time to get ready for Larry and Needles show.
I'm prepared.
Larry and Needles
Oh there's more?
Yeah.
Larry and Needles show
Alright thanks for tuning into the Larry and Needles show.
I'm Larry.
I'm Needles.
I'm Kiki.
Hi Kiki.
Glad to have you.
Oh did you bring the ball down?
Nice.
Today's a very special episode because tomorrow's my birthday.
Is it?
Yeah.
Oh because it's going to be, alright when it's released.
You're a grown man talking about your birthday you fenn hook.
Calm down.
It's my birthday.
You fenn even wants to send me some money?
You fenn even wants to send money?
Yeah for your transition and your AZT.
Whatever it takes.
You know double threat.
Whatever they want to think.
What's that?
Whatever they want to send it for.
Yeah that's alright maybe we can come up with something.
Maybe you can.
Sounds like you just did.
Maybe we can come up.
Yeah no maybe we can do it.
We can auction off and hang out with Larry all day.
Sugar baby surprise.
Oh man.
We get to pull bongs at eight in the morning.
Six of them at eight in the morning.
Hey I'll bet on that.
Go with Larry to go get coffee for Larry.
It's fun.
Come back pull some more bongs.
Play with the groucho.
It's doll.
Making it sound like too much fun.
It is very fun.
Let me tell you.
It's a sugar baby surprise man.
It really is.
Who knows what's going to happen.
I know you're going to smoke a lot of weed.
And Larry's going to play in his face like a
undulating his gyro gyrating his hips in your face while he plays.
It's going to be very uncomfortable.
That's why he's going to do that.
That's when he does the Mary.
He's sitting on a chair and he comes up and he plays right in her face.
And she's like get away creep.
That's what he is.
It's a huge creep.
Can I hit that thing Larry?
No man.
Not after all that.
I mean listen.
I don't think you don't hit in a woman but you can take the shit out of her if you want it.
That's what I tell you.
You going to pass that dochi or what?
Settle down Theodore.
I was reading about that.
So they got rid of DEI all the positions in the Florida University.
Are we on an uptick now from people being woke?
Oh yeah.
Wait what is DEI stand for?
Diversity.
Equity and inclusion.
Including everybody but white.
It's just like the hiring.
The hiring because of your skin color.
That's all it is.
That's why I'm going to wait until I look like an Iranian in the middle of the summer to go on a job interview.
Why that?
Because I'll be able to cook.
Get benefits.
Don't get a job.
They're going to give you free money.
Why would you want to work Larry?
That too.
I'll get both.
We go to Mexico.
I'll be undocumented.
I'll be able to get the freebies and the job.
We go down to Mexico, get new social security numbers and then we come back here.
If the California bill passes, you get 20% down on your house to buy a house.
Yeah, they're AB what, like 1349 or something.
If that pass is like how, I don't even know how that's even possible.
That is sweet.
Maybe it's that Chinese woman that got the illegal Chinese woman to get a...
Oh she's not illegal.
I'm bored.
She just doesn't speak English.
Is that what it is?
Yeah, she's legal.
She is legal.
But come on.
She got voted on.
I mean, yeah, she's in the, what do you call it, the election committee.
Yeah, yeah.
So you don't see the globalists interjecting this into the election.
Yeah.
I mean, how would you have to be, you have to be just blinders on to not see what's going
on in the situation.
You have to be definitely blind.
But the situation is, is that everybody's like, oh my gosh, we hired a Chinese national
to run our, doesn't speak English.
Yeah, I mean.
I mean, are you kidding me?
So you have to have an interpreter to, to, I mean, to give tasks or to figure stuff
out.
Like, how does that even happen?
Do you think that there's people in China that are just letting Americans come in there
and do all their election bullshits?
No, I don't know.
How did she get voted in?
Like, it's not a public thing.
It's San Francisco.
It's so progressive.
Well, I don't think that's even an office that you get voted into.
It sounds like something you get appointed to.
Yeah, election committee.
It doesn't even sound like anyone knows who she was before she showed up.
And now she's going to oversee the next election, all the other elections, which, right?
If she can't speak English, I'm guessing she can't read English.
Well, why would you if you can't speak English?
You know what I mean?
Good guess, sir, Kiki.
So everything has to be translated.
So now we're using taxpayer dollars to print out Chinese propaganda.
I mean, you can't write this shit.
Well, you can.
No.
Somebody already wrote this 10 years ago.
You're like, hey, we're going to throw this at the wall and see if it sticks.
Yeah, you're sure.
American people are shills.
I've never seen it, but I've seen shows that this woman was on.
The one from Seinfeld.
She was Veep, I guess.
Oh, yeah.
Julia loves to read.
And they showed like scenes from that.
And then they show Kamala Harris.
And it's like, oh, my God, it's exactly the same.
It's like, wow.
Are they kidding?
Yeah.
She really can't even form a sentence.
It was really remarkable how the rhetoric that she spits out to try to get to a conclusion.
You're like, what?
Is she running circles in your brain?
Yeah.
The space is great.
She thinks she's the same.
The devil on that wheel just ran off and he's running wild up there.
They're giving her the opposite of what they're giving Biden.
She's on like dummy pills.
Yeah.
Oh, man.
She is.
But you know what?
They hired her for her skin color.
You know, the America they just said.
And because she had a vagina.
That's what they want to do for a big mic.
A vixen.
Like, they big mic they want to use to try, you know, for compassion and sympathy.
And that'll be the first woman in office without a vagina.
It'll be the first African-American.
That's how they'll look at it.
But you don't know.
We might have surgery.
It'll be the first African-American man with the cock and balls and breast.
Mm-hmm.
They'll be a tranny.
Yeah.
First transgender in the office.
Which, hey, listen, man, we already talked about this.
Let your freak flag flow.
Yeah.
If you want to do, come out and like I said, the climate for the society right now is you
will be totally applauded for this.
You're so brave.
I say that's a fucking, well, it's an abomination in God's eyes.
I'll tell you.
Well, I mean, it's more than God's eyes.
But, yeah.
Whatever floats your boat, man, just don't do it in front of me.
Whatever lifts your skirt.
Uh-huh.
It's like, don't float so fast.
Whatever blows wind up your, wait, what?
Yeah.
Do what you want.
But don't.
I saw this thing where it showed, OK, people, they wanted to make sure that people were
dead so they would do these different things like tests to make sure they died.
Like in 1800s.
OK, medieval times.
Yeah, medieval times.
One of the things was actually before the 1800s, actual medieval times, they'd put urine
in the people's mouth figuring if they were just in a coma, they'd be like, ah, get that
out of there.
And one of the other things is they would blow smoke up their ass with a fucking long tube.
And that's where the fucking phrase, are you blowing smoke up my ass?
But that's wonderful.
This guy's like, hey, I got an idea.
Let's test it.
Let's stick this in their ass and let it blow in.
Exactly.
If you're blowing smoke up their ass, they're going to go, all right, dude.
Oh, how about you just hold a flame to their finger?
You don't have to go to the addicts.
This is, this is, I didn't make these rules.
I'm just saying what they did.
Some of the things they did.
My buddy was talking about it.
And they did other gross shit, too.
Those are the two things that stick out in my mind.
Well, they would do those, they would do that stuff where they would, they would shit on
a spike and then you would be held, your arms would be tied up and it'd be right by your
ass.
And then you would, you'd get tired and you'd slowly squat down until you die.
Kind of games where they play.
Well how about the other thing where they showed the bamboo shoot grow through the fucking
guys body in three days.
Like seven days it was.
I thought it was more like, well, maybe it was seven.
I think it was seven days to kill them.
But it was fucking brutal, man, because this thing was not even touching his back when
it starts.
And they tie him down over this little shoot that's this tall, man.
And then the thing grows through his back.
And they would get multiple ones.
Like they would lay them and then get through their legs.
It goes out of the front of his stomach, Kiki.
And it's growing in it.
And because I guess when these things are, our babies are super fucking shy.
Yeah.
They just pierce right through his legs.
And multiple through his legs, through his groin, through his neck, through your head.
It just grows through slowly, but quickly, but very slowly, when it's going through your
body.
It feels like brutality.
Yeah, we're the person it's growing through.
Yeah.
Imagine, you know what, everybody's, Kiki's done a lot worse.
You know what I mean?
Like we don't have it that bad.
Yeah, that's what I'm saying.
Dissentery and we call it black plague and all of these things.
It's all fun shit.
We even just get eaten by a tiger.
We were talking about this before too, boys, when they, and now I'm when they would like
shit on the end of those sticks and have them in the traps where they would get caught
by these things.
And even if the wound from the initial impact didn't kill them, yeah, they're going to die.
So there's a lot of horrible things.
They gave fever malaria.
They drug the water.
They do everything.
They get friendly fire than just all the animals.
Yeah, the jungle is not a good place for a human.
Dude, the elephant grass getting cut up like razor blades.
Yeah.
And you have to worry about, yeah, snakes.
Did they say they bamboo the thing grew to like astronomically tall, like 20 feet tall
in like a week or two weeks or something?
It was really fast.
It was the fastest growing.
It was very, very fast.
It was a little period of time that I imagine somebody figured that out because they probably
found a dead body where bamboo was growing.
Yeah.
Oh no, they just, it just grew fast.
So they had to think of heinous ways to kill people.
Yeah.
But at one point they probably did find a dead guy that fell on top of him.
Yeah.
The thing goes through them.
This is a, dude, it'd have been alive when that happened.
It would have been horrible.
That's a hell of a torture.
Yeah.
I think they, I love the, let me show the cutouts of all the tunnels that they had.
Oh yeah.
And there would just be, it would be a stick by like a trap door, but you wouldn't be able
to see it.
There'd be a cobra in there.
Yeah.
And you crawl past that bitch and that bastard drops on you.
And you're done.
Yeah.
You know?
Or they would fill, or you would crawl into this one point of the tunnel and it'd be a
dead end and they'd flood it.
Yeah.
Oh man.
Brutal.
They're playing Russian roulette.
Yeah.
They were.
Hey, we should go and do a tour of that and do a Larry and Needle's episode from the Vietnam
Tunnels.
Yeah.
From the tunnels?
Those tunnels are tough to get into.
Well, don't they have tours?
Yeah, they have tours.
They have tours.
I couldn't squeeze in the tunnel.
Yeah.
They're small.
Oh yeah, dude.
They're small.
Those guys are tiny.
They didn't gouge them out for tourists.
No, they weren't thinking that it would generate tourism dollars in 20 years.
Yeah, they went one round eye going down there.
Dude, the traps are crazy.
It'd just be like two wheels with spikes on it and you'd walk on and you'd fall in between
it and just spike your ass.
Yeah.
And you had to pay up pits of snakes.
Yeah, right.
Tree shit.
Like crazy stuff.
Well, my dad's friend Jimmy would tell us from, and just in now they would make these,
the pits with the bungee sticks with all the sticks down there.
Oh yeah.
Like the ones they would put the shit on.
Oh yeah.
So you're walking through and you just fall through some kind of thing that looks like
it's covered.
Yeah.
So are you going to have a walking stick or something?
I don't know.
I thought you had the grunts first.
Yeah, you're going to have a boy walking in front of you.
Hey you, get over here.
I'm sure you're going to go later.
I'm not going to say it.
Operation human shield.
I mean, the funny thing is, do you think of, how many wars has the United States government
totally blown out of proportion?
All of them.
And actually said what's going on is completely different than the narrative that is actually
going on.
All of them.
I mean, the whole thing started in Cambodia with troops over there and then all of a sudden
Vietnam because it's communist.
We want to overthrow them.
And the Ho Chi Minh trail and all this crap.
And the big thing that was that a body count, everybody wanted a body count on TV every
night.
Oh yeah.
How many of those guys they killed?
I was about to say something really horrible.
But yeah.
And also, I had to restrain myself.
It was the first time that there was full on media coverage of a war with live nightly
footage on the news and shit.
And so that was, you know, propaganda and psyopsis to fuck with the American people.
Well, not only that, but also to pull on the heartstrings of the tree huggers and, you know,
it did a lot of different things to a lot of different people.
Yeah, they came back from war and they were spit on and they were like subhumans and nobody
realized these people got drafted.
Yeah.
They couldn't.
And no choice.
And when the guy hops as you do this, you got to do that.
And if you don't, you're going to jail.
You're fucking done.
You're going to Canada.
You know?
Well, if you can get to Canada, you're going to go to jail more than likely if they already
have your ass.
Dodge drafter like Bill Clinton.
Yeah, I was just going to say.
A draft dodger.
Not a Dodge drafter.
Yeah, draft dodger.
You know what I meant.
That's even better.
Dodge drafter.
Yeah, right?
Like that.
Oh, but yeah, good old Billy Clinton starting his lustrous career off.
Swig willing.
That's for sure.
That's sacks loving man.
He was knee deep in some.
Oh, he's knee deep in Poon Tang.
That's what he was knee deep in.
But here's the best.
That guy is a sociable appetite for women.
He was a womanizer.
As we found out in an episode or two ago that Clinton is actually younger than Trump and
White.
Yeah, I was just like, wow.
25 years ago, I think it was.
He is shot, man.
He looks like shot.
Dude, he looks like he looks like a crypt keeper from that fucking TV show.
But now Trump is going to be able to just goes to show that.
No, right now he's still younger.
I know, I told you this.
I know.
That's the part that's blowing my mind.
But the part is crazy that also think about how yummy was when he was the president.
Yeah, he was cool.
So 81 year olds are running this.
He's only like 25, 30 years older than Monica Lewinsky at the time.
He's just 50.
I think he was in his 50s.
Yeah, legal.
He was in his 36.
What's that?
To be present, you gotta be 36.
Yeah.
Does Monica Lewinsky have an only fans?
No, she has a new thing going on where she's doing like she's starting a company like for
voting.
They're poor girl.
No, dude, you know what?
Listen, I think she's wonderful.
She's smoking hot now.
But at the same time, this is what you're known for.
What do you mean she's smoking hot now?
She was very, what do you call it?
Young and ambitious.
Yeah, ready to suck.
And when this man of power tells you to do this, the president of the United States
looks like it's like the number one.
So you would do it.
Would you do it?
I think the illusion of having a globe in every classroom.
It's more predictive programming like oh, there's a globe in every classroom and a dick
in every mouth.
Everybody loved Slick Willie.
Yeah, he was a people choice.
I liked him.
He was a people person.
I thought he was great.
He'd be out, he'd be playing.
He played on our show.
He was a hall.
Yeah.
When all that shit was happening with Lewinsky, me and my friends would be at work talking,
just laughing about it, thinking it was the funniest fucking thing.
Nobody cared.
The young generation.
Nobody was my young.
And you don't know any better.
And then when you realize that this guy molested a girl in the Oval Office.
Yeah.
Yeah, but how old was she?
She was 20.
Okay, well, that's legal tender.
It's not that it's legal tender.
It's just like the power.
Yeah, it kind of is.
It's a legal tender.
Of course it took advantage of her.
I think money can't say legal tender.
But I didn't think of their perversion ways of saying the legal tender.
I mean it's one thing, Lazy.
Yeah, I mean, I think money can't say legal tender.
But I didn't think of their perversion ways of saying the legal tender.
I mean it's one thing, Lazy.
You know, he's sticking cigars in her and stuff.
Yeah, and then smoking them.
Oh man.
I mean this guy's got a real creeper's ointment.
You gotta get him wet.
Yeah.
Well, you'd use your butt to cut it.
The butt cut her.
I mean, if I was president, oh man, look out.
If you were president, you'd do the same thing that the Kennedys did.
Yeah.
You'd be a womanizing.
I mean, if she was allowed.
Yeah.
Everyone's fooling us to go in that lead box.
Yeah.
What did you think about that?
There's no pictures of Kennedy really colluding with him.
Because back then they needed to set up a fucking tripod in a big box and a flag.
People wanted to take pictures.
They wasn't like cameras.
They were really nilly.
They looked like the hidden ones now.
No, but they could still take pictures, so.
But there's really no…
I'm sure there's pictures on top of that one.
There's no evidence.
The only evidence of Kennedy is his Obruder films.
Yeah, there's really not that much about it.
Yeah, it knows it.
Did we talk about that?
How about with Marilyn Monroe?
Oh, yeah.
How she went to his party and she was not supposed to go
and she sung the Happy Birthday, Mr. President.
And then that's when she, that's when she was like,
they had to offer.
They have to take her out
because she's getting too big for her britches.
Yeah, yeah, right.
For Marilyn.
Because they said, it was funny,
this guy broke it down.
Well, here's the other thing.
They say that Kennedy was like, you know, this is all logic.
He's gay and that Jackie, oh, was actually, you know,
Jackie, Jackie, you know, was actually his cousin.
And Larry, I mean.
It was just all a front.
It really wasn't a front.
He was a f-f-fnuck.
He was what, that's, that was the word on the street, man.
He was a puss layer, man.
That's kind of what he said.
That was the image they put up for him
because the truth of the fact was he was a flamer.
He was a rock-hunting kind of fellow.
Yeah, he was a rock type guy.
But I don't think at all, what do you call it?
I don't find that to be true.
Yeah, I don't find it.
I don't find it to be alive.
Everybody.
Who do you, do you know anyone that he nailed?
Huh?
Who did he nail?
Yeah, it was Marilyn Monroe.
She's dead.
He can't ask her.
All these women came forward and said that they were.
They said he was Marilyn, Marilyn, Marilyn.
No, but they had, all these women came forward
and said they had an external affair with him.
All the women loved him, that's for that.
It's all a side out.
He was a boot, what do you mean it's a side out?
All the women loved Liberace too.
Oh, that was a little bit different.
That guy was a flamboyant finook and we all knew he was gay.
Well, this guy could be.
Not like Rock Hudson.
He could be flamboyant finook because he was the president.
You think everybody's gay, Larry.
Yeah, he'd keep it in the closet.
That is your conspiracy theory.
No.
That everybody's gay.
This is something that I listened to.
Yeah, on what, finook radio?
Yeah.
Finook one.
He's in your mouth.
Finook 102.
You gotta put the receiver in your mouth.
So anyways, that is the fucking story, man.
The guy was a fruit and he fucking covered it up
by making this big fantasy.
I'm glad you talk about our first Irish-American president.
I was just kidding.
Can I say?
I mean, come on, Larry.
Those Catholics, man, they do some evil, weird, twisted shit.
Dude, the Catholics are great.
I don't know what you're talking about.
They don't do anything evil.
The priest.
The priest do it.
Besides the actual church services.
One of our famous episodes, Rectory Damage killed.
We get into the whole child sex abuse scheme.
Oh, man.
But the Catholic church hides behind.
I mean, the Vatican is the most powerful thing in the world.
And corrupt.
Yeah.
I always wanted to, I wanted to get down to the basement
and see what they have in the basement there.
You better fucking bring a string
so you can get your way back out because they fucking.
Don't kill him.
I don't want to see what they have there.
I know, the basement is usually a one-way trip.
It may be worth it.
If they would let me go down there and just take a look
and then kill me, I'd be happy.
You think that?
I'd be totally happy to do that.
It'd be worth it.
Oh.
That's going up the world's phone.
So she's getting her phone call.
That's Mary's sister calling her.
We got ramshackle operation.
Shout out to Beth.
It was Beth.
Phone's ringing.
What's up, Beth?
It happens every one.
You haven't had Ben here when that happened.
Good thing it's not like on a speaker phone.
Oh, God, yeah.
Oh, my husband's such a jitter.
Stupid Larry's in the basement doing his dumb acts.
He went his dumb friends.
He's not even funny.
Your friends are gay.
They're not funny.
I'm jangling.
They think they're funny.
This isn't really funny.
No, you guys aren't that funny.
Truth is a truth.
We talk about how the truth hurts.
How it's easier perpetuate a lie and just keep going down
rather than somebody being like, hey, listen.
I would never perpetuate a lie.
This is not how it is.
I could admit what's actually happening.
Well, it'd come in at face value.
People don't understand it anymore.
You can't talk to people.
We're not worth the face value.
No, we're barely worth a nickel in this joint.
Legal tender, but at the same time, that should be your
runaways band name.
Legal tender.
Yeah.
You're just scouring the high schools and the malls.
Actually, people don't hang out at malls.
The ad hall.
You can't even say that anymore.
You gotta go online.
Dude, no, they hang out at the gym now.
I'll tell you what, if you go to the gym
at like from six o'clock to nine o'clock in the morning.
No, at nine o'clock.
Okay, wait, let me get a piece of paper.
All the young and really have to write that down.
Dude, the only young and sick people.
I got it already here.
Six o'clock to nine o'clock.
Hang out at the gym between six and nine.
Well, do all the folks sit, like they're all like,
just crowding on the machine and just sit there.
It's like, what is going on here?
It's like, they don't have the malls anymore.
It's like, well, you got to show everybody
you're at the gym.
This is how I get this body.
Oh my God, I don't get it.
I want to see the bulimia.
I want to see puking in the toilet.
That's what I want.
Oh man.
You got to hang around in these.
You're fat phobic.
Hey, I'm not phobic of anything.
What's that?
I'm not phobic of any of them.
I know, we can tell.
Dude, I'm the only one in the sauna.
That's a side effect of easy T.
What do you mean in shorts?
Everyone's naked?
No, I wish.
Oh, that's a co-ed.
Not what's co-ed, but everyone's co-ed.
All the youngers, dude, they got full shoes on,
sweatpants, sweatshirts, jackets.
Are you fucking kidding me?
Dude, this is a sauna.
Get your shits on, dude, what are you doing, bro?
I'm the only one sitting there like short shorts,
and that's it.
Short shorts, you're old nuts are hanging out.
They're lucky, I might have shorts on.
Hey ladies, look at this coin purse.
It's illegal probably to go in there
and fucking command, all right.
I was gonna just wear a towel and go command.
Yes, wear a towel.
And then wreck your meat in there.
But no, it's crazy.
Every girl, they're all co-osed.
Sometimes it's under a towel.
Wait until you get it.
You know what I mean?
Wait until someone walks in though
to make them really uncomfortable.
Whatever it is.
You get up and you bend over and you drop the towel in.
Oh, it's not the cold though, is it?
No, it is.
Pour some water on the racks.
You bend over, right?
Yeah.
Just your toasty nutsack hanging out.
Put your leg up on the table.
Yeah, think about it, it's way better than the pool.
You probably get full meat in there too.
Oh yeah.
You know, you get good girth in the sauna
rather than the pool.
You actually want to be presentable.
Get the blood flowing.
Yeah, you want to show this.
Hey ladies, look at this thing.
The biggest it's going to get today.
Right.
So you come here and influence this thing, the nut.
Yeah, if I could do a couple slaps.
We don't windmills cheer any woman up.
I used to have a girlfriend when she would be bummed out
or angry.
I would do a windmill and she would die
laughing every time.
It always gets a, it always does.
It's great.
And then you do slap it on one leg.
Slap it.
I'll tell you what.
How clockwise you got to do that.
That's a tough one.
I'm just going to go one way and get the other way.
I'll tell you what made Mary laugh was when she goes,
hey, what was, what were you telling me
that Needles was eating in the kitchen?
And I said, oh yeah, he was eating one of your breadsticks
and she just busted out laughing.
Yeah, because you're a fucking knucklehead dude.
Dude, that was funny.
I made myself laugh.
I made you laugh.
I made Mary laugh.
Yeah, for narcing yourself out.
No, narcing me out, I mean.
Yeah, it's hilarious.
Because they had a breadstick.
And that's the fucking fire.
You're such a sneak thief, dude.
It really is.
How am I a sneak thief?
Because you're a tattletale too.
That all encompasses being a sneak thief.
All encompassing.
You do one thing and you're everything.
Yeah, you said it.
I thought it was fucking hilarious because it was,
you know, no big deal.
It really isn't no harm, no fall, but you just have to tell.
Mary, you're eating your breadsticks.
Made her laugh.
That's great.
That is all I care about.
Yeah, that's all you care about.
Why don't you get some new releases in your shoes?
Dude, these shoes are done.
Yeah, I'd say so.
Are you only going to first three holes?
Yeah.
Yep, that's his name in Boys Town.
First three holes.
Three hole airy.
You think I'm going to use them like a bowling ball?
Never gets old.
It really does.
First three holes, that's what it's called.
That wasn't even planned either.
It's like I planned these out.
Like your shoe laces.
I know, it's the worst.
He used to have zip ties and they're like a rapist.
I told that to Sonny last night.
I said, he was talking about kicking someone, you know,
and you use this part of your foot.
And I told him we used to put the zip ties in the,
as laces, just one across each hole.
And that was nice and fucking very abrasive.
Punk rock Velcro, that's all it is.
And his face was like, wow.
He thought that was a pretty good idea.
He's 20 years old.
He doesn't know anything else.
He liked that.
Think about that.
He's only been aware of what 10 years, let's say 10 years old.
Well, he's probably doesn't know anything.
You know what I mean, so let's go to 2014.
It's crazy, like he's been indoctrinated by the internet.
Yeah.
Even though he is a killer.
But he's been studying this stuff,
but he doesn't really know degenerates.
No, he really never been around people.
We're the first degenerates.
No.
We're like the bad uncles.
Yeah.
Every day he's shaking his head like, oh, what's
going to happen today?
Saying the worst stuff.
Like I love telling them that literally he's a sugar baby
and they all start dying.
He doesn't work or have a job.
He just sponges off his wife.
They don't know what they're like.
They just think they freeze, too.
They don't know what to say.
Yeah.
But when Lillian and I signed up,
she thought we were lovers.
She goes in sorry.
So she didn't know how to say it yet.
And I guess it's because of your fucking gay haircut,
needles.
Who are you talking about?
And the girl starts laughing.
She thought it's the energy you give off.
It's not a haircut.
It's a lifestyle, bro.
Oh, Larry was twerking his curls.
No, she literally thought that we were lovers.
Jesus.
And so you're going to put it on your credit card
and they said, yeah, he'll be paying for it.
He's a bomb.
Do we give off that vibe that we're gay lovers?
You must.
Well, do it.
No, both of us must.
The younger generation thinks everybody is now.
I know that is funny.
They got to ask because they don't know.
They don't want to offend anybody.
That's what it was.
She asked if you were a couple.
She was very uncomfortable.
No, because see the way here's the thing.
She's very uncomfortable.
But now she loves us.
You're paying for it on your credit card.
You're paying for me to.
It was only $25.
It wasn't like $1,000.
But still, to her, she doesn't know what's going on yet.
She thought we were gay.
She doesn't realize friends do that stuff.
Yeah.
But she wanted to see.
Well, we thought she was a fur trader, too.
Yeah, I didn't.
I knew she wasn't.
I said she's not.
I mean, Larry.
I said right away, she's not.
And you said, I think she is.
Well, because she was saying her, because that girl was picking her.
Just because one time some fat girl comes to pick up everything.
And she gives off that vibe.
Well, because she's a karate.
She does give off those like, not metropods,
like bisexual vibe.
It's maybe the fucking fifth degree black belt.
I think there's a lot going on there.
I think there is some sexual tension between our teacher
and Ray.
You think?
Yeah.
You don't think?
Hell yeah, I think so.
Oh, I found out.
Oh, they do fight all day?
Well, I found out.
Yeah, they're both the same age, too.
Oh, stinky and sweaty.
No, I think she's older than him.
They're both under 21.
Yeah.
They're both under 21.
Really?
Yeah.
Because I found out she was under 21.
Oh, man.
I'd love to.
That puts a whole new light on things.
Put me in an arm bar.
A sexy arm bar?
Yeah.
That's what I want.
Oh, man.
Put it in my mouth.
Sonny will fucking kick your ass.
Put me in an arm bar.
Fart out of my hand and let me smell it.
Well, she's cool because she gets us.
Yeah.
But we're not like we're douchebags.
No.
Yeah, no, she likes us.
But it's funny, though.
It's just funny because everybody's so serious.
Numbers, man, is so different from us.
Yeah.
Master Nelson is so different from us.
Yeah.
Well, numbers are like 62.
But he's more like us than the numbers, man.
Yeah, but he's also, you know.
Oh, no, did you hear that one day?
You weren't there.
He was talking about Epstein.
Oh, yeah, yeah.
Yeah, no.
Master Nelson was like, I'll tell you, here's
how they killed Epstein.
And he pulled out the garage.
Oh, yeah.
Because, yeah, well, yeah, he pulled out the garage.
And he goes, the coroner said that if he would have hung
himself, it would have been higher up.
It would have been.
Yeah.
He goes, and it was down here.
And it was a real thin bruise.
And he's getting into all these details.
He goes, because they killed Epstein.
You knew he was like, hey, I'm his brother Larry Epstein.
And then he says, and he was a dirtbag,
and he deserved it, too.
He did, definitely.
But the IDF had done it.
And I said, he only probably killed him.
He's like, yeah.
No, the IDF had done it.
I was like, oh, yeah.
He burned his cover.
No, he had done with them.
Master Nelson likes us, too.
They would call it.
They used him up and spit him out.
Yeah, exactly.
Well, I'm still waiting for that Kelly.
What's her name?
Kelly, not Ripoff, but the hot blonde.
She was on Fox.
She got canned.
Kelly.
I don't know.
I don't know who.
Michelle Kelly or Azzon Kelly?
I don't know.
She was talking about how we're going to hear from Epstein.
We actually may hear from him, like he's not dead.
Megan Kelly.
Oh, he's hanging out behind the ice wall with Tupac and Biggie.
Yeah.
No, but you know what?
Michael Jackson.
Mary will tell you that Epstein is still alive.
Yeah, but what's the point of keeping him alive?
Well, if he wanted to stay alive.
That's another who knows.
He may have got him.
He's already been used up.
I mean, now he could start another island.
I know.
He may have got out there now.
He wants to spill the beans on all these guys
because they screwed him over.
Listen, man, it's just like that whole thing with JFK Jr.
And they're like, he's still alive and he's going to come back.
Like, no.
He's definitely still alive.
Everything is fake.
Larry, can I hit the bonk, please?
Yeah, JFK Jr. is still alive.
Everything is fake.
It's not what it seems.
The media puts all this bullshit into our heads.
And these lemmings believe it.
There's no inflation.
Yeah, they do both sides.
There's no inflation.
My wife.
Everything's fine.
Do you know what I mean?
What do you call it?
The border is fine.
The economy is fine.
We're not printing so much more money.
And I spent $6 trillion in my last year as president.
I'll tell you what's fine.
My Bitcoin wallet.
It's doing just fine.
We were talking about that also, how Bitcoin is.
Because it's not.
It's what's that?
What's that called?
A fiat.
Oh, fiat money.
Yeah, fiat money.
Yeah.
Fiat currency.
Yeah, fiat currency.
Which is what our.
And it's not controlled by any government.
Which is what our.
It's an entity.
But then on Jones.
It's decentralized.
But Jones was saying, what the fuck if the power goes out?
And you can't get access to all of this stuff.
If the power goes out, you can't get access to anything anyways.
It doesn't matter.
That's why you need cash and guns.
Bitcoin is the fifth largest currency in the world right now.
It's taking no way out.
It's taking no room.
We have the US dollar.
This is cashed.
The yuan, Chinese yuan, you want whatever you want to cash.
You want to call it.
You have the Japanese yen.
Then you have the European euro and then Bitcoin.
That's pretty crazy.
Yeah.
Well, there's no.
It's limitless.
And you can mine it.
Well, no, it is.
It's limited.
That's the beauty of it.
Well, but I mean, it's limitless as in that.
You know what the real money is?
You can keep on making it.
Mining of the gold and the diamonds.
That's where you really want to do the mining.
I love the beers.
I'm all about blood diamonds.
I want 50 of them.
I want 50.
Well, I don't know.
I refuse any other type of diamond.
Yeah, exactly.
I want to see the guy who died getting this mine.
Every diamond should have a fingerprint stamp of blood
with the button.
Or like a video clip so you can see him.
You hold the diamond up.
Why?
Is that how it works?
Each person dies for diamonds.
That's what I want in my company.
That's how I think about it.
I want blood diamonds.
Some little kid that no sandals on.
They've screwed him in the head.
They've been missing an arm because he got landmine or something.
And they say, get in that hole.
That's fine.
Your arm's fine.
And that's where the diamond actually needs something.
Get in that hole.
Get up.
And he goes in and digs.
Yeah, that's where it takes you.
Feel good digger.
Yeah, you remember that diamond.
I mean, man, like the whole family's about to dig.
Get up.
You ain't hurt digger.
The whole family.
And the kid goes back in there.
Grandpa was a digger.
He's a digger.
Yeah.
Grandson was a digger.
Dude, you know what?
That sounds like a fucking shit job.
Oh, you think Larry?
Yeah.
What gave you that idea?
I know.
How did you come to that?
They probably can't even keep any of the diamonds, I'm sure.
So fucking damn.
They don't give any diamonds.
Did your children get half of what they're getting?
That's how they pay them.
Yeah.
They pay them in diamonds.
They're all rich.
Yeah.
They're all rich little kids.
But they just have to get in there because they're diggers.
Yeah.
They're in their blood.
They retire.
They retire by like nine.
Then they become retired diggers.
They retire by nine years old.
Yeah.
I don't know about that.
That's, I mean, that's a digger's dream.
Well, because they haven't.
They haven't.
Yeah.
Those are the rare diggers.
Yeah.
Those are the real hardworking diggers.
We all know about that.
And there's not many of them hardworking diggers out there.
Oh, man.
But they'd stamp approval with their blood on there.
That's crazy.
That's like their retirement.
I didn't see the movie Blood Diamonds, but.
What's that?
I didn't see the movie Blood Diamonds.
You didn't see that?
Oh, man.
You want to hear a great movie?
Yeah.
Oh, man.
You know what I'm saying?
So there was this guy.
OK.
He worked in the mine.
And he would eat the diamonds.
And he shit them.
And there would be blood on it.
So it was a blood diamond.
That's where the term came from.
But what happened was it would, it would like,
taking all the nutrients.
From the blood and the shit.
I mean, he had, you know what I mean?
He had sickle cells.
So it was very crazy, the blood that he was producing.
It lacked a lot of things, you know, like a work ethic.
And wanting to stay with your family.
And not hit the woman.
But it put a sheet in the dark.
Yeah.
But it made his soul glow.
Let me get that Larry, please.
So this guy, they couldn't figure out who this, you know,
the blood diamond guy was.
But so what happened was they were trying
to match the DNA from his blood.
But he was blood with the hippo.
So yeah, yeah, yeah.
He had blood.
Or a monkey blood, I mean, sorry.
He is interested in banged monkeys.
He had blood in his stool probably.
And that's where they found AIDS too.
Yeah.
And COVID.
This guy was just a recipient.
And his rudder.
And he was the trifecta.
I don't think that's what the blood diamond.
I don't believe you on that.
You don't believe me on that.
No.
You got to see this movie.
Yeah, it is kind of unbelievable.
But it's not as good as it was.
I know they send little diggers into the cave
and fucking put them down fucking mine shafts
and work them to death.
But isn't that or is it blood diamonds?
Because people are getting killed delivering them.
No, the blood diamonds are the people that are giving their blood
up to mine them.
Yeah, that's what I thought.
I mean, that's the way it sounds.
They're not mining them in like caves or anything.
This is like out in the open.
It's an open pit.
Yeah.
It's drip mining.
Dude, these diggers just like to hang out right around the pit.
That makes sense.
Yeah.
Yeah, you have the old diggers watching over the younger
diggers.
And the old diggers are just cracking jokes.
Yeah.
And they're the ones taking all the diamonds.
I'm sure.
Those are like the middlemen.
They're the liaison for the older diggers.
So it's a dangerous fucking job.
It sounds like a good job.
It's not that it's dangerous.
They just work the shit out of you.
Yeah.
There's no rules.
There's no governing body.
Nobody cares about your feelings or lunch breaks.
Get in that hole, digger.
Right.
There's no lunch breaks.
You're going to take a shit digger and go over that hole.
Over there and not in the diamond hole.
You take a hole digger and you've got a shit digger.
Yeah, exactly.
Then they have to tell the other diggers not to dig where they
just don't.
You know, shit.
They're like, oh, man, this is a real bad digger.
They probably got a digger shit pit right when they get to work.
Well, the other thing is, you know, this is where we're
going to shit today.
I don't know about that.
I think they have latrines.
The diggers in charge.
It's a sophisticated.
The head digger in charge.
He had to dig through the shit after the other digger.
Make sure you don't endive in it.
Put the blood diamond.
Exactly.
Because it's a shit digger.
Exactly.
They're dedicated.
Nobody wants that job.
Dedicated shit diggers.
That is a fucked up position.
Yeah, the only thing is the juxtaposition of having to dig
through diggers.
That's one of the worst jobs in the whole digging industry.
Well, that was a whole specialty.
You think you'd just get a hose and a screen or maybe
a bunch of stuff on a screen.
But you know, there's the whole.
They didn't have all that water to waste.
No, yeah.
I mean, the climate is perfect for diggers.
A little top there, right?
Yeah.
A lot of sweaty diggers.
They didn't wear much clothes.
You know how shoeless diggers.
Sounds crazy.
Yeah.
I'd like to visit there.
You would.
You might need my shit to work.
Oh, man.
I'll be a digger.
Listen here, digger.
I'll go out.
Grandfather did.
Oh, man.
It sounds like an excellent place.
No, it's not.
Actually, it's in the middle.
This is an afterthought.
It's in digger country.
You like skin digger.
Come here.
Yeah.
The Milano digger.
Where'd you come from?
He just got binocca on.
Oh, man.
What's it?
Zinca?
What was that called?
Remember the zinc?
Yeah.
They put it on his nose.
Yeah.
He's not like underneath his eye.
Just a swarm of flies.
Yeah.
Oh, man.
That's the only thing.
Oh, man.
Like, this digger don't work.
Yeah.
He's the opposite because he's white.
He's not as good as the other diggers.
He's complaining and all.
He's not as good as the other diggers.
So hot out.
Oh, no.
I like that.
That's what the umbrella is.
You know those hats with the umbrella?
Yeah.
Well, that's where the term wigger came from because he was a white digger.
Oh.
So it was the wigger.
I see.
Yeah.
So that's where I would be a wigger.
Yeah.
So, you know, I would be a wigger.
Yeah.
So, you know, I would be a wigger.
Yeah.
So they probably would allow you to wear whatever hat you want.
If you had one of those umbrella hats, I'm sure anything goes.
The diggers get a worn hat.
Yeah.
I know, but if you did have one, I'm sure they don't care since there's no OSHA.
You have a 10 gallon cowboy hat.
Exactly.
The foam one.
The really, really big one.
Yeah, the 10 gallon.
No, the 10 gallon is a regular cowboy hat.
Like the Gumbier.
Yeah, you know what I mean.
The gigantic one.
Yeah, the Gumbier.
The Gumbier.
The Grand並 well.
The Gumbier.
Yeah, you're cut-off shorts.
The Grand並 well.
The D trays.
some kind of little motorbike and deliver messages to the boss and the lord diggers.
Your hat will blow off though.
No man, we'll strap it together.
It's just flapping in the wind and they're like, look at this digger.
Who's this digger's the gear?
Yeah, who's this digger's the gear?
Get back to work digger.
Oh boy.
Oh shoot.
You have to earn that roll.
Well, there is one lazy digger.
Real funny.
Crazy digger.
You want to do your fortune cookie 500?
Sure.
I didn't do one last episode. Let Kiki hit the gong.
Where is the mallet?
It's underneath it.
Underneath it.
Underneath it. That's what that means.
Underneath it.
No, you didn't. You looked above it.
No, I looked underneath it.
I see it.
I looked in the ceiling.
Fortune cookie 500.
He's going to forget where he was like he's all.
Very unimorable.
He did actually.
Fortune cookie 500.
This is brought to you by the spirit of Pat Terry.
Oh boy, here we go.
You bought a respectful fortune cookie 500.
Now this one.
You already read that one.
Razy digger.
This one's not even.
This one's kind of dumb because it doesn't have.
Well then don't read it.
You talking to play the tape.
Improvise.
Okay, this thing stinks but I'm going to read it to you.
You have a deep appreciation of arts and music.
See, that's not a.
That's what it is.
You have a deep appreciation for arts.
I don't know about arts though.
It's just like a guess at the person.
The partial arts.
Okay, the next one will be.
Your wife do push-ups at a pickle patch.
That's a fortune.
My dad said that to someone on the chain.
I remember in the car.
We were little.
And we did not know what it meant.
And we didn't know what it meant.
And then one day I got older.
He realized.
And I was like, mate, you know what that meant?
And he's like, what?
And then I had to explain it to him.
Your wife says push-ups at a pickle patch.
Dude, we didn't know what.
I mean, he just threw the ultimate curve ball.
We were dumbfounded.
Like, when will we appreciate this?
Yeah.
It was like.
Right.
It was like.
That's the part that he didn't think was going to happen.
No, he didn't.
Well, no, he knew it was going to happen.
He put it in a way where he won't understand it.
He was an Asian dude.
They won't understand until they get older.
Yeah.
But they'll remember because of so scared.
Dude, it is the greatest burn.
I have said.
And this is roll window down and yell at a guy.
So Jay had to roll.
I had to roll.
I had to roll window down.
He was in the middle.
My fat little arms are rolling.
The wind.
He's just waiting to come up with a sweet burn.
That's an Asian guy.
Back in the 80s.
He was like, 80s Asian.
Nice.
And this dude.
Oh my god, the look on his face when he said it.
Oh, dude.
He had to stream it over his two kids.
The guy probably didn't know.
I'll never forget it.
Because it was just so loud.
Right in your face.
The guy probably didn't know what he was saying.
Your wife does push out of the window.
Yeah.
I'm on a pickle.
On a pickle patch.
You have pickles, you would have patches.
You're really confusing me.
And they stick straight up.
Why is she doing push themselves?
Yeah, wait a minute.
She's naked.
What's going on?
There's a lot to dissect here.
It's an excellent image.
I can see a cucumber patch.
Yeah.
That's funny.
It is very funny.
Oh man.
Back then, shit man.
I remember we'd be like little kids and my uncles
just telling us the dirtiest jokes.
And then we would go to school and tell them.
And now he's like,
you can't even do that anymore.
Like there's no more fun in school.
You gotta be afraid to get an idea.
I told you about, we would have
once a week
in our homeroom teacher
would be like, okay, yeah, if you could bring in a record.
We'll have like record day.
And all these kids would bring in different fucking records.
Sean Cassidy in some bullshit.
And I brought in
Richard Pryor.
That N-word is crazy.
Thanks for your time.
And the teacher's like,
we can't play this.
And I'm like, why not?
You let everyone else play.
And so then me and my buddy Jeff
and then of course the black kid
that was in the class with us
Rob McGee.
Yeah, well we did.
We said, Richard Pryor joke.
So I said, I'll bring in a Richard Pryor record
for record day.
And we're all like, yeah.
And so we're back in the teacher's.
Yeah, no, they're like, no, no.
Yeah, I mean, come on.
We're not playing this.
Yeah, because if you start a lawsuit
or people are going to appear, you're going to get pissed.
But it wouldn't have been a lawsuit back then.
The kids probably would have laughed.
No, just a bunch of white kids saying N-word.
All of a sudden these kids learning new words.
Yeah, more than just that.
Yeah, definitely enough for children.
Yeah, more than just N-word.
A lot of new words.
So yeah, the teacher nixed it
and said, although later
it was very funny.
They said, it is a funny album.
We can't listen to this.
We can't listen to a comedy through an album.
It's crazy, right?
It's so funny. I still got the fucking same album.
We should hang up in the back.
Once in my record somewhere.
Yeah, we should hang that up in the back.
You have a lot of records over there.
There's a whole bunch more under there, back there.
Wow.
We used to listen to them all the time.
I used to go upstairs.
I got more in that other fucking room.
Holy shit.
I'd like to build a giant
shelf and have a library.
Don't work out.
A separate shelf for that.
That's actually going to be called
the pickle patch.
Yeah.
This is news stories.
That's my fantasy to have my records
so I can get at them all in one fucking room.
So they have them scattered
all over the fucking house.
Right.
Hey, what ever happened to the Forge?
Did you read The Forge?
Yeah, I didn't read the second one.
Yeah, with the hack, man.
We got into the pickle patch
story.
Here we go.
Forza Cookie 500.
You went away. China win.
China control you.
You don't know yet.
Put Tic Tac on to destroy your brain.
Okay.
Creative energy is up.
Capitalize on it.
God, these are so enthralling.
This sucks.
We didn't want to cast it there.
Creative energy is up.
Capitalize on it.
Creative energy is up.
Capitalize on it.
I guess you know make money off of it.
I don't think there is really any creative.
There's nothing creative going on right now.
It seems like.
Besides this podcast.
Well, but
it seems like everything
is just done artificially.
AI, music,
editing, auto-tuner,
all that crap. Everything can be manipulated.
Everybody's getting lazy.
Nobody wants to be normal anymore.
Everybody wants to deviate from...
You were a mechanic. You'll hear all the mistakes.
I want a BBL.
I want a boob job. I want my lips done.
I don't want to use the DJ's.
Because this is what TikTok says.
There's a new trend this week.
That's what I'm going to do.
American Walker, Rayzy.
Randa Rayzy.
That's it.
That's my UFC name.
Randa Rayzy.
Yeah Randa Rayzy.
He's Randa Rayzy.
Randa Rayzy.
Rayzy Laundy.
I'll have the only guy that buys regular sunglasses out there.
import them from the only ones that are big enough they're not like what do you
call it little floss little thin little granny glasses like from the 60s that's
all they need the C that's alright they got nothing thicker than a reader
the whole fucking place China let's look at them all you know scared of China
through Japan do we drop two nuclear bombs I do obsess over people we tell
people witness that we talked about this there was a watch up for sale from
Hiroshima and it was all burnt out and shit it was like melted it was going for
like 50 grand who the hell's buying the glass I had the cash raise you know if I
had a cash I totally buy that be wearing that motherfucker right now it's just
going to show how our military industrial complex does whatever it wants I
get that watch that watch and put on one of those thick 70s I wouldn't wear it
those thick 70s risk oh the big bands yeah I wouldn't wear it man watch man
that is a reminder of the death clock and probably is radioactive too oh yeah
it's definitely kept to give I mean you got you can have your watch on with your
UV light next to it you need more than that
yeah what do you do with something like that
you gotta put it in a box man yeah like box like they make a there's a case
that they could put in there but so you get purpose of having a hey in this box
is a no I'm sure you can figure something out I mean unless you want to die
really we're all gonna die what's radiation well that's exactly like in it
radiation anymore no I don't know I don't know yeah only has a thousand years
that's been what a hundred years talking thousands of years
radioactive well but that's a watch periodic table you need thousands of
half-lives just well but the watch I mean who knows how much radiation that
puppy got it was that guy was wearing it yeah well so he got to do when we put
him in the microwave they got my way to so I mean it's got to give off some
sort of radiation we ever talk about the tests like they did out in white sands
when John Wayne his family oh yeah movie out in the Southwest it's very
interesting well they did a lot of testing on our own soil yeah they were
down like Hollywood was down when filming someone was John Wayne movies well
even when they were testing in the deserts and like Moab and it got in the
jet stream yeah they didn't really go to Russia when Three Mile Island happened
they actually got a good descriptive way of how nuclear particles get into the
jet stream and how far they can travel and they were people were getting sick
in Europe you know I got stuck in that jet stream and it just flow man like our
dude the stuff we do to our own people is egregious and we get it and they get
away with it I mean come on always thanks to Ronnie Reagan for saying that we
can't sue pharmaceutical companies because because he was in be a 1985
yeah it cuz he was in bed with the farm big pharma yeah it's like which
politics which which president which politician is every listen every frickin
president that we've had is a horrible horrible person starting with George
Washington down and he's black George Washington okay you've seen the AI
pictures of him right well that's I mean well they would only do they would only
do African-American anybody you pull us a picture of a Nazi soldier and they
show black fella yeah that's funny yeah that's very and they show a Chinaman to
what if like yeah you put up like Hunter Biden crack smoker would that guy
because you put crack smoker would they leave him white though just probably
they say we won't show a negative image of a white person
unless it's bad here's the deal AI is fed an initial thing you know woke or not
yeah the creator you know like the creator that's what they feed it the best
is they had to take that AI off because it got racist in like a week it was like
saying the truth about things
racist AI that would be great that could be our fourth Mike just a racist AI
get away with it then if they say well like that yeah there's a thing we'd
have to have an AI that someone that programmed it wasn't some woke ass
snowflake that's what he's talked about yeah where do you get that no with the
parameters are you like Musk he can you just created that rock or was it called
yeah shoot I can't remember I forget what it's called but yeah he created like
that yeah it's the anti AI kind of it's the model that they said it is not woke
it's not like they actually fed it good things they didn't say white people are
bad truth those right well no but these are that's manipulated though the AI is
that they these DI companies interjecting to it oh yeah it's told that white
people are bad the narrative is completely changed that it won't write
anything bad about Joe Biden or any Biden well it's right anything good about
Trump at all no matter what you ask I don't know about that it won't you don't
ever see any debates and like a college campus where all the college kids like
oh no well here look I'm looking it up right now on my phone and they anything
they pop up is fact yeah well to do a bunch of hero he does they're done the
colleges yeah and the kids are reading an article off of their phone and it's like
yeah did you even look because now they have to write if the articles been
created by AI so you'll see that when you get stories and our eyes written them
oh pretty crazy dude I was just doing a side job at a teacher that she was
talking about how they had to basically reprimand a student because now well
they have two students have to download their work now to a program that checks
it for plagiarism across the country wow yeah but it doesn't work against
Harvard presidents right yeah right that's gay she gets by yeah yeah but then
they figured out this girl really gay yeah she used AI to write the right this
whole thing and she didn't change it like any words she just used AI word for
words like yeah so then they came down on her said you know this and that and
she had to write apology letter and the teacher's like you know just for shits
and giggles I'm gonna see if this was AI generated it was the girls apology
letter was totally crazy so relying on something to write for you like that
that is all shoot yeah but that's good I mean honestly I'm gonna write my resume
or resume or something or it were about an hour we are I gotta read this already
yeah man yeah it's crazy how AI just it's it's it's it's it's actually pretty
all ignorance it is ignorant starts I know some people using it for work though
for every it saves time even for editing all just crazy stuff look at this hand
little written letter I got handwritten envelope from where you got a pen pal is
this where you're right now I from prison chicks in prison you know what
neighbor I hope this finds you well and safe in these troubled times that we are
enduring that you remain healthy and positive and thought this letters is
intent is to help find any who have a longing to learn about more what the
Bible has to say about the critical times that we are in living in to Timothy
3 1 oh yeah to Timothy 3 1-5 the JWs the JWs
Joe was witnesses trying to recruit me dude did bring them in the pod
yeah you gotta go around and you know knock on doors and do all that shit I
don't know about that yeah you do when you're okay I don't know about me doing
that oh yeah I don't care about what they have to do I'm not going door to door
for young Mormons do that shit well I'm sure the JWs do it too so that's crazy
pretty crazy they actually wrote like dude you know what the pot has to do you
guys you guys gotta go like get some pen pal kingdom hall wow man they actually
shoot no one saw that you guys have a head you guys got to start writing some
female prisoners in prison yeah we talked about yeah that's a good thing that
then we got to start getting some conical visits here goes although the Bible
foretold these critical last days it also reveals a very bright and peaceful
future on earth revelation 21 3-4 yeah after how many years of destruction look
the tent of God is my is mankind is about look the tent of God is with mankind
and he will reside with them and they will be his people and God himself will
be with them and he will wipe out every tear from their eye and death will be no
more amen either will mourning or outcry nor pain be anymore that's right no
more blood blood diamond man that's when you go up to
great movie title
blood diamond
is this doing blackface on the phone
who's my little buddy
you got a handful of diamonds
and the midgets you roll with
yeah
amen Gary Coleman
like Gaddafi had women do his is it all
security he has midgets
David Lee Roth had midgets
did he have midgets
David Lee Roth had midgets
he had midgets
yeah for his security
yeah yeah and he even had one midget bodybuilding lady
there was a midget bodybuilder
I can see that it sounds like that's a oxymoron
yeah it's fucking crazy
she was totally jack
big ass head
yeah yeah
monster
they all had monster heads
they looked like the Easter Island
and he thought that was funny to have that
I think that's hilarious don't you
it's the funniest thing you could do
yeah I mean
he was pretty funny too
he could find for himself yeah
so I guess that's why I brought the midgets
he was employing him
you know
but that's just funny he could kick anybody who had them
he could kick their ass but he's like
I got these little guys just for shits and giggles
dude he was a badass
it's funny
it's very funny
so shout out to the JWs for hitting me up
yeah
at this time it declined your offer
to join the sector group or cult
or whatever you want to call it that you're a part of
he's already belongs to my
the only person I answer to is God and I don't believe in gatherings
of people for church
and you gotta pay them part of your salary
well no here's the thing man
they take shackles
they will take shackles
a lot of shackles
but
gathering for church isn't a bad thing
it just depends if it's the right church or not
and if it's going on
I don't want to listen to some dude to interpret
what the Bible says with his own sermon
why do you think you can interpret it better?
huh?
you think you can interpret it better?
I never said that where did you get that from?
I'm asking why would you not want to hear it then
because I don't need to hear his interpretation of what it is
it's in the Bible
why did you have to give me a break down?
yeah exactly
and then he wait a second
and then you know what Larry
and then when they start passing the baskets
that's when I'm like oh man
well how about this man
they don't even do that at the church I go to
and it's good
but they still send them money though
people do but here's the thing
they don't ask for the shackles
in your face and put you on the spot
I'll tell you what
they just hit you up at the door
because my uncle used to be an altar boy
and those shackles didn't make it to the church
I was an altar boy
well my uncle used to
he had shackles from the basket
I don't think I ever robbed from the baskets
oh my uncle did
what kind of an altar boy were you?
what kind of altar boy
the one that didn't get touched
that's what kind of altar boy I was
and that's a WV
because I was a chubby little kid man
I probably was
you were in the fat boy at that time
they had needles in the back
no they didn't
they didn't have any in the back
it would be a funny story if they did
we got no problems telling you how you
put a little frankincense under my armpits
he was hearing about pickle farms
so he ran back there
he's like you got that pickle
so he ran back there
he's like you got that pickle
that was before he figured the joke out
you guys got pickles back here
they were having their
shit spicy ones
I want garlic
yeah
oh Jesus
oh lordy
alright man
I want to say thank you
to everybody for tuning in
we'll do a song
thank you Jesus
thank you God
thank you
my family
thanks everybody who loves us and listens to us
we really appreciate it because this is really
just a shit show
we just smoke weed and drink and talk on the microphone
probably implicate ourselves to the furthest extent
of law
I want to say sorry to Leonard man
I didn't hear you
Larry
I don't know it's fucking
I was pounding at the back door
we were
doing our thing here
I didn't let him in because we've been having him
on as a guest and we don't want to wear
out our guests but it made me look rude
and I hate when I get put on the spot
this digger was just digging a hole over here
hey man
thank the diamond diggers
I'm fucking care I gotta say it
okay thanks
thanks for getting that out
that's it
yeah that's it
I have to say RIP to a friend I lost this week
yeah
very
close and personal friend
and I don't want to say this person's name but
the lord giveth and the lord taketh
at the most
unopportune times
I must have been doing something very unholy
yeah right it's crazy how shit works
it really is because you know what
it doesn't like
I don't have an unwavering with
my higher power but at the same time it's like why
yeah that's what
honestly those are the times that make you
question things
yeah like I don't question my face
it's just I question why
and that's the hardest question to ask
it's like I sound like a five year old
it is
why do you do this why do you do that
it's hard to understand
even when you still when you get older
yeah it is man
I mean it's one of those things you never get
the way that our culture
looks at death
compared to other countries it's pretty
crazy man you don't know why
you'll never know why it's the way god
works it no I understand that
but that's the problem that's why
it's like why do you do it like this
why one why
you know
watch out
you got a snow shovel
I'm gonna bury you
you're gonna take your money
you're gonna take your life
you're always saying
you're gonna take your wife
have your daughters have your kids
have your hands on the door
because here they come
more more more more more more
you're a people idiot
what is that
what's on the end of it
it's just gay dog
I turn that on
it's a dagger counter for gayness
there's a guy that fits on the
cute and his scale it lights up
real bright and I walk around
but it's only pointing at him all the time
so it's just constantly going off
it's like peak thread
because I'm hot
so it needs a bow
yeah it does it's a little dead
you see when you hit the nose
gay Charles has to take his glasses off
well I couldn't see the fucking thing
yeah because look at those lenses man
it's like limo tint
yeah
same way he wears in crabs
let's take it and stare at dudes
you know what's funny
here's the best part
I'm trying not to be a pervert too much
I already got the sunglasses on
I don't know how you have to try
you just can't do it
so try not to be a creep anymore
I don't want to say any names
but you know who's
sets up right in front of us
like bending over
and doing all this crazy flexing around
well at least I could use avert your gaze
that's all you have to do is just look the other way
but no you choose to stare at the other way
it's kinda hard not to look the other way
well it's really not if you're a pervert it's not
it is
people that aren't perverts have this problem
I couldn't stop staring at this chicks ass
while I'm learning how to fight
and tired not to just want to glance over
and see if you're a pervert
well I mean tired not to want to sniff it
that's the hard part
we just
crawl over and just take a break with it
there was a lot of different angles we were getting
looks at because there was a lot of
you know
a lot of different angles she was doing
things were going on
you sound like a prepubescent boy
things were going on
in your pants Larry where you did not tingly
you know there was a lot
of fucking action on the floor
that's what I'm saying
I mean this isn't
the Chicago Stock Exchange
there's not a lot of action on the floor
it's you and Kiki staring at some ladies ass
that's all it is it's just complete
we're the only two other people in the class
we're stuck
we're watching your technique
but you know what though
let's not get next to like an equal
let's stand behind
well here's the thing we're already doing our thing
and then you know she comes in lay
and just right in front of us
yes that's the thing
you know what total dirt bag mentality
she's doing it on purpose
so we can stare
well the crazy thing is
she could go to another spot
she really could
you know what you need to do check the toilet bowls
because this guy might put a plastic bag in there
and try to catch her essence
he just walks out with a bag of urine
right after she goes in
she goes in but I gotta go to an imagineer
you guys have a fridge
I gotta leave
writes her name on it
hot Mexican chick from Crab
who's getting a marker
Taco Twin Wars
she's not Mexican
oh okay
you guys are just creeps
I mean but whatever when I get
I can't wait to get back in about you
I didn't say I wanted to
commit adultery or anything like that
but you are with your eyes
no I didn't think
you're committing adultery with your eyes
I'm just saying it's hard not to look
I didn't think
and your loins that are all tingling
oh whatever
that's your fucking romance novel
I don't know I can just picture what's going on
you know you're rubbing your meat on the mat
you see it right
like a bad dog
oh you have
he's having a dog rubbing his ass on the mat
he rubs his way
he's an army crumb
Rary what are you doing
alright well
are you finished? yeah man
if anybody's still watching
you guys are the fucking great
really are if you're listening
like follow subscribe tell a friend
tell a friend of me tell your neighbor
tell your mom
yeah please tell your mom
we're gonna do rape jokes next week
okay tell your mom
especially if you're most dirty
and then send us our underwear
only if those are dirty
if you leave their address
zip lock bags only
double pleaded
we don't want to smash them down
I don't want to air in them
I don't want them to come all flat
these are my parameters
for an underwear
we're just giving tips
thank you for tuning in peace
I'm Larry
I'm Kiki
thank you very much