Confidence versus self-worth.
Could you jump into the differences between the two
that you see?
Yeah.
So confidence is where you're not sure if you can do
something.
Any time that we try to do something new,
it's going to feel kind of clunky and messy and awkward.
But we push through that, especially when we're kids.
So one of the analogies that I like to use is,
so I have lived in Southern California all my life.
Well, when we were kids, we would skateboard in the street.
And when you first start skateboarding, you fall.
We would fall and go, oh my gosh, I ate it.
And we would laugh at our friends and go, oh, you ate it.
But what did we do?
We got back on our skateboards, and we
kept playing in the street.
And we kept doing it and everything.
And really, nobody seemed to be afraid to fall
in front of our friends.
Well, I don't know what happens, but somehow we grow up,
and all of a sudden, we're afraid to eat it
and to fall in front of our friends and our peer group.
Sometimes, even those things can start
triggering this weird self-worth of,
we'll use the proverbial skateboard.
I don't deserve a nice skateboard.
I don't deserve to know how to ride.
Just these weird stories we get in our head.
And we're growing up, and all of a sudden,
we're thinking that we don't deserve to be loved,
or we don't deserve to be happy, or we don't deserve success.
That's rooted in self-worth.
And a lot of times, that comes because of the stories
in our head of people telling us that we're no good,
we're worthless, you'll never learn how to skateboard,
why do you even try?
It's just like a whole vicious cycle that goes on in our head,
and we have to squash those voices.
Interesting.
Yeah.
I've always tied the two together.
I guess in my history, I've always
tied the two together because they're so closely related.
But talking with you now, I'm realizing
I don't have a self-worth issue.
I've always been very positive and always get back up
and try again.
But I do find myself occasionally having
the confidence issue where I get up and I'm like,
yeah, I'll try again, but I don't think it's going to work.
I'll try again, but it feels like I'm not getting anywhere.
I'm going to keep trying until I feel like I need to stop
or go somewhere else.
But I will keep trying.
And I think that's just the positive side of me.
And that came from my upbringing.
My mother was always positive and always smiling
and always happy whenever it came to anything down.
And there was never, I mean, occasionally there
were sad times, but there was always an upside to everything.
And that's something that I carry with me day to day
is that there's always a positive.
There's always a greener pasture.
There's always a sunnier day.
And you just keep moving forward for it.
Yeah.
And that goes a long way.
It's really cool that you're wired that way.
You said something before we started recording.
You were telling me about post-production editing
and stuff like that.
I mean, just think about the skills
you had to develop just to have your show.
It's a lot.
There's a lot of tech involved.
And you've got all the bells and whistles
to put together a really high quality production piece.
There's a lot of people that will start doing that.
And they will give up because it's a challenge.
And they get that narrative.
Oh, I'll never do this.
I'll never succeed.
And then it goes into, well, who wants to hear my show anyway?
And all the negativity starts spinning around.
And it's like you have to stop that and just say,
is this true?
Is this really even true?
I mean, for people listening, look back at your life
at things that you've accomplished.
I can't cook.
So somebody else might be like, oh, I cook.
It's no big deal.
Well, to somebody that can't cook, it is a big deal.
So first off, don't discount the things that you're good at.
And then look at how it took you so long to even perfect
your favorite recipe.
Every time there's a potluck or you have company over,
people are like, oh, are you going to make that one thing?
That's our favorite.
And you're like, oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.
And you think it's no big deal.
But if I was going to start out, my kitchen
would look like it had exploded.
Every dish, all the ingredients would be out.
It'd be just this giant mess.
There'd probably be food on the floor.
I'd be calling my cat to eat it.
So you don't want to discount what you're good at
and then think like, OK, the principles
that I applied to learn how to skateboard or create
this great dish, how can I apply that to this situation?
Because I think as humans, we totally overcomplicate things.
And we need to stop doing that.
We just need to stop.