1
00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:03,000
Time to get ready for the Larry and Needles show.

2
00:00:03,000 --> 00:00:07,000
Is it hot?

3
00:00:07,000 --> 00:00:10,000
Is it hot?

4
00:00:10,000 --> 00:00:13,000
Is it hot?

5
00:00:13,000 --> 00:00:15,000
Is it hot?

6
00:00:15,000 --> 00:00:18,000
Just to check the mic or not, will it be hot?

7
00:00:18,000 --> 00:00:20,000
Yeah.

8
00:00:20,000 --> 00:00:23,000
Jesus, you're a stumbling fool.

9
00:00:23,000 --> 00:00:26,000
Alright, here we are.

10
00:00:26,000 --> 00:00:30,000
Welcome to the Larry and Needles show. I'm Larry.

11
00:00:30,000 --> 00:00:32,000
I'm Needles.

12
00:00:32,000 --> 00:00:35,000
Larry just does what he wants.

13
00:00:35,000 --> 00:00:37,000
We're all in Larry's world.

14
00:00:37,000 --> 00:00:38,000
Oh, man.

15
00:00:38,000 --> 00:00:41,000
What? Ah, fuck, I forgot my notes.

16
00:00:41,000 --> 00:00:43,000
Ah, fuck me, man.

17
00:00:43,000 --> 00:00:45,000
This guy's got notes.

18
00:00:45,000 --> 00:00:47,000
Well, I'll tell you.

19
00:00:47,000 --> 00:00:51,000
We got a couple episodes in the bag and

20
00:00:51,000 --> 00:00:55,000
we're just about to go live because by the time you hear this,

21
00:00:55,000 --> 00:00:57,000
you might have already heard us live,

22
00:00:57,000 --> 00:00:59,000
but we just figured everything out.

23
00:00:59,000 --> 00:01:01,000
We're kind of excited.

24
00:01:01,000 --> 00:01:03,000
We're two fucking druggies that really are idiots.

25
00:01:03,000 --> 00:01:05,000
It's our drugs.

26
00:01:05,000 --> 00:01:07,000
It's our fucking shield of coat of arms.

27
00:01:07,000 --> 00:01:10,000
It's amazing that we're going to be able to get this shit off the ground

28
00:01:10,000 --> 00:01:13,000
and it's probably going to be hopefully pretty good listening.

29
00:01:13,000 --> 00:01:15,000
I really don't care.

30
00:01:15,000 --> 00:01:18,000
I just want to fucking tell Larry he's gay and I want to laugh at him.

31
00:01:18,000 --> 00:01:20,000
That's all that I want to do.

32
00:01:20,000 --> 00:01:22,000
There's nothing wrong with that, right Larry?

33
00:01:22,000 --> 00:01:23,000
What was that?

34
00:01:23,000 --> 00:01:25,000
That was hilarious.

35
00:01:25,000 --> 00:01:27,000
Yeah, it's very funny.

36
00:01:27,000 --> 00:01:29,000
That's why you giggled after you said it.

37
00:01:29,000 --> 00:01:31,000
So, I'm going to give you a situation.

38
00:01:31,000 --> 00:01:33,000
Tell me what you think about this.

39
00:01:33,000 --> 00:01:35,000
You tell me, man.

40
00:01:35,000 --> 00:01:37,000
You're a gambler.

41
00:01:37,000 --> 00:01:39,000
No.

42
00:01:39,000 --> 00:01:41,000
Oh, it's a situation.

43
00:01:41,000 --> 00:01:43,000
I see, I see.

44
00:01:43,000 --> 00:01:45,000
I already forgot what's going on.

45
00:01:45,000 --> 00:01:47,000
No, it's not even four seconds.

46
00:01:47,000 --> 00:01:49,000
I thought you were asking me that question.

47
00:01:49,000 --> 00:01:51,000
It's not even four seconds.

48
00:01:51,000 --> 00:01:53,000
I'm going to give you a situation.

49
00:01:53,000 --> 00:01:55,000
Fucking Larry.

50
00:01:55,000 --> 00:01:57,000
So, you're a gambler.

51
00:01:57,000 --> 00:01:59,000
Yes, okay.

52
00:01:59,000 --> 00:02:01,000
And you live in Vegas.

53
00:02:01,000 --> 00:02:03,000
I love it there.

54
00:02:03,000 --> 00:02:05,000
It's so beautiful.

55
00:02:05,000 --> 00:02:09,000
You get very upset with the casino because they don't give you perks like they used to.

56
00:02:09,000 --> 00:02:11,000
They're cutting back.

57
00:02:11,000 --> 00:02:13,000
Because in your eyes, you're a high roller.

58
00:02:13,000 --> 00:02:15,000
Right.

59
00:02:15,000 --> 00:02:17,000
So, all of a sudden,

60
00:02:17,000 --> 00:02:19,000
you know,

61
00:02:19,000 --> 00:02:21,000
you get mad

62
00:02:21,000 --> 00:02:23,000
because they're not giving you perks.

63
00:02:23,000 --> 00:02:25,000
But who do you get mad at?

64
00:02:25,000 --> 00:02:27,000
The casino?

65
00:02:27,000 --> 00:02:29,000
The casino's not giving you perks, right?

66
00:02:29,000 --> 00:02:31,000
No.

67
00:02:31,000 --> 00:02:33,000
It's the waitress.

68
00:02:33,000 --> 00:02:35,000
Well, not the waitress, but you get mad at the casino.

69
00:02:35,000 --> 00:02:37,000
They're diminishing.

70
00:02:37,000 --> 00:02:39,000
They're tightening up.

71
00:02:39,000 --> 00:02:41,000
They're cheap skates.

72
00:02:41,000 --> 00:02:43,000
You're spending a lot of cash here.

73
00:02:43,000 --> 00:02:45,000
So...

74
00:02:45,000 --> 00:02:47,000
All of my kids' college fucking tuition.

75
00:02:47,000 --> 00:02:49,000
The car, the house.

76
00:02:49,000 --> 00:02:51,000
What's your game, Larry Roulette?

77
00:02:51,000 --> 00:02:53,000
Yeah, everything I...

78
00:02:53,000 --> 00:02:55,000
I hope so.

79
00:02:55,000 --> 00:02:57,000
It puts the gun in the mouth.

80
00:02:59,000 --> 00:03:01,000
Russian Roulette with a magazine.

81
00:03:01,000 --> 00:03:03,000
I mean, you can't have that in a casino though.

82
00:03:03,000 --> 00:03:05,000
Maybe in Thailand.

83
00:03:05,000 --> 00:03:07,000
Definitely.

84
00:03:07,000 --> 00:03:09,000
Somewhere where it goes.

85
00:03:09,000 --> 00:03:11,000
So, you're very mad at the casino because...

86
00:03:11,000 --> 00:03:13,000
They're not giving me drinks and sandwiches.

87
00:03:13,000 --> 00:03:15,000
Well, it's not even that.

88
00:03:15,000 --> 00:03:17,000
It's no more perks, no more rooms.

89
00:03:17,000 --> 00:03:19,000
Yeah, everything.

90
00:03:19,000 --> 00:03:21,000
You're cutting back.

91
00:03:21,000 --> 00:03:23,000
So, guess what you do?

92
00:03:23,000 --> 00:03:25,000
Instead of getting mad at the casino,

93
00:03:25,000 --> 00:03:27,000
you climb up

94
00:03:27,000 --> 00:03:29,000
and I don't know the room number,

95
00:03:29,000 --> 00:03:31,000
and you

96
00:03:31,000 --> 00:03:33,000
bust the window out,

97
00:03:33,000 --> 00:03:35,000
and you kill

98
00:03:35,000 --> 00:03:37,000
60 people.

99
00:03:37,000 --> 00:03:39,000
Right.

100
00:03:39,000 --> 00:03:41,000
And 867 people

101
00:03:41,000 --> 00:03:43,000
are injured.

102
00:03:43,000 --> 00:03:45,000
411 of those

103
00:03:45,000 --> 00:03:47,000
867 people

104
00:03:47,000 --> 00:03:49,000
are injured by gunfire.

105
00:03:49,000 --> 00:03:51,000
Right.

106
00:03:51,000 --> 00:03:53,000
Do you know who I'm talking about?

107
00:03:53,000 --> 00:03:55,000
Yeah, the Vegas shooter.

108
00:03:55,000 --> 00:03:57,000
What's his name?

109
00:03:57,000 --> 00:03:59,000
I don't know his name.

110
00:03:59,000 --> 00:04:01,000
Stevie Paddock.

111
00:04:01,000 --> 00:04:03,000
But not because he was mad at the casino, man.

112
00:04:03,000 --> 00:04:05,000
That was the government plan.

113
00:04:05,000 --> 00:04:07,000
The FBI came out and said

114
00:04:07,000 --> 00:04:09,000
that Stevie Paddock

115
00:04:09,000 --> 00:04:11,000
shot this country music festival

116
00:04:11,000 --> 00:04:13,000
and they stopped giving him his perks.

117
00:04:13,000 --> 00:04:15,000
At the casino.

118
00:04:15,000 --> 00:04:17,000
I don't believe that. I think the FBI is full of shit, man.

119
00:04:17,000 --> 00:04:19,000
Larry, you fucking don't think.

120
00:04:19,000 --> 00:04:21,000
I just saw, I just literally was scrolling through the man.

121
00:04:21,000 --> 00:04:23,000
Man, it's so fucking crazy.

122
00:04:23,000 --> 00:04:25,000
Isn't that a ass of mine?

123
00:04:25,000 --> 00:04:27,000
Oh my God.

124
00:04:27,000 --> 00:04:29,000
60 people. It's the biggest mass shooting

125
00:04:29,000 --> 00:04:31,000
in the United States,

126
00:04:31,000 --> 00:04:33,000
and nobody says anything about it.

127
00:04:33,000 --> 00:04:35,000
Isn't that something?

128
00:04:35,000 --> 00:04:37,000
It's why I brought it up today.

129
00:04:37,000 --> 00:04:39,000
For a week, they say Vegas strong on TV

130
00:04:39,000 --> 00:04:41,000
and they say,

131
00:04:41,000 --> 00:04:43,000
I'm not sure.

132
00:04:43,000 --> 00:04:45,000
And then that's it.

133
00:04:45,000 --> 00:04:47,000
But when is the last time you heard about this?

134
00:04:47,000 --> 00:04:49,000
When it happened.

135
00:04:49,000 --> 00:04:51,000
867 people injured.

136
00:04:51,000 --> 00:04:53,000
Yeah.

137
00:04:53,000 --> 00:04:55,000
I know towns smaller than that.

138
00:04:55,000 --> 00:04:57,000
40 minutes and 1.50.

139
00:04:57,000 --> 00:04:59,000
And I can't remember the guy that was singing at the time.

140
00:04:59,000 --> 00:05:01,000
It was a country music festival.

141
00:05:01,000 --> 00:05:03,000
It was a country guy.

142
00:05:03,000 --> 00:05:05,000
And I never heard of his fucking name before that.

143
00:05:05,000 --> 00:05:07,000
But boy, that sure skyrocketed him in the fame.

144
00:05:07,000 --> 00:05:09,000
He sold words for a fucking day or two.

145
00:05:09,000 --> 00:05:11,000
If he was singing something about America, then yeah, definitely.

146
00:05:11,000 --> 00:05:13,000
It didn't matter.

147
00:05:13,000 --> 00:05:15,000
You heard his name over and over.

148
00:05:15,000 --> 00:05:17,000
I don't remember Stephen Panik.

149
00:05:17,000 --> 00:05:19,000
I don't remember it either because my mind is fucking scrambled.

150
00:05:19,000 --> 00:05:21,000
But isn't that ass of mine that these fucking people say

151
00:05:21,000 --> 00:05:23,000
that he was disgruntled

152
00:05:23,000 --> 00:05:25,000
because of his perks got taken away?

153
00:05:25,000 --> 00:05:27,000
That is fucking crazy.

154
00:05:27,000 --> 00:05:29,000
The fucking guy lived in Vegas too.

155
00:05:29,000 --> 00:05:31,000
So I mean, what kind of perks do you need?

156
00:05:31,000 --> 00:05:33,000
You have a house.

157
00:05:33,000 --> 00:05:35,000
Exactly.

158
00:05:35,000 --> 00:05:37,000
You have a home.

159
00:05:37,000 --> 00:05:39,000
Bring the fucking prostitute home.

160
00:05:39,000 --> 00:05:41,000
Well, no.

161
00:05:41,000 --> 00:05:43,000
He had like an Asian wife.

162
00:05:43,000 --> 00:05:45,000
Oh, nice.

163
00:05:45,000 --> 00:05:47,000
Hey, you gonna spark that or what? Do you have another jib?

164
00:05:47,000 --> 00:05:49,000
I'm looking for a lighter, man.

165
00:05:49,000 --> 00:05:51,000
Okay, would he use the fucking crack baby mobile?

166
00:05:51,000 --> 00:05:53,000
Nah, I'm looking for.

167
00:05:53,000 --> 00:05:55,000
It's right there, dude.

168
00:05:55,000 --> 00:05:57,000
But I mean, do you think this guy really

169
00:05:57,000 --> 00:05:59,000
shoots up and kills all those people?

170
00:05:59,000 --> 00:06:01,000
To get the listeners at home an idea of the

171
00:06:01,000 --> 00:06:03,000
lighter.

172
00:06:03,000 --> 00:06:05,000
It's not a crack either.

173
00:06:05,000 --> 00:06:07,000
We can if we want.

174
00:06:07,000 --> 00:06:09,000
Jesus, you gotta have some context in that.

175
00:06:09,000 --> 00:06:11,000
But if you look at the videos of it,

176
00:06:11,000 --> 00:06:13,000
there's actually videos of shit.

177
00:06:13,000 --> 00:06:15,000
Have you ever watched it?

178
00:06:15,000 --> 00:06:17,000
Yes, I have.

179
00:06:17,000 --> 00:06:19,000
But here's the other thing, man.

180
00:06:19,000 --> 00:06:21,000
How the fuck did this guy

181
00:06:21,000 --> 00:06:23,000
get duffel bags full of guns

182
00:06:23,000 --> 00:06:25,000
up into that room?

183
00:06:25,000 --> 00:06:27,000
He did get duffel bags, but there's no video.

184
00:06:27,000 --> 00:06:29,000
No, I know because it's all bullshit.

185
00:06:29,000 --> 00:06:31,000
Because it's all fucking bullshit.

186
00:06:31,000 --> 00:06:33,000
He was an FBI plant.

187
00:06:33,000 --> 00:06:35,000
They wanted that

188
00:06:35,000 --> 00:06:37,000
fear.

189
00:06:37,000 --> 00:06:39,000
You say he's like Jack Ruby?

190
00:06:39,000 --> 00:06:41,000
Yeah.

191
00:06:41,000 --> 00:06:43,000
Or whoever was in the grass, you know.

192
00:06:43,000 --> 00:06:45,000
Exactly.

193
00:06:45,000 --> 00:06:47,000
Allegedly.

194
00:06:47,000 --> 00:06:49,000
And this guy allegedly fucking pulls

195
00:06:49,000 --> 00:06:51,000
all that shit up into that room.

196
00:06:51,000 --> 00:06:53,000
No one notices.

197
00:06:53,000 --> 00:06:55,000
People did notice.

198
00:06:55,000 --> 00:06:57,000
Come on, man. Don't be a fucking and ass clown.

199
00:06:57,000 --> 00:06:59,000
First of all,

200
00:06:59,000 --> 00:07:01,000
there were so many conspiracy theories

201
00:07:01,000 --> 00:07:03,000
about this. Like it was a bad arms deal.

202
00:07:03,000 --> 00:07:05,000
It was all

203
00:07:05,000 --> 00:07:07,000
set up in...

204
00:07:07,000 --> 00:07:09,000
What do you mean a bad arms deal?

205
00:07:09,000 --> 00:07:11,000
Well, this guy was selling guns

206
00:07:11,000 --> 00:07:13,000
to somebody, and that's why he brought them all

207
00:07:13,000 --> 00:07:15,000
up there.

208
00:07:15,000 --> 00:07:17,000
And then...

209
00:07:17,000 --> 00:07:19,000
Because they have video of him bringing all the guns up.

210
00:07:19,000 --> 00:07:21,000
And then the deal didn't go down?

211
00:07:21,000 --> 00:07:23,000
I don't think it was enough

212
00:07:23,000 --> 00:07:25,000
weapons for it to be an arms deal.

213
00:07:25,000 --> 00:07:27,000
First of all, if you're gonna kill people,

214
00:07:27,000 --> 00:07:29,000
you only need one gun

215
00:07:29,000 --> 00:07:31,000
and a lot of ammo.

216
00:07:31,000 --> 00:07:33,000
Yeah.

217
00:07:33,000 --> 00:07:35,000
But he's got duffel bags.

218
00:07:35,000 --> 00:07:37,000
That's who they prey on.

219
00:07:37,000 --> 00:07:39,000
That's the MK Ultra Praise.

220
00:07:39,000 --> 00:07:41,000
And you know what, though?

221
00:07:41,000 --> 00:07:43,000
The way that the government sweeps

222
00:07:43,000 --> 00:07:45,000
things under the rug,

223
00:07:45,000 --> 00:07:47,000
and we're all just lemmings and fucking bump

224
00:07:47,000 --> 00:07:49,000
into the wall, and then turn around

225
00:07:49,000 --> 00:07:51,000
and bump into each other,

226
00:07:51,000 --> 00:07:53,000
like that's how it is, we just bounce bullshit off

227
00:07:53,000 --> 00:07:55,000
and jump.

228
00:07:55,000 --> 00:07:57,000
It's crazy. It is not crazy.

229
00:07:57,000 --> 00:07:59,000
Neato's if I fucking say it's crazy, it's crazy.

230
00:07:59,000 --> 00:08:01,000
It's not crazy Larry, you're crazy.

231
00:08:01,000 --> 00:08:03,000
The whole system is crazy Larry.

232
00:08:03,000 --> 00:08:05,000
It is fucking crazy.

233
00:08:05,000 --> 00:08:07,000
But the crazy is we just accept it.

234
00:08:07,000 --> 00:08:09,000
Yeah, that's the fucked up part.

235
00:08:09,000 --> 00:08:11,000
That's the crazy part is that

236
00:08:11,000 --> 00:08:13,000
we just don't fucking fight

237
00:08:13,000 --> 00:08:15,000
against it, but we really can't.

238
00:08:15,000 --> 00:08:17,000
Well, no.

239
00:08:17,000 --> 00:08:19,000
Well here's the thing, we can't because

240
00:08:19,000 --> 00:08:21,000
so many of the people

241
00:08:21,000 --> 00:08:23,000
believe the bullshit

242
00:08:23,000 --> 00:08:25,000
that when you tell them about it,

243
00:08:25,000 --> 00:08:27,000
they actually do think you're crazy.

244
00:08:27,000 --> 00:08:29,000
They think you're fucking nuts.

245
00:08:29,000 --> 00:08:31,000
Well, the media plays a big part in this also.

246
00:08:31,000 --> 00:08:33,000
Yeah, the propaganda media.

247
00:08:33,000 --> 00:08:35,000
Well, yes.

248
00:08:35,000 --> 00:08:37,000
I remember when,

249
00:08:37,000 --> 00:08:39,000
I've said this before and I'll say it again,

250
00:08:39,000 --> 00:08:41,000
news was news.

251
00:08:41,000 --> 00:08:43,000
It wasn't fucking 24 hour day cycle.

252
00:08:43,000 --> 00:08:45,000
Right, they told you facts and then they moved on.

253
00:08:45,000 --> 00:08:47,000
And then now they're all talking heads,

254
00:08:47,000 --> 00:08:49,000
which I love the talking heads.

255
00:08:49,000 --> 00:08:51,000
Not those kinds.

256
00:08:51,000 --> 00:08:53,000
They're like, I'm gonna get some titties

257
00:08:53,000 --> 00:08:55,000
in a fucking red dress.

258
00:08:55,000 --> 00:08:57,000
I'll watch it. Me too.

259
00:08:57,000 --> 00:08:59,000
Oh, Fox News, come on.

260
00:08:59,000 --> 00:09:01,000
That's why they call it Fox.

261
00:09:01,000 --> 00:09:03,000
Foxes.

262
00:09:03,000 --> 00:09:05,000
They are Fox News men.

263
00:09:05,000 --> 00:09:07,000
But isn't it crazy that we just accept

264
00:09:07,000 --> 00:09:09,000
what's going on?

265
00:09:09,000 --> 00:09:11,000
Like there's no medium.

266
00:09:11,000 --> 00:09:13,000
We're all extreme.

267
00:09:13,000 --> 00:09:15,000
It's either fucking 100% or nothing.

268
00:09:15,000 --> 00:09:17,000
The news just berates your ears.

269
00:09:17,000 --> 00:09:19,000
You know, there's nothing good.

270
00:09:19,000 --> 00:09:21,000
They won't get their ratings.

271
00:09:21,000 --> 00:09:23,000
If they don't have the endless scare tactic going.

272
00:09:23,000 --> 00:09:25,000
It's all about ratings, right?

273
00:09:25,000 --> 00:09:27,000
Yeah.

274
00:09:27,000 --> 00:09:29,000
Like even for us.

275
00:09:29,000 --> 00:09:31,000
And it's also all about the fear too.

276
00:09:31,000 --> 00:09:33,000
They put this guy in Vegas.

277
00:09:33,000 --> 00:09:35,000
They haven't shoot up a fucking crowd of country people.

278
00:09:35,000 --> 00:09:37,000
Because they know that all those country people

279
00:09:37,000 --> 00:09:39,000
are fucking

280
00:09:39,000 --> 00:09:41,000
mega people probably.

281
00:09:41,000 --> 00:09:43,000
Let me read this again.

282
00:09:43,000 --> 00:09:45,000
Wait, stop.

283
00:09:45,000 --> 00:09:47,000
867 people injured.

284
00:09:47,000 --> 00:09:49,000
Yeah.

285
00:09:49,000 --> 00:09:51,000
So listen, they shoot up the country

286
00:09:51,000 --> 00:09:53,000
concert because they know that people

287
00:09:53,000 --> 00:09:55,000
are probably fucking

288
00:09:55,000 --> 00:09:57,000
not left fucking wing.

289
00:09:57,000 --> 00:09:59,000
Oh, Larry, you're too into it.

290
00:09:59,000 --> 00:10:01,000
Well, no, you know, and then

291
00:10:01,000 --> 00:10:03,000
excuse me.

292
00:10:03,000 --> 00:10:05,000
This guy fucking

293
00:10:05,000 --> 00:10:07,000
Stevie Paddock.

294
00:10:07,000 --> 00:10:09,000
Why did he immortalize this fucker?

295
00:10:09,000 --> 00:10:11,000
You know, he pulls off this deed.

296
00:10:11,000 --> 00:10:13,000
What do you mean?

297
00:10:13,000 --> 00:10:15,000
The biggest mass killing in the United States.

298
00:10:15,000 --> 00:10:17,000
The biggest mass killing in the United States.

299
00:10:17,000 --> 00:10:19,000
The biggest one ever.

300
00:10:19,000 --> 00:10:21,000
And then they make up a fucking cover

301
00:10:21,000 --> 00:10:23,000
story.

302
00:10:23,000 --> 00:10:25,000
They don't question it.

303
00:10:25,000 --> 00:10:27,000
The fucking news media repeats the fucking propaganda.

304
00:10:27,000 --> 00:10:29,000
Everyone believes it.

305
00:10:29,000 --> 00:10:31,000
And it's such bullshit.

306
00:10:31,000 --> 00:10:33,000
It's all cyclical, man.

307
00:10:33,000 --> 00:10:35,000
If you can't see it, you gotta be fucking crazy.

308
00:10:35,000 --> 00:10:37,000
That's what I think, you know?

309
00:10:37,000 --> 00:10:39,000
I mean, it's just fucked up, man.

310
00:10:39,000 --> 00:10:41,000
Well, I mean, I think there's more to it

311
00:10:41,000 --> 00:10:43,000
than just a guy

312
00:10:43,000 --> 00:10:45,000
bust out the window

313
00:10:45,000 --> 00:10:47,000
and just start murdering people.

314
00:10:47,000 --> 00:10:49,000
I mean, come on.

315
00:10:49,000 --> 00:10:51,000
You know what I mean?

316
00:10:51,000 --> 00:10:53,000
School shooters, when you go back to them

317
00:10:53,000 --> 00:10:55,000
are people that mass murder

318
00:10:55,000 --> 00:10:57,000
have an agenda sort of.

319
00:10:57,000 --> 00:10:59,000
Like,

320
00:10:59,000 --> 00:11:01,000
somebody wronged them.

321
00:11:01,000 --> 00:11:03,000
Somebody bullied them.

322
00:11:03,000 --> 00:11:05,000
There's multiple variables that are intertwined.

323
00:11:05,000 --> 00:11:07,000
It's a combo of

324
00:11:07,000 --> 00:11:09,000
environment and mental fucking problems.

325
00:11:09,000 --> 00:11:11,000
Well, mental illness is something that

326
00:11:11,000 --> 00:11:13,000
everybody's like, oh, we need to get a handle on it.

327
00:11:13,000 --> 00:11:15,000
But how the fuck do you get a handle on it?

328
00:11:15,000 --> 00:11:17,000
Well, uh...

329
00:11:17,000 --> 00:11:19,000
You can't just lock people up anymore.

330
00:11:19,000 --> 00:11:21,000
And there's no beds.

331
00:11:21,000 --> 00:11:23,000
Listen, this fucking country is so jacked up

332
00:11:23,000 --> 00:11:25,000
right now that

333
00:11:25,000 --> 00:11:27,000
even if people...

334
00:11:27,000 --> 00:11:29,000
What are you gonna do?

335
00:11:29,000 --> 00:11:31,000
Look what they did in San Francisco.

336
00:11:31,000 --> 00:11:33,000
Fucking...they opened that.

337
00:11:33,000 --> 00:11:35,000
They took a hotel. They put all these homeless people in there.

338
00:11:35,000 --> 00:11:37,000
And a lot of people O.D.

339
00:11:37,000 --> 00:11:39,000
A lot of people that were fighting.

340
00:11:39,000 --> 00:11:41,000
It was crazy.

341
00:11:41,000 --> 00:11:43,000
Security guards didn't even want to be there.

342
00:11:43,000 --> 00:11:45,000
Vagabounds.

343
00:11:45,000 --> 00:11:47,000
Just running rampant.

344
00:11:47,000 --> 00:11:49,000
Fucking in the hallways. Fighting.

345
00:11:49,000 --> 00:11:51,000
O.D.ing.

346
00:11:51,000 --> 00:11:53,000
Drinking. Drugging.

347
00:11:53,000 --> 00:11:55,000
But...

348
00:11:55,000 --> 00:11:57,000
It's just like, uh...

349
00:11:57,000 --> 00:11:59,000
Do...

350
00:11:59,000 --> 00:12:01,000
I mean, being a Democrat...

351
00:12:01,000 --> 00:12:03,000
Is that being a leftist?

352
00:12:03,000 --> 00:12:05,000
No. No, not at all.

353
00:12:05,000 --> 00:12:07,000
What's the difference?

354
00:12:07,000 --> 00:12:09,000
Being a Democrat and Republican, it's all bullshit.

355
00:12:09,000 --> 00:12:11,000
I didn't say that.

356
00:12:11,000 --> 00:12:13,000
I said Democrat being a leftist.

357
00:12:13,000 --> 00:12:15,000
Oh, leftist is someone that's just

358
00:12:15,000 --> 00:12:17,000
fucking got radical ass fucking...

359
00:12:17,000 --> 00:12:19,000
So it's like...

360
00:12:19,000 --> 00:12:21,000
Being on the far right.

361
00:12:21,000 --> 00:12:23,000
That someone that has radical ass beliefs

362
00:12:23,000 --> 00:12:25,000
the other fucking way, you know?

363
00:12:25,000 --> 00:12:27,000
That's all.

364
00:12:27,000 --> 00:12:29,000
I'm a fucking centrist, man.

365
00:12:29,000 --> 00:12:31,000
I don't want shit to be running properly.

366
00:12:31,000 --> 00:12:33,000
Yeah, you like it in your center butthole.

367
00:12:33,000 --> 00:12:35,000
Yeah.

368
00:12:35,000 --> 00:12:37,000
I'm not gonna ban her, baby.

369
00:12:37,000 --> 00:12:39,000
Only if you lick it off when I'm done.

370
00:12:39,000 --> 00:12:41,000
Oh, Larry's Cream Pie Shop.

371
00:12:41,000 --> 00:12:43,000
The best ice cream in Boys Town.

372
00:12:43,000 --> 00:12:45,000
Yeah.

373
00:12:45,000 --> 00:12:47,000
Fuck you, needles.

374
00:12:47,000 --> 00:12:49,000
I'll get you a refrigerator box

375
00:12:49,000 --> 00:12:51,000
and you can just put your butt cheeks out.

376
00:12:51,000 --> 00:12:53,000
We'll cut a hole.

377
00:12:53,000 --> 00:12:55,000
Just lean your ass cheeks out.

378
00:12:55,000 --> 00:12:57,000
You like the hands coming out of the house?

379
00:12:57,000 --> 00:12:59,000
And then you just collect the money.

380
00:12:59,000 --> 00:13:01,000
You're like, what do you want to do?

381
00:13:01,000 --> 00:13:03,000
Like the hand coming out of the house, did you say?

382
00:13:03,000 --> 00:13:05,000
Hand in the house.

383
00:13:05,000 --> 00:13:07,000
Love that story.

384
00:13:07,000 --> 00:13:09,000
But, so...

385
00:13:09,000 --> 00:13:11,000
The feds are after me.

386
00:13:11,000 --> 00:13:13,000
Oh, yeah? What'd you do now?

387
00:13:13,000 --> 00:13:15,000
I was at January 6th.

388
00:13:15,000 --> 00:13:17,000
Oh, come on, you were not.

389
00:13:17,000 --> 00:13:19,000
Yeah, I was. I was making grilled cheese sandwiches in front.

390
00:13:19,000 --> 00:13:21,000
Those people had to eat, dude.

391
00:13:21,000 --> 00:13:23,000
Oh, they had to be fucking...

392
00:13:23,000 --> 00:13:25,000
You know what they're charging me for?

393
00:13:25,000 --> 00:13:27,000
Tax evasion, because I accepted cash.

394
00:13:27,000 --> 00:13:29,000
I did so good.

395
00:13:29,000 --> 00:13:31,000
That QAnon Buffalo dude

396
00:13:31,000 --> 00:13:33,000
he wanted a double one, so I made him one.

397
00:13:33,000 --> 00:13:35,000
Nice.

398
00:13:35,000 --> 00:13:37,000
Yeah, he kind of liked it.

399
00:13:37,000 --> 00:13:39,000
It wasn't bad.

400
00:13:39,000 --> 00:13:41,000
But then I had to go inside and wash my hands

401
00:13:41,000 --> 00:13:43,000
and I ended up in Pelosi's office.

402
00:13:43,000 --> 00:13:45,000
Nice, and you washed your hands in the pile of shit on the desk?

403
00:13:45,000 --> 00:13:47,000
No, I just sniffed it.

404
00:13:47,000 --> 00:13:49,000
I didn't...

405
00:13:49,000 --> 00:13:51,000
Actually, I sniffed her seat,

406
00:13:51,000 --> 00:13:53,000
but that guy sat in it first.

407
00:13:53,000 --> 00:13:55,000
So it was kind of bad.

408
00:13:55,000 --> 00:13:57,000
I wanted to steal the chair and sell it on eBay

409
00:13:57,000 --> 00:13:59,000
so you could smell Nancy Pelosi's mom.

410
00:13:59,000 --> 00:14:01,000
But

411
00:14:01,000 --> 00:14:03,000
they weren't interested in it.

412
00:14:03,000 --> 00:14:05,000
Oh, man.

413
00:14:05,000 --> 00:14:07,000
And it had a, you know, the state of the...

414
00:14:07,000 --> 00:14:09,000
Staying on there, being friends.

415
00:14:09,000 --> 00:14:11,000
Yeah, you know, the kids from the state, it has an emblem on it.

416
00:14:11,000 --> 00:14:13,000
Oh, yeah, yeah.

417
00:14:13,000 --> 00:14:15,000
You know, I mean, me carrying a fucking Nancy Pelosi's chair out

418
00:14:15,000 --> 00:14:17,000
and being like, hey, guys, I just want to let people sniff this.

419
00:14:17,000 --> 00:14:19,000
Yeah.

420
00:14:19,000 --> 00:14:21,000
You know? I mean, because her husbands are fun, okay?

421
00:14:21,000 --> 00:14:23,000
Right. Totally.

422
00:14:23,000 --> 00:14:25,000
I mean, isn't that the... he got hit in the head with a hammer?

423
00:14:25,000 --> 00:14:27,000
Yeah, supposedly.

424
00:14:27,000 --> 00:14:29,000
What do you mean, allegedly? No, there's video of this.

425
00:14:29,000 --> 00:14:31,000
Well, no, there's no video of him getting hit in the head with the hammer.

426
00:14:31,000 --> 00:14:33,000
We're not talking about it.

427
00:14:33,000 --> 00:14:35,000
That happens around the corner.

428
00:14:35,000 --> 00:14:37,000
They tell you.

429
00:14:37,000 --> 00:14:39,000
There's video of that, though.

430
00:14:39,000 --> 00:14:41,000
No, no, no. There's video of the guy lunging at him

431
00:14:41,000 --> 00:14:43,000
with the hammer, but you don't actually see

432
00:14:43,000 --> 00:14:45,000
the actual fucking hammer impact.

433
00:14:45,000 --> 00:14:47,000
Okay.

434
00:14:47,000 --> 00:14:49,000
They go around a corner

435
00:14:49,000 --> 00:14:51,000
in a hallway in their house.

436
00:14:51,000 --> 00:14:53,000
Okay.

437
00:14:53,000 --> 00:14:55,000
So you don't actually see the hit.

438
00:14:55,000 --> 00:14:57,000
100%

439
00:14:57,000 --> 00:14:59,000
I looked at it.

440
00:14:59,000 --> 00:15:01,000
I'm going to fact check you later.

441
00:15:01,000 --> 00:15:03,000
I don't pay attention to much.

442
00:15:03,000 --> 00:15:05,000
That kind of nonsense.

443
00:15:05,000 --> 00:15:07,000
I fucking definitely watch after.

444
00:15:07,000 --> 00:15:09,000
That's the most factual statement that's been said today.

445
00:15:09,000 --> 00:15:11,000
Probably.

446
00:15:11,000 --> 00:15:13,000
You can't do this. Oh, you know what I want to do?

447
00:15:13,000 --> 00:15:15,000
I have a pen and a paper here.

448
00:15:15,000 --> 00:15:17,000
I want you to draw the prophet Muhammad.

449
00:15:17,000 --> 00:15:19,000
Ha ha ha ha ha ha.

450
00:15:19,000 --> 00:15:21,000
Ha ha ha ha ha.

451
00:15:21,000 --> 00:15:23,000
You think you can do that?

452
00:15:23,000 --> 00:15:25,000
I think so.

453
00:15:25,000 --> 00:15:27,000
Maybe we should do that when we have listeners, too.

454
00:15:27,000 --> 00:15:29,000
I want the best drawing of prophet Muhammad.

455
00:15:29,000 --> 00:15:31,000
But I want them cool.

456
00:15:31,000 --> 00:15:33,000
I want one like a punk rock Muhammad.

457
00:15:33,000 --> 00:15:35,000
I want a surfing Muhammad.

458
00:15:35,000 --> 00:15:37,000
But your own interpretation.

459
00:15:37,000 --> 00:15:39,000
We should wait until we get down the line

460
00:15:39,000 --> 00:15:41,000
and we have a video aspect.

461
00:15:41,000 --> 00:15:43,000
Because then we could show my picture.

462
00:15:43,000 --> 00:15:45,000
No, not at all.

463
00:15:45,000 --> 00:15:47,000
We're drawing the prophet Muhammad.

464
00:15:47,000 --> 00:15:49,000
I don't want any video.

465
00:15:49,000 --> 00:15:51,000
I mean, Jesus Christ, man.

466
00:15:51,000 --> 00:15:53,000
This is packaged to the place.

467
00:15:53,000 --> 00:15:55,000
It's right, though.

468
00:15:55,000 --> 00:15:57,000
The feds are looking for me that way.

469
00:15:57,000 --> 00:15:59,000
They work out.

470
00:15:59,000 --> 00:16:01,000
They really fucking mopped up my grilled cheese

471
00:16:01,000 --> 00:16:03,000
in front of the insurrection.

472
00:16:03,000 --> 00:16:05,000
I had a good get going.

473
00:16:05,000 --> 00:16:07,000
Needles grilled cheese.

474
00:16:07,000 --> 00:16:09,000
No, the insurrection cheese, man.

475
00:16:09,000 --> 00:16:11,000
Insurrection burgers.

476
00:16:11,000 --> 00:16:13,000
I know. I mean, Jesus Christ,

477
00:16:13,000 --> 00:16:15,000
I made a couple hundred bucks and now they want tax on it.

478
00:16:15,000 --> 00:16:17,000
They're on government property.

479
00:16:17,000 --> 00:16:19,000
Ha ha ha.

480
00:16:19,000 --> 00:16:21,000
When am I going to fight the government, Larry?

481
00:16:21,000 --> 00:16:23,000
You can't fight city hall, brother.

482
00:16:23,000 --> 00:16:25,000
No, I can't at all.

483
00:16:25,000 --> 00:16:27,000
You can't fight city hall.

484
00:16:27,000 --> 00:16:29,000
I'm just here making tasty cheese

485
00:16:29,000 --> 00:16:31,000
and you want to take my cheese.

486
00:16:31,000 --> 00:16:33,000
Welcome to America.

487
00:16:33,000 --> 00:16:35,000
I mean, and we kicked the British out for taxing us.

488
00:16:35,000 --> 00:16:37,000
Right, I know.

489
00:16:37,000 --> 00:16:39,000
Look at these fucking hypocritical cocksuckers

490
00:16:39,000 --> 00:16:41,000
turn around and do the same fucking thing

491
00:16:41,000 --> 00:16:43,000
that they didn't like to begin with.

492
00:16:43,000 --> 00:16:45,000
Well, we're repressed.

493
00:16:45,000 --> 00:16:47,000
Oh, man. And oppressed.

494
00:16:47,000 --> 00:16:49,000
Well, yes.

495
00:16:49,000 --> 00:16:51,000
I mean, are we...

496
00:16:51,000 --> 00:16:53,000
But at least they're...

497
00:16:53,000 --> 00:16:55,000
At least it's easy to be gay now for you.

498
00:16:55,000 --> 00:16:57,000
You know, you don't have to be in the closet anymore.

499
00:16:57,000 --> 00:16:59,000
Talking to me personally, Jesus Larry,

500
00:16:59,000 --> 00:17:01,000
why are you...

501
00:17:01,000 --> 00:17:03,000
Howdy, man.

502
00:17:03,000 --> 00:17:05,000
You should have asked me first.

503
00:17:05,000 --> 00:17:07,000
You just can't do that on the air.

504
00:17:07,000 --> 00:17:09,000
Ha ha ha ha.

505
00:17:09,000 --> 00:17:11,000
But yeah, I understand what you mean.

506
00:17:11,000 --> 00:17:13,000
Well, did you see the Bud Light thing?

507
00:17:13,000 --> 00:17:15,000
I mean, you know,

508
00:17:15,000 --> 00:17:17,000
what you mean, well, did you see the Bud Light thing?

509
00:17:17,000 --> 00:17:19,000
I mean...

510
00:17:19,000 --> 00:17:21,000
Oh, yeah, the tranny on the can.

511
00:17:21,000 --> 00:17:23,000
Tranny on a canny?

512
00:17:23,000 --> 00:17:25,000
Ha ha ha ha.

513
00:17:25,000 --> 00:17:27,000
Actually, tranny without a canny.

514
00:17:27,000 --> 00:17:29,000
This fucking person...

515
00:17:29,000 --> 00:17:31,000
They got no ass?

516
00:17:31,000 --> 00:17:33,000
Well, this person

517
00:17:33,000 --> 00:17:35,000
um,

518
00:17:35,000 --> 00:17:37,000
dresses like a child

519
00:17:37,000 --> 00:17:39,000
and acts like a child.

520
00:17:39,000 --> 00:17:41,000
Oh my God.

521
00:17:41,000 --> 00:17:43,000
But this is documented. Like, I'm not making this up.

522
00:17:43,000 --> 00:17:45,000
Yes, this person does that.

523
00:17:45,000 --> 00:17:47,000
What the fuck?

524
00:17:47,000 --> 00:17:49,000
Is that the correct person?

525
00:17:49,000 --> 00:17:51,000
I don't care. Is it a man or a woman?

526
00:17:51,000 --> 00:17:53,000
It's a man, baby.

527
00:17:53,000 --> 00:17:55,000
It's a man.

528
00:17:55,000 --> 00:17:57,000
Time to make you lonely, baby.

529
00:17:57,000 --> 00:17:59,000
And I'll move the place.

530
00:17:59,000 --> 00:18:01,000
Ty.

531
00:18:01,000 --> 00:18:03,000
But, yeah,

532
00:18:03,000 --> 00:18:05,000
so the funny thing is, it's like...

533
00:18:07,000 --> 00:18:09,000
Talk about target audience, right?

534
00:18:09,000 --> 00:18:11,000
Yeah.

535
00:18:11,000 --> 00:18:13,000
I put a tranny.

536
00:18:13,000 --> 00:18:15,000
Yeah, that's really targeting the audience.

537
00:18:15,000 --> 00:18:17,000
Well, it's not even... Okay, they made a can for this person.

538
00:18:17,000 --> 00:18:19,000
Yeah.

539
00:18:19,000 --> 00:18:21,000
It's just a one-off can. They're not selling it like that.

540
00:18:21,000 --> 00:18:23,000
If it was still on the days of beer can collecting,

541
00:18:23,000 --> 00:18:25,000
that would be a valuable one.

542
00:18:25,000 --> 00:18:27,000
I'll tell you right now, though,

543
00:18:27,000 --> 00:18:29,000
if I was the head of marketing...

544
00:18:29,000 --> 00:18:31,000
If anyone gave a fuck.

545
00:18:31,000 --> 00:18:33,000
The head of marketing is a genius, because guess what?

546
00:18:33,000 --> 00:18:35,000
What?

547
00:18:35,000 --> 00:18:37,000
To talk about Bud Light.

548
00:18:37,000 --> 00:18:39,000
Any press is good press.

549
00:18:39,000 --> 00:18:41,000
What do you mean, you guess so?

550
00:18:41,000 --> 00:18:43,000
Well, yeah, I guess so.

551
00:18:43,000 --> 00:18:45,000
What the fuck do you mean? What do I mean?

552
00:18:45,000 --> 00:18:47,000
Did I say Chinese?

553
00:18:47,000 --> 00:18:49,000
Yeah, you did. I mean, Jesus.

554
00:18:49,000 --> 00:18:51,000
I couldn't understand you.

555
00:18:51,000 --> 00:18:53,000
Fucking Huxu.

556
00:18:53,000 --> 00:18:55,000
Fuckin...

557
00:18:55,000 --> 00:18:57,000
I saw.

558
00:18:57,000 --> 00:18:59,000
Yeah, why don't you go dip yourself in the duck sauce?

559
00:18:59,000 --> 00:19:01,000
I'll dip my nuts in there

560
00:19:01,000 --> 00:19:03,000
and you can lick it off.

561
00:19:03,000 --> 00:19:05,000
The cream of some young guy

562
00:19:05,000 --> 00:19:09,000
when you want your mouth.

563
00:19:09,000 --> 00:19:11,000
Ah.

564
00:19:11,000 --> 00:19:13,000
But I mean, the fucking...

565
00:19:13,000 --> 00:19:15,000
Any press is good press.

566
00:19:15,000 --> 00:19:17,000
Yeah, that's true.

567
00:19:17,000 --> 00:19:19,000
Just like the sex pistols.

568
00:19:19,000 --> 00:19:21,000
Getting the tour canceled

569
00:19:21,000 --> 00:19:23,000
just as good as them tour.

570
00:19:23,000 --> 00:19:25,000
Yeah, but it was a lot different back in the 70s.

571
00:19:25,000 --> 00:19:27,000
Come on.

572
00:19:27,000 --> 00:19:29,000
But it was a lot harder to get press back then.

573
00:19:29,000 --> 00:19:31,000
There was so much information coming

574
00:19:31,000 --> 00:19:33,000
into our brains right now

575
00:19:33,000 --> 00:19:35,000
that we didn't even fucking ridiculous.

576
00:19:35,000 --> 00:19:37,000
It's ridiculous.

577
00:19:37,000 --> 00:19:39,000
You don't even remember shit that you think

578
00:19:39,000 --> 00:19:41,000
you're gonna remember forever

579
00:19:41,000 --> 00:19:43,000
that you saw three days ago.

580
00:19:43,000 --> 00:19:45,000
You know what I'm saying?

581
00:19:45,000 --> 00:19:47,000
At least I don't.

582
00:19:47,000 --> 00:19:49,000
I always tell my kid, I'm like,

583
00:19:49,000 --> 00:19:51,000
I forgot more than you'll ever know.

584
00:19:51,000 --> 00:19:53,000
Isn't that the truth?

585
00:19:53,000 --> 00:19:55,000
And you're forgetting more than he'll ever know

586
00:19:55,000 --> 00:19:57,000
right as we speak.

587
00:19:57,000 --> 00:19:59,000
Larry, my synapses are bangin, bangin, bangin.

588
00:19:59,000 --> 00:20:01,000
It's like the 4th of July in there.

589
00:20:01,000 --> 00:20:03,000
So then...

590
00:20:03,000 --> 00:20:05,000
How was driving with Mary today?

591
00:20:05,000 --> 00:20:07,000
Oh, huh.

592
00:20:07,000 --> 00:20:09,000
Oh, huh.

593
00:20:09,000 --> 00:20:11,000
Actually, she did pretty...

594
00:20:11,000 --> 00:20:13,000
This is a new segment, driving with Mary.

595
00:20:13,000 --> 00:20:15,000
She did pretty good today.

596
00:20:15,000 --> 00:20:17,000
She really did.

597
00:20:17,000 --> 00:20:19,000
I was kind of though micromanaging

598
00:20:19,000 --> 00:20:21,000
at the whole time.

599
00:20:21,000 --> 00:20:23,000
I wasn't as relaxed as I was before.

600
00:20:23,000 --> 00:20:25,000
Yeah, you can't be.

601
00:20:25,000 --> 00:20:27,000
Even though the amount of weed you smoke.

602
00:20:27,000 --> 00:20:29,000
I mean, you're not gonna be able to do that.

603
00:20:29,000 --> 00:20:31,000
The amount of weed you smoke.

604
00:20:31,000 --> 00:20:33,000
I mean, you're on an eighth of weed

605
00:20:33,000 --> 00:20:35,000
before you get in the car.

606
00:20:35,000 --> 00:20:37,000
Yeah, and...

607
00:20:37,000 --> 00:20:39,000
And what?

608
00:20:39,000 --> 00:20:41,000
There wasn't, but there was nothing

609
00:20:41,000 --> 00:20:43,000
really too bad to speak of.

610
00:20:43,000 --> 00:20:45,000
Just a couple of times where people...

611
00:20:45,000 --> 00:20:47,000
Couple of incidents.

612
00:20:47,000 --> 00:20:49,000
Couple of times where people honked at her

613
00:20:49,000 --> 00:20:51,000
where she was going, you know,

614
00:20:51,000 --> 00:20:53,000
nine miles an hour in a 45.

615
00:20:53,000 --> 00:20:55,000
Well, wait a minute.

616
00:20:55,000 --> 00:20:57,000
See, this is not...

617
00:20:57,000 --> 00:20:59,000
She's doing nine miles an hour.

618
00:20:59,000 --> 00:21:01,000
But she doesn't even smoke weed.

619
00:21:01,000 --> 00:21:03,000
She doesn't even smoke weed.

620
00:21:03,000 --> 00:21:05,000
No, but she didn't go sideways

621
00:21:05,000 --> 00:21:07,000
in the lanes or anything like that.

622
00:21:07,000 --> 00:21:09,000
I've seen her cross two lanes

623
00:21:09,000 --> 00:21:11,000
of 50 mile-hour traffic at 25.

624
00:21:11,000 --> 00:21:13,000
Yeah, exactly.

625
00:21:13,000 --> 00:21:15,000
And just cut over and the car's like...

626
00:21:15,000 --> 00:21:17,000
I know.

627
00:21:17,000 --> 00:21:19,000
And she's like, look at this asshole behind me.

628
00:21:19,000 --> 00:21:21,000
Exactly.

629
00:21:21,000 --> 00:21:23,000
And you and I are just like cats, nails.

630
00:21:23,000 --> 00:21:25,000
And Duggan.

631
00:21:25,000 --> 00:21:27,000
Scared.

632
00:21:27,000 --> 00:21:29,000
Like a mother going cat under the bed.

633
00:21:33,000 --> 00:21:35,000
Luckily, she hasn't killed us yet.

634
00:21:35,000 --> 00:21:37,000
And she's like all oblivious to it.

635
00:21:37,000 --> 00:21:39,000
Oh, look, she goes, look...

636
00:21:39,000 --> 00:21:41,000
She goes, oh, look, I just figured it out

637
00:21:41,000 --> 00:21:43,000
why they moved...

638
00:21:43,000 --> 00:21:45,000
T.J. Maxx from the place

639
00:21:45,000 --> 00:21:47,000
where I liked it better.

640
00:21:47,000 --> 00:21:49,000
Because they wanted to put it close to home goods

641
00:21:49,000 --> 00:21:51,000
and I'm like, that's great, Mary.

642
00:21:51,000 --> 00:21:53,000
There's people, huh?

643
00:21:53,000 --> 00:21:55,000
And then she...

644
00:21:55,000 --> 00:21:57,000
She got a purse on her lap.

645
00:21:57,000 --> 00:21:59,000
And I mean, this ain't a purse.

646
00:21:59,000 --> 00:22:01,000
This thing was like a fucking army bag.

647
00:22:01,000 --> 00:22:03,000
And then instead of like

648
00:22:03,000 --> 00:22:05,000
stepping on the gas after everyone's passing

649
00:22:05,000 --> 00:22:07,000
and honking, flipping us off...

650
00:22:07,000 --> 00:22:09,000
She don't care.

651
00:22:09,000 --> 00:22:11,000
She turns and looks the other way and sees some other store

652
00:22:11,000 --> 00:22:13,000
and goes, oh, I always wanted to go to that place.

653
00:22:13,000 --> 00:22:15,000
Oh, my God.

654
00:22:15,000 --> 00:22:17,000
And I'm like, are you fucking kidding me?

655
00:22:17,000 --> 00:22:19,000
You are. You just want to die.

656
00:22:19,000 --> 00:22:21,000
You're like, I'm gonna die

657
00:22:21,000 --> 00:22:23,000
in this apartment. I know.

658
00:22:23,000 --> 00:22:25,000
And she doesn't even care.

659
00:22:25,000 --> 00:22:27,000
She doesn't even know we're about to die.

660
00:22:27,000 --> 00:22:29,000
Dude, this is my lawyer we're talking about.

661
00:22:29,000 --> 00:22:31,000
Also, she's oblivious

662
00:22:31,000 --> 00:22:33,000
to the rules of the road.

663
00:22:33,000 --> 00:22:35,000
Yeah.

664
00:22:35,000 --> 00:22:37,000
And she doesn't even smoke weed.

665
00:22:37,000 --> 00:22:39,000
She does that all on her own.

666
00:22:39,000 --> 00:22:41,000
I don't know about that.

667
00:22:41,000 --> 00:22:43,000
She might have...

668
00:22:43,000 --> 00:22:45,000
She didn't have any edibles today,

669
00:22:45,000 --> 00:22:47,000
but it was all a lot of distraction

670
00:22:47,000 --> 00:22:49,000
because we drove down...

671
00:22:49,000 --> 00:22:51,000
I can't think of the road.

672
00:22:51,000 --> 00:22:53,000
Where'd you go?

673
00:22:53,000 --> 00:22:55,000
We went to Costco, but the road...

674
00:22:55,000 --> 00:22:57,000
Oh, we took Gary.

675
00:22:57,000 --> 00:22:59,000
Yeah, Gary, yeah, yeah, yeah.

676
00:22:59,000 --> 00:23:01,000
Between Gary and...

677
00:23:01,000 --> 00:23:03,000
between like, Schick and Army Trail,

678
00:23:03,000 --> 00:23:05,000
there's like 50 fucking stores.

679
00:23:05,000 --> 00:23:07,000
Yeah, she's just like...

680
00:23:07,000 --> 00:23:09,000
There's woodmines over there,

681
00:23:09,000 --> 00:23:11,000
and the mall is over there.

682
00:23:11,000 --> 00:23:13,000
And it's 45 miles an hour.

683
00:23:13,000 --> 00:23:15,000
She was like, oh, I always wanted to go there.

684
00:23:15,000 --> 00:23:17,000
She's like an old school pimp just driving.

685
00:23:17,000 --> 00:23:19,000
It's like a merchandise.

686
00:23:19,000 --> 00:23:21,000
And they're just all stores.

687
00:23:21,000 --> 00:23:23,000
She's like, oh, my God, they got a home goods.

688
00:23:23,000 --> 00:23:25,000
Like, Jesus Mary, it's 45

689
00:23:25,000 --> 00:23:27,000
and you're doing 20.

690
00:23:27,000 --> 00:23:29,000
We're going to get arrested

691
00:23:29,000 --> 00:23:31,000
and there's 50 roaches in the car.

692
00:23:31,000 --> 00:23:33,000
And when you...

693
00:23:33,000 --> 00:23:35,000
It's like Cheech and Chong with...

694
00:23:35,000 --> 00:23:37,000
You...

695
00:23:37,000 --> 00:23:39,000
You roll the wind.

696
00:23:39,000 --> 00:23:41,000
They have to arrest her

697
00:23:41,000 --> 00:23:43,000
just for the amount of roaches.

698
00:23:43,000 --> 00:23:45,000
They're like, oh, my God.

699
00:23:45,000 --> 00:23:47,000
They're like, oh, my God.

700
00:23:47,000 --> 00:23:49,000
I better clean that shit out.

701
00:23:49,000 --> 00:23:51,000
And they're all over the place too.

702
00:23:51,000 --> 00:23:53,000
It's literally a roach will tell.

703
00:23:53,000 --> 00:23:55,000
What's that? I better clean that shit out.

704
00:23:55,000 --> 00:23:57,000
Yeah, you think? I mean, that's my lawyer.

705
00:23:57,000 --> 00:23:59,000
How's she going to get out of her own situation?

706
00:23:59,000 --> 00:24:01,000
They're never going to believe she's not stoned.

707
00:24:01,000 --> 00:24:03,000
And they always say...

708
00:24:03,000 --> 00:24:05,000
What is she going to be like?

709
00:24:05,000 --> 00:24:07,000
I don't smoke weed and there's just roaches all over.

710
00:24:07,000 --> 00:24:09,000
You literally have an ashtray in the car.

711
00:24:09,000 --> 00:24:11,000
Like a home ashtray.

712
00:24:11,000 --> 00:24:13,000
Yeah.

713
00:24:13,000 --> 00:24:15,000
I was like 20.

714
00:24:15,000 --> 00:24:17,000
But you know what though?

715
00:24:17,000 --> 00:24:19,000
It's kind of like a car ashtray because it says root 66 on the bottom.

716
00:24:19,000 --> 00:24:21,000
That's just a root.

717
00:24:21,000 --> 00:24:23,000
That's nothing to do with cars.

718
00:24:23,000 --> 00:24:25,000
Somebody gave me that ashtray.

719
00:24:25,000 --> 00:24:27,000
All right, well, good for them.

720
00:24:27,000 --> 00:24:29,000
But your first statement, what you just said,

721
00:24:29,000 --> 00:24:31,000
has nothing to do with it.

722
00:24:31,000 --> 00:24:33,000
Well, you know, root 66 and it says on the bottom...

723
00:24:33,000 --> 00:24:35,000
It's a car thing, yeah.

724
00:24:35,000 --> 00:24:37,000
But it's not a car ashtray.

725
00:24:37,000 --> 00:24:39,000
No, I know.

726
00:24:39,000 --> 00:24:41,000
I figured it kind of went with the car because of that.

727
00:24:41,000 --> 00:24:43,000
I mean, fuck it.

728
00:24:43,000 --> 00:24:45,000
I thought they kind of went together.

729
00:24:45,000 --> 00:24:47,000
No, they really...

730
00:24:47,000 --> 00:24:49,000
The car, root 66, you know.

731
00:24:49,000 --> 00:24:51,000
There's some sort of simile there, shall I say, but...

732
00:24:53,000 --> 00:24:55,000
It's all right.

733
00:24:55,000 --> 00:24:57,000
Going to St. Louis, down to Missouri.

734
00:24:57,000 --> 00:24:59,000
Oklahoma City is all so pretty.

735
00:24:59,000 --> 00:25:01,000
Let's see.

736
00:25:01,000 --> 00:25:03,000
And real old root 66, you know.

737
00:25:03,000 --> 00:25:05,000
Who sings that?

738
00:25:05,000 --> 00:25:07,000
Oh shit, Chuck Berry, the Stones.

739
00:25:07,000 --> 00:25:09,000
Man, that guy, man. Chuck Berry.

740
00:25:09,000 --> 00:25:11,000
Dude, I've been listening to Chuck Berry.

741
00:25:11,000 --> 00:25:13,000
The ultimate curve.

742
00:25:13,000 --> 00:25:15,000
No, no, let's not brush over the ultimate curve.

743
00:25:15,000 --> 00:25:17,000
No, I won't though, but I'm just letting you know

744
00:25:17,000 --> 00:25:19,000
before you get into that that

745
00:25:19,000 --> 00:25:21,000
he is great, man.

746
00:25:21,000 --> 00:25:23,000
I've been listening to Chuck Berry solid

747
00:25:23,000 --> 00:25:25,000
for the last, like, fucking week and a half.

748
00:25:25,000 --> 00:25:27,000
The best video ever, Chuck Berry.

749
00:25:27,000 --> 00:25:29,000
Farting in the Hooker space.

750
00:25:29,000 --> 00:25:31,000
No, no, no, no, no. Chuck Berry, John Lennon

751
00:25:31,000 --> 00:25:33,000
and Yoko, and she starts screaming.

752
00:25:33,000 --> 00:25:35,000
That is a good look on his face.

753
00:25:35,000 --> 00:25:37,000
She comes out in a black bag

754
00:25:37,000 --> 00:25:39,000
and he's like, what the fuck is going on?

755
00:25:39,000 --> 00:25:41,000
She was in a trash bag.

756
00:25:41,000 --> 00:25:43,000
Someone threw out the fucking Nuk Sue.

757
00:25:43,000 --> 00:25:45,000
He's like, where the fuck

758
00:25:45,000 --> 00:25:47,000
is this disco room?

759
00:25:47,000 --> 00:25:49,000
And then she goes, man, they turn her mic.

760
00:25:49,000 --> 00:25:51,000
The look on his face, he didn't have that face

761
00:25:51,000 --> 00:25:53,000
when he was farting that chick's face.

762
00:25:53,000 --> 00:25:55,000
I almost, no. He was happy.

763
00:25:55,000 --> 00:25:57,000
The look on his face was like, oh my god.

764
00:25:57,000 --> 00:25:59,000
Unhappy. He thought the feds fighting

765
00:25:59,000 --> 00:26:01,000
and caught him. He wanted to kick John Lennon

766
00:26:01,000 --> 00:26:03,000
in the balls for fucking doing that.

767
00:26:03,000 --> 00:26:05,000
He was like, what the fuck is going on?

768
00:26:05,000 --> 00:26:07,000
He was like, who brought

769
00:26:07,000 --> 00:26:09,000
English cocksucker?

770
00:26:09,000 --> 00:26:11,000
We don't play that shit here.

771
00:26:11,000 --> 00:26:13,000
He brought me this bitch, kid.

772
00:26:13,000 --> 00:26:15,000
She's just yelling and screaming.

773
00:26:15,000 --> 00:26:17,000
Like fucking, you know,

774
00:26:17,000 --> 00:26:19,000
that's got him in Vietnam, just got

775
00:26:19,000 --> 00:26:21,000
fighter bombs.

776
00:26:21,000 --> 00:26:23,000
But the look on his face.

777
00:26:23,000 --> 00:26:25,000
That's how she made her art.

778
00:26:25,000 --> 00:26:27,000
She would evoke images of her old village

779
00:26:27,000 --> 00:26:29,000
going up in flames.

780
00:26:29,000 --> 00:26:31,000
We need to fact check that later.

781
00:26:31,000 --> 00:26:33,000
We need to check that later.

782
00:26:33,000 --> 00:26:35,000
We need to fact check that later.

783
00:26:35,000 --> 00:26:37,000
Hahaha.

784
00:26:37,000 --> 00:26:39,000
Allegedly.

785
00:26:39,000 --> 00:26:41,000
Allegedly.

786
00:26:41,000 --> 00:26:43,000
They're using air quotes as we speak.

787
00:26:43,000 --> 00:26:45,000
Let me hit that jib later.

788
00:26:45,000 --> 00:26:47,000
But then the funny

789
00:26:47,000 --> 00:26:49,000
I had another joint.

790
00:26:49,000 --> 00:26:51,000
I gotta find that motherfucker.

791
00:26:51,000 --> 00:26:53,000
Just like you. You're out.

792
00:26:53,000 --> 00:26:55,000
Coming out of the closet.

793
00:26:55,000 --> 00:26:57,000
Hahaha.

794
00:26:57,000 --> 00:26:59,000
But I heard, I was reading this thing about

795
00:26:59,000 --> 00:27:01,000
John Lennon and there was like some stupid

796
00:27:01,000 --> 00:27:03,000
Yoko Ono did.

797
00:27:03,000 --> 00:27:05,000
He climbed out of ladder and looked through some stupid

798
00:27:05,000 --> 00:27:07,000
thing and then he was like,

799
00:27:07,000 --> 00:27:09,000
ah, you know what?

800
00:27:09,000 --> 00:27:11,000
I'll help the Jap.

801
00:27:11,000 --> 00:27:13,000
Is she Japanese? What is she?

802
00:27:13,000 --> 00:27:15,000
Yeah, yeah, she's a Jap.

803
00:27:15,000 --> 00:27:17,000
Well, here we go. Let me Hiroshima her ass.

804
00:27:17,000 --> 00:27:19,000
No, and here's the thing.

805
00:27:19,000 --> 00:27:21,000
She was a real cool chick.

806
00:27:21,000 --> 00:27:23,000
You think she pooped on him inside?

807
00:27:23,000 --> 00:27:25,000
I don't know about that.

808
00:27:25,000 --> 00:27:27,000
But I'll tell you one thing though.

809
00:27:27,000 --> 00:27:29,000
She hung around with a lot of the jazz cats.

810
00:27:29,000 --> 00:27:31,000
Or Nat Coleman and all these fucking

811
00:27:31,000 --> 00:27:33,000
avant-garde guys.

812
00:27:33,000 --> 00:27:35,000
You know, Lamont Young and shit.

813
00:27:35,000 --> 00:27:37,000
You know, in New York.

814
00:27:37,000 --> 00:27:39,000
And so she already

815
00:27:39,000 --> 00:27:41,000
was in a scene before

816
00:27:41,000 --> 00:27:43,000
she hooked up with John Lennon.

817
00:27:43,000 --> 00:27:45,000
But that's how it was back then.

818
00:27:45,000 --> 00:27:47,000
There was a scene.

819
00:27:47,000 --> 00:27:49,000
But think about that.

820
00:27:49,000 --> 00:27:51,000
Your group was your group.

821
00:27:51,000 --> 00:27:53,000
Like, there was so much going the fuck

822
00:27:53,000 --> 00:27:55,000
on. Punk and fucking

823
00:27:55,000 --> 00:27:57,000
pro whatever fucking

824
00:27:57,000 --> 00:27:59,000
everything was going on.

825
00:27:59,000 --> 00:28:01,000
That's all those people had that was the center of their life.

826
00:28:01,000 --> 00:28:03,000
You know what I mean?

827
00:28:03,000 --> 00:28:05,000
If you could get into the jazz club.

828
00:28:05,000 --> 00:28:07,000
Here's what happened.

829
00:28:07,000 --> 00:28:09,000
He had to climb up this ladder.

830
00:28:09,000 --> 00:28:11,000
Who did?

831
00:28:11,000 --> 00:28:13,000
John Lennon.

832
00:28:13,000 --> 00:28:15,000
And he had to be on the top step

833
00:28:15,000 --> 00:28:17,000
to see what she had.

834
00:28:17,000 --> 00:28:19,000
It was a magnifying glass.

835
00:28:19,000 --> 00:28:21,000
And he had to look at this little piece of paper

836
00:28:21,000 --> 00:28:23,000
with a magnifying glass.

837
00:28:23,000 --> 00:28:25,000
You think Hinkley meant the shit Yoko

838
00:28:25,000 --> 00:28:27,000
when he accidentally shot fucking Lennon?

839
00:28:27,000 --> 00:28:29,000
You think Hinkley accidentally

840
00:28:29,000 --> 00:28:31,000
shot Lennon and studied Yoko?

841
00:28:31,000 --> 00:28:33,000
No, I think Yoko hired his ass.

842
00:28:33,000 --> 00:28:35,000
Yeah, there we go.

843
00:28:35,000 --> 00:28:37,000
I think that fucking hired his ass off.

844
00:28:37,000 --> 00:28:39,000
I think he really did too.

845
00:28:39,000 --> 00:28:41,000
Listen motherfucker, we'll get you out of jail

846
00:28:41,000 --> 00:28:43,000
even later down the line.

847
00:28:43,000 --> 00:28:45,000
Man, we had tickets to go see him.

848
00:28:45,000 --> 00:28:47,000
We'll fucking the guy was probably like drugs.

849
00:28:47,000 --> 00:28:49,000
They said we'll put you in a cycle.

850
00:28:49,000 --> 00:28:51,000
It was Hinkley, right?

851
00:28:51,000 --> 00:28:53,000
No, Hinkley shot Reagan.

852
00:28:53,000 --> 00:28:55,000
I shot David Chapman.

853
00:28:55,000 --> 00:28:57,000
Wasn't that the guy that we had tickets to go see?

854
00:28:57,000 --> 00:28:59,000
Yes, Mark David Chapman.

855
00:28:59,000 --> 00:29:01,000
I apologize listeners.

856
00:29:01,000 --> 00:29:03,000
It was Mark David Chapman.

857
00:29:03,000 --> 00:29:05,000
Hinkley was the guy who shot Reagan.

858
00:29:05,000 --> 00:29:07,000
I shot Reagan.

859
00:29:07,000 --> 00:29:09,000
Suicidal tendency.

860
00:29:09,000 --> 00:29:11,000
Shout out to my boys.

861
00:29:11,000 --> 00:29:13,000
New merch coming out. I shot Reagan t-shirts.

862
00:29:15,000 --> 00:29:17,000
Two thumbs pointing at you.

863
00:29:19,000 --> 00:29:21,000
But Chapman, you think Yoko hired him?

864
00:29:21,000 --> 00:29:23,000
Yeah.

865
00:29:23,000 --> 00:29:25,000
Just like Courtney Love killed Kurt Cobain.

866
00:29:25,000 --> 00:29:27,000
Sure, Courtney Love definitely killed Kurt Cobain.

867
00:29:27,000 --> 00:29:29,000
Allegedly.

868
00:29:29,000 --> 00:29:31,000
If you ever saw that movie, Curt and Courtney.

869
00:29:31,000 --> 00:29:33,000
Yeah.

870
00:29:33,000 --> 00:29:35,000
They definitely make you fucking think that she did.

871
00:29:35,000 --> 00:29:37,000
Both the fucking cartoons in the middle of it?

872
00:29:37,000 --> 00:29:39,000
No, no, no.

873
00:29:39,000 --> 00:29:41,000
Oh, okay, yeah, yeah.

874
00:29:41,000 --> 00:29:43,000
They interview her father.

875
00:29:43,000 --> 00:29:45,000
They interview this guy, El Ducci from the mentors.

876
00:29:45,000 --> 00:29:47,000
El Ducci.

877
00:29:47,000 --> 00:29:49,000
This band that fucking wears hoods over their head.

878
00:29:49,000 --> 00:29:51,000
She offered him 20 grand

879
00:29:51,000 --> 00:29:53,000
to kill Kurt Cobain.

880
00:29:53,000 --> 00:29:55,000
And what's his guy's name?

881
00:29:55,000 --> 00:29:57,000
El Ducci.

882
00:29:57,000 --> 00:29:59,000
And what does he wear? A hood.

883
00:29:59,000 --> 00:30:01,000
He doesn't sound that reputable.

884
00:30:01,000 --> 00:30:03,000
No, he's not. He's a little life.

885
00:30:03,000 --> 00:30:05,000
He lives in a fucking trailer and shit.

886
00:30:05,000 --> 00:30:07,000
But anyways, they went back to do a second interview with the guy.

887
00:30:07,000 --> 00:30:09,000
And somebody pushed him in front of a fucking train.

888
00:30:09,000 --> 00:30:11,000
How big was he?

889
00:30:11,000 --> 00:30:13,000
A pretty big guy.

890
00:30:13,000 --> 00:30:15,000
Like fucking, like Brian Harlan.

891
00:30:15,000 --> 00:30:17,000
Oh shit, that's a big dude.

892
00:30:17,000 --> 00:30:19,000
Yeah, dude.

893
00:30:19,000 --> 00:30:21,000
Alright, El Ducci.

894
00:30:21,000 --> 00:30:23,000
Yeah, and so, you know,

895
00:30:23,000 --> 00:30:25,000
on this movie...

896
00:30:25,000 --> 00:30:27,000
You're gonna have this Ducci do the left hand side.

897
00:30:27,000 --> 00:30:29,000
On this movie,

898
00:30:29,000 --> 00:30:31,000
so they go to interview him the second time

899
00:30:31,000 --> 00:30:33,000
and he's fucking dead.

900
00:30:33,000 --> 00:30:35,000
Hey, did you set the timer?

901
00:30:35,000 --> 00:30:37,000
Yeah, and he's dead and so they're like,

902
00:30:37,000 --> 00:30:39,000
da-da!

903
00:30:39,000 --> 00:30:41,000
And then it adds fucking belief

904
00:30:41,000 --> 00:30:43,000
that Courtney Love is a fucking

905
00:30:43,000 --> 00:30:45,000
downright bloodthirsty killer.

906
00:30:45,000 --> 00:30:47,000
Okay, and?

907
00:30:47,000 --> 00:30:49,000
And there was other people that came forward

908
00:30:49,000 --> 00:30:51,000
and said that she asked him

909
00:30:51,000 --> 00:30:53,000
them to kill Kurt Cobain.

910
00:30:53,000 --> 00:30:55,000
And also, they said that Kurt Cobain

911
00:30:55,000 --> 00:30:57,000
never mentioned suicide

912
00:30:57,000 --> 00:30:59,000
ever until

913
00:30:59,000 --> 00:31:01,000
Courtney Love started fucking...

914
00:31:01,000 --> 00:31:03,000
I mean, he's saying a song about it.

915
00:31:03,000 --> 00:31:05,000
After she started planting it,

916
00:31:05,000 --> 00:31:07,000
planting it and said,

917
00:31:07,000 --> 00:31:09,000
that's what they say.

918
00:31:09,000 --> 00:31:11,000
Well, who says that? Who's they?

919
00:31:11,000 --> 00:31:13,000
They, you know, they.

920
00:31:13,000 --> 00:31:15,000
They're fucking...

921
00:31:15,000 --> 00:31:17,000
The Illuminati?

922
00:31:17,000 --> 00:31:19,000
Now we're all done.

923
00:31:19,000 --> 00:31:21,000
Now we're in a triangle of fucking

924
00:31:21,000 --> 00:31:23,000
the Illuminati.

925
00:31:23,000 --> 00:31:25,000
I don't know who the fuck they is.

926
00:31:25,000 --> 00:31:27,000
Well, then why would you say that?

927
00:31:27,000 --> 00:31:29,000
Oh, fuck yourself. Why would I say that?

928
00:31:29,000 --> 00:31:31,000
Now you get all defensive.

929
00:31:31,000 --> 00:31:33,000
Maybe you had a hand in it.

930
00:31:33,000 --> 00:31:35,000
Jesus Christ, Larry,

931
00:31:35,000 --> 00:31:37,000
did you kill Kurt Cobain?

932
00:31:37,000 --> 00:31:39,000
No.

933
00:31:39,000 --> 00:31:41,000
Kurt Cobain was born like 10 days apart.

934
00:31:41,000 --> 00:31:43,000
Where'd you get that chain, Larry?

935
00:31:43,000 --> 00:31:45,000
I'll tell you what, man.

936
00:31:45,000 --> 00:31:47,000
This rug was my uncle got this

937
00:31:47,000 --> 00:31:49,000
in Alaska

938
00:31:49,000 --> 00:31:51,000
when he was in the Air Force.

939
00:31:51,000 --> 00:31:53,000
Nice.

940
00:31:53,000 --> 00:31:55,000
And he brought back a little dog

941
00:31:55,000 --> 00:31:57,000
from there, too.

942
00:31:57,000 --> 00:31:59,000
He brought back a dog? Like a live dog?

943
00:31:59,000 --> 00:32:01,000
Yeah, an Alaskan Malamute.

944
00:32:01,000 --> 00:32:03,000
That's not a little dog.

945
00:32:03,000 --> 00:32:05,000
Well, no, it was a baby when he brought it back.

946
00:32:05,000 --> 00:32:07,000
Yeah, and that fucking was in a wolf.

947
00:32:07,000 --> 00:32:09,000
And it got bigger and then it bit every kid in the fucking...

948
00:32:09,000 --> 00:32:11,000
every kid in the neighborhood except me and my brother.

949
00:32:11,000 --> 00:32:13,000
Oh, well, because you guys were family.

950
00:32:13,000 --> 00:32:15,000
Yeah.

951
00:32:15,000 --> 00:32:17,000
And so my grandmother had to get rid of it.

952
00:32:17,000 --> 00:32:19,000
No.

953
00:32:19,000 --> 00:32:21,000
I mean, it was a...

954
00:32:21,000 --> 00:32:23,000
Fucking bit every...

955
00:32:23,000 --> 00:32:25,000
It just makes up you and no joke, Nick.

956
00:32:25,000 --> 00:32:27,000
It was a vicious motherfucker.

957
00:32:27,000 --> 00:32:29,000
Oh, he was cute though.

958
00:32:29,000 --> 00:32:31,000
Your grandfather brought a dog from Alaska.

959
00:32:31,000 --> 00:32:33,000
My uncle.

960
00:32:33,000 --> 00:32:35,000
What was his name? Pete.

961
00:32:35,000 --> 00:32:37,000
Uncle Pete brought it back.

962
00:32:37,000 --> 00:32:39,000
Your brother.

963
00:32:39,000 --> 00:32:41,000
My uncle Pete gave me my first Rolling Stones record.

964
00:32:41,000 --> 00:32:43,000
First of all, what year was this, you think?

965
00:32:43,000 --> 00:32:45,000
70s?

966
00:32:45,000 --> 00:32:47,000
Yeah.

967
00:32:47,000 --> 00:32:49,000
Okay.

968
00:32:49,000 --> 00:32:51,000
So Uncle Pete goes up to Alaska?

969
00:32:51,000 --> 00:32:53,000
Yeah.

970
00:32:53,000 --> 00:32:55,000
He drove?

971
00:32:55,000 --> 00:32:57,000
No, no, no. He was in the Air Force.

972
00:32:57,000 --> 00:32:59,000
Oh.

973
00:32:59,000 --> 00:33:01,000
He was stationed in Alaska.

974
00:33:01,000 --> 00:33:03,000
And he just brought back a weird Alaskan dog?

975
00:33:03,000 --> 00:33:05,000
Yeah, they found puppies.

976
00:33:05,000 --> 00:33:07,000
You know, they're fucking like army guys and shit.

977
00:33:07,000 --> 00:33:09,000
They fucking see little babies.

978
00:33:09,000 --> 00:33:11,000
They usually shoot them when they see little babies.

979
00:33:11,000 --> 00:33:13,000
Well, they were all gonna go home and leave.

980
00:33:13,000 --> 00:33:15,000
Allegedly.

981
00:33:15,000 --> 00:33:17,000
Everyone grabbed one up and fucking a couple of guys took one home.

982
00:33:17,000 --> 00:33:19,000
And my uncle was one of the guys that took one home.

983
00:33:19,000 --> 00:33:21,000
Would he just bring their fucker on a plane?

984
00:33:21,000 --> 00:33:23,000
Well, you're taking an army plane.

985
00:33:23,000 --> 00:33:25,000
Oh, yeah.

986
00:33:25,000 --> 00:33:27,000
So you're not really on a fucking...

987
00:33:27,000 --> 00:33:29,000
Civilian plane.

988
00:33:29,000 --> 00:33:31,000
Yeah, you're not on a civilian plane.

989
00:33:31,000 --> 00:33:33,000
Oh my God, Larry, that fucking pedo mustache, dude.

990
00:33:33,000 --> 00:33:35,000
Dude, Larry...

991
00:33:35,000 --> 00:33:37,000
Fucking has a pedo mustache.

992
00:33:37,000 --> 00:33:39,000
I got my...

993
00:33:39,000 --> 00:33:41,000
He ran and slowed down, Larry.

994
00:33:41,000 --> 00:33:43,000
Slash poor mustache.

995
00:33:43,000 --> 00:33:45,000
Don't try to defend yourself.

996
00:33:45,000 --> 00:33:47,000
Wait a minute. It's a half a handlebar.

997
00:33:47,000 --> 00:33:49,000
It's a kid's bike, Shelley.

998
00:33:49,000 --> 00:33:51,000
And I swear to God,

999
00:33:51,000 --> 00:33:53,000
this is the guy, Larry looks like the guy

1000
00:33:53,000 --> 00:33:55,000
who goes to the play yard during the day

1001
00:33:55,000 --> 00:33:57,000
when the kids are running around

1002
00:33:57,000 --> 00:33:59,000
and just puts his lips through the chair.

1003
00:33:59,000 --> 00:34:01,000
And he's like,

1004
00:34:01,000 --> 00:34:03,000
he's running around and just puts his lips

1005
00:34:03,000 --> 00:34:05,000
through the chain link fence

1006
00:34:05,000 --> 00:34:07,000
and just blows smooches to children.

1007
00:34:07,000 --> 00:34:09,000
Okay.

1008
00:34:09,000 --> 00:34:11,000
Allegedly.

1009
00:34:11,000 --> 00:34:13,000
Whatever you want to think.

1010
00:34:13,000 --> 00:34:15,000
Whatever I could see with that mustache,

1011
00:34:15,000 --> 00:34:17,000
all of a sudden, man...

1012
00:34:17,000 --> 00:34:19,000
Man, this is what Frank Zappa had right here.

1013
00:34:19,000 --> 00:34:21,000
I mean, yeah, fucking A.

1014
00:34:21,000 --> 00:34:23,000
Same exact thing.

1015
00:34:23,000 --> 00:34:25,000
And?

1016
00:34:25,000 --> 00:34:27,000
And?

1017
00:34:27,000 --> 00:34:29,000
Looks like you like to kiss kids.

1018
00:34:29,000 --> 00:34:31,000
And you're just passing me as you getting arrested.

1019
00:34:31,000 --> 00:34:33,000
Hey, man.

1020
00:34:33,000 --> 00:34:35,000
They can look at my laptop.

1021
00:34:35,000 --> 00:34:37,000
I'm no hunter-biden.

1022
00:34:37,000 --> 00:34:39,000
Oh, yeah, I'm sure.

1023
00:34:39,000 --> 00:34:41,000
Sounds like a guy that got into guilt.

1024
00:34:41,000 --> 00:34:43,000
I'd have to hire Hillary's people

1025
00:34:43,000 --> 00:34:45,000
to fucking smash it with a hammer.

1026
00:34:45,000 --> 00:34:47,000
Couldn't afford Hillary's people.

1027
00:34:47,000 --> 00:34:49,000
With that mustache, I'm sure you have a gang of guys around.

1028
00:34:49,000 --> 00:34:51,000
You guys don't like to share

1029
00:34:51,000 --> 00:34:53,000
on the dark board.

1030
00:34:53,000 --> 00:34:55,000
But that's all right, though.

1031
00:34:55,000 --> 00:34:57,000
I mean, this thing is amazing.

1032
00:34:57,000 --> 00:34:59,000
I've never seen a literary with a mustache

1033
00:34:59,000 --> 00:35:01,000
in all the years I've known him.

1034
00:35:01,000 --> 00:35:03,000
I used to have a mustache when I was around

1035
00:35:03,000 --> 00:35:05,000
these Puerto Rican and Mexican gangbangers.

1036
00:35:05,000 --> 00:35:07,000
Yeah, it was before I knew you, though.

1037
00:35:07,000 --> 00:35:09,000
Yeah, but I had to fit in.

1038
00:35:09,000 --> 00:35:11,000
Did you just...

1039
00:35:11,000 --> 00:35:13,000
I was in my 20s, though, so it was black.

1040
00:35:13,000 --> 00:35:15,000
Oh, it was pencil thin?

1041
00:35:15,000 --> 00:35:17,000
No, it was black.

1042
00:35:17,000 --> 00:35:19,000
Oh, Jesus, you're gonna have to get racist.

1043
00:35:19,000 --> 00:35:21,000
It didn't look like this, man.

1044
00:35:21,000 --> 00:35:23,000
This is pretty...

1045
00:35:23,000 --> 00:35:25,000
It's almost like I don't have one from far away.

1046
00:35:25,000 --> 00:35:27,000
It's so weird because your hair is black.

1047
00:35:27,000 --> 00:35:29,000
And your mustache is completely gray.

1048
00:35:29,000 --> 00:35:31,000
Yeah.

1049
00:35:31,000 --> 00:35:33,000
But, you know, if you look on the sides,

1050
00:35:33,000 --> 00:35:35,000
my hair is getting gray.

1051
00:35:35,000 --> 00:35:37,000
It's creeping up, man.

1052
00:35:37,000 --> 00:35:39,000
I know it is, but I mean, that mustache,

1053
00:35:39,000 --> 00:35:41,000
it fucking screams chocolate milk.

1054
00:35:41,000 --> 00:35:43,000
And you like to share with little kids.

1055
00:35:43,000 --> 00:35:45,000
You're just handing out gummy bears

1056
00:35:45,000 --> 00:35:47,000
at the bus stop.

1057
00:35:47,000 --> 00:35:49,000
But that's all right.

1058
00:35:49,000 --> 00:35:51,000
Shit. Hey, speaking of little kids,

1059
00:35:51,000 --> 00:35:53,000
you should buy this keyboard off me for...

1060
00:35:53,000 --> 00:35:55,000
Well, we have to edit that out, but that's fine.

1061
00:35:55,000 --> 00:35:57,000
Ah, come on, man.

1062
00:35:57,000 --> 00:35:59,000
Yeah, I know. Okay, but I understand that.

1063
00:35:59,000 --> 00:36:01,000
You should buy it for your son.

1064
00:36:01,000 --> 00:36:03,000
I'm not gonna buy anything. You're gonna give it to me

1065
00:36:03,000 --> 00:36:05,000
and we'll be fine.

1066
00:36:05,000 --> 00:36:07,000
Yeah, exactly. See, there we go.

1067
00:36:07,000 --> 00:36:09,000
Deal...

1068
00:36:09,000 --> 00:36:11,000
Ah, fuck.

1069
00:36:11,000 --> 00:36:13,000
I lost it for a minute.

1070
00:36:13,000 --> 00:36:15,000
Deal sealed?

1071
00:36:15,000 --> 00:36:17,000
Yes, you're not even deal sealed,

1072
00:36:17,000 --> 00:36:19,000
but the deal is done.

1073
00:36:19,000 --> 00:36:21,000
Yeah, yeah, okay.

1074
00:36:21,000 --> 00:36:23,000
I'm not gonna be a dumb stone.

1075
00:36:23,000 --> 00:36:25,000
The deed is done.

1076
00:36:25,000 --> 00:36:27,000
No, well, I mean, that sounds like you're in Boys Town again.

1077
00:36:27,000 --> 00:36:29,000
We have to pick you up in the van.

1078
00:36:29,000 --> 00:36:31,000
The deed is done.

1079
00:36:31,000 --> 00:36:33,000
As you wipe off the day's work.

1080
00:36:33,000 --> 00:36:35,000
Oh, man.

1081
00:36:35,000 --> 00:36:37,000
I love it.

1082
00:36:37,000 --> 00:36:39,000
Just thinking about you rollerblading down there

1083
00:36:39,000 --> 00:36:41,000
with your jeans shorts, pockets hanging out.

1084
00:36:41,000 --> 00:36:43,000
Ah, shit, man.

1085
00:36:43,000 --> 00:36:45,000
Dude, with that mustache, man,

1086
00:36:45,000 --> 00:36:47,000
you could get into a gay bar without paying.

1087
00:36:47,000 --> 00:36:49,000
I know, I know.

1088
00:36:49,000 --> 00:36:51,000
You could get into a gay bar without paying usually anyway.

1089
00:36:51,000 --> 00:36:53,000
Oh, I mean, you know, people there, so I mean...

1090
00:36:53,000 --> 00:36:55,000
I mean,

1091
00:36:55,000 --> 00:36:57,000
guys think I'm just as cute as girls do.

1092
00:36:57,000 --> 00:36:59,000
How do you know this?

1093
00:36:59,000 --> 00:37:01,000
Well, I get hit on by a lot of

1094
00:37:01,000 --> 00:37:03,000
cute guys, what can I tell ya?

1095
00:37:03,000 --> 00:37:05,000
Let's clip that

1096
00:37:05,000 --> 00:37:07,000
and send it, baby.

1097
00:37:07,000 --> 00:37:09,000
But he's not gonna get into the other half of that,

1098
00:37:09,000 --> 00:37:11,000
aren't you?

1099
00:37:11,000 --> 00:37:13,000
I was hit on them,

1100
00:37:13,000 --> 00:37:15,000
and then we were making out by the grease trap.

1101
00:37:15,000 --> 00:37:17,000
Although, one time...

1102
00:37:17,000 --> 00:37:19,000
That's the name of the club you guys hung out at.

1103
00:37:19,000 --> 00:37:21,000
One time when we were on tour,

1104
00:37:21,000 --> 00:37:23,000
and this guy was,

1105
00:37:23,000 --> 00:37:25,000
I don't know what city we were in,

1106
00:37:25,000 --> 00:37:27,000
like Philadelphia or Detroit

1107
00:37:27,000 --> 00:37:29,000
or somewhere and fucking...

1108
00:37:29,000 --> 00:37:31,000
Allegedly.

1109
00:37:31,000 --> 00:37:33,000
And I had no money,

1110
00:37:33,000 --> 00:37:35,000
and I wanted to fucking drink,

1111
00:37:35,000 --> 00:37:37,000
and I pretended I was gay,

1112
00:37:37,000 --> 00:37:39,000
because I knew the bartender was gay,

1113
00:37:39,000 --> 00:37:41,000
and he fucking saw right through it.

1114
00:37:41,000 --> 00:37:43,000
You loved it.

1115
00:37:43,000 --> 00:37:45,000
No, he fucking saw right through it,

1116
00:37:45,000 --> 00:37:47,000
and he was like, gay, sorry.

1117
00:37:47,000 --> 00:37:49,000
And I was like, fuck, man.

1118
00:37:49,000 --> 00:37:51,000
Yeah, because you exude this manhood.

1119
00:37:51,000 --> 00:37:53,000
Fuck off.

1120
00:37:53,000 --> 00:37:55,000
I mean, right now,

1121
00:37:55,000 --> 00:37:57,000
you're like a...

1122
00:37:57,000 --> 00:37:59,000
What's that drug called? Pervitin?

1123
00:37:59,000 --> 00:38:01,000
That would be...

1124
00:38:01,000 --> 00:38:03,000
Pervitin.

1125
00:38:03,000 --> 00:38:05,000
You're a drug, you'd be pervitin.

1126
00:38:05,000 --> 00:38:07,000
Just knocking kids out all the time.

1127
00:38:09,000 --> 00:38:11,000
You'd be that guy with the fake flower.

1128
00:38:11,000 --> 00:38:13,000
They could smell my flower.

1129
00:38:13,000 --> 00:38:15,000
Oh, man.

1130
00:38:17,000 --> 00:38:21,000
Loading him into my lawyer's fucking Hyundai?

1131
00:38:21,000 --> 00:38:23,000
Whatever she did.

1132
00:38:25,000 --> 00:38:27,000
Ah, shit, man. It's just like deer.

1133
00:38:27,000 --> 00:38:29,000
You're making me sound like a weirdo,

1134
00:38:29,000 --> 00:38:31,000
just because I fucking give a mustache.

1135
00:38:31,000 --> 00:38:33,000
Doesn't mean I fucking...

1136
00:38:33,000 --> 00:38:35,000
That mustache speaks louder than words.

1137
00:38:37,000 --> 00:38:39,000
People hide their children when they see that mustache.

1138
00:38:39,000 --> 00:38:41,000
You know what's funny?

1139
00:38:41,000 --> 00:38:43,000
I went and worked the election

1140
00:38:43,000 --> 00:38:45,000
the other day with Mary.

1141
00:38:45,000 --> 00:38:47,000
Oh, yeah, how was that?

1142
00:38:47,000 --> 00:38:49,000
That was fucking pretty fun, man.

1143
00:38:49,000 --> 00:38:51,000
We had some good times. It was one girl that was...

1144
00:38:51,000 --> 00:38:53,000
You had some... Okay, wait.

1145
00:38:53,000 --> 00:38:55,000
Let's explain before we get too far.

1146
00:38:55,000 --> 00:38:57,000
Okay.

1147
00:38:57,000 --> 00:38:59,000
So locally...

1148
00:38:59,000 --> 00:39:01,000
No, well, it was also the Chicago Mayor Arlala election.

1149
00:39:01,000 --> 00:39:03,000
But locally you went...

1150
00:39:03,000 --> 00:39:05,000
Locally you went to a voting polling station.

1151
00:39:05,000 --> 00:39:07,000
I was a polling...

1152
00:39:07,000 --> 00:39:09,000
And so was Mary, my lawyer.

1153
00:39:09,000 --> 00:39:11,000
And so was my wife.

1154
00:39:11,000 --> 00:39:13,000
And it was pretty cool.

1155
00:39:13,000 --> 00:39:15,000
We had to be there from 5 a.m.

1156
00:39:15,000 --> 00:39:17,000
to fucking 7.30 at night.

1157
00:39:17,000 --> 00:39:19,000
Did you get stoned?

1158
00:39:19,000 --> 00:39:21,000
Yeah, I went outside and got high four times.

1159
00:39:21,000 --> 00:39:23,000
Where were at in the car?

1160
00:39:23,000 --> 00:39:25,000
It was just in front of the building.

1161
00:39:25,000 --> 00:39:27,000
Well, I kind of had to go in the car

1162
00:39:27,000 --> 00:39:29,000
because it was in front of...

1163
00:39:29,000 --> 00:39:31,000
Plus there was other people that was going on

1164
00:39:31,000 --> 00:39:33,000
to have cigarettes.

1165
00:39:33,000 --> 00:39:35,000
And I couldn't really smoke a joint while.

1166
00:39:35,000 --> 00:39:37,000
I was having a cigarette.

1167
00:39:37,000 --> 00:39:39,000
Why not? I'm a polling judge.

1168
00:39:39,000 --> 00:39:41,000
If I would have known him as good as I did

1169
00:39:41,000 --> 00:39:43,000
at the end of the day and the beginning of the day,

1170
00:39:43,000 --> 00:39:45,000
I would have.

1171
00:39:45,000 --> 00:39:47,000
That's probably the highest statue you've ever held as polling judge.

1172
00:39:47,000 --> 00:39:49,000
It's the second time we did it, too, man.

1173
00:39:49,000 --> 00:39:51,000
And it was pretty fucking fun.

1174
00:39:51,000 --> 00:39:53,000
Did you like it, Mayor?

1175
00:39:53,000 --> 00:39:55,000
But the funny thing is none of them noticed my mustache.

1176
00:39:55,000 --> 00:39:57,000
Even the one lady told me I was good looking.

1177
00:39:57,000 --> 00:39:59,000
Mayor, get that prick maybe mobile.

1178
00:39:59,000 --> 00:40:01,000
I'll grab it, Mayor.

1179
00:40:01,000 --> 00:40:03,000
Okay, so what you said though that...

1180
00:40:03,000 --> 00:40:05,000
One lady...

1181
00:40:05,000 --> 00:40:07,000
One lady even told me I was good looking

1182
00:40:07,000 --> 00:40:09,000
and she didn't even notice I was a good looking mustache.

1183
00:40:09,000 --> 00:40:11,000
Oh my God, was she blind?

1184
00:40:11,000 --> 00:40:13,000
She had a good mustache.

1185
00:40:13,000 --> 00:40:15,000
She was probably...

1186
00:40:15,000 --> 00:40:17,000
No, she had fucking 20-20 vision.

1187
00:40:17,000 --> 00:40:19,000
How do you know?

1188
00:40:19,000 --> 00:40:21,000
Because I looked through her glasses.

1189
00:40:21,000 --> 00:40:23,000
You did what?

1190
00:40:23,000 --> 00:40:25,000
She said he was a good looking.

1191
00:40:25,000 --> 00:40:27,000
Yeah, and then she saw a stash and she was like,

1192
00:40:27,000 --> 00:40:29,000
stay away from my children.

1193
00:40:29,000 --> 00:40:31,000
She's like,

1194
00:40:31,000 --> 00:40:33,000
that thing is illegal in 42 states.

1195
00:40:33,000 --> 00:40:35,000
Nah, man.

1196
00:40:35,000 --> 00:40:37,000
You're a Florida man with that stash.

1197
00:40:37,000 --> 00:40:39,000
Fuck yeah, baby.

1198
00:40:39,000 --> 00:40:41,000
Actually, there was a lady there that goes to Florida

1199
00:40:41,000 --> 00:40:43,000
obviously all the time because you could tell

1200
00:40:43,000 --> 00:40:45,000
because of her...

1201
00:40:45,000 --> 00:40:47,000
10. Yeah, and she was real nice.

1202
00:40:47,000 --> 00:40:49,000
Did she give a lot of jewelry on?

1203
00:40:49,000 --> 00:40:51,000
Did she? Yeah, she did.

1204
00:40:51,000 --> 00:40:53,000
Yeah, she smelled good.

1205
00:40:53,000 --> 00:40:55,000
Did she? Yeah.

1206
00:40:55,000 --> 00:40:57,000
Probably.

1207
00:40:57,000 --> 00:40:59,000
She was older for sure.

1208
00:40:59,000 --> 00:41:01,000
She was a good mom. You're a sugar baby.

1209
00:41:01,000 --> 00:41:03,000
I need a sugar mama. She was definitely a sugar mama.

1210
00:41:03,000 --> 00:41:05,000
I want to follow Larry's footsteps.

1211
00:41:05,000 --> 00:41:07,000
Should I kick him in the balls, Mary?

1212
00:41:07,000 --> 00:41:09,000
Right now, you can't...

1213
00:41:09,000 --> 00:41:11,000
We need a visual aspect for that.

1214
00:41:11,000 --> 00:41:13,000
No, we don't.

1215
00:41:13,000 --> 00:41:15,000
And you're talking to my lawyer.

1216
00:41:15,000 --> 00:41:17,000
My wife wants me...

1217
00:41:17,000 --> 00:41:19,000
You're talking to my lawyer. Should I kick your client in the balls?

1218
00:41:19,000 --> 00:41:21,000
No.

1219
00:41:21,000 --> 00:41:23,000
She wants me to kick you in the balls.

1220
00:41:23,000 --> 00:41:25,000
She didn't say I don't suggest that either.

1221
00:41:25,000 --> 00:41:27,000
She didn't.

1222
00:41:27,000 --> 00:41:29,000
That's why I'm asking.

1223
00:41:29,000 --> 00:41:31,000
Hey, Larry, we should get Mary a driving class.

1224
00:41:31,000 --> 00:41:33,000
A day before...

1225
00:41:33,000 --> 00:41:35,000
in video tape.

1226
00:41:35,000 --> 00:41:37,000
She got a D.

1227
00:41:37,000 --> 00:41:39,000
She got a DUI.

1228
00:41:39,000 --> 00:41:41,000
That's going to be when we get the cable for our special.

1229
00:41:41,000 --> 00:41:43,000
We'll take her to driver's ad

1230
00:41:43,000 --> 00:41:45,000
and then we'll go get a fucking drive.

1231
00:41:45,000 --> 00:41:47,000
We'll go to the DMV.

1232
00:41:47,000 --> 00:41:49,000
Yeah.

1233
00:41:49,000 --> 00:41:51,000
No, we can't go to the DMV.

1234
00:41:51,000 --> 00:41:53,000
That's a government establishment.

1235
00:41:53,000 --> 00:41:55,000
We'll just go a pay for a driving class

1236
00:41:55,000 --> 00:41:57,000
and Mary gets to drive with the guy.

1237
00:41:57,000 --> 00:41:59,000
She just got her kids back

1238
00:41:59,000 --> 00:42:01,000
and she got her license back.

1239
00:42:01,000 --> 00:42:03,000
She goes

1240
00:42:03,000 --> 00:42:05,000
and runs errands.

1241
00:42:05,000 --> 00:42:07,000
No, she runs errands.

1242
00:42:07,000 --> 00:42:09,000
She goes to Walmart and leaves the guy in the car.

1243
00:42:11,000 --> 00:42:13,000
During her driving thing.

1244
00:42:13,000 --> 00:42:15,000
Driving class.

1245
00:42:15,000 --> 00:42:17,000
That's a good idea.

1246
00:42:17,000 --> 00:42:19,000
And you and I just sit in the back.

1247
00:42:19,000 --> 00:42:21,000
We don't know what she's doing in there.

1248
00:42:21,000 --> 00:42:23,000
Why are we at Walgreens?

1249
00:42:23,000 --> 00:42:25,000
I don't know, man.

1250
00:42:25,000 --> 00:42:27,000
You guys can't smoke weed in here.

1251
00:42:27,000 --> 00:42:29,000
Hey, Mary, could you hand me the backpack?

1252
00:42:29,000 --> 00:42:31,000
Why?

1253
00:42:31,000 --> 00:42:33,000
It's hanging on the guitar stand there

1254
00:42:33,000 --> 00:42:35,000
because I want some M&M's.

1255
00:42:35,000 --> 00:42:37,000
I mean, kill you.

1256
00:42:37,000 --> 00:42:39,000
You're talking all about Walgreens over and over.

1257
00:42:39,000 --> 00:42:41,000
I just talked about Walgreens and you thought about M&M.

1258
00:42:41,000 --> 00:42:43,000
You're a fucking junkie.

1259
00:42:43,000 --> 00:42:45,000
Jesus.

1260
00:42:45,000 --> 00:42:47,000
As a west side, you're like heroin.

1261
00:42:47,000 --> 00:42:49,000
Let's go.

1262
00:42:49,000 --> 00:42:51,000
Here, honey.

1263
00:42:51,000 --> 00:42:53,000
Now we're just playing the M&M game.

1264
00:42:53,000 --> 00:42:55,000
Just hang it right there.

1265
00:42:55,000 --> 00:42:57,000
Yeah, perfect.

1266
00:42:57,000 --> 00:42:59,000
Well, no, she can't reach it, man.

1267
00:42:59,000 --> 00:43:01,000
Okay, I'm going upstairs.

1268
00:43:01,000 --> 00:43:03,000
All right, doll.

1269
00:43:03,000 --> 00:43:05,000
I'm glad you came down here.

1270
00:43:05,000 --> 00:43:07,000
I didn't drink that.

1271
00:43:07,000 --> 00:43:09,000
Yep.

1272
00:43:09,000 --> 00:43:11,000
I'm going to put the rags in the dryer.

1273
00:43:11,000 --> 00:43:13,000
Okay.

1274
00:43:13,000 --> 00:43:15,000
And then there's a laundry basket of art clean clothes.

1275
00:43:15,000 --> 00:43:17,000
This is great content.

1276
00:43:17,000 --> 00:43:19,000
Amazing.

1277
00:43:19,000 --> 00:43:21,000
In case you didn't hear that.

1278
00:43:21,000 --> 00:43:23,000
Yeah, I know.

1279
00:43:23,000 --> 00:43:25,000
Larry couldn't even carry a laundry basket up there.

1280
00:43:25,000 --> 00:43:27,000
I need to carry a laundry basket up and put some things in the dryer.

1281
00:43:27,000 --> 00:43:29,000
But he could carry a child if you know what I mean.

1282
00:43:29,000 --> 00:43:31,000
Oh, fuck you, man.

1283
00:43:31,000 --> 00:43:33,000
That must be a...

1284
00:43:33,000 --> 00:43:35,000
Needles is a fucking asshole if you know what I mean.

1285
00:43:35,000 --> 00:43:37,000
That must be a strength around playgrounds.

1286
00:43:37,000 --> 00:43:39,000
Yeah.

1287
00:43:43,000 --> 00:43:45,000
Who even thinks of this shit except the weirdo?

1288
00:43:45,000 --> 00:43:47,000
I do right now.

1289
00:43:47,000 --> 00:43:49,000
That's what I'm saying is live.

1290
00:43:49,000 --> 00:43:51,000
Well, it's not really live,

1291
00:43:51,000 --> 00:43:53,000
but it's just very silly to think of you

1292
00:43:53,000 --> 00:43:55,000
and that weirdo mustache.

1293
00:43:55,000 --> 00:43:57,000
I mean, Jesus Christ, man.

1294
00:43:57,000 --> 00:43:59,000
Do you really look at yourself in the face and you're like,

1295
00:43:59,000 --> 00:44:01,000
Yeah, you know what's funny?

1296
00:44:01,000 --> 00:44:03,000
I'm starting to get used to it.

1297
00:44:03,000 --> 00:44:05,000
Like the first day I was laughing every time I looked in the mirror.

1298
00:44:05,000 --> 00:44:07,000
And then the second day I forgot I had it

1299
00:44:07,000 --> 00:44:09,000
and I scared myself in the morning when I washed my face.

1300
00:44:09,000 --> 00:44:11,000
I was like, whoa.

1301
00:44:11,000 --> 00:44:13,000
And now I'm like the third day I was like, hey, man, it's starting to look pretty dope.

1302
00:44:13,000 --> 00:44:15,000
And you know what the best is?

1303
00:44:15,000 --> 00:44:17,000
I'm just gonna put a little bit of a mustache

1304
00:44:17,000 --> 00:44:19,000
and a tooth on the bottom.

1305
00:44:19,000 --> 00:44:21,000
Can you incorporate that with

1306
00:44:21,000 --> 00:44:23,000
pedophile mustache?

1307
00:44:27,000 --> 00:44:29,000
I mean, Jesus Christ, Larry.

1308
00:44:29,000 --> 00:44:31,000
If somebody made a composite drawing,

1309
00:44:31,000 --> 00:44:33,000
you fit half of them.

1310
00:44:37,000 --> 00:44:39,000
That's what we do for our fans.

1311
00:44:39,000 --> 00:44:41,000
Please make a composite drawing of what you think Larry looks like.

1312
00:44:41,000 --> 00:44:43,000
And we'll put it up in the local post office.

1313
00:44:43,000 --> 00:44:45,000
Oh my God.

1314
00:44:45,000 --> 00:44:47,000
That'd be very funny.

1315
00:44:51,000 --> 00:44:53,000
That's all right though.

1316
00:44:53,000 --> 00:44:55,000
That tooth will grow back, right Larry?

1317
00:44:55,000 --> 00:44:57,000
We have faith in it.

1318
00:44:57,000 --> 00:44:59,000
Totally.

1319
00:44:59,000 --> 00:45:01,000
Could you get, if you pray, if everybody prays.

1320
00:45:01,000 --> 00:45:03,000
Oh, now we're talking about Jesus.

1321
00:45:05,000 --> 00:45:07,000
The power of the Lord, my tooth could come back man.

1322
00:45:07,000 --> 00:45:09,000
Dude, I love Jesus.

1323
00:45:09,000 --> 00:45:11,000
Me too. So much man.

1324
00:45:11,000 --> 00:45:13,000
He gave me herpes and he's not calling me back.

1325
00:45:13,000 --> 00:45:15,000
Oh my God.

1326
00:45:15,000 --> 00:45:17,000
This fucking guy won't even call me back there.

1327
00:45:19,000 --> 00:45:21,000
The son of God gave me herpes.

1328
00:45:21,000 --> 00:45:23,000
This guy's gonna burn.

1329
00:45:23,000 --> 00:45:25,000
Oh my God.

1330
00:45:25,000 --> 00:45:27,000
Please Lord, forgive this dummy.

1331
00:45:27,000 --> 00:45:29,000
He doesn't know what he's doing.

1332
00:45:29,000 --> 00:45:31,000
Oh my God.

1333
00:45:31,000 --> 00:45:33,000
Dude, he won't even call me back.

1334
00:45:33,000 --> 00:45:35,000
I mean, you think the son of God doesn't have herpes, but.

1335
00:45:35,000 --> 00:45:37,000
How many horses do you think Jesus banged?

1336
00:45:37,000 --> 00:45:39,000
Oh man.

1337
00:45:39,000 --> 00:45:41,000
He looked around with mostly horses.

1338
00:45:41,000 --> 00:45:43,000
Huh?

1339
00:45:43,000 --> 00:45:45,000
Well, Mary Magdalene was a whore.

1340
00:45:45,000 --> 00:45:47,000
Well, I don't know if I'd say that about her.

1341
00:45:47,000 --> 00:45:49,000
Well, I mean, I just did.

1342
00:45:49,000 --> 00:45:51,000
Are you gonna?

1343
00:45:51,000 --> 00:45:53,000
I don't know.

1344
00:45:53,000 --> 00:45:55,000
I don't know the facts totally.

1345
00:45:55,000 --> 00:45:57,000
I mean, the facts are the Bible's a made up book.

1346
00:45:57,000 --> 00:45:59,000
Oh man, now you're really gonna burn in hell.

1347
00:45:59,000 --> 00:46:01,000
You keep doing this.

1348
00:46:01,000 --> 00:46:03,000
What is that?

1349
00:46:03,000 --> 00:46:05,000
The problem is that you keep on saying I'm gonna burn in hell

1350
00:46:05,000 --> 00:46:07,000
and now Jesus' ears tingle.

1351
00:46:07,000 --> 00:46:09,000
That's not a problem.

1352
00:46:09,000 --> 00:46:11,000
You can't just call your boy out.

1353
00:46:11,000 --> 00:46:13,000
You can't hear you.

1354
00:46:13,000 --> 00:46:15,000
You can't multiply say you're gonna burn in hell.

1355
00:46:15,000 --> 00:46:17,000
His ears are tingling because he hears me trying to tell him,

1356
00:46:17,000 --> 00:46:19,000
please Lord, don't fucking send the old soul.

1357
00:46:19,000 --> 00:46:21,000
Please Jesus, don't fucking finger bang children.

1358
00:46:21,000 --> 00:46:23,000
Oh man.

1359
00:46:23,000 --> 00:46:25,000
I mean, the Catholics are, they love the boys.

1360
00:46:25,000 --> 00:46:27,000
Yeah, but Jesus is in Catholic.

1361
00:46:27,000 --> 00:46:29,000
No, they love children.

1362
00:46:29,000 --> 00:46:31,000
Jesus is in Catholic.

1363
00:46:31,000 --> 00:46:33,000
Okay.

1364
00:46:33,000 --> 00:46:35,000
And I think they're part of it.

1365
00:46:35,000 --> 00:46:37,000
I mean, Jesus is in Catholic.

1366
00:46:37,000 --> 00:46:39,000
Right. Is that what I just said?

1367
00:46:39,000 --> 00:46:41,000
Yeah, you just said that three times.

1368
00:46:41,000 --> 00:46:43,000
I'm so fucking high.

1369
00:46:43,000 --> 00:46:45,000
Dude, the M&M's are getting you fucking up.

1370
00:46:45,000 --> 00:46:47,000
I got a sugar high.

1371
00:46:47,000 --> 00:46:49,000
I think I'm having a stroke, man.

1372
00:46:49,000 --> 00:46:51,000
Larry's gonna start kissing kids.

1373
00:46:51,000 --> 00:46:53,000
Oh fuck you, man.

1374
00:46:53,000 --> 00:46:55,000
Luckily there's a playground in fucking thousands of doors.

1375
00:46:55,000 --> 00:46:57,000
But that's gonna be the parameters next time.

1376
00:46:57,000 --> 00:46:59,000
We're gonna have to hire a construction crew

1377
00:46:59,000 --> 00:47:01,000
to move the playground.

1378
00:47:01,000 --> 00:47:03,000
So we can still podcast.

1379
00:47:03,000 --> 00:47:05,000
Right.

1380
00:47:05,000 --> 00:47:07,000
So they go, literally, we can't be around them.

1381
00:47:07,000 --> 00:47:09,000
We can't have any live like less than fucking 300 feet

1382
00:47:09,000 --> 00:47:11,000
from the playground.

1383
00:47:11,000 --> 00:47:13,000
But I know that's what I'm saying.

1384
00:47:13,000 --> 00:47:15,000
We're gonna have to hire a construction crew

1385
00:47:15,000 --> 00:47:17,000
to move it. So we can podcast.

1386
00:47:17,000 --> 00:47:19,000
I'm allowed to go anywhere, man.

1387
00:47:19,000 --> 00:47:21,000
I have no, I'm not.

1388
00:47:21,000 --> 00:47:23,000
Well, I mean, until the feds hear this.

1389
00:47:23,000 --> 00:47:25,000
I'm not a fucking, I'm not a sex plender of any kind.

1390
00:47:25,000 --> 00:47:27,000
Yeah, that's what a sex pervert doesn't say.

1391
00:47:27,000 --> 00:47:29,000
I don't like kids.

1392
00:47:29,000 --> 00:47:31,000
They disgust me.

1393
00:47:31,000 --> 00:47:33,000
They disgust me.

1394
00:47:33,000 --> 00:47:35,000
Real American hero.

1395
00:47:35,000 --> 00:47:37,000
Real American hero.

1396
00:47:37,000 --> 00:47:39,000
Real American hero.

1397
00:47:39,000 --> 00:47:41,000
I tell you.

1398
00:47:41,000 --> 00:47:43,000
Oh my gosh.

1399
00:47:43,000 --> 00:47:45,000
Stereotypical.

1400
00:47:45,000 --> 00:47:47,000
Epipy, bud-lating children.

1401
00:47:47,000 --> 00:47:49,000
You can't change a book by the cover.

1402
00:47:49,000 --> 00:47:51,000
Yes, you can.

1403
00:47:51,000 --> 00:47:53,000
But that mustache, oh my god.

1404
00:47:53,000 --> 00:47:55,000
That blows your cover.

1405
00:47:55,000 --> 00:47:57,000
I'm telling you, man.

1406
00:47:57,000 --> 00:47:59,000
All I see is your lips going through a chain link fence.

1407
00:47:59,000 --> 00:48:01,000
Children.

1408
00:48:01,000 --> 00:48:03,000
I don't know where you just...

1409
00:48:03,000 --> 00:48:05,000
You look like a puffer fish.

1410
00:48:05,000 --> 00:48:07,000
Chain link fence shit.

1411
00:48:07,000 --> 00:48:09,000
All right, daddy.

1412
00:48:09,000 --> 00:48:11,000
Larry's wearing a shirt that says daddy at it.

1413
00:48:11,000 --> 00:48:13,000
And he doesn't want me to believe

1414
00:48:13,000 --> 00:48:15,000
he's working in Boys Town every weekend.

1415
00:48:15,000 --> 00:48:17,000
This shirt says daddy 66.

1416
00:48:17,000 --> 00:48:19,000
Now listen. This is my friend.

1417
00:48:19,000 --> 00:48:21,000
Should be 69.

1418
00:48:21,000 --> 00:48:23,000
My friend Richie made this clothing line

1419
00:48:23,000 --> 00:48:25,000
and Dennis Rodman

1420
00:48:25,000 --> 00:48:27,000
started wearing it.

1421
00:48:27,000 --> 00:48:29,000
And so he's such a bullshitter

1422
00:48:29,000 --> 00:48:31,000
through Dennis Rodman

1423
00:48:31,000 --> 00:48:33,000
and somehow we got on entertainment tonight.

1424
00:48:33,000 --> 00:48:35,000
Our band.

1425
00:48:35,000 --> 00:48:37,000
Our band. Through this guy Richie.

1426
00:48:37,000 --> 00:48:39,000
Which band?

1427
00:48:39,000 --> 00:48:41,000
My old band with my brother.

1428
00:48:41,000 --> 00:48:43,000
We'll say it. Charlie's Pipetrain.

1429
00:48:43,000 --> 00:48:45,000
And it was through this daddy 66 wear.

1430
00:48:45,000 --> 00:48:47,000
Okay.

1431
00:48:47,000 --> 00:48:49,000
Oh my god. It is the most...

1432
00:48:49,000 --> 00:48:51,000
They came with TV cameras to my...

1433
00:48:51,000 --> 00:48:53,000
It's a thin cotton shirt.

1434
00:48:53,000 --> 00:48:55,000
It's really old.

1435
00:48:55,000 --> 00:48:57,000
It's like from the 90s.

1436
00:48:57,000 --> 00:48:59,000
It's from the 90s.

1437
00:48:59,000 --> 00:49:01,000
And it's like...

1438
00:49:01,000 --> 00:49:03,000
We had TV cameras in my mom's basement

1439
00:49:03,000 --> 00:49:05,000
while we were jamming.

1440
00:49:05,000 --> 00:49:07,000
Rocking out. Yeah. It was kick ass.

1441
00:49:07,000 --> 00:49:09,000
And then they did...

1442
00:49:09,000 --> 00:49:11,000
And then...

1443
00:49:11,000 --> 00:49:13,000
No, yeah. They didn't wait a second.

1444
00:49:13,000 --> 00:49:15,000
They did that was getting interviewed.

1445
00:49:15,000 --> 00:49:17,000
They did that stuff. He fucking posted in Playgirl magazine.

1446
00:49:17,000 --> 00:49:19,000
Really? Don't say it?

1447
00:49:19,000 --> 00:49:21,000
Billy. I'm not going to say his last name.

1448
00:49:21,000 --> 00:49:23,000
Oh, we should do with it.

1449
00:49:23,000 --> 00:49:25,000
I don't remember it.

1450
00:49:25,000 --> 00:49:27,000
And then there was this other kid...

1451
00:49:27,000 --> 00:49:29,000
Billy Gibhins?

1452
00:49:29,000 --> 00:49:31,000
God damn it.

1453
00:49:31,000 --> 00:49:33,000
Billy Gibhins.

1454
00:49:33,000 --> 00:49:35,000
And then there was this other kid and I can't remember his name.

1455
00:49:35,000 --> 00:49:37,000
I think it might have been Frankie.

1456
00:49:37,000 --> 00:49:39,000
And then they got interviewed

1457
00:49:39,000 --> 00:49:41,000
by entertainment tonight.

1458
00:49:41,000 --> 00:49:43,000
And they sat on my car.

1459
00:49:43,000 --> 00:49:45,000
Listen. They sat on my car.

1460
00:49:45,000 --> 00:49:47,000
Because it was such a beater.

1461
00:49:47,000 --> 00:49:49,000
You know?

1462
00:49:49,000 --> 00:49:51,000
I had this old fucking Buick

1463
00:49:51,000 --> 00:49:53,000
fucking like a 1971.

1464
00:49:53,000 --> 00:49:55,000
Perfect for picking children up.

1465
00:49:55,000 --> 00:49:57,000
It was yellow.

1466
00:49:57,000 --> 00:49:59,000
Looks like a school bus.

1467
00:49:59,000 --> 00:50:01,000
No. It was faded out.

1468
00:50:01,000 --> 00:50:03,000
It was faded out yellow.

1469
00:50:03,000 --> 00:50:05,000
It had a white rag top.

1470
00:50:05,000 --> 00:50:07,000
It had a Buick like a school bus.

1471
00:50:07,000 --> 00:50:09,000
It had a white rag top with all the black mold spots.

1472
00:50:09,000 --> 00:50:11,000
Yeah. You could tie them all down.

1473
00:50:11,000 --> 00:50:13,000
Fuck you.

1474
00:50:13,000 --> 00:50:15,000
It's an old Buick like a school bus.

1475
00:50:15,000 --> 00:50:17,000
Come on kids get in.

1476
00:50:17,000 --> 00:50:19,000
You got the stop sign on it.

1477
00:50:19,000 --> 00:50:21,000
So not only did I get on

1478
00:50:21,000 --> 00:50:23,000
on TV with my

1479
00:50:23,000 --> 00:50:25,000
orange Stratocaster.

1480
00:50:25,000 --> 00:50:27,000
Peanut or regular.

1481
00:50:27,000 --> 00:50:29,000
These are peanut butter.

1482
00:50:29,000 --> 00:50:31,000
Ooh. Look at you.

1483
00:50:31,000 --> 00:50:33,000
Fancy pants. That's a lot for a sugar baby.

1484
00:50:33,000 --> 00:50:35,000
Yeah. Well, you got to keep my sugar level high.

1485
00:50:35,000 --> 00:50:37,000
Yeah. For sugar baby.

1486
00:50:37,000 --> 00:50:39,000
For your sugar mama.

1487
00:50:39,000 --> 00:50:41,000
Uh huh.

1488
00:50:41,000 --> 00:50:43,000
I could have watched my leftist self tonight.

1489
00:50:43,000 --> 00:50:45,000
He likes me sweet.

1490
00:50:45,000 --> 00:50:47,000
He'll jacked up.

1491
00:50:47,000 --> 00:50:49,000
When I tell everybody

1492
00:50:49,000 --> 00:50:51,000
that Hunter was right.

1493
00:50:51,000 --> 00:50:53,000
Oh man.

1494
00:50:53,000 --> 00:50:55,000
You missed the joke.

1495
00:50:55,000 --> 00:50:57,000
But.

1496
00:50:57,000 --> 00:50:59,000
But anyways. Yes.

1497
00:50:59,000 --> 00:51:01,000
That was a real good session dude.

1498
00:51:01,000 --> 00:51:03,000
I think we're coming to a close here and uh.

1499
00:51:03,000 --> 00:51:05,000
Oh. Now you're just controlling the pod leery?

1500
00:51:05,000 --> 00:51:07,000
Yeah. Dude I'm the fucking guy.

1501
00:51:07,000 --> 00:51:09,000
I mean what do you do? You can stop a wall of a sudden?

1502
00:51:09,000 --> 00:51:11,000
Yeah. Jesus.

1503
00:51:11,000 --> 00:51:13,000
You're gonna be fucking like eight times.

1504
00:51:13,000 --> 00:51:15,000
What does that mean?

1505
00:51:15,000 --> 00:51:17,000
It's gonna be someone gonna be Gestapo.

1506
00:51:17,000 --> 00:51:19,000
It's gonna be me. Just because you've been there eight times?

1507
00:51:19,000 --> 00:51:21,000
It started fucking rubbing off.

1508
00:51:21,000 --> 00:51:23,000
So now you're a Nazi leery?

1509
00:51:23,000 --> 00:51:25,000
No. I mean Jesus. You just said you were.

1510
00:51:25,000 --> 00:51:27,000
Just the efficiency part.

1511
00:51:27,000 --> 00:51:29,000
I mean don't fucking

1512
00:51:29,000 --> 00:51:31,000
say that on the podcast you're a Nazi.

1513
00:51:33,000 --> 00:51:35,000
I mean that's not good for listeners.

1514
00:51:35,000 --> 00:51:37,000
So.

1515
00:51:37,000 --> 00:51:39,000
To our Jewish contingents.

1516
00:51:39,000 --> 00:51:41,000
We love you.

1517
00:51:41,000 --> 00:51:43,000
And.

1518
00:51:43,000 --> 00:51:45,000
To all our contingents.

1519
00:51:45,000 --> 00:51:47,000
We love everybody.

1520
00:51:47,000 --> 00:51:49,000
Whatever contingents means. We love you.

1521
00:51:49,000 --> 00:51:51,000
Aw man.

1522
00:51:51,000 --> 00:51:53,000
Like I said Larry's gonna go kiss children.

1523
00:51:53,000 --> 00:51:55,000
The perpetendi's not a Nazi.

1524
00:51:55,000 --> 00:51:57,000
No.

1525
00:51:57,000 --> 00:51:59,000
You gotta distract one from the other.

1526
00:51:59,000 --> 00:52:01,000
Right. You know what I mean.

1527
00:52:01,000 --> 00:52:03,000
And thank you for tuning in to the Larry and Neal show.

1528
00:52:03,000 --> 00:52:05,000
Have a good night.

1529
00:52:05,000 --> 00:52:07,000
I'm Larry.

1530
00:52:07,000 --> 00:52:09,000
I'm Larry Parker.

1531
00:52:13,000 --> 00:52:15,000
You fucking do that to me man.

1532
00:52:15,000 --> 00:52:17,000
I love doing it.

1533
00:52:17,000 --> 00:52:19,000
It's my favorite.

1534
00:52:19,000 --> 00:52:21,000
This is all stating it too.

1535
00:52:21,000 --> 00:52:23,000
I'm gonna shit every time.

1536
00:52:23,000 --> 00:52:25,000
I almost said I'm needles.

1537
00:52:25,000 --> 00:52:27,000
I know that's what I'm trying to get.

1538
00:52:27,000 --> 00:52:37,000
Larry good night. Thank you.