What tips would you have for leaders?
So leadership is really complex and there it's very multifaceted and every level of leadership, you actually have to learn new skills, new behaviors and spend your time on different things.
And so what I've done is I've broken down leadership into three pillars of leadership success.
So the first tip I have for leaders is that first leadership pillars, know yourself.
The second one is manage your team and the third one is lead your business.
So tip for that first pillar of know yourself, understand your strengths and weaknesses and then hire people on your team to close the gaps.
You can't develop all your weaknesses.
So hire really smart people who have a strength which closes the gap on your weakness.
A tip for that second pillar of manage your team is around feedback.
So you have to give both positive and constructive feedback.
So positive feedback is to reinforce the behavior you want to see again.
So positive feedback is not, oh, you did a great job today. Thank you. Thank you.
Positive feedback is when someone goes the extra mile, give them feedback.
Recognize that they've gone the extra mile and constructive feedback you have to give away.
You have to give right away.
For constructive feedback, most leaders avoid it because they don't know how to give it.
And so a tip I have is really learn how to give constructive feedback.
That's something that I teach the leaders that I work with all the time how to do.
There's a process to give constructive feedback and it's not something you should be afraid of.
It's not based on personality.
It's based on specific behaviors that you see the person doing that they need to change.
And so typically that person has a blind spot around those behaviors.
They don't know that they're doing something that needs to be fixed.
So if you avoid giving them feedback, they're never going to be able to fix that behavior.
Yes. And then if things get too hard of a hand and some things goes beyond your control,
then it's a fire or not situation which you don't want to deal with.
It's easier to fix it earlier in the stages than it is to later in the stages
when things have been already cemented in place.
That's a great point. And I would say the same for conflict.
If you don't address a conflict situation right away, it's just going to get worse.
It's just going to expand. And so you're so right.
And with both conflict and feedback, they need to be addressed right away.
Correct. My next thing for you, Vanessa, I think it's a it's a hard question
and you can take time to think about it if you like.
What is your most significant learning experience when it comes to leadership?
So my most significant learning experience when it comes to leaders is having a really bad leader myself.
So I worked in an organization where I worked there for five years.
I had a wonderful leader and a new person got brought into the organization.
She was an external hire and she was not a good cultural fit.
And unfortunately, she was awful. She was very controlling, very power hungry.
She took away all my responsibilities. She yelled at me in front of people.
She was quite a bully, to be honest.
And I know anyone who's had that experience knows that it's it's really a soul sucking experience.
And so why that was so important for me is I'd never had a really bad leader before.
I mean, I had leaders who had issues, but I really never had a leader before that was such a bully.
And what I learned as a leadership consultant coach is how important leadership is,
that as a leader, you actually make or break people's experience at work.
And that experience personally of having a soul sucking leader really solidified my passion
for the work that I do as a leadership consultant and coach, because I realized how important leaders are.
You set the tone for your team and you literally make or break people's experience at work.
Yeah. So tell me more about that. How did that situation turn out after that?
So basically, it turned out terribly. To be really honest, I had to leave the organization.
And so I did. And it took me two or three months just to what I call defrost,
because it was such a challenging experience for me.
And when I speak to leaders or people, individuals who are going through an experience like that right now,
I always explain to them what defrosting means, right?
Because when you've gone through a soul sucking experience like that,
it's it's really detrimental to your mental health and well-being.
And I actually became like depressed. I'm a very upbeat person.
But the thought of going into work every day and working for this terrible leader just was so bad for my mental health.
So it took me some time to really defrost and gain my strength back and gain my confidence back.
And so I always say to people, like, give yourself time to to get healthy again.
And think of what you learned from that experience.
And what I learned is I never want to be that kind of leader and that I'm passionate
to the work that I do in facilitating leadership program and development for other people
so that under my watch, no leaders are going to be that kind of a horrendous boss.
Yeah. Thank you for sharing that.
There's two sides to the situation, though.
And I think I want to talk about the other side now.
There is the employee side and the employer's side.
We talked about how being a better leader can avoid those situations.
But what tips would you have for employees in that situation?
Well, for sure.
I mean, I was the employee in that situation.
Do you mean for the business or do you mean for the person going through it or for the leader?
The person going through it, yes.
The person going through it. So I was the person going through it.
And so I think that you have to always do what's best for you.
And you are the CEO of your own organization.
You are in control of your own career.
And if that person's not leaving, you need to leave.
I was recently speaking to somebody who was in a fairly senior position at GE, General Electric,
and he was leading quite a big, big team and he had a terrible, terrible boss.
And the question I said to him is, is this boss of yours ever going to leave?
Do you see him moving to another organization?
Do you see him moving to another department?
Do you see him retiring soon?
And he said, no.
I said, well, so you have two choices.
You either stay and you tolerate this terrible leader or you move you move departments and jobs yourself.
Like those are your two choices.
And so he decided to leave and he's so much happier now.
He's still within the organization, but he's moved to a different department.
He loves his leader.
And so you have to take charge.
Like, don't stay in a situation that's detrimental to your own physical and mental health.
I recall a time where I was living on the East Coast in Virginia and I had a similar situation where
maybe I was at a fault too, or maybe my boss, but the environment that was created, it wasn't healthy.
And I felt like that the people, their goal was to secure their job instead of progressing the
company as a whole.
And that sucked the life out of me.
Like I would I would go and go work.
I'm like, I was like every time I would go, my goal would be like, hey, I want to do these tasks.
So then in the future, this can be automated and I can move on to something better and I can do something better.
But I think that was not the mentality for my leaders at that time.
They wanted to stay there and not be replaced.
And I would go there and that would suck the life out of me and I would not be happy.
I would just and that affects to a great extent.
And there's a lot of parts to it.
So I've been there.
I've been there to understand what people can go through and I understand what you went through.
It's amazing how many people have been in that situation before.
It really is.
Yeah, it's how we got to have better leaders.
We got to have and employees will need to do right for them as well.
Most people don't have the courage to actually take it and take a stand.
They have to choose between paying the bills next month or their mental health.
And most people choose wrong most times.
Oh, for sure. And, you know, the problem is in most organizations is that leaders are promoted without training or education.
Really?
Oh, yeah, many, many times they're like, oh, you're good.
Let's take, for example, an engineer.
You're really good at your job as an engineer.
Now you're going to lead an engineering team.
Guess what? It's a different job.
It's a different job.
So when you promote someone, when organizations promote someone into a leadership role, they have to train them how to do that.
How do you coach? How do you give feedback?
How do you delegate? How do you hold people accountable?
Right. All of those are are very critical parts of leadership.
But many people are promoted into leadership roles without any coaching or training on how to do those things.
Thank you for being here today.
I'm really happy that you tuned in to Vision Pros Live.
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