Irina [00:00:00]:
I was in a very dark place after the breakup happened. I'm a single parent, and I was living in that state of uncertainty, depression, suicidal thoughts for about a year because I had the loss of identity. I didn't know who I was. I was someone else's spouse, someone else's mom, but Who is Irena? I didn't know anymore. So I decided one day that I cannot live like that any longer, and I need to change something. I didn't know what it was, but that's how my journey started. Thinking was my recipe for recovering after breakup.

Christiane [00:00:32]:
We are actually having a special guest, and we have Irina here today. And before I share a little bit more about Irina, I'm actually going to read out the podcast fan of the week, which the podcast fan of the week is by Greatest Student Alive 7. Alright. So the title of the review reads amazing podcast. There is so much to be learned by listening to this podcast. So greatest student alive 7. Thank you so much writing these wonderful and friendly words. I so appreciate it.

Christiane [00:01:11]:
If you have not left a review, go to the Apple Podcasts. Click on review. There are Stars. I would appreciate 5 star review and maybe even some friendly words such as greatest student alive. 7 just left. Doesn't have to be long. But it's very much appreciated. And I'm gonna give you a shout out on this podcast.

Christiane [00:01:30]:
And with that, I'm giving a big shout out to my guest. Hello there, Irina. How are you doing?

Irina [00:01:36]:
Hello. I'm great. Thank you so much for having me.

Christiane [00:01:39]:
Wonderful. Let me tell you a little bit about Irina Shehovsov, she is a best selling author, mindset and wellness coach who's on a mission for women to Feel empowered, healthy, vibrant with a renowned sense for life, uplifted to go after their dream. And she's also the founder of reclaim your life, It's all about living, dreaming, growing. She's also an NLP trainer, wellness and fitness coach, and a best selling author and podcast host. And I'm really excited that she's here today because as we always learn, Irina definitely has abilities to educate us about some fun things that she's doing right now. So, Irina, how would you summarize all these amazing accomplishments into your

Irina [00:02:29]:
power. My superpower, I think, listening and creating space for people so they feel comfortable sharing. Another superpower is creativity, building things from scratch that didn't exist before, figuring out as you go. I enjoy the fruits of my labor, whether it's baking, having a garden, painting. I also do singing. So exploring all the passions and living I know you're all about happiness. So living, creating that happiness in your life.

Christiane [00:02:59]:
So how did you, for instance, figure out that you Want to learn you mentioned singing. Is that right?

Irina [00:03:06]:
Yes.

Christiane [00:03:06]:
How did you figure that out? I sing in the shower. I actually sing in my workout classes too. And I'm sure my students are laughing right now. Were you singing, and how did you figure this out?

Irina [00:03:19]:
The singing was my recipe for recovering after breakup. Not not just that, but it was one of the things that I've discovered as I learned more about myself. I was in a very dark place after the breakup happened. I'm a single parent, and I was living in that state of uncertainty, depression, suicidal thoughts for about a year. Because I had the loss of identity, I didn't know who I was. I was someone else's spouse, someone else's mom, but who is Irina? I didn't know anymore. So I decided one day that I cannot live like that any longer, and I need to Challenge something. I didn't know what it was, but that's how my journey started to taking care of all the different things of your health because I know nobody's gonna come take care of me.

Irina [00:04:04]:
I have to do it for myself. And on my journey, this is where the life part comes in of reclaim your life. I believe in those 4 pillars, physical, emotional, mental, and spiritual health, and creating habits in your life that sustain instead of draining. So how did I arrive at singing? It was my way of opening up my voice. I also joined Toastmasters, which allowed me to be comfortable with being uncomfortable. And You are in this wonderful thing of about public speaking, and I was an introvert before and just, allowed me to all my my voice. Singing allowed me to speak to sing what I couldn't speak. It was a relief valve because being an analytical mind.

Irina [00:04:48]:
I have also a history of in corporate world, 20 years. Having that analytical background, It was nice reprieve to use the other part of your brain and to use the creative side where I was able to sing, I was able to dance, I was able to paint and discover all those passions.

Christiane [00:05:09]:
That's amazing that the outlet for you was a creative outlet Because, clearly, it came from a point of pain, but you created a beautiful outlet, which is the singing. And you also mentioned drawing or anything, creativity with that?

Irina [00:05:26]:
Wait. Painting. Like, it it's been always there on the back burner, but I love to do those things. I think it's an, how you call it, an expression that allows us to release our emotions on the days when we we feel sad or when we feel happy, we can use this as an outlet, any kind of creative outlet, whether it's doing Pilates, yoga, singing, painting, or rock climbing to let the emotions out so they don't get stuck in the body. And if We get stuck with those with especially negative emotions. They then can they develop in the sickness. So I think it's important to have that kind of outlet for emotional release.

Christiane [00:06:08]:
Very true. And it actually reminds me of a few studies, that I've seen in my life. So where coaches realized that especially small children are not able to always fully Verbalize their emotions. That one way is just to give him a piece of paper and a pen and just say, Just dropped. And, that is what you're expressing right there that you couldn't talk about it, but you started Singing about it or another outlet would be, as you mentioned, the drawing or some people do exercise. You're funneling your emotion Into an outlet, and you're letting it leave your body. You don't internalize it, but you rather just dump it out, and it turns into something beautiful. It's looking at, like, the phoenix and how you basically totally recreated your life.

Christiane [00:07:01]:
I wanna dig down a little bit more into the challenges. What has been the biggest challenge in your life, and how did you overcome it?

Irina [00:07:08]:
Yes. Yeah. The biggest challenge was becoming a per a single parent suddenly or a newborn and a 5 year old and not, knowing how to move forward and what to do next, what next step to take, suddenly becoming of a father and a mother for the children. And I I don't call myself a a best parent. I'm still figuring things out. So I think that was the the difficult part in, figuring out. And it happened suddenly, as I I found out 3 days before my son was to be born that apparently everything was a mistake. And then 3 months after the son was born, the dad, walked away.

Irina [00:07:49]:
And so I was reeling after my physical birth and, emotional pain, and I tried to keep everything together. I wanted I I was breastfeeding at the time, so I wanted to keep my top part happy so it stays and produces milk, while the other part of me was completely broken. And I felt like I was a shell, just an outer shell living a life. I called myself a soldier that went to work that never ends. Because when you're a parent, you're always the one. When when you're a single parent, even more just, doing the things that are expected of you, but emotionally and mentally not being there really. Yeah. I, like, fulfilled my obligations to make sure Everybody was alive.

Irina [00:08:33]:
But, emotionally, I wasn't happy. I was drifting away. So that was the

Christiane [00:08:39]:
moment. Yeah. I'm sure some of the audience here, whether they are single parents or were raised by single parents or have Friends that are single parents is something very important that if you have experiences yourself or you have friends that are single parents, Making this perspective shift in what they're experiencing because you are just a team of 1 and you're Creating all these different roles by yourself. I remember going through the PhD program, having some single parents in my PhD program. And then later on when I had children, I realized how much more could I have reached out to those students and should have offered help whether that was, babysitting or maybe making meals Or just talking to them, adult talk and not child talk, that I should have done a much better job. And I was just ignorant in that moment, not thinking about it. And once you walk the walk, you're realizing those are maybe some big shoes that those students felt right there. What would you claim was your biggest influence or influencer that helped you to this transformation where you are today, beaming And looking happy, having reclaimed your life.

Christiane [00:09:53]:
What happened?

Irina [00:09:56]:
I think there were many influencers along the path. The first one, I believe, was Mel Robbins, how she recovered from her own bedtime as she imagined that the 5 second rule, jumping like a rocket ship out of the bed and counting backwards to create a pattern interrupt in your head, 543 to 1. And you just go and do it because we only have 5 seconds to make a decision when we have a spirk of something. Because if we don't decide in those 5 seconds, our brain is gonna talk us out of that decision. Whether it's raiding a can in a meeting and speaking out or going in front and speaking to the audience. We only have this 5 seconds. And then throughout my journey, there were many others like Brendon Burchard. I think the environment's also great.

Irina [00:10:42]:
Play a great role. I was part of Brendon's mastermind in 2019 to 2020. And being surrounded by the people that We're doing the things, like, crazy things that coming from the corporate world. I didn't know what is this. But being there allowed me to see what is possible. And, it's the effect of who you surround yourself with than you are becoming, that person. And over the time, there were many more that came along.

Christiane [00:11:12]:
I love that you are picking on these experiences. It Sounds like you met Brandon in a live workshop. Is that right?

Irina [00:11:20]:
I was part of his mastermind. So it was a a growth summit conference in September of 2019. Mhmm. And they were enrolling people into a mastermind. I did not have any businesses or anything, but I had an idea. It's then when I decided to help women like myself to recover after breakup, who feel broken, who feel that their life is over. And so there was an opportunity to join the mastermind, and I did. It was the greatest kind of it was the 1st step I ever invested in myself, like, really invested in myself.

Irina [00:11:55]:
That kind of started my journey, to now having a podcast and having written 4 books and working on book 5 and 6 right now and also creating a 2nd podcast. I think it's all and creating courses also for women just like you about bringing happiness to people, realizing that they already everything that they need right inside of them, and just waking up to their own truths, to their own natural God given gifts that people have forgotten. Because when we're in the midst of despair, when we're in the midst of a difficult situation, we only focus on the things that aren't working, only focus on the things that are broken as opposed to being grateful, finding the silver lining in anything that have happened and retraining our mind on the positive things because where attention goes, energy flows. So what we focus on, that expands. And when we focus on the negative, we're just self sabotaging ourselves to relieve the same kind of reality over and over again, being in the past instead of creating a better future for yourself.

Christiane [00:13:01]:
You You probably sometimes wish that there would have been a coach like you are helping you out of your situation. And that's, probably something that really connects you to the women and to the single parents that are part of the audience there because it's something that, comes from a place of authenticity and trust, and really creates your expert eye right there. How can people get in touch with you, Yuri, now? And if they wanna learn more about you, your books, all the amazing services that you offer, share a little bit with us.

Irina [00:13:36]:
Most active on Instagram, and it's area.claimyourlife. My website is Irene Shehovsov.com. The podcast is called Single Parent Success Stories, and it's available on all the podcasting platforms. And I also have a YouTube channel called Happiness Academy, where I share about breakup recovery and the videos of the podcast. And I'm also launched A second podcast, which is called reclaim your life with Irina.

Christiane [00:14:04]:
I hope you enjoyed this wonderful interview with Irina, And I look forward to seeing you on the next episode.