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Time to get ready for the Larry and Needles Show.

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Larry and Needles.

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Larry and Needles.

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Larry and Needles.

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Larry and Needles.

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Larry and Needles.

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Show.

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Alright everybody, welcome to Larry and Needles Show.

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I'm Larry.

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And I'm Needles.

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We got Frank.

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Hey.

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And Mark.

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Don and Forth making a comeback.

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So we were just talking.

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Talk to and I got to apologize last time.

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Oh yeah, do the hit list man from the beginning.

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I gotta say the first thing is so I don't get my legs broken.

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I forgot to save Tom's Free Clinic Automotive and Veterinarian Services.

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Thank you for the slow you were talking.

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You're gonna start, wait, we're gonna, I thought you wanted to start at the shoutouts first.

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Okay.

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Automotive, I wasn't ready for that yet.

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Okay, okay, we'll do the, we'll do the shoutout.

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We'll close out with that.

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Thank God, Jesus Christ.

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Thank you God, thank you Jesus.

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Get ready with God.

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The Holy Spirit.

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The Holy Spirit.

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He will sucker punch you in the throat with the Holy Spirit.

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My, I was mad at you Alex.

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You already love you.

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Nick, Jeff.

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Nick, I know you're allergic to cotton so try polyester.

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Bobby, Frank, he's right here.

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Frank's a beard.

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My dad, Groucho.

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Big Joe, Groucho.

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Stupid puppets right there.

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Chris.

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Matt.

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Hope you feel better brother.

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Ross.

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Matt, you're still gay.

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Dave.

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Ross, love you.

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Zodiac.

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Dave, thanks for the con.

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You're reading him so fast.

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Zodiac.

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Well, they don't stop.

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I mean, you're going to fucking, Jesus.

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Harmony, Helena, Sherry.

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Kat, love you Sherry.

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Sherry, we showed you bass in the last episode.

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Oh, that's not a euphemism.

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Jay.

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Chrissy, Becky, Tiffany, Georgie out there in Colorado.

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Crypto Beach, Swarnhawk, Richie, Ujaville, Colorado.

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Oh, wait a second.

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How's that?

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I hope, I, man, Ujaville, I'm really sorry about that Indian prison.

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He's in an Indian prison right now in New Delhi.

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He's good now.

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We just sent him commissary.

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What happened, really?

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We sent him a million rupees.

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Ujavi?

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Yeah, Ujaville.

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Ujaville.

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You better don't disrespect his name.

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Yes.

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Yes, he got arrested.

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He was arrested in a bus rape.

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He was just changing the tire.

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And Carlone.

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Carlone, love you, brother.

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David, I know you're watching and over there in Starbucks.

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Oh, nice.

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Camille, my other buddy from Starbucks who doesn't work there anymore.

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All right.

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So, Tom's, you're going to forget again.

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Yes.

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You really almost forgot.

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Tom's Free Clinic Automotive and Veterinarian Services is truly the one-stop shop.

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If the sore's on your lips, start it in between your girlfriend's hips.

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Call Tom's Free Clinic.

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Oh, we're still in fucking...

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We're all good.

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That's fine.

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I don't like that camera.

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And that's called camera switching.

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Oh, thanks Larry.

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So technical.

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Now that you're our producer, you guys four beers deep and he's trying to kiss the guest.

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Yeah, okay, whatever.

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I mean, a guy wearing a coat like that really can't have no ground to stand on.

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You look like fucking, what's her name, Liz Taylor.

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And so you look like, with her short hair.

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Or who's the other one?

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Frank, you can't even call them fucking bears?

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You're going to have to go re-fill this fucking hole.

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All the beers.

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Where's he the fuck?

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Yeah.

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What's her name, man?

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Liv Tyler?

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No, no, what's the one, the very fucking, nah, the snag, Liza Minnelli.

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Do you look like in that jacket?

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Oh yeah.

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We're like a, what's your left for your wife's closet?

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Hey man, I've been wearing this a long time and I don't think...

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To all the gay clubs, I mean, come on.

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Fucking number one finoco over there.

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Something's got to make you stand out.

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We're not to a fanook rodeo.

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Something's got to make you stand out when the rest of you go.

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Yeah, okay.

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Right.

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It's not the Viagra, it's your jacket.

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I actually stopped wearing the black leather jacket while I was at...

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No, that's not all wrong.

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What place one night?

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Every single person walking into a black leather jacket.

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I'm taking this thing off and never...

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The same style?

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Yeah, black leather jacket, dude.

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What style?

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Yeah, it's Chicago.

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What are you fucking doing, dude?

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Welcome to Chicago, we all were black.

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The fuck out of here.

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Whoa, why are you being racist?

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I'm not being racist.

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You think we're wearing a lot of black?

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Go to New York.

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Yeah.

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Everybody's wearing black.

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I'm just gonna scroll.

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You too while you're on the podcast.

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Come on, you mama Luke, take your shit off.

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I'm gonna take your phone away in two seconds.

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Stop.

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Why are you doing that?

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Why are you guys doing that?

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I was just checking something.

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Fuck.

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Guys, he's motherfucking addicted.

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That's what he is.

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What a fucking...

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Seriously addicted.

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Last time you touched a boob van Halen was popular.

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He's fucking...

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Yeah.

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He'd rather stare at his phone.

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No.

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No.

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He had to think about that for a second.

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That's what he thought.

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They had incurable disease around that time.

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Halen II.

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S-D-I-A.

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Oh.

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Oh, you had sickle thoughts.

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No, no, I am hooking.

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I can't get out of my fucking house, dude.

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I literally wake up, struffle out to the room, and turn on that damn smart TV.

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Hit the MC, right?

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First, though.

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But you hit the MC in the morning, right?

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That's it.

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You know what the MC is?

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No, I...

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You know what it is, eh?

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No.

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Oh.

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The clinic.

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No, I don't have to go every day, dude.

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I'm K.

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MC.

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MC.

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Don't worry about it.

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Don't worry about it.

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The old MC.

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Oh, yeah.

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You ate a motorcycle claw.

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No, I just told you.

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I don't leave the house.

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I don't go anyplace.

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The problem is I don't ever leave.

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Maybe I should start going every day.

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How often do you have to go to the clinic?

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I don't.

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Every two weeks.

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What's your place?

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It's gonna be a month soon.

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Oh, boy.

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Yeah.

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We're really letting you go there, aren't we?

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What's the appointment?

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No, no, no.

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This guy's got a baker's dozen going up.

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Yeah.

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It's 12 years and running.

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Don't laugh.

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He froze.

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What?

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I don't laugh.

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Honestly.

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Fuck.

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Did you see?

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Fuck you freaking me out, bro.

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We're not.

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He fucking froze.

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Go.

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So I can't go to the clinic.

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I can't go to the clinic.

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You're gonna be in a hurry.

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I can't remember what to say.

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Would you keep fucking blocking me coming in?

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We're erupting.

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It would be good if you were going to the old MC every day so you'd get out of the house.

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You said you wanted to leave.

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I can't.

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You said you wanted to go out of the house to go to the MC every day.

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No, I don't go to the MC.

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No, dude.

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You said you wanted to leave.

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You fucking blew the whole thing.

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I can't remember what I was talking about.

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I apologize, Danny, unfortunately.

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I don't go there every day.

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You said every two weeks and then it's gonna be a month.

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Yes, I know.

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I'm listening to you, man.

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Just having fun busting your balls.

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You wanna talk about giants?

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No.

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Come on.

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I know that makes you happy.

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Do what it's fine.

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I'll tickle you and talk about giants.

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Don't worry about it, buddy.

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The Nephilim.

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You wanna talk about the Nephilim?

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Well, I'm hooked on social media.

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I'm doting my Facebook.

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Well, why are you looking at your phone?

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We're talking here.

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I'll do it.

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Watch it.

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You are in the middle of a live conversation and you'd rather look at your phone.

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That's what I mean.

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I'm seriously addicted to this.

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We'll put it down.

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Give me your phone, asshole.

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No, I'm not giving it to anybody.

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You know, you can't put it over your life.

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Oh, yeah.

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Do you see nudes who send you your butthole pictures?

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No, that's not like that.

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I'm talking about GRI.

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Me and Joe see them what?

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Two times in the last, what, six months?

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Shit, man.

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Yeah?

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Thousand times.

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No, in the last, no, not that.

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No, you know, we don't wanna talk about concert, man.

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Why?

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It was a good time.

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It was a great time, but, you know, I talked about it already.

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You looked good for the show.

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It was fun, man.

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What about the next show?

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When's the next show?

278
00:07:37,000 --> 00:07:40,000
I wanna go to see some fucking good punk rock, man.

279
00:07:40,000 --> 00:07:41,000
How about this?

280
00:07:41,000 --> 00:07:43,000
Spirit of 77 is playing.

281
00:07:43,000 --> 00:07:49,000
February 10th at fucking Chicago Loop and Streamwood, Illinois.

282
00:07:49,000 --> 00:07:53,000
If you are living in the surrounding area, man, if you're around here, go there.

283
00:07:53,000 --> 00:07:55,000
When you go to the door, you go there.

284
00:07:55,000 --> 00:07:56,000
Who are Spirit of 77?

285
00:07:56,000 --> 00:07:58,000
They play Nickelback tunes.

286
00:07:58,000 --> 00:07:59,000
That's all they play.

287
00:07:59,000 --> 00:08:02,000
We play dead Kennedys and fucking Sex Pistols.

288
00:08:02,000 --> 00:08:04,000
These guys don't know anything about punk.

289
00:08:04,000 --> 00:08:08,000
Yeah, and, you know, Ramones and Danny Connors.

290
00:08:08,000 --> 00:08:09,000
I mean, look at that jacket.

291
00:08:09,000 --> 00:08:10,000
Once a finook, always a finook.

292
00:08:10,000 --> 00:08:12,000
What is it for, you say, in Streamwood?

293
00:08:12,000 --> 00:08:20,000
Right, but it's right next door to good time music on the stream, on Bartlett Road.

294
00:08:20,000 --> 00:08:21,000
Right, right, right, right, right.

295
00:08:21,000 --> 00:08:22,000
It's a bar.

296
00:08:22,000 --> 00:08:23,000
It's a bar.

297
00:08:23,000 --> 00:08:24,000
That's a cool one.

298
00:08:24,000 --> 00:08:25,000
And one time we played there.

299
00:08:25,000 --> 00:08:26,000
It's a shit hole.

300
00:08:26,000 --> 00:08:29,000
It's a rock hole.

301
00:08:29,000 --> 00:08:30,000
Yeah, it's kind of a shit hole.

302
00:08:30,000 --> 00:08:31,000
It really is.

303
00:08:31,000 --> 00:08:32,000
It's a dive.

304
00:08:32,000 --> 00:08:33,000
It's a dive bar.

305
00:08:33,000 --> 00:08:34,000
Here's the funniest part.

306
00:08:34,000 --> 00:08:36,000
I'm not just saying, the ambiance is great.

307
00:08:36,000 --> 00:08:37,000
That's what it's good.

308
00:08:37,000 --> 00:08:38,000
I'm glad it's a shit hole.

309
00:08:38,000 --> 00:08:39,000
It's going to be great.

310
00:08:39,000 --> 00:08:40,000
Right.

311
00:08:40,000 --> 00:08:42,000
If it wasn't a shit hole, it would be a shit hole.

312
00:08:42,000 --> 00:08:46,000
Why would you want to go see a punk rock show if it wasn't a shit hole?

313
00:08:46,000 --> 00:08:51,000
And the other thing is, one time this guy that runs this fucking joint yelled at my old

314
00:08:51,000 --> 00:08:52,000
band, Eastside Wildcats.

315
00:08:52,000 --> 00:08:56,000
And I was in with my neighbor Tony and Bobby.

316
00:08:56,000 --> 00:09:03,440
And I think Jeff, maybe Matt and fucking yelled at us for playing cards just for killing some

317
00:09:03,440 --> 00:09:04,800
time before the gig.

318
00:09:04,800 --> 00:09:06,000
Like we did the sound check.

319
00:09:06,000 --> 00:09:08,000
We yelled at for playing cards.

320
00:09:08,000 --> 00:09:09,000
Why?

321
00:09:09,000 --> 00:09:11,000
And the guys like, no gambling.

322
00:09:11,000 --> 00:09:12,000
We were like, we have no money.

323
00:09:12,000 --> 00:09:13,000
We're the band.

324
00:09:13,000 --> 00:09:14,000
We're not gambling.

325
00:09:14,000 --> 00:09:16,000
We're just fucking killing some time.

326
00:09:16,000 --> 00:09:17,000
How about that shit?

327
00:09:17,000 --> 00:09:19,000
No playing cards in my fucking bars.

328
00:09:19,000 --> 00:09:20,000
Wow.

329
00:09:20,000 --> 00:09:21,000
Yeah.

330
00:09:21,000 --> 00:09:24,000
And I had to put the cards back in my guitar case.

331
00:09:24,000 --> 00:09:28,000
I think that's just someone who just wants too much power, man.

332
00:09:28,000 --> 00:09:29,000
Yeah.

333
00:09:29,000 --> 00:09:30,000
Everybody wants power, right?

334
00:09:30,000 --> 00:09:33,000
No, I mean, why would you stop people from playing a card game that's not even gambling?

335
00:09:33,000 --> 00:09:34,000
Yeah, exactly.

336
00:09:34,000 --> 00:09:36,000
Because you just want to exert their power.

337
00:09:36,000 --> 00:09:37,000
And it's your authority.

338
00:09:37,000 --> 00:09:38,000
Exactly.

339
00:09:38,000 --> 00:09:40,000
I mean, fucking, if these guys were here.

340
00:09:40,000 --> 00:09:41,000
Right.

341
00:09:41,000 --> 00:09:42,000
That's what I mean.

342
00:09:42,000 --> 00:09:43,000
How many were there?

343
00:09:43,000 --> 00:09:44,000
How many was he?

344
00:09:44,000 --> 00:09:45,000
One?

345
00:09:45,000 --> 00:09:46,000
And you were how many?

346
00:09:46,000 --> 00:09:47,000
He was one and there was five of us.

347
00:09:47,000 --> 00:09:48,000
Exactly.

348
00:09:48,000 --> 00:09:49,000
If they wanted to exert their power, and they would have fucking said something.

349
00:09:49,000 --> 00:09:52,000
You're just going to raid the joint and you're going to get in trouble because these guys

350
00:09:52,000 --> 00:09:53,000
are having a poker game.

351
00:09:53,000 --> 00:09:56,000
Even if they were having a real poker game with legitimate money.

352
00:09:56,000 --> 00:09:57,000
I'm just looking too deep into it.

353
00:09:57,000 --> 00:09:58,000
The chance of that happening, right?

354
00:09:58,000 --> 00:10:00,000
I'm looking way too deep into it, Ann Ford.

355
00:10:00,000 --> 00:10:01,000
I mean.

356
00:10:01,000 --> 00:10:02,000
No, the guy is looking way too deep into it.

357
00:10:02,000 --> 00:10:03,000
Yeah.

358
00:10:03,000 --> 00:10:04,000
Everything is a conspiracy.

359
00:10:04,000 --> 00:10:05,000
Right.

360
00:10:05,000 --> 00:10:06,000
That's right.

361
00:10:06,000 --> 00:10:07,000
You know, that's ridiculous.

362
00:10:07,000 --> 00:10:10,000
The deeper you dig, the darker it gets.

363
00:10:10,000 --> 00:10:11,000
Wow, man.

364
00:10:11,000 --> 00:10:13,000
The darker it gets, the hotter it is.

365
00:10:13,000 --> 00:10:14,000
What do you mean what's next?

366
00:10:14,000 --> 00:10:15,000
I'm always pushing.

367
00:10:15,000 --> 00:10:20,000
I'm just going to do what I'm going to do, Frank, I hate to tell you.

368
00:10:20,000 --> 00:10:23,000
I'm going to try it.

369
00:10:23,000 --> 00:10:26,000
You all right there, Danny, and Ford?

370
00:10:26,000 --> 00:10:29,000
No, I lost my cane to call for the movie.

371
00:10:29,000 --> 00:10:30,000
My train of conversation.

372
00:10:30,000 --> 00:10:31,000
My thought is gone.

373
00:10:31,000 --> 00:10:32,000
You lost your train of thought?

374
00:10:32,000 --> 00:10:33,000
Yeah.

375
00:10:33,000 --> 00:10:34,000
I'm really bad here.

376
00:10:34,000 --> 00:10:35,000
You're really bad here.

377
00:10:35,000 --> 00:10:36,000
What did you want to talk about?

378
00:10:36,000 --> 00:10:37,000
I can't remember now.

379
00:10:37,000 --> 00:10:38,000
I used some of the documentary though.

380
00:10:38,000 --> 00:10:39,000
Right.

381
00:10:39,000 --> 00:10:40,000
I had it.

382
00:10:40,000 --> 00:10:41,000
Exactly.

383
00:10:41,000 --> 00:10:42,000
I had a subject I can remember.

384
00:10:42,000 --> 00:10:44,000
But I know you had a documentary that you wanted to talk about.

385
00:10:44,000 --> 00:10:45,000
I can't remember.

386
00:10:45,000 --> 00:10:46,000
I wish you could remember.

387
00:10:46,000 --> 00:10:47,000
Donnie and Ford did.

388
00:10:47,000 --> 00:10:48,000
I know.

389
00:10:48,000 --> 00:10:49,000
I can't remember what it was.

390
00:10:49,000 --> 00:10:50,000
Oh, it was a good one, dude.

391
00:10:50,000 --> 00:10:51,000
I guess I'd write and sit down.

392
00:10:51,000 --> 00:10:53,000
Well, that would be good conspiracy theories.

393
00:10:53,000 --> 00:10:55,000
I can't even make fucking four phone calls.

394
00:10:55,000 --> 00:10:56,000
Yeah.

395
00:10:56,000 --> 00:10:59,000
When you need to make these three phone calls, dude, you're mental to my health.

396
00:10:59,000 --> 00:11:00,000
When you need to make these three phone calls, dude, you're mental to my health.

397
00:11:00,000 --> 00:11:01,000
We take a lot of fucking notes, man.

398
00:11:01,000 --> 00:11:02,000
And I won't do it.

399
00:11:02,000 --> 00:11:04,000
You won't do what?

400
00:11:04,000 --> 00:11:05,000
Take notes?

401
00:11:05,000 --> 00:11:07,000
We make these three phone calls.

402
00:11:07,000 --> 00:11:08,000
I mean, speaking of...

403
00:11:08,000 --> 00:11:11,000
Well, you make crazy phone calls in the middle of the night to your friends talking about...

404
00:11:11,000 --> 00:11:13,000
Speaking of conspiracy theories, okay.

405
00:11:13,000 --> 00:11:14,000
Is that a box cutter?

406
00:11:14,000 --> 00:11:15,000
Yeah.

407
00:11:15,000 --> 00:11:16,000
Are you doing a 9-11 tribute?

408
00:11:16,000 --> 00:11:18,000
Yeah, look it.

409
00:11:18,000 --> 00:11:20,000
This is a box cutter, right?

410
00:11:20,000 --> 00:11:21,000
This is the little bit of...

411
00:11:21,000 --> 00:11:22,000
This is the only box cutter in the world.

412
00:11:22,000 --> 00:11:24,000
This is the razor blade that sticks out.

413
00:11:24,000 --> 00:11:25,000
This is from Chicago Messenger Service.

414
00:11:25,000 --> 00:11:26,000
I'm terrified of those things.

415
00:11:26,000 --> 00:11:27,000
My God.

416
00:11:27,000 --> 00:11:28,000
Great fucking...

417
00:11:28,000 --> 00:11:29,000
That thing will slice your throat.

418
00:11:29,000 --> 00:11:30,000
Oh, there are quite a few.

419
00:11:30,000 --> 00:11:31,000
It is a weapon of destruction.

420
00:11:31,000 --> 00:11:35,000
I don't think you're going to be able to fucking hijack an airplane with this motherfucker.

421
00:11:35,000 --> 00:11:37,000
Oh, there were seven of them.

422
00:11:37,000 --> 00:11:38,000
Weren't there or something?

423
00:11:38,000 --> 00:11:39,000
Come on.

424
00:11:39,000 --> 00:11:40,000
One plane, you know what I mean?

425
00:11:40,000 --> 00:11:41,000
There's like two on each plane with...

426
00:11:41,000 --> 00:11:42,000
Give me a fucking break.

427
00:11:42,000 --> 00:11:43,000
I'm already feeling like that.

428
00:11:43,000 --> 00:11:45,000
Dude, you're going to take over the fucking world with this thing.

429
00:11:45,000 --> 00:11:48,000
I'll take that out of your hands real fast.

430
00:11:48,000 --> 00:11:49,000
That?

431
00:11:49,000 --> 00:11:50,000
Seriously.

432
00:11:50,000 --> 00:11:54,500
Yeah, but if you're unsuspecting people that are not trained, you're definitely going

433
00:11:54,500 --> 00:11:56,000
to be fucking taking advantage of them.

434
00:11:56,000 --> 00:11:57,000
Dude, that's still...

435
00:11:57,000 --> 00:12:01,000
Listen, if you pull a blade on someone, some people are going to be very...

436
00:12:01,000 --> 00:12:02,000
They're going to cower very quickly.

437
00:12:02,000 --> 00:12:04,000
When you're on an airplane, you've got those aisles and shit.

438
00:12:04,000 --> 00:12:07,000
Yeah, but if you have to have people that are willing to fucking...

439
00:12:07,000 --> 00:12:08,000
It's a very...

440
00:12:08,000 --> 00:12:10,000
First of all, why are we talking about this?

441
00:12:10,000 --> 00:12:11,000
Because this never happened.

442
00:12:11,000 --> 00:12:12,000
I was just...

443
00:12:12,000 --> 00:12:13,000
I mean...

444
00:12:13,000 --> 00:12:14,000
Oh, it happened.

445
00:12:14,000 --> 00:12:15,000
It was just too much show and tell box.

446
00:12:15,000 --> 00:12:16,000
I mean, you're telling me that...

447
00:12:16,000 --> 00:12:18,000
Could you please put that blade away?

448
00:12:18,000 --> 00:12:19,000
Can you tuck it in?

449
00:12:19,000 --> 00:12:20,000
But they didn't use it.

450
00:12:20,000 --> 00:12:21,000
Jesus, man.

451
00:12:21,000 --> 00:12:22,000
They weren't...

452
00:12:22,000 --> 00:12:27,000
This guy's got the knot in out four seconds ago and you gave him a fucking box cutter?

453
00:12:27,000 --> 00:12:30,000
I mean, are you just trying to hurt someone?

454
00:12:30,000 --> 00:12:31,000
They're not...

455
00:12:31,000 --> 00:12:33,000
Call the Chicago Messenger Service.

456
00:12:33,000 --> 00:12:35,000
312-666-6800.

457
00:12:35,000 --> 00:12:38,000
So, you're going to say that...

458
00:12:38,000 --> 00:12:40,000
Deliver's excellent, ladies and gentlemen.

459
00:12:40,000 --> 00:12:41,000
Oh, what do you call it?

460
00:12:41,000 --> 00:12:42,000
No, I don't mind wondering.

461
00:12:42,000 --> 00:12:44,000
Are they still doing business to Messenger Service?

462
00:12:44,000 --> 00:12:45,000
I doubt it, man.

463
00:12:45,000 --> 00:12:46,000
With the fucking internet?

464
00:12:46,000 --> 00:12:49,000
No, people still need documents, bro.

465
00:12:49,000 --> 00:12:51,000
People still need documents, fucking.

466
00:12:51,000 --> 00:12:52,000
Yeah, paper.

467
00:12:52,000 --> 00:12:53,000
Court and shit.

468
00:12:53,000 --> 00:12:54,000
People want packages.

469
00:12:54,000 --> 00:12:55,000
Sure, sure.

470
00:12:55,000 --> 00:12:56,000
It's just nowhere near as big as it was.

471
00:12:56,000 --> 00:12:59,000
I'm sure they wrote drugs and shit through that shit, too.

472
00:12:59,000 --> 00:13:00,000
So you remember the drug?

473
00:13:00,000 --> 00:13:02,000
You get a guy who plays ball for a Messenger Service.

474
00:13:02,000 --> 00:13:03,000
Fuck yeah, man.

475
00:13:03,000 --> 00:13:04,000
Pick up the drugs.

476
00:13:04,000 --> 00:13:05,000
Drop them off.

477
00:13:05,000 --> 00:13:07,000
Just like taking a cab.

478
00:13:07,000 --> 00:13:08,000
Yeah.

479
00:13:08,000 --> 00:13:09,000
To do your drops, you know?

480
00:13:09,000 --> 00:13:10,000
Look, pregnant.

481
00:13:10,000 --> 00:13:11,000
Good lady.

482
00:13:11,000 --> 00:13:16,000
You know what's weird is my nephew got arrested for drinking or a ticket.

483
00:13:16,000 --> 00:13:17,000
I don't know if he got arrested.

484
00:13:17,000 --> 00:13:18,000
Dude, wait a minute.

485
00:13:18,000 --> 00:13:22,000
He had a ticket for drinking underage as a passenger in an Uber car.

486
00:13:22,000 --> 00:13:23,000
Okay.

487
00:13:23,000 --> 00:13:25,000
And he wasn't even drinking at the time.

488
00:13:25,000 --> 00:13:26,000
He was just drunk.

489
00:13:26,000 --> 00:13:27,000
Really?

490
00:13:27,000 --> 00:13:28,000
Okay.

491
00:13:28,000 --> 00:13:30,000
Oh, yeah, no, if you're a minor, they get you for that.

492
00:13:30,000 --> 00:13:31,000
Yeah, if you're...

493
00:13:31,000 --> 00:13:32,000
Well, you know, he was under 21, right?

494
00:13:32,000 --> 00:13:33,000
Yeah, that's fucking cool.

495
00:13:33,000 --> 00:13:34,000
Oh, well, then yeah, that's a good 21.

496
00:13:34,000 --> 00:13:35,000
Yeah, you can't...

497
00:13:35,000 --> 00:13:36,000
Well, listen to that.

498
00:13:36,000 --> 00:13:37,000
Why are you taking an Uber?

499
00:13:37,000 --> 00:13:38,000
Because you're fucked up?

500
00:13:38,000 --> 00:13:39,000
You're under 21.

501
00:13:39,000 --> 00:13:42,000
Why would they have the right to fuck with someone that's a passenger or Uber?

502
00:13:42,000 --> 00:13:43,000
They should do...

503
00:13:43,000 --> 00:13:44,000
Right, that's the thing.

504
00:13:44,000 --> 00:13:45,000
What did the Uber do wrong, though?

505
00:13:45,000 --> 00:13:46,000
That's right.

506
00:13:46,000 --> 00:13:47,000
What kind of...

507
00:13:47,000 --> 00:13:48,000
Why did they get pulled over?

508
00:13:48,000 --> 00:13:50,000
What does the Uber driver have to do with the passenger?

509
00:13:50,000 --> 00:13:51,000
Exactly.

510
00:13:51,000 --> 00:13:52,000
However, he drives...

511
00:13:52,000 --> 00:13:53,000
Right, and the car had nobody to...

512
00:13:53,000 --> 00:13:54,000
Because he's underage and he's intoxicated.

513
00:13:54,000 --> 00:13:55,000
That's against the law.

514
00:13:55,000 --> 00:13:56,000
But still...

515
00:13:56,000 --> 00:13:58,000
But if the Uber driver's doing what he does...

516
00:13:58,000 --> 00:13:59,000
There, you're missing the point.

517
00:13:59,000 --> 00:14:01,000
If you're underage and you're intoxicated...

518
00:14:01,000 --> 00:14:05,000
He's in the backseat of the car in an Uber yet alone.

519
00:14:05,000 --> 00:14:06,000
It's a hired car.

520
00:14:06,000 --> 00:14:07,000
Front seat in the car.

521
00:14:07,000 --> 00:14:08,000
No, the guy...

522
00:14:08,000 --> 00:14:09,000
No, he was in the backseat.

523
00:14:09,000 --> 00:14:10,000
He's a passenger.

524
00:14:10,000 --> 00:14:12,000
He's in the backseat of the car.

525
00:14:12,000 --> 00:14:13,000
A hired car.

526
00:14:13,000 --> 00:14:14,000
There's a driver.

527
00:14:14,000 --> 00:14:15,000
Right.

528
00:14:15,000 --> 00:14:16,000
The driver got pulled over.

529
00:14:16,000 --> 00:14:19,000
The only business the cop has is with that driver.

530
00:14:19,000 --> 00:14:21,000
He had none to do with the passenger's that vehicle at all.

531
00:14:21,000 --> 00:14:24,000
He had no right to ask that boy...

532
00:14:24,000 --> 00:14:25,000
Don Anford.

533
00:14:25,000 --> 00:14:26,000
How do you find out he got him drunk?

534
00:14:26,000 --> 00:14:27,000
Exactly.

535
00:14:27,000 --> 00:14:29,000
Don Anford's lawyer talked to the cop.

536
00:14:29,000 --> 00:14:31,000
He had no cooking business to do with.

537
00:14:31,000 --> 00:14:32,000
Exactly.

538
00:14:32,000 --> 00:14:33,000
And you know what else?

539
00:14:33,000 --> 00:14:36,000
I don't even think he was talking back or saying anything and he said,

540
00:14:36,000 --> 00:14:37,000
I don't like your slurring, son.

541
00:14:37,000 --> 00:14:38,000
He just fucking decided to ask.

542
00:14:38,000 --> 00:14:40,000
No, we don't know all the facts of the case.

543
00:14:40,000 --> 00:14:41,000
Well, it's my nephew.

544
00:14:41,000 --> 00:14:43,000
I kind of do know a couple of the facts.

545
00:14:43,000 --> 00:14:44,000
Just because he's your nephew.

546
00:14:44,000 --> 00:14:45,000
You don't know how to get you.

547
00:14:45,000 --> 00:14:48,000
Like when they say, do you know why I pulled you over?

548
00:14:48,000 --> 00:14:49,000
No, yeah.

549
00:14:49,000 --> 00:14:50,000
It's my nephew.

550
00:14:50,000 --> 00:14:51,000
I made him almost...

551
00:14:51,000 --> 00:14:52,000
Yeah, well, yeah.

552
00:14:52,000 --> 00:14:54,000
He got fucking pulled over.

553
00:14:54,000 --> 00:14:59,000
Well, Uber got pulled over and he got ticketed for being drunk underage.

554
00:14:59,000 --> 00:15:00,000
Okay.

555
00:15:00,000 --> 00:15:02,000
So that's what a boy was talking about.

556
00:15:02,000 --> 00:15:03,000
I don't know.

557
00:15:03,000 --> 00:15:05,000
I forgot why they pulled the Uber guy over.

558
00:15:05,000 --> 00:15:07,000
First of all, that is what they're going to say in court.

559
00:15:07,000 --> 00:15:08,000
We pulled the Uber over.

560
00:15:08,000 --> 00:15:10,000
We saw these two kids that were underage.

561
00:15:10,000 --> 00:15:11,000
I think he got out of it.

562
00:15:11,000 --> 00:15:12,000
It was a while back.

563
00:15:12,000 --> 00:15:13,000
Oh, okay.

564
00:15:13,000 --> 00:15:14,000
Well, then...

565
00:15:14,000 --> 00:15:16,000
Man, I don't know why we were bringing this up then.

566
00:15:16,000 --> 00:15:19,000
Because we got to fucking talk some shit, brah.

567
00:15:19,000 --> 00:15:24,000
I know, but I mean, as we're slamming beers in here.

568
00:15:24,000 --> 00:15:25,000
Don't drink and drive.

569
00:15:25,000 --> 00:15:26,000
Hey, I'm not underage.

570
00:15:26,000 --> 00:15:29,000
It's in the middle of a case right now.

571
00:15:29,000 --> 00:15:30,000
Which is...

572
00:15:30,000 --> 00:15:32,000
Frank's going to catch a case, man.

573
00:15:32,000 --> 00:15:33,000
No, don't say that, man.

574
00:15:33,000 --> 00:15:37,000
If you were a cop out there and you see this fucking deliverin' pizza...

575
00:15:37,000 --> 00:15:38,000
Mike and us?

576
00:15:38,000 --> 00:15:39,000
No.

577
00:15:39,000 --> 00:15:40,000
Yeah, pull this ass over.

578
00:15:40,000 --> 00:15:41,000
Well, here's the deal.

579
00:15:41,000 --> 00:15:42,000
They get you with the questions.

580
00:15:42,000 --> 00:15:44,000
So you know why I pulled you over?

581
00:15:44,000 --> 00:15:45,000
I was speeding?

582
00:15:45,000 --> 00:15:46,000
Yeah.

583
00:15:46,000 --> 00:15:47,000
You were.

584
00:15:47,000 --> 00:15:48,000
There you go.

585
00:15:48,000 --> 00:15:49,000
Oh, was that over the assessment?

586
00:15:49,000 --> 00:15:50,000
Yeah, you did.

587
00:15:50,000 --> 00:15:51,000
Well...

588
00:15:51,000 --> 00:15:52,000
No, I have no idea why you pulled me off.

589
00:15:52,000 --> 00:15:53,000
I said, what's going on here?

590
00:15:53,000 --> 00:15:55,000
You don't give them a reason to give you ticket.

591
00:15:55,000 --> 00:16:00,000
And then they're going to smell the heavily smell of marijuana coming from Antforth and search him.

592
00:16:00,000 --> 00:16:02,000
One time I got pulled over.

593
00:16:02,000 --> 00:16:03,000
Yeah, I'm a block.

594
00:16:03,000 --> 00:16:04,000
I fucking just went...

595
00:16:04,000 --> 00:16:06,000
He didn't smell marijuana from his car.

596
00:16:06,000 --> 00:16:09,000
No, when he walked up to the window and he opened the window.

597
00:16:09,000 --> 00:16:10,000
He can't do that.

598
00:16:10,000 --> 00:16:11,000
He's got to have to read the pulmon over first.

599
00:16:11,000 --> 00:16:12,000
I fucking...

600
00:16:12,000 --> 00:16:13,000
I understand.

601
00:16:13,000 --> 00:16:15,000
I fucking am a block or two from home.

602
00:16:15,000 --> 00:16:18,000
I just picked up two or three jabs.

603
00:16:18,000 --> 00:16:19,000
I'm coming back from the city.

604
00:16:19,000 --> 00:16:22,000
I'm fucking hauling ass.

605
00:16:22,000 --> 00:16:26,000
I'm literally about to turn down to the fucking into my subdivision.

606
00:16:26,000 --> 00:16:27,000
Yeah?

607
00:16:27,000 --> 00:16:28,000
And I get pulled over.

608
00:16:28,000 --> 00:16:29,000
Yeah?

609
00:16:29,000 --> 00:16:31,000
In the cops like you're speeding pretty fast there, buddy.

610
00:16:31,000 --> 00:16:32,000
You know what I mean?

611
00:16:32,000 --> 00:16:33,000
I mean shit, man.

612
00:16:33,000 --> 00:16:34,000
And I'm fucking...

613
00:16:34,000 --> 00:16:37,000
Now I'm nervous because I got a lot of dope on me.

614
00:16:37,000 --> 00:16:39,000
And fucking the guys like...

615
00:16:39,000 --> 00:16:40,000
It actually was a chick.

616
00:16:40,000 --> 00:16:41,000
And she's like...

617
00:16:41,000 --> 00:16:42,000
Actually it was a chick cop?

618
00:16:42,000 --> 00:16:44,000
Yeah, and she's like, you're pretty nervous.

619
00:16:44,000 --> 00:16:45,000
And I'm like...

620
00:16:45,000 --> 00:16:46,000
Yeah, you know...

621
00:16:46,000 --> 00:16:47,000
You have to go to this heroin on me.

622
00:16:47,000 --> 00:16:48,000
Exactly.

623
00:16:48,000 --> 00:16:49,000
I mean, what do you think?

624
00:16:49,000 --> 00:16:50,000
I'm nervous.

625
00:16:50,000 --> 00:16:51,000
I mean...

626
00:16:51,000 --> 00:16:52,000
Fucking hey, man.

627
00:16:52,000 --> 00:16:57,000
No, but I just said to her, yeah, you know, I have a really clean record and I never get pulled over by the cops.

628
00:16:57,000 --> 00:16:59,000
I'm an old man and I'm not used to this shit.

629
00:16:59,000 --> 00:17:00,000
You're scared of him.

630
00:17:00,000 --> 00:17:02,000
And I said, you're freaking me out.

631
00:17:02,000 --> 00:17:03,000
And she said, oh, don't worry.

632
00:17:03,000 --> 00:17:04,000
Everything's fine.

633
00:17:04,000 --> 00:17:06,000
Just be careful and have a nice day.

634
00:17:06,000 --> 00:17:08,000
And I'm like, oh my God.

635
00:17:08,000 --> 00:17:10,000
I almost fucking had a heart attack.

636
00:17:10,000 --> 00:17:11,000
Yeah?

637
00:17:11,000 --> 00:17:13,000
I get home and I tell Mary, holy fuck.

638
00:17:13,000 --> 00:17:14,000
I'm never speeding.

639
00:17:14,000 --> 00:17:18,000
I thought I'm almost home and there's never any cops right around here.

640
00:17:18,000 --> 00:17:19,000
And I just said, fuck it.

641
00:17:19,000 --> 00:17:22,000
And I punched it and said, I'm getting home fast.

642
00:17:22,000 --> 00:17:23,000
So you broke the law?

643
00:17:23,000 --> 00:17:24,000
Yeah.

644
00:17:24,000 --> 00:17:25,000
Okay.

645
00:17:25,000 --> 00:17:27,000
And fucking, and that's how they get you.

646
00:17:27,000 --> 00:17:28,000
Yeah, you break the law.

647
00:17:28,000 --> 00:17:31,000
Because the cops are there for a reason.

648
00:17:31,000 --> 00:17:32,000
Why are they there?

649
00:17:32,000 --> 00:17:34,000
She told you she pulled over speeding.

650
00:17:34,000 --> 00:17:36,000
She could have speeding taken that shit.

651
00:17:36,000 --> 00:17:37,000
She can't have surgery.

652
00:17:37,000 --> 00:17:38,000
She didn't give you a ticket.

653
00:17:38,000 --> 00:17:39,000
Oh, I love you.

654
00:17:39,000 --> 00:17:41,000
I said, I thank you so much.

655
00:17:41,000 --> 00:17:42,000
Yeah, foxhole prayers.

656
00:17:42,000 --> 00:17:44,000
But hey, that's all they are.

657
00:17:44,000 --> 00:17:47,000
Oh, Lord, please don't let them look in my glove box.

658
00:17:47,000 --> 00:17:49,000
Because I got a bunch of dope in there.

659
00:17:49,000 --> 00:17:52,000
No, I didn't even say that because I don't want to say something dumb.

660
00:17:52,000 --> 00:17:55,000
Like, oh, Lord, if they don't find this, I'll never get out.

661
00:17:55,000 --> 00:17:56,000
Yeah, man.

662
00:17:56,000 --> 00:17:58,000
That's what I'm saying.

663
00:17:58,000 --> 00:17:59,000
Foxhole prayers, yeah.

664
00:17:59,000 --> 00:18:00,000
You're never going to do that.

665
00:18:00,000 --> 00:18:02,000
Because I know that's a lie and I'm not going to lie to the Lord.

666
00:18:02,000 --> 00:18:03,000
Another right thing in there.

667
00:18:03,000 --> 00:18:06,000
Just rely on, I rely on luck.

668
00:18:06,000 --> 00:18:07,000
That's luck.

669
00:18:07,000 --> 00:18:10,000
I rely on luck in my fucking books.

670
00:18:10,000 --> 00:18:11,000
There's no such thing as luck?

671
00:18:11,000 --> 00:18:13,000
Luck in, oh my God.

672
00:18:13,000 --> 00:18:14,000
Jesus.

673
00:18:14,000 --> 00:18:17,000
You couldn't even get a loaf of bread with that face.

674
00:18:17,000 --> 00:18:22,000
I was pulled over by some undercover, like, deep undercover guy.

675
00:18:22,000 --> 00:18:25,000
He was so undercover I didn't believe he was a cop.

676
00:18:25,000 --> 00:18:26,000
This is actually how I got out of it.

677
00:18:26,000 --> 00:18:29,000
I was so insistent that he wasn't even a cop.

678
00:18:29,000 --> 00:18:32,000
And he really had no reason to pull me over because I was down on the Diner Road and I

679
00:18:32,000 --> 00:18:34,000
was coming out of the drug place.

680
00:18:34,000 --> 00:18:35,000
Oh, yeah, they were all right.

681
00:18:35,000 --> 00:18:38,000
He didn't have any reasons to pull me over other than the fact that he saw me come out

682
00:18:38,000 --> 00:18:39,000
of that place.

683
00:18:39,000 --> 00:18:40,000
But I was like, right.

684
00:18:40,000 --> 00:18:41,000
And then I insisted.

685
00:18:41,000 --> 00:18:42,000
A deep undercover cop.

686
00:18:42,000 --> 00:18:43,000
I'm like, well, he just pulled me over.

687
00:18:43,000 --> 00:18:44,000
He had the little lights.

688
00:18:44,000 --> 00:18:45,000
He had the little lights.

689
00:18:45,000 --> 00:18:46,000
But he didn't have the lights.

690
00:18:46,000 --> 00:18:47,000
Why did he pull me over, man?

691
00:18:47,000 --> 00:18:48,000
He had the little lights.

692
00:18:48,000 --> 00:18:49,000
And then he had the very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very,

693
00:18:49,000 --> 00:18:55,000
very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very charming.

694
00:18:55,000 --> 00:19:01,000
I tried to look at him, but I can't get that as far as I wanted.

695
00:19:01,000 --> 00:19:02,000
Hardly seen.

696
00:19:02,000 --> 00:19:03,000
He could tell if you pulled me over.

697
00:19:03,000 --> 00:19:05,000
Man, he had little lights, and then he had hardly uniform.

698
00:19:05,000 --> 00:19:06,000
I could get nothing.

699
00:19:06,000 --> 00:19:08,000
And I'm like, dude, you're not even a cop, man.

700
00:19:08,000 --> 00:19:09,000
And then you blew over.

701
00:19:09,000 --> 00:19:10,000
And then he pulled me over before.

702
00:19:10,000 --> 00:19:11,000
Oh no, man.

703
00:19:11,000 --> 00:19:12,000
And whatever.

704
00:19:12,000 --> 00:19:16,000
So he said, well, then he goes, oh, I can't get you.

705
00:19:16,000 --> 00:19:17,000
Now I'm going to get you.

706
00:19:17,000 --> 00:19:18,000
Don't you worry, buddy?

707
00:19:18,000 --> 00:19:21,220
I just I didn't believe it was a cop. I really didn't I mean did not look at the cop at all

708
00:19:21,220 --> 00:19:27,400
Showing any identification. No, I didn't get to that point. I was just like what the fuck are you plies? I did nothing wrong

709
00:19:27,400 --> 00:19:36,400
I was watching

710
00:19:39,120 --> 00:19:41,120
He still can't put it together

711
00:19:41,120 --> 00:19:47,120
Oh

712
00:19:52,120 --> 00:19:54,120
Always getting fucking busted Mike

713
00:19:59,520 --> 00:20:04,480
He's not a cop and drive away who the fuck does that? Okay, I do all right

714
00:20:04,480 --> 00:20:06,480
Shut up listen to me

715
00:20:08,360 --> 00:20:11,100
So what happened now you bust me a year later

716
00:20:16,040 --> 00:20:18,540
He didn't think was a cop busted him a year later

717
00:20:27,480 --> 00:20:30,000
There's the thing that fucking puzzles me again

718
00:20:30,000 --> 00:20:35,000
You had two grams. Yes, I know what a fucking Jew bag you are

719
00:20:37,080 --> 00:20:39,080
And the other thing is

720
00:20:47,040 --> 00:20:49,640
I come back for 20 bucks at a time man

721
00:20:51,520 --> 00:20:55,680
Going to get $20 bags 10 of them. I don't do a lot of

722
00:20:55,680 --> 00:20:58,240
I just do 10 time that would have to later

723
00:20:58,240 --> 00:21:02,760
I did the $100 and the hundred feet then I'd you know, yeah, you progress like a drug addict

724
00:21:02,760 --> 00:21:08,040
All right, like a like a Vegas gambler. I'm not gonna spend all my money. I'm gonna spend it 20 more

725
00:21:08,040 --> 00:21:10,040
No, I'm gonna spend it throughout the whole night, right

726
00:21:10,120 --> 00:21:14,760
I can spend it all in the morning doing a more like I do all this blow it once I'm gonna stretch it out

727
00:21:14,760 --> 00:21:20,760
Yeah, you know keep going to the dealer. I used to just fuck how many rails would you get out of a 20 back?

728
00:21:21,960 --> 00:21:23,160
Oh

729
00:21:23,160 --> 00:21:24,600
Jesus

730
00:21:24,600 --> 00:21:27,920
Fuckin okay, we are okay. All right enough drug talk

731
00:21:28,400 --> 00:21:36,840
Hey, hey, I mean, but that's just a horrible lifestyle. Yeah, and that's why I really

732
00:21:37,360 --> 00:21:39,360
debilitating

733
00:21:42,360 --> 00:21:46,640
And then you want to jail right who me no, I want to do for that. Yeah

734
00:21:46,640 --> 00:21:52,360
Yeah, 30 days I couldn't get down what happened but what something about what the escapades in jail? Oh

735
00:21:55,280 --> 00:21:57,280
Drop the soap on purpose

736
00:22:01,320 --> 00:22:07,560
Crazy county's right. Yeah, County's way crazier than prison. Okay. Yeah, so this this this this this

737
00:22:08,000 --> 00:22:10,000
From what I've heard

738
00:22:10,000 --> 00:22:17,720
Comes in he looks like Mike Tyson only a little shorter. Oh my god. That was a midget and a little meaner. Yeah, but he looks just

739
00:22:18,200 --> 00:22:24,360
Yeah, he had a pension for raping a little bigger, but not quite as tall, you know, but he's definitely he's in for he told us robbery

740
00:22:24,360 --> 00:22:27,000
He was a few blonde hair crack-haired white men and

741
00:22:27,560 --> 00:22:32,440
Anyway, you know they got that orange jumpsuit and shit and you like where with the old with the top down shit

742
00:22:32,440 --> 00:22:36,800
And well, yeah, you have to he looked like he looked like McGillagorilla

743
00:22:36,800 --> 00:22:39,920
His name was McGrath. Oh my god. I'm really

744
00:22:41,760 --> 00:22:48,000
To his face no, yeah, exactly. That's what I thought. Yeah, no, I mean

745
00:22:48,520 --> 00:22:53,560
Just racist behind his back just gotten in and he made himself a little tent underneath those tables

746
00:22:53,560 --> 00:22:55,760
No, and he was laying there. I don't even know

747
00:22:56,600 --> 00:23:02,360
Listen wait for the people at home that haven't been locked in County. It's a fucking like picnic bench with a square

748
00:23:02,360 --> 00:23:09,160
It's just fucking benches and everything's bent bolted to the ground. Yes, everything. You couldn't fucking tear that thing out

749
00:23:12,040 --> 00:23:16,680
And you put a sheet and you can lay like an hammock in there on the ground, but you get your back rest and shit

750
00:23:16,680 --> 00:23:24,040
So there's all these paperwork for classes and D and like a cardboard cut out die-cast cut cards

751
00:23:24,280 --> 00:23:26,280
Just yeah

752
00:23:26,280 --> 00:23:28,280
This

753
00:23:31,720 --> 00:23:35,480
Assholes couldn't come up with flyer so they're all messed up and I cardboard

754
00:23:36,600 --> 00:23:40,440
She said I'm cardboard. I don't know. Yeah, I know you don't know

755
00:23:41,520 --> 00:23:44,160
Looking to read card board. Yeah

756
00:23:45,000 --> 00:23:50,760
I'm straightening them out. Hey, that jacket's getting your head shot off asshole mark. I know I'm sorry

757
00:23:50,760 --> 00:23:55,160
I'm just gonna tape me on tap them down all of a sudden this guy you were tapping them

758
00:23:55,160 --> 00:23:57,160
He was making straightening even

759
00:23:57,800 --> 00:24:04,200
You know you wait so the guy you know he's under the table. Yeah, the get OCD. He's under the table

760
00:24:04,200 --> 00:24:09,520
Okay, so wait a second, but you look gorilla is underneath the table. Oh, you didn't know

761
00:24:09,520 --> 00:24:15,640
I don't know he's there and I'm tapping this thing and he comes flying up out of there. What are you fucking with me?

762
00:24:15,640 --> 00:24:20,080
I'm like, oh my god, and you know it's serious and I've already talked myself out of two fights

763
00:24:20,080 --> 00:24:25,760
And I gotta go to number three, right? He's gonna kill me, you know, you're in the pod

764
00:24:27,160 --> 00:24:30,200
Fucking yeah, and it's rough which is hilarious

765
00:24:30,920 --> 00:24:34,320
It's self how the people yeah, dude, everybody's angry in there

766
00:24:34,320 --> 00:24:41,960
Oh, it's everybody's angry vying for fucking dominance. So anyway, we go back and forth. I'm time explaining my I had no idea

767
00:24:41,960 --> 00:24:44,920
You were there man. Well, I even let you get a word in cuz

768
00:24:44,920 --> 00:24:48,840
Yes, you're able to fucking get your foot once all mark needs his foot in the door. Yeah

769
00:24:48,840 --> 00:24:55,040
I was a silly one. Well, you know, I had something that he wanted then he tells me you gotta give me honey buns

770
00:24:56,560 --> 00:25:03,400
Fucker honey buns, you know, I'm back in my cell. I'm sitting there

771
00:25:04,240 --> 00:25:07,560
And I look at my little bag from the commissary honey buns

772
00:25:09,560 --> 00:25:13,880
And so I'm like McGrath here you want my honey buns

773
00:25:13,880 --> 00:25:16,000
He says yeah, baby, and then he fucked you

774
00:25:19,160 --> 00:25:23,120
They're flying through there he jumps up from the ground on the table

775
00:25:23,360 --> 00:25:28,040
Gribes a honey bun. It says junkman around like precious pop never precious. It's like a gorilla

776
00:25:29,160 --> 00:25:31,000
Never press the cart to the no

777
00:25:31,000 --> 00:25:35,600
Oh dude, you fucking dog would float up into the air give him a tree

778
00:25:35,600 --> 00:25:42,280
Yeah, yeah, yeah, lady gave me a treat to understand like fresh prep

779
00:25:46,040 --> 00:25:48,040
I'm a woman

780
00:25:56,160 --> 00:26:00,240
One day now we're sitting on quiet it finally calms down it's a Sunday afternoon

781
00:26:00,240 --> 00:26:02,240
And

782
00:26:03,720 --> 00:26:08,520
Yeah, yeah, everyone's just reading TV's on soft couple guys are playing checkers in the back

783
00:26:08,520 --> 00:26:15,000
And we're reading their books just eyes and quiet and they bring in these kids the detectors come walking down how these kids

784
00:26:15,000 --> 00:26:19,240
Like scared straight like scared straight and that's what the other guys know this or any of the guys

785
00:26:19,240 --> 00:26:23,920
It was like fun. They said them in front of the fucking cell and we also go crazy

786
00:26:23,920 --> 00:26:30,720
Like oh my god, these kids are ballin fucking ballin man

787
00:26:31,240 --> 00:26:37,200
And they take them out of there and no good job guys right back to silence everyone's quiet reading the books again

788
00:26:40,520 --> 00:26:42,520
That's pretty funny though, it was hilarious

789
00:26:42,520 --> 00:26:46,480
And you were on an episode of scared street. No, no, no, it was different situation

790
00:26:46,480 --> 00:26:47,480
We didn't get to talk to you

791
00:26:47,480 --> 00:26:49,480
Kids in and scare him

792
00:26:49,480 --> 00:26:55,760
They videotaped it. Yeah, no wonder if they video like it like a Sunday afternoon. They caught these kids smoke

793
00:26:55,760 --> 00:26:57,760
So they have somewhere

794
00:26:58,480 --> 00:27:04,280
Fucking you know fucking right scared was on TV. Yeah. Well, they used to have that

795
00:27:04,280 --> 00:27:11,320
Yeah, I remember the same bus in the back. I'm breaking ladies job both for goddamn arms. I see this. Oh, sorry, Mary

796
00:27:13,960 --> 00:27:15,160
I

797
00:27:15,160 --> 00:27:19,720
Jailhouse cooking. Oh, yeah, my wife

798
00:27:21,040 --> 00:27:25,880
You know, you know, you know the bat burritos. Yes, I know yes way the trick is you can't use too much of that

799
00:27:25,880 --> 00:27:29,800
It's very popular right now jailhouse cooking videos. I've ever seen these yes

800
00:27:29,800 --> 00:27:35,360
There are people that sneak phones and shit into jail and cook and then videotape it

801
00:27:36,640 --> 00:27:39,120
I'm being serious. I'm not lying about this

802
00:27:40,520 --> 00:27:42,520
But they make the craziest shit like

803
00:27:42,520 --> 00:27:47,120
It's squeeze cheese. Oh god, I don't like crushed up ramen

804
00:27:47,120 --> 00:27:50,600
We don't know what I was gonna spit it up. No, then I ate one of the fucking burritos, dude

805
00:27:50,600 --> 00:27:55,080
I wanted to drink the soap. I was so awesome. I wanted to drink fucking hope it would loosen me up

806
00:27:55,080 --> 00:27:59,000
Yeah, yeah, this shit is not good for you. The food is horrible. Do it and they get so you just like

807
00:27:59,800 --> 00:28:02,040
If you carbide the car below you

808
00:28:02,840 --> 00:28:09,760
So nobody wants to fight but if you work out heavy duty you get jacked because the diet is fucking

809
00:28:09,760 --> 00:28:16,160
Yeah, work your fucking ass off ever. Yeah, jail's not a fun place. Just when you think you got a control of it

810
00:28:16,160 --> 00:28:19,260
It's gonna be okay something if like it happens, you know, oh, yeah

811
00:28:19,920 --> 00:28:22,560
If you get in a good pod, it's good if you're not a good

812
00:28:22,560 --> 00:28:27,240
Well, I got along better with the with the blacks and Mexicans in the other white people cuz you're okay

813
00:28:27,240 --> 00:28:30,440
Yeah, you know the whites were the most annoying ones there actually

814
00:28:31,080 --> 00:28:35,200
Well, my wife was a public defender for many years as you all know my wife

815
00:28:35,200 --> 00:28:41,040
My life in Chicago, Illinois and Cook County the fucking

816
00:28:41,600 --> 00:28:45,400
Public defender in the worst part fucking up Harrison and Kedzie

817
00:28:46,400 --> 00:28:48,080
fucking

818
00:28:48,080 --> 00:28:54,160
Garfield and fucking up. What was the other one of them? She worked at all of them. Yeah, literally three blocks away

819
00:28:54,160 --> 00:29:00,720
Wait, I don't mean to interrupt you but three blocks away from the police station had the highest murder rate in the city at one point

820
00:29:01,160 --> 00:29:04,720
Harrison and Kedzie leave you partying and she had to go straight to work sometimes

821
00:29:04,720 --> 00:29:06,720
Well, here's the part I want to say

822
00:29:07,160 --> 00:29:15,360
Spirit I want to say is a lot of these brothers would be getting like two three four five years

823
00:29:15,720 --> 00:29:20,320
And they'd be like, thank you. Thank you, you know, or my wife would get them off

824
00:29:20,520 --> 00:29:27,840
Get them out of their fucking case or whatever and then she for the last tail end of her fucking career right before she

825
00:29:27,840 --> 00:29:33,720
Retired she went to the fucking into rolling ghettos and fucking

826
00:29:34,680 --> 00:29:39,720
Into the wider fucking area and once the people would get like, you know

827
00:29:40,800 --> 00:29:43,720
Guys would get repeated DUIs and maybe get like

828
00:29:44,160 --> 00:29:47,680
Defenders, yeah, repeat offenders. Yeah, these people that were not there in the scouts of the earth

829
00:29:47,680 --> 00:29:50,080
But it would be but it would be like, you know

830
00:29:50,440 --> 00:29:55,520
Short time it wouldn't even be as much time as the black brothers would be getting the black brothers

831
00:29:55,520 --> 00:29:58,400
I'll know you're also a lot of Lika with them. Yeah, and fucking

832
00:30:00,440 --> 00:30:02,440
Exactly

833
00:30:02,840 --> 00:30:04,840
That's Peewee Herman

834
00:30:05,560 --> 00:30:08,560
That's me and fucking and

835
00:30:08,880 --> 00:30:14,100
A couple of white boys would get fucking a couple of months and they'd be crying and

836
00:30:18,440 --> 00:30:21,680
And the brothers would just be getting fucking ten years

837
00:30:21,680 --> 00:30:25,200
Okay, yeah, yeah, no fucking thing. I

838
00:30:26,440 --> 00:30:30,720
Was crazy, you know, she said the contrast but a horrible life to live

839
00:30:32,080 --> 00:30:34,080
Prison

840
00:30:38,640 --> 00:30:41,240
Country Club of Jails to because it's always rotating

841
00:30:41,240 --> 00:30:43,240
Oh

842
00:30:50,680 --> 00:30:52,680
One toilet

843
00:30:53,960 --> 00:30:55,960
Fucking the hundred dudes in there

844
00:30:58,360 --> 00:31:04,080
And the one time I was one the lucky if you can even do so literally everybody had to stand

845
00:31:05,720 --> 00:31:09,680
People are gonna fight to down from the shower. It was nice. It was nice

846
00:31:09,680 --> 00:31:13,120
I'm pretty so you the television you can actually hear it with the door shut

847
00:31:15,320 --> 00:31:18,200
It was pretty nice and I would fuck with the guard for the little

848
00:31:18,960 --> 00:31:25,160
Thing, you know, I want to espresso. Oh, we had a the little cups of orange juice, you know

849
00:31:25,160 --> 00:31:27,760
Okay, and you can instant coffee from commissary. Yes

850
00:31:27,760 --> 00:31:32,120
We saved the cups because then if you really heat up the water from the sink

851
00:31:32,120 --> 00:31:40,360
You can make the coffee, but your whole coffee is awful. Yeah, we have a spresso's and you know, spresso's

852
00:31:41,120 --> 00:31:44,080
Guys couldn't believe it. They were like, what the fuck's going on here?

853
00:31:45,080 --> 00:31:48,600
You're gonna cook you might as well try to figure things out your stock there, right?

854
00:31:49,400 --> 00:31:52,600
But the problem is is once you leave yourself in your no man's land

855
00:31:55,160 --> 00:31:57,160
Makes my spresso market

856
00:31:57,160 --> 00:31:59,160
Here

857
00:32:01,320 --> 00:32:06,760
You do something that you're worth you only have to be worth full jail you can't just go in there being a schlub

858
00:32:06,760 --> 00:32:09,720
No, right if you got no skills no value

859
00:32:14,520 --> 00:32:17,960
We call the chicken salt you're gonna be a past around

860
00:32:17,960 --> 00:32:24,920
Yeah, you're gonna get a few four fucking noon. I told you you're not gonna need this chicken salt with the crust of potato chips

861
00:32:24,920 --> 00:32:29,480
You won't need any other believe it just put the noodles in and the chips will be fine

862
00:32:34,280 --> 00:32:39,160
I don't like that shit at all. I don't like crush ramen like I said, I don't want to fuck no

863
00:32:39,160 --> 00:32:43,160
It's horrible. It's not even good. I'm mad some fucking ramen when we're done with this podcast

864
00:32:43,920 --> 00:32:45,920
Are you doing Frank?

865
00:32:45,920 --> 00:32:47,200
Oh

866
00:32:47,200 --> 00:32:55,040
Good brother. Yeah, it's quiet weird when I first got in I was with some black kid and come across the scroll on the cable

867
00:32:55,040 --> 00:33:00,240
You know that little yeah, you fucking ticker. It said to hell do page kind of largest drug bust

868
00:33:01,120 --> 00:33:04,880
Hey, we're gonna let's work this you know, I say to the kids again

869
00:33:05,360 --> 00:33:08,560
So what are you for what are you for? Well drugs?

870
00:33:09,200 --> 00:33:13,520
Drugs, how much did you have they're gonna ask me like I get there for a couple days, you know

871
00:33:13,520 --> 00:33:20,160
Oh, wait you pretended to be somebody else. Well said to hell and do paste kind of large. Yeah, but you don't want to pretend to check your papers

872
00:33:20,880 --> 00:33:22,880
Dude, they check your papers

873
00:33:22,880 --> 00:33:26,160
Dude, I was pretty anything to ask me when I was in for drugs. I was in for drugs

874
00:33:26,160 --> 00:33:30,640
Well, you get so mad because I wasn't pretending Mike. They didn't know I knew if there was a drug

875
00:33:30,640 --> 00:33:35,280
I wasn't pretending nothing what happened though was the kid that I came in with they found out

876
00:33:35,840 --> 00:33:37,840
He told me this is for fake ID

877
00:33:37,840 --> 00:33:42,480
Okay, so that I knew if they think anything we're not the two drug dealers anymore. You know what I'm saying

878
00:33:42,480 --> 00:33:46,880
I knew my my little well the one to see your paperwork when you get in the positive

879
00:33:47,520 --> 00:33:50,320
To make sure you're not a pedophile to make sure you're not a snitch

880
00:33:52,160 --> 00:33:57,200
You don't have paperwork when you get processed everybody has paper you don't go under your pod with anything

881
00:33:58,640 --> 00:34:02,800
See your paperwork. Let me leave her file with you when you walk into the fucking pot

882
00:34:03,680 --> 00:34:07,600
No, in county. They'll give you your paperwork you take with you when they see your intake paperwork

883
00:34:07,600 --> 00:34:12,800
I didn't take paperwork other prisoners don't get to see that

884
00:34:12,800 --> 00:34:15,280
If they fucking want to give you a physical copy

885
00:34:16,160 --> 00:34:20,400
Yeah, they did not give me a copy of anything to walk into the fucking cell with anything on it said anything

886
00:34:20,400 --> 00:34:22,320
I've done or did ever

887
00:34:22,320 --> 00:34:24,560
What the fuck are you talking about dude? Okay?

888
00:34:26,640 --> 00:34:31,600
Okay, my buddy Chris told me who was the bank robber who fucking committed suicide

889
00:34:31,600 --> 00:34:33,360
They might be able to find out what you've done

890
00:34:33,360 --> 00:34:39,360
But he said you better produce your paperwork within a day or two because they want to see

891
00:34:39,360 --> 00:34:43,680
Okay, he robbed the bank went to prison. Yes. I was in do page county jail

892
00:34:44,240 --> 00:34:47,360
Really think they give you fucking paperwork to you went to prison

893
00:34:48,320 --> 00:34:53,840
And that might be a different fucking scenario. Check your fucking paperwork, man. Check your head, bitch

894
00:34:55,760 --> 00:34:58,880
Get so fired up because you're wrong. Do you okay?

895
00:34:58,880 --> 00:35:03,040
All right. You guys trying to make me wrong. I'm not trying to make you wrong

896
00:35:03,040 --> 00:35:05,040
You are you are and I don't like

897
00:35:05,280 --> 00:35:10,240
Especially when I know I'm right or I know what happened when I know what it is when I know the truth

898
00:35:10,640 --> 00:35:12,640
Okay, the truth is out there

899
00:35:13,120 --> 00:35:17,280
You just have to find it, brother. You won't let me reveal it. I'm gonna get upset about that

900
00:35:20,880 --> 00:35:23,680
There's no paperwork and I wasn't trying to I didn't say oh, yeah

901
00:35:23,840 --> 00:35:28,960
I'm that guy the world's two page county flourished drug was me and him. I just asked you exactly

902
00:35:28,960 --> 00:35:30,960
I did not say that

903
00:35:30,960 --> 00:35:32,960
You guys ever hear about chopper?

904
00:35:32,960 --> 00:35:38,320
Yeah, I didn't say that. They said what do you infer I just said drugs

905
00:35:38,880 --> 00:35:43,840
Okay, hey, you ever hear of lies and renelling? Yeah, you look like that's your new band

906
00:35:44,880 --> 00:35:46,880
You just do lies and renelly too

907
00:35:47,600 --> 00:35:52,960
So for a split second they said too held and they thought me and this guy were those two people

908
00:35:52,960 --> 00:35:54,960
Oh

909
00:36:00,320 --> 00:36:02,320
Well that sucks right

910
00:36:02,880 --> 00:36:04,880
Well, I had a crack rock in my ass

911
00:36:06,480 --> 00:36:08,480
You didn't mention that right

912
00:36:09,840 --> 00:36:11,840
Sounds like a blues album

913
00:36:13,840 --> 00:36:18,240
I might be locked up but I got a crack rock in my ass. Yeah, how are you gonna smoke?

914
00:36:18,240 --> 00:36:22,240
Yes, yes, you know the car. Oh, that's two page county's

915
00:36:22,240 --> 00:36:24,240
They didn't get this god

916
00:36:25,200 --> 00:36:29,760
Being ever ever rock with no pipe or no chore and you're locked in county

917
00:36:31,200 --> 00:36:35,760
Oh my god people die from dreams like that. So finally it's a week or two. I can put a library

918
00:36:36,080 --> 00:36:38,960
I go to the library. I'm not it. I'm looking at books in the library

919
00:36:39,360 --> 00:36:43,680
Putting your ass. No, I'm looking at books in the library or anything and there's a folded up piece. It's in for all

920
00:36:43,680 --> 00:36:49,840
Oh, Jesus man. No kidding. I'm not kidding. Yeah, so I take the book here. I mean fuck. I need this foil

921
00:36:50,000 --> 00:36:53,120
I need this book. It's all coming together like a clue

922
00:36:53,840 --> 00:36:58,400
Enforced in the prison cell. So now we got foil crack. Yeah

923
00:37:00,080 --> 00:37:03,840
How are we gonna light this bitch up mother? You got no receptacles. What are we gonna do?

924
00:37:03,920 --> 00:37:08,160
And you can't burn fucking toilet paper. How are you gonna do this? And?

925
00:37:08,880 --> 00:37:10,560
You get a paper clip

926
00:37:10,560 --> 00:37:14,800
Put it in the fucking outlet. Yeah, you know this that heats up and you put your fucking crack by the way

927
00:37:15,360 --> 00:37:17,360
Jesus

928
00:37:17,440 --> 00:37:23,840
Yeah, but there's no receptacles in the prison cells and they're in the county in two places. I didn't have any crack by the tail jail, dude

929
00:37:26,320 --> 00:37:30,800
I love it. That was a great story. Why are you lying? Why are you lying? Very good. I was like damn

930
00:37:30,800 --> 00:37:36,480
I'll be coming to you later in a while and you are so whatever you ask, he's like I'm not not now

931
00:37:36,480 --> 00:37:39,680
I mean honey, you are. Yeah

932
00:37:40,560 --> 00:37:45,040
That was very good Enforced. I like that. You're in a good mood today. He got all mad too. Did you see that?

933
00:37:45,440 --> 00:37:47,440
Over a fake story

934
00:37:47,600 --> 00:37:49,600
That wasn't a fake story

935
00:37:49,680 --> 00:37:52,160
That's true. The cracker got my ass wasn't but

936
00:37:54,880 --> 00:37:56,880
And he didn't find the foil

937
00:37:57,040 --> 00:37:59,520
No, I did find the foil. I did find the thing of foil. I traded that

938
00:38:00,240 --> 00:38:03,040
Traded that for what? I can't remember. Somebody else wanted it

939
00:38:03,040 --> 00:38:05,040
Back to Honeybunts and keep McGillip from fucking them

940
00:38:05,040 --> 00:38:07,040
I'm just kidding. Pretty much

941
00:38:07,040 --> 00:38:09,040
The honeybunts and his ass

942
00:38:09,040 --> 00:38:11,920
They swiveled me out of my bible. I had a King James bible

943
00:38:11,920 --> 00:38:14,800
Somehow I was able to get a King James bible

944
00:38:15,760 --> 00:38:17,760
Yeah, apparently it was I guess it was

945
00:38:17,760 --> 00:38:19,600
That's what you want

946
00:38:19,600 --> 00:38:21,600
Right, and I don't realize this every time

947
00:38:21,600 --> 00:38:25,600
Oh, because it was a bible study and the guy's bible, he was going off to prison

948
00:38:25,600 --> 00:38:28,800
He had a new version and it didn't match up to the

949
00:38:28,800 --> 00:38:35,120
Peter's bible, you know what I mean? Because he was a bible for King James and he suggested that he get a King James bible

950
00:38:35,120 --> 00:38:38,480
The guy's in Connie fucking jail and he goes, oh you should get a King James bible

951
00:38:38,480 --> 00:38:40,480
And sure enough, all of my

952
00:38:40,480 --> 00:38:43,840
Right, but his guy in his pot happens to have a King James fucking bible

953
00:38:43,840 --> 00:38:44,800
He turned to Muslim

954
00:38:44,800 --> 00:38:48,480
He's going to prison so I traded him bibles. That's why I wound up with that bible

955
00:38:48,480 --> 00:38:49,280
Traded him bibles?

956
00:38:49,280 --> 00:38:50,080
Yeah man

957
00:38:50,080 --> 00:38:52,080
Only in fucking jail trading bibles

958
00:38:52,080 --> 00:38:52,580
Right

959
00:38:52,580 --> 00:38:53,280
Yeah

960
00:38:53,280 --> 00:38:55,280
You know, where else would you trade the bible?

961
00:38:55,280 --> 00:38:57,280
They'd say Jesus is man

962
00:38:57,280 --> 00:38:59,280
Jesus is found to get a lighter sentence

963
00:39:00,560 --> 00:39:02,560
Jesus lives in prison

964
00:39:03,760 --> 00:39:05,760
He's a warden

965
00:39:05,760 --> 00:39:06,800
No, he's not a warden

966
00:39:06,800 --> 00:39:08,160
Jesus is a warden of us all

967
00:39:08,160 --> 00:39:10,320
He's in the fucking cell with us man

968
00:39:10,320 --> 00:39:12,000
It was so hot it was like torches dude

969
00:39:12,000 --> 00:39:12,880
God is our warden

970
00:39:12,880 --> 00:39:16,400
We were complaining it was so hot, it was incredibly hot, it was literally hot

971
00:39:16,880 --> 00:39:18,880
I mean we couldn't even sleep but it was so hot

972
00:39:18,880 --> 00:39:19,680
Horribly hot

973
00:39:19,680 --> 00:39:20,320
Jail

974
00:39:20,320 --> 00:39:22,960
And you said could you turn on the air, could you just never breathe?

975
00:39:22,960 --> 00:39:25,920
So he had his roommate Phantom with some old natural geographic

976
00:39:25,920 --> 00:39:27,920
Hey Micaela could you fan me with those small bags?

977
00:39:27,920 --> 00:39:29,600
Yeah, I got my money back

978
00:39:29,600 --> 00:39:30,240
I'm short enough

979
00:39:30,240 --> 00:39:30,960
Don't worry man

980
00:39:30,960 --> 00:39:32,960
He's like make the noise too

981
00:39:32,960 --> 00:39:34,960
There's the cover

982
00:39:37,360 --> 00:39:39,360
Which is hilarious, what time are we at?

983
00:39:39,360 --> 00:39:40,560
Make the noise bitch

984
00:39:40,560 --> 00:39:41,040
Yeah

985
00:39:41,040 --> 00:39:43,040
Oh man, you gotta squeal

986
00:39:44,560 --> 00:39:46,560
You know what time it is?

987
00:39:46,560 --> 00:39:47,760
What time is it?

988
00:39:47,760 --> 00:39:49,760
It's the time for

989
00:39:49,760 --> 00:39:51,760
What's a cookie for 100?

990
00:39:51,760 --> 00:39:53,760
What's a cookie for 100?

991
00:39:53,760 --> 00:39:56,080
Man

992
00:39:57,280 --> 00:40:00,480
So Frank was all fucking gung-ho at the beginning of this

993
00:40:00,480 --> 00:40:02,480
ringing the fucking chai

994
00:40:02,480 --> 00:40:04,480
But that is what you want to hit the gong next?

995
00:40:04,480 --> 00:40:05,600
Well that's finally hit it gong

996
00:40:05,600 --> 00:40:06,880
No you do just once

997
00:40:06,880 --> 00:40:09,440
That's the interesting point about the county jail system

998
00:40:09,440 --> 00:40:10,720
What's that?

999
00:40:10,720 --> 00:40:13,920
You know they got the orange jumpsuits and the green jumpsuits

1000
00:40:14,560 --> 00:40:16,560
No prisons I mean privatized sorry

1001
00:40:16,560 --> 00:40:18,240
Well yeah that's great but whatever

1002
00:40:18,240 --> 00:40:20,880
You know what I mean they got the green jumpsuits and the orange jumpsuits

1003
00:40:20,880 --> 00:40:22,640
So I'm in the orange jumpsuit you know

1004
00:40:22,640 --> 00:40:23,120
Yeah

1005
00:40:23,120 --> 00:40:26,080
I go past the green jumpsuit area and it's all just

1006
00:40:26,080 --> 00:40:28,080
Oranges in new black you know

1007
00:40:28,080 --> 00:40:29,520
Yeah that means he wants to play

1008
00:40:29,520 --> 00:40:34,080
And they're all in the green suits and they're in a big long room with bunk beds you know

1009
00:40:34,080 --> 00:40:35,840
The green suits are graduates

1010
00:40:35,840 --> 00:40:37,760
Thank god I'm not in there you know that must be a real

1011
00:40:37,760 --> 00:40:38,400
A dorm

1012
00:40:38,400 --> 00:40:39,440
A zoo in that place

1013
00:40:39,440 --> 00:40:41,280
Yeah the dorm's right that was the low fucking level

1014
00:40:41,280 --> 00:40:45,840
Couple other dudes right so thank god I got church of felony because I got you know private room and shit

1015
00:40:45,840 --> 00:40:46,400
Yeah

1016
00:40:46,400 --> 00:40:47,440
With a bunch of killers

1017
00:40:47,440 --> 00:40:48,000
You know

1018
00:40:48,000 --> 00:40:49,280
That are used for fun

1019
00:40:49,280 --> 00:40:51,680
Right so so so okay yeah whatever

1020
00:40:51,680 --> 00:40:52,800
I mean

1021
00:40:52,800 --> 00:40:54,480
So I get out

1022
00:40:54,480 --> 00:40:56,960
I get out I move I get with this guy

1023
00:40:56,960 --> 00:40:58,160
Moving with a new roommate

1024
00:40:58,160 --> 00:40:59,200
To move in with a new dude

1025
00:40:59,200 --> 00:41:00,720
And he's got a new dude for some time

1026
00:41:01,600 --> 00:41:04,880
But he only did he wasn't a felony he just had regular DUI time

1027
00:41:04,880 --> 00:41:06,720
He was in the green jumpsuit you know what I mean

1028
00:41:06,720 --> 00:41:07,280
Yeah

1029
00:41:07,280 --> 00:41:09,280
So we're talking and he's sitting there

1030
00:41:09,280 --> 00:41:11,280
He says hey they had orange jumpsuits

1031
00:41:11,280 --> 00:41:11,760
Sweet

1032
00:41:11,760 --> 00:41:13,280
It looks good on you nice hat

1033
00:41:13,280 --> 00:41:16,880
And here I am thinking god thank god I'm not down there with those guys in the green jumpsuits

1034
00:41:16,880 --> 00:41:17,760
He's got a new outfit on there

1035
00:41:17,760 --> 00:41:18,240
Oh

1036
00:41:18,240 --> 00:41:21,600
And he comes home going man I'm so glad I was upstairs with those guys in the orange jumpsuits

1037
00:41:21,600 --> 00:41:22,160
Yeah

1038
00:41:22,160 --> 00:41:23,200
It must be awful up there

1039
00:41:23,200 --> 00:41:24,240
Yeah yeah yeah

1040
00:41:24,240 --> 00:41:25,120
Oh for sure

1041
00:41:25,120 --> 00:41:26,240
Yeah nobody wants to fucking

1042
00:41:26,240 --> 00:41:26,400
Right

1043
00:41:26,400 --> 00:41:28,080
The green jumpsuits don't want to fuck around

1044
00:41:28,080 --> 00:41:30,080
The orange jumpsuits don't want to fuck around

1045
00:41:30,080 --> 00:41:30,720
Oh yeah

1046
00:41:30,720 --> 00:41:31,680
As long as you're not around

1047
00:41:31,680 --> 00:41:32,160
In a bag

1048
00:41:32,160 --> 00:41:33,760
You're fucking trying to be on bad

1049
00:41:33,760 --> 00:41:35,840
Okay since I don't remember where we left off

1050
00:41:35,840 --> 00:41:37,040
Nah man we gotta start marking on it

1051
00:41:37,040 --> 00:41:38,320
I might have to read too

1052
00:41:39,360 --> 00:41:41,680
Well you might remember if I read this one

1053
00:41:41,680 --> 00:41:42,640
Fat chance

1054
00:41:42,640 --> 00:41:46,240
Before the beginning of great brilliance

1055
00:41:46,240 --> 00:41:47,680
There must be chaos

1056
00:41:47,680 --> 00:41:48,880
Okay we haven't read that one

1057
00:41:48,880 --> 00:41:49,440
No

1058
00:41:49,440 --> 00:41:51,600
What was the one before it?

1059
00:41:51,600 --> 00:41:52,480
Uh

1060
00:41:52,480 --> 00:41:54,960
Big fortune will descend upon you this year

1061
00:41:54,960 --> 00:41:55,600
We read that one

1062
00:41:55,600 --> 00:41:56,480
No fortune

1063
00:41:56,480 --> 00:41:57,200
You're gonna read that one

1064
00:41:57,200 --> 00:41:59,040
Big fortune will descend upon you this year

1065
00:41:59,040 --> 00:42:00,320
Man there you're killing us

1066
00:42:00,320 --> 00:42:02,240
We're doing two today all right that's fine

1067
00:42:02,240 --> 00:42:04,880
Okay first big fortune will descend upon you this year

1068
00:42:04,880 --> 00:42:08,080
Well it's December so fuck you fortune cookie

1069
00:42:08,080 --> 00:42:09,520
Where'd you get all these fortunes?

1070
00:42:09,520 --> 00:42:10,960
Well it might be from

1071
00:42:10,960 --> 00:42:12,480
Meadening 2024

1072
00:42:13,760 --> 00:42:14,960
Yeah but this year's over

1073
00:42:14,960 --> 00:42:15,520
Over

1074
00:42:15,520 --> 00:42:16,640
Well that's true could be

1075
00:42:16,640 --> 00:42:17,840
It is a fortune cookie

1076
00:42:17,840 --> 00:42:20,960
Yeah it could mean like the next year by next December

1077
00:42:20,960 --> 00:42:22,160
Yeah it could be

1078
00:42:22,160 --> 00:42:23,840
And then the other one I said

1079
00:42:24,880 --> 00:42:27,280
Before the beginning of great brilliance

1080
00:42:27,280 --> 00:42:28,720
There must be chaos

1081
00:42:28,720 --> 00:42:30,080
Fortune cookie 500

1082
00:42:30,080 --> 00:42:31,520
Fortune cookie 500

1083
00:42:31,520 --> 00:42:32,560
Listen to the round eye

1084
00:42:32,560 --> 00:42:33,280
Another saying

1085
00:42:33,280 --> 00:42:34,880
So I mean no

1086
00:42:34,880 --> 00:42:37,040
Thank you for listening to fortune cookie 500

1087
00:42:37,600 --> 00:42:38,560
Danforth hit it

1088
00:42:38,560 --> 00:42:39,280
Give it to Danforth

1089
00:42:39,280 --> 00:42:40,320
Let Donnie Danforth hit it

1090
00:42:40,320 --> 00:42:40,880
Oh okay

1091
00:42:40,880 --> 00:42:42,080
Oh okay

1092
00:42:42,080 --> 00:42:43,200
Look out Frank

1093
00:42:43,200 --> 00:42:44,800
I'll take it for a hundred for me

1094
00:42:44,800 --> 00:42:45,440
Oh hard

1095
00:42:46,240 --> 00:42:46,800
One more time

1096
00:42:46,800 --> 00:42:47,920
Walking again

1097
00:42:50,080 --> 00:42:52,640
See we bring out the racism in everybody

1098
00:42:52,640 --> 00:42:53,440
Seriously

1099
00:42:53,440 --> 00:42:54,480
It's fun to ring it

1100
00:42:55,840 --> 00:42:56,880
They're showing the banger

1101
00:42:56,880 --> 00:42:57,600
He's on

1102
00:42:57,600 --> 00:42:59,440
He says oh kung fu

1103
00:42:59,440 --> 00:43:00,400
Who says that?

1104
00:43:00,400 --> 00:43:02,720
It's like the worst racist thing ever

1105
00:43:02,720 --> 00:43:03,600
A banger gong

1106
00:43:04,480 --> 00:43:05,200
Get it on

1107
00:43:05,200 --> 00:43:06,080
Kung fu is good

1108
00:43:06,080 --> 00:43:06,880
There's the one with the

1109
00:43:06,880 --> 00:43:10,000
So I mean technically there is chaos before every storm

1110
00:43:10,000 --> 00:43:10,160
Right

1111
00:43:10,160 --> 00:43:10,480
Yeah

1112
00:43:11,680 --> 00:43:12,080
Yeah

1113
00:43:12,080 --> 00:43:13,840
That's what they said the chaos before

1114
00:43:13,840 --> 00:43:16,560
No they said before brilliance serves chaos

1115
00:43:16,560 --> 00:43:17,360
Yeah they said

1116
00:43:17,360 --> 00:43:18,560
Okay so there's always

1117
00:43:18,560 --> 00:43:19,600
But there's chaos before anything

1118
00:43:19,600 --> 00:43:20,880
How about the kung fu though

1119
00:43:20,880 --> 00:43:23,840
When he has to pick up the fucking hot boiling pot

1120
00:43:24,480 --> 00:43:26,720
And then one side is dragging

1121
00:43:26,720 --> 00:43:29,360
And on the other side is a fucking

1122
00:43:29,360 --> 00:43:30,880
Maybe it's another dragon

1123
00:43:30,880 --> 00:43:31,200
How about

1124
00:43:31,200 --> 00:43:33,120
And he picks it up with his forearms

1125
00:43:35,200 --> 00:43:38,560
And singes the pictures of the dragons

1126
00:43:38,560 --> 00:43:39,760
Into his arms

1127
00:43:40,400 --> 00:43:41,840
And then runs outside

1128
00:43:42,960 --> 00:43:44,080
And puts him in the snow

1129
00:43:44,080 --> 00:43:44,560
Yeah

1130
00:43:44,560 --> 00:43:45,280
He gets branded

1131
00:43:45,280 --> 00:43:49,120
And he's got the branding for the fucking intricate dragon tail too

1132
00:43:49,120 --> 00:43:51,280
Like in the kung fu masters like very good job

1133
00:43:51,280 --> 00:43:53,280
That'd be funny if it was two fortune cookies

1134
00:43:54,720 --> 00:43:55,680
Two aggro's

1135
00:43:55,680 --> 00:43:57,360
One side is a lucky number

1136
00:43:57,360 --> 00:43:57,680
Yeah

1137
00:43:57,680 --> 00:43:58,400
36

1138
00:43:59,280 --> 00:44:00,080
49

1139
00:44:00,080 --> 00:44:01,760
The other side is the other

1140
00:44:01,760 --> 00:44:02,880
It's just two fortunes

1141
00:44:02,880 --> 00:44:03,680
That's what we deliver

1142
00:44:04,720 --> 00:44:05,520
You got the menu

1143
00:44:06,720 --> 00:44:07,920
That's how they work in America

1144
00:44:07,920 --> 00:44:10,160
I have a number 47

1145
00:44:10,160 --> 00:44:11,360
And I have a number nine

1146
00:44:11,360 --> 00:44:12,240
It's on your back

1147
00:44:12,240 --> 00:44:13,680
That's how it's all the way around

1148
00:44:13,680 --> 00:44:15,120
We deliver we

1149
00:44:16,240 --> 00:44:17,600
I bring you a delivery

1150
00:44:17,600 --> 00:44:18,400
Can I get a bruise?

1151
00:44:18,960 --> 00:44:19,200
Yeah

1152
00:44:19,920 --> 00:44:20,720
Thank you, Valeri

1153
00:44:24,880 --> 00:44:27,520
So Frank, man, he could really fucking put him away

1154
00:44:29,120 --> 00:44:30,880
So I got another

1155
00:44:32,080 --> 00:44:32,880
What's More Gay

1156
00:44:33,600 --> 00:44:34,480
What's More Gay

1157
00:44:35,120 --> 00:44:37,040
What's More Gay

1158
00:44:37,040 --> 00:44:38,320
Welcome to the new game show

1159
00:44:38,320 --> 00:44:38,880
What's More Gay

1160
00:44:38,880 --> 00:44:39,440
What's More Gay

1161
00:44:39,440 --> 00:44:40,560
With Valeri and Nino

1162
00:44:40,560 --> 00:44:41,440
What's More Gay

1163
00:44:41,440 --> 00:44:42,560
Prison sex or purple hair

1164
00:44:42,560 --> 00:44:43,360
Wow

1165
00:44:43,360 --> 00:44:44,880
Oh, I stumped down

1166
00:44:44,880 --> 00:44:46,080
Man, you know, I mean

1167
00:44:46,080 --> 00:44:47,280
I stumped down and forth

1168
00:44:47,280 --> 00:44:49,280
Well, prison sex might not necessarily

1169
00:44:49,280 --> 00:44:50,720
I mean, it's always gay sex as opposed

1170
00:44:50,720 --> 00:44:53,040
But the men that really between two homosexuals

1171
00:44:53,040 --> 00:44:53,680
Right

1172
00:44:53,680 --> 00:44:55,040
Hopefully they're consenting

1173
00:44:55,040 --> 00:44:56,480
So one more gay

1174
00:44:56,480 --> 00:44:57,920
I was gonna say prison rape

1175
00:44:57,920 --> 00:44:58,800
But that's just too

1176
00:44:58,800 --> 00:44:59,440
That's just the whole gay sex

1177
00:44:59,440 --> 00:45:01,680
Prison rape, it might not be gay sex

1178
00:45:01,680 --> 00:45:02,720
It's low hanging fruit

1179
00:45:02,720 --> 00:45:03,680
So what's more gay

1180
00:45:03,680 --> 00:45:04,720
Prison sex is gay sex

1181
00:45:04,720 --> 00:45:05,760
Prison sex is gay sex

1182
00:45:05,760 --> 00:45:06,800
Prison sex is gay sex

1183
00:45:06,800 --> 00:45:07,760
Prison sex is gay sex

1184
00:45:07,760 --> 00:45:08,800
Prison sex is gay sex

1185
00:45:08,800 --> 00:45:09,760
Prison sex is gay sex

1186
00:45:09,760 --> 00:45:10,720
It's low hanging fruit

1187
00:45:10,720 --> 00:45:12,160
So for gay, I'd have to say purple hair

1188
00:45:13,200 --> 00:45:13,840
Honestly

1189
00:45:13,840 --> 00:45:15,760
I would probably say purple hair too

1190
00:45:15,760 --> 00:45:16,400
Honestly, yeah

1191
00:45:16,400 --> 00:45:17,760
I think purple hair is more gay than

1192
00:45:18,640 --> 00:45:19,760
Prison sex

1193
00:45:19,760 --> 00:45:20,880
Because I mean prison sex

1194
00:45:20,880 --> 00:45:22,320
Prison sex, if you're in prison sex

1195
00:45:22,320 --> 00:45:23,040
Well, I mean, yes

1196
00:45:23,040 --> 00:45:24,160
If they're consenting and they're both of them

1197
00:45:24,160 --> 00:45:25,680
Oh my god, the other night

1198
00:45:25,680 --> 00:45:27,040
The guy downstairs for me

1199
00:45:27,040 --> 00:45:28,560
I think they're having gay sex downstairs

1200
00:45:28,560 --> 00:45:29,760
Oh, no

1201
00:45:29,760 --> 00:45:31,040
Oh, Mike Granted

1202
00:45:31,040 --> 00:45:32,160
What do you mean, oh my

1203
00:45:32,160 --> 00:45:35,360
Don't say those words before that sex

1204
00:45:35,360 --> 00:45:36,800
And I couldn't hear any girl, you know what I mean

1205
00:45:37,360 --> 00:45:39,360
I didn't hear, it was just all of him

1206
00:45:39,360 --> 00:45:40,160
I mean, oh my god

1207
00:45:40,160 --> 00:45:40,960
I mean, do you know who your neighbors are?

1208
00:45:40,960 --> 00:45:43,760
If he's fucking someone, this guy would be awful for them

1209
00:45:43,760 --> 00:45:44,880
Both awful for you too

1210
00:45:44,880 --> 00:45:45,680
Because you gotta be

1211
00:45:45,680 --> 00:45:46,560
You gotta be fucking shit

1212
00:45:46,560 --> 00:45:47,280
You gotta enjoy it

1213
00:45:47,280 --> 00:45:47,760
Right

1214
00:45:47,760 --> 00:45:49,760
Listen, you're not a consenting person

1215
00:45:49,760 --> 00:45:51,360
You should call the cops on that

1216
00:45:51,360 --> 00:45:52,160
He was fucking online

1217
00:45:52,160 --> 00:45:52,960
I hit a bus

1218
00:45:52,960 --> 00:45:54,640
I'm stomping around on the bus

1219
00:45:54,640 --> 00:45:57,280
Well, he's trying to break up gay sex

1220
00:45:57,280 --> 00:45:58,880
It's like far from you in the morning

1221
00:45:58,880 --> 00:45:59,520
They're like

1222
00:45:59,520 --> 00:46:00,320
I started slamming

1223
00:46:00,320 --> 00:46:01,760
She was like, in case you want to make them bark for us

1224
00:46:01,760 --> 00:46:02,880
That's why we shut them up

1225
00:46:02,880 --> 00:46:03,680
I think he got the answer, baby

1226
00:46:03,680 --> 00:46:04,880
How long were they going?

1227
00:46:04,880 --> 00:46:05,680
Long time

1228
00:46:05,680 --> 00:46:06,720
Oh, it's long time

1229
00:46:06,720 --> 00:46:07,520
Long time, Charlie

1230
00:46:07,520 --> 00:46:10,720
He started hitting the gong when he said, say

1231
00:46:10,720 --> 00:46:11,840
How long were they going?

1232
00:46:11,840 --> 00:46:12,720
I don't even know what now

1233
00:46:12,720 --> 00:46:13,920
How long were they going?

1234
00:46:13,920 --> 00:46:14,560
Long time

1235
00:46:14,560 --> 00:46:15,440
Long time

1236
00:46:15,440 --> 00:46:20,160
So then wait, so wait

1237
00:46:20,160 --> 00:46:21,280
What time was this in the mall?

1238
00:46:21,280 --> 00:46:21,920
Was this

1239
00:46:21,920 --> 00:46:23,040
What time?

1240
00:46:23,040 --> 00:46:23,680
First of all

1241
00:46:23,680 --> 00:46:24,240
Why?

1242
00:46:24,240 --> 00:46:26,720
It probably would start until people should be sleeping

1243
00:46:26,720 --> 00:46:29,360
Well, first of all, by the time you were making breakfast

1244
00:46:29,360 --> 00:46:33,040
They probably just stopped because it was time to quit fucking

1245
00:46:33,040 --> 00:46:34,000
Imagine that

1246
00:46:34,000 --> 00:46:34,560
Your neighbors

1247
00:46:34,560 --> 00:46:35,840
Two in the morning when I noticed he was having

1248
00:46:35,840 --> 00:46:38,560
The neighbors are downstairs gacked out having gay sex

1249
00:46:38,560 --> 00:46:42,400
And you're gacked out upstairs having to listen to it

1250
00:46:42,400 --> 00:46:43,200
That's horrible

1251
00:46:43,200 --> 00:46:45,120
That is a nice way of writing it

1252
00:46:45,120 --> 00:46:45,840
I wanted to get some sleep

1253
00:46:45,840 --> 00:46:46,960
That really is

1254
00:46:46,960 --> 00:46:49,360
Then I said, I better not have gay sex again

1255
00:46:49,360 --> 00:46:49,840
I'll never get sleep

1256
00:46:49,840 --> 00:46:50,960
Should you go check it out?

1257
00:46:50,960 --> 00:46:51,440
No, of course not

1258
00:46:51,440 --> 00:46:53,120
You like knocked out the door?

1259
00:46:53,120 --> 00:46:53,280
No

1260
00:46:54,080 --> 00:46:55,360
I have Don Antford

1261
00:46:55,360 --> 00:46:56,000
No

1262
00:46:56,000 --> 00:46:57,280
You got a bottle of wine

1263
00:46:57,280 --> 00:46:59,440
We should go get him down here

1264
00:46:59,440 --> 00:47:00,400
And two cups

1265
00:47:00,960 --> 00:47:02,400
No, I mean, I don't want

1266
00:47:02,400 --> 00:47:03,360
No, two

1267
00:47:03,360 --> 00:47:04,160
They got a share

1268
00:47:04,160 --> 00:47:05,200
I don't really care

1269
00:47:05,200 --> 00:47:07,120
Well, then you can hear him talking to the one

1270
00:47:07,120 --> 00:47:07,840
Just the one guy

1271
00:47:07,840 --> 00:47:08,720
His voice is so deep

1272
00:47:08,720 --> 00:47:09,280
It's just like him

1273
00:47:09,280 --> 00:47:09,680
You hear that?

1274
00:47:09,680 --> 00:47:10,960
I'm a three-doll

1275
00:47:10,960 --> 00:47:12,000
Coming through the wall

1276
00:47:12,000 --> 00:47:12,720
Coming through the wall

1277
00:47:12,720 --> 00:47:14,080
Three dudes, two girls

1278
00:47:14,080 --> 00:47:16,720
Rarararararararararararararara

1279
00:47:16,720 --> 00:47:17,520
I mean, seriously

1280
00:47:17,520 --> 00:47:19,040
I'm not gonna

1281
00:47:19,040 --> 00:47:20,480
Lot of nothing I was interrupting

1282
00:47:20,480 --> 00:47:21,600
Jesus, wait a second

1283
00:47:21,600 --> 00:47:22,160
Wait a minute

1284
00:47:22,160 --> 00:47:25,760
Did you just hear the sex noise he made?

1285
00:47:25,760 --> 00:47:26,960
Rarararararara

1286
00:47:26,960 --> 00:47:27,760
Was that what you just did?

1287
00:47:27,760 --> 00:47:29,040
No, it's his voice talking

1288
00:47:29,040 --> 00:47:29,680
That's what I'm talking about

1289
00:47:29,680 --> 00:47:30,560
That's what I'm talking about

1290
00:47:30,560 --> 00:47:33,360
He's been having a cigarette after sex

1291
00:47:33,360 --> 00:47:34,000
Oh

1292
00:47:34,000 --> 00:47:35,280
You could smell that too?

1293
00:47:35,280 --> 00:47:36,720
Yeah, they had a cigarette and then they'd say

1294
00:47:36,720 --> 00:47:37,680
That was really good

1295
00:47:37,680 --> 00:47:39,600
Thanks for having my ass so hard

1296
00:47:39,600 --> 00:47:41,600
There's nothing worse than listening to gay sex

1297
00:47:41,600 --> 00:47:43,600
And smelling a cigarette after a gay sex

1298
00:47:43,600 --> 00:47:44,800
Oh, God

1299
00:47:44,800 --> 00:47:45,920
You just know we just got

1300
00:47:45,920 --> 00:47:46,880
I'm not sure I was gay

1301
00:47:46,880 --> 00:47:47,920
I was gay sex, I don't know

1302
00:47:48,640 --> 00:47:50,240
Yeah, no, now you're speculating

1303
00:47:50,240 --> 00:47:52,080
You just told us you were sure it was gay sex

1304
00:47:52,080 --> 00:47:53,040
No, no, I don't know if we're sure

1305
00:47:53,040 --> 00:47:55,280
I was in this band, the barbecuities

1306
00:47:55,280 --> 00:47:56,800
And we fucking went on the tour

1307
00:47:56,800 --> 00:47:57,680
Hey, look at that

1308
00:47:57,680 --> 00:48:00,880
And this girl Gabby was the lead singer

1309
00:48:00,880 --> 00:48:01,280
Yeah

1310
00:48:01,280 --> 00:48:04,080
And I don't care if I'm saying anybody's name

1311
00:48:04,080 --> 00:48:05,840
And she was having gay sex

1312
00:48:05,840 --> 00:48:07,040
But she was a girl

1313
00:48:07,040 --> 00:48:07,600
Oh, yeah

1314
00:48:07,600 --> 00:48:08,880
So technically that's cool

1315
00:48:08,880 --> 00:48:10,640
It's not even called a gay sex

1316
00:48:10,640 --> 00:48:11,520
It wasn't quite as bad

1317
00:48:11,520 --> 00:48:12,960
It's the most awesome thing in the world

1318
00:48:12,960 --> 00:48:14,080
Still raw, but right

1319
00:48:14,080 --> 00:48:17,440
But me and her husband who were the bass player in this band

1320
00:48:17,440 --> 00:48:19,680
Were carrying all the gear and we loaded the van

1321
00:48:19,680 --> 00:48:20,240
And we get in the

1322
00:48:20,240 --> 00:48:21,520
She's trading for her

1323
00:48:21,520 --> 00:48:23,840
We get in the apartment and you could just fucking

1324
00:48:23,840 --> 00:48:25,360
You know, and then we just groupie

1325
00:48:25,360 --> 00:48:27,440
They fucking let us sleep over the whole band

1326
00:48:27,440 --> 00:48:28,480
And we get in there

1327
00:48:28,480 --> 00:48:30,480
And the other girls aren't there yet

1328
00:48:30,480 --> 00:48:33,200
And it's just Gabby with the girl who owns the apartment

1329
00:48:33,200 --> 00:48:36,480
Yeah, and just you walk in the room and just pussy

1330
00:48:36,480 --> 00:48:37,200
You know

1331
00:48:37,200 --> 00:48:38,640
Boom, you smell pussy

1332
00:48:38,640 --> 00:48:39,520
They're really good

1333
00:48:39,520 --> 00:48:41,680
Are you guys making salmon or trading for her?

1334
00:48:41,680 --> 00:48:43,280
I was like, this is awesome, man

1335
00:48:43,280 --> 00:48:45,920
Yeah, they're just scissoring up there by themselves

1336
00:48:45,920 --> 00:48:47,280
But the dude who was made her

1337
00:48:47,280 --> 00:48:47,680
Her husband

1338
00:48:47,680 --> 00:48:48,160
Yeah

1339
00:48:48,160 --> 00:48:48,960
Oh, man

1340
00:48:48,960 --> 00:48:49,840
So wait a minute

1341
00:48:49,840 --> 00:48:51,120
So the funny thing is you're like

1342
00:48:51,120 --> 00:48:52,240
He got so fucking mad

1343
00:48:52,240 --> 00:48:53,440
Oh, you think that?

1344
00:48:53,440 --> 00:48:55,120
I mean, he's too

1345
00:48:55,120 --> 00:48:56,400
He couldn't join in

1346
00:48:56,400 --> 00:48:57,600
You're like, dude, no

1347
00:48:57,600 --> 00:48:59,120
Is Matt jealous of his girlfriend?

1348
00:48:59,120 --> 00:49:01,600
It wasn't his girlfriend, it was his wife

1349
00:49:01,600 --> 00:49:02,960
But listen, I just figured

1350
00:49:02,960 --> 00:49:03,760
I just pictured

1351
00:49:03,760 --> 00:49:04,480
He didn't know this about his wife?

1352
00:49:04,480 --> 00:49:05,040
He didn't know this

1353
00:49:05,040 --> 00:49:05,520
Oh, what?

1354
00:49:05,520 --> 00:49:06,000
My picture

1355
00:49:06,000 --> 00:49:08,560
I pictured Larry and this guy walking up the stairs

1356
00:49:08,560 --> 00:49:09,120
And he's just

1357
00:49:09,120 --> 00:49:10,080
They see him both in bed

1358
00:49:10,080 --> 00:49:11,120
And Larry's like

1359
00:49:11,120 --> 00:49:11,760
All right

1360
00:49:11,760 --> 00:49:12,800
And he's like, I said it's his

1361
00:49:12,800 --> 00:49:13,920
Very second step

1362
00:49:13,920 --> 00:49:14,720
And he's like

1363
00:49:14,720 --> 00:49:15,920
What the fuck?

1364
00:49:15,920 --> 00:49:17,760
Dude, that's my wife

1365
00:49:17,760 --> 00:49:18,960
Awesome

1366
00:49:18,960 --> 00:49:19,760
Exactly

1367
00:49:19,760 --> 00:49:22,080
Yeah, he's so stoned out of your mind

1368
00:49:22,080 --> 00:49:24,080
Of course, a big fight ensued

1369
00:49:24,080 --> 00:49:27,280
And I was like, holy shit, man

1370
00:49:27,280 --> 00:49:31,200
And she was like, and here was this bitch's argument, okay?

1371
00:49:31,200 --> 00:49:33,040
It's my fucking birthday

1372
00:49:33,040 --> 00:49:34,800
And I wanna get fucking laid

1373
00:49:34,800 --> 00:49:36,240
Now I wanna have an orgy

1374
00:49:36,240 --> 00:49:37,520
And I wanna fuck everybody

1375
00:49:37,520 --> 00:49:38,080
What you mean?

1376
00:49:38,080 --> 00:49:39,280
You didn't say, yeah

1377
00:49:39,280 --> 00:49:40,080
This is awesome

1378
00:49:40,080 --> 00:49:40,560
Yeah

1379
00:49:40,560 --> 00:49:42,080
Should I take my pants off now?

1380
00:49:42,080 --> 00:49:43,120
When we were at the bar, though

1381
00:49:43,120 --> 00:49:44,640
The chick that owned the house

1382
00:49:44,640 --> 00:49:46,240
That was actually was an apartment

1383
00:49:46,240 --> 00:49:48,080
That was letting us sleep over

1384
00:49:48,080 --> 00:49:49,360
She had a nice rack

1385
00:49:49,360 --> 00:49:51,760
And she takes out her tits

1386
00:49:51,760 --> 00:49:53,920
And Gabby starts sucking on her tits

1387
00:49:53,920 --> 00:49:55,920
And I'm starting to get fucking horny

1388
00:49:55,920 --> 00:49:57,360
Oh my god, Larry

1389
00:49:57,360 --> 00:50:00,240
I tell them, I tell them to shade out, man

1390
00:50:00,240 --> 00:50:01,520
This is fucking great

1391
00:50:01,520 --> 00:50:04,480
We're gonna all go to your house and party, right?

1392
00:50:04,480 --> 00:50:05,760
And they're like, yeah

1393
00:50:05,760 --> 00:50:08,560
And I'm thinking, yeah, and this broad is gonna

1394
00:50:08,560 --> 00:50:10,560
Fuck and everything else and

1395
00:50:10,560 --> 00:50:12,320
And then, you know, and then I realize

1396
00:50:12,320 --> 00:50:13,920
I'm not gonna do any of that shit

1397
00:50:13,920 --> 00:50:16,080
But it was really wild for a minute

1398
00:50:16,080 --> 00:50:16,720
Thinking it

1399
00:50:16,720 --> 00:50:19,600
And then when we actually did walk in on it

1400
00:50:19,600 --> 00:50:21,280
And the dude just fucking

1401
00:50:21,280 --> 00:50:22,320
It's suddenly real

1402
00:50:22,320 --> 00:50:23,040
Oh, dude, man

1403
00:50:23,040 --> 00:50:23,520
Yeah

1404
00:50:23,520 --> 00:50:25,520
Because his chickie was pissed

1405
00:50:25,520 --> 00:50:26,880
Obviously, he wasn't cool with it

1406
00:50:26,880 --> 00:50:29,120
If he was cool with it, he'd be like, hey, let me bang her now

1407
00:50:29,120 --> 00:50:31,520
No, yeah, but he wasn't like that at that time

1408
00:50:31,520 --> 00:50:32,320
He was pissed

1409
00:50:32,320 --> 00:50:33,360
No, at that time

1410
00:50:33,360 --> 00:50:34,640
And then they got divorced

1411
00:50:34,640 --> 00:50:35,280
I don't know

1412
00:50:35,920 --> 00:50:38,080
You just left them out of your life?

1413
00:50:39,200 --> 00:50:41,680
I never talked to him again after that tour, man

1414
00:50:41,680 --> 00:50:43,200
The tour, listen to this

1415
00:50:43,200 --> 00:50:45,600
After that, now this was about five gigs

1416
00:50:45,600 --> 00:50:48,240
Into like a 15-gig tour

1417
00:50:48,240 --> 00:50:49,840
And the whole thing disintegrated

1418
00:50:49,840 --> 00:50:51,840
I know, yeah, you're gonna get a parking ticket

1419
00:50:51,840 --> 00:50:53,120
All right, what's more gay?

1420
00:50:53,120 --> 00:50:55,680
Voter fraud or Big Mike?

1421
00:50:58,480 --> 00:50:59,360
Wow

1422
00:50:59,360 --> 00:50:59,840
Big Mike is...

1423
00:50:59,840 --> 00:51:02,640
Oh, you don't know who Big Mike is?

1424
00:51:02,640 --> 00:51:03,760
Michelle Obama

1425
00:51:04,480 --> 00:51:06,160
Oh, yeah, no, I don't really know that

1426
00:51:06,160 --> 00:51:07,120
No, no, okay

1427
00:51:07,120 --> 00:51:08,480
Big Mike, it's a man

1428
00:51:08,480 --> 00:51:09,360
It's a man, baby

1429
00:51:09,360 --> 00:51:09,840
I understand

1430
00:51:09,840 --> 00:51:10,400
I understand

1431
00:51:10,400 --> 00:51:11,680
So what's more gay?

1432
00:51:11,680 --> 00:51:13,200
Michelle Obama, that's a man

1433
00:51:13,200 --> 00:51:13,840
I get it

1434
00:51:13,840 --> 00:51:15,920
Or voter fraud

1435
00:51:15,920 --> 00:51:17,680
I'd say Barack Obama

1436
00:51:17,680 --> 00:51:18,560
Oh, yeah, Michelle Obama

1437
00:51:18,560 --> 00:51:20,560
Hey, hey, hey, it's not the game, asshole

1438
00:51:20,560 --> 00:51:21,040
I know, buddy

1439
00:51:21,040 --> 00:51:22,400
Stick to fucking parameters

1440
00:51:22,400 --> 00:51:23,520
I'm gonna...

1441
00:51:23,520 --> 00:51:26,240
I have no problems kicking a lady in a fur coat

1442
00:51:26,240 --> 00:51:27,760
I'd say voter fraud, then

1443
00:51:28,880 --> 00:51:29,920
And for...

1444
00:51:29,920 --> 00:51:31,520
No, no, Big Mike is definitely gay

1445
00:51:31,520 --> 00:51:32,720
Voter fraud

1446
00:51:32,720 --> 00:51:33,280
Why is that?

1447
00:51:34,080 --> 00:51:35,040
Oh, because she's gay

1448
00:51:35,840 --> 00:51:37,120
See, Ant Forth wins, Ant Forth

1449
00:51:37,120 --> 00:51:38,800
I mean, that was gay

1450
00:51:38,800 --> 00:51:40,160
That's how simple it went

1451
00:51:41,040 --> 00:51:41,680
I wouldn't...

1452
00:51:41,680 --> 00:51:42,640
Fuck it, hey

1453
00:51:42,640 --> 00:51:44,240
That Ant Forth's good at the game

1454
00:51:44,240 --> 00:51:46,080
Frank did not like this game at all

1455
00:51:49,680 --> 00:51:51,040
Frank's fucking tired

1456
00:51:51,040 --> 00:51:52,400
Yeah, I can tell

1457
00:51:53,360 --> 00:51:55,200
But it's funny, I have a hard time

1458
00:51:55,200 --> 00:51:55,840
Larry

1459
00:51:56,720 --> 00:51:58,080
It's very funny

1460
00:52:00,080 --> 00:52:00,960
Oh, we can't see

1461
00:52:00,960 --> 00:52:03,520
No, he's pulling the dot Ant Forth

1462
00:52:03,520 --> 00:52:04,880
I'm trying to see if I can find it

1463
00:52:04,880 --> 00:52:05,760
He's pulling the dot Ant Forth

1464
00:52:05,760 --> 00:52:08,320
You know, being a waiter and everything

1465
00:52:09,840 --> 00:52:11,280
I didn't realize actually...

1466
00:52:11,280 --> 00:52:12,320
Let's see that, Johnny

1467
00:52:12,320 --> 00:52:13,520
You know, how gay it is

1468
00:52:13,520 --> 00:52:14,160
You know, I suppose...

1469
00:52:14,160 --> 00:52:14,880
Oh, yeah

1470
00:52:14,880 --> 00:52:15,360
What's that?

1471
00:52:15,360 --> 00:52:16,400
It's the years progressed

1472
00:52:16,400 --> 00:52:18,800
More and more gays got, you know, involved

1473
00:52:18,800 --> 00:52:20,000
Or became more apparent to me

1474
00:52:20,000 --> 00:52:22,080
But when I first started, it never occurred to me

1475
00:52:22,080 --> 00:52:22,880
You had no idea

1476
00:52:22,880 --> 00:52:24,400
The amount of gays would get as big as you had

1477
00:52:24,400 --> 00:52:25,600
Oh, yeah, once you see them

1478
00:52:26,320 --> 00:52:27,680
I mean, I was blind to it

1479
00:52:27,680 --> 00:52:28,880
I really didn't even know

1480
00:52:28,880 --> 00:52:30,480
Yeah, that's what a gay guy does

1481
00:52:30,480 --> 00:52:33,040
One or two young guys that were gay

1482
00:52:33,040 --> 00:52:35,360
There was a lot of gays in rock and roll

1483
00:52:35,360 --> 00:52:36,960
But, so, yeah, I'm working at a place

1484
00:52:36,960 --> 00:52:38,480
There's a lot of drugs in rock and roll

1485
00:52:38,480 --> 00:52:40,400
People do crazy shit when they get...

1486
00:52:40,400 --> 00:52:41,840
Who's their inhibitions?

1487
00:52:41,840 --> 00:52:43,200
Yeah, I'm working at this place

1488
00:52:43,200 --> 00:52:45,440
And there's a bunch of young kids working there

1489
00:52:45,440 --> 00:52:48,000
And there's these guys, girls, working together

1490
00:52:48,000 --> 00:52:50,800
And there's this really pretty girl at one of the tables

1491
00:52:50,800 --> 00:52:52,960
And there's this waiter I'm working with, Jerry

1492
00:52:52,960 --> 00:52:54,000
And he's just a young kid

1493
00:52:54,000 --> 00:52:54,960
You know, mid-20s, whatever

1494
00:52:54,960 --> 00:52:55,680
Good looking kid

1495
00:52:55,680 --> 00:52:58,400
And you're thinking he's getting more pussy than I'll get out

1496
00:52:58,400 --> 00:53:00,000
Yeah, and I'm like, man, check out this chick, dude

1497
00:53:00,000 --> 00:53:01,520
Is that chick smoking or what?

1498
00:53:01,520 --> 00:53:04,000
He's like, yeah, yeah, that girl, she's really pretty

1499
00:53:04,000 --> 00:53:05,440
And, you know, I keep going, man

1500
00:53:05,440 --> 00:53:06,240
This chick is super hot

1501
00:53:06,240 --> 00:53:07,200
Oh, look at that one's ass

1502
00:53:07,200 --> 00:53:07,760
Yeah, yeah, yeah

1503
00:53:07,760 --> 00:53:09,520
And he's like, Mark, look, dude, I gotta tell you, you know

1504
00:53:09,520 --> 00:53:10,080
It's a dude

1505
00:53:10,080 --> 00:53:10,880
I...

1506
00:53:10,880 --> 00:53:12,880
You didn't say dude, whatever, you know, but he's...

1507
00:53:12,880 --> 00:53:13,600
It's funny

1508
00:53:13,600 --> 00:53:14,400
Then he starts saying...

1509
00:53:14,400 --> 00:53:15,280
No, who's it?

1510
00:53:15,280 --> 00:53:18,480
I want your heart to explain it to you, don't get offended or...

1511
00:53:18,480 --> 00:53:20,480
You know, but I need to tell you something

1512
00:53:20,480 --> 00:53:22,320
I started thinking, oh, no, is he...

1513
00:53:22,320 --> 00:53:23,520
And he goes, well, you know

1514
00:53:23,520 --> 00:53:24,160
I'm...

1515
00:53:24,160 --> 00:53:24,400
Yeah

1516
00:53:24,400 --> 00:53:25,120
The finook?

1517
00:53:25,120 --> 00:53:26,000
Yeah, he goes, well, I'm...

1518
00:53:26,000 --> 00:53:26,880
I'm like, you are not!

1519
00:53:27,840 --> 00:53:30,160
He's like, no, I am, cleansing my boyfriend

1520
00:53:30,160 --> 00:53:31,520
I'm like, cleansing gay, too!

1521
00:53:33,600 --> 00:53:34,400
That finook!

1522
00:53:34,400 --> 00:53:34,800
Yeah

1523
00:53:34,800 --> 00:53:36,400
I didn't even realize it

1524
00:53:36,400 --> 00:53:37,600
I have no idea

1525
00:53:37,600 --> 00:53:38,880
Oh, man, these guys...

1526
00:53:38,880 --> 00:53:40,320
Well, is that one thing?

1527
00:53:40,320 --> 00:53:40,800
Yeah

1528
00:53:40,800 --> 00:53:41,600
Oh, man, you're a shillery man

1529
00:53:41,600 --> 00:53:44,400
I had a finook and guys too, like, he could be getting tons of fuck up with you

1530
00:53:44,400 --> 00:53:45,600
That's his whole thing, man

1531
00:53:45,600 --> 00:53:46,240
What is it, thing, though?

1532
00:53:46,240 --> 00:53:47,440
Let me tell you, being gay...

1533
00:53:47,440 --> 00:53:48,640
Dude, you're gonna be fucking getting chicks

1534
00:53:48,640 --> 00:53:49,680
This is a fucking...

1535
00:53:49,680 --> 00:53:51,520
Dude, man...

1536
00:53:51,520 --> 00:53:52,480
Man, it's a thing, dude

1537
00:53:52,480 --> 00:53:55,120
I can't say because they have these apps, they have all this stuff

1538
00:53:55,120 --> 00:53:56,880
Gay guys don't give a fuck, man

1539
00:53:56,880 --> 00:53:58,880
They don't get a handjob in a white castle

1540
00:53:58,880 --> 00:53:59,440
Oh, they're just shicking

1541
00:53:59,440 --> 00:54:00,720
I know that's what you want

1542
00:54:00,720 --> 00:54:02,720
I'm just saying, that's how awesome, dude

1543
00:54:02,720 --> 00:54:04,240
Who was your kid from the mall?

1544
00:54:04,240 --> 00:54:04,960
Doesn't that sound...

1545
00:54:04,960 --> 00:54:06,800
Oh, how about this, man?

1546
00:54:06,800 --> 00:54:07,520
Just people

1547
00:54:07,520 --> 00:54:08,560
This kid told me...

1548
00:54:08,560 --> 00:54:10,320
He's like, this kid, Jesus

1549
00:54:10,320 --> 00:54:10,800
People

1550
00:54:10,800 --> 00:54:13,600
This kid, Jesus, that I used to record down here in the basement

1551
00:54:13,600 --> 00:54:14,560
Yeah, that doesn't sound...

1552
00:54:14,560 --> 00:54:15,760
He was from Venezuela

1553
00:54:15,760 --> 00:54:17,200
Oh, okay, that explains a lot

1554
00:54:17,200 --> 00:54:18,960
What he is could be...

1555
00:54:18,960 --> 00:54:22,720
He tells me I had sex with 150 people

1556
00:54:22,720 --> 00:54:25,120
In over 72 women

1557
00:54:25,120 --> 00:54:26,400
And I'm like, oh, wow

1558
00:54:26,400 --> 00:54:27,680
Yeah, that doesn't add up, bud

1559
00:54:27,680 --> 00:54:29,760
And then he tells me...

1560
00:54:29,760 --> 00:54:30,400
Yeah

1561
00:54:30,400 --> 00:54:31,120
Then he tells me...

1562
00:54:31,120 --> 00:54:32,000
Trying to tell me about...

1563
00:54:32,000 --> 00:54:36,800
I pick up guys at the fucking bathroom at Stratford Square

1564
00:54:36,800 --> 00:54:37,520
I fucking...

1565
00:54:37,520 --> 00:54:37,920
Dude, that's what I'm saying

1566
00:54:37,920 --> 00:54:40,960
I go home in the car for 20 bucks

1567
00:54:40,960 --> 00:54:42,480
Whoa, 20 bucks is cheap

1568
00:54:42,480 --> 00:54:44,720
Now, Mary's down here and we're all down here one day

1569
00:54:44,720 --> 00:54:46,160
And he's telling me and Mary this

1570
00:54:46,160 --> 00:54:48,240
And he goes, boy, you, man

1571
00:54:48,240 --> 00:54:50,800
He tells me I did you for Taddy

1572
00:54:50,800 --> 00:54:52,960
Oh, man, I like this guy

1573
00:54:52,960 --> 00:54:54,320
What's his name again?

1574
00:54:54,320 --> 00:54:54,960
Jesus

1575
00:54:54,960 --> 00:54:56,240
R.I.P. Jesus

1576
00:54:56,240 --> 00:54:56,960
He's alive

1577
00:54:56,960 --> 00:54:57,760
Oh, is he?

1578
00:54:57,760 --> 00:54:59,520
I don't know, I don't think he's dead

1579
00:54:59,520 --> 00:55:00,800
He's got a lot of yourbred in on

1580
00:55:00,800 --> 00:55:01,600
I would assume he's dead

1581
00:55:01,600 --> 00:55:03,200
If he's blowing guys in the parking lot

1582
00:55:03,200 --> 00:55:04,160
Maybe

1583
00:55:04,160 --> 00:55:04,720
Yeah

1584
00:55:04,720 --> 00:55:05,840
I mean, this guy lives a rough...

1585
00:55:05,840 --> 00:55:07,040
I had a rough paper round

1586
00:55:07,040 --> 00:55:08,000
Actually, I saw him the other day

1587
00:55:08,000 --> 00:55:09,200
He asked you about your 10 bucks

1588
00:55:09,200 --> 00:55:10,720
Yeah, I don't...

1589
00:55:10,720 --> 00:55:11,600
Oh, I got his nine

1590
00:55:11,600 --> 00:55:13,200
I told him I got his nine

1591
00:55:13,200 --> 00:55:13,840
There you go

1592
00:55:13,840 --> 00:55:15,440
He said I'll do it for nine, man

1593
00:55:15,440 --> 00:55:16,720
Yeah, and my wife has to watch

1594
00:55:16,720 --> 00:55:17,360
And this kid...

1595
00:55:17,360 --> 00:55:18,160
So one night...

1596
00:55:18,160 --> 00:55:20,880
So one day we just get done with a person

1597
00:55:20,880 --> 00:55:22,480
He's smoking a hit

1598
00:55:22,480 --> 00:55:23,680
Oh, I...

1599
00:55:23,680 --> 00:55:25,040
So this is the one night

1600
00:55:25,040 --> 00:55:26,480
Me and Jesus...

1601
00:55:27,200 --> 00:55:29,440
We just get done with a long recording session

1602
00:55:29,440 --> 00:55:30,400
Doug was here

1603
00:55:30,400 --> 00:55:32,640
Doug was playing drums on the studio session

1604
00:55:32,640 --> 00:55:34,240
I was manning the mixing board

1605
00:55:34,240 --> 00:55:36,480
Jesus had a band called Manifest

1606
00:55:36,480 --> 00:55:37,040
Pretty old

1607
00:55:37,040 --> 00:55:38,880
And they were super heavy fucking

1608
00:55:38,880 --> 00:55:39,440
Manifest

1609
00:55:39,440 --> 00:55:41,520
Heavy heavy metal

1610
00:55:41,520 --> 00:55:42,720
Heavy duty shit

1611
00:55:43,520 --> 00:55:45,440
And one night afterwards

1612
00:55:45,440 --> 00:55:46,080
We're getting high

1613
00:55:46,080 --> 00:55:47,760
We're doing blowing shit

1614
00:55:47,760 --> 00:55:48,080
Jesus

1615
00:55:48,080 --> 00:55:49,040
Doug looks over

1616
00:55:49,920 --> 00:55:50,480
And he's like...

1617
00:55:50,480 --> 00:55:51,440
To Hazers, he's like

1618
00:55:51,440 --> 00:55:52,880
You got on makeup

1619
00:55:52,880 --> 00:55:53,680
Yeah, yeah

1620
00:55:53,680 --> 00:55:54,880
And Hazers's like, no man

1621
00:55:55,520 --> 00:55:56,880
And Doug's like, no man

1622
00:55:56,880 --> 00:55:57,920
You got makeup on

1623
00:55:57,920 --> 00:55:59,360
And you know, like when you see like a

1624
00:56:00,000 --> 00:56:02,560
Transvestite and the beard stubble

1625
00:56:02,560 --> 00:56:04,400
Starts growing through the makeup

1626
00:56:04,400 --> 00:56:06,080
After they've been up for too long

1627
00:56:06,720 --> 00:56:07,280
And he's like...

1628
00:56:07,280 --> 00:56:08,320
No, I don't know that, Larry

1629
00:56:08,320 --> 00:56:09,920
I'm sorry, I'm sorry

1630
00:56:09,920 --> 00:56:11,840
I really don't know that

1631
00:56:11,840 --> 00:56:12,960
The corky

1632
00:56:12,960 --> 00:56:14,000
He had it

1633
00:56:14,000 --> 00:56:14,720
Yeah, okay

1634
00:56:19,760 --> 00:56:21,200
I mean like it's something normal

1635
00:56:22,240 --> 00:56:22,640
Oh yeah

1636
00:56:22,640 --> 00:56:24,160
It made the fucking birds

1637
00:56:24,160 --> 00:56:25,040
Not my seat

1638
00:56:25,040 --> 00:56:26,000
Oh man

1639
00:56:26,000 --> 00:56:26,880
Made the first time

1640
00:56:26,880 --> 00:56:28,800
You did the last time either

1641
00:56:28,800 --> 00:56:30,560
The funny thing was was

1642
00:56:30,560 --> 00:56:31,920
Doug was just like

1643
00:56:31,920 --> 00:56:33,040
No fucking dude

1644
00:56:33,040 --> 00:56:34,160
You're wearing makeup

1645
00:56:34,160 --> 00:56:36,000
And Jesus would not admit it

1646
00:56:36,000 --> 00:56:37,200
And he had a lipstick

1647
00:56:37,200 --> 00:56:38,800
And he had a lipstick

1648
00:56:38,800 --> 00:56:39,520
Jesus, man

1649
00:56:39,520 --> 00:56:42,000
The dude was done up like a motherfucker

1650
00:56:42,720 --> 00:56:44,320
He, you know

1651
00:56:44,320 --> 00:56:46,160
He was very forward about it

1652
00:56:46,160 --> 00:56:48,160
He was fucking bang anybody

1653
00:56:48,160 --> 00:56:49,120
Yeah, Venezuela, huh?

1654
00:56:49,120 --> 00:56:49,520
Yeah

1655
00:56:49,520 --> 00:56:50,160
No shit

1656
00:56:50,160 --> 00:56:50,400
Yeah

1657
00:56:50,400 --> 00:56:52,080
And you were his white fucking unicorn

1658
00:56:52,080 --> 00:56:53,440
Or even his unicorn

1659
00:56:53,440 --> 00:56:54,960
He couldn't turn you Larry

1660
00:56:54,960 --> 00:56:56,720
But how much blue you did

1661
00:56:56,720 --> 00:56:58,320
He couldn't make you $10

1662
00:56:58,320 --> 00:56:59,280
Not even for $10

1663
00:56:59,280 --> 00:57:00,000
Not even for $10

1664
00:57:00,000 --> 00:57:01,120
And that's a deal

1665
00:57:01,120 --> 00:57:02,880
He told you how much he does in the car

1666
00:57:02,880 --> 00:57:04,640
Because he probably fucking gives you a hand

1667
00:57:04,640 --> 00:57:07,200
50% off dude

1668
00:57:07,200 --> 00:57:07,840
I mean listen

1669
00:57:07,840 --> 00:57:10,320
How many dicks do you gotta suck to make rent?

1670
00:57:10,880 --> 00:57:12,400
20 bucks a box, dude

1671
00:57:12,960 --> 00:57:14,560
I mean Jesus, dude

1672
00:57:14,560 --> 00:57:15,040
I mean you

1673
00:57:15,040 --> 00:57:16,160
Okay, this is who you like

1674
00:57:16,160 --> 00:57:17,680
Give me some factor of enjoyment

1675
00:57:17,680 --> 00:57:19,520
You have to have like a business plan though

1676
00:57:19,520 --> 00:57:20,160
Like I'm gonna

1677
00:57:20,160 --> 00:57:21,920
I need to suck 10 dicks today

1678
00:57:21,920 --> 00:57:23,120
Even have a business plan

1679
00:57:23,120 --> 00:57:24,400
He's not his plan

1680
00:57:24,400 --> 00:57:25,280
Listen

1681
00:57:25,280 --> 00:57:28,320
His business plan was he worked at Spencer's GIFs

1682
00:57:28,320 --> 00:57:29,360
Oh this may all make sense now

1683
00:57:29,360 --> 00:57:31,840
There's still shit on the side

1684
00:57:31,840 --> 00:57:33,600
And would come over here and give me shit

1685
00:57:33,600 --> 00:57:33,920
Like I have it

1686
00:57:33,920 --> 00:57:34,560
Yes, right

1687
00:57:34,560 --> 00:57:35,920
I had a disco ball

1688
00:57:35,920 --> 00:57:36,640
Yeah like a naked lady

1689
00:57:36,640 --> 00:57:38,160
He's just feeling like a black light poster

1690
00:57:38,160 --> 00:57:39,360
With a naked lady

1691
00:57:39,360 --> 00:57:40,240
All that shit

1692
00:57:40,240 --> 00:57:40,960
There's no comparison

1693
00:57:40,960 --> 00:57:42,720
Anything they sell at Spencer's

1694
00:57:42,720 --> 00:57:43,440
How old were you?

1695
00:57:44,080 --> 00:57:45,760
This is probably going back about

1696
00:57:45,760 --> 00:57:47,120
Fuckin' 15

1697
00:57:47,120 --> 00:57:47,680
10, 15

1698
00:57:47,680 --> 00:57:48,640
He still lived here

1699
00:57:48,640 --> 00:57:49,120
Yeah

1700
00:57:49,120 --> 00:57:50,880
So it looks like a Spencer's gift in here

1701
00:57:51,440 --> 00:57:51,920
Yeah

1702
00:57:51,920 --> 00:57:53,520
And it's like black light posters

1703
00:57:53,520 --> 00:57:53,760
Yeah

1704
00:57:53,760 --> 00:57:54,720
The mushroom one

1705
00:57:54,720 --> 00:57:56,560
With like the little frogs on it

1706
00:57:56,560 --> 00:57:57,360
Oh yeah

1707
00:57:57,360 --> 00:57:58,160
The hookah one

1708
00:57:58,160 --> 00:58:00,240
All the re-top 60 shit

1709
00:58:00,240 --> 00:58:01,120
And the plug-in

1710
00:58:01,120 --> 00:58:01,680
Okay so wait

1711
00:58:01,680 --> 00:58:03,360
I had the beads in between the

1712
00:58:03,360 --> 00:58:05,440
Oh yeah the Jesus beads man

1713
00:58:05,440 --> 00:58:06,560
Yeah those were the bass

1714
00:58:06,560 --> 00:58:08,320
I had those when I lived in Cali

1715
00:58:08,320 --> 00:58:09,520
Mine were Mother Mary though

1716
00:58:10,560 --> 00:58:11,200
Oh but what do you call it?

1717
00:58:11,200 --> 00:58:13,120
Ours were just disco looking things

1718
00:58:13,120 --> 00:58:13,920
So wait a second

1719
00:58:13,920 --> 00:58:15,360
So no Jesus picture

1720
00:58:15,360 --> 00:58:17,680
Jesus worked at Spencer's

1721
00:58:17,680 --> 00:58:20,880
And sucked dick in the parking lot for 20 bucks a box

1722
00:58:20,880 --> 00:58:22,880
But waited in the bathroom to find John's

1723
00:58:22,880 --> 00:58:23,680
Sometimes yeah

1724
00:58:23,680 --> 00:58:25,680
And he'd pick him up also in Spencer's

1725
00:58:25,680 --> 00:58:27,680
And he would have to

1726
00:58:27,680 --> 00:58:30,000
Dude he said there was a gay bad there

1727
00:58:30,000 --> 00:58:34,240
Oh my god holy shit man

1728
00:58:34,240 --> 00:58:36,640
This is a fucking revelation to me man

1729
00:58:36,640 --> 00:58:37,600
What do you do?

1730
00:58:37,600 --> 00:58:38,400
How do you know?

1731
00:58:38,400 --> 00:58:40,960
I got to try to pick up a guy who put a hit on me there

1732
00:58:40,960 --> 00:58:41,440
Yeah I got

1733
00:58:41,440 --> 00:58:42,400
Yeah okay

1734
00:58:42,400 --> 00:58:43,040
I'm not kidding

1735
00:58:43,040 --> 00:58:43,760
He's so

1736
00:58:43,760 --> 00:58:45,520
You go to the barber shop a bunch of times

1737
00:58:45,520 --> 00:58:46,960
You're gonna get an air job

1738
00:58:46,960 --> 00:58:47,840
No no no

1739
00:58:47,840 --> 00:58:48,640
It's less than a hundred

1740
00:58:48,640 --> 00:58:49,760
We're to that bathroom

1741
00:58:49,760 --> 00:58:51,440
Yeah okay

1742
00:58:51,440 --> 00:58:53,200
Backwards the rest of the time

1743
00:58:53,200 --> 00:58:54,000
No I'm serious

1744
00:58:54,000 --> 00:59:00,000
Oh man

1745
00:59:00,000 --> 00:59:01,680
What do you, what do you laugh at?

1746
00:59:01,680 --> 00:59:03,360
You don't think a gay would hit on me?

1747
00:59:03,360 --> 00:59:05,200
Yes I do think a gay would hit on you

1748
00:59:05,200 --> 00:59:05,840
What happened?

1749
00:59:05,840 --> 00:59:07,120
And I said dude I'm not fucking fucking fucking

1750
00:59:07,120 --> 00:59:10,560
I said dude I will fucking knock you out right here man

1751
00:59:10,560 --> 00:59:11,600
Oh there you go

1752
00:59:11,600 --> 00:59:13,200
It's a real gay thing you said

1753
00:59:13,200 --> 00:59:14,560
I didn't say do it to him though

1754
00:59:14,560 --> 00:59:17,680
That just basically says are you into rough play?

1755
00:59:17,680 --> 00:59:19,600
No he said I'm right here

1756
00:59:19,600 --> 00:59:21,520
He's like I'll rough you up

1757
00:59:21,520 --> 00:59:22,320
Hey

1758
00:59:22,320 --> 00:59:24,240
You don't think a gay guy would hit on me?

1759
00:59:24,240 --> 00:59:24,880
Yeah

1760
00:59:24,880 --> 00:59:26,160
I'm gonna kick your ass

1761
00:59:26,160 --> 00:59:27,040
Yeah exactly

1762
00:59:27,040 --> 00:59:30,320
You gay guy will hit on you three times until you enjoy it

1763
00:59:30,320 --> 00:59:31,920
Oh then at the time I went to the gay woods

1764
00:59:31,920 --> 00:59:33,520
I told you this was a gay woods

1765
00:59:33,520 --> 00:59:34,880
A big gay woods

1766
00:59:34,880 --> 00:59:36,080
The gay woods

1767
00:59:36,080 --> 00:59:36,960
Big gay woods

1768
00:59:36,960 --> 00:59:37,840
In Bullingwood

1769
00:59:37,840 --> 00:59:38,640
It's in Bullingwood

1770
00:59:39,360 --> 00:59:40,480
I think it's only one day a week

1771
00:59:40,480 --> 00:59:42,080
It must have been like today I went there because

1772
00:59:42,800 --> 00:59:43,440
Well

1773
00:59:43,440 --> 00:59:44,560
How'd you know it was gay?

1774
00:59:44,560 --> 00:59:45,600
I didn't

1775
00:59:45,600 --> 00:59:46,240
I didn't

1776
00:59:46,240 --> 00:59:47,680
I'm driving around the day in my car

1777
00:59:47,680 --> 00:59:48,560
And I go to this you know

1778
00:59:49,200 --> 00:59:50,800
Woods it was like a forest reserve you know

1779
00:59:50,800 --> 00:59:53,200
And then there was a parking lot and a little path

1780
00:59:53,200 --> 00:59:54,160
A sign about the woods

1781
00:59:54,160 --> 00:59:55,840
And you walk out of the old school

1782
00:59:55,840 --> 00:59:56,960
You know I put my bike back here

1783
00:59:57,600 --> 00:59:59,600
So the following week I think it was a Tuesday

1784
00:59:59,600 --> 01:00:00,400
Whatever day

1785
01:00:00,400 --> 01:00:02,080
I get my bike I drive out to her

1786
01:00:02,080 --> 01:00:03,040
On a boy short day

1787
01:00:03,040 --> 01:00:05,520
Yeah he's like roller skates and boy shorts

1788
01:00:05,520 --> 01:00:07,680
I'm riding down this path

1789
01:00:07,680 --> 01:00:08,240
But I noticed

1790
01:00:08,240 --> 01:00:09,120
It's two and three sixties

1791
01:00:09,120 --> 01:00:12,160
Nothing but freaking men on this path man

1792
01:00:12,160 --> 01:00:13,520
Like in the bushes

1793
01:00:13,520 --> 01:00:14,880
In the bushes

1794
01:00:14,880 --> 01:00:15,520
Yeah yeah

1795
01:00:15,520 --> 01:00:16,000
What is it?

1796
01:00:16,000 --> 01:00:16,560
Wait a minute

1797
01:00:16,560 --> 01:00:16,720
What do you mean?

1798
01:00:16,720 --> 01:00:17,840
They're having sex these guys are

1799
01:00:17,840 --> 01:00:19,600
Together couples of men

1800
01:00:19,600 --> 01:00:21,200
Off in the bushes off the path

1801
01:00:21,200 --> 01:00:22,400
They're capulating in the bushes

1802
01:00:22,400 --> 01:00:23,040
Yes

1803
01:00:23,040 --> 01:00:23,680
Yes come on

1804
01:00:23,680 --> 01:00:25,920
And I'm riding along I feel maybe since you know

1805
01:00:25,920 --> 01:00:26,960
You're on your bike

1806
01:00:26,960 --> 01:00:27,280
Yes

1807
01:00:27,280 --> 01:00:28,320
Oh this is great

1808
01:00:28,320 --> 01:00:28,640
Yes

1809
01:00:28,640 --> 01:00:29,760
And I thought well you'll

1810
01:00:29,760 --> 01:00:30,960
A little tiny photo you know

1811
01:00:30,960 --> 01:00:31,600
Or the

1812
01:00:31,600 --> 01:00:33,120
Double sex is round of big deal

1813
01:00:33,120 --> 01:00:34,960
This is all the insects

1814
01:00:34,960 --> 01:00:35,920
One couple I thought okay

1815
01:00:35,920 --> 01:00:37,840
There's a gay couple one couple

1816
01:00:38,400 --> 01:00:39,840
But no it was like multiple

1817
01:00:39,840 --> 01:00:41,040
It's just you know I mean it kept that

1818
01:00:41,040 --> 01:00:42,480
As I rode along it was more and more and more

1819
01:00:42,480 --> 01:00:43,120
One dude

1820
01:00:43,120 --> 01:00:43,680
Two dudes

1821
01:00:43,680 --> 01:00:44,160
Right

1822
01:00:44,160 --> 01:00:47,840
It was just like nine dudes banging in the woods

1823
01:00:47,840 --> 01:00:50,400
It's the seven doors

1824
01:00:50,400 --> 01:00:51,840
Keep going keep going

1825
01:00:51,840 --> 01:00:53,600
Yeah you keep going and it keeps progressing

1826
01:00:53,600 --> 01:00:54,080
More and more

1827
01:00:54,080 --> 01:00:54,720
That's amazing

1828
01:00:54,720 --> 01:00:55,680
While you're riding your bike

1829
01:00:55,680 --> 01:00:56,560
No I bet you I turned around

1830
01:00:56,560 --> 01:00:57,200
Did you stop?

1831
01:00:57,200 --> 01:00:58,400
Yeah I bet you you turned around

1832
01:01:00,000 --> 01:01:01,920
And turned around and rode out backwards

1833
01:01:01,920 --> 01:01:06,640
Right through the gay woods

1834
01:01:06,640 --> 01:01:07,600
Of course not

1835
01:01:08,160 --> 01:01:10,240
That's amazing that there's gay woods

1836
01:01:10,240 --> 01:01:11,360
Well I knew it was about to happen

1837
01:01:11,360 --> 01:01:12,160
It's amazing

1838
01:01:12,160 --> 01:01:14,320
It's amazing that he found it and rode his bike

1839
01:01:14,320 --> 01:01:15,120
Yeah

1840
01:01:15,120 --> 01:01:16,400
And said he was on the back

1841
01:01:16,400 --> 01:01:16,880
On the accident

1842
01:01:16,880 --> 01:01:17,920
Again I didn't know

1843
01:01:17,920 --> 01:01:19,120
Exactly

1844
01:01:19,120 --> 01:01:20,080
That's the best part

1845
01:01:20,080 --> 01:01:20,640
Yeah

1846
01:01:20,640 --> 01:01:22,240
I got caught at the drug house

1847
01:01:22,240 --> 01:01:23,360
I didn't know what you were doing

1848
01:01:23,360 --> 01:01:24,720
F***ing gay woods

1849
01:01:25,680 --> 01:01:28,320
So I also rode with this gay fellow

1850
01:01:28,320 --> 01:01:29,040
I told him about it

1851
01:01:29,040 --> 01:01:30,800
He was a bulletin book as well Sam

1852
01:01:30,800 --> 01:01:32,480
And he was happy to tell them

1853
01:01:32,480 --> 01:01:33,120
Now you told him

1854
01:01:33,120 --> 01:01:33,920
These guys

1855
01:01:33,920 --> 01:01:34,720
He was happy to tell them

1856
01:01:34,720 --> 01:01:35,840
He started hanging out there

1857
01:01:35,840 --> 01:01:36,560
Oh Jesus

1858
01:01:36,560 --> 01:01:37,200
Yeah

1859
01:01:37,200 --> 01:01:39,120
He turned your co-worker gay

1860
01:01:39,120 --> 01:01:40,480
No he was gay for a long time

1861
01:01:40,480 --> 01:01:41,920
Yeah you just made him go man

1862
01:01:41,920 --> 01:01:43,040
He told him you were actually

1863
01:01:43,040 --> 01:01:43,520
Kissed him

1864
01:01:43,520 --> 01:01:44,160
He went to the gay woods

1865
01:01:44,160 --> 01:01:46,400
I found a big lurch for you Sam

1866
01:01:46,400 --> 01:01:47,360
Dude

1867
01:01:47,360 --> 01:01:49,200
You'll never guess what I found Sam

1868
01:01:49,200 --> 01:01:49,600
Yeah

1869
01:01:49,600 --> 01:01:50,400
I go Sam

1870
01:01:50,400 --> 01:01:54,000
This is like the holy grail of gay sex

1871
01:01:54,000 --> 01:01:55,120
I said Sam

1872
01:01:55,120 --> 01:01:56,800
Did you know about the gay woods?

1873
01:01:56,800 --> 01:01:57,680
You know like

1874
01:01:57,680 --> 01:01:59,440
Oh what gay woods?

1875
01:02:00,240 --> 01:02:01,120
Let me show you

1876
01:02:02,320 --> 01:02:03,200
I'm like it's over

1877
01:02:03,200 --> 01:02:05,120
I was a f***ing westerner

1878
01:02:05,120 --> 01:02:05,920
How about this

1879
01:02:05,920 --> 01:02:06,960
Here my brother

1880
01:02:06,960 --> 01:02:08,400
We also wear these outfits together

1881
01:02:08,400 --> 01:02:09,680
And then next week I see you guys

1882
01:02:09,680 --> 01:02:11,360
Hey thanks for telling me what's their place man

1883
01:02:11,360 --> 01:02:12,640
I go there all the time

1884
01:02:12,640 --> 01:02:14,960
Hey you guys are like this man

1885
01:02:14,960 --> 01:02:18,160
My brother is in Mexico with his girlfriend

1886
01:02:18,160 --> 01:02:21,120
And he sends a text back to the family text

1887
01:02:21,120 --> 01:02:23,440
With my mom, my dad, his kids

1888
01:02:23,440 --> 01:02:24,000
Oh yeah

1889
01:02:24,000 --> 01:02:24,480
Yeah

1890
01:02:24,480 --> 01:02:27,040
With two gay guys f***ing each other

1891
01:02:27,040 --> 01:02:29,760
In the middle of the street in Mexico

1892
01:02:29,760 --> 01:02:32,000
In the middle of the day and he's spilling

1893
01:02:32,000 --> 01:02:34,000
How many times have you been out?

1894
01:02:34,000 --> 01:02:36,720
And he sends it back to the family text

1895
01:02:36,720 --> 01:02:37,360
Why?

1896
01:02:37,360 --> 01:02:39,280
Because I was like what the f***

1897
01:02:39,280 --> 01:02:41,040
I was like he had like multiple angles and shit

1898
01:02:41,040 --> 01:02:42,480
And he was like walking down the stairs

1899
01:02:42,480 --> 01:02:43,840
I was like zooming in and out

1900
01:02:43,840 --> 01:02:46,400
And these bags are just swatching in the street

1901
01:02:46,400 --> 01:02:47,840
Larry garbage can

1902
01:02:47,840 --> 01:02:49,280
Garbage can man

1903
01:02:49,280 --> 01:02:51,200
Get the garbage can man

1904
01:02:51,200 --> 01:02:54,240
No don't throw up on the joint

1905
01:02:54,240 --> 01:02:56,000
Don't throw up on the joint

1906
01:02:56,000 --> 01:02:56,400
Dude

1907
01:02:56,400 --> 01:02:57,760
He's gonna put a few kind cameras

1908
01:02:57,760 --> 01:02:58,720
Move out of the way

1909
01:02:58,720 --> 01:02:59,760
Maybe he needs some water

1910
01:03:00,400 --> 01:03:01,360
Have you tried that?

1911
01:03:03,520 --> 01:03:04,800
The f*** are you doing?

1912
01:03:06,480 --> 01:03:08,240
This is a Larry and Neato shirt

1913
01:03:10,400 --> 01:03:12,240
Title my one and one quick

1914
01:03:12,240 --> 01:03:13,840
This is Larry and Neato shirt

1915
01:03:13,840 --> 01:03:15,040
Someone out there dialing

1916
01:03:15,040 --> 01:03:16,000
Oh my god

1917
01:03:16,000 --> 01:03:17,440
Like, follow, subscribe

1918
01:03:18,480 --> 01:03:19,440
Leave a comment

1919
01:03:24,320 --> 01:03:25,440
Hey I'll tell you man

1920
01:03:25,440 --> 01:03:26,320
I brought down

1921
01:03:26,320 --> 01:03:26,560
Oh you tell us man

1922
01:03:26,560 --> 01:03:28,480
I brought down about 20 beers

1923
01:03:28,480 --> 01:03:30,480
And I had about two or three of them

1924
01:03:30,480 --> 01:03:31,040
Oh man

1925
01:03:31,040 --> 01:03:32,720
And maybe Neato's had three of them

1926
01:03:32,720 --> 01:03:33,360
Hey I have three of them

1927
01:03:33,360 --> 01:03:36,080
This motherfucker drank 19 beers

1928
01:03:36,080 --> 01:03:36,560
Oh my god

1929
01:03:36,560 --> 01:03:38,480
He said 27 at one point

1930
01:03:39,920 --> 01:03:40,560
Oh f***

1931
01:03:40,560 --> 01:03:43,040
What the f*** is this all man?

1932
01:03:43,040 --> 01:03:45,760
From the land of skype waters

1933
01:03:45,760 --> 01:03:46,560
Come ham

1934
01:03:47,680 --> 01:03:48,560
Well you know what

1935
01:03:48,560 --> 01:03:49,200
Oh wait here we go

1936
01:03:49,200 --> 01:03:50,000
What's more gay?

1937
01:03:51,040 --> 01:03:51,600
Oh man

1938
01:03:52,320 --> 01:03:53,440
Holy f***

1939
01:03:53,440 --> 01:03:54,080
The gay would

1940
01:03:54,080 --> 01:03:54,800
By the way

1941
01:03:54,800 --> 01:03:56,560
If you can see this on camera

1942
01:03:56,560 --> 01:03:57,600
By the way people

1943
01:03:57,600 --> 01:03:59,120
My wife made this

1944
01:03:59,120 --> 01:03:59,760
She made this

1945
01:04:01,360 --> 01:04:03,200
My wife made this garbage can

1946
01:04:03,200 --> 01:04:05,680
Out of all pictures of rock stars and s***

1947
01:04:05,680 --> 01:04:07,120
And he's puking

1948
01:04:07,120 --> 01:04:08,080
And he's puking in it

1949
01:04:08,080 --> 01:04:08,720
I'm on there

1950
01:04:08,720 --> 01:04:09,520
I'm on there

1951
01:04:09,520 --> 01:04:11,200
Oh man

1952
01:04:11,200 --> 01:04:12,720
Oh dude

1953
01:04:12,720 --> 01:04:13,280
Oh dude

1954
01:04:13,280 --> 01:04:14,160
Oh

1955
01:04:16,160 --> 01:04:20,240
From the land of skype waters

1956
01:04:22,880 --> 01:04:23,520
Oh man

1957
01:04:23,520 --> 01:04:26,320
A rainbow tattoo or sucking toes

1958
01:04:26,320 --> 01:04:27,760
No a rainbow tattoo

1959
01:04:27,760 --> 01:04:28,480
Definitely a rainbow

1960
01:04:28,480 --> 01:04:30,240
That was a bad one I screwed up on that one

1961
01:04:30,240 --> 01:04:30,560
Yeah

1962
01:04:30,560 --> 01:04:32,560
I mean that was an easy one

1963
01:04:32,560 --> 01:04:33,280
Yeah I know

1964
01:04:33,280 --> 01:04:34,000
Excuse me

1965
01:04:34,000 --> 01:04:34,640
It's okay

1966
01:04:34,640 --> 01:04:35,600
I can't win them all

1967
01:04:35,600 --> 01:04:36,400
Aw man

1968
01:04:36,400 --> 01:04:37,600
Here buddy

1969
01:04:37,600 --> 01:04:39,600
Um

1970
01:04:42,080 --> 01:04:43,120
That one threw me off

1971
01:04:44,640 --> 01:04:45,280
Oh man

1972
01:04:45,280 --> 01:04:48,400
So many colors in the homo rainbow

1973
01:04:48,400 --> 01:04:50,400
Having a tiny pig or getting arrested

1974
01:04:51,840 --> 01:04:53,280
Having a tiny pig

1975
01:04:53,280 --> 01:04:55,200
Ah I think getting arrested is more gay

1976
01:04:56,640 --> 01:04:58,960
You're subjected maybe if you're a little twink

1977
01:04:58,960 --> 01:04:59,600
And you go in there

1978
01:04:59,600 --> 01:05:00,640
I'm just gonna use you

1979
01:05:03,200 --> 01:05:03,920
Well

1980
01:05:03,920 --> 01:05:05,280
I think it's more gays and

1981
01:05:06,080 --> 01:05:07,120
Well do you know what

1982
01:05:07,120 --> 01:05:08,240
We have kind of better

1983
01:05:08,240 --> 01:05:08,800
Can't help getting arrested

1984
01:05:08,800 --> 01:05:09,920
It's not by choice

1985
01:05:09,920 --> 01:05:10,960
Remember when you found that pig

1986
01:05:12,800 --> 01:05:14,480
Man do you have to talk about his left girl

1987
01:05:14,480 --> 01:05:15,360
For a leg body

1988
01:05:15,360 --> 01:05:15,920
I found this pig

1989
01:05:15,920 --> 01:05:16,560
No you did

1990
01:05:16,560 --> 01:05:17,440
When you found the pig

1991
01:05:17,440 --> 01:05:19,120
I got pulled over by the cops

1992
01:05:19,120 --> 01:05:20,000
And Medina rode right

1993
01:05:20,000 --> 01:05:20,960
Yeah and they said

1994
01:05:20,960 --> 01:05:22,480
Hey what do you do with this pig

1995
01:05:22,480 --> 01:05:23,680
I said I just found him

1996
01:05:23,680 --> 01:05:24,720
I don't know what to do with him

1997
01:05:24,720 --> 01:05:26,720
They said you better like bring him to the zoo

1998
01:05:26,720 --> 01:05:28,000
And I said okay

1999
01:05:28,000 --> 01:05:28,880
And then the next day

2000
01:05:28,880 --> 01:05:29,360
Just another bit

2001
01:05:29,920 --> 01:05:31,680
I got pulled over by the same guy

2002
01:05:31,680 --> 01:05:32,560
And he goes

2003
01:05:32,560 --> 01:05:33,600
What do you do with this pig

2004
01:05:33,600 --> 01:05:35,440
I thought I told you to bring him to the zoo

2005
01:05:35,440 --> 01:05:36,320
And I said

2006
01:05:36,320 --> 01:05:37,440
I did bring him to the zoo

2007
01:05:37,440 --> 01:05:38,320
He liked it so much

2008
01:05:38,320 --> 01:05:40,000
I'm gonna bring him to Disneyland now

2009
01:05:43,600 --> 01:05:45,440
They so much wanted to zoo together

2010
01:05:45,440 --> 01:05:46,400
That he won't

2011
01:05:46,400 --> 01:05:47,200
You're gonna take him to Disneyland

2012
01:05:47,200 --> 01:05:48,400
I did bring him to the zoo

2013
01:05:48,400 --> 01:05:49,520
He liked it so much

2014
01:05:49,520 --> 01:05:51,360
We're gonna bring him to Disneyland now

2015
01:05:52,400 --> 01:05:52,720
Geez

2016
01:05:53,680 --> 01:05:54,640
I know I understood it

2017
01:05:54,640 --> 01:05:55,360
But I just wanted to hear

2018
01:05:55,360 --> 01:05:56,880
I mean I really hope you drop that roach

2019
01:05:56,880 --> 01:05:58,560
And then it starts that jacket on fire

2020
01:05:58,560 --> 01:06:00,960
How about though when George did find the pig

2021
01:06:00,960 --> 01:06:02,480
This jacket is not gonna burn

2022
01:06:02,480 --> 01:06:03,440
We had a guy with a board

2023
01:06:03,440 --> 01:06:04,000
Remember when you

2024
01:06:04,000 --> 01:06:04,800
I know George

2025
01:06:04,800 --> 01:06:05,840
And I know the board

2026
01:06:05,840 --> 01:06:07,520
And we've talked about it before

2027
01:06:07,520 --> 01:06:08,640
There's a rhyme for you

2028
01:06:09,280 --> 01:06:10,560
That was insane man

2029
01:06:10,560 --> 01:06:10,960
Well no

2030
01:06:11,840 --> 01:06:13,120
It literally had tusks

2031
01:06:13,120 --> 01:06:14,800
And it would tear us fucking

2032
01:06:14,800 --> 01:06:15,840
He was said to saw

2033
01:06:15,840 --> 01:06:16,960
And it was huge

2034
01:06:16,960 --> 01:06:17,600
It had to

2035
01:06:17,600 --> 01:06:18,160
Huge

2036
01:06:18,160 --> 01:06:19,360
Very dangerous dude

2037
01:06:19,360 --> 01:06:19,920
Especially when they want to fuck

2038
01:06:19,920 --> 01:06:22,080
Tore that place a fucking part man

2039
01:06:22,080 --> 01:06:24,480
Wild animals were not meant to be kept indoors

2040
01:06:24,480 --> 01:06:24,960
No way

2041
01:06:24,960 --> 01:06:26,640
Especially 500 pound boars

2042
01:06:26,640 --> 01:06:27,280
Yes

2043
01:06:27,280 --> 01:06:27,760
Exactly

2044
01:06:27,760 --> 01:06:29,680
That thing took up a whole fucking room

2045
01:06:29,680 --> 01:06:30,720
Dude this fucking thing

2046
01:06:30,720 --> 01:06:32,080
In a residential house

2047
01:06:32,080 --> 01:06:32,400
At the end of the house

2048
01:06:32,400 --> 01:06:33,600
It was not the house

2049
01:06:33,600 --> 01:06:34,560
Need to be torn down

2050
01:06:34,560 --> 01:06:35,360
Sorry George

2051
01:06:35,360 --> 01:06:36,320
I love you

2052
01:06:36,320 --> 01:06:38,080
Oh it's actually

2053
01:06:38,080 --> 01:06:39,120
Farerly

2054
01:06:39,120 --> 01:06:40,240
Worse than it's ever been

2055
01:06:40,240 --> 01:06:41,760
Hey remember when we brought Ava there

2056
01:06:41,760 --> 01:06:42,800
And she like you know

2057
01:06:43,840 --> 01:06:45,040
She's like he was nuts

2058
01:06:45,040 --> 01:06:46,320
He goes hey you wanted me

2059
01:06:46,320 --> 01:06:47,440
Make big and she's like

2060
01:06:47,440 --> 01:06:48,400
This is a bore

2061
01:06:48,400 --> 01:06:49,360
This is a bore

2062
01:06:49,360 --> 01:06:50,240
It's very dangerous

2063
01:06:50,240 --> 01:06:51,600
You guys it's a bore

2064
01:06:51,600 --> 01:06:53,280
Get away from that thing she's saying

2065
01:06:54,480 --> 01:06:55,680
Then she wants you about of course

2066
01:06:55,680 --> 01:06:57,280
Honey your friend with that bore

2067
01:06:57,840 --> 01:07:00,320
In one time that motherfucker bit him in the foot

2068
01:07:00,320 --> 01:07:02,960
And he's wearing like thick work boots and shit

2069
01:07:02,960 --> 01:07:04,400
And it drew blood

2070
01:07:04,400 --> 01:07:05,920
Through his fucking nose

2071
01:07:05,920 --> 01:07:07,680
Oh they're deadly dudes don't fucking

2072
01:07:07,680 --> 01:07:08,960
Break your bone with their teeth

2073
01:07:08,960 --> 01:07:09,760
Yeah

2074
01:07:09,760 --> 01:07:10,400
Yeah

2075
01:07:10,400 --> 01:07:11,120
They're huge

2076
01:07:13,680 --> 01:07:14,240
They are

2077
01:07:14,240 --> 01:07:15,600
I mean you shouldn't like I just said

2078
01:07:15,600 --> 01:07:17,120
You shouldn't have wild animals in your house

2079
01:07:17,120 --> 01:07:18,160
No he was ridiculous

2080
01:07:18,160 --> 01:07:19,920
I mean there's a certain law

2081
01:07:19,920 --> 01:07:21,440
I mean we know people that have had

2082
01:07:21,440 --> 01:07:23,440
Coat like snakes and shit

2083
01:07:23,440 --> 01:07:24,480
Vendomous snakes

2084
01:07:24,480 --> 01:07:25,520
I love those guys too

2085
01:07:25,520 --> 01:07:26,240
Yeah with the

2086
01:07:26,240 --> 01:07:27,520
And then they think that they're okay with them

2087
01:07:27,520 --> 01:07:29,280
They're not gonna hurt them or something like

2088
01:07:29,280 --> 01:07:31,200
Timmy had all of them venomous snakes

2089
01:07:31,920 --> 01:07:33,360
He's like hey man

2090
01:07:33,360 --> 01:07:34,400
Oh hi I'm dope

2091
01:07:34,400 --> 01:07:35,920
Dude I fucking try to sleep there

2092
01:07:35,920 --> 01:07:37,920
I don't mean full speed my snakes he tells me

2093
01:07:37,920 --> 01:07:40,480
I'm like what are you crazy I'm not doing that

2094
01:07:40,480 --> 01:07:42,640
He's like dude I would never

2095
01:07:43,440 --> 01:07:45,520
Allow one of my snakes to bite you

2096
01:07:45,520 --> 01:07:48,000
And I'm like how in the fuck are you gonna stop

2097
01:07:48,000 --> 01:07:48,800
A rattlesnake

2098
01:07:48,800 --> 01:07:50,560
Dude you can't even keep your head up motherfucker

2099
01:07:51,680 --> 01:07:53,040
You're in the toilet

2100
01:07:53,040 --> 01:07:54,720
We're not even by the snake's

2101
01:07:54,720 --> 01:07:56,160
It's a little faster than you're ever gonna be

2102
01:07:56,160 --> 01:07:57,440
The fuck's going on here

2103
01:07:59,680 --> 01:08:00,960
What do you think I'm gonna do

2104
01:08:00,960 --> 01:08:02,640
I mean these people they get lions and wonder why

2105
01:08:02,640 --> 01:08:04,240
You still have a needle in your arm

2106
01:08:04,240 --> 01:08:04,880
Come on man

2107
01:08:04,880 --> 01:08:05,680
Exactly

2108
01:08:05,680 --> 01:08:07,280
Yeah I have Steve early

2109
01:08:07,280 --> 01:08:10,560
You're like dude I'm not let the snakes bite you

2110
01:08:10,560 --> 01:08:11,440
Yeah okay man

2111
01:08:11,440 --> 01:08:14,160
So one night me and Mary are there and we're all partying

2112
01:08:14,160 --> 01:08:16,800
And there's about fucking five six people there

2113
01:08:16,800 --> 01:08:17,920
Besides me and Mary

2114
01:08:18,480 --> 01:08:21,040
And he's like oh hey by the way everybody

2115
01:08:21,040 --> 01:08:21,920
If you see a rattlesnake

2116
01:08:21,920 --> 01:08:24,800
Be real careful because one of my rattlesnakes

2117
01:08:24,800 --> 01:08:25,520
Got out of this

2118
01:08:25,520 --> 01:08:26,080
Yeah don't hurt them

2119
01:08:26,080 --> 01:08:26,560
You don't step on them

2120
01:08:26,560 --> 01:08:28,480
Cage and I can't find them

2121
01:08:28,480 --> 01:08:29,760
And I'm sitting on these weird video calls

2122
01:08:29,760 --> 01:08:32,000
Yeah right up the fucking door later

2123
01:08:32,000 --> 01:08:33,280
Everyone jumps up

2124
01:08:33,280 --> 01:08:35,280
Oh my god

2125
01:08:35,280 --> 01:08:36,880
What are you talking about

2126
01:08:36,880 --> 01:08:38,720
Everybody gets comfortable

2127
01:08:38,720 --> 01:08:40,960
And then you tell them that you have a loose rattlesnake

2128
01:08:41,680 --> 01:08:42,800
You're fucking

2129
01:08:42,800 --> 01:08:44,240
I mean that's the first thing you should say

2130
01:08:44,240 --> 01:08:45,280
When they open the door

2131
01:08:45,280 --> 01:08:46,720
One of my snakes got out

2132
01:08:46,720 --> 01:08:48,880
You might not know

2133
01:08:48,880 --> 01:08:49,360
I wouldn't

2134
01:08:49,360 --> 01:08:51,040
I shouldn't come in right now

2135
01:08:51,040 --> 01:08:51,760
Yeah

2136
01:08:51,760 --> 01:08:53,680
Emily and I are you know

2137
01:08:53,680 --> 01:08:55,360
Dealing with some cleaning issues

2138
01:08:56,320 --> 01:08:57,920
There's a loose rattlesnake

2139
01:08:57,920 --> 01:08:58,400
Yeah

2140
01:08:58,400 --> 01:08:59,760
So yeah and uh

2141
01:08:59,760 --> 01:09:00,960
I slept there one night

2142
01:09:00,960 --> 01:09:02,080
And you could hear them right

2143
01:09:02,080 --> 01:09:03,200
Well I didn't sleep there

2144
01:09:03,200 --> 01:09:04,400
I laid down

2145
01:09:04,400 --> 01:09:04,960
Yeah

2146
01:09:04,960 --> 01:09:05,600
Yeah

2147
01:09:05,600 --> 01:09:06,400
And it was

2148
01:09:06,400 --> 01:09:07,760
I thought you were gonna sleep there

2149
01:09:07,760 --> 01:09:08,480
Dude

2150
01:09:08,480 --> 01:09:10,240
The cages with lights

2151
01:09:10,240 --> 01:09:10,960
There were fucking

2152
01:09:11,920 --> 01:09:12,720
Five foot high

2153
01:09:12,720 --> 01:09:14,000
Six foot high at some points

2154
01:09:14,000 --> 01:09:15,840
With different snakes in them

2155
01:09:15,840 --> 01:09:17,440
Like venomous snakes

2156
01:09:17,440 --> 01:09:17,760
Yeah

2157
01:09:17,760 --> 01:09:18,160
Right yeah

2158
01:09:18,160 --> 01:09:19,280
Yeah you'd do a Debbie animal

2159
01:09:19,280 --> 01:09:20,320
Stacked with uh

2160
01:09:20,320 --> 01:09:21,200
Stacked in uh

2161
01:09:22,320 --> 01:09:23,440
Sweater boxes

2162
01:09:23,440 --> 01:09:24,320
Those plastic

2163
01:09:24,320 --> 01:09:26,160
Yeah some of them are lured

2164
01:09:26,160 --> 01:09:27,520
Dude he would keep them in those

2165
01:09:27,520 --> 01:09:29,920
Sweater boxes and poke holes in the top

2166
01:09:29,920 --> 01:09:30,800
Yeah and why though

2167
01:09:30,800 --> 01:09:31,600
And for what reason

2168
01:09:31,600 --> 01:09:32,560
What was it what was it

2169
01:09:32,560 --> 01:09:33,520
Because he wanted to get bit

2170
01:09:34,160 --> 01:09:35,360
He would walk around here

2171
01:09:35,360 --> 01:09:36,400
I mean would he give it to you

2172
01:09:36,400 --> 01:09:38,400
All mothed out at night and fucking

2173
01:09:38,400 --> 01:09:39,200
Pick up snakes

2174
01:09:39,200 --> 01:09:40,160
Yeah

2175
01:09:40,160 --> 01:09:41,920
We used to have kids with little brothers

2176
01:09:41,920 --> 01:09:42,800
Walk around the backpack

2177
01:09:42,800 --> 01:09:44,240
And put them in the backpack

2178
01:09:44,240 --> 01:09:45,840
And come home with 15 to 20 feet

2179
01:09:45,840 --> 01:09:47,200
Put one of them on a train

2180
01:09:47,200 --> 01:09:48,000
That would be funny

2181
01:09:48,720 --> 01:09:49,920
Snakes on a train

2182
01:09:50,880 --> 01:09:52,080
When I got stuck out there

2183
01:09:52,080 --> 01:09:52,960
I had to walk back

2184
01:09:52,960 --> 01:09:54,240
And you could hear these rattlers

2185
01:09:54,240 --> 01:09:56,240
Man I've been boat shoes and cut off shorts

2186
01:09:56,800 --> 01:09:58,000
Walking through the fucking desert

2187
01:09:58,000 --> 01:09:58,800
And you I hear these things

2188
01:09:58,800 --> 01:10:01,280
And you think I ain't dressed for this

2189
01:10:01,280 --> 01:10:02,240
Not at all man

2190
01:10:04,320 --> 01:10:05,840
Talk about being unprepared

2191
01:10:05,840 --> 01:10:07,200
I wish I had some kind of

2192
01:10:07,200 --> 01:10:09,760
Fucking steel toe boots and long pants

2193
01:10:10,240 --> 01:10:10,800
Yeah

2194
01:10:10,800 --> 01:10:12,320
Or we should have just more than a fucking

2195
01:10:12,320 --> 01:10:14,720
Don't climb too high and climb it up high

2196
01:10:16,480 --> 01:10:18,160
All right supporting Hamas

2197
01:10:18,160 --> 01:10:19,280
Or riding a scooter

2198
01:10:20,240 --> 01:10:20,960
Oh man

2199
01:10:22,400 --> 01:10:23,520
Definitely Hamas

2200
01:10:25,040 --> 01:10:26,480
Sweaters are not gay

2201
01:10:26,480 --> 01:10:27,920
Yeah you shouldn't support Hamas

2202
01:10:27,920 --> 01:10:29,600
But we really can't let it is

2203
01:10:29,600 --> 01:10:30,240
You don't take

2204
01:10:30,240 --> 01:10:31,920
I know scooters either

2205
01:10:31,920 --> 01:10:32,960
What's more gay though

2206
01:10:32,960 --> 01:10:34,560
Riding a scooter or supporting Hamas

2207
01:10:34,560 --> 01:10:35,360
Scooters are pretty gay

2208
01:10:35,360 --> 01:10:36,080
And force

2209
01:10:36,080 --> 01:10:37,360
Donnie Enforced is a

2210
01:10:37,360 --> 01:10:39,520
I thought big fucking Frank DeBeard

2211
01:10:39,520 --> 01:10:40,720
Was going to be playing with us

2212
01:10:40,720 --> 01:10:41,280
But obviously

2213
01:10:41,280 --> 01:10:43,440
I mean a scooter is pretty gay all in all

2214
01:10:44,080 --> 01:10:44,880
Let me guys admit

2215
01:10:46,320 --> 01:10:47,120
It is

2216
01:10:47,120 --> 01:10:48,560
But I mean supporting Hamas

2217
01:10:48,560 --> 01:10:49,200
That's just

2218
01:10:49,200 --> 01:10:51,840
I could see a lot of gays doing that too

2219
01:10:51,840 --> 01:10:52,400
What's that

2220
01:10:52,400 --> 01:10:53,360
Supporting Hamas

2221
01:10:53,360 --> 01:10:54,560
Well yeah because they don't realize

2222
01:10:54,560 --> 01:10:55,440
What the hell is going on

2223
01:10:55,440 --> 01:10:56,160
Right exactly

2224
01:10:56,160 --> 01:10:56,800
The best part is

2225
01:10:56,800 --> 01:10:59,040
Back to our repealing the 19th Amendment

2226
01:10:59,040 --> 01:11:01,600
Which I stand by as an American

2227
01:11:01,600 --> 01:11:02,800
Women should not vote

2228
01:11:02,800 --> 01:11:03,920
And here's the other thing

2229
01:11:03,920 --> 01:11:05,120
Oh that fucked everything up

2230
01:11:08,240 --> 01:11:11,520
Man I forgot Donnie Enforced was to my left

2231
01:11:11,520 --> 01:11:12,080
When I said that

2232
01:11:12,080 --> 01:11:13,840
I got all patriotic for a minute

2233
01:11:13,840 --> 01:11:14,400
What's that

2234
01:11:14,400 --> 01:11:15,280
Put them to work too

2235
01:11:15,280 --> 01:11:16,080
Let them do their job

2236
01:11:16,080 --> 01:11:17,120
No they have to work

2237
01:11:17,120 --> 01:11:17,440
I mean

2238
01:11:17,440 --> 01:11:18,880
Yeah but no I messed you up dude

2239
01:11:18,880 --> 01:11:20,080
You gotta pull your weight

2240
01:11:20,080 --> 01:11:21,440
We don't want no dead boy

2241
01:11:21,440 --> 01:11:22,880
I mean that was very

2242
01:11:23,600 --> 01:11:25,280
Fatishism or what is it called

2243
01:11:25,280 --> 01:11:26,240
Rashes

2244
01:11:26,240 --> 01:11:27,120
No no no

2245
01:11:27,120 --> 01:11:27,920
Weight shaming

2246
01:11:28,640 --> 01:11:29,680
You gotta pull your weight

2247
01:11:30,240 --> 01:11:31,040
You gotta fucking

2248
01:11:31,040 --> 01:11:32,320
We don't want no dead weight

2249
01:11:35,840 --> 01:11:37,920
We don't even know dead wood floating around

2250
01:11:38,960 --> 01:11:40,560
What's better than one dead hooker

2251
01:11:41,440 --> 01:11:42,240
Two

2252
01:11:42,240 --> 01:11:42,560
Yeah

2253
01:11:44,560 --> 01:11:46,160
I mean I guess great to get jobs

2254
01:11:46,160 --> 01:11:48,080
I understand that you have to support themselves sure

2255
01:11:48,800 --> 01:11:49,280
Well I mean

2256
01:11:49,280 --> 01:11:50,720
They've changed things

2257
01:11:50,720 --> 01:11:52,960
It's kind of swayed things a different way that

2258
01:11:52,960 --> 01:11:54,320
I was just sort of a joke

2259
01:11:54,320 --> 01:11:55,360
Oh boy here we go

2260
01:11:55,360 --> 01:11:56,960
How do you keep

2261
01:11:59,120 --> 01:12:01,840
One hooker from telling about the dead hooker

2262
01:12:02,800 --> 01:12:03,040
What

2263
01:12:04,080 --> 01:12:04,800
Wait a minute

2264
01:12:04,800 --> 01:12:05,440
What did you get

2265
01:12:05,440 --> 01:12:07,840
How do you keep the live hooker talking about

2266
01:12:08,400 --> 01:12:10,400
Talking about the dead hooker

2267
01:12:10,400 --> 01:12:11,040
Wait a second

2268
01:12:11,040 --> 01:12:11,600
Wait a minute

2269
01:12:11,600 --> 01:12:12,480
Wait a minute

2270
01:12:12,480 --> 01:12:13,040
Slow it down

2271
01:12:13,040 --> 01:12:15,360
How do you keep the live hooker quiet

2272
01:12:15,360 --> 01:12:16,560
About the dead hooker

2273
01:12:16,560 --> 01:12:18,800
Okay I mean you're just gonna keep on crafting this joke

2274
01:12:18,800 --> 01:12:19,520
Let's get there

2275
01:12:19,520 --> 01:12:20,000
Come on

2276
01:12:20,000 --> 01:12:20,560
I'm there

2277
01:12:20,560 --> 01:12:21,040
How do you

2278
01:12:21,040 --> 01:12:21,520
That's it

2279
01:12:21,520 --> 01:12:22,880
That's their point

2280
01:12:22,880 --> 01:12:25,120
How do you keep the live hooker

2281
01:12:25,120 --> 01:12:28,560
How do you stop a live hooker from talking about the dead hooker

2282
01:12:28,560 --> 01:12:28,960
How

2283
01:12:28,960 --> 01:12:29,520
You kill her

2284
01:12:32,640 --> 01:12:34,000
It's like two can keep a secret

2285
01:12:34,000 --> 01:12:35,200
You're a real pimp bro

2286
01:12:35,200 --> 01:12:36,160
Two of them are dead

2287
01:12:36,160 --> 01:12:37,760
It's a simple fucking equation

2288
01:12:37,760 --> 01:12:38,720
They're a real pimp there

2289
01:12:38,720 --> 01:12:39,760
Well no I just

2290
01:12:41,440 --> 01:12:42,480
It's a joke man

2291
01:12:42,480 --> 01:12:42,800
I was

2292
01:12:42,800 --> 01:12:44,400
Oh because you're a fucking kid

2293
01:12:44,400 --> 01:12:46,240
You're a fucking comedian with that jacket on right now

2294
01:12:47,920 --> 01:12:48,560
Sometimes

2295
01:12:48,560 --> 01:12:50,400
Wisconsin you had the other quote on

2296
01:12:50,400 --> 01:12:51,600
Your grandfather's coat

2297
01:12:51,600 --> 01:12:53,440
And the kid making fun of his coat

2298
01:12:53,440 --> 01:12:54,000
Had a quote

2299
01:12:54,000 --> 01:12:55,200
With every flag

2300
01:12:55,200 --> 01:12:57,200
God he's coat you've ever seen

2301
01:12:59,600 --> 01:13:00,240
What's happened

2302
01:13:00,240 --> 01:13:01,600
When you patched his shirt

2303
01:13:01,600 --> 01:13:02,880
It's all patched colors

2304
01:13:02,880 --> 01:13:03,200
Yeah

2305
01:13:03,200 --> 01:13:04,160
Look at the patched colors

2306
01:13:04,160 --> 01:13:04,320
Yeah

2307
01:13:04,320 --> 01:13:04,960
There's nothing wrong with that

2308
01:13:04,960 --> 01:13:07,920
I had this long fucking tweed jacket

2309
01:13:07,920 --> 01:13:09,760
Down to my feet with a fur collar

2310
01:13:09,760 --> 01:13:10,560
A nice tweed coat

2311
01:13:10,560 --> 01:13:12,240
And this whole chunk Indian guy

2312
01:13:12,240 --> 01:13:12,560
That was

2313
01:13:12,560 --> 01:13:13,120
A whole chunk

2314
01:13:13,120 --> 01:13:13,680
Giant

2315
01:13:13,680 --> 01:13:14,720
Well that was his friend

2316
01:13:14,720 --> 01:13:15,280
Yeah

2317
01:13:15,280 --> 01:13:18,240
Says to me that jacket's pretty funny and shit

2318
01:13:18,240 --> 01:13:19,920
And I had this big beard going on

2319
01:13:19,920 --> 01:13:21,200
And you can't handle your alcohol

2320
01:13:21,200 --> 01:13:22,240
You totally

2321
01:13:22,240 --> 01:13:23,520
No I could back then

2322
01:13:23,520 --> 01:13:25,120
No I'm talking about the Indian

2323
01:13:25,120 --> 01:13:25,600
Oh yeah

2324
01:13:25,600 --> 01:13:27,200
Jesus man

2325
01:13:27,200 --> 01:13:29,760
He started to stand up and just kept going

2326
01:13:29,760 --> 01:13:31,120
It was like an elevator man

2327
01:13:31,120 --> 01:13:32,720
We watched that guy rise for like a

2328
01:13:32,720 --> 01:13:33,920
Hey can't get a beer

2329
01:13:33,920 --> 01:13:34,960
And I'd say to him

2330
01:13:34,960 --> 01:13:35,760
My jacket

2331
01:13:35,760 --> 01:13:37,520
Look at your fucking jacket

2332
01:13:37,520 --> 01:13:39,760
And then he'd go sit out laughing and bought me a drink

2333
01:13:39,760 --> 01:13:40,640
Made of scalps

2334
01:13:40,640 --> 01:13:41,840
Was it just all scalps

2335
01:13:41,840 --> 01:13:42,560
No no no

2336
01:13:42,560 --> 01:13:43,280
It was all like

2337
01:13:43,280 --> 01:13:45,040
You know you ever see those leather jackets

2338
01:13:45,040 --> 01:13:47,040
With like every country flag

2339
01:13:47,040 --> 01:13:48,080
Sewed on it

2340
01:13:48,080 --> 01:13:48,480
Yeah

2341
01:13:48,480 --> 01:13:49,040
In leather

2342
01:13:49,760 --> 01:13:50,560
That's what he had

2343
01:13:50,560 --> 01:13:51,760
Okay can't get a beer

2344
01:13:51,760 --> 01:13:52,560
Um

2345
01:13:52,560 --> 01:13:54,560
But it wasn't a toilet with a jacket

2346
01:13:54,560 --> 01:13:55,600
And I'm not driving tonight so that's why I'm here

2347
01:13:55,600 --> 01:13:57,120
Larry can I get another beer please

2348
01:13:57,120 --> 01:13:58,080
Dude

2349
01:13:58,080 --> 01:13:59,200
Dude what

2350
01:13:59,200 --> 01:14:00,480
You want to fucking fight

2351
01:14:01,280 --> 01:14:02,720
You lucky Frank's stopping me

2352
01:14:04,240 --> 01:14:06,000
There's no example of a giant for you

2353
01:14:07,040 --> 01:14:07,360
What

2354
01:14:07,360 --> 01:14:08,880
That's not as Indian we see

2355
01:14:08,880 --> 01:14:09,840
Yeah he was big

2356
01:14:10,480 --> 01:14:11,200
Who

2357
01:14:11,200 --> 01:14:13,600
He was like big chief from Cuckoo's Nest

2358
01:14:13,600 --> 01:14:14,320
Ooh

2359
01:14:14,320 --> 01:14:15,600
Yeah he was fucking tall

2360
01:14:15,600 --> 01:14:16,400
He was a big fucking fucker

2361
01:14:16,400 --> 01:14:17,760
The sink through the window and he

2362
01:14:18,800 --> 01:14:19,680
Yeah yeah yeah

2363
01:14:19,680 --> 01:14:21,040
This guy just kept standing man

2364
01:14:21,040 --> 01:14:22,640
He was like

2365
01:14:22,640 --> 01:14:23,680
Yeah I'm like oh my god

2366
01:14:23,680 --> 01:14:25,120
I gotta do some talking here

2367
01:14:25,120 --> 01:14:26,240
Well it's just a big one

2368
01:14:26,240 --> 01:14:27,440
Dude dude think when he's out

2369
01:14:28,560 --> 01:14:30,400
But fucking Ken Casey wrote that

2370
01:14:31,680 --> 01:14:32,240
Right

2371
01:14:32,240 --> 01:14:32,480
I don't know

2372
01:14:32,480 --> 01:14:33,520
One through Fulham Flu

2373
01:14:33,520 --> 01:14:35,520
I think it was Ken Casey that wrote it

2374
01:14:35,520 --> 01:14:36,960
And basically

2375
01:14:36,960 --> 01:14:37,680
He was MK

2376
01:14:38,480 --> 01:14:39,760
He was MK Ultra

2377
01:14:39,760 --> 01:14:40,560
Yeah probably

2378
01:14:40,560 --> 01:14:42,240
Yeah no he was tied into the whole

2379
01:14:42,240 --> 01:14:44,400
LSD scene with Berkeley and shit

2380
01:14:44,400 --> 01:14:45,600
With the Grateful Dead

2381
01:14:45,600 --> 01:14:46,080
Yeah

2382
01:14:46,080 --> 01:14:47,760
Fucking all those Huxley

2383
01:14:47,760 --> 01:14:48,000
Oh yeah

2384
01:14:48,000 --> 01:14:49,120
Or not Huxley um

2385
01:14:49,120 --> 01:14:49,840
Yeah

2386
01:14:49,840 --> 01:14:50,720
Who's the other guy

2387
01:14:51,760 --> 01:14:52,000
Fuck

2388
01:14:52,800 --> 01:14:53,680
Timothy Leary

2389
01:14:53,680 --> 01:14:54,320
That's who it was

2390
01:14:54,320 --> 01:14:55,040
Yeah yeah

2391
01:14:55,040 --> 01:14:57,120
The whole tune in and fucking drop out

2392
01:14:57,120 --> 01:14:59,520
Drop out but it was taken all wrong

2393
01:15:00,400 --> 01:15:00,560
So

2394
01:15:00,560 --> 01:15:01,920
All right I'd like to thank God

2395
01:15:02,560 --> 01:15:03,120
Jesus

2396
01:15:04,080 --> 01:15:04,720
Shout out God

2397
01:15:04,720 --> 01:15:05,600
Shout out Jesus

2398
01:15:05,600 --> 01:15:08,000
And smash you all with the Holy Spirit

2399
01:15:08,000 --> 01:15:08,720
Yeah right in your ass

2400
01:15:10,400 --> 01:15:11,920
Of course Alex my nephew

2401
01:15:11,920 --> 01:15:13,760
Thanks Charlie for helping us do this

2402
01:15:13,760 --> 01:15:14,240
Shit show

2403
01:15:14,800 --> 01:15:15,520
Jeff out there

2404
01:15:15,520 --> 01:15:16,080
Slow down

2405
01:15:16,080 --> 01:15:16,640
Slow down

2406
01:15:16,640 --> 01:15:18,480
Who'd you just shout out after shorty

2407
01:15:18,480 --> 01:15:19,280
My brother

2408
01:15:19,280 --> 01:15:20,560
No shirt Nick put a shirt on

2409
01:15:21,760 --> 01:15:23,280
Jeff and Rockford

2410
01:15:23,280 --> 01:15:23,840
Jeff

2411
01:15:23,840 --> 01:15:25,680
Stoney out in Rockford

2412
01:15:25,680 --> 01:15:26,240
Stoney

2413
01:15:26,960 --> 01:15:28,480
My he's a band member

2414
01:15:28,480 --> 01:15:29,680
I know Stoney Bologna

2415
01:15:29,680 --> 01:15:30,240
Bobby

2416
01:15:30,240 --> 01:15:31,280
I need to talk to Stoney

2417
01:15:31,280 --> 01:15:32,960
Steamboat man love you brother

2418
01:15:33,520 --> 01:15:33,920
Frank

2419
01:15:34,880 --> 01:15:35,920
It was fun man

2420
01:15:37,360 --> 01:15:38,000
I'm tired

2421
01:15:39,040 --> 01:15:41,440
All right you keep saying take in the nap y'all

2422
01:15:41,440 --> 01:15:42,240
Great job friend

2423
01:15:43,120 --> 01:15:44,080
Kiki

2424
01:15:44,080 --> 01:15:44,720
Love you Kiki

2425
01:15:44,720 --> 01:15:44,960
My dad

2426
01:15:44,960 --> 01:15:46,080
You still a Pollock

2427
01:15:46,080 --> 01:15:47,200
Shout out Big Joe

2428
01:15:47,200 --> 01:15:48,080
Grow Joe

2429
01:15:48,080 --> 01:15:50,560
Grow Joe a stupid puppet I wish would burn up

2430
01:15:51,440 --> 01:15:51,840
Chris

2431
01:15:52,560 --> 01:15:53,360
Chris love you Chris

2432
01:15:53,360 --> 01:15:54,560
Hope you're better boobs

2433
01:15:54,560 --> 01:15:55,600
Matt you're still gay

2434
01:15:55,600 --> 01:15:56,240
Ross

2435
01:15:56,240 --> 01:15:57,200
Ross love you brother

2436
01:15:57,200 --> 01:15:57,600
Dave

2437
01:15:58,800 --> 01:15:59,440
So what do you ask

2438
01:15:59,440 --> 01:16:01,120
Oh wait Dave thanks for the gun brother

2439
01:16:01,120 --> 01:16:04,160
And the for hey stop hitting the mic you fucking ass

2440
01:16:04,160 --> 01:16:05,280
Oh what are you doing

2441
01:16:05,280 --> 01:16:06,000
Is that coming in

2442
01:16:06,000 --> 01:16:06,480
I am here

2443
01:16:06,480 --> 01:16:07,040
Yeah dude

2444
01:16:07,040 --> 01:16:08,000
Fucking elbow drop you

2445
01:16:08,000 --> 01:16:09,280
What do you mean is it coming in

2446
01:16:09,280 --> 01:16:10,880
You're hitting the mic from all the way

2447
01:16:10,880 --> 01:16:11,360
Fucking ass

2448
01:16:11,360 --> 01:16:11,600
Two

2449
01:16:12,480 --> 01:16:14,480
Hey no I'm gonna use the fucking

2450
01:16:14,480 --> 01:16:16,320
Dude where did you say

2451
01:16:16,320 --> 01:16:17,600
Don't you just cry out of the guy

2452
01:16:17,600 --> 01:16:18,160
And yeah

2453
01:16:19,920 --> 01:16:21,280
That's leaving you alone

2454
01:16:21,280 --> 01:16:23,440
Yeah leave me alone don't cry for me

2455
01:16:23,440 --> 01:16:24,960
Kizoniak

2456
01:16:24,960 --> 01:16:25,920
Mr. X

2457
01:16:26,480 --> 01:16:27,120
Mary

2458
01:16:27,120 --> 01:16:27,760
Mr. X

2459
01:16:28,400 --> 01:16:29,040
Helena

2460
01:16:29,040 --> 01:16:29,840
Love it

2461
01:16:29,840 --> 01:16:30,640
Sherry

2462
01:16:30,640 --> 01:16:31,680
Sherry love you

2463
01:16:31,680 --> 01:16:32,320
Yay

2464
01:16:32,320 --> 01:16:33,280
I still want to wrestle you

2465
01:16:33,280 --> 01:16:34,080
Chrissy

2466
01:16:34,080 --> 01:16:34,560
Love you

2467
01:16:34,560 --> 01:16:35,360
Becky

2468
01:16:35,360 --> 01:16:36,000
Love you

2469
01:16:36,000 --> 01:16:36,640
Tiffany

2470
01:16:36,640 --> 01:16:37,040
Love you

2471
01:16:37,040 --> 01:16:37,520
Oh

2472
01:16:37,520 --> 01:16:37,920
Georgie

2473
01:16:37,920 --> 01:16:39,760
Don't get that transitional surgery

2474
01:16:40,400 --> 01:16:42,560
Yeah Georgie out there in Colorado

2475
01:16:42,560 --> 01:16:42,800
Yep

2476
01:16:43,680 --> 01:16:44,560
Crypto Beach

2477
01:16:45,440 --> 01:16:46,160
Swardong

2478
01:16:46,160 --> 01:16:48,240
My cousin Richie

2479
01:16:49,040 --> 01:16:49,840
Ujavu

2480
01:16:50,640 --> 01:16:51,520
Oh wait

2481
01:16:51,520 --> 01:16:52,640
How was that Indian prison

2482
01:16:52,640 --> 01:16:53,920
Did you ever find out he got his rupees

2483
01:16:53,920 --> 01:16:56,080
I'm sorry why is Ujavu Indian prison again

2484
01:16:56,080 --> 01:16:58,400
Oh what do you mean why is he an Indian prison

2485
01:16:58,400 --> 01:16:59,920
Do you really want to know the facts

2486
01:16:59,920 --> 01:17:00,640
Well yeah kind of

2487
01:17:00,640 --> 01:17:02,720
First of all he ran a call center

2488
01:17:02,720 --> 01:17:04,320
And the call center did very well

2489
01:17:04,320 --> 01:17:04,960
Right

2490
01:17:04,960 --> 01:17:09,760
The problem was that Ujavu had a penchant for white ladies

2491
01:17:10,560 --> 01:17:14,000
So he started shipping them in from the United States

2492
01:17:14,000 --> 01:17:17,040
And then he got caught bringing them over state lines

2493
01:17:17,680 --> 01:17:20,640
So that you know I'm not kidding you at all man

2494
01:17:20,640 --> 01:17:22,080
And then he got busted with Coke

2495
01:17:22,080 --> 01:17:23,360
Because white broads like to do coke

2496
01:17:23,360 --> 01:17:24,240
Ujavu did this

2497
01:17:24,240 --> 01:17:24,560
Yes

2498
01:17:24,560 --> 01:17:24,960
No

2499
01:17:24,960 --> 01:17:25,520
Dude it was

2500
01:17:25,520 --> 01:17:27,840
What Larry you're a fucking asshole

2501
01:17:27,840 --> 01:17:29,760
Now you're talking to the first person to mine

2502
01:17:29,760 --> 01:17:30,560
I ain't even doing it

2503
01:17:30,560 --> 01:17:32,320
I knew I wouldn't you do that

2504
01:17:32,320 --> 01:17:34,480
Chroma got an armor to kick your ass now

2505
01:17:34,480 --> 01:17:36,080
You are the stupidest motherfucker Larry

2506
01:17:36,080 --> 01:17:37,440
You really are man

2507
01:17:37,440 --> 01:17:39,200
We don't want to be friends with Javu

2508
01:17:39,200 --> 01:17:40,960
You're so stupid it'd be by the gram

2509
01:17:40,960 --> 01:17:42,080
Dude I know that didn't happen

2510
01:17:42,080 --> 01:17:44,080
But Ujavu is a fucking man

2511
01:17:44,080 --> 01:17:45,600
I wasn't I know Ujavu

2512
01:17:45,600 --> 01:17:46,400
Go stop

2513
01:17:46,400 --> 01:17:47,600
Why is he really in jail whatever

2514
01:17:47,600 --> 01:17:50,080
Ujavu is where we do proud for Indian women

2515
01:17:51,040 --> 01:17:52,800
Man you guys suck

2516
01:17:52,800 --> 01:17:53,520
You really do

2517
01:17:53,520 --> 01:17:54,800
I hate this podcast

2518
01:17:54,800 --> 01:17:56,160
It was a great story

2519
01:17:56,160 --> 01:17:56,800
Whatever

2520
01:17:57,520 --> 01:17:59,200
Yeah you told a good story too

2521
01:17:59,200 --> 01:18:00,480
I can't get you back

2522
01:18:00,480 --> 01:18:02,640
But stupid fuck ass over there

2523
01:18:02,640 --> 01:18:03,360
Can't fucking

2524
01:18:07,120 --> 01:18:09,040
I'm a fucking I'm a bit killer

2525
01:18:09,040 --> 01:18:10,640
I mean you're a fucking fanook

2526
01:18:10,640 --> 01:18:12,560
You ask clown why would you do that

2527
01:18:13,120 --> 01:18:13,760
Exactly

2528
01:18:13,760 --> 01:18:15,120
You're like Stevie Wonder all the time

2529
01:18:15,120 --> 01:18:16,000
I'm gonna tell you why

2530
01:18:16,000 --> 01:18:18,080
Because I don't want you to be

2531
01:18:18,080 --> 01:18:19,840
Smurge Ujavu's name with them white women

2532
01:18:19,840 --> 01:18:21,360
It's a joke

2533
01:18:21,360 --> 01:18:22,720
It's total joke

2534
01:18:22,720 --> 01:18:25,360
Don't censor me on my own podcast

2535
01:18:26,240 --> 01:18:27,120
Okay

2536
01:18:27,120 --> 01:18:27,680
Thank you

2537
01:18:28,320 --> 01:18:29,840
You fucking asshole

2538
01:18:29,840 --> 01:18:30,720
Oh my god

2539
01:18:31,440 --> 01:18:32,400
Karlo man

2540
01:18:32,400 --> 01:18:33,120
Thanks for the guitar buddy

2541
01:18:33,120 --> 01:18:34,880
Thanks Karlo for the guitar brother

2542
01:18:36,480 --> 01:18:38,240
David out there in Starbucks

2543
01:18:38,240 --> 01:18:39,120
And Camille

2544
01:18:39,120 --> 01:18:40,320
Yeah keep listening bro

2545
01:18:40,320 --> 01:18:40,800
Starbucks

2546
01:18:41,680 --> 01:18:42,880
Only fans girls

2547
01:18:42,880 --> 01:18:44,320
Yeah keep sending Larry Nudes

2548
01:18:44,960 --> 01:18:47,200
And Tom Sreak Clinic Automatic

2549
01:18:47,200 --> 01:18:48,720
Automatic

2550
01:18:50,080 --> 01:18:52,320
Tom Sreak Clinic Automotive

2551
01:18:52,320 --> 01:18:54,000
And Veterinarian Service

2552
01:18:54,000 --> 01:18:55,760
He still has to read the paper

2553
01:18:55,760 --> 01:18:56,960
You're one stop shop

2554
01:18:57,520 --> 01:18:59,520
Where was Tom's Veterinarian Wall Shop

2555
01:18:59,520 --> 01:19:00,880
Wait a second we're gonna do that

2556
01:19:00,880 --> 01:19:02,400
Give me a time for the jingle

2557
01:19:02,400 --> 01:19:04,320
Wait a second he sent me a jingle

2558
01:19:04,320 --> 01:19:05,520
So I have to read it okay

2559
01:19:05,520 --> 01:19:06,000
So read it

2560
01:19:06,000 --> 01:19:07,520
Okay I don't know I don't know about Tom

2561
01:19:07,520 --> 01:19:10,320
It's a little side veterinary mechanic

2562
01:19:14,160 --> 01:19:15,680
Are you kidding me this is a real place

2563
01:19:16,800 --> 01:19:19,360
Wait here's the jingle they sent us relaxed

2564
01:19:20,560 --> 01:19:22,320
When your muffin has been stuffed

2565
01:19:22,320 --> 01:19:23,600
Then it's starting to crust

2566
01:19:24,240 --> 01:19:26,160
Call Tom Sreak Clinic

2567
01:19:27,120 --> 01:19:28,720
Tom's you're one stop shop

2568
01:19:28,720 --> 01:19:30,400
Yeah it's a free clinic

2569
01:19:30,400 --> 01:19:32,960
Veterinary Veterinarian Service

2570
01:19:32,960 --> 01:19:34,880
And automotive service

2571
01:19:34,880 --> 01:19:36,720
Right like you're just a robot guy

2572
01:19:36,720 --> 01:19:38,880
You can bring it in here and he can wash my dog

2573
01:19:38,880 --> 01:19:39,920
While I leave the car

2574
01:19:39,920 --> 01:19:41,840
Oh you're not washing dogs

2575
01:19:41,840 --> 01:19:43,920
Yeah no I'm not washing dogs

2576
01:19:43,920 --> 01:19:45,360
This is a reputable business

2577
01:19:45,360 --> 01:19:47,200
No it's not a kennel

2578
01:19:47,200 --> 01:19:49,200
It's like the Veterinary Service

2579
01:19:49,200 --> 01:19:49,920
Oh I see

2580
01:19:49,920 --> 01:19:51,680
Yeah you got your dogs got kennel cough

2581
01:19:51,680 --> 01:19:52,560
Bring that bitch over

2582
01:19:52,560 --> 01:19:52,720
Right

2583
01:19:52,720 --> 01:19:54,160
We'll change your oil on your head

2584
01:19:54,160 --> 01:19:54,480
Do my brakes

2585
01:19:54,480 --> 01:19:55,920
Give my dog the warm-up

2586
01:19:55,920 --> 01:19:56,960
I can fucking

2587
01:19:56,960 --> 01:19:58,560
If these got parvole we'll put it down

2588
01:19:58,560 --> 01:20:00,400
First you get a fucking transmission

2589
01:20:00,400 --> 01:20:02,240
You got green liquid dip

2590
01:20:02,240 --> 01:20:03,280
Dripping from your dick

2591
01:20:04,000 --> 01:20:04,320
Right

2592
01:20:04,320 --> 01:20:05,920
You fucking need an oil change

2593
01:20:05,920 --> 01:20:07,120
Also at the same time

2594
01:20:07,120 --> 01:20:08,640
Maybe you can fucking line up

2595
01:20:08,640 --> 01:20:09,760
Put some appointments too

2596
01:20:09,760 --> 01:20:10,960
Take pet meds for that

2597
01:20:10,960 --> 01:20:12,240
Well you ever take pet meds?

2598
01:20:12,800 --> 01:20:13,280
I did

2599
01:20:13,280 --> 01:20:15,840
Yeah I used to know a girl that worked for a vet

2600
01:20:15,840 --> 01:20:17,200
And she would bring us pet meds

2601
01:20:17,200 --> 01:20:18,400
I did it once in a while

2602
01:20:18,400 --> 01:20:19,680
I did pet meds too

2603
01:20:19,680 --> 01:20:19,920
Yeah

2604
01:20:21,360 --> 01:20:22,160
Not fun

2605
01:20:22,160 --> 01:20:23,120
Everything turned purple

2606
01:20:23,120 --> 01:20:24,880
Yeah it was just about to see

2607
01:20:24,880 --> 01:20:25,520
It was purple

2608
01:20:25,520 --> 01:20:27,040
Man that's so funny

2609
01:20:29,040 --> 01:20:31,280
Overnosing on animal drugs

2610
01:20:31,280 --> 01:20:32,480
Here's a half with me

2611
01:20:32,480 --> 01:20:33,440
Oh boy

2612
01:20:33,440 --> 01:20:34,720
You kissed another dude

2613
01:20:34,720 --> 01:20:36,320
I had an eye infection

2614
01:20:36,320 --> 01:20:38,400
And I had this medicine

2615
01:20:38,400 --> 01:20:39,840
That I would give the kittens

2616
01:20:39,840 --> 01:20:40,480
That had eye infection

2617
01:20:40,480 --> 01:20:41,040
Wait a second

2618
01:20:41,040 --> 01:20:42,240
Did you drop it in their eyes?

2619
01:20:43,120 --> 01:20:43,520
Yeah

2620
01:20:43,520 --> 01:20:45,440
Oh you're fucking with crazy shit dude

2621
01:20:45,440 --> 01:20:47,040
It was like this greasy shit

2622
01:20:47,040 --> 01:20:47,760
But you can't

2623
01:20:47,760 --> 01:20:49,120
You can see with your eyes

2624
01:20:49,120 --> 01:20:50,560
If it's in my stomach

2625
01:20:50,560 --> 01:20:51,360
I don't care about her

2626
01:20:51,360 --> 01:20:52,160
I snored it

2627
01:20:52,160 --> 01:20:54,000
You know you're dropping your eyes

2628
01:20:54,000 --> 01:20:54,320
Yeah

2629
01:20:54,320 --> 01:20:55,520
That's a little crazy

2630
01:20:55,520 --> 01:20:55,920
Listen

2631
01:20:56,720 --> 01:20:58,640
So I had this eye infection

2632
01:20:58,640 --> 01:21:00,560
And this girl Adele

2633
01:21:00,560 --> 01:21:01,360
She was over

2634
01:21:01,360 --> 01:21:03,520
And she's a nurse at fucking

2635
01:21:03,520 --> 01:21:05,360
Ross Hospital in Chicago

2636
01:21:05,360 --> 01:21:06,320
And she goes to me

2637
01:21:07,120 --> 01:21:08,560
Yeah yeah you know

2638
01:21:08,560 --> 01:21:10,960
The pet medicine is the fucking same shit

2639
01:21:10,960 --> 01:21:12,080
That they give humans

2640
01:21:12,080 --> 01:21:13,120
So I'm like no way

2641
01:21:13,760 --> 01:21:16,160
And I'm like I got some eye medicine right here

2642
01:21:16,160 --> 01:21:16,960
For the guys

2643
01:21:16,960 --> 01:21:18,240
Your eyes already swollen

2644
01:21:18,240 --> 01:21:18,560
Yeah

2645
01:21:19,120 --> 01:21:20,960
She's like oh the hell works just fine

2646
01:21:20,960 --> 01:21:22,320
Oh man she's a what

2647
01:21:22,320 --> 01:21:23,120
She's a nurse

2648
01:21:24,080 --> 01:21:24,880
At the vet

2649
01:21:24,880 --> 01:21:25,520
Or wait no

2650
01:21:25,520 --> 01:21:26,320
She's a doctor

2651
01:21:26,320 --> 01:21:27,120
At Russia

2652
01:21:27,120 --> 01:21:27,760
At Russia

2653
01:21:27,760 --> 01:21:28,560
She's a professor

2654
01:21:28,560 --> 01:21:29,280
At Russia

2655
01:21:29,280 --> 01:21:30,400
At Russia oh my god

2656
01:21:30,400 --> 01:21:31,920
That's a reputable place

2657
01:21:31,920 --> 01:21:33,280
But doctors are all shams

2658
01:21:33,280 --> 01:21:34,960
I don't like going to the doctor

2659
01:21:34,960 --> 01:21:36,240
Oh listen to this lady

2660
01:21:36,240 --> 01:21:37,600
They told you cat eye drops are good

2661
01:21:37,600 --> 01:21:39,680
I put it in in the uh

2662
01:21:39,680 --> 01:21:40,640
The infection

2663
01:21:41,200 --> 01:21:42,000
It really

2664
01:21:42,000 --> 01:21:42,560
You got it

2665
01:21:42,560 --> 01:21:43,360
Wait a second

2666
01:21:43,360 --> 01:21:45,040
Wait can you repeat that again

2667
01:21:45,040 --> 01:21:45,600
What happened

2668
01:21:45,600 --> 01:21:46,880
The infection

2669
01:21:46,880 --> 01:21:47,360
Oh you got

2670
01:21:47,360 --> 01:21:48,240
Wait no you should say

2671
01:21:48,240 --> 01:21:49,680
I got an infection

2672
01:21:49,680 --> 01:21:51,120
I already had the infection

2673
01:21:51,120 --> 01:21:52,240
They put it in the drops

2674
01:21:52,240 --> 01:21:54,400
Oh I was intensifying it

2675
01:21:54,400 --> 01:21:55,360
I apologize

2676
01:21:55,360 --> 01:21:57,120
The infection got worse

2677
01:21:57,120 --> 01:21:58,480
Oh you think

2678
01:21:58,480 --> 01:22:01,280
I mean you said cat eye drops for a human

2679
01:22:01,280 --> 01:22:02,640
So then when I finally did

2680
01:22:02,640 --> 01:22:03,840
When it got so bad

2681
01:22:03,840 --> 01:22:04,640
No I was gonna lose my eye

2682
01:22:04,640 --> 01:22:05,840
And you kept using them right

2683
01:22:07,040 --> 01:22:08,640
Cause I told you tarted you are

2684
01:22:08,640 --> 01:22:10,160
You're like oh it'll get better

2685
01:22:10,160 --> 01:22:11,440
If I keep using more

2686
01:22:11,440 --> 01:22:11,920
Right

2687
01:22:11,920 --> 01:22:12,400
Right

2688
01:22:13,040 --> 01:22:14,560
I mean you look like you have

2689
01:22:14,560 --> 01:22:15,760
Punched by Mike Tyson

2690
01:22:15,760 --> 01:22:16,720
You're just a sorry

2691
01:22:16,720 --> 01:22:18,400
Like you really look like

2692
01:22:18,400 --> 01:22:20,400
You're just a fat Chinese guy

2693
01:22:20,400 --> 01:22:22,480
And you can barely get the drops in

2694
01:22:22,480 --> 01:22:23,280
Totally

2695
01:22:23,920 --> 01:22:25,280
Just swollen me

2696
01:22:25,280 --> 01:22:26,320
Just the left side though

2697
01:22:26,320 --> 01:22:26,960
Just swollen

2698
01:22:26,960 --> 01:22:28,160
So finally Mary's like

2699
01:22:28,160 --> 01:22:29,760
You better go to the fucking doctor

2700
01:22:29,760 --> 01:22:31,280
You're gonna lose your vision and shit

2701
01:22:31,280 --> 01:22:32,720
Yeah you think

2702
01:22:32,720 --> 01:22:34,720
I mean you have an infection in your eye

2703
01:22:34,720 --> 01:22:37,680
And I told them I was putting this cat medicine

2704
01:22:38,320 --> 01:22:39,360
Oh my god

2705
01:22:40,560 --> 01:22:42,400
That was probably the lowest point in your life

2706
01:22:42,400 --> 01:22:44,080
Who the fuck told you that

2707
01:22:44,080 --> 01:22:46,880
Oh a nurse for a bra

2708
01:22:46,880 --> 01:22:48,240
And then I do heroin with

2709
01:22:50,320 --> 01:22:51,840
No she didn't party

2710
01:22:51,840 --> 01:22:53,040
No that's even worse

2711
01:22:53,040 --> 01:22:54,560
She was one of my straighter friends

2712
01:22:54,560 --> 01:22:55,840
You're sports head even mean

2713
01:22:55,840 --> 01:22:56,560
She was straight

2714
01:22:56,560 --> 01:22:58,320
She was a little cracker

2715
01:22:58,320 --> 01:22:59,120
No man

2716
01:22:59,120 --> 01:23:01,280
And she's one of my friend's wife

2717
01:23:01,280 --> 01:23:02,960
So it's very straight and clean

2718
01:23:02,960 --> 01:23:05,280
Yeah it sounds like it's giving horrible advice

2719
01:23:05,280 --> 01:23:08,000
Which I'd rather have a nurse on heroin

2720
01:23:08,000 --> 01:23:09,680
Tell me that cat eye drops are good

2721
01:23:09,680 --> 01:23:11,440
Mike no better than to give you cat medicine

2722
01:23:11,440 --> 01:23:12,320
Yeah like here you go

2723
01:23:12,320 --> 01:23:13,360
Yeah here you go Larry

2724
01:23:13,360 --> 01:23:15,040
Put these cat drops in your eye

2725
01:23:15,600 --> 01:23:17,520
It was just puffy and swollen

2726
01:23:17,520 --> 01:23:18,400
You think

2727
01:23:18,400 --> 01:23:19,360
I mean dude

2728
01:23:19,360 --> 01:23:21,680
Did you really have to tell me what it was like

2729
01:23:21,680 --> 01:23:24,000
He's like oh my god you're using this

2730
01:23:24,000 --> 01:23:25,120
I brought it in with me

2731
01:23:25,120 --> 01:23:25,920
Wow

2732
01:23:25,920 --> 01:23:27,840
You brought it with you

2733
01:23:27,840 --> 01:23:30,080
Like a real retard

2734
01:23:30,080 --> 01:23:32,480
Like this is what I've been using doc

2735
01:23:32,480 --> 01:23:33,840
Like what the fuck is wrong with you

2736
01:23:33,840 --> 01:23:34,640
This is a cat

2737
01:23:34,640 --> 01:23:35,840
Well I said my friend was a nurse

2738
01:23:35,840 --> 01:23:38,000
And Ross told me that this shit was okay

2739
01:23:38,000 --> 01:23:40,000
Yeah my friend works as a guitarist

2740
01:23:40,000 --> 01:23:41,200
This is for animals

2741
01:23:41,200 --> 01:23:41,680
Yeah

2742
01:23:41,680 --> 01:23:42,480
Yeah

2743
01:23:42,480 --> 01:23:45,040
And you're an animal you idiot

2744
01:23:45,920 --> 01:23:48,800
It says on there you've been giving it to your cat

2745
01:23:48,800 --> 01:23:49,280
Oh man

2746
01:23:49,280 --> 01:23:51,200
You knew it was for animals

2747
01:23:51,200 --> 01:23:52,400
The doctor just had to say it out loud

2748
01:23:52,400 --> 01:23:55,200
But my friend told me that it was cool man

2749
01:23:55,200 --> 01:23:57,120
And she was a nurse and I trusted her

2750
01:23:57,120 --> 01:23:59,440
And I guess you know sometimes you just gotta

2751
01:24:00,240 --> 01:24:04,080
Trust people to tell you to put animal medicine in your eye

2752
01:24:04,080 --> 01:24:05,280
Absolutely not

2753
01:24:06,320 --> 01:24:08,880
I mean that is the stupidest thing I've heard tonight

2754
01:24:08,880 --> 01:24:10,720
Thank you Larry for sharing with us

2755
01:24:10,720 --> 01:24:11,600
I really appreciate it

2756
01:24:11,600 --> 01:24:13,040
Oh my god

2757
01:24:13,040 --> 01:24:15,200
The idiocy in that statement

2758
01:24:15,200 --> 01:24:16,800
And the best is you bring it with you

2759
01:24:16,800 --> 01:24:19,040
You could at least be like a spider bit me

2760
01:24:19,040 --> 01:24:20,880
Or something out in my eye

2761
01:24:20,880 --> 01:24:21,520
You know what I mean

2762
01:24:21,520 --> 01:24:22,160
But you just kept

2763
01:24:22,160 --> 01:24:23,360
You just kept

2764
01:24:23,360 --> 01:24:24,720
You just kept the cat medicine

2765
01:24:24,720 --> 01:24:27,040
I wanted the doc to know what the fuck had

2766
01:24:27,040 --> 01:24:27,840
Happened

2767
01:24:27,840 --> 01:24:29,040
He could tell right away

2768
01:24:29,040 --> 01:24:29,840
Good for it

2769
01:24:29,840 --> 01:24:32,000
He wasn't like hidden

2770
01:24:32,000 --> 01:24:33,360
Your whole eye is swollen

2771
01:24:33,360 --> 01:24:34,560
Well he might have been like

2772
01:24:34,560 --> 01:24:35,760
Shit I don't know what's wrong

2773
01:24:35,760 --> 01:24:37,920
I wanted to let him know I was using

2774
01:24:37,920 --> 01:24:38,800
Pet Meds

2775
01:24:38,800 --> 01:24:39,280
Yeah

2776
01:24:39,280 --> 01:24:40,000
I mean because that's

2777
01:24:40,000 --> 01:24:41,120
You're paying for this time

2778
01:24:41,120 --> 01:24:43,040
You might have stayed on him for a while

2779
01:24:43,040 --> 01:24:43,840
You never know

2780
01:24:43,840 --> 01:24:44,640
The Pet Meds

2781
01:24:44,640 --> 01:24:45,040
Yeah

2782
01:24:46,800 --> 01:24:47,840
No it was obviously

2783
01:24:47,840 --> 01:24:49,840
Now you're stuck on killing his eyes

2784
01:24:49,840 --> 01:24:51,040
That's probably the whole thing

2785
01:24:51,040 --> 01:24:52,880
I didn't stay on him long enough

2786
01:24:52,880 --> 01:24:54,400
Yeah that's the whole thing

2787
01:24:54,400 --> 01:24:57,840
I only tried heroin 175 times

2788
01:24:57,840 --> 01:24:59,440
I'm not sure if I like it yet

2789
01:24:59,440 --> 01:25:01,600
Yeah no I'll tell you about the 176

2790
01:25:02,960 --> 01:25:04,400
Speaking of 76

2791
01:25:05,120 --> 01:25:06,080
I think that's what

2792
01:25:06,080 --> 01:25:07,040
I think

2793
01:25:07,040 --> 01:25:09,520
I think this is our 77th episode

2794
01:25:10,240 --> 01:25:11,040
Shout out

2795
01:25:11,040 --> 01:25:11,760
Yeah

2796
01:25:11,760 --> 01:25:12,960
Man we're still together

2797
01:25:12,960 --> 01:25:14,880
This is the greatest episode ever

2798
01:25:14,880 --> 01:25:15,600
I mean listen

2799
01:25:15,600 --> 01:25:16,400
Yeah that's a pretty good

2800
01:25:16,400 --> 01:25:17,360
This really is a good one

2801
01:25:17,360 --> 01:25:20,000
My band spirit at 77 is playing at

2802
01:25:21,280 --> 01:25:23,760
The Chicago Loop in Stream with Illinois

2803
01:25:23,760 --> 01:25:25,520
On February 10th

2804
01:25:25,520 --> 01:25:27,360
And it's gonna be fucking dope

2805
01:25:27,360 --> 01:25:28,880
We play punk rock covers

2806
01:25:29,520 --> 01:25:31,200
So if you're in Stream with Illinois

2807
01:25:31,200 --> 01:25:32,320
On February 10th

2808
01:25:32,320 --> 01:25:33,840
And you're hearing this fucking thing

2809
01:25:34,400 --> 01:25:35,040
Come on out

2810
01:25:35,040 --> 01:25:36,880
And if you're not fucking we hope you die

2811
01:25:37,440 --> 01:25:38,800
And if you are there man

2812
01:25:38,800 --> 01:25:39,600
We will party

2813
01:25:39,600 --> 01:25:40,080
I'll bring

2814
01:25:40,880 --> 01:25:42,720
I'll bring some fucking goodies

2815
01:25:42,720 --> 01:25:43,200
So

2816
01:25:43,200 --> 01:25:45,120
Yeah his sweet sweet honey bun ass

2817
01:25:45,120 --> 01:25:46,320
I'll bring my sweet ass

2818
01:25:46,320 --> 01:25:46,880
Exactly

2819
01:25:47,440 --> 01:25:48,960
He's got honey buns

2820
01:25:49,840 --> 01:25:51,120
And he's here to have fun

2821
01:25:52,240 --> 01:25:53,600
Put it in his mouth

2822
01:25:53,600 --> 01:25:55,200
You gotta give me honey buns

2823
01:25:55,200 --> 01:25:56,160
Man that's alright though

2824
01:25:56,800 --> 01:25:57,360
No k

2825
01:25:57,360 --> 01:25:58,640
We're all good with time is it

2826
01:25:58,640 --> 01:25:59,200
It's time to

2827
01:25:59,200 --> 01:26:01,280
Okay so tell me why is your job on gel

2828
01:26:01,280 --> 01:26:02,720
Oh no we're not telling you at all

2829
01:26:02,720 --> 01:26:04,240
Thank you for tuning in

2830
01:26:04,240 --> 01:26:05,520
And we have to find out in the next episode

2831
01:26:05,520 --> 01:26:06,400
We appreciate it

2832
01:26:06,400 --> 01:26:07,040
Don't tell me why

2833
01:26:07,040 --> 01:26:07,920
No we're not telling you

2834
01:26:07,920 --> 01:26:08,640
Joe why is your job on gel

2835
01:26:08,640 --> 01:26:11,840
Valeria Needless Show wants to thank you

2836
01:26:11,840 --> 01:26:12,480
We love you

2837
01:26:12,480 --> 01:26:14,400
Like, follow, subscribe, check out our Twitter

2838
01:26:14,400 --> 01:26:14,800
Check out

2839
01:26:14,800 --> 01:26:24,800
Peace