WEBVTT 00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:02.299 Hey, everybody. Welcome to another episode of 00:00:02.299 --> 00:00:05.179 Vision Pros Live. I'm your host and coach, Fletcher 00:00:05.179 --> 00:00:07.919 Ellingson. And today on the show, we have Yogi 00:00:07.919 --> 00:00:13.240 Mueller. And Yogi is a author, speaker, mentor, 00:00:13.359 --> 00:00:17.859 and has written the book called The Great Slapping, 00:00:17.980 --> 00:00:20.239 which I think is such a great title. We're going 00:00:20.239 --> 00:00:23.100 to find out what that exactly means. But Yogi, 00:00:23.160 --> 00:00:25.579 first off, welcome to the show. Fletcher, thank 00:00:25.579 --> 00:00:28.120 you so much. It's truly an honor. I'm looking 00:00:28.120 --> 00:00:30.949 forward to this. right on hey i like to start 00:00:30.949 --> 00:00:32.770 out with a win because there's a lot of suffering 00:00:32.770 --> 00:00:35.369 going on in the world uh personal suffering global 00:00:35.369 --> 00:00:38.130 suffering communal suffering let's start with 00:00:38.130 --> 00:00:40.469 something that does feel good what's what's going 00:00:40.469 --> 00:00:42.490 well in your life professionally or personally 00:00:42.490 --> 00:00:45.450 well i'll tell you uh you know you mentioned 00:00:45.450 --> 00:00:48.990 the the book that was my first book and uh i 00:00:48.990 --> 00:00:53.530 was uh released by my company because of an acquisition 00:00:53.530 --> 00:00:57.130 last year And, you know, freed up to pursue my 00:00:57.130 --> 00:00:58.890 entrepreneurial dreams. And I'm like, well, you 00:00:58.890 --> 00:01:00.929 know what? I want to do something with my time 00:01:00.929 --> 00:01:03.509 that I was given. And I made that call that I'm 00:01:03.509 --> 00:01:06.310 going to write a book. And just over a year later, 00:01:06.450 --> 00:01:10.650 I have it. So people say, was it like birthing 00:01:10.650 --> 00:01:14.049 a baby? I have no empathy. I have no understanding 00:01:14.049 --> 00:01:16.930 of what that truly is like. However, yes, it 00:01:16.930 --> 00:01:20.290 was. And, you know, to be able to say that I 00:01:20.290 --> 00:01:22.489 set out to do something and accomplish it within 00:01:22.489 --> 00:01:24.599 the time frame I was looking for. That's a huge 00:01:24.599 --> 00:01:27.900 win for me personally and professionally. Yeah. 00:01:28.640 --> 00:01:31.219 So, yeah, rock and roll. Really kind of living 00:01:31.219 --> 00:01:33.420 on that high right now. Right on. Congratulations. 00:01:34.040 --> 00:01:36.780 Thank you so much. And I can relate to that. 00:01:36.840 --> 00:01:39.420 I published my first book a couple years ago. 00:01:39.780 --> 00:01:45.760 And, yes, to declare, to speak into the physical 00:01:45.760 --> 00:01:49.680 realm, I'm going to write a book and then actually 00:01:49.680 --> 00:01:53.560 follow through. through all the uh ups and downs 00:01:53.560 --> 00:01:57.120 of that process which are many uh it is not a 00:01:57.120 --> 00:02:00.799 sexy ride that's for sure exactly right i mean 00:02:00.799 --> 00:02:02.780 you really come up against yourself and learn 00:02:02.780 --> 00:02:06.719 some things absolutely yeah so so well done thank 00:02:06.719 --> 00:02:10.280 you um the great slapping i mean just kind of 00:02:10.280 --> 00:02:13.879 i mean it's such a curious title you gotta you 00:02:13.879 --> 00:02:17.319 gotta let us in on it um what does what is the 00:02:17.319 --> 00:02:20.430 great slapping So The Great Slapping is about 00:02:20.430 --> 00:02:25.550 the power of mentorship. It's about those individuals 00:02:25.550 --> 00:02:28.370 that you've had in your life. And I know, Fletcher, 00:02:28.409 --> 00:02:30.189 if you think back over your career, you've got 00:02:30.189 --> 00:02:35.210 a few of them that saw more in you than you saw 00:02:35.210 --> 00:02:37.090 in yourself at that time, whether you were unwilling 00:02:37.090 --> 00:02:41.169 to see it or unable to see it. And they were 00:02:41.169 --> 00:02:43.610 trying to push you. And eventually it might have 00:02:43.610 --> 00:02:45.409 gotten to the point where they literally grabbed 00:02:45.409 --> 00:02:48.419 you by the shoulders. shook you a little bit 00:02:48.419 --> 00:02:52.500 and with a proverbial backhand said stop it or 00:02:52.500 --> 00:02:55.300 go in this direction and the reason I call it 00:02:55.300 --> 00:02:57.860 the great slapping is because the jolt of reality 00:02:57.860 --> 00:03:00.979 that kind of moment of okay that feedback hurt 00:03:00.979 --> 00:03:03.319 there was a little bit of pain but then comes 00:03:03.319 --> 00:03:07.099 the clarity after some of those slaps and and 00:03:07.099 --> 00:03:09.439 to me that's the power of mentorship I in in 00:03:09.439 --> 00:03:12.060 the book I tell stories of when I received the 00:03:12.060 --> 00:03:15.319 slapping and when I've had to deliver it as a 00:03:15.319 --> 00:03:18.629 mentor And if you've got a great relationship 00:03:18.629 --> 00:03:20.729 with that individual, you know that that pain 00:03:20.729 --> 00:03:25.210 was delivered with love and an insane amount 00:03:25.210 --> 00:03:27.469 of passion and investing in you and your development. 00:03:27.629 --> 00:03:31.810 This is such a great message. I really hope our 00:03:31.810 --> 00:03:34.210 audience is paying attention to this. This is 00:03:34.210 --> 00:03:38.750 it is so significant when we have that person 00:03:38.750 --> 00:03:42.069 in our life to deliver that that slap. Right. 00:03:42.569 --> 00:03:46.240 Yeah, I've had. Several of those opportunities 00:03:46.240 --> 00:03:49.900 in my life where I and I was I was the person 00:03:49.900 --> 00:03:53.520 who was got to slapping. Right. And yes, uncomfortable. 00:03:54.300 --> 00:03:58.840 For sure. Very uncomfortable. But it was the 00:03:58.840 --> 00:04:01.699 catalyst I needed for that next level of growth. 00:04:02.900 --> 00:04:08.300 So very intriguing concept. So next question 00:04:08.300 --> 00:04:12.860 for you, Yogi. What's your vision? This is called 00:04:12.860 --> 00:04:16.699 Vision Pros Live. What is your vision? Well, 00:04:16.759 --> 00:04:20.740 it really has been filtered by the lens of the 00:04:20.740 --> 00:04:22.600 content of the book that I've been writing for 00:04:22.600 --> 00:04:27.199 the last year. My vision was part of why I wrote 00:04:27.199 --> 00:04:29.740 it. And that's because I fear for the future 00:04:29.740 --> 00:04:36.319 of mentorship in our society. And that's dangerous, 00:04:36.680 --> 00:04:39.699 honestly, because I see the experience going 00:04:39.699 --> 00:04:42.819 in this direction and the inexperience, the young. 00:04:43.209 --> 00:04:46.449 going in this direction and what's in the middle 00:04:46.449 --> 00:04:51.290 technology patience for one another um an inability 00:04:51.290 --> 00:04:55.350 to receive constructive feedback and not see 00:04:55.350 --> 00:04:58.889 it as an attack versus an investment and i think 00:04:58.889 --> 00:05:02.949 those things if we don't get a handle on it that's 00:05:02.949 --> 00:05:05.110 the problem and somebody says well you know why 00:05:05.110 --> 00:05:06.629 do you need a mentor when you can go to chat 00:05:06.629 --> 00:05:08.750 gpt and type and type a question you're going 00:05:08.750 --> 00:05:10.810 to get an answer I said, yeah, absolutely. The 00:05:10.810 --> 00:05:12.589 algorithm is going to get you an answer to whatever 00:05:12.589 --> 00:05:15.110 you want, whatever you put in there. But it's 00:05:15.110 --> 00:05:16.569 not going to give you the answer because they 00:05:16.569 --> 00:05:19.769 believe in you. They see your potential. They 00:05:19.769 --> 00:05:22.689 see your mistakes. You know, anytime Chachi Peek's 00:05:22.689 --> 00:05:24.470 answer is that you're God's gift to everything 00:05:24.470 --> 00:05:26.750 and they just butter you up. Well, a good mentor 00:05:26.750 --> 00:05:31.410 is not going to do that. And that's where we 00:05:31.410 --> 00:05:34.050 need to get back to in a lot of areas. And this 00:05:34.050 --> 00:05:36.529 is why the call to action is, yeah, get a mentor. 00:05:37.110 --> 00:05:41.779 Be a mentee. We need to save the practice and 00:05:41.779 --> 00:05:44.420 ensure that that time, time honored traditions. 00:05:44.480 --> 00:05:46.819 And I've got references back to Greek mythology. 00:05:48.540 --> 00:05:51.800 We need to continue it or we're going to be just 00:05:51.800 --> 00:05:56.779 as automated as cat GPT is. Yeah. So you're seeing 00:05:56.779 --> 00:06:00.939 one demographic go this way. The younger demographic 00:06:00.939 --> 00:06:03.519 go this way. And like you, what you're saying, 00:06:03.600 --> 00:06:06.019 if I'm understanding you is there's a disconnect. 00:06:07.279 --> 00:06:10.100 And in the middle is this technology, but that 00:06:10.100 --> 00:06:14.660 can't really bridge the gap in a very meaningful 00:06:14.660 --> 00:06:17.339 way. Is that accurate? That's correct. I think 00:06:17.339 --> 00:06:20.879 if you look at mentorship holistically, it is 00:06:20.879 --> 00:06:25.680 filled with nuance. And that, whether it's facial 00:06:25.680 --> 00:06:28.220 expressions, whether it's, you know, understanding 00:06:28.220 --> 00:06:31.819 your true potential, understanding, you know, 00:06:31.819 --> 00:06:34.579 where your personal opportunities are. you're 00:06:34.579 --> 00:06:37.120 not going to necessarily get that from technology. 00:06:37.339 --> 00:06:40.220 Now, we could talk AI, but we could also talk 00:06:40.220 --> 00:06:46.439 delivery of methodologies, right? The impatience 00:06:46.439 --> 00:06:49.759 of certain groups to not want to just text with 00:06:49.759 --> 00:06:52.250 somebody else. or why can't they have a phone 00:06:52.250 --> 00:06:54.290 call why can't they have a facetime conversation 00:06:54.290 --> 00:06:57.129 or a personal conversation and then the other 00:06:57.129 --> 00:06:59.250 groups are well why don't they just work with 00:06:59.250 --> 00:07:01.129 me why don't they find a happy ground why do 00:07:01.129 --> 00:07:04.009 i need to be in the same room with somebody to 00:07:04.009 --> 00:07:07.209 have a conversation with them and traditional 00:07:07.209 --> 00:07:10.470 versus new i guess is is kind of an age -old 00:07:10.470 --> 00:07:12.110 argument there and we just need to find those 00:07:12.110 --> 00:07:15.529 bridges for everybody right now some people have 00:07:15.529 --> 00:07:19.120 found a way to get across and others We don't. 00:07:19.120 --> 00:07:22.699 And honestly, Fletcher, I think one of the worst 00:07:22.699 --> 00:07:26.639 things that we can propagate is potential unrealized. 00:07:26.740 --> 00:07:31.060 To me, that hits at the core. You know, I mentioned 00:07:31.060 --> 00:07:33.879 in my book, like, you know, if we're not reaching 00:07:33.879 --> 00:07:37.220 a person in their 20s and really kind of helping 00:07:37.220 --> 00:07:38.899 them navigate things, because, you know, you 00:07:38.899 --> 00:07:41.500 hear people in the Gen Z, a lot of them feel 00:07:41.500 --> 00:07:44.500 alone. A lot of them feel that they're the most 00:07:44.500 --> 00:07:48.250 connected but disconnected generation. We can 00:07:48.250 --> 00:07:51.569 help with that. We just, when I say we, the more 00:07:51.569 --> 00:07:56.209 experienced, the gray hair here, we have experience 00:07:56.209 --> 00:07:58.949 that we can share. But if we don't have the patience 00:07:58.949 --> 00:08:00.889 to find that middle ground too, that's a problem 00:08:00.889 --> 00:08:04.490 as well. So that's what I'm seeing. It's a divergence. 00:08:04.769 --> 00:08:07.889 I don't see a full, complete split. However, 00:08:08.069 --> 00:08:10.870 if that divergence continues, the fabric is going 00:08:10.870 --> 00:08:15.360 to tear. Yeah, yeah. You're seeing that trajectory. 00:08:15.459 --> 00:08:18.639 You're seeing that pattern play out. And I like 00:08:18.639 --> 00:08:21.040 your analogy there. Yeah, the fabric will tear. 00:08:22.199 --> 00:08:25.360 And then when that happens, yeah, then you've 00:08:25.360 --> 00:08:28.279 got a real crisis on your hand. There's a real 00:08:28.279 --> 00:08:31.600 division at that point. So I love this conversation. 00:08:31.720 --> 00:08:35.059 I'm a huge fan of mentorship. I'm a mentor myself. 00:08:35.259 --> 00:08:38.220 I'm in an official capacity with a high school 00:08:38.220 --> 00:08:45.070 student. It is invaluable. It's so important. 00:08:45.289 --> 00:08:51.169 The difference that a person can make in another 00:08:51.169 --> 00:08:56.690 person's life is incredible just an hour to a 00:08:56.690 --> 00:09:02.090 week. It is when a young person has an opportunity 00:09:02.090 --> 00:09:08.710 to and is open to learning, right? huge potential 00:09:08.710 --> 00:09:12.370 there. I'll give you just a quick example. With 00:09:12.370 --> 00:09:17.149 this particular person I'm mentoring, hardworking 00:09:17.149 --> 00:09:21.809 individual, has some struggles in school and 00:09:21.809 --> 00:09:24.649 zero knowledge about finances. Hardworking, has 00:09:24.649 --> 00:09:29.710 a job, but blows all his money right away. So 00:09:29.710 --> 00:09:33.450 as a result, of our conversation about finance, 00:09:33.629 --> 00:09:35.730 I realized like what he really wants to do is 00:09:35.730 --> 00:09:40.490 be an entrepreneur and have wealth. But he has 00:09:40.490 --> 00:09:43.250 zero head knowledge about it. So we started talking 00:09:43.250 --> 00:09:48.350 about opening up a bank account, investing, opening 00:09:48.350 --> 00:09:51.250 up an E -Trade account. And his eyes just like 00:09:51.250 --> 00:09:57.389 got so big when he began to see what is possible, 00:09:57.549 --> 00:10:01.179 right? And just a simple conversation like that 00:10:01.179 --> 00:10:05.100 could change the trajectory of an individual's 00:10:05.100 --> 00:10:07.639 life. And I'm not taking the credit for that. 00:10:07.779 --> 00:10:09.940 I'm just saying that that's what's possible when 00:10:09.940 --> 00:10:14.240 we open ourselves up to relating to people in 00:10:14.240 --> 00:10:17.940 this manner. Now, first of all, I knew that you 00:10:17.940 --> 00:10:21.220 were impacted by mentorship, both as a recipient 00:10:21.220 --> 00:10:24.320 and a purveyor of it. And this happens a lot 00:10:24.320 --> 00:10:26.179 when I talk about the book or I get messages 00:10:26.179 --> 00:10:30.009 from readers. They read it. And I can see your 00:10:30.009 --> 00:10:32.889 Rolodex going, right? I can see you reviewing 00:10:32.889 --> 00:10:35.389 those relationships that you had and that you're 00:10:35.389 --> 00:10:38.169 currently at and the impact that that was created. 00:10:38.850 --> 00:10:41.309 So absolutely knew you were somebody rooted there. 00:10:41.429 --> 00:10:45.090 I think you hit it right on the nose when it 00:10:45.090 --> 00:10:48.909 comes to that accountability, that self -accountability 00:10:48.909 --> 00:10:51.549 piece, opening yourself up to learning. You know, 00:10:51.570 --> 00:10:53.710 one of the things that I created is what we call 00:10:53.710 --> 00:10:56.289 the embrace the grit mindset or the grit. And 00:10:56.289 --> 00:10:59.590 I have a grit index assessment. And it stands 00:10:59.590 --> 00:11:01.490 for get over yourself, reassess with honesty, 00:11:01.629 --> 00:11:03.090 invest in improvement, and treasure the lessons 00:11:03.090 --> 00:11:04.830 of growth. Because I think fundamentally, that's 00:11:04.830 --> 00:11:07.850 where you need to start. You have to work with 00:11:07.850 --> 00:11:09.690 somebody. And this goes for mentors as well. 00:11:09.929 --> 00:11:12.370 That is open to feedback. That does understand 00:11:12.370 --> 00:11:14.870 that even though it slaps, there's always a kernel 00:11:14.870 --> 00:11:18.929 of truth in every piece of feedback. And if you're 00:11:18.929 --> 00:11:20.750 not open to it, I'm throwing darts at a wall 00:11:20.750 --> 00:11:22.330 that doesn't even have the board, right? And 00:11:22.330 --> 00:11:24.600 I'm just kind of wasting my time. Right. But 00:11:24.600 --> 00:11:27.700 I love what you said. It doesn't take a lot of 00:11:27.700 --> 00:11:29.519 investment. It just takes maybe just a brief 00:11:29.519 --> 00:11:31.840 moment of time. I'm going to share a story from 00:11:31.840 --> 00:11:34.440 the book. I was teaching grad school and I had 00:11:34.440 --> 00:11:36.539 a young young man in my class. I'm young. He 00:11:36.539 --> 00:11:38.740 was probably 26, 27. He was more established. 00:11:40.559 --> 00:11:43.740 Smartest kid I knew. And he was so passionate 00:11:43.740 --> 00:11:46.580 and had so much potential. But he would show 00:11:46.580 --> 00:11:48.799 up to late work or show up to class late. He 00:11:48.799 --> 00:11:51.620 was sloppy. He didn't turn in assignments. And 00:11:51.620 --> 00:11:55.259 I never saw him apply that potential that was 00:11:55.259 --> 00:11:59.299 so palpably obvious in him. So I pulled him aside 00:11:59.299 --> 00:12:02.000 one day, and I basically laid into him. I said, 00:12:02.039 --> 00:12:04.179 what the hell are you doing? You are smart. You're 00:12:04.179 --> 00:12:06.179 creative. You're talented, blah, blah, blah. 00:12:06.179 --> 00:12:08.240 And I just went off on him. And I said, why? 00:12:09.399 --> 00:12:12.299 You have so much value. Why aren't you bringing 00:12:12.299 --> 00:12:14.779 it to the table? And this 27 -year -old kid or 00:12:14.779 --> 00:12:19.019 so starts crying. I felt horrible, right? But 00:12:19.019 --> 00:12:24.100 he was like. Nobody has ever told me that. It 00:12:24.100 --> 00:12:27.500 was a gut punch, Fletcher. Absolute gut punch. 00:12:28.059 --> 00:12:31.019 His teachers, his guidance counselors, even his 00:12:31.019 --> 00:12:35.820 parents either told him physically that he was 00:12:35.820 --> 00:12:37.840 worth, he was not going to accomplish anything, 00:12:38.019 --> 00:12:40.500 or just the way that he treated, he internalized 00:12:40.500 --> 00:12:43.139 that. And you talk about that roadblock that 00:12:43.139 --> 00:12:45.899 that potential hit, it was just that one comment 00:12:45.899 --> 00:12:49.139 literally can change the trajectory of somebody's 00:12:49.139 --> 00:12:52.460 life. Yeah. A lot of power. A lot of power. So 00:12:52.460 --> 00:12:57.080 much power, right? Yeah. Words matter. And our 00:12:57.080 --> 00:13:02.120 willingness to step up and offer feedback is 00:13:02.120 --> 00:13:06.019 so important. And I want to bring one distinction 00:13:06.019 --> 00:13:09.179 to this conversation because I really appreciate 00:13:09.179 --> 00:13:11.659 that conversation you had with that young man. 00:13:13.120 --> 00:13:19.769 Frequently, we are reluctant to provide. authentic 00:13:19.769 --> 00:13:23.149 feedback because of a conversation in our head 00:13:23.149 --> 00:13:28.009 which is oh that might offend them that might 00:13:28.009 --> 00:13:30.169 hurt their feelings i don't know if they can 00:13:30.169 --> 00:13:33.049 handle that and and the point that i want to 00:13:33.049 --> 00:13:37.649 make is what we're doing is we're making that 00:13:37.649 --> 00:13:41.809 person small we've we've decided we've decided 00:13:41.809 --> 00:13:46.149 that they can't handle it and that's a huge disservice 00:13:47.019 --> 00:13:52.320 Instead of thinking, you know what? This person 00:13:52.320 --> 00:13:55.059 could benefit potentially from this feedback 00:13:55.059 --> 00:13:58.039 and I'm going to trust that they can handle it. 00:13:59.139 --> 00:14:02.240 And I'm going to trust that we can have that 00:14:02.240 --> 00:14:05.539 conversation and that something good will come 00:14:05.539 --> 00:14:10.259 of it. Right. Both are stories in our head. Right. 00:14:10.360 --> 00:14:12.240 And it's just and which one do you want to focus 00:14:12.240 --> 00:14:15.389 on? You know, I think that that's one of the 00:14:15.389 --> 00:14:17.289 reasons why I fear. Right. Because there's this 00:14:17.289 --> 00:14:20.250 general and I'm generalizing here. Right. But 00:14:20.250 --> 00:14:25.490 there is this overlay where people are offended 00:14:25.490 --> 00:14:29.490 easily these days and they take things as attack 00:14:29.490 --> 00:14:33.870 and they take it as personal. And so I can see 00:14:33.870 --> 00:14:36.629 somebody with that apprehension about not wanting 00:14:36.629 --> 00:14:39.409 to share that because you might get a full volley 00:14:39.409 --> 00:14:41.210 back at you. And it definitely wasn't intended. 00:14:41.409 --> 00:14:45.269 Right. I think. One of the things I talk about 00:14:45.269 --> 00:14:47.710 is the foundations of mentorship. And that is, 00:14:47.809 --> 00:14:51.870 first and foremost, trust. That if that trust 00:14:51.870 --> 00:14:54.269 doesn't exist, you're not going to get that dialectic 00:14:54.269 --> 00:14:56.970 conversation with an open understanding that 00:14:56.970 --> 00:15:01.309 this person is investing in me. Yeah. And that 00:15:01.309 --> 00:15:03.750 comes with relationships. So one of the next 00:15:03.750 --> 00:15:07.350 kind of phase I'm working through is the difference 00:15:07.350 --> 00:15:10.409 between coach and a mentor. And I think mentor 00:15:10.409 --> 00:15:14.129 is a loaded word. And it comes with a lot of 00:15:14.129 --> 00:15:19.250 baggage that not might just intimidate the mentees. 00:15:19.629 --> 00:15:22.029 It might intimidate people that really could 00:15:22.029 --> 00:15:25.529 be mentors as well because of all the loaded 00:15:25.529 --> 00:15:29.909 emotional side that mentorship has. And so I'm 00:15:29.909 --> 00:15:33.250 going to campaign right now to if companies are 00:15:33.250 --> 00:15:35.809 starting mentorship programs, maybe don't call 00:15:35.809 --> 00:15:39.519 that that. Because about 70 percent of all mentorship 00:15:39.519 --> 00:15:41.559 programs and organizations fail within the first 00:15:41.559 --> 00:15:43.659 year. And I'm kind of working through some of 00:15:43.659 --> 00:15:48.259 that. So I 100 percent agree with you that that 00:15:48.259 --> 00:15:51.500 fear, that apprehension of listening to the feedback 00:15:51.500 --> 00:15:54.279 or even delivering it is part of that divide 00:15:54.279 --> 00:15:56.919 that's ripping the fabric of this. We need to 00:15:56.919 --> 00:15:59.960 find we need to find that solution. Yeah, absolutely. 00:16:00.440 --> 00:16:04.279 Absolutely. And like you said, yeah, establish 00:16:04.279 --> 00:16:07.340 trust. you know like work on work on always you 00:16:07.340 --> 00:16:10.279 know lead with um a way of being that allows 00:16:10.279 --> 00:16:13.259 for people to trust you and people are willing 00:16:13.259 --> 00:16:17.320 to trust us when they feel heard supported and 00:16:17.320 --> 00:16:21.379 they feel safe absolutely 100 right yeah and 00:16:21.379 --> 00:16:24.259 yeah and it's okay so then you're absolutely 00:16:24.259 --> 00:16:26.799 right so what then has to happen is the more 00:16:26.799 --> 00:16:29.779 traditional communicators need to figure out 00:16:29.779 --> 00:16:33.679 a way the less or the nuanced communicators right 00:16:33.980 --> 00:16:36.940 Because face -to -face communication, and again, 00:16:37.019 --> 00:16:39.860 I'm being very general, tends to be threatening, 00:16:40.000 --> 00:16:44.200 tends to be overloaded or way too much input 00:16:44.200 --> 00:16:47.120 for that person to process. So we need to figure 00:16:47.120 --> 00:16:49.240 out a way to do that to bridge that gap. And 00:16:49.240 --> 00:16:51.759 that's part of the technology divide. Yeah, yeah. 00:16:53.360 --> 00:16:55.000 I'm going to switch gears a little bit because 00:16:55.000 --> 00:16:59.440 people listening to this conversation, they might 00:16:59.440 --> 00:17:02.700 think, yeah, there's value in this. the mentor 00:17:02.700 --> 00:17:05.380 -mentee relationship, but I don't think I have 00:17:05.380 --> 00:17:08.859 any skills to offer as a mentor. Could you address 00:17:08.859 --> 00:17:11.359 that concern that people might be thinking in 00:17:11.359 --> 00:17:17.500 their head? Absolutely. So one of my early readers 00:17:17.500 --> 00:17:24.299 of the book messaged me and said, I never considered 00:17:24.299 --> 00:17:29.640 myself a mentor until I read your book. And I've 00:17:29.640 --> 00:17:32.309 known this person for a long time. And I said, 00:17:32.329 --> 00:17:34.690 do you realize that you were a Girl Scout leader 00:17:34.690 --> 00:17:39.130 for 15 years and you work with these girls since 00:17:39.130 --> 00:17:42.150 they were like eight? And now most of them have 00:17:42.150 --> 00:17:44.390 gone on to be, you know, the full time permanent 00:17:44.390 --> 00:17:48.230 Girl Scouts. And I said, you weren't just teaching 00:17:48.230 --> 00:17:50.690 them how to sell cookies. You were you. They 00:17:50.690 --> 00:17:53.130 would call you if they needed life advice. They 00:17:53.130 --> 00:17:56.809 would call you for your experience. You slap 00:17:56.809 --> 00:18:01.519 them often. Not just within the constraints of 00:18:01.519 --> 00:18:05.880 Girl Scouts, but you became somebody that was 00:18:05.880 --> 00:18:08.180 important to them outside of that structure. 00:18:08.660 --> 00:18:12.140 You believed in them. You invested in them, not 00:18:12.140 --> 00:18:14.480 because you had some sort of pin that said you 00:18:14.480 --> 00:18:17.059 were a Girl Scout leader. You gave them this 00:18:17.059 --> 00:18:19.460 information. You educated. You developed them 00:18:19.460 --> 00:18:24.920 because you believed in them. And my oldest daughter, 00:18:25.099 --> 00:18:28.950 I count as one of her mentees. because she played 00:18:28.950 --> 00:18:31.869 such an important part in her development and 00:18:31.869 --> 00:18:37.049 i said don't ever diminish your thinking and 00:18:37.049 --> 00:18:38.509 where you were and she said well i always thought 00:18:38.509 --> 00:18:40.789 mentors were something in a business where it 00:18:40.789 --> 00:18:43.869 was like structured and it was all about uh you 00:18:43.869 --> 00:18:45.430 know getting this person ready for this other 00:18:45.430 --> 00:18:49.250 position i said no so yeah there are people out 00:18:49.250 --> 00:18:51.809 there that have been mentors but don't have the 00:18:51.809 --> 00:18:55.650 the the understanding to open themselves up to 00:18:55.650 --> 00:18:59.190 yes yes they were right yeah and and i also kind 00:18:59.190 --> 00:19:01.230 of demystified a little bit because like i said 00:19:01.230 --> 00:19:04.569 mentorship is a loaded word and it's scary for 00:19:04.569 --> 00:19:07.230 some people because it requires emotional investment 00:19:07.230 --> 00:19:11.009 in there but you know the bottom line fletcher 00:19:11.009 --> 00:19:14.210 is is if you you know if you see a seed that 00:19:14.210 --> 00:19:16.349 you know is going to be a giant tree one day 00:19:16.349 --> 00:19:19.529 you can't tell that seed to grow you can't make 00:19:19.529 --> 00:19:23.000 it grow You've got to create the scenario around 00:19:23.000 --> 00:19:25.740 it, the soil, the water, the nutrients, the sunlight, 00:19:25.740 --> 00:19:27.819 whatever it is, in order for it to fully get 00:19:27.819 --> 00:19:30.559 to where you want to be. And that's where mentorship 00:19:30.559 --> 00:19:34.059 comes in. I like the phrase happiness is planting 00:19:34.059 --> 00:19:36.299 a seed of a tree whose shade you will never enjoy. 00:19:36.799 --> 00:19:39.940 And that's what gets me up every morning. That's 00:19:39.940 --> 00:19:42.119 cool. I haven't heard that before. That's neat. 00:19:42.740 --> 00:19:46.480 Happiness is planting a seed of a tree whose 00:19:46.480 --> 00:19:50.269 shade you will never enjoy. yeah and you hinted 00:19:50.269 --> 00:19:52.029 at it too with the finance you're not looking 00:19:52.029 --> 00:19:55.390 to make money off of your your mentees you are 00:19:55.390 --> 00:19:57.289 investing in them and they're they might make 00:19:57.289 --> 00:19:59.250 a million dollars one day and you might be dead 00:19:59.250 --> 00:20:03.009 but that's not the reason why you're doing it 00:20:03.009 --> 00:20:08.250 right right yeah yeah good stuff hey uh we're 00:20:08.250 --> 00:20:10.369 coming up towards the end of our conversation 00:20:10.369 --> 00:20:15.019 here uh and i'm really appreciating and feel 00:20:15.019 --> 00:20:20.339 enthusiastic about the the message that's right 00:20:20.339 --> 00:20:23.960 that's right um boy if you've ever thought about 00:20:23.960 --> 00:20:28.240 becoming a mentor i want to encourage you if 00:20:28.240 --> 00:20:31.019 you're listening to this yeah really bring a 00:20:31.019 --> 00:20:34.769 spotlight to that And consider it. You likely 00:20:34.769 --> 00:20:38.809 have something of value to offer. I believe that 00:20:38.809 --> 00:20:41.890 we all do. We've all lived a unique experience 00:20:41.890 --> 00:20:45.250 in our lifetime. You have something to offer 00:20:45.250 --> 00:20:50.410 this world. Step into that. Embrace it. Own it. 00:20:50.569 --> 00:20:54.990 Be open to it. It may be the very thing that's 00:20:54.990 --> 00:20:58.410 going to make a big difference in someone else's 00:20:58.410 --> 00:21:01.759 life. You can change a life. Yeah, yeah. Pretty 00:21:01.759 --> 00:21:06.099 exciting. Yogi, if people want to find out more 00:21:06.099 --> 00:21:09.940 about The Great Slapping, again, I love that 00:21:09.940 --> 00:21:14.700 title. Where can they reach out to you, get a 00:21:14.700 --> 00:21:16.480 copy of the book and learn more about what you're 00:21:16.480 --> 00:21:18.980 offering? Oh, thank you. Well, you can go to 00:21:18.980 --> 00:21:22.299 craftleadership .net, which not only has links 00:21:22.299 --> 00:21:25.740 to buy the book in an e -book, Amazon, Barnes 00:21:25.740 --> 00:21:28.519 & Noble, places like that. But it also has a 00:21:28.519 --> 00:21:31.299 link to the grit index assessment to really kind 00:21:31.299 --> 00:21:34.079 of understand where's your ability to listen 00:21:34.079 --> 00:21:37.720 and do do work with feedback on there. And that 00:21:37.720 --> 00:21:39.559 that would be a kind of a one stop shop there. 00:21:39.960 --> 00:21:43.180 Right on. Right on. OK. Thanks so much for being 00:21:43.180 --> 00:21:45.900 on the show today. I'm your host and coach, Fletcher 00:21:45.900 --> 00:21:48.460 Ellingson. Thanks for joining us here on Vision 00:21:48.460 --> 00:21:51.680 Pros. Now it's your turn to get out there. Be 00:21:51.680 --> 00:21:53.799 a source of kindness. Be a source of contribution. 00:21:53.900 --> 00:21:57.039 You do have something to offer this world. And 00:21:57.039 --> 00:21:58.900 I believe in you. Thank you for being here today. 00:21:59.079 --> 00:22:00.839 I'm really happy that you tuned in to Vision 00:22:00.839 --> 00:22:03.460 Pros Live. I'm looking forward to seeing your 00:22:03.460 --> 00:22:06.259 reactions as these episodes continue to move 00:22:06.259 --> 00:22:08.200 forward. This is going to get more and more fun. 00:22:08.240 --> 00:22:10.099 We'll have more and more engagement as well. 00:22:10.119 --> 00:22:12.039 We'll invite people to participate in the show. 00:22:12.160 --> 00:22:14.220 And thank you for giving us your time and attention. 00:22:14.500 --> 00:22:17.140 Have an excellent time building out your vision 00:22:17.140 --> 00:22:18.519 and becoming a vision pro yourself.