1 00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:18,880 From the heart of a wood which lost its name long ago, is a place where a seeker of stories 2 00:00:18,880 --> 00:00:19,880 may go. 3 00:00:19,880 --> 00:00:27,960 If you've arrived in a story's your desire, come, take a seat, for what you require is 4 00:00:27,960 --> 00:00:30,960 a tale from the second storytime. 5 00:00:57,960 --> 00:01:00,440 Hilbert, could you pass me that knife? 6 00:01:00,440 --> 00:01:03,560 Oh, oh gosh, handle first if you don't mind. 7 00:01:03,560 --> 00:01:07,480 Oh of course I didn't take it as a threat. 8 00:01:07,480 --> 00:01:14,080 Why ever would you be threatening me when you're such a very good crow? 9 00:01:14,080 --> 00:01:15,360 Thank you Hilbert. 10 00:01:15,360 --> 00:01:17,960 Yes, hello dears. 11 00:01:17,960 --> 00:01:24,320 I of course am the first storyteller, and you know my loyal friend Hilbert. 12 00:01:24,320 --> 00:01:28,000 I was just making some delicious wild greens soup. 13 00:01:28,000 --> 00:01:33,360 All of the ingredients can be found outside in the garden, and it's so satisfying to combine 14 00:01:33,360 --> 00:01:35,440 them into something delicious. 15 00:01:35,440 --> 00:01:38,240 Oh, and this book here? 16 00:01:38,240 --> 00:01:40,080 It's our story for today. 17 00:01:40,080 --> 00:01:45,040 I don't actually have a recipe book, not for this soup anyway. 18 00:01:45,040 --> 00:01:53,560 All it takes is a good broth, some potatoes, oh and just a tiny pinch of dandelion greens. 19 00:01:53,560 --> 00:01:56,440 And you wind up with something amazing. 20 00:01:56,440 --> 00:02:01,000 While I work on this, why don't you make yourself comfortable and listen for the voice of the 21 00:02:01,000 --> 00:02:02,000 story. 22 00:02:02,000 --> 00:02:19,080 Today's story is Fine Print. 23 00:02:19,080 --> 00:02:43,240 Fine Print. 24 00:02:43,240 --> 00:02:48,800 They pulled a wrapped maxi pad from the cabinet under the sink with a stubborn scowl. 25 00:02:48,800 --> 00:02:54,080 They had considered alternatives to pads, but none were solutions. 26 00:02:54,080 --> 00:02:59,360 They were all just different ways of managing the same issue, but none came with the visceral 27 00:02:59,360 --> 00:03:03,920 satisfaction of physically throwing one's period into the trash. 28 00:03:03,920 --> 00:03:10,440 A few letters caught Aster's eye as they unwrapped the pad, and they winced. 29 00:03:10,440 --> 00:03:12,520 What's it going to be today? 30 00:03:12,520 --> 00:03:16,280 You go girl, girl power for life. 31 00:03:16,280 --> 00:03:19,720 There is nothing finer than having a vagina. 32 00:03:19,720 --> 00:03:23,600 What salt are you rubbing in the wound today? 33 00:03:23,600 --> 00:03:29,720 The text printed on the wrapper read, in a gentle curly script, it's okay, I hate you 34 00:03:29,720 --> 00:03:30,720 too. 35 00:03:30,720 --> 00:03:38,080 Aster's face cycled through several configurations of disgust, horror, hilarity, and confusion. 36 00:03:38,080 --> 00:03:42,720 They reached for the cell phone they'd neglected to bring into the bathroom this one time, 37 00:03:42,720 --> 00:03:45,920 and set the offending hygiene product aside. 38 00:03:45,920 --> 00:03:49,640 They pulled another from the package and read the text. 39 00:03:49,640 --> 00:03:51,000 Doubting yourself? 40 00:03:51,000 --> 00:03:57,680 So do we, obviously, was printed in the same polite font as the other pad. 41 00:03:57,680 --> 00:04:00,080 Aster dropped it and grabbed three more. 42 00:04:00,080 --> 00:04:03,000 One of us, one of us. 43 00:04:03,000 --> 00:04:07,840 Girls are great, and that's why you specifically are great. 44 00:04:07,840 --> 00:04:10,440 Wow, pathetic. 45 00:04:10,440 --> 00:04:13,480 Jeff, Jeff, Jeff, Jeff, Jeff, Jeff, Jeff. 46 00:04:13,480 --> 00:04:19,880 Aster tumbled out of the bathroom, panties up, pants around ankles, barefoot, and desperate. 47 00:04:19,880 --> 00:04:25,360 Their husband, Jeffrey, blinked, set his unsiped mug of tea down on the kitchen counter, and 48 00:04:25,360 --> 00:04:29,160 turned to the flustered love of his life. 49 00:04:29,160 --> 00:04:31,320 No paper? 50 00:04:31,320 --> 00:04:36,400 Instead of attempting to catch the hastily thrown maxi pad, Jeff waited until it careened 51 00:04:36,400 --> 00:04:42,000 awkwardly across the room, bounced off his chest, and landed on the floor. 52 00:04:42,000 --> 00:04:48,160 He tilted his head to the side quizzically and joked, uh, I'm all set, but thanks for 53 00:04:48,160 --> 00:04:49,160 thanking me. 54 00:04:49,160 --> 00:04:53,840 Don't be an asshole, read the crazy shit they printed on it, Aster snapped, finally 55 00:04:53,840 --> 00:04:56,360 remembering to pull their pants up. 56 00:04:56,360 --> 00:05:00,480 Jeff retrieved the wrapped maxi pad from the floor and turned the packaging over several 57 00:05:00,480 --> 00:05:04,160 times, searching for the small snippet of text. 58 00:05:04,160 --> 00:05:08,560 Uh, it says, women rule. 59 00:05:08,560 --> 00:05:11,440 I don't get it, how is that crazy? 60 00:05:11,440 --> 00:05:14,040 Aster snatched the pad back and read the text again. 61 00:05:14,040 --> 00:05:16,960 It was exactly as Jeff had read it. 62 00:05:16,960 --> 00:05:18,920 Aster breathed a sigh of relief. 63 00:05:18,920 --> 00:05:23,080 Oh, okay, I guess it was just a few of them. 64 00:05:23,080 --> 00:05:25,960 A few of your pads had crazy things printed on them? 65 00:05:25,960 --> 00:05:27,720 Yeah, hang on. 66 00:05:27,720 --> 00:05:32,400 Aster opened the bathroom door again and retrieved one of the pads that they had previously hurled 67 00:05:32,400 --> 00:05:33,960 to the floor. 68 00:05:33,960 --> 00:05:36,480 Aster checked the printed text again. 69 00:05:36,480 --> 00:05:37,560 Fraud! 70 00:05:37,560 --> 00:05:40,600 Read the cruel and curly text. 71 00:05:40,600 --> 00:05:42,960 Like this shit right here! 72 00:05:42,960 --> 00:05:46,880 Aster thrust the product into Jeff's outstretched hand. 73 00:05:46,880 --> 00:05:49,240 You go girl. 74 00:05:49,240 --> 00:05:50,800 Jeff read the text aloud. 75 00:05:50,800 --> 00:05:56,920 Well, I mean, yeah, that is pretty generic, but I don't know, I'd call it crazy. 76 00:05:56,920 --> 00:06:01,200 Aster took in a deep breath, attempting to cushion their internal rage. 77 00:06:01,200 --> 00:06:07,560 Okay, stop it, messing with me isn't helping, Aster seethed. 78 00:06:07,560 --> 00:06:09,320 It's not? 79 00:06:09,320 --> 00:06:13,200 Aster gestured wildly at the wrapped product in Jeff's hand. 80 00:06:13,200 --> 00:06:18,200 I mean, yeah, of course it's not a good time, why else would I be using one of those? 81 00:06:18,200 --> 00:06:23,000 Oh, no, it's period time I get it. 82 00:06:23,000 --> 00:06:25,720 You can't even begin to get it. 83 00:06:25,720 --> 00:06:27,000 Aster grumbled. 84 00:06:27,000 --> 00:06:31,040 Jeff took in a long, slow breath and rolled his eyes. 85 00:06:31,040 --> 00:06:34,160 I'm not messing with you is what I meant. 86 00:06:34,160 --> 00:06:38,080 I know it's not a good time to mess with you. 87 00:06:38,080 --> 00:06:41,080 Aster could feel heat rising on their face. 88 00:06:41,080 --> 00:06:44,480 Embarrassment was creeping in, but there was an unresolved issue. 89 00:06:44,480 --> 00:06:47,960 They tried to grab back the Maxi pad, but Jeff held it out of reach. 90 00:06:47,960 --> 00:06:50,680 Why are you turning this into a whole thing? 91 00:06:50,680 --> 00:06:54,240 The pad says something mean on it, I don't like it, that's it. 92 00:06:54,240 --> 00:06:57,360 Aster flailed and eventually retrieved the Maxi pad. 93 00:06:57,360 --> 00:06:59,560 It really doesn't though. 94 00:06:59,560 --> 00:07:00,720 Why do you care so much? 95 00:07:00,720 --> 00:07:02,720 You're getting pretty worked up. 96 00:07:02,720 --> 00:07:04,920 Jeff returned to his mug of tea. 97 00:07:04,920 --> 00:07:09,680 Aster knew that his love was right, but that knowledge did not ease the creeping and visible 98 00:07:09,680 --> 00:07:11,080 pressure. 99 00:07:11,080 --> 00:07:15,880 I just think that even if it's supposed to be sarcastic or something, you shouldn't 100 00:07:15,880 --> 00:07:19,480 print mean shit on a product like this, they defended. 101 00:07:19,480 --> 00:07:24,240 Agreed, but there's nothing really mean printed there. 102 00:07:24,240 --> 00:07:29,440 Jeff sipped at the warm mint concoction as it continued to steep. 103 00:07:29,440 --> 00:07:32,800 So I'm just making it up, Aster challenged. 104 00:07:32,800 --> 00:07:34,640 I didn't say that. 105 00:07:34,640 --> 00:07:37,240 I would have to be, wouldn't I? 106 00:07:37,240 --> 00:07:40,680 I didn't say you were making it up, Aster. 107 00:07:40,680 --> 00:07:46,200 But somebody printed hateful stuff on a product I use and it makes me feel like trash. 108 00:07:46,200 --> 00:07:51,400 The volume of Aster's voice grew louder, as did Jeff's in an attempt to keep up. 109 00:07:51,400 --> 00:07:57,440 I don't think it's really, why would I want to make myself feel like trash? 110 00:07:57,440 --> 00:07:59,760 I don't know, that sucks. 111 00:07:59,760 --> 00:08:01,440 Jeff suddenly shouted. 112 00:08:01,440 --> 00:08:04,640 I don't want to feel these shitty things about myself. 113 00:08:04,640 --> 00:08:07,040 I know that, Aster. 114 00:08:07,040 --> 00:08:09,720 Then why do I feel so bad? 115 00:08:09,720 --> 00:08:12,680 Because you aren't a girl. 116 00:08:12,680 --> 00:08:16,760 Jeff retorted, with a hint of a smile in his voice. 117 00:08:16,760 --> 00:08:21,720 In the following silence, the forgotten maxi pad slipped from Aster's hand, landing on 118 00:08:21,720 --> 00:08:24,280 the cool kitchen floor. 119 00:08:24,280 --> 00:08:28,600 Aster's mouth twitched, before they uttered a sustained wheeze. 120 00:08:28,600 --> 00:08:32,120 The familiar precursor to their laugh. 121 00:08:32,120 --> 00:08:40,280 Huh, now, what was it that I put in this jar? 122 00:08:40,280 --> 00:08:42,200 Maybe some dried lavender or... 123 00:08:42,200 --> 00:08:44,000 Oh, I have to get out of here. 124 00:08:44,000 --> 00:08:46,200 Oh, no, nothing good in there. 125 00:08:46,200 --> 00:08:49,320 Just a failed cooking experiment. 126 00:08:49,320 --> 00:08:55,960 But, oh well, no good in lamenting our mistakes, eh? 127 00:08:55,960 --> 00:09:00,080 Any rate, I hope today's story was as good as this suit. 128 00:09:00,080 --> 00:09:01,080 Eugh, eugh, eugh. 129 00:09:01,080 --> 00:09:03,880 Oh, of course there's dandelion bread for you. 130 00:09:03,880 --> 00:09:04,880 Eugh, eugh, eugh. 131 00:09:04,880 --> 00:09:10,840 Well, I'm going to enjoy this meal, but if there is a type of story you'd like to hear, 132 00:09:10,840 --> 00:09:13,000 please do let me know. 133 00:09:13,000 --> 00:09:27,080 For now, be well and carry today's story in your heart. 134 00:09:27,080 --> 00:09:35,480 Today's tale has ended, but return once again to this place where you are considered a friend. 135 00:09:35,480 --> 00:09:39,280 Return to this tower in its mysterious dwelling. 136 00:09:39,280 --> 00:09:48,440 For more from the Librarium, The Second Storyteller. 137 00:09:48,440 --> 00:09:51,720 Thank you for listening to The Second Storyteller. 138 00:09:51,720 --> 00:09:58,720 If you have a prompt for a story, please send it to thesecondstoryteller at gmail.com. 139 00:09:58,720 --> 00:10:03,600 If your prompt is selected, your name will be credited at the end of the episode. 140 00:10:03,600 --> 00:10:09,040 Today's prompt was a non-traumatic dysphoria story, please. 141 00:10:09,040 --> 00:10:11,640 Admitted by Araskley Egg. 142 00:10:11,640 --> 00:10:16,200 If you would like to help support the future of this podcast, please consider becoming 143 00:10:16,200 --> 00:10:22,880 a patron by going to patreon.com slash thesecondstoryteller. 144 00:10:22,880 --> 00:10:28,360 A donation as small as a dollar is greatly appreciated and helps keep us going. 145 00:10:28,360 --> 00:10:33,840 A donation of just $10 a month puts you on the list of current library card holders, 146 00:10:33,840 --> 00:10:36,640 and your name will be read at the end of the episode. 147 00:10:36,640 --> 00:10:41,840 The Second Storyteller podcast and the featured stories were written and created by Katie 148 00:10:41,840 --> 00:10:42,920 Chacon. 149 00:10:42,920 --> 00:10:46,120 The role of the Second Storyteller is played by Charles Scott. 150 00:10:46,120 --> 00:10:50,920 The role of the first Storyteller is played by Katie Chacon. 151 00:10:50,920 --> 00:10:54,720 Today's voice of the story was provided by Katie Chacon. 152 00:10:54,720 --> 00:10:59,840 The voice of the intro and outro is Chris Camp, and you can find the fantastic games he's 153 00:10:59,840 --> 00:11:08,240 worked on at rix.itch.io, that's r-i-k-s dot itch dot i-o. 154 00:11:08,240 --> 00:11:14,080 The music was written by Fintan, who can be found at garbagebag, all one word, dot itch 155 00:11:14,080 --> 00:11:15,720 dot i-o. 156 00:11:15,720 --> 00:11:22,080 The Second Storyteller will return next month with more magic, fun, and of course, a story 157 00:11:22,080 --> 00:11:32,800 to tell.