Time to get ready for the Larry and Needles Show.
Alright, hey everybody. Welcome to the Larry
and Needles Show. I'm Larry. And I am Needles.
How about this? Whipping Tom of 1681 was the
nickname given to a serial spanker in London.
Whipping Tom. He would wait for an unaccompanied
woman, grab her, and might do it. I'm shrooming
too, so my words are a little bit going from
me. I like those prostitutes. Wait a second.
Hold on, wait. Actually, let's go to Deco. You
like the prostitutes? I like those prostitutes
that Jack the Ripper killed. Those, like, they're
kind of fat. They're hot. I like them from back
then. You like chubby ladies? Is that what you're
trying to say? Yeah. In an unsuspecting way?
Yeah. And then using Jack the Ripper for some
reason? No, I just, every time they showed one
of those prostitutes that he killed, I'd always
think, man... First of all, they didn't show
him it was a rendering of a drawing. Oh yeah,
but any time I saw the drawings, I was always
like, man, that chick was kind of hot. You just
like chubby ladies in like, uh, the 16th or 15th
or 18th century garb. 19th century garb. I guess
so. You're a real knickers guy, aren't you? A
real knicker you are. Oh shit, can I get back
to my time to spanker? Yeah. All right. Whipping
Tom, that was the name. Whipping Tom. All right,
I'll read it again. Whipping Tom of uh, man.
London. Yeah, whatever. 1681 was the nickname
given to a serial spanker. 1681, he was doing
this. I think that's what it is. Man. I'm shrooming,
so my numbers might be jumbled, but there we
go. 1681, yeah. That is fucking great. He would
wait for an unaccompanied woman, kind of like
Larry Grabber, just like Larry, lift her dress.
Just like Larry. Before fleeing. I mean, this
might be you. Sounds just like If we drew a sketch
you'd probably look like Now listen though here
we go So here you just like Larry he would wait
for an unaccompanied woman grab her lift her
dress and slap her buttocks while shouting Spanko
Before fleeing he would yell spanko Just to let
everybody know I like that guy. What do you mean?
He sounds pretty fucking interesting There's
a lot of steps into doing this I mean which I
mean, you know, we've broke Spanko that's great.
That might be the title. It's like smoke. Oh
like the fucking Chats the what the chats those
boys from Australia. Oh, yeah that smoke break
video shit smoke. Oh, they're on spanko So vigilantes
would dress in women's clothing and patrol the
streets He was known to operate so they never
caught the spanko They probably could he could
probably tell a mile away the difference from
a fake fucking woman in a beer Well back then
who knows you know what I mean anything was going
but spanko was a good name for an album Those,
that's what, let's get back to those prostitutes.
Okay Larry, I know you're chomping at the bit.
There's no way that you'd mistake them for a
man. That's the thing, you know. What do you
mean? Back then, I mean, you had the Red Husky
ladies. Yeah, so there wasn't guy other guys
were stick then some broad had a bonnet on and
they wore all that bullshit around them You know
what I mean? Not the prostitutes man, not the
ladies of the night They're wearing skin tight
fucking things just like the whores do now like
fucking New York City in like the 80s and you're
comparing it to fucking I mean, what are you
talking about? They wore skin tight shit Yeah,
there's still hookers Yeah, okay, so now we agree
on something finally. Yes, there's still our
hookers. Yeah, but in the concept of your portraying
I don't think that they were tighter bonnets
and shit or whatever I don't even think they
wore anything. They just Bob partitioned up in
a whorehouse and Man, I think he was I think
they were ones that would be like yeah Yeah,
and I know sort of like, you know sluts hanging
around in the bar and stuff like that I mean,
that's any bar, right? Yeah. Any local bar has
its sluts. Yeah. Right? It's local sluts. That's
why we like it. Oh, Larry. The last time you
touched the Boo Van Halen was popular. Yeah.
But local sluts are fucking legend to every bar,
right? Yeah, well. Aren't they? I would think
so. What the fuck, Sigmund Freud over here? Jesus.
Well yeah, man. There's sluts at every bar. You
can tell them a mile away. They're usually cackling.
It's usually you. This is buying drinks. This
guy puts out. Whatever. Yeah. Ah, shit. So Spanko's
pretty fucking funny. Spanko. Don't know how
many women did he spanked up? How many women
did he spank? I don't know man. I don't think
they kept numbers back then. Well, they had to
fucking have some kind of copycat spanko Just
like a offshoot of spanko, yeah spanko jr. Sniffer
Farto, you know, I mean tell me back then too
Women were treated much more poorly than they
are now. You can just walk up to them and squeeze
them real hard in the stomach and the fart will
come out. Is that what you wanted to do? That's
what Farto did. I'm very happy that's the answer
you gave, because I was expecting a completely
different one. That's what Farto did. Well, I
had six slaves. Cheers to Spanko. He never fucking
got caught. Now, that's the album. Cheers to
Spanko. He got away with it. He fucking got all
that fucking luscious London. I did really elaborate
into Spanko's life after doing that. Yeah, but
he didn't get caught. That doesn't say he did
it. I'm assuming he did. Listen, if you're a
man... They say he didn't get caught. The lore
of this story is amazing, okay? Yeah, especially
because it was walk around just slapping ladies
bombs all day and you're so famous for doing
it. There we have it in the 1600s and people
are still talking about it. First of all, you
probably don't want to scream something out and
draw attention to yourself. That's the best part.
I mean, you're a perverted class 101. Yeah, always
be quiet. Yeah. It's the first thing they teach
you. ABQ. ABQs. Always be quiet. We're selling
that to an Israeli firm next. Yeah. So they can
collect all your data. ABQ. You know because
You don't want to attract attention to who? To
the authorities when you're fucking about to
spank somebody or something Well, why would you
bother you want to do it after the fact not before
the fact? Yeah, you don't yell spanko and then
slap No, no, no, you slap him at I was under
the impression that he was yelling it Simultaneously
as he was slapping him spanko spanko Nice britches.
And you're... And you're... And then he runs
away. And you're sick perverted. Fucking... Horrible
European fucking gulag mentality. You know. There's
rats in the streets running, there's a cobblestone...
And he's fucking hitting her in the ass going,
Spanko! You just hear the wheels from the fucking
cart going. Tuk tuk tuk tuk tuk tuk tuk tuk tuk
tuk tuk tuk tuk tuk tuk tuk tuk tuk tuk tuk tuk
tuk tuk tuk tuk tuk tuk tuk Yeah, you know what
I mean, maybe spanko was the spanker maybe Spanky
He was spanky. I Mean now just low -hanging fruit.
Come on Even spaulding didn't approve of that
one So fucking spanko was probably getting spanked
by his mom Because he was hitting women. That's
very Freudian because he's hitting women He didn't
go up to man and spank man. That would be hilarious.
Does the gay spank go? That's the copycat. He'd
just slap an old school dude. He'd get shot in
four seconds. He'd slap his ass. He'd be like,
boom, boom. Fucking quid. Fucking quid touch
me ass. Fucking knicker nanny. And knicker nanny
tried to touch me pookit. Tried to touch my jewels
if you know what I mean. Back then they didn't
give a fuck though. Nah, let's shoot you just
for fucking being there. I think guns were expensive
back then and it wasn't like they gave them out
to anybody. Well, they don't give them out to
anybody. I think they use the mozzie method.
Yeah. Stabby, stabby, stabby. Huh? Well, they
just get it, man. You get a gun when you're a
criminal. Motherfucker, they can make fucking
shivs in prison. You don't think they can make
them out here in the real world? You can order
them off of Amazon. A shiv? Yeah. I can go to
fucking Storm by a knife. I know. A knife is
more personal, too. Yeah. You know what I mean?
Like, oh, you go into a gun store, you're like,
my ex -wife cheated on me. It's like, be a real
man, go to the knife store. Yeah, well. You can
get that the same day. Fuck the knife store.
Go in the fucking drawer in the kitchen and grab
a steak knife. No, I don't want something serrated.
Why not? I want it clean. I don't think you're
thinking about that. John Rambo. I don't think
you're thinking about that. Huh? You're thinking
oh shit. I want me. I'm gonna have to live in
this house after she's gone after I blame it
on a black gentleman Usually does that's what
happens murders do that, huh? Huh? Well, it's
not even murders Yeah, honor killings seppuku
say I wouldn't call Nah, except because when
you kill yourself. And honor, it's more like
Indian, but you know what, I don't even know
what the fuck is an honor killing. Honor killing
is like, if your sister's a slut and fucks somebody.
So she's just being a woman. Before she's married
or something, and then you kill her and it's
okay. But the brothers get a turn before the
husband does. Right? Otherwise how's the husband
gonna know if she's any good? Larry, I swear
to God. She's got to ask the brothers. I love
you so much. You're the best. She's got to ask
the bro. They tell the husband her favorite moves.
All right. She likes it like this. Exactly. This
usually makes her howl for the moon. Squirt all
over What are you doing man? I don't know maybe
so pervert. I know you don't know what you're
doing Larry is Larry is in fucking gear three
right now. He's getting ready to go to gear four
kid eights mushrooms Got some PBRs in them Godzilla
PBR. I'm good. Whoo. I know you're good Larry
You're about to blast off just like flight 9
-eleven Mm -hmm. That was the 40th anniversary.
By the way, it was my brother No shirt Nick's
birthday the other day. Happy birthday, Nick.
Yep, keep a shirt on. And I told you about when
we stayed home. I was already out of school.
Yes, you told the story multitudes of times.
And he was staying home from school because it
was his birthday and we wanted to get high and
watch the space shuttle thing and then it blew
up. And then supposedly all those people got
killed and shit and... You know, I told you that
we high -fived each other and said yeah on your
birthday I mean if you just want to keep telling
the listeners this you've told me this story
like five thousand times but it's just the 40th
anniversary the other day and they talked about
all those people and I told Mary all those people
continued on in life and fucking Had a fucking
career and a lot of them didn't even change their
fucking names It continued on with the same fucking
the Challenger is a very very tough one you they
did the ultimate Psy op to kids your age They
carded the fucking thing in the classroom slow
down listen bulbs. Let's slow down first, okay?
They created the ultimate Psy op on That day
they brought a teacher in See now we didn't know
about it because it was the Catholic school.
They didn't even talk about it to us Went to
Catholic school. Oh you did. Okay, I guess I
was wrong as usual. Well, I don't know I guess
I was out of school. I was out of school I'd
have to ask my brother. I would have to ask my
brother cuz I was out of school already Literal
fucking Larry is really saving the pod right
now I'm gonna hit her, faggot. Fuck off. You
know, the Challenger is a very unpalatable one
for people to understand because there's so many
aspects that are going on with this, and there's
so many parallels and variables that can be in
accordance to what people show you for evidence,
shall I say, right? Mm -hmm. So then they show
the people that were in this flight, and then
they show the people... that they can collaborate,
that they assume that these people to be, and
like Larry said, some of them didn't even change
their names. No. There was a guy who started
this company, which was hilarious, and had like
a cow going up as a rocket and going up into
space. Yeah, yeah, even the logo in his company
was something to do with this fucking space shuttle.
You don't have a... I got one here. But yeah,
no. It was really ironic too, and even a couple
of them like, like online when they show... Like
the guy go up behind the lady and he's like,
hey Susan, and she turns around and she realizes
that he's not friendly, that he's gonna fucking
bust her or fucking get her with an I gotcha
question. She's gotta get her mace out. And she
fucking started running away from the guy and
he's like, why are you running away from me?
I just wanna talk to you about the... Would you
rather be dead? No. So then you play into the
lie. Yeah change a fucking name. Actually, you
know what? How about a portion paperclip Warner
von Braun? All these motherfuckers come over
here to start NASA, which there we go So then
we fucking so then we bring in word doesn't even
change his name makes the Rockets They fucking
do all their fucking shit. Because they said,
hey, aren't you the guy that made the fucking
V2 rockets that bombed London? Oh, it's not me,
mister. No, not me, mister. We want you. No.
No. And my German accent isn't that good, so
I don't know if that's good. That's probably
good, though. I ain't fine, fine. No, it's me,
mister. Oh, man. Let me see the paper. I deciphered
so much broken English from Germany in fucking...
I was after a while. Don't get sidetracked. No,
here's the thing. They said, yeah, you're the
guy that made those V2 rockets that fucking went
to England. Yes. Oh, OK, we want you because
you could make rockets that could go to the ocean.
Oh, the ocean. And yeah, but you can also make
rockets that will fool everybody and make them
think we're going to space. Warner Brown knew
we weren't going to the fucking moon. Come on.
I would love to introduce you to Larry's space
corner. Space is fake. And gay. We all know that.
Okay. And gay. But Larry, though, so if we brought
all these NASA scientists here, why did we try
to win the Cold War? Answer me. Wait, what? The
Cold War? Wait, why? Well, why do we try to win
the Cold War when we brought all these scientists
here? Right. You'd think we could just dominate
the world with all these scientists. We'd have
to go to the moon or the stars. Right. They knew
it. Let me tell you, they passed out Nazi scientists
like they were fucking - Candy. Yeah, exactly.
There was 100 ,000 of them came over here or
more. They went to Italy, Spain, France, the
fucking - None of them got in trouble. South
America, every continent you can ever think of.
Yeah. And they acclimated. Yeah. Unlike the muzzies.
No. They just blend it in. They blend it in,
and you didn't even know that the guy worked
at a fucking... I mean, every once in a while,
if you were a really cool dude, you'd just blast
Erika on the Bluetooth, and this guy would have
to come out and salute. Yeah. Something like
that. Yeah, that was a complete opposite of Erica,
but that's why I think I was doing the Canadian
fucking national You're doing the pollock version
Fuck where my skaters go Yeah, man, so Spaces
fake anybody that thinks we went to the moon
is out of their mind. I'll never forget. We were
watching the eclipse With norm and Roxanne if
you weren't glasses, were you? No, they had no
they had glass. I'm just staring at the and boards
was staring right at Going blind. Yeah, but you
get you get retarded waves off And we made them
laugh so to but that's great You get retarded
if you're with intent. He's like a retard beam.
Like a centrifuge or a lexicon. Yeah. Or performative
retard. Yeah. R .I .P. Don't enforce right foot.
I just thought that'd be funny. The woof woof.
His foot took over his whole body, actually.
His toenail started. His toenail took over his
whole body. His toenail started the rebellion
against his fucking plantar fasciitis. It was
a real front on four sides of war. It was a full
frontal attack. That's your favorite So Okay,
yeah, I mean, you're the boss. No, that's it.
They didn't go to space. Anybody that thinks
they did is fucking nuts. Shit, man, I apologize.
And those people, all those people, they had
to go through the rest of their life and pretend
like they died on this thing, but then continue
on teaching in the same fucking thing. It's like,
why the fuck would they wheel TVs in front of
all the kids? Yeah, that's the thing. That's
the proof that it's such bullshit. They fucking
blew up in front of us and then we gotta go to
fucking gym. You know, okay now I'll play volleyball
or something. Dodgeball. I hope it was dodgeball
that day. It's actually pretty good though. You
don't want to pushify us, right? Everybody's
like, because you know at that point in time
I don't really think I gave a fuck about the
NASA program. I didn't know anything about it.
Well, that's what they were trying to do is show
you guys that. But then they wanted to traumatize
you. You really want to be an astronaut. Yeah.
This is where we do a lot of our training We'll
be docking at four. Oh man, it is something I'm
totally buying. If they even made a gay porn
about the fucking International Space Station
docking with other bros. That's like the Stanley
Kubrick of porn right there. Oh god. That's so
fucking disgusting. Two thousand bum instead
of two thousand what? Chad, like, I hope you
like that one. Two thousand bombs. Two thousand
bombs. Oh, man, what a fruitcake you are. Dude,
it's a fucking joke. You know, I'm not a fucking
fruitcake. Yeah, I don't know about that. Sounds
like you want to try something on me. No, that's
your fucking homosexual fantasy. You beat me
out of it. Should we just talk about sports now?
So the guy who caught the ball last week looked
really good in tight pants. That was fucking
gay too. And then the other guy reached between
his legs and grabbed the ball. And then the other
guy bent over and they tackled each other. That
was hot. And then Will Smith made a song called
Girls Girls Girls. I love girls. I don't like
being in the studio You're like boy this guy
loves girls. Yeah. Yeah guys. I do I do And then
he fucking sings his little song and his wife
is having sex with some other rapper. First of
all, if you tell me you like girls, I believe
you. Sure But if you're making a song like that,
I don't know if I believe you You should cover
that. I like girls. It's gotta be a terrible
song. Why would you do that? Imagine sitting
in the fucking recording studio. Is that what
it's called? I like girls. Something like that
shit, man. That guy's a finuck. I don't care
what anyone says. That broad looks like a cue
ball. How about the fucking... Why would you
slap a fucking... I mean... How about the...
He slapped Chris Rock, right? What did Chris
Rock ever do wrong? He put his name in her mouth,
cause in the black community, I think that's
like a number one felony, that's like a tier
one felony. If you put, so stay with me right
here, I'll explain this, okay? So, your name
is Shaniqua, okay? There we go, alright, lookit,
you're already playing the part, I like that
Larry, good job. So then your name is Shaniqua.
And I just got my nails done, motherfucker, and
you didn't say nothing about it. Slow down, slow
down Shaniqua, typical behavior. Completely typical
behavior. Won't even let me finish. You didn't
say nothing about my nails yet. I didn't call
the cops yet. Relax. All right. Calm down. Now
all of a sudden Tyrone comes over. I know him.
Well, I mean, Tyrone is your baby daddy. But
obviously you don't want to look good for your
baby daddy. Do you hear that? And I mean, the
little Spalding right here is caught in between.
The love triangle. I don't know, I mean he's
a baby but not really a love triangle. Caught
in a love triangle. Stop using that baby to slap
your pussy. Aw man. He's not a real baby though.
Alright aw man. Me rubber so tight. Okay, we're
already in this scenario. So you gotta keep the
name out your fucking mouth. Oh, yeah So then
because we're typical of black women though.
It's like, you know Keep your name out. I can't
even pronounce your fucking name. Yeah, it's
difficult to fucking keep it out of my mouth
sneak what you're lucky if that's what it is.
One of them's got an apostrophe. Yeah, someone's
got a fucking tilde in there. It's like a hyphen.
And then some sort of fucking... Some umlauts
and shit. Umlauts. This bitch got umlauts in
her name. Yeah. She's a little German. She's
got a little umlaut chunk in her name. She's
German. She's German. German black. Oh yeah.
She got a little swastika over her. I've never
seen one black sister bitch in, uh... I mean,
did you have to pee? I mean... Everywhere I went.
It's nothing but white bitches. It's all white
bitches everywhere I went. Yeah, but that was,
what, 30 years ago? 40 years ago? Yeah, but no.
No, it was 20 years ago. But it was all the big
major cities, you'd think. But no, man. Nothing
but whites. It was weird. Larry, this is 30 years
ago. 20 years ago. Okay, you're high on mushrooms.
Why are you even talking about that? I'm just
saying, it was weird. Because that's how you
want it to be, right? No, I didn't say that.
That's what you want, right? No. You just want
an all -white society. No, I didn't say that.
I mean, Larry. I didn't say that. I mean, your
eyes say all of it. I can tell by your expression.
Expression shall I say? That's right. So what's
wrong with that? No, it was fucking not bad.
It was pretty nice The problem is is race becomes
over religion religion becomes over race. All
right, they rest that's the new John lemon because
I mean listen There's nothing better than a person
complaining how persecuted they are by the white
man And then they're married to a white man and
that faggot just got arrested. All right, you
said it I did it He did. Larry FBI contacts over
here. They said that what he did was not journalism
when he went in that church and shit and got
in those people's faces. Oh, well, you know what?
Listen, man. And he's like, I'm protected under
journalism, blah, blah, blah. And they're like,
no, motherfucker, this was attacking the... Create
a problem. make the people beg the government
for a solution. It's our new Patriot Act right
now. This is our new Patriot Act right now. And
I'll say that. I don't know if anybody said that,
but I'll say that. Doing these illegals and fucking
watching upon them and marking where they go
and coordination, collaboration, triangulation
and all this bullshit. Guess who's that working
against? The American people. We are mishmash
into illegals. And they'll turn it on us in four
seconds, right? As they always do. Well, just
like they did with the, you know... so -called
fucking 9 -eleven terrorists in the in the Airports
man all of a sudden when we would go on tour
and shit it became this fucking thing where all
of a sudden you get caught with a lighter and
they're ready to Handcuffs and shit. No apples
and fucking orange. No, but that was all fake
shit to turn against the people and they Like
it was you're a real son of a bitch. You're just
gonna side rail all that just to tell me about
a fucking lighter Well, no, I'm just saying,
they fucking turned it on the people, asshole.
Just like you're fucking saying. They're gonna
turn it on us. They already did. They turned
it on you right away. Look what they did to the
blacks. Look what they did to Spaulding. Spaulding
asked for a new laptop for Christmas. Did he
get one? No. You got nothing, again. Well, they
say they're like monkeys. Remember that when
they did the monkey thing with the laptop? And
they said, yeah, they don't know how to work
the laptops or something. No, they don't have
IDs, which is the best. Who needs an ID? And
then they did the monkey thing on the internet.
What was the joke? I forgot it. Saying that.
What's that? You know, what was the joke? I forgot.
I don't know what the fuck you're talking about.
The fucking monkey thing, dude. The monkey thing?
That is the most vague thing I've ever heard.
The monkey thing. With the laptops. With the
laptops. Yeah, because Kathy Hochel said that
they couldn't fucking access shit with the laptops
and they couldn't use computers. Oh, right, right,
right, right. Kathy Hochel. Oh my god. I fucking
forgot, motherfucker. How am I supposed to remember
all this shit? Can't be hopeful said I don't
know I know but that's what I'm here for you
monkey and then you diminish my character like
I'm a low mob boss and some see budget Listen,
I'm not sucking toes and sniffing farts. All
right, I'm coming up to the boss position And
let me get one of them kiddo, but no So Kathy
Hokel's another fucking my favorite is I would
like to write in Whitmer. Yeah, I would love
to fucking Get a hold of her, one night. Oh man,
the views that Larry just had, out of Larry and
Edel's show. She's hot. I'd like to fucking do
Whitmer. I think she's hot. I would like to do
her. Okay, I mean, can you be any more creepier
about a lady you've never met and seen pictures
of? Well no, I can't because, why would I? You
gotta get up close. Up close and personal. I'm
going to stop at the knife store first. No. The
only stabbing I want to do is with my dick. This
knife just has a camera. It's going to record.
Technically, I'm not threatening you with a knife,
just a camera. I would have a fucking... Go for
strapped on my fucking helmet stop for a second
Larry has two hitters Fucking nice. I got it.
I got it. I got this one in the box red hot Larry
My name is Larry and I'm autistic see that red
hot red hot Larry peppers And it's got us it's
got two fucking ceramic cheers Ceramic fucking
there's a fag things Which is cool. We should
draw a pentagram on the ground and pray to Alistair
Crowley. No, man. I'm not doing that. That's
just an idea. Speaking of Alistair Crowley though.
What about him, brother? Do you know that Barbara
Bush is his son? Alright, let's unpack this for
a second. Do I know that Barbara Bush is Alistair
Crowley's son? Barbara Bush, the old fucking
lady that was really, like, looked like a man.
The one that's totally a man, you know, the old
lady that was married to the president and you
think, why is this guy married to this old fucking
grandma? And then you look close and you think,
man, that's an old man. That nigga's a man. Yeah,
and then you look closer and you're like, shit,
that motherfucker's Alistair Crowley's son. That's
what I think Barbara Bush is out. They also know
Anton LeVay now just Satan her His daughter did
you ever see his daughter the really hot? I'm
going to let you know the slutty looking hot
one that looks like Taylor Swift slutty version
of Taylor Swift like get your juices going doesn't
it? But here's the thing man. It makes you think
well where did Taylor Swift fucking come from?
makes you chink about what if there was an Asian
Taylor Swift. But here's the thing. Makes you
chink. I think already that the Taylor Swift...
And I'm blowing my a material over here. Very
honorable. Very honorable. But, you know, Taylor
Swift is fucking probably Anton LaVey's daughter's
clone or some shit. Do you really believe that,
though? Hell yeah, I do. I mean, we talked about
that. I believe all that crazy fucking shit.
Well, if you can't... Listen, here's the fucking
deal, though. If you can't just pick and choose
what you believe, do you believe it all or do
you believe not all? Exactly. That's why I believe
it all. And I'm in the, uh... No, I don't believe
all. Well, no, I believe all the fucking, uh,
horror stories. I believe... Come on, it's like
prostitution? Well, here's the thing. No. It
really looks like you and I are playing mahjong
down here. It looks like... Listen, I'm going
to tell you right now, we are getting compromised
by the CCP in the next 30 minutes. There he can
handle it all. All right Larry, yes sir, keep
going. I forgot what I was talking about, man.
Imagine that. We're talking about the moon. We're
talking about Hitler. You wanna talk about, um...
Okay, let's talk about Hitler. No, that's not
at all. Here's the thing about Hitler. I mean,
he sounded like your best friend. He was a bad
guy. He killed a lot of people. Blah, blah, blah.
But here's the thing. People walk around with
t -shirts with Che Guevara. Fucking... Mike Tyson's
got a tattoo of mile Fucking you can wear is
that dude the motherfuckers? How about what about
the bullshit man? So you can you know you could
you could wear a t -shirt with with whoever you
want on there or or whatever raging dictator,
murderer, killer. But for some reason, Hitler,
who didn't even get close to these other guys
in numbers of kills, like Sam Tripoli, he's like
the worst fucking person. Like Sam Tripoli says,
Hitler's on the bench waiting to come into the
game while these other. Yeah, these other. Absolutely.
We call it these other mass pros. Fauci, Fauci
fucking up there, baby. Come on, US government.
And they got Fauci candles in the fucking Walgreens
or whatever. It's CVS with like the guy in the
Hispanic section, the little fucking religious
candles. They had religious fucking Fauci candles.
Come on, you're fucking kidding me. I'm not kidding
you, man. You should have bought all of them.
They're probably worth the shit done now. Nah,
I can't stand that cocksucker. Save your Fauci.
What are you going to do? What a fucking piece
of shit that guy is. First of all, we all know
he started with the fucking Dallas Buyers Club
with AZT and AIDS. This guy killed for nooks.
Yeah. On a mass scale and then hid and then all
of a sudden came back in his fucking his coup
d 'etat. His Magnus Opus, shall I say, was covid.
That was the culmination of multitudes of years
of experience, just. Tied into a little man,
forced by the government to fucking... Yeah,
okay, whatever. And he was the highest paid little
fucking drag off out there. It's all back to
Fort... It's all back to Fort Deertrick and they
fucking... Where they brought Lyme disease. All
that bullshit that the government thought all
this was... Was that Lyme, Pennsylvania? How
come the Blacks don't get Lyme disease? Because
they don't go hunting. They don't get near deers.
Well they don't want to be by trees. I don't
know, I just came up with that on the fly. I
like that. I like how you like that. That's really
good. You know Rosa Parks had a car? Yeah. Why
the fuck was that bitch taking the bus? Because
she was a photo op and a Psy op, just like the
person before her. And she had a really nice
car too. There was a Rosa Parks before her. And
she got, uh, nailed by her... She got impregnated
by her handler, shall we say. And... this, uh,
this, uh, Alex Purdy guy? Pretty? Dude, that
guy couldn't be... If you ask me to draw fucking
Jew, that's who you would... Oh, yeah. Jew Junior.
Super Jew Junior. He was waiting to grow into
that fucking nose, man. Another fucking Psyhop
and nothing happened. So we just now they're
just Throwing people out to the fodder. They're
letting them get killed. Oh, maybe this white
broad Renee Good Yeah, who is a fucking slut?
Oh, she's going to here. I don't know if she
was a slut or not, but she's going to hell no
matter what she was at night Doesn't matter.
She's right. Here's your ticket. Jesus just punched
it with All right, there you go. Don't use your
shit. And then you got this fucking... I like
that. Jesus just wants you to take the fucking
9mm. You're going to hell, bitch. Fucking eat
some pussy down there. I fucking don't wish hell
on anybody. I didn't stop your rant. I don't
wish hell on her though, but again. Dude, Jesus
punched in your ticket. Jesus did punch that
ticket with a nine millimeter. He was pretty
serious about shit. Dude, listen, if you believe
in anything, you're the lord and savior of Jesus
Christ, right? Yeah, absolutely. But, second
of all, don't drive at a guy who's got a gun.
Right? Yeah. Even if Jesus is sitting next to
you in the car, Jesus told me to do it. Jesus
told me to do it. I would be Jesus and I'm driving.
Run that mother. I'm sick of these guys. We got
six kids in the car. Okay. Fuck those cops. Jesus
doesn't need a rifle as a thing. He just fucking...
How do you know that? He can fucking do it with
his mind. Yeah, because you've been watching
too many movies, dude. Jesus can do it with his
mind. It's the most fucking mushroom thing I've
ever heard. Jesus can do it with his mind. Yeah.
Write that down, one of us, because I can barely
read right now. the episode. No, seriously, he
can though. He can walk on water, he can part
the seas, he can do all kinds of shit. Do you
think he touch kids? No. I think you're gonna
go to hell just for asking me. But that's what
you would like to think, but now I'm asking real
questions. No, you just didn't touch kids, man.
How do you know? Because you didn't. I mean,
if this guy gets third water and the wine...
There would be some kind of record of that. He's
like, hey man, he meets like a 19 year old and
he's like, I bet you were hot when you were 14
and he turns 14. Oh man. That's why you're going
home. Come on, bro. That's what I'm talking about.
I just answer questions everybody wants to know.
I'm a journalist. Is that what you'd do? You'd
see a 19 -year -old and fucking say, I bet you
were pretty hot when you were 14. No, not at
all. I'd just say in the fictitious world of
Jesus being the man, if he can turn water into
wine, he can walk on water, and he can be like,
hey, I bet you were hotter when you were younger.
He just throws that one in there really quick.
He tries to catch them off guard. He said don't
write Wait a minute Repeat that one Jesus Actually,
you talk about Muhammad, but that's enough a
write it down, huh? He was down the clown Muhammad
was down the clown. Not Muhammad probably, you
know, not the Gandhi one How about the Dalai
Lama getting money from the CIA? Dalai Lama probably
touch kids, too You think there's pictures of
them tongue -kissing one? Oh, is there? Yeah!
This motherfucker just tongue -kissed a kid in
front of like 50 ,000 people. It was a religious
experience No, he's gonna go jerk off to the
head later. That's all it was. It was for a spank
bank. I mean, think about that. There's like
these notorious pedos in this world. Wasn't the
Dalai Lama really was tongue -kissing a child?
Yeah, I could draw a picture of that. Oh man,
that fucking asshole. You think that guy was
great? We talked about how the CIA - I never
thought he was great. We talked about how the
CIA was giving him - I didn't think he was doing
that. That ain't cool. Tongue -kissing kids?
Eh, we don't fuck it. We frown about that shit
around here. That's right, though. Laura, our
savior Jesus Christ, will take two bullets and
put it right to your throat, pedophiles. We all
deserve to die, right, Larry? Mm -hmm. Well...
Well, wait a minute! Who's gonna do the shooting
when you say Jesus Christ is gonna put the bullets?
That's the part I'm... Through you? Man, I'm
high. Is he gonna do it through you? Huh? He's
gonna do it through you? Yes, and my vessel,
my body's a vessel. For Jesus. Yes, for Jesus.
So when I go to court, I can say, now you're
my backup and the good Lord. The world knows,
and so does... We have to bring Spaulding up
as a witness, as a character witness. Uncle Needles.
If he's a good guy or not Yeah, they won't listen
to a kid who won't in court, huh? I'm criminal
court. What do you mean? You have once you're
too much long -order more fun They don't let
they don't let kids testify in court. My wife
was a fucking public defender. No Even in divorce
court the kids The kids' testimony is always
iffy. They're not redacted, but they're not.
But it's not taken with the same weight. Well,
they don't have to come up on the stand is what
you're saying. No, but even if they do, they're
still not taking on the same weight, you know,
because they're kids and the kids' emotions can
get in the way. And also. An outside influence
with a kid could fucking make the kid's memory,
you know, create false memories for him and shit.
They could do that. Yeah, they're children. It's
called MKUltra, Larry. Have you ever heard of
it? Yeah. Well, that's why they don't fucking
take a kid seriously in court. Because they know
that anybody can manipulate a kid. They can fucking
do whatever they want to a child's mind. These
child priests, they use like your like your childish
mind. My childish mind. Yeah. How should I entail
my childish mind? I don't know, how? I just like
to entice it with - What do kids like? Coming
from a man who can't be about fucking 500 yards
from the playground, you tell me what it's like,
Larry. Unlike you, I can ride my bike next to
a school. I can ride my bike next to a school.
Yeah, very quickly though, because you're not
supposed to be there. I have to be in 10th gear.
He only gets a couple peaks. 10th gear peaks.
I'm not supposed to slow down under 13 miles
an hour. Just pretty fast on the bike. Yeah,
but I mean you're wanted by the cops. Actually,
you know, you shouldn't be by a schoolyard. Fuck
you. You're the one. I love how when they have,
you know, they have the thing up, you know, the
digital thing that reads when you come by. Yeah.
So you gotta slow down in front of a schoolyard.
Yeah. You're just two miles an hour just cruising.
Hey, why are you going so slow? Hey, you need
better form on you throw. Let me teach you Dude
speed up on the cops Mr. You should be on the
other side of the fence. Mm -hmm How did you
get in here? I don't even know. It's so funny.
I don't even know what you're saying. I know.
The hell. It's just me being stupid and fucking
retarded. So, Spalding's mom, I don't know. Oh,
man. We said in the last episode how she was
going to Africa on the Carnival Cruise. She kinda
got a beer with us, man. We're on mushrooms.
But tonight we found out that she actually had
to get, uh... Helicopter lifted off of the Chinook
off of the Off of the ship for fighting She was
fighting at the buffet They ran out of crab legs
She beat the shit out of one of the workers and
how the fuck you run out of crab legs in the
middle of the sea What the fuck? Yeah, she didn't
play though The guy who's running the ma 'am.
We don't catch crabs. I don't give a fuck. This
is here whitey, but listen, I brought my 19 sisters
with me But sir And So, you know nobody bought
I'm she got fucking removed from the ship for
causing such a ruckus They couldn't calm the
bitch down cuz yeah fictitious babies mama's
talking about Spalding's mother. We have nothing
else to talk about What the fuck man, okay, so
then let's see Hmm. All right. Talked about people
getting shot with ice. Yeah. Talked about NASA.
Here's my thing with the ice thing. Like they
should do like the old days in Chicago. With
the DNC with Richard Daly. Yeah, I know. Just
said that like a national convention. Shoot at
will. But it wasn't shoot at will. They went
and cracked skulls. They didn't kill anybody.
But. They said when there was, uh, first of all,
excuse me, those in Grant Park, which is a, I
mean, if you, if you're not from Chicago, it's
a huge fucking part. It's right in the middle
of downtown. The cops can't control them and
just beat the shit out of them. It's come on.
It's all fucking faking gay layer. Pretty much
your fence. But I'm going to tell you right now,
there's nothing better than cracking hippie skulls.
Yeah, that has got to be the ultimate drug rush.
We'll never experience it. Well, My uncle was
uh He was in the National Guard or some bullshit
at the time Does he even know the origin of the
story? But okay, that's a good way to start and
he said it was terrible. He hated it What was
terrible? The fucking 69 Democratic Convention
Said it was fucking horrible. I mean you just
you know, I mean you are the ultimate A lot of
these people are just fucking on reserves. They
don't want to be, they don't do it. And then
all of a sudden they get called in. And now you
got to snap to and fucking I you know, it's not
your bad. No, you know what I mean the fucking
corruption was so Yeah, but he wasn't getting
any of the good corruption money. He was just
Yeah, it's funny. That's let me tell you that's
worked up. He said it was terrible Spitting in
his face and shit, huh shine spitting in your
face. Yeah, okay I mean, you couldn't give me
a billion dollars after that. Yeah. And so, you
know, it makes these guys want to crack stars.
Do you want to talk about reparations? Black
guys spit in my face. There's his reparations.
So and basically they're out there with I don't
even think these guys had guns or anything It
was just beat people with these fucking nightsticks.
You know what I mean? Well, that's fucking dangerous
I mean, first of all, these dumb hippies out
there with their stupid fucking wooden signs
and they're all on drugs and then all of a sudden
the fucking the meat police come out and they
just start brandishing their sticks and you're
like What do you want to do? Daily's are a thief.
Crap. You know what I mean? It's all the fucking
same bullshit, dude. Listen, it's the same fucking
turd. But same with these guys now. It's the
same turd, different shitter, when you look at
it in the government. And I'm gonna patent that.
That's a good one. Doesn't even make sense, but
you could patent that. No, it's the same turd
they give you, but a different guy shitting it.
So it's like Trump is doing the fucking, giving
us the same turd. heard the fucking is Biden
did this and man they fucking create a problem
like we said this could be another shit sandwich
have a bite this guy's gonna fucking die that
could be the motto his side hurts cuz he's laughing
so hard Here's another shit sandwich, have a
bite. My diabetes. Got nine beers in front of
me. This is stupid now. It really is. You're
fucking stupid. This is genius. You're a fucking
retard. Get the fuck out of here. Everything
I say is fucking genius. Fuck you ass clown.
Dude, come on. Think about it. Okay. Think about
how retarded you are. No. Yeah. Fucking brilliant.
Yeah. You okay. Listen, the only thing you Sigmund
Freud and fucking Einstein having to review,
they're both kid touchers. You got a PhD in whatever.
Man, we fizzle out quick. Nah, it's you fizzling
out. I got a million of them. Well, keep going
then, sucker. Shit, man. I mean, this is where
I got a deal. It's fucking retard. So then do
we pretend that everything is good right now?
Satanists fucking pedophiles. How about the thing
and not in the fucking? capital building in Minnesota
Dedicated this You know what listen man Here's
the deal That's some wild shit. Every church
wants to be a church, and then after they become
a church, then they can fuck with kids. Especially
the Satanists, because they're not even hiding
it. Or do weird sex stuff. Because they're part
of the... Between them, you know what I mean?
Sex magic and shit, you know? No, I mean, uh,
sex... Isn't that... Doesn't that sound like
fun? Not really. Sounds bad for the recipient.
It sounds terrible for the recipient. If I'm
getting all gacked out and I'm just hanging out
with this chicken, she's like, let's draw a pentagram
and have sex. I'm like stupid. Hell no, bitch.
It sounds like a lot of work, and I don't know
where we're going to get goat blood at this time
of night. All right? Exactly. Just give me your
butthole, and let's have fun. Because you're
a sodomite. Well, yeah, because that's where
the fucking... Needle's a sodomizer. I should
make a t -shirt out of this. Needles and satellite.
I mean, I don't even know what the picture would
be. What would the picture be? And the shirt.
Before I knew any better, I was a sodomite too,
but here's the thing, once I learned... You stopped
getting pussy and ass. No, but once I learned
what the fuck was going on with the Lord, I didn't
want to fucking do sodomy no more like you, you
weirdo. Yeah, but just on yourself, not to anybody
else. Yeah, how the hell are you gonna do sodomy
on yourself? Man, I love you so much. You're
gonna kill me right now. Neal's a sodomizer.
I'm sorry for her. I'm not gonna do sodomy on
myself. It's the greatest thing you ever said.
An ass dildo, dumbass. Aw. Aw, man. Fuck it,
my little retarded nerd. I Don't go for artificial
fucking shit What do you mean what am I talking
about artificial fucking All right, let's talk
about the government. Okay. How they sodomize
us. Tulsi Gabbard. Yay or nay? Wait, what? Tulsi
Gabbard. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Tulsi Gabbard,
yeah. Wasn't she like a stripper? I'd fucking
do her in a second. Huh? I'd do Tulsi in a second.
You should apply to be her fucking pro. Probably
take me a second. To what? It's a nut. You'd
just smile at her and you'd be like... You knew
what else? Jackson Pollock on your jeans. Yeah,
it'll be like a Jackson Pollock painting. Fucking,
how about, uh, uh, Bobert? That slutty one that
was jacking off the guy in the movie theater.
Bitch, you can't be jerking dudes off. And she's
like, fuck you, I'm a senator. I can do whatever
I want. Congresswoman. You can jerk any dude.
I think she's great. What do you mean? I love
her. She was like, yeah, man, I can just jerk
anybody I want. You can do whatever I want. Yeah,
man, I'm gonna jerk this dude off. So what if
we're in a public place? I mean, that fucking
video was better than 9 -11 days. It was more
real. Well, no, but it was, as I'm saying, it
wasn't real. No, you don't think so? No. So they
just, what, made fake videos of Bobert fucking
jerking someone off? Yeah. I mean, you said it,
I didn't. You think that's real? Oh, man. I don't
know. Exactly. I like to think so. It's just
funny. Let's make this fucking video. She's cute.
She's definitely cute. Dude, she's a fucking
weirdo. What do you mean, man? I would do her.
What do you mean, she's a weirdo? That bitch,
I mean, she's got Will Chamberlain numbers. What?
You don't even know who that is, do you? He's
a fucking, some kind of sports guy. I love you
Larry, so much. He's some kind of sports guy.
He claimed that he would have sex with like 100
,000 women or something like that. He was a big
ass shine too. Good for him. Good for Wilt. Wilt
the stilt thing. He's just a weird ass lanky
fucking hybrid nigga. So, you know, I don't know,
put me in her numbers I guess. Whose? Kristen
Boebert or whatever her name is. Kristen Boebert?
Christine Boebert. What's her name? Lauren Boebert.
Lauren Boebert. Jesus, man. I don't know. How
fucked up are you, bro? Give me your number.
You just start messaging Christine Boebert. I
found her in the phone book. Let me see your
underwear. See, not Larry's not like that. Who
else, man? Who else what? What other politicians?
No, the one I really like the most is Anna Paulina
Luna talking about a siap. That bitch sounds
like some sort of moon cycle. Oh, dude. She's
hot. She is like a moon cycle. First of all,
she shouldn't be... She was... She shouldn't
even be in this country with that name. Nah,
she shouldn't. She's fucking good -looking and
she is a... She was a swimsuit model. Good. Ship
her back to Mexico. No, man, keep her here. She's
fucking hotter than shit. She's beautiful. You
don't know who she is. Man, she is one of the
hottest fucking... Why would you compare ladies?
She's hotter than shit. She's hot as fuck. Because
this is a fucking turd pile. I really compare,
she's hotter than shit. She's hot as fuck. It's
horrible. It's the worst comparison ever. And
I'm finally gonna say it out loud. She's hotter
than shit. She's hot as fuck. How about that?
She's hot as fuck, man. She's hot. Nice fucking
body. Beautiful. She's really pretty. She's a
succubus. Beautiful face. Long fucking hair.
She works for the cartel. She fucking works for
probably the CIA. Oh yeah. Forget the cartel.
The cartel works for her. Where do you think
the cartel fucking started from? Word. Right?
And then you figure out, oh my god, they're getting
trained from the massage. But you know, she is
the complete package Psy -Op. Fucking... Yeah,
I mean, she's a cutie patootie, but that's alright
though. But that's why you're gonna get fucking...
Honey Pied! Yeah! It all boils. Look at that.
Look, I love how you keep on laughing like a
dumb retard. Well, here's the thing. I'm just
like, oh, she's got a vagina and boobies, and
she wants me to look at them. And you're like,
hee -hee -hee -hee. Like a little Japanese broad.
Like you want to get honey -potted. Huh? Like
you can't. Like you're impervious. To what? Getting
honey -potted. By who? You're just a stupid,
well, who's going to honey -pot me? Well, I don't
know. Asians? They want our technology. They
want our masters for the show. Well, I don't
have any technology for the Asians. Mostly all
I come in contact with... Mostly all I come in
contact with are fucking bartenders and fucking...
The Chinese would kidnap you and you're like,
oh man, I love it in Hong Kong. They're like,
you're in Woodfield, motherfucker. You're at
P .F. Chang's, motherfucker. You have chains
right now. What do you want? Colonel Chow's chicken
or whatever? General Chow. Man, you're returning
something. No, I said all I'd come in contact
with would honey pot me. It would be like the
Mexican waitresses or the fucking bartender at
the places I go to. And you know, and I mean,
you know, and I'll bring the Eagles. No, are
you sure? Yeah, I'm damn sure that or not be
Larry There's no one here at my house except
me and my wife. No, but you know where they're
at when you go out. Oh, yeah The guilt of admission
everywhere I go could be anywhere I hang out
could be an illegal waitress That's a could be
a nice rate in any minute everywhere. I fucking
go, but here's the thing Who cares? It's kind
of hot to watch. Yeah get arrested getting their
handcuffs behind them and shit Me trying to explain
that I'm an American and stuff. It's all excited.
I'm their lawyer No, I need to retain her possessions
Any waitresses that have any coke in your purse
you better give it to me right now They're just
confiscating drugs You definitely are a CIA.
You don't want them to get it. Oh, you're getting
more Yeah, I just tell them you get more trouble
if you get caught with this you're better off
giving it to me right now I'll go do it in the
bathroom So you're saying Chad follow. I'll keep
you safe I'll do your blow. I'll hide your secret.
I'll do your blow so I can keep you safe. Your
secret is safe between me. Me and my fucking
self and yourself. And Spalding. And Spalding.
I gotta tell him everything. He's my son He knows
everything He's all seen. He can't testify in
court though. I mean he was caught in an Asian
ladies garage sale Well, I mean if you get it's
like a fucking mogwai Spalding you know what
else so that's better. We think that's better
than adopting a kitten Though I saved him you
got him at our friends garage sale mm -hmm that
is a known to play my John a real friend of the
dragon lady Man -butterfly type. She's a real
dragon lady, so to speak. Ah, you want my baby.
I saw you baby. I saw you, baby, for $100. Oh,
come on, man. I said, hell no, $100, are you
fucking crazy? A peek in the truck. And then,
uh... Mm -hmm. Yeah. Then, yeah, what? I fucking
chewed her down, and I got twatling for, like,
20 bucks. That is so anti -Semitic. What you
just said right there. We do not believe in that
Nullarian ego. Sometimes it just comes out with
this old -school racist. We do not believe in
that talk. I talked her down in price. And how
much did you her down? Like 80 bucks. And then
she sent ninjas after her. Her kids look like
ninjas. Yeah. And then? I don't know. I don't
want to talk shit about Sue's daughter. How cute
she is and everything. Because Jay might watch
this. I don't want to say that Sue's daughter
is fucking hot and all that. Jesus, you just
did, dude. You're so retarded. I mean, you can't
fucking help yourself. You're the stupidest person
I know. And I love you more than... And I'm just
joking about it. You're just so stupid, you are.
I know what you're doing. I know you know what
you're doing. Fucking retarded man over here.
I think she's... Calm down hot rod go spin your
wheels back there. She's at least like 19 or
20 or something. So It's not some weird shit.
So what do you think about green? About moving
there I mean, do you really think Greenland is
a sustainable place for the Larian needles? Well,
depends, man. Are they giving away free shit
there? Like a house or something for U .S. citizens?
I mean, would they have to? No. I think you could
just go hang out in some whale pub bar and fucking...
Here's the thing, though, man. You better get
a shelter going that's pretty sturdy pretty quick
because... This isn't the Tundra! Well, here's
the thing. We're not Tundra, my man. We have
polar bears and shit. This isn't the Arctic.
Yeah, it is. They got wild animals and shit.
Yeah, you They also have Polar Bears. They would
be hilarious if they used the Polar Bears. All
of a sudden everybody has some form of super
AIDS. And they'll kill you. Polar Bears are brutal,
man. You're my favorite animal. Polar Bears.
Yeah, until they're fucking dripping your heart.
When I was a little kid, we fucking went to the
Brookfield Zoo. Polar Bears are great because
they had the largest paws to shred you with.
Well, no, the motherfucker was playing with the
keg of beer. Yeah, they're awesome. I love the
Polar Bears, too. Thanks for just ruining my
story, Larry. Well, no. Just like my childhood,
just ruining it. I ruined your childhood, didn't
I? No, I said... Just like Wojtek. The bear he
was great. He liked playing in the water, too
And with kegs and whatever is the most ultimate
Polak fucking joke ever And it is great. That's
infantry man a bear and it is great that They
would throw in the barrel for the bearer to play
with, just like they did for Wojtek. Because
back then it's all they had, but I wonder if
that's why they threw it to the bearer still,
like at Brookfield Zoo and shit like that. As
a nod to the cap to Wojtek. Nah, I just think
some motherfucker was like, put a keg in there
for them bitches to play with. I mean, really,
did you just go off on a tangent about I wasn't
even paying attention to you? Obviously. Yeah,
because you were just talking about how Voightek
tipped a hat or something? Exactly. When I repeat
this shit, you know I'm retarded. That's not
what I said. No, you just realized I'm retarded.
Voightek didn't tip a hat. Whatever. He just
retarded. That's what it boils down to. I can't
control that. Voightag is a bear, man. Yeah,
I know, nigga. I know the bear is. Yeah, but
he didn't tip a hat. Well, why am I not? I said
the zookeeper snare giving a tip of the hat to
Voightag by throwing a barrel. Well, did he have
a hat on and he tipped him back? Do you know
that? No, I don't know that. Exactly, so fuck
you. I'm just making it up. You're really just
trying... I'm just saying what if they're gonna
fight in about four seconds. No, man. Seriously.
What if they did that for Voightek? They tipped
the hat to him? Yeah, they came and tipped the
hat. What about if Voightek tipped the pen? That's
really funny. Voightek was dead already. So where
were they tipping their hat to? His spirit avoid
tech dude, you're so retarded Who the fuck is
doing this? Where are they zookeepers everywhere?
Everywhere where in the world? Everyone knows
about me. They fucking tip their heads to void
time. Yeah in unison I don't know if they're
slow down unison You just as every time every
time they throw a barrel into the Bears water
into the water is the tip of the hat. This is
when a liar gets caught lying This is when a
dummy this I'm saying Throw in the barrel into
the water is the tip of the hat You get it, because
Wojtek liked the barrels. So by throwing the
bear a barrel, it's a tip of the hat to Wojtek,
and your bear likes it. You can't even say that
with a straight face without crying. You're such
a liar. How could you lie in front of your best
friend like that? No, man. Oh, I'm just crying.
I'm just wiping my tears away. I can't even breathe.
I'm just going to sit here and wipe my tears
and turn my back to my friend. No, seriously.
Yeah, what seriously what the tech can't take
you serious at all Every word that comes out
of your mouth is a fucking lie Trust you for
shit you work your front of the massage Yeah,
I could tell I should take a picture cuz your
nose is like two inches outside growing It really
is. With every contribution, it keeps it going.
With every contribution to the Friends of Zion.
Holy fuck, look at that schnaz, dude. Fuck, okay,
ladies and gentlemen, I hate to announce this
to you, we've been compromised. What an idea.
Thankfully, Fat Girl is not here, but he probably
has two slices in his mouth and two bunnies on
his lap. I saw this really great video. I should
send it to Kiki. It was the fucking bunny that
was friends with the kitty and Bunny that was
friends with the kitties All right pop hop you
can't discern What the fuck is it? Yeah, I said
to Mary's it's fucking for real. Yeah, I love
I asked my wife So I go through a two -boomer
system. Hey, is this AI? No, honey. Hey, I'm
Gen X, nigga. What the heck? I'm Gen X. And?
What was your summation of it? It wasn't a boomer
system. It was a Gen X fucking dessert. What
was your summation of the video then? It was
really cool. I almost sent it to Kiki because
I know he likes monies. We almost sent it to
him. Yeah, I didn't. But you forgot. Well, no,
we were on Echo Wafers. We were on Mary's phone,
and I don't think his number is in her phone.
So it would have been sent to my phone and then
sent to him. So that's why it didn't get done.
You got a three party system to send text messages.
Yeah, I wasn't going to go through all that shit.
I mean, give me a break. Sit down at the mainframe.
Flip a big fucking switch. Have a good time.
Child for child for child for child for child
for child for child for child for child for child
for child for child And that's it man, no more
computer story Everything was behind the firewall
I don't like the shit from the bottom of the
hammock up to the top. Rather run through the
top of the hammock. You know that about John
McAfee, right? Mm -hmm. Boy, I like the little
turd play. Where do you hear all this shit from?
Why are you so interested in turd play all the
time? It's disgusting. Is that what you're looking
up, though, on your computer? No. Your phone
and shit? P -stuff, yeah, but in no terms. If
you want an answer, kids gonna give it to you.
And sometimes you can't handle the truth. Like
a fake movie, baby. But what do you want to believe?
Do you want to believe everything is real? Well,
I saw movies of Cap McAfee and the fucking...
Who? McAfee, McAfee, whatever the fuck. John
McAfee. Okay. I'm calling McAfee. Nice tearaway
pants. You're like fucking Scottie Pippen from
The Bold. Tearaway? What do you mean? Those are
like fucking joggers. No, man. These are my lined
pants. They're lined. Dude, these things are
fucking great. Super warm. Nothing. Sugar baby
it up. All right getting back to who we're talking
about. Mm -hmm Son of a biscuit. Well, you know
it all comes down to fucking you're being watched
If there was no more of a truthful statement
said on mushrooms, right there. You're under
surveillance right now, actually. We're all under
surveillance, and as we post this to the web,
we're letting them take our shit. We're just
giving it to them. Yeah, I know. We're getting
fucking retards, man. Maybe we shouldn't do this.
Four people watching. Two of them are bots and
the other one's a fucking FBI agent. Oh, that'd
be hilarious. Oh, what do we got, Chad and fucking
one of your friends and fucking... Hey, at least
they're loyal, nigga. That's good. That's all
right, though. I saw your name on the Epstein
files and everybody abandoned you. Well, you
know. Larry Jones. You can't win them all. No.
You do like a Bon Jovi cover band. I can't help
but imagine that if you just did like a cover
band on Epstein's Island and now your name's
on there. And all of a sudden you're playing
at some party with your band. Yeah. And you're
on the flight log. And you're just playing fucking
80s music. Well, they touch kids in the background.
No, your name is Tiredness for Life. Yeah. That's
probably not cool, right? No. They'll do whatever
they want to you. Well, here's the thing. Whatever
band would go play at Epstein Island had to know
what's going on. How do you know that? I don't
know. Maybe they would get on a jet and bring
your instruments. Like we're gonna go play a
gig and the next thing you know, you're on Little
St. James. You're like, oh, I can see Richard
Branson's island over there. Is he the guy who's
got Virgin written on his plane? Yeah, never
mind him. Never mind the guy who's got Virgin
written on his plane. That guy's not a threat
to nobody. He's just like... Virgin! Virgin!
Virgin! Not even S! This is virgin! It's like...
Anything. Anything virgin. What can you assimilate
anything to under virgin? Well you saw the virgin
record. The virgin records label. Have you ever
seen the logo on the record label? Virgin records?
Yeah, but I mean... He's got Necker Island. Necker
Island, which was in accordance... You know,
a couple hundred miles maybe from Epstein's Island
that we talked about. That far? I don't know
what nautical miles are, nigga. I ain't fuckin'
seen one, nigga. I got my sea legs on me. I think
they're more than a regular mile. I want to say
Nautical... Nautical miles are longer than a
fucking wagon. Captain Salty the Faggot. Yeah,
that's hilarious. Oh, you burned me. No, that
makes me laugh. Captain Salty the Faggot. He
calls me a retard. You can keep talking. Yeah,
and so, you know, nautical miles are further.
That's the fucking question. What am I gonna
keep talking about? We do a podcast. This is
your first time doing this. What am I gonna talk
about? There's nine billion things to talk about.
They put you on the spot and then you get mad
at your co -host. What am I gonna talk about?
What I meant to say is how much more do you want
me to expound on nautical fucking miles? How
much more can I talk about? How much more can
I give to this world? Oh my god, my louche. I'm
gonna put it all over your face. What is the
whatever weirdo? All I'm saying is you can only
talk about nautical miles so much when you don't
know anything about them. Yeah, exactly. You're
like John Wayne Gacy over here. How so? How am
I John Wayne Gacy? How many bodies is he dumping
in nautical miles? You're the fucking John Wayne
Gacy. I think I wish I was man. I'm a fucker
head. I think that's why He had pride and also
talk about this take pride in what he did, huh?
He took pride in what he did. Yeah. Oh my god
Pogo Polish on the coast do the motherfucker
met Nancy Carter's wife How What do you mean?
There's pictures of them shaking... Just by being
head Polak, but I mean, but what... The head
Polak in charge, while he was killed and doing
his thing that, you know, we... Listen, man.
Yeah, oh wait, ugly guy, oh yeah, death rogue
and executed. What? On May 10th, 1994 or something.
What the fuck did you just say? I said, Casey
got killed. So he said, do I remember a guy that...
Gacy got executed by the state. Oh, my bad. Yeah,
yeah, yeah. I don't know, man. I don't know when
he died. Yeah, it was May 10th, 1994. Nigger
-ass -fucking -unibomber shit over there. It's
like a unibomber. The sugar baby bomber. Oh,
yeah. Yeah. Man, now I got to deal with this
haunted ass for the next four hours. I should
go listen to Fiddler on the ground. I'm fucking
stoned. I gotta fucking piss, man. Where's the
timer we at? Shit, man. Good luck seeing. Shit,
I thought we were at 24 minutes, but it's an
hour and 24 minutes. It's fine, shut it off.
Oh, okay. All right, let me, let me. Man, let
me play. You're so retarded around me. Let me
play the outro. Literally, I asked you to shut
it up. I'm gonna play the music part now. Oh,
we got two good ones tonight. I might do a third.
Thank you for tuning in. Mm -hmm.