1 00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:02,560 Lighthouse. It is, yeah. 2 00:00:03,720 --> 00:00:04,920 It's pen drawing. 3 00:00:06,240 --> 00:00:07,920 That's awesome. I'm a big fan. 4 00:00:07,920 --> 00:00:11,520 The symbolism of lighthouses, that's kind of my goal as a leader 5 00:00:11,520 --> 00:00:13,720 is to be a lighthouse for others. 6 00:00:13,720 --> 00:00:16,160 Yeah, I like that, too. 7 00:00:16,160 --> 00:00:17,160 Definitely. 8 00:00:17,160 --> 00:00:21,200 So as we get ready to talk about the hidden relationship between peace, 9 00:00:21,200 --> 00:00:23,560 happiness and of all things, suffering, 10 00:00:23,560 --> 00:00:29,160 right, and drawing certain perspectives for people, 11 00:00:30,560 --> 00:00:35,760 what three resources, books come to mind 12 00:00:36,600 --> 00:00:40,000 to help entrepreneurs or visionary leaders 13 00:00:40,920 --> 00:00:42,800 move their visions forward? 14 00:00:43,920 --> 00:00:47,640 So I'm going to take a unique approach to this question 15 00:00:47,640 --> 00:00:52,160 in that there's a singular person over the years 16 00:00:52,160 --> 00:00:59,040 who has been of significant influence to me in doing this work. 17 00:01:00,080 --> 00:01:03,560 And so I'm going to give a shout out to him. 18 00:01:03,560 --> 00:01:05,360 His name is Rupert Spiral. 19 00:01:06,520 --> 00:01:11,160 And he is a speaker of all things very similar to me. 20 00:01:12,920 --> 00:01:16,720 His focus is on something called non-duality, 21 00:01:16,720 --> 00:01:22,440 which is a perspective of the world, reality, ourselves 22 00:01:22,440 --> 00:01:25,280 that focuses on the relationships 23 00:01:25,280 --> 00:01:29,040 and kind of the correlations between the distinctions that we see. 24 00:01:29,960 --> 00:01:36,120 And so I think it gives a really beautiful way 25 00:01:36,120 --> 00:01:39,400 of exploring kind of the big picture of things 26 00:01:40,600 --> 00:01:42,800 in a very practical way. 27 00:01:42,800 --> 00:01:48,040 And so I would suggest anyone, anyone that qualifies themselves 28 00:01:48,040 --> 00:01:52,840 as a visionary or a business leader or someone that is unhappy 29 00:01:52,840 --> 00:01:58,400 or looking for happiness to explore what he has to say. 30 00:01:59,680 --> 00:02:04,520 Because a lot of what I have to say is certainly inspired by him 31 00:02:04,520 --> 00:02:07,680 and other people, but I think he does a really great job 32 00:02:07,680 --> 00:02:13,280 of clearly, concisely, practically talking about these things. 33 00:02:13,280 --> 00:02:14,280 Yeah, exactly. 34 00:02:15,120 --> 00:02:17,600 So he's got several books out, 35 00:02:19,360 --> 00:02:22,240 does a lot of in-person stuff 36 00:02:22,240 --> 00:02:26,840 and thousands of hours of video content on YouTube. 37 00:02:28,320 --> 00:02:30,720 And I constantly refer back to that myself. 38 00:02:32,800 --> 00:02:33,800 That's awesome. 39 00:02:33,800 --> 00:02:39,600 You have two others you want to share? 40 00:02:39,600 --> 00:02:40,600 I really don't. 41 00:02:40,600 --> 00:02:43,840 It like, it came down to him. 42 00:02:43,840 --> 00:02:48,600 It was what he said resonated and it was as simple as that. 43 00:02:49,760 --> 00:02:52,200 I love that. I'm totally cool with that. 44 00:02:52,200 --> 00:02:54,880 You'll notice anybody who's watching on the screen 45 00:02:54,880 --> 00:02:58,200 that I opted into Rupert's email, 46 00:02:59,360 --> 00:03:01,800 or rather newsletter sequence. 47 00:03:01,800 --> 00:03:04,320 That is one of my great secrets to success 48 00:03:04,320 --> 00:03:06,840 is when somebody provides me with a resource, 49 00:03:06,840 --> 00:03:08,800 especially one that matters to them, 50 00:03:08,800 --> 00:03:12,880 I often, I go and study that, I put that on my list. 51 00:03:12,880 --> 00:03:15,800 And what happens is, yes, I end up with, 52 00:03:16,800 --> 00:03:20,160 by this point, several thousand newsletters and funnels 53 00:03:20,160 --> 00:03:22,640 that are there, but all of those get filtered as well 54 00:03:22,640 --> 00:03:24,640 to a specific folder. 55 00:03:24,640 --> 00:03:28,440 And then when I do have some time, I can go in and look at them. 56 00:03:28,440 --> 00:03:30,880 Or when I have a team member who needs something specific, 57 00:03:30,880 --> 00:03:33,080 I can remember it. I don't just do it just to do it. 58 00:03:33,080 --> 00:03:36,160 I do it because of a lot of beneficial reasons. 59 00:03:36,160 --> 00:03:40,560 But having access to the sources and knowing who to go back to 60 00:03:40,560 --> 00:03:44,400 and knowing as well, do multiple mentors of mine 61 00:03:45,720 --> 00:03:48,360 mention these individuals, that can be a big thing. 62 00:03:48,360 --> 00:03:51,080 Or the quality of the mentor can also have an effect on that. 63 00:03:51,080 --> 00:03:54,200 So I highly recommend for anybody who's listening in 64 00:03:54,200 --> 00:03:59,280 to consider taking that approach of harboring these resources 65 00:03:59,280 --> 00:04:03,240 just like you would any type of favorite song library 66 00:04:03,240 --> 00:04:05,080 or favorite video library. 67 00:04:05,080 --> 00:04:08,760 That's an awesome opportunity to expand the depth of your wisdom. 68 00:04:08,760 --> 00:04:13,000 So before we dive into your vision and all things about 69 00:04:14,680 --> 00:04:18,640 peace, happiness and suffering as well, we'll take a quick break 70 00:04:18,640 --> 00:04:20,240 and then we'll jump right in. 71 00:04:20,240 --> 00:04:21,480 We'll be back, everybody. 72 00:04:21,480 --> 00:04:24,720 All right. Welcome in to Vision Pros Live. 73 00:04:24,720 --> 00:04:26,760 With Jackson Calame, I'm your show host. 74 00:04:26,760 --> 00:04:29,440 We'll be doing interviews for visionary entrepreneurs 75 00:04:29,440 --> 00:04:32,880 and guest leaders who are building fantastic visions out there. 76 00:04:41,880 --> 00:04:42,760 Hey, what's up, everybody? 77 00:04:42,760 --> 00:04:44,920 Welcome in to another episode of Vision Pros Live. 78 00:04:44,920 --> 00:04:48,320 I'm your show host, Jackson Calame, founder and CEO of First Class Business. 79 00:04:48,800 --> 00:04:52,800 Today, I've got Jarrett Button on the show with me today. 80 00:04:52,800 --> 00:04:56,800 Philosopher, maybe, you know, deep thinker. 81 00:04:56,800 --> 00:05:01,800 Absolutely. Somebody whose demeanor really caught my attention. 82 00:05:01,800 --> 00:05:05,520 And I was like, man, if the world needs more of something, 83 00:05:05,520 --> 00:05:06,920 I think it's this guy. 84 00:05:06,920 --> 00:05:10,520 So I'm excited to interview him, talk to him about peace, happiness 85 00:05:10,520 --> 00:05:13,280 and suffering as well and the connection between the three 86 00:05:13,280 --> 00:05:18,320 and how they ultimately may foster greater happiness together. 87 00:05:18,920 --> 00:05:21,280 So we'll be talking about that from different angles, 88 00:05:21,280 --> 00:05:22,920 both our perspectives. 89 00:05:22,920 --> 00:05:25,960 And in addition to that, I always want to give you some resources 90 00:05:25,960 --> 00:05:29,520 that are super helpful in the case of the sponsorships. 91 00:05:29,520 --> 00:05:31,560 One of them is a paid client. 92 00:05:31,560 --> 00:05:32,920 One of them is not. 93 00:05:32,920 --> 00:05:34,960 Both are equally super valuable to me. 94 00:05:34,960 --> 00:05:37,760 So the first one is Melissa Gray from the Law Spot. 95 00:05:37,760 --> 00:05:39,800 Melissa Gray came on our show, 96 00:05:39,800 --> 00:05:43,040 and I had some trepidation about putting a lawyer on our show. 97 00:05:43,040 --> 00:05:47,880 You know, I know that most lawyers I've met are kind of condescending. 98 00:05:47,880 --> 00:05:48,880 They're rude. 99 00:05:48,880 --> 00:05:51,400 They don't have a lot of time for people. 100 00:05:51,400 --> 00:05:53,800 They don't listen unless they're paid a lot of money. 101 00:05:53,800 --> 00:05:55,480 That's not the case with Melissa. 102 00:05:55,480 --> 00:05:58,480 Melissa believes that law doesn't have to be complicated 103 00:05:58,480 --> 00:06:00,280 and she's here to help protect businesses. 104 00:06:00,280 --> 00:06:02,480 And I know how important it is as a business owner 105 00:06:02,480 --> 00:06:04,480 to be a wise steward of my brand 106 00:06:04,480 --> 00:06:06,680 and anybody else who is thinking about that. 107 00:06:06,680 --> 00:06:09,080 One of the challenges I've seen in most business owners 108 00:06:09,080 --> 00:06:10,480 is they don't do a lot of research 109 00:06:10,480 --> 00:06:12,680 before choosing their legal counsel, 110 00:06:12,680 --> 00:06:15,880 if they even ever choose somebody to be their legal counsel. 111 00:06:15,880 --> 00:06:17,880 And at Restaurant Connect, we suffered from that. 112 00:06:17,880 --> 00:06:19,280 We had a trademark lawsuit. 113 00:06:19,280 --> 00:06:21,680 It cost us $20,000. 114 00:06:21,680 --> 00:06:24,280 We also experienced Apple patenting our software, 115 00:06:24,280 --> 00:06:27,680 and we were kind of victims of the circumstance 116 00:06:27,680 --> 00:06:32,480 by our own lack of diligence in preparing for those scenarios. 117 00:06:32,480 --> 00:06:35,480 So I would recommend that you interview Melissa 118 00:06:35,480 --> 00:06:38,080 in addition to whoever else you might be considering 119 00:06:38,080 --> 00:06:39,680 for your options out there. 120 00:06:39,680 --> 00:06:44,280 And just know that she's got a very strong vote of confidence from me, 121 00:06:44,280 --> 00:06:45,880 whatever that's worth to you. 122 00:06:45,880 --> 00:06:49,280 And then there's Andrew Sosin of Recovery Unplugged. 123 00:06:49,280 --> 00:06:53,480 Recovery Unplugged is an organization that helps with addiction recovery. 124 00:06:53,480 --> 00:06:56,280 And while they focus primarily on helping people 125 00:06:56,280 --> 00:07:02,480 who have what might be considered a severe addiction of drugs and alcohol, 126 00:07:02,480 --> 00:07:08,080 I would say that some of the also equally scary addictions out there 127 00:07:08,080 --> 00:07:11,880 are the ones that rob you of your life very slowly over time. 128 00:07:11,880 --> 00:07:13,880 That could come in the form of apps 129 00:07:13,880 --> 00:07:16,280 that you spend hours on and on for years. 130 00:07:16,280 --> 00:07:18,280 That could come in the form of Netflix 131 00:07:18,280 --> 00:07:20,680 and the form of binge watching YouTube. 132 00:07:20,680 --> 00:07:23,680 There's lots of things that can rob us of living our life 133 00:07:23,680 --> 00:07:25,480 and being present and where we're at 134 00:07:25,480 --> 00:07:27,880 because we're trying to escape some type of emotion. 135 00:07:27,880 --> 00:07:30,480 Now, maybe you're like, man, this doesn't apply to me. 136 00:07:30,480 --> 00:07:32,680 Who in your family might it apply to? 137 00:07:32,680 --> 00:07:36,680 The cool thing about Recovery Unplugged is they've got a 24-7 hotline 138 00:07:36,680 --> 00:07:40,280 where they can also coach you on how to help somebody through this process 139 00:07:40,280 --> 00:07:42,880 and how to get somebody interacting with them 140 00:07:42,880 --> 00:07:45,080 while COVID hurt a lot of businesses. 141 00:07:45,080 --> 00:07:49,080 I think in terms of helping programs like this, rather helping, 142 00:07:49,080 --> 00:07:52,480 I think it did impact in a positive way programs like this 143 00:07:52,480 --> 00:07:56,680 where Andrew had five physical locations but no online support. 144 00:07:56,680 --> 00:07:58,880 They then shifted to an online program. 145 00:07:58,880 --> 00:08:00,680 They have over 400 employees 146 00:08:00,680 --> 00:08:03,480 and they're now able to provide these services virtually 147 00:08:03,480 --> 00:08:05,680 and they incorporate music and what they do too. 148 00:08:05,680 --> 00:08:10,680 And as a musician myself, I'm a big fan of that direction, what they're up to. 149 00:08:10,680 --> 00:08:12,880 I also happen to be a big fan of Tony Robbins 150 00:08:12,880 --> 00:08:16,280 and Andrew's been to that conference 22 years in a row, 151 00:08:16,280 --> 00:08:19,680 which tells me that they probably learned a few things 152 00:08:19,680 --> 00:08:24,080 about that particular methodologies of coaching and moving life forward. 153 00:08:24,080 --> 00:08:28,080 So if you're in line with that and you're in need of a recovery expert, 154 00:08:28,080 --> 00:08:30,480 then I highly recommend checking this program out 155 00:08:30,480 --> 00:08:31,880 and seeing what it's all about. 156 00:08:31,880 --> 00:08:34,280 Couldn't hurt, just give them a call and see. 157 00:08:34,280 --> 00:08:35,880 Then there's the Water Project. 158 00:08:35,880 --> 00:08:38,880 The Water Project is something that, you know, 159 00:08:38,880 --> 00:08:42,680 I always struggle to figure out how I'm going to introduce this, 160 00:08:42,680 --> 00:08:49,280 but the simplicity, the simple reality is I've never had to struggle for water ever. 161 00:08:49,280 --> 00:08:51,480 And there's millions of people out there who do 162 00:08:51,480 --> 00:08:52,880 and I don't ever want to forget that. 163 00:08:52,880 --> 00:08:54,880 So I hope you don't either. 164 00:08:54,880 --> 00:08:58,880 I hope that we can come together and do something to help the Water Project. 165 00:08:58,880 --> 00:09:01,480 If that means giving back to this, that's fantastic. 166 00:09:01,480 --> 00:09:04,480 If you're in a financial position to give five to ten dollars, 167 00:09:04,480 --> 00:09:07,480 the really cool thing about the Water Project is they show you 168 00:09:07,480 --> 00:09:10,280 the outcome of the effort that you support. 169 00:09:10,280 --> 00:09:12,480 So you actually get to choose the community 170 00:09:12,480 --> 00:09:14,280 and you get to see how many people in the community 171 00:09:14,280 --> 00:09:16,280 are going to be affected by your donation. 172 00:09:16,280 --> 00:09:20,080 Once it gets funded, then they do before and after pictures. 173 00:09:20,080 --> 00:09:21,680 You get to hear about the story. 174 00:09:21,680 --> 00:09:24,080 They might build a sand dam. They might build a borehole well. 175 00:09:24,080 --> 00:09:27,280 They might build something else, but they educate you about the process. 176 00:09:27,280 --> 00:09:31,280 And again, you get to see the outcome of the result of having contributed to that community. 177 00:09:31,280 --> 00:09:32,480 And I think that's just amazing. 178 00:09:32,480 --> 00:09:37,080 And I hope that you take the time to ponder and meditate on the generational impact 179 00:09:37,080 --> 00:09:44,280 that it has to provide a source of water to an entire tribe, nation, or city of people, 180 00:09:44,280 --> 00:09:47,880 whatever you want to call it, town. You can use that word too. 181 00:09:47,880 --> 00:09:49,880 If you're not in a position to give back financially, 182 00:09:49,880 --> 00:09:55,480 my request is that you simply share this message with people who maybe are. 183 00:09:55,480 --> 00:09:58,080 And when I say maybe are, try not to judge. 184 00:09:58,080 --> 00:10:00,880 Just share it and allow people to make their own decisions 185 00:10:00,880 --> 00:10:02,480 about whether they want to help or not. 186 00:10:02,480 --> 00:10:07,480 And my other request would be if this isn't the cause that moves you, 187 00:10:07,480 --> 00:10:10,880 share with us the cause that does because we will take a look at that. 188 00:10:10,880 --> 00:10:13,880 And we will take interest in it. We might even put it on the show here. 189 00:10:13,880 --> 00:10:19,080 And again, we never know the ripple effect of our positive or negative actions. 190 00:10:19,080 --> 00:10:21,880 In this case, I would deem this a positive action, 191 00:10:21,880 --> 00:10:25,280 giving back to those who may not be as fortunate as all of us 192 00:10:25,280 --> 00:10:29,280 who get to either rock the mic or listen to a podcast episode. 193 00:10:29,280 --> 00:10:32,680 So without further ado, I'm going to bring Jared Button on. 194 00:10:32,680 --> 00:10:34,880 We're going to be talking about his philosophies, 195 00:10:34,880 --> 00:10:37,880 where they come from, his vision, and we'll go from there. 196 00:10:37,880 --> 00:10:40,880 Jared, thank you for being my guest on Vision Pros Live. 197 00:10:40,880 --> 00:10:42,880 Thank you for having me. 198 00:10:42,880 --> 00:10:48,680 Absolutely. So the Button Coaching and Consulting Firm, 199 00:10:48,680 --> 00:10:51,880 real quick before we dive in, I'd love for you to define for us, 200 00:10:51,880 --> 00:10:54,880 what type of coaching and consulting do you do? 201 00:10:54,880 --> 00:10:58,880 And yeah, let's just start with that for now. 202 00:10:58,880 --> 00:11:04,280 So the focus is really on personal and professional development. 203 00:11:04,280 --> 00:11:08,280 That's kind of the elevator pitch, I guess, if you will. 204 00:11:08,280 --> 00:11:11,880 But it's much more simple than that. 205 00:11:11,880 --> 00:11:15,280 And I don't know if we got into this last time we spoke, Jackson, 206 00:11:15,280 --> 00:11:23,480 but I love asking people the question of what do you want most in life? 207 00:11:23,480 --> 00:11:27,880 So personally for yourself, what do you want most? 208 00:11:27,880 --> 00:11:30,080 And if you can answer that question for me, Jackson, 209 00:11:30,080 --> 00:11:35,880 that would help me to then kind of frame the kind of coaching work, 210 00:11:35,880 --> 00:11:39,080 consulting work that I do. 211 00:11:39,080 --> 00:11:42,280 That's awesome. Did you want me to answer that now? 212 00:11:42,280 --> 00:11:43,480 Yeah, go for it. 213 00:11:43,480 --> 00:11:48,480 Oh, very cool. What do I want most? 214 00:11:48,480 --> 00:11:52,480 Probably time to think about that question. 215 00:11:52,480 --> 00:11:55,480 I'm going to be doing my walk tonight. 216 00:11:55,480 --> 00:11:58,680 As I'm walking, I'm going to think through that thoroughly. 217 00:11:58,680 --> 00:12:00,680 There's no wrong answers here, just what comes to mind. 218 00:12:00,680 --> 00:12:01,880 Oh, yeah. I know. 219 00:12:01,880 --> 00:12:09,080 I think that what I want most is to belong, 220 00:12:09,080 --> 00:12:16,280 you know, and to belong in my God's hands, 221 00:12:16,280 --> 00:12:20,680 you know, to know that I'm secure and safe in that reality 222 00:12:20,680 --> 00:12:26,280 and to learn to just trust in His will, not mine. 223 00:12:26,280 --> 00:12:27,480 I love that. That's beautiful. 224 00:12:27,480 --> 00:12:29,480 That's what I do. 225 00:12:29,480 --> 00:12:33,680 But anytime I get outside of that, life doesn't go as well. 226 00:12:33,680 --> 00:12:37,880 When I stay right there in that, I can be at peace. 227 00:12:37,880 --> 00:12:40,280 That's fantastic. That's a beautiful answer. 228 00:12:40,280 --> 00:12:46,680 And honestly, that answer is, 229 00:12:46,680 --> 00:12:50,080 well, not an answer that is commonly given. 230 00:12:50,080 --> 00:12:51,080 No, it's not. 231 00:12:51,080 --> 00:12:57,280 But it does highlight one point that there's a driving force 232 00:12:57,280 --> 00:13:01,080 of peace and happiness in your life. 233 00:13:01,080 --> 00:13:06,280 There's this pursuit of peace and acceptance and happiness. 234 00:13:06,280 --> 00:13:12,280 And I think that that highlights a common point in people's lives 235 00:13:12,280 --> 00:13:15,680 is that we might want things. 236 00:13:15,680 --> 00:13:17,480 We might want relationships. 237 00:13:17,480 --> 00:13:19,080 We might want states of mind. 238 00:13:19,080 --> 00:13:24,080 We might want personal, professional circumstances to go a certain way. 239 00:13:24,080 --> 00:13:26,280 And we might have expectations about that. 240 00:13:26,280 --> 00:13:31,080 But deep down, if we really look close and are honest with ourselves, 241 00:13:31,080 --> 00:13:38,280 there's a driving force or a desire for happiness and peace in our lives. 242 00:13:38,280 --> 00:13:40,080 I think that's on a personal level, 243 00:13:40,080 --> 00:13:44,680 that's really what it comes down to is just being at peace. 244 00:13:44,680 --> 00:13:52,080 And that's the kind of coaching I do is I work with people, 245 00:13:52,080 --> 00:13:56,880 collaborate with people, and talk about the ways in which 246 00:13:56,880 --> 00:14:00,680 we are pursuing happiness and peace in our lives, 247 00:14:00,680 --> 00:14:06,080 as well as the ways in which our pursuit for that peace and happiness 248 00:14:06,080 --> 00:14:12,280 actually, most times, contributes to the unhappiness that we experience. 249 00:14:12,280 --> 00:14:15,880 So there's a lot of ways in which, at the surface, 250 00:14:15,880 --> 00:14:19,680 we might feel like we're going in the right direction. 251 00:14:19,680 --> 00:14:23,280 But if we kind of peel back some of the layers 252 00:14:23,280 --> 00:14:28,880 and explore some of the distinctions with ourselves and are honest, 253 00:14:28,880 --> 00:14:32,080 it can be seen and recognized that, oh, wait, I'm actually 254 00:14:32,080 --> 00:14:36,280 contributing to a lot of the suffering that I'm experiencing 255 00:14:36,280 --> 00:14:40,080 in a very direct and practical way. 256 00:14:40,080 --> 00:14:44,880 So that's what the coaching is about. 257 00:14:44,880 --> 00:14:51,080 And that's, like you said, I know how uncommon the answer was that I gave. 258 00:14:51,080 --> 00:14:52,480 It was a beautiful answer. 259 00:14:52,480 --> 00:14:55,080 Oh, I agree. 260 00:14:55,080 --> 00:14:59,480 I've had deep level conversations with people for many, many years now 261 00:14:59,480 --> 00:15:02,680 and followed that same type of philosophy. 262 00:15:02,680 --> 00:15:08,880 But it would be really fun to get to shadow your conversations with people 263 00:15:08,880 --> 00:15:12,680 who say, man, I really want this sports car, 264 00:15:12,680 --> 00:15:16,680 or somebody else who's like, I just want my wife to do X, Y, or Z. 265 00:15:16,680 --> 00:15:18,680 If she would just do that, I would be happy. 266 00:15:18,680 --> 00:15:23,280 There's a different conversation you have with somebody who's 267 00:15:23,280 --> 00:15:26,680 so focused on the externals. 268 00:15:26,680 --> 00:15:29,080 I'll share a second layer on that, though. 269 00:15:29,080 --> 00:15:35,480 Peace is something that I don't have a very hard time moving into 270 00:15:35,480 --> 00:15:39,080 and being surrounded by. 271 00:15:39,080 --> 00:15:43,880 What is probably the secondary on that challenge, the opportunity, 272 00:15:43,880 --> 00:15:48,480 is that in my beliefs, I don't believe that happiness is something 273 00:15:48,480 --> 00:15:55,680 we're guaranteed on this earth and it's something that we are entitled to. 274 00:15:55,680 --> 00:16:03,080 And so, but I spent most of my years between probably six years old 275 00:16:03,080 --> 00:16:09,280 and 20-something years old not really knowing how to connect with happiness, 276 00:16:09,280 --> 00:16:13,480 getting kind of emotionally blocked from it, and finally coming to realize, 277 00:16:13,480 --> 00:16:19,480 like, oh, that would be kind of a nice thing to feel in half. 278 00:16:19,480 --> 00:16:23,080 So that's still something that I feel like I'm a rookie in, 279 00:16:23,080 --> 00:16:29,480 is how do I harness the opportunity to experience 280 00:16:29,480 --> 00:16:38,280 and truly feel happy more often and with more authenticity or conviction, 281 00:16:38,280 --> 00:16:40,280 more depth maybe. 282 00:16:40,280 --> 00:16:44,680 So that would be something that I think would be a lot of fun to talk about 283 00:16:44,680 --> 00:16:46,880 or perhaps peaceful to talk about. 284 00:16:46,880 --> 00:16:48,080 What are your thoughts on that? 285 00:16:48,080 --> 00:16:55,080 What does somebody do to unlock happiness in their life? 286 00:16:55,080 --> 00:17:01,880 I think you hit on in an interesting way a really important point, 287 00:17:01,880 --> 00:17:17,880 which is how often we focus on the story of the suffering, 288 00:17:17,880 --> 00:17:26,880 how often we focus on the why, the how, the narrative that gets built up 289 00:17:26,880 --> 00:17:29,080 on top of the suffering. 290 00:17:29,080 --> 00:17:36,280 So oftentimes there's this initial experience of I am upset 291 00:17:36,280 --> 00:17:44,080 and the conventional approach that is expressed in many different practices 292 00:17:44,080 --> 00:17:52,080 or ways of exploring suffering is to look for a reason why. 293 00:17:52,080 --> 00:17:57,080 I'm unhappy because of X, Y, and Z. 294 00:17:57,080 --> 00:17:59,880 I'm unhappy because of whatever. 295 00:17:59,880 --> 00:18:04,280 And so the narrative, it spans. 296 00:18:04,280 --> 00:18:07,680 So it starts out as I'm unhappy. 297 00:18:07,680 --> 00:18:10,480 Then there's some recognition that I'm unhappy 298 00:18:10,480 --> 00:18:14,680 because of this relationship that I'm in. 299 00:18:14,680 --> 00:18:19,080 And then maybe I work with a coach or a therapist or someone 300 00:18:19,080 --> 00:18:22,480 or maybe I just come to the conclusion myself that there's a correlation 301 00:18:22,480 --> 00:18:26,680 between the unhappiness I'm experiencing in this relationship 302 00:18:26,680 --> 00:18:32,880 and something that had to do with my parents and how they treated me as a child. 303 00:18:32,880 --> 00:18:37,080 And so there's this belief that if I understand the correlation 304 00:18:37,080 --> 00:18:42,080 between my specific conditioning as a child, 305 00:18:42,080 --> 00:18:45,480 my specific conditioning of the circumstances of my life, 306 00:18:45,480 --> 00:18:50,680 and my specific brand of suffering, if you will, 307 00:18:50,680 --> 00:18:57,680 that I'm going to suffer less or there's going to be something that happens 308 00:18:57,680 --> 00:19:04,680 in which I don't suffer anymore, which is not true. 309 00:19:04,680 --> 00:19:08,480 There's certainly something to be said for exploring the relationship 310 00:19:08,480 --> 00:19:12,880 between our suffering and our circumstances. 311 00:19:12,880 --> 00:19:19,280 But the happiness that we're looking for is not found there. 312 00:19:19,280 --> 00:19:30,080 It's like if you break the law because you rob a bank or you run a red light. 313 00:19:30,080 --> 00:19:33,880 It doesn't matter if it was the bank or the red light, you broke the law. 314 00:19:33,880 --> 00:19:40,680 It doesn't matter, I say in quotes, because it doesn't matter 315 00:19:40,680 --> 00:19:47,680 that I'm suffering because of a relationship or I'm suffering because of financial circumstances. 316 00:19:47,680 --> 00:19:55,880 When we focus on the specifics of the narrative, we're just building on top of the suffering. 317 00:19:55,880 --> 00:20:01,480 We're giving the suffering a backstory, which then just makes it more present in our lives, 318 00:20:01,480 --> 00:20:05,680 because now I'm not just suffering. I don't just have the experience of suffering. 319 00:20:05,680 --> 00:20:10,480 I have the experience of suffering because of my relationship, because of my childhood, 320 00:20:10,480 --> 00:20:16,480 because of all of this stuff that then just builds on top of the suffering. 321 00:20:16,480 --> 00:20:23,480 It reminds me of ignoring the principles of math, actually. 322 00:20:23,480 --> 00:20:27,880 What if you were to take a math formula and instead of doing, 323 00:20:27,880 --> 00:20:30,680 you're trying to solve a particular problem based on a test, 324 00:20:30,680 --> 00:20:35,880 but instead of subtracting, when you're supposed to subtract, you add, 325 00:20:35,880 --> 00:20:40,680 when you're supposed to subtract, or instead of dividing, when you're supposed to multiply. 326 00:20:40,680 --> 00:20:42,880 You would have a completely different outcome. 327 00:20:42,880 --> 00:20:48,880 All the elements are still the same, but because you've chosen to ignore the formula, 328 00:20:48,880 --> 00:20:52,480 you're going to come out with a completely different answer. 329 00:20:52,480 --> 00:20:58,680 As much as we want to pretend or feel like our life is unique, our story is ours, 330 00:20:58,680 --> 00:21:02,680 don't touch it. Keep your hand off of it, Jared. 331 00:21:02,680 --> 00:21:08,680 We can very much end up using our narrative and story against ourselves, 332 00:21:08,680 --> 00:21:14,080 is what I'm catching in this. I can see how, yes, you could very well become a self-fulfilling prophecy, 333 00:21:14,080 --> 00:21:17,680 or you could sit there and be so mad at that red light for the rest of your life, 334 00:21:17,680 --> 00:21:25,480 and use that object that you could miss the opportunity to move away from that one variable, 335 00:21:25,480 --> 00:21:32,680 move into other aspects that perhaps contributed to the reality. 336 00:21:32,680 --> 00:21:37,480 There's, I guess, one of the things that you said, I'm trying to remember exactly what it was, 337 00:21:37,480 --> 00:21:46,480 about driving toward, that's not the best approach to unlocking happiness. 338 00:21:46,480 --> 00:21:55,480 Is there a positive flip to that? What would be one of the greater approaches to unlocking it? 339 00:21:55,480 --> 00:22:00,480 Yeah, and the point that you made actually highlights that perfectly, or at least opens up a segue, 340 00:22:00,480 --> 00:22:08,480 which is that it's kind of like the plant that gets watered is the plant that grows. 341 00:22:08,480 --> 00:22:14,480 And the more that our attention is focused on the story of the suffering, the more the suffering grows, 342 00:22:14,480 --> 00:22:22,480 because that's what we're looking at. That's what we're paying attention to. That's what expands in our experience. 343 00:22:22,480 --> 00:22:29,480 So then the question appears of, okay, well, where do I look then? 344 00:22:29,480 --> 00:22:43,480 And if we go back to the previous point that I was making about, we start with the narrative of, I am upset, I am suffering. 345 00:22:43,480 --> 00:22:49,480 Instead of building in this direction and looking that direction towards explaining the suffering, 346 00:22:49,480 --> 00:22:59,480 we rather went the other direction, which is, in essence, what I think, or in my experience, 347 00:22:59,480 --> 00:23:07,480 what therapy and what a lot of these practices are intending to do is to kind of, how do we get ahead of the suffering? 348 00:23:07,480 --> 00:23:13,480 How do we go before the suffering so that I can see a truth that's going to tell me something 349 00:23:13,480 --> 00:23:20,480 that can kind of interrupt the momentum of whatever that suffering is? 350 00:23:20,480 --> 00:23:27,480 And that seems to me what the intent is, but oftentimes it winds up contributing in the way that I just said. 351 00:23:27,480 --> 00:23:36,480 So the way that we practically do that in our lives is right here, right now, if I'm experiencing suffering, 352 00:23:36,480 --> 00:23:44,480 rather than exploring the narrative of the suffering, I look to who is the one that is suffering. 353 00:23:44,480 --> 00:23:51,480 I look to the I that is suffering and I explore, what do I find there? 354 00:23:51,480 --> 00:24:02,480 So what often happens is there's this, it's an assumption, it's an assumption to be questioned. 355 00:24:02,480 --> 00:24:09,480 I am suffering. Who is the I that is suffering? What do you find when you look for that I? 356 00:24:09,480 --> 00:24:15,480 And most people, if given, well, I'll give you the opportunity now. 357 00:24:15,480 --> 00:24:27,480 When you are saying, referring to yourself as I in conversation, whether it's to yourself or to other people in conversation throughout the day, 358 00:24:27,480 --> 00:24:34,480 what are you referring to in those situations? 359 00:24:34,480 --> 00:24:44,480 I would think your own perspective, how you think and how you feel. 360 00:24:44,480 --> 00:24:52,480 Yeah. It's like a cluster of thoughts and feelings and beliefs, essentially, right? 361 00:24:52,480 --> 00:24:53,480 Right. 362 00:24:53,480 --> 00:25:02,480 And that's how most people define themselves, is this cluster, this locus of thoughts and feelings. 363 00:25:02,480 --> 00:25:10,480 And so that begs the question of, OK, is what I essentially am a thought or a feeling? 364 00:25:10,480 --> 00:25:17,480 Is what I essentially am actually defined by the thoughts and feelings that I experience? 365 00:25:17,480 --> 00:25:23,480 And so take a little step deeper and take a look at what is the nature of a thought? 366 00:25:23,480 --> 00:25:25,480 What is the nature of a feeling? 367 00:25:25,480 --> 00:25:33,480 And you close your eyes, you look at your thoughts, and sure enough, thoughts are constantly arising and disappearing, 368 00:25:33,480 --> 00:25:39,480 and feelings in a maybe different way are arising and disappearing. 369 00:25:39,480 --> 00:25:50,480 And yet, whatever I am remains present before, during, and after the thought appeared and disappeared. 370 00:25:50,480 --> 00:25:56,480 And yet, I never have the experience of a part of myself disappearing. 371 00:25:56,480 --> 00:26:02,480 I remain whole and intact even when every thought has arisen and disappeared. 372 00:26:02,480 --> 00:26:12,480 When the thought of a purple elephant appears, that image, it disappears in no time, and yet here I am, unchanged. 373 00:26:12,480 --> 00:26:17,480 So what I essentially am can't be a thought. 374 00:26:17,480 --> 00:26:22,480 It's not a thought because in my direct experience, in anyone's direct experience, 375 00:26:22,480 --> 00:26:28,480 all we know of thoughts and feelings is that they are constantly coming and going. 376 00:26:28,480 --> 00:26:33,480 And yet we remain present always. 377 00:26:33,480 --> 00:26:46,480 And it's that mixing of what we essentially are, that which is aware of and knows thoughts and feelings. 378 00:26:46,480 --> 00:26:53,480 When that gets mixed with experience, with thoughts and feelings, 379 00:26:53,480 --> 00:27:06,480 there's this identification and what we essentially are appears to clothe itself in the defining qualities of thoughts. 380 00:27:06,480 --> 00:27:20,480 And so the experience of I am aware of the feeling of anger turns into I am angry. 381 00:27:20,480 --> 00:27:31,480 What I am is defined by a feeling and limited by that feeling because there's this identification with the feeling. 382 00:27:31,480 --> 00:27:35,480 And the word itself, which I think adds some extra clarity to this, 383 00:27:35,480 --> 00:27:43,480 the word identification comes from two Latin words, idio and ficcio, which mean to make the same. 384 00:27:43,480 --> 00:27:54,480 So when there's identification with experience, there's the belief that experience defines what we literally are. 385 00:27:54,480 --> 00:28:00,480 And so that identification lies at the core of our suffering. 386 00:28:00,480 --> 00:28:09,480 It's the belief that what I am is defined by something that is limited and temporary. 387 00:28:09,480 --> 00:28:18,480 And so in that belief, we go out into the world and we try to satiate that feeling of incompleteness, 388 00:28:18,480 --> 00:28:24,480 that feeling of lack with things and relationships and activities. 389 00:28:24,480 --> 00:28:29,480 And we try to satiate it to find happiness. 390 00:28:29,480 --> 00:28:35,480 But the search for happiness is literally suffering. 391 00:28:35,480 --> 00:28:40,480 Suffering is literally the search for happiness, 392 00:28:40,480 --> 00:28:45,480 which only happens because we believe that happiness is something else. 393 00:28:45,480 --> 00:28:50,480 It comes from somewhere else. 394 00:28:50,480 --> 00:28:57,480 So that's a little bit of kind of the story there, where to look in the other direction. 395 00:28:57,480 --> 00:28:59,480 I got to dive one level deeper. 396 00:28:59,480 --> 00:29:08,480 We are so off topic on the show's typical route that I'm like drawn back, but I'm like, no, I got to think about this. 397 00:29:08,480 --> 00:29:15,480 This is you're like talking to a patient version of Jordan Peterson, which I enjoy listening to. 398 00:29:15,480 --> 00:29:20,480 So you just don't interrupt as much and you don't get as riled up. 399 00:29:20,480 --> 00:29:28,480 So with happiness and the suffering concept, let's dive one level deeper into that. 400 00:29:28,480 --> 00:29:39,480 So you said that suffering is the I'm going to paraphrase, but the kind of route to figuring out happiness. 401 00:29:39,480 --> 00:29:42,480 It's kind of the path through and to. 402 00:29:42,480 --> 00:29:45,480 Can you help us see that clear a little more clearly? 403 00:29:45,480 --> 00:29:50,480 Because I'm munching on that. I'm like, cool, I got to get to the depths of this. 404 00:29:50,480 --> 00:29:55,480 Yeah. So there's there's kind of two ways of looking at this. 405 00:29:55,480 --> 00:30:06,480 One of them is this this path of, like you said, looking at the suffering and where we. 406 00:30:06,480 --> 00:30:15,480 You essentially bring it as close as you can to yourself rather than pushing it away, 407 00:30:15,480 --> 00:30:27,480 because often there's this this want to I'm unhappy and I want to get rid of it as fast as possible. 408 00:30:27,480 --> 00:30:36,480 And so rather than being with the unhappiness, there's this immediate turning our attention towards, you know, 409 00:30:36,480 --> 00:30:43,480 picking up the phone or turning on the television or opening the fridge or doing whatever to distract us 410 00:30:43,480 --> 00:30:47,480 from the reality of the suffering that is being experienced. 411 00:30:47,480 --> 00:30:53,480 And what happens if we give the suffering. 412 00:30:53,480 --> 00:31:01,480 The space to simply be if we give ourselves the space to simply be with the suffering. 413 00:31:01,480 --> 00:31:05,480 If it gets close enough, we see that it's not what we are. 414 00:31:05,480 --> 00:31:12,480 It's not what defines us. It is simply experience. 415 00:31:12,480 --> 00:31:24,480 And this is challenging because it requires us to be honest with ourselves about our relationship to the suffering, 416 00:31:24,480 --> 00:31:33,480 because there's this question to ask to really test whether or not there's acceptance of the suffering, 417 00:31:33,480 --> 00:31:35,480 if there's acceptance of whatever the situation is. 418 00:31:35,480 --> 00:31:44,480 And it's the question of can I be with this experience for the rest of my life? 419 00:31:44,480 --> 00:31:52,480 And if your answer to that is no, then you don't accept it, which means there's something deeper. 420 00:31:52,480 --> 00:31:56,480 It means it's not brought in close enough. 421 00:31:56,480 --> 00:32:04,480 And that kind of raises the second approach here, which is what I was getting to previously, 422 00:32:04,480 --> 00:32:11,480 which is questioning the one who doesn't accept the suffering. 423 00:32:11,480 --> 00:32:16,480 Who is it that is resisting the suffering? 424 00:32:16,480 --> 00:32:25,480 Just like who is it that is suffering? Who is the one, the I, that is suffering? 425 00:32:25,480 --> 00:32:30,480 And when we follow that path, like I was kind of speaking to before, 426 00:32:30,480 --> 00:32:48,480 we recognize that the suffering is essentially an identification that we have with the person we think we are. 427 00:32:48,480 --> 00:32:54,480 It's a mixing of what we essentially are with the person we think we are. 428 00:32:54,480 --> 00:33:04,480 It's a mixing of being aware of thoughts and feelings with what the thoughts and feelings are saying. 429 00:33:04,480 --> 00:33:17,480 So if a thought says, I'm upset, and if I believe that what that thought is saying is what defines me, then what I am is upset. 430 00:33:17,480 --> 00:33:25,480 So there's kind of two directions that wind up in the same place, 431 00:33:25,480 --> 00:33:38,480 but it comes back to recognizing what you essentially are and the nature of what you essentially are as not being defined or limited in any way 432 00:33:38,480 --> 00:33:45,480 by the experience, by the circumstances, by the thoughts, feelings, sensations, perceptions 433 00:33:45,480 --> 00:33:51,480 that you are aware of. 434 00:33:51,480 --> 00:33:59,480 The brilliance and genius in your coaching is amazing, Jared. 435 00:33:59,480 --> 00:34:13,480 I have learned so much in the last 10 minutes that I plan on diving very deep into for many months, if not years, and of course, falling up on. 436 00:34:13,480 --> 00:34:20,480 I really hope more and more people find this. 437 00:34:20,480 --> 00:34:28,480 One of the correlations that your path has reminded me of is some of the changes that have existed in the world. 438 00:34:28,480 --> 00:34:31,480 I'm not of the mindset and belief that the world has gotten worse. 439 00:34:31,480 --> 00:34:35,480 I'm of the mindset that it has gotten better and worse. 440 00:34:35,480 --> 00:34:45,480 In many respects, there's lots of things that don't happen today that used to happen a lot in the past, 441 00:34:45,480 --> 00:34:51,480 a lot more in the past in different societies that we don't have to suffer with and worry about today. 442 00:34:51,480 --> 00:35:02,480 That said, one of the big concerns out there is the amount of suicide that is happening and the growth rate of suicide. 443 00:35:02,480 --> 00:35:10,480 What it really reminds me of is this conversation you talked about of the story and the narrative and getting involved in that. 444 00:35:10,480 --> 00:35:17,480 If I look back a few thousand years, based on history and what I've seen from history or a few hundred years, 445 00:35:17,480 --> 00:35:27,480 there was a lot less people who could journal and who had time to self-consume in their own story and their own narrative. 446 00:35:27,480 --> 00:35:34,480 It's making me realize, wow, while yes, I do believe it's important to write certain things, 447 00:35:34,480 --> 00:35:47,480 you can create such a vicious storm around yourself of retelling yourself that narrative over and over and over and really cultivating the negativity that has occurred in your life. 448 00:35:47,480 --> 00:36:00,480 There is a great power and responsibility that comes with utilizing that mechanism as a means to understand who we are. 449 00:36:00,480 --> 00:36:05,480 I'm going to leave it right there where it's at. We're going to move into some of the core questions. 450 00:36:05,480 --> 00:36:26,480 I can see a direct correlation between my own, especially teenage-year anger and the fact that I was constantly reliving that narrative and not figuring out the ways to escape it. 451 00:36:26,480 --> 00:36:38,480 If I could have just moved forward, moved on with the next part of my life rather than reliving all of the pain that I was going through and constantly nurturing that, 452 00:36:38,480 --> 00:36:46,480 yeah, life would not have felt so stuck in the here and now. 453 00:36:46,480 --> 00:36:56,480 There's almost so much brilliance in what you're talking about that also goes against the grains of what is taught in traditional psychology and therapy. 454 00:36:56,480 --> 00:37:12,480 It's like, wow, it makes me want to take a torch to traditional psychology rather than be like, let's fix the formula the right way. 455 00:37:12,480 --> 00:37:16,480 Again, I'll leave that where it's at. We'll dive right into your vision. 456 00:37:16,480 --> 00:37:29,480 What is your vision, Jared, for those that you serve? 457 00:37:29,480 --> 00:37:47,480 Well, it's for people to recognize that the happiness, the peace for which they are seeking in their lives is the nature of their very being. 458 00:37:47,480 --> 00:38:09,480 That it's not something that comes at the end of a long journey of changing myself, of changing my circumstances, of changing the world, but rather it's the first step. 459 00:38:09,480 --> 00:38:32,480 And when that recognition happens in time, naturally, our circumstances, our behaviors, our activities, our relationships, our lives, naturally fall into alignment with this new recognition. 460 00:38:32,480 --> 00:38:48,480 And if I can add a little additional context to that, it's similar to the illusion of a mirage in the desert. 461 00:38:48,480 --> 00:38:57,480 Oftentimes you hear people say, you know, I am an illusion, the world is an illusion, suffering is an illusion, and think that there's a truth to that. 462 00:38:57,480 --> 00:39:20,480 But what often is misunderstood is the word, the definition of the word illusion, what is being meant in those, those wisdoms, which is people interpreted as them saying that the world isn't real, or your suffering isn't real, or you are not real, which is not the case. 463 00:39:20,480 --> 00:39:35,480 An illusion is real. A mirage in the desert is a real mirage. The nuance is that an illusion, what is real about an illusion is not what it appears to be. 464 00:39:35,480 --> 00:39:54,480 So the world, what is real about the world, what is real about our suffering, what is real about what we essentially are is not what it appears to be. And recognizing that distinction for ourselves is the driving force behind our recognition of happiness and peace in our lives. 465 00:39:54,480 --> 00:40:19,480 And the point that I was making about the mirage was that the way that you see the truth of the mirage is not by changing the water that you see in the distance, it's by going up and looking at what the water really is, which is just the play of light across the heat of the sand. 466 00:40:19,480 --> 00:40:31,480 You don't have to do anything with the water. We don't have to do anything with our suffering. We just have to recognize the truth of what is really there. 467 00:40:31,480 --> 00:40:53,480 Just like when you walk up to, if you stay at a distance and you keep looking at the mirage, it's always going to look like water. It's always going to look like a pool off in the distance. But the closer and closer you get, the closer and closer you get to the truth, the clearer and clearer it appears to you. 468 00:40:53,480 --> 00:41:13,480 And it stops looking like water. But of course, the second you go back away from it and you turn around, it's still going to look like a pool of water. So it's not the appearance of the illusion that disappears, it's our ignorance of the truth which disappears. 469 00:41:13,480 --> 00:41:27,480 And ignorance, ignorance not in the sense of like pejorative, like unintelligent. I mean literally the ignoring of the truth. We can't ignore it when we experience it. So experience it. 470 00:41:27,480 --> 00:41:29,480 I love that. 471 00:41:29,480 --> 00:41:38,480 What about your vision for yourself? What do you see for yourself on the horizon? 472 00:41:38,480 --> 00:41:53,480 The extension of the vision for others, I mean I've always seen myself as like patient zero, right? Like if something doesn't work for me, I'm not going to suggest it to someone else. 473 00:41:53,480 --> 00:42:16,480 So what I've recognized in my own life is that more and more my relationships, my experiences, my activities, and my life is expressing this happiness and this peace. 474 00:42:16,480 --> 00:42:34,480 And the more that that happens, the more I feel empowered to speak to it, to respond when people question these things. Because I'm just speaking from experience. 475 00:42:34,480 --> 00:42:46,480 It's not my truth, it's the truth of experience. It's just we're not used to looking to experience this way. And so we're not used to seeing things this way. I don't claim it. 476 00:42:46,480 --> 00:43:05,480 And going back to Rupert, Rupert doesn't claim it either. It's a truth that anyone has access to. It's just whether or not it's communicated clearly, it resonates with a person, and that's really all it is. 477 00:43:05,480 --> 00:43:08,480 That's amazing. 478 00:43:08,480 --> 00:43:16,480 We're running low on time today, which is not a bad problem. 479 00:43:16,480 --> 00:43:31,480 I think I'm going to dive into the leadership questions a bit. What's the worst leadership experience that you've ever had? 480 00:43:31,480 --> 00:43:42,480 It's really tough to narrow down one situation, but there's absolutely an overarching theme, which is 481 00:43:42,480 --> 00:44:03,480 any time that I have confused the pursuit of control or power over the recognition that leadership is. And what I mean by that is that 482 00:44:03,480 --> 00:44:25,480 leadership is what is bestowed upon us by those who follow. It's not for us to decide. And so any time I found myself thinking that I was the one in control, the one deciding for someone else, I wasn't leading. 483 00:44:25,480 --> 00:44:38,480 The times, and there have been very challenging experiences, particularly the beginning of my career when I thought that it was my job to tell people what to do. 484 00:44:38,480 --> 00:44:56,480 When I thought that it was my job to find some psychological back door entrance into people and trick them into doing something or finding some point of leverage. That's not leading. 485 00:44:56,480 --> 00:45:11,480 Those are good followers, good listeners. That's what makes a good leader. And the times that I haven't done that have been the worst leadership experiences, to say the least. 486 00:45:11,480 --> 00:45:29,480 I would concur completely. On that note, is there a place for procedures, resources and templates, or would a leader best lead by allowing people to simply figure it out? 487 00:45:29,480 --> 00:45:31,480 It's a mix of both. 488 00:45:31,480 --> 00:45:37,480 There's a balance there. Absolutely. 489 00:45:37,480 --> 00:45:53,480 One of the fun things about this podcast, everybody is like, I want to dive in deep and get everything about Jared's perspective. And at the same time, we're going to be moving on to life. And in life, we're going to have the opportunity for trial and error. 490 00:45:53,480 --> 00:46:06,480 And that's part of what leads to the peace, happiness, and of course, the suffering, all of which contributes to our growth. And so we're not here to, Jared's not here to spoon feed me everything. 491 00:46:06,480 --> 00:46:11,480 As much as I'm doing, the spoon bolts are giving me. 492 00:46:11,480 --> 00:46:25,480 We will keep moving. How would you define your best leadership experience? What does that look like? 493 00:46:25,480 --> 00:46:32,480 Best leadership experience. 494 00:46:32,480 --> 00:46:38,480 At least in my line of work, I think this simple 495 00:46:38,480 --> 00:46:53,480 seeing someone like recognizing when someone sees their own freedom, their own power, their own potential. 496 00:46:53,480 --> 00:47:03,480 Each time someone takes a step closer to that each time someone sees something from a new perspective that opens up a new door for them. 497 00:47:03,480 --> 00:47:07,480 That's that's the best thing for me. I love that. 498 00:47:07,480 --> 00:47:10,480 And I never see that as something that I did. 499 00:47:10,480 --> 00:47:25,480 I see it as something that someone does for themselves. And when people do that for themselves and people grab a hold of the reins of their own freedom and potential in their lives. 500 00:47:25,480 --> 00:47:33,480 That and connect with the truth. I mean, that's that's what it is for me. That's the best experience. 501 00:47:33,480 --> 00:47:40,480 Man, once again, a lot of positive reflections and happy memories on that. A lot of recent months. 502 00:47:40,480 --> 00:47:45,480 One, I got to give a major shout out to Cynthia, who's helping us in the back end. 503 00:47:45,480 --> 00:47:53,480 Cynthia is now running our Spanish podcast and stepping into that, owning that and then coming back and she did. 504 00:47:53,480 --> 00:47:57,480 She wants to give me the credit and no, it has nothing to do with me. 505 00:47:57,480 --> 00:48:04,480 You know, sure, I certainly was excited to see her step into that, but she had to do that. 506 00:48:04,480 --> 00:48:07,480 Right. She had to be the one to step up for it. She had to want it. 507 00:48:07,480 --> 00:48:10,480 You know, she had to go after it if she was going to do it. And she did. 508 00:48:10,480 --> 00:48:20,480 And seeing her light up and seeing hearing her talk, you know, from her soul's depth, you know, about the value of that experience, the importance of it. 509 00:48:20,480 --> 00:48:24,480 You're 100 percent right. It's one of the most amazing experiences to have. 510 00:48:24,480 --> 00:48:30,480 And we're trying to unlock that with when I say trying, you know, it's it's not a forceful thing. 511 00:48:30,480 --> 00:48:36,480 It's just an opportunity. How do we inspire people to to have those types of experiences? 512 00:48:36,480 --> 00:48:47,480 And who is my executive assistant has come up with a genius level management system that she is for herself just to manage her own time. 513 00:48:47,480 --> 00:49:08,480 And as we saw it, we were like, oh, if we applied this for everybody, then everybody would have like we would know how to delegate better, how to know what people's bandwidths are, also how to take some of these assignments and assign them to other people with like I've never seen a system more geniusly designed. 514 00:49:08,480 --> 00:49:17,480 And I'm hoping that over time, she will also come to that realization that, you know, I was the creator of this experience. 515 00:49:17,480 --> 00:49:29,480 I mean, I'll really just own the value of, wow, I can continue to contribute at this level and unlock myself, you know, to to. 516 00:49:29,480 --> 00:49:34,480 And again, it's not about what they give. It's just about that feeling right. 517 00:49:34,480 --> 00:49:52,480 It's about having that feeling with people. That is the coolest part of it is feeling that fullness of self appreciation that that to me is I think that's what you're what you're getting at and what you're talking about is watching people unlock that right. 518 00:49:52,480 --> 00:49:56,480 It's this. 519 00:49:56,480 --> 00:49:58,480 It's what it is. 520 00:49:58,480 --> 00:50:02,480 Oh, you're like Jordan Peterson, man. You don't watch him. Yeah, who is. 521 00:50:02,480 --> 00:50:05,480 I know who he is. Yeah, I don't I don't follow him too much. 522 00:50:05,480 --> 00:50:12,480 You know, YouTube algorithm keeps hitting me and probably going to end up with Mr. Rupert on my YouTube for a while now. 523 00:50:12,480 --> 00:50:14,480 So that'll be fun. 524 00:50:14,480 --> 00:50:16,480 All right. Last lesson. 525 00:50:16,480 --> 00:50:36,480 And literally, if this were the last lesson, the last opportunity to share a powerful lesson with other visionaries, what can they learn from your experience? 526 00:50:46,480 --> 00:50:53,480 One simple word comes to mind. 527 00:50:53,480 --> 00:50:57,480 And I don't mean it in a cheesy way. 528 00:50:57,480 --> 00:51:02,480 But the word is love. 529 00:51:02,480 --> 00:51:07,480 As well, you can't. 530 00:51:07,480 --> 00:51:14,480 Maybe just add like one thing on that. 531 00:51:14,480 --> 00:51:22,480 Love is what we recognize as what unites us. 532 00:51:22,480 --> 00:51:24,480 Same with truth. 533 00:51:24,480 --> 00:51:29,480 Truth is where our experiences meet. 534 00:51:29,480 --> 00:51:34,480 Love is where the differences between us dissolve. 535 00:51:34,480 --> 00:51:58,480 And so any visionary that uses love and truth as their foundation is is building something on solid rock is building something that will stand the test of time. 536 00:51:58,480 --> 00:52:02,480 That would be my suggestion. 537 00:52:02,480 --> 00:52:04,480 I'm a big fan. 538 00:52:04,480 --> 00:52:09,480 Our foundation for first class businesses very much built on love. 539 00:52:09,480 --> 00:52:13,480 And it is something we're constantly gravitating towards. 540 00:52:13,480 --> 00:52:15,480 I'll add to that. 541 00:52:15,480 --> 00:52:17,480 I knew you were going to say love, dude. 542 00:52:17,480 --> 00:52:19,480 I didn't know, but I was so excited for you to say it. 543 00:52:19,480 --> 00:52:22,480 I was like, yes, he's going to hate love. 544 00:52:22,480 --> 00:52:41,480 And the one of the greatest weaknesses, in my opinion, of our modern world that is driven predominantly, at least our portion of the world, by the English language, is the reality that love has no conjugation. 545 00:52:41,480 --> 00:52:52,480 For those who don't speak a foreign language, what that means is the format of the word love does not change based on the context of how we use it. 546 00:52:52,480 --> 00:53:10,480 And maybe I'm just ultra ignorant and the one who took a long time to realize it, even though I did very well in English class, even though I became a very good writer, I did not realize that love was a verb until I was in my 30s. 547 00:53:10,480 --> 00:53:13,480 That is scary to me. 548 00:53:13,480 --> 00:53:26,480 With the amount I've studied it, with the amount that I've loved to talk about it and have tried to build my life around it, the fact that it took that long, and it was the Spanish language that unlocked that for me. 549 00:53:26,480 --> 00:53:29,480 I've spoken Spanish since 19 years old. 550 00:53:29,480 --> 00:53:33,480 So, you know, it wasn't even a quick realization either. 551 00:53:33,480 --> 00:53:36,480 Again, it took another 11 years to really grasp that. 552 00:53:36,480 --> 00:53:46,480 And a lot of what prevented it was just how ignorant I was to how to apply love as a verb. 553 00:53:46,480 --> 00:53:50,480 Granted, there's probably a lot of selfishness driven behind that too. 554 00:53:50,480 --> 00:53:53,480 You know, there's probably a lot of things that contributed to it. 555 00:53:53,480 --> 00:54:09,480 But I realized how much easier it is to realize that we can take actions with love in the service of others once I finally understood the core nature of the word and it wasn't just something that I received. 556 00:54:09,480 --> 00:54:14,480 Right. It wasn't something that just made me feel or a feeling that I wanted. 557 00:54:14,480 --> 00:54:23,480 It's literally the core of the actions that we take to, I don't know, bring light, manifest goodness to others. 558 00:54:23,480 --> 00:54:35,480 It was a profound realization. And, you know, I'm constantly trying to study what is it about life and our society and our cultures and I live in multiple cultures. 559 00:54:35,480 --> 00:54:44,480 You know, I teach predominantly and talk to predominantly a team of Latinos and that constantly influences my life. 560 00:54:44,480 --> 00:54:52,480 And then I go and I meet my American counterparts and there's a totally different feeling and set of practices and beliefs and beyond. 561 00:54:52,480 --> 00:54:58,480 So, man, I just got to say thank you, Mike, from the bottom of my heart. 562 00:54:58,480 --> 00:55:01,480 This was such an amazing interview. 563 00:55:01,480 --> 00:55:07,480 Those visionaries who are listening in, I hope you go back and I hope you took notes. 564 00:55:07,480 --> 00:55:10,480 Hope you get the chance to go back and listen to this. 565 00:55:10,480 --> 00:55:16,480 We'll put Jared's information in the action steps below the show on the landing page. 566 00:55:16,480 --> 00:55:21,480 I highly recommend expanding your relationship and conversation with him. 567 00:55:21,480 --> 00:55:23,480 For those of you listening, you know that. 568 00:55:23,480 --> 00:55:26,480 I mean, you caught the essence of that while we talked. 569 00:55:26,480 --> 00:55:31,480 If you have a vision you'd like to share in the top right corner, be our guest. 570 00:55:31,480 --> 00:55:36,480 You do not have to be as profoundly deep as Jared to be on the show. 571 00:55:36,480 --> 00:55:40,480 And you don't have to be world famous either. 572 00:55:40,480 --> 00:55:49,480 We're looking for people who have visions that are uplifting others, people who are fantastic leaders, people who lean into wanting to serve those around them. 573 00:55:49,480 --> 00:55:55,480 And if that's you and you've got a vision to share, then definitely apply to come on our stage and do that. 574 00:55:55,480 --> 00:56:01,480 Knowing that we're also searching for the type of leader who's creating a path for people to seek beyond the vision. 575 00:56:01,480 --> 00:56:14,480 That is very important as leaders, I feel, is our duty and responsibility not just to drop a tiny bit of wisdom, but to also be prepared for those who come after that and say, hey, where do we go from here? 576 00:56:14,480 --> 00:56:25,480 It's important to be able to serve the sphere of influence that we've created our life around attracting. 577 00:56:25,480 --> 00:56:33,480 And that goes very strongly back to what Jared said about the worst and the best leadership experiences. 578 00:56:33,480 --> 00:56:36,480 That's how I hope our leaders continue to show up. 579 00:56:36,480 --> 00:56:43,480 So thank you for showing up and doing that in fantastic fashion, Jared. 580 00:56:43,480 --> 00:56:54,480 I'm so happy with the present and I look forward to the future as it pertains to our relationship as well as to your success of helping others, man. 581 00:56:54,480 --> 00:56:59,480 Thank you for having me, Jackson. It's been a great experience speaking with you and working with your team. 582 00:56:59,480 --> 00:57:02,480 Absolutely. And I appreciate you going over with me a little bit too. 583 00:57:02,480 --> 00:57:06,480 Vision Pros, you all have a fantastic rest of your day and we will see you on the next episode. 584 00:57:06,480 --> 00:57:10,480 Thank you for being here today. I'm really happy that you tuned in to Vision Pros Live. 585 00:57:10,480 --> 00:57:15,480 I'm really looking forward to seeing your reactions as these episodes continue to move forward. 586 00:57:15,480 --> 00:57:18,480 This is going to get more and more fun. We'll have more and more engagement as well. 587 00:57:18,480 --> 00:57:46,480 I want to invite people to participate in the show and thank you for giving us your time and attention. Have an excellent time building out.