Hey everybody, welcome back to another episode
of Vision Pros Live. I'm your host and coach,
Fletcher Ellingson. Welcome to the show. I'm
so glad you're here. I'm so glad that you're
in this conversation. Why? Because this is where
we meet movers and shakers. This is where we
meet people who have gone through it. This is
where we meet people who have gone through it
to the extent that they have some insight and
they can make your experience of going through
it maybe a little bit less painful. maybe a little
bit more smoother, maybe a little bit more joyful.
We're talking to people who have been through
it. And our guest today is Rhonda Britton. And
guess what? She's been through it. And she's
going to talk to you a little bit about this
thing called fear and how to deal with it, how
to navigate it. It's real. You may be listening
to this and thinking, fear, oh boy, I'm familiar
with that. I got fear of people. I got fear of
the future. I got fear of losing it all. I got
fear of making mistakes. I got fear of looking
bad. I got fear of success. We all got it. You
can't get away from it, but you can navigate
it. So Rhonda, welcome to the show. Thank you
so much, Fletcher. I'm so excited to be here.
My favorite topic, how to get through it and
where does fear fit in? And of course, a vision.
These are my three favorite things. I love it.
I love it. Well, we are going to get into it.
But before we do that, start me off with something
that's going well in your life, either professionally
or personally, because we want to remind people
that despite the high levels of suffering and
uncertainty that are in this world, there's still
good happening and we can be the cause in the
matter of that good. Well, I'm going to talk
about going through it and then I'm going to
tell you the exciting stuff that's going on because,
you know, I went through a dark night and when
I Emerge from my dark night. I didn't emerge
like visionary. I didn't emerge Rhonda Brittain,
who had four books and three TV shows and on
Oprah. I didn't emerge as that person. I emerged
something else. I emerged as another more compassionate,
more humane, more loving human being, hopefully.
And I never got clear. It just kept on kind of
like, you know, you see it. And I knew what my
vision was. I knew what my mission was. It's
always been the same. But I never felt the clarity
that I had when I first began. And I want to
say, I want everyone to hear me. This February,
it hit me like a and I feel as clear today. as
the day that the sky opened up and gave me my
mission and told me what I'm supposed to do with
my life. And I didn't believe it. And I didn't
want to do it because who am I to do it? But
I did it eventually. And that's how clear I feel
now. So I am really excited. My vision is, you
know, I'm always about fearless living. I'm always
about living the life your soul intended. I'm
always about there's nothing wrong with you.
It's just feared. And right now I am turning
65. Oh, it's true. It's true. It's true. It's
true. It's true. And I have really emerged as
I want to share every single thing I know because
I don't want it to die within me, right? Like
I'm not dying with this in me. And I have a Ivy
League coaching program. I have trained coaches
on how to master fear with their clients. And
I am. in the verge of just creating a brand new
podcast called The Coaching Code for coaches,
therapists, leaders, anybody who wants to know
everything in my brain that I've used for the
last 30 years to coach people into transformation.
I've just finished a fear book. So I've got a
new fear book coming out soon with the workbook.
And you're going to be able to find your wheel
of fear and your wheel of freedom. So, I mean,
I am literally on fire. There's like literally
no moment I am not excited and clear. and so
driven. And that hasn't been true because when
you're in the going through it can feel like
you're a little lost, can feel like a little
foggy and feel, you know, feel a little like,
and all I can say about that is just keep taking
steps, right? Just keep taking steps and keep
checking in on your needs and taking care of
yourself because those two things are not mutually
exclusive. Yeah. So much good stuff there. First
off. Clarity, two of the best feeling emotions
that come with clarity and relief, right? And
frequently relief is a result of clarity. And
confidence, you know, and confidence for me.
I mean, it's just, you know, I know what I'm
here to do. But, you know, just like everybody,
there are times that we feel more connected to
it than not. Right. Or we feel more alive with
it or not. Right. There are times that we know
we're going to do it. We know we're going to
keep doing it, but we don't feel turned on alive,
connected like we have in the past. And I have
to say to you, it feels so good. And so I just
want everybody who hears me right now that is
going through it right now. It is going to come
back and it is going to be better than you think.
You just have to keep your head above water and
keep. aiming for that thing that you know is
yours to do, even in your doubt, even in your
doubt, even in your doubt, you just got to keep
aiming for it. I tell my students that, have
you ever had one pure moment of inspiration,
one pure moment of vision, right? One pure moment,
last millisecond, right? Make that more real
than anything else. Make that more real than
your negative self -talk. Make that more real
than your doubts. Make that more real than your
hesitations. Make that more real than the cloud,
the fog. Make it more real than anything. And
just keep aiming for it, even if you can't see
it, even if you can't feel it, even if you don't
believe it. Just keep aiming for that. And you
know what? It's going to come and greet you.
And when it greets you, you're going to be clear
again. I believe you. And if you're listening
to this and you're like, dang, I want some of
that feel good energy. You know, then, then first
of all, you got to visit Rhonda at her website.
What's the website domain name? Fearlessliving
.org. And I'll give everyone who's listening
one of my free courses, not one of my, one of
my courses for free, fearlessliving .org forward
slash risk, R -I -S -K, fearlessliving .org forward
slash risk, R -I -S -K. And it's stretch risk
and die class. And it's basically about how to.
to eliminate procrastination from our life. And
I'm going to, in the third, there's three 15
minute videos. That's it. And in the third video,
I actually talk all about the wheel of fear.
So go over there. There's worksheets, workbook,
there's templates, everything you need to start
really moving forward. Cause that's what stretchers
can die exercises. It's about moving forward
and go and do that. Fearlessliving .org forward
slash risk. Yeah. Get yourself some momentum.
Go visit her, sign up for that. You know, momentum.
I love this. And that's what you're helping people
do is create momentum. And I love this idea of
momentum. And, you know, my clients are like,
well, yeah, but how do you create it? Well, you
create it by ensuring your thinking is in alignment
without, well, I mean, your thinking is in alignment
with your desired outcome. And that's what Rhonda
was just talking about, taking those steps, keeping
that aim, right? You were keeping that desired
outcome in front of you. Even if you don't feel
it. Go get yourself some momentum. Exactly. Even
if you don't feel it, right? Even if you feel
like, oh, my God, I'm doing it really crappy.
Oh, my God, I feel like I'm losing it. It doesn't
matter. Just keep going that way. Yes, exactly.
Thanks for saying that. Because a lot of people
don't feel successful. And I think people confuse
success with accomplishment. What you're talking
about in my book is success. It's when you know
who you are, you know your desired outcome, and
you continue to take action in the direction
of that desired outcome. If you're doing that,
I want you to hear that you're successful. You
may not have the desired accomplishment yet,
right? Yeah. 100%. 100%. 100%. I love that you
said that. It is 100%. It is, you know, when
they say it's not the person who falls down,
it's the person who gets up. You know, we've
heard that cliche, right? But when you're in
the middle of it, we don't remember about getting
up. We don't remember because we're tired and
we have needs and we're feeling, you know, sorry
for ourselves and we're feeling resentful. And
we're like, what the heck? I work really hard.
How can this person over here be getting success
when I've been... I mean, I've been doing this
30 years. So, right. I started coaching 30 years
ago. I was one of the first coaches. And so when
I was going through my dark night and I'm, you
know, I try not to look around. I try not to
compare and compete, of course. Right. But when
I did come up and look for air and there's all
these people, it looked like they were speeding
past me. And I kept going round to Britain, around
to Britain. around Britain, there is no one that
can replace you. And there's no one that can
replace you, right? There's no one that can replace
me. They may look more accomplished or successful
or whatever you want to label it. But you, I
agree with Fletcher so much that you just moving
forward, you are ahead of the game and you are
a success. Don't worry, it will come out to meet
you. It will, your vision, your calling will
come to meet you. You just literally have to
keep walking. And again, remember, you don't
have to believe it. You don't have to feel it.
You don't have to, you don't, you don't have
to do any of that. Don't worry about like, I'm
not feeling it. Who cares? Just keep walking.
I don't believe it. I don't care. Keep walking.
Yes. Yes. Yeah. I mean, most of the time I don't
feel like going to the gym, right? Most of the
time I don't feel like getting out of bed, but
come on. If we did everything just based entirely
on our feelings, we would not be living. very
fulfilling lives that's right so look if you're
listening to this and and you're and you're identifying
with it if you're like yeah i mean that is me
like i'm not feeling it i'm feeling like throwing
in the towel you gotta get in you gotta get in
proximity to people like rhonda all right proximity
is access to clarity proximity is access to power
proximity is access to progress so if you're
listening to this what i want you to know is
you're in proximity to something great here all
right just go to the website put in the email
get the get the the content and start working
it and get some inspiration that's right yeah
That's right. That's right. So I love that you
said that because it's, you know, we are all
like you and I have energetic fields, right?
And you and I, as we speak and as we sit and
as we're quiet or as we're loud, as we're laughing,
create an energetic field. And anybody who's
listening to you and I right now are in absolutely
our energetic field. And so everything that's
true for me and everything that's true for you
is true for them. They wouldn't be here otherwise.
They are in our tribe. They are in our family.
They are in our soul family. Otherwise, they
would not be here. So what's true for me is true
for anyone listening. What's true for you is
true for them is true for me. So that's the thing.
When you find your vibration, and again, I know
that sounds woo -woo, and I'm much more practical
than that, but I do like a little woo -woo once
in a while. But when you're caught in that vibration,
when you decide to be in that vibration, don't
doubt your worth to be there. That's none of
your business. If you are attracted to it, you
belong there. And maybe, like I said just a minute
ago, you're in Fletcher and I's tribe, right?
We're in our soul family. And maybe we're here
right now because we made an agreement to hold
each other up. So allow us, let us hold you,
let us hold you right now while you're finding
your way. You know, I just got clarity in February.
Okay. So, right. And I've been, I was walking
in the dark. Right. And then when I got clarity,
I was like, I could feel, I could breathe again,
but I didn't stop walking when I couldn't see.
Yeah. Thanks for saying all of that. This is,
we need to be reminded of this so frequently,
you know, because motivation. short -lived okay
so we need this inspiration yeah and by the way
that whole thing about vibration if it sounds
gosh you know what smarter guys way smarter guys
and and women than than than me have said this
long ago nikola tesla he said hey look if you
want to find out the deepest things about the
universe that's right learn everything you can
about vibration and frequency that's right that's
right right So it's that, you know, one of the
things that Fletcher runs on a particular frequency
and a particular vibration, and so do I. And
together we are here. So if you're listening,
if you're watching, that means you also, somewhere
inside you also vibrate at that vibration, right?
You're all also at that frequency. So that's
what to lean on. Again, you don't have to believe
it. You don't have to even feel it. I really
can't emphasize that enough. It's just decide
to believe what Fletcher and I are saying. Just
allow us to tell you what is true in this moment.
Decide to believe it because why not? And we're
not asking you to jump off a cliff, right? We're
not asking you to do anything. We're just asking
you to trust your own path, regardless of how
you feel about it, whether you're worthy of it.
Again, worthiness, forget about worthiness. Don't
worry about that. Again, when somebody comes
to me and says they have a worthy issue, I go,
no, you don't. You have a fear issue. It is not
a worthy issue. I feel imposter. No, you don't.
It's a fear issue. I procrastinate. No, you don't.
You're a fear issue, right? So everybody makes
up all these things that they've heard other
people say. And it's like, okay, that's all nice
language, but it all comes down to fear. And
how do you break fear? Well, get to know your
Wheel of Fear and Wheel of Freedom, of course,
which you're going to learn in that course. but
more importantly just at the basic level is just
to understand that just moving like like like
like fletcher said just moving forward in the
midst of confusion or in the midst of i don't
know is success it is you it is you being fearless
even if you're doing it crappy even if you're
doing it stumbling even if you're doing it not
very you know just not you you're like not living
up to your quote unquote potential who cares
trust me it'll come around Yeah. And I want to
highlight something you just touched on because
fear doesn't feel good. And we can't get rid
of it. We can learn to navigate it. But what
I also want our audience to hear is, look, fear,
it has an important message. And for me, one
of the most important messages that it's saying
is this thing that you're feeling fearful right
now about you don't have freedom. That's right.
And so for me, I got to pay attention. I'm afraid
of this. Whoa. I am lacking freedom in this area,
specific area of my life or this moment. Is that
accurate? That's right, Fletcher. You are singing
my song. You are singing my song. So freedom,
as I say, equals your capacity to live in the
unknown. So you can only have freedom to your
capacity and willingness to live in the unknown.
I just got chills. I literally just got chills.
Yes. I've been saying that for 30, I've been
beating that drum for 30 years, right? Yeah,
say it again. Freedom equals your capacity to
live in the unknown by Rhonda Britton, right?
So you, if you are afraid to take a step because
you don't know, because you're not sure of the
results, then you are not free. Just like Fletcher's
saying, just exactly what you said, Fletcher.
So your capacity to have freedom is your capacity
to live in the unknown, to take action without.
Any results guaranteed. And by the way, results
guaranteed are for wimps, right? Literally, it's
just for wimps, right? Because we, you and I,
Fletcher and I, have a vibration of courage and
risk -taking and bravery and fearlessness and
self -love. So yes, it is scary. No doubt about
it. Yet, hang out, like Fletcher said, hang out
with us, hang out whoever you're vibrating with.
who you trust and, you know, more than anything,
who's going to call you forth, who's going to
call, call you forth. You know, a lot of our
friends and family, okay, sure. They're nice
and comfortable to hang around with, but they're
not going to call you forth. So I'm sure Fletcher
does it every day right here on this podcast.
I know I do it every day with my students, with
my private clients and my workshops, et cetera.
I call you forth. That is what I do. That is
my soul call. Live the life your soul intended.
So you got to hang with people who are going
to call you forth. And when they call you forth,
hopefully you'll feel in that moment of being
called, you'll feel our arms around you, that
you're not alone. I mean, that's my intention
is that you're not alone. You're not, we're not
saying, hey. go do it and see you later. No,
we're saying, yes. Right. Yeah. Yeah. But you,
cause we all need support. No, no one's getting
out of here. It's perfection or connection. You
can't have both. And we got to have connections.
No one can get their needs met without the help
of others. So, and if you want to grow, you got
a lot of needs. And so you need other people,
right? Yeah. Oh boy. We got it. We got to pause
just for a second. Cause I really want to hammer
this concept of calling you forth. This is. To
me, this is such beautiful and loving language.
Rhonda, one of my favorite experiences is when
people have the courage, are willing to call
me forth. Yes. When they see what I'm capable
of, when they see me playing small, when they
see me hiding in fear, and they're like, not
going to let you do it, Fletcher. I see you.
You're bigger than that. I mean, they won't let
me play that small of a game. They won't let
you compromise your soul. They won't let you
compromise your soul. Yes, exactly. So what Rhonda
is saying is like, look, you've got it in you.
You've got this desire. You've got this passion.
You've got this desired outcome. Come out and
embrace it and play full out. It's time. And
get around people like her. People who have your
best interest, who see that and who are willing
to support you through that journey. And you
can come by the way, you moving forth, calling,
being called forth. You like, like Fletcher saying,
you know, just start taking action, hang out.
It might be you're lying on the couch taking
action, or it might be that you're crawling.
Okay. Yes. So you don't have to come up and be
like, I am super woman and man. No. When I was
coming through my dark night, I. I was like crawling
through glass. That's how it felt. I felt like
I was crawling through glass, but I was crawling.
Okay. And even sometimes I'd take a break. Matter,
self -love, you know, just like, just breathe
it in, Rhonda, breathe it in. And then I would
start again. So it's not about stopping and starting.
Stopping and starting is maybe where you are
on your journey. You might be in the part of
your journey where you must rest. But even that
rest, if you're needing rest, I promise you,
you're not used to resting. So that is a courageous
act. So I know during my dark night, I went to
a doctor and he said, oh, you're about to get
in the hospital if you don't, you know, like
lay down for six months. And I'm like, what?
Lay down for six months? I speak 70 % of the
time. He's like, you got to lay down for six
months. And he actually, I was actually out of
town near my, staying at my sister's. And he
said, you've got to stay at your sister's for
six months. And I went, what? So I literally
went to my sister and go. this doctor that I
just saw near your house and she lives in like
near CDC. I live in LA and I ended up staying
in DC for six months to work with this particular
doctor. And I, my job, my job was resting, eating
food that was really good for me, laughing, slow
walks. He didn't want me working out, running
any of that. And that was. calling me forth.
That was the risk for me. That was the stretch
for me. So when Fletcher and I are sitting here
talking about calling you forth, it's not about
like, come on, get going. Boom. Now for some
of you, it is, but for some of you, it's like,
okay, you know what? Just give yourself, if you
have been through it, go ahead and take a nap
right now. Just go ahead and do that. Because
I promise you, when you nurture yourself and
love yourself, you are going to wake up and you're
going to feel more willing and energized and
ready. So don't. fight yourself don't fight your
energy field you know your energy needs to be
uh cared for your energy you know we only have
so much energy a day people we only have so much
energy a day and you know you gotta maintain
that energy and if you deplete it and like i
did like my god the doctor said you are and i
and i didn't feel literally i felt fine and the
only reason i believed him besides my medic my
blood work is I also went to another, a really
good friend of mine who is an acupuncturist and
a car, you know, saw this and everything. And
she lived, she moved to DC. So I'd seen her the
week before. And she said exactly what he said.
He's like, I don't know how you're standing.
You you're, you're on the verge of collapse.
I'm like, what, what are you talking about? And
then I go to him the next week. He's like, I
don't know how you're standing. I'm like, what
are you talking about? Right. So my risk was
resting. Yes. Yeah. Self -care, right? Self -care.
Yeah. That's a revolutionary idea for many of
us, especially because we've been trained to
be the Energizer bunny. That's right. And we
think success is based on how much action we
take. Yeah. And, you know, when I was resting,
what I was doing, if you think about it this
way, I was resting. It was like, imagine, you
know, imagine I'm, you know, I'm trying to I'm
thinking of Wicked, the movie Wicked. And, you
know, it's like, you know, they're calling forth.
Right. Like she's just standing there and calling
forth her energy. Right. When I'm laying in bed
at my sister's house and resting and being around
my nieces and nephews and laughing and petting
their dog and, you know, taking slow walks and
doing nothing. And and journaling and such. I
was gathering my energy back. Right. I had splintered
my energy all over and it wasn't available to
me. So as I did that, I was gathering it back.
So then when I had that energy back, I did feel
ready. It was about the six month mark. My my
blood test came back and they were he goes, I've
never seen anybody. He literally was like shocked
that I had improved so quickly. But the reason
I improved so quickly is I did what he said.
Yeah. I didn't have to do it. I did it. Then
I was able to recoup. Nice. That's another topic
for another time. Are you willing to commit?
Are you willing to commit to yourself? Are you
willing to commit to your self -care? What's
possible when we do that? Again, I want to check
in with you, our listeners. Is this resonating?
Are you identifying with any of this? You know,
soak it in. This is good news. This is a conversation
for you. We're not just talking right now just
to make each other feel good. We're here literally
for you. So I encourage you to contemplate this
and then take action. All right. Go to our website
and take a look. Read some testimonials. See
what other people have said. Those testimonials
are real. Like she said, she's been doing this
for 30 years, way before coaching was this popular
thing. I was probably one of the first five coaches
in the world. Yeah. So she's got some experience.
She's got some know. Rhonda, this has been really
inspirational for me. Personally, I'm so glad
we had this time together. We're going to wrap
up here, but again, tell people where to find
you and what are some parting words? Fearlessliving
.org forward slash risk, R -I -S -K. Go get that
stretchers can die course because I'm going to
tell you right now, you're going to feel so much
better because if you're hesitating, if you quote
unquote, call yourself a procrastinator, if you're
like, why don't I have momentum? This will explain
it. So please, three 15 minute videos in one
hour, less than an hour. you can feel better.
So just go do that. So, and the other thing that
I want everyone to hear is if you could just
take a minute right now, and if you're in a safe
place to shut your eyes, if you're driving, please
don't. But if you are in a safe place to shut
your eyes, go ahead and just shut your eyes for
a minute and do that corny thing. Put your hand
on your heart if you're willing and able to do
that. If that's not too corny for you, go ahead
and do that. And just listen to the words I'm
about to say to you. Just take them in. Let them
just seep into yourselves. There is nothing wrong
with you. It is just fear. There is nothing wrong
with you. It's just fear. Let that soak into
your cells. Let that just, you know, just push
the shame away. Just let it brush over you. Let
it brush over you and decide to believe it. Whether
you believe it or not, decide to believe it.
There's nothing wrong with you. It's just fear.
And just take a breath in. Breathe that in. What
if that's true? And breathe out anything that
doesn't believe it. And say, and I'm willing
to believe. And so it is. I'm willing to believe.
Excellent. Me too. Right on. Right on. All right.
Our guest today has been Rhonda Britton. She's
the founder of Fearless Living. You can visit
her at fearlessliving .org. And now it's time
for you all to get out there. Be a source of
kindness. Be a source of contribution. You do
have something to offer this world. And I believe
in you. Thank you for being here today. I'm really
happy that you tuned in to Vision Pros Live.
I'm looking forward to seeing your reactions
as these episodes continue to move forward. This
is going to get more and more fun. We'll have
more and more engagement as well. We'll invite
people to participate in the show. And thank
you for giving us your time and attention. Have
an excellent time building out your vision and
becoming a vision pro yourself.