1 00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:13,200 Hello and welcome to another episode of Upfront and Undivided with Luke and Dean'na. 2 00:00:13,200 --> 00:00:14,200 Hi babe. 3 00:00:14,200 --> 00:00:15,200 Hey babe. 4 00:00:15,200 --> 00:00:16,200 How's it going? 5 00:00:16,200 --> 00:00:17,200 It's good. 6 00:00:17,200 --> 00:00:18,200 How are you? 7 00:00:18,200 --> 00:00:19,200 I'm good. 8 00:00:19,200 --> 00:00:20,200 We got people in here with us. 9 00:00:20,200 --> 00:00:21,200 We do have people in with us. 10 00:00:21,200 --> 00:00:22,200 It's sketchy. 11 00:00:22,200 --> 00:00:23,200 We got sketchy people in here with us. 12 00:00:23,200 --> 00:00:24,200 It is what it is. 13 00:00:24,200 --> 00:00:27,040 You know, no they're good people. 14 00:00:27,040 --> 00:00:28,040 We like these people. 15 00:00:28,040 --> 00:00:29,040 Yes. 16 00:00:29,040 --> 00:00:30,480 We would be happy to have people in here with us if we didn't like these people. 17 00:00:30,480 --> 00:00:31,560 That is very true. 18 00:00:31,560 --> 00:00:34,440 We've got John and Tracy Flager. 19 00:00:34,440 --> 00:00:35,440 Yes. 20 00:00:35,440 --> 00:00:36,440 Hey. 21 00:00:36,440 --> 00:00:37,440 Hi y'all. 22 00:00:37,440 --> 00:00:38,440 Hey. 23 00:00:38,440 --> 00:00:40,440 Y'all are welcome to say hello now. 24 00:00:40,440 --> 00:00:41,440 Yeah. 25 00:00:41,440 --> 00:00:42,440 We can talk now. 26 00:00:42,440 --> 00:00:43,440 You may speak freely. 27 00:00:43,440 --> 00:00:44,440 Good to. 28 00:00:44,440 --> 00:00:45,440 It is. 29 00:00:45,440 --> 00:00:46,440 It's hard, isn't it? 30 00:00:46,440 --> 00:00:47,440 Because it's like you don't hear the music. 31 00:00:47,440 --> 00:00:48,440 You don't hear anything on. 32 00:00:48,440 --> 00:00:49,440 Listen. 33 00:00:49,440 --> 00:00:50,440 You're like, yeah, are we talking now? 34 00:00:50,440 --> 00:00:51,440 What are we doing? 35 00:00:51,440 --> 00:00:52,440 Yeah, now we get it. 36 00:00:52,440 --> 00:00:53,440 How are you guys? 37 00:00:53,440 --> 00:00:54,440 We're good. 38 00:00:54,440 --> 00:00:55,440 We're good. 39 00:00:55,440 --> 00:00:56,440 Yeah. 40 00:00:56,440 --> 00:00:57,440 Busy but good. 41 00:00:57,440 --> 00:00:58,440 Busy but good. 42 00:00:58,440 --> 00:01:03,040 So, do you want to do a little introduction of our sweet friends? 43 00:01:03,040 --> 00:01:04,040 Yeah. 44 00:01:04,040 --> 00:01:05,960 So, I mean, y'all are married. 45 00:01:05,960 --> 00:01:08,200 Y'all are parents. 46 00:01:08,200 --> 00:01:10,440 You've both been in ministry. 47 00:01:10,440 --> 00:01:14,880 You've both worked out of ministry and in ministry. 48 00:01:14,880 --> 00:01:21,960 You know, I'm still, there's part of me that still like wraps my head around the like, your 49 00:01:21,960 --> 00:01:24,960 pastors but also your working. 50 00:01:24,960 --> 00:01:28,960 I mean, I know you're not pastors right now but I know in the past you guys have done 51 00:01:28,960 --> 00:01:29,960 a lot of. 52 00:01:29,960 --> 00:01:31,840 You guys have had a lot of. 53 00:01:31,840 --> 00:01:36,400 You guys have had your hands on a lot of stuff and you put on different shoes and different 54 00:01:36,400 --> 00:01:38,160 hats all at the same time. 55 00:01:38,160 --> 00:01:39,400 And they become our friends. 56 00:01:39,400 --> 00:01:40,960 They are our dear, dear friends. 57 00:01:40,960 --> 00:01:41,960 Yeah. 58 00:01:41,960 --> 00:01:45,040 They come and live with us on the weekends periodically just to kind of hang out and 59 00:01:45,040 --> 00:01:48,400 do stuff and be, which that in itself has been kind of fun. 60 00:01:48,400 --> 00:01:51,760 So, it's like, because we didn't know y'all from anybody. 61 00:01:51,760 --> 00:01:57,120 Hey, do you have a space for this family to come because you guys literally drive an hour 62 00:01:57,120 --> 00:02:02,280 to get to church just to be in the presence of God and to be with people. 63 00:02:02,280 --> 00:02:06,800 And it's like, and you guys literally will put the money in to do the things to go to 64 00:02:06,800 --> 00:02:09,320 places but it's like, we've got a spare space. 65 00:02:09,320 --> 00:02:12,720 Y'all come in with your beautiful teenage daughter, teenage daughter. 66 00:02:12,720 --> 00:02:14,720 Now she's a teenager. 67 00:02:14,720 --> 00:02:15,720 Jesus. 68 00:02:15,720 --> 00:02:19,480 I think that's actually what got you and I talking because you're like looking at me 69 00:02:19,480 --> 00:02:21,480 going, tell me things. 70 00:02:21,480 --> 00:02:23,600 This is new territory. 71 00:02:23,600 --> 00:02:28,920 I have no idea what is coming with teenage years. 72 00:02:28,920 --> 00:02:30,800 I know what it was like when I was a teenager. 73 00:02:30,800 --> 00:02:31,800 Yeah. 74 00:02:31,800 --> 00:02:34,880 But I don't know what it was like to raise a teenager. 75 00:02:34,880 --> 00:02:35,880 Completely different. 76 00:02:35,880 --> 00:02:37,720 Completely different situation. 77 00:02:37,720 --> 00:02:42,160 And then we had John, you had John on the Equipped Man on your last, was it your last 78 00:02:42,160 --> 00:02:43,160 interview? 79 00:02:43,160 --> 00:02:44,160 Yeah. 80 00:02:44,160 --> 00:02:45,160 My last episode. 81 00:02:45,160 --> 00:02:46,160 That was powerful. 82 00:02:46,160 --> 00:02:47,160 That was really, really good. 83 00:02:47,160 --> 00:02:48,160 You guys had a good. 84 00:02:48,160 --> 00:02:49,160 It was an honor. 85 00:02:49,160 --> 00:02:51,080 So, Tracy is the better half of John. 86 00:02:51,080 --> 00:02:52,080 Yes. 87 00:02:52,080 --> 00:02:53,080 I appreciate that. 88 00:02:53,080 --> 00:02:54,080 And you guys just. 89 00:02:54,080 --> 00:02:55,080 She's the more polished version. 90 00:02:55,080 --> 00:02:56,080 She, you know, she's pretty. 91 00:02:56,080 --> 00:02:57,080 It helps that she's pretty. 92 00:02:57,080 --> 00:02:58,080 Sorry, John. 93 00:02:58,080 --> 00:02:59,080 Just fine. 94 00:02:59,080 --> 00:03:00,080 It's good, man. 95 00:03:00,080 --> 00:03:01,080 It's fine. 96 00:03:01,080 --> 00:03:04,080 Glad to know she's pretty. 97 00:03:04,080 --> 00:03:06,440 But you guys just celebrated an anniversary. 98 00:03:06,440 --> 00:03:07,440 What number? 99 00:03:07,440 --> 00:03:08,440 18. 100 00:03:08,440 --> 00:03:09,440 Congratulations. 101 00:03:09,440 --> 00:03:10,440 We've been together. 102 00:03:10,440 --> 00:03:15,240 We've been married 18 together, 20 in November. 103 00:03:15,240 --> 00:03:17,240 So not long enough. 104 00:03:17,240 --> 00:03:18,240 He says not long enough. 105 00:03:18,240 --> 00:03:19,240 Aw. 106 00:03:19,240 --> 00:03:20,240 He was. 107 00:03:20,240 --> 00:03:21,240 I like that answer. 108 00:03:21,240 --> 00:03:22,240 Yeah. 109 00:03:22,240 --> 00:03:26,520 He was taught a long ago, long ago by a pastor mentor that, you know, when someone asks you 110 00:03:26,520 --> 00:03:29,640 how long you've been married, you just say not long enough. 111 00:03:29,640 --> 00:03:30,640 Yeah. 112 00:03:30,640 --> 00:03:31,640 I like that. 113 00:03:31,640 --> 00:03:32,640 I like that. 114 00:03:32,640 --> 00:03:33,640 You keep you out of trouble. 115 00:03:33,640 --> 00:03:34,880 Well, it keeps you out of trouble. 116 00:03:34,880 --> 00:03:39,160 But all of a sudden I was thinking, but it also, it reminds you that you still have space 117 00:03:39,160 --> 00:03:40,160 to grow. 118 00:03:40,160 --> 00:03:41,160 Exactly. 119 00:03:41,160 --> 00:03:45,600 And you get to, you get to continue to explore and discover and rediscover and all of the 120 00:03:45,600 --> 00:03:46,840 things with this person. 121 00:03:46,840 --> 00:03:47,840 Absolutely. 122 00:03:47,840 --> 00:03:48,840 I love that. 123 00:03:48,840 --> 00:03:49,840 Aw. 124 00:03:49,840 --> 00:03:50,840 That's sweet. 125 00:03:50,840 --> 00:03:51,840 That's sweet. 126 00:03:51,840 --> 00:03:53,920 Well, we have, we have a topic. 127 00:03:53,920 --> 00:03:54,920 What's your topic? 128 00:03:54,920 --> 00:03:56,080 What are you wanting to talk about? 129 00:03:56,080 --> 00:03:58,240 Why did we bring this amazing couple? 130 00:03:58,240 --> 00:04:03,440 I mean, part of it was because John came up to me last weekend and say, Hey, we want to 131 00:04:03,440 --> 00:04:04,440 talk on your podcast. 132 00:04:04,440 --> 00:04:05,960 So this is your fault, John. 133 00:04:05,960 --> 00:04:07,080 It is John's fault. 134 00:04:07,080 --> 00:04:08,080 So great. 135 00:04:08,080 --> 00:04:13,040 But we want, you know, again, we want to talk about, I know one of the things I wanted to 136 00:04:13,040 --> 00:04:18,240 talk about when we were discussing whether or not, yes, do we want to want them on our 137 00:04:18,240 --> 00:04:24,400 podcast because, you know, sometimes we'll be picky because we don't want anybody. 138 00:04:24,400 --> 00:04:28,640 Because we believe you guys bring a weightiness with you. 139 00:04:28,640 --> 00:04:36,280 And we kind of wanted to talk about some of the things that you've gone through in ministry 140 00:04:36,280 --> 00:04:38,280 as a couple. 141 00:04:38,280 --> 00:04:43,560 And you know, I know, I know on In the Real, they had an episode where they talked about 142 00:04:43,560 --> 00:04:45,440 church hurt. 143 00:04:45,440 --> 00:04:49,280 And I kind of wanted to part of part of our conversation was I kind of wanted to talk 144 00:04:49,280 --> 00:04:51,320 to you guys about that. 145 00:04:51,320 --> 00:04:59,960 And how do you come out still strong, still together, still loving God after the flames 146 00:04:59,960 --> 00:05:01,440 that you guys have walked through? 147 00:05:01,440 --> 00:05:03,760 Well, it's a very good question. 148 00:05:03,760 --> 00:05:10,360 I think first off, you need to understand that church in itself is going to hurt you 149 00:05:10,360 --> 00:05:12,820 because church in itself is just a building. 150 00:05:12,820 --> 00:05:18,000 It's just a bunch of people to make up a body and in that body, there's people that are 151 00:05:18,000 --> 00:05:22,760 not always going to have the same focus nor the same perspective of love and compassion 152 00:05:22,760 --> 00:05:26,120 as you have or as myself. 153 00:05:26,120 --> 00:05:30,560 But in the same concept of that, you have to understand that, you know, we are taught 154 00:05:30,560 --> 00:05:36,920 to be an example, be an example of those that have gone before us. 155 00:05:36,920 --> 00:05:40,560 You know, the disciples, all those that have suffered and, you know, went through great 156 00:05:40,560 --> 00:05:41,560 things. 157 00:05:41,560 --> 00:05:45,400 And, you know, we found that God wasn't the one hurting us. 158 00:05:45,400 --> 00:05:47,960 It wasn't, you know, he wasn't bringing it. 159 00:05:47,960 --> 00:05:50,640 It wasn't like it was an attack or anything like that. 160 00:05:50,640 --> 00:06:00,240 But just misconception, you know, misunderstanding is as I've often I make light of it now, you 161 00:06:00,240 --> 00:06:02,840 know, people not wanting the truth necessarily. 162 00:06:02,840 --> 00:06:03,840 Yeah. 163 00:06:03,840 --> 00:06:06,200 Can you just make me feel good? 164 00:06:06,200 --> 00:06:12,880 But we've always come out on top just basically because we made it up in our minds or, you 165 00:06:12,880 --> 00:06:16,960 know, certainly and I've maybe I've taught this in my family more than anything is, you 166 00:06:16,960 --> 00:06:20,840 know, we're not going to be what everybody else wants us to be. 167 00:06:20,840 --> 00:06:21,840 Yeah. 168 00:06:21,840 --> 00:06:26,680 What the Bible's called us to be and be who God's laid out for us. 169 00:06:26,680 --> 00:06:27,680 Yeah. 170 00:06:27,680 --> 00:06:31,120 And sometimes that means you're going to walk in with tears and walk with those that are 171 00:06:31,120 --> 00:06:34,680 your enemies just as often as not. 172 00:06:34,680 --> 00:06:40,280 But so yeah, it's it's tough church church church is definitely a real thing. 173 00:06:40,280 --> 00:06:43,620 And I think it's across the board. 174 00:06:43,620 --> 00:06:46,160 Everybody is experiencing it in some way or some fashion. 175 00:06:46,160 --> 00:06:47,160 Yeah. 176 00:06:47,160 --> 00:06:55,760 And a lot of times, too, when you do get hurt by church members or church in general, a 177 00:06:55,760 --> 00:06:59,740 lot of times you have to dig deeper and look at the bigger picture and what hurt are they 178 00:06:59,740 --> 00:07:01,080 going through? 179 00:07:01,080 --> 00:07:06,560 You know, obviously, they're coming from a place where they have possibly been hurt. 180 00:07:06,560 --> 00:07:14,200 And so they don't know how to respond to it or they don't know how to try to come the 181 00:07:14,200 --> 00:07:16,960 word come up with the word that I'm wanting. 182 00:07:16,960 --> 00:07:22,600 Deal with it or, you know, find a way to get through their own hurt. 183 00:07:22,600 --> 00:07:23,600 Yeah. 184 00:07:23,600 --> 00:07:29,440 So the only way that they know how to express their hurt is unfortunately, unintentionally 185 00:07:29,440 --> 00:07:36,000 or even intentionally hurting someone else, because maybe they want to feel they want 186 00:07:36,000 --> 00:07:38,360 you to feel what they're feeling. 187 00:07:38,360 --> 00:07:39,360 Yeah. 188 00:07:39,360 --> 00:07:44,100 And, you know, so a lot of times I've had to learn the hard way that, you know, it could 189 00:07:44,100 --> 00:07:49,520 be just that they're hurting and they don't know how to get over the hurt. 190 00:07:49,520 --> 00:07:50,520 Yeah. 191 00:07:50,520 --> 00:07:51,520 It's like they don't know how to process. 192 00:07:51,520 --> 00:07:52,520 Yeah. 193 00:07:52,520 --> 00:07:53,520 That's the word I was looking for. 194 00:07:53,520 --> 00:07:54,520 Process. 195 00:07:54,520 --> 00:07:55,520 Yeah. 196 00:07:55,520 --> 00:07:56,520 Yeah. 197 00:07:56,520 --> 00:07:57,520 And it is. 198 00:07:57,520 --> 00:08:01,920 I feel and I don't know quite how to handle it and process it and express it. 199 00:08:01,920 --> 00:08:05,040 So it's like, I'm going to now project it on you. 200 00:08:05,040 --> 00:08:06,040 Yeah. 201 00:08:06,040 --> 00:08:11,280 So well, immediately what came to my mind when you were saying it was it almost becomes 202 00:08:11,280 --> 00:08:13,280 their identity, right? 203 00:08:13,280 --> 00:08:15,160 The hurt becomes your identity. 204 00:08:15,160 --> 00:08:20,320 And when you don't know who you are and whose you are, or when you lose sight of that perspective 205 00:08:20,320 --> 00:08:28,040 of your life, of ultimately the one that is in charge, then that the offense or the bitter 206 00:08:28,040 --> 00:08:32,560 root or the stuff that starts becoming the identity. 207 00:08:32,560 --> 00:08:38,200 And you start taking that on as opposed to what does God want to do? 208 00:08:38,200 --> 00:08:44,140 Or how does this, you know, kind of feeding, feeding that wound as opposed to asking God 209 00:08:44,140 --> 00:08:49,200 to completely expose it, clean it out, which that hurts, right? 210 00:08:49,200 --> 00:08:53,080 Like that in itself, that can be a process, but allowing him to come into that space with 211 00:08:53,080 --> 00:08:55,120 you and say, OK, I need you. 212 00:08:55,120 --> 00:08:56,240 Let's let's heal this. 213 00:08:56,240 --> 00:08:57,240 Let's fix this. 214 00:08:57,240 --> 00:09:03,120 But yeah, I can see where that that's gross. 215 00:09:03,120 --> 00:09:04,120 It's hurt. 216 00:09:04,120 --> 00:09:05,120 That's hard. 217 00:09:05,120 --> 00:09:06,120 It's heartbreaking. 218 00:09:06,120 --> 00:09:07,120 It is, to be honest. 219 00:09:07,120 --> 00:09:08,120 It's heartbreaking. 220 00:09:08,120 --> 00:09:16,800 And, you know, things that to get to help me with that is I've surrounded myself with 221 00:09:16,800 --> 00:09:25,240 individuals like you, Dina and Luke that I can come to with no judgment. 222 00:09:25,240 --> 00:09:29,680 And you know, if I need to be whipped back in shape, you're going to whip me back in 223 00:09:29,680 --> 00:09:35,040 shape and say lovingly, lovingly say, girl, get over it. 224 00:09:35,040 --> 00:09:36,040 Yeah. 225 00:09:36,040 --> 00:09:37,040 Now, what are we going to do? 226 00:09:37,040 --> 00:09:38,040 Yeah. 227 00:09:38,040 --> 00:09:41,560 And, you know, I feel that with church hurt a lot of times, you just got to find the right 228 00:09:41,560 --> 00:09:43,280 people to surround yourself with. 229 00:09:43,280 --> 00:09:44,280 Yeah. 230 00:09:44,280 --> 00:09:45,280 To help with that. 231 00:09:45,280 --> 00:09:46,280 It is. 232 00:09:46,280 --> 00:09:49,960 And if you want to surround yourself with people that acknowledge, OK, yeah, man, I'm 233 00:09:49,960 --> 00:09:50,960 sorry. 234 00:09:50,960 --> 00:09:57,320 I've learned that forgiveness saying I'm sorry is huge in the kingdom of God. 235 00:09:57,320 --> 00:10:02,380 And it doesn't seem to be something that unfortunately doesn't get it doesn't get said as often as 236 00:10:02,380 --> 00:10:04,840 you would think it needs to. 237 00:10:04,840 --> 00:10:08,680 I'd say it's with that, though, I think it's bigger than the church. 238 00:10:08,680 --> 00:10:09,680 I agree. 239 00:10:09,680 --> 00:10:14,760 Because I mean, as much as that's become culture, it is it is culture because, you know, they 240 00:10:14,760 --> 00:10:22,240 say like two of the things that are hardest for people to say is I'm sorry and I was wrong. 241 00:10:22,240 --> 00:10:27,480 You know, and even though how many how many times, John, you've got the Bible memorized 242 00:10:27,480 --> 00:10:28,480 more than I. 243 00:10:28,480 --> 00:10:30,480 How many times does the Bible talk about forgiveness? 244 00:10:30,480 --> 00:10:33,600 Well, a lot. 245 00:10:33,600 --> 00:10:35,440 You know, and yes, 70 times seven. 246 00:10:35,440 --> 00:10:37,480 So you're never getting past it. 247 00:10:37,480 --> 00:10:38,480 Right. 248 00:10:38,480 --> 00:10:43,720 You know, and yet that's that is as as people as humans as flawed beings. 249 00:10:43,720 --> 00:10:44,720 Yeah. 250 00:10:44,720 --> 00:10:47,120 And that's that is one of the hardest things that we could say. 251 00:10:47,120 --> 00:10:49,400 Yeah, I agree. 252 00:10:49,400 --> 00:10:50,400 Yeah. 253 00:10:50,400 --> 00:10:53,080 So you, Luke, we're starting to talk. 254 00:10:53,080 --> 00:10:56,360 And this is one of the things that really got us talking today. 255 00:10:56,360 --> 00:11:00,560 And you were talking about the arsenal of God. 256 00:11:00,560 --> 00:11:04,760 And I know that probably some of our listeners are going to be like, OK, guys, what does 257 00:11:04,760 --> 00:11:05,760 this have to do with anything? 258 00:11:05,760 --> 00:11:09,400 And it's like this kind of has everything to do with everything. 259 00:11:09,400 --> 00:11:13,160 Right now, what we're seeing, we believe what we're seeing. 260 00:11:13,160 --> 00:11:22,000 You and I personally and just kind of corporately around us is there seems to be such an onslaught 261 00:11:22,000 --> 00:11:28,200 and you guys could probably testify on marriages and the family unit. 262 00:11:28,200 --> 00:11:33,560 And well, first off, let me let's back up and let me explain. 263 00:11:33,560 --> 00:11:34,560 Yeah. 264 00:11:34,560 --> 00:11:40,440 Kind of my theory of or my vision rather of the arsenal is and this this hit me years 265 00:11:40,440 --> 00:11:46,440 ago when I was talking to a Christian and it's like, you know, God has empowered us 266 00:11:46,440 --> 00:11:50,520 to have full access to his arsenal. 267 00:11:50,520 --> 00:11:56,760 And it's like in my mind, again, as military warrior minded, it's like first couple rows, 268 00:11:56,760 --> 00:12:00,680 you step in and there's like the sticks, there's the slings. 269 00:12:00,680 --> 00:12:05,000 And then the further back you go, the weapons just get more and more powerful, you know, 270 00:12:05,000 --> 00:12:08,360 and at the back is like the nukes and better. 271 00:12:08,360 --> 00:12:13,040 And it's like, I feel like there are so many Christians, they step into the first couple 272 00:12:13,040 --> 00:12:17,880 rows and it's like, well, this was good enough for David or it's a weapon of God, so therefore 273 00:12:17,880 --> 00:12:18,880 it's good enough. 274 00:12:18,880 --> 00:12:19,880 Right. 275 00:12:19,880 --> 00:12:28,000 And then it's like today I had the realization of the enemy has it has the same amount in 276 00:12:28,000 --> 00:12:31,200 his arsenal that God has in his. 277 00:12:31,200 --> 00:12:36,400 And it's like, you know, if he's using all these tools, all these weapons, and he's not 278 00:12:36,400 --> 00:12:43,120 holding back and he's, you know, and again, how many times does the Bible say weapons 279 00:12:43,120 --> 00:12:44,120 formed against us? 280 00:12:44,120 --> 00:12:45,280 The enemy is coming. 281 00:12:45,280 --> 00:12:46,680 The enemy is prowling. 282 00:12:46,680 --> 00:12:47,680 Here's what's going to happen. 283 00:12:47,680 --> 00:12:49,520 You know, God's like details. 284 00:12:49,520 --> 00:12:51,080 The enemy will come at you. 285 00:12:51,080 --> 00:12:55,840 Yeah, I think a big thing and I don't want to jump in, but I think we need to understand 286 00:12:55,840 --> 00:12:59,000 that, you know, people think, well, this is some physical thing. 287 00:12:59,000 --> 00:13:01,800 This is like some flaming arrow is going to pop my tire. 288 00:13:01,800 --> 00:13:07,240 You know, the enemy is coming with the word, but he's coming with the word twisted. 289 00:13:07,240 --> 00:13:10,200 Yes, coming with the word deformed. 290 00:13:10,200 --> 00:13:15,080 He's coming with the same scriptures that are being preached, but he's bringing that 291 00:13:15,080 --> 00:13:20,440 weapon that God's given to you to take an authority and control of the situation. 292 00:13:20,440 --> 00:13:26,440 And he's bringing it just twisted just enough, just enough so you can get off course. 293 00:13:26,440 --> 00:13:29,460 You can end up here in left field somewhere. 294 00:13:29,460 --> 00:13:30,460 And that's the thing. 295 00:13:30,460 --> 00:13:32,520 So he's going to come with something that's recognizable. 296 00:13:32,520 --> 00:13:33,920 It's going to be big. 297 00:13:33,920 --> 00:13:34,920 Oh, yeah. 298 00:13:34,920 --> 00:13:35,920 Oh, yeah. 299 00:13:35,920 --> 00:13:39,080 I'm going to I'm going to recognize him because he's going to be this three headed cyclops 300 00:13:39,080 --> 00:13:42,600 and I'm going to know exactly who he is going to be a semi driving through my house. 301 00:13:42,600 --> 00:13:43,600 Yeah, exactly. 302 00:13:43,600 --> 00:13:46,520 No, he's he's coming as your TV preacher. 303 00:13:46,520 --> 00:13:51,160 He's coming as your pastor that's saying it's OK now to to have multiple wives. 304 00:13:51,160 --> 00:13:53,700 He's coming as that man that's saying it's OK to live in sin. 305 00:13:53,700 --> 00:13:57,200 He's coming as that woman that's demon that it's all right to be an adulterer. 306 00:13:57,200 --> 00:13:58,200 He's coming. 307 00:13:58,200 --> 00:13:59,200 Yeah. 308 00:13:59,200 --> 00:14:01,440 He's coming as a word and he's saying it's OK. 309 00:14:01,440 --> 00:14:02,440 Right. 310 00:14:02,440 --> 00:14:06,880 And he's he's coming as that that that other still small voice, that intrusive thought 311 00:14:06,880 --> 00:14:12,040 that says, did God really say, yeah, are you sure that's in the Bible? 312 00:14:12,040 --> 00:14:13,040 Yeah. 313 00:14:13,040 --> 00:14:17,800 Just enough to trip you up and put that hook of you questioning your loyalty. 314 00:14:17,800 --> 00:14:18,800 Right. 315 00:14:18,800 --> 00:14:20,160 And that's enough to trip us. 316 00:14:20,160 --> 00:14:25,200 Or if something happens and you get that church hurt or you get hurt in general, not just 317 00:14:25,200 --> 00:14:31,040 the church, but something in your life, which I can personally and I'm in that season where 318 00:14:31,040 --> 00:14:33,240 I've faced rejection. 319 00:14:33,240 --> 00:14:34,240 Yeah. 320 00:14:34,240 --> 00:14:36,640 It's like, see, you're not good enough. 321 00:14:36,640 --> 00:14:39,280 See, that thought was right. 322 00:14:39,280 --> 00:14:41,980 See, see, why are you doing this? 323 00:14:41,980 --> 00:14:43,920 You don't know what you're doing. 324 00:14:43,920 --> 00:14:44,920 Right. 325 00:14:44,920 --> 00:14:47,200 That still small voice can be anything. 326 00:14:47,200 --> 00:14:50,560 See, they treated you like that. 327 00:14:50,560 --> 00:14:52,760 See, God's not really all good. 328 00:14:52,760 --> 00:14:53,760 Yeah. 329 00:14:53,760 --> 00:14:56,400 Just yucky, just yucky. 330 00:14:56,400 --> 00:14:57,400 Yeah. 331 00:14:57,400 --> 00:15:02,800 But I know that one of the things that on on top of the arsenal that you are talking 332 00:15:02,800 --> 00:15:12,640 about that years ago when I had seen that kind of that vision as far as when you are 333 00:15:12,640 --> 00:15:18,520 at peace and you're really good at saying this, that it's better to be a warrior in 334 00:15:18,520 --> 00:15:19,520 a garden. 335 00:15:19,520 --> 00:15:20,520 Yes. 336 00:15:20,520 --> 00:15:26,080 Or in a middle level war and we're talking about the weapons of our warfare. 337 00:15:26,080 --> 00:15:34,720 We're talking about being ready in season and out of season and that right now it seems 338 00:15:34,720 --> 00:15:41,520 like as much it's really bizarre to me because it seems like as much as all hell seems to 339 00:15:41,520 --> 00:15:45,400 be breaking loose in our nation with all of the things. 340 00:15:45,400 --> 00:15:46,400 Nations. 341 00:15:46,400 --> 00:15:47,400 Nations. 342 00:15:47,400 --> 00:15:48,400 Yes. 343 00:15:48,400 --> 00:15:49,400 Yes, sir. 344 00:15:49,400 --> 00:15:50,400 Nations. 345 00:15:50,400 --> 00:15:51,400 And it just feels like this. 346 00:15:51,400 --> 00:15:54,640 It feels like there's just like a lull. 347 00:15:54,640 --> 00:16:00,480 And what I'm seeing is the men of God and I'm not just going to put this on you guys. 348 00:16:00,480 --> 00:16:01,480 Please understand. 349 00:16:01,480 --> 00:16:07,720 And you already know that it's not a but it's like the enemy is creating this thing inside 350 00:16:07,720 --> 00:16:11,320 that says, oh, we're just going to we'll just back up a little bit. 351 00:16:11,320 --> 00:16:12,800 It's going to be okay. 352 00:16:12,800 --> 00:16:19,280 And then what happens eventually is because you're not fighting that focus or you're not 353 00:16:19,280 --> 00:16:24,600 sharpening that sword while you're waiting, then all of a sudden the enemy comes in. 354 00:16:24,600 --> 00:16:31,640 Like you said, John, as far as like he's going to bring, you know, you got the pornography, 355 00:16:31,640 --> 00:16:35,360 you got extramarital affairs, you've got your children going crazy. 356 00:16:35,360 --> 00:16:36,960 You've got all of this stuff that's happening. 357 00:16:36,960 --> 00:16:37,960 Right. 358 00:16:37,960 --> 00:16:43,280 And then it's like the people of God, the moms, the dads, the families, we're not standing 359 00:16:43,280 --> 00:16:44,920 up into our position. 360 00:16:44,920 --> 00:16:47,680 We're not grabbing hold of the weapons that you keep talking about, Luke. 361 00:16:47,680 --> 00:16:49,920 Like we're not pulling down the strongholds. 362 00:16:49,920 --> 00:16:51,480 We're not constantly in prayer. 363 00:16:51,480 --> 00:16:55,640 Tracy, you had actually were talking about just some of the weapons, just praise and 364 00:16:55,640 --> 00:16:57,200 worship and prayer. 365 00:16:57,200 --> 00:16:58,200 Yeah. 366 00:16:58,200 --> 00:17:00,160 Like, what is going on? 367 00:17:00,160 --> 00:17:02,600 Like give us some practical applications. 368 00:17:02,600 --> 00:17:07,520 Like when you are in a scenario, just even as a pastor's things that you might have even 369 00:17:07,520 --> 00:17:13,040 have seen that you can say, if you just do a couple of these things, it will keep you 370 00:17:13,040 --> 00:17:14,960 from kind of tripping up. 371 00:17:14,960 --> 00:17:18,000 What would be some things that you guys would say? 372 00:17:18,000 --> 00:17:20,880 I'll let you lead and I'll kind of follow. 373 00:17:20,880 --> 00:17:21,880 That's kind of our thing. 374 00:17:21,880 --> 00:17:22,880 He leads, I follow. 375 00:17:22,880 --> 00:17:29,880 You know, a lot of times when I deal with people, first off, knowing that they're probably, 376 00:17:29,880 --> 00:17:33,640 you know, dealing with hurt in the situation, I have to approach it a lot like if they're 377 00:17:33,640 --> 00:17:35,920 a dog that's been struck by a car. 378 00:17:35,920 --> 00:17:36,920 Okay. 379 00:17:36,920 --> 00:17:40,600 And, you know, that's probably maybe a little graphic, but I'm trying to think of a way 380 00:17:40,600 --> 00:17:41,840 to explain it. 381 00:17:41,840 --> 00:17:47,600 Yeah, so as much as I want to help them, I know that with every movement there's going 382 00:17:47,600 --> 00:17:48,600 to be pain. 383 00:17:48,600 --> 00:17:56,000 And with, you know, that graphicness of that, you know, I'm trying to help them and at the 384 00:17:56,000 --> 00:18:00,840 same time they're going to lash out and bite and snap and, you know, because they're in 385 00:18:00,840 --> 00:18:01,840 pain. 386 00:18:01,840 --> 00:18:05,520 Even though it's good and everything, you know, the right process, you know, you're 387 00:18:05,520 --> 00:18:09,840 getting them the medical attention, you're whatever, you're giving them the word, you're 388 00:18:09,840 --> 00:18:13,640 giving them the right foundational stuff. 389 00:18:13,640 --> 00:18:16,640 In those moments, you have to remember it's not personal. 390 00:18:16,640 --> 00:18:17,960 Okay, that's good. 391 00:18:17,960 --> 00:18:19,480 It is spiritual. 392 00:18:19,480 --> 00:18:21,440 You're not fighting against flesh and blood. 393 00:18:21,440 --> 00:18:26,960 You're fighting against spiritual principalities of darkness at work. 394 00:18:26,960 --> 00:18:31,760 So if you first off, let people know that no matter what situation they're in, you know, 395 00:18:31,760 --> 00:18:37,000 marital, physical, financial, whatever it is, take out the equation that this is a physical 396 00:18:37,000 --> 00:18:40,680 thing that you're in, but it is a spiritual warfare. 397 00:18:40,680 --> 00:18:41,680 That's good. 398 00:18:41,680 --> 00:18:46,120 And that if you can say, okay, I want you to understand that I'm not attacking you, 399 00:18:46,120 --> 00:18:51,160 even though I'm going to point out the flaws and I'm going to point out not only your flaws, 400 00:18:51,160 --> 00:18:56,120 but the flaws of the situation that you both have created or your jobs created or your 401 00:18:56,120 --> 00:18:57,640 situation is created. 402 00:18:57,640 --> 00:19:03,320 You know, good choices, bad choices, doesn't matter, whatever they are, and then give them 403 00:19:03,320 --> 00:19:04,320 principles. 404 00:19:04,320 --> 00:19:06,680 Okay, let's transform our mind. 405 00:19:06,680 --> 00:19:10,520 Verse 12, verse two, it says, you know, take the word of God, you know, transform your 406 00:19:10,520 --> 00:19:16,160 mind to renewing to the word of God so that you can know the good, perfect purpose of 407 00:19:16,160 --> 00:19:17,840 what God has for you. 408 00:19:17,840 --> 00:19:23,520 So first off, you have to begin to find where you are and pray in that moment. 409 00:19:23,520 --> 00:19:26,280 Find the word that suits the situation. 410 00:19:26,280 --> 00:19:28,800 You know, if you're struggling with love, you like to tell people, okay, you're going 411 00:19:28,800 --> 00:19:30,640 to go to Corinthians chapter 13. 412 00:19:30,640 --> 00:19:32,640 You're going to read this thing over and over. 413 00:19:32,640 --> 00:19:37,200 You understand what love is, and you know, some people say, well, I'm struggling with 414 00:19:37,200 --> 00:19:38,200 faith. 415 00:19:38,200 --> 00:19:39,200 Okay, so you're going to go to the Hall of Faith. 416 00:19:39,200 --> 00:19:40,200 You're going to go to Hebrews 13. 417 00:19:40,200 --> 00:19:44,400 You're going to dig in and you're going to find now people all the time. 418 00:19:44,400 --> 00:19:49,000 I'll say, well, how do I put into practice what God wants me to be? 419 00:19:49,000 --> 00:19:50,960 Okay, so you're just a babe. 420 00:19:50,960 --> 00:19:51,960 Let's go to John. 421 00:19:51,960 --> 00:19:58,880 He's talked so simple about being just a normal believer, human being. 422 00:19:58,880 --> 00:20:03,360 You know, so we have to understand that once we identify the situation, we have to approach 423 00:20:03,360 --> 00:20:10,380 it with cautiousness, but then allow them to be hurt and allow them to be open. 424 00:20:10,380 --> 00:20:11,560 Let them be transparent. 425 00:20:11,560 --> 00:20:12,740 Allow them to lash out. 426 00:20:12,740 --> 00:20:14,280 Let them be human. 427 00:20:14,280 --> 00:20:15,280 Yeah. 428 00:20:15,280 --> 00:20:16,280 Yeah. 429 00:20:16,280 --> 00:20:18,320 And then say, okay, here's what you've got to do. 430 00:20:18,320 --> 00:20:21,880 And then let them know you got to rejoice in the moments. 431 00:20:21,880 --> 00:20:22,880 Up or down. 432 00:20:22,880 --> 00:20:23,880 Doesn't matter. 433 00:20:23,880 --> 00:20:24,880 It's it is a roller coaster. 434 00:20:24,880 --> 00:20:25,880 We're in life. 435 00:20:25,880 --> 00:20:26,880 Yeah. 436 00:20:26,880 --> 00:20:29,040 And in those moments, you got to find your God. 437 00:20:29,040 --> 00:20:34,280 You've got to find your opportunity to allow him to speak to you, which means you need 438 00:20:34,280 --> 00:20:35,280 to shut up. 439 00:20:35,280 --> 00:20:36,280 That's good. 440 00:20:36,280 --> 00:20:37,280 Yeah. 441 00:20:37,280 --> 00:20:41,040 And, you know, most people want to go to God and say, well, you're my sugar daddy in the 442 00:20:41,040 --> 00:20:42,040 sky. 443 00:20:42,040 --> 00:20:43,040 Fix this for me. 444 00:20:43,040 --> 00:20:45,040 Well, that's not what God is. 445 00:20:45,040 --> 00:20:46,040 Right. 446 00:20:46,040 --> 00:20:52,600 You know, so with that, you know, I think we, you know, we deal with people that think, 447 00:20:52,600 --> 00:20:54,160 well, I got saved. 448 00:20:54,160 --> 00:20:56,160 It's peaches and cream. 449 00:20:56,160 --> 00:20:58,040 No, far from it. 450 00:20:58,040 --> 00:21:00,160 No, it's not. 451 00:21:00,160 --> 00:21:06,960 Because on that on the other side, on the non pastoral side, the civilian side or whatever 452 00:21:06,960 --> 00:21:07,960 you want to call it. 453 00:21:07,960 --> 00:21:13,120 I mean, I don't even know a term if there was a term, but hurts going to happen. 454 00:21:13,120 --> 00:21:14,120 Right. 455 00:21:14,120 --> 00:21:15,920 It's going to happen. 456 00:21:15,920 --> 00:21:18,800 And it's OK to not be OK. 457 00:21:18,800 --> 00:21:22,560 We've got to understand that it's OK not to be OK. 458 00:21:22,560 --> 00:21:25,520 But staying in the hurt is a choice. 459 00:21:25,520 --> 00:21:28,360 It's a choice. 460 00:21:28,360 --> 00:21:33,760 And John was talking about how, you know, OK, you're a babe in Christ. 461 00:21:33,760 --> 00:21:39,920 OK, well, that means just like any other life skill, you're going to have to practice. 462 00:21:39,920 --> 00:21:44,020 You're going to have to practice praise in the good and the bad. 463 00:21:44,020 --> 00:21:48,760 You're going to have to practice prayer in the good and the bad. 464 00:21:48,760 --> 00:21:50,920 This is her teacher coming. 465 00:21:50,920 --> 00:21:51,920 This is I'm sorry. 466 00:21:51,920 --> 00:21:53,800 Yes, I'm a teacher by trade. 467 00:21:53,800 --> 00:21:56,640 I'm 14 years, I think. 468 00:21:56,640 --> 00:21:59,080 Yeah, 14 years of teaching. 469 00:21:59,080 --> 00:22:03,840 But it's one of those just that situation where we got to make a choice here. 470 00:22:03,840 --> 00:22:04,840 Yes. 471 00:22:04,840 --> 00:22:11,640 Are you going to wallow in self pity or are we going to stand up, put on our armor of 472 00:22:11,640 --> 00:22:18,720 God, grab those arsenals that we're talking about prayer, praise the Bible, reading the 473 00:22:18,720 --> 00:22:27,760 Word, getting with fellowship with strong Christian friends or as your loving boy said 474 00:22:27,760 --> 00:22:29,800 this morning, Framley. 475 00:22:29,800 --> 00:22:30,800 We are Framley. 476 00:22:30,800 --> 00:22:31,800 We are Framley. 477 00:22:31,800 --> 00:22:36,720 We're friends that are now family. 478 00:22:36,720 --> 00:22:44,240 In order to get to a place where we can get past that hurt. 479 00:22:44,240 --> 00:22:52,280 And then what happens is your hurt becomes groundwork for somebody else that you can 480 00:22:52,280 --> 00:22:55,880 push into or you can say, Hey, you know what? 481 00:22:55,880 --> 00:22:57,840 I've been through that. 482 00:22:57,840 --> 00:23:00,280 I know how you feel. 483 00:23:00,280 --> 00:23:02,560 I know what you're going through. 484 00:23:02,560 --> 00:23:06,000 I understand the hurt and the pain. 485 00:23:06,000 --> 00:23:07,000 Let me help you. 486 00:23:07,000 --> 00:23:08,000 Yeah. 487 00:23:08,000 --> 00:23:09,000 Yeah. 488 00:23:09,000 --> 00:23:10,000 Let me help you. 489 00:23:10,000 --> 00:23:11,000 Let's go have coffee. 490 00:23:11,000 --> 00:23:12,000 Let's go talk. 491 00:23:12,000 --> 00:23:14,200 Let's go have some real conversations because we've talked about that before. 492 00:23:14,200 --> 00:23:19,280 It's like, let's not say, Oh, I'm going to just pray for you. 493 00:23:19,280 --> 00:23:22,160 Let's stop and pray and walk away. 494 00:23:22,160 --> 00:23:26,880 And even Heather Eschenbaum said that on Wednesday. 495 00:23:26,880 --> 00:23:28,680 If you tell me to pray for you, I'm going to pray for you. 496 00:23:28,680 --> 00:23:30,760 I'm not going to pray and walk away. 497 00:23:30,760 --> 00:23:32,000 Let's pray together. 498 00:23:32,000 --> 00:23:33,000 Let's go have coffee. 499 00:23:33,000 --> 00:23:41,360 Let's sit down and have real conversations about, okay, what could the underlying situation 500 00:23:41,360 --> 00:23:44,800 be that causes this hurt or caused that hurt? 501 00:23:44,800 --> 00:23:51,640 And if it happens again or we get a trigger, what are we going to do? 502 00:23:51,640 --> 00:23:56,360 Because sometimes, yes, prayers are effective. 503 00:23:56,360 --> 00:23:58,680 Period. 504 00:23:58,680 --> 00:24:09,600 I'll say though that also sometimes it can be more effective or additionally effective 505 00:24:09,600 --> 00:24:13,120 in a way as really bad language. 506 00:24:13,120 --> 00:24:26,040 But getting into somebody's life and making that connection and it's, John, I can pray 507 00:24:26,040 --> 00:24:27,040 for you. 508 00:24:27,040 --> 00:24:29,440 You can come up to me and say, brother, I need prayer. 509 00:24:29,440 --> 00:24:30,440 Okay, let's pray. 510 00:24:30,440 --> 00:24:32,120 Let's pray for this breakthrough. 511 00:24:32,120 --> 00:24:35,640 Let's pray for this to get over this obstacle. 512 00:24:35,640 --> 00:24:43,920 But it's almost more effective if you make that connection. 513 00:24:43,920 --> 00:24:46,840 Because I've thought about it. 514 00:24:46,840 --> 00:24:56,920 It's like during church, during worship, it's one thing to go up all of a sudden, it's like 515 00:24:56,920 --> 00:25:01,160 you're worshiping next to somebody. 516 00:25:01,160 --> 00:25:07,120 You're pushing for the kingdom, but you're just standing there next to somebody and you 517 00:25:07,120 --> 00:25:14,200 both are worshiping versus you have a connection with somebody and you both go up together 518 00:25:14,200 --> 00:25:20,400 or you join somebody that's there and you are worshiping together to push forth the 519 00:25:20,400 --> 00:25:21,400 kingdom. 520 00:25:21,400 --> 00:25:22,400 You're storming the gates of hell together. 521 00:25:22,400 --> 00:25:23,400 It is. 522 00:25:23,400 --> 00:25:24,400 Yes. 523 00:25:24,400 --> 00:25:25,400 And it is. 524 00:25:25,400 --> 00:25:27,640 It's something about that connection. 525 00:25:27,640 --> 00:25:33,480 And I think that's what I like, Tracy, about that concept of I won't just pray for you, 526 00:25:33,480 --> 00:25:36,040 but I'll make that connection with you. 527 00:25:36,040 --> 00:25:37,040 Let's be friends. 528 00:25:37,040 --> 00:25:44,240 Let's get into each other's lives because that can possibly be more effective than just 529 00:25:44,240 --> 00:25:45,240 a prayer. 530 00:25:45,240 --> 00:25:46,240 Absolutely. 531 00:25:46,240 --> 00:25:48,120 Oh, it's for sure effective. 532 00:25:48,120 --> 00:25:52,200 And we do stuff all the time like this. 533 00:25:52,200 --> 00:25:57,600 We have a gentleman that's, he's old enough to be my father and my grandfather, really 534 00:25:57,600 --> 00:26:00,120 served in the military and whatnot. 535 00:26:00,120 --> 00:26:03,440 I spent lots of money to do reloading with him. 536 00:26:03,440 --> 00:26:09,160 I've always wanted to do reloading, but really I don't have the time to do reloading. 537 00:26:09,160 --> 00:26:14,960 But he needed somebody to just listen and to show love. 538 00:26:14,960 --> 00:26:16,800 And we went to eat. 539 00:26:16,800 --> 00:26:19,880 We've done all kinds of stuff together. 540 00:26:19,880 --> 00:26:26,720 His demeanor since the first job I did for him till now has changed. 541 00:26:26,720 --> 00:26:33,640 So it's not just about, it's not just word, it's not just those that are saved or those 542 00:26:33,640 --> 00:26:35,520 that aren't saved. 543 00:26:35,520 --> 00:26:39,560 So yeah, relationship has a huge play. 544 00:26:39,560 --> 00:26:43,360 And people can tell whether you really mean it or not. 545 00:26:43,360 --> 00:26:46,360 If you say you're going to pray on Sunday and you don't call them on Monday and say, 546 00:26:46,360 --> 00:26:47,360 how are you doing today? 547 00:26:47,360 --> 00:26:50,360 You're probably just a liar. 548 00:26:50,360 --> 00:26:55,160 So that's probably a lot of truth in that. 549 00:26:55,160 --> 00:27:01,880 And when you're talking about relationship, again, my story of how I became a Christian, 550 00:27:01,880 --> 00:27:03,840 it was through that relationship. 551 00:27:03,840 --> 00:27:09,620 My neighbor became my friend and wanted to actually get into my life and welcomed me 552 00:27:09,620 --> 00:27:11,280 into his life. 553 00:27:11,280 --> 00:27:16,400 It never talked about Jesus, never talked about the church, never talked about the Bible. 554 00:27:16,400 --> 00:27:17,400 He just- 555 00:27:17,400 --> 00:27:18,400 Lived it out loud. 556 00:27:18,400 --> 00:27:22,200 Yeah, lived out loud and let's share life. 557 00:27:22,200 --> 00:27:27,200 And that was, I was like, you know, he's a cool guy. 558 00:27:27,200 --> 00:27:29,640 Whatever is in him, I want some of that. 559 00:27:29,640 --> 00:27:31,680 I'll give it a shot. 560 00:27:31,680 --> 00:27:34,280 And that's how I became a Christian. 561 00:27:34,280 --> 00:27:35,640 Brings a greater change. 562 00:27:35,640 --> 00:27:36,640 It does. 563 00:27:36,640 --> 00:27:37,640 It really does. 564 00:27:37,640 --> 00:27:38,640 Yeah. 565 00:27:38,640 --> 00:27:42,520 Because it's that connection. 566 00:27:42,520 --> 00:27:48,240 It's not just like a promise of, oh, if you become a Christian, you'll get a better life. 567 00:27:48,240 --> 00:27:53,560 God will fix your problems if you come to church. 568 00:27:53,560 --> 00:27:57,240 He'll give you wisdom and discernment and tell you to stop being a knucklehead. 569 00:27:57,240 --> 00:27:58,240 Yes. 570 00:27:58,240 --> 00:27:59,240 And then you'll make better decisions. 571 00:27:59,240 --> 00:28:00,680 And a lot of people don't like that. 572 00:28:00,680 --> 00:28:02,240 And they don't like that speech. 573 00:28:02,240 --> 00:28:03,240 No. 574 00:28:03,240 --> 00:28:05,900 It's like you get to change. 575 00:28:05,900 --> 00:28:11,760 You now have a blueprint to where you can walk in abundance and goodness, but you also 576 00:28:11,760 --> 00:28:16,880 know how to use the bazookas and learn how to use the arsenal because you will be having 577 00:28:16,880 --> 00:28:19,840 to war and fight for these things. 578 00:28:19,840 --> 00:28:25,920 But you'll be able to fight from an advantage point of God as opposed to the enemy. 579 00:28:25,920 --> 00:28:26,920 Yeah. 580 00:28:26,920 --> 00:28:27,920 Yeah. 581 00:28:27,920 --> 00:28:28,920 Yeah. 582 00:28:28,920 --> 00:28:40,360 So I will shift to sort of a practical question because I know the two of you have done so 583 00:28:40,360 --> 00:28:45,840 much ministry and been pastors and all of that. 584 00:28:45,840 --> 00:28:51,880 A lot of life in churches. 585 00:28:51,880 --> 00:29:00,240 How do you two as a couple, as a married couple, as parents, when all the attacks and all the 586 00:29:00,240 --> 00:29:09,760 arrows are coming at you from outside, how do the two of you stay connected? 587 00:29:09,760 --> 00:29:15,800 Keep that marriage bond strengthened and unified while all the attacks and all the fires are 588 00:29:15,800 --> 00:29:16,800 going on around you? 589 00:29:16,800 --> 00:29:26,960 I know for me, I hate to say I'm a rock, but I'm very much, I'm very solid in where I stand 590 00:29:26,960 --> 00:29:29,960 and what I believe. 591 00:29:29,960 --> 00:29:31,600 That didn't come easy. 592 00:29:31,600 --> 00:29:33,000 That came with a price. 593 00:29:33,000 --> 00:29:42,200 But at the same time, I am one that reaffirms and reaffirms in the, probably in my labors 594 00:29:42,200 --> 00:29:46,760 of what I want to support or how I do things. 595 00:29:46,760 --> 00:29:49,640 When everything else is falling apart, I'm probably the first one to say, okay, that's 596 00:29:49,640 --> 00:29:50,640 enough. 597 00:29:50,640 --> 00:29:55,800 Shut up, knock it off, be quiet, let's move on. 598 00:29:55,800 --> 00:30:02,600 But at the same time, it's kind of like, just as of recent, it was kind of like, okay, you're 599 00:30:02,600 --> 00:30:04,860 not in this for this. 600 00:30:04,860 --> 00:30:10,560 Get up, pull the blankets off your head, smile. 601 00:30:10,560 --> 00:30:13,800 You're doing this for Jesus and you're doing this for those that are much smaller than 602 00:30:13,800 --> 00:30:15,800 you. 603 00:30:15,800 --> 00:30:19,760 My wife just kind of liked me and she goes, I know you're right. 604 00:30:19,760 --> 00:30:21,760 I hate those conversations. 605 00:30:21,760 --> 00:30:26,560 She's probably giving me the evil eye of not looking at her. 606 00:30:26,560 --> 00:30:27,560 But they're needed. 607 00:30:27,560 --> 00:30:28,560 Those conversations are needed. 608 00:30:28,560 --> 00:30:36,160 But I mean, even, we always say outside, but before we came to where we are now and enjoying 609 00:30:36,160 --> 00:30:45,280 the body where we are now, we served for two or three years and we were associate pastors. 610 00:30:45,280 --> 00:30:50,080 The thing that hurt the most is when I heard that they were rejecting the anointing of 611 00:30:50,080 --> 00:30:54,080 God and rejecting what God was doing. 612 00:30:54,080 --> 00:31:02,480 So now the attack was not just, okay, do you play nice and just walk in religion? 613 00:31:02,480 --> 00:31:06,600 Do you just get comfy because everybody else is staying comfy? 614 00:31:06,600 --> 00:31:09,400 Why do you have to rock the boat? 615 00:31:09,400 --> 00:31:10,400 So the attack came immediately. 616 00:31:10,400 --> 00:31:12,640 Well, you just don't want to submit to authority. 617 00:31:12,640 --> 00:31:16,560 You don't want to, you don't like the way we're doing it. 618 00:31:16,560 --> 00:31:17,560 You want your own church. 619 00:31:17,560 --> 00:31:22,640 You want to be the head. 620 00:31:22,640 --> 00:31:28,600 And it's in those moments, you know, I personally struggled. 621 00:31:28,600 --> 00:31:32,000 Not because I wanted to be the head. 622 00:31:32,000 --> 00:31:36,120 Many a times I said, God, I don't want to preach another time. 623 00:31:36,120 --> 00:31:39,400 Just recently had one of those moments where I'm not doing this. 624 00:31:39,400 --> 00:31:42,200 And I got the, you know, kind of the look like, yeah, you are. 625 00:31:42,200 --> 00:31:43,200 You got the mama look. 626 00:31:43,200 --> 00:31:44,200 Not for me either. 627 00:31:44,200 --> 00:31:53,040 And then had to be told again, quit, you know, quit doubting what God's done and speak. 628 00:31:53,040 --> 00:31:58,840 And so sometimes even myself, I find myself doubting not because I doubt my faith or where 629 00:31:58,840 --> 00:32:02,400 I'm at, but I doubt, I doubt the church. 630 00:32:02,400 --> 00:32:06,640 You know, I doubt, you know what? 631 00:32:06,640 --> 00:32:08,560 When I see what it's doing, it hurts. 632 00:32:08,560 --> 00:32:09,560 Yeah. 633 00:32:09,560 --> 00:32:15,260 It hurts deep because I come out of so much garbage and I go, man, how can you throw this 634 00:32:15,260 --> 00:32:17,000 away? 635 00:32:17,000 --> 00:32:18,840 And some people that have been in it forever. 636 00:32:18,840 --> 00:32:20,880 I go, man, you idiot. 637 00:32:20,880 --> 00:32:25,560 You say, what's wrong with you? 638 00:32:25,560 --> 00:32:29,960 So when we come here, you know, we come here with pain, we came here with hurt, we came 639 00:32:29,960 --> 00:32:34,480 here with the mentality, God, I ain't going nowhere. 640 00:32:34,480 --> 00:32:39,040 I want to sit on the back row as far back as I can get, as quiet as I can be. 641 00:32:39,040 --> 00:32:41,280 Let me be the church mouse. 642 00:32:41,280 --> 00:32:43,640 And I just want to worship you and be me. 643 00:32:43,640 --> 00:32:46,020 You know, I don't need nothing else. 644 00:32:46,020 --> 00:32:52,760 So in those moments, you know, is God's very good at dragging us out, you know, you know, 645 00:32:52,760 --> 00:32:53,760 from all sides. 646 00:32:53,760 --> 00:32:57,200 I think in those moments I had to make up my mind. 647 00:32:57,200 --> 00:32:58,840 It wasn't about me. 648 00:32:58,840 --> 00:32:59,840 Yeah, it's good. 649 00:32:59,840 --> 00:33:01,880 And it isn't about me. 650 00:33:01,880 --> 00:33:02,880 Yeah. 651 00:33:02,880 --> 00:33:08,160 And, you know, we're where we are for a purpose on purpose. 652 00:33:08,160 --> 00:33:14,200 You know, so I have to keep it in front of me that, you know, I have to keep, you know, 653 00:33:14,200 --> 00:33:16,760 that which is important in front of me. 654 00:33:16,760 --> 00:33:22,160 You know, so when I keep him in front of me, when he is the main attraction of my life, 655 00:33:22,160 --> 00:33:27,040 you know, when he becomes the focus of my affection, when he is everything to me, that's 656 00:33:27,040 --> 00:33:29,920 when he'll become the center of my attention. 657 00:33:29,920 --> 00:33:36,320 That's and, you know, and it doesn't matter how you put that frontwards or backwards, 658 00:33:36,320 --> 00:33:40,080 if you get it lined up, then he just he unfolds everything. 659 00:33:40,080 --> 00:33:41,080 Yeah. 660 00:33:41,080 --> 00:33:47,200 You know, and I think the last two years of being where we are now and with you guys and 661 00:33:47,200 --> 00:33:54,400 developing friendships and you already, you know, and God saying things like, OK, now 662 00:33:54,400 --> 00:33:55,880 you need to talk about church. 663 00:33:55,880 --> 00:33:58,320 You need to talk about the war. 664 00:33:58,320 --> 00:34:00,640 You need to talk about the body. 665 00:34:00,640 --> 00:34:02,600 You need to talk about how to recover. 666 00:34:02,600 --> 00:34:03,600 You need to. 667 00:34:03,600 --> 00:34:04,600 Yeah. 668 00:34:04,600 --> 00:34:07,760 So it's obvious that, you know, we're not the only ones that have had to stand in tough 669 00:34:07,760 --> 00:34:12,880 times and say, OK, God, you know, evidently you you're allowing people to do this. 670 00:34:12,880 --> 00:34:14,040 Yeah, it's not. 671 00:34:14,040 --> 00:34:15,040 It's not that. 672 00:34:15,040 --> 00:34:24,960 You know, so, yeah, recovery from moments that are difficult inside or out. 673 00:34:24,960 --> 00:34:28,680 You have to make up your mind that it's not about you. 674 00:34:28,680 --> 00:34:29,680 Yeah. 675 00:34:29,680 --> 00:34:34,280 What I also heard, though, John, when you were talking and saying this is what I heard 676 00:34:34,280 --> 00:34:40,760 was you've also allowed yourself to be so incredibly transparent with God. 677 00:34:40,760 --> 00:34:42,120 Like you know what I mean? 678 00:34:42,120 --> 00:34:44,680 Like I am I am a man. 679 00:34:44,680 --> 00:34:45,680 I am faulted. 680 00:34:45,680 --> 00:34:46,680 I am frail. 681 00:34:46,680 --> 00:34:47,680 I am foolish. 682 00:34:47,680 --> 00:34:54,040 I don't I don't have this, but what I do have is God and what he has restored in my life 683 00:34:54,040 --> 00:34:55,720 is is priceless. 684 00:34:55,720 --> 00:34:59,720 And you're not willing to give that up for anything or anybody or any position. 685 00:34:59,720 --> 00:35:00,920 Oh, absolutely. 686 00:35:00,920 --> 00:35:07,080 And I think from the ministry part of it, when it comes to ministers, because I've been 687 00:35:07,080 --> 00:35:11,880 in church all my life, like I've walked through, you know, church hurts. 688 00:35:11,880 --> 00:35:14,720 I've walked through, you know, like church splits. 689 00:35:14,720 --> 00:35:19,800 I'll literally the pillars walking out of the room kind of scenario and you're going, 690 00:35:19,800 --> 00:35:24,720 I don't even know where my foundation lies because our foundation starts lying in people 691 00:35:24,720 --> 00:35:26,640 as opposed to God. 692 00:35:26,640 --> 00:35:27,800 And then you know what I mean? 693 00:35:27,800 --> 00:35:33,400 And then it and then it creates and then it creates false expectations. 694 00:35:33,400 --> 00:35:34,400 Yes. 695 00:35:34,400 --> 00:35:35,400 On to people. 696 00:35:35,400 --> 00:35:36,400 Yes. 697 00:35:36,400 --> 00:35:44,200 And what I heard in you was, I just I just want to be so in love with God that and to 698 00:35:44,200 --> 00:35:47,640 show other people that they can have that too. 699 00:35:47,640 --> 00:35:48,640 Yep. 700 00:35:48,640 --> 00:35:53,640 You know, we try to serve in everything we do. 701 00:35:53,640 --> 00:36:00,320 And we have found that that has been our one of our ministries that God has used us in 702 00:36:00,320 --> 00:36:02,840 and really it helps us stay selfless. 703 00:36:02,840 --> 00:36:03,840 Yeah. 704 00:36:03,840 --> 00:36:07,480 It helps us stay in love with the Lord and helps us stay humble. 705 00:36:07,480 --> 00:36:12,200 God needs us to be humble. 706 00:36:12,200 --> 00:36:14,840 He needs us to be open, transparent. 707 00:36:14,840 --> 00:36:16,760 We have to remind ourselves that people are people. 708 00:36:16,760 --> 00:36:19,420 Tracy, you said it like people are people, right? 709 00:36:19,420 --> 00:36:23,140 Like we have to understand that hurt people hurt people. 710 00:36:23,140 --> 00:36:24,440 We hear it all the time, right? 711 00:36:24,440 --> 00:36:28,080 We teach our kids that because you being a school teacher, me being a substitute teacher, 712 00:36:28,080 --> 00:36:33,040 just we look at these kids and we go, you know, you're going to hurt somebody if you're 713 00:36:33,040 --> 00:36:34,360 hurting still. 714 00:36:34,360 --> 00:36:39,320 So let me help you with that hurt so that way you're no longer somebody that's projecting 715 00:36:39,320 --> 00:36:49,680 pain, but you're somebody that's coming and helping heal that pain. 716 00:36:49,680 --> 00:36:51,880 You said it all, babe. 717 00:36:51,880 --> 00:36:54,880 I didn't mean to. 718 00:36:54,880 --> 00:36:57,000 I mean, that was good. 719 00:36:57,000 --> 00:37:00,040 I was trying to find a way to simplify it and I wasn't doing a good job. 720 00:37:00,040 --> 00:37:01,760 No, I think I think that was good. 721 00:37:01,760 --> 00:37:02,760 I think that's what it is. 722 00:37:02,760 --> 00:37:04,600 I think that's part of our problem. 723 00:37:04,600 --> 00:37:05,600 Can I say it that way? 724 00:37:05,600 --> 00:37:06,680 I think that's part of our problem. 725 00:37:06,680 --> 00:37:09,400 I think we make things too complicated. 726 00:37:09,400 --> 00:37:11,160 I think the enemy wants to come in, right? 727 00:37:11,160 --> 00:37:14,940 He wants to come in, still kill and destroy, but he also wants to create confusion. 728 00:37:14,940 --> 00:37:17,940 He wants to make it harder than what it actually is. 729 00:37:17,940 --> 00:37:21,000 This walk with God, is it hard? 730 00:37:21,000 --> 00:37:22,000 Yes. 731 00:37:22,000 --> 00:37:25,160 Because we have an adversary, but is it hard because of God? 732 00:37:25,160 --> 00:37:26,160 No. 733 00:37:26,160 --> 00:37:28,000 He is such a good, good father. 734 00:37:28,000 --> 00:37:30,320 His yoke is easy, right? 735 00:37:30,320 --> 00:37:32,200 His burden is light. 736 00:37:32,200 --> 00:37:39,160 When we walk with him, just the joy in the midst of the pain, the peace that comes in 737 00:37:39,160 --> 00:37:41,800 the midst of all of it, right? 738 00:37:41,800 --> 00:37:45,160 There's all of the goodness that comes with God. 739 00:37:45,160 --> 00:37:47,040 It's the enemy. 740 00:37:47,040 --> 00:37:51,480 It's the people that are trying to either downplay God or maybe they just don't know 741 00:37:51,480 --> 00:37:53,280 God in that capacity. 742 00:37:53,280 --> 00:38:01,360 Or maybe they put their expectation into something outside of what God wanted to do. 743 00:38:01,360 --> 00:38:07,440 Because Tracy, you actually wrote something down that triggered that thought. 744 00:38:07,440 --> 00:38:11,880 What was your number eight? 745 00:38:11,880 --> 00:38:20,080 How to stand in time of adversary or the storm, or just when you pray and you're waiting for 746 00:38:20,080 --> 00:38:25,360 an answer, you've got to be devoted in the waiting. 747 00:38:25,360 --> 00:38:27,680 Devoted in the waiting. 748 00:38:27,680 --> 00:38:30,560 Like John's like what you're saying. 749 00:38:30,560 --> 00:38:31,560 This is my preset. 750 00:38:31,560 --> 00:38:33,680 Like this is my preset. 751 00:38:33,680 --> 00:38:37,360 At the same time, John, I keep picking on you a little bit. 752 00:38:37,360 --> 00:38:38,360 I don't mean to. 753 00:38:38,360 --> 00:38:39,360 I got broad shoulders. 754 00:38:39,360 --> 00:38:40,360 I know you do. 755 00:38:40,360 --> 00:38:41,360 You've got big. 756 00:38:41,360 --> 00:38:48,840 But like those moments, because I know my guy, my amazing guy, where when, okay, so 757 00:38:48,840 --> 00:38:49,840 we're gym rats. 758 00:38:49,840 --> 00:38:50,840 You guys know this. 759 00:38:50,840 --> 00:38:51,840 We went to the gym. 760 00:38:51,840 --> 00:38:52,840 You took our boy to breakfast. 761 00:38:52,840 --> 00:38:53,840 Sweet, sweet, right? 762 00:38:53,840 --> 00:38:54,840 Precious. 763 00:38:54,840 --> 00:38:55,840 I didn't have sex during the week. 764 00:38:55,840 --> 00:38:56,840 What's wrong with you? 765 00:38:56,840 --> 00:38:57,840 It's fine. 766 00:38:57,840 --> 00:39:01,600 What's wrong with you is when we go to the gym, okay, so people are half naked. 767 00:39:01,600 --> 00:39:03,920 Bless him is what we can say. 768 00:39:03,920 --> 00:39:11,640 And he will protect his eyes and bounce his eyes to protect my heart. 769 00:39:11,640 --> 00:39:16,680 And when you have presets, right, as a man of God, as the head of your household, you 770 00:39:16,680 --> 00:39:21,080 know, even that beautiful girl of yours out there, you know, you're teaching her, she's 771 00:39:21,080 --> 00:39:22,160 watching you. 772 00:39:22,160 --> 00:39:27,680 This is the man that I, this is some day that like I wanted guy like this to marry, right? 773 00:39:27,680 --> 00:39:29,280 You want to be that example for her. 774 00:39:29,280 --> 00:39:36,840 And it's, and it's that space where you say, I will protect my peace at all cost because 775 00:39:36,840 --> 00:39:38,760 of the peace that's behind me. 776 00:39:38,760 --> 00:39:40,020 Yes. 777 00:39:40,020 --> 00:39:41,840 Because of the peace. 778 00:39:41,840 --> 00:39:42,840 You know what I mean? 779 00:39:42,840 --> 00:39:46,580 It's like, it's understanding our positions. 780 00:39:46,580 --> 00:39:48,640 Even the women of God, we're the same way. 781 00:39:48,640 --> 00:39:50,600 I'm not going to listen to the gossip. 782 00:39:50,600 --> 00:39:52,160 You start bashing your husband. 783 00:39:52,160 --> 00:39:53,160 I'm out. 784 00:39:53,160 --> 00:39:54,160 For real. 785 00:39:54,160 --> 00:39:55,160 I'm sorry. 786 00:39:55,160 --> 00:39:56,280 I don't do that. 787 00:39:56,280 --> 00:39:59,640 We don't, we don't, we don't spouse bash. 788 00:39:59,640 --> 00:40:04,440 If I, if I hear somebody do it, we either walk away or I'll go, wow. 789 00:40:04,440 --> 00:40:06,080 And you're the idiot that married them. 790 00:40:06,080 --> 00:40:07,080 Interesting. 791 00:40:07,080 --> 00:40:09,560 Oh, so you put the wedge in. 792 00:40:09,560 --> 00:40:11,840 So you're ready for separation. 793 00:40:11,840 --> 00:40:18,360 You know, and it's like protecting, protecting the peace at all cost, you know, like read 794 00:40:18,360 --> 00:40:19,360 that again. 795 00:40:19,360 --> 00:40:23,600 Could you number being devoted in the waiting, being devoted in the way we got it. 796 00:40:23,600 --> 00:40:27,840 We've got it because there's such a battle going on right now. 797 00:40:27,840 --> 00:40:29,760 You guys can see it in me and feel it in me. 798 00:40:29,760 --> 00:40:32,360 Like I'm, I'm, I'm pretty ramped up. 799 00:40:32,360 --> 00:40:38,840 I am ramped up because I see the onslaught of the enemy to the families. 800 00:40:38,840 --> 00:40:39,840 Yeah. 801 00:40:39,840 --> 00:40:42,600 And for sure. 802 00:40:42,600 --> 00:40:46,920 And earlier when we were talking about that, being the, you know, devoted in the waiting, 803 00:40:46,920 --> 00:40:52,840 like again, my mind went to the, the warrior mindset, the soldier mindset of, you know, 804 00:40:52,840 --> 00:40:56,840 how many times in the military did I go through the, the hurry up and wait? 805 00:40:56,840 --> 00:41:01,320 And even when it's you're waiting, you're still, you're focused on the mission. 806 00:41:01,320 --> 00:41:03,320 You're making sure your gear is in top shape. 807 00:41:03,320 --> 00:41:06,540 You're making sure your weapon is, is clean and ready. 808 00:41:06,540 --> 00:41:11,040 You know, so it's like, you've got all this stuff to do while you're waiting for the next 809 00:41:11,040 --> 00:41:12,040 thing to happen. 810 00:41:12,040 --> 00:41:13,040 Yes. 811 00:41:13,040 --> 00:41:19,280 And it's, I think us as Christians, you know, you know, especially, you know, because of 812 00:41:19,280 --> 00:41:25,080 this podcast, I'll say, you know, especially as married couples, it's like, what can we 813 00:41:25,080 --> 00:41:31,480 do those, those practical steps to walk out, to make sure that, that our marriage is tight, 814 00:41:31,480 --> 00:41:38,240 our marriage is solid, our kids are, are focused, you know, those things that while we're waiting 815 00:41:38,240 --> 00:41:44,880 for the next step, what, what can we work on to make sure that the maintenance is taken 816 00:41:44,880 --> 00:41:45,880 care of? 817 00:41:45,880 --> 00:41:46,880 Absolutely. 818 00:41:46,880 --> 00:41:52,160 And I, I know for us, like something we struggle in, just being transparent. 819 00:41:52,160 --> 00:41:57,520 I am, I'm a praying the night, reading the night, you know, Lord deal with me, you know, 820 00:41:57,520 --> 00:42:00,160 cause it's all, I'm the problem here. 821 00:42:00,160 --> 00:42:01,160 I am the issue. 822 00:42:01,160 --> 00:42:02,160 God, it's me. 823 00:42:02,160 --> 00:42:03,160 Yeah. 824 00:42:03,160 --> 00:42:09,160 You know, so I, you know, my, my way of doing things and her way of doing things, she likes 825 00:42:09,160 --> 00:42:12,240 getting up at the morning, drinking coffee and reading her Bible. 826 00:42:12,240 --> 00:42:14,880 So of course I'm out the door and you know, I'm doing my thing. 827 00:42:14,880 --> 00:42:19,240 So we don't do a lot of together reading, you know, so it's an area that we struggle 828 00:42:19,240 --> 00:42:24,040 with does, you know, would it, would it help and would it be beneficial if we did more 829 00:42:24,040 --> 00:42:25,040 of it together? 830 00:42:25,040 --> 00:42:26,040 Oh, absolutely. 831 00:42:26,040 --> 00:42:27,040 Yeah, absolutely. 832 00:42:27,040 --> 00:42:28,040 Yeah. 833 00:42:28,040 --> 00:42:29,040 100%. 834 00:42:29,040 --> 00:42:30,040 We've talked about it many times and we've done family time. 835 00:42:30,040 --> 00:42:35,040 And of course my wife, she's, I can feel her eyes looking to be gone. 836 00:42:35,040 --> 00:42:38,040 I don't know what you're talking about. 837 00:42:38,040 --> 00:42:39,040 She's looking to be folks. 838 00:42:39,040 --> 00:42:40,040 She's looking to be. 839 00:42:40,040 --> 00:42:44,040 If I don't leave this room, I'll tell you where I'm at. 840 00:42:44,040 --> 00:42:50,040 But in this moment, you know, we, we take it, we set aside time, but things can get 841 00:42:50,040 --> 00:42:51,040 out of control. 842 00:42:51,040 --> 00:42:52,040 Yeah. 843 00:42:52,040 --> 00:42:58,200 Men of faith and it just as men in general, as spouses in general, we have to, you know, 844 00:42:58,200 --> 00:43:02,440 we have to set up a guideline and we have to say, okay, we're going to do this or we're 845 00:43:02,440 --> 00:43:07,480 going to, uh, you know, it doesn't matter what it is, whether, you know, it's sexual. 846 00:43:07,480 --> 00:43:12,680 Okay, honey, if we have to put it on a schedule, Wednesdays our day, we're hitting our, hitting 847 00:43:12,680 --> 00:43:13,680 our markets. 848 00:43:13,680 --> 00:43:17,040 You know, whatever it is, you know, I, you know, there was a time in our life where things 849 00:43:17,040 --> 00:43:22,400 were kind of, you know, we went through a loss and, and my wife was really struggling. 850 00:43:22,400 --> 00:43:23,400 I just had to go to her. 851 00:43:23,400 --> 00:43:24,680 I said, honey, I'm a man. 852 00:43:24,680 --> 00:43:26,120 I'm a hungry man. 853 00:43:26,120 --> 00:43:29,960 I need you intimately, like on a regular schedule. 854 00:43:29,960 --> 00:43:30,960 Yeah. 855 00:43:30,960 --> 00:43:31,960 So I don't want to be intimate. 856 00:43:31,960 --> 00:43:32,960 I'm like, no, you don't understand. 857 00:43:32,960 --> 00:43:33,960 This isn't about you. 858 00:43:33,960 --> 00:43:34,960 Right. 859 00:43:34,960 --> 00:43:35,960 So, yeah. 860 00:43:35,960 --> 00:43:38,520 So, you know, we had to be transparent. 861 00:43:38,520 --> 00:43:41,920 We had to just be open, but it's another thing. 862 00:43:41,920 --> 00:43:47,520 You know, when, when, you know, sometimes, you know, I, I don't get as sentimental about 863 00:43:47,520 --> 00:43:52,960 things as she might, or, you know, that she has, and I have to find those things important 864 00:43:52,960 --> 00:43:53,960 as well. 865 00:43:53,960 --> 00:43:54,960 Yeah. 866 00:43:54,960 --> 00:43:59,000 So what you have to do is you have to find a balance to embrace one another where you 867 00:43:59,000 --> 00:44:03,200 are and lift those moments up and encourage them. 868 00:44:03,200 --> 00:44:05,400 She wanted to go further and get her masters. 869 00:44:05,400 --> 00:44:09,040 I was like, okay, you want to go to school? 870 00:44:09,040 --> 00:44:12,680 You're an idiot, but all right, I'll push you all the way, baby. 871 00:44:12,680 --> 00:44:13,680 I'll pay the bill. 872 00:44:13,680 --> 00:44:14,680 Whatever I gotta do. 873 00:44:14,680 --> 00:44:20,360 Now I'm just kidding in a sense, but at the same time, she needed somebody that would 874 00:44:20,360 --> 00:44:21,760 say you can do it. 875 00:44:21,760 --> 00:44:22,760 Yes. 876 00:44:22,760 --> 00:44:23,760 Yeah. 877 00:44:23,760 --> 00:44:26,280 And her mom and dad, that's, you know, they always told her, you want to be this, you 878 00:44:26,280 --> 00:44:28,400 want to be that, you can do this. 879 00:44:28,400 --> 00:44:33,800 Uh, you know, I have to, I have to laugh, you know, when she was going through college, 880 00:44:33,800 --> 00:44:39,240 you know, her, her, the superintendent, the Dean, the, uh, the guy that's in charge, you'll 881 00:44:39,240 --> 00:44:43,240 never be a teacher, you know, 14 years later, I'm going, yeah, you're eating your words, 882 00:44:43,240 --> 00:44:47,200 but, you know, God don't call you to a spot by accident. 883 00:44:47,200 --> 00:44:53,640 So in the context, you have to find the things that are weak in your mate and lift those. 884 00:44:53,640 --> 00:44:54,640 That's good. 885 00:44:54,640 --> 00:44:58,880 Find the things that are strong in your mate and use those to support you where you are. 886 00:44:58,880 --> 00:44:59,880 Yeah. 887 00:44:59,880 --> 00:45:06,840 And, and not just lean on one or the other, but both ways so that you can create a balance 888 00:45:06,840 --> 00:45:09,560 that'll grow in a place. 889 00:45:09,560 --> 00:45:10,560 Is our marriage perfect? 890 00:45:10,560 --> 00:45:11,560 Probably not. 891 00:45:11,560 --> 00:45:14,400 Cause I am the hardest man in the world to live with. 892 00:45:14,400 --> 00:45:15,400 We've been around you long enough. 893 00:45:15,400 --> 00:45:16,400 I plead the fifth. 894 00:45:16,400 --> 00:45:17,400 Just kidding. 895 00:45:17,400 --> 00:45:18,400 Yeah. 896 00:45:18,400 --> 00:45:19,400 She sees she's sweet. 897 00:45:19,400 --> 00:45:20,400 I'll say it. 898 00:45:20,400 --> 00:45:21,400 I'll agree wholeheartedly with Sean. 899 00:45:21,400 --> 00:45:22,400 And I don't live with them. 900 00:45:22,400 --> 00:45:23,400 You're right. 901 00:45:23,400 --> 00:45:24,400 But. 902 00:45:24,400 --> 00:45:25,400 And that's why I plead the fifth. 903 00:45:25,400 --> 00:45:26,400 Cause I do live with them. 904 00:45:26,400 --> 00:45:36,400 So, you know, if you, if you want to do better, you have to, you have to find a way to, to 905 00:45:36,400 --> 00:45:41,960 stay strong and you know, find what your weapon is, where you are, you know, uh, are we on 906 00:45:41,960 --> 00:45:43,800 the same level spiritually? 907 00:45:43,800 --> 00:45:44,800 Probably not. 908 00:45:44,800 --> 00:45:45,800 No. 909 00:45:45,800 --> 00:45:46,800 Yeah. 910 00:45:46,800 --> 00:45:47,800 But we've gone through different things. 911 00:45:47,800 --> 00:45:49,840 You know, she was in, she's been in church her entire life. 912 00:45:49,840 --> 00:45:55,200 I haven't, you know, uh, you know, the context of where we are, but we're growing together. 913 00:45:55,200 --> 00:46:01,400 We're learning to love the Lord together and to find out, uh, you know, I, I'm bold, confident. 914 00:46:01,400 --> 00:46:06,000 I'll tell you who you are and I'll, you know, read your mail if I have to, if God lets, 915 00:46:06,000 --> 00:46:07,440 if that's the way he wants me to do it. 916 00:46:07,440 --> 00:46:10,840 But at the same time, she's quiet, meek and, and reserved. 917 00:46:10,840 --> 00:46:14,600 And then when God raises up confidence in her, then you don't want her to be. 918 00:46:14,600 --> 00:46:19,480 So God will use us where we are, but we have to embrace one another. 919 00:46:19,480 --> 00:46:20,480 Yeah. 920 00:46:20,480 --> 00:46:21,480 It's beautiful. 921 00:46:21,480 --> 00:46:25,400 So if you're available, don't miss the opportunity. 922 00:46:25,400 --> 00:46:26,400 Yeah. 923 00:46:26,400 --> 00:46:29,400 Cause I promise you're made just going, do you see what I'm doing? 924 00:46:29,400 --> 00:46:31,760 Do you, do you, do you hear what I'm at? 925 00:46:31,760 --> 00:46:32,760 Yeah. 926 00:46:32,760 --> 00:46:37,760 Uh, and that's probably an area I don't do the best in, you know, she cleans the house. 927 00:46:37,760 --> 00:46:38,760 I'm going, okay. 928 00:46:38,760 --> 00:46:43,440 I don't say the words of affirmation. 929 00:46:43,440 --> 00:46:44,920 She wants the affirmation. 930 00:46:44,920 --> 00:46:45,920 I want acknowledgement. 931 00:46:45,920 --> 00:46:46,920 Like look what I did. 932 00:46:46,920 --> 00:46:47,920 Yeah. 933 00:46:47,920 --> 00:46:48,920 I did this. 934 00:46:48,920 --> 00:46:49,920 I accomplished this today. 935 00:46:49,920 --> 00:46:50,920 Yeah. 936 00:46:50,920 --> 00:46:55,240 I've just looked at Luke and I'll just say, do you see I cleaned the bathroom today? 937 00:46:55,240 --> 00:46:56,240 I did, baby. 938 00:46:56,240 --> 00:46:57,240 It looks good. 939 00:46:57,240 --> 00:46:58,240 Thank you. 940 00:46:58,240 --> 00:47:03,320 I just, I just, I just, well, I just, I tell him, this is what I did. 941 00:47:03,320 --> 00:47:04,320 Did you see? 942 00:47:04,320 --> 00:47:05,320 I did, babe. 943 00:47:05,320 --> 00:47:06,320 That looks good. 944 00:47:06,320 --> 00:47:07,320 Okay. 945 00:47:07,320 --> 00:47:08,320 I'm gonna probably get ran out. 946 00:47:08,320 --> 00:47:09,320 Probably. 947 00:47:09,320 --> 00:47:15,680 But as a man, you know, I would rather just, I mean, I guess when it comes to my maid, 948 00:47:15,680 --> 00:47:17,800 I'm like, just tell me what you want. 949 00:47:17,800 --> 00:47:18,800 You want flowers? 950 00:47:18,800 --> 00:47:19,800 Just tell me you want flowers. 951 00:47:19,800 --> 00:47:21,160 You want a box of chocolate? 952 00:47:21,160 --> 00:47:22,160 Tell me you want a box of chocolate. 953 00:47:22,160 --> 00:47:25,360 I'll buy the sugar free stuff if that's what it takes. 954 00:47:25,360 --> 00:47:27,120 But if you want something, tell me. 955 00:47:27,120 --> 00:47:29,600 If you don't want something, tell me. 956 00:47:29,600 --> 00:47:30,600 Yeah. 957 00:47:30,600 --> 00:47:32,480 You know, I'm dumb. 958 00:47:32,480 --> 00:47:33,480 Yeah. 959 00:47:33,480 --> 00:47:34,480 Communicate where you are. 960 00:47:34,480 --> 00:47:36,520 I mean, and we've learned that. 961 00:47:36,520 --> 00:47:37,520 Yeah. 962 00:47:37,520 --> 00:47:41,800 She's, she probably, you know, when she's had weak moments, she's had to tell me because 963 00:47:41,800 --> 00:47:43,640 I'm just assuming everything's fine. 964 00:47:43,640 --> 00:47:46,320 I don't pay attention to all the details. 965 00:47:46,320 --> 00:47:47,320 Yeah. 966 00:47:47,320 --> 00:47:50,000 I'm trying to, I guess, you know, I've heard this phrase many times. 967 00:47:50,000 --> 00:47:53,040 I'm trying to fly at 50,000 feet and see where I'm going. 968 00:47:53,040 --> 00:47:55,160 You know, I'm trying to find the next step. 969 00:47:55,160 --> 00:47:56,160 Yeah. 970 00:47:56,160 --> 00:47:57,160 So. 971 00:47:57,160 --> 00:48:03,800 But that's where we've talked about just today that transparency, having those real conversations, 972 00:48:03,800 --> 00:48:11,160 building those relationships is important because if I don't have that relationship 973 00:48:11,160 --> 00:48:16,360 with you or if I don't have that relationship with you, Dina or Luke, in regards to a friendship, 974 00:48:16,360 --> 00:48:19,800 Ramlee or whatever, you're not going to know. 975 00:48:19,800 --> 00:48:20,800 You're right. 976 00:48:20,800 --> 00:48:24,160 You're not going to know because I'm really good at hiding my hurt. 977 00:48:24,160 --> 00:48:26,600 I'm really good. 978 00:48:26,600 --> 00:48:33,000 I have become really good at being strong when I'm not. 979 00:48:33,000 --> 00:48:39,480 And then I expect people to be like, hello, I'm going through something. 980 00:48:39,480 --> 00:48:41,120 Why are you not helping me? 981 00:48:41,120 --> 00:48:47,160 Well, it's because I haven't been open enough and used arsenals that has been given to 982 00:48:47,160 --> 00:48:53,640 me, which is a voice that's part of our arsenal that God has given us. 983 00:48:53,640 --> 00:49:01,440 I don't use my voice enough to say, hey, Dina, I got rejected this week and it really stinks. 984 00:49:01,440 --> 00:49:02,440 Yeah. 985 00:49:02,440 --> 00:49:03,440 You actually did text me. 986 00:49:03,440 --> 00:49:06,440 I know that there's something better, but it stinks. 987 00:49:06,440 --> 00:49:07,440 Yeah. 988 00:49:07,440 --> 00:49:08,440 What do you got? 989 00:49:08,440 --> 00:49:09,440 You know, what do you got for me? 990 00:49:09,440 --> 00:49:14,440 Or sometimes the, oh my gosh, why are you having a breakdown? 991 00:49:14,440 --> 00:49:15,440 Where'd this come from? 992 00:49:15,440 --> 00:49:17,800 It's like, oh, it's been building for three weeks. 993 00:49:17,800 --> 00:49:18,800 Yes. 994 00:49:18,800 --> 00:49:19,800 Yeah. 995 00:49:19,800 --> 00:49:24,920 I just didn't tell you because I didn't want to burden you with the knowledge of my impending 996 00:49:24,920 --> 00:49:25,920 breakdown. 997 00:49:25,920 --> 00:49:26,920 Yeah. 998 00:49:26,920 --> 00:49:34,200 But then going back to, you were talking about us as a married couple, what we do to get 999 00:49:34,200 --> 00:49:40,000 through things and to build, you know, knowing our strengths and our weaknesses. 1000 00:49:40,000 --> 00:49:47,280 But we're also parents and it's important that as parents we keep our family unit strong 1001 00:49:47,280 --> 00:49:48,560 as well. 1002 00:49:48,560 --> 00:49:54,320 And so there will be times I will say, Hey, to our daughter, you need to go spend some 1003 00:49:54,320 --> 00:49:55,800 time with your dad. 1004 00:49:55,800 --> 00:50:01,840 So why don't you and your dad go do something, even if it's just outside working on his truck, 1005 00:50:01,840 --> 00:50:05,000 stop anything, just you need to spend some time with your dad. 1006 00:50:05,000 --> 00:50:06,960 You spend a lot of time with me. 1007 00:50:06,960 --> 00:50:10,200 I love you, but mom needs a break. 1008 00:50:10,200 --> 00:50:11,200 Yes. 1009 00:50:11,200 --> 00:50:12,200 Yes. 1010 00:50:12,200 --> 00:50:16,080 So go spend some time with dad because dad's going to teach you life skills that I can't 1011 00:50:16,080 --> 00:50:17,080 teach you. 1012 00:50:17,080 --> 00:50:18,080 Yeah. 1013 00:50:18,080 --> 00:50:24,680 And then when he's needs a break, so to speak, you'll come back to me and then to go out 1014 00:50:24,680 --> 00:50:26,560 and do things together. 1015 00:50:26,560 --> 00:50:27,560 Yes. 1016 00:50:27,560 --> 00:50:36,120 And that's important too, because I see too many kids every day who don't have that structure, 1017 00:50:36,120 --> 00:50:40,920 don't have that love, don't have that family support. 1018 00:50:40,920 --> 00:50:45,680 And to have a strong family, you've got to learn to do things together. 1019 00:50:45,680 --> 00:50:49,720 Even if I don't want to go to the trampoline park, I'm going to go to the trampoline park. 1020 00:50:49,720 --> 00:50:52,120 I heard the trampoline park a lot today. 1021 00:50:52,120 --> 00:50:57,680 Even if I don't want to go to Oceans of Fun because I do not like water parks, I will 1022 00:50:57,680 --> 00:50:58,680 go. 1023 00:50:58,680 --> 00:50:59,680 Good to know. 1024 00:50:59,680 --> 00:51:01,720 Sorry, there's no cameras in here, but my face says everything. 1025 00:51:01,720 --> 00:51:05,080 Sorry, I have no filter. 1026 00:51:05,080 --> 00:51:08,400 They're going to be building a new amusement park here in Kansas City. 1027 00:51:08,400 --> 00:51:11,640 Guys, this one, we are going to enjoy this one. 1028 00:51:11,640 --> 00:51:12,640 It's based on Mattel. 1029 00:51:12,640 --> 00:51:13,640 I saw that. 1030 00:51:13,640 --> 00:51:16,640 So it's like Hot Wheels and Barbie. 1031 00:51:16,640 --> 00:51:19,080 All the 70s and 80s babies. 1032 00:51:19,080 --> 00:51:20,080 I heard that. 1033 00:51:20,080 --> 00:51:22,320 I just didn't know how upfront it was. 1034 00:51:22,320 --> 00:51:25,320 That's our generation, babe. 1035 00:51:25,320 --> 00:51:26,320 I'm so stoked. 1036 00:51:26,320 --> 00:51:31,240 Because they know that we're the ones that have the money now. 1037 00:51:31,240 --> 00:51:34,600 You have to strengthen your family too, and that means you're going to have to build relationships 1038 00:51:34,600 --> 00:51:36,680 with your family members and do things. 1039 00:51:36,680 --> 00:51:37,680 Yes. 1040 00:51:37,680 --> 00:51:39,600 And keep that family unit strong. 1041 00:51:39,600 --> 00:51:44,600 I remember our neighbor next door coming out and we were putting brakes on my brother-in-law's 1042 00:51:44,600 --> 00:51:45,600 car. 1043 00:51:45,600 --> 00:51:47,600 And Lee was six. 1044 00:51:47,600 --> 00:51:48,600 Probably. 1045 00:51:48,600 --> 00:51:54,520 And I got the car all jacked up on blocks, and I got the tires off, and she's covered 1046 00:51:54,520 --> 00:51:56,320 in grease from head to toe. 1047 00:51:56,320 --> 00:51:57,320 That's awesome. 1048 00:51:57,320 --> 00:51:59,800 Putting brakes on, and I'm showing her where everything goes. 1049 00:51:59,800 --> 00:52:04,520 And the neighbor goes, you really shouldn't have her under that car. 1050 00:52:04,520 --> 00:52:09,120 And I said, I promise you, by the time she's a teenager, she'll probably be building motors 1051 00:52:09,120 --> 00:52:10,120 in this yard. 1052 00:52:10,120 --> 00:52:15,960 Of course, I was being sarcastic, but I was thinking back when I was a kid. 1053 00:52:15,960 --> 00:52:17,960 Those moments meant something. 1054 00:52:17,960 --> 00:52:18,960 Yeah. 1055 00:52:18,960 --> 00:52:22,440 And I want her to feel confident. 1056 00:52:22,440 --> 00:52:23,440 She has a flat tire. 1057 00:52:23,440 --> 00:52:24,440 I want her to be able to change it. 1058 00:52:24,440 --> 00:52:25,440 Come on. 1059 00:52:25,440 --> 00:52:31,960 If she has something that she needs to get done, she'll be able to take care of it. 1060 00:52:31,960 --> 00:52:36,360 Or even if she doesn't know how to take care of it, she knows... 1061 00:52:36,360 --> 00:52:37,640 She knows how to get help. 1062 00:52:37,640 --> 00:52:38,640 Yeah. 1063 00:52:38,640 --> 00:52:40,080 She knows Dad can fix it. 1064 00:52:40,080 --> 00:52:42,240 I mean, that was me. 1065 00:52:42,240 --> 00:52:43,240 Dad can fix anything. 1066 00:52:43,240 --> 00:52:44,240 Yeah. 1067 00:52:44,240 --> 00:52:48,920 And I remember that always was under the hood with my dad, my stepdad. 1068 00:52:48,920 --> 00:52:50,880 And he was a lot like your dad. 1069 00:52:50,880 --> 00:52:51,880 So it's like... 1070 00:52:51,880 --> 00:52:55,760 And you see Luke's woodworking tools in the garage and all of the things, right? 1071 00:52:55,760 --> 00:52:58,720 And it's like, I was always surrounded by that. 1072 00:52:58,720 --> 00:53:07,680 But what it put inside of me was even if I don't know how to change that or fix that 1073 00:53:07,680 --> 00:53:14,760 or whatever, I know enough to keep me out of trouble or... 1074 00:53:14,760 --> 00:53:17,160 And I know enough to make me dangerous. 1075 00:53:17,160 --> 00:53:18,760 You know what I mean? 1076 00:53:18,760 --> 00:53:24,040 And in a good way, because it's always that feeling of somebody taking advantage of you 1077 00:53:24,040 --> 00:53:25,280 or something of that nature. 1078 00:53:25,280 --> 00:53:28,840 And you can just stand back and say, no, well, this is what this needs. 1079 00:53:28,840 --> 00:53:31,400 No, no, I don't think so. 1080 00:53:31,400 --> 00:53:32,400 But thank you for your time. 1081 00:53:32,400 --> 00:53:33,400 And it does. 1082 00:53:33,400 --> 00:53:38,400 It creates, like you said, it creates a confidence inside of our children. 1083 00:53:38,400 --> 00:53:43,080 And it also places a space because you guys do have this really great relationship with 1084 00:53:43,080 --> 00:53:44,080 your daughter. 1085 00:53:44,080 --> 00:53:51,120 And Luke and I have talked about this too, that you guys have created a space that even 1086 00:53:51,120 --> 00:53:57,320 if she does get in a bind, when she gets in a bind, because again, life happens, she knows 1087 00:53:57,320 --> 00:54:02,120 that she has a relationship that she can come to mom and dad. 1088 00:54:02,120 --> 00:54:06,880 And that's something that Luke and I are constantly in that space of, babe, do you know that I'm 1089 00:54:06,880 --> 00:54:09,640 a safe person for you? 1090 00:54:09,640 --> 00:54:14,040 You know, hey, husband, hey, wife, that's listening right now. 1091 00:54:14,040 --> 00:54:21,240 Are you a safe person for your spouse to fall down and fall apart right there at your... 1092 00:54:21,240 --> 00:54:23,080 Babe, I got caught in this. 1093 00:54:23,080 --> 00:54:24,080 Babe, I did this. 1094 00:54:24,080 --> 00:54:25,080 Babe, I... 1095 00:54:25,080 --> 00:54:26,080 You know what I mean? 1096 00:54:26,080 --> 00:54:27,200 Whatever it was. 1097 00:54:27,200 --> 00:54:32,800 Even with all the presets and everything involved, this is what happened. 1098 00:54:32,800 --> 00:54:34,640 Are you still a safe person? 1099 00:54:34,640 --> 00:54:39,720 Are you somebody that says, we're going to fight through this together? 1100 00:54:39,720 --> 00:54:43,600 We're going to link arms together and we're going to say, this will not take us down, 1101 00:54:43,600 --> 00:54:49,800 but it will take us further and higher and above and beyond what the enemy made to evil. 1102 00:54:49,800 --> 00:54:52,120 God is going to get the glory in the midst of this. 1103 00:54:52,120 --> 00:54:58,200 You know, and it's having those presets too, because it's not just, I won't do certain 1104 00:54:58,200 --> 00:55:04,480 things, but it's just in case something happens and it may not inadvertently, however it went 1105 00:55:04,480 --> 00:55:06,200 down or just there's... 1106 00:55:06,200 --> 00:55:12,320 We're frail humans that are weak at times in saying, or even looking at your spouse 1107 00:55:12,320 --> 00:55:16,560 and saying, I'm struggling right now, like right here. 1108 00:55:16,560 --> 00:55:18,960 Can you help me? 1109 00:55:18,960 --> 00:55:25,080 And in being transparent and being vulnerable enough to say, it's okay for me, not just 1110 00:55:25,080 --> 00:55:30,680 as the wife, but the husband to the wife too, to be weak in front of each other. 1111 00:55:30,680 --> 00:55:35,840 I like what you had said though, John, as far as like, not just knowing your spouse's 1112 00:55:35,840 --> 00:55:43,120 strengths, but knowing their weaknesses and learning how to build onto those things. 1113 00:55:43,120 --> 00:55:46,240 Because we tease with you all the time. 1114 00:55:46,240 --> 00:55:47,280 We adore you, man. 1115 00:55:47,280 --> 00:55:48,280 We really do. 1116 00:55:48,280 --> 00:55:49,280 Sure, sure. 1117 00:55:49,280 --> 00:55:50,280 You're... 1118 00:55:50,280 --> 00:55:51,280 You're great people. 1119 00:55:51,280 --> 00:55:53,400 You really are a good little brother. 1120 00:55:53,400 --> 00:55:54,400 Because I do. 1121 00:55:54,400 --> 00:55:55,960 I have to remind myself that we're the older ones. 1122 00:55:55,960 --> 00:55:56,960 Yeah, we are. 1123 00:55:56,960 --> 00:55:57,960 Sure. 1124 00:55:57,960 --> 00:55:58,960 Yes. 1125 00:55:58,960 --> 00:55:59,960 Not by much. 1126 00:55:59,960 --> 00:56:02,120 These two are babies, but not by much. 1127 00:56:02,120 --> 00:56:03,120 Yeah. 1128 00:56:03,120 --> 00:56:04,920 But you guys have such wisdom, right? 1129 00:56:04,920 --> 00:56:07,040 You guys walk in such wisdom. 1130 00:56:07,040 --> 00:56:13,800 And it is, it's one of those where you guys compliment each other so beautifully. 1131 00:56:13,800 --> 00:56:15,680 Thank you. 1132 00:56:15,680 --> 00:56:16,680 You really do. 1133 00:56:16,680 --> 00:56:17,680 Thank you. 1134 00:56:17,680 --> 00:56:21,120 And as many times as I always laugh and say, I would kick you in the head at this point. 1135 00:56:21,120 --> 00:56:22,120 It's just that simple. 1136 00:56:22,120 --> 00:56:23,120 Talking to John, not Tracy. 1137 00:56:23,120 --> 00:56:24,120 Tracy's my girl. 1138 00:56:24,120 --> 00:56:25,120 Of course, it's me. 1139 00:56:25,120 --> 00:56:36,640 But it is, to see the strengths and how you guys just balance each other and how you allow 1140 00:56:36,640 --> 00:56:42,480 the Holy Spirit ebb and flow through the two of you, it's encouraging. 1141 00:56:42,480 --> 00:56:47,000 I want, I personally, Luke and I personally want to encourage you guys. 1142 00:56:47,000 --> 00:56:51,240 Because we do get, we have gotten a chance to sit in spaces with you guys that other 1143 00:56:51,240 --> 00:56:53,560 people may not get to see. 1144 00:56:53,560 --> 00:56:56,520 And you guys are the real deal. 1145 00:56:56,520 --> 00:56:59,520 You guys are the real deal. 1146 00:56:59,520 --> 00:57:02,240 Who you say you are is who you are. 1147 00:57:02,240 --> 00:57:03,640 You guys aren't trying to sugarcoat it. 1148 00:57:03,640 --> 00:57:06,360 You're not trying to bank yourself bigger than what you are. 1149 00:57:06,360 --> 00:57:10,800 You guys literally are just, you are literally the goodness of God. 1150 00:57:10,800 --> 00:57:12,760 And we appreciate you guys very much. 1151 00:57:12,760 --> 00:57:14,600 Thank you. 1152 00:57:14,600 --> 00:57:16,360 So as we're going to wrap up. 1153 00:57:16,360 --> 00:57:26,560 I'm going to look to you, John and Tracy, any parting wisdom, practical tips for couples, 1154 00:57:26,560 --> 00:57:33,880 for couples that are in ministry, couples that are raising teenagers, anything practical 1155 00:57:33,880 --> 00:57:38,040 that y'all would like to pass on that you haven't already shared? 1156 00:57:38,040 --> 00:57:43,280 Well, the whole teenager thing, I'm still working out, so I can't really answer or give 1157 00:57:43,280 --> 00:57:44,760 wisdom on that. 1158 00:57:44,760 --> 00:57:47,440 I'm not that one. 1159 00:57:47,440 --> 00:57:53,040 But I would have to say keep dating your spouse. 1160 00:57:53,040 --> 00:58:00,240 I'm still after 18 years learning more and more about him. 1161 00:58:00,240 --> 00:58:08,340 And then that respect for him is growing each passing moment. 1162 00:58:08,340 --> 00:58:18,480 So date your spouse, fall in love with them over and over again, even in the aggravating 1163 00:58:18,480 --> 00:58:21,400 times that will come, because they will. 1164 00:58:21,400 --> 00:58:22,680 They will come. 1165 00:58:22,680 --> 00:58:25,360 You will get mad at your spouse. 1166 00:58:25,360 --> 00:58:29,640 And like I've said before, how are you going to handle it? 1167 00:58:29,640 --> 00:58:30,640 That's good. 1168 00:58:30,640 --> 00:58:31,640 Yeah. 1169 00:58:31,640 --> 00:58:36,920 Are you going to be a bigger person and be forgiving? 1170 00:58:36,920 --> 00:58:42,800 Try and find a bigger picture, because your spouse is going to make a mistake. 1171 00:58:42,800 --> 00:58:46,280 Whether it's small or big, they're going to make a mistake. 1172 00:58:46,280 --> 00:58:50,520 So keep loving them, keep forgiving them. 1173 00:58:50,520 --> 00:58:51,520 Don't stay angry. 1174 00:58:51,520 --> 00:58:52,520 Come on. 1175 00:58:52,520 --> 00:58:58,880 Because that's another window for Satan to the enemy to, and we give him way too much 1176 00:58:58,880 --> 00:59:06,080 credit, but that is another window and avenue that he is going to use against you because 1177 00:59:06,080 --> 00:59:11,440 he has tried to use that against us, is our anger towards one another. 1178 00:59:11,440 --> 00:59:16,520 And it wasn't pretty. 1179 00:59:16,520 --> 00:59:20,520 Just because you think I'm mad doesn't mean I'm mad. 1180 00:59:20,520 --> 00:59:21,520 Okay. 1181 00:59:21,520 --> 00:59:22,520 What's your words of wisdom now? 1182 00:59:22,520 --> 00:59:27,160 Oh, I don't know that I have really any words of wisdom. 1183 00:59:27,160 --> 00:59:32,240 I'm learning every day how to be a husband, how to be a father. 1184 00:59:32,240 --> 00:59:36,360 And with that, I guess I'm keeping God the center of my attention, the focus of my affection 1185 00:59:36,360 --> 00:59:41,360 and the main attraction of my life, the best that I can. 1186 00:59:41,360 --> 00:59:47,920 If we do that with God and He's making us His bride, what would it be like if we did 1187 00:59:47,920 --> 00:59:49,920 that with our wife? 1188 00:59:49,920 --> 00:59:52,920 Shoot, sir. 1189 00:59:52,920 --> 00:59:55,040 Yep. 1190 00:59:55,040 --> 00:59:58,040 This is why we brought him down. 1191 00:59:58,040 --> 01:00:00,040 It's true. 1192 01:00:00,040 --> 01:00:01,040 Dude. 1193 01:00:01,040 --> 01:00:02,040 Yeah. 1194 01:00:02,040 --> 01:00:03,040 Enough said. 1195 01:00:03,040 --> 01:00:04,040 I love that. 1196 01:00:04,040 --> 01:00:05,040 Yeah. 1197 01:00:05,040 --> 01:00:06,040 We love you guys. 1198 01:00:06,040 --> 01:00:07,040 We love you. 1199 01:00:07,040 --> 01:00:08,040 We love you too. 1200 01:00:08,040 --> 01:00:09,040 Thank you for having us. 1201 01:00:09,040 --> 01:00:10,040 Thanks for coming. 1202 01:00:10,040 --> 01:00:11,040 Thanks for talking with us. 1203 01:00:11,040 --> 01:00:12,040 I mean, they kind of didn't have a choice. 1204 01:00:12,040 --> 01:00:13,040 They really didn't. 1205 01:00:13,040 --> 01:00:14,040 No, we didn't. 1206 01:00:14,040 --> 01:00:15,040 No. 1207 01:00:15,040 --> 01:00:16,040 I mean, not that we had them. 1208 01:00:16,040 --> 01:00:19,040 Was this payment for sleeping on your bed? 1209 01:00:19,040 --> 01:00:20,040 Maybe. 1210 01:00:20,040 --> 01:00:21,040 All right, guys. 1211 01:00:21,040 --> 01:00:22,040 You have the best week. 1212 01:00:22,040 --> 01:00:41,040 Enjoy the journey.