Tell me about your vision, please. So my vision
is to help destigmatize mental health issues,
but also issues around almost everything in life
that we stigmatize or stereotype and promote
more understanding of each other and, quite frankly,
more love for each other. How I got that was,
is I had a very abusive childhood. And in my
late 30s, I experienced, and I went into a career
in law enforcement and as a volunteer firefighter.
So I eventually experienced what I call an inevitable
mental health crisis. It was coming. My life
had set me up for that. And I realized during
that time. afterwards i guess more that when
i was suicidal and i had been suicidal for a
few months and i was abandoned by all the people
around me in various ways however that shows
up like being too scared to ask me not recognizing
the signs whatever it might have been and i realized
that i had almost died because i was too scared
to ask for help because of the stigma around
mental health And that is incredibly ridiculous
because I found out later in my healing journey
that we all experience mental health at some
degree eventually in our lifetimes. And so why
would I die from something that stupid? And when
people die in ridiculous ways, like the Tide
Pod Challenge, we all find out about it immediately
and be like, Be aware of this, right? Or engineering
safeguards come into play and we prevent that.
And so people are dying needlessly. It's completely
ridiculous. And in 19 years in my career, I worked
with six guys, men, all high achievers until
they weren't. And then they died from suicide.
And, you know, some of them were really good
friends of mine. So that is that stigma part
of it. for mental health specifically. But then,
you know, as I kind of was on my journey and
I started thinking about this a lot more, I realized
something else. And that is, is I'm a white farm
boy. And even though I had a lot of trauma in
my life, I was only stigmatized for a couple
of years. And a lot of people wake up in the
morning. And walk out of their house and are
stigmatized or stereotyped immediately. And that
happens their whole life. And it's not right.
And we're doing so much damage to each other
just by not, you know, refusing to understand
what someone else might be going through. And
then perpetrating stereotypes. And I've been
guilty of that myself. But once I realized, you
know, how harmful that is, I've always been interested
in people's story. And I've always been accepting
of other people, even when it's uncomfortable
for me, because sometimes you're in situations
where like, whoa, like, I do not understand this.
And it's uncomfortable. But when you get to know
people, and you hear their story. even if you
don't agree with what they're doing or their
opinions you can have more you know understanding
and empathy and there's more love in the world
and there's just a whole lot more i guess cooperation
with each other and but yeah so that's kind of
my vision is to just and i know it's a huge one
it's a big task but you know just chip away at
it every day a little bit Like, where are you
going with your vision? You can talk about your
business and what you're doing there. So it started
with just making posts on social media. And then
that's when I really realized how many people
are struggling in silence because I would get
messages from people that wouldn't like. or comment
on what I'd posted, but a private message telling
me how much it had helped them or asking for
advice or asking for help in some way. And so
I started doing that. I've started public speaking.
I tell my story to people. I give them hope and
I show them because I was at rock bottom. And
when I told the person closest to me that I was
suicidal, they literally walked out of the room
on me. so literal physical abandonment again
which triggered a lot of childhood stuff but
so i've started public speaking because i've
i've realized that it helps a lot of people just
hearing my story i recently started a podcast
called true emotion dad where i talk about the
hard stuff and i i don't hide from anything and
i don't mask anything because i want people to
hear the truth because There are other people
out there that are suffering at that level. And
if I only tell a superficial version of my story,
it's not going to help them. And so that's why
I bare my soul when I tell my story is because
I want people to know that they're not alone
in their struggle. So I'm doing the podcast.
Just started that. It's a lot of fun. I get to
meet some amazing people. And I'm working on
a clothing line that spreads the message of hope
and love for everyone. Even, you know, we don't
have to agree with anybody. But if you can love
them at just some kind of level and promote that
understanding of where they're coming from, then
we help the world, I believe. Yeah, I think you're
right. That's amazing. How long has this been,
like, how has your business, you know? how has
it gone so far how did you get i'm just put how
did you get started but uh like kind of looking
at that how's it going well um a lot of learning
lessons along the way which some people might
call failures but it's just the first attempt
in learning and i started one previously i closed
it realized a lot of the lessons I needed to
learn there. And some of them were personal growth.
And I'm just recently revamping up, kind of rebranded,
revamping up now and just, you know, taking my
time. I don't want to rush anything and make
too many big mistakes. That makes sense. And
so how long have you been recording the new podcast?
About just under two months. Oh, wow. That's
brand new then. That's exciting. Oh, yeah. Yeah,
it's new. Yeah. There's a learning curve, right?
Yes, there is. And then the apparel line too.
How long has that been going? This new one about
the same time because I started getting the inspiration
around the same time. And I had taken a break
just to kind of work on myself a little bit.
Or actually quite a bit, actually, not just a
little bit. There was a lot of work there. Yeah,
I was going to say, that's not usually a dip
in the tip. Yeah, let's talk about the whole
iceberg here. Yeah, so like most recently, it's
been about, you know, two months. I think I first,
I've been working like at it in some way, probably
for three, three and a half years, you know,
just tinkering with stuff and ideas. whatever
what would you say success is going to look like
you know particularly in relation to this business
how can you define that that's a hard question
because when you first ask me about success i
think of being a good dad and a good person and
you know living health and you know being healthy
there's a hundred levels of success for me in
this. And, you know, I've already achieved success
because I've had people email me and tell them
how much an episode helped them on my podcast
or how much, you know, one little thing I said
had changed their perspective and helped them
see a bigger picture. So that's success for me.
I guess, maturely, I don't know, 20 employees,
full -time employees. And that's kind of the
twist to my dream, though, is I'm not, like,
I want to build, and I'm going to build a big,
successful company. But it's not going to necessarily
be successful on paper, because if I'm making
a difference in the world, by you know selling
items that promote love and understanding and
you know all the happy stuff then I have to start
at home too and and by that I mean is my employees
are going to be taken care of very well right
and you know I don't know exactly how that looks
yet but it's going to obviously minimize some
profits but that's that's okay for me because
I want people to join or have the same vision
as I do. And I don't want to be a millionaire
with employees that are working at minimum wage
and poor benefits. That's not going to be how
that looks, right? That makes a lot of sense.
A true win is a win for everybody involved. Absolutely.
I agree. That's so good. That's so important
that you see that already, even just a few months
in on this go. How will being on this show, like
how does that fit into your goals, your strategies?
It helps spread the message of what I'm doing
and whether it inspires someone else to do the
same thing as me or inspires somebody else to
come listen to my podcast. For me, it's about
just spreading, spreading the message of hope
and love. And, you know, trying to understand
people better. And for those that are suffering
that it's you're not alone and you'll be OK.
That's huge. That's so good. How old are your
kids? They're eight and eight and ten. Oh, that's
so good. They're fun ages. Yeah, that is that
is fun. Mine are grown. So I'm like, oh, I remember.
As a dad and then also as a business person,
how would you define what makes a great leader?
Someone that understands their people. Someone
that can connect with them on a deep level. And
someone who is trusted and can give trust. When
I think of my children, my, I guess, primary
goal with them is to build a really strong connection.
And so I have to put a lot of my ideas away sometimes
and just to connect with them on their level.
And as a leader in a workplace or of a group
of people, they have to trust you. And so, therefore,
you have to be trustworthy and you have to be
able to be vulnerable with them. Because when
you're vulnerable, you show your true self and
then you become trustworthy. And looking back
over my career, specifically in law enforcement,
I don't think I ever once had a so -called leader
that was vulnerable. And I didn't trust my leaders.
Yeah, that makes a lot of sense. What would you
say about this? Like, you know, with your vision,
you know, you're kind of beginning steps, you
know, like two months in, that's fantastic. You've
got a lot going on already, which is exciting.
How do you feel about like where you are with
your vision? I think my vision is pretty clear.
i've i've been doing some form of it for several
years whether it's just you know my facebook
or social media posts just talking about um mental
health positivity in some degree i i don't want
to get into toxic positivity um but yeah i feel
good if i were to say where i was with my vision
i think the vision itself is pretty It's just
reaching the goals in that vision. So it's hard
for me to kind of explain that. Yeah, I get you.
I think that's it. You know, when you're venturing
into something that's not mapped out, it's kind
of hard to tell where you are, how much further
you have and all of that. And if there's one
thing that I've learned in the last. few years
is to not be too rigid in my thinking and kind
of go with the flow a little more and be adaptable.
And so I'm always just kind of like, this is
what I think it is, but I might be throwing a
twist. So it might change. Yeah. That seems pretty
normal with entrepreneurs. Yeah, definitely.
And do you have a team that works with you or
just all by yourself? It's me solo right now.
Just taking it step by step. And I've had some
friends and acquaintances that at varying stages
have been able to offer me some advice that has
been really helpful. So, yeah. That's great.
And then how about for, you know, do you have
like, are you funding this yourself? Are you
bootstrapping? Do you have something else going
on that funds it? I'm funding it myself. My first
endeavor I funded. um by working having another
contracting business but that was just too too
much i i did i couldn't i couldn't maintain it
and so um i'm just funding it uh by myself right
now and just taking it slow because last time
i kind of rushed through it and i learned a lot
of costly lessons share some of those I would
love to hear like the like the top two that you're
like oh boy yes definitely do this um I was well
one of them is I spent over four thousand dollars
to um get designed boxes and I can't remember
how many I bought and it was I was I was Well,
the biggest mistake or lesson that I learned
was I was very ego driven. Right. And that blinded
some of my better judgment. And and so, yeah,
like I spent four thousand dollars and I think
it was just over a thousand boxes with a logo
on them. And I might have used two of them. And
so that was a very unwise decision. And my intuition
was telling me differently, but I overrode it.
And so it was very ego -driven back then, and
I'm much more malleable now. Yeah, that's interesting.
Do you have another? Well, I didn't do enough
marketing and I thought it was going to take
off. I didn't understand a lot. And it comes
back to my ego, though. I thought, oh, this is
just going to take off. Like, how can anybody
not like this? Right. I didn't I missed steps.
I missed like, you know, testing or checking
to see if there was a market for that or I was.
And so that whole kind of ego thing. my better
judgment and I spent a lot more money than I
needed to. How are you going to, you know, do
you know how to do marketing? Are you going to
just figure it out on the fly? No, when I feel
ready, like when I feel that I have like the
pieces in place, I do plan on getting some professional
advice on how to grow and what areas, you know,
to focus on and how to grow. where to go with
it yeah and what pieces are these like what pieces
do you feel like you need to get in place um
i'm still finalizing some of my my clothing line
and just making sure that there's something there
for everybody some merch finalizing my processes
that i'm going to use to to ensure quality you
know affordability profitability those kind of
things and you know if I want to be prepared
for best -case scenario if it happens or you
know when it eventually happens I guess and do
the proper planning and and just make sure I've
got everything figured out what do you what do
you feel like you're exploring next as far as
the next building block in your business hmm
well this morning I spent several hours looking
at wholesalers and just the the process of getting
logos pressed onto to clothing I do I am exploring
more female apparel and I am I do have a really
good friend that's going to be helping with me
helping me with that because i do not understand
women's fashion probably probably a good thing
that i don't i don't know um and so i'm exploring
that and i'm exploring um collaboration opportunities
with like -minded podcasts and like -minded people
just to you know help each other spread the word
about what we're doing Thank you for being here
today. I'm really happy that you tuned in to
Vision Pros Live. I'm looking forward to seeing
your reactions as these episodes continue to
move forward. This is going to get more and more
fun. We'll have more and more engagement as well.
We'll invite people to participate in the show.
Thank you for giving us your time and attention.
Have an excellent time building out your vision
and becoming a vision pro yourself.