:57,280
no one's watching you know or each other yeah and so that that is kind of the ground that

794
00:58:57,280 --> 00:59:02,440
we kind of have to renew and just look at and I would not get I think the comparisons

795
00:59:02,440 --> 00:59:07,120
are just something that you really can fall into and look in other people's lives and

796
00:59:07,120 --> 00:59:12,520
taking for granted the guy the gift God gave you how are you stewarding this relationship

797
00:59:12,520 --> 00:59:16,800
it's okay you know and just looking around too much I think sometimes too with social

798
00:59:16,800 --> 00:59:22,520
media and I think you even said this one time hunter I don't know if you remember it or

799
00:59:22,520 --> 00:59:26,560
not but like when you're looking on social media and you're seeing these couples and

800
00:59:26,560 --> 00:59:34,920
they're putting out their best face right and like you like it's almost like then you

801
00:59:34,920 --> 00:59:41,360
might see them in church and dismiss what God might be telling you to go and tell them

802
00:59:41,360 --> 00:59:45,280
or talk to them about or pray for them yeah you might dismiss it because you've already

803
00:59:45,280 --> 00:59:50,640
seen they're doing great you know what I mean and then you're allowing social media to be

804
00:59:50,640 --> 00:59:58,000
the dictator of your walk with Christ to help others rather than what the Holy Spirit's

805
00:59:58,000 --> 01:00:04,480
really saying like no those that couples drowning well yeah yeah but we're believing in what

806
01:00:04,480 --> 01:00:09,320
they so I've noticed that even personally and me is like I went through a really big

807
01:00:09,320 --> 01:00:13,960
season of just I cut it all out and then I was able to really hear for people it's good

808
01:00:13,960 --> 01:00:17,920
so much better and more clear because I wasn't allowing anything I was reading on social

809
01:00:17,920 --> 01:00:21,600
media to dictate what the Holy Spirit was telling me for them you know or to pray for

810
01:00:21,600 --> 01:00:25,320
them or to speak over them like oh that person's always good they always talk about how great

811
01:00:25,320 --> 01:00:29,160
it is and they've got you know their kids do get straight A's and you know all this

812
01:00:29,160 --> 01:00:34,040
is amazing for them but really like they could try to be faceting what's really deep down

813
01:00:34,040 --> 01:00:38,640
in there that's so good yeah I mean in a way that they kind of and I know this is kind

814
01:00:38,640 --> 01:00:44,000
of kind of be a little bit of a late left turn but you know speaking of that facade

815
01:00:44,000 --> 01:00:47,560
it kind of reminds me I think it was Robin Williams that said you know some of the happiest

816
01:00:47,560 --> 01:00:53,800
people are the most depressed yeah you know because I mean along those lines I've seen

817
01:00:53,800 --> 01:01:00,200
so many especially with talking about men's mental health of just like oh here's like

818
01:01:00,200 --> 01:01:06,280
the last video that they took of you know before they and it's like everybody's laughing

819
01:01:06,280 --> 01:01:10,240
everybody's you know they're they're cutting up they're joking they're having the best

820
01:01:10,240 --> 01:01:17,160
time of their life and it is it's I mean we this is something you know with with Gabriel

821
01:01:17,160 --> 01:01:21,680
you know 19 trying to experience you know what's what's going on how's it like to be

822
01:01:21,680 --> 01:01:27,840
an adult it's like that's not real yeah what you see what you see on social media is not

823
01:01:27,840 --> 01:01:35,000
real what you see on movies and TV that is not real that's you know I remember you know

824
01:01:35,000 --> 01:01:38,240
five six years ago when she first started high school she's like high school is gonna

825
01:01:38,240 --> 01:01:42,520
be like this it's gonna be like this it's like no no no it's not it's not high school

826
01:01:42,520 --> 01:01:50,880
musical babe it's not the best years of your life it's not glee yeah it's not no wow yeah

827
01:01:50,880 --> 01:01:56,600
people gabrie's age they've always only known yeah social media unless their parents have

828
01:01:56,600 --> 01:02:00,280
parented it you know but still yeah like I mean I didn't get my first phone till I was

829
01:02:00,280 --> 01:02:07,040
16 yeah I didn't have a smartphone till I was 20 you know I missed all of that high

830
01:02:07,040 --> 01:02:14,520
school so good you know I'm like wow thinking of that just like yeah they get social media

831
01:02:14,520 --> 01:02:21,160
literally tries to tell you what every stage of life is gonna be I mean with we had this

832
01:02:21,160 --> 01:02:26,760
conversation we were talking to some people yesterday I mean our our nine-year-old Sebastian

833
01:02:26,760 --> 01:02:33,320
third grade hey mom dad when can I get a phone like some of my classmates like he's had classmates

834
01:02:33,320 --> 01:02:40,160
that have had phones since they were first or second grade it's like why yeah one of

835
01:02:40,160 --> 01:02:46,680
them said you don't even know how to spell how can you text your friend it's like but

836
01:02:46,680 --> 01:02:55,240
sincerely though it I mean it just it yeah yeah yeah but it is it's it's that it's that

837
01:02:55,240 --> 01:03:00,640
it's that window into what the world is trying to say it's it's the window into what the

838
01:03:00,640 --> 01:03:08,560
world is trying to dictate yes life yeah yeah yeah yeah because I know that one thing um

839
01:03:08,560 --> 01:03:13,640
gabrie got she's sitting in the back seat and she was talking no we were talking and

840
01:03:13,640 --> 01:03:22,200
she's listening to this talk and she goes is this what marriage is like just because

841
01:03:22,200 --> 01:03:26,840
we're talking about just everyday stuff right like it's like it's not rocket science we're

842
01:03:26,840 --> 01:03:31,280
just y'all are each other's best friends for each other's best friends this is just how

843
01:03:31,280 --> 01:03:36,600
we just so what are you thinking like dinner something good or talking about the different

844
01:03:36,600 --> 01:03:41,000
produce at the grocery store or right and it's like because kind of like what you're

845
01:03:41,000 --> 01:03:47,120
saying hunter like it's it's become so romanticized or so elaborate well this is what this is and

846
01:03:47,120 --> 01:03:54,440
it's must be together in the rain or else yeah I mean that is pretty sexy but anyway

847
01:03:54,440 --> 01:04:00,000
but it's it's the everyday like you said every day you're grinding in there and you're you're

848
01:04:00,000 --> 01:04:07,320
putting in the work and I love what you said Kayla when it comes to stress like I think

849
01:04:07,320 --> 01:04:12,520
that that's one of the other things too the pressure even the pressure of being so perfect

850
01:04:12,520 --> 01:04:16,920
like I have to have an orgasm every time we're together whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa hold the

851
01:04:16,920 --> 01:04:20,920
phone the fact that you're together and you're in this space together and you're spending

852
01:04:20,920 --> 01:04:27,160
this time and you're having your your intentional I've heard that several times from both of

853
01:04:27,160 --> 01:04:34,440
you just being intentional in that time and it's like you this isn't a this isn't about

854
01:04:34,440 --> 01:04:40,080
that it's not the perfection it's the we're here we're together we get to we get to do

855
01:04:40,080 --> 01:04:47,520
this life and create and be something better than what we would have been solo you know

856
01:04:47,520 --> 01:04:54,080
and that's that's what it is or even comparing yourself just you guys are nailing it like

857
01:04:54,080 --> 01:04:59,280
you guys are nailing it these are these are some serious things that just need to be exposed

858
01:04:59,280 --> 01:05:06,040
yeah another area I don't know how much time we have but another big area that Kayla and

859
01:05:06,040 --> 01:05:10,160
I see a major attack like we kind of talked earlier about what are some different areas

860
01:05:10,160 --> 01:05:14,320
that you see kind of coming against you know Christians in the body of Christ and I think

861
01:05:14,320 --> 01:05:19,000
always another two topics that come to my mind are finances and health yes yes yes

862
01:05:19,000 --> 01:05:27,840
yeah you know those are huge huge open links in your armor if there's holes there you know

863
01:05:27,840 --> 01:05:34,760
the enemy loves those footholds oh yes because if he can get a hold of your health then it's

864
01:05:34,760 --> 01:05:41,120
ultimately gonna lead to draining the finances too right yes so it's like a two-fold whammy

865
01:05:41,120 --> 01:05:45,760
that he kind of comes after because it's kind of a compounding snowball and that's kind

866
01:05:45,760 --> 01:05:50,560
of our hearts too has really been focusing on like when it comes to finances when it

867
01:05:50,560 --> 01:05:57,200
comes to health our backgrounds we've been miraculously touched I mean so like very powerfully

868
01:05:57,200 --> 01:06:04,160
touched miraculously healed both of us just amazing and again I was touched just out there

869
01:06:04,160 --> 01:06:08,480
just so that people can hear it just real quick is that I've never knew God growing

870
01:06:08,480 --> 01:06:13,880
up until I was like 17 18 and my daddy got a hold of God and I hadn't done anything for

871
01:06:13,880 --> 01:06:17,600
the Lord you know I've been to a few vacation Bible schools as a kid or whatever but the

872
01:06:17,600 --> 01:06:23,480
first time that I encountered the father was being healed yeah and just that rebel you

873
01:06:23,480 --> 01:06:27,640
know that revelation that I have done nothing for you Lord I haven't earned this in any

874
01:06:27,640 --> 01:06:32,960
way capacity shape or form yeah and your goodness just overshadows me and heals me so we've

875
01:06:32,960 --> 01:06:38,240
had moments like that and so that's big in our lives you know really have been impacted

876
01:06:38,240 --> 01:06:43,720
by the healing hand of God and then finances or something that really being burnt into

877
01:06:43,720 --> 01:06:47,520
us and I think that kind of goes with stewardship you know like we want to be a couple that

878
01:06:47,520 --> 01:06:51,620
can be entrusted with more you know and I think the body of Christ is just kind of starting

879
01:06:51,620 --> 01:06:57,240
to wake up to the fact that you know stewardship and having money is not a bad thing right

880
01:06:57,240 --> 01:07:03,160
if money has you then yes the love of money is going to be a bad thing right but stewardship

881
01:07:03,160 --> 01:07:08,040
and having the ability to I mean you actually were mandated to multiply yeah like it's not

882
01:07:08,040 --> 01:07:12,320
even an option yeah like we need to get out of the ditch where it's like oh you know like

883
01:07:12,320 --> 01:07:16,320
we're you know like we're struggling just to like you know not sin with finances where

884
01:07:16,320 --> 01:07:21,080
you know like I want to entrust you with more yeah like money is the least of these things

885
01:07:21,080 --> 01:07:25,340
right Jesus talked about like this is the least yeah you know money and what you do

886
01:07:25,340 --> 01:07:28,920
with it is like the least and I want to give you the whole point of money is so that I

887
01:07:28,920 --> 01:07:35,480
can change kingdoms yeah so I can make ambassadors to change culture to change the world to have

888
01:07:35,480 --> 01:07:41,120
influence and so finances for us has been another passion of stewardship and just wanting

889
01:07:41,120 --> 01:07:44,640
to be that in you know because we went to school of ministry right we went to school

890
01:07:44,640 --> 01:07:51,880
and then it was being faithful in a little yeah coming in at like 530 6 o'clock to clean

891
01:07:51,880 --> 01:07:57,060
the school yeah before certain before the school would take place and somebody saw our

892
01:07:57,060 --> 01:08:00,800
faithfulness and said hey here's here's some clients that I want to give you because I'm

893
01:08:00,800 --> 01:08:04,880
moving and that's how it all began right it was faithful yeah it was faithfulness it was

894
01:08:04,880 --> 01:08:08,520
just stewardship it was just running after God yeah and then the blessings just begin

895
01:08:08,520 --> 01:08:13,480
to overtake you right so when you're pursuing God like all of those things are going to

896
01:08:13,480 --> 01:08:17,400
just begin to pursue you and when one of your spouses is attacked in your health the other

897
01:08:17,400 --> 01:08:25,200
one is yes ma'am yeah yes ma'am and and what and that is that is why health is so important

898
01:08:25,200 --> 01:08:30,720
that's where the enemy what you said that hole in that armor if you know I've even recently

899
01:08:30,720 --> 01:08:36,760
I've gone through my own battle in an apartment and hunter sell to two you know and because

900
01:08:36,760 --> 01:08:44,320
we're one flush yes ma'am yes ma'am and so that's just to hit on that that health finances

901
01:08:44,320 --> 01:08:51,280
is like the two things I want to become hunter I say this on podcast I'm hunter and I want

902
01:08:51,280 --> 01:08:58,920
to be able to never ask money permission to do anything that God wants us to do I love

903
01:08:58,920 --> 01:09:07,280
that yes amen amen that's the body of Christ like every single amen no one no marriage

904
01:09:07,280 --> 01:09:13,120
in our body is a debt amen what could we do how much less sickness would be on our body

905
01:09:13,120 --> 01:09:23,640
how much less heaviness bondage yes depression yes like no debt yeah that's powerful man

906
01:09:23,640 --> 01:09:35,080
I love that yeah I love that so anyway it's really good yeah so any final thoughts thank

907
01:09:35,080 --> 01:09:44,200
you thank you thank you are my I am this is the very first time I've ever been on a podcast

908
01:09:44,200 --> 01:09:51,560
so cool 20 years from now I'll say my very first podcast and you were on the 100th episode

909
01:09:51,560 --> 01:09:58,640
yes that's a big deal that's a big deal thank you thank you both so much it's fun to be

910
01:09:58,640 --> 01:10:05,180
able to just have that time to be able to just express for me like even being able even

911
01:10:05,180 --> 01:10:08,880
as I've spoke tonight or as I've heard other people spoke it's like I can hear God yeah

912
01:10:08,880 --> 01:10:13,940
you know that's why for me I like to be able to talk about the things of God with people

913
01:10:13,940 --> 01:10:18,280
that love Jesus because even as we're talking like oh that's really good oh lord that's

914
01:10:18,280 --> 01:10:24,400
really good oh that you know yeah it's just a fun space so thank you so much thank you

915
01:10:24,400 --> 01:10:29,280
thank you guys yeah you don't have anything else on that paper well I mean we could keep

916
01:10:29,280 --> 01:10:35,000
going but I was gonna say do you have one final thought because here's the deal hunter

917
01:10:35,000 --> 01:10:40,080
we don't hear a lot from you but I know we do you when all we do there there is such

918
01:10:40,080 --> 01:10:44,960
goodness that rolls out of you brother like sincerely and you're a treasure and so when

919
01:10:44,960 --> 01:10:50,640
you speak we listen so if there's any anything that you could speak out into the airways

920
01:10:50,640 --> 01:10:58,840
break off some stuff or just speak some goodness yeah yeah well I'm gonna kind of declare just

921
01:10:58,840 --> 01:11:02,920
over our I can kind of declare of our marriage and just over the marriages in our body I

922
01:11:02,920 --> 01:11:08,480
mean I want to see you know I want to see goodness and fullness you know I think that's

923
01:11:08,480 --> 01:11:14,720
what Christ died to give us yeah was that fullness back and the fullness of it in the

924
01:11:14,720 --> 01:11:20,280
reality of who he was right and the fullness of relationship with each other as human beings

925
01:11:20,280 --> 01:11:24,480
in in particular obviously we're talking about the covenant between a man and woman and our

926
01:11:24,480 --> 01:11:31,080
spouses and so I think I think that's what he really wants to encompass and is a fullness

927
01:11:31,080 --> 01:11:37,240
you know fullness to where we're being intentional you know and we're encompassing him into every

928
01:11:37,240 --> 01:11:42,640
area of our lives obviously and it's that fullness of that joy you know I want that

929
01:11:42,640 --> 01:11:49,760
joy to really break heavy yolks heavy chains you know and I think that begins when you

930
01:11:49,760 --> 01:11:54,760
have two people that are running after him and you allow each other like we've talked

931
01:11:54,760 --> 01:12:01,080
about tonight to really function in their giftings right you allow them to to function

932
01:12:01,080 --> 01:12:06,120
to be able to lift them up you know I think that's another thing that I really enjoy about

933
01:12:06,120 --> 01:12:13,760
our marriages we try to lift each other up yes oh man like I've really enjoyed she's

934
01:12:13,760 --> 01:12:17,680
had opportunities now and different things that she's getting used for and I love that

935
01:12:17,680 --> 01:12:22,320
you know I love being able to have her be lifted up you know into who she's called to

936
01:12:22,320 --> 01:12:27,400
be and I think if we can capture that heart the heart of the father that wants people

937
01:12:27,400 --> 01:12:32,560
and wants your spouse to reach their full potential yes you know I think that's when

938
01:12:32,560 --> 01:12:38,920
you're going to really have a lot of healthy fruit in relationships because you know you're

939
01:12:38,920 --> 01:12:44,480
not centered on yourself yes you know there's just so much so much swirling in the air waves

940
01:12:44,480 --> 01:12:51,720
about self self self self and when you can just discard all that when you can set all

941
01:12:51,720 --> 01:12:55,920
that by the wayside and say how can I help my spouse you know how can I elevate them

942
01:12:55,920 --> 01:13:00,760
to be all that they're called to be in Christ and allow them to bear the fruit for the king

943
01:13:00,760 --> 01:13:06,360
I think that's a very beautiful picture and that's that's my hope for everybody out there

944
01:13:06,360 --> 01:13:11,000
that we can get to that place to where we're serving each other we're wanting the best

945
01:13:11,000 --> 01:13:16,600
for your spouse and we're reaching into that depth you know that well that we talked about

946
01:13:16,600 --> 01:13:22,960
in God and then we're allowing him to pour out I love that can we have you guys back

947
01:13:22,960 --> 01:13:33,680
sometime yes yes she adores you man she's been half teary all over the entire episode

948
01:13:33,680 --> 01:13:43,560
baby I got Kleenex right there strategically put tissue in spaces yes we love you guys

949
01:13:43,560 --> 01:13:48,460
we honor you guys and we appreciate you all thanks for bringing some stuff to the table

950
01:13:48,460 --> 01:13:54,600
and not being scared to talk about it yes yeah don't we appreciate that you are friends

951
01:13:54,600 --> 01:14:01,000
that have no problem bringing what's in the dark to the light you guys aren't scared yeah

952
01:14:01,000 --> 01:14:07,960
and and we're here for it yeah let's start healing some marriages yeah yes I love it

953
01:14:07,960 --> 01:14:26,360
I love it all right guys have the best week enjoy the journey