Welcome to the Happy Healthy Hustle podcast where we explore the intersection of health,
happiness and productivity.
I'm your host Christiana and I'm super excited to be here with you today.
Today's episode is based on a 2022 Instagram Live recording with a special guest, Mary
Ochsner.
I met Mary on Instagram where she's available at Mary Ochsner and she got me started with
yoga because she teaches beginner yoga tutorials to help you get started practicing.
She also has an app that's called Yoga Plus and I'm super thrilled that she is here with
us today to share some of her wellness secrets.
So let's hear it from Mary.
I'm going to be talking with Mary Oxner, super excited about women in wellness.
Happy Wednesday, wellness day.
Yeah, happy Wednesday.
So Mary, why don't you tell us a little bit where you are right now and maybe what is
your secret superpower?
Because you're certainly so inspiring to all of us in this woman in wellness.
I love that question of, you know, what is my superpower?
Because I don't think enough of us take the time to really pause and reflect on what are
we really good at?
Like, what do we really thrive in?
So when you asked me that, you want to know what came to mind for me first is my ability
to feel my feelings, being an emotional person.
I think that is my superpower.
And I want to expand on that just a little bit more.
I feel like my whole life being emotional was kind of frowned upon.
And that's not like, it wasn't like my mom and dad didn't want me to show emotions.
I could always come to them for it.
But it's like society, like, you know, you'd apologize, like, oh, you'd start crying, you'd
try to hold it back.
You try to like make sure no one could see that you were crying or upset about something.
And I feel like so many people try to suppress that when it's happening, instead of opening
it up and allowing it to just flow and be and then you and then you process those feelings
that you're going through.
So I think that's my superpower.
And I encourage other people to kind of take note, you know, do I feel like do I catch
myself apologizing for how I'm feeling?
Do I catch myself holding things back?
And if so, how are you able to take a step to shift that into allowing yourself to feel?
I think that that's such an important thing, as you mentioned, learning and listening to
your feelings, because when you connect with yoga, you also feel certain things in your
body.
And some days your body doesn't feel great.
So maybe just working through that acknowledging it, because maybe your mind hasn't quite registered
it.
But then your body tells you something isn't quite right today.
That's okay.
On some days, I can do the split just perfectly.
And on some other days, I'm like, I give myself grace.
It's not happening today.
I love that.
Yes.
honoring your body is one of the biggest lessons that I've learned from yoga always like, prior
to when I started practicing, it was always like, push yourself to the limit, go as hard
as you can, like, you know, don't stop like if you, you know, keep going, push, push,
push.
And it was very like that masculine energy of like, go, go, go push further strive, like,
you're never satisfied.
Where I feel like when I started practicing yoga, it kind of shifted that for me.
And that's what made it so much more enjoyable and made me want to keep showing up on my
mat was that I was able to honor myself for exactly as I was in that moment.
And if that day felt like pushing myself, hell yeah.
If I didn't feel like if I felt like I needed more rest and relaxation, I would honor that
and I would do that.
And it's, it's such an important thing.
And you'll find that when you learn how to do that on your yoga mat, you'll start to
be able to do that in your time off of the mat too.
You know, you'll start to do your everyday life.
Yeah, because yoga can be challenging and can be restorative.
It's just there are these different facets.
And as you mentioned, you need to listen to your body or your feelings and then respond
accordingly.
We talked about the mind, we talked about the body and May is all about mental health
as well.
So let's maybe also talk a little bit about the challenges.
What challenges do you experience and how did you overcome them yourself?
So I, there's so many different challenges that I've had to overcome, you know, throughout
this journey.
I think one of the biggest ones, which is just a general theme is overcoming that fear
or that self doubt.
You know, I'm not good enough to do this or that fear of failure is if I do this, am I
going to fail?
Are people going to laugh at me?
Like is it, is it going to be an embarrassment?
And that kind of has been one of the challenges that I've seen come up many times throughout
my journey through yoga, as well as entrepreneurship.
I know for me, like the biggest challenge for me was building up that courage and that
bravery to quit my job, my full time comfortable, easy job that I knew what I was doing to start
a business that I kind of didn't know exactly what I was doing.
And to get to that place to work through those limiting beliefs that I had and to build that
confidence in myself and to be able to, you know, let go of the how and trust and have
faith that if this is what I want, if this is what I'm striving for, I will get there
in my own time.
I will be guided, you know, in whatever you believe in the universe, God, source energy
will guide me towards where I need to be headed and what my, you know, destination is.
So, you know, I say that that is a lot easier said than done.
It takes practice, you know, as you continue to evolve on your journey, new challenges
are going to show up for you.
It's kind of a never ending thing.
And you just learn how to get better and better at processing and working through them.
So like I said, the biggest one for me was probably quitting my job to do something that
I felt very called to do and very passionate about when on paper, it might not have made
sense, you know, it's like, again, going from
that safe, comfortable place to this very scary unknown place.
But being able to work through that and do that makes me so much more confident moving
forward whenever new things start to scare me, scare me or make me feel, you know, that
unease or am I good enough or am I going to fail?
It's like, you practice working through that.
Yeah.
And, you know, sometimes in life, you kind of have to look at what deep down did I always
want to do?
Maybe that's something I wanted to do.
So why wait?
Let's just do it.
And sometimes you think there's never going to be the perfect time where everything lines
up and it seems like this is the time I should quit my job.
Just go for it and then everything right falls into place, you know.
Yup.
It's definitely very scary.
And to have faith in that unknown is like I said, it's a lot easier said than done.
It took me years to get to that point where I actually made that leap.
But now in hindsight, looking back, it's the greatest decision I have ever made.
And I feel like when we when we feel that nudge and that tug within our heart and soul
to do something for me, it was start a business, but it could be anything.
You know, that's where we need to trust that inner voice more than we probably do, or at
least more than I was at the time.
We trust that voice and know that like if we're feeling called and pulled in a certain
direction, listen to that.
That is your sign and start to take those steps towards that the best you can.
That's very inspiring because I think that all of us dream and have this little bucket
list of things and we think, oh yeah, one day I will do it.
And you know, maybe that's something that I will put off for now.
And we just laid our days maybe like thinking about this in our minds and maybe just try
and go for it.
And that also leads perfectly to the next question, because we might have that support
system in our lives.
So let's talk a little bit about who helped you along this journey, which definitely sounds
like what we see is like, oh, she's just so successful, but it took years to get there.
So who helped you get there, who was the strongest people like we're standing on the sidelines?
There are, so there are a few facets to this.
You know, obviously the people that have played the biggest role would be like my husband,
my friends, my family.
I'm very, very, very grateful to have a very supportive inner circle that surrounds me.
And I realize not everyone has that, you know, sometimes if you, you know, you tell your
hopes and dreams to your family or friends, sometimes they're supportive.
And sometimes they're like, wait, you're going to do that.
Like are you sure?
Like they kind of keep pushing that doubt.
And so, you know, I don't ever want that to be something that holds somebody back because
again, it's your life that you're living.
If you are feeling called to do something, that responsibility is yours to keep taking
those steps forward.
But it absolutely helps when you have a good circle of people around you.
And I was very grateful because, you know, there's a quote that's like, you know, you
become like the five people that you spend most of your time with.
And so that's where I, you know, I took that to heart and I encourage you to as well, like
everyone listening, you know, you get to choose who you surround yourself.
You may not get to choose the family you were born into, but you can choose the people that
are going to be in your inner circle.
And when you are living life from your aligned place, guess what?
You're going to start attracting more people like that into your life.
And I know for me, like as I was going through that transition of working full time into
entrepreneurship, I started attracting more entrepreneurial friends into my inner circle.
And then the things that I was doing that felt kind of crazy and out there and risky
felt so much more normal.
So having a very loving and supportive husband, having, you know, developing, I have a great
friend network, but then also expanding that into people that were doing similar things
that I was doing really made it helpful in taking that journey and continuing along that
journey.
And then as you're on it, again, you start to attract more people that are doing those
things.
So like my business partners in the app are like some of my best friends, like they're,
you know, yes, they're business partners, but they're also like friends and they've
helped support and help me grow my business to where it is today.
The other thing, so the other facets, that's kind of like the in-person section of it.
And, you know, I feel like sometimes it can feel hard to meet people, but again, that
falls back into that faith and that trust that like, if you are putting yourself out
there as authentically as you can, you are going to attract similar people into your
life.
But then we have this beautiful thing called the internet now and social media.
And now we can connect with people all over the world.
And that's one thing that I love is I've been able to connect with so many people that I
never would have been able to before if it wasn't for the internet.
But just like in-person friends, the same thing is going to happen online.
So you know, if you're following a bunch of pages and things that don't inspire you and
lift you up and make you feel excited to take on the day, you need to kind of audit who
you're following and who you're allowing into your social media inner circle.
And so I know for me, that's something where if I'm following pages that aren't inspiring
me or aren't making me feel good, get them out of here.
Like if you ever want to follow them again, go for it.
But like clear them out and create that space for the people that you want to be inspiring
you to fill in.
And so that's what's really cool about the internet is you're able to connect with so
many people that you never have before.
I've been able to make many Instagram friends that literally live in different parts of
the United States, different countries that I never would have been able to connect with
otherwise.
So that has been a really cool way to develop a support system that I would have never had
otherwise.
So don't feel like, you know, if whatever it is you're striving for, if like your friends
aren't, you know, kind of where you would like them to be, or you know, your social
media isn't quite where you want it to be, allow there to be shift and change there and
put yourself out there like you can create some really strong relationships nowadays,
even if they're not people that like live in your town that you're like going to get
coffee with in person, you can hop on a zoom call and have coffee with them or whatever.
So yeah, and really responding to that, obviously, is that when you open your social media, you
also look at it as that's your self care.
So you want to maybe pamper your soul and pamper your mind with something that actually
will make you happy and spark that joy.
So looking at things that don't lead to that is going to be quite frustrating.
And I did the same thing.
I was kind of going through and I was like, why am I actually following these people?
You know, I don't need to do this.
Nobody forces me to do this.
So I'm just going to let go and letting go is sometimes a really good way to nourish
your soul because you're realizing that maybe that connection just fed negative energy into
your life and you didn't need that.
Exactly.
Absolutely.
I know that there's one thing we say on the podcast a lot is be grateful for your triggers.
So I know that like when there would be certain things that would trigger me in social media,
it was like that gave me the opportunity to do work on why that's triggering.
But that doesn't mean that you need to keep following those people and that you need to
keep them there.
You know, it's like you want to do that work yourself and see like, why is this bugging
you so much?
Or why do I feel hurt by seeing this?
You know, that will give you like a lens of like, you know, diving deeper into your own
self development journey, but you need to be very mindful of what you're keeping in
there because again, you know, your thoughts create your reality around you.
And if the things that you are consuming are giving you negative thoughts, it's going to
create a negative reality in your life.
I feel like there have been so many life lessons I've learned through parenthood and becoming
a mom because it does it really throws you for a loop.
I mean, your entire world changes, your priorities shift and change.
You know, you're not the same person after you have a baby and navigating that is a very
beautiful thing.
But it's also I mean, it's a complex thing.
And you do you get so like, that has been probably one of my biggest themes the last
12 months is then like, truly being present.
And you know, I practice that in a lot of ways through yoga, through breathwork, through
meditation, but becoming a mom, I have really had to hone that skill in because it does
it just all goes by in a blink of an eye.
And so I do feel like that's one of the skills that I've really honed in on and mastered
the last 12 months is is being present.
And it's a practice like just like anything else.
It's a practice.
It's something that you're going to have good days, you're going to have bad days, and that's
okay.
Like we just show up, we do our very best we can.
And that's all we can really do.
I did a mindfulness study with my students and I asked them, so you engage in mindfulness,
you practice some breathwork, you go for walks, how you take care of yourself.
And they gave me different examples.
But the one thing is, I also asked them, why don't you do these things on a database?
And they said, well, we just don't have time.
And I told them that that will probably never change.
It will probably just get more complex as you add those responsibilities to your life,
whether it's getting a new pet, having a child, maybe purchasing a house, starting a really
stressful job.
The time is so challenging.
And that's just something you have to be the master of your own destiny in your day.
So how, how would you recommend?
What's your biggest recommendation to manage time?
So there are two things that I have to say about time management.
And that being kind of one of those excuses that a lot of people say.
And like, I'm not going to sit here and pretend like I've mastered it because there's no doubt
in my mind, especially the last year, that not having enough time has been my excuse.
But it's like, I need to practice what I preach because when you tell yourself, I don't have
enough time to do this.
I am so busy.
I have so many things to do.
I'm overwhelmed.
I don't have enough time to do the self care practices I want to do.
When you tell yourself that story, guess what?
You're not going to have time.
You're going to keep attracting no time, feeling busy, feeling overwhelmed into your life.
But that's not always the case.
You sometimes need to get a little creative.
And like I said, I'm not going to sit here and pretend like I am the master of this because
I'm still very much working through this myself.
But an example would be I have two things that I've recently been doing to give myself
that time.
So I have to give up the fact that like, basically from the morning till the evening until Ava's
in bed, during that time, it's challenging to do any real thing.
And in so this morning, for example, I woke up before she woke up and I went down into
our spare bedroom and I did a nice breathwork meditation to start my day.
And then this evening, like so actually this last month has been a really big theme of
mine is to take time in the evening to get back into my journaling practice.
So those are two things that I'm making an effort to include into my day that that work
really well.
The other thing is asking for help.
If you're feeling very overwhelmed, is there something like, you know, so my situation
is now I've got this little baby that I'm taking care of.
Well, I, you know, I also have, like I said, a great I have babysitters, I have my husband,
like it's okay for me to let them take care of her for an evening a week and or whatever
works for your schedule and then do the yoga class or do the breathwork session or go out
for a coffee date or do those things.
You just need to be very, you know, you need to be proactive about it.
You need to schedule those things in and you need to find a way that works for where you
at where you are at in life.
And so no, it is my I used to have like a really long luxurious morning routine.
And right now that's not a reality for me.
And that's okay.
I'm still finding those small ways to fill my cup as often as possible.
And sometimes it's easier, you know, feels easier than others.
But if you keep telling yourself, if that is the story you are telling yourself, I don't
have time, I am too busy.
I'm overwhelmed.
You know, I'll do it tomorrow.
Like that's never gonna end, you need to stop telling yourself that.
And then you need to find that small way to start taking action.
And that will start to build momentum and snowball into whatever that looks like for
you.
I sometimes tell my students, five minutes, you do have five minutes, you don't have five
minutes in the day for yourself, you have a real problem.
Right.
It's just five minutes, five minutes of that breathwork, five minutes of that stretching
as you talked about the journaling.
And then once it becomes a habit, maybe you can add another five minutes segment into
your day.
Well, like little bit and then adding from there doesn't have to be an hour workout.
Exactly.
We all have five or 10 minutes.
If you know, I guarantee you're on your phone scrolling Instagram, scrolling Facebook for
more than 10 minutes a day.
So if you have that time, it is it's a choice and I realize it's not always the easiest
to put the phone down and do something for your own mental wellness or overall wellness.
But it's that choice.
And when you start to make those decisions, yeah, it starts to snowball and it becomes
and feels just part of your everyday life.
It doesn't feel like you're doing anything super challenging and super hard.
Yeah, because it becomes part of your habit.
And sometimes I'm like a big scheduler.
I just put it on my calendar, whatever, 830 at night stretching.
And then it's on my calendar and it's like, oops, I guess I scheduled it.
I thought it would be a good idea.
And then once I'm done, I feel amazing.
It's just the fact of doing it.
But once it's on your calendar, it feels like you thought deep down that that's what you
need.
And you just sometimes need to think about how am I going to feel afterwards?
I feel absolutely I feel my cup.
And I spent five minutes doing something great for myself.
I did that self care and it's never really selfish to do this.
Let's remember the wellness Wednesday, the five minutes for yourself.
Thank you so much, Mary, for being here.
I really appreciate it.
And I look forward to connecting soon again.
And I'm going to do some stretching right now.
Yes, sounds good.
All right.
Thank you so much.
Thank you.
Bye.
All right.
That's it for today's episode of the Happy Healthy Hustle podcast.
I hope you enjoyed this wonderful recording of the 2022 Instagram live episode with Mary
Ochsner.
If you have any suggestions for future content or any feedback, please let me know.
I would also love to share with you that I'm about to launch my Journey to Wellness program.
And I'm sure that you as a happy, healthy hustler would love to be part of this wonderful
21 day transformational program.
It gives you some quick and easy tools that you can use at home to get your health journey
started.
Stay tuned.
And until then, we'll catch you next time.