Please do me a favor. Share your first name,
last name, the name of your company and all the
things that you do. Well, good morning. Good
to be back. I've had a great time last time.
I'm Patrick Donatio. I'm a communication strategist,
executive coach and educator. And I'm also the
author of the book, Communicating with Impact.
So I work with people who want to improve the
way they communicate to build deeper relationships,
enhance their. connections with others, increase
their revenues, and most importantly, get greater
results. So when I've been doing this for a couple
of years, but I really, really enjoy helping
people learn how to be a better communicator,
which as you probably know, you know, we spend
about 80 % of our waking day in some form of
communication. So it's a skill that we're using
all the time. Tell me that, you know, the difference
since this is more of your expertise, what's
the difference? Well, anybody can talk when not
everybody can communicate with impact. Right.
So to be an effective communicator, really, I
think it takes some important skill sets. And
I've created this impact process that I think
encompasses really what I think are the six keys
to really be a great communicator. So if you
don't mind, I just take like 30 seconds. And
I'll just tell you what the six keys are. And
then, you know, we can go and talk about any
of the ones you want that may be most relevant
to our viewers or listeners today. And I know
a lot of folks are entrepreneurs. And so as an
entrepreneur, you're always communicating. So
here are the six components that I think make
somebody an effective communicator. And I made
it really easy, by the way, if you know the word
impact, it's an acronym. So you'll remember the
six keys, the eyes for the intention, right?
Think before you speak. Every good communicator.
starts with a clear intention. The M is for the
message and the method. So great communicators
understand that, you know, you got to pick the
right method to communicate because sometimes
a certain method may not be effective given the
intention. And then once you know the intention,
right, what do you want to say to help you achieve
the intention? It all goes back to the intention.
The P is the person. So even if you've got a
great intention, you've got a great message,
you picked the right method. You still got to
think about the person you're communicating with
because we're all different. And how do you adjust
or adapt your communication to the other person,
given their experience, their education, their
personality style? That's the IMP part. I call
IMP planning, right? The IMP of the process.
The ACT is how do you activate the message? So
A is activate. And we talk about the two critical
components that great communities need, which
is to be an active listener and to create active
engagement. The C is clarify. How do you make
sure the message you sent is the same message?
Effective communicators know that it doesn't
matter what I say. It's what people hear that's
most important. And how do I make sure we're
both on the same page? And then the T in the
process is transform. And I talk about two types
of transformations, internal transformations
and external transformations. So if you've done
everything else, but you don't think about how
do you transform your words and your actions
into the results or intention you wanted to get.
you're not going to be a great communicator.
So there it is. I mean, there's six simple tools,
six key ingredients that I think really make
for an effective communicator. The challenge
is a lot of times we don't think about all of
them or we don't even use all of them. So that's
it. I thought we would start there and then feel
free to dive into any of those or maybe share
some challenges you think our listeners might
have that I can help them with. Which one do
you find that people have the most challenge
with? Well, I think for me, it's the first one.
You know, the intention is the easiest step.
It takes the least amount of time, but it's the
one I think most people tend to skip because
we want to just jump right in. We want to just
pick up the phone. We want to just start typing.
We want to just start running down the hall and
have a conversation. And what I say is. Intent
before content. So take 60 seconds and think
for a minute, like, what's my intention for this
communication? And even if, you know. You do
all the other steps. If you don't do this step,
it's really not going to be effective. In fact,
I tell people when I teach the class, I say,
you know, after I teach this section, I say,
if you left right now, please don't. But if you
just left right now and just did the first step,
you'd be a better communicator. So the intention
step to me is probably the one that I think is
the one people tend to skip most often. What
would intention look like for them before they
go? Yeah. Let's say you're going to an after
hours event, maybe a chambers event or something
where you're going to meet a lot of potential
prospects. I would say, first of all, going with
the intention that I really want to be able to
meet and listen and learn. Cause really as a,
in my opinion, no matter what your title is,
we're all doing the same thing as entrepreneurs.
We all have the same title and the title is problem
solver. If you're a realtor, if you're a financial
planner, if you are a construction. a company,
you're all doing the same thing. We need what
I call diagnosed before we prescribe. So when
you're networking, you really want to make sure
you go out there with a lot of good questions
you could be asking to learn as much as possible.
See, a lot of people think, oh, I got to go out
there and talk, talk, talk, talk, talk, talk.
Yeah, you know, you need to be able to talk,
right? You need to be able to give your what
I call 30 second commercial, right? You should
know that. But more importantly, what you really
want to do. is get to meet people, begin to find
out what their needs are. And then really a lot
of times, you know what, if you just spend a
lot of time asking good questions and listening,
people think you're amazing. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
And you know, what's funny is you say good questions.
You can ask questions, but not all questions
are good questions. Give me, give me an idea.
The other thing too, is if you're going to an
event, you know, maybe spend a few moments intentionally
thinking, who are their ideal prospects for me?
right i mean i can go to the event and i can
meet everybody or i can think you know really
i like to work with and i'm most valuable for
you know home buyers i'm just picking on your
area so as i'm meeting people i might be finding
out if they're a home buyer and if they're not
i'm not going to go bye -bye you know but but
my goal is to find home buyers so i would do
some homework before the event i might look and
see who's registered go to the registration list
are there people that i think might be potential
home buyer or whatever your topic might be. So
the idea of networking and intention is to spend
some time in advance thinking about what the
goal or the intention is for the event. And then
the other thing I think is for a networker is,
as I call it, the BDA approach. You can tell
I got a lot of systems. But the BDA system is
really good for networking before, during, and
after. So what do I do before I go out to the
network? I have a list of people I want to meet.
I've got my 30 second elevator pitch. I got business
cards or a QR code on my phone, whatever you
need. What do I do while I'm there? Right. I
remember names. I use the names. I ask good questions.
I try to build great rapport. I try to think
of ways that I can find how I can get to connect
with them in some way. And then what do you do
after? So, you know, even though you go to an
event and you got good questions, really, the
after is the most important, because if you meet
people and you don't follow up. Then you're not
going to get any new clients. Right. So the BDA
before, during and after. And again, in every
one of those steps. Right. It's a different intention.
But there's a couple of thoughts about networking
and intention. I love that BDA before, during
and after. And I think that that would be suitable
for anyone going anywhere. You know what I mean?
Like and that's that's setting an intention of
knowing what you're going to do. So I like that.
We'll say this, the after, it's always the follow
-up. That's probably the most challenging, the
follow -up and staying in contact. I was looking
at the impact, and I would actually like for
you to explain a little bit more on the C, the
clarify a little bit. Yes. Well, the C -step
is clarify, and that is how do you make sure
the message you sent is the same message, right?
And so a lot of people think that we're in charge
of the message. But in reality, the meaning of
the message doesn't come from the sender always.
It comes a lot from the receiver. So we want
to make sure that the message we're sending is
being received effectively. So in the clarification
step, we talk about how do you check for understanding,
right? And one example for me would be, and I
go through six or seven tools when I teach the
workshop, but one tool I just want to share right
now is a summary. OK, so let's say you met a
new prospect and you're having a great conversation
and you're getting ready to wrap up and you kind
of want to make sure, you know, that we're both
on the same page. So you might do a summary.
And so there's two ways to do a summary. Most
people do what I call the summary where I go,
hey, you know, Joanne, it's so good to see you
as you wrap up. I just want to kind of check
in. So I'm kind of hearing that you're interested
in possibly finding a realtor and, you know,
you would love to maybe stay in touch and that,
which is fine. But I suggest if you haven't done
this to try the other person summary. So I'm
going to ask you, have you ever done an other
person summary? Would you get the other person
to summarize? No, no, never. So for example,
and I do this a lot when I have a coaching call,
as you wrap up, I'll say, hey, listen, as we
wrap up today, I'm kind of curious, what are
some of the takeaways you have from our call
today that you think are valuable for you? And
then instead of me saying, OK, don't forget to
do one, two, three, four, they'll go, well, I
think I'm going to do one and two and four. And
I'll say, yes, that's great. And you talked about
three. Oh, that's right. Three. I forgot about
three. So sometimes one way to clarify is to
do a summary, but maybe instead of you doing
it, to ask them to do it. So how would that look
in a networking event? Some might say, hey, you
know, as you're wrapping up, I really, really
enjoyed meeting with you. What would you say
be some of the next steps for us to do in terms
of staying in touch? Yes. And they'll say. Well,
you know, why don't you give me your card? Or,
you know, I'm looking probably not till the spring.
So can I, you know, so then they'll tell you
what they want, what they need. And then you're
going to hear what you've actually communicated.
And if they go something like, well, I'm good.
I don't really think there's a good connection
here. I mean, for me, the first thing is, well,
I'm going to have to get better at that because
obviously I didn't communicate well, right? So
that's one idea where the C -step in terms of
clarifying. It would be helpful. So I would say
if you're listening and you're an entrepreneur,
I give you a homework assignment. And that is,
what are some good clarifying questions or techniques
you could use to make sure you're both on the
same page? I gave you one, for example, the summary
technique, but come up with some great tools
so that when you're talking to a prospect, you're
really making sure that they're hearing what
you want them to hear and you're learning more
about what their needs are. What's your why?
You know, it's really interesting because my
undergrad degree is in radio and television.
And when I was growing up, I always loved to
be in front of groups and I loved helping. And
I've done a lot of volunteer work. But when I
when I started my business, you know, my big,
big why was that I wanted to be able to make
a difference. I want to make an impact. Ironically,
that's the book title. Right. But but I really
always felt that there is things that I could
be doing to make others lives better. And so
my real why is helping other people reach their
highest potential. And it just so happens that
I do that in the arena of communication skills.
But I think all of us want to be the best. And
so my job is to help people get to that point
where they can be the best. What did you do with
it other than what you're doing now? What did
you start off doing? Now I'm being nosy, Patrick.
Yeah, well, I mean, I went to college in my undergraduate
in radio and television, and I did a lot of on
-air work. I did radio. I did TV. And what I
found out very early on, though, was I didn't
like being in a booth with just a microphone
because I never got any feedback. So what I ended
up doing was I moved my major from on -air talent
to RTV management and eventually got an MBA.
But those skill sets I learned early on about
being on the air and communicating and being
concise and energetic were skills that I've used
the rest of my life. And when COVID came, right,
and we all went on our laptops, I was like dusting
off my old TV skill sets that I hadn't used in
a couple of years. But I think to me, I knew
early on that I loved communicating and I was
always fairly good at it. And I found out that
whenever I was in a position, I always got a
lot of compliments about. the kind of questions
I asked about the connections I made. So that's
just kind of moved me more towards saying, hey,
you know what? We need to listen to others. When
you want to learn your why, you know, your why
is already there. Just sometimes we have to go
back and dig a little bit to figure out where
it is because you can't just see it. Absolutely.
On a scale of one to 10, how important do you
think communication is being a business person,
a leader and or an entrepreneur? Well, you know,
I'm biased. But I'm going to say it's a 10. I'm
going to say it's a 10 because everything you
do is all about communicating. And by the way,
when I say communicating, there's a word that
I want to add to that that I think is important.
And it's a skill set that we don't really learn
in school. And that is listening. So communication
is two way. It's about being able to talk. But
even more so, it's about being a good listener.
And if you're an entrepreneur, I would say if
you had to build any skill set, it would be asking
great questions. being a good listener, because
we are in the problem solving business. If you
don't understand the problem or challenge of
your potential customer, you're not going to
be able to help them. And if you can't help them,
then you're not going to get like good word of
mouth or your business isn't going to grow. Right.
So listening is very, very important. That's
just one piece I wanted to blend in there when
I talk about communication. Absolutely. So when
you when you did discuss the impact, there is
no room for L. So would that be in the active?
active part of it which is right it's active
listening right so the a is active listening
and active engagement and you know listening
is great but active listening is even better
because listening is hearing right listening
is like you know right now you're probably listening
and there's some noise in the background or the
dog's barking you know but when you're really
when you're really actively listening you're
totally focused on the other person you're paying
attention to the non -verbals you're picking
up on subtle cues and of course you're hearing
the words and whenever you feel like there's
a disconnect You're taking your time then to
check back in because it's active listening.
It's not just about sitting there. It's about
sometimes it's about taking notes, sometimes
about politely interrupting when appropriate,
asking deeper questions. So it goes into the
activation step for active listening. What's
your goal for being on this show today? You know,
my point and I've been in business now, let's
be I'll be frank. It's been over two decades.
I mean, I'm at the point where I really love
what I'm doing. But more importantly, now I'm
at the point where I love paying forward. So
my goal today was to give some good ideas, to
give some tips that people can use. I know what
it's like to be an entrepreneur. I've been doing
it for a couple of decades. And I know the first
three to five years are the most difficult. So
if you're a new entrepreneur in those first three
to five years, I'm hoping you've got a couple
of things you can think about today about being
a better listener. And one last thing I'll say
to me is that no matter what you do, there's
one skill set that all entrepreneurs need to
get better at, and that is prospecting and selling.
because we're great at what we do, but if we
don't get someone to pay us, we're not going
to be able to stay in business. So to wrap things
up, I guess, when I think about communicating,
I want you to think about. How are you going
to be able to diagnose before you prescribe?
How are you going to be able to find out what
the needs are of your potential customers? And
then, of course, build deep relationships, go
the extra mile, add tremendous value, and make
sure that people are so excited and happy they
want to tell other people about you. And all
of those things come back to that one word, communication.
Thank you for being here today. I'm really happy
that you tuned in to Vision Pros Live. I'm looking
forward to seeing your reactions as these episodes
continue to move forward. This is going to get
more and more fun. We'll have more and more engagement
as well. We'll invite people to participate in
the show. And thank you for giving us your time
and attention. Have an excellent time building
out your vision and becoming a vision pro yourself.