1 00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:03,360 Tell me about your vision when you decided to write this book. 2 00:00:04,880 --> 00:00:07,040 I think the vision came from one. 3 00:00:08,720 --> 00:00:14,160 The more I researched, the more the problem was clear that two out of five new CEOs fail 4 00:00:14,160 --> 00:00:17,200 in the first 18 months and just going, that's ridiculous. 5 00:00:17,200 --> 00:00:22,080 And then trying to think about why they fail, talking to more and more CEOs 6 00:00:22,560 --> 00:00:26,960 about their journey and what else they might have happened and getting those stories. 7 00:00:26,960 --> 00:00:31,520 So the vision that sort of resulted from all that was to go, 8 00:00:32,880 --> 00:00:38,320 I mean, I passionately believe that every single first time CEO should be allocated 9 00:00:38,320 --> 00:00:43,600 and independent and has to be independent coach and mentor as a matter of course. 10 00:00:43,600 --> 00:00:44,560 Why wouldn't you? 11 00:00:45,200 --> 00:00:51,280 The paranoid new imposter syndrome filled new CEOs going, everyone wants me to fail. 12 00:00:51,840 --> 00:00:52,960 No, that's not true. 13 00:00:52,960 --> 00:00:55,600 They've hired you because they want you to succeed. 14 00:00:55,600 --> 00:01:00,080 And everyone bar that person on your team who thinks they should have got the job. 15 00:01:00,080 --> 00:01:05,280 Once you and the company succeed, why wouldn't you spend a little, 16 00:01:05,280 --> 00:01:12,000 what's a relatively small amount of money as insurance to give this person the best 17 00:01:12,000 --> 00:01:15,680 support that they can have to be the best they can be? 18 00:01:17,360 --> 00:01:22,960 I just don't understand why there's so much attention on the selection process. 19 00:01:22,960 --> 00:01:26,000 Have we got the right person? Have we not got the right person? 20 00:01:26,000 --> 00:01:32,800 And within that, chances are on the short list, most people could do the job, 21 00:01:32,800 --> 00:01:37,040 have the experience and skills to do the job in some way, shape or form. 22 00:01:38,320 --> 00:01:40,480 But the key question is not, can you do the job? 23 00:01:40,480 --> 00:01:43,280 The key question is, can you be trusted to do the job? 24 00:01:43,280 --> 00:01:51,120 And so that's where I also work with aspiring CEOs to make their own luck to build that trust 25 00:01:51,120 --> 00:01:55,920 in order to be taken. And there's lots of lessons in the book about that. 26 00:01:55,920 --> 00:01:58,080 But it really was to help people. 27 00:01:58,080 --> 00:02:01,840 And I'm not a massive business book fan, to be quite honest. 28 00:02:01,840 --> 00:02:08,400 I worked in publishing for 20 years and I love reading literary fiction. 29 00:02:08,400 --> 00:02:12,640 And actually, I think you can understand a hell of a lot about relationships 30 00:02:12,640 --> 00:02:14,240 from reading great fiction. 31 00:02:14,240 --> 00:02:21,520 And so I wanted to write a book that was accessible for people like myself, 32 00:02:21,520 --> 00:02:26,400 who said they're going, I don't want to read about a theory and bullet points and yes, no, whatever. 33 00:02:26,400 --> 00:02:31,040 Because it's about emotions with a fiction. 34 00:02:31,040 --> 00:02:34,560 You don't remember the facts, you remember how it made you feel. 35 00:02:34,560 --> 00:02:40,000 And that's what I wanted to write, that sort of book, which was about stories, 36 00:02:40,000 --> 00:02:46,800 about anecdotes, about practical things that happen in the real world that you can grab hold of. 37 00:02:46,800 --> 00:02:53,760 And one of the things it's worth saying, if I've got time, when I'm coaching with CEOs 38 00:02:53,760 --> 00:02:57,920 and you're moving away from the coaching style of going, what else might you do? 39 00:02:57,920 --> 00:02:59,360 What else? What else? 40 00:02:59,360 --> 00:03:04,320 And they're going, look, I pay you the other money and I've got five minutes, I'm busy, help. 41 00:03:04,320 --> 00:03:10,240 And what I've found, and it's the sort of changing of the framework. 42 00:03:10,240 --> 00:03:15,760 But if you sit there and say, OK, here's something that happened to me that has some similarities. 43 00:03:15,760 --> 00:03:17,280 Bear me out. 44 00:03:17,280 --> 00:03:21,360 And you start talking about something, it doesn't really matter what it is. 45 00:03:21,360 --> 00:03:25,600 But within three minutes, they'll go, hang on, stop, stop, stop. 46 00:03:25,600 --> 00:03:30,240 Something you just said triggered the answer of what I need to do. 47 00:03:30,240 --> 00:03:34,400 And it happens so frequently, it's not a coincidence. 48 00:03:34,400 --> 00:03:39,840 And to me, it's because you've talked about their problems, they're surrounded by their problems. 49 00:03:39,840 --> 00:03:45,840 And it's much easier to solve someone else's problem and see the answer for them than it is to see the answer to your own problem. 50 00:03:45,840 --> 00:03:52,960 But then as soon as I start talking about a problem I had, they go into problem solving mode and they go, right, OK, I can solve your problem. 51 00:03:52,960 --> 00:03:58,960 And then because they're surrounded still with their own issues, that connection, that lightning sort of thing, 52 00:03:58,960 --> 00:04:05,040 that lightning strikes and suddenly they're in problem solving mode, they can see their own answers. 53 00:04:05,040 --> 00:04:07,120 And it's so powerful. 54 00:04:07,120 --> 00:04:09,200 It really is a magic moment. 55 00:04:09,200 --> 00:04:14,480 The first time it happened, I was sitting there going, wow, I was as surprised as anyone else. 56 00:04:14,480 --> 00:04:15,760 But it happens all the time now. 57 00:04:15,760 --> 00:04:21,920 And that's where that gray area is so magical. 58 00:04:21,920 --> 00:04:28,000 And if you can't see an answer to your problem, if someone can fix it like that, it is like a miracle. 59 00:04:28,000 --> 00:04:32,160 And that's where you get that conversion. 60 00:04:32,160 --> 00:04:38,720 And some people sit there going, right, that's why I need coaching. 61 00:04:38,720 --> 00:04:40,560 That's why I need mentoring. 62 00:04:40,560 --> 00:04:47,440 It's that independence to be able to have the freedom to ask the daft questions and confess the darkest thoughts. 63 00:04:47,440 --> 00:04:53,200 And that's what's so valuable. 64 00:04:53,200 --> 00:04:59,040 I can definitely understand that because the aha moments, especially when it comes from them, 65 00:04:59,040 --> 00:05:05,600 it's like, oh, I really, you know, it's not about, of course, us, but it's like I did the job and they figured it out. 66 00:05:05,600 --> 00:05:08,240 But sometimes you just have to hear yourself talk. 67 00:05:08,240 --> 00:05:21,280 As you work with these CEOs or the ones who aspire to be, what are some of the biggest challenges you see the leaders face or seeing some of the CEOs facing? 68 00:05:21,280 --> 00:05:24,800 That's a really good question. 69 00:05:24,800 --> 00:05:28,000 To me, they are. 70 00:05:28,000 --> 00:05:31,280 The vast majority of them are relationship based. 71 00:05:31,280 --> 00:05:35,120 I've got a boss or someone on the board who I just don't see eye to eye with. 72 00:05:35,120 --> 00:05:44,000 We meet and then you get this sphere, you know, get you can talk to someone and go, I dread going into those meetings with my boss. 73 00:05:44,000 --> 00:05:46,240 I absolutely dread it, dread it, dread it. 74 00:05:46,240 --> 00:05:51,440 But then five minutes later, you're talking to them, say, tell me about someone who you really rate that you've worked with. 75 00:05:51,440 --> 00:05:54,880 They go, I've never worked for anyone who I haven't overtaken in three months. 76 00:05:54,880 --> 00:05:58,400 And you can. Wow. You've got massive fear. 77 00:05:58,400 --> 00:06:04,000 Five minutes later, you're the best thing since sliced bread and and it's extraordinary. 78 00:06:04,000 --> 00:06:10,000 So but but it but it tends to be about relationships because a team might make something work. 79 00:06:10,000 --> 00:06:18,480 If you've got a problem that's technical, you still need relationships in order to build the team that's going to fix it. 80 00:06:18,480 --> 00:06:24,080 And so so but relationships are so different. 81 00:06:24,080 --> 00:06:33,440 I think, you know, when I was working at working in retail a million years ago and it was old school and it was we stamp with J.F.D.I. 82 00:06:33,440 --> 00:06:40,560 just do it and people didn't have rationale or reasoning as to why things need to be done. 83 00:06:40,560 --> 00:06:52,400 This need to be done. And that whole way of thinking is it's sort of I don't know. 84 00:06:52,400 --> 00:06:55,760 It there's not a place for it anymore. 85 00:06:55,760 --> 00:06:59,040 You know, it doesn't get it doesn't get the best out of people. 86 00:06:59,040 --> 00:07:02,160 And it actually sets people up, sets people up the wrong way. 87 00:07:02,160 --> 00:07:07,120 So I'm not quite sure where I'm going with this. 88 00:07:07,120 --> 00:07:16,480 But that that relationships issue of understanding that that cracking the whip harder is not necessarily the answer. 89 00:07:16,480 --> 00:07:20,000 You know, you're in charge of sales sales are down this month. 90 00:07:20,000 --> 00:07:24,240 What are you doing about it? You know, crack the whip harder. 91 00:07:24,240 --> 00:07:30,960 You know, are you the sort of person that that that sales manager can say? 92 00:07:30,960 --> 00:07:36,720 I'm glad I had the opportunity to talk to you because did you know my father has just been diagnosed with Parkinson's disease? 93 00:07:36,720 --> 00:07:41,360 Exactly. And I'm now I'm now as of this week, primary caregiver. 94 00:07:41,360 --> 00:07:47,200 You know, there's a sort of conversations you would never have had in a million years back in the day with those bosses. 95 00:07:47,200 --> 00:07:52,640 But are you the sort of boss that actually people feel I can have that conversation? 96 00:07:52,640 --> 00:07:59,760 Yeah, yeah. And you're right. Relationships are so important, so important. 97 00:07:59,760 --> 00:08:02,400 So so but there's no right or wrong answer. 98 00:08:02,400 --> 00:08:07,440 Yeah. In that example, the person you're speaking to might totally agree with you one week. 99 00:08:07,440 --> 00:08:09,280 You may have the same conversation the next week. 100 00:08:09,280 --> 00:08:13,680 It's a completely different answer. You know, got out of the different side of the bed. 101 00:08:13,680 --> 00:08:20,800 Yes, yes. So before we go, I'd love to ask this one question because we did not dive into the book, 102 00:08:20,800 --> 00:08:24,480 but I would love to bring you on to dive further into the book. 103 00:08:24,480 --> 00:08:32,160 But knowing that that book has been written and it's been out since March, almost a year now for a first time CEO, 104 00:08:32,160 --> 00:08:35,920 if they could read your book, which chapter would you tell them to start with? 105 00:08:40,800 --> 00:08:45,520 The I start with the introduction because it sets out what the books tries to achieve. 106 00:08:45,520 --> 00:08:53,120 And then there's a sort of model in the book which which looks at the relationships internally within the company up and down 107 00:08:53,120 --> 00:09:04,640 and across the wider company, but then also externally with suppliers, with partners, with media. 108 00:09:04,640 --> 00:09:13,200 And it's really you might you might fight, say you might find the area which says, hang on, the that's me. 109 00:09:13,200 --> 00:09:15,040 Or that's the area I've got an issue with. 110 00:09:15,040 --> 00:09:17,440 Because it's in three parts, the external, the internal. 111 00:09:17,440 --> 00:09:20,560 And then the first part and most important part is about you. 112 00:09:20,560 --> 00:09:27,840 And I guess that's the really interesting one, because it it sets you on the on the journey of going, 113 00:09:27,840 --> 00:09:30,800 yeah, I get all that. I've been through that. 114 00:09:30,800 --> 00:09:34,640 Or wow, my God, there's a long way to go. 115 00:09:34,640 --> 00:09:39,040 So so you is the most always the most important in any relationship. 116 00:09:39,040 --> 00:09:44,240 You are the one consistent person who's always involved in that relationship. 117 00:09:44,240 --> 00:09:46,880 Absolutely. Well, you guys heard it. 118 00:09:46,880 --> 00:09:56,480 You start with the introduction and then focus on you. With that being said, David, please share with them where they could either set up a coaching session with you. 119 00:09:56,480 --> 00:10:03,360 So your website, your social media handles and where they can purchase your book at. 120 00:10:03,360 --> 00:10:09,760 OK, so the website is www.GreyAreaCoaching.com. 121 00:10:09,760 --> 00:10:15,600 But as I said, it's G-R-E-Y AreaCoaching.com. 122 00:10:15,600 --> 00:10:37,600 And on that, there's a whole lot of stuff about me, my career, my from when I did my psychology degree back in the 13th century to to what I'm actually doing now and and and my my process and style of coaching and mentoring. 123 00:10:37,600 --> 00:10:51,120 But also within there's a tab Media News where there's a lot of interviews, podcasts, appearances or whatever, and you'll be able to see what I'm like, hopefully a little bit, because it's all that's so important. 124 00:10:51,120 --> 00:10:54,080 You know, and not everybody's for everybody. 125 00:10:54,080 --> 00:10:57,480 And some people say not my cup of tea and other people going, that's really interesting. 126 00:10:57,480 --> 00:11:01,680 I like the way he approaches that. So so it's horses for courses. 127 00:11:01,680 --> 00:11:07,240 So great for that website and a lot of testimonials from people I've coached. 128 00:11:07,240 --> 00:11:09,440 So there's loads of information on that site. 129 00:11:09,440 --> 00:11:20,040 The book is available on Amazon, whether Barnes and Noble is stocking it or whatever, I don't know. 130 00:11:20,040 --> 00:11:27,600 But the but it's on Amazon dot com and it's available as an e-book, a paperback and an audio book. 131 00:11:27,600 --> 00:11:30,080 I read the audio book. Thank you for being here today. 132 00:11:30,080 --> 00:11:32,560 I'm really happy that you tuned in to Vision Pros Live. 133 00:11:32,560 --> 00:11:37,480 I'm looking forward to seeing your reactions as these episodes continue to move forward. 134 00:11:37,480 --> 00:11:39,200 This is going to get more and more fun. 135 00:11:39,200 --> 00:11:43,120 We'll have more and more engagement as well when by people to participate in the show. 136 00:11:43,120 --> 00:11:45,480 And thank you for giving us your time and attention. 137 00:11:45,480 --> 00:12:03,680 Have an excellent time building out your vision and becoming a vision for yourself.