Time to get ready for the Larry and Needle show.
Larry and Needles.
We got Kiki and Mark today.
Larry and Needles show.
Thank you very much.
Hey, I'm Larry.
Welcome to Larry and Needles show.
I'm Needles.
We got Kiki today.
As usual.
And Mark.
Don.
Donnie and Forth.
Welcome to the show for misinformation.
The king of this information.
And if Larry corners you in the broom closet at the manhole from kiss information.
The best guy.
So you're still gonna do it live, huh?
I like doing it live.
Yeah, I would say that we got to do an intro, but I like that.
Yeah, the intro is coming.
It makes me very happy.
Yeah, it's good to do it.
Mellows us out before we do anything.
And everybody has their pre-recorded intro.
I've even recorded pre-recorded intros for other people's podcasts and our own as well.
But that adds a certain little flavor.
It's fine.
Yeah, a little genusic.
You never say.
Well, it's not like it's 10 minutes long, but it is.
It's just, it's perfect.
It's a good intro.
In and out like a sneak thief he is.
Yeah.
You'll admit it out.
No time for the old and out.
Very, very funny.
So how's everybody doing today?
Pretty good.
Don and Forth, thank you for your grace with your presence.
Yeah.
Yeah, you got anything you want to talk about today?
Not yet.
Not yet?
You got to get your riled up first.
I don't know.
That's the way to go.
I mean, it's been a busy week, right?
Since the last time.
Man, for me.
I mean, where should we start?
Oh, RIP to Larry's Cats.
Yes, RIP Sebastian.
He passed away yesterday.
And RIP Baby-O.
She passed away last Thursday.
So two of my cats died within a week.
And I don't know.
I think it's something fishy.
You got to be something.
How old were they?
They were pretty old.
But the way, you know, because I've had many...
They weren't acting like strange or nothing?
Well, at the last days, they should certainly were.
Yeah, crying.
I've never seen a cat die like this though, because I've had many cats.
And it was just horrible because they were suffering like crazy.
I think they had an issue with some kind of...
I don't know what it was.
Well, there was something going on.
I mean...
And cats are pretty smart.
They're not going to eat rat poise in here.
Parasites.
That's right.
They're not like dogs.
They just don't like peanut butter off their way.
Dogs, yeah, exactly.
I'm not talking about anything.
Bullshit.
But a cat won't lick up like saying, antifreeze.
I know.
Yeah, exactly.
They're a little trust cat.
Cats know what's up.
Don't trust them.
Cats are the type of animal that's going to like...
When you're sleeping, it's going to wake you up nice and slowly until you stick your head up
and smack you.
Yeah, yeah.
Cats are...
They're sneaky.
Very sneaky animals.
I don't like them.
It's what they may call a catapult.
Yeah.
Bring to that thing right away.
Launch it right into somebody else's tribe.
They...
Got nine lives.
They have various ways of waking you up.
A lot of different methods.
Well, sit on your chest and sit on your throat is my favorite way.
The funniest thing is when our fat cat, Helena, she walks on my wife and she's pretty heavy,
like 20-something pounds.
And the little feet, you know, all the weight is going down and just these paws and it's
like kind of hurts and it wakes her up, you know.
It's in person.
It's such a small area too.
It's kind of like it's spread out.
Right.
A lot of it on you.
I've seen them wake Mary up.
Very funny.
Various ways.
Yeah.
Just sit there and just whine right in her face while she's sleeping.
Get the heck out of here.
What are you doing, cat?
And sometimes if that doesn't work, what they do is just start knocking stuff off of our
dresser.
Yeah.
The noise here, the better.
To get your attention.
Right.
To feed them, which is very funny.
Pill bottles, chains.
Okay, we're on a schedule.
Well, exactly.
They definitely don't run the house.
The cats do.
It's pretty crazy how they have them under control.
I'm a definite cat custodian.
I don't mind though, man.
I mean, I'm really.
That's how it works.
I love them.
And I loved my other cats.
They just died too.
And it was very traumatic for my wife and as well me, you know, but I had to deal with
everything.
I'm the one that's got to pick up the dead body.
I'm the one, you know.
You know, now I'm thinking about it too.
Like, I don't think poisoning would be in the cards because it's been so damn cold out
here.
Who's even going outside?
Right.
Do anything.
You know, you can still lay on the outside though.
They've been around too long.
And usually.
Right.
Yeah.
Dude during the summer, early during the winter.
Yeah.
Well, it's a lot easier to do that kind of stuff.
Most people are.
Deal with that.
People don't get as bothered by them in the winter.
Right.
Yeah.
They don't care.
Okay.
We're getting closer.
It's coincidence.
Yeah.
It's similar.
And you said it's really bad.
The symptoms are similar.
So RIP to Larry's cats.
Too bad you could bury them in the back.
It's about when it warms up I am going to bury their ashes.
You bury it in the back of the cemetery.
And I'm going to bury Tom.
Rather have them back here.
You bury Tom.
Sarah's going to give me Tom's ashes.
He's going to come back as a half cat half man.
What's that?
That's thinking a little nice.
It's all right.
But I still love you.
Spin it.
He's a spinner.
Larry, I'm a cat, stupid cat.
I found out why my father got cremated.
Yes, Mark's father passed away as well.
That was a week and a half ago.
Anyways, he was a fisherman.
Okay, let's hear it.
He was a cremated, cause worms.
He hooked so many worms.
He was afraid they were gonna come back.
They were gonna get him.
Oh, okay, they were gonna use his body as soon as possible.
He was probably right.
I mean, that does happen.
That makes perfect sense.
The degradation of the wood, stuff gets in there.
Mark's dad was a huge, big, tough guy.
And he was the first person I ever heard
of getting tattoos removed.
Really?
Yeah, yeah.
What kind of tattoos?
All kinds.
Yeah, all kinds of tattoos.
Good tattoos.
He was like a comic book.
I literally tried to read them.
They were probably old school too.
Mickey Mouse and the trans-Sailor Jerry stuff.
Yes.
Just like an anchor.
Yeah, a tattoo.
Mom.
Yeah, mom.
Clothing, old school, yeah.
Something that meant something.
The sailors would go to ports and they would get a tattoo.
And venereal disease.
The naked lady when they move the arms, dances.
They'd get a tattoo and some kind of venereal disease
at every port.
Yeah.
Well, that's what a venereal is.
I mean, like you get the clap, we're gonna read it.
It's like the origin story of it.
It's just all these people coming to port.
Hey, man.
I love you long time.
Sailors.
Oh yeah, like we think.
That's where the saying comes from.
It didn't get invented in Boys Town.
Hey, Sailor.
Yeah.
Dude, I have a buddy in the Navy go to Australia
and the chicks, right?
When they would pull up.
Right there.
The chicks would put their names and numbers on tennis balls.
Oh my Lord.
It starts throwing them into the ship.
So yeah.
Wow.
And then there's even a directory the guys,
sailors can go to where women interest in dates.
You can just go.
Oh my Lord.
I mean, this was dates.
This was a long time.
This was 20 something years ago.
Now it's a thousand times easier.
Now it's all done online.
Yeah.
Well, Australian women always love the Americans.
American women, Americans treat their women good.
Yeah.
Compared to Australia.
This is a prisoner country.
Yeah.
The genre kind of.
Bluff lines there.
I can see that.
All my buddies, even in the military going to Australia,
they said they never had to buy a drink.
The Australians.
Love them.
Oh, everybody loved them out there.
They're like, they can never pay for their own drink.
No, they have a soul.
No matter where they went, man.
That's so odd.
Cause I'm used to traveling around and everywhere you go,
they hate Americans.
They hate us.
Well, it's not because of you.
Not because of me personally, but they just don't like.
It's because they read in the news.
Well, yeah, America.
Yeah, exactly.
That's it.
As soon as they hear your accent, they're like, okay.
What did you see when, what's his name?
Sasha Barakone.
Went to West Bank on the wall and he went like dressed as a gay dude.
And he's like, that was the first time he had to break out of character.
And he got his butt kicked.
I mean, he got two black eyes.
He said they couldn't film for two weeks because he had to let.
Just like the guy we were talking about.
And I was like, what do you think is going to happen?
And honestly, it should happen.
Mess around and find out.
Gonna mess around.
I apologize.
I'm gonna do the mess around.
But you know what I mean?
Like, why would you go antagonize people like that?
People are so comfortable doing that nowadays.
And then you get punched in the face and like, oh my gosh, I got a surprise.
I'm suing you.
Yeah.
And that's the problem.
Everybody's suing everybody now.
You cannot.
Well.
I don't even know where to start.
Do we just start at the World Economic Forum and work our way down to the degradation of
society?
There's no better time to tell you guys.
Well, here's the thing about...
I'm suing the Larry Niels podcast.
Yeah.
Right.
Well, think I'm a lawyer.
Here's the thing about Borat, you know, Sacha Berrigan Cohen.
What goes around and does these things all over the place?
And people when they find out or either they don't find out or when they figure it out,
they don't physically kick his ass.
Well.
I mean, this is the Holy of Holiest.
He excites the big thing.
He's trying to get a rise out of people.
I don't know if he was dressed in like his like Unitard thing or whatever.
He didn't pick people up.
He didn't know that that was going to happen.
Yeah.
I mean, these guys are serious hardcore.
They pray eight hours a day.
You know, for the Boys Town where you'll be fine, you're not going to get everybody's
going to be like, hey, this is normal.
But they're not that accepting of it.
No.
I know.
No, no, no.
They're the least of accepting.
These guys are not.
Man, I don't want to.
They barely accept anybody outside of the race.
Right.
Well, Dave's, I mean, was that Crown Heights?
That Crown Heights riot when those two kids got hit by the car?
One was African American.
One was Jewish.
And the Jewish Indians came and picked up.
Only the.
Only the Jewish kids.
Really?
Yeah.
They have their own ambulance.
They have like their own entrance.
I mean, these guys, they're tight.
They take care of their own.
You don't matter if they're not part of the.
That's kind of crazy.
And then they have a.
They do.
Oh, I don't know what the ambulance.
Yeah.
Were they like no Schwartz's in this ambulance?
Well, yeah, I mean.
And you in New York is the most diverse state in the United States.
Geez.
How many people live there?
10 million maybe now.
More or more.
I think I think Chicago has like 10 million.
No, no, no.
Chicago has like about three and a half million or something.
That's it.
But in Chicago.
Yeah, it's around in the area.
San Diego had like three million, I think.
Yeah.
It's not as tight as.
But yeah, there's a lot of people.
Six million is a lot when you think about like some states have.
Just in that small area.
Five or eight million population whole state.
And the crazy thing about that ambulance thing, the Jewish people are what, 1% of the population.
But they.
There's not that many of them.
Well, here's the thing, man.
They look out for their own.
They were forced to.
After the Holocaust, they stick together.
Oh, yeah.
That's what I'm saying.
They were given.
I think they always did.
Yeah.
I think they always did.
Well, none to do with the Holocaust.
Right.
That was well, but I'm sure that made it a little bit more solidified of a union between
the people, right?
Crazy.
You know, you told you all along.
I don't know.
Crazy thing about the Jews.
There's black, Russian.
I mean, every single mark grew up Jewish.
I thought I was Jewish when I was younger.
He thought you were.
You were.
No, I thought I was.
I thought it was Jewish.
I thought it was Jewish, so it kind of made me Jewish.
Kind of mean.
I went to Jewish school with the Torah.
Yeah.
Oh, yeah.
Yeah.
I'm asking you want to tell them what happened to Jewish tell them what happened.
Well, I could just the the the my name mark is Jewish, you know, it's a Hebrew name.
And I'm just a little kid.
I don't know much more than this, you know, and somebody asked me something.
I'm Hebrew.
It was a neighbor who was Jewish, swish lows.
And so Saturday morning comes and they throw me in their car and take me to the little Jewish
place with their kids.
Yeah.
And they drop us off and we go in and do the thing.
I mean, how long did you go there?
Years.
Just because they thought you were Jewish.
Yes, for a long time.
And then they looked when you went to the bathroom one time like, oh, you're not cut.
No, no, no.
No, that's not.
Sunday when he's flipping lights, which is one of the videos you know, yeah, I was Jewish.
I'm just kidding.
Yeah.
Christmas.
And so I wonder how come they're not talking about baby Jesus and you know, I get all these
presents, what's this eight days of prayer, what's going on.
And they finally figured it out from that.
I still didn't realize what was going on.
Yeah.
I don't know why I couldn't go there anymore.
I didn't know.
I still didn't know why.
Yeah.
Well, you're young.
You're young.
I wonder.
I guess he must have been one of the ugly kids.
No, what do you think about two when you're younger?
Pass.
I saw no tunnels.
Dude, the tunnels are awesome.
No, I'm kidding.
That's a joke.
It is younger than me though.
That was the line that I've been down there.
Gaza tunnels and is you know, there's tunnels everywhere.
Well, yeah.
How about we have Rome?
We have tunnels in Chicago like crazy.
Not only that.
The deep tunnel project just for water overflow, so they tell us.
Yeah.
My buddy, my dad's friend.
That's where the migrants are sleeping right now.
Where's that?
The tunnels.
They have tunnel people in Vegas.
You ever see that?
Yeah.
Oh yeah.
They're like the more people in Vegas.
Which I mean, far and then it rains every once in a while.
And they can get killed.
And then some of them drown.
And then the Gators get them.
Tunnel Gators.
They're like zombies.
They come out at night.
I went to Vegas and you don't see them until nighttime.
And there's homeless everywhere.
Where's that?
At night in Vegas.
Oh yeah.
It's like zombies.
And like the past five years, everywhere you go now at night, yeah, it's every place
is just like, what's going on?
People will tell you there's no, the crime is fine right now.
Everything is good.
People will look you in the face and be like, everything's okay right now.
Well, here's the reason they're out at night.
One of the reasons.
Oh boy.
It's safer for them to sleep in the day.
Yeah.
Because at night it's more dangerous.
Some people come up and kill bombs just for no reason.
Shoot them, gangbangers, or someone just beats them or something.
Yeah, sleep someplace in public.
So they gotta stay alert at night.
Because that's when the crazies come out.
During the day it's normal people like us who is not going to hurt a random person.
Exactly.
Good point.
That's one of the reasons.
Well, the odds of being randomly attacked lately are skyrocketed.
I got randomly attacked.
Yeah, how about that?
It wasn't even almost on the streets.
I know.
You know what I mean by that.
Yes, but I got attacked recently.
Yeah, you want to talk about that because you gotta get it off your chest.
Well, you know, I really don't, but I don't want to give him any credence.
I don't want to give that guy any credence because I'm over it because I realize that
like what we were talking about before Kiki, you know, I can't hold on to that stuff.
Not only that, I wrote that little mini punk rock opera.
Which was fantastic.
Thank you.
Very good.
And that made me feel great.
When I was finished with that, I wasn't mad at him anymore.
So I don't even want to give him any credence.
I just want to let him know that that was a real bitch move.
And you know, and I'm gonna have nothing but venom for you the rest of my life.
But you know who you are, but everybody else, I love you and I love you guys too.
I love doing this.
Yeah.
Talking about love.
And Larry did all those in one take too, which I was blown away.
I'm like, wait a minute, you just did all that in one take.
Like I was blown away like, holy.
Very good.
So listen to this.
You guys know who Joe Olstein is?
Yes.
The preacher.
The guy I watch every Sunday.
That's a false prophet.
No, you don't.
The guy who sent $100 to every week.
You're supposed to send 2000.
Well, I was gonna say, have you been touched by Jesus?
Get out naughty way.
I've been touched by Joe Olstein.
Yes, you have in your wallet.
In the green room.
Yeah.
In the green room.
So, Joe.
Tearful Joe Olstein announces Lakewood Church paid off a hundred million dollar bank of America loan.
Oh boy, next creation.
For what?
A hundred million.
So the property is in Lakewood Church.
So, he bought a hundred million dollars to build this mega church.
Wow.
And they finally paid it off.
How many years did it take?
With tax free donations.
I can go into it.
Well, there it is.
Do you ever see this guy's mega mansion?
Oh, yeah.
Oh man.
He's a real skate foods, let me tell you.
They make night one truck.
Some how.
As far as they can throw it.
Yeah, it's amazing they can hoodwink their people into thinking that, you know, I gotta
have a Rolls Royce, you know, and I need the helicopter.
And of course the private jet.
Yeah.
The private jet, plural.
20 years.
Not just one.
The place my wife wants to go somewhere different.
You know, the crazy thing is, you know, when Jesus walked his earth, you think he was
walking in alligator skins and everything?
No.
Like this is what blows my mind how people think this is real.
He had sleeves on his feet tied to him.
I tell you, walk down and walk his earth.
And just to say, it's like, yeah, this is what people think it's supposed to be.
It's very disturbing.
And then what, did you see when it flooded down there?
Like he wouldn't, he refused to open the doors to his place to help people out until
it was on the news.
Then he's like, oh, yes, we're here to help everybody.
Yeah, listen to that.
Very Christian like.
Yeah.
I mean, yeah.
And that's, and that's another reason like what you said to me, needles in that text
the other day when I was telling you what happened, you said that's very Christian of
you Larry.
And I thought, man, I sound like a devil and, and that's another reason I don't want to
get into what happened with the attack.
It's just bogus.
No, I'm not going to name him.
I'm just not mad.
I just want to reiterate that I'm actually over it.
Yeah.
You're not animosity.
I don't.
That means why would you hold a grudge?
Yeah.
You're not, you're not like somebody that's upset with themselves.
You're not going to let them ruin your day.
Exactly.
Well, at one point the problem, man, okay, I don't even want to get into this.
Now we're starting to get into it.
We're good.
We're going to do one guess the race.
Okay.
One, you can't do a teaser.
Maybe two.
Yeah.
We got a new player here.
Oh, he, I think he's already, he might have already played this.
You ever play guess the race?
What's guess the race?
Guess the race.
Oh, guess the race.
Yes.
So I read a case and you guess the race of the person that committed the crime.
Oh, okay.
Sure.
I can play that.
So New Mexico man allegedly runs over, kills girlfriend's husband during fight
at dog park.
New Mexican, New Mexico man allegedly runs over, kills girlfriend's husband during fight
at dog park.
So he allegedly ran this guy over and killed him at dog park.
New Mexico dog park.
She was girlfriend's husband.
Yes.
So she was cheating on him.
They sound like that.
I'm assuming the guy confronts him.
Yeah.
Right.
I know.
I got a good guess.
I'm going to say just for white folk.
You're an Indian.
Okay.
This is the thing though.
You talk these things out.
That's pretty bad man.
New Mexico.
I'm saying New Mexico.
You got to know your geography.
You want to know the reason why I guessed that?
Why is that?
When I moved out to California 20 years ago or whatever.
An Indian tried to run you over.
They let you use your crap.
You used your cup out and the guy had one tear coming out.
We stopped in New Mexico to get some food and it was on a Sunday.
We were like, you know what, we're going to watch some football, have some drinks and
whatever before we go back.
So we go to just some like at Fridays or some kind of chain restaurants.
And we go to order drinks.
They're like, no, yeah, we're dry.
We don't serve drinks.
Firewater will get you.
Yeah.
Like what are you talking about?
Well, like the American Indian population.
With the reservations around New York.
They got so bad where they were just roaming the streets.
I mean they were terrorizing cars.
They're passing out.
They had an enzyme right there.
I saw that when I was a little kid.
My dad took us there.
They have an enzyme that or they were missing an enzyme.
Well, it's like certain Asians are the same way that you can't drink alcohol.
Yeah, they're face is on red.
Yeah, they just can't take it.
All right.
So yeah, they learned to love it.
You've diverted me with your reservation story.
Well, I was giving you my thought.
Oh, like, you know what?
He was drunk and all pissed off.
Yeah, here's a nickel that's been wasting my time.
No, no.
Kiki.
Instead of kicking the dog, he took it out on the husband.
That was worth it.
No way.
I didn't guess.
I'm going to read it again.
You're rushing through the only one you have today.
I'm not rushing through.
I want you guys to read it again.
If I let you go, you're going to start talking about spaces and real and you saw a crypt
in the other eight.
Well, if we're going to get into that, no.
And shout out to the Saigon whore that bit Kiki's nose.
Yeah, it's healing.
It's healing.
But he got an infection.
Yeah, whatever.
Whatever you chew it on before you bit my nose.
Probably a bat or some sort of snake.
Some creature that came in a cage.
Whatever street food you were eating.
All right.
So, guess.
Oh, no, you got to read it.
I thought you got to read it again for Larry.
Well, I'm going to say black just to keep consistent with last time.
I think I guess black everyone.
It was wrong.
It was right at one of them.
Probably the best odds there.
All right.
New Mexico man allegedly runs over.
Get the hell out of here.
What are you doing?
Trying to cheat the man.
You son of a bitch.
I'm going to slap you in the chops.
I just want to see what the man looks like.
Yeah, you're cheating.
I'm cheating.
No cheating.
No.
Runs over and kills girlfriend's husband during fight at dog park.
What'd you say?
Yeah.
American.
That could be anybody.
Caucasian.
Native American.
Larry wins.
Woo.
Just because there's no rhyme or reason, but I thought that was a very funny story.
Yeah, that could have been anybody.
Yeah, you got the best out of that.
I mean, imagine being at a dog park and you get caught cheating.
I mean, that's not one plate in your African American.
I thought I was going to lose that one.
Because you know, New Mexico, I had some of the best Mexican food of my life in Albuquerque,
New Mexico when I was a kid and we're on a family vacation.
I bet.
Yeah.
It was like the real deal.
It wasn't at Fridays.
Yeah.
I know you.
Yeah.
It was like 1978 or something.
Yeah.
Like here, let's go here and it was some, you know, off the beaten path shack and I'm
like, wow.
Those are the good ones.
Yeah.
The opposite of Fridays.
Yeah, it was awesome.
It was really good.
You would have loved to need those.
I will tell you what, I had my most expensive Mexican meal I've ever had and what the hell
was I just had?
Sedona.
$1,000?
No, is this story even true to you?
No, he's making it up.
So, you know, it had some good reviews and the pictures look great.
You know, it's a don't I forget the name of the place, but it costs like $37.
You know, it's a high good place.
Well, we went in there and you know, specialized in tamales.
So we get a tamale, really fancy.
Mali in a room for $37.
I mean, they made the tamales to order and it was four old Mexican women and she said
it was all her like grandma's special recipe.
She made some order.
Oh, I mean, how many orders can you order?
Well, they could have the tamale ready to go.
Oh, all you make it there as you order.
I see.
I thought you were saying I want one with fish in there.
No.
I was going to say.
Fish tamale.
Yeah.
That's a weird one.
But you don't want to mess with it.
I'm just saying the one thing you pull out of all the food.
Right.
You can't change the traditional thing and then expect it to be all right.
No, I'm going to say chicken tamale.
I had a chicken tamale, but even the presentation was just fantastic.
Every bite was really, I mean, it was $36.
Well, the $36, I mean, me and my wife.
Well, I got a thing of chips, a small thing of chips, which were homemade and horchata.
But I mean, it was fantastic, but that is a lot for a tamale, a thing of chips.
Okay.
How about this?
Because just one tamale.
Like I did your 25.
Yeah.
No.
And then it was a size of an enchilada.
But yeah, it was a jumbo tamale.
Yeah.
He's still chubby.
But still, honestly, everything in Sedona was expensive.
Yes.
Sedona.
Payne Devere.
Sedona.
I don't know.
A lot of things were painted out there.
I don't know.
It's Arizona.
Yeah.
It's a couple hours north of Scottsdale.
My buddy lives in Scottsdale.
Russ lives in Phoenix and he's like, yeah, go to the, we're going to go to the Safeway.
You know, he was right in downtown Phoenix.
I walked to the grocery store and there was a fight in the grocery store between this
black guy and the Mexican guy that works there.
And now they're Vistakuffs and the guy, they're screaming at each other.
And I run to the back of the store.
I'm like, someone's going to get shot.
And I'm like, and then nothing happened.
And I'm like, man, in Chicago, there would have been, there would have been a dead mother.
Desert people are a different breed.
It was weird, man.
Completely different.
I was like, wow, there's going to be a shooting right now.
And I ran to the back.
They just think a lot of people can kill each other.
Oh, you know, I asked my buddy too, because I'm like, you know, there's cats in the mountains
and rattlesnakes.
I'm like, you got your gun on you?
He's like, no.
I'm like, you don't need to conceal carry out here.
Do you?
He's like, no, you can conceal nothing.
He's like, yeah, let's stay changed to laws.
No, you can.
Everybody's can carry out here.
Everybody.
But let me correct my last story.
The guard was the black guy.
And he was a big, he's still fighting a Hispanic guy.
Yeah.
But he choked this guy out and the guys like, and he like got his ego bruised.
And I'm like, he got out of there.
He didn't come out and shoot.
And I'm like, that guy's coming back.
I'm getting, you know, there's going to be a shooting in Chicago.
There's going to be some, some chalk out lines.
Seriously, they don't nothing happened.
How about the New York era?
What do you call it?
Chicago's mayor saying that there's going to be a ceasefire in Gaza.
And did you see everybody's like, where are you talking about?
Yes.
How about a ceasefire in Chicago?
I'm not saying to change subjects.
How about you take care of where you know, where you should end to eat?
They're trying to deflect, you know, right?
It's not even about.
He's virtue signaling is what he's doing.
I'm, I'm a lib.
I'm great.
Here I am.
I really care about Gaza.
Why would you even write that though?
He's doing it.
He's virtue signaling.
It's like, but what inside of you makes you look out your window and get into your armed
guards with your car and go to work and you're so scared that you have to have a convoy.
But it could possibly be some old kid that works for him, that works his social media
or Twitter and then and he's, they read it.
Yeah, whatever.
That sounds good.
And he doesn't realize how bad it's going to be.
I mean, could possibly be the state.
No, it could be because Biden's press secretary, she did a thing.
She, that's what happened.
That's how these guys were.
Did you see what she did?
She made a post as she was the president from her account instead of Biden's account.
So it was like, oh, was Biden borrowing your phone?
Yeah, exactly.
So, you know, you know, they write all that stuff.
Anyways, the president doesn't have time.
Well, he can't put two words together.
How about the new words that he was saying?
Yeah, what was that?
I'm gonna have Don in for the next episode.
I saw that.
I didn't even, I just got shook my head and slipped to the thing.
You know, if you for free, and then I'm gonna run around.
He gets a couple things, right?
But at the same time, he gets a couple things.
What are the couple things he gets right?
Well, no, here, did you see the videos from like 20, 30 years ago of Biden?
No, we don't want to talk about this.
It's like crime bill.
It's a different guy.
Yeah, it's a different guy.
He was even talking about the sanctuary cities.
He's like, well, we know by testing this out, it turns cities into dumps.
Well, one place did it.
Yeah, well, he's like, we know this, and this is why we don't worry about it.
We have a piece of crack flurry.
Totally flip-flopped.
Very adamant about it.
Piece of crack cocaine this big.
Size of a quarter.
Mandatory minimum.
Life's reasonable.
And around it's son is.
How crazy.
It was crazy, though, right?
We talked about cryptic.
Here's the thing about this, though.
They showed a shot last night on TV.
Mary was watching some stuff.
They showed Biden saying some stuff.
Today.
So you like the TV, right?
And then they showed him back in...
Good TV.
And then they showed him back in 2007 where he's totally against what he's saying now.
But if you look at the guy, different mouth, different ears, different skull shape, it
ain't the same guy.
Well, he is like, nice.
He cannot be the same guy.
It's been four years.
They have destroyed this country, which is crazy.
From every aspect and every angle.
We said he was going to do it.
Check it out, though.
You guys heard the video recording of Kerry Lake with the library.
The Republican Party in Arizona.
Kerry Lake is awesome.
Yeah.
And it's like, okay, this guy's like, well, we'll give you all this money.
We'll give you a push job at some big company making.
Not to run for two years.
It's like, okay, why do you why two years?
Nikki Haley.
What are they trying to do in the next two years?
They're like, well, we don't care what you do in two years.
Like, what do they want to try to do in the next three years?
And then she's like, I don't care.
A million, two million, five million, a billion.
You can't buy me.
And then the guy says to her, name your price.
Well, yeah.
At least come back with an offer.
Give me something.
It's like, oh, man.
Oh, shit.
I can't tell you who it is, but the people are real high up in the heart.
Real high up.
They're all high.
They are.
It was interesting.
I'll tell you what, there's nothing hotter than that.
And she's pretty hot.
Oh, dude.
She's pretty hot.
And it's just like a strong woman.
You know what?
At my age, the range and the eyesight, everything just, the eyesight deteriorates and your range
opens up like crazy.
You'll see.
It gets better.
The beer goggles on all the time.
You don't even need to have a drink.
Every interview I've heard with Kerry Lake, I love her.
Me too.
You and then you hear like Nikki Haley.
She's real.
She is just a birdbrain.
Oh, well, even like Vivek was saying, he's like Nikki Haley was broke.
Lucas can be all of a sudden, she gets voted into this or that.
Now she's on the board of this.
She's a warm auger and she's got millions of dollars.
And she just sits there like all dumbfounded.
And then she's gone.
How about her claiming victory?
Well, how about her claiming she got teased as a child for being brown?
And I'm like, I mean, when they said she was an Indian, I thought they meant American Indian.
I had no clue she was an Indian.
And then all of a sudden it's East Indian.
I'm like, man, she's whiter than me.
Yeah.
She can't even tell if she is an Indian.
I'm sure they didn't make fun of her at school because of her color.
They just thought it pretty easy.
They don't get made fun of.
I wanted to bang when I thought she was white.
I guess they do.
I still want to bang her.
I thought you think she's Indian.
I mean, I think my first girlfriend was Indian.
You think?
But she didn't admit it because it wasn't cool back then in the 70s.
And she was hotter than hell, man.
She was really fucking Indian.
I went to buddy in high school.
He was.
And I thought her dad was Mexican because I was a dumb kid.
But thinking back, he was Indian.
Yeah.
I don't think about that.
Why did buddy in high school, he was Syrian and he would tell everyone, no, I'm Italian.
I'm Italian just because you know, you know, sure.
You don't want to get made fun of.
Yeah.
Right.
Yeah.
Or just be cool.
Yeah.
Like the reason back in the 50s, like he was a great guy.
Like today Polish people speak Polish, Italian people speak Italian, all this stuff.
Back in the 50s, they didn't want to associate with that.
They all spoke English and then their children didn't know how to speak Greek or German.
Oh no, that's my parents.
So we have.
Change your names at Ellis Island.
And now it's okay again.
Now it's cool.
So my grandparents came over in the early 1900s and like that's the thing.
My grandfather, because my mom wanted to speak Italian and my grandfather's like, no, we're
American now.
We speak, you speak English here.
Same with my Polish family.
They're like, no, you're Polish.
You speak English.
They wanted to assimilate.
Oh yeah.
Well, that's the thing.
They put pride into it too.
Yeah.
Freshest America.
Yeah.
And that's what you had to do.
That's it can speak Spanish, Polish, Polish, Italian.
Everybody speaks English.
I mean, you think about it now.
It's like it would have been great to learn all the stuff.
I should if I can speak Polish and Italian.
They had it going on better racially back then than they do now.
Now we are more segregated.
Yeah.
People were proud to be American.
Right.
That's the one thing we've lost is pride in this country.
I love this country, but I hate that people are running it.
They're running it right into the ground.
Well, that's how you lost the pride in it because all the Chinese shit and I get the
cheap products.
Everyone's pissed.
I lost their jobs.
Country sucks because all the jobs went to China.
I lost my job.
You know what I mean?
They did it on purpose.
They did it.
And the other thing is they give everyone a trophy syndrome.
Media acuity is okay.
So they don't want people to really stand out.
Well, you don't want to strive for the top anymore.
If you stand out, that's white supremacy.
That's right.
Teenagers are better than anybody.
Everybody's equal, which is all this communist BS.
It's just exactly the opposite of like, say, and the worst is the internet, which we always
talk about, which people stare at their phones.
Yes, the stuff that they're and they're spitting today is Marxism right out of the Karl Marx
book.
Yeah.
What Martin Luther King was saying is what should be going on.
No, he was no judge people by their fucking hands.
Yeah.
Your character, either a character or values, yes, values.
There's good and bad of everybody, you know, are you good or you evil?
Right.
I was in the other one.
Oh, Malcolm X.
Malcolm X.
You look at these people, these high ranking politicians and some of these people have
been named in a little black book.
Yes.
And they still go out there with this bravado.
Yes.
Narcissist.
They have to act like nothing ever happened.
Yeah.
Exactly.
It's crazy how they carry themselves.
That's absurd.
Mr. Clinton was on this list how many times?
Over 50.
And it's like, what are you doing down there?
You're not going down there to play Yachty.
You know the crazy thing is, everybody you talk about about Bill Clinton, they're like,
you know, I love Bill.
He's a great, fun guy.
But they're like, Hillary on the other hand.
Everybody loves Bill.
He's just a fun time child.
Don't badmouth Hillary.
We don't want anyone to commit suicide.
Some of these grocery lists.
I don't know.
I don't know what he's doing.
Some of these grocery lists.
I don't know.
I hate myself.
But that's the problem though.
It's like, the funny thing is, when you say it when Trump showed his hand and they're
like, it's syphilis.
Oh, of course.
Yeah, like you mess up.
People can just say anything they're doing.
He was so mad he slammed his hand down and yeah.
You know what it was?
It was like a golfing glove.
What's that?
Some guy, Mary, you know, on her little Patreon website, it's one guy who writes, he's like,
I golfed, that's where the holes are in the glove.
Oh, really?
Just me?
Yeah, the guy's golfing his ass off.
Yeah.
Oh, he's got any larger hands?
I've been listed from the driver and stuff.
Oh yeah, because yeah, the red, because they had a little couple holes on it.
Yeah.
They were making it and then they showed them.
And they act like he's going to die.
Were they like, wiping his hand?
Yeah.
You're serious?
They do all this stuff like nothing.
Well, that's real anymore.
That's what they did with Joe Rowland when he said he took the horse dewormer.
I've read that in.
Yeah, they made his, they were.
I should have said that.
You guys see that picture?
Yeah, they made his face like all the skin, all yellow and stuff like, oh, look at him.
He looks horrible.
People can do that.
Oh yeah.
Did you see that stuff about the, something created in a picture?
Taylor Swift, AI, huge and stuff like this.
Not nude.
Well, yeah.
Okay, I didn't want to go that far.
Well, we're not.
Are you sure?
Not really, Taylor?
They are not.
They're not.
So you just remember?
I think it's really mind that she would do something as dumb as that.
You never know.
Yeah, she's, she's.
Everyone's the biggest pop star in the world.
Taylor Swift is our foodie.
She's got a lot to lose.
It's not like, she has people surrounding her 24 seven.
Like if she's about to do something dumb, they're not going to allow.
We've talked about these deep fakes where these guys get AI for anything like that.
Not Taylor.
Yeah.
Maybe she was, but they're not going to let nobody film it.
I'll tell you what, I'm not saying she don't get down.
I would like to.
I like the porn.
The whole thing is also that they can make deep fakes.
You know what I mean?
Like the funny thing is, yeah, that's true.
Like all the ones with me out there, that's all deep fake.
I didn't do any of that.
Highland, Hitler and zoom, crazy stuff.
I remember the tourist guy you're talking about, the tourist fellow.
He took the one picture of himself in a building and then after 9 11, he superimposed a plane
coming like, he's on the top of the building waving.
So I put a plane.
Since then now, people have taken them and put them in front of every disaster.
Oh, the photo shop.
Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.
You see, you're going to take Tannock.
You see, you're going to take the Hibbler movie.
That was the thing now.
And they do Superman flying.
Like a flat Stanley, sort of thing.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
I get it.
Yeah.
I like that.
I'm very excited for tomorrow night.
What's tomorrow?
Oh, what's tomorrow?
Go to see Sam Tripoli.
Oh, is it tomorrow?
Yes.
Oh, and also.
What time?
I was supposed to go get some dinner with him.
I told you this last week.
What's going on?
It's a week ago.
You told me you think I'm going to remember that.
You should.
Son of a, who are you going to see?
Speaking of gigs, though, let me just say that.
I'm pumped.
That spirit of 77 gig that I was talking about on February 10th.
Anybody that heard his previous episode that I said to show up, that gig got canceled.
It did.
A couple.
Why?
Because of COVID.
No, they didn't.
Where are you guys going tomorrow night?
We'll get the Surveys as sick as that.
We're going to go see this comedian, Sam Tripoli.
Well, he is a bad.
He, I told you about it.
Bad as broadcast.
I said, hey, Mark, we need to go see a comedian with a bunch of his friends.
I'm sure you won't want to go.
You think we should get your ticket?
You're like, you know me.
I don't even.
It's good.
Oh, wait, so where's it at?
I did.
Batavia.
I'm not going to be able to sleep at 9 30.
That's, that's what you told me.
And that's why I didn't get a ticket because how much, you know, how much of the tickets
like 40, 50 bucks?
Not even.
It was 30.
It's going to be, it's going to be awesome.
I didn't think you want to pay 30 bucks in it.
Well, is it sold out?
We'll be able to go.
I have to look at the podcast.
I'll find out.
I'll be sleeping.
Because like if you didn't have tickets for the midget wrestling, you wouldn't have been
able to walk in.
Oh, yeah.
I don't know about that.
Well, yeah, they probably would have taken money.
Yeah.
They're like, we don't care if we overpack this place.
Yeah.
He's like, you see, he's going to leave early anyway.
You're like trying to show him.
Get a wrestling belt to wear.
Yeah.
And we'll see.
Topics are funny.
And that was a funny stuff.
Well, I don't know if is it, is it going to be like a, is he going to do a podcast or
is he going to do like a podcast?
Who's stand up?
He's a guy who does conspiracy theories.
Oh.
He's a well-known show.
Yeah.
He's very like-minded.
Yeah.
So, you know what?
I listened, needles told me to listen to it and I thought, what is he known stuff?
But I gave it a shot and I actually got sucked into it and then let's do another one.
It was actually really good.
Maybe you should start a podcast of what does he know?
Well, I'll tell you, I like him because he had my guy, he had my man, George Weisman
on there, but the hydrogen water machine, which I have.
Brown's gas.
Yeah.
Brown's gas.
Yeah.
I swear by that machine.
I love it.
You don't throw it in your car?
No, I have my house.
It's a big machine.
But yeah, it makes hydrogen water.
Hydrogen hydrogen water.
I've been doing it for like a year.
I love it.
So, no, it pumps hydrogen bubbles into the water.
It infuses it.
It turns, it takes distilled water and it turns the water with-
It puts more hydrogen in it than normal.
No, it turns it into a low percentage of hydrogen.
High percentage hydrogen, you know, it's flammable.
It can explode.
He's like an old school vacuum sailor.
Vacuum salesman just shows up.
So, when you spontaneously combust, we'll know why.
Yeah, exactly.
But no, but it's like, it's like two, three percent, I believe hydrogen.
Wow.
It bubbles the distilled water.
It's fantastic.
It's kind of weird to say, but-
Is it like sparkly bubbly water, mineral water?
No.
No, no.
But it's-
Zero problem, no carbonation.
Zero PPM whatsoever and it, but it's hard, it's weird to say this, but it tastes wetter
than regular water.
Wow.
But it's, I love it.
I love it.
I've been to a girl like that.
Yeah, I drink it every, all day, every day.
Did you see this advice they got in the car now that does this thing about the hydrogen?
It sounds similar to what you had actually.
It's in a car.
What is it?
And they're supposed to get better mileage.
Yes, yes, yes, yes.
Some type of hydrogen thing they put in the car now.
I've seen this.
I think Toyota is actually big in the time.
I've seen this other thing where they said, here's this piece.
It's simple plug-in piece.
They don't want anybody to find out about it.
The computer run?
And this thing, you'll get twice the gas mileage.
The cars are rigged to, well no, no, this is an extra aftermarket thing.
They're saying the car manufacturers are designing the motors to suck more gas than
it's necessary.
Well, yeah, it's all about spending money on the gas.
I bought one.
I mean, I plugged it in and it kept blinking green and nothing tells me what to do.
Did you ever see that Delorean documentary movie?
Yeah, I saw it.
The best of the cases are below.
Oh, that's part of it too.
I spent it a couple minutes ago.
I got one for 50 bucks.
What's that?
One of the most expensive guests, the plug-in of your computer, it says.
He was talking about it.
A tube in a bucket?
Why are you doing that?
Why are you...
I plugged it in and it got out of their cars and it's in the gas.
The light is just blinking, blinking, blinking, blinking.
Okay, well, what did it come with any instructions?
No, it didn't come with any instructions.
I'm sure that's all you gotta do, man.
It's gonna blink.
It looks so green when I drive along at night.
There's a green blink button.
Have you noticed like if you fill up your tank, you get more gas mileage?
No, I didn't notice that.
The computer doesn't plug in.
So they're distracting you.
Right by the computer thing, when you plug in to test the car, like...
Underneath your steering wheel.
Yeah, what is that called?
It's that bright.
It's a tape for the car.
It's a T1.
Why don't you put some tape over it?
Yeah, well, like I said, they tried it.
I drove around for a couple of weeks or two with it.
Don't touch Kiki.
And I didn't see any difference in the mileage, is the thing.
I saw no difference in the mileage.
So you think it's farcical?
Yeah, I don't...
Actually, no, no, no.
I mean, so you just...
Where'd you buy this thing from?
I got it from the Internet TV, you know what I mean?
On Anfor.
Hector's mobile gas station.
Where'd you get those things?
Was it your car?
I don't know.
I asked you.
Was it an infomercial at two o'clock in the morning?
Yeah, it was one of those things.
Hector's gas station.
Internet or on the TV, what was it?
Yeah, it was...
It was completely different.
If it's an Internet or the TV, did you see an ad or did you just find this on, like,
Amazon?
Yeah, it was...
Well, let me see this thing.
I'll test it on...
It's in my car.
I got it in my car.
I keep forgetting to bring it in.
But what does it do, though?
It's supposed to save you gas.
What does it?
I don't know.
I took it out because the blinking light made me nervous.
I was afraid of it.
No, you know, I mean, there are a lot of chips and stuff you can put in the car as it changed
the way it runs and doesn't matter which gets into it.
Right, I'm telling you that she's all atronic also.
And it's not really good either for you.
It's not, huh?
Yeah, they say it's not...
I mean, even if you save 10% and you think about over a year how much money you can save,
it could be...
You know, listen, we'll start buying carburetics and we'll get nervous and think it blinking.
According to the thing that I saw, it would double your money.
Yeah, there's other things.
Yeah.
And first of all, anybody that comes up with a good car idea usually gets murked.
Yeah, that's true.
That's right.
And yes, that's true.
Well, it's like improving...
We've all grown up.
If it's too good, if it sounds too good to be true...
Well, no, or if you invent a motor that runs on water, just keep it to yourself.
Yeah, right.
Seriously.
Shut your mouth and just get about it.
And we show a few of your family members or something close friends.
Well, don't even do that.
You know what?
No, you're right.
Anonymously download it to the Internet somehow and just share with everybody.
You can't make money on that stuff.
I mean, listen, there are people that are smarter than us.
No kidding.
No.
I haven't found anybody.
You want to be so silly.
It's very funny.
But people that are smarter and put more time in their stuff.
That's a dog.
You know what I mean?
There are people that are obsessed with clean energy, but not like windmills and shit.
Right, right.
Yeah, actual devices that are going to work.
They're going to save humanity.
They have all kinds of things that work better than gas and fuel.
Well, yeah, definitely.
Now, have you ever listened to Rogan podcast with Graham Hancock and Randall Carlson?
No, I have not.
I know.
I always don't know the people.
So these Randall Carlson's been working with guys, you know, PhDs.
I can't, I don't know.
I forget the technology, but they've been some new energy technology that's actually
really working and have some high end people like, I don't know about Musk, but high end
people really look and research and stuff, testing it.
And it's like, okay, yeah, that's the real deal.
It works.
I don't know if it's a plasma stack.
We're not saying it has to be something completely different than we've seen because we've seen
a couple of batteries.
And they already found the guy in the trunk of a coop to build.
Yeah, well, the beauty of it is they've invited a lot of people out to view this technology
working and it's like, all right, it's working.
Like, okay, so the government knows more than they're willing to let us know.
Obviously.
I mean, and they have, yeah.
I mean, on a massed so much stuff or a massed so much technology that we couldn't even fathom
what they have.
Oh, yeah.
No, yeah.
And the stuff that they keep from us.
So nothing really, nothing really shocks me anymore.
Right.
But it's like, let's say, remember when alien people were like, oh, if you let people know
about aliens, it's going to freak everybody out.
But here's the thing that bothers me now.
Now all of a sudden the government's like, oh yeah, there's UFOs everywhere.
They're dangerous.
They're like, okay.
So now it's like, okay, now, okay, you're telling us you are the ones controlling these
UFOs basically.
Yeah, exactly.
That's what I believe.
Once the government claims something's real, you know what I'm saying.
Who is that?
What are the huge military contractors like Northrop Drummond?
Boeing, Bigelow, Fruc.
Yeah, Bigelow, Northrop Drummond.
What's the other one?
I forget the other one.
Are they Boeing?
Shoot.
Skunkworks or?
No.
Skunkworks was actually a group of guys creating, I don't know if it was SR-71 or something.
There's a Blackbird.
Blackbird.
Yeah, but Northrop Drummond, something like that.
Yeah, Northrop Drummond.
There's another name, but I think the original owner, like his name was that.
Jeff Appolschin Laboratory?
No, I think he's dead now.
That's his original name.
I think he's dead now, but he got recorded saying, like back in the 80s, he's like,
we have technology, like you're seeing on Star Trek.
Oh, yeah, yeah.
I mean, he's like, we already have it.
Right.
He has to be with a claims to kiss an African American woman on Star Trek.
Yeah.
And she was a hottie.
Oh, yeah.
You know what?
Speaking of that, it's kind of funny.
Billy Shats.
Little Billy Shats.
I love Billy Shats, dude.
He's like the only actor that uses his name in anything he does acting.
He's Billy Shats.
And you got to love him.
Well, who does that?
But here, well, here's what?
Who uses Billy Shats?
Well, William, I'm really.
We call him Billy Shats.
No, I know, but not when he's acting in an actual role.
Oh, yeah.
Billy Shats.
Yeah.
He's William Shatter.
All the roles he does.
He acts as himself.
Not in Star Trek, but yeah, he's like William Shatter and all the different shows he does.
All right, but here, well, he brought up that he, you know, he kissed the first black
woman on TV, but that black woman.
Calm down, Harry.
All right.
She was actually pretty smoking hot.
She was.
I saw her doing a YouTube.
Yeah.
She wasn't painting green, was she?
No, no, no.
No, there was another one.
Yeah.
She had a YouTube video and she was talking about how she wanted to quit.
She was quitting Star Trek and then she met Martin Luther King and he's like, I'm a huge
fan.
He's like, this is the only show I'll let my children watch because you're an equal.
You're an equal.
Yeah.
It doesn't matter what the flavor.
What kind of gender is there?
There's no racism in space.
Yeah, it's like you're an equal.
And she said, well, I'm quitting.
I'm actually going back to being a singer and stuff like that.
And he's like, he's like, he almost lost it.
He's like, no, you can't quit MLK said.
Yeah.
MLK said this to her and she's like, no, you can't quit.
Yeah.
And she's like, well, after that, she's like, I'm back in for a while.
Yeah.
And it was just pretty cool story.
I think it only lasts like two seasons.
No, it went on for a while.
Star Trek?
Are you sure?
Six seasons.
It did.
Six times, seven seasons was a cartoon.
It actually won awards.
With the same scripts and everything, they were narrating the cartoon on Saturday mornings.
Really?
It got tons of awards.
Actually, I didn't get it.
I didn't get into Star Trek.
I think it was six seasons.
It was on a tour.
Shadner came back the second season.
I was in the real world.
40 pounds overweight.
And if the first season was all slick and hazy, and he looked like a hero and I loved the
show.
Yeah.
Next season he comes back.
He's got this big fucking belly on him.
He couldn't beat on to it anymore.
Even as a fucking child, I was like, how could he possibly be fighting these aliens?
Right.
He beat me up, Scotty.
Oh, Billy, oh, he had to go.
Okay.
Billy, I'm back next season.
The next season.
See, I don't remember any of this.
I do like, now I like Star Trek.
It's very funny.
If you look back at that old stuff, it's so archaic.
Like just like flashing buttons.
Yeah, it's excellent.
I don't know who the creators are, but there's a conspiracy theory talking about how the
creators were actually talking to powers of greater than themselves.
The powers that be.
Yeah.
All those guys.
And they were people from space.
Yeah.
And they were giving them the ideas of what really happens.
Well, if you go back in time, like we were talking about that.
What was that thing from night, if I was the devil from 1965, this guy literally laid
remember, did he lay it out exactly what they're doing right now?
Yeah.
And I do it.
I would drug everybody.
I would give everybody drink, you know what I mean?
I would create civil war.
If I was a devil.
Yeah, that is who is that again?
I forgot.
But speaking of the Star Trek thing.
No, well, they just five that's crazy.
It's Orson Welles stuff.
1984.
20 years before.
Orson Welles 1984.
Orson Welles is war of the worlds.
1984 is George Orwell.
You said this before.
Don't let that happen again.
No, but thank you.
I watched the episode and I'm like, oh, how could I let that slide?
I didn't let this.
But anyway, G Wells wrote war of the worlds.
But Orson Welles.
Okay, so then there we go.
Thank you.
No, he's not getting it.
No relationship.
But let me just say you're welcome, buddy.
But let me just say this real quick.
I want to fight.
I'm going to kick him right in the head.
But no, that's how it's supposed to.
Which one?
Mary was reading on the internet today and there's a reason they said this.
The Pentagon says that they're not ready or geared up or have enough manpower.
You're not ready for your manpower for an alien attack.
So get ready for some big fake.
Here, here, here.
Here's the gist of this.
Get ready for the fake alien attack.
What if aliens don't attack?
Well, we're not ready for it.
Alien attack!
If aliens ever wanted to attack and destroy our world, they wouldn't even have to show their face.
They wouldn't have done it by now.
No, they can just drop some disease.
It's no threat.
Go.
Did you hear that?
What?
Say that again, Larry.
58.
Oh.
This kid is...
I'm...
Well, no, let me just say something.
I do remember your...
I did last night...
Wait, let me tell you something.
I totally put you down about it, too.
No, let me say something.
No, let me tell you something.
I'm looking at that today.
The last three times when you said what time were we at?
And I said 54 because of my eyes.
One time it was 34.
One time it was 44.
And then another time it was like...
You're missing the four.
We are really going over the between the boats.
Wait, you're in terminal clots.
So what was it?
Take another look.
It should be a movie.
Are your eyes actually playing with you today?
Maybe.
No.
59.
But yeah, no, if aliens wanted to destroy us, they wouldn't have to set foot on this
planet.
They can just drop a biological disease and knock us out.
And they can go to space for a day.
20 years will pass and we'll all be dead.
Seriously, that's how it would work.
They would never come down.
The only reason they would come down here is if they wanted to actually communicate with
them.
If they wanted to communicate with us.
I don't know.
They're running them.
They run.
They run at the whole thing.
Don't they surprise me anymore?
If there are aliens lizards like we're saying because they're so soulless, they're running
the government.
They don't come from the core.
They come from maybe under the Earth because there's no core.
They're not running the Earth.
They're in the Earth.
They're not coming to space.
They're maybe in caves down deep, but they're not in the core because they're not in the
core because they found more caves.
They're in the slag.
They found more caves somewhere and tons of caves someplace else.
Remember the old thing?
They're finding caves and tunnels all over the world, all over the Earth.
How about this?
If you dug deep enough, you'd get to China.
Remember that?
You're a little kid.
How about this?
Check this out.
They're getting mad in Los Angeles because a lot of the bums are moving out and moving
into caves.
They give money for each bum so they want the headcount to be high.
They're pissed because now they don't get those people to go out.
They're living in a cave.
It's pretty cool.
That's why Los Angeles is all up in arms about it.
First thing I do is take a fucking hill.
There are caves on the beach.
There are caves everywhere.
We can find the caves.
They literally found more bums.
They're mad because the bums are hiding out in the desert in a cave.
They want them to be in Los Angeles because they want the money for it.
Bums are the least of our worries.
It's all the migrants who are letting in.
I know, but I'm just saying it's so funny though.
It's weird that they actually are encouraging and they want to come out of the cave and
please come back to a tent or box on a stretch.
We get registered for $9,000.
Los Angeles, they say it costs about $80,000 per homeless person.
That's how much it costs the city.
They get money from the federal government for it.
That's what they calculate.
It's like, okay, how much are you making?
$400,000 a year?
A person below you is making $200,000.
What are you guys doing?
Nothing?
I'm sure we've all known what it's like to be homeless.
We all lived out of our car for a period of time here or there.
It don't cost no $80,000.
Second, are these homeless living on the beach?
What's going on?
Do they got a beach in front of part of it?
What's the cost of the beach?
$80,000.
Do they have a drug allowance?
It's wandering and it's stealing money.
Like I said, how much the person in charge is making $400,000 a year?
A person under hers is making $200,000.
And then they're paying another person.
$10 left for the homeless.
Exactly.
There's a new track pipe.
Here's a vending machine.
You keep the money coming.
None of the homeless are actually going into these places they have to stay for them because
they can't use drugs.
They're like, well, we'll keep them empty because it's working paid.
I've known hotels that they ruin too, where they put all the people in there and they
just destroyed them.
Yeah.
And this isn't like Molly Crue destroying.
It's like shit and stuff.
You guys know him.
The problem is that I know all his time.
Remember when he was sitting in my car?
He won't go.
He doesn't want to go to his shelter because he can't drink.
He can't do anything.
He can't drink his bottle and smoke a little rock here and there or whatever.
You know, he'd rather sleep outside than be fucked up.
You have to be there at a certain time and shit it.
You have to.
You have rules.
Yeah.
They're not good with rules.
No, not at all.
But I do have a problem.
You got a shit in this toilet.
Yeah.
Ah, man.
Do you have a problem with the VA in Illinois?
Really?
Toilet, man.
That's unbelievable.
That is so colonized.
It's colonized, right?
I have a problem with the VA in Illinois donating money to the illegal aliens.
Yeah.
And fighting for my pap's shit and he was a veteran.
Well, no, I'm freezing.
They're mistreating veterans.
Oh, are they?
They're crazy.
Unbelievable.
They called us up.
These veterans should get everything.
They should get everything.
They'd come after a veteran.
We would get care.
Someone would come to my parents' house and take care of them four days a week.
Now it's two.
Wow.
We have budget cuts.
Yeah.
So I talked to the guy.
Right.
And I said, you know, it's just a guy.
Yeah.
The VA is the story.
He doesn't run the joint.
No, not at all.
And he's probably sympathizing.
Oh, no, he's a good guy.
He's been coming for months and he's like, I can't believe he's like they're cutting
my hours or doing all this stuff.
He's like they're bringing people in for medical care that aren't from this country.
Yeah.
He's like, I'm a vet.
So it's eating up the time.
What's that?
It's eating up their time.
They gotta care for these.
And their funds and resources.
And the thing is, we wouldn't even be living the way we are.
We wouldn't even be living the way we're living if it wasn't for people like your father.
That's great.
Freedom isn't free.
It really isn't, man.
And that's what's going on right now.
Like Donnie Anforth and I were talking about, I know there's some sort of rumblings of a
civil war in our own country pitting our own people against the children.
Oh, yeah.
They love for that.
Because of this system that is just letting people in.
That's what we're trying to do.
They're trying to make this war.
And then when you look at it and it breaks it down, I sent that story today.
50 migrants arrested in two months for robbing stores in Oakbrook.
Yeah.
Yes.
I gotta stop.
I'm not saying that all people are like this.
My wife goes to Oakbrook.
It's fancy.
To Oakbrook's top notch.
Yeah.
It's nice of them.
What did you see the video of all the migrants like having furniture delivered?
Putting that shit in that building.
Yeah, it was probably like 30 of them.
They had furniture delivered to the place going up.
And they were going until it was all boarded up.
I don't blame them.
I'd be doing the same thing.
If they tell you you're going to have a better life here, what are you going to do?
Nature finds a way.
People find a way.
No, they're survivors.
They do what they have to do.
They come from countries we could not understand.
I saw a story.
If we had to, we were survivors too.
We'd be doing the same thing.
If you had to walk to Guatemala or something, you'll have to do it.
Maybe you're not ready for it the first day.
They were born in struggle and strife.
They were...
I agree.
Okay.
Donnie and Fort Biden.
I don't think they were as unhappy as you think they are, Neville.
Yes, exactly.
We've taken these countries...
Some are complaining that they've collapsed their government.
You're saying that people aren't born into struggle and strife right here.
The rural white people in the...
Oh, calm down there Larry.
You didn't say that.
In the country, you know...
He talked to me?
Yeah, he did.
The people in the ghetto, in the inner cities that are...
There's people born into struggle and strife.
I'm saying though that this country is a lot better than other countries.
Sure.
They're born in a struggle.
You can get housing from Section 8.
You can get food stamps.
You're born in Ecuador in some village.
And the weather's beautiful every day.
But a hotel runs it and they're taking all the children.
And even healthcare too.
There's a lot of crazy stuff.
And then all of a sudden, NATO and the UN and the Red Cross come in and they're like,
Hey, you can have a better life.
Here's some money.
Start walking.
The daring gap is a very scary, dangerous place.
And these people are crossing it to get to this country.
And you know what that means?
We are taking advantage of who we are as Americans.
I love this country, like I said.
I'm proud to be an American and people forget that.
Everybody hates this country.
And I would leave the country.
I mean, the president hates this country.
They once loved us.
No, seriously, though.
Joe Biden is racist to white people.
No, man.
I come home and practically kiss the ground, especially if I was like in Europe and some filthy shit like that.
I come home and kiss the ground right back to the USA.
Hey, did you guys hear the message Tucker Carlson left Justin Trudeau?
Oh, no.
He took his office here.
He's like, oh, hey, Mr. Trudeau.
I don't understand the French.
Yeah, it's like, I don't understand the French stuff.
But just to let you know, we're coming to, what did he say?
He's like, we're coming to release the country.
We're coming to here to...
To liberate the Canadians.
We're coming to Liberation.
30, 40,000 people attended that rally.
I won't say rally.
That sounds bad.
His correspondence...
His speech.
There we go.
40,000 people or whatever.
Yeah, he's a piece of work.
Showed up to hear him speak.
You know what the thing is, is that people try to cancel you.
It was like a kiss concert.
Freedom of speech anymore.
That is the worst thing that can happen to us as Americans is they take away our speech.
I don't care about guns.
I don't care about money, anything.
Well, we can't talk...
Well, we only can't talk...
Guns and speech.
You got to have both.
Well...
Because without the guns...
Yeah, you're in Mexico.
Well, you are.
You ain't going to be talking about it.
The world country.
But you know what I meant, though.
Freedom of speech is very important.
It's up there.
It's number one.
You have to.
Our God-given rights.
And I should read that.
Right, and that's the part that they forget.
It's not the government-given rights.
It's our God-given rights.
Well, people have lost faith.
The almighty dollar, which is almost becoming worthless, is more than God.
And like we were talking about, God's children cannot be bought.
And then you see all these people being bought.
And that's how you know Ricky Lake...
Not Ricky Lake.
Dairy Lake.
That's how you know...
Ricky Lake.
Shout out to Ricky Lake.
Ricky's baby.
Whoo!
She was a nice piece of pork chop.
Yeah, she was a porky one, all right.
But she wasn't a bad porky one.
I'm just saying.
I never said that was bad.
No, yeah.
She was okay.
But, yeah, that's how you know Carrie Lake is so down because she can't be bought.
Well...
And that guy was all up in arms that she recorded him, and he...
I think he resigned.
He did resign, and now he's saying it's blackmail.
But she recorded this a while back.
Yeah, and they turned the reverse it on.
He got another vid about her second time trying to be bribed.
Did you see that?
Oh, really?
No, I didn't.
The guy had a list of asks.
Wow.
For a million dollars she turned down and the lady was like, I've never...
Or whoever was in her staff was like, I've never seen anybody turn down a million dollars.
Which is just that much.
But really think about it.
Now what is a million...
No.
Not to sell yourself out, man.
No.
I like to sleep at night myself.
Are you kidding me?
People do that, isn't it crazy?
Yeah.
All right.
Do your hit list.
I just paid 200 bucks two weekends in a row to get two cats cremated because I just won't
throw them in the garbage.
Yeah.
Well, you gotta start an old fan.
So I forgot where I was going with that.
The ground was pretty nice.
You should have...
They're barbecue tips.
You know what?
Did you notice this weird snow?
It's not melting.
It's been 37, 38 degrees and raining three days in a row and the snow is still this deep.
You know, I hate to tell you about this topic.
In the fog.
You can't talk to me about it because we work on a job site and we had nine foot piles of
snow.
Now the snow is not melting.
It is melting a little bit.
Well, I don't think the ground is going to be thawed out in one day.
It wasn't one day, so on multiple days at not just a low freezing temperature, you gotta
go 18 inches to get it.
Wow.
All right, let's do your hit list.
It's too late.
Plus I wasn't going to go dig a grave in the rain last night, brother.
Oh man, that sounds perfect for your emo lifestyle.
Get lantern out.
Yeah.
You're going to get a song about it.
I'm dug a cat grave.
The umbrella in the rain.
You're a master.
Well, here's the thing.
Here, somebody say something.
April or something.
Well, when I'm digging a cat grave, usually every single shovel scoop, I say something
about the cat.
How great he was or how much I loved him.
That's nice.
And by the end, I'm fucking crying and everything.
So, you know, it's a traumatic thing to bury one of them and you gotta dig the hole pretty
deep.
It's a lot of people.
This cat was tough.
This cat was cute.
This cat was cool.
Every shovels by the end, I'm like, oh man, this was the greatest cat I've ever, you know.
Well, you start remembering everything.
I remember when he killed that squirrel.
I remember when he killed those birds.
I remember when he got the wood.
I'll tell you what, I have a harder time seeing animals die than humans.
Me too, bro.
It's weird.
Oh yeah.
Or somebody abuses an animal.
Oh, that's the word.
That kills you.
Man, that does kill me, man.
That's a thing.
I hate to see it.
It's crazy how we probably spend about a billion dollars a year.
I think the person who gets the most points is someone hurting an animal, honestly.
Me too.
It really doesn't affect me as much.
I see someone hurting an animal.
It creates more of a visceral reaction than human being.
I saw a video on the internet where it showed this black kid in the ghetto and one of his
friends was filming him and there's a cat on the corner and he just runs up and kicks
the thing so hard and it goes flying and they're all laughing.
You're really proud of his friends laughing.
The problem is, man, that's like so killer.
I wanted to reach out to the screen, man.
They think it's cool.
I actually think it's cool.
But then you think about how they grew.
Yeah, it's just terrible.
Anyways, are we going to do a song?
I don't want to do a long list.
I just want to say, hey, Ross, be safe out there in Thailand.
Thank you, Jesus.
God, please.
Here's our...
Wait a second.
No, no.
Ross, go on.
Give me a second.
He said, Pah Thaiah from what I heard.
He said, he's having fun right now.
I should have went to the freaking Egypt.
Tell me when you're ready.
And we'll do our punk rock ukulele exit song.
Here we go.
All right, it's fine.
Drive here.
We, the people of the United States, in order to form a more perfect union, establish
justice, ensure domestic tranquility, provide for the common defense, promote the general
welfare and secure the blessings of liberty to ourselves and our prosperity, do ordain
and establish this constitution for the United States of America.
Yeah.
Red, white and blue.
Yeah.
That's cute.
And just to ring the gong and say it was a very honorable episode.
Thanks for tuning in, everybody.
We'll see you next time on Larry and Needle's show.
I'm Larry.
I'm Needles.
I'm Kiki.
I'm Don.
All right.
Peace, everybody.
Take care, Slade.
Tell your enemies.
It's like comic books.