Hey guys, I'm so excited to be here today with
Dr. Jacqueline Campbell, and we're going to be
talking about the overlooked shift in emotional
intelligence and what leaders need to know about
it. This is huge. Guys, she looks like she's
in her teenage years still, but this lady has
an old soul, and she's served our great country
as well. We thank you for your service, Dr. Jacqueline,
and I love the service you continue to do as
you help people with emotional intelligence.
This is something that visionaries need most
of all. Yeah, I would agree. I think that a lot
of visionaries are highly sensitive people because
your vision means you're just so aware. So usually
our energy is spread so many different places.
So it's hard to complete your vision and keep
it on track without losing yourself in it because
it can be very heavy. Yeah, absolutely. Tell
us about your career. I summarized it way too
fast a little bit. I also had some fun with your
age there. But I would love the audience to have
the type of understanding that I do. Because
due to our age and our social statuses, people
could take my comments in a different direction.
And I want people to realize that, no, no, no.
You have some serious depth with what you've
done, what you've figured out, and how you've
come to appreciate emotional intelligence and
the way that you bring it to others. And you're
a doctor, too. Tell us about that. What type
of doctor are you? All things Dr. Jacqueline.
Perfect. Well, what got me into doing this work
was my childhood. I didn't really have the most
stable childhood. we really weren't safe we didn't
know when we would be safe because you know generational
trauma is passed down to you know our grandparents
and then our parents and then us and you know
we all do our best every generation trying to
make it better but at the end of the day when
i was 17 i was like i got to be done with this
i need a different life something that's better
but i didn't know what that would be so i went
to the marine corps and i spent six years overseas
and i worked in security which it was an amazing
experience and i got a lot of exposure culturally
and it was very educational for me but also i
wasn't talking and so i would be very rough and
aggressive and sometimes even violent but as
a woman i really wanted to be you know, nurturing,
especially when I started having children. So
after I got out of the military and I wasn't
working in security anymore, I was thinking,
well, what do I want to do for myself? What do
I want to study? When I was actually a shoo -in
to the FBI, I'm sorry, the DEA, when I started
realizing, no, I need, I need help. Right. So
I started taking psychology courses and I ended
up extending because I was going into criminology.
It was very interesting why we are the way we
are, especially when we have all this dysfunction.
You know, like what makes bad people bad? Like,
that's really what I wanted to understand, because
I also had a lot of those tendencies to be so
rough. So I really wanted to understand. Through
understanding that, I realized I just needed
therapy. I actually extended after my master's
and I got, you know, the degree to be able to
be a licensed therapist, specialized in neuroscience,
working with trauma survivors, a lot of military
people who are serving other people, teachers,
nurses. And towards the end of that, because
I was also a business owner. So, you know, business
owners gravitate to other people who get them.
They wanted to be working with me, even though
they were in therapy. And they were actually
the ones that told me that this was needed in
this space with leaders, with executives, that
something like working on their deep emotions
and learning to ground themselves is not incorporated
in leadership development. So that was the whole
reason why I made this shift, which is actually
very scary because I had no money. It was the
tail end of a failed business attempt. And I'm
like, I'm really not good at business. So I guess
I can try again. They're saying that it's needed.
So I jumped ship. I left the six figure therapy
practice after I had bounced back from that business
attempt to be able to do this. So now fast forward
two years later, we're starting to launch the
trainings. Whoa. There is so much about what
you talked about that I want to ask questions
about my brain. I don't know if it's going to
keep up, but there's so much value in that path
for visionaries. I don't think you're the only
visionary who's had more than one attempt at
trying to figure out which direction to go. I
think 99 .9 % of us have, you know, there's Tiger
Woods. I think he knew where he was going as
a little kid. You know, he was always golfing.
Let's dive into one of these big subjects real
quick. I'm going to pull us back full circle
after the break point, but I want to make sure
that we tie some of this vast depth that you
have to some of the tangible things that companies
and businesses and visionaries can be doing in
the here and now. So the shift in emotional intelligence,
one of the shifts that I recognize, and I believe
I would say pulled it from our combined AI, and
so it might be your concept, was about the idea
of emotional safety and why that's important
with companies and with people. And more importantly,
how do we facilitate that? Because it's like,
obviously, we all want to be safe. How do we
move that towards a tangible conversation? But
is there another shift that you also want to
add to that? Well, that's actually a really good
point because people don't think, well, what
do you mean emotional safety? We don't know how
to measure it. or how to make sure that you are
emotionally safe. Because a lot of time we assume
we are when we're probably not. When it comes
to the way our nervous system is, it projects
whatever's inside. So if you are hard on yourself,
you are naturally going to be hard on the people
around you. If you are critical to yourself,
you're going to be critical to them. If you put
pressure on yourself, you're going to put pressure
on them. So you have these individuals who are
promoted into leadership space or roles. And
in these spaces, they're causing a lot of the
problems that they don't like. Pause that thought.
I want you to keep going. But I want to translate
that. I have a very special reason for doing
this, my friends. We got a lot of Spanish speakers
that come in and listen to this. And so I want
to get I wanted to hit that home because the
the tendency. for most of the people that i know
in central south america they're very hard on
themselves um and so it does kind of end up projecting
on others as well and all of us need help with
regulating that so continue please you're well
you're absolutely right and and i appreciate
you making that translation because you see it
in all different cultures in different ways but
i do find that the changing the the transforming
the transformation to giving yourself a little
bit more grace is harder for minorities whether
it be because those those individuals are harder
on themselves because society's harder on them
so then you have a double negative so to tell
them if they which is so hard for them to understand
if you are easier on yourself if you give yourself
some grace you'll actually be able to do more
It just doesn't register. This is a tough reality
for entrepreneurs. So anybody who's an entrepreneur
and high achiever, right? You're alpha, you're
driven, you got to make things happen. Tenacity
is a big part of winning the game, et cetera.
So how do we balance that as people who want
to be driven, disciplined, diligent? How do we
know if we're crossing the lines of obsessive?
over -functioning, and ultimately causing problems
for ourselves and others by diving in too deep?
Well, if you're not very aware, somebody's probably
going to be telling you instead of you realizing
it, right? So just listen. At least try to take
the feedback. But then if you are more aware,
and I feel like visionaries, because they are
more sensitive, they are self -aware, even though
it's hard to get out. It's like we're fighting
ourselves. Even though we know we're fighting
ourselves, you know, in that space, if it is
causing you stress, something is out of alignment
or you're putting too much pressure on yourself.
Right. I'm sure there's other factors, but those
are two main ones where if you can just say,
OK, now that the stress is building, I just need
a break. For example, I think it was Monday.
I had a few things on my schedule that I just
couldn't keep up. And so I can actually accomplish
a whole lot more if I'm effective, if my brain
is working. And I know this. So because I was
starting to get overwhelmed, I took something
off my schedule and I put it for the next day.
And then it happened the next day. That day it
calmed everything down because I'm like, okay,
I took the pressure off and I'll get it done
the next day. I was having tech issues, which
is interesting, right? And instead of pressuring
myself to just get everything done, you can't
do anything about that. You can just do what
you can do. So the next day, the same thing happened.
And I'm like, okay, well, I got the thing done
that I was supposed to yesterday and I got a
couple other things done. So now something else
has to be pushed off. And all I'm doing is strategically
prioritizing so that I can still stay sane. Everything's
still getting done. And that's when I have to
remind myself there's a specific phrase that
helps me bounce back because I'm like, everything
will get done. I may not know how. Everything
will get done, but I am more effective if I'm
not stressed. So I have to take care of me. I
think it's so important, visionaries. We often
focus on the tactical of what we need to do that
seems so related to the mission, but oftentimes
it's what's not related to the mission that is
required. And so I left my apartment the other
day and I was running and I was running late
and I had like a Gatorade type electrolyte drink
with me and I start drinking it as I'm running
and I began to think of marathon. I was like,
man, this is hard. I was like, I wonder how they
train to do this. That you know it. And what
I realize, I'm correlating that with what you're
talking about, because we would think that, okay,
to win the marathon, you got to run your 26 miles.
Like you got to get that done. But if you didn't
drink the water along the way, then you wouldn't
be able to do it. You know, you wouldn't probably
make it. I imagine that they have disciplines
like that within themselves. And so if we're
in traffic, it's one of my favorite examples.
long time in south america but when i would i
learned eventually to stop being like everybody
else in the traffic jams it's all frustrated
man i'm like wait a second i've got my phone
right here i can put a podcast on i can call
a friend i can use this like this time is mine
no matter where i'm at to use how i want and
just that mental shift that also put me in a
better position to where when i'm coming to work
i am not as stressed when i'm you know on my
like client or a prospect that I'm trying to
help see the value of working with us. I'm not
coming in going like, Oh, I freaking hate traffic.
Oh, you know, and complaining about that and
distracting from the reality. So these emotional
regulations, while they're, I don't want to say
superfluous, but they're around what it is that
we do. They're ultimately the essence that create
the environment for us to be successful. And
as Taylor Welch says, a strong person, a weak
environment. will lose to a weak person who's
in a strong environment. Think of a strong person
with cinder blocks on their feet running a race
compared to somebody that doesn't even have legs.
You know, like that person's probably going to
win because the person is in an environment where
it's holding them back. So further thoughts on
that, Dr. Jacqueline? Well, I think our environment
definitely affects us. But in terms of adjusting
it to help it make you better, right? We can
do that. But it also, we have mirror neurons
in our eyes, our brain, and we can absorb what's
external to us. And because we are projecting
everything that's inside us externally, and then
we are ingesting, it's this cyclical dance. And
you are inevitably a co -creator of your own
reality because there are other factors that
are programming you. So you have to be conscious
of who and what you're around. So just making
sure that it's done intentionally. But then as
in the professional world, when you're talking
about somebody who's stressed, let's say it's
the leader. It's the same thing when you're in
a family environment, the head is going to kind
of be the sun, right? Everything and everyone
revolves around them because they're the one
with the control. It's the responsibility, but
that means everybody is dependent on them. So
if they're stressed, It's going to radiate to
everybody else. But if they're calm and sturdy,
even when things get hard, recognizing that they
have emotions, they need to take a step back.
What they're doing is they're showing through
modeled behavior how to manage this. You know,
so it's naturally going to be absorbed by the
people that they're leading. So guilty. So guilty.
I had to look the hard way too. And I still have
I'm stubborn. I still have to learn the hard
way. But I love what I love how you led by examples.
I came in today. You and Penny Wilson, both.
I hope you'll catch up. You're both phenomenal
leaders. And I don't want to just say therapists,
but people who help others with emotional regulation
and centeredness. I went right into my podcast
with her the other day and same thing. I was
kind of overstimulated. And she was like, so
I told that and she immediately said. Would you
like to do some breath work? And I was like,
let's do it. Let's just dive in. And I came in
today and same thing. You made space for me.
Right. We're supposed to go live at 10 o 'clock.
Some people are super demanding on that. You
came in super balanced, ready and willing to
focus on my needs first. Make sure I was good.
And then, of course, you had your questions too.
And that type of leadership is something that
I think a lot of startups could very much learn
from. And we have a lot of people who are very,
very focused on going into strategy and execution
and just getting things done. And there's these
shifts that can really, really help with the
next level of growth. So when we come back, we're
gonna take a little break. When we come back,
we're gonna talk about how leaders can build
trust, alignment, and strengthen their teams.
And I want to dive into some of the ways that
those leaders can apply it, perhaps on a daily,
weekly or monthly basis. We'll see what Dr. Jacqueline
brings to the table. All right. Welcome in to
Vision Pros Live with Jackson Callum. I'm your
show host. We'll be doing interviews for visionary
entrepreneurs and guest leaders who are building
fantastic visions out there. Hey, what's up,
my friends? Welcome in to Vision Pros Live. I'm
your show host, Jackson Callum, founder and CEO
of First Class Business. And I am in like constant
overstimulation mode lately. And I think it has
a lot to do with the really cool projects that
we're doing with AI. And as I say that, I'm super
glad that our lineup of guests lately has been
a lot of leadership development, emotional support
individuals. legends like Dr. Jacqueline Campbell,
who's here today to help us with the overlooked
shifts in emotional intelligence that leaders
really need to know. And I'm telling you, my
friends, if you want to create a great company,
one, you got to have a clear vision. In order
to have a clear vision, you got to have a clear
head, mind, and heart. In addition to that, you
also have to have a great culture. And if you
have a great culture, guess what? People want
to belong to it. That's what attracts people
to say, I want to work with you. Not our product
and our service. It's what we're building. And
then that attracts people to come in. You've
got to be able to position leaders well. They
want infrastructure. They want to know that they're
going to be safe here. They want to know that
they're going to be abundant and they're going
to win. So those three elements, in order to
get those aspects right, we've got to have people
like Dr. Campbell by our side. As I get ready
to bring her back on stage and we dive into some
of the emotional intelligence sequence. can apply,
right? What you're doing and what you're doing
with your teams. We first want to give you some
more resources. First is AI Mavericks. I actually
invest as a member of AI Mavericks. It's like
60 bucks a month right now. I don't know if their
price is going up or not, but I joined as quickly
as I could because I've known Austin Armstrong
for a little less than a year now. Met him at
Social Media Marketing World. And even though
he's got a million followers, this dude was so
present. He was so... genuinely ready and available
to talk to anybody who was there. His Facebook
is amazing to follow. I just, he's like my only
Facebook feed at this point, just his stuff popping
up. And it's because I learned so much from it.
There's so much value that comes out of it. And
I'm trying to make sure that I'm tied into him
and Scott Simpson, who's this partner on this
venture, because both of them are researching
AI at a super advanced level. And they're going
into things like the agentic, sorry, the agents,
agentic state as a whole. different topic, but
the agents that can actually do the work for
us. And so if you're looking for advanced AI
marketing and how to use AI, definitely check
out what they're up to and why we're using that.
I also have my own AI community. You would think
that we wouldn't do that, but I believe in collaboration,
not competition where you're trying to just crush
others. Kobe Bryant, Michael Jordan, we're great
friends. We got to make the same thing happen
if we want to create a new world. The AI marketplace
is what we've launched at First Class Business.
You go to ai .firstclassbusiness .io. This is
so important for the world. My friends, you already
are AI experts. We've all been using AI for decades.
And I think so many of you... have friends and
family who are professionals who are terrified
of what's going on with AI and they're worried
about, are they going to have a job in a year
from now? And yes, if you get ahead of this AI
curve and make sure that you position yourself
to just understand the language a little bit,
you don't have to be a tech. That's the best
part. You're going to do better with AI as a
normal human being than a tech geek would, because
if you understand emotional intelligence and
human relationships, you're going to be at the
front run or you're going to be the front runner
to help companies be able to create the next
level. of evolution that's going to take AI probably
five to 15 years to figure out anyway. resume
and even pass your interviews so that if you
do need to just transition transition to another
job because your current company doesn't believe
in your ai skills well we want to empower you
to do that and on the business side it shows
you your bottlenecks and i'm talking about real
bottlenecks at first when i designed this ai
tried to tell me um one of the questions was
is your uh do you do you want to automate your
prospect process or something like i was like
you can't automate prospecting. That's automating
your relationships. It's impossible. And so I
pushed back on it and I was like, look, maybe
you can do that, but right now, what are the
practical things that we're doing? Well, here's
one. Um, I don't have time. I care about my quality
assurance with my, with my clients, but I don't
have time to test it every day. And I was like,
Oh. Oh yeah, that's a huge thing. That could
absolutely be done with AI. And so of course
we then help people build these systems out through
the process. And so I want to get back to Dr.
Campbell, but I'm just so excited about what
this has been doing for us lately. It's helped
us increase our YouTube subscribers by over a
thousand subscribers in the last five days. We
were at 100 subscribers, my friends, like it
is so cool. It can be done. We launched 24 blog
posts in the last three days, all incredible.
deep blog posts that have been stuck in my brain
for the last 15 years that I couldn't do the
research for by myself. So I just can't, I can't
talk about this enough because you guys, we've
got to dive in and use these tools in order to
create abundance for ourselves. The world has
not been abundant in business for more than 50
years. 66 % of businesses fell within 10 years.
We got to stop that. Then there's the water project
is super near and dear to my heart at this point
because I didn't get it when I first saw it.
Somebody was telling me about it. I've never
been thirsty in my life, I don't think. And so
that's probably why. But I see these kids celebrating
water like my kids celebrate Christmas Day. And
that should help us realize like, whoa, there's
a big need here. What if our kids had to leave
school to get water or we had to leave work to
go find an unknown water source for our family?
We don't have to do that. But there's millions
of people in Africa who do. The neat thing about
the water project, when you decide to give 10
to 20 bucks to it, they actually will tell you.
what happened with the project, what the timeline
is, how it's coming to fruition and show you
that they actually did the work. And I love that
level of transparency. My friends, there's 8
billion people in this world to help. So if you
know of another cause that you'd like to see
us talk about, do me a huge favor, drop it in
the comments. I will personally take a look at
any cause that comes through this process and
see what we can do to help out with that cause
as well. I really hope you join us on that as
we go back to helping each one of your visions.
So without further ado, Dr. Jacqueline, again,
thanks for being here today. Sure. I appreciate
you coming back and I really love what you're
doing. I love the cause. Which one? Right. You,
you have so much, but I feel like the way that
you're doing it, you're, you're trying to help
everybody, right? Like it seems like you don't
always do the same cause, right? You're trying
to spread it. Well, here's my secret. And this
is our, this is our mantra at first class business.
It's our number one rule. And the number one
rule is we do what's best for those that we serve.
And everybody who comes in front of us is the
next person that we serve. And so we're always
going to do what's best. And that helps us move
into these and to back to that emotional intelligence
aspect, this topic that's so important to me.
It's like, that's why I'm always finding leaders
like you too, because I want to continue to help
the world realize that this is something that
can have an incredible positive impact on the
world and it can change it for the better. We
can win more as a society, as human beings, if
we just dive into it. So taking a moment to honor
that reality, let's dive into the, What can be
done weekly, monthly, or daily in relation to
how leaders can build trust, alignment, and stronger
teams? Well, let's do one first because there's
so much to unpack. You're talking about build
trust, alignment within their teams, right? And
stronger teams. Yeah. I mean, I think that that
ultimately leads to, right, is if you can build
trust and you can build alignment, it's going
to be strengthened. But how do we do that? It
does. And you're keep in mind, you're leading
at home and you're leading at work. Right. So
one is going to be a reflection of the other.
I wrote a book called Life's Contradictions.
It's actually right over my shoulder. In this
book, I discuss how leaders have personal issues
that are reflecting their professional issues.
And as they balance their nervous system, both
of them come into alignment. Now, we can't find
alignment with our teams or anybody else if we
don't have alignment with ourselves because we
get so disorganized and we don't have clarity
and we kind of tend to think that we have to
have it all together. So we end up doing something,
making a decision, giving an answer when I don't
even have clarity because we're scared of using
the words, I don't know. Give me a minute, right?
Or either give me a minute, give me 24 hours.
Let's say, for example, you're and this is something
that they can do on a daily basis. I ground before
I go into a meeting or meet with somebody. If
it's just for a quick second, that's fine at
the very least for the quick second. But usually
for about five minutes for this podcast, I did
a 15 minute breath work. Right. So we have to
prioritize what we're doing based off of who
and what we're going to interact with. So you
need to ground yourself. You have clarity. And
then moving forward. i don't ever make a an important
decision that's going to change the direct uh
the trajectory for my personal life or my professional
life if i i do it within um i'm sorry i don't
make the decision for 72 hours no matter how
happy i am about it or if i'm nervous about it
that is not entrepreneurial and it should be
it should be we get so impulsive just because
they're good hormones and good feelings doesn't
mean that they're good They can still blind you.
Oh my gosh, they will blind you. They will blind
us. And well, it also, as an entrepreneur, not
the solopreneurs, my friends, I don't believe
that's entrepreneurship. I love you and I hope
you continue to look for your teams because it
is a team sport. I've never met a successful
solopreneur. So with that said, it undermines
your teams, right? If I make a decision without
talking and I do it all the time, I mess this
up all the time. And I finally got somebody on
my team. who has a very strong voice and pushes
back on that. And I'm so happy that they do it.
I trust I get pissed in the moment, but I'm starting
to learn to dive more into that humility. And
I've got a little team, three people who are
on what we call the governing body. And there's
four of us in the governing body. I won't make
big decisions without consulting with those three
individuals first. And if we're in a position
where two of us want to do it and two of us don't
want to do it, we agree on who's going to be
the mediator. who comes in to help us be the
tiebreaker to decide and then we'll respect each
other on that and that protects me from one of
my favorite scariest quotes is absolute power
corrupts absolutely and every founder who's by
themselves is stuck in that position where you
are 100 likely to be corrupted you cannot leave
yourself in that position and make great decisions
as a business owner in my humble opinion. So
please continue. That was just sparked. And I
was like, yeah, I mess this up all the time.
And I'm sure other visionaries do too. Well,
I, I appreciate your vulnerability and saying
that because if we don't mess things up or if
we don't acknowledge that we've messed things
up because sometimes we don't want to, right.
Then we can't get the humility that comes with
it because that comes with wisdom and it's hard.
It's so hard to our ego. Because we're so scared
of losing that ego that we're like, no, we have
to be right. We have to hold it all together.
And I have to be the one in charge. And humility
says, yeah, you really, you're not the smartest
in the room. Sorry. I know you think you are,
but you're really not. So when it comes to that
saying, if you're the smartest person in the
room, you're in the wrong room. I don't agree.
I hate that saying. It makes me feel awful because
I'm usually the freaking smartest person in the
room on a specific topic. But like in every other
thing else, I'm lost. And so it's so frustrating
because you're like, like, no, I can't like dumb
down. But I know I don't relate to people because.
So thanks for calling it out. But what am I supposed
to fix that? You know, like, so, yeah, that's
really. Well, it helps us build humility, but
it also helps us see the value in other people.
So when we have stressed surface, let's say you're
dealing with a difficult co -worker that you
just want them to do something for you. are you
being too controlling are you not seeing their
value because they might just be in the wrong
position if they're not doing what you want them
to do or you might need to reframe and ask them
a different way which means you need to collaborate
better and individuals who are looking to be
in leadership for control they always micromanage
or they belittle That's not right. The best leaders,
the best people are the ones who say, no, I go
to different rooms to get different information.
And even on the thing that I'm an expert at,
the more you learn, the less you realize, you
know, because there's so much to learn. So you
have to be a lifelong learner and you naturally
have. You brought up two big things that I'm
going to showcase. And one is going to, I hope
it blows all y 'all's minds as you're listening
in our gravel nerds, humility. This word is one
of the most misunderstood words of our generations.
I got other podcasts where I literally talk in
depth, and I won't do that to you guys. But it
is so, one, it's about intentionality, my friends.
If we're not getting intentional with how we're
doing things, then, you know, whether it's our
tone, our cadence, or our word choice, right?
I can tell somebody I love you, and, like, they
won't get it because I didn't deliver it with
a sense of meaning. Or I can tell somebody, like,
I like you, and I can confuse them because, again,
there's nuance to all of these realities. The
word humility. is one of the most misunderstood
words of our generation. And I'm talking the
last thousand years, probably. And we're going
to go over here, Google. And Google recently
updated this. I'm glad they're getting closer.
But it says, humility is the quality of having
a modest view of one's value or importance. It
used to say a low view of oneself. That is the
exact opposite. Of the definition, the original
definition from over 2000 years ago in Judaism
and other such languages, probably Aramaic, I
can't remember which one from the study now,
but the original definition of humility as defined
by the sources of truth that were trying to help
us value these virtues was a full appreciation
for oneself and a full appreciation for everything
else. And so what does that mean? That means
that I can 100 % appreciate my own beauty. While
also appreciating everybody else's beauty. I
can appreciate my intelligence and realize what
I have while making sure to know that I'm not
better than anybody else just because I happen
to have gained that. And so when we shift our
understanding of what this word means, so many
people self -deprecate and think it's humility.
That's not humility. That's just a different
type of vice. So we're going to come back to
that too, Dr. Campbell. But I also want to show
this because you brought up the home. work and
they do intertwine and oftentimes we intertwine
them in ways that are super destructive when
it comes to our visions and I wrote this great
article in this the most expensive decision and
it's having the wrong people in the room look
if I'm at war and you know this is a Marine I
am NOT going to call my wife and say hey honey
should I had barged this door down You don't
talk to your wife about things like that when
you're at war like that. And when you come home,
you probably don't talk to things as a soldier.
But business owners do this all the time. And
so what happens when a business owner turns to
their spouse or a family for major business decisions?
Well, that's the wrong room entirely. According
to studies, family to business interference undermines
firm performance. A spouse without executive
experience. This is key. Your spouse can have
executive experience and they can crush it in
your business. I have nothing against it. I love
having a family involved if they have executive
experience in the business. But a spouse without
it in the business is filtering your decisions
through personal fear, not through strategy.
So many of us as business owners are guilty of
making a couple bad decisions. telling our spouses
too much about said bad decision, then putting
the onus on them for future decisions and saying,
well, what do I do, honey? You know, should I
do this or not? And how in the world are they
supposed to come up with the right answer if
they don't know how business actually works?
I think this is one of the most devastating things
that happens to visionaries and entrepreneurs.
Feel free to speak to either one, Dr. Jacqueline.
With what you were talking about in terms of
sharing with people not in the room, especially
making the decision, one thing which was really
unfortunate, and I wish this wasn't the case,
but it's a truth that I had to accept. I couldn't
take business advice because I'm a science person.
I know how to transform a human being, right?
So like the nervous system is my spot, right?
When it comes to business decision, I was getting
the wrong consultants, the wrong strategists,
the wrong coaches, because they were multimillionaires
with all these businesses. They must know more
than me. So I actually self -deprecated and I
got myself into hustle culture. That's not me.
I got like both feet. I'm a hippie. You know,
like I love meditating. I love doing things then.
And I knew that there's got to be a different
way than what they're telling me, but I didn't
trust myself. And that led to a business failure
as a single mom filing bankruptcy, losing everything.
And I still have to recover from all of that.
But that's because I took advice from somebody
I thought knew more because they had more money
and experience. Well, if they aren't aligned
with you. They're really not going to give you
the right advice. So now I discuss things, right?
And of course I discuss with Chet to get another,
you know, more experience. But after I talk to
only people who have lived my experience as a
visionary leader, sacrificing so much time, energy,
money, livelihood to get the vision, man, like
to create the vision. Those are the only people
who I will discuss about the hard decisions and
the struggle. Anybody else, they can't be part
of that conversation because they just don't
get it, which is okay. But I also don't talk
to people who have a lot of money who are in
hustle culture because they can't give me anything
worth of value. Even if they tell me how to scale
to, you know, multimillion, it's not worth it.
I am so grateful you're talking all about this
because those blog posts that have been driving
me crazy for years, almost all of them are synchronized
together to talk about how to not fall on perhaps
that we both felt and how to recognize the right
people and so i'm hoping to pave the path for
people so they can see it i want to go back to
something you said you talked about the failure
the bankruptcy and the difficulties i also have
my failures and there was a moment where i told
my sister during one of the most vulnerable points
in my life and i said you know what the good
news the great thing about being in this hole
right now that i can't get out of I can't screw
anything up. Yeah. I was stuck. There was nothing
I could freaking do. And so I learned a very
hard lesson as a leader and visionary that I
wasn't ready for the next level. And I learned
to be grateful to my God about it because I was
like, man, if I look back on myself 10 years
ago and I become a multimillionaire, I would
have ruined my life. I would have ruined my relationships
at an even higher level. I wasn't ready yet.
And I could not have seen it the way that I see
it now that I had that time to sit in that hole
and to know that, wow, this really freaking sucks.
And I got myself here. But as I try to figure
out how to dig out, I have nothing but time in
my hands to think about all the things I did
wrong to get myself in that situation and find
that sense of like, you know what? God knows
where I'm at. I can appreciate this. I can keep
moving. I think a lot of visionaries relate to
being in those types of situations. So you want
to speak more about that or do you want to move
to the next subject? Actually, while you were
saying that, what I was thinking of is now that
I had that moment to moment, it was like a whole
year that I spent alone. I'm like, I can't be
making any decisions right now. I really got.
a lot of gratitude for sitting in silence to
wait for the answer to surface and the universe
helps right god whatever you want to call it
source it is there and it's there to guide you
but it only is guiding you with your intuition
because that's what picks up on it when you're
still and so at the end of the day with all of
my lessons All the information that's out there
that's going to train me how to run a business
and all of these people who they have been through
this before, if they give me advice, I always
go back into silence and I wait for the answer
to be validated and verified of what I'm supposed
to do to move forward. But if leaders don't have
that discipline to hold themselves back from
a great idea, right? Or freak out because of
something that's scary to connect with themselves,
to find alignment. And then with discipline,
move forward because you can't run forward. That
just, you can't be still enough to hear the guidance
and to connect with the people around you to
make sure that they're still in alignment with
you, with all of us moving forward together.
If you start sprinting, it's just not going to
work. I do it all the time and it slows us down
all the time as a team. And so it's something,
the big topic of this week for our company is.
I've got to make sure that I include my team
more often when I'm creating these crazy ambitions.
And, you know, whether it's shiny object or even
it's something that's valuable, my friends, it
can be something that's super valuable. But if
you leave your team out or you leave the people
out who are supposed to be supporting it, then
it can disrupt the process and it can ruin the
whole experience. Just like if you go to a movie.
And you're excited to see it, but the person
with you is being a snob or being a jerk. It's
like that can disrupt the entire experience.
And so, or they're ignoring you. There's so many
ways we can get that wrong. So let's dive back
into building strength and alignment with team
members. What's something that can be done weekly
or monthly or quarterly? I think that you and
I are in alignment because I was just thinking
we have to get back on that. And that's exactly
what you said. When it comes to daily, we were
talking about being able to ground yourself before
you make those decisions and paying attention
to who you're meeting with. At the end of the
day, making sure that you actually clock out,
especially if you're the one in charge and you
see things from a bigger perspective. Let's say
you're the leader of an entire division or you're
the entrepreneur. You need to be able to turn
your brain off because. All of those trying to
figure out the solutions, let your brain run
wild while you sit in silence. If you need to
vent to chat GPT to have it reflect back to you,
do that. If you need to journal it, write everything
down, either handwriting it or typing it or just
saying it out loud. It doesn't matter, but you
do need to get it out of you. And then you have
to close everything and stop working because
the insights will actually come. Right. That's
where you get everything out. And then all of
the problems that you need to solve, the information
is going to slowly come in. So you need to implement
those things daily. And then weekly there there
has to be some kind of self -care regimen, whether
you work out regularly or you. I don't work on
the weekends and sometimes I'll make it a three
day weekend because the week has been so hard.
You know, even yes, bills need to get paid. I'm
not saying that's not the case, but if I don't
check out, I won't be good on Monday. You know,
those types of exercises or practices, and then
you have to keep it as disciplined as you can
to make sure that it's consistent because you're
training your nervous system. I'm going to throw
another thing in there for that. So on the team
member side, my friends, we do a meeting at two
o 'clock on Fridays and we call it level up,
calm down. And so it's still productive meeting,
but we're not allowed to talk about anything
stressful. We're not allowed to talk about anything
related to fires in the company. We have all
morning to knock those things out. And so the
reason why we chose two o 'clock is we're still
at the midpoint of the day, but now it's like
a, it's a break room opportunity, but virtually,
and it's an hour and a half long. And oftentimes
we do show and tell. of like, what do we do this
week? Or what are we grateful for? Who are we
grateful for on the team? We might even bust
out karaoke once in a while. We've been in that
a long time. We need to get back to it. But the
thing about this meeting and what I've seen is
it gives all of us the chance to reset, get centered.
I get to recognize who's antsy, who's anxious,
who wants to talk about the fire and the stress.
And so the team members who get rejuvenated by
that, I see them crush it through the end of
their Friday. They always fly out and just go
get things done. Nobody's dragging to the end
of the weekend. And then I get to check in with
all my team members going into the weekend and
make sure that everybody's good. That's my number
one responsibility on my Fridays. And it's always
on my heart. It's like, okay, I got to get so
-and -so. And by the time we're moving into Friday,
if all my team members are good and they're calm.
or they're happy, that's even better. Then I
get to also be able to rest a little bit easier
on the weekend. And guess what happens on Monday?
Everybody comes back to work excited. Everybody
comes back to work ready to go because we take
that time every single week to make sure that,
again, we're leveling up, but we're also calm
and taking time to appreciate. And so it's a
super hack for virtual companies that I don't
hear about very many people doing. Well, I appreciate
that you do that and that you said it for, you
know, the listeners to know, too. And I do a
similar practice whenever we have our meetly
roundup. The initial part of it is always the
tasks and wait. How are you? And the reason for
that is twofold. One, because of exactly what
you just said, they decompressed and then they're
more effective. But that's actually the way our
brains work. If I'm thinking about all the fires
and the to -dos and the tasks, then I'm actually
in task mode. I'm not in connection mode. And
you actually make more, you are more effective
when you've had connection when you go into task
mode because you're now aligned. Oh, it's huge.
your brain waves are now in alignment because
your nervous system has opened and decompressed.
So even if we spend, it's an hour and a half
meeting as well. And let's say we spend 30 minutes
on connecting, seeing how the kids are, seeing
what you're doing this weekend, you know, what
happened last night, things like that, where
I need to just see how my team is. then what's
going to happen is we actually, we get through
things so much faster, so much easier. We're
fluid and we're together. Huge. Oh, I love it.
Guys, these are multi -billion dollar secrets,
by the way. They really are. Like if companies
really large put these into practice, it would
change everything for the better for them. And
your NPS, your net promoter scores would go up.
Everything would go up for your business. And
so I highly recommend it. This is also helping
me refine the process because there are certain
disciplines that... I'm getting better at, but
I still need to intentionally move more towards.
And so one of them is like, I used to not think
about, I would just write in like, what do we
do? How are we doing? And I just get right down
to the business rather than talking first about
how we are. And then Monday mornings in the group
environment, sometimes it's hard to know, like,
how do we address? Because everybody has a different
end. You know, somebody's relative could have
died. Somebody's dog could have died. There's
many things that can happen. And so we don't
always come in Monday mornings with our own emotions
as the scope. of what needs to take place in
the meeting. And so we do a, we do a, the old
value thing of like, Hey, how's everybody doing
today? I'm good or bad. You know, let's, let's
see it. And I can do a better job of making sure
to register and know who's where, but I think
that my leadership will go to another level.
If I, instead of trying to find out and take
care right there in front of everybody, if instead
of afterwards. I come to them and, you know,
give them a personal call and say, hey, you good?
You know, is everything okay? You know, and can
I do anything for you? That would be probably
my next step for our Monday morning meetings
to improve that. So visionaries, if I can do
an interview, I need to applicate at the same
time. I'm so sorry. Say that one more time. You
cut out? Yeah. Okay. I'm glad you let me know.
Visionaries, if I can do an interview and simultaneously
take notes about how I can improve, every single
one of you listening in can do the same thing.
You can apply so much from what we've talked
about today to your life. And I hope that you
apply the best of this to what you're going through,
what you're learning. If you want to connect
with either one of us, Dr. Jacqueline Campbell
or myself, we're both available. You can find
us on Facebook, LinkedIn, elsewhere, wherever
we're at. Just Google or chat GPTN and you'll
find us. Mentors love to help people. That's
what we're here for. And if you see a greater
opportunity to work with us at higher levels,
by all means. Dive into your best opportunity.
Use a brand new blog as well to start learning.
How do I delegate better? How do I make the right
hiring decisions? Why should I not turn to a
coach for these decisions? Great article on that.
And so you got to find the right coaches. I want
to give an honor to Coach Fletcher Ellingson.
He is one of my personal coaches. Phenomenal,
phenomenal coach. And honor one more thing that
Dr. Jacqueline Campbell said. On my calendar,
I have a daily trauma work. that 8 .20 to 8 .49
in the morning is my daily trauma work. And it
is a combination of having coached with Fletcher.
And of course, all the resources I've ever learned
about therapy combined with ChatGPT. Now I would
use Claude instead, but basically pulling together
the exercises and exploring what do other of
the best coaches in the world have and recommend
for these scenarios. We can always refine our
access to great leadership if we're willing to.
That's my final tip for the day. Dr. Jacqueline,
if this was your last chance to talk to visionary
leaders, what would your counsel be for them?
What I would say is something that we don't realize
until we've already messed it up is the higher
you are in the, let's say, hierarchy. I don't
really want to use that word, but that's the
way we see it, right? the less you're actually
doing the tasks because what we were just talking
about in meetings, we go from connection mode
to task mode. And the higher you are, the more
in connection mode you need to be because you
eventually will get to not doing any tasks and
just connecting and mentoring people to make
sure that they can stay on task. That is a huge
mind changer because you're changing your identity
too. You have to eventually let go the more you
move up of those tasks, which is actually letting
go of control too. I travel internationally with
one book and it is The Effective Executive by
Dr. Peter Drucker. And as much as I've studied
and referenced that book, neither he nor anybody
else has ever opened my eyes to that concept
the way that you just did. I thank you for that.
And I know that again, other visionaries, if
you're just catching in right now, I highly recommend
going back and listening to this whole episode.
We'll see you next episode of Vision Pros Live.
Thank you for being here today. I'm really happy
that you tuned in to Vision Pros Live. I'm looking
forward to seeing your reactions as these episodes
continue to move forward. This is going to get
more and more fun. We'll have more and more engagement
as well. We'll invite people to participate in
the show. And thank you for giving us your time
and attention. Have an excellent time building
out your vision.